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dreaminglonger2nite · 4 years

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My Supernatural Finale Thoughts

After taking a couple days to think and digest the Supernatural finale (and basically cry nonstop for 3 days), the more and more I believe it was absolutely perfect. It’s literally exactly how I believed the series would end and in following the show for the last 10 years, I truly believe this is the best ending for all the characters. At the end of the day, the show is about SAM & DEAN. And to have an entire episode focused on wrapping up their story is all any of us should’ve been happy with:

- Did any of us honestly think Dean was going to survive the end of the show? I don’t know how many times it was mentioned that Dean knew he was going to die fighting and that he didn’t see an end to hunting as a reality in his life. He always wanted Sam to get out and while there continued to be a big bad every season, there was no opportunity to stop. Once they defeated Chuck, there was some semblance of peace, but obviously still monsters and obviously still a chance they both could meet their end sooner rather than later which is exactly what happened. There is no way in any reality Dean would’ve been happy doing something else and selfishly did I want to see Dean grow old with Sam? Of course. But was it realistic? Not at all.

- Also, Dean didn’t die by a rusty nail and it pisses me off that people continue to minimize this. He died because a long thick piece of rebar stabbed him in the back, obviously puncturing something major, his heart or lungs due to how quick he died. It also was at an angle so who knows exactly what it hit. He felt like he couldn’t move off of it without falling apart so it wasn’t something small. The piece actually looked long enough that I thought it almost went all the way through. Poor Dean :(

- Also, what could’ve been more fitting for him to die by? Obviously this entire time there has been some divine intervention by Chuck keeping them alive but now that Chuck is gone, there was nothing keeping something like that from happening. I mean, how many times on hunts are they an inch away from death and yet somehow pull through? Yes you can argue that Dean has beat pretty much Heaven and Hell and everything in between but how would that have looked if finally one of those big bads defeated Dean? This way, Dean didn’t lose to the enemy, or his lack of strength, he literally lost to bad circumstances. Their environment they were fighting in had numerous dangerous spots and unfortunately Dean fell victim to his surroundings. I don’t look at this as “omg a nail beat Dean Winchester?” I look at it as something out of his control finally won out and that’s not Deans fault. Bad place, bad time. And it parallels Sam’s death in season 2, the saddest and most impactful death of the series.

- I absolutely loved the speech to Sam and making him promise to keep fighting and living and carrying out the legacy they had both created. Sam had the ability to move on and attempt a normal life (remember when Dean went to purgatory?). There is no way in hell that it would’ve worked the other way around. Dean cannot live without Sam. This has been established time and time again. But Sam also kept a piece of himself separate and this is what allowed him to keep Deans promise and live for himself. He always wanted Sam to live a long life and he kept Deans lasting wish.

- As far as the lack of Cass, I mean cmon. Yes we all love Cass but I felt his story ended already. He died saving Dean and that was fitting for his character. Seeing anyone else in this finale that wasn’t laser focused on Sam and Dean would’ve cheapened it. He was a beloved, fan favorite character, but at the end of the day the heart and soul of this show is between the Winchesters and if this truly is the last time we see them together on screen, I don’t want anything else. Could they have mentioned him a bit more, absolutely. That was actually a large criticism of mine that we didn’t get a lot of grieving, but we know Sam and Dean feel it and it affects them everyday.

- Don’t @ me about Destiel. I don’t care if you ship them, everyone is free to do what they want and ship who they want but it really had no place in this finale and if you can’t see past that, I think you miss the point of the show altogether.

- Seeing Dean in heaven, finally getting the peace he deserves literally broke me into pieces. Knowing he had to wait for his brother to fully accept it was fitting. He finally gets to be with family and friends and his Baby and when the time comes, his brother. But he’s fine to wait, he knows Sam is living and that’s all he ever wanted. And when Sam finally arrives, he knows this is forever and he will never have to worry again. Cut to me crying all the tears.

- Seeing how strong Sam was literally had me sobbing and was such a change to earlier seasons Sam who either turned into a robot hunter or an angry, revengeful drunk when he lost Dean. He has grown so much and the strength it must’ve taken to move on, have a family, have photos and momentos everywhere reminding him of the family he lost would be heartbreaking. We all know that a large part of Sam died when Dean did but somehow he was able to pull through and make something different out of his life and grief. He did feel Dean with him everyday and he knew they would be reunited someday together. The ultimate sacrifice but a blessing in disguise. Sam was able to continue the Winchester legacy and who knows what his son was doing with his life. Perhaps he inherited the bunker and Baby and signed his own initials next to his family. Maybe he saves people too.

- Sam has always been my favorite character, I definitely consider myself a Sam girl. And I am so happy he got the chance to live a happy, apple pie life as much as he possibly could in his grief. When they showed him breakdown in the impala, I know he felt Dean on the other side right there with him. Not only did he miss him so much but also the old life he used to live, saving people and hunting things next to his big brother in his home on the road. I wonder how often he visited Baby just to try and conjure up those memories of Dean and his friends and his old life he said goodbye to. Almost as if this was Deans grave where he could go to feel close to him and maybe talk to him.

- When Sam died and that haunting cover of Carry On My Wayward Son started playing, I lost it again. I didn’t want to see Sam die, and knowing this was permanent as well was heartbreaking. But also being aware that meant Sam was so close to seeing Dean again made it all okay. It was okay for him to finally let go and get his much deserved peace. He wouldn’t have to suffer anymore and that’s perfect.

Basically this entire episode I cried from start to finish. I thought it was a beautiful finale with callbacks, funny movements, heartbreaking moments, Sam and Dean brotherly love, and finally an ending to this Winchester saga. I always worried how they might decide to end the show. Would they both die bloody? Lose the war? Both live long lives and die in a nursing home? Become monsters? One of the many endings of Chuck? But in the end, this is the best ending they could’ve given us and I really believe that. I know the creative team worked their asses off trying to find a way to end this 15 year journey and I really don’t envy them and that stress but I feel like this felt like Supernatural and really narrowed down the heart and soul of this show. Take everything else out, all the other characters, and you will always have Sam and Dean, the best platonic love story there is. What better way to end than to give them peace and togetherness for all eternity. They have certainly earned it.

Thank you Jared and Jensen for your undying support for these characters and never giving up on this story. Your portrayal has moved me and changed my life. 💕

#supernatural #sam winchester #dean winchester #sam and dean #supernatural finale #carry on #winchester brothers #jared padalecki #jensen ackles #mischa #castiel

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scoobydoofenshmirtz · 3 years

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LGBTQ Supernatural Character Breakdown

Okay so yesterday I posted this lovely screenshot of yet another stupid reddit post about spn that I thought was funny and shrugged off as another reddit dudebro thing. However, then @thehappyearth went and actually read through the thread and reported back with results. The opinions of OP were unsurprising, but they got me thinking. Part of the post reads "I would prefer a neutral show that doesn't aim to include LGBT people in nearly every episode.. its unrealistic unless they are in a location where this holds true..example (California)". Now that's ridiculous for a lot of reasons. 1) Not having LGBT people in a show does not make it "neutral." Cishet is not the default human experience, neither is male, nor white nor able-bodied, etc. 2) It's not "unrealistic" to have LGBT in literally any location in the world. We exist everywhere you go. Yes, certain places tend to attract LGBT adults and families due to their culture, legal protections, history, etc. but it's not like there's something in San Francisco water that just makes people there gay at a higher percentage. I assure you, reddit user, there are LGBTQ people in every single place Sam and Dean have visited in the show. 3) like literally it's just homophobic shut up reddit bros. ANWAY...

But what really got me thinking was the "nearly every episode" comment. Like, dude. What show are you watching? But then I thought...wait how many LGBTQ characters actually are there in Supernatural, so I did a little digging and compiled this list (google sheets) of every LGBTQ character to appear on screen. This doesn't include characters who are only mentioned (although there aren't many to add with that anyway). I looked into some different criteria and I included each character, the number of episodes they appeared in, their first and last episode, how many episodes they appeared in as a confirmed LGBTQ character, their sexuality, if they speak or not, and if they died. I also included a description and notes, and noted which characters were in episodes nominated for GLAAD awards. I also included "ambiguous" characters who I either felt weren't "confirmed" as LGBTQ (like the man who is possibly a gay porn star or the sassy yorkie) but in that realm, or characters where there were bigger issues that make it more complicated (Dean, Crowley, and Rowena).

And then I got curious and made a whole second spreadsheet with a list of all the episodes featuring confirmed LGBTQ characters. I included which characters are featured, if it includes an LGBTQ couple, if it features an LGBTQ storyline important to the plot, if it features a recurring LGBTQ character, if any LGBTQ character dies, if it was nominated for a GLAAD award, and my opinion on if it's homophobic. I only included episodes where a character was confirmed LGBTQ when it aired, however I did include retroactively LGBTQ characters when listing what recurring characters are featured.

Some findings under the cut:

I counted a total of 32 on screen (reasonably) confirmed LGBTQ characters in all of Supernatural (for the purposes of this I have counted Charlie and apocalypse Charlie as separate characters). Now when I say confirmed this is a range from Charlie to characters who had a same sex kiss in the background. There is a chance I have missed some, so if you look through this and notice someone missing, please let me know. (Also sidenote I say LGBTQ but there's no confirmed trans characters as far as I could tell). That's an average of 2.13 per season. There are 9 recurring characters and 23 that only appear once. There are 6 with 3 or more episodes. The only characters that appeared in more than 2 episodes while confirmed as an LGBTQ character are Charlie (apocalypse world and regular) and Chuck. Of all these characters 10 are dead (with three of these presumably resurrected off screen) and 22 survived.

If we break it down by era Kripke had 4 with 0 recurring characters and half and half dead/alive. This is .8 per season average. Gamble had 3 and (at the time) none were recurring and none died. This is 1.5 per season average. Carver had 10 including making Chuck bisexual. Charlie also became a recurring character (then she died). This is 2.5 per season average. Dabb has 15 including Castiel and Claire. This included 7 recurring characters and 8 one offs, and 8 alive and 7 dead. This is 3.75 per season average.

As far as sexualities go, we have 3 (presumably) lesbian characters (2 Charlies and Donna's niece) 3 gay characters (Max Banes and 2 one offs who die) and 2 bisexual characters (Chuck and Noah the gorgon). No single character ever refers to themself by any sexuality as far as I can tell, but Alan J Corbett (Ghostfacers intern) and Conner (from the church) are both referred to as gay by other characters. Everyone else I based on context. All the other characters were unspecified as to their specific sexualities.

In terms of episodes with confirmed LGBTQ characters (so characters who at the time the episode was written were reasonably confirmed as LGBTQ) we have 39 total, a bulk of them being episodes that feature either Chuck or Charlie. That's about 12% of all SPN episodes. If you take out episodes that only include either Chuck or Charlie as the confirmed character you have 20 left which is 6.25% of all SPN episodes.

There are 12 episodes that feature an LGBTQ couple, 3.75% of all episodes. There are, by my count, 9 episodes with an LGBTQ storyline important to the plot or 2.8% of episodes. I know this is more subjective but I included Ghostfacers, Girl with the Dungeons and Dragons Tattoo, LARP and the Real Girl, Sacrifice, The Chitters, Wayward Sisters, Ouroboros, Gimme Shelter, and Despair.

If we break down writers from who has the most episodes with confirmed LGBTQ characters Robbie Thompson comes in the lead with 9, Buckleming next with 6, Bobo and Dabb with 5, Yockey and Glynn with 4, Davy Perez with 3, and Nick Vaught, Nancy Won, Nancy Weiner, Eric Kripke, Jeremy Carver, Sera Gamble, Brett Matthews, and Bed Edlund all having 1. As far as writers who introduced new LGBTQ characters or canonized previously existing ones we have again Robbie Thompson in the lead with 7, Dabb with 6 (although 4 were from co-written episodes), Berens with 4, Yockey and Glynn with 3, Brett Matthews, Davy Perez, Nancy Weiner, Eric Kripke, and Nancy Won all with 2. Gamble and Edlund each have 1 and Buckleming sort of have 1 since they introduced apocalypse world Charlie. All of this is quantity not quality, so keep that in mind.

As far as deaths go, Bobo has the most with 3.5. 3 of those are from Despair where the characters were all (possibly) resurrected and the .5 is for Kaia who later turned out to not actually be dead. Yockey has 2 (both from Ouroboros). Edlund, Glynn, Perez, and Gamble all have 1 and Dabb also has .5 for cowriting Wayward Sisters.

The LGBTQ character who appears in the most episodes is very obviously Castiel who appears in 142 total episodes. Chuck is next with 19 and then Charlie with 7. Chuck has the most episodes as a confirmed LGBTQ character with 12 total and Charlie has 7.

Apologies if any of the math on this is wrong or if I left anyone out. Feel free to let me know and I'll correct the documents.

So really I don't know why I did this but basically yeah I don't know what fantasy world those reddit dudes are living in with LGBT people in nearly every episode (unless he's counting Castiel which...win for the gays I guess?). Nothing about this was particularly surprising but it's interesting to see all these things laid out and play around with the categories. Um...hope you enjoyed this i guess. lol

#supernatural #spn #spn meta #castiel #charlie bradbury #long post #also thank you robbie thompson you gave us 7 total gays and did not kill a single one #good job king

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katehuntington · 4 years

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Title: Black Dog - part seven Word count: 3100± words Episode summary: When Sam gets an anonymous phone call with information about his father, Dean receives a text message with coordinates to different location. The brothers clash and split up, one following orders, the other trusting his instincts. Meanwhile, in the wilderness of Cascade Range, Washington State, Zoë loses grip on a personal case and is forced to confront her demons. Without back up, this might very well turn out to be her final hunt. Part seven summary: Zoë and Dean try to form a plan of action, now that they are stuck in a cabin with hellhounds surrounding them. One wrong move can mean their end. Episode warnings: Dark! NSFW, 18+ only! Angst, gore, violence, character death. Description of blood, injury and medical procedures. Supernatural creatures/entities, mentions of demon possession. Swearing, smoking, weaponry. Descriptions of torture and murder. Illegal/criminal practices. Mentions of nightmares and flashbacks. Descriptions of suicidal thoughts and tendencies, depression, panic attacks, hallucinations. Author’s note: Beta’d by @winchest09 & @deanwanddamons. Thanks, girls!

Supernatural: The Sullivan Series Masterlist

S1E03 “Black Dog” Masterlist

“Can I ask you somethin’?”

Zoë looks up, but can’t see the hunter who prolonged her life from where she’s sitting. She hasn’t moved much, still facing the fire that is raging now, filling the cabin with a comfortable heat. The tremors have stopped, her respiration much calmer now. Her body seems to have recovered from the initial shock of the traumatic attack. With the adrenaline gone, her leg hurts badly, though, the pain having her grit her teeth. She tries her best to block out the loud noises of pots and plates being moved in the cupboards of the small kitchen, increasing both her headache and frustration. “Shoot,” she replies, her voice much weaker than she would like it to come out of her mouth. “If you were so dead set on dying,” Dean says while pulling out a drawer, “then why did you stock up enough food and water to survive a fucking apocalypse?” The huntress scoffs. “Hoping for a miracle, I guess.” “Does this mean I’m your miracle?” Dean moves into her peripheral vision with a can of tomato soup, a pot, some cutlery, and a can-opener in hand, setting the items down on the ground next to her for later. He has a boyish smirk on his face, apparently amused with his own remark. Zoë rolls her eyes. She’s been stuck in this little house on a hillside for a little over an hour now, and this manchild is already getting on her nerves.

“Let’s see if I can work miracles and get some help, because I have a feeling we’re gonna need it,” Dean slides his hand into the pocket of his leather coat, taking out his phone. Zoë watches him, noticing a hint of hesitation. “Who you gonna call?” she wonders. “The nerd.” “He’s downhill?” she presumes.

Dean drags his teeth over his bottom lip, but doesn’t answer. Instead, he stares at his Motorola as he looks up Sam’s number. His thumb hovers over the call button, but he doesn’t press it. Judging from the pause, Zoë is able to connect the dots; she knows something happened between the brothers.

“You two got into a fight, didn’t you?” she assumes, not beating around the bush. He glances over his phone to meet her gaze, then confirms with a nod. She can distinguish the concern and guilt in his stance; it’s bothering him. “That bad, huh?” Zoë huffs. “Where is he then?” “He was heading to Nashville,” Dean tells her. “Tennessee?” she checks, stunned. “That’s a long way from Waco. Why the hell is he there?” “It was the weirdest thing,” the older Winchester recalls, still unable to wrap his head around the strange lead that ultimately led them to have the biggest fight since Sam went to Stanford. “Someone called him, didn’t identify herself, and claimed that she knew where Dad was.”

Zoë frowns, her interest peaked. For one, she is very curious about how this Mystery Lady would have gotten her hands on that kind of information, since John has basically been as invisible as a ghost. She knows, because she has been trying to track him down as well, but of course, that is a detail the huntress is going to keep to herself.

“How did she get Sam’s number?” she questions, instead. Dean shrugs. “Beats me, but when it comes to finding Dad, Sam can be quite--” “- obsessive? Yeah, I've noticed,” Zoë chuckles, remembering the long conversations she had with Sam and the arguments the boys had in her presence.

The guy who usually is so quick to respond to such a comment, seems distracted now, staring down at his Motorola. “Fuck.” “No signal?” she presumes. “Nada,” Dean sighs, thinking of another solution. “We need to reach him, especially if David sends out an S.O.S. signal. Sam needs to realize what he’s dealing with before he charges up here.”

Realizing the Winchester in her company is right, she ponders. If the younger brother goes into this case without knowing that the hellhounds are off their leash and will attack anyone they come across, he is going to get torn to pieces. Dean and David are lucky, if there even is such a thing. The hunter is as stuck as she is, and the hellhounds might have caught up with the only Cleveland survivor; the kid could be dead for all she knows.

She adjusts her leg a little, carefully testing its mobility. The swelling is starting to pull at her skin, so she props her foot up again on the plastic first aid briefcase, watching Dean in the meantime. He has crouched down by the backpack he was carrying and mutters a few curse words under his breath while rummaging through it.

“What are you looking for?” Zoë wonders. “The kid packed a satellite phone,” he says, giving up his search, recalling that the zipper of the backpack wasn’t entirely closed when he took it off earlier. “Shit, I must have dropped it outside.”

Annoyed with the rookie mistake, Dean gets up and walks over to one of the windows. There he listens carefully, but he can’t detect any sign of the hounds. No growl, no nothing; it’s almost too quiet. Ready to pick up any sign of movement, the hunter scans the area outside, but there’s nothing living nor dead to be seen. Then he spots the black device in the snow, just a yard away from the cabin. “I see it.”

“So what? It’s not like you can go out there.” Zoë pushes herself up on the edge of the table, careful not to put any pressure on her injured leg. Leaning against the pillar, she follows Dean’s fixed gaze. Without hesitation, the either fearless or oblivious hunter intends to go out, his hand already reaching for the iron latch. “Dean! Are you fucking nuts?!” Zoë calls out, dazed. “And you call me suicidal?” “We need that phone, Zo,” he reminds her, his hand still on the handle. “Do you have altitude sickness or something?!” The wounded huntress steps forward, her leg almost buckling, but Dean’s fast reflexes prevent her from hitting the floor. “What are you doing? You shouldn’t even be standing up,” he scolds, steadying her. “What am I doing?! If you go out there, those motherfuckers will rip you to shreds!” she argues, smacking his hand away. “Yeah, and if we don’t contact Sam, he will!” he reminds her as he hands the shotgun to his current hunting partner, his green eyes intense. “I haven’t seen them yet. If they are still focused on you, they might not attack me.” She meets him with the same fire in her eyes, keeping a tight grip on his biceps before he does something stupid. “And what if they do?” “You’ll back me up,” he says, trusting her. “Okay?”

Zoë stares at him for a couple of seconds, but then sighs, realizing that he makes a good point. If they are not able to reach his brother before he gets here, he will sign his death warrant the second he sets foot on the mountain. Reluctantly, she lets go of his arm and takes the gun, holding the action release button before she pumps the slide to force the shells into the chambers. “Okay.”

He nods and turns away from her, glancing at the black and white world outside. Nervously, he takes a breath, collecting himself before he steps into the wolves den; here goes nothing.

The latch unlocks and the door opens. Careful not to break the line of goofer dust, Dean steps onto the porch and looks back for a second, sharing one last look with the huntress, then descends down the stairs.

It’s eerie how quiet the forest is. At midnight, the trees stopped whispering in the wind and even now he could still hear a penny drop. Even through his boots, the snow feels cold as he walks on it, highly aware of the crunching sound with every footprint the hunter leaves. Dean isn’t anxious often. But right now, being as exposed as he is, it ambushes him. Alert, he bridges the few yards between himself and the phone, trying to be as stealthy as possible. He ducks to pick it up, when he hears it; a deep, low growl.

“Oh, fuck,” Zoë whimpers, staring past the hunter wide-eyes.

Slowly, Dean looks up into a pair of red eyes which light up in the darkness of the woods. It approaches him like a predator sneaking up on his prey, its head hanging low between its shoulders, every motion calculated. While Dean stares straight into the hypnotizing fiery orbs that seem to be portals to the afterworld downstairs, the wind picks up and begins to circle around the cabin. Zoë is shocked when she notices that the goofer dust at her feet is blown off the threshold; there goes their last line of defense. A shiver of both fear and the cold has her trembling as she holds up the shotgun, peering over the double barrel. The beast in the shadow inches closer to Dean, until the moonlight falls on the creature, revealing its true form.

“Hey - uh, Zo?” Dean asks without moving a muscle. “These hellhounds, do they look like bear-sized monster mutts with hellfire burning in their eyes?” Zoë inhales sharply, lifting her cheek from the stock of her weapon. Shit. He can see it. He can see the fucking hellhound. Realizing that Dean is a split second away from being torn apart, she swallows apprehensively, steadying her rifle in order to fire.

The hunter’s hand hovers over the essential device in the snow as he tries to form a plan of action, but he’s captivated by the bone-chilling creature before him. He has never seen anything animal-like so evil as what is standing before the hunter. It’s an absolute monster, about the size of an Irish wolfhound. It looks like one too, but its dark fur is anything but soft and cuddly. The hair on the back of the creature stands straight up, like splinters of obsidian. The beast growls, fixed on its target, showing its razor-sharp teeth, blood dripping from its mouth.

Dean stares back, contemplating his next move. Frozen to the ground, he holds his breath, aware that any sudden movement will trigger Hell’s watchdog to charge him. The hunter sets his jaw, never breaking away from the definition of Death before him, until movement in the black shades surrounding him draws his attention. A second pair of eyes appears, then a third, and a fourth. Within seconds he can count a total of six hounds.

He exhales with a shudder. I am so fucked.

Who is going to make the first move? Dean knows it has to be him, because if he gives the evil creatures only a fraction of a head’s start, he’s going to end up with a lot of stitches, and that’s only if he’s lucky. Bracing himself and gathering his courage, Dean takes a breath and counts down. 3… 2… 1…

Lightning fast, he snatches the phone from the snow and dashes back for the cabin. As fast as his legs can take him, he sprints to safety, but he can hear the beast that was closest to him lunge itself at its victim.

“Get down!!!” It’s Zoë’s high-pitched voice that cuts through the night air. He takes her cue and dives for the ground, rolling on his side. A mistake, because the vision of the hellhound coming towards him with tremendous speed is one that will surely leave him with a nightmare or two if he survives this.

Right before the supernatural being is about to release its fury, the creature is shot out of the air and squeals like a pup. Knowing he can’t afford to lose a second, Dean gets on his feet and rushes towards the porch. He registers the comforting sound of a shotgun reloading before another loud bang echoes through the valley. Almost there, Dean.

But instead of just one hellhound, a whole bunch of them arise from the shadows now. Zoë’s eyes widen; there’s no way she can handle them all. She lowers her rifle and backs out. She doesn’t have a choice, there is no other way. What she’s about to do isn’t like anything she tried before, but it’s their only shot of staying alive.

As Dean stumbles in, the shotgun clatters against the floor. He turns around to close the only barrier between them, horrified when he witnesses the first two creatures already within inches of the threshold; they’re not going to keep them out of the cabin. But before the hunter can blink, the door slams closed with unmeasurable speed and power without anyone touching it, cutting off the creatures outside. Barking like mad, they march against the wood like a battering ram, clawing to get inside.

Unable to process the unexpected scene that plays out in front of him, Dean snaps his head towards his hunting partner, watching in shock how the woman has her right hand heaved up in front of her, fingers spread out and shaking. Her eyes are firmly closed, respiration fast and frantic. Holy fucking shit, this is her doing, Dean realizes. Whatever energy she’s sending towards the door, works because the dogs can’t get through.

“Dean, the goofer dust!” she exclaims over the sound of barking and growling, needing every ounce of her power to keep the barrier closed. Zoë’s order brings him back, time speeding up again. He grabs the bag and quickly lays out a line on the doorstep. As soon as he has connected one side of the doorframe with the other, the pressure on the door drops as if someone flipped a switch. Out of breath, Zoë lowers her hand and opens her eyes as an almost unbearable headache comes to the huntress. Trying to cast it out, she pinches the bridge of her nose while fresh blood drips down from her nostrils. For a moment, she feels like she is going to pass out, but then the pain begins to fade to a level she can cope with. Whoa, that was intense.

She didn’t think she could do it, but she did. Making a whiskey bottle fall off a shelf in Beetle’s Bar is one thing, talking to Sam only using her mind is another, but this was a whole new experience. Of course, she has practiced her telekinesis, but never before has she used it on a supernatural creature. She’s getting better, or worse - depending on how she looks at it.

Dean, who can’t believe what he just saw, stares at her, his jaw slightly dropped and eyes wide. When Zoë glances aside, he knows she can see the indignation in his glare, detest even. He always assumed there was more to the huntress they crossed paths with only recently, but never once did he expect this. Who - or what - is standing before him, is anything but human.

“Christo!” he shouts. “I’m not a demon,” she assures. “Then what the hell are you?” he asks, his upper lip twitching with a hint of hatred. What. He asked her what she is. Not who, but what. Zoë swallows with difficulty as she collects the courage to speak again, hurt by his choice of words. “I’m human,” she tries to assure him, her voice breaking. “Dean, it’s me.”

She steps closer, but Dean quickly draws his Colt M1911 from behind his waistband. Alarmed and cautious, she moves both her hands up as a gesture of surrender. “Easy, tiger.” “Leave her the fuck alone,” Dean sneers, convinced a demon is possessing his hunting partner. “Would you drop it already?! You just yelled ‘Christo’ at me. Here, I can say it myself! Now if I was a demon, that would be a fucking awesome trick, wouldn’t it?” she fires back. “Shut up,” Dean mutters, starting to doubt himself, yet unable to take his finger off the trigger.

“It’s all mighty fine that I’m staring down the barrel, but a bullet won’t kill a demon. It will kill me, though,” she brings to mind, pointing at her chest. “A human is not supposed to be able to do that kind of freaky shit!” Dean exclaims firmly, still aiming the .45 caliber at her. “Neither is Sam, but I don’t see you pointing a gun at him!” she returns.

He swallows apprehensively, brought out of balance by her rapid reply. He hates to admit it, but it’s a valid comparison, one that scares him. Because if he’s able to keep Zoë at gunpoint, what does that say about how abnormal his brother’s abilities are? “Do you want to soak me in holy water if that makes you feel better? Fine, be my guest,” Zoë offers, waving her hands to the side.

But Dean already lowers his Colt M1911 and flips the safety on, the engravings in the metal catching the light from the fire as he tucks it behind his waistband again. The hunter looks away, aghast, the mixture of doubt and distress that he’s experiencing throwing him off. Unsettled, he peers outside, but the hellhounds have disappeared. He thought he understood Zoë’s fear for these things, but now that he actually can see them, he’s experiencing that same anxiety. His heart is racing so severely he can feel it beating in his chest, and his breathing does not seem to slow down either. Almost dying is something he has gotten used to over the years, but almost going to Hell is a new one.

“You okay?” Zoë checks, noticing his weariness. “Yeah, I’m okay,” he claims, annoyed by the fact that he isn’t. He starts pacing through the cabin slowly, keeping a sharp eye on the door. But it’s not just the creatures he keeps an eye on, he can’t help but monitor Zoë too. He huffs almost unnoticeable. You fucking idiot, you thought you had her figured. There’s a whole lot more to Zoë Sullivan than she shows, that’s for sure.

“It’s a good thing we’ll be stuck up here for a while, because it’s about damn time you start talking,” he makes clear, done playing catch-up. The woman across from him wipes her bloody nose with the back of her hand before she suggests otherwise. “We better make that call first.”

Dean knows she’s avoiding the subject, but she has a point; he needs to reach out to his brother. He picks up the satellite phone and inserts the country code and Sam’s cell number, but before he presses the green button, he hesitates. He knows Sam. He knows his stubborn pain in the ass little brother; there is no way he is gonna talk to him after their fight. As soon as he will hear Dean’s voice, he will hang up, yet the one person he has been wanting to talk for days, is sitting right across from him. He hands Zoë the phone. “You call him.”

Thank you so much for reading. I appreciate every single one of you, but if you do want to give me some extra love, you are free to reblog my work or buy me coffee (Link in bio at the top of the page)

Read part eight here

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laufire · 4 years

Text

Supernatural s3

It’s so unfair that the season that has Ruby AND Bela is so short :(((. I was done with it waaaay too quickly, and now I’m speed running through s4 xD (which, like the first time around, is Strong Mixed Feelings territory).

-My girl Ruby!!!! I was so happy to have her back, I kept grinning like a loon every time she was on screen. It’s quite interesting watching the 1.0 and 2.0 versions so close to each other, instead of as they air. I have... Thoughts, on whether Ruby as a double agent was something planned or that they decided as they went, but that’s for the s4 post. s3!Ruby really doesn’t come across as one (“I don’t believe in the devil” oh I wish sometimes xD, I love my nonbelievers), imo, but the beauty of such a device is that you can rationalize anything she does as devious if you want to xD

And it goes without saying that I love her interactions with Sam. THIS SHIP ISTG. I love how immediately ~attuned to her he is lol, his present and instinctive concern for her even if he tries to mask his interest as “practical”. And all the repeated times Sam’s conflicted between her and Dean -like when he deviates Dean shot (wasting one of the Colt’s bullets lmfao) or during the argument about the virgin sacrifice xD. And the “that’s my boy”/ “little fallen angel on your shoulder” quotes!!! Ruby 1.0 deserved to be railed by Sam too, smh.

My favourite episode of hers is “Jus in Bello” (which would be my fave of the season just by virtue of having both Bela and Ruby in the same episode lol. Not interacting, of course, the world as we know it wouldn’t have survived). I just love that she gets that final moment of I TOLD YOU SO to the brothers xD. I really like how she expands on the demonic lore of the show- I love, LOVE the detail about how all demons used to be humans, how they’re souls corrupted in hell. And that in her past life she was a witch (there was this really good fic in Spanish fandom about it... I need to hunt it down).

BTW, though I think her interactions with Dean in that episode are interesting, it really hammers home how much I hate him sometimes xD. Can you stop saying misogynistic slurs for TWO GODDAMN MINUTES, DEAN (and as we know from as early as this season, only HE can have demon/monster friends!! What a fucking hypocrite xD). I freaking love the moment in the finale when she viciously yells him about how she wishes she could see him in hell lmao (and how it foreshadows that when she shows sympathy later, it’s actually Lilith in disguise lmfao). I hate Dean gets the last word in their dynamic, tbqh. Until the s15 cameo, at least xDD

One thing that’s been bothering me xD: the French fries. Demons are vulnerable to salt, like other spirits, right? (and hey, look what a nice piece of foreshadowing that was). How does that translate to food lol. Because Ruby adores French fries, and they obviously contain salt. It’s like spicy food for humans? Or like pineapple? Inquiring minds etc. xD

-I still cannot believe Bela Talbot was only on the show for six episodes lmao. Her presence still lingers in the watchers’ heads so much?? Which is understandable because she’s Lead Girl Material if there was ever any lol. The care with which they styled her even?? You don’t do that for just any character lmao (I mean, just look at most of SPN’s female characters for comparison xD).

Her ship with Dean could’ve really been something, too -even if I hate Dean in it, I can’t deny it packs a punch, narrative-wise. I mean, the Batcat undertones alone!! The fake married undercover shenanigans!! And I think it’s really interesting that she’s such a blind spot for him; Dean’s unusually intuitive about people, but with Bela he takes everything at face value and she can fool him like no other (while, OTOH, is Sam who questions her facade and wants to see more). If he hadn’t been such an idiot (and such an asshole) he could’ve had a really powerful ship. Sucks to be him lol.

Anyway. Man, I love her. So much. I love how Gordon’s threats to kill her don’t work on her, and I love that the show basically said “Bela killing her abusive parents is good, actually” (I’m so tired of forgiveness narratives, you guys. This entire show is founded on revenge, so let me get my revenge fantasies in peace!!) xDD. And I love, LOVE that she withheld that truth from Dean, that she decided he wasn’t worth it. OTOH, you know, fuck the fans that got her written out, definitely; but on the other, I do love how her story ended (and that it was a clear "fuck you" to shitty fans). Doesn’t stop me for wanting to read and re-read (and maybe write!) even more “Bela escapes hell” fix-its, but still.

Also, very important question: what happened to her cat?? It’s the cat alright?? I’m going to headcanon that she left them with that cougar friend of hers lol.

-So. THE DEAL. Okay. Oof. I love this storyline, a lot. A loooot. I love the conflict it creates between the brothers (as long as there’s still conflict and Sam hasn’t yet started taking everything lying down I can enjoy that part of their narrative lol). I love Dean’s initial forced giddiness about “making the most out of his last year” and I love the moment Dean decides he does want to try to live because it makes the last few episodes all the most desperate and cruel (and hey, I’ve heard he only went to hell because the season was cut short due to a writers’ strike... if that’s true that’s so funny lmao).

My absolutely favourite part however? That you can FEEL Dean’s unvoiced resentment towards Sam. For Dean having to die for him, even if Sam never asked him to. He lashes out to Sam repeatedly through the season, but it really came to ahead in the dreamspace episode, where Dean confronts another version of himself that talks about how Sam was “dotted on” (the revisionism asldfkaf). This show is absolutely ruthless when it comes to showing you its characters’ ugly, unfair reactions to things and it’s my favourite thing evah.

Speaking of the dreamspace episode, OMFG. I loved both brothers there. Dean’s hallucination, seeing himself as a demon? And how he let out his anger about John?? Beautiful, truly (regarding John, I also loved their different reactions when it looked like his spirit had contacted them: Dean jumping on it and Sam detached skepticism). But my favourite part has to be when Sam uses the villain’s abusive father against him. Like. Damn. That was cold-blooded o.0

The second-to-last episode, when Sam tracked down that Frankenstein doctor to try and make Dean immortal was ABSOLUTELY HORRIFYING OMG. I loved that. I love that Sam wanted to use it for both them. It was some scary shit. I also love the scene where the crossroads demon questions whether Sam really wants to break the deal, I’m gathering it’s going to be nice foreshadowing later on in the show lol.

Anyway. I also found Dean’s death scene more impactful than Sam’s. Partially because of the horror of it, but mostly because I think at this type of scenes, Padalecki is better. Sam’s grief felt more real, Dean’s got me out of the scene (it’s the voice, I think. Sometimes Ackles’ voice takes me out of scenes, it sounds... forced).

I also really enjoyed how the time loop episode wrapped around this subplot. It managed to be both heartbreaking and mind-numbly hilarious lmfao. Like?? All the deaths?? Were so pathetic?? I tip my hat to Ackles because I don’t think most actors could carry plots like this half as well lmfao.

Sidenote, it’s always a trip to see The Trickster God knowing that fucker is Gabriel. Archangel “hey Mary do you accept God knocking you up” Gabriel. Which I guess isn’t exactly a thing in this show?? Since according to the wikia SPN Jesus was “just a man” (and let me tell you, I’m tickled pink by the fact that out of ALL mythological figures, specifically all CHRISTIAN mythological figures, the show decided to go “nah” on Jesus Christ. I mean, I guess he’d take away from Dean’s, Sam’s and Castiel’s resurrection narratives, but still. It’s so funny!!).

-Gordon Walker remains a superbly acted and fascinating character with extra racist nonsense alsdkfjasdf. But I can’t deny I loved seeing him as a vampire. He was terrifying. And I’m definitely shipping him with Kubrick, ouch xD

-The Ghostfacers episode is... something. As in, incredibly exploitative and homophobic and with an egregious case of BYG (and the first where I’d say it’s incontestable to claim the trope was used. s1 and s2 are muddy territory given the circumstances, IMO, but this one is 300% BYG), but so successfully manipulative my heart hurt for Corbett and Corbett x Ed still. Fuck them for that ngl. I do still enjoy how anti-Winchesters they all are though xD

-3x01 introduces the one nice marriage of hunters so far, between a black couple. The man dies in a gross, horrifying way within the episode ofc (because he was Mean to the the brothers duh). She makes it out alive, and since she doesn’t reappear in the show she gets to live. So for now black women have a sliiiiiightly better track record in SPN than track guys there: they get to appear in a few more episodes and be more fleshed out (Victor, Gordon), but as long as they’re only in one episode they get to live!! (Cassie, Tamara).

-Rufus and Bobby are exes, right? Right?? Probably still married in some state? You know that post about how when gay marriage was legalized across the USA there were a lot of issues because some couples had split and never bothered to divorce, since it was only legal in one place? That post was made for them. Pity Rufus is a black man, and as such has a limited number of allowed appearances before he’s killed off ¬¬

-I would’ve enjoyed Dean’s moments with Lisa and Ben more (it’s just so RIGHT that in this moment he’d want Ben to be his) if my knowledge of future spoilers didn’t perpetually have me in a state of “pls keep this guy away from kids” lol.

-They had Harmony’s actress (BTVS) and they made her a vampire!! The show’s hard on for the Buffyverse is a bit of a hit and miss but I can’t say I don’t relate xDD.

-I know Jensen Ackles can sing (in fact thanks to youtube I know a few of the actors can... is there a musical episode. Does this show have its own OMWF. I need to know). So why. WHY. Does he sound like that during “Dead or Alive”??? I actually like the scene but he sounds so off-key lmao.

-BTW, I found out that apparently Katie Cassidy and Lauren Cohan originally auditioned for each other’s roles añslkdfjasf. I can’t picture it. Ruby 1.0 is Ruby 1.0 and Bela is Bela xD. Although I’ve seen each playing roles that could meld with the other, just. Nope. Good choice on the casting there lol.

#talking to the void #my thoughts #spn thoughts #supernatural #spnruby #samruby #bela talbot #deanbela #deanruby #sam winchester #dean winchester #gordon walker #ruby 1.0 #spn gabriel #ghostfacers #alan corbett #bobby x rufus #spn s3 #the winchesters get to have a tag I GUESS

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mpregemiledurkheim · 3 years

Note

2, 11, 59 & 63

i don't know why i reblogged that ask meme right before a weekend when i knew i would be busy. thank you.

2. when do you think the climax of the show is?

okay rem wrote this list and i know they're in the opinion that 4.22 lucifer rising is the climax of the show with everything else as falling action. i agree, and i don't know if i could refute it. 5.22 concluded the story, and every apocalypse after that comes from cleaning up the messes made after the apocalypse was started, then thwarted (and then the messes made from cleaning up messes, and so on).

(i will add that one thing that frustrates me in the later seasons is how messy the storytelling is, and how little structure there is to it? like michael feels like he's going to be the big bad in season 14 but he gets killed after the mid-season finale, and before the season finale. and it's not like breaking away from the regular tv format does anything groundbreaking in this case. anyways please stick to one villain per season, it'll really focus your story telling.)

11. do you have any favourite writers? do you have any least favourite writers?

i really don't pay attention to the writers at all. buckleming write bad TV though. although i have a good memory of the slice girls.

59. should have cas have forgiven dean in season 15?

i mean sure, it could say something interesting about cycles of abuse and how castiel never really learnt free will, he just learnt how to follow someone else's orders. the writers were just interested in making us suck dean's dick though so i don't care either way.

63. ideal supernatural ending if only changing the last couple of episodes, or going off the full canon?

i mean i would've really liked an ending where there ended up being no god, but i think it would require more changes in season 15 to make that work. by season 15 i just want an ending where i know sam's going to be okay. so my ideal ending isn't different it's basically 15.18 through 20 if they weren't supbar TV.

billie's plan of killing everyone who'd come back to life wasn't necessarily evil, but if we want the protagonists to survive, let's say she was just aiming for no more resurrections, or at least no more chuck, and she wanted the winchesters' help. then from the beginning she would've wanted to turn jack into a power vacuum. then jack eats god's powers, and he, amara and billie watch over the world. imo the empty should be an extension of the darkness, so i think amara could solve the problem of it being loud. castiel goes off to rebuild heaven i guess. 15.19 was a clusterfuck episode so i'm ignoring most of it.

i liked the concept of 15.20, but i think i would've liked it better if it was split in two? the first half is a good bare bones motw, which ends with dean being deadly wounded, and we see sam realize he's not going to make it. dean's speech is at the beginning of the next part. we see him get to heaven, and we see sam begin to decide what his next steps are going to be (building the pyre, maybe talking to a friend, taking the hunt), but we don't see the montage with his son. jack and cas can't be there because i need him to be deeply grieving & with the blankest slate possible ahead of him. i'd end it with him leaving the bunker but we can have the heaven reunion scene for people who care about the brothers or whatever.

#asks #long post #thanks again!

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verobatto · 4 years

Text

Destiel Chronicles

Vol. LXIX

It was a love story from the very beginning.

I Want You Back (Part II)

(11x16b/11x17)

Hello there! Finally finishing the second part of this meta.

It will focus on the parallel between the entity from the 'Safe House' episode and Amara it’s suggesting. Afterwards we will talk about one of the episodes that were discussed more controversially among us Destiel shippers, I'm talking about 'Red Meat', and I will show you step by step that it is, indeed, a very Destiel one.

Thanks to @destielle for beta-ing this one! She's amazing. Thank you girl! 😘💝

Soul Eater

Let's talk about that haunting parallel I just mentioned.

If you check episode 11x16, there is this entity from that house that ate souls.

RUFUS: A Soul Eater? What the hell is that?

BOBBY: Undead creature that feeds on souls. Hence the name. They exist in a place between our world and… another. Soul Eater moves into a house, and once it does, it makes what the lore refers to as a ‘nest’.

RUFUS: A place that exists outside of time and space.

SAM:The nest looks and feels like whatever house the Soul Eater is in.

The creature created a fake house, like a reflection in the mirror. It’s a fake home in which the entity shows people the souls of the ones they love in different and terrible situations (dead) to keep them under it's dominium. From the moment the seal was broken, the creature attacked again.

SAM: Apparently, the nest messes with their victim's head, shows them things they love, parts of their soul in distress, it keeps the victim's soul vulnerable.

So we have a broken seal, a powerful creature eating souls, a fake reality to keep them dominated, right?

And Bobby saying that he could feel the evil in that dimension…

I think we have the perfect description of Amara here, Dean and Sam broke the sigil, Cain's Mark, and she was released, she eats souls, just like the Soul Eater, creating a fake happiness/reality to dominate the victims/Dean.

Again the writers are showing us that Amara is evil, her dominance over Dean is established through fear.

I think it’s vital to mention that between all the books Rufus and Bobby were reading, there was one with the title "Fallen Angel", it make us recall Castiel and Lucifer with the particularity that they're sharing vessels at that moment. Two fallen angels: one fell due to love and the other due to hate.

Another interesting visual narrative that acted as a foreshadowing, was the soul eater placing a hand on Dean's chest in the same way Rowena will place her hand on him in the last episode of the season where he’ll become a soul bomb.

And now, pay close attention to the following scene, because it’s connected to the next episode (Red Meat).

RUFUS: What'd you see, Bobby?

BOBBY: My boys. Both of 'em. Both of 'em dead. And I saw… well I don't know what the hell I saw.

And…

SAM: Hey, you said the Soul Eater made you see things. Plural. So… what else did you see?

DEAN: I saw you. Dead on the floor.

This was a foreshadowing of Sam laying dead on the floor (well he won’t die, but almost) in the next episode. But it’s A BLATANT MIRROR. BOBBY SEEING HIS SONS DEAD ON THE FLOOR. AND IT’S REFLECTING PURELY FAMILIAL LOVE. A father and his two children who are brothers.

FAMILY LOVE, there's no hint of ROMANTIC LOVE in here, no Wincest! Bobby was actively chosen to pose as the mirror. The writers easily could have used a couple with the husband seeing his wife laying dead on the floor, right? But it was BOBBY who saw his boys on the floor, just like Dean saw his brother. It’s about Family!

Sorry I'm a little bossy here, but I need you to understand this point before jumping to the next one.

Using Logic

Let's analyze episode 11x17 with logical facts…

The mentioning of Castiel at the beginning of the episode is there to remind us that Dean is feeling miserable because they couldn't rescue him yet. And he is not sleeping because of that. Sam is trying to comfort him by saying that they’ll get him back.

The episode introduced Corbin and Michelle, a newly-wed couple very much in love.

Corbin would do anything to protect Michelle (Dean mirror) and he is the one becoming a monster (werewolf), so he’s acting as our Castiel's mirror here.

Sam gets shot, and he has a very bad wound. We have Corbin trying to kill him, because he would do anything to save Michelle, even if that implies making a bad decision.

Now, we have Dean thinking his brother is dead. But keep in mind that WHEN HE ENTERS THE ROOM SAM IS ALREADY DEAD (in Dean’s eyes at leat). So DEAN DIDN'T SEE HIS BROTHER DIE. HE FOUND HIM DEAD, LAYING ON THE FLOOR. (First fact).

Then this… he asks Michelle to assist him in his try to contact Death… but … he also says this ..

Dean: Okay. After I do this, go get the doc and tell her to, um... Tell her to bring me back, if she can. If not... no hard feelings, okay?

He is not suicidal here, THIS IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT TO EPISODE 13X05 WHEN HE WANTED TO DIE, NOT WANTING TO LIVE BECAUSE CAS WASN'T ANYMORE. Even knowing Sam was dead, Dean wanted to live. GIVING YOUR LIFE FOR YOUR BROTHER DOESN'T COUNT AS A SUICIDAL THOUGHT, BUT INSTEAD AS SOMETHING ANYONE WOULD DO FOR THEIR BROTHER, especially when that brother is your little brother you raised yourself like a father. (Second Fact).

Dean wants to be alive because he needs to rescue Cas.

Billie: That's what I thought. It's cute, though. You pretending you're trying to save Sam for the greater good, when we both know you're doing it for you. You can't lose him. But even if Sammy could win the title bout... the answer would still be “no.” The answer will always be “no.” Game's over, Dean. No more second chances. No more extra lives. Time to say bye-bye to Luigi, Mario.

This sums up perfectly how Dean feels about Sammy. He raised him, he always took care of him. He can't lose him because all his life revolved around Sam. This is not Wincest, this is solely FAMILY LOVE. Remember what we said about Bobby a little earlier, these were Bobby's feelings too.

I will put here an addition from Destielle, she talked about the well known toxic codependency, and i think is important too:

"Billie basically calls out the toxic codependency between Sam and Dean here. ‘You’re doing it for you’ she deadpans. It’s more about Dean fulfilling the task, or rather duty, John gave him so early on, that it’s part of Dean’s personality. An automatism. He doesn’t want Sam to live because it was Sam’s wish, but because Dean needs Sam to keep things the way they always have been as so not having to deal with himself."

Is interesting because John Winchester heritage to Dean was the GUILT and the FIRST BORN duty, so practically, he keeps reacting and acting like a soldier that needs to protect the little brother and the entire world, I talked so many times in My metas about this toxic heritage and about THE BIG PROTECTOR living inside Dean. Interesting comment my friend! Thank you!

Dean’s spirit [sadness and desperation in his eyes]: I'm asking you... I'm begging you, please. Bring him back. Bring him back and take me instead.

DEAN WINCHESTER WILL ALWAYS GIVE HIS LIFE IN EXCHANGE FOR THE ONES HE LOVES BECAUSE HE IS DEAN WINCHESTER. NOT JUST FOR SAM, BUT FOR THE WORLD, AND CAS.

Billie: I'm not here to bargain with you, kid. I'm here to reap you. And the kicker is... Sam's not dead. [Dean looks stunned] But you are. Or will be, soon enough.

Now… let's go with Michelle and Dean's conversation… the third fact:

Dean: Michelle, this is gonna be very hard. But you will be okay. And, eventually... eventually you'll get back to normal.

Dean is talking from experience. Drawn from every time he lost a friend, a family member (including Sam) which he always affronted in the same way, by hunting, drinking heavily and stuffing bacon in his face. It always was hard at first but got better with time until he got back to normal. He's talking with determination because he lost a lot of beloved people. But … he hasn’t lost the love of his life yet… Michelle did…

Gif set credit @thejabberwock 👇

Michelle [sighing]: No, I won't. They said I could leave... [she sighs] an hour ago. But... where am I even supposed to go? After everything we survived together... [turning back to Dean] I watched the man I love die. There's no normal after that.

This is a rich piece of text over there. First of all, she's convincing Dean she won't be back to normal. Ever. She's the one talking with authority now, because she's talking from her experience of losing the love of her life… 'where am I even supposed to go?' SHE'S LOST, Just as lost as Dean will be for the first 5 episodes from season 13. 'After everything we survived together…' these words are carving deep into Dean's heart, because the man he loves is in danger in the very moment, and I know he's recalling everything they survived together. 'I watched the man I love die, there's no normal after that', Dean's face is priceless here, full of fear, he doesn't want to go through the same Michelle has and had to. He doesn't want to watch Cas die. And I want you to remember the first fact I pointed out, MICHELLE IS SAYING SHE WATCHED CORBIN DIE, not that she found him dead. Okay? So we are not talking about a reference to the death of Sam here. Dean didn't watch him die, he found him dead. And secondly, Dean knows Sam is okay by now, so why would he display a face full of pain and fear? Who's the one in real danger now, possessed by Lucifer? CASTIEL. DEAN DOESN'T WANT TO SEE CASTIEL DIE. HENCE THE TERRIFIED EXPRESSION.

AND THAT'S WHY IN THE NEXT EPISODE HE WILL FIGHT AGAINST RATIO, AGAINST WHAT’S THE LOGICAL THING TO DO, JUST BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO SEE THE MAN HE LOVES DIE. Sorry for the yelling. But I needed to make things clear.

To Conclude:

The Soul Eater in episode 11x16 is a blatant mirror of Amara. Another way to show us her dominance over Dean is a forced and dark one.

Episode 11x17 must be analyzed with logic. The clues are in the details and related to the previous episode in which Bobby saw Sam and Dean dead. It was purely about FAMILIAL LOVE and it must not be mistaken for something else because that just would be a twisted interpretation.

Dean giving his life in exchange for the one of EVERYONE shouldn't be mistaken for suicidal tendencies, too.

The fact that he wanted to go on with his life EVEN THOUGH BEING CONVINCED SAM IS DEAD is an important difference to how Dean is behaving in 13x05.

We have the foreshadowing for Castiel's death and Mourning!Dean and a prelude to 11x18 where we’ll have a very desperate Dean trying to save his angel.

Hope you liked this one! See you in the next meta!

Tagging @metafest @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-is--endgame @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73 @justmeand-myinsight @idontwantpeopletoknowmyname @tenshilover20 @teddybeardoctor @pepevons @helevetica @isthisdestiel @dizzypinwheel @jawnlockwinchester @horsez2 @qanelyytha

@imjustkipping @destielle @agusvedder @spnsmile @shippsblog @robot-feels @superlock-in-the-tardis

If you want to be added or removed from this list just let me know.

If you want to read the previous metas From s11, her you have the links.

Vol. LXII, XLIII, XLIV, LXV, LXVI, LXVII, LXVIII

Buenos Aires July 7th 2020 5:36 PM

#destiel #destiel chronicles #destiel meta #supernatural meta #season 11 meta #vol XLIX

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nellie-elizabeth · 4 years

Text

Supernatural: Despair (15x18)

I'm having an out of body experience, I cannot believe this. Last night was legitimately one of the weirdest nights of my life, and not just because of *gestures broadly* but also because of *gestures broadly* and myriad other small but still totally bizarre personal things coming at me from all angles... strap in, y'all, I've got some shit to say.

Cons:

We're gonna talk about it. Ohhhh, we're gonna talk about it. But let's start with some other shit before we get there.

So... are we ignoring "Dean was willing to let Jack sacrifice himself" or something? Like there was that moment with Sam and Dean where they talked about it, and Dean apologizes for pulling a gun on Sam, and Sam is like "oh it's okay Dean, no worries." But at the beginning of this episode, Dean seems to be just as worried for Jack, and as protective of him, as the others, with absolutely no acknowledgment of what happened in the last episode. This... should have mattered. There should have been some regrouping and some serious talks about this. Seriously.

The Thanos snap thing... guys, when Infinity War did it in 2018, it was kind of fun and shocking and cool, and we knew the deaths wouldn't be permanent but it was still wild to watch our heroes react to such an immense loss and then leave us all in limbo for a year. This... is not that. The sheer tone-deafness of having this episode contain a moment of domesticity for AU!Charlie and her cool egg-making girlfriend Stevie, only to have Stevie vanish... and then to end the episode with the biggest queer-bait/bury your gays moment imaginable... like...

Okay, sorry, no, saving the Destiel thing until I've sorted out the rest of this nonsense. The point is, seems pretty clear that the deaths in this episode (other than Cas') are temporary, and Supernatural already has the biggest power creep problem of any show I've ever seen... they really couldn't think of another way to up the stakes for the ending, other than doing the thing where everyone gets killed? Didn't... Crowley... already do this to them several seasons back? Am I hallucinating? There's nothing new under the sun with this show.

Why does this show introduce things and resolve them in a single episode? Like, big, huge things? We just figured out Death was trying to double-cross them, and now by the end she's dead? This show either limps along and does nothing, or speeds through plot stuff at lightning-speed. These last two episodes were big and dramatic and full of Plot but in a way where it all feels kind of unreal. Pacing issues like whoa.

And speaking of. Ahem. Okay. Let's... let's do this. I have some things about the Destiel scene that I'm going to put in the "pros" section below, and hopefully as you read on you'll understand why it's really hard for me to be black and white about it. If I had to, if I had to determine whether I am "happy" or "sad" or "grateful" or "angry" I'd say... sad and angry, 97%? Like? Let's dive in, here.

Setting aside the larger context, a couple of smaller notes:

Acting-wise, what the fuck was Jensen doing in this scene? Misha was acting his whole heart out and Jensen gave him nothing to play off of. I don't understand how Jensen accidentally played Dean so obviously in love with Cas all this time, and then in this moment, no-homo'd it so fucking hard. Even the stage directions in the script page that was floating around said that Dean didn't reciprocate. That's dumb, like, in a shipping sense it's disappointing, but also... Dean, what was your face doing while Cas gave his whole monologue about how amazing you are? What a great and loving man you are? Even if he hadn't ended the whole thing by saying "I love you" and then dying right in front of your eyes, surely you would have been feeling some kind of way about the whole situation?

Also, the scene was shot so awkwardly, there was too much space between them, and then Cas pushes Dean out of the way and he just sits there on the floor with Pikachu-face while The Empty opens up and takes Death and Cas away, making these weird shocked noises... Supernatural often has awkward pacing when dramatic things are happening in action scenes, where certain people have to stand still like it's not their turn on the initiative order in a D&D fight or something, and this was one of the more embarrassing and awkward examples of that.

Cas' deal with The Empty has not been brought up practically since it happened. Cas has been sidelined as a character a lot this season, the past couple seasons, really, but we had this hanging over our heads, right? When Cas says "I've figured it out, true happiness isn't in having, it's just in saying it", the moment doesn't really work on a character level, because we didn't get to see Cas do any of that figuring out. We didn't know he was curious about his true happiness, we didn't know it was an internal struggle/debate for him, wondering what it could be. A lot of Destiel people wanted it to be Dean confessing his love to Cas, and that being the true happiness... but of course that would never happen in a million years. Others thought it would be "yay we defeated the big evil, we can all be a happy family together," oh snap, I'm too happy, goodbye. Which would have been... weirdly anticlimactic, but at least would have made some level of narrative sense. This idea that telling Dean how he feels would bring Cas peace is... well, it's okay, it's fine in isolation, but there's no buildup to it, no tension to his moment of "realization."

And now to fry some bigger fish...

Let's forget about the fact that we never thought this would happen to begin with. Is it actually... worse that it did? Seriously, queer angel man confesses his love to stoic human man who stands there without making a single expression, and the act of confessing said love, knowing it's not reciprocated, knowing he won't get to be with Dean or even be near him ever again, is enough to make Castiel so truly happy that he's willing to die peacefully and forever, all in the act of saving Dean's life? Is that not... like... textbook homophobia? People toss around "bury your gays" a lot and I think what they're missing is that the trope doesn't automatically apply just because a queer character dies. It means a queer character dies because of their queerness, or they are revealed to be queer but can't get any measure of happiness and then they die immediately. This is textbook that. The act of confessing his GAY LOVE is what KILLED CAS. It's a one-to-one sequence of events. It's not a coincidence that Cas died right after saying this. Saying this is what made him die. That's... appalling. Truly, in a very real sense, it's appalling.

Another thing I haven't seen people talk about much is the manufactured nature of this sacrifice. We just found out Billie was going to turn on them at the end of the last episode. If Cas was going to die in a sacrifice-y way, did it have to happen now when Billie was basically just knocking on the door trying to get at Dean for a last-minute revenge thing, even though Billie was already at death's door? This was so contrived, like, can Cas not whoosh them away to somewhere else? Keep them running until Billie succumbs? I get that it wouldn't have been easy, and maybe Billie could have caught up to them anyway, but my point is, they manufactured this moment to be "the only way" that Dean could survive, making Cas' sacrifice so noble and necessary or whatever... but I was sitting there thinking there's got to be another way. If they'd wanted to write in another way, there could have been. The inevitability felt so very contrived. And, as mentioned, the impact of dying on this show has lost all meaning, so even Billie trying to kill Dean, squeezing his heart in his chest, did absolutely nothing for me. I knew he'd be fine, because there are two more episodes left. And if Cas hadn't been there to do what he did, Dean would still have been fine because he's Dean. Am I making any sense?

We have two more episodes left. I am... fairly confident Misha won't be in those episodes. All context, both within the show and without, points to that. I truly think that after all this time, he gets the only ending in the whole show that's unambiguously unsalvageable and tragic. We have a world where the afterlife exists and people can hang out there, but The Empty is a different beast, and this means Cas is... gone. Permanently. Like, his consciousness no longer exists, he's caput. They could bring him back from The Empty, in fact, they've already done it once... but if they decide not to, that's just... where we leave things, and that's brutal and unnecessarily grim. The other characters, even if we get an end-of-show TPK (which would be STUPID, more on that later), could at least have canon or implied-canon reunions in the afterlife. If we don't see Eileen again, we can get the implied ending of her coming back to life, or Sam dying and joining her in Heaven. Same with Charlie, with Charlie's new girlfriend, with Bobby, with Donna, with every other character that's died along the way, including Mary Winchester and OG Charlie, OG Bobby, whatever you want. The fact that Cas gets this, after everything, is truly the part I'm the most sad about, setting aside love confessions entirely.

So as I said, two more episodes. I'm worried that Cas dying is gonna get swallowed up with everyone dying and not get its due, thus making the confession completely isolated. Like, here you go, gays, have this one scene, which, in isolation is quite heartfelt from Cas' perspective, but can be carefully boxed up and not touched for the last two hours of the show. If they don't want to touch on how this would affect Dean specifically, they don't have to. He can be generally angsty and sad about Cas, but they could get away with never bringing it up again, and that is some grade-A level bullshit right there, my friends. At minimum, Dean needs to tell Sam about this. He probably won't, but he should, if the show has any sense of integrity left in its bones.

Ahem. Like I said, I have... lots of thoughts. More on Destiel later, but let's turn to the "Pros" section and talk about some other aspects of this incredibly crowded episode.

Pros:

Despite my issues with everything that didn't get resolved re: Dean letting Jack die, I did kind of like the "to somehow" scene, because it was a nice little breather for the brothers, it solidified them as being on the same side to the bitter end, that despite all the crazy shit they've been through, that they've put each other through, they'll have this as a bedrock at the end of the day. I'm not a brothers-only sort of fan, at all, in fact, I think a brothers-only ending betrays most of what's beautiful about this show in its good moments. But they are the stars, they are the protagonists, they should be the center of their own story, and I like it when we get check-ins like this, that shows how unshakable they are underneath all the other crap.

Charlie and Stevie... okay, cute that their names are like that, cute that Charlie said: "I liked the way she handled herself" and that's how they got together... eggs are cute, whatever... and if these deaths are impermanent, which... come on... they have to be, I do like that Charlie gets to have a girlfriend and be happy as a hunter and as someone's partner.

I liked the tense car ride with Sam texting Eileen, with Dean, Jack, and Cas all silent in the car with him... that was a nice moment of solidarity, all of them entirely on the same page about being there for Sam and helping Eileen however they could... even knowing the futility. What were they going to do when they got there? That was a great tension-building moment, in isolation, even though the deaths are likely temporary.

Cas and Jack's talk was good, I'll admit I've definitely been won over by Cas and Sam as Jack's dads... Dean too, once upon a time, but dude needs to do some groveling before he gets to be Dad again, seriously. It's nice that in the midst of all the chaos, there was a check-in moment. Jack is the embodiment of a lot of our end-game themes, here. He had a noble destiny to sacrifice himself, and then it fizzled out and didn't work, and now he's just left in the aftermath, not sure what to do with himself. It was important that Cas tell him that Jack is worthy of love and family, even if he's not "useful" in the way he thought he could be. Definitely nice to have that nailed in.

If we're following the Infinity War/Endgame line, the last two episodes will be majority Sam, Dean, and Jack, but at the last moment there will be a way to reverse it, and everyone else will come back in a moment of triumph. But probably not so much Castiel, which... well... see above complaints. The point is, seeing Charlie, Bobby, Donna, Eileen, etc. all burst forth for one final moment of glory could be really cool, if they manage to stick the landing with it. It'll be an incredibly manufactured sense of triumph and nostalgia, but it will probably work on me because it's been... guys, I don't know if you know this, but it's been kind of an emotional year. :)

I will say, working under the assumption that the dead characters will come back, I'm actually oddly... not mad about Donna dying. It was actually a legitimately shocking twist. A rule was set up: if a person had died before and been resurrected, or if a person was from another universe, they could be Thanos snapped by Billie. Makes sense. Sam and Dean are in danger because of all their deaths, Jack and Cas aren't safe for the same reason. Charlie, Bobby, Eileen... sure. But Donna should have been safe, given the parameters we started with.

And then Dean and Cas are confronting Billie, she says she's not killing anyone, we realize it must be Chuck... and then Donna, who isn't from another world, who has never died... GONE. I gasped.

And the hits kept coming... Billie is dying because Dean killed her with that small wound, and didn't even know it. That's another excellent twist. The past two episodes, back to back, have kept me on my toes about who to ultimately be afraid of. Chuck? Billie? The Empty? It's so much better than this slow march to Chuck vs. Sam and Dean that we've been getting all season, even if we do loop around to Chuck again as the final Big Bad.

The Empty is actually quite a complex, interesting idea for a villain, this entity that doesn't get involved in petty squabbles, doesn't have personal vendettas, but actually just wants to sleep and be left alone. Having Meg be the Empty's face here at the end is also a nice touch. I wish we could have had more of this, truthfully, and I'm curious how The Empty will play a role in how things shake out, if at all.

So... I want to go back to something I've been saying these past couple episodes, about how if this show has a grimdark ending, it will be a betrayal of everything they've set up. It will be so stupid that my anger will manifest in yet another round of hysterical giggles. What I suspect is that we'll get something peaceful, something where trauma will linger but people will get to start anew. Maybe Jack creates a new world outside of Chuck's power. Maybe Sam and Dean take over as God and the Darkness, as some people suggested, and Jack is the new Death. Maybe maybe maybe. Bottom line, I could be satisfied with the majority of this ending, and I can even (obliquely, reluctantly) understand that they wanted one final perma-death to really make the stakes feel higher. If they aren't killing off the Winchesters, that leaves Castiel. So what I'm saying in this paragraph is basically that I'm not guaranteed to despise the ending of this show yet. They could still get it right.

God, that sounds pretty bleak, doesn't it?

Before I end this, I want to talk about, as promised, the few Destiel-related points that I'd classify as "pros", albeit with a big asterisk.

First off, Misha clearly found the moment very cathartic, and he pulled out all the stops, and, in isolation, the confession was hella romantic and quite poignant. Without context, just reading these lines? "The one thing I want, it's something I know I can't have" and "because you cared, I cared. I cared about you, I cared about Sam, I cared about Jack, I cared about the whole world because of you..." like, that's some premium content, I won't lie. I also kind of enjoy the idea that Cas finds happiness in saying the words out loud, in being true to who he is. I hate a lot about what happened to Cas here, but if Cas' arc, in its totality, is about embracing humanity, and Dean is the anchor to that, this really does come full circle. He pulled Dean out of Hell, he saved him, he loved him, he'll die for him, and in accepting that love, that human love, he is finally at peace with who he is. Now, mind my comments above, I'm still not happy, but I can see how in one sense, this is narratively poignant. And if others are satisfied with it, I'm happy for them.

(Added bonus, while Jensen's acting was WACK for the majority of that scene, I did like the ending shot, the silence, him not answering Sam's call, crying silently into his hands. That was very nicely shot and acted, I thought.)

Secondly, and this isn't actually praise for the show, it's more a... meta experience? I have to say, the idea that Destiel became sort of canon, but in the most homophobic way possible, in the year 2020, while we're all still waiting for election results to come in is... one of the wildest, most hilarious things to ever have happened to me. I mean it, last night sitting alone in my house I kept cackling loudly to myself, in complete and utter disbelief. I saw Tumblr explode in a way that hasn't happened in years. I was transported back in time nearly a full decade, to the person I was when I started writing these reviews, or even before that, when I was new to Supernatural, new to the whole concept of being truly involved in a fandom.

Here's the thing... I never. Ever. EVER. Thought we would get any sort of textual confirmation. I thought at most, if they went for a happy ending for everyone, we'd get Dean and Cas as hunting partners, and we could all fill in the post-canon gaps. I once told my sister that I'd be happy with a one-sided love confession from Cas to Dean, because that part was practically canon before last night, and in a way, I am happy. I'm happy that this crazy thing actually happened, and if nothing else, all of those clowns can put away their makeup. I was never with them. I never believed, and there's this sliver of me that's happy to have been wrong. It's completely bogus how it happened, but the fact that we live in a reality where it happened is still kind of tripping me out in a major way. So I'm happy, I'm... flabbergasted, but I'm experiencing a very unique, unprecedented soup of emotions this morning and I never would have felt like this if Cas had died with a no homo parting.

And that's the thing, they let it be unambiguously about Dean, not just in that one moment, but all along, and that's really satisfying in a meta narrative sense that when everyone was reading it as "Castiel is in love with Dean," they were... correct. It doesn't really matter when they decided this, in last night's episode they made it crystal-clear that it wasn't a whim, wasn't a recent development, in-universe. This has been Cas' truth from very, very early on, his entire experience since meeting Dean has been shaped by him, he's loved him all this time. That... I don't know, it's absolutely bonkers that this is all we're going to get, but it does mean something, if you want to let it.

Welcome back to 2012, Tumblr. Last night was a wild ride, I won't deny.

I'm giving the episode a bad score, but I just want to say the Destiel scene gets a simultaneous infinity-out-of-ten and also zero-out-of-ten, imploding the multiverse instantly. That's where I'm at, folks. Insert gif of Chidi dropping Peeps into a big pot of chili. I'm gonna go take a nap.

6/10

#review #supernatural #supernatural review #spn #spn 15x18 #destiel #i'm experiencing actual shock #i keep laughing #but like #you know how sometimes people laugh or smile inappropriately at funerals?#it feels like that

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mittensmorgul · 4 years

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When I talk about samwena, someone always says that their relationship is motherly, just like when I talk about destiel, someone always says that they are like brothers. Although I firmly believe that Sam and Rowena's relationship is not motherly, it bothers me that Rowena said "this is my boy" to Sam, because she also talked about Crowley, her son. Do you think this was an attempt by the writers to try to turn samwena into a mother-child relationship?

Aw, hi there! and I’m gonna start this by saying that I have written a lot on the subject, and none of it has seemed to change anyone’s mind, so I don’t know whether writing another long post on the subject will, either.

I’m putting this under a cut because it’s long-ish, and because I don’t need saileen shippers attacking me again... y’all have been warned if you don’t wanna read stuff that isn’t glowingly heart-eye’d about them... bearing in mind that I read all the positive saileen posts and just smile and nod politely at them and then move on with my life while shutting up about it...

(sorry about that... I edited this post for a typo and it seems to have messed up the read more cut...)

For years, we’ve watched the relationship between Sam and Rowena grow slowly, and it reached a point somewhere along the line where I couldn’t ignore the blatant romantic themes. The thing is, for me, their relationship can’t possibly work as her being “motherly” toward him. Because Sam has just as often been the provider of comfort/security to her as she has to him, you know?

I’ve seen a lot of people just flat out reject the read of their relationship as romantic, but I think that’s mostly because folks were clinging to the notion that Eileen was actually still alive. Granted, the fact that she had actually been dead all those years was only confirmed after Rowena’s death, but I think folks were dead set on them picking up their “romantic” relationship (which I don’t even think approached romantic in canon until Sam offered her that parting kiss, but again, that’s just me) and immediately were able to dismiss Rowena with that. Despite the fact that Sam (in canon, again) couldn’t just dismiss Rowena and strike up a relationship with Eileen (even after he verbally, repeatedly confirmed that he and Eileen were “not like that” after Dean’s prodding, a lot of people still only had heart-eyes for the two of them, and I get it, I really do, but I don’t see it, and can’t see it as ever having been romantic in canon before that point).

I personally do not think that Eileen will be back as Sam’s endgame love interest, and never have. I know that comment upsets a lot of people who cannot see a happy endgame for Sam without some sort of relationship with Eileen. But canon literally has not laid the groundwork for that. She could come back, he could call her at the end and suggest they give a relationship a try, but to me it would be just that-- not some Grand Romance that has been years in the making, but the very beginning of what could potentially be a happy life together. And I just find that... disappointing on so many levels. But again, that’s just me. If that’s what the show gives us, I’ll personally be incredibly meh about it.

In 15.03, as Rowena is attempting to convince Sam to kill her, to sacrifice her for the spell that was SUPPOSED to save the world, to finally free them from Chuck’s Final Punishment and heal the rift he opened into Hell, she sacrificed herself believing it would be to save Sam and the world. And the key thing to understand here is that her sacrifice did NOT end Chuck’s game of horrors for them. He was SUPPOSED to have left their world after that, and yet he didn’t. He just kept writing, destroying, and pushing them. Eileen was a pawn in his game. I can’t see her as anything more than that, as far as Sam goes anyway. In fact, her return prompted Sam to spend that entire episode thinking about Rowena, learning he was the only one able to enter Rowena’s home without being cursed by her security system. Had to bear the weight of the fact that he was the one who killed her, even if she basically had to force him to do so... Eileen being resurrected felt like cold comfort, especially when Sam still thought it had been Rowena’s one-time-use spell that had brought her back.

Learning that spell had been planted there by Chuck, after Sam had gone to Rowena’s in search of a crystal to trap Eileen’s soul for an eternity (better than going back to Hell or wandering the earth until she went vengeful), (which is admittedly not a very romantic start to any of this), and then learning that Rowena was first Queen in Hell and then had apparently lost control of the place by the next time Sam and Dean went to seek her help... I mean, the whole notion that Rowena was actually happy there is blown to shreds.

Heck this is getting long, and I already wrote a dissertation on Rowena’s character (too long for tumblr, it’s on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21641770). Somehow every time I start talking about Sam and Rowena’s romantic potential it always devolves into a dissertation on why I can’t see Sam and Eileen as a romantic potential, but that long essay is almost entirely about Rowena herself and has very little to do with shipping at all. I’m not interested in ship wars here. If y’all are happy thinking about Sam and Eileen together, congrats! I’ve written them as a couple in fic! They are cute together! But in canon, there’s no there there...

But back to Rowena, and that final line from 15.03:

ROWENA Hell's closing. The walls are falling. SAM There has to be another way. ROWENA I wish there were... I do. I don't care about anything enough to take my own life. Not you, your brother... not even the world. But I believe in prophecy. I believe in magic. And I'm here, and you're here, and everything we need to end this right is in our hands. [She puts the dagger in Sam’s hands and tries to get him to stab her.] ROWENA I know this in my bones... it has to be this way. Do it! Kill me, Samuel! [Sam hesitates. Rowena puts a hand on his shoulder.] ROWENA I know we've gotten quite fond of each other, haven't we? But will you let the world die, let your brother die, just so I can live? [...] SAM No. [He stabs her, crying. Rowena touches his face.] ROWENA That's my boy. [She twists the dagger where Sam stabbed her. Then, she takes it out.]

(and for every reason why I believe that entire conversation is key to Rowena as a character, again, see that long essay)

Rowena doesn’t do “fond.” She wields flirtations as defensive weapons. She manipulates and shields herself with favors and sensuality. I mean, remember every man she’s had flirtations with-- from the men she’d attempted to con into relationships in order to take them for everything they were worth to flirting with the most powerful being in the room from Chuck right on down to Cas. We know her history, from Crowley’s birth story to how she’d survived for hundreds of years by ingratiating herself to those wealthier and more powerful. Remember those witches in 12.11 who’d basically used her up and dumped her out again. But with Sam? With Sam she’d never made a power play. She’d never aggressively come on to him, never felt the need to assert herself to control him or defend herself from him. He was the only person she’d ever been entirely honest with, about her fears and her concerns.

Sam was the only person, possibly in her entire life, that she trusted fully.

And in return, Sam literally held her life in his hands. Nobody else had the power to kill her, and that is a fuckton of trust to have in someone you will then refer to as “fond of each other.”

I mean, honestly

how is that not romantic?

And yet her final attempt to comfort him after he’s done what she asked of him and has tears streaming down his face is “that’s my boy...”

What was she supposed to do? Kiss him? Knowing she would die and condemn herself to Hell didn’t seem like the right time for anything else... And yet now she is trapped there after a futile sacrifice that failed to save the world.

The look of abject shock on Sam’s face in 15.08 when they find her in Hell is telling. She dismisses him to refill her drink, because I don’t think she could bear that look on his face, and then advises Dean and Cas to fix their own mess. And that, to me, only served to underscore the fact that her own mess remained unfixed, and possibly unfixable at that point, you know? She was still dead, still trapped in Hell because of her own choices. She hadn’t even earned redemption for that sacrifice.

Are we supposed to believe that she’s still condemned to that fate, and that’s just the end of her story in an “oh well, moving on” sort of way just so Sam can have a cute lil fledgling relationship with Eileen (who left, with no immediate intention to return) and forget all about all of that? Nah, no thank you.

There are seven more episodes to air, and one of the major things I personally feel needs to be resolved with Chuck’s imminent dismissal from his creation (because honestly do any of us believe that Chuck won’t be defeated in the end?) is the reorganization of the whole of Heaven and Hell. Something tells me that without Chuck manipulating creation, Heaven and Hell will not survive as they are, and then what would happen to Rowena? I think she’s still important to the story, or at least I hope she is.

It will be interesting to see how this all plays out, and I don’t have any definitive guesses about anything, but to me, this is the only way things can play out happily for Sam, saving Rowena the same way Cas once saved Dean (sorry Saileen shippers, I know Sam “saved” Eileen already, but uh... there’s about 50 asterisks on that where Chuck’s desired story just falls apart all over the place, especially the peek into the future Chuck gave Sam in 15.09).

#samwitch #spn 15.03 #spn 15.06 #spn 15.08 #spn 15.09 #spn 15.13 #spn 12.11 #rowena #Anonymous

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roswelldetails · 4 years

Text

Episode 2x04 - What if God Was One of Us

EPISODE SUMMARY:

AN ACT OF GOD — On the verge of a breakthrough in her quest to save Max (Nathan Dean), Liz (Jeanine Mason) turns to Kyle (Michael Trevino) for one last favor that could potentially land him in hot water. Meanwhile, Michael (Michael Vlamis) and Alex’s (Tyler Blackburn) investigation into Nora (guest star Kayla Ewell) leads them to a farm, where they meet a historian named Forrest (guest star Christian Antidormi). Elsewhere, Cameron (guest star Riley Voelkel) confronts Jesse Manes (Trevor St. John) about her sister’s whereabouts, and Isobel (Lily Cowles) uses her powers for good. Amber Midthunder also stars. Shiri Appleby directed the episode written by Steve Stringer & Christopher Hollier (#204). Original airdate 4/6/2020.

DETAILS:

Roy said that he took veterinary training, which is how he was able to help with Louise and Nora's injuries.

"How come it feels like you don't know what I'm saying, but you know what I'm thinking?"

Roy moved the truck (with the pods in it?) to the livery.

"Boss's wife won't let him blame the drought on God so that honor goes to his foreman -- that's me."

Kyle on The Science:

"You're telling me that Michael Guerin used pinball parts and a car battery to cause cutaneous perfusion?

(Cutaneous perfusion...i think it is circulation of fluid/blood through tissue, but it's a bit above my head)

The device Liz needs is a "Personal Genome Machine". She ordered it when she still worked at the hospital.

Before entering the Crashdown, Graham Green tapes a Missing sign on the door for Hank Gibbons (who Noah killed in 1x13). Apparently someone covered it up.

The sign is HARD to read, but I think it says:

"All viable leads reported to Graham Green's UFO Emporium will receive a free keychain. Make certain you subscribe to the Weekly Probe as we dive deeper into the untold stories of Roswell and answer the question on everyone's mind. ARE YOU NEXT?"

Graham Green references that he's the "creator of last week's 39th most downloaded true crime podcast." (Assuming that this is the Weekly Probe, referenced on the poster).

Graham Green is opening a 1947 themed malt shop at the UFO Emporium

U.F. Doughs (the Crashdown's new donuts).

Isobel's been coming to the Crashdown every day for weeks. (Note that this episode is the first one that really doesn't have a clear time context).

"Feliz cumpleanos, mama!" Happy birthday in Spanish, of course, but note Kyle's choice term of endearment for fic purposes! And she responds in kind "Gracias, mijo!" (Mijo = male version. Arturo calls Liz mija = female version)

"A wild Michael Guerin finally emerges from his weeks-long hibernation in a lab and a library."

Again, non-specific time frame.

"When every other farm was struggling, the Longs experienced record-breaking crops. Summer of '47. No one could explain it…till October '48. The day after that photo ran in the paper, the farm was devastated by a massive fire. Foreman, entire staff killed. Whole place burned down."

"What caused the fire?"

"Well the paper called it an act of God. Said it was a freak storm. Bolt of lightning strikes the barn the same night that my mom's caught and locked up in Caulfield."

Wyatt Long's horses are named "Diamond" and "Silk".

Jesse Manes' beer of choice is "Polestaff".

Cam's postcard from Charlie (Likely the reason she came back to Roswell) says:

"See you back in Roswell --Charlotte"

Top left corner says "Greetings from Roswell, NM".

It was mailed to Jenna at the Green Hill Motel in Dayton, Ohio.

Jenna says it's not Charlie's handwriting.

Isobel in the mindwarp: "And what's your dream, Arturo? What would be your miracle? What do you pray for?"

Arturo & Rosa's fight…

"Did that fool give you drugs? I'll kill him!"

"Ow! You're hurting me! That's child abuse!"

"Everything I do I do to hold you up and you see it as abuse. I don't know what to do anymore!"

"Yeah right." Rosa falls down and laughs.

"This isn't funny! Sheriff Valenti won't give you any more chances."

"You should be happy. You wanted me to be on the field hockey team, remember? You said I should make friends and have good American fun."

"Who sold you the pills?"

"I stole them."

"Was it Frederico?"

"You wouldn't believe me."

"Tell me the truth!"

"It was Mom! She's either too high to notice that they're missing, or she knows and she doesn't care."

"You're lying to me. I don't know how to help you."

"So stop trying then. I'm beyond hope anyway, right? That's what everyone else in this town thinks."

"Maybe you're right. I'm going for a drive."

Arturo tried to register with Instagram as PancakePapi!! He ended up with PancakePapi58!

Scene with Steph and her dad...FIRST MENTION OF SOPAPILLAS ON THE SHOW!!! 🤤🤤🤤🤤 (They're the best...in New Mexican restaurants they're like, both an appetizer and a dessert. They're like hollow fried bread that you eat with honey. Delicious.) See here:

Plus it gave the show another opportunity to be authentically New Mexican through food references. (Last season it was in episode 2 when Arturo asked,"red or green?" And Liz replied "Christmas!". In New Mexico that means half red half green chile smothering her plate.) Like so:

1948...unclear how much time has passed, but Louise says months.

The kid's name is Walt. (Walt Long?? Some other last name?).

Nora says that under the tarp is the "pumpkin launcher" and it's a surprise.

Nora says it's not safe for Michael here, "but soon."

"Hey do you smell that? It smells like rain. It's what you smell like under all the grease and bourbon. It's what your workshop smells like. Something alien happened here. Not that I can still smell it 70 years later."

"This is the best evidence I've seen that Max and Isobel's mother survived the initial firefight. This is something that you do with family."

"Nora's my mother. If she was here at the same time as Louise…"

Note - when did they confirm who Louise was or that she was Max & Isobel's mom? This has not happened narratively yet.

Since Walt was a young kid, Alex thinks there's a chance he's still alive (though at the end Nora definitely thought he died when the barn blew up. I suspect that Walt survived and is the key to the story...not fact, just speculation.)

Forrest: "The foreman, Roy Bronson, was definitely hiding something. But it wasn't Little Green Men. It was Nazi spies."

"This is like Junior Year eraser room, getting caught by Coach Wiggins."

OG callback to the eraser room being the high school makeout spot. OG, "the eraser room takes our innocence."

Rosa in Spanish "¿En serio?" Basically "are you serious!?!" Or "really?" When the blender shorts out (awfully similar to her first Noah nightmare in 2x01)

"...when Charlie told me she had stole classified documents, I reported her. I thought I was doing the right thing and the military put her in prison."

"Right. Where she was safe."

"No. I… I didn't know who she really was when I turned her in. I didn't know what prison would do to her."

"She wanted you to turn her in, Jenna. She set you up to do so. She knew that as long as she was in government custody no one could get to her."

"Charlie fought in two wars. Who was she afraid of?"

"A private securities firm, most likely. You know that I met her? She was working on this genetic sequencing project that had the potential to save lives, but also destroy them. And there were some people out there who saw applications for her research that went beyond her intentions."

"She was doing research that could help save lives, and people wanted to use it to create a bioweapon."

"Well yeah, she created this pathogen that could seek out and dismantle specific sequences. Just think about it -- a smart bomb that could be detonated in the middle of a crowded city, only harm it's intended target. Think about the innocent civilian lives saved while you take out leaders of terrorist organizations."

"Or commit genocide. If her work fell into the wrong hands, it could quietly wipe out entire groups of people because they share a certain genetic code, while their neighbors go about living their lives. Why do you know so much about this? What's your interest in my sister?"

"I believed that I had a use for her pathogen, at one time. But my fight is over now."

A few notes about this exchange.

Clearly Charlie's pathogen is the key ingredient in the smart bomb that Flint was developing, as discussed in 1x12.

Liz's "personal genome machine" can break down the alien genetics and give Project Shepherd what they need to use a smart bomb on the aliens.

Don't forget, her lab is protected by Air Force security set up by "Alex's team". (Badbadbadbad!)

Rosa describing her bipolarism.

"I get these mood swings sometimes. Like, I can be happy and singing one minute, and then, all of a sudden, this darkness just closes in over me, and I have all these voices telling me that I'm worthless."

Jesse gives Cam the name of the security firm looking for Charlie. We don't see the name of it. He warns her to be careful. "I may be hobbled but they are not."

"Now, you were hunting aliens, and I gave you Max's name. Why didn't you lock him up in Caulfield with the rest?"

"I don't know. I guess I feel like there's a story unfolding in Roswell. Has been for more than 50 years. You can't blame me for wanting to see how it ends."

Catherine Zeta-Jones in a laser maze -- Liz is referencing the 1999 movie Entrapment.

Liz trying to science-intrigue Kyle….

"Interesting historical footnote. There was an internment camp in Roswell. Nazi POWs built half this city. Hence the iron crosses. My great-great grandfather BoDean's foreman got busted for hiding a couple of women here. According to him 'A couple Nazi spies escaped and strudeled their schnitzel for room and board right here on this very farm. See, I was never really as into shooting squirrels as Wyatt is, so, when I came out here for summers as a kid, my cousin Kate and I -- we'd prowl the property for artifacts."

"You know, what we're doing you and me -- it doesn't only have to be for Max...once Max is healthy, we could use this genome machine to Target cellular apoptosis. I mean, we could craft polymerase sequencing in human DNA. We don't have to stop. We have no boards, no restrictions…"

Apoptosis is also sometimes referred to as "cellular suicide" or "spontaneous single cell death".

Polymerase is like the building blocks of DNA.

In other words, Liz is really, really smart.

FORREST LONG!!!!!! 😂😂😂.

Alex on the bullet shells: "These match the M1917s the airmen used in '48.

"They were scattered all over the property. Legend has it the Nazis we're building some kind of bomb in the barn. Then one night the Air Force showed up."

"The night of the fire."

"The blaze burned so hot it turned sand to stone. Papers say that lightning struck the barn and everyone died in the flames, but...that's bull. See I think the Air Force covered up the massacre that happened when they discovered that weapon.

A few things on this scene…

Forrest mentions his cousin Kate...Wyatt's sister who was murdered by Noah in 2008. So Forrest is Wyatt Long's cousin.

Substitute Nazi for alien and it's probably all based somewhat based in truth. In the 1940s that definitely would have been a reasonably obvious way to cover it up, especially given the history that Forrest cites and the military culture in Roswell.

Note: POW = prisoner of war

The iron crosses Forrest references…

Article on the German POWs in the Roswell Daily Record…

Walt was hiding in the barn when Tripp made it explode. Explosion looked shimmery, like the alien ship & tech.

Also, more info than you ever wanted to know about the Roswell Army Air Field/Walker Air Force Base/Roswell International Air Center...including some info on the POWs.

Sheriff Valenti's theory on Noah's death:

"I think Max Evans poisoned Noah and left him in the desert the night of the lightning storm, and I think Isobel Evans was in on it."

Kyle says it would take gallons of acetone to poison someone.

Tripp was Alex's great uncle

Nora was working on a ship to take the pods home.

TRIPP MANES!!! Full name is Eugene Manes III.

Alex finally gives Michael the piece of alien ship he's had. He doesn't want to be another Manes man standing in Michael's way.

Cam's voicemail to Liz.

"Got a lead on my sister. Give me a call when you get that tin-star-wearing E.T. awake, so I can curse him out for worrying us all. Good luck Liz. Bring Max home."

Arturo's Spanish to Liz and Rosa.

"Das gracias a Dios. Gracias todos los dias."

Translates generally to "Thank God. Thanks every day."

Isobel's monologue at the end:

"The idea of God always freaked me out. Like, apparently he made people in his own image, which, first of all, get over yourself. And also, does that apply to us? Does every planet have its own God? Let's say that we're all clones of the big guy in the sky. Well then, doesn't it stand to reason that we're all capable of slinging light? Well I guess by that same token we're all capable of tremendous wrath. We're walking contradictions. A never-ending mercurial rise and fall. Darkness and light. I guess the real miracle is choosing the light. Despite the ever-present darkness. Look at us. You're in the middle of a downright biblical desert, galaxies from where we started. I mean, our very existence is a miracle. I'm capable of so much more than I thought I was, Max. I really think that maybe I could do great things. I need you to come back, okay? I need you to be the thing that I can believe in. That doesn't let me down. I just need this one little miracle, and I promise I won't ever ask for anything ever again."

MUSIC:

1. LEN "Steal My Sunshine"

2. Spacehog "In The Meantime"

3. Duke Ellington "Take It Easy"

4. Maná "Como Te Deseo"

5. Oasis "Don't Look Back In Anger"

6. Ben Harper "Waiting On An Angel"

#roswell new mexico #rnm season 2 #episode details #long post #what if god was one of us #rnm 204

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incarnateirony · 6 years

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Terms, uses, and semantics

So, I’ve noticed a lot of terms get used in one wing, and interpreted differently by another wing. And then wing 2 bounces back wing 1 and it swings like an ever increasing, extremized pendulum. I figured I’d put down a couple of points I (personally) hold about these terms, such as:

“Toxic Codependency” and my feelings on it, when it’s misused, and when the word is reflexively adopted in “defense” by another party that isn’t necessarily an extremist,

“Performer Dean”, potential overapplication, and defensive reactions I’ve seen people take in occasionally misunderstanding the general idea *most* people are trying to get at with it,

“Canon,” “Romance,” and maybe a few others. If any of these words have ever triggered you, even quietly, when I’ve crossed paths with them, I’d like to clearly emphasize my personal intent with these, and a few points I think the whole “road to hell with best intentions” has flared up with others based on serial misunderstandings and reactions.

So, let’s start.

Toxic Codependency

We all know the term. Most of us hate the concept of it; followers of a ship in a certain wing praise it. Sometimes it doesn’t have the “toxic” applied but, by nature of “codependency,” it is in fact a toxic form of relationship. However, I do find that this swings into extremes.

Yes, there are periods - large ones - where Sam and Dean’s brotherhood was toxically codependent. There’s times they stepped back from that as well. People who support the brother bond have seem to adapt “I’d like to see a permanent end of codependency” to “I’d like to see an end to the brother bond,” which generally isn’t the intent.

On the other hand, I find that people are so reactive that at times, they have a difficult time discerning between “honest loving sacrifice in a horrific life” and “codependent decisions,” and this word has become so THICKLY adapted into discussion that it seems to rear its head almost any time a decision between the brothers is made.

An example of this is season 13; season 12-13 made a due point to give them everything, then take everything away, and show Dean was not okay just being there for Sam anymore nor did he feel suited to play the caretaker anymore. Season 13 became a mad dash to restore everything, to get everyone back, to have more than just each other. Both brothers featured this: Sam’s familial dream, Dean’s need for Cas and outright desperation to get Mary back; the mutual Team Free Will adoption of Jack. They need and want more.

But people wary of the codependency started panicking at “if we die, we die together,” and simultaneously at Dean sacrificing himself (ergo not “together” but we’ll just slip away from that) as a sign of “them restoring the toxic codependency,” and I think this level of extremism really strips our ability to discuss the evolution of their relationships without crossing our arms in some sort of Ward Against Evil for impact from someone that’s going to get upset about the need for/hate of codependency.

Because that wasn’t codependency; he had Sam - and Jack; Dean’s mind didn’t singlehandedly whittle itself down to Sam. It saw big picture; Dean didn’t do much but nod numbly at Sam’s fateful line (that he ultimately refused the concept of with his decision), maybe with that token sardonic, reserved near-smirk he does when you know he’s turning over something darkly in his head (and generally about to do something radical - that smirk told me Dean had no intention of letting them die together, in the instant). This was a choice for not even just his brother, but his family (and, beneath that, the world.)

But the use of this phrase seems to be strapped on to so many aspects of the brothers’ relationships that it’s almost inescapable.

Yes, there are lots of toxic, codependent aspects they’ve waxed and waned into and out of over time and yes, from the view of someone who wants these characters to find happiness, I’d like them to grow past that. But not everything they do at any moment makes a toxic codependent theme. Two moments (that CLASHED with each other) don’t disrupt two years of cohesion. Sometimes, codependent or not, we make sacrifices, and that certainly wasn’t a single-minded purchase into it. Pressured, and rushed due to plot accordion, but-

That’s just the most recent example at the top of my head. Personally, my use of “toxic codependency” tends to be in extreme reservation, and more often than not, you’ll find me sifting down why I don’t feel something is that.

On the other hand, there’s the argument from one wing that it’s the premise of the show, and that’s deadass wrong. And I hold no bars in saying that. The brother bond is the premise of the show (and now extending into Found Family). These things do not demand the dependency. They break out of it eventually, ESPECIALLY with the Found Family evolution, the gained stability of the bunker as a home, and more.

But I think the fandom pendulum has become so strong in that, for example, One wing says they hate the codependency that hurts them; an extreme opposite wing says it defines the show; the first wing says no, it doesn’t, and they can break out of it; the opposite wing extremizes one way, the first wing does the opposite, until both ends are reading toxic codependency into the first fart in a room, when the real question is “At what point is this healthy support and loyalty, and what point is it toxically codependent?”

Mind: some meta authors etc in the fandom *do* approach it from this angle so it’s not a unilateral statement of “screw everybody,” but I felt the need to put that out there for anyone reading my stuff.

“Performer Dean” IS NOT AN INSULT.

It does not “minimize” any part of Dean. Each and every one of us has performer attributes in the real world, some of us more than others. Performer Dean simply identifies the difference between his surface personalities and hidden enjoyments. This is something the show gave to us only a few episodes into season one.

It’s a safety wall he’s built - and yes, he needs that - but the point of people generally talking about the sublimation of Performer!Dean is that they want Dean to eventually be able to grow to a place where he doesn’t feel the need to perform to his closest companions. It’s similar to growing past codependency.

Dean liked the vegetable water, despite gruffing at it. Something something manly. Dean scoffed and refused shorts, but there he was showing them off later. Illusions of who he needs to be, both for his little brother and the world, are a literal part of canon and discussing this is not necessarily an insult.

HOWEVER,

There’s likely some people that take it a little too far - maybe in wanting Dean to completely drop the points they’ve personally decided are his toxic masculine lines, rather than his personal repressions. And in a world of people with varying opinions, this is an infinite rabbithole of potential overstep. By and LARGE, not many people want to woobify Dean though. I’m of the brand where I’m happy with most of Dean’s current aspects, a few repressions and walls I’d like him to drop over time, but I actually enjoy his masculine attributes as part *of* why I like him as a Bi!Dean stan - because he’s not your “gay man stereotype,” he’s just like a lot of bi/gay dudes around the world are, that are left to throw up walls on the things that make them cautious about being too... well, “not manly.” You know, the over-reactive dudebro that doth protest too much... and then later you find him Doing The Thing.

Because that’s Dean, and that’s what a lot of people talk about with Performer!Dean. If anyone takes it too far, my apologies; but the concept of discussing performer Dean, and repressions of things that are too kiddish/feminine/whatever, are actually substanced in canon, and many meta authors want to see positive progress into happiness for a character rather than stagnance or, worse, regression.

These two major points minded,

despite my occasional use of terms like “toxic codependency” and “performer Dean,” or maybe *because* of them, my ultimate end hope for Dean is a man who’s comfortable to be who he is, with the people he cares about, without surviving on reactive desperation and clinging to “the one thing he has left”, but rather, in support of a growing family unit as he seems to yearn for, without fear of being judged for them - be it over shorts, vegetable water, Elsa, or maybe - depending on your read - who he’s attracted to and what that means to him and his “manliness.” It’s a release of the “toxic” edge of masculinity that just leaves... self-comfortable masculinity.

Supporting bi!Dean and Performer!Dean is in no way intended from me to ever be denigrating to his manliness (and frankly, I find the direct correlation of these ideas to be queerblind at least, lowkey phobic at worst); rather, wanting him to understand that there is no threat to that if he enjoys these things, and that he’s still a powerful individual and as masculine as he wants to be, even if that’s in friggin’ gym or car-washing shorts.

Canon, Romance, Subtext

Okay, so, I’ve gone into this at length in another post before, but I feel the need to do the ELI5 repeat while on a “how I talk and what I mean” post in case anyone missed it:

I adhere to the literary standard of what defines fictional canon (including subtext with authorial intent), and the dictionary definition of romance; to both of these I will always apply pillarings of existing examples, sometimes even from intertext used in SPN like On The Road, sometimes just in basic literary discussion. So if you see me using these words, understand it’s by the definitions in the link (or this shorthand version).

According to basic literary theory, Destiel is canonically romantic; this is different from canonically consummated or being an established, existing, metaphorically betrothed couple. If anyone reblogs or comments on this just to argue with me, I’m going to deadass ignore you, because you’re arguing with the dictionary and pretty much the entire literary field. Spamming an old gif running on two years outdated won’t fix that.

And yes, I would love to see that get a happily-ever-after too, just like the above points for codependency and performer attributes.

UNDERSTAND, HOWEVER,

That this is *not* to be conflated with the concept of representation/LGBT/etc. I understand everybody’s exhausted of the “hide your gays” thing. I personally understand that. I also speak about that as a problem. That does not, however, necessarily attach to any of the above-dressed issues. It is a separate, equally valid issue - distinct and separate, because social biases are a different beast. Just because I hold to “The dictionary and literary field defines X as Y,” does not mean I'm saying, “People who enjoy Y should settle only for X value,” and if you want to pursue Z (better on screen rep/completion/don’t Hide The Gay), that’s great. Doorkicking into any literary discussions I’m having with this blatant conflation and, frankly, sea lion, doesn’t really add to discussion integrity. When I’m talking about issues with “Hiding the Gay”, I invite you to related discourse; if I am holding discussions about literature through the ages, and intertext parallels, please reserve that for the appropriate conversation. If you insist on conflating all problems into one central problem, we just end up with 99 problems that are indiscernible from each other. And that’s just... I ain’t gonna humor that.

I have plenty of discussions out there about the problems with the Hide Your Gays in modern media; I’m not saying it doesn’t matter to me - as a member of the LGBTQ+ community, it does in fact matter to me. But rather than us having a trash-heap of 1,000 problems, I’d like to be able to sort and approach them individually.

More on canon, “fair interpretation”, and even “Death of the Author,”

So I’ve read things like “I have this idea and this reading out of this scene but I’m a realistic viewer and know the authors are probably going to go this direction with this, which is different than what I read/want.”

This is fine as long as we recognize you’re building an alternative canon. The first idea of canon structures is listings of books (or in our case, episodes/incidents) that build a complete work (or genre for review.) If you have habitually “missed the mark” on what the authors have been doing with the show, and where they’re going, you are free to continue to build your own interpretations and try to apply concepts like “Death of the Author” (although like I’ve gone on a tear about before, people generally do that wrong.)

That does not, however, contend with the application of authorial intent WRT subtext and thematics in central canon. You are free to build your own. If you are aware your own is not adhering to what the authors are doing in still-living progression, if you’re at peace with that - that’s fine. On the other hand, if Meta Author B has a habit of nail-on-the-head-ing projections well in advance while your expectations lend the other way, you pretty much have zero room to try to drop a Deuce on Meta Author B.

Literature and entertainment is all interpretation, but if one interpretation continues to hold true to the test of time, and you recognize your interpretation or projection is not holding water to what the authors are doing, well - that kind of says it all? And you’re free to build new canon constructs and interpretations, but if we’re about to line up what authorial-intent-subtext we consider canon, The Way This Works is that the people who are generally right... are generally right, until they’re wrong, and the next applicable lit theory that resonates with existing author statements is the strongest front runner.

Cuz That’s How This Works.

And it definitely doesn’t work by screaming “OOC” at whatever points You Individually Don’t Agree With. Especially if, rather than a single fluke of dishinged ideas, you’re deleting entire recurring ideas or thematics or other expositions.

In short: You’re free your own interpretations and rearranged canons, as long as you’re individually aware and own the fact that That’s What That Is. If you have to delete scenes, content, episodes, decisions, or creative-capacity statements, you are now operating outside of the range of actual authorial canon (and, by nature, the things you see/read/expect/want probably get shattered progressively more often until you adapt). You are free to enjoy your canon. You are free to build as many branches of that as you want. But trying to take a fractured side-canon to joust against consecutively more routinely accurate canon-analysis is just a recipe for a lot of butthurt, so just don’t, in that case?

#supernatural #terminology #what I mean when I say certain words #cuz I've been reading a lot of talk people have about these words #and this is eating at me

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laurenpandora · 7 years

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Devil’s Bargain

So I just spent a good half an hour writing out my post and I went to a different tab and Tumblr refreshed, and I lost it all.

So this is my second draft, which I'm typing out in notepad because seriously I'm not losing another draft. I’ll add screenshots and some more comments in when I can rewatch it, the site I use to rewatch episodes is being a bit slow to upload this one so I have to wait.

Last night's episode was awesome. Absolutely epic. The ending had me staring at my screen for a good few minutes before the adrenaline kicked in and I just started panic typing at anyone who would listen. Including several people who don't even watch Supernatural and had no idea what i was talking about.

But ok I'm gonna need to post about this in some kind of order so we'll start from the beginning.

What on earth happened to Castiel? The last we saw, he was stabbing Lucifer with an angel blade, and suddenly he's injured and passes out? Did we miss something? I'm so confused. Kids poking Cas with a stick because they think he's dead is such a cliche, but still pretty funny. Imagine auditioning for that. Here kids, go poke Misha Collins with a stick.

Immediately knew the cheesy couple set up scene was caused by a Cupid. There was no other way, nothing else is that tacky. I kinda thought that Lucifer might leave the poor guy alive after taking his grace, but I guess that would have been too nice? Lucifer's hand-through-the-chest thing is unnecessarily disgusting though.

Arthur ketch is really irritating. I'm not sure if I'm just biased because of how much he's screwed them over, but I really want to slap that stuck up look off his face.

Asmodeus suggests Ketch stabs Luci with an angel blade. Yeah sorry Asmodeus, Cas already tried that one. But feel free to send Ketch off to kill Lucifer, get himself smote. I'm down with that.

Lucifer being homeless is interesting. I was kinda hoping maybe he'd learn some stuff about humanity, a bit like Cas did, but then that's probably not really Lucifer's style. He is a very complex character. When the homeless man started talking about Sister Jo and her faith healing, it instantly reminded me of Emanuel!Cas, so I figured she had to be an angel.

Dean yes you should have known it wasn't Cas. We've all been saying this for weeks. You've know him how long now? This was a nice scene though because Dean apologises and of course Cas instantly forgives him. <3

Donatello is a great character, I'm glad they've brought him in to help. His explanation about how much fried chicken he's gonna need was brilliant XD

So Sister Jo is an angel named Anael, not too shocking. She seems very smart, and also kind of a jerk. Not the way I was expecting this to go to be honest, I heard Daneel Ackles was playing a character named Sister Jo and was sort of expecting a friendly good character, not rogue Businesswoman Angel, which is much more interesting. Not sure if I like her or not at this point, maybe we'll get some character development and figure it out. I hope she's in more episodes.

Why does Sam have a photo of Lucifer in his phone? Did he take this picture? Did Lucifer send him it? That's a really weird thing to have.

"Oh. It's only you..." Erm, *only* them? Ketch are you okay? Honestly, Sam, Dean and Cas turn up your first thought should be 'oh crap i'm in trouble now'. Castiel's Bitch face at Ketch is the best thing I've ever seen, and the way he just stylishly knocks him out is seriously cool.

So we kinda guessed that the Lucifer x Anael thing was gonna get a bit more.. personal. But it does seem super weird to give Satan a 'love interest'? Not sure how this is gonna go but I'm not expecting her to survive it.

Donatello goes to get his fried chicken and meets Casmodeus. Seriously he should have twigged that it wasn't Cas the minute he said about Michael rather than about saving Jack. I also want to make a comment about the fact that Evil Colonel Sanders is outside a Fried Chicken place. Too good.

Ketch thinks he's saved the day but really he did basically nothing. They honestly don't need him but he's really trying to stay relevant.

So now, surely 'Don't trust Lucifer' is in the angel handbook somewhere? You'd think it would be on page one, right? But no apparently the angels want leadership and don't give a damn who it is. What happened to all that mistrust? Back when they were fighting Amara, Cassifer really had to try hard to convince them to help out, and he had God on the team then. But now, they suddenly want to follow him blindly just because he promised their wings back. Seems a bit weird to me.

Donatello has a case of the Kevins, with the whole 'I must translate this tablet and get super stressed about it' thing. At least he's eating though, hopefully he doesn't end up the sleep deprived mess that Kevin was.

And suddenly Asmodeus conveniently has this Archangel Blade that had never been mentioned before? I mean, I guess it makes sense that you'd need something more powerful to kill an archangel.. because otherwise... that would be pretty.. impossible.. wait..

GABRIEL.

WHAT.

This was the point where I honestly could not speak. I was just sat staring. The entire fandom went crazy. All I could do was type 'OH MY GOD' at the people I was watching it with.

So unexpected!

Half of us were like 'HE'S STILL ALIVE WE FREAKING KNEW IT!' and the other half were like 'WHAT THE HELL? HE KEPT THAT BLOODY QUIET!', because honestly almost every other return this season has been spoilered beforehand, and Gabriel is a major character and a fan favourite, but somehow Richard Speight Jr coming back to the show hadn't even been hinted at before this episode.

And now we have to wait until March 1st to see the next episode! What am I going to do??(That's a silly question, of course I'm going to rewatch the whole season so far, but still..)

Still so hyped from watching this!

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dustydreamsanddirtyscars · 7 years

Photo

04x01 “Lazarus Rising” // 09x05 “Dog Dean Afternoon” 09x08 “Rock and A Hard Place” 09x11 “First Born” // 10x23 “Brother’s Keeper” 11x03 “The Bad Seed” // 12x23 “All Along the Watchtower”

On the Topic of Healing on Supernatural

Loosely belongs to the Series “Of Blood, Bone and Darkness”: A Carver Era Rewatch Hiatus Meta-Series

***prefacing this by saying this meta will probably feature a few very critical/negative thoughts on Dabb and his showrunning***

While working on the next couple of posts for my rewatch meta series linked to above, I kind of realized once more why S9 will probably always be the season closest to my heart and why Carver to me personally will always remain an absolute favourite in terms of showrunning. And it is based in how he structured the narrative stretching from S8 to S10 and the whole MoC arc and how this storyline factored in and built on everything Dean as a person has been through at that point in the show - his struggles, his traumas, his whole life, light and dark spots alike. But not just that I truly adored and still adore how the aspect of “healing” was tackled in those seasons, because it also transfers, transpires and makes a point about to how the series in general deals - or rather not not deals - with the topic of healing, which is a huge and important aspect however and something all characters - even though I will focus on Dean here mostly as the MoC arc was centered around him, his past and his struggles - need deeply, but which to this day and particular for Dean after the mess that was S12 and the showrunning of Dabb seems further off and the least of anyone’s concerns on the writing team than every before. So, that’s why I like to look back to a time when imo SPN was at its peak writing wise.

At the time when S9 aired I have talked about the narrative and the MoC arc often times in terms of “band aid”-metaphors, which to me still seems a very fitting visual, which is why I am bringing it up here again as it also relates nicely to the aspect of healing - or well, not healing. Throughout S9 this topic is tackled and illustrated by two polar oppositional journeys, which are connected to the Winchester brothers (and are also kind of explored in a different but comparable sense through Cas and Crowley growing more human over the course of S9 while Dean veers off into demonhood). One is illustrated by Gadreel possessing Sam in order to heal him “from the inside out” (which serves as a band aid for a deeper underlying problem - the inability of the brothers to let the other one go/co-dependency) and the other is centered around Dean taking on the mark of Cain which poisons him and kind of kills him “from the inside out” (Dean taking on the mark can be also read as a band aid for the underlying issue of his lack of self-worth and as a form of “sentence” for the fallout his decision to save Sam via possession has caused). The aspect of “superficial healing”, which in the end ain’t healing at all, is contrasted to the brothers and is further showcasing “internal healing” opposed to “internal death”. At the time S9 aired I have talked about these things a lot with the summary of “the true big bad is internal”, because in fact S9 did not showcase a true big bad as an external force, but focused on how someone can fall apart if his traumas and issues and fears remain untreated, unheard and uncared for - essentially what happens when much needed time for healing simply is not allowed to happen. This is also imo the reason why S9 was so heavy and so tough in terms of emotions, because it was a very psychological and in that regard very emotion driven arc.

And I love how very intelligent S9 showcased and explored the topic of healing in the MotW episodes as well. I singled out two moments that stood out in particular as they also focus on an internal aspect, consumation/incorporation really (though I won’t go into that in depth as it opens a whole new cans of worms when you bring Freud into it - though his structural model of personality was very directy woven into the MoC arc as I have written about multiple times at the time). In 9x05 “Dog Dean Afternoon” we meet Chef Leo, who is basically dying from cancer but he cheats death by consuming different animal’s organs. When he wounds Sam and Gadreel saves him, Chef Leo want Sam as his next main course for his “healing powers”. Similarly but with a slightly different end game in 9x08 “Rock and A Hard Place” we meet goddess Vesta consuming people’s livers to regain some of her powers. One of her most interesting lines of her surely is the one when she tells Sam he’s basically only barely stitched together and shouldn’t by all means be alive judging from his internal condition. And this is where the Band aid metaphor imo works pretty well again. Because while Gadreel did truly try and heal Sam it was kind of a band aid - like the MoC as a suicide mission for Dean - that was plastered on a bleeding wound, a wound that would be covered up, but that would never truly heal underneath, but fester. Meaning, while physically the brothers throughout the series got mended time and again, mentally is a whole other beast and that beast, showed its claws best in S9, because in that season it was all about how the way one feels and sees himself determines your choices and those can lead you down dark roads and right into self destruction.

Now when keeping all this in mind I find it important and interesting to take a look at how SPN treats healing in general, because imo one thing gets pretty clear when truly thinking it about it: the route the show goes can be seen in direct opposition to what the characters would need for true healing. What do I mean with that? Let me explain. Not always f do wounds stand for a bigger underlying issue with SPN, often times they appear in fights, but still often enough and especially when tied to the big emotional and myth arcs they do stand for and serves as symbols for a larger underlying problem. And especially in those cases I find it very telling how the show tends to deal with these instances, because most of the time they don’t and go the easy route by having Cas for example fix the Winchesters as captured above in 12x23 “All Along the Watchtower” for example. We have seen those moments countless times since S4, but what’s important to remember is that this is physical healing, internal healing is something drastically different. Just because it’s out of sight doesn’t mean it’s out of mind. The best example for that is when Dean looks into the mirror in 4x01 “Lazarus Rising” and sees himself without a scratch but vividly remembers being torn apart by hellhounds. Similarly can be said for Sam and his Hell and cage experiences. Though they both are back top side, it doesn’t mean they are “freed” and that is btw also something S9 utlized beautifully visually with all of the prison imagery we see in that season.

In this regard I find it important to point out one moment in which Dean actively refuses to be healed by Cas in 11x03 “The Bad Seed” (talked about this aspect here in that gifset as well at the time). As talked about in the meta linked to there is much more to this action and scene, but what in relation to this meta imo is important to point out is that in this case Dean actively wants the reminder of what happened, wants to hurt, because he thinks he deserved it. Here being healed would have felt like scorn, because he couldn’t possibly forget what he himself did - so it’s basically in a nutshell an incident in which physical healing and emotional healing as narrative concepts overlap and are head on addressed on SPN and that doesn’t happen a whole lot on the show.

So basically what we witness throughout S9 is Dean internally withering away while Gadreel tries to internally heal Sam. But it’s only a stepping stone of course. Being physically alright doesn’t mean you are emotionally stable. Just because you are healed physically, doesn’t mean you’re healed mentally. And that is something I feel sadly has been very far off, but which is increasingly important for the characters and especially Dean after the MoC arc. This is where the title of this meta “Our scars remind us that the past is real” comes into play, because what the important takeaway from this saying to me is that not only do you realize and remember what you’ve been through when you look at your own scars, but they also tell you that “you survived”, that you’re still standing, that you overcame them, that you grew stronger the more those scars fade away.

And this is where I have to mention once again how I will alway remain more than a bit disappointed how the MoC arc was wrapped up and even more so how Dabb did away with it and the progression and process towards healing was comletely discarded by him. Now of course it is useless to be upset about an arc not playing out the way you wanted, believe me I know, but in terms of set up and how this whole arc was structured to me it never made sense for it to be possible to erase the mark from Dean’s arm, because IT WAS JUST SO MUCH FREAKING MORE THAN A MARK. It served as a symbol abd visual stand in for so much more. It brought up the resentment Dean felt for never having hid own life, how he was treated by his father, etc. etc. and while of course the mark was changing Dean and turned him into something he didn’t wanrt to be, at the same time it did shake things loose that needed to be tackled for a long time in order for Dean to heal. So to me it just doesn’t make sense the way the show “resolved” this, because the mark was just an outward physical sign for an underlying issue Dean has struggled with for years. By simply erasing the mark, to me they took away the possibility of Dean healing and that to me would always have come to be connected with Dean getting more in tune with himself and that the more he healed the mark would have faded away. After all the mark and Amara as a force behind it was directly connected to how Dean was denied an own life, just like Amara wasn’t allowed to exist in her brother’s world.

Now, I did still like it a whole lot when Amara was freed and it got clear that the MoC arc wasn’t truly finished. The struggle Dean had fought on the inside was externalized through Amara and he could head on tackle it. Needless to say of course that didn’t all end in the way Carver had planned as he also wasn’t allowed to kill God. So the aspect and what to me the Amara arc all lead up to: Dean re-integrating his externalized “dark parts” in order to become whole and heal didn’t really pan out. Dean didn’t heal and S12 made a great effort in undoing any kind of step Dean went towards healing from S8 onwards - even though healing was what Amara had wanted for Dean. Instead it’s further off than ever before after clusterfuck that Dabb wrote and called a season, because what he did with all of this set up was throw it out the window and worse made it an entire goddamn scene to say that Dean’s own traumas aren’t even worth mentioning (and yes I know and I have made countless posts on this before trying to explain it when people misunderstand by hate with Dabb’s writing: Dean always puts himself last. That is absolutely in character. The show has done that before, but it always made sure to make it clear that only Dean thinks of himself as worthless but everybody else doesn’t. Now with Mary they did the opposite and the entire season finale showed that indeed Dean’s mother doesn’t give a flying fuck about Dean, but only when he talks about Sam - so yeah, the show or rather D(r)ab(b) made plenty clear how important Dean’s healing is for him...). Sorry about all the hate in the end, but wow, it just makes me so sad and angry to look back and see the amazing structring and narrative focus that was part of Carver era and how it was all rendered undone and useless under Dabb. Anyway, in order to end this post with rather some Dean feels than utter frustration, I’m just gonna leave these lyrics here, because yeah, they do describe Dean and the MoC arc pretty well

“I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut My weakness is that I care too much My scars remind me that the past is real I tear my heart open just to feel”

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its-just-like-the-movies · 7 years

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Date Night!: Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

Back when the swell fella who would become my boyfriend and I were in one of those strange middle grounds where we were on our way to becoming a couple and very, very aware of it, our first sort-of-date was when Tommy invited me to go see Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice on its opening night. I, of course, accepted, somewhat reluctantly. I can’t remember if I was expecting the film to be good or bad, though I’m sure before then some of its abysmal reviews had been public. I was also nervous about the whole “oh my god this is probably sort of a date isn’t it”, especially since at the time I didn’t know him all that well. This would be the first of many dates at Ze Cinemah, although after this we’d be perfectly, happily aware that they were all dates. Even better, I think, is our immediate discussions after the film is over, and how eager we are to talk about it and discuss what we’ve just seen. We’ve seen plenty of films together, and maybe I’ll talk about other ones we’ve seen someday, but I can already feel a pit in my stomach drop at having to talk about this stinking pile of steamingness. All said, Batman v Superman is one of those truly atrocious films, like The Judge or The Danish Girl, that works like so much manure and makes me start sparking and frothing with how horrible they were. It’s an energizer more than it is a depressive, though it for sure is both, and there is one thing about our date in particular that haunts me every day. It’s not even something the film did, but something I did, or almost did, but could have done more of. Something that perhaps could have changed the screening for the whole theater, or as Anthony Hopkins keeps saying in the trailers for the new Transformers movies “change the tide of human history itself”. I wonder about it every day and every night, as I sleep and as I wake, and especially as a type this story to you, The Void, and now I must share the tale of my screening of Batman vs Superman with you to get it of my chest, to free myself, and to see where the tides of human history itself shall take me. Also: I’m going to be very mean to this film, and am very not interested in hearing about how wrong I am from random eggs as I and many others I know have been on Twitter. I hate it, don’t care if you love it, for fuck’s sake leave me alone.

It didn’t take the two of us long to find a pair of seats, though we immediately moved to the row behind us because our view was partially blocked by the structure of the stairwell. We warned the couple who ended up taking those seats about it, though I can’t remember if they moved too. And the film starts. Zack Snyder has the gall to open the film by reminding us that Batman’s parents died in front of him during a robbery gone wrong. He also seemingly cannot hire Jeffrey Dean Morgan to do much beyond die in the openings of his films, though I remember he had more to do in Watchmen. The visual of Martha’s(!!!) pearl necklace snapping in the gun’s safety as the trigger is pulled is sort of fascinating but also pretty grotesque, all things considered. Batffleck is saying something, though I cannot remember what. We see the funeral, little Bruce running into the woods in sadness during the procession, only to fall into a well or pit or some such hole in the ground. The score, I’m sure, was going crazy.

And then, it happens. Baby Bruce is levitated out the pit by seemingly hundreds of bats flying around him like a tornado, floating him towards the light. This is how we are abruptly told that this is a dream sequence, and reader, I laughed. Not the cackle it deserved, but I couldn’t stop it from escaping completely. I chuckled, giggled, whatever; I’m pretty sure Tommy hit me on the arm to calm me down and get me stop but I’m not quite sure. The giggle is what counts, though, and it haunts me. What if I had just burst out laughing at a moment that the whole theater was palpably flummoxed by? Batffleck wakes up but I am still reeling from the horseshit prologue we have been subjected to. It is not the most nonsensical thing we are going to see in this movie. It is not even the least plot-relevant indulgence that Zack Snyder will take us through, nor the least inexplicable jump of energy or plot logic that we’ll be forced to sit through. Academy Award winner Holly Hunter will be forced to stare dramatically, in close-up, to a jar of piss before she and dozens of other people are killed in an assassination plot meant to frame Superman, whose own close up registers at the subtle, bottomless despair and discomfort of sitting on the can and realizing you’re not quite done shitting, except Henry Cavill also registers as remarkably bored. Jeremy Irons reads every line as Alfred Pennyworth with such bitchy, subtly nasty inflections that I actually found the character an unwelcome presence, though if anyone found this a life raft of something enjoyable happening on screen, particularly Irons, then by all means savor him. Amy Adams will throw a Kryptonite spear into an underwater pile of rubble and, with no indication that Lois Lane has been told why the heroes need it to vanquish the rock monster that is Doomsday, dives into the water and nearly drowns recovering it. Batman slaughters - in fact, he often guns down - dozens of criminals on screen, brands sex offenders, had one montage that’s just him training to become even beefier and another, completely bizarre dream sequence that may also be a warning from another dimension’s Flash where Superman is technically Hitler, and Barry Allen screams about Lois Lane before Batffleck wakes up at his desk, which is meant to convey that this May Have Been A Dream Or Is It Ooooooh. This scene has no narrative impact and is never referenced again, though it is not as patently stupid as is the sight of Superman, wielding that Kryptonite spear, deciding to kamikaze himself by killing Doomsday with the knowledge that he cannot survive any assault the giant may bring on him while he is in such close proximity to said spear, ignoring the two superheroes who have been helping him fight Doomsday this whole time.

There are plenty of other absurd, delicious, amazingly shitty one-offs. Michael Shannon is credited for appearing in the film for the three seconds General Zod’s corpse floats in the remains of his spaceship. The President of the United States decides to nuke Superman in the middle of his fight with Doomsday after the latter threw the Man of Steel into the Earth’s orbit (a safe enough distance to nuke him, I suppose). Diane Lane is duck taped and tied to a chair, threatened to be burned alive as Jesse Eisenberg’s Lex Luthor throws photos of her with “Witch” written on her face, and all of this is tied into some mythological asinine crap that is Luthor’s motivation for wanting to kill Superman and create Doomsday in the first place. Eisenberg spends the whole film as some combination of Edward Nygma and a meth addict’s impersonation of Heath Ledger’s Joker, and it is by far the biggest trainwreck in the whole film. I think I also resisted laughing once “MARTHA!!???!?!?!?!!!” happened but in truth, I blocked that out of my memory. The sheer joy of seeing Wonder Woman, and hearing the score come alive as she roars into battle, literally, at some points, is all that is keeping me from giving this film an F grade, though perhaps I just can’t rate an Amy Adams film that low. Gal Gadot is at least enjoying herself, which is in even bigger contrast to the stark constipation that Cavill and Ben Affleck are constantly exuding. The film has ideas about literal hero worship, about what Superman could mean or stand for, and wants to have real conversations about his necessity, but it jerry-rigs them through Christic imagery and working hard to undermine the criticisms of genuine challengers and the critics themselves. Bruce’s hatred and suspicion of the Man of Steel seems completely arbitrary, banking on the fear of Superman turning on humanity in spite of his big coming-out party as a global entity being the eradication of his home species for the sake of mankind. Horrific as the collateral damage was, it’s not in line with anything Superman does in the film, is shown as doing, or is framed as doing by Synder himself, who doesn’t pretend for a moment that there’s actually anything wrong with Superman. He’s content to make the man a misunderstood martyr, a golden boy whose death inspires the formation of The Justice League and the warming up of Batman’s glacial, inherently distrusting heart. Superman is basically fridged on behalf of Bruce Wayne, and it’s clumsily executed as Smallville himself is.

There are so many vile, absurd, abstracted, unnecessary, horrific moments in this film and yet, I still wonder how much that night would’ve changed had I actually burst out laughing at the beginning of the film. What would’ve changed for the whole theater if some jackass sitting hear the back-left had cackled as a small child is literally lifted out of a scene the filmgoing public had seen at least seventy-eight million times by now, one that kicks off an indefensibly ghastly excuse for a Hollywood spectacle lit worse than even the lowest budge episode of The X-Files and colored like it’s scared that bright shades will deflate how Dour and Serious this Cinematic Experience is? Recounting many of the set pieces I’ve already mentioned back to my sister afterwards I couldn’t help cackling at some of them, though I did so far more angrily with Tommy immediately after, baffled not just that I had paid for this film but that it even existed, that anybody who made this gigantic dumpster fire thought that it was in any way a competently crafted, psychologically or emotionally coherent picture. Could we, as a crowd, as a community, have laughed at this horseshit for what it was? I love that in horror movies the audience always make the pact with itself that fine, this is a lot, you deserve a good scream. This picture was even more upsetting, and perhaps if I’d laughed, having taken the piss out of it so goddamn early, we wouldn’t have had to just sit there and take it. We could’ve fought back and laughed at it (with it?), openly railed against it, or just fucking not be quiet throughout this whole ordeal. I will always be haunted by this inaction on my part, and to this day it shames me.

He did try to defend parts of it, but not much, and for sure stole my comments about how Eisenberg wasn’t even playing Lex Luthor when we starting talking about the film to our RA Josh and fellow hallmate Dylan in the hall that same night. Josh peddled the theory that Marvel people had paid off critics to hate on DC’s live-action features, which I challenged by asking why Marvel would even need to do that. It’s not even that DC’s films are so drastically worse than any of Marvel’s features, but Marvel at least has a brand formula at work. Their knock is never that their bad, just predictable and uninspired, though they’ve been getting a little better at going against both those counts lately, with the Guardians films at least. And I will say this for Batman v Superman: It’s awfulness has staked a far larger claim on my mental landscape than The Avengers or Deadpool or most Marvel fare ever has. I liked Man of Steel fine, was particularly impressed by the early minimalism in portraying Superman’s powers, especially his x-ray vision, and was even playing devil’s advocate with family members I saw it with. I’m semi-interested to return to it, but not passionately so. You for sure couldn’t call this film formulaic, perhaps unworthy of all the bombast it’s applying to itself but worthy of notice the way a burning car is, or how Jeff Goldblum and Laura Dern are seemingly in awe of that giant pile of shit in Jurassic Park. As dubious as literally every aspect of this film is, the sheer magnitude of its awfulness is compelling in such a way that I became anticipatory of the film’s eventual Rifftrax takedown as I was watching it. I don’t know how soon into it this idea started, but once Amy Adams dived in to get that spear I could already hear the befuddled joke about Lois Lane: Plot Psychic that Kevin Murphy would probably hurl at the screen, and it made this mess a little bit better.

All things being honest, I am absolutely going to see Justice League with my boyfriend, though I wonder how much more excited he is than I am. I loathed Suicide Squad but thought it was so poorly edited I stopped caring and would up having something of an okay time, appreciating Margot Robbie trying to find a character in Harley Quinn and relishing that Viola Davis actively seemed to want to be there a little as I did. Of course I’ve seen Wonder Woman, a step above most recent DC efforts in that it’s compelling, competently told and emotionally resonant, though it really shows Gadot isn’t much of an actress. There’s a lot about it I questioned in the moment but I am so, so appreciative of Wonder Woman as a film that exists, and one I mostly enjoyed seeing even as I actively wished for a better version of the film while I was watching it. Maybe I should just not see these given how much I end up railing against these projects, but I love watching movies with my guy (who I also love) and they are great conversation fodder. Plus, we watch lots of better movies together! Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice was the first of many, many delightful date night movies, and we weren’t even dating yet! My guy was easily the best part of the film, though it’d be a discredit to it say that it wasn’t a memorable experience, future boyfriend or no. I truly hope I never see it again, at least not sober, but I got a great story out of it, and a great man too, which is more than a lot of movies have ever given me. And at the end of the day, it’s that the biggest reward a person could get? It’s not like this makes Batman v Superman anything more than a gray, ugly, violent, gross, despicable, unpleasant, misogynistic, time-wasting, utterly horrendous, steaming pile of shit. But hey, it counts for something.

#my posts #my reviews #tommy #batman v superman #dc #2016

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elizabethrobertajones · 8 years

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Wait, wait... Who is the character of the season for the other seasons?

Funnily enough I was musing on this after I said that because I don’t think I ever collected them ALL up or thought about a couple, like season 3 which I never think about much if I can help it so that’s a bit of a mess :P It’s something I’ve cared about more since I watched the show after I caught up that first time to season 6, so one of those vague trains of thought I’ve nurtured ever since then. I suppose people can disagree but it’s not really about favourite or BEST characters to me but the ones I think are absolutely the heart of the season in a way with its themes or story or just hold the plot together with the way everything ties into them.

John, I’d say obviously but I suppose you could argue Azazel. They’re like the only 2 options as the ONLY other consistent characters all season, but John’s mentioned almost every episode, it’s his legacy, revenge mission, job as a hunter etc that they inherit, and they’re either searching for him or being guided by what they think he wants them to do or what they want to do in opposition to him. He has sporadic appearances or they have sporadic direct-ish interaction with him to keep up this thread.

Azazel, because now it actually turns up a gear and he’s a character who has some serious presence in the narrative, the special kids thing takes centre stage, and he and his plan lurk in the background; Dean’s angst comes down to what John said about Sam which links back to what Azazel did to him, Sam just dreads it. His death & fruition of his plans ends the season nicely.

Bela, but a massive wasted opportunity because of the strike and her story shoved in at the end; still as a parallel to Dean she means a LOT, and she manages to stir up trouble like getting Gordon AND Victor set on them at various points; she steals the Colt which affects everything, and I cry about the wasted opportunity, because despite the stiff competition from next season’s key character, she actually personifies season 3 in a really fascinating way. The world changed and she and Ruby are the faces of what’s different - Ruby in the plot, but Bela in how the story is told and stuff like continuing subplots about side characters, and people being in the story in a much more interactive way. I really wish that she had had better writing. Ruby on the other hand is mostly a plot mechanism and I only think she really has much impact in 3x09 in the end conversation on Dean, and 3x16 to get in an awkward conversation to start the season 4 stuff: Lilith just takes over Ruby at some point in the last confrontation so she just kind of fades out of that story once she did her part to get Sam and Dean to Lilith.

I probably SHOULD say Cas, but this is Ruby’s season (they’re played off each other as opposites so like Ruby and Bela last season it could be one or the other). Cas has an incredible arc but Ruby is still the key to everything because she’s got the big betrayal coming up, while Cas’s stuff is all personal growth for HIMSELF and honestly the reason I re-watch season 4 so much and just skip to all the Cas scenes, but still. Story-wise, Ruby plays it undercover, her manipulation of Sam is apparent in nearly every episode, even when she’s not there, and she’s reflected in his change. The conflict that SHE is creating between Sam and Dean lurks under the surface of the whole season - I’ve talked a lot about how 4x06 mirrors 4x14 which of course mirrors the fight in 4x21 which leads to Sam going off with Ruby to start the apocalypse, and each time Sam’s in a worse place. And, of course, she probably is the most successful villain of the entire show. She’s woven into everything that happens between Sam and Dean this season, so she rightfully gets the crown.

Michael. Sorry, Lucifer, but you just kinda showed up and started monologuing everywhere and killed the tension. (Again, 2 character in contention and it’s pretty hilarious it’s them in a contest, but yeah :P) The actual dread was always about your brother showing up, and he’s in 2 scenes in person, and spends the entire season scaring the crap out of Dean. Sam’s relationship to being possessed by Lucifer is advertised as inevitable, played up the entire time, and clearly part of his teased downfall/actual redemption and it’s there all season and so you COULD say it’s Lucifer, but I find Dean vs Michael to be more of the MAIN plot because Dean’s resistance, wobble where he nearly gives in and then riding in to save the day at the end to be the sort of main plot where a character had agency. That’s all done in opposition to Michael, and so being possessed by Michael and the way he can deny Dean the agency to save the world is the real threat when you look back on how Dean did it by showing up in full Dean “humanity” Winchester style. I hope I’m not just being a full on Dean!girl about this, but I think the story they told makes him the REAL antagonist, and he’s defeated in 5x18 and that allows Dean to reconcile all his emotional crap with Sam, and for all the mechanical parts of the plan to fall in place (finding out about the rings, getting them, etc), and his ABSENCE after that allows Dean’s character growth

Cas, poor thing. This time all about his absence, and the build up to what he’s doing. And then 6x20, and the reveal. It’s such a masterful episode putting everything into context that I don’t even know what to write about it except like, hey, now I want to go watch it again :P Anyway it squarely puts Cas at the heart of the drama, and from 6x01 the question of Cas’s absence and what he was doing over that year was subtly raised, and his absence and lack of help gets louder and louder as it goes on, until after the 2/3rds mark we begin to find out more of what he’s actually UP to.

Bobby, hands down. He is the on-screen story of grief and loss that mirrors Dean losing Cas and then Cas coming back in a way Dean can’t handle; the season opens and closes with Cas and Dean, with all the Godstiel drama and Dean losing Cas, but the Leviathans just fill space with all their metaphorical depression darkness washing over the world. And Dean needs to make it right with Cas because he needs Cas to get Dick. (Sorry, I watched it last night… So much cackling about boning and Dick like they were cramming in every last joke they hadn’t made yet :P) But again Cas is absent most of the season, and we get a build up with Bobby being more present in their lives than ever, and more active a hunter than ever, and then a whole episode dedicated to losing him, and a whole arc about him returning. He indirectly stops them going after Dick the first time, which actually saves them from walking into the Dick made more Dicks trap, and allows Dean to reconcile with Cas. He lashes out at him BEFORE they move Bobby on, Cas silently attends burning Bobby’s flask, and the next scene is Dean getting it together and forgiving Cas, and learning to approach him, having let go of Bobby. I think Bobby is metaphorical for a HUGE amount of Dean’s issues, from the depression and suicidal feelings and his alcoholism, which he enabled by always pouring a drink every time something sucky happened all through season 6 and the start of 7… Bobby represented a LOT of old ways to survive hunting day after day but not to live a long and fulfilled life, and season 7 grapples with all these dark themes, and in the end they let him go.

Ack, tough one and I have been thinking about it, and I would probably say Metatron despite his brief appearances and the fact he was mentioned in 7x21, but not again until 8x21; still, Kevin is his adjacent main character of the season and Kevin represents most of the tablet drama, because his presence enables Crowley to get all excited about having his tablet read, and for Naomi to freak out and hurry to protect HER tablet. Kevin’s presence as someone who can read all this for whoever snatches him motivates everything, BUT it’s all Metatron’s work, and Metatron’s writing, and in the end the grand scheme he and God had with the tablets and taking down the word and creating prophets. Metatron’s advice in 8x21 to Dean is haunting for season 9, and once he’s back in the game he goes for it and destroys the whole natural order as it had once been since basically Creation. Sam was attempting to do it for GOOD, but fails. Cas is duped into doing a similar struggle, and Metatron does it for evil. Anyway, he’s the heart of all the turmoil in season 8, and like Azazel in season 2 and Ruby in season 4, is the successful villain as a result of being thematically well-placed in the story.

Gadreel, who did what he had to do all the way through the season to wildly mixed results and represents the entire struggle this season. He’s paralleled to Sam, and Cas, and Dean and gets to be Metatron’s lackey for a while. Sam compares how he felt to vengeful spirit type feelings and behaviour, the same feeling that powers Dean while he has the Mark, and both take on these revenge missions which are pointless and filled with collateral damage. Metatron uses Gadreel as a weapon just as Crowley is hoping to add Dean to his collection.

Rowena, who like Kevin in season 8 was the key to getting all the plot stuff done, but this time represents a sort of warning of the coming threat of Amara - the powerful but trapped feminine force appearing in the narrative. Always in chains or imprisoned, she lashes out with her attack dog spell that makes people rabid. She represents a way to talk about a lot of the family stuff, lurking in the background of all the big family stuff - we paralleled her meeting Crowley to Cas reconnecting with Claire, for example, or being the reason Dean explains what family is and isn’t to Crowley in 10x17, obviously paralleled to Cas and Sam off in the background trying to save him with Bobby’s help, who first said that about family. She’s in a ton of episodes and I can’t actually remember them all because I’ve only watched it once, but she and Crowley had a whole mini arc in the background of several episodes, before the whole season ended up being about her spell from the Book of the Damned and the sacrifice she had to make for it. (because of 12x13 I actually was only thinking of this one last week; up until this point I had a thought from during season 10 that it might be Cole if they went down that path of all the revengey father issues stuff, but the season was way more about mothers in the end... because it was about Cole I gave up caring about analysing that pretty quickly and never came back to fill in the gap :P)

Amara kind of hogs this one, and the same deal as with Michael back in season 5, but this time Dean’s positive growth in the end is about letting her go. Like with season 5 he overcomes this milestone shortly before the end - 11x21 I think was where he met her in the woods and resisted her properly. That’s the parallel to 5x18 and him managing not to be possessed by Michael. After that the elements fall together to resist her, and once again Dean “Humanity” Winchester, unburdened, walks in to talk it out, this time without anyone getting hurt or dying. This season seems to be all about her dark compulsion on Dean and also the consequences of her being locked away, this time setting up the stage for the next season and Mary’s return

You’ll notice I rarely list actual main characters except Cas that one time, and I stand by Ketch being the representation of this season because I think Mary fitting under the family bracket makes it all interpersonal drama, and so far I think Ketch has been written to represent all the other themes outside of family much more consistently, like with what the main plot is and what the villains truly represent… Knowing HE is awful while all the others try to play nice, especially, acts as the reminder he’s what’s underneath their nice mask. I suppose the BMoL as a whole are the key thing this season, and we still don’t know who the boss is so by the end I may change this to a season 8 Kevin > Metatron one if the leader is compelling, but Ketch is the character they built up with like 5 faceless appearances of increasing horror before he showed up with a grenade launcher and that stroll into shot, and like I said, he’s horrifying enough that I’m sticking him with Amara and Michael as the GENUINELY scary villains who hog the story. :P This season’s themes are pretty different and the style is really hard to grasp one clear thing compared to the other seasons because it’s churned up all the other seasons into it, so the family are all re-treading a ton of past emotional beats and whirring through their own stuff destroying various re-takes on ALL their past mistakes and emotional arcs. The Ketch stuff is an actual clear line through the story and completely unique to this season and its stuff. Like, “oh yeah this season one of the Winchesters is betraying another and now two of them are betraying the third and -” yeah it’s all been there done that… This guy managed to be a menacing enough presence we guessed he was stalking them from a single glance at a motorbike an episode before that was ever confirmed to be his :P

#Asks #my stuff #uuh I have no idea how to tag this #just bunging it in the tag for where all my weird thoughts about stuff are and leaving it at that or I tag the entire show somehow >.>

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enemymine2000 · 8 years

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Fandom rambles: Destiel

Random disclaimer: I am late to the party, but I'm only just now trying to catch up on Supernatural. I have binge-watched as much as I could the last couple of months and right now I'm at 11.17, so roughly only a season left to finally catch up with y'all. Therefore I don't actually know what's going on in canon right now, apart from the random gif-set or meta. I don't tend to spoil myself willingly (too much). Random dislcaimer to the disclaimer: I tweaked the programmed fall of Castiel a little bit after I finally caught up with the show. (YEAH!) Meaning I added “a bit” to the text, but my argument still holds despite Chuck being kind of a douchenoodle. I also clarified some of my ramblings, while I added to others. Wild ETAs appear, but since I couldn’t catch them all, I haven’t identified them all. So basically I re-wrote some of it without actually changing my hypothesis.

That being said…

In my mind Destiel low-key exists in canon. It's not only the fact that it is always especially acknowledged in the more meta episodes – as much as I love Sam's fascination with the subject. But simply the way the show is actually written.

There was the line spoken by Sam, while Dean had his focus completely on bringing down the Leviathans, that went something like: “Are you looking at porn or are you exclusively into dicks now.” The casual viewer laughs it off as a nice pun on the name of main villain Dick Roman, but underlying is Sam's acknowledgment of the fact that his brother very well might not be totally straight either.

Random discourse on sexuality: I'm totally straight, so all I know is second-hand knowledge and stuff you read and hear over the years of existence. But what I know is that bisexuality does not mean that you can't have a predominately type or gender for that matter.

So us only seeing Dean's female conquests doesn't automatically negate any chance of him being bi. As well as him obviously favoring female Asian porn.

I mean, come on. I'm a straight woman, but I prefer to watch male gay porn. Doesn't make me a gender-bent homosexual. (Please, no wank on the nonchalance I display. Everyone does themselves, I do me.)

Sam practically always takes the chance to tease Dean about possible male/male relations when it arises. Mostly in connection to the Winchester Gospels/Supernatural fan fiction they come across and practically always in regards to Cas.

Little brothers always know best, I'd say.

So I take that as as much verbal confirmation we'll ever get, unless the show mans up and gets The CW to back down on their “please, no homo for main characters”-policy. Which, come on, Supernatural got an early renewal for season 13, they could really start to give us a treat.

Anyway… It was established very early on in the Cas' storyline, that the angel Castiel and the Righteous Man, Dean, share a most profound bond. Something beyond everything Castiel feels for anyone else, except maybe Chuck himself – but that is practically his operating system and doesn't really count as changeable feeling. I heard even Lucifer still loved Daddy dearest deep down in his blackest of hearts and by Chuck he really tried not to. So operating system it is.

Castiel having that deep of a bond with Dean is not part of that. In fact it even interferes with all orders he gets from Heaven in his first two seasons.

He is not meant to get attached, but he is and it slowly but surely changes his basic programming. He comes to love humankind in a way that practically no angel since allegedly Lucifer has done. He starts to understand them on a basic level even while still being a celestial being roughly the size of the Chrysler building.

Castiel falls without actually falling from Heaven. And even when he later gets caught and reprogrammed by Naomi, his attachment to Dean wins over his new orders. This bond runs deeper than his connection to Heaven and even his faith in his father, the two fundamental pillars of his very existence. Nothing should be able to beat that, but his connection and feelings for Dean do. Again and again.

Which is something that in my opinion can't be stated enough. The angel Castiel was a good soldier. The leader of his garrison. He was trusted and in return he had blind faith in the cause of Heaven.

The soldier fell because of one human man.

No matter his role in prophecy, at the end of the day Dean is nothing but a pathetic, weak human man. Functional alcoholic with enough issues to pay the bills for all of New York's psychiatrists. (I've heard there are a lot of them.) A guy, who as much as he loves his brother, he doesn't even fully trust him. Not enough to tell him that he is screwed up after his stint in Hell anyway. And it gets only worse as the seasons progress.

A man who doesn't even believe in God's plan when confronted with the proof of its existence. Ironically by meeting Chuck himself, but hey, a God does what a God has to do, right.

And here it is, something I think is highly overlooked when it comes to the discussion of whether or not Destiel might be real, going canon or what-not. The fact that Chuck not only knew about Castiel falling, but it was part of His very own plan. Castiel needed to fall for the Winchester Gospels, which were practically the Word of God – without anyone knowing at that point, okay, but still – to play out as intended. (ETA: As much as the Apocalypse in Supernatural had been engineered by leader-less, bored angels, its happening has been foretold for close to 2000 years, I guess from the prophecy of John until today, so even without the Winchester Gospels a Righteous Man was foretold to break the first seal, so there always needed to be an angel to raise the Righteous Man out of Hell - innocent soul after all. For the ultimate fight in the Apocalypse the Angel Breeding Program always watched over the bloodlines which would bring forth the perfect vessels for Lucifer and Michael and always needed to make sure to keep the vessels alive as long as there was no replacement/next generation ready. Meaning of course somekind of guardian angel. Lucky Cas, he just was doomed from the start, when the bored upper echelon jump-started the Apocalypse program. Because of course he was chosen (? - programmed?) to raise the Righeous Man, who just happened to be Dean freaking Winchester, Michael’s perfect vessel. The Upper Echelon and The Angel Breeding Program obviously were never good in keeping each other informed. Which is why Chuck hadn’t expected Castiel to be there, despite the Winchester Gospel - the amended version of the original prophecy. When Chuck still was on top of everything Heaven, those mistakes simply didn’t happen and therefore even God himself could not foresee Castiel taking an active part in the Apocalypse - with the rebellion so to speak. But Chuck definitevly foretold, aided and abetted even, the rebellion and hoped to himself to stop his own program, for it was not meant to go off that early. And he really couldn’t have his angels running roughshod over his plans, especially while He still enjoyed his creation. As a nice little compensation for stopping the unstoppable, Chuck rebuild Castiel after Lucifer was back in the cage. But the angel was already infected with the Winchester-virus and still screwed, which at this point Chuck must have known, even when he still didn’t overly care for his “son” and whatever would happen with Heaven going forwards.)

So since Chuck in Supernatural, despite all his flaws, still is an all powerful and omniscient being, it de facto was God's Will for Castiel turning his wings on Heaven for Dean's sake. (ETA: Him knowing and not changing things in this case means “God’s Will”. We can not assume not knowing, since Chuck turned up for “Supernatural - The Musical”. We know he did not care until it was actually kind of too late - if it wasn’t for the Winchesters - and threatened His own being for once. So if He knew and did not change things, it implied His Will, even if only by omission of doing something else.) He might not have known about the clusterfuck Heaven produced due to jump-starting the program, but he did not change the course history would take after by running an anti-virus program against human emotions through Castiel when he rebuild the latest version he had transformed into. The version that going forward had the free will to go against Heaven and therefore laying the groundwork for the literal fall of all angel-kind. (Something that He still, to the best of my knowledge has not fixed. So all angels still depend on the stairway to Heaven, Cas is so far gone down the human route, he practically is human inside. So whatever clusterfuck “of cosmic proportions” happens next, I blame it on Chuck for not taking the time to reorganize Heaven before He made of with Amara to wherever.)

Heavily flawed Dean Winchester - ah well, even Chuck couldn't plan out all details in advance. But the Winchester line was part of the Angel Breeding Program and therefore always meant to produce Michael’s, but with an infusion of demon-blood also Lucifer’s. And there must have been a point in history, where it was obvious to look to Dean when it came to the Righteous Man. I mean, the Upper Echelon were not one day like: “Let’s jump-start Apocalypse, who is the most likely candidate for breaking the first seal in Hell right now.” They must have known to watch for Dean, before he was taken by the hellhounds. To observe, how long he would hold out. They must have planned to have him being the Righteous Man from the moment he made that damn crossroads deal. Them not intervening on his behalf is evidence enough for that. Dean Winchester was Michael’s perfect vessel. The only possible candidate at that point. Adam was not a product of the Angel Breeding Program, therefore not on their radar until the Winchester brothers discovered his existence, which was after the Apocalypse had started and Dean had already declined various attempts to have him become Michael’s meatsuit. The Angel Breeding Program was desperate, for the Apocalypse was to far advanced to delay the ultimate fight much longer and in the Upper Echelon’s need to have something happen, they missed the fact that it’s always good to have a spare. Which normally would have been Sam, but alas, demonblood infusion. A goner for Lucifer as far as they were concerned - and hence probably the only reason they were so desperate in having him stop consuming demonblood. He was too far ahead schedule for Heaven’s liking. So, having Dean be the vessel while also be the Righteous Man was not well thought out, but the Upper Echelon hazarded the consequences. They send Castiel to raise him after the First Seal was broken and kept him on his case, so the vessel would not be gone before it was its time to be used by Michael. Practically a 2-1-deal for Heaven, right? Only Dean’s main flaw is to go against the machine and beat the odds or die trying. Therefore he corrupted Castiel and formed him to be the Cas we all know and love.

All in Chuck's plan, by planing the Apocalypse and not changing the program once it was started by Heaven - although, maybe he did. We call Chuck’s books “The Winchester Gospels”, but are they still gospels, when God himself wrote the script? He sure didn’t care about everything enough anymore, but he still kind of liked just being with his creation and he definitively is a stronger being than all others, except Amara. So he could have simply changed some things to keep his creation going without outright stopping the Apocalypse - which was meant to happen anyway by him, just not that year - but in favor of Team Free Will. Or maybe he really did not care either way and had already his room prepared and was willing to wait there for whatever as long earth itself continued to exist - well, and Amara was not freed, I’m pretty sure that would have been an instant deal-breaker. Either way, Chuck’s plan. Either by action or inaction.

But, you say, what does that all make Dean and Cas necessarily into a gay romance thing. Nothing at first. But then you must also remember that Cas is a celestial being first and foremost. He is only a he, because Jimmy Novak's body turned out to be his perfect vessel. Angels are basically genderless and as Cas himself once said during his first couple of seasons, they don't judge based on gender or sexuality. It simply is what it is.

That also makes the point moot some might offer up, that Cas only ever seemed to be physically attracted to women.

For starters we have way too little data. Cas has had a boner watching hetero porn (in reaction to the babysitter or the pizza-man we don’t know) and in a pinch acted out on what he saw with Meg. That was not attraction, that was simply a life and death - try to distract them - situation. Meg being attracted to Cas is another thing altogether. But to quote Jensen on whether he ever thought about Jared in a sexual way: “Who wouldn't want to tap that!”

So the whole Clarence-schtick starts. Cas not being in his right mind at the time makes everything we might see from him, before he regains his sanity, moot. Consensual issues and all that jazz. Even for celestial beings.

Remains the one line about him having been willing to give it a try before Meg sacrifices herself. Again with the “Who wouldn't want to tap that.”

Cas genuinely came to care for that demon, who had been willing to go against everything demons stand for and help out an angel. Said demon inhabiting a nicely build body and obviously being good at kissing is not a turn-off either.

But most importantly, both knew that it would have taken a miracle for Meg to survive the coming minutes. It was their way of comforting each other and saying goodbye.

The next one we are being shown is April. Cas has now truly fallen in every imaginable way. Heaven's Gates are closed, he is without his grace and thus purely human and on the run from literally every angel there is. And all are on earth, he can't see their true faces anymore and he feels he has to protect the Winchesters by staying away after what has happened with Hael, who pretended to be on his side only to turn around and use him for her own gain.

April appears to be human and nice and one thing leads to another. Not necessarily to be taken romantically. I mean, take a look at the situation and try to imagine living it yourself.

At this point Cas is as human as he can possibly be emotionally. He is on the run, running on empty, injured and doesn't know whether there will ever be a safe place for him anywhere. He doesn't even know, where he belongs to anymore. He will always be angelic at heart – literally an eternity of being one will not be so easily erased – but he is truly human now. The Gates of Heaven are closed, so even if he somehow got his grace back, he would still be trapped on earth. Should the Gates of Heaven open again, he would not be welcomed due to his role in the Fall and his time as Godstiel.

His live is in danger from practically everyone now – humans are so much more fragile and complex as angels – his only allies are the Winchesters who are always in trouble one way or the other and really don't need all angelkind on their case too. He is hurting on all levels and there is just this one little beacon of hope called April. Doesn't hurt that she is attractive and he inhabits a hot-blooded male body, which obeys a simple programming. Eat, sleep, procreate. Repeat.

The only true interest on an emotionally level Cas shows to a woman is during his Steve days. But then again, he is new at this whole being human thing. He desperately tries to blend in and Nora seems to be genuinely kind to him.

He misreads her intentions though, for he simply doesn't know better. Nuances of human interaction are still too much to handle for the former angel. Not too forget, that he is disappointed in Dean for turning him away from the bunker.

What would you do if you literally had no one else and would wanted to fit in? You either despair or you would try to find new friends. In this scenario, you would accept the apparent invitation for a date and go with the motions. (We literally see him imitating others in that very episode, where he to goes with the motions without understanding the subtext of the interactions.)

IDean's appearance in “Steve's” town throws an emotional wedge into Cas' new life. Despite him still going through the motions, his pain is palpable. He misses being Cas, he misses Dean and it hurts him, that Dean seems to be so nonchalant about the prospect of him dating. Enter the Rit Zien, the “mercy-killer-angel” Ephraim, who comes after Cas.

That concludes the data. At least as far as I'm currently aware. Three females (at least in body) and a porn video (maybe).

Again, Cas as an angel simply has no appointed gender. No appointed sexuality. He simply does not care about such concepts. It is what it is at any given moment.

But his heart, well, that is another matter. The strongest emotions he feels when it is Dean. The strongest bond is to Dean. Dean is acknowledged in canon to be his ultimate weakness and also strength in nearly every episode Cas makes an appearance.

So saying that Cas not only loves Dean, like he would love all humankind (Chuck programmed that into his angels too), but is in love with him is not a stretch. It simply is stating a fact.

So back to Dean's point of view. There is way more data to be had canonically. But also a lot to be left to the imagination.

We hear a lot more about Dean's conquests than we do actually see them. Whenever Dean has a night in the town, so to speak, it is more alluded to the fact that he picked up a random woman than actually shown. So it could very well be, that some random men might be among the conquests.

I again might want to remind you, that Sam is completely calm about the prospect of Dean being with men. He never even hints at being uncomfortable with the thought.

I mean, I don't know about your family, but my brother, as cool and modern and open-minded as the little shit is, would still be left speechless for once if he suddenly got confronted with his sister turning to the other side. He would snap out of it very fast, but he still would have his moment of reevaluating me and our relationship, trying to figure out where he might have missed hints and stuff like that. And than the bastard would probably humorously ask if he could leave me and his girlfriend alone in one room. As I said, he can be a little shit. I love him regardless.

We see nothing of that sort from Sam. Meaning he had that moment sometime off screen, probably way back in the brother's past. Knowing John Winchester, probably not when the old man was around, but had left his sons somewhere in a motel by themselves.

Well, I've heard teenaged boys are horny as fuck and no adult supervision and only a little brother to think about… Who knows how many conquests Dean had in those dingy motels while being left behind to look after little Sammy. Who knows, maybe Dean even had to do some stuff of the sexual kind, just to keep questions at bay and Child Protective Service off their backs. (I mean come on, John was sometimes gone for weeks and two underage sons left in dingy motels without parental supervision sure raises questions and causes problems. Keyword being “dingy” here – low-lives are to be expected, societal outcasts and all the crop of the worst. And they were not so far of the grit as to have noone care either. The boys went to school, so had to probably meet the guidance counselors frequently and as much as humans are flawed, at least a couple must have cared that these boys were permanently moved around and left in motels. You get where I'm coming from.)

Dean was drilled from 4 years old to do literally everything he can to keep Sam safe. You know he would go down on his knees to blow someone if that is what it takes.

So, I think Dean thinks sex is sex, no matter the gender. No hindrance on the matter of Cas occupying a male vessel for him.

Emotionally is a different matter altogether, but that’S not because of some big gay revelation but because everything and everybody Dean loves dies. He learned that when he was 4 and his mother burned. He learned that again and again at the knee of his father, while he was taught to be Daddy’s perfect little soldier. Don’t feel for those people, just come in save them or gank them, when they are monsters. It is the family business.

Imaging living that life! Being responsible for your younger brother like a parent, being a soldier instead of a son for your father and just slightly more than a passing glance for those you meet on the road. The only one who cared for Dean’s emotional well-being was Bobby (and later that guy on that farm for wayward boys). That is not enough to learn normal human responses and emotions.

Case in point Dean chosing the family business because he saw Sam in his father’s car, when John came to take him away from that farm, instead of saying “screw you, I’d rather go to prom with my girl”. Because that would have been a normal teenage response to being left behind and then actually liking where you end up. Teenagers are self-centered. Dean is not. He is Sam-centered. All his relationships (romantic and otherwise) show that over the course of the show and it only started ro gradually change once Dean could shift some of his focus away from Sam and onto Cas.

Lisa and that girl on that farm are the only ones, Dean is shown to have allowed in deeper. But still not deep enough. He left the girl basically for Sam. He did the same with Lisa. Oh, with Lisa he says, it’s because bad things tend to follow him home and it will never stop, so he not only leaves her and Ben, but actually has himself erased from their memories. But it’s more that he can’t open himself to them fully. He can’t let them in and just assumes, they wouldn’t want in anyway with all the creepy things that wait there. He never even tells his brother that he loves him, instead having the “bitch, jerk”-ritual. No, Dean tends to keep it casual, because that is what was drilled into him by his father. The very father who lost his wife and couldn’t deal with it other than to seek revenge until the very end. No matter the consequences. Even if those were the lives of his sons. The very father, who had another son, which he also could not let in. Because what you love dies, so better not commit to such an emotion. At the other end of this we have emotionally constipated Dean, who never learned to love anybody except his brother, who lets in Cas. He trusts Cas, when he can’t even trust his own brother. Even when ruled by the Mark of Cain his trust lies with Cas. He asks him to take him down when he loses control. It is Cas he asks to care for Sam, when he can’t anymore, when he gets ready to meet his fate, when he carries the soul-bomb to Amara. The guy who says he does not do chick-flick moments has those with Cas en masse, but with no one else. Even Sam. Case in point, the aforementioned wish for Cas to put him down, when Dean still denies for a couple of more episodes getting worse to Sam. Or when meeting Cas (at that point possessed by Lucifer) in the bunker, telling him about his special connection to Amara, when he didn't tell Sam anything beyond “I met her and we didn't kill each other and that's how I landed a mile away from Baby in a field”. It took again a couple of more episodes for him to admit that to Sam and probably only because he knew he needed to, otherwise he would ruin their chance to banish the Darkness.

Dean showing his emotions for Cas in coming through for him, trusting him with his inner most thoughts and secrets, is practically his way of shouting his feelings for his angel from the rooftops. And the world, demons and angels and everything in-between, takes notice.

In conclusion:

Destiel is already canon. But it is a frustratingly slow burn. Maybe we will never been shown them as a couple for various reason – doesn't fit into the narrative, destroys the flow of the show, or the execs at the network don't want something like that on the screen – but it already is.

And the actors already play towards it.

Misha's blatantly baiting of the bond, heart-eyes and all, shows that as the actor who has to portrait Castiel, he knows and understands the love his angel feels towards that damaged human. And the exasperation that Dean has not yet acknowledged it openly, when the whole universe is already aware, but that is Dean Winchester for you and what is he to do…

Jensen stating that he does not see Destiel shows how Dean can not (yet) acknowledge the emotional bond beyond friendship. As an actor he simply can't allow for fannish what-ifs and headcanons. Dean has to keep a certain amount of distance. He is hurt by all the losses in his life and he will not admit to feelings for Cas, if there is the slightest chance of the angel getting in danger because of him.

That certainly would make sense from a director/writer's point of view. Maybe Misha has been told that Destiel is a already thing, while Jensen has not been told the same, to keep that vibe of uncertainty which gives so much motivation for the characters and so many plots for the show.

Maybe everything I wrote is total beeswax and Destiel is all in my head. But at least you'll get now some of the reasons, why I ship them.

#Supernatural #Destiel #meta #my thoughts on the matter #just rambling #because of the recent fandom wank #late to the party #story of my life

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