#FOR MARIAH AS WELL ;W;

[untimelyambition]

curt and kim being dance partners in all the scenes at the castle is something that is so special to me

[caramelmochacrow]

"You know that I want you And you know that I need you"

[youremyheaven]

Vedic Astrology Observations

1. Punarvasus tend to be very spiritual if not religious. They find peace in prayer. Another thing I've noticed is that they are very sexually conservative (probably because of their cat yoni). Mariah Carey, Punarvasu Moon was a virgin when she married her first husband and waited until marriage to be intimate with her second husband as well. She was engaged to James Packer for 18 months and they reportedly never had a physical relationship.

Miranda Kerr, Punarvasu Moon was in a relationship with Evan Spiegel for 3 years and waited until marriage. Drew Barrymore, Punarvasu Moon has said that she's been celibate since her divorce in 2016.

2. Mariah Carey, Punarvasu Moon speaking of the nature of light & time , her memoir has multiple chapters titled with light-related names and even sooo many of her songs , including Butterfly (Punarvasus are connected to butterflies)

3. Moksha gana nakshatras embody the trickster archetype. They also often argue or provoke people simply for the heck of it. 2/3 Moon ruled naks (Rohini & Hasta) are Moksha gana and it makes sense as to why they fuck with people just because they can, they have nothing to gain from it and it serves no purpose, they're evil for the heck of it. They'll go to any length to ruin you even if they ruin themselves in the process.

Moksha means liberation in Sanskrit (Sanskrit is a classical language like Latin that is pretty much only used in a scholarly context) and is one of 4 purusharthas or motivations assigned to the 27 naks. The others are artha (wealth) kama (pleasure) and dharma (duty). Moksha would be located at the very top of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, which means an individual with Moksha gana naks has transcended all the other base level motivations of accumulating wealth, seeking pleasure and doing one's duty. What is left to do now? If an individual is evolved, they actually seek liberation through their spirituality but if they are not, not only are they unbothered by any ordinary human motives, they lack the ability to devote themselves to anything ordinary because they simply dont care about getting a job or building a house or whatever. this means they also kind of exist beyond normal social norms?? go up against a Moksha gana native/Moon dominant person and the kind of arguments they'll use against you will reveal this nature of theirs. like they will have zero issue using your every vulnerability and insecurity against you just to win an argument or put you down. they hate to look "weak" so they will tear you apart just because they can, with no regard for any history you share. there are people who defend this by saying "oh well i was mad" babygirl everybody gets mad, but if someone isnt raising their voice, being petty or singling you out and bringing up your past to make you crumble, its not because they're incapable of it, its because they have principles.

Moksha gana naks love to play devil's advocate.

4. Rahuvians have bad memory, they probably repeat the same stories in different ways every few weeks lol

5. Saturnian women often marry billionaires according to Claire Nakti and I recently found some more examples of that:

** Mariah Carey, UBP Sun was engaged to Australian billionaire, James Packer who used to date Miranda Kerr, Pushya Rising (both these women are also Punarvasu Moon), Miranda is now married to the CEO of Snapchat.

** Lisa Manobal, UBP Sun is dating Frederic Arnault, a French billionaire

** Elle Macpherson, UBP Sun was in a relationship with Arpad Busson with whom she had 2 kids (he's not a billionaire but he does have a net worth of $500 million)

6. Nominative determinism, literally "name-driven outcome", is the hypothesis that people tend to gravitate towards areas of work that reflect their names.

but i thought i'd use it in the context of astrology and how most people are subconsciously given names that reflect their nakshatras

ex: Angelina Jolie

the name Angelina is an expansion of Angela which is derived from the Greek word Angelos which means "Angel" or "messenger". Angelina has Revati Moon which is a deva ("godly" nakshatra) and Jolie is the French word for "pretty" and Angelina has Venus in 1h and is Pushya Rising (these were two of the biggest beauty indicators according to Claire's research)

(its so cute to me that her name is literally Angel Pretty bc damn right she is)

Yara Shahidi (Revati Moon)- Yara is the name of a water spirit and in Portuguese it means "Water lady" (Yara has stated that her name means one who is close to your heart, but names can have several different meanings) and Shahidi means "witness" in Persian. I feel like all of that really ties together with Revati being in pisces rashi and the last nakshatra that is "witness" to everything else etc

[bartxnhood]

you belong with me | l.r.h

luke hemmings x fem!songwriter!reader

summary: after luke finds out just what your song was about, his life was flipped upside down.

warnings: unrequited love, break up, lots of crying, happy ending (who cheered)

wc: 6k

a/n: this is a part two to this so be sure to read that before !

requests open

not proofread

Copyright © 2023 bartxnhood. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format.

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you sigh as you put your earbuds in to tune out the sound of the man in the front seat belting the lyrics of ‘we belong together’ by mariah carey with the brunette in the passenger seat.

you couldn’t help but let your eyes linger on the man. his blond, curly hair, just long enough to rest above his eyes, the stubble on his face that hadn’t been shaven in at least two weeks, that pointy nose that was sculpted by the gods, and those ocean blue eyes.

you loved looking into those eyes.

he was your best friend, he was the one constant in your life and now he feels like a stranger.

you’re taken out of your trance when calum nudges your shoulder. “you okay?” he mouths. you nod quickly offering him a smile, looking back down to the book you were reading.

calum sighs, he reaches for his phone and types up a quick message.

-“you sure? you were staring again, y/n..”

-“i’m fine, cal. swear.”

calum huffs but leaves it at that. the two in the front continue belting out the lyrics and calum keeps an eye on you for the rest of the drive.

you should’ve said no, you wanted to say no and stay home where at least you’d be free of the torture. but, with calum being calum he begged you until you agreed. just like he did when he convinced you to open up for them on tour in the early days.

if you had said no then, maybe none of this would’ve happened.

”luke..i..” you wiped your eyes, it was so hard for you to hear that when you had spent all your life with him only to lose him in the end. “i’m sorry.”

luke shook his head, “no, i’m sorry.”

he stands there, looking at you with sorrowful eyes. he can feel himself tearing up but the moment is interrupted by sierra busting through the door. “there you are!” she says, walking over to your side, her hand finding your arm. “are you okay, hon?” her eyes soften, noticing your tears.

you don’t say anything but you nod, looking away while the girl side hugs you. “did luke bother you? i told him specifically to not take away your spotlight tonight” she says in a teasing matter and you laugh softly. but luke doesn’t seem too amused.

“okay, well the guys are ready so whenever you’re ready, luke” sierra says, removing herself from your side then going back inside the club.

“so, what should we do?” luke ask, watching as you wipe your eyes once more. you shrug, “nothing, you’re with sierra. my feelings mean nothing anymore.”

your eyes flutter open as you feel someone shaking you gently, “y/n, wake up we made it” you look at calum then begin stretching out as you look around. you see the tall palm trees as you can smell the breeze of saltwater wafting in from the open doors.

you step out of the vehicle and begin stretching while the others, ashton, michael, and crystal arrive in the other car as you gather your items from the backseat and pack them into your carry on, luke has already begun unpacking the car. “here’s your bags, y/n” he says, you don’t skip a beat to bend down to take your bags and head for the entrance of the beach house and not bat an eye at him.

calum and ashton shared a room, the two couples had their own room, so you were left alone. not that you minded at all, it gave you time to think and have you time. if it ever got too overwhelming, you had your own space.

after spending some time unpacking, you decided to head out of your room and put your toiletries in the bathroom. as you stepped out, you saw everyone gathered around the island in the kitchen, sierra jutting down whatever the other guys were saying. “oh! y/n!” ashton announces which then causes the others to look your way. “we’re making a grocery list. is there anything specific you need?” he adds.

you walk over to the island, standing across from them. “well, what do you have down so far?”

“we have breakfast foods…um some stuff for dinner for the nights we don’t eat out…snacks…” sierra begins listing off everything she had written down with a point of the pen.

“sounds like you got everything then” you hum, with a nod. “one more thing” she adds, “do you care to go with me?”

you look at the sierra across from you and smile softly, “sure. is crystal going too?” the brunette shakes her head, “her and mike went to the beach already. just us two” she smiles awkwardly. “oh, that’s fine. let me get changed and we can head out” you force a smile as you walk out of the kitchen to your bedroom.

the drive to the supermarket was quiet, your eyes glued to the road while sierra did whatever she was doing. given the circumstances, there was a little tension between the two of you and it was very hard for you to deal with.

you really liked sierra, she was a kind soul who saw the good in a lot of things. she had always been there to cheer you up, and you had considered her your best friend. but after that night at the open mic, everything changed.

the drive felt like it lasted forever, but eventually, you arrived at the supermarket.

pushing the shopping cart through the isles while sierra was looking at the list, you occasionally would drop some items in the basket that you wanted for yourself or, you and sierra both agreed on it.

“i really miss hanging out with you..” sierra says, standing at the end of the shopping cart in the drink aisle with you.

you look at her, smiling sadly. “i know, i miss it too. just..work has been..work” you try laughing it off. “i can help, you know. i write songs too” she says. you nod, dropping a case of wine in the cart. “i know, i just don’t want to bother you” you shrug, and begin pushing the cart until the next isle.

you hear sierra sigh, giving you the‘you sound ridiculous’. look. “y/n, it won't bother me! you’re my friend and i’d love to help out” you chuckle softly, “okay fine. after this trip we’ll work together.” you cave, and sierra claps her hands quietly with a big smile on her lips.

as the two of you stroll down the isle of chips and other snacks, your eyes catch the package of a certain snack you hadn’t seen in years. “oh my god!” you announce, letting go of the cart to pickup the bag. “what is it?” the other girl asks. “look” you say, showing the bag to her. “i haven’t seen these in years!”

memories wash over you like a wave as you stare at the packaging. “what are they?” she questions. “these are luke’s favorite! back on tour, we used to keep stashes of these in the bus” you laugh, grabbing an extra bag to also put it in the cart. “we could eat up to two or three bags in a day, the other guys would always get onto us..” you laugh, reminiscing.

“oh really?” sierra didn’t know this. she didn’t know his favorite snacks or drinks. she didn’t know how he would bounce his leg when he had a lyric on his mind and needed to write it down, she didn’t know that when he picked at his face subconsciously it meant he was worried. she didn’t know luke’s favorite movie, she didn’t know that he only wears certain rings, rings you got him. she didn’t know that when luke got quiet it meant he was thinking hard about something. she doesn’t know that luke keeps a song journal with some of his deepest feelings.

but you do.

you know all of this.

by the time you and sierra had arrived at the beach house, the sky was already turning dark. you had taken a couple of bags out of the back and began heading inside. “guys, we need help” you announce, dropping the bags on the kitchen counter.

you turn around see the other five standing up from their seats and going outside, and you follow suit.

it took you, sierra, and the other five to haul the rest of the groceries back inside and to unpack. but thankfully, it was only one trip.

while sierra was handing you boxes of cereal, luke hollered, “oh my god!” everyone whips their heads around, startled by his abrupt yell. “what is it?” ashton asks, and luke grinned holding up the bag of snacks before ripping into them letting the smell waft into his nostrils, letting the memories flood back. “it’s the snacks we used to eat!”

you smile, seeing his reaction as he reaches in for a handful, stuffing it in his mouth. “where did you find these? i thought they discontinued them!” he says with a mouth full.

you laugh, walking over and take a couple for yourself. “dont talk with your mouth full, and don’t eat em all because once that bag is gone, you’re donezo. the other one is mine” you taunt earning a frown the from curly-haired man.

sierra watches, she sees how his eye has lit up. she sees and you were suddenly beaming with happiness upon seeing lukes smile.

the next evening, everyone had wanted to go out to dinner to celebrate your second album as a release party. you, however, wanted to stay back as you weren't feeling it but ashton practically demanded and dragged you out of bed and told you to get ready. “okay, okay!! i’ll get ready..” you groan as ashton pushes you into the bathroom, you can hear a victory laugh from him as the door shuts.

you look up, seeing yourself in the mirror knowing you should be excited to go out and celebrate the release of your second album. you had a good following and people who were anticipating your release. but you just weren’t feeling it, probably because all of the songs were about your best friend.

but, you just weren’t looking forward to dinner or the release party.

you step out of your bedroom smoothing out your dress, which is a dark navy blue. you see everyone else standing in the kitchen or sitting on the sofa in their outfits. the guys in their suits, and crystal and sierra in a dress similar to yours, but crystals was red, and sierra was black.

“ready? oh? you’re matching with luke!” ashton laughs, as he stands up from the sofa, pointing to luke’s tie.

you look at luke’s tie, feeling extra awkward now, “oh..” you say. “you okay?” calum asks, “yup, everyone ready?” you change the subject, and they all nod and head out for the night.

all seven of you sat together at a large table at a nice restaurant, ashton and calum had planned it nicely and were sure that the table was in a private area.

you had already finished appetizers when michael spoke up. “do you remember when we first toured?” he asks.

“yeah..” calum and ashton say, you nod. “what was your favorite part of tour?” he asks. everyone falls silent while they think, “definitely all the drinking” calum answers, you laugh and shake your head, “you were a nightmare.”

“definitely” luke agrees with you.

“oh, soundchecks were fun. messing with managers” michael answers.

“i liked songwriting, i wrote some of my favorite songs on tour with you guys.” you smile, remembering all the good times. “performing was kinda cool too” you laugh.

everyone smiles, you hear calums ‘aw’ and you just roll your eyes.

“what about you, luke?” ashton asks.

luke thinks for a moment, but he isn’t too sure how to answer it. “i think i enjoyed performing the most, it was good experience.” michael nods, “true” he agrees.

then the table falls silent again when entrees arrive. everyone seems to be enjoying their food, until, crystal asks you, “y/n, who did you write your songs about?”

you look up from your plate, you feel your ears turning hot. you always hated this question because how could you tell them it was about the man who was sitting just a few feet from you?

“well..” you begin, finishing your bite. “it’s not really about anyone. it’s just a feeling you have” you try your best to come up with something believable. “that way, anyone can relate to what i release.” you smile, but you feel luke’s eyes lingering on your figure.

you look out of the corner of your eye and confirm your suspicions. he was looking at you.

“ah, that makes sense!” crystal smiles, “your work is incredible.”

“thank you, crys”

it was nearing midnight now, closer to your release time. instead of the restaurant you had moved to a club just a few streets over which was also set up for your release party.

ashton was by your side as you enter, letting the couples go in first, then you, ashton, and calum. you look around and see some old faces and friends.

“do you want anything?” calum asks as the two of you stand at the bar. you shake your head, “nah, i’ll pass” you smile while taking a seat at the bar. calum nods, respecting your wishes as he orders himself a drink. you sit there playing on your phone to pass the time until it hits midnight. throughout the night you have people coming up to you and congratulating you on your album, and you just smile and nod. soon enough, midnight rolls around and you hear cheers and ashton appears from what seems like thin air with a cake while congratulating you. you smile, standing up from the bar stool.

“congratulations on your album, y/n/n! we are so proud of you and we can’t wait to see where life takes you!” ashton says, you feel yourself getting emotional seeing all of your friends around you. “we love you!” you hear michael cheer which causes you to giggle before blowing out the candles.

as you leaned in to blow out the candles everything felt like it happened so quickly. a very, very drunk man showed up out of nowhere yelling profanities at your before pushing the cake on you. “and fuck you, you whore-“ he continued until a someone interfered. you see luke out of the corner of your eye, yelling at him to shut up and throwing a few punches in.

you didn’t move, feeling so embarrassed. you look down seeing all the cake on your skin and dress.

sierra and crystal rush to your side and take you away to the bathroom to get you cleaned up.

you were perched up on the counter, both sierra and crystal were trying their best to clean your dress and fix your makeup but you had already started crying.

“why would someone do that?” you ask, feeling so small.

“i don’t know, hon..” sierra sighs, as she wipes off the icing on your face. “people are just jerks..” crystals adds.

thankfully the cake didn’t get on your dress as much as it was on your face. the two other girls let you borrow their makeup once all of the cake was gone so you could try to enjoy the rest of your day.

“thank you guys, i don’t know what i would do you without you” you smile, hugging the two girls before heading back to the club floor.

you spot luke at the bar with michael and walk up, standing beside michael. you order yourself a shot of whatever came to mind first. “you’re drinking? i thought you hated it” michael asks, eyeing as you downed the shot.

“yeah, well, after the fiasco that just happened, i need to let loose for the night”

luke should’ve stopped you after your fifth shot, but he didn’t. he let you drink and he was now paying the price for doing so.

luke knew you better than anyone else, he knew you hated drinking because of the way it made you act and how you felt afterward.

he stares as you dance with an old friend and when he starts touching you a little too much, luke saw red.

he didn’t even realize what he was doing until you were yelling his name. he lets go of the guy and turns to you, “are you okay?” he asks. “luke?! what the fuck?!” you yell, stumbling back a little, and luke catches you. “you’re drunk” luke says, “obviously” you slur followed by a sigh as you finish the rest of your drink.

“okay, i think you’re done. we should head home” he suggested while taking your hand and leading you through the crowd of people to gather up the rest of your group.

you don’t protest, in fact, you are excited to head back home and sleep away the night and hopefully forget everything that happened.

the night has come to an end, and you all had finally returned to the beach house. the seven of you all sat around a bonfire talking about life and what they want in the future. you were seated a few feet from the group, admiring the stars, and how clearly you could see them.

the sudden hit of a soccer ball caught your attention and you followed the direction where the ball had rolled from and your eyes landed on calum and ashton. “cmon” calum says, extending his hand you want to say no because you can feel a headache forming, but calum beats you. “you can’t say no. get up”

you groan, letting him take your hand and drag you in the sand to kick the soccer ball around before all of you head in for the night.

luke didn’t know how long he was watching you. but what he did know, is just how bad he wished he was the one you making laugh like calum does. luke wants to be the one helping you from the sand like ashton does.

his body longs for your touch as his heart yearns for your love.

sierra watched as he was eyeing you, he looked at you like you were the only person in the world. he was starstruck when it came to you, his y/n. everyone saw it except maybe you, and himself.

he’d never admit it though, for the sake of sierra.

but what he didn’t know is that she knew she would never replace you in his heart. luke didn’t know she had already made up her mind about their relationship.

“luke..” she speaks up while leaning in, in hopes of getting his attention. luke is pulled out of whatever trance he was in and finally looks at the girl. “yeah?” he asks, looking as if he had just come off cloud nine after hearing your laugh. “we need to talk.”

luke nods, “is everything okay?” he asks, turning his body to fully face his girlfriend. as sierra is about to begin speaking she is interrupted by ashton, who had his arm around your shoulder. “you all coming?” luke’s eyes land on you, naturally. he sees that you didn’t even bother to look at him, he looked disappointed. “we’ll catch up later.”

luke watches as you disappear over the sand dunes and his eyes finally land on sierra. “what’s up?” he asks, noticing sierras blank expression.

she takes in a long breath, trying to find the right words without hurting his feelings. “i don’t think this is gonna work out.. between us” she confesses, feeling the tears threatening to spill in her eyes. “what..? why..?” asks luke.

“because you don’t love me.”

“what? sierra, i do-“

“no, luke” she cuts him off, smiling softly. “you don’t, and it’s okay.” she takes his hand and holds it softly. “i should’ve known i couldn’t take her place in your heart.” “what..?”

“y/n.” sierra answers, fighting back the tears. “i see the way you look at her, you have that look in your eyes every time they land on her. you love her and you need to admit that to yourself.” and it was true, but luke had tried and thought that he had hid his feelings for you, but he was unsuccessful.

“i can’t be her, i can’t force you to love me, luke.”

“sierra..” he sighs, feeling ashamed.

“luke..look at me” she takes her hands, cupping his chin so he would look at her. “last night, when you came to her rescue i knew in that moment..”

“it’s okay, luke. we just aren’t meant to be. you deserve someone who can make you happy, and she does.”

her thumb caresses his cheek, admiring all of his beauty as a tear slips from her eyes. “i’m sorry that i can’t be the one in your heart.” she presses a kiss on his nose before standing up from her seat, leaving luke alone on the beach that night.

the next morning, your eyes are met with the excruciating pain in your temples as your eyes flutter open, meeting with the sunlight peaking in from the curtains. groaning, you throw your arm over your eyes to try to help with the light and you are reminded why you hated drinking so much.

you heard a few soft knocks at your door, “come in” you announce groggily. calum peeks his head in, “hey, we’re all heading out. you gonna join?” he asks. you remove your arm from your eyes and barely open them. you ask,“what time is it?” and calum laughs quietly . “it’s after five. you’ve slept most of the day.”

you sigh, “i’ll just stay back.” you answer and hear a quiet “okay” from calum as he exits your bedroom, closing the door behind him.

you lie there for a while before eventually getting up to shower, in hopes it would make you feel a little better.

meanwhile, the others had all gone out bowling per the request of michael and ashton even though it was pretty late in the day.

calum wanted to stay back, he hated the idea of going out without you because he knew how bad your hangovers could be but he went, not wanting ashton to third wheel alone.

when they arrived at the bowling alley, it was pretty busy, they found a lane and started a few games. but everyone seemed to be off, calum couldn’t put his finger on it, maybe it was the fact that you weren’t here, or the fact they were all still a tad hungover. so, with only a few games in, they all decided to leave and head back to the rental house to watch a movie and make dinner instead.

when they all arrive back, they do their own thing. crystal and michael head to the patio for a couple of drinks, ashton goes to the living room, calum makes a b-line to the kitchen, sierra goes to her bedroom, and luke attempts to look for you. hoping to clear the air between the two of you.

“wheres y/n?” luke asks, noticing the door to your bedroom was wide open and you were nowhere else to be found. ashton looks around, shrugging as he plops down on the sofa. “maybe she’s at the beach” the drummer suggests. “she didn’t text me.” calum announces from the kitchen, looking for some snacks. luke checks his phone, sending you a message but when you don’t reply he decides to look for you himself.

you sat on the beach, your feet in the cool sand while you were scribbling away in your journal, this whole trip you felt so trapped and so empty. feeling as if you had lost your best friend over something so stupid you tried to push away those feelings, but in doing so you were jeopardizing your friendship with luke and sierra. pushing them out of your life pretty much.

you were so engrossed with your writing, you didn’t even notice the tall blond heading your way.

“there you are!” he announces, jogging to your side. “i was looking everywhere for you!” you look up from your book, seeing luke and immediately shutting it. “well, you found me” you answer, a bit harsher. you hear a sigh from luke, “y/n, are we ever going to talk this out?” he asks, you stand up from the shore and dust the sand off of you. “there’s nothing to talk about, luke.”

actually, there was. you wanted to scream at him, you wanted to pour your heart out and tell him how much you loved him. how your heart aches for him, how your body yearns for his touch.

but you don’t, you simply begin walking off but he stops you. “y/n.” he reaches out and grabs your wrist gently.

“why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, and once you turn around he drops his arms to his side but his look is fierce. he was staring through you. “you left me in the dark, y/n..how was i supposed to know?”

you groan, letting your head fall back. “luke, i’m sorry. okay?” you raise your head and look at him. “and this isn’t all on me, either. you didn’t tell me your feelings either.”

“well who did you think all of those songs we wrote together were about?!” luke asks, raising his voice slightly.

“i don’t know luke! i was too worried that if i said something wrong or if i slipped up i would lose my best friend!” you tell, the pain filled your chest and you felt yourself explode like a shaken soda bottle.

“i was worried that if i made the impression that i even had the slightest crush on you, you’d leave me, luke. you were the one thing in my life that kept me grounded. you were my everything, you were the air in my lungs, my heart was beating for you. so, i’m sorry, luke that i maybe didn’t catch the hint. i was scared.”

luke blinks, his heart racing as you begin spilling out all your thoughts.

“why?” was all he asked.

“because i thought i wasn’t good enough for you, luke. i was never the pretty one, i wasn’t like the other girls. i was always the one who people settled for. and when sierra came into the picture, it was worse. when you started seeing her, i would see the way you looked at her. and it hurt me so bad, lu. because i wanted you to look at me like that, i want you to want me like you want her.” you didn’t even notice the tears flowing down your cheeks.

“what?” in an effort to understand what he had just heard, his blue eyes were filled with devastation . did you really mean what you said? “y/n…did you really feel like that? i made you feel like that?” he feels his heart breaking into small pieces. luke stares at you intently as you speak, he wants to reach out and wrap you in his arms. he wants to take away all your pain, he thinks it’s unfair you have been suffering all this time.

“you’re a rockstar, luke. of course i felt that way, i couldn’t compete with all the girls who threw themselves at you when we were on tour, and then when sierra came into the picture everything just shattered..” you wipe away the tears using the sleeves of your shirt. you had told yourself you didn’t want to break down in front of him like this, but it was inevitable.

you sigh, trying to compose yourself as luke takes a few steps closer, and when his hand touches yours, you feel the wave of sadness hit you again.

“i see the way she looks at you luke, she’s so in love with you and it kills me.” you feel the lump in your throat, and your lip quivers, but you continue. “i can’t stand to be around you two, but i can’t stand to be away from you, because i still love you so much, luke.”

his hand touches your cheek, his thumb wiping away the tears staining your cheek. for a moment, when you look at him you could only wish he was yours. you felt at home when touched you so gingerly, and how his ocean eyes looked over you like you were the only girl in the world.

your hand reaches up, takes his, and removes it from your face. “you two deserve to be together. she loves you luke, i can push my feelings down. i can’t do that to her.” you say, ready to act like this never happened and you would go back to how things were.

abruptly, luke speaks. “she broke up with me.”

your heart sinks, and you feel dizzy. were you hearing things? “what..?” you say, just above a whisper. “last night” he continues, sighing as he did.

“during the bonfire, i guess i..i was staring at you and she went on this rant about how she knows that i love you.” now, you see luke’s eyes brimming with tears. his voice wavers, he sniffles once trying to suppress the tears. “and she’s right, i do love you.” he admits. “luke..i..”

“no. please, just listen to me.” the blond cuts you off, his eyes closing as he takes a deep breath. “i can’t do this anymore, i can’t pretend to love someone else when im still so in love with you.”

luke continues, his hands balled by his side. “i feel so complete with you around, and i can’t take it when you act like we aren’t close. i can’t keep pretending.”

“you are my everything, and it hurts me that i can’t be with you.” his hand is over his heart, feeling the aching feeling he has been living with since that night. “i dream of you, all i do is dream of you. i can’t get you out of my head. so, please don’t push me away. let me love you.”

your mind was racing as you stared at him wide-eyed. unable to process the words he had uttered, “i can’t do this right now..” you take a few steps back, “just..” you shake your head leaving luke stranded on the beach.

luke watches your figure disappear. his chest tightens, thinking he had just lost you for good now. he thinks you blame yourself for his breakup. when you walk away he can’t help but think you hate him more than you already did.

luke sits down in the sand, facing the ocean now. he wants to scream at the horizon, he wants the world, the gods, the universe to know just how much he loves you.

he can’t bare the thought of losing you again.

luke has so much love for you, he knows everything about you. he wants to know the things that maybe you have kept hidden from him. he wants you to want him back. luke wants to make up for all of his mistakes, fix things, and give you the love you deserve.

but, if you don’t feel like that…he would have to respect your decision.

you enter the house, seeing ashton on the sofa with calum with a few beers in their hands. “oh, hey, there you are. luke went looking for you” calum says once you enter the door. “yeah, he found me” you say, setting your book on the table and scanning the room. “wheres sierra?” you ask, ashton looks up from his phone and says, “her bedroom, but she was acting kinda weird today..” you nod, “okay, thanks”

you stand in front of the door and mentally prepare yourself for possibly the worst fight you’d ever have. you knock a few times, “sierra?” you announce letting her know it was you. you heard a soft, “come in” and you twisted the door non letting yourself in.

you see her figure sitting on the twin bed closest to the window, you walk over to sit on the edge and that’s when you notice the tears staining her cheeks.

“sierra..” you say, as you look at her. but she smiles sadly, “i’m not mad at you, if that’s the reason your here” her voice was cracking and it was very obvious she had been crying for some time. “i..” you start, handing your head. “i’m so sorry.” you mutter, feeling your lip quiver.

you had been crying most of this trip. you wish you could just get a grip and stop acting so childish.

“stop..” she says reaching for your hand. “it’s okay, i knew. i’ve known it since the beginning. i knew what i was getting myself into. but…it still hurts.” you nod, wrapping your arms around her. “i never wanted this to happen.” you sigh, feeling her arms pat your back. “i know, i don’t blame you…” she says quietly. sierra knows she couldn’t take away what the two of you had. she had to be smart and realize if she continued the relationship she would only hurt herself in the future. she couldn’t lie to herself when the truth was right in front of her.

“y/n, what you two have is real. it’s more than what we had, i can’t pretend to be you and i can’t make him love me like he loves you. i want the both of you happy, and if me cutting things off with him i’ll do it.” she says, and pulls back to look at you. “you’re my best friend, i don’t want this to ruin us, okay?” she adds, and you nod. “did he tell you how he felt?” you nod again, a laugh escaping your lips. “andddd?” she drawls, smiling. “i left him on the beach”

“y/n!” she playfully hits your arm, “please, go get that man before you lose him again” she demands, pushing you off the bed. “go!” you laugh and exit the bedroom.

luke sits on the beach, watching the waves crash onto the sand. he wonders if he just lost everything in less than twenty-four hours. he wonders where he went wrong, how he let you slip away, why he wasn’t honest with you…or himself. luke is pissed at himself because maybe, just maybe, if he had been more open with his feelings and emotions maybe this wouldn’t have happened.

he is racking his brain for the right words to say to fix what he had messed up so badly.

“luke” you say, pulling him out of his deep thought. he looks up, his eyes landing on your figure. he feels a warmth in his chest, but he doesn’t get his hopes up. “you came back?”

you nod, as you sit down next to him. “of course, i did.” you say, looking out at the ocean.

“y/n, im sorry. i didn’t mean for all of that to just spill out, i-“ you turn to him, stopping him as he tried explaining himself. “dont” you shake your head.

“just hold me, please.”

time passed quicker than you wanted it to. you sit between luke’s legs, his arms wrapped around your waist and his head resting against your shoulders. you both wanted to watch the sunset since it was your last full night there. neither you nor luke said anything since you came back. you were simply just enjoying each other's company.

“lu?”

“hmm?”

“when did you realize you love me?”

luke thinks for a moment, he recalls the last show of their first headlining tour. he remembers the outfit you wore for your set and he remembers that in that moment is when he first realized his feelings for you.

“do you remember our first headlining tour?” you nod, your eyes still on the ocean. “i do..” luke smiles, “that’s when. i remember seeing your face on that stage and everything shifted..” he answered.

you smile to yourself, recalling that night. you were on cloud nine, you remember the hug and how much you loved being in luke’s arms, just like you were now. “you there?” he whispers. you nod, “i am. just..reminiscing.”

luke pulls you closer, and he squeezes you, afraid to lose you again. he traces soft circles on your arms as he gets lost in thought.

“you there?” you chuckle, and you feel him nod against your shoulder.

“i just… i don’t want to lose you again. i don’t want to mess up this again. please let me make this right between us..” he says.

“lu, i love you. and that’s why i came back. i want us to work out…i want…us..” you speak quietly, the ocean crashing on the shore is in the background.

luke presses a kiss on your neck then, your cheek and finally, your lips. “i promise, y/n. i’ll give you the life you deserve and we will have the best years, together.”

[andreablog2]

Rina was ahead of her time in 2018 w her songwriting and everything and idek what she did to warrant all the hate she gets. There’s very much a whites only attitude when it comes to who gets to identify as an alternative artist. Same reason twigs gets as much shit as she dose even though she’s easily one of the most dedicated to her craft/well researched/well rounded musicians today…..honestly I want act 3 to be alt or alt pop or whatever. So unfair charli is credited w giving pop/dance music a level artistic merit when in fact it was Donna Summer, Whitney, Janet and honestly Madonna who did that first. Like idek the earnestness which people consumed brat in the beginning of its digestion in pop culture really rubbed me the wrong way given how Beyoncés music, Nickis music, Mariah’s music were treated…which in every way are much more inventive, influential, capable of writing mega hits for decades upon decades…regardless of how you feel abt them those are honestly the women who should be given all this intellectual credit.

[venuscnjunctpluto]

My first astrology observation

Credit: @venuscnjunctpluto

(Pls excuse the book at the end y’all I’m just sick of straight men)

*Black men w virgo rising either have dreads that they let hang in front of their eyes or they want dreads that they let hang in front of their eyes😭

*actors with mars-pluto aspects or Scorpio mars can play convincing psychopaths and villians (dacre Montgomery, drew starkey, ethan cutkosky)

*Saweetie and Mariah the scientist are Unconfirmed Taurus risings idgaf

*I have Pisces and Neptune in my 11th and when I tell you pisces can be so manipulative. I’ve been friends w all types of Pisces placements. Esp when Aries in is in mix they know exactly how to act like children and therefore literally be seen as children (zero accountability). For example chrisean rock whose a Pisces w an Aries mars.

* the biggest players are Scorpio/libra placement men by FARRR. They’ll flirt with anybody and they���ll befriend people who they know for a fact are interested in them romantically. You’ll know that they like when you they never “leave” you in any way, when they try to help you anyway they can, and when they change themselves for you (as terrible as that is that’s the truth). Lemme say after a break-up or any situation they feel wronged their hoe phase is terrible. They don’t gaf at ALL and my friend even got caught up (he spent the whole summer flirting w her after his gf dumped him and then ignored her once we got back to campus) she still doesn’t want to believe he was playing her.

*Im sorry but any prominent sag + Scorpio placements scare tf out of me. I had a stalker with a sag rising Scorpio Venus and mars and my cousin had an obsessive fwb w a sag rising Scorpio moon. Ted Bundy had hella sag and Scorpio on his chart. They have the humor and impulsiveness of a Sagittarius mixed with the intensity and passion of a Scorpio. I think it’s hard for people to realize how insane they are because they’re too busy cracking jokes😫

* 8h stellium natives we see the REAL in people like they come around us and act a mf fool

*women w Lilith inspecting ascendant🤝 Venus-Lilith aspects

*Me w an Aries rising 🤝 men w mars ruled venuses (Aries and Scorpio)

*Can we talk about why a lot of gemini Venuses have race fetishes😭 they’ll literally seek out certain races usually a group they’re not apart of

*8th house synastry is very strange to me. From my experience staring is very real, manipulative, and a lot of push-pull dynamics no thank you😮‍💨

*One really weird thing is I notice men who date younger women always have a cap mars like wtf. They seem to really like the power dynamics involved.

*Ok so me and my friend whose a female both have Venus conjunct pluto at like 2 degrees. I met a guy born a day after me and so did she (so they had Venus Pluto as well) We were intrigued because I’ve had my share of strange relationships but i noticed how light his energy was (the guys whose birthday was near mine). He didn’t really give off the same energy. i truly think it represents a guy’s relationship with women not necessarily him. I have seen women obsess over them but the women always had Scorpio energy in their natal chart already. also have a Madonna whore complex real mf bad so watch out. The WOMEN around them have Plutonian energy already and that’s why 8/10 they’re involved w Scorpio women. I’ve seen the same thing with women w mars-pluto (my mom has this conjunction and my step-dad is a Scorpio). Venus-Pluto men are not magnetic but with the way women (usually Scorpio influenced) act around them makes them think they are and they can become addicted to this attention. Yes other men can be jealous of how women act around them but sometimes they see the Venus-pluto man’s thirsty ways. I’ve seen men w this placement cross their friends for attention from girls. I met this guy w Venus square pluto and he seemed funny at first but he was so sleazy and childish when it came to talking to women I didn’t even wanna be around him. They also have a “type” usually. I’ve seen two men with this placements date girls who look like they could be sisters it’s very weird. I also believe Venus-Pluto men usually end up w women who have money *coughs* city boys or come from better financial situations than them while Venus-pluto women usually have the money they had before a relationship (even if through family). Ex: Beyoncé, Nicola Peltz, Ryan Destiny. You wanna see some real magnetism (and transformative chaos) find a woman w Venus Pluto and a man w mars Pluto🫦

[engie-ivy]

When someone goes home to their small town for Christmas, it never bodes well for their career-focused, Christmas Spirit-lacking, big city boyfriend, but Sirius isn't going to give up that easily.

All I Want For Christmas Is YOU

All I Want For Christmas - Mariah Carey

Remus puts down his tea mug and looks up from his book as he hears the front door open.

His mum walks in, bundled up in her big coat, scarf and woollen hat, her face beaming and her cheeks rosy. Sirius follows behind her, looking decidedly less warm in his leather jacket, the tip of his nose red and his teeth clattering.

“Hullo love!” His mum greets Remus cheerfully, while taking off her hat and beginning to unwrap her scarf. “We just had so much fun at the Christmas tree farm, didn’t we, Sirius?”

Sirius bares his teeth, and it takes Remus a moment to realise it’s supposed to be a smile.

“You could actually dig out your tree yourself this year!” His mum continues. “Now of course we couldn’t resist, now could we, Sirius?”

“W-we sure c-couldn’t!” Sirius replies, attempting to sound excited, but not really succeeding due to the shivering in his voice.

“I’ll admit it was a bit chilly,” his mum says, which is an understatement considering Sirius’ half-frozen state. “But it was nothing a good cup of hot coco couldn’t fix, am I right, Sirius?”

“S-so true.”

His mum beams at Sirius, oblivious to his distress, then turns back to Remus. “Old man Prewett will deliver the tree later. We dug up a real beauty, Remus, you’ll see!”

“I’m sure I will,” Remus replies, eying Sirius, whose standing so stiff, probably due to the fact that he can barely move his frozen limbs.

“We just had such a lovely day!” His mum has finished taking off her coat, while Sirius is yet to move. “And Sirius is also going to help me prepare the roast for dinner later!”

“Is he now?” Remus says.

His mum happily pats Sirius’ cheek before skipping off to the kitchen.

“You’re a vegetarian,” Remus says to Sirius as soon as his mum is gone.

Sirius nods.

“Because you can’t take the sight of dead animals.”

Sirius nods again.

“And the only hot beverage you’re willing to drink is black coffee. You hate hot chocolate.”

“I sure do,” Sirius agrees.

“And last time I checked, you were allergic to pine trees. Which is why we never have a Christmas tree at home.”

Sirius sniffs and Remus notices his eyes are puffy. “I can confirm that I still am.”

Remus puts his book down and gets up from his chair. He walks over to Sirius and takes one of his hands in his, and starts rubbing the freezing cold hand trying to warm it up. “Love, what are you doing?”

“I’m embracing The Christmas Spirit!” Sirius says, attempting to sound excited.

Remus just gives him a look, and Sirius sighs. “Don’t you see, Remus? It’s me!”

“What’s you?”

“The designer clothes-wearing, career-focused city boy who doesn’t care much for Christmas.”

“So?”

“So?” Sirius repeats. “So they always get dumped before the final act!”

“Why would I dump you?” Remus asks. “And what ‘final act’?”

“It’s always the same,” Sirius says miserably. “The person,” he gestures at Remus. “goes home to their small town, where they rediscover their roots and The True Meaning of Christmas, and come to the conclusion that a work-obsessed city boy is the last thing they want. I have to embrace The Christmas Spirit if I want any chance at ever getting the guy!”

“You already have the guy!” Remus exclaims.

Sirius just smiles sadly. “They always do at first. But then you’ll meet the alluring stranger who took over your great-grandmother’s Christmas Cookie Bakery, whom you think you dislike at first, but also feel weirdly attracted to, or the handsome single dad who moved to town after his divorce with his perfect, adorable kid to help his father run the Christmas Tree Farm, or your high school crush who never left town because small town life is all he ever desired, and who you now find out always had a thing for you as well, and then I might get one final hug goodbye before I can kindly bugger off back to the city to live my sad, lonely, Christmas-less life.”

“Sweetheart,” Remus says. “Just how many Christmas movies have you watched?”

Sirius shrugs. “I wanted to be well-prepared for celebrating Christmas in a small town.”

“Okay,” Remus says, letting go of Sirius’ hand in favour of cupping his face between his hands. “Then let me make one thing very clear to you. I love that we have an excuse not to put up a Christmas tree every year, because honestly, it seems like a hell of a lot of work for just one day, I love it when you get all passionate about work, I love how ridiculously sexy you look in those designer clothes of yours, I love how smart, determined and ambitious you are, I love you. Okay? You. Just as the dramatic, slightly vain, overeager city boy you are.”

Sirius smiles. “I know. And I’m sorry. It’s just that before coming here, I never considered just from how different backgrounds we come, and I suddenly got really afraid of losing you. But that’s only because I love you. So much.”

“You’re such a sweetheart,” Remus says, and then he chuckles. “And don’t worry, you’re not getting rid of me that easy.”

“Hi, sorry to interrupt, but the door was open.”

Remus and Sirius both turn towards the door, where a tall, handsome man with reddish hair and a freckled face is standing, wearing working clothes and muddy boots.

“I’m here to deliver a Christmas tree for Hope Lupin, and I- Remus?”

“Fabian!”

Fabian laughs. “Oh my god, it really is you! I didn’t know you were in town! I haven’t seen you since... when has it been?”

“It must’ve been at our high school prom!”

“Right!” Fabian smiles. “Just before you left to follow your big city-dreams.”

Remus chuckles. “So did you! I thought you were in New York?”

“Nah,” Fabian shrugs. “Big city life really wasn’t for me. And I wanted to be closer to my family as well. I’m now helping da out at the Christmas Tree Farm, and I get to spend a lot of time with my nephews as well.”

Two red-headed heads peak out from behind Fabian’s leg. Both small boys stare at Remus wide-eyed, one of them clutching a stuffed dragon to his chest, the other with his thumb in his mouth. Fabian ruffles their hair. “This are Charlie and Bill, helping their uncle Fabian out for the day.”

“They’re adorable! Gideon’s?”

“Molly’s,” Fabian says. “She has a baby as well, and twins on the way! It’s amazing to be here to watch them grow up.”

Remus smiles softly. “So I reckon you never regretted your decision?”

“Not for a moment,” Fabian replies, looking down at Charlie and Bill. “Besides, I couldn’t let Gid become the favourite uncle, now could I?”

Remus laughs, shaking his head. “You haven’t changed at all!”

Fabian studies Remus for a moment. “You have. But in a good way. You look... great.”

There’s a moment of silence. Then Fabian looks away and scrapes his throat. “How long are you in town for?”

“Just for the Holidays, I’m afraid,” Remus replies.

“Well, we should definitely meet for a coffee and catch up!” Fabian suggests.

Sirius looks from Fabian to Remus and back to Fabian.

“No,” he says pointedly.

He walks up to Fabian, grabs his arm and starts walking him back to the front door. “No, absolutely not, not happening, no.”

Fabian looks stunned when Sirius deposits him on the front porch, where Charlie and Bill quickly join him, each grabbing a leg.

“I’m sorry, Fabian!” Remus calls from over Sirius’ shoulder, though unable to contain his laughter. “We’ll talk later and I’ll explain!” He manages to say right before Sirius closes the door in Fabian’s face.

“But first,” Remus says once the door is closed, pulling Sirius towards him by the lapels of his jacket. “I need to get it through to my idiotic boyfriend’s thick head that in my Christmas movie, he’s not a side-character.”

[autisticlancemcclain]

fic rec friday 54

hello and welcome to fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

all i want for christmas by tusslee

“Listen,” Lance squeezes Keith’s fingers in his hands, “I’m as bad at this as you probably are and this is going to be really cheesy, but that’s the way I was raised and I know I act like an idiot around pretty girls, but I’m an even bigger idiot around you. Go ahead and try to guess why that is. No, actually don't do that."

this one is gonna be an xmas special!! even though im writing this before halloween lol. anyways. this was so cute!! lance being all stressed about what he should get keith bc he's all in love w him any everything. so real.

2. You're Here (Where You Should Be) by @blue-wanderer

"And if you’re worried about the cameras just take care of them.” “Take care—! Take care of them? With what, Keith?” “I don’t know?” Keith asks, busily testing his foothold in the gate and generally ignoring the rising storm cloud of ire behind him. “With a gun?” “A gun? This isn’t some sort of black ops storming an enemy base thing! This is a Christmas tree thing!” “I don’t see a difference? You’re the sharpshooter. Shoot out the cameras.” “Let me just pull a gun out of my ass, Keith!” “OK, problem solved,” Keith agrees, taking another step up the gate. “Nothing is solved you dumb country space redneck!”

Or Keith and Lance may be disasters at decorating, but Christmas still manages to work its magic on them.

i bookmarked this like a year ago and let me tell you all i needed to hear was dumb country space redneck and i was hooked 😭😭 and it lived up to the name fr. hate the canon ending? want lance to not be a farmer while still acknowledging his struggles with homesickness? want some whipped keith and meddlesome kosmo? want some cheesy xmas feels? click ahead!

3. make my wish come true by angelbolt

“A world where one has to fight for custody of one’s boyfriend is a godless one,” Lance muttered, slumping so he was leaning against Hunk. Shiro exchanged some final words with Kolivan before the screen blipped out. Ah yes, the ideal Christmas Eve: long boring talks and war meetings. Wonderful. ❆❅❆ keith comes home for christmas.

fun game idea: take a shot every time you see a klance xmas fic with a mariah carey lyric. lol. ANYWAYS yall know me and established relationship + early season dynamics!! i am obsessed!! and this fic delivers!! grumpy lance pov who just wants the rest of the world to fuck off for a couple days so he can have his bf around. he's such a voice of the people

4. i'll be home for christmas by @thespacenico

A severe bout of winter weather threatens to stop Shiro from making it home for his first Christmas with Keith. Shiro is ready to do whatever it takes to keep his promise.

okay this one is from darcy's i've got you brother, which i am obsessed with and have cried over several times, and which just recently updated! this fic is so cute and a adashi with young keith always fucking gets to me, man. they're just so. shiro being so desperately determined to keep his promise to young keith who has had so many promises broken that he doesnt even expect shiro to try. but is happy that he does. sobbing.

5. the greatest gift of all by dumpsterdiva

Keith’s mouth hung open for a few seconds before he stammered, “D-do you really mean that?” Lance looked a bit sheepish as he said, “I… It’s crazy, right? I mean, it’s way too soon. You know I was kidding.” Keith straightened up. “Well, I’m not. Marry me.” “What?!” “You heard me, you coward. Marry me.” “That’s the worst proposal ever!” “Worse than you threatening me with marriage so I would stop talking about how amazing you are?”

YOU GUYS KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT PROPOSAL FICS. i feel ksjbskdbqjdbqwlwd about them. okay. and throw in a christmas setting??? and banter?? and a MODERN AU?? i am doing my best, people. this fic had me shoving a pillow into my face and screaming.

that’s it for today!! happy holidays! merry christmas!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

[star-girl69]

OKAY LIVE UPDATES!! (ALLEGEDLY!!! xoxo pls dont sue me im js a girl)

identity theft??:

q made a fake account pretending to be a girl named saylor [her real acc is saylor.steward05 on tiktok] putting her name, face, college, etc. (that's how saylor was dragged into this)

q dragged paige into the discussion by saying that fake acct of saylor was texting paige, and that paige 'replied' saying everything abt q was fake

-> they think this is fake, since paige is on her side-quest hustle rn and likely wouldn't check her message requests from random people

-> they also think that q is attempting to use paige's name to garner support for herself

reaching out to others:

they haven't tried to reach out to anyone else on the team cause they're trying not to involve anyone else

they've attempted to reach out to maryland sheriff's dept (since q is from maryland), and they said they couldn't do anything- they then reached out to uconn's campus police and attempted to file a complaint, nothing has come of it yet

they've attempted to reach out to coaches, nothing has come of it yet

mariah dmed info abt what's happening to paige, she hasn't replied but they don't know if she's seen it cause she's on vacay and allat

-> they're not mad abt it tho cause they know she's busy and that it's also not her responsibility to handle q's nonsense

azzi's brother joined the live (azzi is suspected to b part of the secret q was leaking), she offered to let him join but said absolutely no pressure if he don't want to

-> he didn't join

q + her fam (potentially) silencing others?

the original post exposing q (on mariah's page) got taken down, they say that q was the one who got it taken down

many of the people who are co-hosting on Mariah's live are coming out to say that they got banned from going live for a while (they think q is mass reporting people to stop stuff from spreading)

q's cousin is in the live

-> mariah's cohosts + ppl in the chat are getting reported/banned off the live, they think q's cousin is potentially helping her with that?

they're wondering if q's family is dealing with things privately, but "the way her family is going about things publicly shows that they definitely aren't doing anything about it)

-> q's sister allegedly posted something Mariah abt catching a fade (I couldn't hear it super well)

other stuff q did:

she DID say something (it wasn't specified what) abt someone's dead ex-gf

q allegedly also talked shit abt her teammates to mariah when they were still talking

a girl + her friend had added q on roblox (she posted her acct. a while ago to js have fun) and they played tgt, then she made an edit and q reposted/liked/faved it, but when she went on q's live ppl were being wild in the comments so she said "y'all r doing tm" and she was blocked cause q thought she was saying that to her

-> claimed that she does have receipts (i didn't see them but it could b true)

other notes:

they're not gonna discuss the 'secret' that q dropped, cause it's obvs not their secret to tell

they're discussing if kk harvey knows about what's happening w q or not, they don't think she knows? (she hasn't made any statements if she does)

-> someone asked her abt it on lacey's live last night, but the comment wasn't acknowledged/noticed

-> talking ab how kk was VISIBLY uncomfortable during their live tgt, talking ab how q was being like 'ditzy' and saying dumbahh stuff like "oh is hockey played in a gym" n other stuff like that (imo that's not the worst??? cause ngl she might js b nervous around kk)

there's a discord server abt surviving q-diddy!! (im not joining cause im not tryna actively put myself into the situation, q aint gon get me xoxo <3)

mariah was not a minor when things went down, but a lot of people who have been reaching out to her/coming out with their own stories were minors (and q knew it)

mariah is ending the live for now, since she doesn't want to risk getting banned/getting her live privilege taken away (might move the live to ig to avoid the ban) + she's starting to cry and she doesn't want to do that on live obvs

-> she'll be back on tiktok live today @ 9pm central time (it'll b pretty late for my timezone and a girls got practice in the morning so

-> she also wants to take some time to find more receipts + recollect cause this is obvs a lot for some1 to go thru

okay long story short q has done this over and over again to a ton of other people, and has also been doing some other wack stuff, a handful of her family members have been siding w her (which obvs isnt okay) -- lets not attack all of her family until stuff is confirmed abt them tho cause they're not responsible for q's actions <3

OKAY MWAH IM SORRY THIS IS A WHOLE THESIS- HAVE A NICE NIGHT XOXO PLS DONT SUE ME Q <3

i’m gonna put this in the tags just in case anyone else wants to know the q tea lol!!!!

OH MY GOD YOURE DOINT GODS WORK let me break this down.

identity theft- oh my god making fake accounts is such a q thing to do. i definitely agree w using paige’s name to garner support, that’s definitely a smart choice ig?? lol too bad it’s fake

reaching out- ok GOOD JOB FOR TRYING TO CONTACT PEOPLE!!! i definitely think the best place to go is with the coaches rn. that is where she’s going to get the most consequences in my opinion, looking forward to updates from campus police and coaches tho

silencing people- yeah i would bet a lot of money that q is the one who got mariah’s video taken down and is mass reporting, idk the things with her family i think have to be taken slowly bc no one really knows what is happening privately. like i just can’t imagine what her family is going through rn and trying to deal w what q has done must be absolutely horrible. i hope they all get some peace after all of this- but i also hope they’re doing the right thing. if q’s cousin really is helping her ban people then that’s a big no-no, but i feel like also why would her cousin join purposely on their acc instead of some secret spam or smth??? idk that’s just me, but who knows

other stuff- i heard about the ex gf thing i’m pretty sure from the original person, i cannot remember where i saw the video but i’m pretty sure it was from someone on tumblr who has reposted it. i don’t remember what was said either tho, omg the roblox thing is crazy… blocking someone that fast who you had a good relationship w previously is like kinda mentally ill as shit lmao???

other notes- i’m so glad they’re not discussing the secret.

kk harvey- ok about them acknowledging it- this unfortunately happened on the live like the second BEFORE i started screen recording- i think someone asked if laila and kk knew about the q drama and i THINK laila responded with “there’s no q drama” or something along those lines- I COULD BE COMPLETELY WRONG SO DONT TAKE THIS AS FACT!!!! i genuinely don’t remember that well. honestly the kk and q lives (the clips of it i’ve seen) didn’t seem very predatory? just very awkward and weird. kk was obviously uncomfortable i totally agree and i think q probably could have noticed that and at the very least toned it down, q was being very “ditzy” lol but i honestly just think that was either her trying to flirt or as you said drama anon just her being nervous

queen definitely don’t join if you’re not comfortable!!!! we appreciate you watching this live and keeping us updated so much, i’m sure most of the stuff in the discord is just regurgitated from the lives but if something major does come out i’m sure we’ll all hear about it. also don’t worry about getting the live for tonight!!! i seriously appreciate you so much for this, you are truly one of god’s strongest soldiers LOL 🙏🙏

minors- yeah the fact that this now involves minors has definitely like brought this up to a level TEN… some type of law enforcement definitely needs to be involved at this point.

i think the best thing mariah can do in this situation is remain calm and not spark the flames anymore, don’t give q reasons to mass report people, her and the other victims need to collect all of their evidence and receipts and get it to someone who will know what to do- and if that ends up being the police then that’s what it ends up being.

i definitely agree w you w the stuff about her family, at the end of the day WE DONT KNOW. we don’t know anything, we don’t know what’s true and what’s fake and unless there’s concrete evidence i think everyone following along w the situation needs to take everything with a grain of salt, verify their sources, and listen to multiple perspectives of what’s going on and think CRITICALLY about all of this for just a second.

q is the only person who is responsible for her actions, and she needs to be held accountable for them.

thank you SO MUCH for this thesis i literally love you drama anon. i hope you have an amazing night and i hope q diddy doesn’t get you ❤️❤️❤️ (if anyone sues you or attacks you just send them over here bc i will FIGHT)

[libras-interactives]

If your ocs were in the modern era, what would there favorite musicians be?

So im terrible at naming musicians and such, so ill go for genre and general taste!

Marius: "whatever's on the radio", and old French music his parents would listen to. He probably likes any music that gets him pumped and has a hard beat. Willing to listen to any genre and is terrible at describing what he likes! Doesn't have a spotify or itunes, just types the song into youtube and blasts that from his cracked phone. Loves a handful of French radio stations he streams on his phone; the quality is fucked and it drains his battery but he doesnt care.

Jack: Exclusively oldies bluegrass and gospel bc thats all his parents would play. Modern pop country and christian rock confounds him. He could swear his pa said something about drums being the devil's instrument. Metal is scary until he reads the lyrics and has a small mental shutdown. Just like him fr fr... thinks Marius' French stations are incomprehensible but he says nothing bc he doesnt have a better suggestion.

Lottie: A huuuge pop girlie, as well as jazz and 90s r&b. Yes jazz is a very broad genre, but she'd like so much of it, especially more unique or weird sounds. Doesnt "get" hyperpop or tiktok music and worries she's getting old bc of that. LOVES musicals and would likely be a professional in the modern times, and if not that, she'd be in local theaters.

Eveline: Still uses cassettes and CDs, and theyre all classical, opera recordings and vocalists, mostly European. Enjoys some musicals. She thinks she's kinda up to date on modern pop music, but when you ask her what's the last pop album she listened to, she'll say Celine Dion's Falling Into You. She'd start sobbing if she got to see Natalie Dessay.

Máire: Huge punk and rock girlie, especially the Irish scene. Probably exclusively listens to punk tbh. She'd frequent the clubs and smoke too much in the corner while appearing disinterested but is actually vibing so hard w the music. Really loves making mixtapes and recordings, never got into vinyls or cds. Wants spotify to burn and die.

Malwina: LOOOVES pop and is a massive Britney Spears, Selena, Mariah Carey and Janet Jackson fan. 90s-2000s pop is her favorite by far and those are the only CDs she owns. Probs has a beatup little red Ipod she's had since middle school; it was a hand me down from her oldest cousin and she treasures it even if it's "old". Queen of pirating and burning music but by god she paid for her Mariah Carey and Britney Spears cds. She wanted the pretty inserts and lyric booklets.

Slyvester: Loves a lot of swing and oldies from his parent's day, and Italian vocalists his wife adores. They played Andrea Bocelli almost exclusively at the wedding. Finds the music his sons listen to bizarre but doesn't mind the rock and alt rock too much.

[bookoftheironfist]

Jennie: "W...what happened to me?" Mariah: "You went a little off the rails. That's all. We got you back, girl." Jennie: "I felt so much...hate. I wanted to destroy everything." Mariah: "Ain't no more hate here--just love. Don't make me bust out into my favorite jam from the Lion King." Power Man and Iron Fist vol. 3 #4 by David Walker, Sanford Greene, Lee Loughridge, and Clayton Cowles

One of the great joys of this series, and something that writer David Walker discussed quite a bit in interviews at the time it was being published, is the way that large numbers of under-used and forgotten characters (including some very goofy D-level villains from the 70s) were brought back into the spotlight and given a bit more depth, personality, and humanity. One character in particular is Mariah "Black Mariah" Dillard, who first appeared in Luke Cage: Hero For Hire #5 and made a mere handful of appearances in that series and in Power Man and Iron Fist volume 1 before largely disappearing from the Marvel Universe. Here, 40 years later, she reappears as a new friend to Heroes for Hire's former office manager Jennie Royce, who in this series is finally released from prison following the events of Power Man and Iron Fist volume 2.

When this new dynamic duo's quest for power goes awry and Jennie gets corrupted by a magical artifact, it's Mariah's love for her that saves the day. This scene encapsulates something this series does so well: melding heart and humor in a celebration of shared humanity and connection. Jennie and Mariah's friendship, while established solely for this series, ends up feeling very special, especially when placed alongside the love between Luke and Danny that anchors the comic.

[flufallo]

What I think of JD ships

Jackson x exer- if you ship this you might want to get your brain checked...

Jackson x pamela- this ship is actually so underrated

David x exer- who doesn't like this ship?

David x ron- no. There just friends

Pamela x brenda- again, just friends.

Brenda x ken- I think this ship is quite cute, and it's canon (kinda?)

Brenda x jolie- I can see why this might be a good ship, but imo they don't rlly speak much so idk I'm a brenlie neutralist (if that's what it's called lmao)

Brenda x nobody- yessss, Brenda should stay a single Pringle and she would rock every second of it

Ron x timothy- words cannot describe how much I love romothy. even though I know Ron is canonly asexual, I still love it and have hope for it existing 🙏

Jackson x ken- ... Now I think about it, it does make sense... I mean, ken does flirt with Jackson left right and centre, but, then again, he does that for everyone

Ricky x marty- for some bizarre reason I like this ship. It's probably BC it's pretty funny and ironic lmao

W!ll!am X linda- Linda, sweetie. Dump his ass. Go find someone who is nice. Not the fugly ginger rat

W!ll!am x electric chair- omg there a perfect match 🥹. Whos coming to the wedding? (it's also the funeral as well)

Christine X harry- idk, its ok- ISH, but it would be quite weird to be with the mother/ father of your son's boyfriend...

Mariah x norman- these 2 have FR got something going on

Kevin x rubbish chute from willy Wonka's factory- omg yessss they have such good chemistry

W!ll!am x electric chair x rubbish chute from ww's factory- the perfect threesome amiright?

[silentmoths]

The most amicable guest at the party.

here it is folks, the promised Vampire Zhongli smutfic for halloween w only 45 minutes left until mariah carey herself defrosts.

it do b kinda rushed feeling, sorry ;;

Vampire Zhongli x Afab reader

NSFW, Modern setting, Vampire AU, Hypnotism, biting/blood drinking, zhongli's stupid long tongue, some aphrodesiac, all of it is consensual dw. 3K Words, not proofread.

It wasn’t often you let yourself be dragged to one of these silly halloween parties by your friends.

They knew you hated things being sprung on you, you were a ‘three to five business days notice’ type of person, not a ‘three to five minutes’ to prepare. 

Yet here you were, dinky set of cat ears clipped into your hair, with some fruity, alcoholic beverage in your hand, your friends long since splitting away from you to mingle with the other people here that you didn’t know.

Your silly little cat costume was certainly on the more…modest end of things here, considering the little clip-on ears and tailed-belt had been thrown at you in the car on the way here, but not like you were complaining. You’d seen a couple other ‘cats’ when you’d talked in that were far more…ahem, exposed than you would ever be comfortable with. 

Heck, since your friends abandonment, the only companionship you’d managed to find and enjoy until this point was the party-hosts actual cat, a fluffy, grumpy looking creature that seemed to hate this experience just as much as you did.

That is until you spot a pair of enchanting, amber eyes from across the room.

They belonged to a man. He was tall, with dark hair and sharp, stupidly handsome features. It doesn't take long for him to confirm you are in fact, looking his way, and he silently moves through the crowd and towards you. Somehow, and you’re not quite sure how, but he manages to pull of the vampire costume with grace, even with the stupid, high collar and the tiny little fangs poking from beneath his lips as he smiles softly at you.

“Ah, I see you’ve found the most amicable guest at this party.” He comments teasingly, motioning his glass of wine towards your feline friend.

“So it would seem.” You agree, giving the cat another scratch upon the head. “I do say he’s certainly pulling off my costume better than I am…perhaps I should go home and change.” 

The new stranger chuckles, regarding your slapdash costume “I take it this party was thrust upon you with little warning?” 

“Quite literally as I had finished my shift at work, yes.” You sigh, taking another sip of the drink your friend had thrust into your hand before vanishing. “If I’m being honest, I’d much rather be at home watching some shitty vampire movie- oh! No offence.”

The stranger laughs, warm and hearty and wow, those are some sturdy fangs, he’s even able to speak without the telltale lisp that come with the shitty plastic ones.

“Oh none taken, to be honest I was thinking about leaving myself as well…if you would like, I can always give you a ride home?” 

You have never said yes to jumping into a strangers car so quickly in your life. 

—

Zhongli was his name, and after some amicable talking and a quick trip through the drive through for a much needed coffee (which he paid for and refused to accept your cash even though he purchased nothing for himself, chivalrous bastard), plans take a decidedly flirtatious turn. 

“You know.” He muses as his fingers thrum against the steering wheel “My apartment is closer…you said you were a fan of vampire movies, yes? I happen to be a bit of a vampire aficionado if the costume didn’t give it away…would you like to join me for a movie instead?”

Internally? You’re screaming, you’re crying, you’re throwing up. This is the single most handsome specimen you have ever encountered on the planet and he’s just asked if you’d like to netflix and chill.

“O-oh Only if it’s not too much trouble Zhongli, I wouldn’t want to impose…” 

His gaze flicks to you a moment, soft and warm like honey and you want to faint; how the hell had you gotten into this situation?

“I would not have offered it if I hadn’t wanted you to say yes, darling.” His words are all but a low purr and you need to tamp back the urge to squeeze your thighs together like the hopeless, horny idiot you were. “Plus, my apartment is a ways off the ground floor, so It’s not like we’ll be disturbed by trick-or-treaters.”

Oh, potential sex without the fear of being interrupted? Sign you up.

–

When he said his apartment was off the ground floor, you had not expected the penthouse, but then again, the fancy black car should have also been a dead giveaway that he was loaded if his face didn’t scream ‘i'm rich’ already.  

Even now, he opens the car door for you, and even invites you personally into his home, a lavish apartment with all sorts of interesting, historical knick knacks and pretty shiny rocks, you had asked on the way here what he did for a living and he was apparently a geologist, which judging by the immaculately labelled gemstones…yeah, that checked out.

You sigh with relief, finally reaching up to pull those stupid ears from your hair and unclasp the belt, shoving both away into your bag, turning to watch as Zhongli shrugs off the silly vampire coat, revealing an immaculate vest and trouser combo beneath that made your mouth water just a little too much.

“You’re not gonna spit out the fangs?” you ask as he approaches; his smile only widening as something more sinister flickers across his gaze.

“Oh, my darling, these are very much real.”

In the blink of an eye, Zhongli’s handsome face suddenly radiates something else, something predatory and something you cannot escape from as he reaches out for you, one hand curling around your waist to pull you close, and the other to wrench your head to the side.

“You have no idea how starving I am.” is all he whispers before his fangs sink sharp and quick into your throat. 

You expect to cry out in pain, to scream and to sob, at the very least you expect to struggle. 

It seems neither you, nor your attacker, are expecting you to moan, and neither of you are expecting your body's sudden jolt as you cum, untouched, right there in the middle of the living room. 

Apparently it’s surprising enough to have your assailant pull back, your blood still dripping from his fangs as he blinks down at you. You, who is caught somewhere between horribly ashamed, and horribly upset that he’d stopped.

“Did you just…?”

“I did nothing.” you huff, looking away from him.

“You did, you did just-”

“If anyone did anything, it’s you!” you hiss “You’re the one who bit my neck like some crazy fucking vampire!”

Zhongli is silent for a moment, eyeing you with confusion, you don’t even have the reaction time to stop him when his hand quickly delves beneath the waistline of your pants and underwear, two fingers smearing through the slick mess you’d already made of yourself.

“So, you’re telling me, you did not just orgasm from me attempting to feed off you?” He teases, warm tongue gently lapping across the bite mark he’d left on your throat, and humming when your thighs clench around his hand.

“A-and you’re telling me you’re actually a v-vampire?”

“Are you always going to answer my questions with more questions?”

“That depends on if you’re going to answer me or not…” you were doing your best to keep up a brave face, you really were, but how long had it been since someone had touched you like this? Fuck you can’t even remember. 

Zhongli quirks an eyebrow at you, golden eyes dark and swimming with curiosity and lust in equal measure.

“And…if I said I was, in fact, a vampire?”

“I would ask you a lot more questions…”

He hums, leaning in close once more, fangs grazing against delicate skin.

“And the question at the top of that list is…?”

“Do I…still have to invite you in if it’s my body?” 

Oh, well that certainly got a reaction, what a delightful little shudder that pulls, something you can only savour for a moment before his grip on you tightens. 

“You.” he breathes, ragged already against the shell of your ear “You little minx…I’ll admit, you’ve very much caught my interest… it’s been a good century since I last bedded anyone, let alone a mortal… you have one last chance…if you say no, I’ll have my meal and leave you on your way come the morning…”

Chivalrous, even with that rather impressive-feeling hardon pressing against your hip.

Perhaps you should feel frightened, perhaps you should really reconsider your life choices if you’re very much considering fucking a real vampire…

Oh well, that was going to be a problem for future you, present you was far too horny to care that tonight might be your last night alive. 

—

The feeling of your blood slowly being pulled from your body is one you’re not sure you’d ever get used to, but there's something so…delightful about the feeling.

Zhongli tells you it’s rather atypical to enjoy it, but he’s not exactly upset by this development either.

His fangs slowly retract from your flesh as he’s finally had his fill pulls with it a small gasp, letting your head slump back against soft sheets as he sits back to simply admire.

“My, what a wonderful development…hm…I do hope you’ll enjoy tonight just as much as I will, little kitten.” His voice seeps into your mind, words weaving through your very soul and making you keen for more. 

Seems more is exactly what Zhongli is happy to give, once he’s cleaned his mouth of your blood, you can see the way his eyes spark with rejuvenation right before his mouth descends upon yours, lips pressing together with fever. It’s easy to ignore the taste of iron on his tongue when you’re more preoccupied discovering just how long said tongue was. Prehensile and slippery, dominating and mapping out every inch of your mouth before he pushes even more, to the back of your mouth and beyond, pushing towards your throat.

Only then do you struggle, afraid you may gag, but a soothing hand pressing against your forehead eases your movements, before his voice invades your mind.

‘Shhh, hush darling, bear with it a moment longer, this is so I do not hurt you later.’ 

His lips don't move, you supposed if the blood drinking hadn’t been proof enough of his status, the fact he could speak telepathically was. He croons against your mouth as you whimper, trying your best to keep still, you’d trusted him this far somehow, just a little more wouldn’t hurt.

‘Good, very good darling.’ his words echo through your mind again as you feel…something, some kind of liquid? Thick and viscous, slide down your throat, warming your body on it’s way down before Zhongli finally pulls away, his tongue retracting from your mouth with a slick click of a noise. “Give that a few minutes and you’ll feel amazing.”

“W-what was…that?” you hadn’t realised that you’d been holding your breath through that entire process until you’d finally been given access to air once more, leaving you a gasping, panting mess as you watch Zhongli slowly, but carefully begin to undress you. First your shoes, then socks, leaving one in it’s respective shoe, before he moves on to his own, seemingly taking his sweet time to let…whatever he’d just done, do it’s work.

“An aphrodisiac.” He enlightens “Not that you need it for arousal…but it will help your body be even more…perceptive.” 

“I…don't think I need help with that either…” You point out, but he simply shoots you a look that does nothing but scream ‘just you wait’ as he shrugs his vest from his shoulders. You’re not sure if he’s intending to make this a show for you, but you appreciate it either way. He’s methodical, one piece from you, one from him, each folded neatly and left on the ottoman at the end of his bed until you’re both left in nothing but your underwear.

(Not like your panties weren’t already soaked through, leaving nothing to the imagination, how embarrassing.)

Finally he puts his hands back on you, smooth and warm, certainly not what you expect from centuries old. 

“Look at me.” He murmurs, sliding between your legs and leaning forward, hands spreading up your torso. His gaze is warm, like dripping gold, predatory and lustful, and as you gaze up at him, you swear you can see the colour in his eyes shift, slow and mesmerising, to the point you can’t tear your gaze away, your mind slowly clouding, like a haze that left nothing but Zhongli and Zhongli alone.

“That’s it, nothing else matters right now, just you and me, hm? Like I said, perceptive.” 

“What…what freaky vampire thing did you just do to me…?” your words feel slow and slurred, just like the rest of the world as Zhongli smiles down at you.

“A little bit of hypnotism, nothing more. You still retain yourself, but everything feels just that little bit more…vivid.” At first, you don’t know what he means, but he’s quick to elaborate, brushing his thumb across a single, pert nipple and the resounding shock of pleasure that it brings leaves you reeling as he chuckles above you “see?”

God, you were in for a long night.

—

It had been entirely too long since your last foray into bed with someone, you weren’t exactly a novice with this but damn.

Damn did Zhongli blow all your previous partners out of the water. 

He left nowhere untouched, no patch of skin escaped his hands or his lips; soft in their touch, but intent clear. He drinks in your pathetic noises as his previous ministrations leave you strung out, hot and desperate for him; made worse by his loving croons and coo’s of praise. 

You don’t realise just how long his tongue is until it works its way deep inside your aching sex; his hands gripping your hips firmly, keeping you stuck in place despite your desperate cries and attempts to shift, craving more of his tongue, more of his touch, more of him.

“L-li..” You manage to choke out one of the few words your brain can even muster, and are rewarded with a hum, which does nothing but send glorious vibrations up his tongue and right against your most sensitive spots. 

You can feel his fangs grazing against your pussy, reminding you of the danger, of the situation you’ve found yourself in, yet that added note of danger, of predator and prey? The thought still has your mouth watering, especially because as of yet, he’s yet to test his fangs anywhere too sensitive. 

Even with his mouth occupied, his stupid telepathy meant no escape from his words, praise marred with filth, promises of all that he wanted, and what would be happening to you that night.

He doesn’t remove his face from between your legs until he himself is satisfied. Greedy in his pleasure, and the lower half of his face glistening with slick, mesmerised once again as he slowly licks his lips with a pleased, predatory hum.

You had absolutely been prepared for the whole ‘invite him in’ spiel when he finally frees his cock from the straining confines of his boxers, but he doesn't even give you the chance. Grabbing one of your legs and throwing it over his shoulder before he rolls his hips forward and all but spears you in half in one hot, wet slide that has you screaming for him.

He’s not gentle, he’s spent too long being gentle with you and honestly? You’re tired of gentle. Both his clawed hands grip your thigh tightly, pulling your body down and into his deep, brutal thrusts; moulding your insides to the shape of his cock so wonderfully, the stinging burn of the sudden penetration lasting only a moment before it’s replaced by pure, euphoric pleasure. 

It’s here, when you’re both caught in the throes of pleasure, that you see him truly come undone. Talons flexing into your skin, eyes glowing bright gold and fangs glinting dangerously, this man truly was a creature to be feared and admired.

With the apparent stamina to match, after over an hour of pushing you over the edge so many times and neglecting himself, you’re really not surprised when he climaxes first, filling your belly with liquid heat that spread down your limbs and numbed your brain even more than it already was.

He only needs a moment to catch his breath, head slumped against your knee, before you catch the mischievous glint in his eyes right before he shifts, manhandling your body like it weighed nothing, barely even pulling his still-hard cock from you as he all but holds you up against the wall, unable to touch the floor.

He takes this in stride though, ramming his dick all the way back into you and swallowing your squealing moan with his hot mouth pressing over yours as he continues to rut against and bully your insides.

You lose count of how many different positions he takes you in that night, how many more orgasms he managed to pull, but when you finally regain consciousness the next…day? A quick check of the clock on his bedside confirmed, yes, definitely the next day, almost nearing noon in fact; The room is still dark.

Thick, heavy blockout blinds cover every window, and the lump of sleeping vampire beside you shifts, reaching out with one, groggy hand, groping at your place in the sheets until he finds you and pulls you right back in, snuggling right into your chest like a pampered cat.

“Don’t go…’ll drop you off tonight…bu’ stay f’now…” He mumbles into your boobs, and you can’t help but giggle quietly, smoothing your hands over his ragged hair. “Or…” he supplements “y’could stay f’rever…I’d like that too…” 

Forever, eh? Now that’s a tempting offer…

“I’ll have to think about that one…I kinda like garlic pizza though…”

Taglist: @stygianoir @meimeimeirin @ainescribe @rjssierjrie If you would like to be added to the taglist, just shoot me an ask!~

[andreablog2]

Lana del rey actually did so much for the concept of female auteurs in music in general and that is in a way less credit to her bc she doesn’t even identify w feminism and more credit to this allure she’s cultivated and how that makes people think she’s deeper than she is. Like Janet, Madonna, Mariah, Beyoncé etc….all kind of have more thoughtout well written albums and have more specific visions imo. I don’t think Lana is that but I also think she had a very unique artistic process nobody can seem to replicate. She’s very similar to Joan Didion in almost all the ways I described. I think she’s less cursed though, like I hope nothing tragic happens to her the way Joan had such a hard life following this blossoming beautiful career.

[princelabracebu]

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

“Zayne and Strawberry sitting on the table while they eating. Then, they talking about Whistle Register. Zayne was shocked that, Strawberry hit Whistle Register B6 tone.”

Zayne: “W-Wait…”

Zayne was now shocked. Was the tone really… THAT high? So high that it can actually cause damage to someone?

Strawberry: And I learn how to do it.

Zayne: “You… You learned how to do it…? You learned how to whistle like that? Did she personally teach you…? Or…? Did you learn it by observation? Because that is… wow… Such a high tone… And not just that. It’s also deadly if you’re in the vicinity of it too.”

Strawberry: I do whistle register when I was young.

Zayne: “You could already whistle-register when you were even younger…? I… I see. So you have also been practicing this skill of whistle-registering since a young age as well, just like Pamela… I have to admit. The more I learn about this side of you, the more intrigued I am by it. I never expected you to be able to whistle at that level of decibel before… I am impressed, truly."

Strawberry: I can whistle your name.

Zayne: “You… You can…?! You can whistle using that high tone, that high decibel whistle-register… and you can actually whistle my name? But how…?”

Strawberry: Ok, ZAAAAAAAAAAAYNE!!! (B6!!!!)

Zayne: “OH MY GOSH! You did just said my name! Through whistling! This is amazing! I knew you could whistle-register! But I didn’t expect you to be able to whistle-register my name! Just hearing that pitch made me feel dizzy for a second…!”

Strawberry: *Giggle* Before I do whistle register… I used head voice to whistle notes. Breathing and think.

Zayne: “You used your head voice and breathing to whistle register… before actually using the whistle register…? So you used your head voice and breathing to think up the right note to the whistle register… and that was how you actually whistle registered my name…? Is that right…?”

Strawberry: Yeah. ☺️ Zayne: “So your head voice was what helped you come up with your whistle register… It also helped you think of the right note. So that way you can successfully pitch your whistle register to my name. Wow… You really have been practicing this whistle register for a long time, haven't you?”

Strawberry: I sing here in the future.

Zayne: “So you sing here in the future… I see. So this is like a past-time hobby of yours to whistle register and sing? Does that mean you actually have a good singing voice then?”

Strawberry: Yeah. I am not ashamed to sing. ☺️

Zayne: “What? You’re not ashamed to sing at all? You’re okay with singing in front of others…? Because a lot of people… they get really shy and nervous when they get asked to sing. But you’re saying that… you can sing without a problem in front of others…? With no embarrassment or any sort of shyness whatsoever…?”

Strawberry: When I whistle register my college days in The stage, people start to speechless And shocked. 😳 they even give me a loud clap. 👏

Zayne: “*They gave you a loud clap for whistle registering…? So they were all amazed and shocked by your whistle registering? Damn… That’s… impressive. They were so used to hearing the normal whistle register.But yours was at such a high decibel that it shocked them, right?”

Strawberry: My college days… I sing ‘Someday’ by Mariah Carey

Zayne: “You sang Someday by Mariah Carey?! Wow… She is a singer with a high vocal range. I wonder if the people who were there got to hear you hit the high notes…?”

Strawberry: I follow the whistle register B6.

Zayne: “Damn… You were able to hit the same high note as the whistle register? Were you able to hold it? How long could you sustain that high B6? And more importantly, can you still hit that high B6 now?”

Strawberry: You want to hear again? Hmm? ☺️

Zayne: “You can still hit that high B6…!? And you’re asking me if I want to hear you do it? Hell yeah!”

Strawberry: OK! SOMDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!! (B6!!!!!!)

Zayne: “*Whoa!!! You actually hit that high B6 again!!! That was so sudden!!!! Damn… You had me startled for a second there!! But that was so good! That was amazing!!! Your whistle register is so damn good! You can sing at that pitch for a long time without getting tired, right…? Are you still feeling good…? Are you not tired at all…?!”

Strawberry: I will never get tired.

Zayne: “You will never get tired? Even if you did that for several minutes… or over an hour…? You won't get tired… at all? You could literally do it for hours without feeling exhausted?”

Strawberry: My body is not feeling exhausted… my throat yes.

Zayne: “Your body isn’t feeling exhausted… but your throat is…? I see… So as long as your body isn’t feeling exhausted… Then you can really do this whistle register thing for a long time, right…? Even if your throat becomes exhausted, you would still be able to whistle register… just not as long as you’d like to but longer than most people… correct?”

Strawberry: Yeah, correct.

Zayne: “I see… So your throat does get exhausted… But you can still continue to do your whistle register for quite a while longer. I see…”

Strawberry: You want to hear again Big daddy? ☺️

Zayne: “You want to whistle register again…? Yes, please! I wanna see if you can hit that high B6 again!”

Strawberry: DR ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYNE!!!!!! (B6!!!!!) 😮‍💨

Zayne: “Whoa!!! Daaaamn!!!! You hit that high B6 once more!!! You… You did it again, didn't you?! Damn… I can't believe you're still able to do that even though your throat is exhausted!! Is your throat okay, by the way? Is it in pain…? Or is it just really tired?”

Strawberry: A little bit tired.

Zayne: “Just a little bit tired…? I see. So do you think you can still do the whistle register one more time…?”

Strawberry: OK but this is last OK, my throat is about getting pain.

Zayne: “Got it. So one more… But I don’t want you to hurt your throat. So this is definitely your last one, okay?”

Strawberry: Ok. ZAAAAAAAAAAAAYNE!!!!!!!! (B6!!!!!!)

Zayne: “Damn!!!!!! Damn!!!!! You did it again!!! Are you sure you’re okay…? Your throat hasn’t been damaged or anything, right? I’m worried that if you continue to do the whistle register… your throat will become worse!”

Strawberry:.　Yeah- *cough!*

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

WAIT FOR PART 2 :)

[venuscnjunctpluto]

💫Beyonce has Venus conjunct Pluto (also Pluto conjunct her Asc) and I’m understanding this placement better as I have it myself in the 8th house. We need to love ourselves and the world. We don’t live in care bear world where this is possible so a lot of us grow up thinking power dynamics and having control over someone is the only way we can love without getting hurt. No the REAL answer is creating a better world where people feel free to love no matter their background, sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, etc… is the only way for us to love freely. I plan on volunteering a lot in the new year because I really want to embrace love which is limitless and unconfined. Dirty Computer by Janelle Monae and Anna Wintour by Azealia Banks embodied this concept greatly as well. I try to avoid certain songs that are rooted in trauma and looking for someone us to be everything for us. This sucked bc some of my favorite artists had to take a back seat including of Lana, Brent Faiyaz, Mariah the Scientist, Ariana Grande, Summer Walker, and Taylor Swift too.

💫I’m so proud of her as an artist that she’s gone from love song about a significant other to music that is meant to embrace a deeper love plutonian venuses are capable of. A love that can heal the world around us not just that trash man that cheats on us lol. We try to heal specific people with love which is why I think we gravitate towards people w darker backgrounds and trauma. When we should understand love isn’t what we need to search for because it’s already in us. We need FREEDOM. We become way more beautiful, more connected, more empathetic because we can deeply understand what we all what and need is: freedom. We need to reach that higher vibration of love (that extends beyond trauma bonding, romantic connections, capitalism, greed, hatred, jealousy) in our lifetime. Saturn was in Aquarius which is Beyonce’s 5th house so during that time she learned and developed a deep understanding of her creativity. (I think also relates to another libra rising Doja Cat and her new music addressing the issues that comes with being and artist in this age) This is why she came back with futuristic, space inspired, innovative, and pro-lgbt, women, and black centered music. She truly learned how to use her art to make positive change which is what Aquarius is all about. She’s been so successful with this tour because her power has always been in her heart.

💫Various Lyrics that stuck out to me from this era:

💫“We go up and down; lost and found searching for love. Looking for something that lives inside me” - Break My Soul

💫“Lend your soul to intuitions (this is the real love)”- My House

💫“I just talk my sh*t Casanova; Superstar supernova power pull em in closer” - Alien Superstar

💫“Renaissance the revolution. Pick me up even if I fall; let love heal us all” - My House

💫“It’s not the diamonds; it’s not the pearls I’m that girl. It’s not my man; it’s not my stance” - I’m That Girl