#Dreadlord Proletius

[uupiic]

Damn it. Knew he ought to have made sure he also got the actual current Prince of Dundee, not just the big statue.

Ah well. Nobody’s perfect.

Bit chilly, innit?

______

From ‘Keeper of the Celestial Flame of Abernethy’ by Gloryhammer

Look it up. I hear it’s a neat song with a nice video to go along. If I link to it, the tag goblins will eat the post ;n;

[wearerandomlyyours]

In the fires of ancient cosmic destiny,

Evil will rise

And of the legendary warriors,

None will survive

In the fires of ancient cosmic destiny,

Evil will rise.

To defeat the power of the sorcerer,

Great sacrifice.

I find it kind of heartbreaking that Anstruther's dark prophecy states that all the legends involved in the final battle (on both sides) will not survive, but it doesn't specify anyone by Angus actually dying.

Zargothrax dissolved into liquid dust, yes, and Dreadlord Proletius was destroyed (you can't technically kill a hologram, but I digress), but Ralathor, Hootsman, and Angus all die as well. Angus sacrifices himself to the fires of Schiehallion, of course, but Hoots and Ralathor the Hermit both died on Earth when Hootsman detonated his neutron heart. Angus is the only one who went through the terrorvortex intact.

Ralathor the Warrior is either a manifestation of the terror dimension or a regeneration a la Doctor Who, and Hootsman's 'essence' merged with the terror dimension and made him a god, but he still blew himself up, and died to be reborn as a deity. Ser Proletius can be rebuilt, and of course there's Zargothrax Clone Alpha-1, but...

In the fires of ancient cosmic destiny,

Evil will rise

To defeat the power of the sorcerer,

The Prince of Fife must die.

All five of the legends died in the war.

Angus is just the only one who can't come back.

[camdennightingale]

I hope you don't mind me throwing another 💛 at you? What's your opinion on the lack of content to Ser Proletius in GH?

Absolutely do not mind in the slightest! Send me asks, they make me happy!

The lack of Ser Proletius content is absolutely despicable! He's such an interesting character if you actually stop to look at him. He's the Grand Master of an order of knights who ride giant eagles, he must've done some pretty amazing things to get there! Then, just under a thousand years after his death, he's considered such a hero that he's resurrected via hologram to help the forces of justice. And who did Zargothrax seek out to corrupt to his side? Ser Proletius! That's who!

The lack of him in the actual canon is bad enough, but I can certainly make an effort to add more of him to the fandom! He needs more love and I intend to write so much for him!

Can you tell I have a lot of feelings about Ser Proletius?

[magic-dragon-s-keep]

I made a tag yourself meme of the Gloryhammer characters. I’m green bean and cave dad.

[smolsleepyfox]

Ok, so with those writing prompts: Gloryhammer; anger prompt nr. 18. I'll leave the choice of characters up to you.

I know this was an anger prompt but somehow my hand slipped and now it’s funny, partially inspired by you and DML’s latest stories. Enjoy.“Goose”

Characters: Dreadlord Proletius, Zargothrax

Summary: Zargothrax is Not Happy with how things are going in his Pyramid of Evil, and Proletius gets to feel it, but in a different way than expected.

The room was entirely silent, only the clicking of nails on crystal being heard.

Zargothrax was annoyed.

VERY annoyed.

Evaporating a few goblins had not helped his mood in the slightest. Neither had the drink he'd summoned for himself nor the fuzzy socks that at least solved the issue of having cold feet. Or just take a hot bath. Really, he'd thought updating the heating system with some magic should have solved the problem, and the air was warm. Somehow though, it didn't help.

A shudder ran through him, and he flicked his fingers to heat up the air around him a little more.

For some reason, he thought about a story he'd heard many centuries ago, as a child that had not yet discovered the grand gift bestowed upon it.

When you were cold or shuddered out of nowhere, a goose just walked over your grave.

He'd have goose tonight, he decided. With sweet gravy and potatoes, because even a dark emperor knew the value of tasty potatoes. At least they didn't ask dumb questions or made your feet cold randomly.

But first, business, which was the reason for his ill humor in the first place.

When he proclaimed himself emperor of Dundee, he had not realized how much WORK that meant. He couldn't just vanish for days into some ritual that left him satisfied, but exhausted, because when he inevitably came back, work had piled up even more than it already did.

Sure, the audiences were fun. People were scared of him and revered him, which was what he'd always wanted, but if he simply slaughtered everyone who annoyed him once, there would soon be nobody left to rule over, which was why he'd abstained from giving that order for weeks now.

Which didn't improve his mood.

So when the doors opened, he was about ready to let go of his resolution and just zap the being that dared interrupt his sulking, until he saw that it was Dreadlord Proletius.

The only person he could NOT take his mood out on, because the knight was far too valuable an asset to be killed.

Well, not killed killed, he was already dead, but Zargothrax was not about to split hairs. Speaking of hair, he should maybe clip his a bit, there was this ONE curl that he could not tame even with magic and it drove him mad with anger.

"My lord?"

Zargothrax jumped, having been so caught up in his thoughts he hadn't noticed the deathknight come closer, standing at the bottom of the stairs to the throne now.

"What?!"

"We... finished the task you gave us." Ser Proletius looked nervous. All people did when they stood before Zargothrax’ crystalline throne, as they should, but his force's commander usually didn't seem that anxious. That could only mean something was up.

"Which task?", Zargothrax asked, both to test the dreadlord.... and also because he couldn't remember. He had a lot on his plate at the moment, little of which was edible.

Proletius looked at him like a deer that had just spotted an eagle diving for it.

Hm, tomorrow he could have deer. It had been a while and perhaps he could go out and indulge in the silly, but satisfying tradition of hunting."....we... conquered Edinburgh? ...my lord?", Ser Proletius said, once more interrupting Zargothrax’ pondering.The sorcerer let the shadows covering his eyes work to his advantage as he thought hard if, and when, he'd ordered this particular operation.

Proletius cleared his throat, wincing as something popped in there, reminding him to renew the spells that kept his body from falling apart bit by bit. The battle had taken a bigger toll than he'd feared, the winding, narrow streets not ideal for an attack from the sky.

"We also uh, slaughtered some peasant in Auchtermuchty, Lord Zargothrax."

Zargothrax blinked at him. Then his eyes narrowed, their usually muted glow turning to blazing crimson.

"I did not ask you to do that, did I now?"

Proletius involuntarily took a step back. And a few more as Zargothrax got up, descending the stairs leading up to his throne of polished onyx.

"In fact, as I recall," the dark emperor went on, his voice dangerously low, "I remember specifically saying that Auchtermuchty should be left alone, for now."

"No, I'm pretty sure-" Proletius fell silent, with horror realizing that arguing with Zargothrax was not something one did if they wanted to live without pain.

"What was that?"

"Nothing, Lord Zargothrax," Proletius replied as calmly as he could. "My apologies,  I must have mixed something up-"

Lights exploded in front of his face. He felt his armoured hand hit something as he fell, perhaps one of the pillars, before his back hit the floor with a clatter of armour. His head followed soon after, responding with a flash of pain and nausea that lasted for anythign between seconds or hours. When his sight cleared and he tried to get up, groaning quietly, he expected Zargothrax to stand over him, ready to hit or kick him again. It wouldn't be the first time the dark emperor had taken out his anger on him.

But instead, his eyes met those of his superior, who looked exactly as shocked as Proletius was. His hood had fallen back, revealing smooth brown hair, and blood dripping from his lip.

He was also sitting on the floor with his robe having tangled itself in his legs, revealing what looked suspiciously like tight leggings sporting the black and white pattern of a piano keyboard... under thick woollen socks in the ugliest green and purple pattern Ser Proletius had ever seen.

Zargothrax wiped his face, blinking down at the red spots on his glove as if he had never seen either blood, nor a hand, ever before.

".....Are you alright, my Lord?", Proletius asked carefully.

They sat in a poor of water, the moisture of the nigh tropical air in the room having accumulated on the stones. Zargothrax must have slipped while being too concentrated on scaring the pants off his force's commander.

He'd already wondered why it was so warm in here.

The sorcerer got to his feet, staggering slightly until he could disentangle his legs from his red robe, pulling up his hood and generally trying to recover his dignity. The fact that his black cloak and the entire back of his robe were dripping wet did not help.

"My Lord, the messengers from London are he-" The goblin went up in flames."No more meetings," Zargothrax ordered. "Get someone to bring me dinner. Goose, with gravy and potatoes. And it better be good." With that, he turned on his heel – Proletius pointedly overlooking the flash of magic as Zargothrax saved himself from another fall on the slippery floor – and strode past the throne to his private chambers. If the cloak hadn't been soaked, it would have made for a wonderfully dramatic exit. Like this, it only dragged after him like a sad cleaning rag.

Dreadlord Proletius turned his head as he heard the door open. His second-in-command blinked at him, taking a moment to spot his superior on the floor.

"Um... any orders?"

Proletius only shrugged. He got up, shaking as much water off his armour as he could, and followed his knight out of the throne room. All in all, it could have been worse. He could have gotten his ass beaten again.Or another monologue.

"By the way, where do we keep our geese?"

[electricpentacle]

👀 gloryhammer, for the ask game?

Blorbo: Zargothrax, my overly dramatic literally omnicidal space wizard beloved.

Scrunkly: Angus XIII, the soul of a golden retriever puppy in the body of a himbo with an Artifact Of Ultimate Power

Scrimblo Bimblo: Dreadlord Proletius, Zargothrax's eyeliner-rocking Emotional Support Minion. Who is awesome and deserves all the fanart. And Paul Temple so loves being a villain.

Glup Shitto: The Goblin King. Excuse me sir WHERE did you find that portal-opening crystal and WHY are you so cheerful about giving Mx Thrax there the power to set the known universe on fire? Is it that perhaps this universe is NOT, in fact, where you keep all your stuff? I have headcanons.

Poor little meow meow: ...Zargothrax again, I guess? Faves don't get much more problematic than feeding the galaxy to an Elder God.

Plinko Horse: Ralathor. This depressed stick suffers so elegantly.

Eeby Deeby: ...not going into that here for fear of violent cancellation but you can probably guess.

[borealopelta]

🦅 + dreadlord proletious

more on proletius and his pets: his eagle!!!! I don't know where the knights of crail found eagles big enough to ride into battle - or if they're just really really tiny people - but they have battle eagles for sure! and proletius hangs out with his all the time. they're friends! his eagle is called prometheus which is a liiiitle tasteless considering the og prometheus' history with eagles but still! its a cool name. and the soft feathers under prometheus' wings are perfect for cuddling into on a cold night when they need to set up camp :) and proletius gives him little beak scritches when he's being good

[general-grey]

as result of today im now completely in love with Dreadlord Proletius, he has SUCH a jolly cute smile even though he's an evil death knight i wanna pinch his cheeks

he's baby i will protect his smile

[chaotic-neutral-wizard]

Things I liked about LFBTGTV

And lo, its been a week since the realise of the album and I have lost count of how many time I have listened to it. So I'm gonna point out all the things I like from each song.

1. Into The Terrorvortex Of Kor-Virliath

"Chaos will reing eternal"

Epic orchesta

I could identify the part for the Hootsman, really obvious here, and the part for Angus. Yet I still can't identify the queue for the others character so I will have to put more attention here

2. The Siege of Dunkeld (In Hoots We Trust)

Powerfull start

Latin stuff

"Is this a twisted dimension"

The drums fill at 1:15

Fecal demons and robotic astral zombies

Peseants

"IN HOOTS WE TRUST"

The melody of Anstruther's Dark Prophecy

A powerless Angus

"KNEEL BEFORE YOUR GOD"

3. Masters Of The Galaxy

"Far to the east"

Great chrous

"Mighty indeed"

"WORKSHIP OR BLEED"

Evil laugh

The knife of evil

The bass part before Zargothrax speaks

Go slaught some peseants

Amazing solo

"The distroyers of reality"

"Knights of evil arise"

4. The Land Of Unicorns

Nice riff

"To the land of unicorns"

Ralathor appiers

Keyboard solo, yes!

5. Power Of The Laser Dragon Fire

Do you rember

Hmm a jetpack

"Now lost i another galaxy, aaaahhhh"

Bad ass solo

6. Legendary Enchanted Jetpack

Quest!

"And in my dream I am flying"

The voice on this chorous seems so peacefull to me for some reason...

The part with the horns section

7. Gloryhammer

GLORY! HAMMER!

"I have arrived into space oh yeah"

"Laser Powered Gobling Smasher"

"The time has come to regaing our fallen pride once more"

The solo is sooo good

Epic song about charching a hammer

Just love the drums in the song

8. Hootsforce

Time to fight!

This song is like nuclear fire, pure energy

Chorus seems like a tongue twister

WE ARE THE HOOTS FORCE

Flying submarines

Can't listen to this with out the urge to jump around

The last five seconds are amazing

9. Battle For Eternity

"I am the final defender"

Have you ever...

Fist time listening, I felt hope then the second time I just felt sadness

10. The Fires Of Ancient Cosmic Destiny

The strings after the intro

Nuclear justice and no more dark knight of Crail

Unbelievable they still have peasants to kill although they are being slaughter since the beginning lol

The part at 3:47 has the same melody as In The Land Of Unicorns (hope not to be mistaken)

"And at the vanguard of this terrible host stood the Grandmaster himself... Dreadlord Proletius"

Evil laugh again

"Worship my omnipotence!"

[III: Return Of The Astral Demigod Of Unst] is just pure epicness

"Alright Zargothrax"

The good guys won yay!

Oh nooooo!

Angus had been impaled by the Knife Of Evil

Liquid dust

Final sacrife

"Dicend into HELL"

"To save the galaxy is your mighty destiny"

Once more we get a cliffhanger at the final

The music on this album is so incredible and I don't have the knowledge to properly describe it... so yeah, there are more things to discover while listening provably it will take me a couple of years to get all the stuff that is going on but I think that is a good thing... Yet also haven't given a listen to all the synphonics versions so probably there the details are more noticeable... maybe...

Each song is an opportunity to live an epic adventure, and also if you don't catch the lyrics at first the music is really good at giving us the hint of what is going on.

So well... that's all

[uupiic]

Dreadlord Proletius: Do you ever get that little voice in your head that tells you, what you're about to do will get you in lots of trouble?

Zargothrax: Nope.

Dreadlord Proletius: ...

Dreadlord Proletius: That actually explains a lot...

[uupiic]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Gloryhammer (Band) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Ser Proletius (Gloryhammer) Additional Tags: that's Dreadlord Proletius to you!, Giant Eagles, Dreadlord is having a positively great time, everybody else? not so much, rural villages, unconventional methods of persuading people to join your army, Not RPF, the regular GH disclaimer applies, let's play Can You Guess The Movie I Got The Idea From! Series: Part 1 of No Rest for Dreadlord Proletius Summary:

Having a bit of a hard time convincing people to join the Forces of Evil? This one simple trick will blow your mind!

__________________

You know WHAT?

Since Ser Proletius (in any rendition, be the man good, or evil) gets so little love in this fandom, here’s this one separately from the big post.

[uupiic]

Annoy Ralathor hours: all day every day, 24/7, plus an additional secret hour you didn't even know existed :) A sister (brother?) series to No Rest for Dreadlord Proletius

actually, this is probably my favourite series I have ever started

[uupiic]

Ralathor: You're smiling, did something good happen?

Zargothrax: Can't I just smile because I feel like it?

Dreadlord Proletius: Angus tripped and fell in the parking lot.

[uupiic]

You know WHAT?

In honour of a certain keyboard player apparently being a tosser about fan fiction again, here’s a list of my favourite ones (that I wrote)

:)

The One That Got Away - with Angus I, Proletius, Hoots, and Iona - Reverse!AU

Of knights, barbarians, unicorns, and spilled milk - Hoots and Proletius - Reverse!AU

The Sun - Ser Proletius POV, with Angus XIII; Hoots and Ralathor make appearances

Responsibility - Ralathor and Zargothrax

Something, something Auchtermuchty again - Dreadlord Proletius, Zargothrax, and Zachary (OC)

The Dark Lord of Dundee - Ralathor and Zargothrax; Ralathor stans are NOT gonna have a good time :’(

The Void Demands Chicken - Zargothrax and Kor-Virliath

OUTRAGEOUS! - Ralathor and Zargothrax

A Leafy Problem - Zargothrax; Ralathor makes an appearance whether he would have liked to or not :’)

*unfortunately, all of them are under the archive lock due to the AI being on the loose on AO3, but an account is literally one e-mail, or a friend who can give you an invite, away (invitations can be accessed and distributed from the user profile, look for a big button that says ‘’Invitations’’ on it. I’m mentioning this because I have NOT seen anyone mention their actual location on all those ‘’get an account’’ posts)

[uupiic]

I know what I said, but the sad truth is Gloryhammer would never be able to do a collab with Saltatio Mortis, for the single reason that the lads would wipe the floor with Zargothrax (and Dreadlord Proletius) in the first 30 seconds. I'm sorry.

(I'm kidding. I would LOVE to see a collab between the both, actually. A real one. If only for the bagpipes, damn it. GH's gimmick is ''Scotland but make it magic'', ffs.)

[magic-dragon-s-keep]

Zargothrax: Look what you’ve done to my peonies!

Angus XIII: They’re marigolds!

Dreadlord Proletius: Sweet Hoots, he’s right! They are marigolds!

Zargothrax: I may not know my flowers,

Zargothrax: BUT I KNOW A BITCH WHEN I SEE ONE