#God I miss being able to use a menstrual cup

[thesaltyace]

You ever decide to branch out and try a new brand of something, and immediately regret it?

I tried a new brand of menstrual pads because they were out of the kind I usually get.

I should have just gone to a different store.

Never again.

Now I'm headed out on fucking Black Friday to buy the Always brand I should have bought in the first place because they do not leak. 🙃

[bluesfortheredj]

You hadn’t felt right all morning and you probably should have called in sick if truth be told, but you were drinking plenty of water and it seemed to ease your dizziness a little so you assumed it would be fine if you kept yourself hydrated. Plus you definitely didn’t want to miss out on your big scene with Ben today, and he was as excited as you were. You’d been a couple for while, before you both got parts on the film, and you were excited to work alongside him for the first and probably only time.

“Here she is,” Ben grins when he sees you walking towards him in full costume.

“Here I am,” you laugh as you swish your long 70s style dress from side to side, “what do you think?”

“I think I’m punching above my weight here,” he winks, then bites his bottom lip lightly so only you can see.

You laugh at his response and he wraps his arms around your waist as he steps towards you, bringing you into a very tight embrace which almost knocks the air out of your lungs completely. Your head spins as he releases you slowly and your fingers tighten around his upper arms as your brain feels as if it’s moving around in circles.

“Are you alright?” Ben asks with concern as he watches your eyes struggle to focus on him.

“I just need some water,” you reply, looking down at the ground to try and stop your head from spinning.

“Water, can someone get some water please?” Ben asks as he looks around at the crew desperately while he holds you up.

Someone quickly comes running along with a bottle of water and you chug the whole thing within a matter of minutes as Ben watches you with a face full of worry.

“That’s better, I’m fine now, much better,” you smile unconvincingly.

“How long have you been feeling like this?” he questions.

“Just since this morning, it’s no big deal, just a bit dizzy, maybe a little faint, but it eases off when I drink some water so I must just be a little dehydrated,” you shrug casually.

“Hmm,” Ben frowns, “I don’t think-”

“I’m fine,” you insist.

You weren’t, and Ben knew it, but you wanted to carry on and try to get this scene filmed when it was meant to be, rather than having to get everything rearranged just because you felt a little under the weather. Ben moves away from you to grab another bottle of water for you then pushes it gently against your stomach with an unimpressed expression at the fact you were over exerting yourself when you clearly shouldn’t be, and you roll your eyes as you drink it before everyone gets into position on set.

Ben takes your hand as you stand side by side ready to make your entrance when the cameras start to roll and he leans over to give you a quick peck on the cheek before the scene starts; it had sort of become his thing during this time you had together, every time you were to be in a scene together he’d make sure he gave you a kiss just before you began, and it was something you’d never tire of. You shoot him a warm smile at his gesture then the scene begins and you make your entrance into the space that was meant to be part of a recording studio.

“Come here,” Ben grins as he sits down on the couch and pulls you onto his lap.

“Roger!” you giggle, just about remembering not to say Ben instead.

He slides you onto the cushion next to him as ‘the band’ turn around to look at you both from the mixing desk, then he gets up as you sort your dress out and sit up properly while you watch them all gather to hear some playback of what was recorded earlier. The scene ends soon after and Ben’s eyes travel over to you where you sit as still as possible on the sofa, fearing another episode if you moved to stand up without help.

“Are you going to be able to do the next scene?” he asks as he perches on the cushion next to you.

“Of course! You think something like this is going to put me off from kissing my man on camera?” you smirk.

It was a pretty simple task; kiss Ben while he pushes you against a door and opens it for you both to fall through. You’d done it many, many times at home naturally, so this should not be a problem for you at all, and you weren’t going to let anything stop you from filming this part.

“I’m worried about you...”

“Don’t be!” you chuckle as you cup his face gently, “I’m fine. Why are you so worried?”

“Because...” he exhales, lifting his face from your soft touch, “because I couldn’t stand the thought of anything bad happening to you. This isn’t just… This is real, I love you.”

Your hands drop to your lap in shock at the fact that he’d just used the word love for the first time and your eyes widen as your mouth falls open while you try to think of something to say. His face drops as you take your time in replying and your mind finally catches up with the situation which results in you almost shouting it back at him.

“Oh my god, I didn’t mean to be so loud. My brain was in shock I think. I love you too Ben,” you smile, his face now lifted at your reaction.

“You can shout it if you want,” he shrugs, “I don’t mind who knows.”

“One question, why now?” you ask, “I mean, I love you, but you are dressed as a young Roger Taylor right this moment and it’s a little weird.”

He looks down at himself as if he didn’t even realise, then he meets your gaze with a slightly bemused expression.

“I… I totally forgot,” he frowns, “fucking hell. I’ve been waiting to say this for ages and now I’ve said it as someone else.”

“It’s absolutely fine, but I will definitely remember this as Roger Taylor telling me he loves me,” you tease.

“Oh, don’t!” he cringes as he holds his head in his hands in embarrassment.

“Honestly Rog, it’s absolutely fine,” you giggle.

“Please don’t tell anyone this is how I first said it,” he laughs, “please!”

“I’ll try not to, but this is too good not to share with my parents at least.”

“I’ll say it again as soon as I’m out of all this,” he says, gesturing to his outfit and long blonde wig.

“I’m holding you to that, Taylor… I mean, Jones… Or is it Hardy?” you wink.

“You are in for a-”

“Right, you both ready for the next scene?” the producer asks as he appears beside you both.

“Yeah, yeah all set,” Ben nods, getting up and offering you his hand.

You get to your feet without your head spinning or feeling as if you were about to pass out, but as you go to take a step you have a wobble and end up pressed against Ben’s chest as he clings onto you to stop you from falling to the ground.

“What were you saying a moment ago about being alright?” he asks with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh shut up Roger,” you retort, “come on, we’ve got some kissing to do… Such a chore!”

“You really should at least get checked out by one of the team...”

“Listen, if I end up on the floor then please feel free to call someone over to make sure I’m okay, but otherwise I’ll be fine.”

You take a step away from him and that’s it for you; lights out. The next thing you know you’re waking up on the floor with a couple of paramedics hovering over you, and a very concerned looking Ben along with the others who are comforting him.

“Oh shit,” you mutter.

“(Y/N)!” Ben calls out after hearing your mumble.

“Alright, Rog?” you manage to joke with a half smile.

He looks at you sternly with a deep frown creasing his brow and you realise he was most definitely not in the mood to be messing around right now, so you whisper a very quick apology and assure him you’re taking this all very seriously.

“Is she okay?” he asks, looking up at the paramedics for an answer as they pack away their equipment.

“She’s fine,” one of them smiles, “just a little pre-menstrual drop in blood pressure, nothing to worry about.”

Your face flushes a little as the other guys hear the prognosis as well, and you turn away from everyone as you carefully get to your feet.

“Fuck’s sake,” you whisper as you dust yourself off and fiddle around with your dress.

“It’s okay,��� Ben reassures, “they’re all half deaf anyway.”

He presses his forehead against the side of your head as he holds onto you, then you hear those enchanting words once more.

“I love you.”

can you do some ben x reader on set of bo rhap please?

@peachllobotomy @lv7867 @aynsleywalker @pink-lemo @painthatiusedto @itisjustmethistime @mamaskillerqueen @queenslandlover-93 @tenement-funstah @rogmeddows

[buffysresources-archive]

╰    ♡    *    SENTENCE  STARTERS    ─     HEATHERS    !

feel  free  to  change  pronouns  if  /  where  needed  .    trigger  warnings  for  some  nsfw  stuff  ,  death  ,  suicide  ,  etc  .

‘  (   name  )  told me she teaches people real life  .  ’ ‘  real life sucks losers dry  .  ’ ‘  if you want to fuck with the eagles  ,  you have to learn to fly  .  ’ ‘  so you teach people how to spread their wings  &  fly  ?  ’ ‘  you’re beautiful  .  ’ ‘  what is your damage  ?  ’ ‘  i need you to forge a hot  &  horny  ,  but realistically low key note  .  ’ ‘  you don’t have anything for her either  .  ’ ‘  come on  ,  it’ll be very  .  ’ ‘  the note’ll give her shower nozzle masturbation material for weeks  .  ’ ‘  i’ll think about it  .  ’ ‘  don’t think  .  ’ ‘  pilgrims  ,  indians  ,  tater - tots  .  it’s a real party continent  .  ’ ‘  i think i’d probably miss my own birthday for a date  .  ’ ‘  if you’re going to openly be a bitch  -  .  ’ ‘  why can’t we talk to different kinds of people  ?  ’ ‘  fuck me gently with a chainsaw  .  ’ ‘  do i look like mother theresa  ?  ’ ‘  does it not bother you that everyone in this school thinks that you’re a piranha  ?  ’ ‘  like i give a shit  .  ’ ‘  they all want me as a friend or a fuck  .  ’ ‘  i’d change my life  .  new clothes  ,  new haircut  ,  new house  ,  new home  .  ’ ‘  how sad  !  blowing all your cash on two days of trying to be hip  .  ’ ‘  that’s got to be the most spooky ass question i’ve ever heard  .  ’ ‘  this is the part i hate  :  the waiting  .  ’ ‘  i’d say we’re like twenty minutes from major humilation  .  ’ ‘  deep down all teenagers are the same  .  ’ ‘  didn’t you see the breakfast club  ?  ’ ‘  what do i get out of being friends with losers  ?  ’ ‘  i give them a piece of a winner  &  they stain me with loserness  .  ’

‘  i think we should use the money for an end - of - the - world - get - together  .  ’ ‘  we could invite guys  .  ’ ‘  i’d pay madonna one million dollars to ride my face like the kentucky derby  .  ’ ‘  she should be paying me  ,  though  .  ’ ‘  don’t tell me  .  crest would be stained with loserness  .  ’ ‘  a dime increases the time  !  a buck brings good luck  !  ’ ‘  i’m sorry  ?  what are you oozing about  ?  ’ ‘  that episode with the note back there was for all of us to enjoy  .  ’ ‘  you seem determined to ruin my day  .  ’ ‘  we made a girl want to consider suicide  .  what a scream  ,  what a jest  .  ’ ‘  come on you jerk  .  ’ ‘  you know you used to have a sense of humor  .  ’ ‘  a true friend’s work is never done  .  ’ ‘  color me nauseous  .  ’ ‘  geez  ,  don’t listen to them  .  ’ ‘  you know holden caulfield wouldn’t put up with their bogus nonsense  .  ’ ‘  god (name)  ,  drool much  ?  ’ ‘  greetings  &  salutations  .  ’ ‘  this may seem like a stupid question  .  ’ ‘  there are no stupid questions  .  ’ ‘  that’s the stupidest question i’ve ever heard  .  ’ ‘  let’s kick his ass  .  ’ ‘  too old for that crap  .  let’s give him a good scare though  .  ’ ‘  you going to eat this  ?  ’ ‘  what did your boyfriend say when you told him you were moving to sherwood  ,  ohio  ?  ’ ‘  it seems to have an open door policy for assholes though  ,  doesn’t it  ?  ’ ‘  what did you say dickweed  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll repeat myself  .  ’ ‘  god  ,  they won’t expell him  .  they’ll just suspend him for a week or something  .  ’ ‘  they should throw his ass in jail  .  ’ ‘  all (name) really did was ruin two pairs of pants  .  ’ ‘  can you bleach out urine stains  ?  ’ ‘  you seem pretty amused  .  ’ ‘  i thought you were giving up on high school guys  .  ’ ‘  never say never  .  ’ ‘  did you have a brain tumor for breakfast  ?  ’ ‘  anyway  ,  i can say never to high school  .  ’ ‘  no way  ,  no day  !  ’ ‘  give it up girl  !  ’ ‘  god  ,  that was unbelievable  .  ’ ‘  so tonights the night  .  ’ ‘  blow it tonight girl  &  it’s keggers with kids all next year  .  ’ ‘  so what was the first week of spring vacation withdrawal like  ?  ’ ‘  any contestants worth mentioning  ?  ’ ‘  there’s kind of a dark horse now in the running  .  ’ ‘  will somebody please tell me why i read this spy crap  .  ’ ‘  because you’re an idiot  .  ’ ‘  you going to pull a big gulp with that  ?  ’ ‘  if your nice i’ll let you buy me a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  you know your 7-11 speak pretty well  .  ’ ‘  there’s always a 7-11 any town  ,  any time  .  ’ ‘  the extreme always makes an impression  .  ’ ‘  did you say a cherry or coke slurpee  ?  ’ ‘  he seem to enjoy tearing things down more than putting things up  .  ’ ‘  must be rough moving place to place  .  ’ ‘  everybody’s life’s got static  .  ’ ‘  is your life perfect  ?  ’ ‘  it’s not perfect  .  ’ ‘  i don’t really like my friends  .  ’ ‘  i don’t really like your friends  .  ’ ‘  it’s like they’re just people i work with  &  our job is being popular  &  shit  .  ’ ‘  maybe it’s time for a vacation  .  ’ ‘  throw your coats on the bed  .  ’ ‘  that exam was so bogus  .  ’ ‘  did you girls bring your partying slippers  .  ’ ‘  she loves to party  .  ’ ‘  i want to kill  &  you have to believe it’s for more than selfish reasons  .  ’ ‘  you have to believe it’s for more than selfish reasons  ,  more than a spoke in my menstrual cycle  .  ’ ‘  you have to believe me  .  ’ ‘  so are you a cheerleader  ?  ’ ‘  it’s so great to be able to talk to a girl  &  not have to ask what’s your major  .  ’ ‘  so when you go to college  ,  what kind of subjects do you think you’ll study  ?  ’ ‘  let’s go back to the party  .  ’ ‘  you’re just so hot tonight  .  ’ ‘  i can’t control myself  .  ’ ‘  so what do you say we head up to my room  &  have a real party  .  ’ ‘  that pecker actually scored something on his own  ?  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  ever do cocaine  ?  ’ ‘  ever since phil collins did that anti - drug thing on mtv i refuse everything  .  ’ ‘  jeez  ,  right  ,  then why don’t i do drugs  ?  ’ ‘  hey  ,  don’t run away now  .  ’ ‘  seventeen is the last year mom buys the twinkies  .  ’ ‘  christ  ,  i can’t explain it  .  ’ ‘  i understand i must stop (name)  .  ’ ‘  how’s my little cheerleader  ?  ’ ‘  now i know everyone at your high school isn’t so uptight  .  ’ ‘  i don’t feel so great  .  ’ ‘  i have a little prepared speech i give when my suitor wants more than i’d like to give him  .  ’ ‘  save the speeches for malcom x  .  i just wanna get laid  .  ’ ‘  i just wanna get laid  .  ’ ‘  you don’t deserve my fucking speech  !  ’ ‘  (name) says you’re being a real cooze  .  ’ ‘  i feel awful  ,  like i’m going to throw up  .  ’ ‘  can we jam  ,  please  ?  ’ ‘  i sound like a psycho  .  ’ ‘  let me dream of a world without (name)  ,  a world where i’m free  .  ’ ‘  you stupid cunt  !  ’ ‘  you goddamn bitch  !  ’ ‘  you were nothing before you met me  !  ’ ‘  what’s my thanks  ?  ’ ‘  i get paid in puke  !  ’ ‘  lick it up  ,  baby  .  lick  .  it  .  up  .  ’ ‘  monday morning you’re history  .  ’ ‘  dreadful etiquette  .  i apologize  .  ’ ‘  i saw the croquet set - up in the back  .  up for a match  ?  ’ ‘  no wonder you looked so mangled when i came through the window  .  ’ ‘  i’ve always treated (name)’s teen queen power play as bullshit  .  ’ ‘  but i’m really scared  .  ’ ‘  who am i going to eat lunch with on monday  ?  ’ ‘  i sound like an after school special  .  ’ ‘  that was my first game of strip croquet  ,  you know  .  ’ ‘  it’s a lot more interesting than just flinging off your clothes  &  boning away on the neighbor’s swing set  .  ’ ‘  what a night  .  ’ ‘  what a life  .  ’ ‘  now blah - blah - blah is all i do  .  ’ ‘  i use my grand i.q. to figure out what gloss to wear  &  how to hit three keggers before curfew  .  some genius  .  ’ ‘  killing her won’t solve anything  .  ’ ‘  everybody would be cast fucking adrift  .  ’ ‘  i’ll pray for rain  .  ’ ‘  it was good for me too  ,  sparky  .  ’ ‘  just saying it’s not hard to end a life  .  ’ ‘  there’s a difference between the most popular girl in school  &  dead  .  ’ ‘  i guess i don’t know what the hell i’m talking about  .  ’ ‘  i know exactly what the hell you’re talking about  &  you’re right  ,  you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  i know exactly what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  let’s just grow up  ,  be adults  ,  &  die  .  ’ ‘  i’d like to see (name) puke her guts out  .  ’ ‘  let's just concoct ourselves a little hangover cure that'll induce her to spew red  ,  white  ,  &  blue  .  ’ ‘  what’s the upchuck factor on that  ?  ’ ‘  don’t be a dick  .  that stuff’ll kill her  .  ’ ‘  pull the plug on that shit  .  ’ ‘  she’d never drink anything that looks like that  .  ’ ‘  she won’t be able to tell what she’s drinking  .  ’ ‘  you’re not funny  .  ’ ‘  we both said a lot of things we didn’t mean last night  .  ’ ‘  how the hell’d you get in here  .  ’ ‘  i whipped this up  .  family recipe  .  ’ ‘  did you put a phlegm globber in it or something  ?  ’ ‘  i’m not drinking that piss  .  ’ ‘  i knew this stuff would be too intense  .  ’ ‘  intense  ?  grow up  .  ’ ‘  you think i’ll drink it just because you call me chicken  .  ’ ‘  just give me the cup  ,  jerk  .  ’ ‘  no shit  ,  sherlock  .  ’ ‘  i just killed my best friend  .  ’ ‘  what are we going to tell the cops  ?  ’ ‘  fuck it if she can’t take a joke  .  ’ ‘  stop kidding around  .  ’ ‘  i’m going to have to send my s.a.t. scores to san quentin instead of stanford  .  ’ ‘  i’m just a little freaked  ,  all right  ?  ’ ‘  you got what you wanted  ,  you know  .  ’ ‘  it’s one thing to want somebody out of your life  .  ’ ‘  it's one thing to want somebody out of your life  .  it's another thing to serve them a wake-up cup of liquid drainer  .  ’ ‘  we did a murder  .  ’ ‘  adolescence is a period of life fraught with anxiety  &  confusion  .  ’ ‘  people think just because you’re beautiful  &  popular  ,  life is easy  &  fun  .  ’ ‘  nobody understood i had feelings too  .  ’ ‘  i die knowing no one knew the real me  .  ’ ‘  that’s good  .  have you done this before  ?  ’ ‘  call me when the shuttle lands  .  ’ ‘  let’s talk emotions  .  ’ ‘  i realize now i wasn’t really boring  ,  she was just dissatisfied with her life  .  ’ ‘  (name) was cool  ,  but cruel  .  ’ ‘  the good looks  &  bad manners gave her power but it could not give her happiness  .  ’ ‘  it’s just so unfair  !  ’ ‘  you could actually be digesting food  .  ’ ‘  fuck it  .  ’ ‘  she always said you couldn’t accessorize for shit  .  ’ ‘  i thought she was your usual airhead bitch  .  guess i was wrong  .  ’ ‘  guess i was wrong  .  lot of us were  .  ’ ‘  what a waste  .  ’ ‘  oh the humanity  .  ’ ‘  do i deliver or do i deliver  ?  ’ ‘  hurry up  ,  we’re going to get caught  .  ’ ‘  does this have something to do with menstrual cramps  &  shit  ?  ’ ‘  that was seriously warped  .  ’ ‘  she hated you  !  you hated her  !  .  ’ ‘  what are you smiling at  ?  ’ ‘  goddamn .  will somebody please tell me why I smoke these damn things  ?  ’ ‘  this is a tragic thing  &  sometimes i have a hard time dealing with it  &  stuff  .  ’ ‘  why did you kill such hot snatch  .  ’ ‘  that’s a joke  ,  man  .  people are so serious  .  ’ ‘  hail mary who aren’t in heaven  ,  pray for us sinners  . . .  so we don’t get caught  .  ’ ‘  i just want my high school to be a nice place  .  ’ ‘  did that sound bitchy  ?  ’ ‘  that pudwapper just stepped on my foot  .  ’ ‘  i’m sure your friends are happy to hear that  .  ’ ‘  i hope it isn’t going to be one of those nights where they get shitfaced  &  take us to a pasture to tip cows  .  ’ ‘  oh shit  ,  cowtipping is the fucking greatest  .  ’ ‘  when i get that feeling i need sexual healing  .  ’ ‘  yeah  ,  right  ,  asshole  .  ’ ‘  what is this shit  ?  .  ’ ‘  seven high schools in seven states  &  the only thing different was my locker combination  .  ’ ‘  don’t smile like that  ,  jesus  !  ’ ‘  our love is god  .  let’s go get a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  let’s go get a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  this thing leaves a bad taste in my mouth  .  ’ ‘  i’m sorry  ?  i don’t get it  .  ’ ‘  don’t shut up  .  i’d like to know just what i did  .  ’ ‘  i guess my emotions took over  .  ’ ‘  we won’t be using blanks this time  .  ’ ‘  you can’t be serious  ?  ’ ‘  hey listen  ,  my bonnie  &  clyde days are over  .  ’ ‘  now prepare to be a little disappointed  .  ’ ‘  shut the fuck up  ,  all right  .  ’ ‘  lighten up  ,  dude  .  ’ ‘  in those woods is some of the finest pussy in the school  &  we don’t even have to buy it a hamburger  &  a diet coke  .  ’ ‘  so do we just start fucking  ?  ’ ‘  i was hoping you’d rip my clothes off me  ,  sport  .  ’ ‘  did you miss him completely  ?  ’ ‘  i always hear gunshots when i’m high before noon  .  ’ ‘  life’s a crazy bitch  .  ’ ‘  life’s a crazy bitch  ,  don’t try to analyze it  .  ’ ‘  you took the suggestion as an opportunity to play yet another round of let’s laugh at the hippie  .  ’ ‘  you believed it because you wanted to believe it  .  ’ ‘  your true feelings were too gross  &  icky for you to face  .  ’ ‘  i did not want them dead  .  ’ ‘  ah  ,  young love  .  ’ ‘  my teen angst bullshit now has a body count  .  ’ ‘  the most popular people in the school are dead  .  ’ ‘  everybody’s sad  ,  but it’s a good kind of sad  .  ’ ‘  it’s god versus my boyfriend  &  god’s losing  .  ’ ‘  kill the jukebox  .  ’ ‘  i may be a geek but i have my pride  .  ’ ‘  why are you dissing me  ,  (name)  ?  ’ ‘  i’m trying to redefine the high school experience  .  ’ ‘  you’re ignoring the high school experience  .  ’ ‘  people are dead  &  all you can think to do is whip up some warped pity party  .  ’ ‘  if we’re going to ever build respect for each other  ,  it’s gotta be something  . . .  something real  .  ’ ‘  it was chaos  .  fucking chaos  .  ’ ‘  chaos is great  .  ’ ‘  chaos is what killed the dinosaurs  ,  darling  .  ’ ‘  we scare people into not being assholes  .  ’ ‘  our way is not our way  .  ’ ‘  i’m telling it to you  !  you  !  ’ ‘  nothing good can come from suicide  ,  from murder  ,  from death  .  ’ ‘  you can be so immature  .  ’ ‘  we beat the bitches  .  ’ ‘  do you like your father  ?  ’ ‘  never given the matter much thought  .  ’ ‘  in some sick way  ,  we unclogged the sinuses of the school  .  ’ ‘  if we’re going to keep the school healthy  ,  it’s gotta be through something having to with life  ,  not death  .  ’ ‘  whoa  ,  metaphor tennis anyone  ?  ’ ‘  if you put a nazi in a concentration camp  ,  does that make you a nazi  ?  ’ ‘  that’s it  ,  we’re breaking up  .  ’ ‘  you can’t bring them back  .  you must know that  .  ’ ‘  i’m not trying to bring back anyone except maybe myself  .  ’ ‘  to think there was a time when i thought you were cool  .  ’ ‘  if you can’t deal with me now  ,  just stay home  .  ’ ‘  if you can’t deal with me now  ,  just stay home  &  shoot your t.v.  ,  blow away a couple toasters or something  .  ’ ‘  just don’t come to school  &  don’t mess with me  .  ’ ‘  you’ll be back  !  ’ ‘  where did you get these  ?  ’ ‘  what is this  ?  blackmail  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll give you a week’s lunch money  .  ’ ‘  i don’t believe it  ,  i’m winning  .  ’ ‘  don’t get cocky  ,  girl  .  ’ ‘  i know i’m not as exciting as your other friends  .  ’ ‘  your daydreams are a lot better than my realities  ,  believe me  .  ’ ‘  nice guys finish last  .  i should know  .  ’ ‘  nice guys finish last  .  ’ ‘  you’re so polluted  .  ’ ‘  i don’t see what gives you the right to lecture  .  ’ ‘  some people just don’t matter  .  why should those who do carry their weight  ?  ’ ‘  some people just don’t matter  .  ’ ‘  it’s not even your turn  .  ’ ‘  maybe by the time we head back  ,  your tampon’ll be flushed  .  ’ ‘  christ  ,  doesn’t anybody knock  ?  ’ ‘  so i’m a dark horse  ,  huh  ?  ’ ‘  you make me blush  .  ’ ‘  did you come to tell me something  ?  something nice  ,  remotely apologetic  .  ’ ‘  i say it’s about time we got down to doing what we do best  .  ’ ‘  just finish your drink  &  get out  .  ’ ‘  these little programs eat up suicide with a spoon  .  ’ ‘  if we’re not going to watch that program  ,  can i put on my game  ?  ’ ‘  hey kids  ,  make your parents  &  teachers feel like shit  !  ’ ‘  get the respect in death you’ll never get in life  !  ’ ‘  get up off the floor  ,  your dress is getting filthy  .  ’ ‘  everybody cares about youth  ,  not the individual  .  ’ ‘  all we want is to be treated like human beings  ,  not like guinea pigs to be experimented on  &  not like bunny rabbits to be patronized  .  ’ ‘  all we want is to be treated like human beings  .  ’ ‘  i do not patronize bunny rabbits  .  ’ ‘  treated like human beings  ?  is that what you said little miss voice of a generation  ?  ’ ‘  just how do you think adults act with other adults  ?  ’ ‘  adults can be horrible to other adults  .  ’ ‘  when teenagers complain that they want to be treated like human beings it’s usually because they are being treated like human beings  .  ’ ‘  i guess i picked the wrong time to be a human being  .  ’ ‘  you’ll live  .  ’ ‘  another case of a geek trying to imitate the popular people of the school  &  failing miserably  .  ’ ‘  i said i was sorry  .  ’ ‘  you are out of control  .  ’ ‘  (name) couldn’t take the heat so she got out of the kitchen  .  just think what a better place the world would be if every nimrod followed her cue  .  ’ ‘  just shut up  &  turn on the radio  .  ’ ‘  sometimes i feel like i’m on that island  &  gilligan can be just so stupid sometimes  .  ’ ‘  dude  ,  you’ve got to remember if it wasn’t for the courage of the fearless crew  ,  the minnow would be lost  .  ’ ‘  god has cursed me  ,  i think  .  the last time i had sex  ,  the guy killed himself the next day  .  i’m failing math  ’ ‘  the last time i had sex  ,  the guy killed himself the next day  .  ’ ‘  i’m failing math  .  ’ ‘  we’ll crucify her  !  ’ ‘  my whole life is a mess  .  ’ ‘  i was supposed to be captain of the cheerleading team  .  ’ ‘  i can’t get him out of my head  .  ’ ‘  are we going to the prom or to hell  ?  ’ ‘  give me a break  .  ’ ‘  what are you trying to do  ?  kill me  ?  ’ ‘  what are you trying to do  ?  sleep  ?  ’ ‘  suicide is a private thing  .  ’ ‘  you’re giving your life away to become a goddamn statistic in u.s. fucking a today  .  that’s got to be the least private thing i can think of  .  ’ ‘  if everyone jumped off a bridge  ,  young lady  ,  would you  ?  ’ ‘  if you were happy every day of your life  ,  you wouldn’t be a human being  ,  you’d be a game show host  .  ’ ‘  if you were happy every day of your life  ,  you wouldn’t be a human being  .  ’ ‘  let’s knock off early  .  buy some shoes  ,  something lame like that  .  ’ ‘  people love me  !  ’ ‘  color me stoked  ,  girl  !  ’ ‘  people love you but i know you  .  ’ ‘  so some people need different kinds of convincing than others  .  ’ ‘  jealous much  ?  ’ ‘  why can’t you just be a friend  ?  why are you such a megabitch  ?  ’ ‘  why can’t you just be a friend  ?  ’ ‘  why are you such a megabitch  ?  ’ ‘  why are you pulling my dick  ?  ’ ‘  wanna go out tonight  ?  ’ ‘  i knew you’d come back  .  ’ ‘  it’s over  ,  (name)  !  over  !  grow up  !  ’ ‘  i don’t get it  ,  you were wrong  !  i was right  !  ’ ‘  you can’t ever find a place nice  &  peaceful because there isn’t any  .  ’ ‘  get off my bed  ,  you sick psycho  .  ’ ‘  you think you’re a rebel  ,  you’re not a rebel  .  you’re a sick psycho  .  ’ ‘  you think you’re a rebel  ,  you’re not a rebel  .  .  ’ ‘  do you think you’re a rebel  ?  ’ ‘  you say tomayto  ,  say tomahto  .  let’s call the the whole thing off  .  ’ ‘  i usually go for whole sentences myself  ,  but hey this is perfecto  .  ’ ‘  you’re not listening  !  i’m not on your side  .  ’ ‘  this knife is filthy  .  ’ ‘  you don’t get it  ,  do you  ?  ’ ‘  society nods its head at any horror the american teenager can think to bring upon itself  .  ’ ‘  let’s hope she’s rubbing noses with jesus  .  ’ ‘  is this turnout weak or what  ?  ’ ‘  he’s wrong but i’m going to teach him what’s right  .  ’ ‘  i’m going to stop (name) if it’s the last thing i do  .  ’ ‘  i can’t believe you did it  .  i was teasing  .  ’ ‘  sure  ,  i climbed up here to kill you  ,  but first i was going to try  &  get you back  .  ’ ‘  we coulda toasted marshmallows together  .  ’ ‘  hey  ,  why so tense  ?  ’ ‘  sorry tiger  ,  i’m a little busy  .  ’ ‘  get a job  .  ’ ‘  oh my god  ,  another damn pep assembly  .  ’ ‘  may i see your hall pass  ?  ’ ‘  i knew that loose was too noose  !  i mean  ,  noose too loose  !  goddamn you  !  ’ ‘  like father  ,  like son  .  ’ ‘  you didn’t say simon says  .  ’ ‘  live by the sword  . . .  ’ ‘  you think just because you started this thing  ,  you can end it  ?  ’ ‘  you want to wipe the slate clean as much as i do  .  ’ ‘  so maybe i am killing everyone in the school because nobody loves me  .  ’ ‘  you have a purpose though  !  remember  ?  ’ ‘  let’s face it  ,  the only place different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven  .  ’ ‘  there’s a school that self - destructed not because society didn’t care  ,  but because that school was society  .  ’ ‘  is that deep or what  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll let you put it in your diary  ,  babe  .  free of charge  .  ’ ‘  you know what i want  ,  babe  ?  ’ ‘  you know what i want  ,  babe  ?  cool guys like you out of my life  .  ’ ‘  but don’t worry  ,  these here were ich luge bullets  .  ’ ‘  color me impressed  .  ’ ‘  you really fucked me up  ,  (name)  .  ’ ‘  you’ve got power  ,  (name)  .  power i didn’t think you had  .  ’ ‘  the slate is clean  .  ’ ‘  pretend i did blow up the school  ,  all the schools  .  now that you’re dead  ,  what are you gonna do with your life  ?  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  you look like hell  .  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  my love  ,  there’s a new sheriff in town  .  ’ ‘  my date for the prom kind of flaked out on me  ,  so i thought if you weren’t doing anything that night we could go to the video store  &  rent some new releases or something  .  maybe pop some popcorn  .  ’ ‘  my date for the prom kind of flaked out on me  .  ’ ‘  i thought if you weren’t doing anything that night we could go to the video store  &  rent some new releases or something  .  maybe pop some popcorn ��.  ’

[mrkwonandmrchoibabygirl]

Now 2~~G-Dragon pt.20

Genre:Angst/SMUT

Rated:NSFW

Pairing: GD X Reader

wordcount:3,170

Masterlist

DISCLAIMER!:remember this is just an edit of an original book called after by anna todd i do not own this book

Y/N POV

Our last night with Jiyong’s mom consists mostly of drinking tea and her telling embarrassing stories of when Jiyong was little. That and about ten reminders that next year Christmas is in England, “No excuses.”

The thought of celebrating Christmas with Jiyong a year from now makes my stomach flutter. For the first time since we met, I can see a future with him. Not necessarily having children and getting married, but for once I feel secure enough about his feelings to be able to look a year ahead.

The next morning, when Jiyong returns from dropping Trish off at the airport at far too early an hour, I wake up. I hear him drop his clothes onto the floor, and he climbs back into bed wearing only boxers. He wraps his arms around me once more. I’m still a little irritated with him from our earlier conversation, but his arms are cold, and I missed him during his absence from our bed.

“I go back to work tomorrow,” I say after a few minutes, unsure if he’s already fallen asleep or not.

“I know,” he replies.

“I’m excited to get back to Vance.”

“Why?”

“Because I love it there, and I’ve had the week off. I miss working.”

“You’re quite the overachiever,” he mocks, and I know he’s rolling his eyes even though I can’t see his face.

Reflexively, this makes me roll my own eyes. “Sorry that I love my internship and you don’t like your job.”

“I do like my job, and I had the same job you have. I just left it for something better,” he brags.

“Do you only like it more because you get to do it from home?”

“Yeah, that’s the main reason.”

“What’s the other reason?”

“I felt like people thought I only got the job because of Vance.”

This is not a huge revelation, but it’s a much more honest answer than I expected from him. I expected a word or two about how the job sucked or was annoying.

“Do really you think people thought that?” I roll onto my back, and Jiyong leans up on his elbow to look down at me.

“I don’t know. No one said it, but I felt like they were thinking it. Especially after he hired me as an actual employee, not just an intern.”

“Do you think he was upset when you left to work for someone else?”

He smiles a smile that appears especially bright in the half-lit bedroom. “No, I don’t think so. His employees were constantly complaining about my supposed attitude anyway.”

“Supposed attitude?” I tease.

He cups my cheek and dips his head down to kiss my forehead. “Yes, supposed. I am very charming. No attitude at all.” He smiles against my skin. I giggle, and he smiles even more, pressing his forehead against mine. “What do you want to do today?” he asks.

“I don’t know; I was thinking of calling Taeyang and going to the store.”

He draws back a little. “For what?”

“To talk to him and see when he can meet up with me. I’d like to give him those tickets.”

“The gifts are at their house. I’m sure they already opened them.”

“I don’t see them opening them without us being there.”

“I do.”

“My point exactly,” I tease.

But Jiyong’s already turned serious with the mention of his family. “Do you think . . . What do you think about me apologizing . . . well, not apologizing . . . but what if I called him—you know, my dad?”

I know that I need to tread lightly when it comes to Jiyong and Ken. “I think you should call him. I think you should try to make sure what happened yesterday doesn’t ruin the beginning of the relationship you were forming with him.”

“I guess . . .” He sighs. “After I hit him, I thought for a second that you were going to stay there and make me leave.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, I did. I’m glad you didn’t, but that’s what I thought.”

I lift my head off the mattress and plant a small kiss on his jawline instead of answering. I have to admit that I probably would have done just that had he not already come clean about his past. That changed everything for me. It changed the way I look at Jiyong —not in a negative way, or a positive one, just a more understanding way.

Jiyong looks past me toward the window. “I can call him today, I guess.”

“Do you think that we could go to their house? I really want to give them their gifts.”

Blinking back to me, he says, “We could just tell them to open them while you’re on the phone. That’s basically the same, only you won’t have to see their fake smiles at your terrible presents.”

“ Jiyong !” I whine.

He chuckles and lays his head on my chest. “I’m teasing; you give the best gifts. That key chain with the wrong sports team was killer.” He laughs.

“Go back to bed.” I swat at his messy hair.

“What did you need from the store?” he asks as he lies back down.

I forgot that I had mentioned that. “Nothing.”

“No, no, you said you needed to go to the store. What was it, plugs or something?”

“Plugs?”

“You know to . . . plug yourself.”

What? “I don’t get it . . .”

“Tampons.”

I blush. My whole body blushes, I’m sure. “Oh . . . no.”

“Do you even have a period?”

“Oh my God, Jiyong, stop talking about it.”

“What? You’re embarrassed to talk about your men-stru-ation with me?” When he lifts up his face to look at me, a huge grin is plastered across it.

“I’m not embarrassed. It’s just inappropriate,” I defend, highly embarrassed.

He smiles. “We’ve done quiet a few inappropriate things, Theresa.”

“Don’t call me Theresa—and stop talking about it!” I groan and cover my face with my hands.

“Are you bleeding now?” I feel his hand travel down my stomach.

“No . . .” I lie.

I have gotten away from exactly this situation before because we’re always so on and off and it just never happened. Now that we’re going to be around each other more steadily, I knew this would happen—I just was avoiding it.

“So you wouldn’t mind if I . . .” His hand slips into the top of my panties.

“ Jiyong !” I squeal and smack his hand away.

He chuckles. “Admit it, then; say, ‘ Jiyong, I’m on my period.’ ”

“No, I am not saying that.” I know my face is a deep red by now.

“Come on, it’s just a little blood.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“Bloody amazing.” He smiles, obviously proud of his ridiculous joke.

“You’re obnoxious.”

“You need to lighten up . . . learn to go with the flow.” He laughs harder.

“Oh my God! Okay, if I say it, will you stop with the menstrual jokes?”

“I’m not making jokes. Period.”

His laugh is contagious, and it feels great to be lying in bed laughing with Jiyong, despite the subject of conversation. “ Jiyong , I’m on my period. I just started right before you got home. There, are you happy?”

“Why are you embarrassed by it?”

“I’m not—I just don’t think it’s something that women should discuss.”

“It’s not a big deal, I don’t mind a little blood.” He presses himself against me.

I scrunch my nose. “You’re gross.”

“I’ve been called worse.” He smiles.

“You’re in a good mood today,” I point out.

“Maybe you would be, too, if it wasn’t that time of month.”

I groan and grab the pillow from behind me to cover my face. “Can we please talk about something else?” I say through the pillow.

“Sure . . . sure . . . someone’s bloody panties are in a twist.” He laughs.

I pull the pillow from my face and hit him in the head with it before climbing off the bed. I hear him laughing as he opens the dresser, to find a pair of pants, I assume. It’s early, only seven in the morning, but I’m wide awake. I start a pot of coffee and make myself a bowl of cereal. I can’t believe Christmas is over; in a few days the year will be over.

“What do you usually do to celebrate the New Year?” I ask Jiyong when he sits down at the table in white cotton drawstring pants.

“Go out, usually.”

“Go where?”

“Parties, or a club. Or both. Last year was both.”

“Oh.” I hand him the bowl of cereal.

“What would you like to do?”

“I’m not sure. I want to go out, I think,” I answer.

He raises one eyebrow. “You do?”

“Yeah . . . don’t you?”

“I don’t really give a shit what we do, but if you want to go out, that is what we shall do.” He brings a spoonful of Frosted Flakes to his mouth.

“Okay . . .” I say, unsure of where we’ll go. I make myself another bowl. “Are you going to ask your father if we can stop by today?” I ask him and take seat next to him.

“I don’t know . . .”

“Maybe they could come here?” I suggest.

Jiyong’s eyes narrow. “I don’t think so.”

“Why not? You’d be more comfortable here, right?”

He closes his eyes for a moment before opening them again. “I guess. Let me call them in a bit.”

I finish my breakfast quickly and stand up from the table.

“Where are you going?” he asks.

“To clean, obviously.”

“Clean what? The place is spotless.”

“No, it’s not, and I want it to be perfect if we’re having guests over.” I rinse my bowl and place it in the dishwasher. “You could help clean, you know? Since you’re the one who makes most of the mess,” I point out.

“Oh no. You’re much better at cleaning than I am.” He gestures at the cereal box.

I roll my eyes but give it to him. I don’t mind cleaning, because, honestly, I like things a certain way, and Jiyong’s version of cleaning isn’t actually cleaning. He just shoves things wherever they’ll fit.

“Oh, and don’t forget that we need to go to the store to get your plugs.” He laughs.

“Stop calling them that!” I throw a dish towel at his face, and he laughs harder at my embarrassment.

After the apartment is clean to my standards, I go to the store to get tampons and a few things in case Ken, Karen, and Tae come over. Jiyong tried to accompany me, but I knew he’d be teasing me about the tampons the entire time, so I made him stay home.

When I return, he’s sitting in the same spot on the couch. “Have you called your father yet?” I ask from the kitchen.

“No . . . I was waiting for you,” he replies, then wanders into the kitchen and sits down at the table with a sigh. “I’ll call now.”

I nod and sit across from him while he presses his phone to his ear.

“Uh . . . hey.” Jiyong says into the receiver. Then he sets the phone to speaker and places it on the table between us.

“ Jiyong?” Ken’s voice is surprised.

“Yeah . . . um, look, I was wondering if you wanted to come over or something.”

“Come over?”

Jiyong looks up at me, and I can tell that his patience is already wearing thin. My hand moves across the table to rest atop his, and I nod in encouragement.

“Yeah . . . you, Karen, and tae. We can exchange gifts, since we didn’t yesterday. Mum’s gone,” he says.

“You’re sure that’s okay?” Ken asks his son.

“I just asked, didn’t I?” Jiyong says, and I squeeze his hand. “I mean . . . yeah, that’s fine,” he corrects, and I smile at him.

“Okay, well, let me talk to Karen, but I know she’ll be thrilled. What time will be good for you?” Jiyong looks at me. I mouth two, and he tells his father.

“Okay . . . well, we’ll see you at two.”

“Y/N will text Tae the address,” Jiyong says and hangs up the phone.

“That wasn’t so bad, right?” I ask.

He rolls his eyes. “Sure.”

“What should I wear?”

He gestures to my jeans and WCU T-shirt. “That.”

“Definitely not. This is our Christmas.”

“No, it’s the day after Christmas, so you should wear jeans.” He smiles, and his fingers tug at his lip ring.

“I’m not wearing jeans.” I laugh and head to the bedroom to decide what to wear.

I’M HOLDING MY WHITE DRESS to my chest in front of the mirror when Jiyong walks into the bedroom. “I don’t know if wearing white is the best idea.” He smiles.

“For God’s sake, stop it!” I say.

“You’re cute when you’re embarrassed.”

I grab my maroon dress from the closet. This dress holds a lot of memories for me; I wore it to my first frat party with Steph. I miss Steph despite all the anger I feel . . . felt toward her. I feel betrayed by her, but at the same time in a lot of ways she was right when she said it wasn’t fair for me to forgive Jiyong but not her.

“What’s going on in that mind of yours?” Jiyong questions.

“Nothing . . . I was just thinking of Steph.”

“What about her?”

“I don’t know . . . I miss her, sort of. Do you miss your friends?” I ask. He hasn’t mentioned any of them since the letter.

“No.” He shrugs. “I would rather spend my time with you.”

I’m enjoying this honest Jiyong , but I note, “You could still spend time with them, too.”

“I guess. I don’t know; I don’t really care either way. Do you even want to be around them . . . you know, after everything?” His eyes focus on the floor.

“I don’t know . . . but I’d be willing to try, at least, and see how it goes. Not Chaerin, though.” I scowl.

He looks up mischievously. “But the two of you are such great friends.”

“Ugh, enough about her. What do you think they’ll do on New Year’s Eve?” I ask. I don’t know how it will be to be around everyone, but I miss having friends, or what passed for friends.

“There’ll probably be a party. Logan is obsessed with New Year’s . . . Are you sure you want to go out with them?”

I smile. “Yeah . . . if it blows up in my face, then we’ll stay in next year.”

Jiyong’s eyes widen when I mention next year, but I pretend I don’t notice. I need our Christmas do-over to be peaceful today. I’m focusing on today.

“I need to make something for everyone to eat. I should have said three; it’s already noon, and I’m not even ready.” I rub my hands over my makeup-free face.

“Go ahead and get ready, I’ll make something . . .” Jiyong says, then smirks. “Just make sure you eat only what I put on your plate.”

“Joking about poisoning your father, lovely,” I tease. He shrugs and wanders off. I wash my face and apply light makeup before pulling my hair out of its ponytail and curling the ends. By the time I finish getting ready and get myself dressed, a wonderful garlic smell is coming from the kitchen.

When I join Jiyong in the kitchen, I see he’s laid out a couple of trays of fruit and vegetables and already set the table. I’m really impressed by what he’s done, though I do have to fight the urge to rearrange a few things. I’m so glad that Jiyong was willing to invite his father over to our apartment, and even more relieved that he seems to be in a really good mood today. Checking the clock, I see our company will be here in thirty minutes, so I begin cleaning up the small mess Jiyong made while cooking and get the apartment spotless again.

I wrap my arms around his waist as he stands in front of the oven. “Thank you for doing all of this.”

He shrugs. “It’s nothing.”

“Are you okay?” I ask and unwrap my arms and turn him to face me.

“Yeah . . . I’m fine.”

“Are you sure you aren’t a little nervous?” I ask. I can tell he is.

“No . . . well, just a little. It’s just weird as fuck to have him coming here, you know?”

“I know. I’m really proud of you for inviting him.” I press my cheek against his chest, and his hands move to my waist.

“You are?”

“Of course I am, ba— Jiyong .”

“What was that . . . what were you going to say?”

I hide my face. “Nothing.” I don’t know where this sudden urge to call him pet names comes from, but it’s embarrassing.

“Tell me,” he coos and lifts my chin to force me out of hiding.

“I don’t know why, but I almost called you ‘babe’ again.” I bring my bottom lip between my teeth, and his smile grows.

“Go ahead, call me it,” he says.

“You’ll make fun of me.” I smile weakly.

“No, I won’t. I call you ‘baby’ all the time.”

“Yeah . . . but it’s different when you do it.”

“How so?”

“I don’t know . . . it’s, like, sexier or something when you do . . . more romantic. I don’t know.” I flush.

“You’re awfully shy today.” He smiles and plants a kiss on my forehead. “I like it, though. So go ahead and call me it.”

I hug him tighter. “Okay.”

“Okay what?”

“Okay . . . babe.” The word tastes strange rolling off of my tongue.

“Again.”

I let out a surprised squeak as he lifts me onto the cold countertop and stands between my legs. “Okay, babe!” I repeat.

His cheeks are a deeper shade of pink than usual. “I really love that. It’s . . . what did you say? Sexy and romantic?” He smiles.

A sudden bravery makes me speak again. “Is it, babe?” I smile and bite my lip again.

“Yes . . . incredibly sexy.” He presses his lips against my neck, and I shiver as his hands trail up my thighs.

“Don’t think these will keep me out.” His fingers draw circles on my black tights.

“They may not, but the . . . you know will.”

A knock at the door makes me jump, and Jiyong smiles and winks at me. As he walks to the door, he says over his shoulder, “Oh, baby . . . that won’t either.”

[mbtizone]

Veronica Sawyer (Heathers): INFP

Dominant Introverted Feeling [Fi]: What Veronica wants more than anything is to be free of Heather. She doesn’t like being part of her mean tricks or participating in her bullying. Veronica has trouble with anything that’s phony. When the entire school is grieving over the loss of Heather, even though almost everyone hated her, it makes Veronica sick. When she finds out that there will be a spread dedicated to her in the yearbook, Veronica is appalled. She was pissed about the “love-in” that the school organized. Veronica believes in getting justice. She plans to get back at Heather Chandler by mixing milk and orange juice (and attempts to throw in some phlegm, though she’s unable to produce any). She also conspires with JD to get back at Kurt for lying to people about what happened between them on their double date. Although she did want to get revenge, Veronica didn’t want to kill them. She tends to internalize a lot of her feelings and can be self-destructive when trying to deal with them (intentionally burning the palm of her hand, getting in the shower with all of her clothing on in the locker room). Veronica is quite reflective and regularly writes in a journal to get out all of the feelings she suppresses. Veronica doesn’t want to write a note to torment Martha Dunnstock, because she doesn’t have anything against the girl! Although Veronica does comply with Heather’s demands, she has no problem telling her off when she believes it’s necessary. She eventually comes to hate what JD has turned her into and when she feels he’s gone too far, she walks out on him. Even though she’s become popular, Veronica doesn’t forget her former friends, and takes time to have a conversation with Betty Finn, before being pulled away by Heather Chandler (“I was talking to somebody!”

Auxiliary Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: Veronica isn’t satisfied with the way things are, and tends to envision what could be. She dreams of a world without Heather and “just wants her high school to be a nice place.” She wants people to be good to each other and hates being part of a clique that terrorizes social misfits. Veronica is a gifted writer and is able to use her skills to craft “suicide” notes for the classmates she accidentally helps to kill. Veronica is metaphorical and uses vivid analogies, particularly when writing in her diary. She wants change and nothing anybody does is making a difference. Between her call to Hot Probs, and the fact that Heather Duke and the rest of the school were teasing her for it, Veronica knew to run after Heather McNamara, fearing that she might attempt to kill herself. Veronica is able to come up with ideas – such as pretending to commit suicide so JD would think she was dead. Sometimes, she has trouble seeing how things will play out (not realizing JD’s deception, failing to see that killing one popular person will result in another one taking their place, causing an endless cycle). Veronica uses her creativity to do things differently. Sure, we could just have sex on the neighbor’s swing set, but playing strip croquette would be a lot more fun. Even though she’s never forged a suicide note before, the words seem to flow out of Veronica effortlessly and poetically.

Tertiary Introverted Sensing [Si]: Although she does stand up to Heather, Veronica keeps going back to her. She’ll lash out at her one day, and go running back the next. She seems to regret the choices that she’s made that have landed her in her current situation and longs for simpler times. When Veronica begins to struggle with what she’s done, she seeks comfort by reaching out to an old friend – Betty Finn, after ditching her for the Heathers. Veronica pays attention to detail, as she points out that Heather Chandler would never use a word like “myriad” in her suicide note, since she missed it on the vocab test. She also points out that Heather would never drink anything that looked like the liquid drainer.

Inferior Extroverted Thinking [Te]: When Veronica decides she needs to do something to stop JD, she begins a quest to take him down and prevent him from blowing up the school. She sets out to do whatever it takes to stop him, even going so far as to shoot him. Veronica is direct, blunt, and has no problem asserting herself. It’s hard for Veronica to navigate within Westerburg’s established social structure and seeks to fix the problem, although she ends up doing more harm than good in the process by accidentally eliminating multiple classmates. Veronica wants to make a difference and enact real change, but her attempt to push back and rebel against the system gets entirely out of hand (“My teen angst bullshit has a body count.)

Note: I typically see Veronica typed as either an INFJ or an INFP. I don’t think she’s an INFJ, but I strongly considered ISFP for her because she can act impulsively and fails to consider the consequences of her actions. I see her as more future-focused than living in the present. Her solutions to things tend to be less “creative” than JD’s (milk, orange juice, and phlegm cocktail versus liquid drainer). She also says that killing Heather wouldn’t solve anything, instead suggesting to just “grow up, be adults, and die.” She takes what JD says at face value and believes his story about the “Ich Luge” bullets, failing to realize that he’s lying to her about the plan regarding Kurt and Ram. When she berates herself for being stupid, JD suggests that she “believed it because she wanted to believe it.” She denies this, and we don’t really know for certain what the truth is. I’ve seen this movie more times than I can count, and can literally recite every single line, yet I still don’t feel as confident about Veronica’s type as I should. I could probably construct a fairly decent argument for ISFP, but I’m sticking with INFP for now.

Enneagram: 4w5 7w6 8w9 Sx/So

Quotes:

Veronica: Dear Diary, I want to kill. And you have to believe it’s for more than just selfish reasons. More than just a spoke in my menstrual cycle. You have to believe me.

Veronica: Betty Finn was a true friend and I sold her out for a bunch of swatch dogs and Diet Coke heads. Killing Heather would be like offing the Wicked Witch of the West. Wait, East. West! God, I sound like a fucking psycho. Tomorrow I’ll be kissing her aerobicized ass, but tonight, let me dream of a world without Heather. A world where I am free.

JD: Thank you. That was my first game of strip croquet. Veronica: You’re welcome. It’s a lot more interesting than just flinging off your clothes and boning away on the neighbor’s swing set.

Veronica: What a night. What a life. They wanted to move me into high school out of the sixth grade because I was supposed to be this big genius. And then we decided to chuck the idea because I’d have trouble making friends, blah, blah, blah. Now blah, blah, blah is all I do. I use my grand IQ to decide what color gloss to wear and how to hit three keggers before curfew.

Veronica: Oh, the cops. I can’t believe this is my life. Oh my god. I’m gonna have to send my SAT scores to San Quentin instead of Stanford. JD: All right, just a little freaked here. At least you got what you wanted, you know? Veronica: Got what I wanted? It is one thing to want somebody out of your life. It is another thing to serve them a wakeup cup full of liquid drainer.

JD: All right, we did a murder. Now that’s a crime. But if this were like a suicide thing, you know? Veronica: Like a suicide thing? JD: Yeah. I mean, you can do Heather’s handwriting as well as your own, right? Right? Veronica: You might think what I’ve done is shocking. JD: Um, to me, though, suicide is the natural answer to the myriad of problems life has given me. Veronica: That’s good, but Heather would never use the word myriad. JD: This is the last thing she’ll ever write, she’s gonna wanna cash in on as many 50-cent words as possible. Veronica: Yeah, but she missed myriad on the vocab test two weeks ago. JD: That only proves my point more. The word is a badge for her failures at school. Veronica: Oh. Ok, you’re probably right. People think just because you’re beautiful ad popular life is easy and fun. No one understood, I had feelings too. JD: I die knowing no one knew the real me. Veronica: That’s good. Have you done this before?

Veronica: Can’t you see these programs are eating suicide up with a spoon? They’re making it sound like it’s a cool thing to do.

Veronica: All we want is to be treated like human beings, not to be experimented on like guinea pigs or patronized like bunny rabbits.

Veronica: God, you’re an asshole. Mute him. Heather, how many networks did you run to? What are you talking about? You hated her, she hated you.

Veronica: Ram and I died the day we realized we could never reveal our forbidden love to an uncaring and ununderstanding world. The joy we shared in each other’s arms was greater than any touchdown. Yet we were forced to live the lie of sexist, beer guzzling, jock assholes.

JD: Look, you believed it because you wanted to believe it. Your true feelings were too gross and icky for you to face. Veronica: I did not want them dead! JD: You did too. Veronica: I did not! JD: Did too! Veronica: I did not! JD: Did too! Veronica: I did not! JD: Did too! Veronica: Did not! JD: Did too! Veronica: Did not, did not, did not! Shut up! I did not want them to- JD: Come on, you did, you just- Veronica: Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb!

Veronica: Dear Diary, my teen angst bullshit has a body count. The most popular people in school are dead. Everybody’s sad, but it’s a weird kind of sad. Suicide gave Heather depth, Kurt a soul, Ram a brain. I don’t know what it’s given me, but I’ve got no control over myself when I’m with JD. Are we going to prom or to hell?

Veronica: Hi, I’m sorry. Technically, I did not kill Heather Chandler, but hey, who am I trying to kid, right? I just want my high school to be a nice place. Amen. Did that sound bitchy?

Veronica: That thing this afternoon. I’m so angry! It was chaos, fucking chaos. JD: What are you talking about, huh? I mean, today was great! Chaos is great! Chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling. Face it, our way is the way! We scare people into not being assholes! Veronica: Our way is not our way!

[JD shoots the radio] Veronica: That’s it, we’re breaking up! JD: What? But you can’t bring them back, you must know that. Veronica: I am not trying to bring anybody back except maybe myself.

Veronica: And to think there was a time when I actually thought you were cool. Man, if you can’t deal with me now then just stay home and shoot your TV. Blow up a couple toasters or something. Just don’t come to school and don’t mess with me!

Veronica: Heather told everyone about Heather. Yes, Dear Diary, I’ve cut off Heather Chandler’s head and Heather Duke’s head has sprouted back in it’s place. Like some mythological thing my eighth grade boyfriend would have known about. Heather’s even doing the old note trick. I’ve seen JD’s way. I’ve seen Miss Pauline Fleming’s way. And nothing has changed. I guess that’s Heather’s way. And Jesus, what about JD? I can’t get him out of my head.

Veronica: Heather, you’re throwing your life away to become a statistic in the US-fucking-A today. Now that is about the least private thing I can think of. Heather McNamara: What about Heather and Kurt and Ram? Veronica: If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you? Heather McNamara: Probably. Veronica: If you were happy every day of your life you wouldn’t be a human being, you’d be a game show host.

Veronica: Dear Diary, last entry. No one can stop JD. Not the FBI, the CIA, or the PTA. He once told me that the extreme always makes an impression. Well now it’s my turn. Let’s see how the son of a bitch reacts to a suicide he didn’t perform himself!

Veronica Sawyer (Heathers): INFP was originally published on MBTI Zone

[crescentmoonhills]

Psychological. Second try at writing

Friday morning. The last time I would have to hear my alarm, well, until Monday. I turn off the buzzing of the alarm but I know the buzz wouldn’t stop. It never did. Countless whispers, quiet and scratchy like a mouse in the wall grating at my soul. Going ceaselessly louder and louder by the day. Begging, pleading, crying, screaming, screeching and— "Shut up, shut up." I whispered to myself, climbing out of bed. I go downstairs to start making coffee. The office has a Keurig machine, but I have always thought you couldn't beat a pot of coffee in the morning. I step outside to smoke my first one of the day.

I put a cigarette to my lips, light it, and without even looking up, I know the neighbors are judging me. I know everyone is. I know all too well. A washed-up author with not a single book to his name—no, a 35 year old unemployed man left behind by his wife, friends, and even families. Give applause to the one and only, Mr. Ernst Klein. Heh. I could hear them speaking from here. Mumbling, whispering, hushing, and gossiping. Ignore it, Ernst. Ignore it. They have enough reasons to do so and you are used to it anyway. I took a deep drag down to the end and threw it on the ground. Figured if I’m going to end myself might as well make it enjoyable. I go in, grab a cup of coffee, took a book, and return to the patio.

****

At the altar she prayed. Sending her prayer to The Almighty Creator. The oldest and most heartless of gods. The creator of the Nine Great Gods and the world as she knows it. The one who had created her and her fate. The one who had sent her on to this holy mission of hers. The one who had given her, friends and companions. The one who had given her, families. The one who had given her, the love of her life. Also the one who had blessed her with a beautiful daughter and a charming son. Yet, He is also the one who took them all away. He took from her, her friends, companions, families, lover, and her precious children. However, she never faltered. She knows that everything her Creator did must have a reason and He had yet to abandon her and her world, she didn’t care if everyone around her thought she was insane. Through her incessant sobbing, she prayed, and prayed, and prayed again. She pushed her calls as hard as she could into the voids of her mind in hoping they would make it out to her one and only Creator.

“Please bring them back… they’re my everything”

****

Reading has, for as long as I could remember, always been my hobby. It lets me escape from this cruel reality that I live in and all the problems that follows it. Escapism. I know. It won’t solve anything but at least it helps me cope with it. Please bring them back… they’re my everything. I mean, not everyone could face their problems head-on, no, no. Not everyone… are that brave. At least I know I’m a coward. If running away from my problems and live my whole life in peace is being a coward then yes, I gladly accept being a coward.

I looked down at the book that I randomly took from the piles of lined papers and moldy writings which I had proudly called my bookcase. I looked at it and there it was, a novel with my name arrogantly printed on it. Sigh. Out of all books. It was a book that I had written myself. Please bring them back… they’re my everything. I had abandoned this story years ago because it wasn’t quite well received. Monotone, uninteresting, unnecessarily long, unoriginal, mediocre, lackluster, and the compliments goes on. None of my books are well received actually. No. None of them, and so I finished writing none of it.

****

It called to me that day as it does now.

Whispering.

Yearning.

Promising.

Promising of a world torn apart by fire, divine and nuclear, all encompassing and devastating our planet. Such is the will of the Creator. So I obey.

“I hope it gets bet—” A shaky voice barely comes out of my mouth only to be interrupted. “Cough!” I coughed so hard it felt like my lungs were to come out. I looked down at my hands and I see blood. Sigh. I guess I don’t have much to live anymore. A couple weeks probably? No? A couple months? Well like Engels used to say life keeps going like a menstrual keeps flowing hahah. Smiling as I thought to myself. I hope it gets better. I really do. The clicking of the Geiger counter is my only friend now. Ever since the factory exploded it seems to be going higher and higher by the day. Every step feels excruciatingly painful, but I keep walking.

I miss Engels, I miss Immanuel, I even miss that cocky playboy Jean. Dog tags clinking in my hand. Geiger counter clicking faster and faster. It’s ok. The temple is close now. We’ll be there any minute now. C’mon Pascal you can do it!” I thought as I continued to shamble about but fate has other plans I guess. I was a couple feet away from the temple when I realized it. I was surrounded by reavers. “Give me all your food, kid! I know you factoryborns have a lot o’ them luxury canned foods!” Yelled one of the reavers. “Forget it boss just kill ‘em and we could sell his meat to the carvers for extra foods”. That night, the snows were colored red.

God forgive me. I couldn’t bring my friends to rest. I prayed as I breathe my last.

“What did we do to deserve this?”

****

While I read, I hear a voice. What did we do to deserve this? No, not the usual voice, those gritty, harsh, and dry calls were still there. They were always there but I had learned to ignore them. Instead I focused on a more vivid voice. One that said, “Will you be able to come?”. I looked up, and saw Karen. I grumbled, annoyed that she had interrupted me. “Fuck away will you, Karen,” I said. What did we do to deserve this?

“I’m not going to your fucking baby shower.”

Karen sighed, “Look, I know you don’t like him, but he’s still your brother, Ernst—”

“I don’t care whether or not he’s my brother, Karen. I just don’t want to waste my time.”

“Family bonding is not wasting time, Ernst. It’s a tradition! And considering your situation you might need it now more than ever.” Karen yelled.

“Tradition is just peer pressure from the dead, Karen.” Please bring them back… they’re my everything.

“Why are you being so stubborn, Ernst?”

“I see no point in pleasing the dead” I said. What did we do to deserve this?

“Is that why you didn’t visit dad when he’s laying on his deathbed?” I grit my teeth. Please bring them back… they’re my everything.

“He asked to see his son at least once before he died and yet you never came. You didn’t even come to his funeral!”

“I have reasons, Karen! I’m sure dad will understand and he would forgive me! I did what he would’ve wanted me to do and that is doing my responsibilities!!”

“The way I see it It’s better for you to go and make up with your brother rather than locking yourself in that room you call your office. You don’t have anything better to do anyway.” Please bring them back… they’re my everything.

“I do have things to do, Karen! I’m an author. Writing is my responsibility!” I hollered “It’s unbearable, Karen. I can’t leave them alone.” so I said as I’m sharply sucking a breath. What did we do to deserve this? “I— I just can’t. Enough! You wouldn’t understand.”

She sighed and patiently asked “Just do me a favor and come will you?”

“Sorry, I have better things to do,” I said shortly, and went inside the house.

****

The colony's inhabitants were gathered in a large auditorium. They were laughing and smiling no less than an hour ago. The auditorium was safe and impenetrable yet also serves as a prison in which none can escape. The door was sealed from the outside. Through a thick window covered in scratch marks, Commander Alexei could see decaying bodies in red jump suits. Some were holding others in one last embrace. Others were apparently trying to escape through some sort of vent, with little luck.

“Commander?” Hadrian, the only member of the crew who knows about the program, asked “Is there really no other option?”

On the desk were a stack of journals, each marked with dates ranging from 3010 to 3075.

“It’s been years—no, decades since the last reply from Earth, Hadrian” he said while wiping a gun. It was an unusual gun. A very ancient one which dates back to the late 1800. It’s very unique to say the least. It was a type of gun called a revolver. It’s a single-action, cartridge-firing, top break revolver. Fires a type of projectile called bullets. Uses no energy cartridge, no focusing lens, and forget fusion core reactor, there’s not even a normal fission core reactor. It uses gunpowder and pressure instead. Ignition fills the barrel with gas thus increase the pressure and push the bullet out. An effective and cheap way to kill. How interesting, when killing is involved people really do anything to improve, thought Alexei as he fills the cylinder with bullets.

“Thus, I am forced to conclude the worst: we lost the nuclear war, and our nation and families are destroyed. Even this failsafe colony will not be enough to keep us alive. Instead, we will all die of dehydration. Faced with that consequence, I had no choice but to exercise Protocol 99 and terminate the colony in a quick and relatively painless way.” He had no other choice. His nation was dubbed as evil simply because they had a different political view. And so the others waged war. War don’t need a concrete reason anyway, as long as they see profits and merits in it men would jump on it the second they got the chance to. Who gets to decide morals anyway? Who are them to say that my country is evil? Are we evil for defending our beliefs? Am I a villain for defending my country and families? No one gets to decides evil and just. Only god can do that and the fact that this happens means that there is no god in this world, thought Alexei.

I’m sorry, comrades. Your screams…. your screams will haunt me even after I take my own life. Alexei points the gun at his own head and Hadrian follow suit. “I will see you later, Sir” nods Hadrian. “Commander Alexei, retiring from duty. Should humanity ever rise from the ashes and return to the red planet, know that we tried. Long Live The Union”. Alexei closed his eyes and prayed for the first time in his life. The page was spattered with small flecks of blood.

“God is not real after all. There are no free will”

****

I hated writing. What did we do to deserve this? No, I don’t hate it, what I hated was the responsibility that came with it. God is not real. There are no free will. Despite my mediocre talent in writing, I loved to write, I really did but all of my stories had a dark twist. What did we do to deserve this? I loved writing stories with a dark twist but I wish I had known any better. Oh, how I wished I had. What did we do to deserve this? I’m not sure when it started but it was there, always, unending, ceaseless and incessant. Please bring them back… they’re my everything. The whispers— no, should I call it prayers instead? Yes, prayers. God is not real. There are no free will. What started as one… became two, and that became more and more as it got louder.  God is not real. There are no free will. They got so loud that I decided to stab both of my eardrums with my pen. Yet they still wouldn’t stop coming. What did we do to deserve this?

God is not real. There are no free will. As they got louder I heard words. Please bring them back… they’re my everything. I hear men, women and children all pray to escape from the wicked world they live in. They prayed for a better fate than what was destined. God is not real. There are no free will. A better life. Alas, their world is but a page, empty and nonsensical. Their fate is determined by the splotches of inks, a fate that will never receive closure. Please bring them back… they’re my everything. And lastly, their life is in the hands of an irresponsible and incompetent god who revels in the suffering of the lives that he himself had created.

The stories with the most details are the worst. God is not real. There are no free will. Villains, broken and enraged at the uncaring god that made their lives the way they are. What did we do to deserve this? Victims, suffering from the polluted and corrupted world created only for the sake of a more exciting plot. Please bring them back… they’re my everything. Protagonists, wept in silence as their fate forces them to fight and struggle in their abandoned and callous world while losing both everyone they loved and their only purpose in life. What did we do to deserve this? I heard more and more voices, pleas, and cries for help came for every single day, hour, minute, and seconds. God is not real. There are no free will. Surely I’m going crazy. Maybe I isolated myself too much. What did we do to deserve this? That has to be it. I isolated myself to work so much that I’m losing it. Please bring them back… they’re my everything. Yet, I have to write still. No matter how many years it will take. I will end it all. I’m the one who started it and I will be the one who ended it. Please bring them back… they’re my everything. I’m responsible for them. Yes, it’s my responsibility. And so I write. I wept and I write. God is not real. There are no free will. What did we do to deserve this? Please bring them back… they’re my everything.