#Germany if you are listening take the bitch out | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

short-black-diamond · 8 months

Note

please can you do bf headcanons for kaiser and sae and rin please (fem reader)

thxx

yeheeheheyyy

German vocab: "Schätzchen" = cute-ification of "treasure"

---

"That's my boyfriend!"

Kaiser:

Ayo how I hate that bitch

Please don't request stuff about him in the future

But him as a boyfriend?

I guess he'd be pretty chill, but he'd like to have you on his lap a lot

like, in that one chapter where he examined Isagi, he'd for sure have you on his lap, while trying to figure out what made Isagi so different

and he'd just--- stroke your thigh?

Idk I think he would do something like that

anf then hmmm...I think he's rich

not filthy rich like Reo, but pretty rich

I think he'd also spoil you? like--he'd sometimes buy you jewellery, but other than that, he would buy you other stuff, which is much more useful

like, one time he bought you a new tablet because yours got coffee on it

his coffee

soccer dates don't @ me

he'd try to teach you soccer if you didn't already know how, and if you did, he'd have you running after him as he always took the ball away right under your heel

It was funny, and you were happy to see your boyfriend laughing and giggling when he teicked you over and over again by dribbling the ball around you, before he gave you a small kiss to your cheek and scored a goal

"Jeez, you need to do better if you want the ball, Schätzchen."

You huffed. "I hope this wasn't an insult.."

"I'd never insult you, ____."

You guys would also go through Germany, with him showing you a lot of sights and taking pictures of you, then some selfies and would also buy you a cute souvenir.

he's a gentle lover, who gives you soft kisses and holds your hand softly

I think he'd also bring you to a viennesse ball, just to dance viennesse waltzer with you with an expensive, victorian dress he bought you as you two danced the waltz in old fashioned clothing in an old fashioned building with old fasioned people

bonus points if it was a masquerade ball

(imagine if he told you he'd meet you at the ball and mistake another girl with you, thinking that it was you, and you arriving to him dancing with another girl who had similar features as you...just imagine the heartbreak...the drama...I'd dance with Ness then, just to spite Kaiser...maybe I'll write a fic about that?)

Sae:

If you read my last post, I guessed -correctly- that Sae's an ass guy

Excpect your butt to be warm and squeezed at all times, babe

No but seriously I'm so proud of myself for being right about something I didn't know was already canon

*pats my own shoulder proudly*

He's busy

He has to train

but if you want to come with him, he won't stop you

When he was with the U-20, and he agreed for you to come with him, he hated it the moment you stepped foot in the room where he and his team was in

Imgine the bloodlust he felt when Oliver and Sendo touched you and flirted with you like there was no tomorrow (they didn't know that you were together with sae)

"I'm Sae's girlfriend..?", you then said and Sae hugged you from behind.

"Yes, I am her boyfriend, so take your filthy hands off of her.", he seethed.

Safe to say, the two didn't really listen as they just kept flirting with you, and they got to feel Sae's wrath on the field as he just kicked the ball into their face and crotch area

Other than that, I'd expect him to be very clingy

he looks touch-starved

give this man some love

After practise, he would always take a quick shower before cuddling with you on his bed and just take a small nap, letting you do whatever you want, but don't move your legs

he once turned you around on your stomach with force before he just---let his face fall onto your ass cheeks

you have no idea why he has an obession with your butt but oh well

Rin:

Another touch-starved baby

But he enjoys your company, speak, the first weeks of you dating him were silent, but he always had a small smile on his face

but let me tell you- he blushed madly when you held his pinky with yours

it was actually the first time you touched him

boy couldn't breathe

what have you done ____???

However, as the days went on, Rin initiated the touch more and more, and after a few months came the first kiss, with him kissing you softly, but his lip was trembling

And a rin with a beet red face came to view

I think he'd talk very quietly to you, I don't know why, but I just--do, you know?

Like he only wants you to hear what he has to say to you.

and you love it

also expect him to buy you stuff you don't really need?

I mean, he means it in a good way, but do you actually need an owl plushie in all its natural colors?

"Rin...why?"

"I-I like owls...! ...and, you're my girlfriend...so I wanted to give you something I like.", cue him looking at you sadly, but with innocent eyes.

yeah, you kissed him breathless after that little confession

also like-- I don't think any of the blue lockers have a dominant bone when they have an s/o at first, which means that the boys would also be shy

and I can just imagine Rin taking many tries before he actually asks to hold your hand, or takes nearly an hour more time from his busy schedule to buy you flowers you weren't allergic to, but which you also haven't received yet

he's the type who'd try to bake you cookies, and only have a small error, like either not enough sugar or cocoa, or idk what

---

Okay and that's it! I hope I nailed it, tell me if I didn't!

Read you guys in the next post!

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stargirlstudio · 2 years

Text

You Are My Task [Part 1]

☆ Dmitri Antonov x fem!Reader

☆ Warnings: age gap (11 years apart), class difference

☆ Word Count: 2815

☆ Summary: As an assignment, Dmitri was tasked to protect a foreign diplomat's daughter. His disdain for beautiful coldhearted women like you made him weary and your disdain for intelligent social men made you ill. How could anything come from this?

☆ A/N: This series starts from the mid 70s up until 1986 when Season 4 takes place. This series will contain smut, so this is 18+. Chapters containing smut will be marked!

Part 2 ⇨

“Antonov!” Roman yelled out. The brown haired man ran over to him, giving him a firm grip on the shoulders. “I heard you’re assigned the diplomat’s daughter!” Dmitri rolled his eyes. “I heard from a friend of a friend that she’s easy on the eyes, but 2 pairs of bodyguards have already been dismissed. Yet they are sending you alone,” He teased. Dmitri had heard the same thing. The other bodyguards were apparently “unsatisfactory” and not fit to protect the diplomat’s daughter. However, he hasn’t heard about her appearance. “Maybe Dima can make some relations,” Wiggling his eyebrows. Dmitri pushed him off, one of the more insufferable things about his childhood friend.

“I have no interest in starting any relations with an assignment. Much less a-“

“Ohh you dirty bastard, I was just talking about political relations. It would do well for the country to have their men open different borders, right?” He joked again. “Maybe you can find yourself a wife after the job? Get a hefty payout and big rock. Women will come flocking to you,”

“No they won’t,”

“Are you kidding me?” Roman said incredulously. “You’re not blessed with gorgeous looks like me-“ Dmitri elbowed him. “But you’ve got the brooding, mysterious persona,”

“What persona?” Dmitri asked. Roman tutted just patting his shoulder again.

“You won’t understand yourself. I mean you can barely tell when someone fancies you,” Roman paused. “Maybe just pay attention to a woman for once, you’d know a lot about one if you listen,”

Dmitri chuckled, “You son of a bitch!” He smiled.

Dmitri opened the file once more, noticing how the chauffeur scoffed. He flipped through the pages quietly.

Name: (L/N), (F/N)

Age: 21

“Father is a diplomat, mother is a homemaker.” He said aloud. “Spent 1 university year in East Germany followed by 3 years in Boston, USA…currently on a gap year before graduate studies in Britain.” Dmitri noted the numerous photos of you. Graduation photos, study abroad photos, pictures of you on beaches, and some sketchy candid photos. He looked at the recent portrait of you with your parents, Roman wasn’t wrong about you being pretty. You had a beautiful smile, very pristine appearance.

“We’re here,” The driver said, looking at him through the rear view.

“Time to find out for myself,” He thought. Dmitri followed the man, the house he was at was actually an estate. A Russian businessman who was a close friend of the diplomat’s allowed the daughter to stay with her workers. It was an old estate, nothing that is even comparable to most villages. Dmitri looked at the numerous pillars and the paintings that decorated its walls. So much for political ideology, the excess will live in excess.

A door opening caught his attention, he whipped his head to see an older woman. She walked over, introducing herself. “You must be Mr. Antonov. I’m Emelia, Madame (L/N)’s caretaker. I heard many wonderful things about you,” She paused. “Come, you may impress us but it is truly the Madame’s impression you need to focus on. Be prepared, she’s quite fickle.” Dmitri walked up the grand stairs, listening intently to the caretaker and her speeches about the estate. She abruptly turned around, “I must say…since you’re by yourself and you seem intelligent enough. I do hope that you understand the Madame is just going through a lot. She’s kind but has such a cold exterior. Please understand,” We stopped in front of the numerous portraits of the businessman and his family. Emelia gestured for Dmitri to look at one particular photo. “This is the little miss,” He looked at the childhood photo, playing on the estate grounds. It was a young girl, with a few missing teeth smiling. “Please make yourself comfortable, the bathroom is right down the hall,” Emelia said as she let him sit on the sofa.

He laid back, looking at the patterned walls and the decorated ceiling. It really was a small palace when he thought about it. He smoked a cigarette waiting for the Madame to come out of her room, getting up and walking out. He walked down to the opposite end, admiring the plethora of paintings and family portraits. Until he heard giggling coming from one of the rooms.

“I have another bodyguard interview,” A woman’s voice said. He heard some chattering over a phone line. “How many more of these do I have to go through? I didn’t even look at the photo they sent me. Can you believe it, Milner? They sent me a catalog of men to choose from this time,” She laughed. “Let’s hope he’s not grotesque or disgusting,” She joked. He scoffed, until he heard the woman put the phone down. He hurried to the empty room, leaving the door ajar. From the crack he saw the back of the Madame. She peeked around the hall eventually closing the door .

He hurried back to the living room, just in time as he heard the click of the Madame’s heels down the hall. When the Madame walked in, he was stunned. She was much prettier in person, her hair was perfectly styled, pretty lips, and beautiful facial features. The way she carried herself was unbelievable. She wasn’t just easy on the eyes, she was beautiful. Dmitri had never seen someone so poised. Unbeknownst to him, he had sat up straighter. Daring to look at the one feature he had glossed over: her eyes.

“You must be the new bodyguard they sent,” She said, stalking around the opposite couch, grazing her lace gloves hand over it, observing him from head to toe.

“Yes, I’m Dmitri Antonov,” He spoke. “What do I call you?”

“My employees call me Madame (L/N). However, I would much rather have you call me Miss (L/N),” Dmitri nodded. She raised an eyebrow at the cigarette put out on the plate. It didn’t fall past Dmitri, he felt his face growing hot. “Tell me about yourself. What exactly makes you qualified? I’m curious because you’re alone,”

“I’ve had international experience before. Other than my mother tongue I also speak English. I’ve served before, as well,”

“Anything else?“ She said sternly.

“The pay is good too,” She raised her eyebrows again. Dmitri could have sworn he saw a smile.

She noticed Emelia walking past the room, stunned at the sight before her. “Honesty can only get you so far Mr. Antonov,” She whispered. “Let’s continue this conversation in English. Speak freely and as you wish, my employees aren’t fluent in English,” She paused, crossing her legs. “I must say Mr. Antonov, I’m impressed by your extensive language skills, I wasn’t expecting that. Looks can be quite deceiving,” Excuse me? “You’ll get your status in due time. But can I be honest with you Mr. Antonov, please work on your…etiquette,” She said as she eyed the cigarette once more. “I need to keep up appearances. Please understand,” She said in a vindictive manner.

Who does she think she is? He watched as she had a smug appearance. He almost hoped he was barred from taking the job ever. “Of course Miss (L/N). I wouldn’t want to embarrass you by being…grotesque or disgusting,” He got up, watching her raise her hand to her mouth. “Hope to hear of my job status soon, am I dismissed?”

“Yes,” She said curtly. “Please follow Emelia. We’re done here,” He watched as she stormed off into her room. So much for the pay, he was definitely not getting the job now.

Over the next few days, Dmitri had been mulling over the conversation. It was much worse than he could imagine. He hasn’t been called down to the boss, but he was absolutely seething. The way she grazed his eyes over him, nitpicking and judging everything he does. It’s clear she has her nose in the air, but one thing that stuck with him was her comment.

“I must say Mr. Antonov, I’m impressed by your extensive language skills, I wasn’t expecting that. Looks can be quite deceiving,” He remembered her saying. He hated the way the scene was burned into his mind. The laced finger tapping her lips, the condescending tone, her eyes, It was as if her eyes burned him, until he felt like a pile of ash. He was taken out of his thoughts by another employee of his.

“Antonov! Mr. Nazvanov wants to see you. It’s about your assignment,” He said. “You know I was actually one of the bodyguards who didn’t get the job,”

“Really?” Dmitri questioned. “What was the woman like?”

“She didn’t say anything. One swat of the hand and we were dismissed,” Odd. She didn’t even talk to them. “I mean. She didn't even look at us! She was silent! It was scary!” He joked.

Dmitri saw her face clearly. Nothing that blocked her features. She had a full conversation with him. “Are you telling the truth?”

“Yes!” He said incredulously. He said, opening the door to Mr. Nazvanov’s office. “You’ll probably have the same fate as the rest of us. Say hi to the next guy will you?” He whispered.

Mr. Nazvanov gave Dmitri a big smile. “Good morning, Dmitri, how are you?”

“I’m very well,” The man smiled.

“It’s been a few days since your interview, how did it go?” He asked.

“It was fine,” Dmitri replied. “We had a nice conversation I think,”

Nazvanov gave a hearty laugh, his toothy grin shining bright. “I knew you would be different. Just letting you know that tomorrow, Miss (L/N), would like to give you your status in person as well as have lunch with her?,” He flipped through a file. “What exactly did you say to her? I’m impressed,”

“Nothing too offensive I hope?” He wasn’t looking forward to going back to the estate, much less facing the woman he had been thinking about the past few days. It’s not like he can take another job as well paying as this one.

—

Finally, the place was calm once again. No strangers, no bodyguards, no interviews. You looked out at the expanse of land, nothing could be seen for miles except some mountains and trees. While it wasn’t your top pick, you had been extremely indebted to your father’s friend.

“Madame (L/N), lunch will be ready soon. Please get ready and head downstairs. A guest of your father’s will be coming,” You headed to the bathroom. You had always admired the vintage French styled interior — Emelia never let you forget about the history of the house. An homage to the businessman's late wife, a refined woman from Occitanie. It’s one of the finer things about having culturally knowledgeable people work for you. You relaxed in your porcelain bathtub, letting the aroma of aloe, bluebell, and chrysanthemums relax your body, lolling your head and noticing the unused ash tray that decorated your bathroom counter.

“Of course Miss (L/N). I wouldn’t want to embarrass you by being…grotesque or disgusting,” You remembered him saying. You sunk your head into your hands. How embarrassing, he must have overheard you when you were talking on the phone.

You remembered saying that line, flipping open the file that was sent to the house. This was the first time you had even opened it, thinking the interview would be like the rest. You were met with a photo of a man in his early 30s, dirty blonde hair buzzed short, clean shaven with very striking eyes. Even in the photo, it felt as if he was looking right through you.

When you heard a noise outside of your room that day you immediately hung up and went to check. Nothing in the hallways, just the faint smell of tobacco. When you closed the door you looked at the clock, noticing the heavy footsteps that walked to the end of the room. You came outside to smell the tobacco again, and just like that it was gone. It made your heart race, the smell was so unfamiliar something you haven’t smelled in a while, it was captivating. Everything was so pristine and orderly, but the smell was something that was not familiar in your home.

When you walked in, you noticed the bodyguard slouched back on the sofa. The same one from the photo. He was more handsome in person. His eyes more sunken in, a tiredness to his face, and eyes that made you question yourself. Who was he? Everything that could ever be but the one thing that stuck out the most was that same tobacco scent. He must have been the one that made that noise in the hallway, he heard you say you hoped he wasn’t grotesque or disgusting. And he wasn’t, but you weren’t going to let him know that.

When you walked into the dining room, it was surprising to see him again, already digging into his plate. You weren’t expecting him, you weren’t expecting anyone. Mr. Antonov looked up, gave you a toothy grin and shoved a large piece of omelet into his mouth. Emelia walked in, gesturing you to sit down in your usual chair, right across from the man you interviewed days ago. You couldn’t look him in the eye. It was too embarrassing. “Madame (L/N), Mr. Antonov will be your new personal bodyguard. I have already arranged for the maids to clean the adjacent guest room. Since he’s your personal guard, he will be staying at the estate,”

“But Emelia I didn’t sign off on this? Who authorized this?”

“Your father,” She said sternly. “He’s been quite impatient. You know he just wants to protect you.” You huffed. Picking away at your food. This is unbelievable! You thought that you could just push it off but it has been decided. You glanced at Dmitri, seeing that he had cleared his plate, patting his mouth with the cloth. You tried your best to just focus on your food but everything was wrong.

After lunch had ended, it was suggested that you and Dmitri get to know each other. “It’s only natural, I won’t be on your trip to Yakutsk, remember?” She said, “Please (f/n), now that we’re alone, try to get to know him. When I’m not there in a few months I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable with a stranger,”

You both walked the halls in silence. It felt like your whole body was burning up, you couldn’t stand to look at him. You felt angry. Angry at your father for not being here. Angry at yourself for whatever reason you couldn’t comprehend.

“Lunch was good today. Do you always eat breakfast foods around noon?” Dmitri asked. You kept your head forward, not wanting to meet him in the eye.

“I tend to wake up later. I don’t wake up early,” You told him. You nervously picked at your lace gloves. You couldn’t hide away behind a hat or sunglasses. Or even your small fascinator. Most of that afternoon was spent with questions. You answered curtly, just enough to be satisfactory or enough to the point he didn’t push further. Dmitri walked ahead, not noticing you stopping in your tracks. He turned around, an inquisitive look in his eye. “Mr. Antonov,”

“Yes, Miss (L/N)?” He said.

“I’m sorry,” You said quietly. He walked a little forward, turning his ear toward you. “I’m sorry,” You said.

He smiled. “What for?”

“For what I said to you. I said that looks can be deceiving. I didn’t mean to offend you,” He huffed. “I hope you can forgive me,”

“Do you actually mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“The apology,” He said. “The way I hear it, it just seems you are embarrassed. We can just move past this, it’s fine,” Embarrassed? This was outrageous. “You don’t need to apologize. I felt humiliated at the time, but I would rather have you apologize to me when you’re actually sorry rather than…what’s the term…keeping appearances?”

Your heart burned, it felt like it was swelling, your skin was hot – matching the fire in your lungs. You couldn’t believe the man. Of course you felt sorry, was saying it not enough? Was allowing in your home not enough? You stayed silent the entire time, walking along the halls until you reached the bottom of the stairs. Emelia came out, escorting him along with you.

“Well, it was nice seeing you again. I hope my etiquette was okay?” He answered with a grin. You acutely felt the way your fingers dug into your palm, of course the action didn’t go unnoticed by Dmitri.

“It was,” You said angrily.. He nodded his head and gave a goodbye, watching him be driven off into the distance. Emelia turned to you and smiled, holding your wrist and shutting the door.

“He seems so nice,” She told you. That could be further from the truth.

Tag List: @druigswh0ree @h3k3t

#fics #stranger things #dmitri antonov #dmitri antonov x reader #enzo stranger things #fanfic #fanfiction #enzo x reader #fic: you are my task

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preet-01 · 27 days

Text

In 2023, I wrote We've Never Hooked Up during the Lewis/Merc contract negotiations and a reporter asked if Lewis and Toto had hooked up about the contract. Now, what was originally a one-shot is a story told in three parts. This is part 2 and part 3 will be out in about a week

Word Count: 1555

The plans to spend the summer break together fall through before early July.

It isn’t because Lewis is annoyed by how bad the car was and how no matter what he did the team barely seemed interested in listening to his feedback. And it wasn’t due to the continued fights they’d been having about his contract – or how Toto refused to advocate for him with the team in Germany. They’d agreed ages ago to not let work interfere with their relationship.

Not to mention that Toto has meetings that he should focus on. The German headquarters business didn’t stop just because Formula One was on a summer break. As CEO, Toto needed to work and Lewis didn’t want to spend the few weeks he had off fighting for some time with Toto.

So Lewis decides to make his own plans.

Maybe he’ll do some traveling with Miles, Spinz, and all the others. They had talked about a trip to Brazil. Or he could go island hopping with Daniel, chasing the warm sun and sandy shores. He had been meaning to spend more one-on-one time with Daniel after everything that had happened last year – it was bad when both Seb and Fernando were concerned. Maybe he could take up Seb on his offer to visit him in Switzerland and see his animals named after drivers. As great as his current friendship was with Fernando, he did miss seeing Seb every weekend and bitching about all things FIA-related.

“Will you be attending Google Camp this year?” John asks. The older man had offered him a ride to England on his private jet after the Austrian Grand Prix and with most of the Mercedes team leaving Sunday night, Lewis had taken him up on the offer without hesitation. He hadn’t had time to catch up with John in a long time, so it was as good an opportunity as any. Just the two of them and their respective security on the private jet — Seb would probably chastise him about it.

“I hadn’t intended on attending,” Lewis replies – he had declined the invitation weeks ago when the plan had been to be on some remote island with just Toto and a skeleton staff as company. “I already declined the invite before my original plans fell through,” he adds.

‘Hhm,” John nods, “come with me. I have a plus one and those events tend to be dreadful without good company.”

Lewis can’t help the laugh that escapes him. John had been downright miserable at Google Camp the year they had met. Stuck in some pissing contest conversation between Zuckerberg and Musk, John had jumped at the opportunity to pull him into a separate conversation when their eyes met across the ruins.

Google Camp hadn’t happened in 2020 for obvious reasons. Lewis didn’t know about 2021, but he’d been busy with other stuff. And in 2022, he’d gotten a few calls from John about the event. Most of them complaining about the lack of good company with a mind for racing beyond just “fast cars go vroom.”

He doesn’t commit to going but does tell John that he’ll think about it.

It wouldn’t be the worst way to spend the summer break. Lewis quite liked John’s company and he liked Sicily. They’d had a grand old time during the few days they’d spent at Google Camp together in 2019.

____

He goes to Sicily.

Of course, he goes to Sicily.

He goes and he lets John plan their entire trip. He lets the control slip out of his own hands and into John’s — trusting that he wouldn’t be a disaster at planning.

They have a private villa at the Verdura Resort that is probably much too big for just two people, but it has a pool and is one of the more beautiful places he’s stayed at during his life so far. There’s of course a lineup of Ferraris there just for their use and private chefs well versed in cooking vegan food.

Google Camp is well not so different from how Lewis remembers it and it quickly turns into an Italian vacation with John taking him to places Lewis had never thought of visiting before. Whisking him away from Sicily in one of the many Ferraris until they reach the harbor where a boat awaits to take them to mainland Italy.

He doesn’t think of the missed calls between himself and Toto or the short messages exchanged. Neither of them seemed to catch the other at an opportune time. Instead, he focuses on John and attempts to tell the man that there are better ways to have a sweater hanging from one’s shoulders than how John tends to have them. However, he does admit that it is an endearing idiosyncrasy.

And in the coming months, he does his best to not think about the promises that John had whispered in his ear as they lay under the blazing Italian sun. Or the taste of fermented grapes and ripe strawberries as a million stars shined down on them. Or how he’d laughed more in those few days with John than he had with Toto in the past few years. No, he doesn’t think of that at all…

Lewis ignores it the best that he can, for as long as he can — he’d always been very good at compartmentalizing and pushing forward.

Just as plans for the summer break spent on some remote island fall through, so do the plans for winter break. They don’t go to Toto’s home in the Austrian countryside or visit the Christmas markets. Well, Lewis doesn’t go, Toto does.

Lewis instead flies out to Brazil with Miles, Spinz, and all his other friends. None of them mention that the private jet they use isn’t the one that Lewis would usually rent or the one he’d occasionally borrow from Toto, but borrowed from one John Elkann.

Brazil is everything he’d needed after the season, after fighting with his car time and time again. It’s a necessary break that he had needed to decompress and just think.

It’s an eye-opening vacation, to say the least.

Things need to change because as Lewis had told Toto months ago, he didn’t have years and years to keep fighting.

Just as he’s about to call Toto so they can talk through everything like they normally do, a different billionaire is calling him.

“Hi,” Lewis answers, unable to help the smile that breaks out when he answers John’s call.

“Hello, Lewis,” John replies, “how is Brazil?”

Lewis goes into the details about the vacation. Everything that they have done so far and everything that they plan to do in the coming days. John, ever so attentive, makes his own recommendations and tells Lewis about the places that he loved growing up. “You lived in Brazil?” Lewis questions, he had not been aware of that. How it hadn’t come up in their many conversations, he doesn’t know. Just as he’d thought that he’d learned everything about John, the man reveals something new – some new avenue to take their already hours-long conversations.

“Briefly when I was young. I attended primary school in England and then Brazil before we moved to Paris when I was in my teenage years,” John answers. “But it has always been somewhat of a home as many of my earliest memories are from there and I have gone back to explore the country many times since,” he explains.

“Tell me more,” Lewis says, getting comfortable on his bed as all thoughts of Toto and his future fly out the window.

If Lewis spends the rest of the day on the phone with John, just talking and definitely not flirting, then that’s no one’s business except his own. And he certainly doesn’t invite John to join him in Brazil. He just so happens to have business in Brazil obviously, nothing to do with Lewis.

As John Elkann makes declarations of unconditional devotion and presses kisses onto the most intimate parts of Lewis Hamilton, Toto Wolff is in the company of his other driver.

It is a far cry from how Toto had expected to spend his winter months ago when Lewis had joked about the two of them never hooking up during a press conference. Then he’d imagined a shorter man with tattoos on dark skin and a gap-toothed smile in his bed. He’d imagined Lewis curled up around him as they sought relief from the cold Austrian winter. He’d imagined a quiet vacation spent in one another’s company and visiting the Christmas markets that Lewis had fallen in love with.

Instead, his winter is spent in the company of George who is nothing like Lewis. Instead of a private vacation with visits to Christmas markets, he’s at karting tracks, ski charity events, and public places where people easily recognize them both. Instead, his winter is spent with someone who is still not fully sure of his position with Toto.

George is still staying at his place in Oxford when Lewis finally calls him about their usual pre-season coffee. Toto doesn’t kick him out, can’t find it in himself to do so. Not when George had looked so lovely and had taken so long to get comfortable.

No, George has an event to go to that morning anyway. It would be fine.

#lewis/john elkann #lewis/toto #elkilton

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slovoricbutbetter · 6 months

Text

Anarchy Class for Subs and Bottoms: Intro

[slaps chalkboard with a spanking paddle] so! class is in session! today we'll be talking about anarchism! i know, the saying 'no gods, no masters' may be quite alarming to a lot of you, but please, do try to stop wiggling in your restraints and listen.

[picks up chalk and quickly longhands a nearly incomprehensible word.]

so the core tenant of anarchism, as i see it, is responsibility. [slaps the word for emphasis.] responsibility for yourself, your community, and the natural world around you. don't groan now! i know you submissive ass bitches like daddy to come in and take care of things, as well as the threat of punishment to keep you in line, but we must all learn to function on our own, and daddy needs support too, so suck it up or else help me god. [corrects glasses]

now, there are three main pillars of responsibility. number one! [longhands another scribble that might just be the word 'penis' but it's very loopy so who can tell] recognising and differentiating between instances where you do or do not have control. what i mean by that is, of course, is that you'll have extra homework- beat your head against the desk again and i'll assign more- on the nature of systemic issues such as racism, ableism and queerphobia in late stage capitalism, so you are better equipped to handle this pillar.

in more familiar terms, consider a potential dom. if they live halfway across the world and both of you are poor, the distance is not something you can control- however you can change other things to accommodate each other if you so wish. neither of you can take responsibility for handling the distance at the moment, and neither of you is responsible in case long distance relationships don't work for them. in other areas, however, you still have responsibility.

number two! [two words this time, they definitely say 'tasty clit'] recognising your limitations. if you are disabled, you should not be held responsible for things you physically can not do- so for example, if your disability prevents you from leaving the house, you can not be faulted for not doing mutual aid. on a similar note, taking a break is not a sin! you can not bear the load- do not snicker in class! brats, all of you- you can not bear the weight of responsibility at all times, sometimes you need to let go and be taken care of, or left alone.

in more familiar terms, limits and boundaries! we all know if a dom doesn't let you have them, that's a red ass flag the size of germany. so you have to allow yourself to have them, too- none of that 'i don't have limits do whatever you want daddy' bullshit! it's not sexy and only really shows you are not a well-established human being.

number three! [longhands 'application' beautifully and perfectly readably on the desk] if neither of the former two apply, fucking do it! get your head out your ass, take a breath, and start on the goal you wish to achieve. if you want there to be a union at your work place, start one- you're human and you have power. if you want to join a mutual aid circle, find one- the internet is a wonderful place with so much information at your fingertips. you are capable of inducing change, and while that means you might induce bad change, it also means you might shape a better future.

in more familiar terms, say there is an issue in the relationship- you can sulk and get depressed about it, or you can communicate with your dom and clear it up. now!! onto the most important part of the class.

imagine the stupidest, most pointless rule you can. now imagine your dom sets it along with dozens of harsh and stupid rules, doesn't explain them, and punishes you until you're a sobbing mess whenever you break them. they don't give aftercare, and your begging to shift the rules to be ever so slightly softer, easier, more logical, falls on deaf ears. in fact, they crack down harder whenever you try to bring up how the rules are unfair. they tell you you can never leave because they're the best there is, and you clearly deserve it anyway because you're failing at the rules.

[poignant pause.]

the state is the dom. how much do any of you know about the legal system? have you ever tried getting into it? it's dense as fuck, and purposefully so- it doesn't exist to protect us, it exists to protect the profits of some rich motherfuckers on their golden thrones sipping the most expensive champagne in ivory towers or whatever it is the one percent do. i know, i know some of you motherfuckers could eroticise what i have described, but for the love of absolute fuck, try to imagine living like that every day, with no breaks, half starved and cold and lonely.

oh, did i mention you never even got a choice on whether you got into a relationship with this guy? 'cause you didn't, you were their child bride. imagine all that shit! every red flag, right? and we just let it govern our lives like it's normal not to have a single say in how your community is ran! don't you think taking on a little bit of responsibility is better than this?

[looks around the class] okay! i'll hand out the keys to your cuffs now and we'll have a q&a. i will still be expecting the homework- what did i say about banging your head against the desk! [looks at the camera] this class is a fucKING NIGHTMARE

#...#i don't know what you followed me for but uh. this is what you get lmao #might make this into a series. next tag is the one i'll use in such a case #bd/sm classroom #bd/sm kink #bd/sm community #anarchism #anarchist #politics #long post #roleplay #school #god fucking help me #slovo talks

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insufferableprotagonistpoll · 18 days

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Round 2

Propaganda why Tony Stark is insufferable:

She’s a hypocrite who is ready to restrict the freedom of others when they make one mistake, but when he makes a mistake he figures he’s able to handle himself

Super long, sorry lol

Thinking about how in Homecoming when Peter accidentally caused that boat to get split in half because the Vulture’s gun exploded and Tony was acting like as if Peter was completely in the wrong for going there just because he did it without his permission. He was acting like as if Peter was out of line and “disobeyed him”, trying to act like his father. And then I remember how in CACW he’s the one who scouted Peter in the first place just because he saw he might be useful against a personal squabble between him and Captain America despite knowing that he was a kid and he’s just now acknowledging how dangerous it is because Peter “acted on his own”

Completely hijacking Peter’s superhero story and trying to control his every move (Training wheels protocol and baby monitor thing he put in the suit), acting like Peter should’ve known that Tony would send someone in despite the fact that he’d been ignoring him for 2 months since Civil War and not keeping him updated on anything!!

How the hell is peter supposed to know Tony is going to listen to him when he treats him like a kid instead of a superhero when it’s convenient for him? And when Tony loses his temper after Peter says he’s 15 not 14 like “the adult is talking” bitch he could literally flatten you without your suit!!!

I guess in a way he is acting like a father but like the absentee kind. He’s more like a sperm donor father trying to act like he has any rights over Peter’s life smh.

It’s not that reprimanding Peter for the situation is bad, but the way he makes it seem as if Peter is irredeemable as if Tony wasn't a literal weapons dealer lmfao. He could’ve said what was the truth about it without completely invalidating him saying shit like “no thanks to you” after Peter asked if everyone is okay when it’s literally thanks to Peter finding a lead on those guys in the first place that they were even noticed and it’s not like the FBI being there could’ve in no way caused a similar situation.

And then near the end of the movie when he’s getting crushed by the building rubble screaming and crying for someone to help him where the fuck is Tony?? That scene just proved that he never needed Tony’s suit in the first place to be Spider-Man since he had to use 100% his own strength to lift it off of him. I know he would’ve found the motivation even if Tony hadn’t been involved in the first place to give him the suit, take it away from him and have the words “if you’re nothing without the suit you shouldn’t have it“ echo in his head. Why did Tony even take the suit away? Like as if he expects Peter to stop being spoderman without it??? Holy fuck. This is why you don’t make it out of endgame /j /srs.

When Tony took this suit away from Peter he was like “God I sound like my dad“ shouldn’t that be a red flag to him? Wasn’t he literally just saying that he wished his dad was better than he was?? Lmfao

Tony is so annoying. When they first meet he straight up bullies Peter into fighting for his personal bullshit, insults and objectifies Aunt May in front of him, spits into his trashcan and is in general being pushy af. He blackmails Peter when he doesn’t wanna come to Germany with him AND HE DOESNT EVEN EXPLAIN WHY HE WANTS HIM TO COME. Uncomfortable vibes lol.

Tony being the one to tell peter “if Captain America wanted to hurt you he would’ve” when Peter was trying to state his case, yet HE’S also the one who put Peter in harms way when he didn’t even want to go with him???

Telling Peter that he should stick to being a “friendly neighborhood Spider-Man” (stealing his thing once again) when that’s what Peter _was_ doing before Tony took him out of his zone and filled his head with grander things to be apart of….bitch? Die. Ohh waaaait (jkjk) but yeah

There’s the usual “he’s a war criminal who only felt bad about it when he realized his weapons were killing white Americans as well as Arab people” reason, and also he’s just super annoying. You had to be there for the original Avengers shitty dialogue a la “we have a Hulk” that had Tumblr in a vicious chokehold. Also he was supposed to FINALLY go away after destroying all his suits in Iron Man 3 but he just… didn’t! Which is bullshit.

Portrayed as a hero because? He chose to no longer mass produce war weapons and bombs after suffering the consequences. Huge hypocrite. Doesn't care about anyone but himself. Will backstab people if they believe in human rights when it's inconvenient to him. Seen as a hero while he's the personification of privileged people saying they're not privileged

>Makes weapons

>Billionaire

>Made multiple AI Surveillance Robots

>Gaslight a child into fighting a super soldier in a foreign country for him

>His fans are annoying

Propaganda why Stolas is insufferable:

Creator’s pet who can do no wrong and is constantly coddled and his shitty actions are handwaved away.

Sexually exploiting the main character, the darling of his transphobic creator, narrative constantly makes excuses for his behavior, physically abusive to his imp servants.

Essentially hijacked the entire show to be about his uwu sadness that the other main character, whom he coerced into a sexual relationship while the other was being shot at, doesn't love him.

#tony stark #marvel cinematic universe #stolas #helluva boss #insufferable protagonist poll #insufferable protagonist tournament #tournament poll

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wowbright · 1 year

Text

Fic: A Misunderstanding

Klaine Valentine’s Challenge 2023: “Same Old Country Love Song" by Brian Falduto (Day 9 prompt)

Words: ~2000 words

Rating: Teen and Up

Summary: The missionaries have a double date with Chandler and his boyfriend.

I’m back with more vignettes from my Mormon!Klaine universe for Klaine Valentines 2023! This vignette takes place between Sweet to My Taste and Summer Skies.

My Mormon!Klaine Masterpost.

Thanks to @honeysucklepink for reminding me of Rumtopf! (And @gleefulpoppet and @coffeegleek for listening and brainstorming as well.)

--------

It wasn't Blaine's fault. Not really. It was a misunderstanding. Surely, God would forgive him for that.

Everything had started out so well. Ever since Blaine’s call to Chandler asking for help figuring out if he was gay, they had become fast friends and persistent texting buddies. Chandler had helped Blaine through his freak outs. Blaine had sent a coded announcement after coming out to (and kissing) Kurt, and Chandler had responded appropriately with heart and fireworks emojis.

It had been sweet of Chandler to invite them over for dinner. He’d done it before, of course, but now the invitation had no hidden motives, since he was no longer trying to get into Kurt’s pants. It was friendship and kindness and “a sort of celebration of the fact that you two are no longer being mutual idiots,” as Chandler put it.

His boyfriend Jean, whom they had met briefly at the quadruple baptism, was there. He was intense, and started the evening out on an uncomfortable note. “So, you're the famous Elder Hummel,” he’d said in his thick French accent, folding his hands together and cracking his knuckles with a grotesque a series of pops after Chandler had disappeared back into the kitchen to finish preparations.

“Famous?” answered Kurt, unperturbed. “If you say so.”

“I do. And I can see the allure—though I understood it a little better when you walked out of the baptismal font in your soaked whities. It's like a wet T-shirt contest, but with Jesus.”

“Hey!” Blaine snapped. “That is no way to talk to my boyfriend.”

"Calm down,” said Jean Baptiste. “It was a compliment.”

“Jean, are you being an asshole?” Chandler called in a singsong from the kitchen. His face appeared around the door jamb. “My little bear, this is not a competition.” And then, to the missionaries, as if Jean weren’t there at all, “He’s super competitive. Likes to psyche out everyone else at auditions, talent competitions, reality TV shows— Have I mentioned he was a finalist on France’s and Germany’s Got Talent? The tabloids couldn't get enough of him. Everyone loves a cocky son of a bitch with a heart of gold.”

“I don’t have a heart of gold,” Jean grumbled.

“Right, so that’s why you insisted your competitor get a retry after that technical failure, even though it meant she won.”

Jean crossed his arms. “Losing in a fair competition is no shame. Winning on a technicality would have been humiliating.”

“See?” Chandler leaned over Jean and hugged him from behind. “He's all pudding inside. And Jean, you don’t need to intimidate Elder Hummel. My interest in him was fleeting, and he definitely has no interest in me.”

Jean cocked an eyebrow at Kurt. “Why not? Chandler’s perfect. Are you blind?”

Chandler rubbed Jean’s shoulder. “Because his heart belongs to Elder Anderson, Jean. Now play nice while I finish up in the kitchen. Remember, not everything is a contest.”

That wasn't the misunderstanding. And it had quickly evolved into a pleasant dinner. Jean calmed down and proved not to be without charm. He warmed up as Blaine asked questions about the TV shows and his studies in Munich, and he became utterly entranced by Kurt when he discovered their shared interests in costuming and Celine Dion—and anyone entranced by Kurt was alright in Blaine's book, as long as they didn't take it too far. While Jean didn't ding any bells for Blaine, but he could see why Chandler was so enamored with him. They were both intense, all-or-nothing types, with Chandler’s cheerfulness smoothing out Jean’s hard edges, and Jean’s pragmatism balancing Chandler's flightiness.

They were cute. And gay. Blaine had to keep reminding himself of that—they were, all of them, gay. They were on a double date. He had to remind himself of that not because he might actually ever forget it, but because everything felt so normal, so comfortable—more comfortable turn all the double dates he'd gone on in high school. This was supposed to feel new and strange and different. But it felt like returning home.

The moment he realized he could hold hands with Kurt in front of them, and that Kurt would happily take it, brushing his thumb against the back of Blaine’s hand and letting Blaine run his fingers over Kurt’s CTR in unspoken gratitude—Blaine had never felt more accepted by a group of people than he did in that moment.

Dinner was wonderful: vichyssoise with crusty bread and so much delicious butter, with sharp spring greens with radishes on the side; watching Kurt come out of his shell, playfully dueting on Celine Dion songs with Jean, his face so relaxed, his smile so happy; seeing that other men could appreciate Kurt’s beauty, too; and Kurt looking at Blaine, like he lit up the room and the stars as well.

The misunderstanding came later.

Dessert was a luscious pound cake with the option of caramel drizzle and whipped cream on top.

“No Rumtopf?” Jean asked when Chandler set the dessert tray on the table. “But you like it so much with Rumtopf, mon chéri. Have you run out?”

“Me? Run out? Of course not, little bear. I make enough every year to last at least two years. But they”—Chandler glanced at the missionaries—“don't drink alcohol.”

“What is Rumtopf?” Blaine asked. “I'm not familiar with that drink.”

"It's not a drink,” said Jean. “It's a sort of fruit sauce made with rum alcohol.”

“And sugar,” Chandler said, his eyes wide with enthusiasm. “So. Much. Sugar.”

Blaine eyed Kurt, who showed no signals of being scandalized by the mention of Rumtopf. The opposite, really. He smiled sweetly at Blaine. He rubbed his thumb over the outside of Blaine’s thigh and said, “We Mormons do love ourselves some sugar.”

It felt to Blaine like Kurt was referring to something altogether more carnal than dessert. He turned back to Chandler, attempting to recover the ability to speak. “We— We drink— We don't drink alcohol, but it's fine to use in cooking. Do you want to try it, Elder Hummel?”

Chandler snickered. They'd sat through an entire dinner, and he still could not seem to get over the fact that the missionaries could hold hands in front of company, but were physically incapable of referring to each other by their first names under the same circumstances.

“Sure, I'll try it,” said Kurt. “If it’s on offer.” Those words, too, seemed to drip with sensual meaning. Yes, Kurt, I’m on offer. Anytime. Always, for you.

So Chandler got out the Rumtopf. Blaine had expected something like a raspberry coulis, but it was much more substantial than that. Large chunks of fruit floated in a rich, red syrup. There were tiny strawberries, whole red currants and raspberries, pitted cherries, halved apricots, sliced peaches—like a progression through the German summer, but instead of being separated out over weeks and months, the flavors merged together into a unified chorus. No, a symphony. A symphony like the one he had attended with Kurt, when they’d held hands in the dark and the world felt new and bright, and Blaine had watched Kurt lean back in his seat, his eyes closed in thrall to the music, and he was so beautiful, and Blaine felt an intense joy and also a longing—to be everything to Kurt, to be one with him, to carry him through the darkness and share a life in the brightness of the sun.

How had Blaine not known he was in love?

They all enjoyed some Rumtopf with their poundcake, and then Blaine enjoyed it on its own, in big spoonfuls right on his plate, because it was delicious and Chandler said to go ahead, there was plenty, it was meant to be enjoyed. Blaine searched for every fruit and tasted it individually, biting through the medley of flavors to find its unique voice.

And Blaine laughed. He laughed because the Rumtopf was so delicious and also because Jean was very funny. Blaine hadn't noticed this during the savory portion of their meal, but during dessert, it became obvious. If he stopped to think about it, he couldn't discern anything different in Jean’s tone or delivery. But it was true. He was hilarious, and Blaine could barely stop laughing long enough to take another bite of fruit.

Kurt was laughing, too, and he was so stunning, and Blaine didn't worry that he should look away or try to pull a poker face, because here, he didn't have to hide anything. “I love your laugh. Did you know that?” Blaine said, caught in the blue of Kurt’s eyes. “I love it because you’re amazing and you deserve to feel joy.”

“Awwww,” Chandler cooed from across the table and squeezed Jean's hand.

Kurt, however, did not coo. He eyed Blaine suspiciously.

Blaine, in turn, eyed Kurt’s plate. His beloved had consumed one slice of pound cake with a dab of Rumtopf. There was no way that little spoonful had contained all the complexity of the sauce. It hadn't even included a representative of each fruit. This concerned Blaine. His beloved deserved everything good. “You don't want more Rumtopf, Kurt? How can you not want more?”

“Finally,” Chandler sighed in loud relief. “This last-name-only business was getting creepy.”

But Kurt looked startled. Then worried. His long sexy eyebrows furrowed together. His delectable mouth pursed into a frown. “Do you think maybe the sugar is getting to you a little, Elder Anderson?”

“Call me Blaine, love. We can do that here! And, no, not at all.” Blaine scooped up a half apricot and spooned it into his mouth. The symphony exploded on his tongue. “It's like that time we went to the orchestra. It's complicated and sweet, and my heart feels like it's going to burst, I loved you so much back then and I didn't even know it. Isn't that a shame?” Kurt didn't answer. He looked like a cloudy day in winter. Blaine couldn't understand. Maybe Kurt didn't like to be reminded of Blaine’s stupidity. But somehow, that made Blaine want to confess it even more. “Isn't that a shame?” he repeated, turning now to Chandler and Jean Baptiste. “I mean, you, Chandler, you know how hot he is, and you haven’t even seen him in blue jeans. Or burgundy jeans. Or the white ones with tiny navy pinstripes that he bought in the Altstadt—the way they fit, he looks so fine. I mean, Kurt is always looking fine, but the first time I saw him put on those jeans, I got so many butterflies in my stomach they couldn’t fit in there so they flew down to my penis, and I got so hard I didn’t know what to do with myself. Well, not until we got home and I could finally get into the shower and—”

Now Chandler's eyes went wide. He seemed to be suppressing a laugh. Blaine didn't understand why Chandler would be laughing. This was serious business. This was the stuff of Blaine’s heart. “I don't think it's the sugar, Elder Hummel. I think it's the alcohol.”

A bit of chaos ensued. People talking over each other and around each other. Blaine did not like seeing Kurt angry. He kept reaching for Kurt to calm him down, and Kurt kept slapping his hand away.

“I wasn't even going to serve it to you two!” Chandler squealed in his own defense. “But you said it was OK!”

“It's OK if alcohol is cooked out,” Kurt said sternly. “How should I know that a fruit sauce isn't cooked?”

“How was I supposed to know that cooking was required?” Chandler retorted. “I'm not a Mormon!”

Jean rubbed soothing circles over Chandler's back. It wasn't fair. Why was Chandler letting Jean touch him, but Kurt wouldn't let Blaine touch him? Jean frowned. (Too much frowning going around.) “I feel bad now. I'm the one who brought it up.”

“It's not your fault," Kurt sighed, the wind blowing out of him. “And it's not your fault, either, Chandler. It was a misunderstanding.” The tension was gone from Kurt’s shoulders. Blaine thought maybe now Kurt would let him take his hand.

He didn’t.

#klaine fanfiction #klainevalentines2023 #mormon!klaine #wowbright writes fic #TFT allusions #cw alcohol #to be continued

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queen-mabs-revenge · 9 months

Text

Good-morning, Revolution

Good-morning, Revolution!

You're the very best friend

I ever had.

We gonna pal around together from now on.

Say, listen, Revolution:

You know, the boss where I used to work,

The guy that gimme the air to cut down expenses,

He wrote a long letter to the papers about you:

Said you was a trouble maker, an alien-enemy,

In other words a son-of-a-bitch.

He called up the police

And told 'em to watch out for a guy

Named Revolution.

You see,

The boss knows you're my friend.

He sees us hangin' out together.

He knows we're hungry, and ragged,

And ain't got a damn thing in this world —

And are gonna do something about it.

The boss's got all he needs, certainly,

Eats swell,

Owns a lotta houses,

Goes vacationin',

Breaks strikes,

Runs politics, bribes police,

Pays off congress,

And struts all over the earth —

But me, I ain't never had enough to eat.

Me, I ain't never been warm in winter.

Me, I ain't never known security —

All my life, been livin' hand to mouth,

Hand to mouth.

Listen, Revolution,

We're buddies, see —

Together,

We can take everything:

Factories, arsenals, houses, ships,

Railroads, forests, fields, orchards,

Bus lines, telegraphs, radios,

(Jesus! Raise hell with radios!)

Steel mills, coal mines, oil wells, gas,

All the tools of production,

(Great day in the morning!)

Everything —

And turn 'em over to the people who work.

Rule and run 'em for us people who work.

Boy! Them radios —

Broadcasting that very first morning to USSR:

Another member the International Soviet's done come

Greetings to the Socialist Soviet Republics

Hey you rising workers everywhere greetings —

And we'll sign it: Germany

Sign it: China

Sign it: Africa

Sign it: Poland

Sign it: Italy

Sign it: America

Sign it with my one name: Worker

On that day when no one will be hungry, cold, oppressed,

Anywhere in the world again.

That's our job!

I been starvin' too long,

Ain't you?

Let's go, Revolution.

— Langston Hughes

#langston hughes #good morning revolution #revolutionary poetry #socialism #practicing reciting this out loud and let me tell you this is electric to read

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peonierose · 1 year

Text

Strange Encounters

Chapter 2

Nightbound AU vs. Hänsel & Gretel

Book: Nightbound

Characters involved: Hänsel van Andresen (M!OC), Gretel van Andresen (F!OC), Grey (M!OC), Nik Ryder (M!MC), Katherine (F!MC)

Words: 3,000+

Type: Series

Rating: Teen / A few curse words

Summary: Hänsel and Gretel arrive in New Orleans and meet some old friends. Will they be able to help them with the case?

A/N: Side note: This story has been a year in the making and I hope you’ll give it a chance. A massive thank you to these wonderful people for being super excited for this story and helping me with it. @annieruok94 ❤️ @doriopenheart 🧡

Side note: In case you missed Chapter 1

If you’d like to listen to the songs that inspired for this chapter here’s a list

Strange encounters

We flew in from the Black Forest in Germany and landed in New Orleans after a ten-hour flight. We had to make a stop in London, then continued to New Orleans.

Which my dearest brother complained all the way.

”Do you think we’re close?“ Hänsel asked.

I roll my eyes at my brother.

”You can be in a stake-out for hours? But can’t be on a ten-hour flight?“ I ask him while I try to eat some of the food on the plane.

He just shrugs and puts his headphones on.

We’re currently at The Graveyard Shift right in the heart of the French Quarter. Owned by none other than Garrus. A Fae who’s no longer living among his kind.

Garrus was the heir of a Fae viscount before the Fae cast him out. He remains exiled until this day. He was banished for running cons and swindling magic off the upper crust

Garrus is an incredible guy. He greeted us at the door with hugs and even gave Hänsel a kiss.

Hänsel was weirded out, to say the least, but he got over it.

The bar is dimly lit. We’re both sitting on wooden chairs at a table in the far back enjoying our drinks.

I lean back in my chair while flipping through a magazine I bought at the airport. As we’re waiting for Nik and Katherine to arrive. Nighthunters.

Nighthunters are as the name is already giving away hunters. They hunt all supernaturals. Just like Hänsel and I. Though we don’t call ourselves Nighthunters. We’re simply known as Hänsel & Gretel.

“I missed New Orleans,“ I say while I devour a beignet. Sighing in pure contentment. Oh my god. I could eat beignets every single day. Sugary goodness.

Hänsel scoffs and squats away at a mosquito.

“Yeah. The mosquitos. The heat. Real great,“ he says.

I take an apple I bought from a vendor earlier and hand it to Hänsel.

“Don’t be a downer. Here have an apple,“ I say.

He looks at the apple suspiciously.

”It’s not the snow white effect. Just take the apple,“ I say and offer it to him.

“Thank you loveliest sister of mine,“ he says through a bite.

I sigh.

“Shut up and eat,“ I flip to another page without looking up.

“Geez. You compliment a woman and she almost beats you over the head with it. Women are mysterious,“ he’s finished the apple. All that’s left is the core.

I give him a stare and smile softly.

“That’s because you haven’t figured us out yet dearest brother of mine,“ I wink and he rolls his eyes at me.

“Whatever,“ he replies and I chuckle in response.

I’m going through the magazine. An article about a DIY foaming face mask catches my attention while I’m listening with one ear to Hänsel’s ramblings.

I notice Hänsel stopped talking and walked over to the bar to talk to a woman who was sipping on her mimosa and I roll my eyes at him.

The chair that’s been occupied by Hänsel mere seconds ago is now seating a different person.

Nik Ryder himself. His blond hair was held back by gel and his blue eyes sparkling like the deep blue sea stare back at me.

He smirks and I put the magazine down on the wooden table.

“Funny meeting you here,“ he says and leans back in his chair, his legs stretched out and his leather jacket billowing behind him as if a soft breeze swirled it back.

I laugh.

“In New Orleans? What are the off chances of that? Hmm,“ I keep smiling.

He laughs.

“Bitch,“ he says.

“Jerk,“ I reply in turn and we both share a laugh.

He clasps my hand as a way of greeting me.

“It’s good to see you again,“ he smiles warmly.

“Likewise. I wish it was under different circumstances though,“ I say.

Meaning the missing person case that’s brought both me and Hänsel to New Orleans.

His smile dims.

“You and me both. As to the case, I don’t have much to tell you. Actually, make that nothing at all. I did grill the police but they don’t have anything. Or they don’t want to tell me. Which is worrisome,“ he says.

“I was afraid you’d say that,“ my shoulders sag. I was hoping he could dig up something.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t deliver better news,“ Nik smiles sadly at me.

He said just that when he was joined by a beautiful-looking woman.

Dressed from head to toe in black leather. Her dark wavy hair adorned her soft face. Her slightly darker skin tone is flawless. Her amber brown eyes glow as if from deep within.

She smiles at us and takes a sip of my drink.

“Good seeing you in one piece Gret,“ she says and her whiskey brown eyes sparkle.

I grin.

“You too Katie,“ I say because I can’t resist riling her up a bit.

She sighs and looks at Nik.

“See what you did? Now everyone calls me Katie. No one’s going to take me seriously with that name,“ she takes another sip.

I smile at her and say.

“We love you that’s why we call you Katie,“ I say.

She groans.

“Small children are called Katie. I’m a grown-ass woman,“ she says matter-of-factly.

Hänsel leans over her shoulder.

“A good-looking one at that,“ he says and she swats him away like a fly.

“And you just got more annoying,“ she says chuckling.

Hänsel gasps in shock.

“Pie-boy is getting roasted. I knew something was missing,“ Nik says grinning.

Hänsel cracks his knuckles.

“Bite me blondie,“ Hänsel says.

Niks grin widens and he just smiles at my brother.

“I’m afraid you’re not my type,“ he winks.

Katie looks between the guys and says.

“If you could stop your little pissing match. Maybe we could turn to more important matters?“ she says and pulls out a dark purple leather-bound notebook.

She’s jotting something down and I furrow my brow at her.

Nik notices my gaze and explains.

“Her way of keeping track of things,“ he says and I nod.

Katie looks up.

“This way I have everything I need. I don’t think I’m of much help regarding your case, but I can keep my ears to the ground. If I hear anything I’ll let you know,“ she says and closes her notebook, and puts it back in her bag. One I haven’t noticed before.

I sigh deeply.

“Why has the police not opened up an investigation? I mean it’s not just one person. We’re talking about at least a dozen people here. Don’t they think that’s suspicious?“ I ask around the table.

Both Nik and Katie share a long look. Silently communicating.

“What was that look?“ I point with my index finger between them.

Nik rubs his neck as if he’s embarrassed for some reason. A tinge of pink showed in his high-cheek bones.

“The police have a tight budget. When they learned about the disappearances they saw it was mostly homeless people. They didn’t think it was worth investigating. Spending money they don’t have on a case that’s probably going to lead nowhere? Yeah, not happening,“ he says with a frustrated gaze.

I’m about to get up when I feel Katherine’s hand on my own.

“I know how you feel. Trust me. We don’t like it any more than you do. However, just because the police can’t help, doesn’t mean we can’t. We can combine our strengths to solve this case,“ she says.

That’s when I remember Vera Reimonenq. Our mutual friend who has the Reimonenq touch. By touching someone with her bare hands, the basic outcome is death. She hasn’t learned to control her powers as her mother has. That’s also the reason why she wears gloves. At all times. You will never catch her without them.

Though Vera might have some ideas. She knows New Orleans better than anyone. Her family dates back generations. Vera’s great-great-grandfather, Derek Reimonenq murdered a coven of witches and their families, the witches in turn cursed the Reimonenqs. The curse prevents anyone in Vera’s family to touch anyone with their bare hands. Otherwise, the person they touch will die.

Vera’s mother who is also known as Lady Smoke is running the underworld. She’s got to know something.

That’s why I ask Nik and Katie.

“What about Vera?“

Nik already shakes his head.

“Vera and her mother are on some sort of trip. Looking for an artifact. No idea what though. They didn’t exactly provide us with any details,“ he says and shrugs.

I humm.

Katie looks intently at the door and whispers.

“There might be someone we could ask,“ she says.

“Who?“ I ask curiously.

Katie bites down on her lower lip.

“He’s known as The Shadow,“ she whispers.

Nik is shaking his head wildly at Katie.

“Are you crazy? He’s dangerous. It’s better to not get him involved,“ his lips pressed into a firm line.

Katie raises an eyebrow.

“What are our options?“ she asks and when Nik doesn’t reply she continues “Just because you butted heads a few times doesn’t mean he won’t be able to help us out,“ she says finishing off my drink.

“It’s still a no,“ Nik says.

Hänsel and I look between them.

“Sorry to interrupt your little love fest squabble but who are we talking about?“ I ask.

Katie turns to me with a serious look in her chestnut brown eyes.

“As I said. He’s called The Shadow…“ she doesn’t get to finish her sentence when someone loudly clears their throat.

We all look up and see Garrus. Who is pointing towards the back room of the bar with his head, indicating we should go to the back of the bar.

We all stand up and silently follow Garrus to the back of the bar.

When we’re safely inside Garrus loses the door and takes a look at each of us.

“You should be careful when you talk about him. He’s the most cunning supernatural I’ve ever met,“ he says.

Katie holds up her hands and stares at Garrus.

“Wait a minute. You guys met? When? And how come you didn’t say anything?“

Garrus sighs from deep within.

“Well, I swore an oath to not talk about it. This is as far as I can go,“ he admits. Fae love a good deal. Always making up their own little loopholes, that’s why you’ve got to be very careful when you make a deal with the Fae.

I hold up a hand.

“Well, Hänsel and I still don’t know who that is,“ I say more confused than ever.

Garrus’s ice-blue gaze holds my own hazel one.

“That’s because there’s not much to be known about him. He’s called The Shadow and he’s hard to find. But trust me when I say if he wants to find you? He will,“ he says.

Why does that excite me for some reason? Get your head out of the gutter Gretel. We’re here to solve a case and not get wild in the sheets with some Fae guy.

“Then let’s go find him. Hänsel you coming?“ I ask my brother.

Hänsel looks over at me and slowly retreats back to the door.

“Yeah. No. I know that look. I’m not helping you streak through the dark looking for trouble. That sounds like way too much work for my taste. And I’d rather spend some time with those nymph twins I saw earlier. I think I’m going to choose option number two and have some fun,“ he says.

“Seriously Hänsel? Can you for once in your life focus and think with your head and not with your dick?“

Everyone’s laughs turn into coughs when Hänsel gives them a look.

“You haven’t changed a bit pie-boy,“ Nik shakes with laughter.

Hänsel just looks at him.

“A) That’s really rude. B) That’s not true and C) Stop calling me pie boy,“ he says.

While Hänsel mutters to himself and walks out of the bar.

I sigh.

“I’m sorry about my brother. He’s usually not like that,“ I say to everyone else.

Nik turns serious.

“About The Shadow. He’s dangerous…“

I snort.

“As opposed to what? All the other supernaturals that are roaming the night?“

“He’s Fae. That of itself is dangerous,“ he quickly looks at Garrus.

“No offense man,“ he seems apologetic.

“It’s all good,“ Garrus replies.

“Does anyone else want to tag along?“ I ask around.

Katie and Nik both look at me and I know they won’t be able to help. I sigh.

“I wish I could but Nikki and I have a little project we’re working on. So we’ll be out of town for a few days,“ she says and Nik nods in agreement, but turns back and gives me a key.

“It’s the key to my place. You and Hänsel can crash there if you want,“ with those words he’s gone before I can even mutter a thank you. I smile to myself.

Now it’s just me and Garrus.

When the silence stretches on for too long I can see him giving me a long look before he wriggles his finger and tells me to follow him inside the bar.

I sit down on one of the bar stools and he begins wiping down the counter.

“Alright my little butterfly. What do you want to know?“ he asks and puts some dirty dishes into the sink.

“What do you know about that Fae?“ I ask leaning my elbows on the counter of the bar. I’m not sugarcoating things. Getting straight to business.

He dries a plate with a dish towel that was draped over his shoulder.

I lean closer to him to catch everything he has to say.

“I know his name is Grey. He and his little group of misfits collect from the highest bidder.“

I lean back and think about that for a few seconds.

“Doing what? Collecting artifacts? Sounds like the job of a bounty hunter to me,“ I look at him closely, but his face doesn’t reveal anything.

Garrus smiles at me.

“They collect anything and anyone. Making deals left and right. Anyone who’ll hire them, they’ll accept. The last thing I heard was they collected a rare gem. Made by Fae hands. I don’t know all the details. All I know is it’s pretty rare and priceless. Be careful when you go looking for him. You shouldn’t underestimate him,“ there’s a warning laced in his tone.

“I’ve dealt with worse,“ I say.

Garrus looks left and right. As if scared he would be overheard.

“That might be true rose petal. But you have never met a guy like him,“ he says done with cleaning and drying dishes.

I furrow my brow.

“Why is everyone so scared of him?“ I ask in wonderment.

“Because he moves like a shadow. You never see him coming. Others said that his beauty is out of this world. Making you do anything for him,“ he says pointedly.

“That sounds more like someone’s got a crush on him and hasn’t gotten laid in a while,“ I say.

He breaks out into laughter. After he recovered he hands me a shot glass. Shimmering with a blue opal-like liquid. It almost looks as if the liquid is swirling inside the shot glass.

“A little something on the house…“ he says.

I knock it back and smile at him while I leave the bar.

I’m almost out the door when his voice stops me.

“One other thing. Be careful little tulip,“ are his departing words.

I nod and then I’m out in the middle of the busy street. Right in the middle of the French Quarter.

The sun is slowly sinking and making way for the night. I’ve never liked the night. Daylight is my preferred time of day thank you very much.

The longer I walk the later it gets.

I’m walking through the French Quarter. Past busy bars that are open and bursting with partygoers.

All I encounter are drunken people and others looking for a hookup.

The deeper I move into the quieter parts of the city the less noise I hear. It’s as if all the noise from before got sucked out. The pale moonlight illuminated my way ahead. The soft taps of hooves moving past me on the cobblestones make me look to my right.

A white, open carriage is passing me by. An elderly couple is sitting and chatting animatedly inside.

The man manning the carriage taps his top hat slightly and smiles warmly at me as he moves past me. I smile and wave back at him.

A sudden gust of wind is blowing, making me shiver in my green leather coat. I walk by a dark alley, feeling as if my eyes are watching my every move.

Before I can even get my dagger out an arm jots out and grips me only to pin me against the brick wall in a nearby alley. The air leaves my body from the hard throw at the wall.

I look up and see a tall, hooded figure standing in front of me. Almost being one with the shadows.

“Why do you keep asking questions about me?“ he asks in a deep voice.

When I don’t answer he leans in closer.

”Stop following me!“ He says.

I try to break free of his grip. But it’s as if I was being held by steel. I can’t move an inch.

“I’m not following you. I’m looking for someone. You happened to be here,“ I retort.

He loses his grip and I can breathe a little easier again.

“Maybe the person you’re looking for doesn’t want to be found. Ever thought of that?“ he asks.

I’m trying to catch a glimpse of his face but he moves so fast through the shadows making it impossible to see anything.

“How do you know who I’m looking for? News flash you can’t order me around. So get out of my way,“ I say through gritted teeth.

He chuckles darkly. A chuckle that sends goosebumps all across my body.

“So we’re doing this the hard way. I really thought we could’ve avoided that,“ he says almost ruefully.

I try and slightly pull away his hood and see his pointy ears.His hair is as pale as moonlight.

He hisses under his breath and the next thing I know a purple haze is covering my eyes.

Then my whole world turns black and I’m out like a light.

#Strange Encounters #Chapter 2 #Nightbound AU vs. Hänsel & Gretel #Gretel van Andresen (F!OC)#Hänsel van Andresen (M!OC)#Grey #Nik Ryder #Garrus #Katherine #Nightbound #cfws

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fuckstories · 10 months

Text

The Pharaoh's Curse And The Genie's Blessing (RAP)

Now Shhhhh!

Lurk And Be Quiet As I Sing You A Song!!!

Let's Begin By Taking A Moment To Pray

To God Above, Our God, That We May Be Given His Peace In These Troubled Times

We Must Pause And Let This Wonderful Message Wash Over Us As We Remember That

There Are Some Things Worse Than A Plague!!!

Like A Rapper With No Talent!!!

That Is Something A Bitch Shouldn't Even Think About!

Oh Yea I'm Bitter!!!

But Let's Not Focus On Me!!!

Let's Talk About The Pharaoh's Curse!!!

The Pharaoh's Curse Came Upon Egypt In The Year 1303

And Killed Almost All The People Who Ever Lived There!

Including Those With "Z" Names

Except For Those People With "Z" Names Who Were Dead Already!!!

Well Folks I Told Y'all It Was Bad!!!

I Didn't Say It Was Good!!!

As If The Pharaoh's Curse Wasn't Enough, Then There Was A New Scarcity That Turned Out To Be A Blessing!

A New Scarcity Of Oranges!!!

In The Year 1303

An Old Man Was Working On An Orange Tree

When He Sucked In His Breath At A Buzzing Sound

That Caused Him To Sneeze So Hard That The Whole Orange Tree Swung Right Over Him And Hit One Of The Peers In The Face!!!

It Turned Out To Be The Greatest Scarcity Ever!!!

The Man With The Best Sneeze Went On To Have A Long and Successful Career

He Started Out By Selling Oranges in New York

Then He Had The Idea To Make Jellies!!!

And So He Did!!!

I Want You To Try And Picture All This In Your Head

Please Pay Attention Now!

Here's How It Is Gonna Work!!!

A Few Minutes From Now We Will Turn Off The Light!!!

And Put Some Cotton Balls Over Our Mouths!!!

Before We Begin We're Gonna Read Out Loud

An Amazing Tale That Will Rock You Like Nothing Before!

The Story About The Pharaoh, Who Got Turned To Stone And The Genie Who Showed Him The Way Out Of It!!!

Let Us Pray Again To God Above To Bless Us And Keep Us Safe As We Remember That

There Are Some Things Worse Than A Plague!!!!

Like A Rapper With A Terrible Voice!!!

Ya Heard Me Right!!!

So Listen Up People, All Is Calm... Now Begin!!!

Here It Is!! The Pharaoh's Curse!!!

My Dear Brothers and Sisters, Listen Carefully

While I Sing You A Story, I Will Never Forget What I Saw

What I Saw During the Time I Was In The Underworld

There Once Was a Pharaoh Whose Name I Can't Even Say Out Loud

Who Died In The Year 1303 And Left His Empire to Go Down There With the Other Dead Bodies!!!

I Did Too!!!

But First I'll Tell You The Part Where I Went Down Under, Which Is Called Hell!!!!

My Journey To Hades Started On Christmas Eve Day, The Same Day My Dad Was Turned into a Spider.

I Went to Church But Not Because I Believe in God

But Because I Love Going to Church.

I Think It Would Be Wonderful If We All Went to Church!!!

Because It's Always Nice To Sit Down With Everyone

But Back To The Pharaoh...

When We Got There

I Saw Many, MANY Other People

Lined Up In A Giant Circle

That Had to Go on Without Their Friends And Family

All Because They Killed Someone

Who Had A Name That Had A Z in It!

To Be More Specific They Killed Them With "Z" Names!!!!!

This Is A Long Story

But Let Me Stop Here and Bring The Pharaoh Into the Story!!!

I Got In Line Behind a Group of Girls Named Stephanie, Alexus, and Azalea

They Were Very Loud Because They Weren't All That Intelligent.

One of the Girls Screamed, "It's OK To Get Angry With God!"

Another Said, "I Am SO Angry!!!!"

And Another One Said, "I Hate That My Parents Named Me 'Alexus'!!!!"

Then Another Girl Screamed, "But I Don't Know What To Call My Daughter When She Gets Older!!!!"

I Thought About Saying That to the Girl With "Z" Names but I Wasn't Ready Yet to Be Annoying So Instead

I Put on My Cute Eyeglasses

That My Dad Sent Me From Germany

That Shaped Like A Dragon With Golden Wings

And Everyone Thought I was so Cool and Cute

Because I Was Different From Everybody Else.

The Pharaoh Looked Very Strange Down Under

He Had The Cutest Smile and Blue Eyes

And A Face that Will Never Look Bad in Photos!

The Pharaoh Was Waiting In Line

Along With All The Other Dead Bodies

Until He Got to the Top

Where He Found A Dead Fish Eating Another Dead Fish

The Pharaoh Stopped Eating and said, "Excuse me... You are eating another dead fish?"

The Dead Fish Said, "No... I'm Eating a Living Fish."

The Pharaoh Said, "OK Then, You Can Have It"

So the Pharaoh Touched His Sword, And Swallowed The Living Fish

Then He Looked Around for Something He Could Eat

He Saw A Worm, Which was Also Very, Very Dead

But When The Pharaoh Touched it It Turned Into a Boy Who Said, "Hi! My Name Is Pete!"

Pete Was A Little Creepy Looking Because he Had No Eyebrows Or Nose Hair

Or Ears On Both Sides Of His Head

But That Didn't Stop Him From Being Friendly!!!

Pete Was A Good Boy!!!

And he Talked and talked about God For So Long...

The Pharaoh Thought The More Talking the Better

Because He Would Never Run Out of Things To Say!!!!

The Pharaoh Thought, "God Is Great"!!!

The Pharaoh Thought, "I Wish I Was God So I Can Keep Talking To People for Free."

The Pharaoh Thought, "God Is Good."

But after the Pharaoh Stopped Thinking and Said "I Want to Be God"

Another Worm Came Along

And When He Touched It

It Turned into A Girl Named Patrice.

Patrice Was Pretty Cool but the Pharaoh Wanted More!!

Patrice Talked for Hours

About The Bible

God's Son

And How There Is Only One True God

Who Created Everything in Existence!!!

But when Patrice Finished Talking

Another Worm Came And Turned Into a Boy Named Jason, Who Had His Parents' Name

Which Made It Really Weird!!!!

Jason Talked for Days and Days and Days and Days

And Eventually He Turned into God, The Creator of All Things!

God Told the Pharaoh that He was God and Had Seen The Pharaoh in Line

He Said, "You Will Rule over All the Dead Bodies."

The Pharaoh Did NOT Think This Was True!!!

But God Was God

And The Pharaoh Didn't Want To Upset Him!!!

So the Pharaoh Wore the Crown of a Ruler over His Head

And Started Chanting Names of Gods in a Long, Long, LONG Song

He Said Names Over and Over and Over and Over and Over...

The Pharaoh Singed...

"God is Great

God is Good

I Am Not God

I Will Eat God"

He Shouted it

Over And Over Again

Until His Voice Cracked!

He Couldn't Make the Voices Go Away So he Shouted The Last Thing he Could Think Of!!

"God Is Bad

I Am A Good Person

I Do Good Things for the Good of Others!!!"

He Turned To God, Who Was Standing Right There In Front Of him, and Took His Finger And Pressed God's Nose.

God's Nose Blew Water

And He Sprayed All Over The Pharaoh!!!!!!!

The Pharaoh Woke Up, Completely Wet

He Washed Himself with The Water from the Fountain

And Then Looked Outside to See Where The Rain Came From

But It Wasn't a Raindrop... It Was the Face of God Looking At the Pharaoh

In This Moment God Gave The Pharaoh a Gift:

A Magic Staff of Light

So That The Pharaoh Could Never Be Put On a Pedestal

Because All Good People Are Like Everybody Else!!!"

It Happens Every Year...

The Moon Rises Over A Different Place...

All the Pretty Flowers are Cut

Everybody Eats a Very Strange Fish, Including The Pharaoh...

The Pharaoh Wears a Crown over his Head

That Makes Him Never Feel Pain.

He Shouts out "I Am God!!"

Then God Punches the Pharaoh in the Face and makes him Swallow A Living Fish, That He's Actually Eating the Worm...

This is All a Dream...

All I See Is the Moon Over Egypt...

I Can See Everything Happening Here

Even though I'm Thousands of Miles Away from my Home Town

"Alleluia"!!!

God Save The Pharaoh!!!

(from my memory)

Thank You To My Fans For Your Patience Over These Last Few Months. I Know You Were All Waiting To Hear A New Song From Me. The Great News Is That My Song, "The Pharaoh's Curse And The Genie's Blessing", Finally Came Out This Week! (I know it took a little while, but that just shows you how special this song is!) You'll Be Amazed At How Powerful This Song Is!

I Think You'll All Agree That This Song Is More Than A Little Bit Bizarre!!! I Am A True Professional Who Always Delivers The Best Possible Music I Can But There Are Still Times When The Music Makes The Music! This Is One Of Those Songs! Please Be Sure To Give This Song An Honest Chance, If It Doesn't Hit Home for You Right Away You May Still Find Something That Resonates! In Fact, If You Would Please Share This Song With Your Friends, I'm Pretty Sure Many People Will Find Themselves Feeling It Deeply By The End!

That's the Kind of Song This Is Folks! I Hope You're As Excited As I Am!!!

If Not I'm Sorry This Was The Song I Had To Bring To You!

That's All Folks!

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mccoys-killer-queen · 1 year

Text

Seeing Dokken/Lynch Mob/Ted Poley (Danger Danger) in concert

this was just at my normal go-to venue 50 minutes away

I was VERY PREPARED THIS TIME and bought a chair, blanket, hat, gloves, scarf, wore 2 pairs of pants, and my GOOD JACKET

yes this meant ppl were judging me I JUST HATE THE COLD OK

i made line friends again this time we're gonna call them Dan and Barry and they're Elder Metalheads and told stories about protecting their wives and other children at shows

Ted Poley granted me a photo pass but no one from his management gave a fuck and didn't tell the venue so I didn't get a pass :( he's such a sweet guy tho

so this guy I was hanging out with at the Sonic Slam show last summer turned out to be my one insta friend's COUSIN LOL so the two of them plus his mom got me up at the barrier LMAOO it pays off to make friends in line

I was extremely disappointed in the merch. there were literally 3 (three) shirts to choose from. That was it. Plus you could buy a CD if u wanted. They also weren't taking card. Fuck that. I bought a double vodka cranberry instead.

due to personal reasons I think I gotta stan Danger Danger now

literally I never heard a single song by them until a week ago but Ted is just so nice and fun and he put on a hell of a 30 minute show

he also threw balloons into the crowd that we had to blow up ourselves it was hilarious

there was also this little kid next to me the entire time and Ted threw him a balloon but he didn't catch it so he knelt down in front of this kid and threw like ALL the balloons at him it was so sweet ;-;

just wanna say for the record that I was there for like at least 8 core memory moments for that child last night and that balloon story was one of them

for Don't Walk Away, Ted came into the crowd bc he said 'it looks like you're having so much fun out there, I'm gonna join you!' and i couldn't find him like the entire time eoirngwoergnwerg

he also spit like a ton of times over his head and idk what it is about concert but it always makes me want men to spit on me

honestly Ted's set was the height of the show

Lynch Mob was really good and their singer... 👁👄👁

he's got crazy eyes, he's got long curly dark brown hair, and he's a petite little bitch

he also looks like Derek Day from Classless Act and Rami Malek's lovechild

his pants were TOOOOOOO LOWW 👁👄👁👁👄👁👁👄👁 i could see pubes 👁👄👁

watching George Lynch play is an otherworldly experience

at the end of their set, their drummer threw his drumsticks into the crowd and the little boy next to me caught one and everyone around him EXPLODED with joy (another core memory moment)

at one point their bassist threw his pick and I ended up getting it off the floor and giving it to this boy too

his mom thanked me secretly rogwrgtpmrtg

idk why everyone says Don Dokken can still sing I'm sorry but he can't he's worse than Vince Neil like he was literally monotone the entire time I was disappointed

despite that we were still bangin and goin nuts

Don did smile at me 3 times tho and wave at me ;-;

his stories were funny too trpptprptg like he said in Germany they eat french fries with mayo and that's the only thing he knew out to say in german in the early 80s and it's all he would eat bc of that

also he kept gushing about the crowd and the venue and how much he loves Penn's Peak and the crowd is always wild and how the venue is in the middle of nowhere (which is very correct)

there was also a red flag where Don introduced Dream Warriors with how big Patricia Arquette's boobs were when she was 16 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩 🚩

also based on everything I've heard from Ted, Dokken and their team don't sound like very nice people erogneorgtgpptt

I wanted to meet Ted afterwards but I didn't wanna push it ;-; he emailed me today offering me a pass at his show in NJ on Friday but I declined bc 1- I would have to leave straight from work 2- I would have to drive through Philadelphia 3- how is he sure they'll actually listen to him this time and 4- it's over 100 miles away so I'd have to invest in so much gas :( sorry Ted i want to but it's it's just not gonna be worth it

#tbh i think everyone likes shitting on vince bc of fatphobia #like vince isn't good either but at least he wasn't monotone and can hit SOME high notes #concert #concerts #concert log #dokken #lynch mob #ted poley #danger danger #should also point out i slept for 8 hours after i got home then took a 4 hour nap today

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besidesitstoowarm · 6 months

Text

"Journey's End" thoughts

doctor you suck shit

okay again i'm gonna blow through the plot stuff bc i don't care it's not the part that matters. the doctor avoids regeneration by channeling the energy into his hand. mickey and jackie are here now! martha goes to germany and the daleks are speaking german lmfao. the daleks have an instrument called the crucible and taught the doctor by dropped the tardis into an incinerator...

bitch you THOUGHT!!! the hand is calling out to donna and she touches it and gets slammed w regen energy and then the hand grows into naked david tennant. tentoo has arrived! a dalek shoots jack but he's fine. we learn tentoo has one heart bc he's half human! his singular heartbeat "rippled back" which is what donna was hearing that drew her to the hand and he says "we were always heading for this" HAVE I NOT BEEN SAYING?? THIS WAS ALWAYS GOING TO HAPPEN SHE'S BEEN DEAD SINCE THE BEGINNING

martha tries to use the world-exploding key and gets teleported to the dalek ship and they explain they made a "reality bomb" using the aligned planets as a scope. like the planets aligning in hercules to release the titans. davros gets on his bullshit "you take ordinary people and you turn them into weapons" he's not wrong actually. the doctor does very much do that. "always running and never looking back because you dare not, out of shame" again got it in one

donna's powers activate bc she got turned part time lord by the regen energy! regenergy. sure. she's the doctordonna and ten remembers the ood foretold such. always listen to the ood. so now there's three doctors! jack says "i can't tell you what i'm thinking right now" bc he's narsty. dalek caan has betrayed the daleks by letting all this shit happen "i saw what we did, creator, and i said no more". tentoo explodes every dalek. i'm fine with that who cares

k9 is here! everyone teams up to drag the earth back home to its proper place. the tardis is functioning appropriately bc it finally has enough drivers and it's sweet to see everyone get along. rose, jackie, and tentoo get dropped off in their parallel universe bc she needs to babysit him?? "he's me, when we first met" so she gets a project man. i'm glad rose gets her very own tenth doctor to fuck but this is kind of a copout ending for her sorry. that said "how was that sentence going to end" "does it need saying?" and then tentoo DOES finish it and kisskiss. good for her genuinely

everyone else goes back home and donna starts glitching out bc a time lord brain can't live in a human body and it's going to kill her. he takes all her memories, wipes her brain, as she's crying and begging him not to. it's hard to watch, it's very violating, and it's a bullshit copout for her too. i know rtd has said he does not like the way the episode ended but honestly couldn't untangle the knot in a satisfying way and i do get that, there were a LOT of pieces in play. still bullshit to me tho

he drops her at home and warns wilf and sylvia that they can't ever tell her the truth or it'll kill her. he gets wet in the rain pathetically and the episode is over. as i said last time, this story makes no fucking sense but the fanservice really does work for me and everyone is so charming, all the pieces falling into place from the season-long foreshadowing, it really is a great story. not my fave finale, i'm too much of a sucker for s3, but i think it was probably the best possible way to get all these characters involved in a way that felt natural for them and useful for the story

up next i'll do a series retrospective! i'll probably let the specials sit as their own mini-series and do another after the regeneration. farewell for now to donna noble

#doctor who #besides its too rewatch #dw s4 #Journey's End

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judaswail · 1 year

Note

AHH i had half a giant response post written out to ur reply to my ask about måneskin and then tumblr deleted it so im just gonna ramble back @ u:

absolutely Crazy details about their manager leaving and album timelines and all that, like it was evident that something changed between esc & rush and that makes total sense. i agree that the Cool Sexy Italian thing is great for marketing and an occasional song, but it’s so fucking tiresome for a whole album and it’s just. disappointing?

i don’t speak italian (aside from when i lived with an italian briefly in germany and he tried teaching me that ‘cazzo’ means ‘hello’ lmao) but even just reading translated lyrics it’s like damiano. what happened. i remember him saying in an interview that writing in english is easier bc they don’t give a shit if it’s cringe, and boy does that come through on rush…

anyway i had more coherent points in the vanished post but yeah, vol. 2 might be a pipe dream but some part of me will always be waiting :’) gonna go watch that video to cleanse, thank u

hey man sorry for taking so long to answer 😭😭 my bitch ass caught covid so if this comes out as pointless rambling that's why😃👍 anyway again, i fully agree with you and my god he did NOT have to tell on himself so bad with that comment lmao. yeah we can tell no thought goes into your english lyrics thanks for not trying ig 💀 btw ever since your last ask i went and listened to bla bla bla and read your diary so you can imagine the kind of state that i am in. mark chapman is the song i've been digging the most, i think, but nothing beats listening to vent'anni at night and bawling your eyes out (can you tell it's my favourite song off that album lol). so yeah we WILL be waiting for what we are due, keep the faith brother 😤 oh and good afternoon in italian is "porca puttana" you should try it out :)

#asks

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berryunho · 1 year

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pls i typed that ask at like 4am after the show i’m so surprised i got that many details bc half of the show feels like a blackout i literally ??? have videos of wooyoung that i don’t remember taking so when watching those i was like ah. wooyoung bias indeed i love him <3 AND LISTEN I GET WHAT UR SAYING but the loyal lifestyle just. isn’t for me. i’m loyal to atz only (not even) bc hj would k word me for LoOkInG aT oThEr OpPaS but. wooyoung. is a menace. he deserves the slander sometimes /lh

AND ! no one gets me the way san does bc WOOYOUNG’s hair is black when i wanted oreo but san did everything my delusional little brain manifested (aka wear the outfits i wanted him to) like ?? there is no way there won’t be an era of me having san as my bias </3 like listen.. i don’t wanna be delulu and stuff.. even tho i might be a little.. but a while ago i said i wanted san to wear sage green for a layout that i never even made.. n literally the next day he was on the radio or something wearing a green cardigan.. tell me he’s not meant to be my bias u literally can’t

also when i first started stanning atz it was wooyoung who pulled me in !! and weirdly i stayed loyal for a LONG time even when hongruella looked THAT fine during the last tour (literally. saw hongruella in the flesh on my bday. imagine. how did i stay loyal) but i always thought it was a bit weird?? bc i usually gravitate towards the introverts for literally any group/artist (tho i.. only stan atz rn.. oop hongjoong u better jot this down rn i am the most loyal atiny ever/j) so i thought it was a little bit out of order for me to like and stay loyal to THE extroverted social butterfly.. but then my bias line was completed with both infps aka my mbti.. and it suddenly made sense dhsjsh i just ! gravitate towards san a lil now AND ESPECIALLY AFTER THIS CONCERT he’s truly one of my fav comfort ppl like.. he said something and immediately after i was like WRITE THAT DOWN!!! and opened my notes app to write it down LMAO my friend was like wtf are u doing and i was like uh. comfort words??

last thing before i nap… san shyly dancing to cyberpunk for us again during the concert.. take my heart RN sir it’s literally! urs ! and thanks hwa for making that happen i died a lil

anyway i’m good and i hope you’re good as well <3 mwah mwah -san anon

HI !!!!

4am !!!!??$))(# wow you were quite coherent for 4am im also surprised LOL BUT THATS SO FAIR I GET IT ADJKFLASKJF its inevitable to jump around when you're a kpop stan like when 8 lovable men are presented to you .... why have only one bitch when you can have five ! KJLFDKSJAFSLJKDF

PLS THE MANIFESTING AKLDFJSKDFJ i love it i am a huge fan of being delulu i think life is too boring if you dont let yourself have a little joke around every once in a while AND BELIEVING THAT COINCIDENCES ARE MANIFESTATIONS.... IM HERE FOR IT !!!

eheheh i enjoy learning this lore about you san anon... i agree you are very strong for being loyal despite hongruella on your bday like .... thats crazy .... like i got my american ass on an airplane and flew to germany last may to see hongruella in the flesh .... in a completely loyal to yunho way of course ! JAKDJFSDFLJK BUT omg that actually is pretty interesting !!! id say yunho very much falls in line w my usual bias "type" lol but its funny bc that Type is just. the Opposite Of Me. BUT ANYWAYS hehe i get it ! all of them are just so ... <333 and literally why have i never thought of busting the notes app out that's actually so smart oh em gee ....

but ehehe san is so funny like how are we gonna be shy sir !!! after everything !!! hehe i hope your nap was good <3 im quite good ehehe a little bit nervous ........ but overall good hehe anything else exciting going on in your life san anon? hehe mwahhhh

#san anon #answered

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paradisetemporarilymisplaced · 3 years

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So I was being a basic bitch the other day and listening to my true crime podcasts when it occurred to me just how suspicious Nile’s “death” would look to everyone not in the Guard, leading me to a train of thought that, 2200 words later, absolutely got away from me but I can’t let go so I’m inflicting it on all of you!

To set the stage, we know the movie takes place over approximately a week. Here’s what happens to Nile from the military’s point of view:

She dies is very seriously injured

She heals without a scratch

Just before she’s supposed to be shipped out to Germany, she vanishes, leaving two men concussed (and presumably reporting being knocked out by a woman with short hair wearing civilian clothes)

She goes AWOL for several days

They get word from the CIA that she is to be reported killed in action (details unclear)

So, at the beginning of this very weird week, the USMC has to tell Nile’s family of her death critical injury. What her family was told depends on how long she was dead – a Google search tells me that family will be notified in person within 8 hours of a soldier’s death, but we don’t know how long her first death lasted. For an injury, however, they’d get a phone call to notify them and the unit would arrange for them to visit as soon as the soldier is transferred out of a combat zone. Like I remember when I was in high school, a guy from my church who was a Marine was really seriously injured in a helicopter crash in Iraq and from what I could tell, his parents were told immediately and were flown out to Germany to see him, so it stands to reason that Nile’s family would have been informed relatively quickly after her throat was slashed, one way or another.

And then, she goes AWOL. Her family would be notified while the USMC tried to figure out where she went, not least because the military would want to know if she’s contacted them. (And it’s possible that her family may have been on the way to Germany to see her since we know that’s where she was supposed to go!) So for several days:

Nile’s mom and brother have no idea where she is

They know she was seriously injured and most certainly should not have been moving around on her own

They can’t get a hold of her

The military can’t tell them anything

And the next thing they know for sure is that she was “killed in action.” After being injured and vanishing into thin air. And they presumably cannot produce her body or any concrete evidence of her death. In any case, something sketchy is going on, so they’re like. SMELLS LIKE A MILITARY COVERUP.

In a surprise to probably no one, there is a well-documented legacy of mysterious US military deaths, particularly of women of color (TW for sexual assault in these links). The cases of LaVena Johnson and Vanessa Guillenin particular have made national news because of their families’ persistence in seeking justice. Likewise, Nile is a Black woman, and her mom and brother are most certainly hypercognizant of (a) state violence against Black people and (b) these high-profile cases of suspicious military deaths. So her family are seriously side-eyeing the situation, knowing that (a) the military has a serious incentive (and a documented history) of covering up things that make them look bad and (b) nothing about Nile’s disappearance and supposed death are adding up.

And Andy’s right. Nile does come from warriors. And you know who else does? Her brother.

Don’t get me wrong. Nile’s mom would absolutely not back down. She’d know something was up and want to get to the bottom of it. But based on what I know about Gen X parents (mine), they’re not the most technologically savvy. Like they can use the internet, but they didn’t grow up with it the way we young millennials and Gen Z did. So Nile’s brother takes the lead. And what do zillennials do best?

Social media.

Nile’s brother starts going hard on any site he can, trying to get the word out to see if anyone knows what happened to his sister. He starts a Reddit thread. He starts a Facebook group. He reaches out to the media and true crime bloggers and podcasters à la Sarah Turney, getting loud and being a general nuisance in hopes of getting some answers. He gets his friends and Nile’s friends involved. Maybe eventually Dizzy, Jay, and others from Nile’s unit hear about it and reach out, telling him what they saw and how weird it all was. He’s drumming up interest, and soon “Nile Freeman” becomes a household name (at least among the true crime fans).

Copley is, of course, trying his best, but at this point there is just so much that it’s impossible for him to scrub everything. Sure, he can erase new footage of Nile and the Guard, but what can he do about Reddit threads and podcast episodes that are speculating something weird has happened? Maybe he could hack the sites and shut those things down, but honestly, that’s the last thing he’d want to do, because that only adds weight to the theory that Nile’s disappearance is a military coverup. So eventually he has to tell Andy what’s going on.

Andy, obviously, does not take the news well. However, she is also completely computer illiterate, because that’s Booker’s job and he’s the only one who ever bothered to learn what the internet is in any meaningful way. (She probably calls Booker for advice, and for the record, I think Booker would have no qualms about shutting down conspiracy threads, tinhats be damned, but Copley is too concerned about the consequences. He’s ex-CIA for crying out loud, he knows how it’ll look if they scrub every mention of Nile’s name from the internet.) Maybe she confers with Joe and Nicky but, let’s be honest, they’d be equally unhelpful. So at this point, she knows they have to bring in Nile.

But the thing about Nile is that she, too, knows how to use the internet (duh). Aside from her being a young millennial/digital native, we know from the cave scene where she’s giving Booker suggestions on how to track Copley that she clearly is even more computer savvy than the average person. And for that reason she almost definitely took over the day-to-day tech stuff after Booker’s exile. So I think it would be foolish to expect her to be unaware of what’s happening. She’s not contacting her family or posting on the message boards or anything, but she knows what’s up. So Copley and the team probably sit her down to “break the news,” but we know the girl does not have a poker face (see: literally shooting herself in the foot and not being able to play it cool whatsoever) and cracks immediately, telling them she’s seen everything about her case – she’s not interacting with any of it, she certainly didn’t instigate anything, but she knows. (And she is so goddamn proud of her brother.)

At this point, I’d like to pause and consider Nile’s role in the overall narrative of this movie. She’s set up as a foil to Andy, obviously, but she’s also a foil to Booker. Booker, who, like Andy, is a serious pessimist, but who, unlike Andy, still has very fresh memories and trauma associated with being the new kid, which have destroyed him. In his mind (and Andy’s), if Nile communicates with her family, she’ll become just like him in a century or two – bitter, alone, and stuck with her grief and memories of watching her family die and knowing they died resenting her. It’s a small sample size, but this is the only experience they have to go off of.

But it doesn’t have to be like that.

There’s been a lot of discussion of TOG being a fundamentally queer movie – a group of people brought together because of something inherent about themselves that is different, that must be hidden, that causes others to hate, fear, and reject them. Booker’s backstory is the archetypal traumatic “coming out” story – his family learns who he is, hate him for it, and attempt to cast him out of their lives. He’s stuck with his trauma, his pain, his loss, and it consumes him.

But what if Nile’s family would be the opposite? What if her “coming out” to them as immortal is met with acceptance, love, celebration? What if her family is just overjoyed to have her back, and they don’t care what the circumstances are? I'm reminded of this incredible post from @shitty-old-guard-deaths a while back, where Nile’s mother hits Booker with a frying pan because “my baby let me believe she was dead for FIVE YEARS based on your bad advice???” (which may or may not have inspired this whole tangent). Nile takes the advice of someone who did the same thing she wants to do because she doesn’t want to risk her family’s rejection. She wants the good memories with her family and is afraid that showing them her true self will bring her unbearable pain, forever replacing those memories. But, with high risk comes high reward.

Anyway. Nile and the team are trying to come up with a plan for how to handle this whole thing, but she’s not really participating because she’s too afraid to hope. Until finally, quickly, so she doesn’t lose her nerve, she suggests she reach out to them, knowing that, realistically, that’s the only solution before things snowball even further out of control. The team is shocked, but realize that she has a point. They decide that Copley should actually be the first point of contact, posing as a US government official to talk with them and test the waters.

So Copley goes to Nile’s family’s house to talk with her mom and brother. They’re probably distrustful and apprehensive, but nonetheless secretly ecstatic that their work has paid off. They talk and review all of the information that they’ve collected, including testimonials from the people on Nile’s base and recent sightings (along with photos) of Nile (with the same three people) over the last few years that people have sent them but they haven’t posted publicly. At this point, Copley’s like, yeah this is about to blow up, we gotta put our cards on the table. He convinces them to come with him to some safe house/black site/whatever he can get that is technologically impenetrable (I’m picturing them in like, an interrogation room at a police station kind of deal), takes their phones, locks the doors, and brings in Nile.

What follows is the most delightful reunion scene of all time, bringing Joe, Nicky, and even Andy to tears as they watch and listen from outside the room. With Copley’s help, Nile tells her mom and brother about her immortality and what’s been going on since she died (within reason, of course), and they are thrilled. They don’t understand why (because no one does) but they don’t question it and they see it as a gift from God – she’s been resurrected, she will live, and she has a purpose. Her mother and brother are so happy to see her again and are willing to agree with pretty much anything to stay in her life as long as they can.

So. They set up some complicated agreement (they bring in the other three for support/intimidation as needed) setting the terms of their relationship. They swear Nile’s family to secrecy, maybe bringing up the lab to show how high the stakes are, and they readily agree. They come up with some cover story for Nile’s brother to share on the message boards (maybe that the government has opened an investigation but because it’s an open case he has to shut it all down? Tells people to direct their tips somewhere else? Something to that effect). There’s still speculation, of course, but without Nile’s brother at the helm providing the energy, the hype dies down as news stories are wont to do without any movement. And Nile’s family goes to work for the team. The experience has taught them that Copley can’t possibly do everything himself, especially when it comes to social media, so Nile’s brother takes the lead on the day-to-day tracking/social media while Copley and her mom focus on finding jobs and scrubbing their traces afterward.

So there you have it: Nile gets to integrate her biological family into her found family and spend the rest of their lives with them as it should be, Copley gets some badly needed help managing the reality of social media, the team finally has a positive narrative surrounding outsiders Knowing About Them AND about interacting with people from their previous life, and the audience gets the happy ending to this very lovely and very queer story to counteract the pain associated with Booker’s family.

Plus, you know, I’m a sucker for both a good government conspiracy theory and for Nile getting every good thing she deserves.

#the old guard #tog #tog fanfiction #tog meta #immortal family #nile freeman #mine #damn look at me contributing to a fandom! that’s new #pls reblog if you like this my self esteem could really use it #I just love nile so much and I’m being the nile-centric content I want to see in the world #it is just genuinely nuts to think abt how this situation would be perceived by anyone outside the narrative #she just mysteriously heals from a fatal injury and then VANISHES!!! this should be national fuckin news #also I do think there’s a major hole in the story when you think abt social media #like the only time it’s even hinted at is right at the very beginning when Andy erases that girl’s selfie #and the concept of fuckin Reddit is not even brought up despite Copley’s stalker board being analog Reddit #there’s just a lot of places one could go with this which is very much what we got here #1k

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