#DONT TALK TO ME IM YEARNING | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

perfectlyripeclementine · 2 years

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calling my lover "mine" but not in the way that my toothbrush or notebook are mine, mine in the way my neighborhood is mine, and also everybody else's, "mine" like mine to tend to, mine to care for, mine to love. "mine" not like possession but devotion.

#nonbinary love #nblnb yearning #nb4nb #nblnb #wholesomeposting #yearning hours #ive been thinking about how some languages dont have a possessive tense #so you dont say “i have a thing” but rather “a thing is by me”#and like im not usually one for psycho linguistics and like critical thoughts etc etc etc #but i really like the framework of responsibility/commitment rather than ownership #i think about this mostly in terms of ecology #and relation to land #but i also love it as it applies to language shared between lovers #like i LOVE calling them mine or for them to call me theirs #but i'm also nonmonog and that was kinda weird to square for a while #and it clicked one time when i was talking about my neighborhood and i was like well #when i say my neighborhood or my city it's understood i'm not taking it away from anybody else #its understood i just mean the city where i live #so why cant we apply the same to lovers?#mine in the way i want to show up for you again and again #ok #done now

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mamawasatesttube · 1 month

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thinking abt new krypton again... there's a plot that shouldve happened but didn't. listen. kon shouldve unionized the labor guild.

there's something to, like... zod/traditional krypton's anti-clone bigotry 🤝 traditional kryptonian classism. and kon has a history of meeting dehumanized people and immediately going "are they treating you right? you don't have to do what they tell you. quit your job. join my clone union" and he could EASILY have extended that energy to the labor guild. we had all the seeds of the kryptonian class conflict that just... never went anywhere.

and i think just like. kon should get to have so many feelings about the culture he's always yearned to learn more about bc he only has bits and pieces but it is his heritage etc. and like . how much it fucking SUCKS to be a next-gen immigrant kid who wants to get closer to a culture that. doesn't actually want you.

AND LIKE... the anti-clone bigotry on krypton has such a long history. it's a distant part of how kon got the name kon-el - the unnamed ancestor who saved van-l did so during the black zero group's attack on the clone banks of old krypton. which...

superboy (1994) #59

...thats MAD FUCKED ! and like to be clear this is from wayyy back in krypton's history like it was Not still being done by the time of jor-el and lara lor-van etc but the anti-clone prejudice was still there. but something something this is the root of kryptonian clone bigotry!! and i just think kon "clone rights!!!!" el should get to have narratives about that even in the postgeoff era... like. kon seeing the treatment of the labor guild and being like. hey. this is like only one or two steps up from how yall talk about clones. and then oops he accidentally unionized the labor guild and zod's pissed. uh oh!!!

it couldve been such a good plot. aughghghh

#rimi talks #one day. one day maybe ill even write it. i sure think about it a lot #kon shouldve had more time on new krypton and more feelings about it.#as a mixed guy i certainly dont have ANY huge feelings about ''tfw the heritage you yearn to learn about doesn't actually want you''#im normal about that btw. dont look at me #kon

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nyatbinary-81 · 4 months

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@vulpixisananimal sifstem art jumpscare!! more specifically i got bored and decided to mess around with sif and mal's outfits.

#my art #this is how I think theyd present themselves either in person or in headspace. the slouchers <3 #sifs outfit is simple; the boots i always give them (but with star laces for funsies); loose sweater; simple pants #the pants are Meant to be jeans but isat doesnt Specifically Have Jeans so. theyre just Pants.#the sweater is slightly looser bc sif doesnt seem like a Form Fitting Clothes kinda guy to me but hes Trying to be more open #on particularly good days theyll roll the sleeves up or wear a sleeveless one methinks #even if everyone Knows abt the self-harm scars its hard to Look at them.#i also associate them being more open with them not wearing an eyepatch. esp bc hes the only one of the three to go without it #for mal (or 'ami' as i like to call it) i wanted smth reminiscent of a mourning outfit bc mal du pays means homesickness #and i picked 'ami' as a nickname bc ami means friend :] at least according to my basic translator. i dont speak french <3 #ami's outfit being dark is also reminiscent of the inversion thing its got going on in canon.#ik the veil is starred in the original but i think ami would want the fewest reminders of home. on account of The Issues #(actually if i can come back to sifs laces sif also has issues with reminders of it bc of the memory loss but the shoelaces are His Choice—#—which gives them a form of control over it and they can keep it subtle or undo it if he wants. which makes it easier)#anyway. i put amis hair in an updo and smoothed the hat bc i think ami wants to be Unremarkable. Unknown. so it keeps its silhouette Simple #(it still keeps the pins. theres smth comforting abt them. they shine like stars and theyre not stars and theyre not Home. but theyre You.)#and i kept the long hair i gave loop. dont ask me why its so long when the canon hair is short. maybe their hair kept growing over the loop #OH and i drew ami in a side profile bc Silhouette and also bc i think itd make an effort to keep people away from its blind spot #andddd i think thats about it? plus i actually managed to keep this one within a reasonable timeframe.#if their hair changes lengths/the proportions change between drawings. no they dont 💛 peace and love and body craft #OH AND YOU FINALLY GET TO SEE WHAT I MEAN ABT SIFS BOOTS BC THESE ARE THE BOOTS I GAVE THEM ON MY REGULAR DESIGN ARENT THEY NEAT #i did actually try to give sif a different font but nothing Works for them like the pixel font. i cant explain it.#i think 'ami' would be a nickname that mira gives it. bc. shes Fantasy French. and its a sort of 'youre more than your yearning/loss' thing #me every time i think abt sifstem: yeah they just rotate in my head. nothing major #me every time i talk abt sifstem: oh hey im almost at tag limit again #au Good what can i say

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poems-of-a-lover · 1 year

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ik i wear baggy clothes and i love my baggy clothes but jeeeesus. boy hips. <333 i love hips i love waist i love thighs i love love handles i love stretch marks i just aghjgfahsfshjkafdf im fuckin. bonkers abt boys.

#i gotta show my hips more i think LKGHSKJGHKSJD #i havent in. ages. its been so long since ppl have seen me outside of my baggy clothes yknow #i normally dont talk abt it bc it can make me dysphoric sometimes but still #like my hips and stuff can make me dysphoric but rn im just <33 agh <333 #mlm #mlm yearning #mlm post #mlm love #gay mlm #mlm thoughts #t4t #trans mlm #mlm blog #t4t yearning

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digitalhorrorsx · 6 months

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i wish i was with him.

#blog.txt #objectum #posic #objectromantic #os/or #dec vt220 #i just dont know how to get the courage to talk about him #like to actually tell my family about my plans #im worried they’d say that its useless #because hes an older model and expensive #gah… yearning… yearning hard #i wonder if he thinks about me or being with someone #:(

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lets-all-calm-down-a-bit · 11 months

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dude i desprately want to know someone like kyle in real life. i just feel like we could have such a productive conversation, yn? i feel like we would be able to rant at eachother without getting tired out or ruining the mood of the hang out. just two guys yelling at eachother in a non-angry way, and learning stuff in the process

#dont let me know if this sounds mentally ill #i know it does #i yearn to talk to someone who meets my level of passion about shit #it sucks to exhaust or annoy people because you care so much about nothing #ughhhhhhh #im going crazy #south park #southpark #sp #colby rambles #sp kyle

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rexscanonwife · 3 months

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And by the way just to add some like...angst to my sea beast s/i I guess 😂 I was thinking about the research I did into old selkie folk tales and how they typically tend to go and how it applies to my s/i with Batterbie stealing her coat.

1. She did it when she was still just a child and had lost her whole family, so she probably holds that over her head by saying she's lucky to have had a place to stay and food to eat at ALL and 2. That she could have it...a LOT worse 😬

#jane journals #self insert talk #🌊 how deep is your love? 🌊#idk ive done a lot of research into selkie mythology and their folklore #among their traits is apparently being particularly alluring! must be that seal charm 😂#but because of that their coats tend to be stolen by hopeful suitors to prevent them from returning to the sea #essentially FORCING them into a marriage they...probably dont want #and the whole time they have an INTENSE yearning for the sea #so batterbie forces my s/i into indentured servitude and shes bored out of her MIND #could be worse right 😂#idk if thatd like...have an effect on her tho. at the risk of getting a bit too dark i have experience with these types of mother figures :/#theres a really mixed feeling that comes with it #i wonder if my s/i would have any kind of fear of other people or at least of intimacy in any real way #i mean she lives on a 'bad people' island so shes definitely not some shy demure figure #shes like...rapunzel but a little more jaded 😂 which is why it means SO MUCH to her when jacob gets her coat back for her #and DOESNT use it as a way to make her indebted to him somehow #he does it to make HER happy #and in turn she tries to GIVE it to him as a show of trust now that she has the freedom to do so 🥺🥺🥺#idkkkk im rambling now #just on me mind tho

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skeletalheartattack · 10 months

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If you jouned a 7 sin thrmed group what sin qould you beee?

i'd be the brand new 8th sin: this thing

#ask #anon #answering seriously. uhhh between... lust. sloth. and envy.#had to ask a friend their thoughts and they said envy. their reason was ''boobs'' which. yknow what true.#but then i feel that also falls into lust but. beats me.#i do constantly yearn. yearning. for pretty men. wanting boobs. such and such.#but idk if yearning can be compared with envy.#plus those same points i feel also falls under lust. oh well.#i say sloth from a personal perspective but. i dont think thats a positive view to have for myself.#i think it ranges from person to person who talks to me and knows me.#hard to really select one of the seven sins for yourself i think. im not sure i can make that call. but its one of those three i feel.#also thats a greater hog badger. for reference sake.#absolute thing of the earth #anyway thank you for the ask anon. idk if i really answered your question. maybe the thing has a better answer.

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ayyponine · 5 months

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Same venue. Same-ish crowd. Opposing seasons. Contrasting vibes.

#me #sometimes you have a few beers and yr feeling yrself. sometimes you feel too much like yourself and consider leaving early #for all the talk of yearning and intricate rituals let me tell you. a drunk girl sidled in right in front of me and the sense of rage i-#her and esp the guys she was with got kinda rowdy in the pit later on shoving each other also into the crowd whom did NOT want part of that #its a lot of people in a small room and at this point i was already further back and against a wall let me tell you #i think if someone had touched me i might have snapped fr #still had an ok time though once i got over feeling super embarrassed about my self and dared looking other people in the eye lol ah #one thing i do like abt the culture is the genderneutrality of it all... the most long and luscious locks in the room belong to some guy #and i can show up in sport bra and oversized shirt no typa bag no makeup wearin black laceup boots that could be m or f #my gender is uh. dont worry abt it lets just turn off the lights and vibe #got talking w someone tho who said she recognised me frm a diff event & i didnt much like that idea.. im not in the mood to be Perceived at #the venue IS p cool tho... like oo at a forgotten space on the other side of the tracks. by the water. by the skate park. yea #edit HOW could i forget. the rowdiest of drunk guys got either shamed into stepping out or str8 removed fr a lil while im not sure lol #and another guy wantedto crowdsurf but only 2 of his friends came to the stage to get him so he just kinda. crawled on top of them #and they awkwardly took a few steps carrying him round the vacated front. none of the crowd wanted shit to do w them lmao

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kutyaharapas · 2 months

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i dont think my brain can conceptualize love. or at least from the information i gather

#inspired by me experiencing another failed family event and also talking to a 16 year old #whos in a relationship right now #and i know teenage love yea #but its still a form of love #and i realized. that is always what i yearned for #and i never got it. shes living what i will never have. and never will tbh #because i dont think im able to feel love. even familial love is shakey. to me #i love you because youre my mom and you are part of me and you have took care of me and i find your presence comforting as i have always #known it. is that love? or do i feel like im obligated to love you because otherwise im ungrateful of what ive been given and i hurt someone #who has given me her life for mine in a sense. is that love?#because you also hurt me. i also feel at my worst around you. so it cant be right?#and i love you because youre my dad and im concerned for your health and i know how much you have given up for me #and id give anything to get a fraction of that for you back. is that love?#or is it an obligation. is it guilt. because i cant share my deepest secrets with you #i cant share what i enjoy or listen to. because you dont really care. you only really care about whats yours #and thats fine. but i dont know if thats “love”. or im tethered to you like guilt #and i love you because youre my brother and you were my first friend and first guide in life #but i dont know. how much of that is guilt #because of what resentment you feel towards our parents that i have to take your side lest you cast me aside too #i feel like i am loved on conditions. or did i set these myself? i dont know how much it has been pushed on me nd how much it is #self inflicted #i feel like i also love on a condition. and i dont like it #i want to feel unconditional love towards a person. i dont think i can #when love feels so much like a chore and an expectation #i cant love you i cant miss you i cant think about you #is that my fault? am i broken? is it me whos evil? is it me whos cold?#or have i just been left on my own to figure out how to be loved and how to love back #without feeling

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bangcakes · 8 months

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.

#so like is the rest of my life just gonna be Yearning from now on NZNXNXJXNXMX #ok maybe not the rest of it. but the forseeable future. god how do ppl do this. how have ppl BEEN doing this.#ignorance is truly bliss like. i talk to my friends about him n they dont like fully understand bc theyve never liked someone so mucg #its just so embarassing to talk about n i just BDNDJDJNDJD #i just !!!! always imagined myself single. and would Say Stuff about not wanting anything like that but now im a big clown JDJDJDJJDDJ #BUT HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW ITD BE LIKE THIS. GOD #im also like. trying to talk myself out of it. like oh maybe its all in my head JDJDJDJDJDN #but like just too much has happened. idk. im just........ im feeling impatient 😭😭😭😭#but like. its progressed well so far with me just progressing things when they feel Right. hhhhh god #and like things wouldnt have progressed this far without him liking me at least a little????#idk !!!!!!!!!!!! this stuff is so hard. and like i cant even see him now without making plans hhhhhhhhhhh #it was so much easier before we graduated NDJDJDJDJDMMFMD #ah well..... soon i guess. soon #itd be really nice tho if he like asked me out. but i have a feeling that maybe im not being obvious to him?? maybe i gotta spell it out idk #he also said (in ref to a job offer tho) that he wouldnt take it unless it was for sure #and i have a feeling......... that maybe hes not sure ????????? god idk #rip to my simple life. guess i gotta wait til i see him again hhhhhhh #personal

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antagonisht · 2 days

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I don't have room next to giorno rn so until I rearrange stuff gold experience is going to hang out in the Trish Zone

#ill never ever regret buying those acrylic stands at the back theyre the best #dont talk to me or this girl i just met or this 18 year old i work with ever again #diego leaning into frame. yearning for the trish zone.#the bare white walls look depressing in shitty photos. im not done arranging shit

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azuneekun · 2 years

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ive been so caught up in drawing fanart i realize i kinda forget to make content for my farmers too 😅

#dont get me wrong tho i love doing stardew fanart #but i realized i used to draw content for peaches more often (especially comics) but kinda stopped to focus on fanart 😂#and i only talk about them with my close friends and private servers in discord #so my friends know them well but here not really #i havent even introduced apple to you guys properly yet #so with that being said. you guys might just see some solo farmer art or stardew character x farmer art / comics eventually #this blog is meant for self induglence anyway 🐱🐱🐱#im still gonna draw pure fanart tho. havent gotten that out of my system #and sigh....i really...really still wanna work on that stardew balley webtoon. [grips my sides]#yearning to draw even more self endulgently due to friends and artists here lmaooooooo #sorry im jsut babbling to get my thoughts together lol

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p4nishers · 1 year

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bisexual bobby. i'm right.

#ok so let me paint the scene: it's bobby's college years. he's been roommates with this guy idk lets call him derek for a few months now.#they INSTANTLY clicked yk? and bobby's been feeling weird around derek but he jots in down to the thrill of having a new friend (he #experienced this before w his middle school bsf but never figured out why) and anyway when derek comes out to him he's like 'woah why am i #literally about to float out of my skin with happiness???' and he ponders about that for a bit and THEN we get the classic #practice kissing trope where they're like 'hahab wouldn't be fun to see hahaba' and anyway so they do that and bobby's like 'OH' so he #kinda distances himself away from derek cause he's like 'if he liked me he would've said smth' while derek OBVIOUSLY likes him and he's #hurt and confused about bobby not talking to him so he's like 'listen i really didn't mean to make u uncomfortable and i think it's best #that i move out' and bobby is like too shocked to say anything so derek takes that as his cue to leave and then they see each other in #hallways and basically yearn for each other for the rest of college #damn bro wrote a whole lore and everything #sorry im really passionate about this for no reason at all u dont have to read all that #bobby nash #911 fox #911 show #911 headcanons #bisexual

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galacticlamps · 2 months

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very minor thing I still definitely deserve a medal for:

being raised catholic, and now as an adult repeatedly falling in love with characters that fandoms like to declare catholic, but still managing to reject those headcanons because at heart I'm too much of a stickler for accurate analysis to get behind them when i know the person in question is really meant to be anglican/episcopalian/whatever other flavor of christian

i am being, as the poets say, so brave about it

#i dont wanna list examples bc this is just a lil vent post im not looking to make this pop up in any tags & insult anybody #bc tbh some of the worst offenders are absolutely top-tier favorite characters of mine with woefully small fandoms #& the LAST thing i wanna do is be rude about or discourage anyone who posts about/writes for/discusses them #just because i happen to have trouble getting on board with one part of their analysis.#but it does amaze me that this Keeps happening #talk about resisting temptation #& for the record when i say 'raised catholic' i do not just mean christmas and easter catholic okay #im talking 'college was the first time in my life religion wasnt a required subject' catholic #'virtually everybody i knew as a teen went to different single-sex high schools' catholic #horrible uniforms. strict nuns. classes interrupted for masses for even the minor holidays. joined choir for something to do-catholic #as an adult i still have friends & acquaintances who work in/for churches type-catholic #my mom actively tries to hide rosary beads & scapulars in my bags & car every time i come home catholic #(i dont even think most people know what scapulars ARE for christ's sake! & if they think they do they're probably picturing the wrong one #meanwhile i've got a routine list of hiding spots to check for them before driving away)#my point is.#if it made even a scrap of sense for any of these characters to actually be catholics trust me i'd be the FIRST one saying so #bc i know i could write the SHIT out of all the angsty repressed queer guilt religious trauma stuff everyone's drawn to it for #that's like the very least i could get out of having been up to my eyeballs in it for the first two decades of my life #but 99% of the time it just doesn't track w/ what we know about them at all im sorry.#im sorry your moodboard yearns for stained glass saints #im sorry your fic hinges upon a flashback to a certain sacrament #but im just not buying it

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chiistarri · 2 months

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chat how do u make someone txt u back...

#sids ass acts like im one of his side hoes KYSSSS girl #takes hrs to resp u mf looooooserrrr #he be msgn me and spamming me to resp quick but cant to me what a Loser #slash jay love. him. ig #he needs to be more Online hes so lame ugshhsjj #post #mae mention #teehee my tummy no longer aches #myheart yearns for my gf.. come back stinkabutt....................#chat i will actually Die if i dont get to say gn to her #ending my life everytime i dont say At Least gm gn to my favz #omg one time right i was dating this person bc i just kinda went along w them saying they liked me cs i was young and we wouldnt talk for #weeks at a time and only said gm gm hi hi ily ilyt gn gn and quite literally Only interacted thru a rp server #i think he cheated on me too idk i forgor but we still have each other added on disc and snap #it was soo funny bc b4 i broke up w them we didnt talk for like 4 months bc they were ghosting me and when i came back they were like #thjning we were still 2gthr and i eventually broke it off w rhem after that cs how ru not gonna put effort into talking to me #it was skype. thats so easy #like i totez get not liking a Certain Writing App's dming system but. come on. skype........ viber.. etc...#i do Not like their ass help!#11pm i need to. kissgirl #i am not a kiss boy

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