I Will Follow You Into The Dark
Rickorty Week Day 2, prompts are Alternate Selves and First Time
Title: I Will Follow You Into The Dark
Author: krsive
Rating: M
Tags/Warnings: Angst, Mental Sex, Alien Sex
The setting didn't inspire confidence, really. There was some kind of green scaly rat in the alley feasting on a discarded Morty Hut pizza. It must have rained before they portaled in because the petrichor still hung in the air, though it was pungent with the scent of garbage. The asphalt was gritty and damp. Morty stuck close to Rick the whole way down to the steel door which was apparently where they were headed.
“This is a-already the worst birthday gift ever, a-a-and it hasn't even started yet!" Morty complained. He didn't like the solemn disregard in Rick's expression.
"You're about to have a once in a lifetime experience, Morty. You're about to have the ultimate sex tourism ride. A little gratitude would be nice." Rick knocked a pattern on the door.
"We c-could have just had sex in a nice hotel. This place is too creepy."
"We can't have sex like this anywhere else. Didn't I tell you this was gonna be special? Even I've never done this before. Jesus, Morty. Always bitch, bitch, bitch."
"I—“
The door opened and a gruff Rick beckoned them inside. The room was large enough to feel airy though there were no windows. In one corner were two hospital beds and two huge bell jars, connected to one another by a mess of wires and tubes. It seemed a little menacing, but Morty couldn't dwell on it because something even stranger made itself known. Two swirling shapes like small cumulus clouds hovered in the air before him. One was a cool, dusty blue, and the smaller one was a dandelion yellow.
"Met Rick and Morty U-2571," Rick introduced.
"Um. H-Hi." Morty raised his hand in shy greeting.
You're late, C-995, said a Rickish voice, though there was no actual sound—just a distinct alien thought in Morty's mind.
"Of course we're late; we're Rick and Morty. You expect any level of personal organization?”
''W-we're sorry," said Morty.
At least your Morty has some manners. Let's get started, the blue cloud ‘said.’
Everyone seemed to know what to do but Morty, who was shooed towards the equipment in the corner. He didn't protest, though, until he was instructed to take his shirt off.
''Wait, though. What’s going on, here, Rick? I thought we were gonna…'' He darted a glance at the others. "You know…"
"We are. But it's gonna be like nothing we've ever done before. We're gonna swap bodies with these guys and have cloud sex."
"What?! I-I don't want to swap bodies with a smoke monster!'' Catching himself, he twisted his fingers together. "N-No offense."
None taken.
"Morty. Do you trust me or not? This is gonna be right up your alley. All intimate and shit. I chose you to try this with, you little ingrate. It's my first time, too."
That gave Morty pause. The two of them had been fucking for months, but Rick still seemed to be allergic to intimacy as a concept. Every time he began to share his heart with Morty, he ended up shutting down afterwards. If this was a true offer of vulnerability, Morty couldn't just turn it down.
''Fine,” he sighed, shoulders heavy. “Ok. Let's try it."
The gruff Rick set it all up, applying diodes and dialing in settings. The clouds went into the bell jars. Morty was asked to calm the fuck down and lower his heartrate, and eventually Rick had cooed him through it. Then came a moment of unspeakable pain, and every thing changed.
His new senses weren't senses at all, not in any way that Morty could understand. He saw without seeing, heard without hearing. It was like he just knew things about the world around him, his thoughts made of something invisible that he couldn't define. The bell jar opened and Morty understood that he was to exit in his new vaporous body. He was aware of the others, of the two beings borrowing their original bodies, the gruff Rick opening a private tent. And, especially, he felt his own Rick, his presence like bright neon in his mind.
This slaps. Rick's voice wasn ’t a real voice, but it made Morty feel good.
What now? Morty returned, though he didn't quite understand how he was speaking.
In the tent. I thought you ’d want some privacy.
Morty was surprised to find that he could intuit how to move with great precision, and he followed Rick into shady privacy.
Wh-What are they doing with our bodies? he asked.
Hedonistic flesh shit. Stop thinking about them. Rick crowded in on Morty. We're here for us.
Morty had begun to worry about his normal body, but everything changed when a wisp of Rick's vaporous body mingled with his cloudy self. The jolt of alien pleasure hit him like a bolt of lightning, and all other thoughts fell away. It was like his mind had become a sex organ. He saw, without seeing, a vision like a steel gate shaking, as if a battering ram was pounding against it. Running on desirous instinct, Morty pressed forward. Their smoky bodies mingled further, turning green as they mixed. Morty made a wish, and the gate turned to sunflowers that toppled to the ground in a heap.
Instantly overwhelmed by the swirling shared mindscape, Morty reached for the shape of his grandfather. And he was here to be found, joy of joys! Here was Rick as Morty liked to think of him, relaxed and laughing on the couch. Rick as a small child, crying and crying over a lost balloon. Here was Rick in a tuxedo, turning the wedding ring over and over in his pocket while he tried to remember how to breathe. Rick with his nose broken and bloody, glaring at his smug father. Rick in a hospital gown—but no.
Not yet . Rick's voiceless voice surrounded him.
It felt so good. Morty ’s very being tingled, like his soul was about to orgasm. Rick sounded like he was close, too. Morty could sense tremulous desire in him.
Look.
Inside their shared soul, Morty saw Rick's love, large and shimmering in unnamed colors. He knew without knowing how to proffer his own in return. He held it out, and Rick's wrapped around it. Rick's love opened like the Marianas trench, with depths unfathomable. Morty had no choice but to drown in it. Pleasure suffused him utterly.
I th-think I'm coming, said Morty. Can we come like this?
Rick's voice caressed him like a sweet spring breeze. It's sex, Morty. Of course we can come.
I want more.
They swirled together and Morty saw a strange sight, like their human bodies were combining and recombining in horrifying ways, faces and limbs changing, fading in and out, growing and shrinking. It continued without slowing, like a shimmering mirage flickering.
We were already one, Rick's phantom voice was hushed, awed. I never understood.
Morty's pleasure mounted as the grisly display went on. He let Rick's words carry him away until ecstasy exploded within him and swept it all away. Nothing existed but the thick whiteness of his orgasmic Nirvana.
Now he was a child, an infant, and Rick was holding him to his breast. Hush, little baby, don't say a word...
Is this real? Morty asked.
There are no lies here.
I don't remember this.
I do.
Who's my special guy? Rick asked the infant. Baby Morty blew spit bubbles.
The scene changed. Now Rick was small, Maybe four years old. A man stood over him, wire clotheshanger in hand.
No! Rick said.
The vision blurred for a moment, but didn't disappear. The man whipped Rick's little calves again and again, swearing all the while. Toddler Rick wailed, but the man didn ’t care. Morty felt himself growing bright, so bright that he burned the man right out of the scene. Rick moaned as the light of Morty enveloped his small self.
I love you, said Morty. He kissed the child on his brow.
Don't stop, begged Rick.
Morty hugged Rick more tightly and swallowed his body inside of his own. The pleasure was unbearable. They were the same, lonely children who only found love in each other. Suddenly Morty was an old man and Rick was a youth and his back ached but they kissed and Morty could feel Rick coming apart in his hands. They exploded into twinkling silver star, became the glorious heavens together. These orgasms were beyond anything Morty could have imagined.
Keep going. keep looking, Rick said, desperation quivering inside him.
You love me.
So much. Keep looking.
Morty, in his incorporeal self, took steps into the dark. He saw his grandmother, young, a spotlight turning her hair golden. She was weeping endlessly, and Mort knew with great assurance that Rick believed this was something he should never be forgiven for.
Not there, said Rick. Deeper.
I still love you.
Deeper. Morty. There's something...
Somehow Morty just knew what Rick meant.
He found himself in front of a castle covered in thorns. On the plants hung tortured versions of Morty, ones he recognized from bad memories together. With Rick panting and gasping in pained pleasure, Morty searched for the door. He tried to push it open, but it wouldn't budge. He uncovered a key hole and looked around.
You still don't trust me?
I'm afraid. Rick's honesty was at least refreshing. Please. This is why...
Then show me the worst thing. Show me the worst thing you ever did. You'll see, then. I'll still love you.
Morty could feel his hesitation, but this space was free from dishonesty, so a vision sprang to life before the door. It was a scene that Morty knew so well. He often thought of it at night to keep him warm. In the vision, Rick was hovering over Morty, hand cupping his cheek.
I couldn't stop myself, said Rick in the present.
They found each other in the vision, fell into a heated first kiss.
I ruined you. I love you but I did this to you anyway. I'm so ashamed. I'm selfish and disgusting. I ’m a fucking pedophile.
I know. Morty couldn't deny that in this space. But I love you, still. I love you. I'll always love you.
You shouldn't.
But I do. Look, look at me. I can't lie to you here. I forgive you f-for fucking up. I forgive you for ruining me. I'll forgive you every time. I'm in love with you and I ’ll never stop.
You mean it.
Morty found that now he had a key in his hand, and he hurried to unlock the door before it could vanish.
Here, again, was Rick in a hospital gown, sitting on a gurney. A doctor with a solemn affect stood before him.
''The metastasis is worse than we'd feared. It's spread to your lymph nodes, your bowel, and your brain. ”
Rick stared down at his hands. ''How long?"
"Even with treatment, I'd say six months at most.'' The doctor wore a gentle frown. "I'm sorry, Mr. Sanchez. It's time to make arrangements. I can have my office call you with recommendations for hospice..."
No.
No no no no no no
NO!
The vision vanished and Morty was in Rick's arms, thrashing to break free.
I couldn't say it out loud, said Rick.
Get off! Get off! Y-You have to fix this!
At this point I'm just a walking bucket full of tumors, Morty. Even citadel medicine can't save me.
No!
And Morty was crying with his entire bare soul. Rick joined him; they wept the same tears with the same eyes. Morty had always been so proud that he had inherited Rick's beautiful eyes. They both pulsed with distressing heat. Everything felt like worms squirming slickly around both inside and outside of him.
B-But 100 years...
Guess I'm a liar.
Operation Phoenix—
l destroyed all the healthy bodies, remember? If I try again I'll just make clone after clone with the same cancer. I could only buy myself six months at a time, and die painfully over and over.
It's not f-fair!
Morty became so tiny, a bird inside an egg. The shell made him safe, but it made him lonely. He felt the warm weight of mama bird Rick all around him. The heat was like the embodiment of his yearning.
I wanted to do this with you before it was too late, said Rick. I wanted to give you this.
There were no more words for Morty. He was in a pain without possible expression. Rick would be gone soon and there was nothing he could do. His heart went limp, his soul greyed out and paled. Changing shapes with no control. Morty let Rick cradle him in many forms. They were an artist and his muse, they were father and son, they were the sun and the tender crops, and they were the singer and the song. He fully lost track of time while Rick soothed him with an endless lullaby. He didn't understand what he was feeling, nor which thoughts were his own and which were Ricks. He wanted to stay this way.
l'll die, too, said Morty, when you go. I'll throw myself in the grave and they'll bury me, too.
No, said Rick. Morty could feel how certain he was.
I can't live without you.
You will.
I ’ll never love again.
Rick seemed to grow more solid. Good. Don't.
Forever.
Forever. You're only mine.
Will you wait for me when you get to hell? Morty wrapped his mind around Rick's tightly.
Morty saw himself through Rick's eyes, annointed in holy light. Morty finally saw himself the way Rick saw him, unbearably beautiful.
l'll break out just to find you.
They basked in the light together, swirling through one another. Morty had no more words for his pain, nor Rick's pain, nor their joint fear. The hurt had turned so beautiful that he thought it might kill them both and end all of this. Morty couldn't bear it, but he felt an obscene pleasure in the way they blurred, blended. This was true intimacy, feeling the same things with the same mind, without bodies or words to get in the way.
l love you, they said with one voice. I love you.
It was the only thing that mattered anymore.
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