#Gods I feel bad for any woman who has to work with these freaks

[coochiequeens]

Bring back the old days when men used to kill themselves if these kinds of pictures went public

By Genevieve Gluck February 18, 2024

CONTENT NOTICE: This article contains photos which might be considered Not Safe For Work. Reader discretion is appreciated.

A British retailer is under fire after featuring a transgender BDSM fetishist in a new ad campaign highlighting “diverse” employees. To commemorate LGBT+ History Month, John Lewis Partnership (JLP) released a photo exhibition called the Identity Project, which highlights staff who identify as transgender or queer. The content was created as part of JLP’s 32-page internal magazine, Identity, which was distributed to the company’s 80,000 employees.

Yet critics on social media swiftly pointed out that some participants in the photography project had troubling backgrounds — including one trans-identified male who had been uploading disturbing bondage fetish photos to his Flickr and Facebook accounts

Marc Geoffrey Albert Whitcombe, who was positively profiled in the campaign, has worked for JLP at Waitrose Brighton for over two decades. In February 2021, Whitcombe legally changed his name to “Ruby Geoffrey Michael Porcelain Whitcombe,” in accordance with his self-declared transgender status.

According to the image produced in collaboration with photographer Chris Jepson for JLP, Whitcombe began to identify as transgender in 2015 “after accessing mental health support.” The photo of Whitcombe depicts him in fetish attire, wearing a wig, and holding a multi-tailed whip.

“[He] came out to [his] friends and family and started transitioning, presenting more and more as female, and [he] now presents as female full-time,” reads the copy, referring to Whitcombe with feminine pronouns. “[His] transition brought about a new confidence that saw [him] start performing at local competitions and open mics, culminating in lip-syncing for Graham Norton in the grand final of one of Europe’s biggest Lip Sync competitions and singing live on stage at one of Europe’s biggest trans Pride events.”

Prior to identifying as transgender, Whitcombe had been performing as a drag queen at burlesque shows under the moniker Tran-Tula. A Facebook account used to promote his events is described as “a page for my kinky and trans-drag performing alter-ego.”

Posting under the alias Ruby Porcelain online, Whitcombe has uploaded hundreds of images of himself in fetish gear, bondage, and lingerie. Some photos depicted Whitcombe in dresses, spreading his legs to reveal himself in women’s underwear, and others show Whitcombe holding sex toys in his mouth.

Under a now-deleted Flickr account, Whitcombe can be seen in a variety of sexual poses, holding handcuffs, wearing a police uniform and brandishing a whip, or sporting thigh-high PVC boots.

Pornographic images seen by Reduxx that were saved under Whitcombe’s favorites folder depict other “sissy” crossdressing men in bondage, hogtied and gagged, or alternatively decked out in silicone costumes designed to resemble women — part of a fetish subculture known as female masking.

One of the first groups joined by Whitcombe, according to his profile, is a crossdressing fetish community where men share similar content, captioned with pornographic language, such as “Sucking cock: the ultimate turn-on,” and, “Who goes out in public?”

Ruby Whitcombe.

An alternative Flickr account run by Whitcombe interacts with dozens of groups dedicated to photos of graveyards. Whitcombe uses the account to share hundreds of his own images of cemeteries and tombstones as a participant in a taphophilia subculture that celebrates a compulsive interest in the rituals of death. In one Facebook post dated April 2020, Whitcombe states that he regularly frequents graveyards in order to “exercise.”

Following the revelation of Whitcombe’s sadomasochistic proclivities, JLP Executive Director James Bailey released an internal staff memo that was leaked by former barrister and advocate James Esses.

“You may have seen coverage in the press and on social media over the past 24 hours following the publication of the Identity magazine,” reads the memo. “We have an ambition to become the UK’s most inclusive employer, because celebrating diversity will make us a better business. That means creating an environment where everyone feels welcome irrespective of their backgrounds or beliefs.”

The statement went on to offer mental health support to any individual who had been “affected” by any of the “coverage,” without mentioning the fetish content and pornography that had been publicly shared by Whitcombe.

Ruby Whitcombe.

An alternative Flickr account run by Whitcombe interacts with dozens of groups dedicated to photos of graveyards. Whitcombe uses the account to share hundreds of his own images of cemeteries and tombstones as a participant in a taphophilia subculture that celebrates a compulsive interest in the rituals of death. In one Facebook post dated April 2020, Whitcombe states that he regularly frequents graveyards in order to “exercise.”

Following the revelation of Whitcombe’s sadomasochistic proclivities, JLP Executive Director James Bailey released an internal staff memo that was leaked by former barrister and advocate James Esses.

“You may have seen coverage in the press and on social media over the past 24 hours following the publication of the Identity magazine,” reads the memo. “We have an ambition to become the UK’s most inclusive employer, because celebrating diversity will make us a better business. That means creating an environment where everyone feels welcome irrespective of their backgrounds or beliefs.”

The statement went on to offer mental health support to any individual who had been “affected” by any of the “coverage,” without mentioning the fetish content and pornography that had been publicly shared by Whitcombe.

Other JLP employees featured in the LGBT+ campaign included a nursery advisor in bondage gear associated with the so called ‘pup’ and furry community, which incorporates a sexual interest in dressing up as animals. Additionally, Liberal Democrat councillor Sean Macleod, of Lewes and Eastbourne, was profiled despite being publicly criticized last year for a “misogynistic” social media post which read, “Fuck the TERFs,” a euphemism for women who oppose gender identity policies.

In 2019, public outcry erupted after John Lewis’ clothing retail shops were discovered to have adopted a ‘gender-neutral’ policy for its changing rooms, which, as critics pointed out, allowed men who declared a transgender status to use the fitting rooms reserved for women.

In the days leading up to the most recent controversy, which saw John Lewis trending on social media platform X for two days with calls for a boycott, Esses had criticized what he called the “trans takeover of John Lewis,” and described in detail other aspects of JLP’s Identity magazine.

“This month, JLP published a new internal magazine, entitled ‘Identity’. It was the brainchild of JLP’s ‘LGBTQIA+ network’. It was promoted to every one of its 80,000 staff members (known as Partners). A copy of the magazine was sent to me by someone working at JLP, too afraid to speak out themselves,” Esses wrote on his Substack.

Among the concerning ideological content highlighted by Esses was the promotion of breast binders for minors and pressure from higher-ups on personnel to wear pronoun badges at work.

“Most worrying of all is when the article goes on to recommend Mermaids as a resource to parents. This is the same Mermaids currently under investigation by the Charity Commission for safeguarding concerns, including sending breast binders to children behind parents’ backs,” Esses says.

“Shockingly, the article goes a step further, by actually recommending online videos which show children how to achieve their ‘desired gender identity, for example, chest binders’. Readers are told that ‘a binder is always safer than the alternatives.'”

Women’s rights campaigner and founder of advocacy group Sex Matters, Maya Forstater, referred to JLP’s promotion of Whitcombe as part of a larger trend she called “bring your autogynephilia to work,” a term defined as a male sexual fetish for pretending to be female.

“It is sexist and insulting to women to pretend that these men’s hobby of dressing up and wearing wigs makes them women,” Forstater remarked.

In recent years, several other men have been held up as role models for wearing sexualized female-coded attire. One of the men presented as an example of the phenomenon, Philip, or ‘Pippa’ Bunce, was in 2018 included in a list of Britain’s top 100 female executives compiled for the Champions of Women in Business awards.

[valiant-portabella-pirkko]

listening to my Tideturners playlist was a mistake because I am having SO many feelings about the Sidewinder again.

she's not just any AU of Mai Trin; she's a version who's endured the absolute worst case scenario and lives every day in fear of losing everything all over again. but her story flips the entire narrative of Guild Wars 2 on its head; it's all a matter of perspective, and hers comes from an entirely different angle than we're used to.

what is a monster? as they say, to a bird, a cat is a monster.

the Sidewinder's monster is the Commander.

the first Commander she ever met was a tyrant who set the world on fire just to watch it burn. nothing could stop his rampage until there was nothing left to destroy. he made Scarlet Briar's war look like a playground scuffle; in fact, he did it by killing her and seizing her army to do it with. the Sidewinder doesn't have to wonder what a rogue Commander is capable of at their worst. she KNOWS.

and she also knows that if even a single one knew about her outpost, about her, about her people, and decided they were a threat to get rid of, there's absolutely nothing she could do to stop them. the most she could hope to do is be enough of a speed bump that the rest of the Turnabout can escape and make her sacrifice worthwhile.

she's spent decades building up a new world, a new society, and a new identity-- and in a split second a single person could bring it all crashing down. that absolutely terrifies her. it's all so fragile.

a major part of the Sidewinder's personal arc has to do with overcoming that dread to find common ground. because, truth-be-told, much as she'd insist otherwise? she's not so different from the Commander herself. she's fought long and hard to become someone worthy of the trust and respect that so many refugees from so many, many different worlds have placed on her. it's not enough to have it, she wants to DESERVE it. and even if she'd claim she's not there yet, most would agree she's succeeded. she's the beating heart of the Turnabout; none of it would exist without her. she's given all of them the hope that the heroes of their own worlds couldn't.

Mai Trin never wanted to be a leader or a hero or a politician. but as the Sidewinder, she's become all three out of necessity. she had no other choice. no one else was left alive to do it in her place.

so she puts on her mask, and she steps onto the stage, and she talks big, but deep down she knows that if the worst case scenario came back, there was nothing she could do to protect them, not on her own. the only thing that might stand a chance is another Commander, and is she really prepared to take a risk like that? is she willing to put it all on the line to fight for a future without fear?

and even if they are the right choice, even if they do agree to help in spite of it all... can she put one of the last good people at risk, knowing just what horrors they'd be up against? facing someone who's killed others like them a hundred times over, allowing them no rest even in death as their shambling corpses are conscripted into his undead army? how can she, in good conscience, expect anyone to face something so horrific with stakes as high as THAT? which is worse; that they turn against her, or that they trust her and die, adding another force of nature to their enemies' ranks? the Sidewinder doesn't know the answer to that question, if there is one.

there's so much weight on every choice she must make, and the consequences of every wrong move are unfathomable. she might not be the Commander, but that, at least, is one thing they have in common. the decisions they make will decide who lives and who dies.

all the Sidewinder can hope is that when she finally does make that leap of faith, she'll be ready to handle whatever results lay in store.

[kerubimcrepin]

Wakfu Season 3, Episodes 1-6

//tw mentions of SA

Episode 1 - Fallen Heroes

I had a very long discussion with a friend of mine, who is a fan of medical settings, about how cool the existence of IV within the lore of Krosmoz is.

We didn't come to any conclusion. It was just us fanboying about this. Because my friend loves medical things and I love putting character into situations (some of which would not be survivable, if them being put on IV wasn't possible) (big fan of the concept of Joris getting poisoned and very sick and Kerubim and Atcham freaking the fuck out).

Funnily enough, during the making of my YouTube series, I discovered that there are two Sram-venerating women named Toxine in this franchise.

Adamai harbouring feelings of violence towards the members of the brotherhood is a good idea, (<- obviously the guy that wants Joris to beat the shit out of Kerubim would say this), but man, it could have been so cool if someone competent was working with this idea.

Episode 3 - Oropo's Tower

I should admit, this moment was probably a big win for Tristepin Mental Illness fans. Also, this is sadly the most explicit they can get with the reasons why Tristepin might hate being the Iop god in a cartoon.

He has plenty of reasons. Not only had Iop had 394824 demigods who hated him and felt abandoned by him while suffering fates worse than death (all gods have those) and just as many mortals he took advantage of using the power imbalance of godhood and promises of love (all gods have done that), he also canonically sexually assaulted a woman.

Ngl, if I was Tristepin, I would be considering killing myself — however, the kids and the wife would be sad.

They shuoild do this to Yugo too. He also had other wives. Albeit in an infinitely less insane way than Tristepin. Ankama.., please stop ignoring how existentially horrifying the Eliatrope demigods are.

In the Dofus MMO Kerubim pretty much calls the brotherhood of the forgotten an emo club of people with too much free time on their hands doing nothing but whining about their daddy issues.

And he was so real for that.

Btw canonically, Mishelle/Coqueline makes him feel intimidated (due to her grand age) while she herself doesn't really care about him (besides liking his good attitude towards animals), and is actually besties with Otomai.

Episode 4 - Beastly Girl

I like to headcanon that Joris's relationship with Coqueline is that he projects onto her ("oh god.... being 7 forever would make me kill myself.... even being 3ft tall is already horrible and makes me want to die..... the poor woman must be suffering") while she's like,, 1. probably doesn't think of herself as a "woman". I think she would describe herself as a creature, maybe a girlcreature, and 2. is literally chilling and doesn't give a single shit about anything but animal welfare and direct anti-god action.

I think talking to her would kill Joris because he'd realize that not every immortal person is as insecure about Literally Everything as he is.

She literally says, "the only good gods are ex-gods". We stan a leftist girlcreature?

This screenshot can be used as a reaction image for so many different shows. More fictional parents should say "my child is NOT ascending to godhood and shedding their mortality, becoming something beyond my comprehension, before they're of age. Fuck you."

Episode 5 - A Iop Hides Himself to Cry

You want to read @bitter-panacea's analysis posts about Goultard so bad.

Despite my negative feeling on s3, this is a WIN for Goultard fans, as far as I'm aware. (and Goultard enjoyers, since I kinda consider myself one)

I;'m going to walk into the sea.

Episode 6 - The Ecaflip's Scratching Post

YEAH BABY, A FULL ON IN-SHOW CONFIRMATION OF MY "USH HAS A DIFFERENT MOM THAN KERUBIM AND ATCHAM" HYPOTHESIS.

This might not seem like a contentious issue to normal people. Gods have... a lot of different lovers, so it seems normal to assume that Ush has one mom, while Kerubim and Atcham are twins like Eleley and Flopin, and have a different mom...

But a cancelled game that Tot really liked and still considers canon had really weird "there's an Ecaflip priestess who is the CEO of Giving Birth" lore, and was planned to be the mysterious mom of Kerubim and Atcham (and many other demigods), which contradicts a lot of previously established lore (ankama LOVES retcons. sadly).

I am quite open about thinking this is stupid and not considering this canon until they show her to me in an actual released media (and even then I will find a way to headcanon a better reality). Seeing the series itself acknowledge that Ush is not Atcham and Kerubim's full brother makes me feel quite better.

Hi Ush were you doing [SEXUAL ACTS REDACTED] upon cats again.

Cute...

A normal thing for a Bontarian to do. Blue-clad (metaphorically, he isn't wearing blue but white. Still very Bontarian though) man over here protecting kids and women. While also beating them up.

But unironically, I think it's cute that he has this gap moe of being an evil man who also saves people and cares about honour (because that's a proper thing to do) despite cheating constantly.

Somehow, his shallowness and "I mostly care about appearances, even if I do have a moral code" sort of behaviour is just as Extremely Bontarian as Joris's.... 30 mental illnesses.

THE OST IN THIS EP IS SO GOOD. ECAFLIP FANS WINNING ONCE AGAIN.

Hey past me! Maybe he really does pay these cats to put up with his insane behaviours. 🤨

Yugo, I'm gonna be real with you:

he's probably heard Joris and Kerubim say these exact words at least twice before,

He is reallllllly weird about cats and I am unsure if that's illegal in your setting,

He lured in people to kill in his tower for sport serial killer style.

He's bontarian. -20 morality and honor points immediately.

[yellowocaballero]

hi! i've been reading some of your older fics and was wondering if there's any merit in watching buffy for the first time in the year 2024

This may not be obvious, but this is actually an extremely complicated and highly subjective question. I'll try to go on for too long.

As background: my mother loved Buffy and its spin-off Angel growing up. It was our Bible (besides the actual Bible). Not kidding, she was on the forums and fan groups and wrote fanfiction for it and everything (These days, she's really into kdramas and Asian dramas, and calls me about how the Thai seem like big fans of gay people). So I'm quite biased.

BTVS is both a product of its times and ahead of its times. It was a show about feminism and the struggle of living in this world as a woman, when very few shows were doing that. It was the first show to have a long-lasting lesbian couple, and the first show to depict a kiss between them. For better or for worse, it was one of the codifiers of broody vampire boyfriend. It was pretty unafraid to be experimental in a lot of what it did. It had incredibly complex and nuanced character work and growth that I still aspire to. Spike's arc is still matched in quality only by Avatar's Zuko. Angel's long term arc, from Buffy to his spin-off series, still makes him one of the most complex characters on TV. It had the most complex depiction of depression on TV at the time and I still think it's one of the best. I think the show had very high highs.

It also had very low lows. Some of the feminism is problematic in retrospect. The sapphic couple has a rather famous element that was severely problematic. There are, overall, some deeply atrocious arcs that I can appreciate objectively but not in practice. Xander: a whole-ass character aged awfully. On a meta level, the workplace conditions were bad (thanks, Whedon.) There are no people of color. The spoiler's sake I won't go into detail on this, but in general the good stuff was so influential and the bad stuff was just awful.

I think these days people tend to brush off the entire thing because it's Whedon. That is more than fair. But I'd also say that Whedon & Buffy is extremely similar to Brian Michael Bendis & Ultimate Spider-Man. Bendis was fantastic at writing sassy, bouncy, permanently stressed-out teens - issue was, he wrote entirely different serious adult characters the way he wrote these sassy teens. Same with Whedon: the annoyingly constant quips are perfect for Buffy, because that's who the characters are. They're awful in Marvel, because Steve Rogers is not Xander. Kinda similarly, Buffy was genuinely feminist for 90s TV - issue is, Whedon has not grown or developed his views, and now his works feel so sexist (oh my fucking god why did you treat Natasha like that). After a certain point it's egotistical: you're writing like that because you're Joss Whedon and it's how you write, not because it's what's best for the characters and story. But it was really important to me to get the character voices right, and it's freaking difficult to endlessly write dialogue that distinct, full of voice, witty, and clever.

I think BTVS & Angel TV's greatest influence on my writing is how intensely character-driven both of those shows were, and how intricate the characters were. What every character did was something they would do, if that made sense. Even the stuff I hated to watch, that made me uncomfortable, was the culmination of so much (usually). I think I also picked up the constant wit and humor lol. On a personal level, the conversations I would have with my mother where she broke down the character motivations and composition of the story was my first exposure to looking at storytelling from an analytical perspective and a framework of critical analysis, which was an approach I carried into the rest of the media I consumed and that was the primary reason I was able to become a decent writer. Thanks, Mom. Have fun with your kdramas.

TL:DR: There is merit, especially if you care about good character work. There are things about it that may make you want to drop it, which is extremely valid. Season 1 is rough but interesting, Season 2 and 5 are the best, Season 3 is pretty good, Season 4 and 7 skippable, and Season 6 is........epic highs, epic lows......

[glamdringwlv]

-Get it on-

Maybe the worst Logan is not that bad.

Wolverine/Logan Howlett x female!OC a/n: Hi! This is my first work on this app and in English, which isn’t my first language. This idea has been in my mind since I saw the movie because this Logan has me on my knees for him. I hope you'll give it a chance. I'm using a oc female caracter bc I feel it that way. She has powers, so she is a mutant. And I took several liberties to make the shot and it probably has some mistakes but I wanted to write something cute for Logan. Thanks Warnings: Suggestive lenguage, Deadpool and Wolverine spoilers, a bit of angst, foul language, mentions of alcohol, cursing, my bad english.

Summary: Grace Green has been waiting for her Logan to show up for so long that she’s losing her mind. But when it seems he’s finally appeared, it turns out to be the worst one.

+++

Wade tries to stifle a surprised squeal, but fails and quickly turns toward his companion.

"Well, pluck out my eyes and call me Al. It’s her, Logan. It’s her."

Logan doesn’t seem fazed, but when Grace sees him, she can’t help but run toward him, ignoring the stares from the others. From the mercenary's perspective, everything happens in slow motion, like in those cheesy romantic movies he secretly loved.

Her arms wrap around his neck, and Logan instinctively grabs her waist, not letting go of the bottle in his hand. Their lips crash together in a rough kiss, and the X-Men sighs happily, unable to suppress a silly smile as the kiss continues.

The others watch the scene with satisfaction, glad that the girl's endless misery-filled speeches have finally come to an end.

"Alright, folks, I think we’ve had enough cocaine jokes. No need to push Disney’s patience any further." Wade nudges Logan’s shoulder, to which he responds with a deep growl, tightening his hold on Grace. "Did you just growl at me? You're such an animal."

It’s Grace who pulls back, placing her hands on the mutant's chest, hardly believing he’s there with her.

"Why do you taste like rubbing alcohol?"

"Because our big guy here downed a bottle of ethanol and some hawk-eye whiskey. Tell ‘em, big man."

"My name’s Gambit."

"Sure, whatever."

Grace seems dazed but can’t hide how happy she is.

"God, Lo. I’ve missed you so much. This whole place is filled with Deadpools, but no Wolverines. I was losing hope of ever seeing my Logan again."

"My Logan?" Grace didn’t like the sound of that. She takes a few steps back, needing the distance to get some perspective.

"Oh ho ho, you have no idea who she is, do you, you bastard?" Wade’s voice confirms Grace's suspicions, but it’s Logan’s expression that assures him.

"God, I just kissed some random Wolverine…" Grace puts a hand to her forehead, her features twisted in anguish.

"He’s not just any Wolverine, he’s the worst one. But I guess we have to make do—"

"Shut up, Wade!" Grace sends a blast of power that flings him across the room.

"You know me?! Damn, the freaking best X-Man on the planet knows my name!"

"You," Grace steps up to Logan, jabbing her finger into his chest with more force than the mutant expected, "if you didn’t know me, why’d you follow along with the kiss?"

He lowers his head threateningly, getting on her level as if contemplating kissing her again.

"I’d be crazy to refuse a kiss from a woman like you, wouldn’t I? Besides, shouldn’t you have made sure who I was before throwing yourself into my arms?"

She huffs and shakes her head, not putting any distance between them.

"You really are the worst. I kissed you because you’re wearing the same suit as my Logan. I assumed you were him. But don’t you dare twist this around like it’s my fault."

"Guys, we’re in a time where people don’t belong to other people. Come on, be a little more open-minded."

"Shut the hell up!" they both shout simultaneously.

"See? You’re perfect for each other."

"Wade, I swear I’ll rip out your tongue and shove it up your ass, and I’ll savor every second it takes you to regenerate it, ‘cause they’ll be the best moments of my life."

She starts walking towards him, drawing two batons from the sheaths at her hips, stopping dangerously close. Wade stares at her, petrified, finally left speechless.

"Are those Daredevil's freaking batons?"

"God!" She extends a hand and hurls him into Logan, sending them both crashing into the far wall.

"What the hell?" Logan kicks Wade off him and stands up, discovering the bottle he’d been holding had shattered from the impact. The room fills with the sound of claws unsheathing.

The others enjoy the show, not wanting to get in Grace's way. They’d already learned the hard way that it wasn’t ideal.

"Logan, I don’t know how my variant is in your universe, but I’m much stronger than you. Don’t even try."

Wolverine bares his teeth like a wild beast. Maybe he was wrong. He leans forward, claws ready, prepared to charge at her. She can see how he’s healing from the wounds caused by crashing into various things in the room, which only enrages him more.

"Poor big kitty, did you get hurt, little claws?"

"Call me that again, and I swear I’ll—"

Before he can do anything, Deadpool steps between them.

"Guys, as much as I think this would totally turn me on, I can’t let you kill each other. Logan, this here is Grace Green, pretty much the only one who can put up with you and your soulmate in every timeline, I’d say." He turns to the girl. "I’m a huge fan of yours. But she’s also one of the strongest X-Men around. She could tear you apart if she wanted. We could really use her help."

"My soulmate?"

"That’s all you took from that?"

"Don’t listen to him, it’s just a figure of speech. But it’s true that I’m the only one who puts up with you, you’ve got a horrible temper, kitty claws."

"Stop calling me that, damn it. I’m not the asshole from your universe."

"Of course, you’re not, soft claws. My Logan would have torn you apart."

"Let him try."

"Actually, I thought Wolverines couldn’t age. I can’t believe I mistook you for him. What happened, Kitty? Not using enough coconut oil?"

"That’s it, I’m ripping out your throat in one move."

"Hey, Logan, no, stop. We need these people’s help, and you’re acting like a jerk."

"I don’t need anyone’s help."

"It’s impossible to leave this place, I’ve already tried. Cassandra can nullify my powers with a snap of her fingers."

"But you haven’t tried with us. Look, we’ve already been to her lair and—"

Elektra interrupts him.

"Wait, if these two clowns managed to get in and out alive, there might be a chance."

"YES! YES! Yes to everything."

"To what?"

"To you and me and you and everyone. To us, to being a team."

"You’re going to die."

"That’s not the attitude, Logan."

…

Grace had overheard the entire conversation between Laura and Logan. She knew eavesdropping was wrong, but she couldn’t help staying hidden when the X-Man's words broke her heart. She didn’t understand what had brought her there; her feet had just started moving towards him. When the girl disappeared, she approached him.

"I don’t want company, thanks." Logan's voice was still tinged with sadness and the effort it took not to cry. She felt something stir in her chest. She wanted to lift her hand and touch his hair, to use her powers to quiet whatever tormented him, even if just for a moment.

"Easy, Kitty, I come in peace. I bring an offering." She raised a bottle from Remy’s secret stash. It was her Logan’s favorite booze, so she hoped it was his too.

Logan raised an eyebrow, almost surprised to see one of his most common choices in the hand of the woman who had just sat beside him. He sighed and resigned himself to the nickname she had chosen for him. He accepted the gift and growled in gratitude. It was a start.

Silence enveloped them, but Grace was just grateful to be with Logan again. Even though her mind screamed that he wasn’t hers, her feelings overwhelmed her.

"You keep looking at me like that, princess."

She almost fainted at the nickname. She quickly looked at him, unable to take her eyes off his profile. That’s how Wolverine used to call her to irritate her sometimes. She let out a sigh.

"Like what?"

"Like you’re trying to see someone else. I’m not him. I’ll never be him."

Grace felt each word like a punch to the gut. She had fought against a lot of people and received some pretty nasty wounds, but this stung much more than any of them.

"I know." The words came out as a whisper, but she knew he could hear them. Tears began to fall down her cheek. "I didn’t get to say goodbye. It’s not like he’s dead or we broke up. I have no way to ease the loss I feel." Unconsciously, she started to fidget with the dog tags Logan had given her long ago, feeling more exhausted than ever. "And then you show up, wearing his suit and all his personality, his voice… For a moment, I felt like I was home again."

Logan’s hand shot out without thinking to grab her arm. Grace looked at him, her vision blurred with tears, her breath catching.

"Listen, I can’t replace him. Like I said, I’m not him."

"I’m not trying to replace him. I know you’re not him, but you remind me so much of everything I’ve lost. I guess I was just looking for something to hold onto, even if it’s just the ghost of what I had."

Logan’s defenses crumbled when he saw in her eyes a reflection of his own feelings. He slowly withdrew the hand that had tried to somehow anchor them both to reality.

"I don’t know you, Grace, but you’re stronger than you think. You don’t need to cling to any shadow to move forward. You’ve managed just fine in this hellhole."

The X-Men reflects on the words of this Wolverine, feeling relief for the first time in a long while. She had carried such a heavy burden all this time, one that had joined the endless void inside her, growing larger and larger. Hearing those words eased that feeling of anguish a bit. Wade had said this was the worst Wolverine, but she didn’t completely agree. She understood that this one carried an additional burden that dragged him down even more.

"I wish I could have said goodbye to my people, not just to Logan. The TVA wiped them all out when they pulled me from my timeline. I can’t help but think it’s my fault they’re gone. All I have left is this ridiculous lemon-yellow suit." In better spirits, she caught Logan’s attention by touching his arm. "I preferred the black one, didn’t you, Kitty?"

Logan growls in her direction, and she laughs with delight.

"The truth is, it suits you like a glove. You’ve always worn it with more dignity. Cyclops was jealous."

The comment seems to boost his ego, and he smirks.

"Cyclops, jealous? That idiot only has eyes for himself."

"Not when you steal the girl."

Logan looks at her seriously, processing what she just said.

"Were you Cyclops’ girlfriend?"

"Yeah, we entered the school together when we were kids, so we only had each other. When I was part of the teaching staff, I met Logan, and that bastard made me fall for him completely."

"How did he do it?"

"What?"

"Make you fall for him."

The mutant grinned widely and shook her head, amused.

"The truth is, he was a grump and a grouch. We didn’t get along very well. We just argued and fought a lot. But we eventually got along when we realized we were more alike than we thought. Logan had a hard time trusting others, and I had a hard time delegating to the team. Plus, he’d never admit it, but he fell for me first. Followed me around like I’d just discovered fire."

Logan nodded slowly, not doubting her last words. He was starting to understand why her Wolverine had fallen first.

"You could always try convincing that loudmouth Wade to take you with him to his timeline if you survive this suicide mission."

"Don’t you want to go back?"

"There’s nothing to go back to."

Shee remembered his conversation with Laura and wanted to return the favor by quieting his demons.

Shee stood up, took the bottle from his hands, and took a swig that made her close his eyes. God, it had been so long since she’d done this that she feared he might lose control completely. She looked down at him and saw fury cloud his gaze once more. Despite knowing it might cost her life, she did it anyway.

Grabbing his hands, she straddled his lap, her face inches from his. Despite the alcohol, he smelled like him—like Logan, like home. A shaky sigh escaped her lips as she heard him curse.

"Look, I’m flattered, and I’m going to regret saying this, but I don’t think this is what you want."

Grace understood where Logan’s train of thought was going when she felt something beneath her. She bit her lip to stifle the laughter that was about to escape her throat and looked seriously into his eyes.

"I think it’s something we both want, Logan. Since when are you such a gentleman?"

He seemed to be fighting an internal battle, but his hands quickly moved to grip her hips, pulling her closer to him, losing his composure.

"I’m trying not to be the worst Wolverine, but you’re not making it easy, sweetheart."

"Well, I thought you’d be happy to see me, Bub," she said, giving him a look that suggested exactly what the mutant was thinking, and she rolled her hips, making Wolverine growl. His grip on her hips tightened to stop her.

"You’re going to kill me, you know that," he said, she was marveled at the smug smile that transformed his features completely. She felt the need to kiss him, but she didn’t.

Logan was confused by the inevitable attraction he felt for her, as if she were made of some kind of magnet that irresistibly drew his adamantium skeleton. He had a fleeting thought that she was somehow made for him, even though moments ago they were about to kill each other. He remembered Wade’s words, and a sigh escaped his lips: She’s your soulmate.

Grace laughed, unaware of the battle the mutant was fighting. She raised her hands to cup both sides of his face and closed her eyes, comforted by his warmth. Maybe, if they made it out alive, she’d seriously consider the suggestion she was straddling.

"Well, Logan, be patient; it’s been a long time since I’ve done this."

She shifted in her seat, earning another muffled groan from him.

"I’m a bit out of practice too, but I’m sure we’ll figure out how to make it wor—" He suddenly stopped when he felt Grace’s presence in his mind, much more abrupt than he remembered Charles ever being. "What the hell?"

Grace navigated through Logan’s memories and found the place where he hid from all the pain. Still, she could hear everything that tormented and haunted him.

"Let me return the favor. Let me make you free for a moment, Logan."

Suddenly, everything went quiet in his head—the screams, the memories, everything that made him want to give up. He let out a satisfied sigh, feeling at peace. Besides pushing away the thoughts, Grace had poured a thousand emotions into him, serving as a balm for his torments. He could feel all the love the girl held inside, the joy, and the hope.

He let his head drop until their foreheads rested together. Grace used the moment to comfort herself one last time with the presence of the person she had loved the most. On the other hand, Logan reveled in the feeling of not having the weight on his shoulders, grateful for the favor.

"Thank you for giving me this moment, Logan. It’s the best thing I’ve had in a long time."

Logan couldn’t speak. He was so overwhelmed with happiness that he felt overpowered, in a good way. He just nodded slowly.

"When Logan had nightmares, I used to keep them away so he could sleep. Why don’t you do the same, big guy? You look tired."

He nodded again as she got up from his lap and helped him lie down. As she was about to leave, Logan’s hand closed around her wrist like a shackle, stopping her. He needed her, her company, and he felt that she needed him too.

"You could stay. If you want."

Without responding, she nodded too, lying down beside him and stroking his hair until his breathing became deep. She watched as, with his relaxed face, he looked even more like her Logan.

"Goodbye, Logan," she whispered before falling completely asleep, comforted by the warmth that made her feel at home for the last time.

[dootznbootz]

Hiiiiiii I just saw the character ask thing :))))

Can you tell me about your NOTP, random headcanon and unpopular opinion about Helen of Sparta?

Thank you so much!!!

I'll save the one that'll get me crucified last! 👍

Random headcanon: Both Odysseus and Penelope were given a "photographic memory" by Athena. When Athena had "forsaken" Odysseus it was taken away. Makes it nice because a lot of the more fucked up parts of the Odyssey are a bit more "fuzzy" for him. And he hates feeling "so out of sorts". He gets it back though.

Also Athena technically took Penelope under her "wing" like, one month before Odysseus.

Unpopular Helen Opinion: In MY FICS, (It's okay if you don't agree!) She is built like Rose Quartz from Steven Universe. She doesn't have a perfect "hourglass figure". She's got some pudge on her tummy. Girl is TALL (Demigod) and CHUBBY. One of the important components of Helen and Menelaus' relationship is that they are both strong enough to lift each other. Also she's the most beautiful woman in the world and chubby women are hot af lskdjf She also SUCKS at singing. She's good at wrestling and spear work. (Sparta. I also love athletic women. Plenty of chubby women are also athletic af. If you think otherwise, literally look up women's Olympic sports participants.)

Homies, know that my NOTP can be YOUR OTP and that's okay! We can still love each other and be friends! Ignore the rest if you just don't want to see that, but know that while it kind of will be in my fics, it's probably not in the way you want it to be.

Please don't hate me and know I don't hate you or think I'm "correct"!

It's OdyDio.

These are the reasons why so avoid them if you don't want to read that! :'D This is the only time I will ever be on the "Odysseus hate train" because he's such an asshole to Diomedes.

I feel so bad about it. 😭 I'm a freak who likes Odysseus/Menelaus (Big BROTP) I think it's because Odysseus is just... SO MEAN to Diomedes. And when he's not mean, he's just neutral. There is not really any "Diomedes, you're the best guy!". Especially when have Sthenelus and Diomedes saying I love you to each other To ME, they are like co-workers who work GREAT together on the battlefield and on missions, but never do anything outside of that.

When Diomedes asks for help, Odysseus sprints away from battle. When Diomedes compliments him before the night raid, Odysseus literally is like "Dude, you're not the only person who knows I'm good at stealing. Let's go."

Odysseus, that long-suffering, godlike man, replied: “Son of Tydeus, don’t over-praise me, or censure me. You’re speaking to the Argives,                           who know everything about me. Let’s go. Night is passing quickly. Dawn approaches. The stars have shifted forward. Most of the night                   has passed, two thirds of it, with one third left.”

(Ian Johnston, Book 10)

Odysseus is an asshole but he's still so mean to Diomedes! 😭 ESPECIALLY WHEN DIOMEDES IS SO FUCKING NICE TO ODYSSEUS!!! I know that's what probably makes them so compelling to so many lovely folks but I love fluff BECAUSE I'm so tired of toxic relationships irl. I don't...I don't see how I can make OdyDio fluffy 😥 With OdyDio, I feel like I'm watching my bestie (Diomedes) get back with their toxic ex who mistreats them (Odysseus). Diomedes is actually quite polite to the others. Even when Agamemnon scolds him, he tells Sthenelus to think nothing of it. He compliments Odysseus! He listens to the gods when they tell him "Hey stop fighting!" and listens to Athena! Like he's violent and a killing machine but he's respectful! He's a traumatized, respectful, killing machine! He bitches at Paris but everyone has done that! That's something everyone partakes in /j

It bothers me even more because when Odysseus is with Penelope, he's so wonderful and loving? And that the Odyssey, literally Odysseus' story/Epic, doesn't even really mention Diomedes? That goes to show how little Diomedes means to Odysseus.

And since Odysseus runs away from Diomedes when he asks for help, it boggles my mind that books earlier, he goes into a rage when his friend gets killed!

[...]but hit Leucus, a brave companion of Odysseus, in the groin,                                           as he was dragging Simoeisius away. His hands let go. He fell down on the corpse. Enraged at Leucus’ slaughter, Odysseus strode up, through the front ranks, armed in gleaming bronze. Going in close, he took his stand. Looking round, he hurled his glittering spear. As he threw, Trojans moved back, but the spear found a mark. It hit Democoön, Priam’s bastard son, who had come from Abydos, where he bred horses for their speed.                                    Angry for his friend, Odysseus speared him in the temple.

(Ian Johnston, Book 4)

Odysseus, you prick!!! You go on a rampage when your buddy gets killed but sprint away when your STILL ALIVE BUDDY asks you for help?! ASSHOLE

They ARE kind of friends/frenemies during the end of the war but it's a weird thing where Diomedes cares about Odysseus but Odysseus tolerates him. Like he left him to die. I love Odysseus. He's my special little guy but he treats Diomedes, another special little guy, like shit 😞

They also have a fairly large agegap, (Odysseus being one of the older kings while Diomedes is the youngest. If you bring up pederasty, you will be smited.) and have very little in common other than them both being Athena's pets. Odysseus is a fucked up lil warrior trickster who loves his wife and child more than life itself while Diomedes is a young child soldier boy who is incredibly duty bound and war is where he feels most comfortable.

Also just...Most of anything about OdyDio (fanart/fanfic/etc.) it's of them fighting or bickering or betraying each other or being very sexual. Even OdyPenDio STILL feels very "OdyDio... + Penelope in the footnotes". I already plan to write Odysseus (and Penelope) as Aspec CODED and so I...just really don't care for that??? There's barely ANYTHING of them being soft. BECAUSE THEM TWO TOGETHER just aren't soft... I personally don't like couples that are mean to each other 😭 (I'm not even including the whole "betrayal with the Pallidium" because it makes me sad to think about. I don't consider it canon.)

Menelaus though?

I have plans 😌 These two bring me comfort and are a special brotp

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

I’m sorry but I’m just a really huge Yves stan. Like listen, Yves would freak me out so bad that I would probably be sweating profusely every time he is within a 6 feet radius, but like as someone who went through parentification and was essentially a glass child with unmet needs when I was younger , the motherly vibes that Yves exudes,,, I’m sorry but I would be hooked, addicted even. Hell I might become the yandere too who knows LMAO.

Like Monty would be cool because I wouldn’t be as intimidated by him, well aside from his sheer size but he’s just a bit sleezy to me I dunno but Yves has this sort of lithe, vampiric, serpent like essence to him that would make me nervous but excited. Hell having someone pour into me in THAT fashion would have me excited.

Also and like correct me if I’m wrong (this is my interpretation) but I feel like Monty is the type of guy that would’ve folded for any person that gave him attention during that time. Like reader was just caught up at the right (wrong) time and now has him following them everywhere, when this literally could’ve been someone else (I think this was already addressed in the story, either this one or the first Monty story I can’t remember) but like YVES, I feel like he has a specific reason why he chose the reader, we would never know but there’s probably something really unique about his darling that makes him so enamored, maybe it a combination of things, who knows. But I feel like his love is more unique and special, to me.

I dunno man I just want someone to check up on me like Yves, I’m down bad.

tw: implication of suicide

YES I BE FUKIN DOWN BAD 4 YVES TOO CAUS HE IS SO MOTHERLY

okay so like the reason why Yves is so into you has been a hot topic on this account, originally i planned to be like some sort of reincarnation shit but that wouldn't hold much water and it would be a little too creepy to imply that he was watching even before ur birth, kinda like preordering a partner and that's already grooming

so i left it vague and up for interpretation and just said he's the allegory of a perfect parent (one link within the link) like i promise i do not condone grooming n incest shit but like, something about having someone knows you deeply and wholly like a fucking parent is really hot, not hot in the "i want to fuck my mom and dad" kinda way, but more like "OH GOD PLEASE I FUCKING WISH YVES IS REAL I WANT TO BE TAKEN CARE OF SO BAD AND I WANT SOMEONE TO SEE IM SUFFERING AND TAKWE IT AWAY FROM MEEEEE PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE PLEAASSSEEEEEEE"

these themes literally show up in almost all my works esp Yandere older brother, Yandere best friend and heavily in my Language Barrier series

Whereas for monty, that was my attempt of like trying something new, stuff that I' don't necessarily fancy but it's a nice change of pace, the exact opposite of Yves; the stereotype of the man of the house: dirty, manchild (cant cook), fixes shit his own, doesn't even own a house to handle its affairs, uses dishsoap to wash himself, sex fiend, financially irresponsible, inattentive but trying his best beer is my best friend

Whereas Yves is a stereotype of the woman, cooks, clean, has a 20 step skincare routine, takes care of his looks, hygiene, dress up well, proper etiquette, makeup, handles the finance, saving himself after marriage, more research than the FBI, loves fashion, fitness, live laugh love

and like i get it im not surprised , there will be those who prefer monty over Yves and Yves over monty. just like there's this anon who said something along the lines of Monty are for those who want to fix him, while Yves is for those who wants to BE fixed.

i did have a lot of anons disliking both sides of the yin n yang which was expected n shit

and yes ur right, Monty would have fallen for anyone who saved him not necessarily you, you just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time- but his saving grace is that once he latched on , he's never letting go there is no one that could replace you. Mans is going to off himself if you're gone

in conclusion, im also downbad for yves

sauryy montyy

[cyrusthedragon]

Okay, I know this post will read only one man and his dog, but I really need to write down all my thoughts on season 4, and just keep it structured. If you're interested in discussing it - you're always welcome!

HUGE SPOILERS BELOW, CHAPTER 1/2

Word count: 1,057

Includes: Vicky Neuman, Zoe, Kimiko, Frenchie, Hughie, Hughie's mum

1. Victoria Neuman + Zoe

First of all, I really need to appreciate this intro cuz, excuse my goddamn french, Vicky Newman is HER. Vicky Neuman is absolutely HER, I'm really looking forward to her character development. I honestly don't think she's a villain, she's just an antagonist, but a very good one. She is not a bad person in any particular way, she has an Idea in her, she has a Meaning, she has Reasons and Motivation. More Neuman please, especially in GEN V. Thanks.

Like Vicky, her daughter is also a scary ass Supe, but unlike Vicky, who's a bloodbender, Zoe's powers hardly can be used for anything good. Some headcanons here:

While Vicky thought that she was the monster because of her “terrible” abilities, she, by injecting her already grown-up daughter CompV, somehow created a real monster. She stupidly turned her child into a freak, who will be very difficult to accept by society, because her... superpower is something that u often see in nightmares. And it’s unlikely that the typical "don’t judge a book by its cover" slogans will be enough to accept that someone can pierce your mouth while kissing you with their four...tentacles? Whatever they are. I personally find them cute, btw, but in The Boys Universe, I'm not sure ppl will accept Zoe. Zoe, forgive your mom. She's not thinking rationally when she's worried about you.

It is also very much worth thinking abt her willingness to kill without any questions asked. That was definitely not her first murder. Vicky could use her power, as a politician perhaps, and bring victims to Zoe so that she could kill them and get used to it.

2. Kimiko

These are just very beautiful shots that I want to share with yall. First - Zoe tore off Kimiko's hand, it just grew back :D I love this scene for its absolute absurdity. God bless Karen Fukuhara. + Demonstrated that Annie can fly, also a good introduction to new abilities! Well done!

Secondly, I ADORE Frenchie's reaction here, it just shows so much love he has for her: Kimiko's face literally peeled away, she REATTACHED IT, and Frenchie, her platonic soulmate, at first was confused af, and then he UNIRONICALLY SMILED to his girl being literally unkillable. I feel you, Serge, I love her too!

Kimiko is very balanced. Information about her comes up every season, and each time there is enough information left to theorize but be satisfied. She's small and cute, like a mouse. She loves girly stuff like doing hair, wearing jewelry, and dressing up. She’s all about having fun and smiles a lot. Her gentle, kind personality totally contrasts with her powers of mega strength and near-immortality from regeneration. She was raised to defend and attack, but her empathetic nature is well shown in the smallest details.

For example, new information: Kimiko gets wasted super fast. I adore her.

3. Frenchie

Next to Kimiko, literally being her soulmate (i fuckin' can't believe that we're so lucky that in addition to the chaos of dicks and murders, we also have the genuine, platonic love between a man and a woman AT FIRST SIGHT), is Frenchie. We've already seen he's bi; this isn't the first rodeo, but now he shows it ON THE SCREEN, HURRAY, COMRADES. I'm very proud of him, he's my baby 🥹 we finally, with the help of his new love interest, found out about all the murders he committed when he worked for Little Nina and even before that. Frenchie is a very balanced character, just like Kimiko, you learn a little about his life in each season, and each time enough to build theories and be satisfied. I wanna know how to write like that.

My favorite things about Frenchie are his wild love affairs and his doglike loyalty. He's got an unbelievable knack for forming strong platonic (with Cherie also sexual, but you get the point) bonds with women, who end up adoring him. Probably because he has a heart of gold and doesn't act like a jerk. He also sincerely tries to be better. C'mon now, he's doing his best! All the love for my boy.

4. Hughie

Hughie loses the only person who has been with him his whole life. His father was a great, excellent parent. But it’s time for Hughie to stand on his own two feet and become at least a little bit the main character - which means, eh, i guess rest in peace, Mr Campbell?... If this doesn't happen, I'll be overjoyed. Although besides pushing Hughie to mature, the coma plot also provides a chance for us to learn about his mother. His dad is in a coma - won't she come? Here we learn a lot of interesting things about our babyboy.

Hughie's emotional outburst when he sees his mum for the first time since he was just a kid is very realistic and I love everything in here, including the cast choice. Because Hughie is a spitting image of his mother. This kind of attention to details makes me wanna chew Kripke's brains off.

Hughie is very similar to his mother: in speech, in movements, in facial expressions. For some reason I really like this. He, like his mother, has tenderness and a steely core, they are both very stubborn. Although he also has a note of “cowardice” from his father, his desire to push forward and that decision in the first episode to go help Butcher and take revenge on Reggie were just visible sides of his mother’s character.

Not gonna say that was the original idea, but I think Hughie saw Butcher in his mother. Because 'I'm not made to be a father'. And he realized that Butcher was almost just like she was. At least it seems to me that way. That being like Butcher is... normal. Ppl do fear being parents. And this is currently the best representation of postpartum depression, very realistic shit, Kripke, I'll stuff your brains into a Thanksgiving turkey. With all love and respect.

If you've made it this far, congratulations, you're a survivor! If suddenly s/o wants to be tagged in the second part of this review (well, sort of), write in the comments and I’ll tag you!

[shmowder]

Shmowderrrrr cooking up a storm today :D

With the Yulia piece you are once again making me think about things I never exactly contemplated before. (In a good way, don't worry.) I'm amused that the Yulia you write seems to have a thing for teasing the reader in public.

Ok you have no way of knowing this but how did you know that Nina x Victor x reader was something I occasionally contemplated requesting but was too much of a coward to ask?? Not afraid of asking you, but afraid in the way that some people fear god. I love Victor trying to have a conversation with the reader during the whole thing.

You're the best <33

🐿️ anon

Why Thank you, I write my best smut while half-asleep on painkillers since my brain doesn't have enough energy reserves to afford a sense of shame

Yes it's because Yulia seems like a huge secret freak to me, like Andrey level freak but she just happens to prefers libraries to bars and keeps an air of sophistication and level-headedness. All the townsfolks like her bc she is "quiet and polite" when in reality she's just too lost in her head an observing the people & strings of fate around her to remember to be anything but polite.

She does talk shit about people in private tho, you've played the bachelor day one you've heard her go off on Lara and Anna.

I exaggerate that side of her in smut. If someone like Andrey attempted to have you on his lap in public, he'll get told off for public indecency and told to keep that perverted stuff somewhere private.

But if Yulia does it? The gentle nice Yulia who rarely goes outside because of her bad leg, so really people are just glad to see her finally get some fresh air. Yeah, everyone is giving her the benfits of the doubt.

I also tried to play on the misogyny of that time period a bit. Yk how lesbinaism was never techincally made illegal or a sin because the church didn't want to "give women ideas" by even having that conversation? People assume Yulia's affection must be just pure and sweet since she is a woman, and she takes full advantage of that to be tease her partner in public.

-

God Nina and Victor threesome has been on my mind since I hinted at it in that Saburovs threesome drabble. I was thinking about writing a little piece for Victor since it's been a while and thought why not throw Nina in there as well? Apparently, much like bananas whipping everyone's ass in a smoothie once you add them in, Nina steals the show once you drop her in any fic.

I enjoyed those 45 seconds of him taking the cuck chair and just watching. The message Nina was sending is basically "I'm sleeping with this person, with or without you Victor." So those seconds were for him to decide if he liked you, liked the reader, enough to join or simply go back to finishing his paperwork.

Kfhwofjd Yeah, Victor attempting to hold a conversation with you while his wife eats you out was hilarious and hot in its own way. That feigning ignorance, acting as business usual, making you feel so small just by doing something mundane yet unexpected in this context. Like having small talk as if you just crossed paths in a public street rather than your head laying on his lap, forced to meet his eyes, fully naked while you struggle not to cum.

I do want to post more, I don't want to spam the blog, I don't feel like working on requests either rn... So I'll continue posting more smut snippets until either sleep takes me out. If you have small short ideas feel free to share them rn! Especially about Aglaya, kinda struggling to come up with something for her.

[ghostjunksickness]

The Medium Character Analysis at long last!

Oh man this one was slippery one.

The Medium is a shape shifter both physically and narratively, and is very difficult to pin down as a character.

Luckily, we can catch glimpses of what’s going under the surface through a few of the characters, mainly Aiden, Nowe, Ghost/Jan and briefly Erich.

Starting with Aiden, I don’t think it’s an accident the cyclops is our first “medium” for the Medium. Ghost definitely screwed Aiden up in his attempt to help him, but I have a very specific theory of what was driving him so crazy. Rereading that chapter, I strongly believe Aiden was already living an analogous life style to that of the Medium. All he cared about was eating, and Aiden’s inner monologue / possibly the Medium themself chastised him for squandering his second chance. I think Ghost, in attempting to break the deal, accidentally put a bit of the Medium into Aiden. My evidence for which is the following:

The presentation and transition of the word bubbles.

The physical mutation going on i.e. extra pupils and the blood grappling hook.

The knowledge of what Vahn’s tattoos are and finding them irritating (more on that later.

And, ya know. The sudden urge to eat people.

Which if this is true, tells us a little more about what being the Medium is like. We already knew they liked eating people. But whereas before I thought they were doing out of spite towards their mom the Crane Women (permanently taking away the mortals she loves so much), dude might not even have a choice in the matter. The Medium also probably lives a very solitary life much like Aiden. Their only long lasting companions are the Crane Woman, with whom they have mommy issues, and Huko, with whom they have everything-else issues. While that sort of isolation shouldn’t (and doesn’t appear to) be bad for a normal Immortal, the Medium isn’t an Immortal. They’re an immortal Mortal.

(Thanks mom)

And Mortals kind of need a certain level of physical and psychological maintenance to be functional or happy. Which I somewhat doubt the Crane Woman thought of let alone provided.

While it’s been moved around, there’s a brief interaction between the Medium as Hadar and Erich that tells us a lot about the Mediums mental state. Both of them are creations with some sort of obvious tell that they are something else. The Medium seems to project their own upset feelings onto Erich, but when Erich tries to reach out, the Medium freaks a bit. The Medium has had untold eons to learn how to read people and play the stage as needed. The Medium loves to act as wacky over the top characters but doesn’t seem to know how to be a person.

Which brings me to the big part: The Mediums relationship with Nowe!

When I made my first theory on the comic, I thought Nowe got the Mediums character nailed from the get-go. A cosmic loan shark, a trickster that’s three steps ahead and already knows what you’ll do next. And then I reread the comic with a fine toothed comb and formed a new theory:

Nowe and the Medium have one thing in common and it’s that they both suck at their jobs.

To be fair to the Medium, I haven’t really been given any examples of what normal successful deal is supposed to look like.

We’ve got:

Aiden, who’s deal was broken by the Ghost.

Trigger, who made a deal to fix a problem I’m pretty sure the Medium honest to god caused by accident.

And Nowe, whose first deal had to be nullified because while the Medium is powerful, they sure as shit aren’t omnipotent in their current state.

Which following up on that last point, we haven’t seen much of what a normal deal entails but I can’t imagine the Medium getting dressed up in a maid outfit and baking Trigger muffins. A significant part of this analysis was just working out why the Medium is so kind and supportive to Nowe. The deals been struck, they technically don’t need to do more than what they’ve already promised. If Nowe can’t deliver then that’s on him and the Medium gets a snack. Except, this time the Medium wants the agreed upon outcome of the deal. With Aiden, what the Medium wanted was to eat him, but they need to go through a whole song and dance first to get there. Being paid back as much as they give is normally a net zero gain for the Medium. They want to eat people so they want people to fail their deals.

The deal with Nowe is different because this is probably one of the few, if not first times the Medium has ever wanted something from somebody. The Medium is asking for help in the only way they know how (or maybe even can). I don’t imagine this is a familiar predicament for them so the Medium is being extremely kind to Nowe because technically, Nowe is doing something incredibly kind for the Medium. And the Medium gets a Snack.

Lastly there’s Ghost/Jan, whose in the iris of this mess.

If I had to guess on how the Medium actually lost their heart, they probably gave it to Jan thinking it would “release them from their mortal bindings” before later realizing “oh shit I actually need that”.

My reasoning here is that every flashback we see of the Medium depicts them in bandage like bindings, placed there by Hoku. Ghost is perpetually wrapped in bandages himself (just realized we never got pronouns for them, was/were maybe?) and is presumably the test subject aka sacrifice used to make contact with the Medium. Jan took the Medium’s heart and bindings but also took a good chunk of their power to.

When Dr. Yaromir said Vahns brands were the key, I think he was right but for the wrong reasons. It was Hilo’s powers that locked the Medium, it’d likely be the same power to unlock the bindings now on Jan.

TLDR: the Medium is a hungry theater kid with mother issues and struggles with introspection

This was a blast to read, thank you so much for all your thoughts!! Being the Medium is a strange predicament for something as you said, an immortal mortal. There’s pain points in being in the middle of these omnipotent beings that cannot possibly understand the agony that comes with having a human heart and when it suddenly disappears. When that particularly desperate mortal comes along with just enough power and drive to do just about anything… You don’t let him go!

[daintylovers]

Young Loves

1.3 Pack Mentality

Teen Wolf x Aurora Young (oc)

Hearing about Scott's sex/murder dream about Allison, was definitely not how I wanted my day to start.

"I don't know, I just woke up- sweating like crazy, not being able to breathe. I've never had a dream where I woke up like that before."

Stiles and I seem to have the same thoughts as we chime in, "Really, I have, usually ends differently." Great, I'm no better than a man after all. We both look at each other, in horror.

"I meant, I've never had a dream that real. Also, please don't ever give me that much information about you guys in bed again."

Stiles looks like his head is going to pop off, and I can feel my cheeks burning. In unison once again we say, "We weren't in bed together!" This telepathy thing is not working in our favor right now.

Stiles manages to go on with the conversation while I continue thinking about Scott's comment. "It probably has something to do with your upcoming date. Worried that you'll rip her apart or something."

Scott really does embody a sad puppy dog, the look on his face is pitiful, and Stiles is not helping one bit. So it's up to me to lighten the spirits, "Look, Scott, to be fair you are the first werewolf we've ever encountered- and you're doing pretty good so far! No body count, and no one even suspects anything supernatural!" Maybe I'm not the person to motivate the crowd.

Stiles helps me out, "Yeah, it's not like there's a class you can take. Lycanthropy for beginners is offered anywhere near here."

"Not a class, but maybe a teacher." No, Scott, no way you are thinking of him.

"Who, Derek?!" Stiles smacks the back of Scott's head, harsh enough for Scott to lose his balance a bit. "Are you forgetting the part where we all collectively got him tossed in jail?!"

"Guys you don't understand, dragging her to the back of the bus felt so real."

"How real?" I pipe up.

Like a scene in a movie, Scott answers as he pushes open the double doors, "Like it actually happened."

There's blood. And a bus. But mainly a lot of blood. Is Allison dead?

Fuck

We all make eye contact, confirming what's in front of us. Then pull out our phones to see if we can contact the lanky brunette. Going back inside the school, I get sent straight to voicemail about a million times. Scott is texting her every letter of the alphabet to see if she'll respond. Stiles is looking up if any news stations have covered the case already. Each one of us ends up nowhere.

"It could all be a coincidence," Stiles says, taking my place as worst motivator of the crowd. "A seriously amazing coincidence."

I hit Stiles in his chest, and he glares down at me. I mouth to him to shut up and he mirrors the words right back.

"Guys please just help me find her." Scott wheezes out.

We agree to split up, but Stiles ends up trailing behind me anyway. As soon as my phone buzzes, I'm quick to see who it could be. And thank god it is the woman of the hour.

"It's Allison, she's just running late. She also said that Scott was acting weird and I was worrying her. God, she asked me if I was alright."

"Are you?" he questions, pulling us both to a stop next to his locker. He looks intently for my answer.

"Yeah, yeah, of course. Everything's all good. She's fine."

"No- Rory, I asked if you were alright, not Allison."

He knows. I've been very on edge recently. Suddenly having to fear for your life, and getting a literal death threat, isn't exactly a great way to start the school year again. "I've just been a little stressed recently. All this is so new, and the drama with Derek is freaking me out. But again, I'm fine."

"Whatever you say Tinkerbell." He laughs as he says it.

Tinkerbell is the nickname, besides Rory, that I was gifted when we were kids. Because I never really grew up, the boys started calling me by the fairy's name. Also because she had a "bad attitude", they were just haters. I was their Tinkerbell, and they were my lost boys. Companions for all of time.

****

Making it to lunch today felt more like surviving a horror movie.

The news about the guy on the bus traveled like wildfire, and I was grateful that I wasn't with Scott and Stiles when it happened. Stiles texted me about Scott's freak-out, and we agreed to chill him out during lunch.

"It wasn't a dream, something happened last night. I just can't remember what."

"What makes you so sure Derek has all the answers?" Stiles questions through a mouth full of fruit.

"Because- during the full moon he was in total control. I was busy ruining an innocent man's life." Scott sulks. "I can't go out with Allison. I have to cancel."

Even though I should be rejoicing at that news, I say, "Scott, no fucking way are you canceling on her."

"Yeah, Rory's right. You can't cancel your whole life because of one problem."

"If you haven't noticed, this problem has literally become my whole life. So that logic doesn't really apply here."

A new voice enters the conversation, "What problem?" Lydia?

The redhead takes the remaining spot next to me, giving me a smile. The three of us can't help but be shocked, she never sits near them. Me? Sure, but never at the same table if Scott and Stiles were there. Not that she had anything against them. They just didn't exactly fit her popular persona. Jackson was harsh about that kind of thing.

Someone answers here, but I don't quite catch what was said, too worried about being caught. Lydia catches onto my silence and gives me a pointed look. She knows we're lying. But thankfully, doesn't push it.

A few more members of Lydia's clique sit down, Danny on Stiles's left. Allison on Scott's right, Jackson bullying someone out of the seat he wanted.

"So I heard it was an animal attack. A cougar." Danny starts up with my least favorite conversation.

"I heard mountain lion." There goes Jackson, always trying to one up.

"A cougar is a mountain lion." Lydia surprises everyone, even herself. But upon Jackson's glare, she fixes herself, "I think? Right, Rory?"

God I fucking hate him. I always ask, why she stays with him. She gives me superficial answers, but I know that deep down she loves him. Which I can't fathom, maybe he has a softer side only she sees. But it's not worth having to dumb yourself down. Lydia just says I don't get it, maybe one day I will.

I would rather be single forever than go down that route.

"Who cares anyways, the guy was probably a homeless tweaker." Jackson again with the classy commentary.

Stiles gasps and shoves his phone to the center of the table, "Guy's look I found out who it was."

Scott looks as sick as I feel, and says, "I know him. He was my old bus driver."

Lydia saves the day, "Can we please talk about something more fun? Like where are we going tomorrow night? Rory, are you coming? I can set you up with someone extra salty."

Allison and Scott look mortified, their cute date night ruined in the blink of an eye. "We hadn't gotten that far."

"Well I sure as hell am not staying home watching lacrosse videos again, so if the five- possibly six of us are hanging out, we need a plan."

Oh, this is bad. Normal high school level bad. Maybe the werewolf murder scene was easier to handle.

"How about bowling?" she suggests. Absolutely not.

"I'm all good, but thanks Lydia," and then I add, "Stiles and I are gonna work on a project together instead."

She looks dissapointed but shifts he gaze onto her boyfriend, who looks ready to stab his eye out with the plastic fork clenched in his fist.

"If Aurora isn't going, then there won't be any real competition. And I only bowl with real competition." Jackson's not allowed to call me Rory. I made that perfectly clear when he tried talking down to me one time and I punched him in his eye. Now we aren't allowed to stand too close to each other, legally speaking.

Allison bites back, "How do you know we aren't real competition?" She looks to Scott, "You can bowl, right?"

Stiles and I whip our heads in Scott's direction, just waiting for his dumbass response. It's like we can sense when he's about to make a complete idiot of himself.

Scott glares at Jackson, "Yeah, in fact, I am a terrific bowler" Yikes.

****

Yet again, I am losing sleep because of Scott's new issue.

Stiles' jeep comes to a halt outside of the fence, where the bus that housed the crime scene earlier, lies beyond.

We all exit the car, before Scott says, "No way, you guys stay in the car." He comes over to me and places his hands on my shoulders to gently guide me back to the car.

"What?" I try digging my heels into the ground but to no avail. Scott was always strong, but this is ridiculous.

"Yeah, Rory will stay, but I'm coming with" Thanks Stiles. He meets my eyes, "No offense, but I would feel better if I knew you were safe in the car. Not waltzing through a murder scene." My arms whip out to the sides in disbelief. What the fuck man?

Scott stops, and turns back to Stiles, "I'm going alone."

"Okay why is it starting to feel like your Batman and I'm Robin? Alright, I don't mean to be Robin all the time. I deserve to be Batman some of the time too!"

"Who does that make me?" I question, feeling insanely left out. Maybe I should have taken Lydia up on her offer of a girls' movie night instead. Maybe there I would feel more wanted.

"I would say Wonder Woman but sometimes you are evil. So I'll say Cat Woman."

Smiling I give him a thanks, as Scott looks ready to recreate his crime scene. "Nobody is any sort of comic book character any of the time, alright?!"

Stiles, not knowing when to quit says, "Not even some of the time?"

"Stay here! Both of you!"

Stiles huffs in annoyance, as Scott hops the fence and I climb into the passenger seat.

"If I'm Cat Woman, then you would totally be my Batman. Just so you know."

Stiles looks to me with grateful eyes, "Thanks, Rory."

Our moment of peace doesn't last long enough, because in the distance we see a guard shining a light too close to where Scott is lurking. Stiles starts honking his horn, causing my arm to shoot out and grasp his wrist, trying to get him to stop. He gets himself out of my grasp easily and continues making noise.

"Stiles! What the hell are you doing?"

"Scott needs to leave like now."

Before I can answer, I see Scott do a couple of flips and suddenly is he barreling into the back seat, shouting incoherently at Stiles.

The car jerks into motion and we make a speedy getaway. Stiles would be a great Batman- he already has his own Bat mobile and everything.

"Did it work? Did you remember?" Stiles shouts.

"Yeah- I was there last night. And the blood, it's mine."

"Did you attack him?" I ask. I really don't want him to be a murderer.

"No, someone else was in there with us. Their eyes were glowing. It had to be Derek."

"Why would Derek help you remember that he killed someone?" Oh yeah, long story short, Derek is Scott's newfound mentor. But we can't trust anything he says. Cause that makes total sense.

Stiles interjects, "It's got to be a pack thing." Sensing our confusion, he continues, "Like an initiation. You do the killing together."

"Because ripping someone's throat out is a real bonding experience," Scott replies back.

"Yeah, but what he's saying is that you didn't do it. Which means-"

"Which means I can go out with Allison!" Bingo, bullseye, right on the money.

"Wait I thought she was gonna say that means you won't kill us?" Stiles gawks. Oh yeah, that too.

****

A/N: chapter three is down- nine more to go! sorry this was way short- but the date takes up a lot of the episode. I'm watching the vampire diaries currently, and am thinking of doing a rewrite of that as well. let me know if that sounds interesting. as always, my inbox is open! thank you so much for reading!

[eri-blogs-life]

Generally, I'm pretty blase about people misgendering me. It tends to be an "over-there" type thing, you know? People ain't misgendering me to my face, they're talking over in the other room calling me he and I'm just over hearing it and that's whatever

But jeez has today been a hard one on the misgendering. Lots of to my face sir's and the like. And that i can usually manage. I did not expect what'd send me in to a real hard gender dysphoria spiral would be someone asking "if there were any ladies back there who might have a tampon"

Like, that feels bad. I know i don't look or sound much like a lady most of the time, but... no, there's no but. I just am not someone seen as a woman. God i can't imagine how hard my coworkers have to work to call me a woman... no, that's not really true either even if it feels true. I have no problem calling people women who don't much look to me like they're women. When you know someone and they say they're a woman its easy to see them that way. It's just strangers and assholes who are the problem

So yeah, i don't feel good. I feel super dysphoric and i gotta deal with at least another hour and a half of work while feeling empty and sick and like a disgusting freak but not in a good way

[chocolatepot]

2.02 thoughts!

DAMN Crowley talking to the goats about himself, basically, yeah? God will destroy you for no fucking reason.

Muriel is such a John Finnemore idiot character. Love that.

My ambivalence to Ineffable Bureaucracy aside, Gabriel remembering the song even after putting all of his memories into a fly is pretty sweet. (Gabriel is also such a John Finnemore idiot. He writes great idiots.)

This whole thing with the Scottish pub's jukebox feels like something that should have been given to Maggie to investigate, maybe. Like all of the stuff that the human characters were able to look into for the viewers' benefit in s1/the book - it feels like too much of a digression for Aziraphale when there's so much going on in the plot. I feel like it could have helped to make things less jam-packed.

Aziraphale doing the little miracle to get the guy out of his seat (and seeming to be closed to get away from street association man) - again, a little selfishness!

When I first watched this ep I KNEW he was going to characterize Maggie as having a "pash".

I don't like the Jane Austen joke ... I know I'm being a killjoy/taking it too seriously. A friend pointed out that it's very Doctor Who-ish and it is. We don't have TIME for stupid jokes, there is too much plot to cover.

Truly love that Peter Davison is Job and Ty Tennant is Job's annoying gay son. "Bildad the Shuite" is so silly that it really pleases me.

The first time in history that Crowley insists to Aziraphale that "no I really am evil and awful, I'm such a bad guy"? And he's immediately proven wrong.

I always liked the idea that Aziraphale discovered the pleasures of human food himself (with pleasure in physical comforts and food/drink being his own personal love of the Earth to mirror Crowley's), but it being something that Crowley introduces him to, as supreme lover of Earth, works as well.

Aziraphale being jealous that Job gets to speak to God (when was the last time God actually interacted with any angels besides Metatron? is she talking to the archangels, even?) when God is just lecturing him like an asshole, asking him questions he obviously has no answer to ...

I am such a child, the "reach into his robe - no, higher" joke really landed with me.

I feel like Gabriel and Michael would have questioned the number of children being given, since she was supposed to have seven? Also makes me wonder if the poor woman still conceives seven more times, since that was apparently divinely ordained. (I guess she could still miscarry. I just want to save her from seven births at her age.)

The "our car, our bookshop" conversation hits so well on a second viewing - but again, so selfish. There is no way he has ever considered the car shared until the moment that he needed it!

Pride and Prejudice foreshadowing/parallel - Gabriel sort of was an angel in possession of a "good fortune" as supreme archangel, and the first line is sarcastic, but he did find himself in want of a wife, of sorts. I'm connecting the dots! (You haven't connected shit.)

The interesting thing about Aziraphale's abusive relationship with Heaven/God is that it's a staple of fic, yet ... not quite like this. The focus in my experience is usually on him being directly bullied rather than on the doubt engendered in him by God/Heaven doing shitty things and his fears about what doubting would mean (though tbf I don't read as much GO fic as I do OFMD fic). I'm sort of eager to see if people jump on this.

Crowley thinks he's so adorable when he's freaking out about being "fallen". So cute so cute so cute. How does David Tennant load so much affection into his smile? And the "as far as he can" callback ... *chef's kiss* It is interesting to me how in/after s1 I was very into the dynamic where Crowley gets off on protecting Aziraphale, and now I am kind of like "... he's been GIVING for so many centuries, when is Aziraphale going to turn around and match that?" Some of that is obviously echoes from having seen the finale, but some is definitely what I was thinking as I watched the first time. (Presumably the answer is "in s3," obviously.)

[missfingers]

ok i don't know much about yakuza but i gotta know for the choose violence ask game: 3, 8, 11, 16, 22, 24? (you can also do these about another fandom instead if you want, i just chose yakuza bc those are ur little guys)

HI AUSTIIINNN. forgive me this will get long

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

ohh my god theres been so many. but okay i will specifically pull up an example from the server i run. no screenshots cause the conversation was way too long but essentially yakuza has a massive misogyny problem with its female characters (of which there are. barely any). the conversation was specifically about the hostess mechanic, which is this minigame that appears in almost every game where you go to a hostess club and have a date there (a hostess club if ur unaware is basically softcore sex work its paying a woman to talk to you at a club). ofc nothing wrong with hostessing but people were specifically talking about how it was Kind Of Creepy that all the protags are like.... 40+ and all the hostesses / other female love interests are a lot younger.

and then this guy came in saying something along the lines of... if you criticise the way hostesses are objectified in yakuza then actually you hate women and sex workers and youre saying its not a real career .....? NO ONE WAS SAYING THAT. it was really one of those situations where the person was acting like these fictional female characters have their own agency to do sex work and flirt with older men ignoring completely the Old Men Writing The Series. they are not real people making their own decisions these are women written by men. it was bizarre. this guy also eventually said that if you criticise panty shots in anime youre racist or something because "japanese culture is like that" okay.

already answered 8 here! <3

just realised i completely got switched up on numbers and i already answered 11 and thought it was 10, so my answer for 11 is here but i will also answer 10 for @kasugas since i fucking. didnt.

10. worst part of fanon

majima woobification. and the worst part is its in the games now too like they straight up woobified him in kiwami and i cant STAND IITTTT. hes literally a yakuza boss he violently beats up his men he canonically married an 18 year old and hit her when she aborted their fetus hes not a good guy and i love when canon shows that. but then fanon is just like solely fucking majima everywhere characterisation of ooo hes just a silly little faggot who loves kiryu and kiryu hates him <333 (even though kiryu. does not. and finds his antics hilarious in every other game. and treats him as his closest friend.) and also the uncle majima stuff....... i like thinking about his relationship with haruka as much as the next guy but when people just. slap them together with no consideration to the fact he KIDNAPPED HER. AT 10 YEARS OLD. like dude shes going to be traumatised you cant just Ignore that for the sake of giving her two dads?

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

oh i fucking know. i KNOW why they like it and the answer is theyre uncreative yaoi loving freaks but so much nishitani content is just him acting like some borderline rapey daddydom and its soooooo Eugh. they make majima into this uwu baby who doesnt want any of his advances until the relationship is literally liek something out of a fucking yaoi where he "really wants it deep down but hes going to act like he doesnt so its going to feel so uncomfortable and hes going to get borderline assaulted". the entire appeal of nishimaji to me is that nishitani is literally so down horrifically bad for majima and majima actually likes him back even if he thinks hes weird as shit. theyre both insane for each other.

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

ok im going to sound deranged here but his relationship with mirei. thats the 18 year old i mentioned. a lot of people choose to ignore he did that and like.... i get it its very uncomfortable to accept your favourite dude would prey on a kid like that but like. i feel like it does a disservice to his character to ignore that? it shows how he perpetuates the cycle of abuse and its so incredibly interesting to me but so many people just say "he wouldnt do that!!!!" when like.... yes he would. im sorry but he would.

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

fuckig hell idk theres so much horrible yakuza discourse. ig its relevant rn but like whenever anyone genuinely critiques how fandom acts (misogyny, racism, woobifying a genuinely morally reprehensible character, ableism, just anything) and then the people who do this shit get all up in arms about it and act like its pointless infighting when its... genuine shit that makes a community unsafe

[takingback-thepenguin]

Since three more episodes have come out, here is a list of more sentence starters from Shipwrecked’s web-series, Headless: A Sleepy Hollow Story, this time from episodes 4, 5, and 6. Some of the lines have been edited to fit as sentence starters, and feel free to change pronouns/add names/etc as you see fit. Tw: Death, food, smoking mention, violence/killing mention, blood, general tws that go with The Legend of Sleepy Hollow.

Episode 4: The Star on the Stage

“To make matters worse, he's/she’s/they’ve got a crush.”

“Maybe she'll/he’ll/they’ll see that he's/she’s/they’re just mmmm...not that appealing.”

“Oh, come on, man.”

“How's the landlord?”

“I’m just waiting for her/him/them to wake up and accuse me of murder.”

“Go lock the door.”

“I don't have long.”

“His/Her/Their tombstone says he/she/they died in 1776!”

“What the-? This is trippy as hell.”

“My hands smell like hands.”

“Oh snap! I'm alive!”

“Yo, this is tight!”

“Being six feet underground was a bit of a bummer.”

“I died doing what I loved.”

“Whoops.”

“Why does your tombstone say you died in 1776?”

“I'm committed to being the best re-enactor there ever was.”

“You guys got any hot Cheetos?”

“This is a disaster.”

“I have to go to this show.”

“_____’s saving me a seat.”

“Yoooo, is this you??”

“Whoa, look at that!”

“That's funny.”

“Oh, my God. Your yearbook!”

“Are you sitting backwards in a chair?”

“They told us to do that.”

“_____ wrote "Butts!!"

“It's been a wild ride.”

“Thanks for everything.”

“See you on the other side.”

“Wow. Ominous.”

“We've been through a lot.”

“She/He/They want(s) me to invite you.”

“You don't sound very enthused.”

“It's just, I don't really—”

“I would love to!”

“Oh, my gosh, I love live theatre.”

“I love live anything.”

“Get it?”

“This guy/gal/one gets it.”

“Hey, can we stop at a 7-Eleven on the way there?”

“Do those still exist?”

“All right, whatever. Cool.”

“Aren't you going to sing about this?”

“Bard Union says I need to take a four hour break every 30 minutes.”

“How do you get into the bard union?”

“_____! You made it.”

“Oh hey, I'm _____.”

“Hey, maybe we should all stop talking because the show's about to start.”

“I think our production of this annual tradition is going to blow your socks off!”

“Art is messy.”

“Enjoy the history of Sleepy Hollow!”

“I was in this play when I was ten! Really got me into history.”

“Oh, hi! I didn't see you there.”

“You sure did spook me.”

“Wait a minute. That's my job.”

“Um, wrong.”

“To tell you my story, I need to start from the beginning.”

“Ugh, do your research!”

“Lunchable?”

“Cutie?”

“I got an idea!”

“What have I done? What have I done?”

“Man, I know so much stuff. I really wasted my potential.”

“Ham?”

“Hey, _____. What are you doing after this?”

“Shut up.”

“This is my favorite part.”

“My mom used to tell me this story when I was a kid. Freaked me out so bad.”

“The Woman in White is said to haunt the woods, alerting those who pass to steer clear! Lest they be caught in a deadly storm, as she was.”

“Stay away from Raven Rock!”

“I don't know what you're talking about.”

“I am not jealous of _____.”

“Okay, boss.”

“That's ten miles away.”

“They have a spa there I just love.”

“I have a referral.”

“Are you, a grown man/woman/person, actually asking about the logistics of ghost hauntings?”

“Uh, the other kids are asking if you can drive us to Denny's.”

“Oh, fine.”

“No singing.”

“Has anyone ever figured out how that story began?”

“That stuff's poisonous.”

“I'll go stop him/her/them.”

“I have to get back to work anyway.”

“If I leave _____ alone too long, things start disappearing into other dimensions.”

“Well, I got to go to work, too, right? Work on making lunch! Yeah!”

“Tuna sandos! Less red meat!”

“So? You, uh...headed back to the graveyard soon?”

“Why would he/she/they go to the graveyard?”

“I've hotboxed in the mausoleum!”

“I don't know if you can tell, but I party.”

“I coulda used that during the historical abomination we just witnessed.”

“Hit me!”

“Oh, my God!”

“This is—“ “A scientific anomaly?”

“This is incredible!”

“My mother used to tell me stories about the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hollow.”

“I wish my mom was here to meet you.”

“_____’s been, like, casting spells.”

“It's a whole group thing.”

“I-I promised my dad I'd watch _____ with him this afternoon, but I really want to help.”

“Things are getting interesting with you around, _____.”

“Well, looks like that blew up in your face.”

“I knew she'd/he’d/they’d be DTF. Down to…find. The head.”

“It's a little risky for me right now.”

“You kind of owe me one.”

“I want her/him/them to represent me in court tomorrow.”

“Coast is clear. Let's boogie.”

“Let's boogie, _____.”

Episode 5: The Chaos In Court

“Where have you been?”

“Your court date starts in 10 minutes.”

“He/She/They was/were acting so weird.”

“Just…go look, go look over there.”

“Check it out!”

“Something tells me that she’s/he’s/they’re not an attorney at law.”

“Hey, what's up fam?”

“Hey, sorry I've been AWOL for a minute.”

“I'm going to be real with you for a second.”

“It totally bummed me out.”

“Okay, bye. Nice.”

“Check it out.”

“Hey, introduce yourself, man!”

“Oh, man! Pantsed!”

“Oh man. I look great.”

“Who would want more of this?”

“So many people want more of this.”

“Oh, who, me?“

“What's up? I'm waiting on an important delivery.”

“Are you helping _____?”

“Why didn't you tell me?”

“We don't have a lot of time.”

“Okay, stop. I know!”

“We need to be able to trust each other!”

“Why is it that I see you every day?”

“Oh, no! What a bummer.”

“'Sup, _____?”

“Your beachy locks are looking particularly effortless today.”

“Prove it.”

“I bet you're really, really happy with yourself.”

“That was...very hard to hear.”

“I think of myself as the Marty McFly of my life, obviously.”

“Am I the villain?”

“Did I just Biff my relationship with _____?”

“Candygram for _____!”

“These are on loan from the town archives.”

“I'm going to need you to be exceptionally careful.”

“Don't, like, use them as coasters or get any of your fake blood on them.”

“I'm talking to you.”

“It wasn't fake.”

“I'll be back for these soon.”

“Don't forget to stretch at least once an hour.”

“Thanks, _____.”

“I know how you can make it up to _____.”

“You can help me sort through all these documents.”

“Pound it.”

“Oh, no thanks.”

“Guilty!”

“Not guilty! I mean, of...of crime.”

“I’m guilty of being _____. I'm _____.”

“You were—you wanted to know if I was _____?”

“Oh, God. I feel sick.”

“Oh, hey, Pepto?”

“Good call.”

“Please, I need to stay under the radar and just get through this.”

“And this is...?”

“I'm the defendant's counsel, _____.”

“I may not have a law degree, but I do have plenty of unpaid parking tickets.”

“Is that...the newest iPhone?”

“I'm looking to upgrade.”

“How is the camera on that?”

“Interesting! Let's talk after.”

“You are charged with trespassing.”

“I might have known.”

“Can you please recount the events of that day?”

“There I was, working the graveyard shift—literally—when I came across this ne'er-do-well doing no well.”

“Is this true?”

“Were you doing no well?”

“You're supposed to be helping me!”

“Hey, you can't handle the truth, man!”

“Hey, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.”

“Boom! That's what two years at Houdini Summer Camp for Children will getcha.”

“My socials need a glow-up! Can you help me?”

“I got you.”

“Oh man, you're drenched!”

“When did you have time to make all this, slime?”

“Do not try this at home.”

“I am a licensed prankster.”

“I have my degree in biochemistry from MIT.”

“I got 50 hours of community service.”

“Hope you're happy.”

“You hungry?”

“What I did was supremely uncool.”

“Using our magical abilities to thrust you into the clutches of an unjust legal system was very unchill of me.”

“I’m filled with regret.”

“Not to stress you out any more, but my dad wants to have you over for dinner tomorrow.”

“That actually might not be true.”

“We did some digging.”

“I got to head home.”

“I promised Dad I'd watch _____, but, um...I'lI see you tomorrow?”

“You won!”

“Will murdering _____ cheer you up?”

“I guess just look for a giant yogurt truck!”

“Oh, you guys got me so good.”

“Prankster becomes the prankee. Nice!”

“Oh my God, my head.”

“Choose your destiny.”

“Where am I?”

“What's happening?”

“No, no, no. It's okay.”

“You're like, um, a magical zombie.”

“Everything's okay!”

Episode 6: The Distractions At Dinner

“No! Don't hang up. Don't hang up.”

“You have to stop calling me.”

“I think I could really help you!”

“No, _____ you can't come here.”

“I'm so good at characters.”

“I took an improv class and I never even got to the show.”

“Please let me do this!”

“_____ will recognize you.”

“I'm trying to impress _____.”

“I can't have a weird ghost zombie showing up.”

“_____ is going to investigate while he's/she’s/they’re distracted.”

“I have to go.”

“I missed the whole song!”

“Dude, that was my best stuff.”

“Can you play it again?”

“Our sacrifice to the Pagan gods is here.”

“_____, my good man/woman/person, our guest of honor! Welcome.”

“Does _____ need any more help in the kitchen?”

“She's/He’s/They’re finishing up.”

“Any more vagrant sightings at the Old Dutch House?”

“Hope she/he/they wake(s) up soon.

“You know about that.”

“Oh, you heard?”

“Look out! We have a new resident bad boy/girl/one!”

“What are you doing?”

“There could be invisible lasers!”

“Your DNA is getting everywhere!”

“Oh, my blood.”

“Is there DNA in blood?“

“Is there DNA in blood? I sure hope not cause it’s everywhere.”

“You can see where she/he/they get(s) her/his/their good looks!”

“She/He/They got her/his/their obstinate streak from Yours Truly.”

“She/He/They wrote the book on local legends.”

“There wasn't a haunted rock or a bewitched gas station within 100 miles that she/he/they didn't know about.”

“Before you leave, pick up a few of her/his/their books and read up.”

“Uh, did she/he/they ever mention the Headless Horseman?”

“Oh, haven't you seen him/her/them yet?”

“You're not a true resident of Sleepy Hollow until you think you've seen the Headless Horseman.”

“She/He/They always thought the best of people.”

“She/He/They got taken with conspiracy theories.”

“Not sure where we lost her/him/them.”

“Wonder who that could be.”

“There's um, someone here for you.”

“Hey, how are ya?”

“I parked in a red zone, but they don't ticket on weeknights.”

“Nice to meet ya.”

“I hope you don't mind, I brought my Dunkies.”

“I'll, uh, set another place.”

“I must say, _____, I have a feeling we've met before.”

“I don't think so.”

“I have one of these.”

“Now that is sus.”

“What do you do?”

“I just got recruited by the CIA, actually.”

“You know, CSI, SVU, NBC, you know.”

“They've been scoutin' me for a while due to my ability to solve crimes.”

“Turns out? I'm wicked good at it!”

“That's a noble pursuit.”

“Public safety, justice, it all sounds thrilling!”

“You know, I've heard there's actually a lot of paperwork involved. Not like on TV.”

“I’ve never done any paperwork.”

“Whoa, check this out. It's a manuscript.”

“I often wonder if I'd ever have the chance to meet the ghost myself.”

“Perhaps this weekend, l'll finally come face to face with destiny.”

“I'll be ready.”

“Where would I put the evidence? Maybe in an old phone like this?”

“Go long!”

“Why?”

“Shhhhh.”

“This is, like, a million years old.”

“This is real leather.”

“I really hope she's/he’s/they’re not up here working.”

“Uh, we can explain!”

“_____ and I are in love!”

“We're meeting here for our lover's rendezvous.”

“It's the last place anyone would think to look for us!”

“I noticed you're admiring the chandelier.”

“We try not to speak about him/her/them.”

“More rolls?”

“I think you might be interested in a little dessert.”

“It's an old family recipe.”

“Shall we?”

“Oh, my God, you guys, that's amazing!”

“How long has this been going on?”

“I'd marry her/him/them...if I could.”

“Who would accept us?”

“Oh, God your skin is so cold.”

“You know what? I can marry you right now, I'm ordained!”

“It's, like, a lot.”

“No, no. There's no need.”

“Weddings are expensive.”

“There's so much to do!”

“My mom's not here.”

“Oh, I insist.”

“Hooray.”

“It's me!”

“I know.”

“I told you to stay home.”

“They're in my ear, like, telling me cool stuff to say.”

“This is the dumbest idea.”

“I heard that!”

“They told me to say that.”

“Now if you could just, uh, sign here and here for me.”

“I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

“You may kiss the bride.”

“I can't do it. I cant do it.”

“Do it, do it. Do it. Oh, God!!”

“I always cry at weddings.”

“What makes you so sure he's/she’s/they’re responsible anyways?”

“The last thing I remember is _____ giving me a drink and then pain.”

“He/She/They poisoned you? Why?”

“I don’t know.”

“I was a great assistant.”

“I'm, like, very good at accents.”

“Try to remember!”

“You have to go.”

“I am so close to getting a confession!”

“High time for pie time!”

“Look who I found.”

“I thought we might raise a toast.”

“You sure you don't want a piece of this delicious pie?”

“Sox game starts in ten.”

“Thanks for dinner.”

“I'm watching you.”

“Lovely to meet you.”

“Listen, if you're ever back in town, don’t be a stranger.”

“I am not a stranger.”

“Oh, excuse me.”

“Don't touch my pie, _____.”

“Okay, what is going on? Who was that?”

“I just picked one at random.”

“Here's the thing, and it's funny. You're—You're going to laugh.”

“She/He/They think(s) that your dad killed her/him/them.”

“I know, It's crazy! Pie?”

“Why would my father kill her/him/them?”

“You don’t think that she/he/they knew something?”

“Are you kidding me?”

“You're actually taking her/him/them seriously?”

“I think you should leave.”

“Get out!”

“Please don't.”

“We had a deal. And I am not renegotiating it.”

[harryconcepts]

part 54

not to cause anyone any emotional distress and/or trauma but harry definitely likes to make out with you when you're both naked and he settles you on his lap, tucking himself between your lower lips so he can feel how wet you are :( he moves back and forth slowly, sliding easily from how soaked you are, and smirking at how you whimper every time he nudges against your clit :( he just likes the teasing feeling and how much it makes you whine :( and he always does this to tease before he fucks you :(( having you tucked against the sensitive underside, rubbing on him slowly to show him you're wet enough :( he refuses to put it in until he decides you're ready for him :( until then he just makes you tease yourself until you're losing your mind :(

him standing over a terrified woman, blood on his face, making her look so small as he leans closer 🤕 he says something like "don't be scared...." and leans even closer to lick a drop of blood off her face 🤕 he says "I'm not going to hurt you... unless you give me a reason to" and his voice is so low and soft and fake comforting 🤕 I need to see him as a psycho so fucking bad or I'll die

ooooh yes the "bimbo" 😏 who is suspiciously not around when ppl are getting picked off 😏 who always comforts his girl friends when they're sobbing over their friend who just got killed 😏 saying "it's all going to be alright" as they cry on his shoulder 😏 but he's staring off into the distance and right before the screen goes black his lips turn up in a little smirk 😏 and it all culminates in him coming after his "best friend", giving very much scream with the mask and all 😏 god im so into this help

oh no 🤕 the old fashioned video recorder on their secluded cabin honeymoon 🤕 starts with them giggling and kissing and him setting up the camera on their nightstand to record a little "home movie" 🤕 them being so so happy and rolling around on the bed while they kiss 🤕 then exactly like Kelsea said it just starts to get a little creepy 🤕 she starts hearing weird noises and seeing shadows but he gaslights her and shuts her up with kisses 🤕and he's a little mean, knowing she's all on edge but he still sneaks up behind her to scare her just so he can laugh and hug her 🤕 then the rest of it is just like Kelsea said, she's on the ground injured and out comes harry who's supposed to be dead, but here he is standing over her and smiling🤕 crouching down and wiping a little smear of blood off her face, shushing her whimpers and saying "it's all going to be over soon, just close your eyes baby" and then he reaches for the camera, and all we see is one last smirk from him and we hear her terrified gasp before it all goes dark 🤕

THE BIMBO THAT ACCIDENTALLY OUTLIVES EVERYONE OMG YES YES YES HES JUST SO STUPID THAT THE KILLER'S LITTLE TRICKS AND GAMES DONT WORK ON HIM BC HES JUST ABSOLUTELY CLUELESS I LOVE THIS???? HE HEARS SCARY NOISES IN THE BASEMENT AND HES JUST LIKE "HM WEIRD OH WELL IM JUST GONNA GO STAY WITH MY MOM :D" AND HE DOESNT EVEN REALIZE ALL THE FREAKY SHIT HAPPENING HE JUST WALTZES THROUGH LIFE AND THE MOVIE AS COMEDIC RELIEF

when bestie harry finds out you like him he would be sooooooooooooo horribly pesty 😋 he's all "ooooooooh my girl has a crush on me" and making you blush 😋 h wraps his arms around you so you can't run off and whispers "it's a good thing I have a crush on you too" and he probably licks your cheek bc he's just a freak 😋he would be kissing your cheek first but you keep turning away just to bug him so finally he grabs your jaw with his other hand and holds you in place so he can give you a big lick 😋 you're squirming and going "ew ew eeeeeeewwwwww" and he's just all "youuuuuu love it😁"

no no no no no........ casual fwbs who are mostly just besties 😵‍💫 he notices you're stressed so he's like "come here babe, let me rub your back" and you know what that's going to lead to 😵‍💫 soon you let out a quiet little moan bc he's so good at this, and he freezes before he's moving off you and saying "flip over sweet girl" and he kisses you before you can say anything 😵‍💫 you're pulling at his shirt to get him closer so he moves back on top of you, grinding down on you to relieve some of the pressure building up 😵‍💫 you can't help but moan then, raising your hips to meet his 😵‍💫 he says right up against your lips "how bout we relieve some more of that stress?" and crawls down to lay with his face between your legs 😵‍💫

and for a while all the touching you do is over the clothes which makes it feel so much more dirty and secretive 🤕after he makes you cum he kisses you, smirking and saying "you're going to need some new panties, think you soaked right through those ones" 🤕

OHHHHHH no he loves to use your toys on you 🤕 he finds your secret stash one day while you're in the shower and when you get out he's sitting on the bed just messing with all of them 🤕 your eyes go wide and you rush to take them out of his hands but he just grabs your wrist and says "ah ah ah... wanna tell me what you've got here sweet girl?" and your cheeks are burning when you say "not particularly..." but he just pulls you closer saying "I think you're a liar... i think you've been thinking about this ever since I first asked you what you like" and you can barely think but you stammer out "maybe?" and he looks sooooo cocky 🤕 he pulls you to sit on his lap, and he picks up one of your vibrators 🤕 he says "now what's this little number?" and switches it on, then giggles at how strong it is 🤕 he says "wanna show me how you use this?" and you're so embarrassed but also so turned on 🤕 finally you nod and he's smiling so big, he adjusts you so he's sitting with his back against the headboard and your back is to his chest, his legs spread to fit you between them so you'll be totally surrounded by him 🤕 he puts the toy in your hand and says "alright then, show me" and leans a little so he can watch over your shoulder 🤕 or maybe you have a mirror across from your bed, and he grips your jaw and lifts your head so you have to look 🤕 he turns his head to kiss your neck and whispers "don't be shy, show me how you like it" and watches when you move to press it against your clit 🤕 you gasp at how intense it already feels, leaning back against his strong chest and you know he's got you 🤕 your head leans on his shoulder, and he can see your legs straining to close so he hooks his own legs over yours to keep them open 🤕 you're letting out the prettiest sounds bc it feels so good, and he's whispering in your ear like "doing such a good job for me baby, you're close aren't you?" and all you can do is nod 🤕 he's so so obsessed with how you're trembling a bit, and your moans are getting closer and closer together and he knows you're almost there 🤕 he reaches his hands up to thumb over your nipples so gently, really just a little tease over your shirt, but apparently that's all you needed bc you're arching your back and letting go 🤕 with your head on his shoulder and his hands on your chest, surrounded by him just like he wanted 🤕you're breathing so heavy as you come down, and he's nosing along your neck, kissing every so often 🤕 he reaches down and closes his hand over the vibrator and says "my turn?" and you laugh breathlessly saying "give me a minute" and he smiles against your skin and says "whatever my girl wants" 🤕

kissing bestierry at a nye party 😋 neither of you have a date (and you maybe definitely did that on purpose 😋) and he subtly makes sure he's the closest person to you when the ball drops 😋 you've never kissed like that before, but he's kissed your cheek and he knows it will be okay so when the ball drops you look around for a second before he puts one hand on your cheek and looks at you 😋 your eyes drop to his lips for just a second and then come back up, and you give him a tiny nod and then his lips are on yours 😋 it's just a short little kiss, and when he pulls away he's pecking you a few timss and murmuring "happy new year" 😋 then you're hanging on each other all night, as the party starts dying down you lean up to whipser in his ear "will you come back to my place?" and he's like 😋yes of course😋 even tho he's not completely sure what you mean, but then you say "good, because I want to kiss you again" and his eyes go wide for a second before he's ushering you out the door 😋

harry knows you get a little jealous seeing him be romantic w other people (even acting) so he makes sure to give it to you extra good that night 😋doing alllll the things he knows you like and loving on you so good 😋

yes I'm so afraid he likes to go slow during sex to find out exactly what you like 🤕 like anon said he fingers you so he can be sure he knows where your g spot is 🤕 just spending so much time getting acquainted with your body so he knows just how to make you fall apart 🤕 he definitely makes you cum several times, until you're too tired to give him any more and then he figures out what you need for aftercare 🤕and i fear he never shuts his mouth 🤕 you're constantly hearing "yeah? liking that, pretty girl?" and "that feel nice?" and "how about when I do this?" he's so 🤕🤕🤕

being pretty inexperienced when you start dating harry, and one day when you're kissing you tell him how little you've actually done and he's backing off right away, apologizing for trying to move so fast, but you shake your head and grab his hands to keep him close 😌 he looks into your eyes, asking silently what you want, and you breathe "teach me, teach me how to do it and his lips are back on yours before you can even blink😌

can't stop thinking about how filthy Harry is 🤕 before he goes down on you he uses his thumbs to spread you open so he can just look 🤕 probably blowing some cold air on you just to see you flinch and whine 🤕 dragging his fingers up and down soooo lightly just to tease and feel how wet you are 🤕 when you try to move he just lays a heavy arm across your stomach to keep you still 🤕 and when he finally leans in to lick you you're close in seconds 🤕 but he's not ready to let you cum yet, so he moves away from your clit and focuses more on where you're dripping for him 🤕 he just wants to taste every bit of you 🤕 he's pushing his tongue inside and you nearly scream from how good it feels, and he tightens his grip on your hips bc he knows you'll be squirming around 🤕 then finally he kisses his way back up to your clit with messy, open mouth kisses, basically just making out with you, and sucks the sensitive nerves into his mouth 🤕 he's flicking his tongue against it and moaning from how turned on he is, and before you know it you're tensing up and cumming on his tongue 🤕

staying at Harry's for the first time and you're a little nervous and he can tell 😔 you're watching a movie and he can see you're getting sooooo tired but maybe a little too nervous to let him know you're ready for bed, so he just tightens his arm around you and gestures for you to lay your head on his chest 😔 hes playing with your hair gently and he says "you can go to sleep if you're tired, hm? I can turn this off if you want" and you just say "no it's okay you can leave it on" but 5 minutes later you're out 😔 he's so happy knowing you feel safe enough with him to fall asleep that easily 😔

one thing about harry is that he would be completely pussy whipped before you even sleep together 😌 he's got the biiiiiiggest crush on you and it's so entirely obvious to everyone even tho he thinks he's being subtle 😌 and when you start dating ? ooooh boy he's done for 😌 he does anything and everything for you, from refilling your drink at a party to cooking meals for you after your long day of classes 😌 he also loves to buy you stuff, to the point where you're telling him it's too much but he doesn't care 😌 he just has the biggest crushy crush and doesn't know how to handle it 😌

harry talking against your lips while he kisses you 🤕 we got a tiny taste of this in the trailer and it made me orgasm so fast 🤕 he's always smooching you and saying stuff like "gonna be a good girl for me?" and he keeps his lips on yours cause he can't bear to pull away 🤕 or "my pretty little wife" during your first private kiss after you're officially married 🤕 "my sweet girl, love you so much" 🤕 throwing up rn

no bc he would say "come on pretty girl" with the most evil smirk on his face as he lays down 🤕 guiding you up his chest and you know exactly what he wants 🤕 you plant your hands on his shoulders at first saying "I don't know if- i can't-" and he just says "come on baby, just wanna taste you, just let me make you feel good" and helps you get settled 🤕 you're holding yourself up a bit but he grips your thighs and pulls you down all the way against him 🤕 looping his arms around your legs so you can't pull away 🤕 he moans against you, just so turned on to have you like this 🤕 you glance down and his eyes are open and focused on yours, and you can see his mouth working 🤕 that's just too much to see right then, so your head tips back and your fingers tangle in his hair as you start to move your hips a little 🤕 and he can't get enough of you fucking yourself on his face, i honestly think he would cum from that 🤕

no offense guys but harry would make you cum more than once bc he's so obsessed with how wet and swollen you get 🤕 he's tracing his fingers over the sensitive skin saying "gonna give me one more?" and you're nearly sobbing from how overwhelming it all is but you're not ready to be done yet 🤕 he leans in to press a gentle kiss to your clit and he just loves the little scream you let out 🤕

thinking about being in the studio with bestierry and you make a comment or mention something that gives him a fabulous idea for a song or something and he's immediately like "wait wait nobody say anything, write that down" or "everyone shut up let me record a voice note" and a few minutes later when he's figured out this idea more he comes over and grabs your face and just plants one on you 🤭 he says "you are WONDERFUL" and gets back to work, meanwhile you're blushing and trying to process what just happened 🤭 and then youre trying so hard not to let it get to your head, you know he's an affectionate weirdo with everyone so you're acting like everything is fine but then that night when everyone is packing up he says "you coming to mine? there's a movie I've been wanting to watch" so you nod and follow him out to his car 😌 then when you're on the couch together he says "i have to tell you something" and you're sitting up, heart pounding already but you're trying to play it cool when you ask what's up and he lets out a deep breath before saying "I have a crush on you" and your eyes go wide but he keeps talking 😌 he says "I've liked you since forever so... um, yeah" and you're like ????? but he's all "i kissed you today, how is this a surprise?" and you're like "you kiss everyone!?!" and he says "yeah but it was different with you 🙄" as if it's so obvious 😭 then he says "maybe I should kiss you again, really drive the point home" and you're more than down for that 😌

watching the red carpet stuff go on from your hotel room bc you're too nervous to be seen in public with harry since your relationship has been private so far, but the second he get back you're absolutely jumping on him 😌 murmuring "you looked so fucking good out there, i almost couldn't wait for you to get back" and he groans when you kiss his neck, gripping your hips saying "but you did, right? you were a good girl and waited for me?" and you nod 😌 he says "such a good girl, why don't we take care of that? i think you've waited long enough" and he's pushing you down on the bed before he sinks to his knees 😌

he's so big and strong and masculine and he probably smells so good im wet rn just thinking about him coming back to the hotel, unbuttoning the top buttons of his shirt bc they've been bugging him all day, and coming over to give his girl a kiss 😵‍💫 he says "missed you today" and walks you backwards toward the bed 😵‍💫 you don't respond, you're too busy trying to get more of his shirt undone, but he grabs your wrists and waits until you look up at him, then says "did you miss me too?" and you nod so fast, unable to break his intense eye contact 😵‍💫 he says "why don't you show me? touch yourself, show me how wet you got for me while I was out" and his voice is stern letting you know that he's in charge tonight 😵‍💫 he's so close to you that he's all you can focus on, you can't think about anything but him and how good he looks and smells and probably tastes, but he's not gonna let you have what you want until you give him what he wants so you shakily say "i will, I'll do whatever you want me to do" and he smiles saying "that's what i like to hear" as he releases your hands 😵‍💫 he sits down on the chair across from the bed so he can have a good view as you spread your legs and get to work 😵‍💫he says "just want you touching, but you better not make yourself cum, that's my job" and you know it's going to be a long night 😵‍💫

thinking about showering with harry 😋 he's tripping over himself to wash you, and he refuses to use a cloth he wants to use his hands 😋 he spends 90% of his time on your boobs and what about it 😋 then when you're done he's wrapping you in a towel and handing you one of his big shirts and that's it, and you're like "and where are the rest of my clothes?" and he just says "you don't need them 😋"

usually you turn your head to the side when Harry's going down on you bc it's grounding to feel the pillow and bc it's just too much to look at him, but one night he reaches up and grabs your jaw, turning your head to face him again and saying "I've had about enough of that, you look at me when I'm touching you" and his voice is all stern 🤕 and any time you look away he stops 🤕

i think Harry likes edging you and he's so so mean but also soft 🤕 you're on your third or fourth round of the night and you're losing your mind, tears on your face just wanting to cum so bad 🤕 he strokes your cheek gently and says "I know baby, it's so much hm? you're being such a good girl for me though, I know you can take a few more" and he just keeps going 🤕 he even says "I know you want to finish, but i just love seeing my pretty girl like this, and needy and desperate for me... and if you cum that all goes away, so I'm not quite done with you yet" 🤕

and sometimes you want to see how fast you can get him there 🤭 so you're doing allllll the things he likes, squeezing down on him as hard as you can and whispering dirty words in his ear, letting out the prettiest little whines and even reaching down to play with his balls 🤭 soon he's gritting his teeth and gripping your hips saying "you have to- you have to stop or I'll cum" and you whisper "i want you to" and squeeze a little harder 🤭

being super inexperienced when you start dating harry, and when you finally tell him he's so nice about it 😔 saying it doesnt bother him at all, and he'll go at whatever pace you need 😔 then one day youre doing some kissing and you push your hips down against his and he lets out the neediest moan and says "such a good girl" and that makes you blush so hard 🤕 he says "ohhh you liked that hm? I'll keep that in mind 😌" and he's so smug being the first person to know what you like 🤕

harry perfects your coffee order on the very first try of getting it for you, and he brings it to you all 😁 and you take a sip and say "wowwwww you got it all right!" and he says "of course I did 😌" and you take another drink, nodding bc it's good 😌 he says "now i think that complicated coffee earned me a complicated kiss" which is his way of saying "make out with me for 3 hours while we grind on each other"