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rebelwrites · 3 years

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Secret Relationship

Harvey Specter x Reader

Summary: The reader and Harvey have known each other for years, despite the age difference something changes for both of them.

Prompt: “I apologise sincerely if my handsome face has kept you awake all night.”

A/N: this was a similar dream I had last night and was the inspo I needed to write.

Join The TagList Here 💜 // Harvey Specter Masterlist // Rebels Writing Challenge Masterlist

Neither of you knew how it happened, it just did. One day you saw the one and only Harvey Specter in a different light and he was the same with you.

You had known him for years with him being a friend of the family, and you always had a crush on him but never acted on it because let’s face it you were ten years younger than him and he was your dad’s best friend. But that didn’t stop you swooning over him every time he came round for dinner or when he would help you with your studying.

But fast forward to you finishing law school, he helped you land a job at the firm.

It was a week before you were due to start as an associate, which was a perfect excuse to go shopping to get a more suitable wardrobe for work. So here you were on a Friday night sorting your wardrobe out to make room for your new clothes when you heard your doorbell ring, leaving you slightly puzzled as you weren't expecting anyone and hadn’t ordered food yet.

Pausing your music, you made your way to the door, the only sound was your bare feet on the hardwood floor. Without thinking you opened the door to see Harvey standing there, with that goddamn smile that made you fall for him all those years ago.

“Harvey” you said, looking down at your appearance and suddenly feeling self conscious as you stood there in your plaid pyjama shorts and a vest top with no bra on. Your hair was a mess from not long getting out the shower and you had no makeup on.

“What are you doing here?” You finally managed to mumble letting him into your apartment.

“Well I thought I would stop by as we never celebrated you finishing law school and landing a job at the firm” he smirked waving the bottle of scotch in his hand.

“Urm yeah sure” you mumbled as your skin heated up from embarrassment. “Let me go get changed”

“Sweetheart what’s got you all nervous?” He asked with a smirk on his face as he stepped closer to you.

He knew, of course he knew. This was Harvey Specter. He wasn’t stupid. And you were damn sure he could hear how fast your heart was pounding against your rib cage.

The words were stuck in your throat, your feet were frozen in place.

“You don’t need to get changed okay” he whispered, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “In fact I’m going to get changed myself”

“You don’t have any clothes here Harvey” you mumbled feeling confused about why he would be getting changed.

“I brought a change of clothes with me” he winked, picking up his duffel bag from your sofa, the bag you were too preoccupied to notice.

So here you were standing in the middle of your apartment feeling like a teenage girl again. Trying to decide if Harvey was actually flirting with you or if you had made it all up in your head.

“Everything okay sweetheart?” Harvey asked, squeezing your shoulders.

“Yeah why wouldn’t it be?” You stuttered mentally cursing yourself. “But isn’t this inappropriate?”

“Why do you ask that?” He asked.

“Because you are my dad's best friend Harvey, there’s ten years between us and come next week you will essentially be my boss” you sighed realising that this might be the best you would get with the man you had spent so many nights dreaming of.

“Listen to me okay” he whispered, spinning you around so you were facing him, his hands resting on your hips and his thumb gently grazing your skin. “I don’t know when it happened but recently I can’t get you out of my head, and I guess I wanted to test the waters. I know that the timing probably isn’t great but I can’t hold back any longer. And don’t say you don’t want this to happen because I’ve seen the looks you give me when you think I’m not looking”

“This has got to be a dream” you mumbled biting down on your lip.

“If this was a dream would I be able to do this?” He smirked before his lips made contact with yours.

It took you a couple of seconds to realise what was happening. But the moment you did your arms wrapped around his neck and he pulled you closer to him. It was like your body was electric, the sparks you felt as he deepened the kiss, it was like you were floating. And you didn’t even realise he had walked you back to your sofa until you landed on the soft fabric with him on top of you.

“Do you think we can make this work?” You whispered against his lips, your eyes still closed.

“I’m willing to give it a try if you do” he whispered before gently kissing you again.

You and Harvey had now been dating for seven months now and not a soul knew. How you had both managed to keep the relationship secret when you basically worked together you had no clue. But you didn’t realise things were going to get harder.

Letting yourself into his apartment, a smile graced your face as the smell of your boyfriend filled your senses making you relax. Harvey was still at the office but that didn’t mean you couldn’t start dinner. You knew he would be stressed when he got back but you didn’t realise that would lead to your secret being harder to keep.

You were in your own little and didn't hear Harvey get back until you felt his arms wrap around your waist and his head rest on your shoulder.

“God I love getting home to find you here in just my shirt” he whispered “you make the shitty days better”

“What happened in the meeting?” You asked as you span around, running your hand through his hair.

“As punishment I’m now in charge of the associates” he whispered.

“Well we will just have to be even more sneaky then won’t we” you whispered trying to keep him calm. “You might have to calm down on the sneaky kisses”

“Nope not doing it” he pouted “your kisses get me through the day”

“We will figure something out” you whispered, kissing him softly.

It was now the next morning and tired was an understatement considering Harvey kept you up most of the night. Wandering into the kitchen you grabbed your smokes on the way and headed out to the balcony. To find Harvey sat out here reading the paper. He had already brought your coffee out with him.

“Go easy on me today” you laughed. “Seen as it is your fault I’m so tired”

“I didn’t hear you complaining at the time sweetheart” he winked putting his paper down. “But I apologise sincerely if my handsome face has kept you awake all night.”

“Hmmm” you winked while lighting your cigarette.

“I best get going” he smiled standing up placing a kiss on your head “I shall see you at the office”

Walking through the office with a very large coffee in hand you knew you were late but didn’t care you needed the caffeine today. What you didn’t expect was to see Harvey sat at your desk, leaning back in your chair.

“Nice of you to join us today, miss Y/L/N” he scolded.

“Morning to you to” you scoffed, rolling your eyes at him.

“Less of the attitude please, you show up late to work and have the audacity to sass me” Harvey snapped shaking his head. “I’m pulling you on the case you were working on and you can find yourself going over the 30 briefs that are in the filing room and I want them done by lunch”

“But” you tried to speak but he interrupted you.

“No buts now go, they aren’t going to read themselves” he smirked as he pulled his phone out.

As you were walking to the file room your phone buzzed.

New message: Specter 💜

Great acting baby, don’t worry there is only like two briefs I’m not gonna do my girl dirty like that 😜 x

Shaking your head as you pushed the door open. You saw Donna leaning against the desk with a smirk on her face. Since you started working at the firm you and her got extremely close.

“So Y/N is there anything you want to tell me?” She grinned.

“Urm Nope” you shrugged, placing your bag and phone on the desk. Forgetting that your phone was unlocked and your background was you and Harvey laid in bed.

“You may want to keep your phone locked if you don’t want people to know about you and Harvey” she whispered.

“Oh shit” you panicked fumbling for your phone.

“It’s fine I knew about you two a couple of months ago” she smirked “I mean it didn’t take me long to out two and two together”

“Please don’t say anything” you pleaded.

“Only if you come for drinks tonight and tell me everything” she grinned.

“Deal” you nodded just as Harvey walked into the room with that cocky smirk on his face.

“I shall leave you two alone” Donna winked “don’t worry I will text you if anyone comes”

As she walked off she smirked at Harvey before leaving the room.

“What was that about?” He asked as he pulled you close to him.

“She knows about us” you laughed.

“Of course she does” Harvey chuckled “she is Donna after all”

“I think it’s time we came clean with my dad” you whispered.

“I was thinking the same thing sweetheart how about we invite him over for dinner tonight and don’t worry no matter what his reaction is I will still be here and it will not change how much I love you” he smiled kissing you softly.

#harvey specter oneshot #harvey specter imagine #harvey specter x reader #harvey specter #suits imagine #suits x reader #suits usa

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remmushound · 3 years

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@assanmaharielsreblogs

“It’s not fair!”

Splinter couldn’t even begin to count how common that phrase was in his home anymore.

“Why does Donna get so much attention?”

The poor six year old softshell was sat alone and separate form his brothers, his eyes locked on his feet as they swung freely below him. Splinter looked back at the rest of his sons, the burden he bore weighing so heavy that it leaked through his eyes and spilled out in the form of watery tears. It wasn’t sad tears, particularly, just empty tears. Tired tears. Wistful tears that, only when he shook his head to renew the sense of purpose within him, finally disappeared. He stood up slowly and wobbled over to the other three gathered.

“Could you repeat that, Leonardo?” His voice rasped gently to the blue-bandana wearing child, his dark eyes boring into Leonardo’s blue ones.

Raphael and Michelangelo cowered away with a shared fear for any punishment that, While intended for their brother, may spill out over them for simply being in his vicinity. Leonardo, however, kept his nerve and stared down his father with his eyes still glimmering his determination.

“Why. Does. Donna. Get. So. Much. Attention?” When splinter’s gaze didn’t falter either, Leonardo seemed to grow the slightest bit of hesitance and added quickly, “Dad?”

Splinter stared without answering for a long moment, the only movement from the mutant a twitch of the ear or tail. Then, when he finally did respond, it wasn’t with violence. It was with a long, drawn-out sigh and the closing of his eyes to weed through the spiders web in his brain for an appropriate response.

“Leonardo.” He said finally, his eyes still closed and ears pulled back, “go into the bathroom and bring me the box of bandaids please.”

That made Leonardo withdraw more than anything else so far. “Wha— bandaids? Why—?”

“Go!” Splinter barked, and Leonardo scattered

“The rest of you?” Splinter stood up and swiveled to address the rest of his sons. “Please... line up agains the wall, oldest to youngest, leaving space for Leonardo.”

The brothers were equally confused, but made no further arguments before obeying their father and taking their places against the wall— Raphael, Donatello, a space for Leonardo, and Michelangelo at the end. Once they were all ready, Splinter sat down and waited for when Leonardo offered him the bandaid box and took his place between Donatello and Michelangelo.

Splinter remained seated. “Boys, I want you all to pretend you got hurt somewhere.”

He gave the children a moment longer to make their decisions before standing up and addressing Raphael first.

“Raphael, where were you hurt?”

“My hand!” Raphael beamed and held up the hand in question.

Splinter smiled and nodded knowingly, pulling out a bandaid and putting it gently onto the imaginary wound, followed by giving it a kiss that made Raphael fall into giggles. Splinter let himself smile more genuinely now at his son’s glee and gave a slight laugh himself before moving on to Donatello.

“Donatello, where were your hurt?”

“I scraped my knee!” Donatello stated happily, indicating the knee in question.

Splinter smiled and nodded just as he had with Raphael, then took Donatello’s right hand and put a bandaid on it. Donatello pulled his hand back and looked at the bandaid, then looked back up at splinter with a bewildered expression. He opened his mouth to argue, but splinter held up a finger to silence him before moving on to the equally confused Leonardo.

“Leonardo, where were you hurt?”

“Umm... my head.”

Splinter nodded and put a bandaid on Leonardo’s hand.

“Michelangelo, where were you hurt?”

“I hurted my belly!”

Splinter put a bandaid on Michelangelo’s hand.

“There we go.” Splinter took a few steps back to stand in front of them, “There! All better!”

Michelangelo, Donatello, and Leonardo all looked at each other with similar expressions of hurt and upset and confusion.

“No were not.” Leonardo said finally.

Splinter scoffed and widened his eyes, blinking repeatedly as he shook his head in apparent aghast. “What do you mean? You were all hurt and I gave you all bandages!”

“But not in the right spot.” Michelangelo said, holding his hands to his plastron and looking like he was about to cry. “I hurted my tummy, not my hand!”

“Yeah! And I hurt my knee!”

“And I hurt my head.”

“But— but I gave you all the same thing!” Splinter argued back to the boys, leaning down on his knees to better match their height.

“But it didn’t help anyone other than Raph!” Leonardo tried to explain.

“Ohhhh.” Splinter gave a gasp of epiphany and nodded his head, “ohhh now I get it! You all needs bandaids in different places!”

“Exactly!”

“Oh, oh now I see.” Splinter look out three more bandaid and put it on their knee, head, and tummy. “There! Now is that better?”

“Yaya!” Michelangelo giggled and held his hands over his bandaid.

Splinter gave another exaggerated gasp. “Well would you look at that?”

“Look at what?” Leonardo tilted his head and looked around.

“Well, you all have a bandaid in a different place! Why is that?”

“Because we all got hurt in a different place.” Donatello said.

“Oh right, yes. That’s right.” Splinter’s smile was far more genuine now, a glint coming to his eyes despite their darkness. “Sometimes in life you might see someone getting something different than you, but that doesn’t mean they get any more care or love than you. They just need a bandaid in a different place. Donatello needs attention just as much as Leonardo needs attention and Raphael needs attention and Michelangelo needs attention. Just in different places— like how Michelangelo needs help with putting his letters the right way, and how Raphael needs his breathing exercises, and how Leonardo needs help focusing. Donatello needs help to keep himself safe. Do you understand?”

The brothers looked to Donatello, the little turtle bound safely in a pillow-guard on both sides of his shell and a helmet on his head that helped to both hold up his glasses and protect him.

“Yes, I understand.” Leonardo said.

“And the rest of you?”

“Me too!” Raphael piped

“Me three!” Michelangelo squeaked

Splinter’s tears almost turned to joy at the gentle realization. “Oh, that’s so good. So good. I’m so proud of you, boys...”

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt leo #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt raph #rottmnt splinter #turtle toys

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luci-in-trenchcoats · 4 years

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Strangers (Part 4)

Summary: Sam has returned into Dean’s life for some reason and the reader is there to try and help Dean through having Sam around again...

Masterlist

Pairing: Doctor!Dean x patient!reader

Word Count: 2,000ish

Warnings: language, mention of surgery/injury

A/N: I hope you enjoy!

____

“Hi,” said Sam, giving you a quick wave. He stared at Dean who was already on his feet. “I need a place to crash for the night. If that’s okay.”

“What happened to the apartment, you were sharing with that girl, Jessica.”

“She died a few years ago,” he said.

“You kill her?” asked Dean. You got up, still holding your box of swiss rolls and Sam frowned. “You’ve been out of touch for three years. It’s not an unreasonable question.”

“I didn’t kill her,” said Sam. “I saw...it was a serial arsonist. I saw who did it and he ran with a bad group. I’ve been in witness-”

“Witness protection? Are you serious? I’m the fucking easter bunny while we’re at it,” said Dean.

“De, I think he’s telling the truth,” you said, nodding towards him. “He’s obviously upset.”

“You’ve been in witness protection? This whole time?”

“Yes,” said Sam. “Things have been happening lately. A lot of things. These guys are no longer a problem so I can come home. Except for the fact I don’t have a home anymore and had to drop out of college.”

“I filed a missing persons report on you.”

“I know.”

“I hung up flyers, search parties, fundraisers.”

“I know.”

“I drove to the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night because I thought I got a tip about you.”

“That was me. I had to relocate after that.”

“I looked for you for so long. Even when mom and dad gave up, I didn’t. There was no foul play but the cops told us it was unlikely we’d ever find you. You probably walked out and didn’t want to be found. I was so angry at you. They told us you were dead cause someone hurt you or you walked away. Those are two very different things,” said Dean. You dropped the box on the couch and grabbed his hand, Dean pinching his nose with his other.

“I can leave if you want,” said Sam.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” said Dean. You rubbed his back and he walked over, giving his brother a hug.

“Finally got a girlfriend?” teased Sam as he returned it.

“You two are gonna get along great. You can swap stories,” laughed Dean. “Oh, I need a drink. Also how’d you get in my house?”

“My handler had a key made. They took it from your locker at the hospital,” he said.

“Lovely.”

“I know it sounds…” said Sam as he glanced at you.

“Crazy is kind of our thing,” you said. “I’m Y/N.”

“You look familiar,” he said.

“My ex boyfriend tried to kill me. With bleach. In my drink.”

“Oh yeah. He was fucking nuts,” said Sam.

“Yup. That’s been our fun for the evening,” you said. “He got out. He’s dead now. It’s fine. Better than fine cause I’m gonna eat a whole box of swiss rolls and not feel bad about that.”

“Yeah, I will get along with you just fine,” said Sam, giving Dean a look. “Not sure about you though. I wanted to-”

“S’okay,” he said. “I’m just...happy you don’t hate me after all.”

“I wanted to call you so many times. It was too dangerous though. I couldn’t put you in that position,” said Sam.

“I’m getting kind of used to that,” said Dean. Sam smiled and you walked over to them both.

“I crashed date night, didn’t I,” he said.

“Just a bit,” said Dean.

“Well I am really happy to meet Dean’s little brother,” you said, giving him a hug. “You don’t mind if Sam hangs out with us, right?”

“No, never. As long as you’re cool with it,” said Dean.

“Of course,” you said.

“I appreciate it but honestly I’m wrecked. I could use with a shower and a bed,” said Sam.

“The guest room is right down the hall,” said Dean, pointing the way. “You hungry?”

“Nah. I’ll keep out of your guys hair,” said Sam. “Thanks.”

“It’s no problem,” said Dean. Sam started to head for the hallway when Dean grabbed his arm. “I’m really happy you’re home, Sammy.”

“Me too.”

He smiled before he left, Dean taking a deep breath as he locked up the front door again.

“So you got a brother,” you said.

“Yeah. I probably should have brought him up at some point,” said Dean. You shrugged and rested your hands on his hips, Dean smiling softly. “I thought he was dead.”

“I’m glad he’s not,” you said. “I’m gonna have to back out on the being roommates thing though.”

“What?” he asked.

“Sam needs it way more than I do. I can stick around my parents until my apartment is ready. Seriously, it’s okay. He’s gonna need a lot of help. Trust me. He’s gonna want you,” you said.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. My parents aren’t that bad. Someday we can be roommates though?” you said.

“Okay. I’ll take a raincheck for now,” he smiled.

“Tonight’s not so bad,” you said. He nodded and you pulled him close to your body, Dean’s arms wrapping lazily around you. “You doing okay?”

“I’ve been the happiest I’ve ever been in my life, the most terrified I’ve ever been in my life and the most relieved I’ve ever been in my life tonight. I honestly don’t know where to begin,” said Dean.

“I got a box of chocolate with your name on it that might be a good place to start.”

“That sounds like a good plan,” he said. “You okay too?”

“My night’s ending on a good note. I’m good Dean. Let’s get back to our date. I was in the middle of cuddling you if I remember.”

One Week Later

“Howdy handsome,” you said, the elevator doors at the hospital opening to Dean standing there in his navy scrubs.

“Gorgeous,” he said, giving you a quick kiss as he stepped on. “You already have your follow up with Mace?”

“Yeah. I am progressing well I guess. We’re switching my immunosuppressant to try something that doesn’t make me as tired and won’t make me as susceptible to illness,” you said.

“That’s good. I know you’re on the strong stuff right now. Mace is pretty good about finding the right med combo by the second or third try,” he said. “Transplant meds are tricky.”

“I’ve learned. How’s your day going?” you asked. “Saving lives?”

“Easy going day. Took out some tonsils on a teenager, did an appendectomy on a toddler, did a bone reset on a kid that broke her leg. Nothing they won’t all recover from 100% percent.”

“That sounds good,” you said. “When do you get off?”

He snickered and you whacked his arm.

“Such a boy,” you said.

“I have one more surgery for the day but I’m heading home after that. Our parents are coming into town. They’ve been in Florida cause their vacation plans got screwed up with the pandemic last year so they rescheduled and of course it’s this week and there’s tropical storms so they can’t get a flight out and they finally are getting home today. It’s been a nightmare. I’m supposed to cook dinner so that’ll go wonderfully.”

“You’re a good cook!” you said as the doors opened and you walked with him down the hall. “You don’t give yourself enough credit. They excited to see Sam?”

“Yeah. They feel bad about...they thought he was dead. Like it hasn’t been long enough to legally declare him that way but they were going to. I’ve always had a somewhat tense relationship with my dad. We fought a lot about Sam after he disappeared.”

“I think no matter what happened before, dinner’s gonna go good for you guys tonight,” you said.

“You’re coming right?” he asked.

“You want me to?”

“Yeah. I...you make me feel...safe,” he said as he stopped walking. You smiled and grabbed his hand, lacing your fingers together. “You don’t have-”

“I’d love to. I really like Sam and I want to be there for you. I like that I make you feel safe, makes me feel good,” you said. He rubbed the back of his neck but you caught the smile on his face. You gave him another kiss, a whistle coming from further down the hall.

“Get a room, Winchester,” said a guy as he walked by with a laugh.

“Better be a soundproof room,” you said, the guy stopping in his tracks.

“Okay, I approve of this one,” the guy chuckled. Dean rolled his eyes but he was biting down a laugh.

“Y/N, this is RN. Lafetite or Benny as well call him. He’s Donna’s boyfriend,” said Dean.

“Oh yeah, she was great,” you said. “She removed my appendix.”

“That woman knows her way around a blade,” said Benny. “You had the digestive transplant done a while ago, right?”

“Yeah,” you said, Dean making a face beside you.

“Badass,” said Benny. “I worked with Mace some on you.”

“You’re a surgeon too?” you asked.

“No, no. I’m a surgical nurse,” he said.

“They’re pretty important,” said Dean. “The really good ones could perform minor surgeries themselves like Ben. I keep trying to convince Benny here to go to med school and join the rest of us.”

“Oh you know you’d miss me too much, Deano. You me and Novak are the dream team of pediatrics,” he said.

“Sure we are,” said Dean with a laugh. “Y/N and I were having a little get together on Sunday, watch a little football, food. Round up the usual suspects?”

“I can get the crew together. I’ll bring my beer dip and some of those pretzels. Very easy on the digestive system,” said Benny to you.

“That’s considerate,” you said. “It’s okay. I’m alright with most stuff. I just got to watch the grease a bit.”

“These are really not greasy at all. I’ll give you the recipe sometime,” said Benny as his phone went off. “I think we’re late for pre-op.”

“When are we not?” said Dean. “I’ll see you tonight, sweetheart.”

“See you later, Dean.”

“I’m so sorry I’m late,” said Dean that night as he rushed in the house. You and Sam were working the kitchen, Dean checking the clock. “They’re gonna be here in five minutes.”

“Go wash up. Sam and I can cook a few pieces of chicken and make mashed potatoes,” you said. You were nearly finished anyways, the chicken baking away in the oven. Dean made a thud down the hall but shouted back that he was fine before you heard the bathroom door shut. “He always been a worrier?”

“Pretty much,” said Sam as he got out the plates. “He seems different. Good different. More easy going.”

“It’s all I’ve ever known from him so I don’t have much to go off of,” you said.

“You might have something to do with it,” he said. He smiled and finished up with setting the table. “You’ve never met our parents Dean said.”

“No. We’ve only been together a few months,” you said.

“This’ll be an interesting evening then,” said Sam as the doorbell rang. He suddenly looked nervous and you rubbed a hand up and down his back.

“It’ll be okay,” you said. “Trust me.”

“I see why he likes you,” said Sam. “Here goes nothing.”

______

A/N: Read Part 5 here!

#dean winchester #supernatural #spn #dean x reader #spn reader insert #supernatural reader insert #au #doctor!dean #spn fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #dean winchester x reader

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iwantthedean · 4 years

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Ma’lak

Summary: Dean helps someone close to him lock away her demons. Pairing: Dean x Reader Word Count: 3130 Warnings: Canon divergence, implied smut, mental health issues, exorcism, angst. Square Filled: Late Night Call for @breakthezone Bingo (LOVE that I can tag now!) A/N: This was borne of a new thing I’m trying in trauma therapy. I hope you all can enjoy it, but please skip it if you think it might trigger you! This is a comfort for me, but I know it may not be that way for everyone. AKF/YANA. Huge thanks to @crispychrissy for making the ma’lak box GIF for me!! I appreciate it more than I can say! A/N2: You may see this again much later in a saga I’ve had running for several years now; that wasn’t how I started out with this in my head, but it quickly turned into that. Just putting that out there ;) If you think you know, shoot me a DM!

“I have an idea. Can you come get me?”

Dean was up and out of the bed in record time. “On my way. Stay there.”

As he pushed his feet into his boots, Dean’s mind raced. It was after midnight; he had been deep in thought about a recent case and hadn’t even realized he dozed off until the phone rang.

She had been on her own for months. Maybe even a year at this point? They talked at least once a month, but hadn’t seen each other since she left in the middle of the night — since Dean had let her go. Demons were dwelling within her and it took all of their strength and focus to keep them at bay. She had lashed out at all of them, more than once, and the last fight she and Dean had gotten into had almost come to blows; the thought of it made him sick to his stomach.

He put those memories and the bunker in his rearview mirror. A stop at the gas station put coffee in his hands and kept him going for the next few hours. Well, the coffee, and a couple rounds of Metallica’s best hits.

“Y/N?” he called after slamming the Impala’s door behind him. He walked carefully up to the isolated camper, catching that the door was slightly ajar. No lights were on and the place was deadly silent. He pulled the handgun from the back of his waistband and called for her again.

Still no answer. Carefully and silently opening the door, he aimed at the driver’s end of the camper, then back towards the bedroom — and right at Y/N.

“Fuck, Dean!” she hissed, pushing the gun away.

He rolled his eyes and clicked the safety before placing the gun on the counter. “You always leave your damn door open at all hours, Y/N/N? Any psycho would waltz in here and —”

“Don’t get your panties in a bunch, Dean. Oh, and check your phone every once in a while. I texted you and told you I’d leave the door open and the hideaway made up so you could crash when you got here. You know, so you wouldn’t wake me up.”

With an exhausted, ironic chuckle, Dean held out an arm and stepped closer to her, but then immediately stepped back. “How are you with physical contact these days?”

“Ha. The last time I had physical contact was the last time you and I had physical contact. I keep to myself. Safer that way.”

Y/N flipped on a dim light over the sink and pulled a plastic cup from the small cupboard, filling it with water. She motioned the cup toward Dean after she emptied it, but he shook his head. She shrugged and left the cup upside down in the sink. She offered coffee; that he took her up on.

As she moved about the camper, Dean now took notice of all the things the moonlight through the couple of windows hadn’t allowed him to see in the chaos of his entry.

Her thin-strapped, cotton nightgown hung to her curves and conjured up memories of his hands running over her curves, his lips on her bare skin — was it possible for her skin to be softer now than it had been before? Her hair was longer and, maybe because he was tired, but Dean was having a hard time not carding his hands through it and tugging just enough to pull a whimper from her perfect lips. He had expected those demons swimming within her being to make her harsher, worn out, tired. Maybe she was all of those things, but it didn’t show when he looked at her.

“Coffee’ll be ready in a few minutes.” She said, turning back to him from the small machine. “Dean? You okay?”

He nodded, clearing his throat. “Yeah, sorry. It’s just, you know — for hiding out for so long and keeping those demons maintained, you look — you look good, sweetheart.”

“You’re a sight for sore eyes yourself.” Y/N smirked and hopped up to the counter. She looked down at her hands as her expression grew somber; sorrowful. “I know that a lot of things have happened, that we said a lot of things. I said a lot of things. This whole thing has been … it’s driven me to be a person I never wanted to be or thought I would be. I didn’t think about the consequences before I did it, I only thought about keeping everyone else safe.”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, I guess me of all people, I can’t fault you for that.”

One end of her mouth tugged up. “Have you forgiven me for all the things I said to you? For how far I let it go before I left?”

He stepped up to the counter, gently pressing himself between her knees. He caressed her face with his rough hands — her skin was softer than he remembered — and pressed the ghost of a kiss to her forehead.

“The only thing I’ll never be able to forgive is myself for letting you stay away for so long.”

Y/N’s head fell, as did her tears. Dean’s hands went to her shoulders, pulling her to him. The top of her head butted against his chest. His hands fell down her arms, his thumbs rubbing over her forearms; on her left arm, he felt the scar of The Mark, the thing that had pulled her out of life. Pushed her out. Whatever it was, she had been gone and he had missed her.

Dean cupped her face again, forcing her to face him. Her eyes were red from the tears, but still the same color he had always been able to drown in. Even the quickest of looks from Y/N had commanded his heart to skip a beat, and he had missed that feeling, too.

She sniffled. “I really missed you, Dean.”

“Missed you, sweetheart.”

The words were uttered against her lips, hanging in the air even as he pressed his lips to hers for the first time in too long a time. She whimpered, not the way he had imagined a couple of minutes ago, but in a way that told him she honestly had missed him as much as he had missed her. Maybe even more. The kiss quickly deepened under the pressure of the chemistry between them; the connection that had always been there. Y/N’s arms wrapped around his middle, holding tight and pulling herself against him as her tongue searched out his.

The urge to touch her hair became a need Dean couldn’t ignore. His fingers slid into her hair at the root before his hands formed fists and he gave the slightest pull. Her whimper this time was exactly what he had wished to hear when he was imagining the scenario earlier.

She gripped his jacket lapel again and used it to push him out of kissing reach. Her chest was heaving, one strap of her nightgown had fallen down one shoulder. Her eyes were wide, filled with both fear and lust.

“What if I hurt you?” she whispered.

“If this is how I die,” Dean replied, tucking his fingers under the strap and kissing the top her shoulder before replacing the strap, “then this is how I die.”

Y/N giggle and kissed his cheek. “Then take me back to bed, Dean. It’s been too long.”

Dean tossed off his jacket before lifting her from the counter. He kissed her soundly as he worked them toward her bed, thinking he couldn’t agree with her more.

Their activities still allowed for a few hours of sleep before they were back on the road toward the bunker. Dean had pressed Y/N for what she had in mind, but she wouldn’t tell him. He didn’t like it, but memories of past arguments that had pushed her away stopped Dean from giving in to his tendency to push the issue.

By the time they neared the bunker, the tension was radiating off Y/N like steam and smoke from an overheated engine. Dean pulled the Impala up to the front door and turned off the engine.

“You ready to talk to me about this?”

“Sam called me once since I’ve been gone. He was panicked.” She swallowed so hard, he could hear it. “When Michael was still possessing you, when you didn’t think you were going to be able to stop him, you went away for a while. To Donna’s cabin.”

Dean shook his head. “No. Absolutely not.”

“Is the box still here?”

“No. Jack’s soul was gone, we tried to put him in the box, Lucifer got to him. He blasted the box.”

She nodded. “But you could make another one? You know how.”

Dean drew in a breath and shook his head. “That box is not an option. All right? Me going into the ocean with Michael, that’s one thing. You spending eternity with these demons, with that Mark, is not.”

She licked her lips. “What if it was only the demons and the Mark? What if we could lock them away?”

“How’re we gonna do that?”

“Are you going to help me make the box?”

He met her eyes for the first time since the conversation had started. He pressed his lips into a thin line and reached for the door handle.

“C’mon. Let’s get inside. Sammy’ll want to see you.”

Sam was just as perplexed as Dean as to what her plan was. Y/N was only sharing bits and pieces with them, promising that when the box was done and she was sure the plan could be executed, she would tell them more.

Dean set to work right away. If there was something that was going to make this all go away, he wasn't going to be the one standing in the way of it. Y/N had promised him that if this worked, maybe they could put the whole thing behind them. She could come home and they could start new. He held on to that promise as he worked to complete the Ma’lak box.

The assignment she had for Sam was less physically exhausting, but still exhausting nonetheless. As far as Sam could find, there was nothing that would allow the Mark or even solely its effects from someone to be locked away for all of eternity.

“The Mark has to have a host.” Sam shrugged and pushed away the thick book in front fo him. “If there was an answer, Y/N/N, we would have found it when Dean had the thing. Before Amara, before — okay, well, a lot of things that you don’t need recounted.”

“Yeah, thanks for that. The difference, Sam, is that I didn’t take this. I — okay, you know how it happened, and I won’t recount that for you, either. Favor returned. My point is, if I didn’t ask for it, why do I have to keep it? Why couldn’t I force it out?”

Sam licked his lips. “I don’t think it works like that. And — and ‘force it out’? Listen, I want this to be over just as much as you and Dean do. I do. But I think you’re getting your hopes up about something that isn’t gonna work. I haven’t heard it from your mouth but I think I get where you’re going with this and I don’t think it’s gonna work. I don’t see how.”

Y/N looked around before taking the seat across from Sam and taking in a breath. She licked her lips and looked him in the eye.

“You still feel the demon blood in your soul sometimes,” Y/N stated. “You have dark moments, especially moments of anger, when you want to pull from that power. You want that darkness to take root and grow. You want it to be a part of you still.”

Sam stood from the table. “Stop it.”

Y/N stood, too. “I live with that darkness, multiplied by numbers we don’t comprehend, every day, Sam, and I keep it at bay. I’m that strong — strong enough to command this darkness out of me.”

His shoulder’s rolled back before he turned to her. “But how?”

Y/N’s hand raised, palm up, level with her waist. She curled her fingers up, and Sam felt his soul squeeze. He could breath, his heart rate increased only a few beats, but he could feel the last effects of the demon blood leaving his soul, his veins, his muscles. His whole being.

Black smoke started to appear between them, plumes shooting out in every directions. Sam’s brow furrowed, but Y/N’s face stayed calm and stoic. When he could feel no lingering drops in his system, Y/N still held the dark, polluted smoke between them, but pulled it closer to herself, until the smoke had disappeared into her body in much the same spot as it had been pulled from Sam’s body.

His jaw dropped. “How did you do that?”

She shook her head. “I don’t know. One I day, I was in town to get groceries. There was a dark streak in this little boy and I thought about everything we’ve all been through, and I wished that I could take it away. I saw him again in the parking lot, and I had the thought again and that streak started to draw out of him, like I did with you. I’ve been working with it, strengthening the ability. I can take in small darknesses, like that one from that little boy, and pull it out later. But I’ve been letting them back out into the open. My own demons, the Darkness locked within The Mark? I can’t let those out into the open.”

“That’s why you need the box,” Sam surmised, “to lock them away.”

“I don’t know how else to do this,” she returned. “I can’t keep living like this. I finally had a family, and this bullshit took it away from me. I’m not going to take that laying down.”

Sam drew in a deep breath and gave a single nod. “Okay. Well, the lore isn’t going to help us. What else can I do?”

Y/N licked her lips. “If things go south — if I’m wrong about this — don’t let Dean came after me. Whether I’m alive or dead, you’ve got to keep him from coming after me. I don’t want him to come after me. No deals, no spells, nothing. This is my only option and if it doesn’t work …”

Sam stepped slowly towards her, remembering that sudden movements could sometimes trigger her. He reached his arms out, and Y/N accepted the hug he was offering.

Dean ran his hand over a warding on the box, brushing away some dust. He licked his lips and stood back.

“All right. I made the box. Now what?”

Y/N exchanged a glance with Sam, who gave her an encouraging nod. She told Dean about the little boy, about the dark pieces she had been pulling from people, and then from herself.

He raised his brow. “So, you want to exorcise yourself?”

“Essentially, yes,” Y/N answered quietly. “I know that it sounds crazy. I know that but if this is even potentially an option, I have to try it. If I don’t try this, or hell, if it doesn’t work, I don’t know how much longer … I just have to try.”

Dean’s eyes glassed over as he considered the part of the sentence she had left unsaid. “So, if this works, we get you back?”

Y/N shrugged. “As far as I can tell. I’ll be back to being me, anyway, and if you want me back, I’ll come back.”

“If,” Dean snorted. “Okay. Let’s do it.”

“I need you to open the box. And to close it when I tell you.”

Sam nodded. “We can do that.”

“Okay.”

Latin words dribbled from her lips in the form of a whisper as she placed her hands on the front of her ribcage, fingers sprawled. She closed her eyes as she continued to say the words.

When the words stopped, Y/N opened her eyes and set her jaw. She moved her hands slowly forward, pulled plumes of black smoke from her body. Agonized screams and angry growling accompanied the smoking, growing louder the further her hands moved out in front of her. The brothers could see her struggling to stay with it, but neither of them moved for fear of hindering the process.

She gasped in relief when the last plume joined with the others and she pushed the thick, black smoke into the Ma’lak box. The screams grew louder; Sam covered his hands with his ears to ward away the screeching. Dean stood firm at the lid of the box though, waiting for Y/N’s signal.

“Now!”

Dean let the lid slam shut before he quickly latched the locks. As soon as the box was secure, he turned to Y/N where she was on her knees on the floor.

“Hey, c’mon, you’re all right,” he encouraged, pulling her into an embrace. “Y/N, look at me. Tell me what’s going on.”

She leaned into his shoulder. “They’re gone. They’re all gone.”

Dean took her left arm and checked; the Mark was still there. “Y/N …”

“I know,” she answered, pulling her arm away from his grip, “but The Darkness is not in here. If that box is opened, she’ll come back. In the meantime, it’s like — it’s like an abandoned house. As far as I can tell.”

Dean’s head fell back in relief as Y/N continued to lean on him while she regained her strength. Sam went for a glass of water, which seemed to help.

“So where do we drop the box?” Sam asked.

Y/N shook her head. “I don’t want to know. If I feel the pull, I don’t want to know where to go looking. You take it, make sure it’s secure, and drop it somewhere I won’t think to look.”

Sam and Dean both agreed, but they weren’t about to take the box anywhere until they knew for sure she was good. A quick call to Donna and Jody had the two sheriffs making plans to come get the box soon and drop it somewhere none of the three of them would know to look.

Dean picked Y/N up off the ground, kissing her temple before pressing his cheek to hers. He knew that she might be able to walk by now, but, after everything they had been through, he needed to take care of her for a while, for his own sake if not for hers.

The Whole Shebang: @illisea @ashleymalfoy @mrswhozeewhatsis @ravenesque @feelmyroarrrr @atc74 @blacktithe7 @moonlessnight14 @kitchenwitchsuperwhovian @smoothdogsgirl @melbrandes @emoryhemsworth @deansgirl215 @calaofnoldor @sleepylunarwolf @chances-and-miracles @sandlee44 @foxyjwls007 @deanwanddamons @carryonwaywardkansas

Two for the Money: @jayankles @akshi8278 @adoptdontshoppets @jerkbitchidjitassbutt

#BTZ Bingo #dean winchester #dean #reader insert #dean x reader #dean winchester x reader #late night call #ma'lak box #iwantthedeanupdates #iwantthedean's tag team #all my lovelies

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wannawritefast · 3 years

Text

Whiplash: Ch. 3- Practicing

A/N: Thank you for your kind words, lovelies! I really appreciate you guys engaging with my work.

Pairing: Gwilym Lee! Brian May x Reader

Pt. 2

Warnings: Mild language, alcohol, again... mentions of Stupid Men... fluffy??? kinda???

You and Brian had worked out that you would split the holiday between your families: Christmas with yours and New Year’s with his. Although you had confirmed with your parents and brother that you did, in fact, have a (fake) boyfriend and, yes, you were bringing him for Christmas, that didn’t make you any less nervous. You weren’t entirely certain you could even pull it off.

Brian suggested acting as if the two of you were a couple before you left for holiday. Just so it would be easier to play the part later.

The whole experience gave you metaphorical whiplash. It wasn’t because of any drastic changes in behavior. It was quite the opposite actually.

There wasn’t a massive change in how the two of you interacted. Sure, there was a little more couple-y PDA. But there was no other change in how he addressed you or interacted with you. That was what was most alarming. And, boy, did people buy it…

“Brian, I can’t just buy cereal for dinner.” You tidily placed the box of sugary carbs back on the shelf with a pointed look at the curly-haired man and continued pushing your trolley. Brian followed closely behind but not before plucking the box off of the spot you had placed it on, unbeknownst to you.

Brian underhand tossed the cereal over your head and it landed in the trolley with a clang. You could practically hear the defiance echo through the metal after the brightly colored box cut majestically through the fluorescent lighting. If you weren’t so taken aback, you would have been impressed with the aim.

You halted and immediately looked at your faux boyfriend. There he was, whistling and inspecting another box of cereal with trained attention. You plucked the box out of the trolley and tried to stroll past him but the box slipped out of grasp suddenly.

You whirled around and saw the cereal box in the hand of your favorite curly-haired guitarist. Brian shook it victoriously with a brow raised in challenge and you narrowed your eyes, determined. Oh, if he wanted to play… you could play.

All Brian had to do was hold the box straight in the air while you jumped up desperately trying to reach it. He even taunted you a few times lowering his arm just enough but raising it again when you got close.

“Brian,” you whined exasperatedly. Trying to be angry at him was much too hard when he was chuckling at you with that cocky smile on his face. “Give it back!”

“No way!” He replied. “You’re very cute right now, did you know?”

You rolled your eyes but didn’t relent. And you certainly didn’t let him see the blush spreading on your face. “I see we’re trying to charm our way out of trouble again.”

“Ah, indeed I am,” Brian affirmed with a cheeky smile. You kept hopping up to reach it. You would have to work smarter not harder. “Is it working?”

You huffed a few times, beginning to tire, and blew a strand of hair out of your face and ceased all jumping. He cocked his head in confusion and you pressed a peck to his cheek. Now it was his turn to be stunned.

Brian’s guard was down and you swiftly pulled the cereal box out of his hand. While he was still in shock you tucked the box into your torso and moved to run back to the spot where you had found it, not unlike a rugby player.

You made it about half way there before long arms locked around yours and stopped you. You squealed in surprise and Brian spun you around dramatically from behind. The cereal remained in your vice-like grip but Brian wasn’t letting go any time soon either. His laugh was right next to your ear and yours joined in.

“You kids are so cute.” A brittle voice sounded from behind you.

You and Brian immediately halted your antics, unraveling yourselves, and stood stiffly next to each other like two kids who had been caught red-handed. Your arm swung the cereal box roughly into Brian’s chest and he grunted. You blurted out an apology.

“No, don’t stop on my account.” An older woman shakily supported herself on her trolley. Her hair was white and her knuckles were knobby and her back was hunched but she smiled sweetly at the two of you.

“I remember when my Harold and I were that young,” she rasped. The woman put her hand on the middle of her chest. You giggled sheepishly to diffuse the awkwardness. “It seems like just yesterday that we-”

“Marianne!” An older man yelled a little too loudly from the end of the aisle.

“I’m right here,” she answered. Harold hobbled over to where she was and put two boxes of chocolate biscuits in the trolley. “Harold, we have biscuits at home, luv.”

“But not the good kind,” he groused.

“We bought them yesterday, darling,” Marianne explained. “They’re blueberry. We only bought them because you said you wanted them. I don't even like blueberry.”

“Well, I changed my mind. I want chocolate biscuits now.”

Marianne rolled her eyes. “You do this every time. It’s wasteful. We’re not getting the biscuits.” She began waddling away still muttering to herself with the trolley after placing the biscuits on the shelf next to her.

Harold watched her with a frown on his face. After making sure that she was no longer paying attention to him, he mischievously put a finger to his lips and shushed you and Brian. You put a hand over your mouth to stifle your laughter. He grabbed the boxes off of the shelf and marched slowly but surely after her.

“My God…” Brian muttered after Harold was out of earshot. “It’s like looking in a mirror.”

You hiccuped on your laughter as you watched Marianne scold Harold from the other end of the aisle. “You think so?” You asked.

He hummed contemplatively. “I’m about 80% certain.”

“Only 80%?”

“Yeah, I figure if you don’t murder me before we reach that age, I’ll actually outlive you.”

“Oh, really,” you laughed. “And why would I commit such a heinous act?”

“Because of this.” Before you had a chance to stop him, Brian took his arm and scooped approximately seven boxes of that godforsaken cereal from earlier into his chest and shot toward the basket. He dumped the boxes haphazardly into the trolley and began pushing it away like a mad man.

He made it to end of the aisle and made sure you saw him drift the cart as he turned into the next aisle.

A child… You were fake dating an actual child.

[{...}]

The following weekend your sister came into the city to visit you. When she had originally planned to visit you, you had been sans fake boyfriend. But since you had made the arrangement with Brian, she was much more excited than she had been initially.

Donna took to temporarily living in your flat with extreme comfort. Your cat certainly enjoyed having another person around to dote on him and you certainly enjoyed having someone else to talk to. Brian was a great friend, er, fake boyfriend but it was nice to have another friendly face around.

Having your sister over meant showing her how you lived and taking her to the places that you usually went and that included seeing Queen play a gig.

With an ale in hand, you headed backstage little sister in tow. The people guarding the doors knew you by name and let you pass. Following intuitively the layout of how most pub stages worked (you had been to plenty of Brian’s gigs before to understand) you navigated your way to where the band was backstage.

“Hey,” you bumped Brian with your shoulder who was turned around, tuning his red guitar.

Brian immediately smiled upon recognizing you. Instead of greeting you with a side hug, he took the mug out of your hand with a ‘for me?’ and began chugging it.

“Hey!” You scolded. You grabbed at your mug but by the time you got your fingers around it, half of your ale was gone.

“That was really good, thank you!”

You kept a tight grip on your mug in case he was getting any ideas about continuing his antics. “I asked if you wanted one!”

“I changed my mind.” He shrugged. “Plus, it tastes better when it’s yours.”

“So you just decided to drink my mug half-empty?!”

“I prefer to look at it as half-full,” a smile spread across his face. Cocky bastard. You batted your palm toward his shoulder and he laughed gleefully at your reaction. Brian caught your wrist mid-swing and halted your assault. You paused standing as still as Brian was.

“If you wanted me to grab you one, you should have told me,” you spoke gently, suddenly calm for some odd reason. “I offered to get you one.”

He still had his hand on your wrist. It wasn’t tight but the contact was there.

“I might take you up on that after the show,” Brian contemplated. He slid his hand down to hold yours and swung your arm playfully. “Thank you for letting me have some of your drink-”

“I didn’t really have much choice in the matter.” The lights on stage slowly turned on.

Someone cleared their throat next to you and you suddenly remembered that your sister was, in fact, present as well. Brian let go of your hand gently and turned to face her.

“Donna,” she supplied with an extended hand. Brian shook her hand firmly with a smile.

“Brian,” he answered politely, “it’s nice to finally put a face to the great ‘Donna.’”

“Likewise. My sister and I don’t get to meet up often but when we do, she does NOT shut up about you,” she looked at you with a giggle.

Your sister really loved digging you into holes, didn’t she? You gave her a pointed look. The realization of her lack of filter dawned on her suddenly.

“Not that she doesn’t talk about other things! She talks about you a normal amount. Definitely not obsessively or anything like that!” She rushed out her words in a poor attempt to fix what she had said. Donna smiled at you like she had smoothed everything over.

“Please make me sound more creepy, Donna.” You iterated through gritted teeth.

Brian chuckled. “Aw, you couldn’t be creepy if you tried.”

“Thank you, Brian.”

“Maybe a tad pathetic,” he joked with a grin. “A little sad, perhaps.”

“Yeah?” You lightly smacked his arm. He laughed in response. “Keep talking, poodle.”

Roger jogged up to the two of you. “Hey, Y/n,” he greeted with a charming look. The drummer clapped his friend on the shoulder. “We’re about to go on.” Roger suddenly noticed Donna next to you and turned up the charm. “Hello there. I’m Roger.” He extended his hand toward hers.

Donna smiled back at him and grasped his hand as she introduced herself. “You must be the drummer.”

“You’re a smart girl, how’d you know?”

“You’ve got drumsticks sticking out of your pocket.” She explained. “I have good eyes.”

“They’re beautiful, too.”

You rolled your eyes and groaned. But neither your sister nor Roger heard you. Your sister giggled and twirled the end of her hair around her finger.

Not this… anything but this…

Brian chuckled and put an arm over your shoulders. He rubbed the side of your arm. The body of his guitar lightly rested against your side.

“I’d be more than happy to give you some private drumming lessons after the set.” Roger took the drumsticks out of his pocket and twirled one of them skillfully in his fingers. “How’s that sound?”

Before she could get another word out you interjected, “Yeah, that’s not happening. Turn it around and march it away, Rog.”

Roger faced you with a scoff. “But-”

“Did I stutter? Move it along, casanova.”

“Y/n!” Your sister scolded incredulously.

But you didn’t pull your gaze from Roger. You narrowed your eyes at him as he defiantly pressed his lips together. “Fine.” Roger stalked away.

“Are you kidding me, Y/n?!” you sister asked. “He was cute.”

“He does this with literally every girl, Donna.”

“Whatever.”

Brian turned back to directly face you and pulled his arm from your shoulder. “Anyways, I’ll take you up on that drink offer after the show, darling.”

If trying to repress your blush from his pet name wasn’t enough, he grabbed your open hand suddenly, pressed an exaggerated kiss to the back of it, and let it drop to your side. Brian walked to the huddle, leaving you dumbstruck with a half-finished mug of ale and an irritated younger sister.

It took you a moment to come back to reality and go back into the fray to watch the show.

[{...}]

The set ran unbelievably smooth. But to be fair, they usually played without any noticeable mistakes.

As per routine, you went out with the band to get drinks and you did, in fact, buy Brian a drink. He claimed to have been joking but you still got him a mug of ale.

The two of you together waited for the round that you were covering at the bar.

“How was the set?” Brian asked, leaning sideways against the bar and facing you.

“Horrible,” you sighed exaggeratedly. Brian’s eyebrows shot up. “I’m kidding. It was wonderful as usual.” You patted his cheek affectionately. He gnashed his teeth at your hand as you pulled it away.

He glanced over his shoulder at the table where the rest of the band, Mary, your sister, and a groupie were sitting. Your eyes followed his quick glance.

“And what’d your sister think?” He asked.

“Still a little cross at me for preventing the Roger situation. She’ll get over it by the morning though and-”

Brian cut you off. He turned back to you, looking down and fiddling with his fingers. “No, darling. Not about Roger. What’d she think of the music? Me?”

You smiled at Brian. He was nervous. There was certainly no need to be. “Donna loves you, Brian. And she loves Queen.”

“Really?” He questioned. “You’re not just saying that? I want to make a good first impression.”

“No,” you exclaimed assuredly. You grabbed hold of his hand. “She’s really impressed with you guys.” Brian let out a casual sigh of relief, feigning no big deal, but you knew better. “It’s impossible for people not to like you, Bri. What are you so worried about?”

Brian inhaled like he was going to speak but the bartender set down mugs on the counter for you to take. Only half of the round. You asked Brian to wait for the other half of the order and you walked to the table with the first half only to find your sister and Roger heatedly arguing. Freddie was leaned against Mary in amusement and John was fiddling with his wallet in his hands as if this was a common occurrence.

“Are you joking?!” Roger exclaimed. “Have you seen the way they look at each other?”

“I think I know my sister. Now pull your head out of your ass before I kick something else in that region, prat.”

“I know Brian.” Roger iterated. “I’m not a dimwit like you.”

“Perhaps your drums have affected your hearing so I’ll say it slower and louder,” Donna leaned forward exaggeratedly and Roger rolled his eyes angrily as the groupie sat back with her arms crossed, simultaneously irritated by the lack of attention and overwhelmed by the anger. “BRIAN. AND. MY. SISTER. ARE NOT DATING. Okay. Do I need to write it down for you too?!”

“No!-”

“Good!” She brought her mug of ale to her lips. “Its not like you’d be able to read it anyways.”

Roger weakly mocked her by leaning forward childishly and imitating her voice before retorting. “You don’t see what we see on a regular basis. You’re just visiting.”

“I’m her sister, you wanker! She tells me everything.”

Brian appeared next to you with the mugs in hand. You had been frozen to the spot in shock and amusement of the situation. “What did I miss?” He asked from the corner of his mouth.

“Look! They’re right here,” Donna turned to you and gestured her arm at you. “Why don’t we ask them, hmm? Are you or are you not dating?”

You and Brian looked at each other momentarily before beginning to stammer.

“Well, technically-”

“-it’s for a challenge with-”

“-and we’re staying the holidays with each others’ families-”

Roger halted the two of you assertively. “Wait, so you are?”

“No…” Brian’s voice went high in consideration. “Not technically.”

“How do you mean?”

You handed out the mugs as Brian and you explained what was going on. You both sat down in the booth with you in between him and your sister; Brian rested his arm on the top of the booth behind your shoulders as you leaned comfortably against his side. Roger sat scrutinizing the backstory and the explanation.

“Let me get this straight,” Roger shifted in his seat and gestured to you and the guitarist, “The two of you are fake dating over the holidays because your brother,-” he switched to gesture between you and your sister “-amongst other male members of your family, is a pillock who won’t leave you alone unless you’re dating someone even though you’re more than adequate without a boyfriend. No offense, Bri.”

“None taken,” Brian shrugged and took a drink from his beer.

“Did I get it right?”

You and Donna looked at each other for a moment before nodding at each other. You turned to Roger. “Yep.”

Roger, with his sunglasses on, nodded at you and Brian for a moment and finally put his arm around the groupie. “Yeah, and what‘re the two of you going to do once the holidays are over?”

You were taken aback for a moment. Brian and you suddenly looked at each other, both startled. You stopped leaning on him. Neither of you had considered what would happen after the holidays.

Brian scratched the back of his head and took a swig of his beer before answering, “Well, I suppose we go back to normal. Being friends. All that.” He took another swig of his beer.

You hummed in agreement and took a big gulp of the alcohol in front of you. “Yeah. We’ll go back to how it was before this arrangement or whatever you want to call it.”

Donna scoffed to herself. “Have you met our family? If Brian comes out alive, he certainly won’t come back normal.”

“He’ll be fine. They deal with crazy fans every weekend. It’ll be a walk in the park.” You leaned into his side again.

“What if it doesn’t work,” Mary inquired sweetly. “I mean, I hope it does for your sake but on the off chance it doesn’t…”

“It just has to.” You answered with a shrug. “I have faith in us.” Brian brought his arm down to rest on your shoulders and he rubbed your arm.

“Well, what if it does work?” The blonde drummer asked. You cocked your head in confusion.

“How do you mean?”

“What if it works a little too well and they end up really liking him? What are you going to do next year?” Roger asked.

John spoke up too. “Yeah, what are you going to say if they ask about him again and want him to visit with you?”

You were beginning to panic. There was so much you hadn’t thought about. “I’m just trying to get through this year’s holidays. We’ll worry about the rest later.” You polished off the rest of your drink. You needed to get away from the table suddenly; the urge to vomit was bubbling in your chest. You put on a polite smile. “I need to use the loo. Anyone coming with me? Donna? Mary?”

Brian slid off the bench to let you out and you briskly began walking to the restrooms with Mary and Donna in tow.

You threw the door open and took pacing steps. “What have I gotten myself into?” Donna and Mary stepped into the bathroom, watching your distress. “Roger was right. I didn’t think this through at all. My god, what have I done? What if this doesn’t work? What if James doesn’t believe me? Or Dad? Or Granddad?”

“Hey…” Donna began. But you were too wrapped up in your thoughts. You fiddled with the ends of your hair.

“Oh goodness, what if this does work?! What if they want to keep seeing him? We can’t fake date forever! Brian has a life ahead of him. He doesn’t need to waste time on helping me with my stupid family.” You froze in your tracks as your stomach dropped. “What if Brian and I aren’t friends after this?”

Out of all of the logistical worries and stresses, there was nothing more terrifying than not having Brian in your life. You couldn't bear it if you ruined the friendship between the two of you.

“You’re worrying over nothing, dear,” Mary urged. She stepped forward and pulled you into a warm hug. “One thing at a time, remember? Just like you said at the table.”

You nodded and took a deep breath. Mary was right.

Your stomach lurched suddenly. You ran to the nearest bathroom stall and emptied your alcohol-filled stomach. You’d had quite a few beers since the evening began, even before Queen’s set. Maybe your nerves had been a result of your drunken state… You were drained all of a sudden.

“I think,” Donna pushed open the stall door behind you, “that’s our cue to leave.”

“God, Donna, I’m sorry.” You clutched your forehead. “I know you don’t want to be dealing with hungover-me when you’re visiting.”

“It’s alright,” your sister grabbed your upper arm and guided you up from the floor. “Let’s go.”

You waddled out of the bathroom with a headache pounding behind your eyes and a dizzying ringing in your ears. The two of you headed to the booth together; the after effects were hitting you hard and fast and you were beginning to wonder if you had a touch of food poisoning. You leaned over the back of the booth with your head hidden in the crook of your arm while Donna grabbed your bags.

“Are you alright,” Brian’s voice asked. Everything was much too loud. The music playing. The people chattering. The drinks clinking. The chairs scraping. Your stomach tossed again but you repressed the reflex with a deep breath.

You shot a thumbs up to him before quietly saying that you had thrown up. You were feeling seriously under the weather.

You felt a hand on your back, Brian’s. “Let me walk you and Donna home.”

“It’s alright, Brian,” you began. It was worth a shot to not pull Brian away from spending time with the band. Deep down you knew he was going to insist on walking you home; he always did. “I don’t want to stop you from having a good time.”

“I’m not going to take ‘no’ for an answer.” Of course he wasn’t. “You and Donna both have alcohol in your system. No good time is worth your safety on the line,” he spoke gently. You leaned on him as he put his arm under yours to support you upright. “Alright, let’s go.”

“I’ve got our bags,” Donna affirmed gently.

You waved a vague goodbye at the table and there was a hum of ‘goodbyes’ as you left with Brian and Donna.

You arrived clumsily at your flat, to the simultaneous excitement and dismay of your cat. He immediately yelled at you for food after yelling at you in greeting. Brian went to feed him as Donna walked you to your bedroom.

Brian, on many separate occasions, although an animal lover, claimed not to be particularly fond of cats. And just as many times as he had said that he didn’t like them, you had caught him baby talking, petting, and even cradling your cat. Not fond of them, your ass… Brian stood in the doorway with your furry baby draped over his shoulder.

Donna helped you clean your face and tucked you into bed. You apologized to her and Brian once again. They both hummed that it was alright.

“You’re sure?” You asked groggily, already feeling sleep tugging at your consciousness.

“Yes,” Brian answered. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I’ll make it up to you. Both of you, I promise.” You slurred.

“It’s alright.”

“Breakfast tomorrow morning and we’ll call it even,” Donna bargained.

“Deal. To both of you,” you agreed through a yawn. “Okay. I love you both. Good dreams.”

You were so tired that you turned on your side and fell asleep almost immediately. You missed Brian set your cat on the bed. And adjust the blanket over your shoulder. And whisper ‘I love you too’ back.

But Donna didn’t miss it. Not at all.

TAGS:

@phantoms-lynn @andtheswordwentsnickersnack

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cordonian-literature · 4 years

Text

The Aftermath - Ch. 31

The Talk

Summary: Riley and Liam talk about what’s next for them, and Drake finally confronts Jessica

Word Count: ~2.7k

Warnings: mention of character death, slight language, implied smut

*All characters belong to Pixelberry, except those that are unique to my story (I’ve also used some characters and fictional instances from Donna Tartt’s book, “The Goldfinch”)*

Catch up here!

Tags: @captain-kingliamsqueen @gkittylove99 @lovablegranny @iam-the-kind-and-thoughtful @mom2000aggie @kingliam2019 @queenrileyrose @shanzay44 @cordonianroyalty @hopefulmoonobject @hopelessromanticmonie @twinkle-320 @charlotteg234 @amandablink @texaskitten30 @queencatherynerhys @pens-girl-87 @ladyangel70 @sanchita012 @cordonianprincess @liamandneca @cordonia-gothqueen @pink-diamond13 @queenwalton @yourmajesty09 @alj4890

I don’t know if the tags are working or not, but I hope I got everyone down. If you would like to be added/removed, let me know :)

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

- Riley -

I wake by the morning light that blares through the window. After blinking for a few moments, I slowly take in the room around me. I see my luggage near the far corner, and there are clothes littered on the floor. The covers of the bed are dangling off the edge. Liam is on the bed with me. His head rests on my stomach and his arms are loosely around me. His face is an image of pure peace.

I wonder what time it is. Turning my head, I can see that my phone isn’t near me. I look again at Liam, sleeping soundly, and I don’t want to wake him.

I shift my upper body, trying to lean down to see if my phone was on the floor. But I move a bit too much, and Liam wakes. He rubs his eyes, then turns his head slowly, kissing my stomach and all the way up to my lips.

“Good morning,” I say to him when we part. His blond hair is a whorl on his head and there’s a content smile on his face.

I get out of bed and find my phone under my discarded dress. Checking the time, I see that it’s almost noon. I put it on the bedside table and begin picking up the clothes scattered on the floor.

“What are you doing, love?” Liam asks, reaching for me. He lightly takes hold of my elbow and draws me back towards the bed. I let myself fall into his warm embrace. “I’d like to stay here with you forever,” he whispers in my ear.

“I would, too, but we already missed breakfast. Plus the kids might be worried.”

Liam kisses my temple. Neither of us move to get out of bed. A part of me doesn’t want to move. Liam’s embrace felt peaceful and safe. It was refreshing in a way. It was like I had found my way home.

We stare at the ceiling, disregarding the time pass by.

“The Anointing Ceremony is tomorrow,” Liam speaks.

“I know,” I respond. “My mother said she’s going to fly over for it. And Gabe said he was having a bit of anxiety.”

“I’ll be sure to make accommodations for your mother. As for Gabriel, I’ll speak to him. I know he’ll be perfect.” He pauses for a second. “There is also something that I wish to ask your mother.”

“What do you want to ask her?”

He gives a low chuckle. Liam meets my eyes, but says nothing. His silence gives me his answer.

“You said you wanted me to give you until the end of the Social Season,” I state. “Well, there’s barely two days left.” He laughs again. “Is there something you want to ask me?” I manage to say through a smile.

He looks away for a moment. I’m still tucked under his arm and glued to his side. “Perhaps there is something I wish to ask you, but this was not the position I had planned.”

“Really? Then what did you have planned?”

“I thought I’d bring you to the hedge maze.”

“The same one that Ella got lost in?”

“Well, I would make sure the children were safe before we’d go. There’s a well I wish to show you.”

“And what would we do at the well?”

His gaze is intense. His eyes aren’t as tired as usual, compared to these past few weeks. I lean forward and press my lips against his.

“Riley,” he says, making my body shiver. I push myself closer to him. “You torture me.”

I rest my head on his shoulder. His arms wrap tightly around me. “I’ve been torturing myself, too. Ten whole years.” I trail off, feeling uneasy.

“It took us ten years to make our way back to each other,” Liam says gently. “And now that I have you, I don’t want to lose you. Or Gabriel, or Eleanor.”

“I don’t want you to lose us, either.”

He kisses me again, then moves away suddenly. “Would your mother be okay with that?”

I give out a laugh. “What does she have to do with it?”

“She was quite hostile when we were in New York. Whenever I’d mention anything about our relationship she wouldn’t hesitate to remind me how I failed you.”

“But you didn’t fail me. Both of us made mistakes. I just want to leave it in the past.”

We snuggle closer to each other. Liam smothers my face in soft kisses. “Riley Brooks,” he whispers. “My queen.”

My heart flutters a little. We stay like that for a little while longer before deciding it would be better to get out of bed and check on the kids. We dress quickly, stealing kisses every other moment, and walk out of the room hand in hand.

The estate is quiet and practically empty. Most of the court had already left or were still asleep. At the bottom of the stairs, servants are cleaning up the mess from last night. Bertrand supervises them, watching their every move. When Liam and I pass by, Bertrand glances at our hands, then at Liam, and finally gives us a wide smile.

In the dining room, Gabe and Bartie play a game on one of Gabe’s devices, leaning close to the small screen with small controllers in their hands. Eleanor and Hana are going through a simple ballet routine, laughing and clapping for each other. When Ella sees us she rushes over to give Liam a hug, who lifts her into his arms. Gabe is still focused on his game but gives us a quick “hi”.

I ask Hana were Maxwell and Rowan are, but she says she hasn’t seen them since last night.

“What about Drake? Or Olivia? Or Boris?”

“I saw Drake leave the estate a few hours ago,” Hana tells me. “Olivia and Boris I saw during the party, but not this morning.”

With Ella still in his arms, Liam makes his way over to Gabe and Bartie, asking about the game they’re playing. Hana pulls me to the side.

“I have news,” she states, a wide smile across her face. It’s one that I recognize. I haven’t seen it in a while, but I knew there was only one thing that would make her this happy. “Neville signed the papers last night.”

“What!” I cry. Hana nods and laughs. I give her a tight hug. “Took you long enough to get rid of him!”

“I know!” Her smile falters a little. “I haven’t told my parents yet.”

“I’m sure they’ll understand. And don’t worry, I’ll be here for backup.”

She gives a smile, then asks, “Now what about you and Liam?”

A wide grin spreads across my face. “We talked.”

“And...?” Hana urges me to continue.

“And... I decided that I want to stay in Cordonia. With him, Gabe, Ella, and all our friends.”

Hana gives me an amused look. “So you’re saying...”

“It’s technically unofficial... but yes.”

Hana squeals and we share a hug. Servants walk into the room, putting plates on the tables. Savannah and Bertrand enter, and we all sit down for lunch.

Bertrand asks me the same question Hana did, and he and Savannah give me quiet congratulations. Gabe and Ella talk excitedly about some other topic, and Liam matches their enthusiasm.

Before, looking at them interacting like this had made me upset. It reminded me of everything that I had kept from them. But now I feel the opposite; even though they had spent more time away from each other than together, there was the undeniable care and affection that the children had for Liam, and that he had for them. It was the way it should have been from the start, and knowing that there was no longer anything that could change it, I feel at peace.

- Drake -

Jessica had left Ramsford in the early morning. She left Drake a note, claiming she had plans to meet up with friends. Drake suspected that he knew what that meant. Two hours after he woke up, he received a text from her:

plans canceled :( come meet me, let’s have lunch xx

Once he read the message, Drake was sure that her “plans” had probably been with Boris, who was still locked in a bedroom somewhere in the estate.

Drake hadn’t told anyone what he had discovered about Jessica, not even Savannah. He wondered if Olivia had gotten more information out of Boris. Drake didn’t want to go see Jessica. He knew there was nothing she could do to make him angrier, but he needed answers.

Even with the doubts, he drives over to her apartment in the capital. His mind is numb while he drives. Drake can’t bring himself to focus on the present moment, and almost swerved into ongoing traffic more than once. But he finally made it to her apartment and got out of his car.

As he walked through the lobby and down the hall towards her room, he kept reminding himself that she couldn’t make him feel sorry for her. She had no power over him.

When she opened the door, she wasn’t as composed as she usually was. She was rushing around the clean, white kitchen and starts talking about multiple things at once: a new dress she wanted to buy, tried it on, couldn’t decide, put it on hold, got shoes instead, a call from her uncle who lives in Italy, her boss wants her to fly to London for the weekend, her friend Emma wanted to go on a trip to the Caribbean but Jessica wanted to go France.

“Listen,” she finally stops babbling on. “I had such a good idea. Let’s go get a curry. I’m craving one and don’t feel like cooking. What’s that place you took me to that one time? The Maha something?”

“You mean that fleabag?” he says.

“Excuse me?” She quickly turns to regard him.

Drake didn’t remember the name of the restaurant she was talking about — the name changed every few years as it came under different owners, but the menu always stayed the same. His mother had brought him and his sister there when they were younger. A while ago he had dinner there with Jessica, who commented that the venue and waiters depressed her.

“The saddest restaurant in the capital,” Drake repeats her comment. “Great idea.”

She frowns. “Whatever. I think there’s another place that’s closer. Emma knows where it is, I can ask her for the name. Or we can do what you want.”

“What I want?” Drake leans against the door frame of the kitchen, his hands in his pockets. “That’s rich.”

“Sorry.” She turns away. “I thought a curry might be nice. Forget I said anything.”

“It’s fine. You can stop now.”

She turns to him again, a vacant smile on her face. “Excuse me?”

“You know what I’m talking about.”

Jessica blinks at him, but says nothing.

“I think you should keep your phone on when you’re with him. I tried to call you on the street. Maybe if you had answered, we wouldn’t be here.”

“Sorry, I don’t know...?” She trails off. Drake doesn’t know if the confusion on her face is genuine or fake.

“Jess, I saw you.”

Again she blinks rapidly. After a slight pause she continues. “Oh, please, you can’t be serious. You don’t mean Boris, do you?” A moment of deadly silence passes. Neither of them says anything, but she speaks up again. “He’s an old friend, from way back, we’re really close—”

“Yeah, I reckon you are.”

“—from when his mother died. He moved to Cordonia for like a year when he was eight. We went to school together. Papa knew him, they did business together for some time. Emma knows him, too, and, and,” she stutters for a moment. “I know how it may have seemed, and I know you have a good reason not to like him, because, because I know about him knowing Riley for all those years and helping Theodore, and, sure they probably shouldn’t have done that, it... it was none of their business but listen, he feels awful about how it turned out—”

“Feels awful?”

“—and he’s been feeling terrible lately,” she continues rapidly, “ever since Theodore died and what happened to Riley and the kids—”

“You two sit around and talk about that shit? You talk about my friends and pity us?”

“—and Boris, he came over to see Emma and I right before we got into the movies. We dropped her off at her apartment after. He... he had a bad upset and just wanted someone to talk to—”

“You don’t expect me to believe all that do you?”

“Listen. I don’t know what... what you know or how you know but—”

“How long have you been seeing him?” He was tired of the nonsense.

“Drake, let’s not do this.”

“No, tell me, I want to know how long.”

“I won’t see him anymore,” she states quickly.

“So you admit it?”

“I didn’t think it mattered until we were married.”

“Didn’t think it mattered?” He’s shocked at her words. Drake doesn’t know what to say to her, but anger still boiled inside him. “You didn’t think I would find out?”

“I said I won’t see him anymore. I told him I wouldn’t a while back.”

“But he keeps coming back,” Drake speculates. “He won’t take no for an answer. He loves you too much.”

“That’s right.”

Drake takes a reflexive step back.

A flash of guilt crosses her face, but it disappears in a second. “Listen. I don’t expect you to understand but it’s rough being in love with the wrong person.”

Silence spreads between them again. They don’t look at each other and instead glance around the room.

Drake had walked into her apartment telling himself that she had no power over him, there was no way for her to make him feel sorry... but who knew the truth of what he was talking about better than Drake? Maybe he was wrong to connect Jessica’s relationship with him and Boris to Drake’s feelings for Riley, but his mind couldn’t help but wander.

“Drake, let’s not let this spoil things. We’re better people when we’re with each other, aren’t we? And... we’re a good couple. We like each other, we get along.” Drake’s anger rises, but he can’t bring himself to speak. Jessica continues, “Now, let’s both be truthful and kind and happy together and—”

“Stop it,” Drake interrupts her again. He had barely heard what she said over his heart hammering in his chest, but he knew that he was tired. He had used most of his energy last night during his fight with Boris, and he wasn’t going to let Jessica take advantage of his exhaustion.

Drake remembers the ring that she wore the night before. He glances down at her hand to see that it’s still there. He makes eye contact with her again. Her eyes are slightly pink with tears.

His voice is rough when he speaks. He’s angry at her, and he wants her to know it. “You can keep the ring if you want. Or sell it, give it away. I could give less of a shit for what you’ll do to it.”

She looks down at her shaking hand. “I won’t sell it, I know it was your grandmother’s.”

He watches her, wondering if she was going to give it back.

“Drake, please, we’re right for each other. This marriage is the right thing for both of us and we both know it—”

“Jess, you know where I live. You can mail it, drop it off. Whatever you want. Just...” Drake trails off. Jessica moves towards him, but he doesn’t want to deal with her anymore. He turns his back to her and walks out the door.

#trr fanfic #liam x mc #trr drake x oc #cordonia #choices trr #choices trr fanfic

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wren-again · 4 years

Text

In Time

Sam was tired. He was tired of fighting, tired of losing, tired of watching his brother lose. He didn’t even feel the blows anymore, not fully, they were so unpredictable. How do you grieve a death if you’re not sure it’s permanent? Existence was surreal, dreamlike, the line between life and death a skipping rope. Eileen had been back so little time. For Cas dying seemed to be little more than a holiday. Still, Sam was tired. It was less the grief that got to him than the exhaustion, the knowledge of another job at hand, another fight and another fight and another fight. Sam wished there was time to look after his brother, time to be happy, time to be sad. They never had time for anything. They never had those conversations, the oh so necessary emotional unpacking, the thorough examination of trauma. Just a little bit here, a little bit there, then a whole new wave of horror to undo any progress they had made.

There were some conversations that Sam had been trying to have with Dean for decades now, never the time, until he didn’t even know how to begin. How do you ask someone if they’re queer this late in life? Someone so prone to rage, to silent treatments, to reckless behaviour. If he was wrong it could send him into a tailspin, if he was right it could be even worse. He wished he had asked now, wished Dean could say the words.

“I love him too.”

It seemed so simple, to Sam, so clear. Dean had barely had the strength to admit what Cas had said, all choking sobs and abject terror, let alone have his side of the conversation now it could not be heard.

Sam had to drive the impala, now. Dean just slumped in the backseat, Cas’ seat, dejectedly staring at nothing. He’d tried, that first night, caressed the steering wheel in that far too tender way he always did, clutched at it as if it could bring him back, (he shouted that a lot these days, when he thought no one could hear). Then the tears came, the clenching of the jaw, the pursing of the lips, and Sam knew that Dean was not going to drive them home. They opened their doors in unison, Dean with perhaps a little more aggression, and Sam was unsurprised. He was more surprised when Dean shooed Jack out of the back, not even bothering to act like it was for the sake of an upgrade, no excuse before he threw himself down across the leather seats. Jack sent worried glances at the two of them, his own grief so overshadowed by what neither of them acknowledged was happening in the backseat. Dean cried, his head where Cas’ lap would normally be, as close as he could get. He cried hard, while they sat in silence. It was a long journey for all of them. It was a shock when he didn’t drive the next day, or the next, or at any point in the week that followed. After that it became the norm; it was crazy how fast they could adjust to the abnormal, even the unbearable.

Dean didn’t try to hide the sorrow anymore, he probably couldn’t, not about something as big as this. Sam would have been pleased, had it not been so heartbreaking.

Sam had to look after his brother now, make sure he ate, make sure he got dressed in the morning. He didn’t seem to notice the little things anymore, there was always this glazed over look on his face, like he was still hearing Cas’ confession, a loop playing in his head that drowned out everything else.

“I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Dean had always talked in his sleep.

Sam couldn’t bear it. He couldn’t bear always fighting, he couldn’t bear always losing, he couldn’t bear always watching his brother lose. He wasn’t going to anymore. Enough was enough. Dean deserved his win. They all did. Sam was going to get Eileen back, and he was going to get Cas back, and Charlie and Donna and all the rest. Chuck should have known better. You should never piss off a Winchester, and Sam was well and truly pissed.

******************

Chuck died as he lived, alone, and fundamentally unimportant.

Sam didn’t care to watch it happen.

When it was over Jack got into the backseat, and Sam sat down beside him, and they didn’t watch through the window as Dean reunited with his angel.

They didn’t watch the pause, the breath that seemed to stretch across eternity, like a ripple in time. They didn’t watch the way Dean swallowed down a noise, or Cas smiled, the unsure way their gazes met. They didn’t see the question, the words in the silence. They didn’t see a surging forward, an embrace, a locking of lips so desperate that they might never unlock again. They didn’t see a series of touches, a checking of reality, of physical being beneath Dean’s hands. They didn’t see Dean break away, gasping in a breath so close Cas must have felt it, even as he said the words. They didn’t see the tentative smile on his lips as he breathed those words over and over and over, as if they would be heard before they had been spoken, as if he could send them back and pull Cas away from the dark, before he had even gone. They didn’t see another kiss, a slower kiss, surer, softened with the knowing, with having said.

They didn’t see the tears on both of their faces when they came over to the car. They didn’t see it when their hands joined between them, in the front seat, while Dean once again took the wheel of his impala.

“Glad to have you back man,” Sam leaned forward and clapped Cas on the shoulder, squeezing for a moment, before letting them go.

“Glad to be back,” Cas smiled and Sam settled into his seat.

They didn’t see the warmth in Cas’ eyes, the way he kept glancing at Dean as he put the car in gear, they didn’t see Dean’s grin or the way his thumb brushed the back or Cas’ hand the entire journey.

They saw nothing but a family, a car, and the open road.

Jack fell asleep on Sam’s shoulder, Sam didn’t follow. He realised, with a start that almost woke the sleeping nephilim, that he was no longer tired.

#Destiel #fan fiction #canon compliant #so far #Angst with a happy ending #spn spoilers #season 15 spoilers #sam pov #My writing

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thelittleredheadedmusician · 3 years

Text

First Lines

So @klaineharmony @wordshakerofgallifrey and @radioactivepigeons all tagged me to do this so uh here it is. This is NOT including academic stuff. But it IS including original work.

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line. Then tag some lovely people!

Hitch Hiker - my book:

It’s raining, hard enough to hit the windshield in fat drops though he can still clearly see the wet road ahead. Oliver isn’t speeding, in high school he would’ve flown around the curves out of town. But now? Coming home and in bad weather? He manages to stay just below the speed limit. And a good thing too.

I don’t want to linger any longer - DCU, Batman, Green Arrow:

Alfred was leery of the summer camp. Bruce went to public school partially because of Martha's pointed remarks regarding democracy and public education, partly because of her pointed remarks regarding Thomas's own time at boarding schools and prep schools surrounded by equally rich and entitled boys. Alfred never said anything at the time, it wasn't his place, and would never say anything now but, he whole heartedly believed both. Especially after his own childhood in private schools, even if the times and the British and American systems were very different. Regardless, Bruce was remaining in public school with all the trials it entailed. Including the socializing problem.

untitled post final chapter short for Hitch Hiker:

“I’m so glad I get to be here for this,” Eve practically flung herself onto the couch, bouncing slightly before settling. She’d just gotten dropped off after rehearsal and was miraculously still teeming with energy.

Give Me the Stars - an original short story:

Morgan leaned closer to the mirror, shifting her hair so she could examine the new growth near her scalp. It was a dark, almost dull brown and the scalp itself didn’t seem red or irritated. She half combed her fingers through it while she shook her hand loose of the strands. Where the few centimeters of brown ended, a shifting cascade of colors began. A swirl or wave or reflection of green and blue and purple with notes of black and pink and sometimes silver. Like an oil slick made tangible. Except, after two months it’d lost its glimmer, its shine. Which didn’t really matter since Morgan spent about seventy percent of the time tucking it up under one hat or another.

glitter and gold - DCU:

She hadn’t been expecting the second explosion. None of them had been expecting the second explosion. Luckily, they were all clear of the debris but Steph’s ears were ringing. A gut feeling said her comm had been knocked out but it’s not like she’d be able to tell right now anyway. She swayed, unsteady. But Batgirl had to worry about the people around her, not herself. A cursory glance looked as though the block’s residents had gotten back far enough before the blast hit. Leaving them covered in dust but unharmed.

five phones on the table - DCU, Titans:

The long table with its numerous chairs was, by proximity to the kitchen, a dining table but due to the nature of the building it occupied doubled as a meeting and strategy table. The small net, paddles, and light plastic balls stored in an innocuous box in the kitchen meant it tripled as a ping pong table.

Adulting Fail - DCU, Titans, Nightwing:

“RICHARD JOHN GRAYSON,” Donna says and for an instant he wonders how a woman who has never met his mother can sound exactly like her. But then again, Donna has always been and will always be his older sister, never mind the fact neither are sure if it’s by three months or three thousand years.

Seventh Floor Walkup - DCU, Titans, Nightwing:

Dick may slightly regret asking his friends to help him move. See, he didn’t have the funds for real movers but had promised pizza if they helped. Except Roy and Garth could each eat a whole pizza, Donna could eat two, and Wally half a baker’s dozen. Which left Dick carrying eleven boxes of pizza to his seventh-floor walkup.

Et tu Brute - DCU, Flash, Batman:

“What the-?” Barry shifted his momentum with ease, turning from where he’d been running towards the Batcomputer and Bruce waiting there for him to instead run towards the metallic object low to the ground and glowing a dull green he’d spotted out of the corner of his eye.

you were shunned and burned your cradle - Newsies:

Being a changeling in New York City hurts. It makes his skin itch and his lungs burn and his eyes water. From the iron that surrounds him, fills the very air along with the smoke. If he’s not careful when he reaches out or brushes against something his skin comes away with a sharp, searing scar.

The Devil Wears What? - DCU, Hellblazer, Zatanna:

“What is this?” John slurred, arm flopping towards the television screen.

The Hattrick - DCU, Green Arrow, Hellblazer:

There is a strong possibility that Mia is in hell. It’d be vaguely poetic and certainly fitting if her personal hell were an empty warehouse. The fact John Constantine is here definitely sells the idea.

Inhouse House Party - Les Miserables:

“I thought we agreed that we weren’t doing Halloween this year?” Enjolras half grumbled, half called up the steps. “In light of the fact that there is a global pandemic and we’ve been responsibly quarantining and social distancing this whole time.” Despite his complaints, he still fixed the ridiculous headband he wore as part of his costume. The halved wiffle ball glued onto it made pretty decent looking fly eyes, but the weight was weird and the whole thing kept slipping as a result.

Second Time is Coincidence - DCU, Green Arrow, Hellblazer:

“Oh c’mon,” Mia groaned, slumping against the bonds that currently had her suspended from the warehouse ceiling. “Not you again!”

Three Musketeers - DCU, Batfam:

Bristol was technically in Gotham City limits. Though the gilted mansions and private woods with pastures and stables seemed like a whole other world in comparison. The residents liked to think so too, especially because – despite Gotham’s robust public transportation system – it was almost impossible to reach the rich suburb from the city proper. It was because they lived in this separate world that Bristol’s wealthy residents often fought to receive special treatment or even secede from the city all together.

Deal? Deal. - DCU, Hellblazer, Zatanna:

“No,” John whined, drawing it out into about six syllables. He stretched his arm out, nearly falling off the couch in the process, but Zatanna just pushed the half-empty glass of whiskey further away from the edge of the coffee table and out of his reach.

Pumpkin Guts - Les Miserables:

There had been strange noises coming from the kitchen all afternoon. Combeferre was staunchly ignoring them because he’s trying to finish reading this journal article before anyone else came home. Having Courfeyrac in the vague direction of behind him and doing who knew what all is more than enough of a distraction. Besides, Ferre can fairly well ignore the sounds coupled with Courf’s slightly off-key humming of Nightmare Before Christmas.

Sunrise Shadows - DCU, Batgirl, Starman:

It was late, or early depending on your perspective, and Steph was that bone deep tired that came after a fight to save the fate of the world. Which was fine, they’d won, but she didn’t really know where in the world she was and Steph really just wanted to crawl into bed. Maybe take her suit off first. Possibly slap some Neosporin on her cuts and scrapes. But mostly sleep.

The Good Stuff - Newsies:

Kath pulled her favorite armchair into the doorway of her apartment. The antique wingback her friends had helped her liberate from a thrift store in Queens and then clean and reupholster. It was, undeniably, too heavy to be shoved across the hardwood like that but Kath wanted to be comfy. And there were the little felt things on the legs to protect her floor.

Salt and Iron - DCU, Batgirl:

Steph pried her bedroom window open before slipping in and closing it firmly behind herself. Then locked it for good measure. Sure, she’d seen some weirdness since first putting on a mask, and just a few months into her time as Batgirl she’d even fought off some Segway riding vampires with Kara. But this was different. For one, they weren’t real vampires but Dracula from an old film brought to life. For another, it looked like literal hell had overtaken Gotham.

Well, I either have really long opening lines or my understanding of what constitutes opening “lines” is skewed. Also my formatting didn’t always past so poo on tumblr for that. Hmm, this is mostly Halloween fics but also fairly indicative of what I write which is nice. I like that I start with dialogue so often, it’s weirdly fitting for me as a person. The cold open musing on Gotham’s social, political, economic structure at Three Musketeers isn’t my favorite but I am obsessed with it. I think Second Time is Coincidence is my favorite because Mia’s response to John is the only response anyone should ever have to John Constantine.

All of my friends have already been tagged~

#long post #writing #own writing #my fic #original writing

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440mxs-wife · 4 years

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Just Friends (Part 2)

Bags packed, you took one last look around your room to make sure you didn't forget anything. You took the two envelopes you marked "Sam" and "Dean" and left them for their recipients. Before closing and locking your bedroom door, you left your phone on the dresser. You weren't taking it with you so that they couldn't track you and bring you back.

Your first stop was in Hibbing, Minnesota to visit Sheriff Donna Hanscum. You two had become good friends, working together on some cases with the boys. You loved her quirky sense of humor, something you were in desperate need of lately. She didn't know the reason behind your visit to her without Sam and Dean. Nonetheless, she was happy that you were coming to see her.

Donna had told you about this little dive restaurant on the edge of town that served the best burgers, so you decided to meet there. When you pulled up to the place, you saw her get out of her sheriff's vehicle and run over to you for a hug. You were so happy to see her, that tears sprang to your eyes. She saw this, and gave you an extra squeeze. "Come on, girl, let's get you one of the best burgers in the Midwest," she said.

While you waited for your order, she looked you straight in the eye and told you to spill about why you were there to visit without the boys. At first, you tried to put her off, told her that you were taking a break from hunting. She gave you that look like she knew there was more than what you were saying and wasn't taking 'no' for an answer. That caused you to spill everything, from Dean's criticism of your pie, to the hunting classes. To growing closer to Dean and your feelings about him. To that night in the bar and your limited contact with both Winchesters since that night. When you finished, she reached for your hand.

"You've certainly been through a lot, honey. I'm wondering, though, if you should maybe give Dean a chance to explain," she remarked.

"There's nothing to explain, Donna. He made his feelings quite clear that night with that bimbo. I know because I heard him say, clear as day, 'she's not my girlfriend, it's not like that between us'. Can't get much clearer than that," you replied as your voice broke on the last word.

"Just because that's what he said, doesn't mean that's what he meant. Men, especially that one, are notorious for hiding their feelings behind a 'macho' façade. I'm just saying that you may want to give him a second chance. He may surprise you," Donna finished just as her phone rang. She glanced at the caller ID and excused herself to take the phone call.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Back at the bunker, Dean pulled Baby into her parking spot with a screech of the tires. The engine was barely off before he yanked the keys from the ignition and threw open the car door. He went rushing down the spiral staircase, calling your name. His voice grew increasingly concerned with each call and hearing no answer from you.

Dean walked towards your room, only to find the door closed and locked. Hoping you might still be inside but just asleep, he went to his own room to deposit his bag. He turned on his light and the first thing he saw was an envelope propped up on his pillow. He raced over to it, tore it open and sat down on his bed.

Dear Dean,

By the time you read this, I will be gone. I don't know where I'm going yet, but I know that I can't stay in the bunker anymore with you and Sam.

Some things have happened in the past few weeks that made me realize that I can never have what I truly want. Rather than tiptoe around about it any longer, I decided that it was best for me to leave. You won't have me around anymore as a distraction or someone else to be responsible for.

I'm sure you may be asking yourself what it is that I truly want, so here it is. Dean Winchester--I am in love with you. I have never been more sure of anything in my life. I only wish that you felt the same.

I wish for so many things. I wish I had the courage to tell you this in person, to tell you about how wonderful I know you are. You may choose to show the world how tough and bad-ass you are, but I see beyond that. You are kind, thoughtful, considerate, tender, have a wonderful sense of humor and such a large capacity for love. I only wish you could see yourself the same way I see you. You will always have my heart, Dean Winchester. I only wish I had yours.

Until we meet again,

Love

As Dean read the last two lines, he felt the tears streaming down his face. At that moment, he realized that he wasn't willing to let you go without a fight. He re-folded the letter and put it back in the envelope. He called your cell phone, only to hear it ringing in your room. He picked the lock on the door and threw it open. When he turned on the light, his heart sank as he saw you had packed up everything. It was as if you'd never been there.

Dean sat on the edge of your bed and started crying again. He didn't hear Sam when he came to the door, a letter in his hand as well. Sam's eyes were red and puffy as though he'd also been crying. "You got a letter too?" Dean remarked.

"She left us, Dean. Why did she leave?" Sam asked.

"Because I'm a coward, Sam. I couldn't admit to myself how I felt about her, and she couldn't take being around me, knowing I didn't return her love. But I do, and I'm not giving her up without a fight," Dean declared.

"How are you going to find her? She left her phone here, so you can't track her that way," Sam observed.

Dean's face lit up. "I think I know where she might be," he said as he pulled out his phone and dialed a number.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Donna glanced at the Caller ID, gave you a quick smile and excused herself to answer the call. You nodded and she walked back to her car. "Dean? What's going on?" Donna asked.

"Is she with you? Please tell me she's safe and that she's with you," Dean pleaded.

"Yah, she's here, we're getting ready to have a burger at that place on the edge of town," she confirmed.

Dean breathed a sigh of relief. "Good, keep her there, Sam and I are on our way," Dean replied.

"I don't know if I can do that without causing suspicion, which may cause her to take off again. Let me think a minute. Wait! I know. Meet me at Jody's and we can regroup there. I'll explain everything to Jody, and tell your girl that we should have a 'girls weekend' at Jody's. I'm off work for the next few days, so that should work," Donna finished.

"Sounds good, we'll meet you there, but we'll give you a few hours' head start. I don't want her to see the Impala and drive right past," Dean said.

"Good idea. See you soon. And Dean? This is your second chance, so don't screw it up. She's a great girl, and she deserves the best. If that's you, great, but if you don't feel the same, you should let her go," Donna pleaded.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to screw this up. I do feel the same, I'm just a little late in realizing it, that's all," he grinned. "See you at Jody's."

Donna hung up from Dean and placed another call. "Hey, Jody?"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

You watched Donna during her phone call and wondered who was on the other end. Couldn't have been Dean, he most likely didn't know you were gone yet.

Whoever Donna was talking to, though, you noticed that the conversation grew a bit animated. She bounced up and down a little in happiness, then came rushing back over and told you the good news.

She said that Jody had suggested a girls weekend, after what she learned of your situation with Dean. You had to admit, that time spent with Jody and her daughters held a certain appeal, and might be just what you need. After you and Donna finished lunch, you hopped into your car and headed for Sioux Falls.

A few hours later, you were pulling up to Jody's house. As soon as you parked your car in the driveway, Claire, Jody and Alex came out to greet you with a hug. You all held on to each other for a bit, then headed into the house. You explained what was going on with you, about why you left the bunker.

"On the way over here, I had time to think about what you said, Donna, and I think you're right. I should probably go home. I'll just have to accept that Dean and I are friends, and that it may be all the farther it'll ever go. Besides, what's important is saving people and hunting things, not falling in love," you explained.

Claire snorted and Jody shot her a dirty look. "I'm glad you've decided to go back, not that we don't love having you here. But for now, let's make some popcorn, order some pizzas and pop in a movie!" Jody exclaimed.

"Sounds awesome to me!" you laughed.

About halfway through the movie, the doorbell rang, signaling that the pizza had arrived. "I'll get the door!" you said as you jumped up from the couch. "You can keep the movie running, I've already seen it."

"Why didn't you say something when we were picking out what to watch?" Donna asked.

"Because it's still one of my favorites!" you explained over your shoulder, opening the front door. "Hi there, how much do we--" you said, the last words dying on your lips. "Dean," you whispered.

“Hiya sweetheart,” he softly greeted you.

"For heaven's sake, get in here with that pizza before it gets cold," Jody muttered. You stepped aside to allow Sam and Dean to come into the house, avoiding Dean's eyes at all costs.

Dean took the pizza into the kitchen and you opened the cabinet to get down plates for everyone. "Talk to him," Donna said softly. You gently shook your head. "Not yet," you murmured.

After you closed the cabinet door, you were startled to see Dean on the other side, causing you to gasp in surprise. You put your hand on your chest to slow down your hammering heart. It wasn't because you were frightened at all, but it was due to Dean's proximity to you.

"Hey," he said. "Can I please talk to you? In private?" he asked.

You nodded and walked ahead of Dean out to the back porch area. Once out there, you looked up at the trees, the moon, the stars, anywhere but in his direction.

You stopped out by the railing and wrapped your arms around your midsection. You shivered a bit from the cold and the anticipation of being alone with Dean. He shrugged off his jacket and put it around your shoulders. "Here you go," he said softly.

"Thank you, but won't you be cold?" you asked, finally turning to look at him.

"Nah, I'll be fine. So, I read your letter, and I think there are some things you got wrong in there," he started.

"Really? Like what?" you asked in surprise.

"I don't think of you as a distraction, or someone to be responsible for. You're very important to me, and I value your friendship. I've been missing it these past few weeks," Dean explained.

"I know, Dean, and I'm sorry for doing that to you and Sam," you replied, tears threatening.

He tilted your chin up to look into your eyes. "There's something else you were wrong about, too. You can have what you truly want. I am in love with you too, but I was just too stubborn to see it. You said in your letter that I will always have your heart. I hope you will accept my heart in return?" he asked hopefully.

You slid your hands up his chest to cup his cheeks. You gently tugged him towards you until your lips met in a soft, sweet kiss. "Yes," you whispered.

That was all he needed, because his lips were back on yours in an instant. His mouth was moving almost frantically against yours, trying to take all of you in at once. His hands slipped inside of his jacket to pull you closer, until you were flush against his body. "I love you, sweetheart," Dean said softly as he peppered your neck with kisses.

"I love you, too, Dean. Thank you for making my wishes come true," you said as you gazed into those emerald orbs of his. "Anytime, my love," he murmured, taking you into his arms.

#dean winchester #deanxreader #dean winchester x reader #spn fanfiction #spn fluff #spn imagine #supernatural

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magsmarklin · 4 years

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This could be heaven for everyone - a Supernatural finale fic

Sam took one long, last look at the body on the pyre, wrapped in white fabric, before he ignited his lighter. They had always known it would end like this, dying on the job, but it still hurt. He had still hoped they would get out. Of course amazing, stubborn Dean had not gone for anything less than a fist fight with God himself, which somehow seemed appropriate. Sam felt a laugh rise through his throat but it sounded more like a sob. When Sam had thought about the possibility of dying on a hunt he had always imagined himself dying with Dean, not to be left behind. If there was one thing Sam had always counted on in this world it was his brothers’ presence and protection, and now he was all alone.

A hand sneaked its way into his.

Okay then, not entirely alone.

He smiled sadly at Eileen and squeezed her hand reassuringly. Then he let go of the lighter and watched the flames rise.

When they could no longer see the wrapped body he let Eileen lead him back to the crowd that had gathered. Donna and Garth each gave him a hug. Jody contented herself with a knowing look and squeezing his shoulder. So many people came up to shake his hand and offer their condolences. Apocalypse world refugees, hunters that he and Dean had worked cases with, some people they had saved and hunters Sam didn’t even know. There was even a brief visit from a demon, sent by Rowena to represent her and pay her respects. All had come for the last chance to honour the legendary Dean Winchester.

Dean opened his eyes and found himself standing on a small road surrounded by trees. So he had made it to heaven. Tears stung his eyes as relief surged through him. He had always hoped. Hoped that the good deeds, all the good intentions would outweigh all the bad. He had never been sure.

“Well, at least I made it to heaven,” he told himself. Maybe it would feel more real if he said it outloud.

“Yep.” Dean spun around to find Bobby sitting close by, on the porch to Harvelle’s roadhouse? Not apocalypse world Bobby, but his Bobby. Dean was confused as hell.

“What memory is this?” he asked, trying to figure out why his heaven, where you relived the best moments in your life, looked like this.

Bobby chuckled. “It ain’t, ya idjit.”

“Yeah it is.” Dean countered. “Cause the last I heard you… you were in heaven's lock up.” He walked up on the porch, and sat down next to Bobby.

“Was. Now I’m not,” Bobby explained. “That kid of yours, before he went… wherever, made some changes here. Busted my ass out, and then he- well he set some things right. Tore down all the walls up here. Heaven ain’t just reliving your olden goldies anymore. It’s what it always should have been. Everyone happy. Everyone together.” He paused, letting Dean take it in. “Rufus lives about five miles that way, with Aretha.” he waved in a general direction. “Thought she’d have better taste,” he muttered. “And your mum and dad… they got a place over yonder. It ain’t just heaven Dean. It’s the heaven you deserve. And we’ve been waiting for you.” Dean was somewhat in shock, but in a happy way. Heaven seemed to be better than he’d ever hoped. Bobby bustled around beside him, and procured two beers out of a cooler. He handed one to a still pensive Dean.

“So Jack... did all that?”

“Well… Cas helped.” Cas? So he wasn’t alone and suffering in the empty? A weight lifted from Deans shoulders. But why wasn’t he here then?

“It’s a big, new world out there,” Bobby continued. “You’ll see.” Dean nodded. It was a prospect he looked forward to. Mirroring Bobby he lifted the beer to his mouth and took a first sip.

“Oh wow. This tastes like the first drink I ever shared with my dad.” Bobby snorted.

“Quality stuff?”

Dean smiled, a bit nostalgic.

“No, it’s crap. But it was fantastic.”

“Just like this.”

Dean wanted to agree, it seemed pretty amazing. But Bobby had said ‘everyone happy, everyone together’. So where were the two people he cared about most?

“It’s almost perfect,” he settled for.

Bobby looked at him knowingly. “He’ll be along. Time up here… it’s different. You got everything you could ever want, or need or... dream.” He? Did Bobby mean Sam or Cas? Could he not have them both? But everything you could ever dream… he could certainly dream it. He knew that he wanted them. Needed them even. So they would both show up sooner or later?

Bobby smiled at him.

“So I guess the question is… what are you gonna do now, Dean?” Dean looked at the beautiful black car parked in front of the house. She looked like he had just devoted an entire weekend to take care of her. He needed some time to think, to take it all in. He wanted to go see his parents, and all the other friends who should be here, but he had an eternity to do that, right?

“I think I’ll go for a drive,” he said.

“Have fun.”

Dean slid into the driver’s seat, sighing as he settled in.

“Hey Baby”. No matter where he was, or what he was, the front seat of the impala would always feel right. Like home. As he stuck the key in the ignition and turned the radio started playing. Carry on my wayward son by Kansas. “Ah! I love this song,” Dean told the car approvingly.

He drove around aimlessly for a while. The purr of the engine and the feeling of the road against the tires was like meditation. Or, Dean wouldn’t know, he had never tried meditating, but he could guess. When he arrived at a wooden bridge spanning a calm river Dean turned off the engine and got out. Leaning on the rail he took three deep breaths, just listening to the birds and the soft burbling of the river. Yes, heaven was really peaceful.

“Hello, Dean.”

Dean turned and looked at the man standing on the bridge. He had dark hair, eyes as blue as his tie and a slightly dirty trench coat.

“Cas.” Dean closed the distance in three long strides and hugged him. “I have missed you, buddy.” “I have missed you too, Dean.” Dean patted Cas on the shoulder. They didn’t need to say more right now. Both turned back to the rail, shoulder against shoulder, and looked out over the river.

“So you helped Jack with all this?” Dean asked.

“He did such a good job. I think you would be proud.”

“Cas, I am proud.”

They stayed like that in comfortable silence for a while, until they heard a noise behind them. There was Dean's baby brother, looking just like when Dean had seen him last: long hair, stubble on the chin and hands propped into the pockets of his jacket.

“Hiya Sammy.”

“Dean, Cas.” Sam nodded at them and then smiled. “So this is heaven huh?”

#supernatural #SPN #15x20 carry on #Destiel

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daisydaisybilly · 4 years

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Hard to love - part 6

title- hard to love - 1, 2 3 4 5 pairing: fem!reader x Sam word count: 4.2k square filled: for @spnquotebingo - “We are far from perfect, but we are good.” warnings: angst, swearing, some fluff, pre smut and more fluff A/N: last part, sad to finishes this because I've really enjoyed writing it but it had to come to an end. half edited but it’s 4 am and i need sleep so mistakes are there. Want to say thank you to everyone that read this series and hope you stick around for my next. (Working on a dean one or a love triangle one but both need work so i’ll update soon)

MAIN MASTERLIST | REQUEST OPEN | series masterlist

It felt like you were in a mindless runt. You pushed any kind of feeling down, scared that if you felt even the smallest thing then you'd feel everything.

A few hunts back you had met Donna, she was a hunter/sheriff. You had rolled into Stillwater, Minnesota after hearing about a case. She had seen right through your fake FBI get up right away. But instead of arresting you like you thought she would. You two bonded really fast, something about her was easy to trust. You gave her your number for if she ever needed your help.

You still missed Sam everyday but you remembered why you stayed away. You hoped he had moved on, it made it easier to think that.

But the one thing you didn't think would happen, she would know Sam and Dean. Of all the hunters in American you had to befriend one who knew them. When she called you originally you thought it would just be the two of you but as you pulled up at the meeting spot you saw all three talking.

They hadn't seen you yet, you wanted to drive away and call Donna with a bullshit excuse but you had promised to help. You watched for a few seconds, watching Sam mostly. He looked tired but he was still smiling. Donna always had a way to make people feel better even when everything was falling apart.

Donna was the first to notice you watching in your car, when she stopped so did the Winchesters. Both their faces dropped. You looked away, trying to pull yourself together.

You want to keep an emotionless façade, making yourself the villain you felt were. The boys were keeping a similar façade as well, not wanting Donna to know the issues.

Looking straight at Donna, not having the will power to look either Sam or Dean in the eyes. Sam would of obviously told Dean everything. You couldn't help but remember what Dean said when you first came to the bunker.

'He's already wiped. Just don’t mess him around.'

And you did it the end, you let him think you were okay enough to be with someone completely. "Donna" you smiled as she hugged you.

"Y/N, Glad you could make it. This is-" She drew away, turning you to face Sam and Dean. All the air left your lungs but you couldn't show it.

"We've met actually" Dean cut her off, if looks could kill you'd be dead.

"Oh I didn't know" she still smiled not noticing the awkward air around the four of you. "so I bet you're wondering why I call you all here"

"Something like that" Dean muttered. Sam had yet to say anything but you could feel his eyes on you.

"Well, I called you guys for the muscle and Y/N here for brains" she slapped Dean on his back.

"glad that's what I'm known for" you weakly smiled.

Dean muttered something under his breath but you didn’t caught it in time.

"So what do you know so far?" You said Donna, you could feel your façade dropping.

"well it all started a few weeks back, a local man was killed we had no leads until a women came in claiming she knew the man and dreamt how he died, days before he did" Donna explained.

"They could just be a physic" you hoped it was that simple, then you could leave.

"that was my first thought but then we got half a dozen calls about people's nightmares coming true" Donna finished the whole story.

"I'll look into some lore about dreams coming true and the rest of you can question people" You said.

"You sure you're okay alone?" Donna smiled still not picking up the tense.

"of course" you smile a bit to wide , nodding to everyone. "like you said these guys are the muscle and they'll need your help more than me".

Your eyes locked on Sam longer than the others. He just barely met your eyes. "right then, guess we'll caught up later" Donna said with the same cheerily tone.

After another smile you started to walk back to your car. You could do this, just this case then you could hide away. "Y/N". You stopped dead, If anyone was going to shout after you, you thought it would be Donna or even Sam but not Dean.

"Dean" you didn't turn around. "Just so you know I didn't know you guys would be here".

"would you of shown up If you did?" Dean said from behind, his voice was cold.

You swallowed and turned to face him. "No I wouldn't, and the only reason I'm staying is because Donna asked me to help. I'll stay out of your way as much as I can. I don't want to hurt Sam more than I already have".

"So you admit you hurt him" Dean argued.

You looked just over his shoulder, Donna and Sam were watching the two of you. "I know I hurt him, and I hate myself for doing it but this is the easier way".

"breaking his heart is easier?!" it was clear he was angry.

"Yes. Walking away is a lot easier than him dying or me dying. How you ever watched someone you love die?" You felt angry too. Of course Dean had questions.

He didn't say anything but his face said it all.

"This way I am the bad guy, this way Sam can hate me and move on and be- he can be happy" You felt like crying, everything was hitting you all at once. "I'm going to go and research and you can go back to hating me too".

He didn't say anything, only nodded. You looked to Sam again, he was doing the same, looking at you. Keeping the narrative as the villain you were the one to look away.

Somehow the town had a store that sold a wide range of stuff. From supplies of spells to bones. You didn’t know to know what or whose bones they were but it was still interesting .

The section you needed most was at the very back of the store. They had old hardbacks and newer paper backs. You really had no idea what you were looking for, dreams coming true was strange. They sounded more like nightmares if anything.

Something that used nightmares. You swore you heard something about nightmares in polish folklore. In the end you left the store with 5 books, one in polish you could barely read.

The next step was to find a motel to stay until the case was over. You only had to drive for a mile or so before you found one that looked okay.

you sent a quick text to Donna telling her where she'd find you. All you did for the next 3 hours was read and take notes. The wall above the bed was covered in ideas.

You were stood on your bed with a book in each hand and a pen in your mouth. You stopped when the motel door opened. If it was someone trying to attack you, they had chosen the right time.

"Hey, Y/N you find anything" Donna came in carrying some beer with her. "I thought we could have a girls night"

You spat your pen out, still holding the books. "Donna. I didn't think I'd see you again today" you jumped from the bed, putting the books down too.

"Well we finished with the questioning and I wanted to catch up with you. Plus I wanna know what happened with you and the Winchesters" she shut the door behind her. Turns out she had spotted the tense from earlier.

"What about the Winchester?" you tried to play dumb but Donna saw right through it.

"I saw how you couldn't look them in the eyes, and then I saw the way you spoke with Dean" she eyed you seriously handing you a bottle.

"It's very hard to explain" you sighed, "I met them months ago"

"And the rest?" Donna asked holding her own beer.

"Not important. But want is, is this case and I think I might found what we are looking for" you point to the note covered fall. "now I'm getting most of my infor from a polish book and I can't read it all but the other books fill in the gaps".

"okay, I'll bite what we looking at" Donna sighed, knowing she'll get nothing out of you right now.

"Okay so I remembered something about witches and dreams but couldn't remember the whole lore but I found it" you jumped up on the bed pointing at all your work. "They're called Night hags, they're nightmare spirits they feed on nightmares".

"and how do ya kill one of these night hags?" she pointed to all your research on the wall with the hand that held her beer.

"sliver but you need to do it when they're feeding, which is the hard bit" you bite your lips and picked up another book, "I found a summoning spell but we will need someone to act as bait".

"Well then better call the boys" she reached for her phone but you stopped her before she could.

"Do we need too? We can do it, you know girl power and all" you said, feeling nervous about being in the same room as the boys so soon. You thought you had at least tonight. "or we can do it tomorrow night? They're probably at a bar getting drunk anyway".

"I'll only agree if you tell me what's going on with you and the boys"

"Promise?" you bite the inside of your cheek, already feeling worried.

"You bet ya" she sat down on the bed, waiting for you to join her.

You sighed a sat down next her, getting your own beer. "like I said I met them a mouths ago, I saved them from some witch" you smiled at the memory. "Then I did a case alone with Sam and we bonded , like I really bonded. Then we kept in contact but I didn't see him for a while and when we finally did see each other again. I broke his heart because I can’t let myself love him, even though I do" you felt your throat croak with a sob when you finished.

Donna just hugged you, "I didn't think it was something so big".

"I hate myself for what I did to him" you muttered, "I hope he hates me, it would make everything easy".

"maybe it's not too late. Maybe he still feels the same" she rubbed your back.

"but it scares me, what I feel for him and what he feels for me" your sobbed a little more. "All I want is for him to be happy".

-x-

After a while Donna left, you were too upset to talk anymore. You had just gotten dressed after a shower. The only light came from the streetlight outside. The bed had been cleared for all your things, everything was still and quite.

You sat down on the chairs by the window, putting your head in your hands. Now you were alone you could take in the whole day, seeing Sam, your chat with Dean and all the feeling bubbling up again.

Someone walked past your window casing a shadow across the floor, you watched as the shadow stopped outside your room. Reaching for you gun you waited to see what would happen. You took a few steps towards the door, reaching for the door handle. You sung the door open and opened your mouth in shock when you saw who was standing there.

He was swaying a little, like he couldn't stand up for you. His long hair was a little messy from the wind and being messed with. "Sam" his name left your lips, you felt the pain of it.

He pushed his head up so he could stand taller, "Donna mentioned you were staying here and I want to talk" His words were wobbly. You could smell beer and whiskey coming off him.

"You're drunk. Tell me where you're staying and I'll drive you back" you went to hold his arm but he pushed it away.

"NO" you stepped back, taken back from his raised tone. "I'm not leaving until you speak with me".

You felt hopeless, "Come in before someone calls the cops" you open the door wider for him. "I'll call Dean"

"he's asleep" Sam muttered walking into the room. Throwing his jacket off and onto a chair.

"Fine. I'll get another room and you can stay here" you sighed and went to grab a few things.

Sam breathed heavy and turned to watch you. "just stay here", the lifted his hands up and sat on the bed. "We've shared a bed before".

"this time is different" you said, putting some steel in your voice.

"your choice" he muttered under his breath.

You pushed back your hair, "the right choice".

Sam stood up, catching himself a little and walked closer to you. "don't I get a choice!". You couldn't answer all your fight had been taken over by your guilt and pain. Maybe you had only been thinking about yourself and how you weren't strong enough. "you left before I could say I love you"

You face was wet with tears, that was the last thing you ever thought he'd say. You opened and closed your mouth to speak. He was waiting for you to speak but all you could do was stare. He raised his hand and held your face, a sob sounded from the back of your throat when you lent closer to him.

You felt more tears fall, you brought your hand to his. You had missed his touch more than anything, all the warmth from his hand was traveling through your whole body. Your lips parted when his thumb ran along them. "Sam. We can't".

He didn't move away or change his face. You couldn't bear to look any longer so you closed your eyes. You felt his free arm go round you. Your breath quicken when he lend you to walk on.

You opened your eyes and looked into his hazel ones. They were half closed with exhaustion. "we can sleep, just grant me that". You wanted to fight but you were to exhausted yourself. It went like clockwork, you both settled down in bed, he wrapped his arms around you. He buried his head into the nook of your neck. And that's how you slept, safe in his arms.

-x-

Sunlight warming your skin woke you up, you could feel Sam's sallow breath on your neck. It was a slip to let Sam in, even more of a sip that you feel asleep in his arms but despised the regret you would feel late you finally felt whole.

You turned so you could face him, his hair had fallen across his face, his eyelashes casting shadows over his cheeks. You still had a whole case to get through when you both woke up. But being in his arms again was all you had wanted since you left but like always you knew this wouldn't end well. God Sam would wake up thinking all was good but you were still so unsure if you'd make it out alive, Sam was right though he deserved a choice about how this ended.

His eyes were beginning to open, you bit your lip as his sleepy hazel eyes focused on you. You wondered what he remembered from last night he was just drunk enough to speak with you but maybe he'd forgotten just how he'd gotten to your room.

"hi" you whispered, he smiled immediately when he saw you were still next to him, still in his arms.

"Hi" he voice was half wonder and shock. He brought his hand the back of your neck. "So…mmm what does this mean?"

You didn't know what to say because you were thinking the same thing, "honestly? I don't know, but you were right last night. I never gave you a choice, I just ran and it was wrong so maybe if-" you breathed heavy through your nose as he waited for you to finish, he already looked so hopefully. "If we take things slow then maybe and it’s a big maybe I can let go of my fear for losing you".

He first answered by pulling you into a tight hug, you paused in a moment of shock but then put your arms around him. You could feel him grinning against your shoulder. He pulled away to speak. "I don't want to push you in to this".

"No, I need the push" you smile, running your fingers thought his hair, pushing it away. "I love you and I don't want to push you away, I need the time away and this half finished case to show me".

"Yeah, I was gonna ask about all the creepy stuff on the wall" he looked up to the wall above the bed and shrived. "Why have it above the bed?"

"because then I don't have to stare at it when I'm in bed" you laughed, you pulled him closer. "Kiss me?", he didn't need to be asked twice. You both smiled against each others lips, kissing Sam was hardly ever hard but this time felt like you were catching up on all the time you missed.

He pulled away as his hands lifted your top from your head, you hadn't put a bra on the night before so you were left with nothing but your shorts. His hands went right to your breast and cupped them. He played with each nipple, you gasped into his lips. He then moved down as took one nipple in his mouth and sucked. Your back buckled and you pressed more against him, when his tongue circled the tip.

You bit your lip to hold in a moan, you throat aching with the affect. He let your nipple fall from his mouth with a pop and went back to your lips. You tugged at his shirt wanting to feel his skin against your own. He answered you wish by taking it off. You let your lips fall to his neck and kiss along his neck and down this chest. His hands were moving all over your body as you kissed all the skin you could get to.

you stopped abruptly when you heard someone try and open your door. You looked from each other to the door, which was still trying to be opened. "Sam! Open up" .

You swore and pulled your top back on and pointed for Sam to get his own on. It was useless to try and lie to Dean but here you were, pretending you were 5 minutes away from sex.

"Dean" You sung the door open and eyed him. He looked from you to Sam who was still in bed waving over to his brother.

"Caught you two at a bad time then" he laughed and walked in with out being asked. "donna said you had a plan".

You watch shut the door and sat near the window, you then explained everything to them. Dean seemed happy with the plan but Sam looked a little worried. " You're okay with being the bait?"

You shrugged, "Gets the job done, plus you guys and Donna have my back". You took out your phone to text Donna to come. "You two can go and get the stuff I need, while I get dressed".

"sure I speak for Sammy too when I say you don't have too" he winked, purely joking but Sam's cheeks still went red.

"very funning. Now get lose and do your bit"

-x-

You were pasting around the hotel room, picking up everything you'd need for the summoning spell, you knew that Dean, Sam and Donna were all outside waiting but you were still worried something could go wrong.

The spell was easy, only needed some dream rot, lamb's blood, bones and some of your own blood. Carefully you mixed everything together. Reading from one of the books you waited for the hag to show up.

The motel room was set up to look like you were trained enough for this hunt or any hunt. You made sure to hide your actual weapon and had just your gun to hand.

All you needed to do now was wait, ever since the Djinn had gotten hold of you, you had been scared hunting something you didn't know and this was the first night hag any of you had hunted. You were hoping it would be weaker during the day.

Nothing was happening until everything did. First the lights started to flicker, then the room went ice cold. You stood up and looked around the room for any movement. When you got to the far left corner you saw a fog beginning to form into a space. Your nerves took over and you shot at it. It moved faster than you thought, throwing itself at you.

You screamed when you hit the floor, head hitting a set of draws. Everything went out of focus, a face of an old lady was the first thing to become clear, before you could scream again she put her hand over your mouth.

The room went dark, when the lights in your mind came back on again you were in the same nightmare you always had but this time was different. Instead of Danny being there dead, it was Sam. This is what night hags did, they feed off your nightmares and here you were playing into its plan.

It took everything to pull out of the dream, there was the hag again now sat on your chest. Thankfully the gun was still in your grip, so you fired, praying the others would come.

You breathing went slack as she hit you with more power this time, now you were in the bunker. The lights red, your feet moved without being told . You stopped in a hallway it looked the same as the others did but this one had Sam's lifeless body on the floor. A sob overpowered you and knocked you down to your knees. You fell close enough at the blood that pooled around him wet you knees and hands.

You brought your hands to your face, even in the red lighting of the diner his blood was clear. It was just a dream, this is real. You repeated like a pray. The real Sam will save you soon, then everything will be okay.

The lights suddenly came back on, the blood was even more frightening. God you hoped this meant it was over, It had to end soon.

"Y/N! Wake up" a voice echoed through the empty halls. You could hear more background noise too, more voices. You suddenly tired , everything was melting away.

When you next opened your eyes Sam was staring down at you, you were once again in his arms. You let your head fall back with relief. "Oh thank God".

Sam smiled, "Did you doubt us?".

"No" you smiled, catching your breath. You looked around the room and saw Dean and Donna lent against one wall and a dead hag on the floor. "plan worked then".

"for the most part" Sam chuckled, "Apart from this" he pulled a strand of grey hair from your head. "Seems we were fast enough".

You felt the hair, you had read about people aging fast if the magic was strong enough but just a strand was weird. "I think I can pull it off". He only laughed and helped you stand, "You guys on clean up?"

"Like you said once, 'I did the kill so you do the clean up'" dean clapped his hands together.

You pouted your lips, "But I did the research and have grey hair now! At my age too". No one seemed to buy it. You rolled eye your eyes." fine. Can someone at least help me get her in my boot".

-x-

You stood alone with Sam just outside Stillwater. After everything was done, you and Sam left to have sometime alone. The both of you were lining against your car. The moment was so peaceful it felt wrong to ruin it with words. But what you needed to say felt right.

"You always save me" You kept your voice low, as to keep the moment small. "Like with Djinn you were in that crazy dream and remembering you made me realize that none of it was real". He reached for your hand and rubbed it in between his. "Then with the hag. My fear was you dead, my new worst fear. I used to think it was a weakness but I was wrong".

He waited before speaking. "What am I then?", he sounded so afraid of what you might say.

"we are only a weakness if I let it be one and I don't anymore. I want to be with you, I want the messy, I want the hard because easy never last" you face him and smiled. "We are far from perfect, but we are good".

"yeah. We are good" he smiled too and pulled you into his arms, you knew then that even with all the fear that this was where you belonged, in the arms of the man you love.

#spnquotebingo #snp #snp fic #snp imagine #spn imagine #fanfic #sam x yn #sam winchester x y/n #sam winchester imagine #sam winchester

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xxfanfiction-emo-trinityxx · 4 years

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Still Close - Gerard Way x Reader

Requested Summary: You’re back in the town you grew up in, to visit your childhood friend Gerard Word count: 1 262

Nervously you ran your fingers through your hair before you pressed the doorbell. It was weird, being back in the town you had grown up in. But what was even weirder, was standing in front of the house of your best friend from childhood.

You and Gerard had grown up as neighbours, almost spent every free minute together. Sometimes one of your mothers had taken both of you to the playground, and when you were older, you had spent hours and hours sitting together on the sofa, reading comics. Sometimes you had had sleepovers in each other’s basement, watching movies. And when you had gotten into high school, you had always stuck together, making sure neither of you fell victim to the bullies.

You remembered the awkward moment when Gerard had asked you to go to prom with you. Of course you had said yes, having developed a crush on your cute friend. And maybe you would have gone on more dates, maybe you would have kissed, and Gerard would have been your first boyfriend, but you had moved away. Your father had told you several weeks before the prom, making the prom the last evening you got to spent with Gerard. To say you were heartbroken and sad did not justice to how you were feeling. For a while it felt like you were fighting the entire world, the company your father worked for, who had offered him a better job halfway across the country. But in the end, there was nothing you could do, and you had moved.

Now, several years later, after you had finished college, you were finally back, visiting your hometown. You had called Gerard’s parents a couple of days ago, asking for his address, and they told you that he still lived with them, and that he would probably be home all weekend. So you decided to pay him a visit.

After you had rung the doorbell, a couple of seconds passed before you heard steps approaching the door. A moment later it flung open, and a young man stood in the door frame. Dark dread locks hung down on both sides of his face, and he curiously looked at you.

“Hi,” you greeted, suddenly fearing you had walked up to the wrong house.

“Hi,” he grinned back a little confused.

“Sorry, is this the house of the Way family,” you asked, making him laugh.

“Yeah it is, but Donna and Donald are out.”

“I’m here for Gerard, actually,” you explained, “my name is (y/n); I’m an old friend of his.”

The man turned around in the door, and shouted towards the back of the house.

“Gee, you got a guest!”

Voices grew loud behind the guy, who turned back to you.

“I’m Frank by the way,” he introduced, but a moment latter a familiar face appeared over his shoulder.

You recognized Mikey immediately, and laughed as you saw his surprised face.

“Oh my god! (y/n)!” Quickly he pushed past Frank, and hugged you. “What are you doing here?”

“Paying your brother a visit,” you explained.

“Knew you’d come back eventually!”

Another familiar face popped up behind Frank, this time it was your classmate Ray, who Gerard and you had just started befriending before you had moved away.

“You’re not getting rid of me so easily,” you joked, before you hugged Ray too, “I mean, what’s going on here? Big party?”

“We’re having a band rehearsal,” Mikey proudly informed you.

Yes, that sounded like something the Way brothers would do.

“(Y/n)?”

Everything else stepped in the background when you saw Gerard appear in the corridor. His hair was longer than it had been back at school, he looked pale and had lost weight, but he was still as beautiful as you remembered.

“Hi, Gee,” you smiled shyly.

The other three seemed to notice that this would take a while, so they quietly retreated back into the house, giving the two of you some space.

“What- what are you doing here?”

“Thought I’d pop by, say hello. I can leave if you don’t-“

You could not finish your sentence, because Gerard had wrapped you in a bone crushing hug, that pressed all air out of you. Quickly you hugged him back, feeling your mind going dizzy at all the memories that came flooding back to you; the smell of the house, the laundry soap Mrs Way used, Gerard’s so unnoticeable but calming scent.

“Come in, we’re almost done with rehearsing,” Gerard offered, once he had let go of you, “you can hang out with us, and then we can go on a walk or something, catch up?”

You nodded happily, and followed your former neighbour into the familiar house.

The rehearsing was not as quickly finished as Gerard had hoped, but you did not care. Curiously you watched the band for almost three hours, before Mikey confessed that he was too tired to continue rehearsing, and needed a break. Together with everyone you walked back to the door, and after you had said good bye to Frank and Ray, you and Gerard put on your own coats and shoes, and went outside, to go on the walk Gerard had suggested.

It was interesting to see what had changed about the area. There was still the playground you had played in as a toddler, but there were new climbing frames, and the old slide had been replaced as well. You were sad to find out that the building, in which your favourite bakery had been placed, had been torn down. You and Gerard had always picked up your breakfast there, when you were in a hurry.

Gerard told you how, when the city council had announced the decision, a lot of people had protested and filed a petition, but of course nobody had listened. Finally you reached the small park where Gerard and you had hung out many times after school. The pond was still exactly as you remembered it, even the ducks were as cocky as the last time you had been here.

“So… for how long are you staying here,” Gerard eventually asked.

You could tell that he had been wanting to ask this for a while now. Nervously he looked over to you, and you smiled a little.

“Not sure,” you admitted, “for a long time I hope. I got a job close by our old school, and unless they fire me immediately…”

Quietly you giggled at Gerard’s happy expression.

“So you’ll be around,” he asked excitedly.

“Yeah, that’s the plan,” you told him.

“Then… I don’t know, this is weird, because we have literally not seen each other in years, but… would you like to go out some time? I mean, we went to that prom, and if you hadn’t moved away… and I just feel like we still get along so well, and-“

“I’d love to,” you smiled, feeling your heart beat faster at Gerard’s question, while his rambling reminded you so much of the boy you had known.

“Really?”

“Definitely,” you assured him, and to emphasise, you brushed your fingers against his.

“That’s… neat,” Gerard grinned, making you playfully roll your eyes.

“Yes, it is,” you agreed, and a moment later you felt how Gerard hesitantly took your hand.

For a while you walked down the path in the park, hand in hand. But after not too long Gerard started asking you about the comics you had read recently and you knew that finding the courage to ring his doorbell had been the best thing you had done in a long while.

~*~*~*~

Taglist (if you want to be added or taken off, please let me know):

General: @justawriterinprogress @robinruns @jayloverthe3rd @lookalivefrosty @butterfly-writes @angelevansfalls @rene-royale

#gerard way fluff #gerard way x reader #gerard way x reader fluff #gerard way imagine #cute #fluff #fanfiction #fanfic

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jasmine-jules · 4 years

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How You Say My Name

This is for @startrekkingaroundasgard birthday writing challenge! I can’t believe I actually wrote something, it’s been so long since I have and I forgot how good it feels. This is a scene exploration/rewrite of one of the final scenes in The Timeless Children. Hope you enjoy!

13th Doctor x Yazmin Khan

1606 words

Prompt: I feel like the world is coming to an end

~~~~~~~~~~

“Any explosives left?” The Doctor asks Ko Sharmus. She has an idea, but…

“One. Emergencies only,” he pulls the bomb from his belt. Holding it like it would go off any second, which, in the condition it’s in, it could.

“Timer?”

“Hand detonation only.”

And there it is. Every time. Why can’t she just have one easy win, one without the deadly strings attached,

“Yeah. Course.” A tired smile falls on her lips, attempting to embrace the same old choice, “I’ll take it.” She pulls it from his hands, meeting the dreading look in Ko-Sharmus’ eyes.

“So, come on. Doc, what’re you thinking?” Graham asks, not quite wanting to accept the plan the Doctor’s slowly been forming. She refuses to look up from the bomb for a second, her racing brain attempting to figure out another way. Any other way. Not one that leaves her friends. Her fam, behind and alone. Again. Her mind can’t help but remember all the other times she’s had to make this choice. Rose. Donna. Amy. Clara. And now them.

“One option left.” She finally gives in, and looks up. The air feels empty between them, he knows what the Doc plans to do. But he doesn’t want to quite let it be a reality. The Doctor lifts the shrunken cyberman up. She feels the weight of her companions eyes on her, Yaz and Ryan share devastated looks before she continues.

“I have to use the death particle on Gallifrey.” Those words make her plan real, the finality of what she’s choosing to do sinks in, “On my home.” The Doctor’s gaze finally lands on Yaz, her big, beautiful brown eyes wide and scared, “On The Master and his new breed of cybermen.”

“You sure you wanna do that?” Ryan asks, imploring her to give an answer anything but yes, that The Doctor will figure out another way.

“I’m sure I don’t want to do that,” The Doctor admits, this new regeneration a lot more willing to confess her fears. Her emotions are closer to the surface than they were before, ready to spill over at a moment's notice, “but there’s no alternative. If the Master and the cybermen get off this planet, his home that he burned to the ground. Then what do you think he’s willing to do to a place that he didn’t grow up in? A place that we didn’t share a childhood together? They’ll be unstoppable.” The Doctor allows herself to look at everyone in the room, her family, the last humans from this time, in this corner of the universe that haven’t already been killed,

“I started this, with Shelley and the Cybrium, now I have to finish it. Alone.” The Doctor finishes, her eyes locking with Yaz’s once again. Her final word brings her back to when she declared in the basement of the mansion in Geneva that, in the end, she’s always alone. At the top of the universe, making the worst kind of decisions. It started when she had to make the choice to burn Gallifrey during the Time War. It’s only fitting that she’s going to die alone, too, making those some of the same choices. Her final word also startles Yaz out of her shock at the Doctor’s plan,

“What?”

But the Doctor continues as if Yaz hadn’t spoken, “The TARDIS will take you back to Earth. All of you. You can settle in the 21st century.”

“You’re not serious.” Ravio blurts out. She’s not sure how she feels about the Doctor deciding her fate for her. On one hand, they’ll all be safe, the threat of the cybermen gone. But on the other… This time is their home, their dead families are here, and the 21st century, no matter how safe, will bring them back.

“Deadly.”

“What about you?” Ryan interjects, “You detonate that thing, you’ll die too. Even with all your power to escape death, no one can escape that. You’ll be gone. Forever.”

“That’s the way it has to be.” She knows that all three of her friends are staring at her, their eyes pleading with her to not do this. But she can’t help but focus on Yaz. Yaz, who’s been all but silent, her inability to speak over the wave of emotions sweeping away any thought clear enough to put into words.

“And I would do that in a heartbeat for this universe. For you. My fam.” The Doctor finds herself scanning the room again, but somehow, always returning to Yaz. No matter how hard she tries, she can’t look away from the woman she’s become so close with. The woman she’s… The Doctor doesn’t let herself finish that thought, every time she’s had one similar, it’s only ended in pain. She abruptly turns away and makes her way to the TARDIS exit, the longer she stays in here with them, the harder it’ll be to leave.

“We’re not letting you go.” Yaz races forward, “You’re not doing this!” She pulls the Doctor’s arm back, grabbing her hand, using every ounce of her soul to plead with the Doctor, her new universe, to stop. To not leave her.

“Get off me, Yaz!” The Doctor tries to stop her voice from breaking, but it does so anyways, slipping through the facade she tries so hard to keep up for her friends. She turns to face Yaz, letting herself search every shade of brown that Yaz’s eyes seems to hold. She sees her eyes fill with tears, and she can’t stop her own from doing the same. In the past, it was always them who left her, whether by choice or by the will of the universe, but this time it was the Doctor’s choice. And somehow that made it a thousand times more painful. She strives to communicate that with Yaz, that it’s not easy. It’s not easy to leave behind the person you care about so much, but it’s better than letting you both die.

“Yaz. Please.” The Doctor continues, she begs Yaz to make this a little bit easier. And for a moment, Yaz lets her, nodding ever so slightly, as if saying, Fine. I’ll let you go. But I’ll hate you for it.

The room is silent, and Yaz fights every muscle in her body to not grab the Doctor, to stop her from leaving any way possible, even if it means confessing to something she’s tried so hard to push past.

“Yaz.” Ryan starts. Graham jumps, not expecting Ryan to speak, “Come on.”

Even though she half agreed to the Doctor leaving just a few seconds ago, she can’t get herself to step back. Words force their way past her lips, if the Doctor’s going to sacrifice herself for them, for her, how can she stay silent,

“No. You can’t leave us. Leave me. How you say my name… That tells me more than a thousand words. I can’t ignore that, and neither should you. And if I’m right, then how are you okay with leaving us alone. Without you. You’ve become my life, and there were times I wondered how long I could go on, but now I’m realizing, I don’t know how to go on without you.” The air is heavy, her words filling the space between the two of them. The Doctor’s eyes still try to say more than her words could. The words that normally talk their way out of problems, nowhere to be found. For some reason, she can’t.

“Live great lives.” The Doctor turns as if Yaz hadn’t just poured her heart out. The finality of the words she just spoke press down heavily on her shoulders. She’s said something similar before, to Rose, to someone who she had never quite admitted her feelings for. Letting her go for the sake of the universe. And now, she’s doing it again.

“No!” Yaz screams. She tries to grab the Doctor again, to pull her in and never let her go, but before she can, Ryan’s arms trap her. She struggles to get free, to stop the Doctor from being able to step through the doors of the TARDIS.

“I’m sorry,” The Doctor says, before shutting the doors behind her. She falls against the TARDIS, her legs not able to hold her up. She can hear Yaz’s sobs echo through the cracks of the door. She forces her feet to move, away from Yaz and towards the Master. She moves numbly through the halls of her home, and hears the TARDIS’s comforting noise fade into nothingness as it takes her fam back to theirs.

In the TARDIS, Yaz goes limp in Ryan’s arms, hardly registering Ko Sharmus’ movements as he slips through the doors just before it leaves Gallifrey, not quite realizing what it could mean for the Doctor. All she knows is that The Doctor left her. She left her without saying anything but “Live great lives.” Those words feel empty, how is she supposed to live a great life without the Doctor? All the good they did together, all the lives they saved, all their adventures, and it’s over.

“I know it feels like the world is ending right now, Yaz, but the Doctor gave us the chance to go on. To live our lives and take all we learned and all our memories with us, she’ll never truly be gone, Yaz.” Ryan murmurs gently, not letting Yaz fall.

The TARDIS shakes as it lands, and Yaz pushes herself to support her own weight and walk out the doors, only not to Gallifrey or some strange, new planet,

“We’re home. She got us home.”

#nicolas23rdwc #doctor who #thirteeth doctor #thirteen x yaz #yazmin khan #ryan sinclair #graham o'brien #the timeless children #my writing

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wannawritefast · 3 years

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Whiplash: Chapter 1- Playing Defense

A/N: Hey, y’all. I know the prologue didn’t get a whole lot of attention but I’ve written a substantial amount for this and I am VERY proud of how much I’ve written and what I’ve written. Also, huge shoutout to @andtheswordwentsnickersnack for beta reading this beast of a fic that I’ve been working on for WAYYYY too long LMAO...

Pairing: BoRhap!Brian May x fem!Reader

Prologue

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, awful men, sexism

You loved your family. Really, you did.

But there were times, and many times they were, that you would have been more comfortable ripping your own hair out strand-by-strand than having to sit through another session of verbal abuse.

You weren’t entirely certain what you had done, if anything, to deserve such discrimination from your grandfather, father, and brother amongst a few cousins and uncles. It was like 3 generations of men in your family had decided to use you as a verbal punching bag.

You still vividly remembered the time you had told them that you didn’t particularly appreciate how they talked to you. They laughed right in your face and told you to grow a thicker skin. That Y/l/n’s were a tougher breed than most and that if you couldn’t handle it then maybe you weren’t of their blood.

October break wasn’t any different. Your family had met up for your annual dinner together aside from Christmas.

“And what about you? When are you going to settle down, Y/n?” your grandfather quipped after shoveling a spoonful of mashed potatoes. “I want some great-grandbabies!”

Before you could even open your mouth in response your brother, James, chimed in. “I wouldn’t count on anyone banging her anytime soon.”

“Well,” you chuckled, “would you look at who’s talking?” James grumbled to himself and threw a pea at you which you successfully evaded. You turned your head to address your grandfather. “And I’m not your only grandchild. You have a grandson too, you know.”

You nodded toward your brother and your grandfather hardly even blinked at the last sentence. He either didn’t hear you or didn’t care. Proof that he used any and every opportunity to undermine you. Your grandfather scoffed and mumbled to himself gruffly.

You practically heard your father’s eye roll. “Your career is only so fulfilling.”

“Dad, I’m an astrophysicist and a damn good one, I’d like to think. If my career wasn’t fulfilling enough, I’d be seriously questioning all of the time and money I spent at university writing my thesis and graduating top 5 in my year.” You took a bite out of your roll. Why did you have to defend yourself every time you came home? It was exhausting!

“I’m just saying that you aren’t fully happy until you’ve settled down.”You rolled your eyes at your father. You didn’t have the time to focus on your love life. You barely had time to do your studies as it was. Furthermore, no man you had met seemed to like you after finding out you were an astrophysicist. Nobody seemed to click with you well.

“Why do I need more than my career to be fulfilled in life?” You asked seriously.The whole table laughed at your question. Even the kiddie table laughed but it was just hive mind reflex. You certainly did want to get married and have a family someday but you were making a point to your father. Who was he to dictate what made you happy?

“Please, Y/n,” James piped up again, “that’s what lonely people say to feel better about themselves.”

Ouch. That one stung more than you should have let it. You took a drink to keep yourself from letting a tear roll.

“Who ever said that she’s single?” Your sister spoke suddenly. You coughed and sputtered on your drink. Your neck turned to Donna so swiftly that you probably could have snapped it.

“Are you implying that my eldest daughter is dating a boy,” your mother raised her brows at you conspiratorially, “and didn’t tell me? Is it that smart, goofy boy you fancied at university for the longest time?” She couldn’t seem to keep a grin from spreading across her face.You flushed red at her question. Nobody needed to know that. Except now they did because you were, apparently, no longer single. Everybody at the table locked their eyes on you, muttering to each other. You looked at your sister in panic.

“Go on,” her voice cracked and she cleared her throat before bringing her cup to her lips. “Tell them about your boyfriend.”

Gee thanks… She had just started digging you into a hole.“Wait just a second! Let’s rewind a moment.” James questioned incredulously. “My sister, the stick in the mud astrophysicist, has a boyfriend? Why haven’t you mentioned him before?”

“It’s not relevant who I may or-” you looked at your sister pointedly; she fiddled with her fork “-may not be dating.” The fact that James wasn’t buying it was making you quite nervous. You were more offended though than anything. “Is it really so hard to believe that I’d be dating someone?”

“Yes!”

“Believe it, James” Donna insisted, pointing her fork at him. Put down your damn shovel!

“Have you banged him?” Your brother asked in the silence.

You picked up your drink and splashed him in the face. Your mother softly scolded you for your actions but you were completely unapologetic for what James more than deserved. How you shared the same DNA with such a tool was beyond you…

“That is hardly your business,” you snipped. You turned and stared down Donna. You were going to have to tell them the truth…

“Ok, that’s quite enough,” your mother stopped everything. Oh, thank the Lord. “We’re here to talk about your sister not her boyfriend.” Thank you, mother. “She’ll just have to bring him over for Christmas!”

You stood up from your chair and it scraped along the floor. What had you done…“That’s ridiculous! What if he wants us to spend time with his family for Christmas?” Why were you even going along with this? Why were you defending your hypothetical boyfriend?

“Then you can split the time between the two!”

“What if he doesn’t want to meet you guys yet?” You suggested. This hole is getting awfully big, Y/n. “Meeting parents is a big deal!” The statement came out as more of a question than a defense. You were honestly hoping for one, just one, objection to stick. “I don’t want to scare him off.”

“Who wouldn’t want to meet us?” Your mother asked. You resisted the urge to answer the question.

“Well, what if we’re not even together anymore by that time?”

“Wow, you really can’t hold onto a man for that long, Y/n? It seems to me like you would have been making this whole thing up if you are ‘broken up’ by then.” James finished wiping his face with a napkin after his encounter with your drink. You locked eyes with him. He was onto you.

“I’m not making this up,” you lied. Apparently you hadn’t put down your shovel yet either.“Then bring him home for Christmas,” James challenged. “Otherwise we’ll know it's a lie.”

Your family was on the edge of their seats and, for the time being, the logistics of the challenge didn’t matter. You were fed up with your brother constantly tearing you down. You were tired of your father not being pleased with anything you did. And you were exhausted by your grandfather’s insistence that you were nothing more than a source for great-grandkids. You got no respect at work and you certainly didn’t get any damn respect at home.

And so you did it. You extended your arm toward your stupid brother’s stupid hand and grasped it firmly with a shake.

“You’ve got yourself a deal, brother dearest.”

[{...}]

Eventually the extended family left and you went to your sister’s bedroom since you were sharing the room and the bed for break.

“Why in the bloody hell would you do something like that?!” You lowered your voice so that your family, more specifically James, wouldn’t hear you. Your sister sat on the bed cross-legged, fiddling with the ends of her hair.

“I’m sorry!” Donna yelled. You shushed her as you brushed your hair. “I couldn’t just watch. James crossed a line with that comment. I just wanted to wipe that stupid smile off of his dumb face.”

“Watch your language, why don’t you?” You teased. She rolled her eyes at you. “But I was fine, honestly. I’m used to it.”

“You shouldn’t be!” You hissed at Donna to be quiet again. “It was nice for them to shut up for a few moments and see you as a normal human being.”

Your heart was warm but you were in a state of complete panic. “That’s such a sweet sentiment in such a terrible circumstance!” You dug your fingers into your temples and threw yourself onto the bed. “What am I supposed to do? I can’t just go up to a guy and say ‘I need you to be my fake boyfriend because my sister dug me into a bloody hole’! You know I can barely get guys to talk to me on a casual basis!” Your voice dropped in volume, no louder than a whisper. “What makes you think that I can get one to play my boyfriend?” You let out a frustrated sigh.

“I honestly did not foresee the consequences of my actions and I am very sorry.”

“Do you think?” You growled to yourself. “Bloody hell… what am I going to do?”

Your sister scratched the back of her neck. “I mean, you have time… It is only October…”

“But I’m going to have to find someone eventually… if I find one.” You gnawed on a fingernail.

“You’ll be fine!” Donna breathed. She curled herself into the blankets next to you. You felt sick to your stomach.

“Yeah…,” you inhaled deeply, “and I’ve got time…”

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