#HOPEFULLY they don't take as long as Begin did haha I learned a lot doing Begin and it took about 4.5 months

[radioapplerevue]

Radioapple Fic Recs

Finally got around to organizing a rec list. Going to pin this, since I see people ask for recs a lot. I expect I'll be updating this periodically, too, as I've only just started adding things to it.

These are my personal favorites. For context, I'm an almost 40 year old aroace person whose favorite fics tend to be those who take you apart and then put you back together, haha. Putting them under a read more because I expect this to get long.

The Ruination of Lucifer by @syaunei. (Explicit)

Remember what I said about taking apart and being put back together? Nothing has come close to toppling this fic for me when it comes to emotional catharsis. One of the things I love most about it is how directly it deals with Lucifer's severe depression and the consequences of it, as well as the many, many centuries of him having to deal with just being Who He Is, Where He Is. He's terribly wounded and suffering, but he's also indisputably the King of Hell, with all the power and all the knowledge and all the experience that comes with it.

This fic also stands out for being from Alastor's POV, which I love, because as much as this fic is called The Ruination of Lucifer, the subtitle could be "How Alastor Fucked Around and Found Out". Both of them are getting broken down here, and both of them are -- hopefully -- learning how to grow and move forward. It also takes into account Alastor's asexuality and his unconventional approach towards sex, and what it can (or can't) do for him.

Mind the warnings, though, because shit does get heavy in here for a while. And enjoy the gorgeous illustrations by @betti2024.

2. Lucifer and his Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Relationship by @keelywolfe (ratings vary by part)

This series has me in a chokehold. It's considerably softer than many Radioapple fics, but it really draws you in and makes you so invested in these two idiots and how much they care about each other but also how bad they are at understanding how much they care about each other. It's Lucifer's POV, which causes Suffering not only because he's an incredibly unreliable narrator, but because there's Something Going On with Alastor that we know nothing about except that it's Bad. And we (and Lucifer) are dyiiiing to know what it is, haha.

There is a lot of sex in this series, but there's something about it that's very compelling to me, especially from Alastor's side. The way he is written in these encounters is just so... tender. It's obvious that (most of the time) he's not getting anything really in terms of sexual gratification, but he's getting a great deal in terms of gratification of a different sort, and the fact that it's so clear that he derives as much -- or perhaps more -- pleasure from that as Lucifer does from the sex itself is so delicious.

But my favorite aspect of the whole thing is that no matter what conflicts are going on -- whether outside of themselves, or of their own making -- Lucifer has become Alastor's safe harbor. And that kills me.

3. Bedtime Rituals to Try Out Before the Next Angelic War by @miribalis (teen and up)

Did I mention I like soft? Because I do. And there's something so lovely about the slow, careful way their relationship progresses here, especially on Alastor's side. My issue with this fic is that it ended, haha! I was so looking forward to seeing where it went, because I got addicted to the particular tender rapport that the two of them built. But being left wanting more is hardly a knock on the fic itself, and it's absolutely a treat to get to read.

4. devils don't fly (don't expect me not to fall) by @corgiss (mature)

I think it's becoming apparent that I really enjoy fics that begin with the two of them butting heads, and sometimes stumbling into a huge blunder, only for them to slowly grow together into something much softer than either of them likely intended. This is one such fic. It also involves some fun stuff with the rest of the cast, and a masquerade. Gotta love that.

5. All changed, changed utterly by @tollingreminiscentbells (explicit)

This series is very different from the rest. It's a canon AU where Lucifer and Alastor first met when Alastor was still alive, and then proceeds to go into canon events from there, with Lucifer being the one holding Alastor's leash. There's a lot to chew on, and the author has chosen to go a very different route regarding biblical mythology than the show does. Definitely something I recommend if you want a deep dive into a really meaty series, that delves into both the dynamics of Heaven vs. Hell as well as the worth of free will, as embodied by Alastor (for better or worse).

It also includes one of my new favorite recurring things, which is Alastor's 'delusional not-sex'. (It's sex.)

6. Of Saints and Sinners by @morningstarwrites (teen and up)

This fic is probably the most lighthearted of the radioapple fics I read, haha. It's a fun romp and has definitely made me laugh out loud on more than one occasion. So if you're looking for something that preserves that antagonism-to-grudging-friendship-to-oh-no-we've-caught-feelings kind of story, but with more comedy and less angst, this is the fic for you! (I mean, I have no idea if angst is going to happen in the future, but so far.)

7. hit me where it hurts (the bruising will be worth it) by RestlessWanderings (mature)

This one can only be called radioapple if you squint, but I'm including it because a) it's by far my favorite take on the hotel battle scene, b) I love when Lucifer gets fucked up and people get scared for him and c) it's technically part of a radioapple series. I don't know if that series is still going to happen, but I do enjoy this plenty on its own!

Hold here for more! There are a bunch of fics I’m following but am unsure if they’ll ever be finished — which is fine, writers don’t owe us anything! But it will definitely determine how high up they are on my favorites, haha. And of course people are posting new ones all the time.

[therhythmafterthesummer]

it's been a while rhythm!! how is everyhting??

i have yet to read some of your latest works, but life has been a little bit hard lately and i found myself missing our dearest pack 🥺 unfortunately i don't have time rn to re read my fav one shots, but this week it's being kind of a parenthesis and i can breathe a little 一some needed rest before i dive in university life again.

i've seen what other anons said about the girls gang (wereroomies, i mean) hanging out together and supporting each other. even with their hobbies, and i keep finding confort on pretty because i feel like i have so much in common with her. those asks helped me a lot because university is a lonely period, at least at the beginning and in my experience, so reading about how they enjoy their time together made me realise i have to appreciate those little moments i have with my friends (who aren't studying the same degree as me, unfortunately i don't see them as much as i would like to).

these months have made me more mature, but in a good way. i have been carrying a very heavy load for years and little by little i'm noticing how it weighs me less and less, so i'm very happy rn. i'm in that kind of mood when i want to spread that happiness with everyone (so if you're reading this, known that you're amazing and loved and you deserve so much more that you think you do ♡).

oh, i also remember one time you mentioned that one hobby that pretty has is crochet!! i started this summer haha i crochet when i'm stressed, with a nice playlist 一which reminds me of skz's comeback!! what are your fav songs?? (mine comflex and cover me 🤭).

what i wanted to ask (this is a very chaotic ask i'm sorry) is how did pack members cope with loneliness and stressful seasons in university?? especially when they felt like there was no one they could tell how they felt, if that was the case...

i know i don't interact a lot, but i missed talking to you. have a nice day/night rhythm!! ily (❤️‍🩹)

things are doing fine! i'm tired but soon i'll be on holidays so i'll be able to rest lots hopefully~

don't worry, baby. my works will be there for when you have time💜💜💜 no need to stress about that, you've got enough of that in your life.

makes me happy that you can find some comfort in the silly conversations we've got going on in this blog. i'm glad people are kind enough to send in their thoughts and we can just have some fun with them together!

good friends should really be appreciated, and it's always worth it to nurture and maintain friendships, even if it's in a sort of cactus way (as in, maybe you don't meet often, but you know you can rely on them when you need them, you know what i mean?). that's really especial, so i hope you get to enjoy it to its fullest!

yes! i like to think pretty does crochet as a hobby, she just seems like she would, for some reason??? so yes hahah. i want to include it on an actual instalment at some point. it's cool that you picked it up too, though! it's really fun imo. putting a nice playlist or some video essay on youtube while you crochet is a good way to de-stress mewhehe.

i think my fave songs from the album so far are megaverse and social path (kor ver). all of them are good, but those two have me in a chokehold for sure.

as for your question...... here's the thing. werewolves live in packs for a reason, right? so, their pack was probably the biggest support they had in moments like those. i suppose they would've tried to lean on their friends, or to try and step back for a moment to put things into perspective. engaging in activities outside of school was probably a good outlet as well (like going on wolf runs, or going for a walk), just things they could do to remind themselves that there was life outside uni, and that ultimately it wasn't a race, they were there to learn, so as long as they learnt a bit, they could take their time.

i feel like Chris particularly would've struggled a lot, considering he was living alone alone during his first and second year. i can see him making the extra effort to meet with changbin and jisung weekly (or every two weeks) to avoid lone wolf syndrome.

thank you for dropping by and leaving this message! i hope that weight you're carrying continues getting smaller and smaller💜

[true-blue-sonic]

12, 27 and 37 for Espilver :>

My bois!💕

12. How did they get together?

I wrote a whole fic about this (New Beginnings), so I'll summarise the main ideas of that ^-^ After the events of Rivals 2, Espio deems Silver too injured to travel back to the hopefully-saved future, and thus takes his new friend along to the Chaotix Detective Agency to recuperate. There he learns that Silver's social skills and knowledge about the world of the past are basically non-existent... not helped by the fact Sonic's putting himself square into the whole situation, and Silver can't stand him! Slowly Espio and his friends teach Silver about how living in the past works while unravelling more about his experiences in a ruined future, while Espio increasingly realises he's having feelings for Silver. Silver himself is also aware the way he feels about Espio is different than for the others, except he cannot put that in words yet, and he's got enough to worry about anyway with the future and the idea his time-travelling might have caused a paradox. There's a lot more going on, but eventually the two of them put their feelings into words, and decide they want to stay together in the past and thus become a couple. New Beginnings is 195k words long, so this is the very short version, but basically tl;dr Silver stayed in the past after Rivals 2 with Espio and things went from there.

27. What other couple would your otp get along with?

Hmm... maybe Vector and Vanilla? I don't think about the two of them much, but Vanilla would adore doting on Silver and Espio for sure, haha. And I can see Silver be good friends with Blaze as well once they meet, so if Blaze ever gets a partner, he'll probably do his best to befriend that person as well.

37. How do they cheer each other up?

Silver takes the angle of distractions: Espio is gonna get nuzzled, cuddled, tickled, or just have his ears be chatted off so he doesn't get to think about what is bothering him. I can see Espio be the type who just seethes in silence when it's about something he cannot have much influence over or after he got brushed off by the others, so in that way, Silver helps him get out of his mind and back into the world. Espio has long learned to be careful with his explanations about what was making him unhappy after he calmed down, because Silver can react quite passionately towards it! (Aka, he'll go in guns blazing and it might just make things worse, but at least Espio thinks it's funny and in that way gets cheered up even further, haha.)

Espio takes the more conventional route of comforting and thinking of a solution. He'll go sit with Silver and generally show him he's there to help out, and once Silver is ready for it, they'll talk it through and he'll help Silver to come to a satisfying end of the situation. It's a good balance for Silver to help calm down, since I can see him feel his anger or sadness much more strongly than Espio does.

[clicheyettouche]

HI THANK YOU FOR CALLING

Hi blog, it’s been a while. It’s already February, how time flies and in case you haven’t noticed I haven’t written any posts here in a long time. Well, I could blame it on being busy with my cruddy life but one of the main reason why I’m really busy is because of the, “Thank you for calling,” spill. Haha! Sounds familiar, isn't it?

Yeah...I became a Customer Service Representative, even I can’t even believe it since I hate talking to people. What I mean is I'm socially anxious introvert. So talking and socializing with people is not my forte. How do Gen Z call it? Ah, a nonchalant person! Damn, the things I do for money. I know this is a torture for me but being a call center agent is a blessing for someone like me. It's a challenge yes. Wala eh, given my qualifications, a call center job seems to be my only choice. It offers good salary and good benefits. I could cover our daily expenses and It’s not a bad choice given by my current situation and lack of degree…life is tough for someone like me and everyone knows that. Sabi nga nila diba, take your chances, who knows maybe you’ll find what you’re looking for on a career path. Hopefully luck is on my side in the next few months.

Hows the experience? It was a mix of getting cussed out all day and having to be 100% focused on my work all day that made me so anxious and depressed. Totoo pala 'yung sinasabi nila na being part of this kind of industry is really draining, mentally exhausting and not for the faint hearted. I couldn't even take a pee break without a penalty. Personally I don't really consider myself a strong one, pero kinaya ko at kinakaya until now. And it makes me proud that I did survive all of the hardships. Hindi talaga sya madali I know na walang madaling work but mind you, this is a whole different level of stress. I appreciate this blessing because it pays well enough pero I don't see myself staying here for the long run. If i have a choice baka matagal na akong nag resign, on top of that I did promise to myself na aalis din ako sa ganitong klaseng work. Why? With all the negativity? Please lord no.

The issue is the micromanaging, extremely high pressure and unrealistic expectations begin to take a toll on you. Hindi ka lang kasi basta nagtetake ng calls. Para kang nag intense training sa South Korea para maging Idol, laging may deliberation at kailangan laging maganda ang performance mo every month kai kung hindi ewan ko na lang talaga. Haha!

Pero kahit ganun...There’s a lot of things I learned from this kind of job. Everyone knows it’s rough. I mean this isn’t an easy job. You need to be disciplined and not sensitive. 

[thiscrimsonsoul]

Your take on the DH is actually so interesting and I love how you added something about Agatha! Because aside from all the similarities you mentioned (the gaunt cheeks, dark lips, etc) there's a particular one that stands out a lot: the HANDS! The black fingers! Agatha has black fingers in WV after we finally learn she's Agatha and not Agnes. Wanda has black fingers in MOM. I don't recall if evil!Strange had black fingers? But his face looked similar to Wanda's or Agatha's. Ugh BURN THE BOOK!

{out of paprikash} I think Agatha is worth mentioning because no one is born evil, heh. They’re made that way through pain, trauma, mental illness, general souring of their morality, or because of other circumstances. Agatha seems to have some trauma in her past (hopefully we’ll learn a lot more about the MCU version of her when her series comes out), so I think that’s what turned her into the vindictive, manipulative, and altogether sassy villainess we know and love, heh.

And yes... the black fingers. Honestly, I’ve only seen DSMoM once, and that was two months again, haha, so I really need to find time to watch it again so I can really watch for details. I don’t remember whether Sinister Strange or 616-Strange ever had the black fingers. It would seem to me that Sinister should have them, but I’m not sure about 616-Strange. Agatha had been using the book for a long time, like... centuries? Sinister... at least several years. But Wanda started getting at leas gray-tinged fingertips after her first couple times with using the black magic in WandaVision, so I might say yes he should have it, but I really don’t think 616-Strange did? If I remember correctly? So that means there’s a difference between him and Wanda. 

Maybe 616-Strange’s intentions were better, or he was starting from a less corrupted place than WandaVision-Wanda. By the time of WV, Wanda was already slipping in morality a lot, sometimes intentionally, sometimes unintentionally, whereas Strange up until that point always had altruistic or at least positive, helpful intentions even if he was dabbling in things he shouldn’t have. He did have the third eye at the end, which has been confirmed as the result of the DH’s corruption even after his limited use of it. So... maybe the difference is that arcane magic users get a third eye and witches get black fingers? If Sinister Strange didn’t have black fingers, then maybe that’s a rule we can assume, heh. But again, I’d have to watch the movie once more for detail to say for sure.

616-Strange also doesn’t have as much trauma as Comic!Strange or Sinister Strange, so maybe the level of corruption that’s possible and the speed at which it occurs has to do with how vulnerable/damaged a person is at the time, whether or not their morality is in a solid place or beginning to slip, and the type of spellcaster they are. And then of course there’s the option of the MCU just not being consistent and we’re overthinking this too much, haha. But oh well, it's fun to hash out details like this anyway, even if we end up being wrong later. XD

And yeah... the book needs to die. Well supposedly Wanda destroyed every copy of it everywhere, so all we have to worry about now are the Stranges with photographic memories that still have it up in their brains, heh.

[solradguy]

Thank you whoever it was that sent that Ko-fi tip!! I used it to get the ebooks for the other two GG light novels, Lightning the Argent (Ky focused) and The Butterfly and Her Gale (Chipp focused). It probably won’t be a few months yet before I can start work on either of them, but at least I have them now for when I’m ready to

[f1yogurt]

okokok so im not sure if you get this alot, but how do you get into f1??

i already love niki lauda, and rush, but i dont really know where to go from there? is there any specific youtube channels, blogs, websites ect that you could recommend? i dont really know where to start haha

Hi Anon!! Welcome to the F1 club. I'll just give you my kind of personal journey to learning F1, but this list isn't for everyone. Just what I did. Hopefully a few points can help!

If anyone would like to add suggestions to this list, feel free. Drop a comment if you want anon to follow you, @ f1 and classic f1 people!

To begin, here's the official F1 site where you can view basic info, the season calendar, driver standings, and updates about the sport.

list under the cut

Watch DTS. Everyone may hate me for this, but I got my hype for F1 by watching Drive to Survive. If you haven't seen that series on Netflix, I would highly recommend it. It gives an exciting, modern intro to the sport if you haven't had exposure to F1 before. Just remember to take the portrayal of drama/driver relationships with a grain of salt, because Netflix adds a lot of their own drama inaccuracies to it.

Watch F1 YouTube "tutorial" videos. I watched a ton of YouTube when I was just learning about F1. Search up basic things, like... very basic. Literally: What is F1? Why are there different tires? What is downforce? You only really get into a sport when you are able to understand it, and I promise you, F1 youtube will provide you with more than enough knowledge about the sport. I recommend the official Formula 1 channel, and maybe WTF1 for some funny stuff that can still teach you things.

Interact on social media. The F1 fanbase is huuuuge, and they're very active on social media. Probably more than any other sport's fanbase I've ever been a part of. Fans love talking about their teams, their favorite drivers, etc. You'll catch onto the drama very soon, and meet some very... opiniated people along the way. You can also follow the constructors' and drivers' personal accounts to get a feel of their motivations/personalities. You'll soon get to know everyone and then can develop a motivation for watching your favorite drivers.

Get in touch with F1's history. F1 has a very rich history with some great personalities and very talented drivers. If you're already into Niki and Rush, that's great! Some other big names you'll hear a lot are ones like Senna and Schumacher. Watch their documentaries. Watch other old drivers' documentaries. YouTube is once again a great resource for finding old F1 videos. Simply search up "Top 10 F1" and you'll have a long list of recommended videos that show iconic battles and drama between some of the legends of the sport.

Gradually start to watch the races or highlights of the races on Sundays, even if you don't understand what's going on most of the time. To me, modern F1 seems extremely boring if you don't know what's going on. There's nothing that really draws you in. But as you learn more and more about the sport, you can gain an appreciation for it.

Anyways, I hope this list is helpful! Best of luck getting introduced to the sport, and welcome to the group!

[sarahlevys]

For your clueless au!

1-15 thanks love u❤️❤️

you're so extra 🤪❤️

Rollin' With the Homies

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

it just happened! haha. i knew the movie had a first person narration and i expected to just do that for the very beginning and end, and then it felt weird to stop and suddenly switch to third... so i kept with it!

i also did some backwards math, assuming that alexis is 30 in 2018, and decided to set the fic in the 2000s instead of the 1990s, like the movie, because that's when the characters would've been this age.

2: What scene did you first put down?

i outlined and wrote everything in the order of the fic, so the beginning's the first!

3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

Between you and me, a lot of people like to treat me like I'm stupid. And I don't know why, since I'm perfectly smart! I just don't care to, like, worry about stuff that doesn't matter. But Twyla looks at me like the things I have to say actually are important, and that they aren't dumb. It just means a lot.

i thought a lot about how alexis would describe her relationship with twyla, since the fic was written in first person. i didn't want the narration to feel forced, like something she wouldn't say, and i also wanted it to ring true with the theme of 'being clueless' from the movie. i really like how this turned out.

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

"The truth is that I have been in love with you since that first weekend we spent together, when Mutt came into the picture but then you came home with me. I am so crazy about you, Twy, I swear I can't stop thinking about you. You make me feel like – like I'm not totally clueless, you know? Like I could be better. Like I could be the way you see me."

in the movie, cher doesn't really have a big romantic declaration to josh, but twyla's the tai character in this AU and part of alexis' journey in SC is how she learns to be brave with her emotions. so i always knew i wanted to write something like this. i like how it ties into the snippet from #3.

5: What part was hardest to write?

honestly, i wrote this fic super fast and it flowed really easily... it's probably the fastest i've ever written a fic. i think basing it off of a movie i knew really well and having a pretty detailed outline helped. i was writing 700+ words in 15 minute sprints 😅 that said, it was also exhausting to write so quickly, so i'd say deciding to take on a new fic and writing almost 10K in one week, while the fest was going on, was the hardest part.

6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?

the first person narration! i don't think i'm going to do it again, but i'm really happy with how it ended up.

7: Where did the title come from?

the classic brittany murphy scene from the movie, of course! given that twyla's tai, it was a no-brainer.

8: Did any real people or events inspire any part of it?

i based a lot of miscellaneous details about this fic on being in high school during the early 2000s, just like alexis and the gang.

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

nope!

10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?

why not?! haha. @schittposting requested this au a long time ago and it always stuck in my mind. and i'm a sucker for a happily ever after with a/t, d/p, and s/r, so it had to happen.

11: What do you like best about this fic?

i think it's fun to read! i wanted to write something fluffy and light and hopefully this delivered on that.

12: What do you like least about this fic?

i wish it was shorter, because i was busting my butt to finish it, lol, but i'm glad it turned out the way it is. i also wish i had more alexis and david moments in it.

13: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

anything from the early 2000s!

14: Is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?

that alexis and twyla are meant to be? 😌

15: What did you learn from writing this fic?

movie aus are fun!

(ask me questions about any of my fics!)

[catcze]

Oh, Catte, my beloved... The bracelet is so beautiful. Goodness, did I cry when I took it out of the envelope. It's almost as beautiful as you are, I love it so much! I'm never ever taking this off. Oh starlight I'm so happy, you may as well have just proposed! I love you so so much, thank you💜💜💜

I'm glad Cyno is doing well for himself these days! It's not really that complex of a spell, simple transmutation really, but I'm sure he didn't want to overwhelm you. He may not talk a lot but trust me; he cares. I should write him sometime, if only so the next time an emergency arises he won't think I only remember he exists when I need his help, hehe... I'm joking of course, he's not the kind of person to care. I do still owe him a favor though. Two, now that he's gone out of his way to teach my girlfriend magic, and specifically for helping you make me this wonderful present. Send along my thanks please, but please don't mention that I said I'd write him, just in case I somehow forget to. You know me, heh..

Also I'm a little surprised to hear that name again! Collei was quite the visitor when she was here a few years ago, it's a long story, and one I doubt very much she'd want me to tell. Suffice to say she and Amber are good friends, but I'm sure she already asked you about her as soon as you mentioned Mondstadt. I'm so relieved to hear she's safe, and studying medicine no less! Tell her I'm proud of her. She'll do great things in her life.

I must admit I'm slightly bothered to hear that so many scholars accosted my poor babygirl to ask if I'd return, I'm so sorry darling. If they give you any more trouble, oh I'll come visit alright. To dispense punishment(although I'd definitely grab some food on the way as we left). Speaking of food, that's so sweet of you to offer to learn the local cuisine just for me~ you're so thoughtful, it's one of the many many things I love about you. My reputation around the school is honestly the only accomplishment you'll find though sweetheart. I wasn't really all that social there, aside from talking to the professors and scholars. I couldn't afford to procrastinate if I wanted to learn everything I could. Funny, that sounds completely unlike me, now doesn't it~ Those lectures can be tiresome at first, did they provide you with the appropriate reading materials, or are you only listening? I still have my copy of the first semester alchemy textbook--it's only about 800 pages, but they're packed to the brim with knowledge. I still reference it sometimes.

Like I mentioned though, most of my time in Sumeru was spent at the Academy or at the local restaurants. If you wanted food recommendations, those I can provide, but unfortunately I won't be of much use otherwise. Sorry cutie~

[the next page of the letter is a list of local restaurants, many with recommended dishes written next to them. There's also a fair number of heart shapes and "I love you"s doodled around the edges of the paper]

I hope you'll try at least some of those and tell me what you think. The more you talk about it honestly, the more it's beginning to grow on me. I do want to go back and visit with you, my love. I miss it, even if I don't want to admit that. It would be so much fun to sight see with you, being able to just meander aimlessly through the city, not a care in the world, and with you by my side... That sounds amazing. I'd want nothing more. Perhaps for our honeymoon~? [the last sentence of the paragraph is crossed out with a single streak of ink cutting through it]

Your photos are all amazing, darling. I just wish I had as many to send you in return, but unfortunately I don't own a camera, nor can I afford to leave the library long enough to travel to Liyue and buy one. That being said, Albedo does have one, and he already took that first photo. Darling, I'm curious, and please, *please* say no if it would bother you even slightly. If I... Perhaps wanted to take some... Pictures, just for your enjoyment~ ...would you mind if I had Albedo continue to serve as the photographer? I want my baby to be thinking of me, especially since I'm not there to pleasure you myself~💜 again, PLEASE say no if you'd have any problem with that. Or I could ask Jean if that would be better. I just want to treat my princess to some candy~

That line is going to have me up all night, I swear. I do wish I was there for you in every sense, but goodness does my heart ache for you. I miss the way you taste so much, my precious little munchkin~ you're not going to sleep at all the first night you're back in my arms, I hope you know that. I'm going to edge you so hard you'll cry for me, hehe~ I'm a little peeved you didn't take notice of my comment about punishing you! There will be ropes involved when you return to me. Just the way you always like it, cutie~ tell me, how bad do you miss me? Miss my tongue you love so much~? Don't worry baby--you'll get everything you could ever want for when you come home. I can't wait to taste you~ goodness, excuse me a moment baby... I need to scratch an itch before I finish writing this letter, hehe...~

Okay, I'm back. That was quite the itch, it just kept coming back~ that picture you sent with this letter may have helped with that... Celestia, you're so so beautiful, my rose..~ I love you so much.

Where was I... Ah yes. I'm very glad you've been eating and sleeping properly. Such a good girl you always are~💜 and don't worry; I'm taking care of myself as well. I've been becoming more adjusted to the late nights lately, since your letters often arrive around this hour(it's 11:30 right now, although up until a page ago it had been 10:15, hehe...). I don't mind it at all, since you know I love to sleep in anyway. I love reading your letters sweetheart. They truly do carry your love across the distance. I'm so happy that you're my partner. I love you so so much. I reread your letters every day, they put such a smile on my face.

Also, what's this about ideas you're having ever since I mentioned the uniform? Tell me!! Pretty please~? 💜

I'm going to call my letter to a close here, before I end up needing a bigger envelope, hehe~ I love you so much, starlight. Please take care, and I hope you're well rested when you read this. Hopefully I can put a smile on your beautiful face. I just wish I was there to see it. I love you so much, take care and write me back when you can, promise~?

Yours Always,

- Lisa 🌺💜

Milddd nsfw here muaH <33

Hi, love, I’m so happy that you like your gift! I love you very much as well— hopefully it can give you comfort on some particularly hard nights where I cannot be with you, dearest. Sort of like a reminder that although I cannot be there with you in person, you always carry a piece of my heart with you, you know?

I’ll be sure to relay your message to Cyno and Collei! They were rather surprised when they found out I was your girlfriend, haha! In a good way, of course— they’ve been great company so far.

And don’t worry about the other scholars, Lisa dear. I can handle them plenty fine. I’m sure they’ll go running if I even so much as imply that you wouldn’t be pleased with them for their behavior, my love. They wouldn’t want to mess with one of the best sorcerers to ever roam those halls, you know?

Regarding the lectures, they offered to loan me some textbooks actually, but I had to turn them down since, well, I am just an observer, and carrying so many books with me to and fro would weigh me down. Still, although I sometimes get confused while I observe, It’s such a fun and interesting experience! I can’t say I’m remembering every bit of knowledge I hear, but I’ve definitely learned at least a thing or two.

Just yesterday, there was a bit of a lull in lectures that I was attending— something about one of the scholars who had agreed to host me taking their class out to fieldwork, and I was unable to accompany them. So I took the time to check out some of the restaurants you listed for me! I went to just one of them for lunch, since I didn’t want to get too full throughout the day, and I enjoyed it very much!! I included a picture of one of the dishes you noted for me (a best seller of theirs, apparently) and I didn’t regret purchasing it at all. It was so good! In my free time, it’s one of the recipes that I hope to familiarize and bring back home to you— I think you’ll rather like it, especially since there’s no meat. Hopefully I’ll get good enough at making it that you’ll be able to savor the flavor too!

Though, I don’t mind either if you’d rather return with me next time, and we can have a dinner date here? I really like the ambiance of the place— its both romantic and private. And the view from the balcony here is absolutely magical. Or we can maybe visit a couple of the other restaurants you’ve recommended to me? I doubt that I’ll be able to try all of them this time, and being able to experience it with you would make the experience a million times better.

Also, regarding the photos you mentioned— well, I’m fine with it if you are. As long as you’re comfortable with whoever is photographing you love, then it’s perfectly alright with me. Besides, I know that we’re devoted to each other, so there’s no cause for me to be uncomfortable 💞 If you so wish to grant me such photos, I eagerly await them, love! They’re not the same as you being here, of course, but I’m sure they could help me with how much I miss you.

And ah, sending such things only makes me miss you more! Perhaps I should take a good, long rest before I come back to Mondstadt, if you plan to keep me up all night. And who says I didn’t notice your comment? Perhaps I was just teasing you by keeping quiet about it, especially if I know what’s awaiting me back home. And yes, I miss you so so much, I miss your tongue and you lips, your touch on my skin, the way you hold me and make me feel so good each and every time— Love, really, if your intention with that letter was to get me all worked up, then safe to say you’ve succeeded. My, I doubt I’m going to be getting any sleep tonight, thinking of you.

And regarding that bit about the Academy uniform… well, I might have found a local seamstress who was willing to make me a version of it, tailored to my measurements. It’s not ready quite yet, but hopefully I can send you some photographs soon 💞

By the way, love, there’s no need to have to wait up for my letters, not if you’re not getting enough sleep! I don’t mind waiting a bit for your reply as long as I know you’re sleeping on time. I worry about you as much as you worry about me, so for both your sake and mine, promise me you’ll get enough sleep? Either way, though, I’m glad you’re taking care of yourself, dearest. It makes me happy, knowing that you and the others are doing well. I love you very, very much you know? Please continue to stay safe, dearest, and know that I’m always missing you.

And, well, regarding a proper proposal, though I can’t say I haven’t thought of it before (how could I not? I can fully envision spending the rest of my life with you) I would much prefer if I were able to give you the ring and ask you in person, love. That being said, take the bracelet as a promise that I’ll return to you soon— and hopefully with a ring that I think you’ll like and a question that I plan to ask you.

All the best wishes, dearest. I love you very much 💞

—Catte 💞

[shyrose57]

2: I will figure it out eventually and that's a promise.

3: Watson is aboustely heart broken and near tears multiple times as well hearing Ran in so much distress and actually crying. Jackie does cry, he attempts multiple times to hug Ran and make it known he's there to comfort him, but it only works sometimes, and when it doesn't work Ran gets scared and tries to get away believing an attacker has gotten him. Grievous is almost like silently grieving, knowing he can't do anything to help his close friend. Cletus feels bad, and since he isnt too good with emotions, focuses on instead attempting to cheer everyone else up. Isaac and Benjamin feel awful as they feel at fault for letting it happen, so to hopefully help they make plans on how to make Ran as comfortable and safe as can be while also getting him to a nearby town they heard about to hopefully reverse it. Charles is doing his damn best to comfort Ran while also distracting him from his own thoughts, which mostly means Charles (and Watson) play the role of story teller for a while. Ranbob is the hardest hit by it, he's suffering so much because he so badly just wants to go over and hug his little brother and comfort him, tell him that it'll all be ok and that Bobby would protect him. But also knows he can't because he knows that would most likely do nothing but make it worse. For a while he spends his time blocking his ears and wrapped in a comfort blanket trying to comfort himself, as everyone else tend to his suffering brother. One thing that makes it harder is that Ran begins to purr to himself in a vain attempt to comfort himself (cause I personally like to think Enderman hybrids are like cats and purr like them, when their happy, content, comfortable, but also to soothe themselves and heal wounds), when Ranbob knows Ran's never purred, so knowing he's so desperate to try it now hurts him. 

You will get some comfort, like Watson manages to convince Ranbob to at least hug Ran, and Ranbob manages to purr alongside Ran a bit, which does actually help to calm Ran down. Ran getting wrapped up with the fluffiest blanket they have and always having Watson, Jackie, or Grievous by his side. With Jackie tending to hold his hand. 

4: All of the above. Sudden touch can be overwhelming to Ranbob at times, especially when he's not doing well mentally. Also while in this state, touch reminds him of the desperate grabbing and touching of the people he killed that tried to escape or fend him off. And Dream was able to hurt Ranbob by starving and dehydrating him of course, but when Ranbob was being particularly disobedient and tried to fight back Dream would often take control and cut or stab Ranbob then gave back control as punishment. 

10: It does get better! Idk if I already said but Kelalen is actually where they get the antidote for Rans blindness potion! And when their given it for free and it works, they become very grateful to Adler and Lucia (the one who actually convinced Adler to give them the potion in the first place cause it was the only one left). And a few days after they arrive they actually decide to explore the town, where they meet Siren and get more information on Dream and who he was, they also get their weapons and armor repaired by them. But while talking with Siren, Cletus and Grievous sneak off and run into Atlas, then Cletus and Grievous agree to help Atlas with his prank. But by the end of their second week in Kelalen the group starts to truly enjoy their stay, Ranbob often saying how it kind of reminds him of Mizu before everything happened. 

12: Thats funny though and is exactly how I'd want to be seen.

13: *CLAPS HANDS* OH BOY DO I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU. I RECENTLY TOLD MY FRIEND ABOUT RANBOB SEEING HIS DEAD FRIENDS AND FAMILY BUT FAILED TO TELL THEM IT WASNT ACTUALLY PART OF THE STORY. SO THEY TOOK IT LITTERALY AND THEY HAVE GIVEN ME IDEAS, WHILE ALSO HELPING ME REALIZE THAT THIS COULD ACTUALLY BE USED TO SET UP FOR RANBOB MOVING PAST HIS TRAUMAS AND CAN LEAD TO MORE FLUFF AND ANGST. SO NOW IT IS PART OF THE STORY, WITH CHANGES THAT IT HAPPENED DURING A DREAM AND HE DIDNT BELIEVE IT AND CONSIDERED IT A CRUEL JOKE BY FATE ITSELF AT FIRST. AND YES BY AT FIRST I MEAN THIS HAPPENS MANY MORE TIMES.

Also my friend has a message for you, "HahA THEY BETTER THANK ME I SET THEM UP FOR MORE MISERY 😈😈 /j" (I wanna be safe so if you don't know /j means that their joking)

14: Im not doing Foolish and Dream brothers because I personally don't like/get it. But I was thinking maybe they meet Foolish after Mripat tells them that there was a member of the SMP who was said to be a god and immortal. And after some long conversations they decide to go hunt for this apparently immortal god. Which takes a while since no one actually knows where he is, just that he likes deserts, and have to go off possible sightings or hints in history books. And when they finally meet him they manage to learn about totems (which they previously didn't know about) and even get some. They also learn that infact even during the SMP time no one quite knew what Dream was, and learns the ways the SMP tried to permanently get rid of him. Foolish is also devastated to know that Dream infact survived and becomes determined to help them. Even offering his help that if they ever go back to Mizu to face Dream, he'll come along and help in anyway he can. 

15: I like to imagine Edward remembers Ranboo as the young troubled enderman that he basically adopted and took care of. So Edward sees Ranboo in both Ran and Ranbob, so he offers his help and advice. Basically becoming their Grandad, telling stories about everything he's seen. Especially about Ranboo because Ranbob is so curious about his ancestor he just cant help but ask. One convo I've been particularly thinking about goes something like, "Edward: Older one, what do you think your brother thinks about you? Ranbob: I..I think he doesnt like me, and that he wants me gone. Edward: Hmm, your wrong. Ranbob: What? Edward: When I look at Ran, I see a child, not an adult yet, scarred, scared and traumatized. A child that wishes you two were closer, that he could forgive you and wants to believe you, just so you two could be family again. But is afraid too, for he already has a family, that he is terrified of losing, and is scared if he attempts to trust you again that they may leave him. But make no mistake, your brother wants to make amends, your brother cares about you and wants you happy. He knows deep down that he can trust you, and that you are innocent, but you all must help him acknowledge those parts, and stand by him, helping him walk when needed, as he traverses his own nightmares." AKA I really want Edward to be the reason Ranbob realizes that Ran does want to be family again but needs help. Cause if I had to describe the brothers current positions with their trauma it'll be, Ranbob-Knows he has trauma and is trying to get better and live with it, willingly getting help. Ran-Is fucking drowning in trauma cause he refuses to acknowledge he has it and hides it well most of the time, also doesn't ask for help. 

2: I fear the day.

3: Hahaha, ow, ow, ow. That, overall, is...heartbreaking. At the same time though, it’s sweet to see everyone pitching in to do their best and help him. We got it with Ranbob, now we get it with Ran.

I am curious, though. From what you’ve said, Blindness potions don’t wear off immediately? Why’s that?

4: *Chants* Please punch Dream. Please punch Dream. Please punch Dream. How do the fishermen deal with this, and help Ranbob?

10: Oh, god, Ran’s blind when they arrive in town. That’s definitely a high tension situation. Not only have you got him out of commission, but everyone else high strung from it, and probably having their protective instincts in overdrive when they randomly get treated hostilely. What exactly does an antidote for blindness consist of? Do most potions have antidotes, or counters? Is milk no longer used, or is that not a thing in the AU? It does sound nice that they all end up making friends later on though. How does Ran adjust to having his sight back? And, y’know, having everyone see him like that, and his brother comfort him(if they aren’t on good terms at this point, the timeline’s confusing me a bit)

12: Throughout this conversation, every time I read something sad, the image struck me, and honestly, it’s what you deserve. If these keeps up, I’m gonna start inserting these little 🏹s every time you hurt my heart. 

13: I’m being conspired against. Does everyone see this? Brothers Anon and their friend are conspiring to break my heart. Such gremlins. What did I ever do to you two?

Also, you can tell your friend that from this point on, I will closely associate them with a tiny, purple, cackling imp. 

14: Huh. Why do they want to find Foolish? Curiosity? To learn more about the Smp? About Dream? Sounds like it has a lot of potential to be quite the interesting encounter. And, since they didn’t previously know about the totems, they probably wouldn’t notice if one activated in a certain situation where it’s popped...do with that what you will.

15: Anon, I love all of this. Tell me more about Grandpa Edward. Does he fondly look back to Ranboo being polite and quiet while Ranbob and Ran cause havoc in the background? Does he bake them snacks and tell them about Ranboo’s adventures, and how much he loved to mine-which, in hindsight, is kind of funny, considering you just mentioned that so few people follow Skeppy because of the mining, but apparently their ancestor did that thing for fun.

[vidalinav]

As someone that loves almost every character in ACOTAR but still wants to discuss their flaws and slip ups I really liked your post about Nesta and how she treated Feyre as a sister. None of the characters in ACOTAR are perfect. They have flaws and people in the fandom need to keep the same tone about all of them when it comes to that. Don't excuse one character and bash on the next. Like of course you can have your favorites, but Idk I just love seeing the characters as flawed rather than put them on a pedestal. Cheers 🖤

I mean I absolutely love flaws. I love Nesta for that reason. She’s such an imperfect, easily debatable character. Her interactions with others are amazing because of this, because she’s not so easy to be around, so she pushes a lot of boundaries or expands the way these characters have learned to adapt in their world. They’ve never met anyone who is not so easily swayed, which is obvious in all her interactions with them. Though I won’t get into it, since this post will be a thousand times longer. 

But I think if any character is most human-like, as in she is based on how someone in the real world would act, she’s probably the most authentic in my opinion. But authenticity requires a level of flaws that can’t be denied or overwritten. So, I really did want to stress that, that she can keep her mistakes, her cold demeanor, her sometimes harsh words, her standoffishness, her distrust many times, but at some point she’s going to have more character development and will she really exonerate herself and claim she played no part in her own life or the lives of her family members? She hasn’t before. She’s acknowledged that Feyre went out and kept them alive, but to what extent does she feel guilty or regretful or even blameless? Not specifically about that situation, but... the lack of friends, her relationship with her father, her sisters, or any close relationship before and after the trauma, her own wants, wishes, goals, the lack of purpose. In the case of the cabin, and now in the case of her father’s death, she’s really coping the same way. Someone else is supporting her, and she’s really mentally unhealthy and very closed off. You know maybe I’m taking a page out of my own psychotherapy textbook, but I think healing for her would require her to see more options, to be open to more opportunities, and for her to see the world and how she interacts with it a little bit differently where she has accountability for her own wellbeing and happiness, but also accepts the role she played in the past that she could’ve changed.

*But* if she copes that way throughout the series and she doesn’t allow anyone in and she unintentionally hurts someone’s feelings, for lack of a better term, then their feelings are still valid whether we understand them or not. That’s how POV’s work. A change in the narrative. And if in Feyre’s POV Nesta’s done wrong in some way even though some may not agree, even if Feyre herself has done wrong, it doesn’t mean we erase the mistakes as if they didn’t happen. I think to really analyze a character you need to see the whole character and not just the things that make them palatable or the things we’d rather ignore/excuse, even in the pursuit of defending them. As readers, we’re the third party observers, so we can see more things than the characters, but to Feyre for example, Nesta has an odd way of showing her love to the point where we have instances where she questions it throughout the series. It doesn’t mean necessarily that Nesta has to change or that she doesn’t love Feyre, but it also doesn’t make Feyre wrong to feel that way. or Elain or Cassian or Amren whatever happened to them. It also doesn’t make the Inner Circle wrong for not liking her, though the situation is more complicated than that. If Feyre’s hurt that Nesta won’t come to her after all they’ve through, after she’s reached out, and tried to help in the way that she knew how, then she is allowed to be hurt. And if Nesta’s perspective says that Feyre wronged her after what happens in ACOSF, even if Feyre had good intentions and explains her intentions, Nesta has been wronged. I think there’s a certain level of validity that we need to keep when discussing their interaction or any interaction, otherwise we start playing a blame game, when no one is at fault. It’s too complex to be simply one person’s fault and we know practically nothing of Nesta’s POV. It’s not Feyre or the Inner Circle’s fault that Nesta is in a bad way. But it’s not Nesta’s fault that Feyre sometimes feels hurt or betrayed or unloved. Which unfortunately makes the situation very complicated and quite oxymoronic. 

Also I think that sometimes people feel (which people have also said to me) that discussing Nesta’s flaws is a direct attack on her character, because other character’s flaws are not as highlighted in the fandom nor Feyre’s POV. But I think that in itself is a whole other post. Because Feyre has grown up with Nesta, and she has seen her in so many lights, and she’s really only beginning to know how the Inner Circle are truly when the wars are over and the dust has settled. You know, they took her in when she was really low and in an emotionally abusive relationship and having had a traumatic experience with the Amarantha situation, and they supported her and her decisions. So, I find that it would be hard to really expect that from Feyre where we ended in ACOSAF. But this of course doesn’t mean that we can’t dislike a character or question why they do things. It just means that we can dislike a character for a lot less than having to make one character seem inherently greater than another and making people feel bad about it. They all offer value to the series that we all are so obsessed about. But also we as posters can’t reasonably post essays. Like I can’t post something discussing Nesta’s flaws and a specific circumstance and then equally talk about several other character’s flaws in the same post to make everyone feel better and sure that I’m not taking a side. 

Which is what I try to get at sometimes when people comment and they seem a little bit too aggressive. Which is why I really don’t like the whole anti/pro debacle, even though I understand the practicality of being able to filter certain posts you see on tumblr because of those hashtags. Thankfully there hasn’t many people who are uber aggressive and honestly I block a lot of people who continually post things in which they don’t allow their opinion to be challenged in any way. Because at the end of the day, none of us are wrong, but... some I’d say are more right than others--simply because they have and use textual evidence to back up their claims or they make reasonable connections that don’t stomp on anyone’s opinions and open up a discussion in which everyone exchanges their ideas. There are so many posts I absolutely adore in either direction, because of how well-rounded they approach the topic. 

That being said, quite honestly that post that thankfully you appreciate, absolutely drives me insane. Every time someone likes it or comments I get so afraid that it’s going to be someone telling me off. But I’m a very anxious person so that’s probably why, but also I’ve seen many people being told off lol. I really was hoping it wasn’t too bad or being too biased. I absolutely hate that. And I certainly don’t want to be just agreed with, I love active discussions and will have them with many people on here, but I don’t like feeling like at any moment I could be invalidated and my opinion worthless when all I did was post something I felt was accurate to my own analysis. So I’ve almost deleted that post so many times. But thankfully, y’all are not horrible... so far. 

Anyways, I for some reason go on tangents that only half make sense. Stream of consciousness and ADHD I guess. But hopefully this reply wasn’t so drastic. I absolutely love that you support the active discussion of flaws and the character’s who have them and you are more than welcome to discuss with me anytime :D As long as your okay with the fact that I write essays as opposed to simple thanks haha!

[lareinenoir]

∆Apple of my Eye∆

Loki x Female! Reader

Request: Hi, I love your work so much!! I was wondering if you could do a Loki x female reader where the reader isn’t heavy but she isn’t fit either. Where reader has been through a lot (depression, heartbreak, etc.) and when she sees another girl flirting with Loki she doesn’t have enough self-confidence to do anything about it but Loki notices and a lot of fluff happens.

@em18-blue-soccer-love

Summary: Body image is what you have struggled with for quite a while. Meeting Loki distracted you from it and his constant compliments always made you blush like crazy! When you are invited to one of Tony Stark's party and see your ex-best friend, the memories of your years in college come back. The memories weren't as fun as they are supposed to be.

A/N: I just wanna say, you are all beautiful and self-love is what I've struggled with for so long! For the past two years, I have learned that loving myself is the best thing for me. If you ever need a reminder on how "beautifully and wonderfully made" you are, hmu. ☺

Tag list: @tell-me-a-poem @thatweirdwalangpake @schizonephilim @hisparadox @empressoftheundergroundsun

"Morning precious." Says Loki kissing your head as you stretch your arms and look to the clock.

"Morning? It's noon." You yawn watching Loki toss an apple in his hand "Why didn't you wake me?"

"Well," he says walking over and kissing your head. "you look rather peaceful asleep and I couldn't bring myself to wake you."

"How charming." You replied and he passed you the apple.

"Eat, an apple a day gives the doctor away."

Bursting out you laughing you wipe the apple on the blanket and roll your eyes. "It's an apple a day keeps the doctor away' silly."

"Bah." He says waving his hand "Your Midgardian sayings are all so...let's just say they mean so many things."

"Haha." You shrug taking a bite. "Don't worry, I don't plan on visiting the doctor anytime soon. At least not because I'm sick."

"Good," he nods as he stands you up and pulled you to his body. "I don't want my precious queen getting the chills."

"You Asgardians never get sick." You say while chewing the apple. "Like...for the past two years I've known you and Thor not once have you gotten sick."

"Our immune systems aren't as weak as you mortals." He laughs and you snort

"Hey! Offensive to my people." You giggle slapping him on the shoulder as Loki lays his head in your lap. "We aren't as weak as you think, Loki. Especially women."

"Darling, men-" you give him a warning look and he gets your hint. "What I meant to say was...mortal men will never be stronger than Asgardian men."

"Whatever." You roll your eyes finishing the apple. "Speaking of men," you say, placing the apple core on the dresser "Tony invited us to his house for a little surprise party for Pepper. Do you wanna be my date?" You Giggle

"well..." He said pretending to think. "I'd have to ask the woman I'm currently with if she'd be OK with me going on a date with a very good looking woman, such as yourself."

You smirked and folded your arms as he twists a strand of your hair around his finger. "I'm sure the woman you're seeing wouldn't mind." You joke kneeling down your head to kiss his nose. "If you don't tell her I mean. It can be our little secret."

"Our little secret."

Sharing a small kiss you brush back his jet black hair just to study his face. You felt so lucky to have him.

Tony's parties. Always full of people. Men in expensive suits and Rolex watches. Woman in fitted dresses that matched there handbag. Not to mention some very hot eye candy on the arms of a woman or man.

"You've been staring at your reflection for two hours and have changed outfits seventeen times, not counting this one." Loki groaned getting frustrated and you shook your head

"You men have it easy. All you do is show up in a tux and add gel to your hair." You say heading back to the closet. "I don't...I just want to look the part."

Loki sits up in his elbows off the bed and squinted at you. "The part?" He questions

You instantly close your lips and bring out three more dresses. "So, which one. Blush? Copper red or Zesty-"

He appears in front of you with his index finger against your lips. His eyes in you he slowly takes the hangers and tosses them on the bed. "Y/N, I told you that you look ravishing in all of them. Asking me over and over again will not change my mind." You smile and he kisses the corner of your mouth. "You look good in everything."

"Aw." You say grinning like a ninny trying to avoid his eyes. You wanted to say, 'no I'm not' but you knew how much it annoyed him. "Thanks." You whisper biting your lip.

"Excellent, now can we please go? I'm afraid we are going to be rather late." Said Loki taking your hand in his.

"The party will just be getting started when we arrive." You shrug and you two share a laugh. "He'll have the drinks out by then I hope."

"You mortals and your alcoholic beverages." He said rolling his eyes. "They are a bit on the weak side."

You roll your eyes at him and pinch his butt cheek. "Shut up."

He winks at you and gives you a slap on the ass as you continue walking

When you arrive at Tony's place you are greeted by a whole lot of people bumping into you and Loki and are quickly offered a drink.

"Weren't sure you were going to show up." Said Rhodey handing you and Loki a glass of vodka. "Thor is over there with Steve and Bucky. He said our beverages aren't strong enough for a god."

"And he is indeed right." Said Loki handing it back. "I'm going to go over there, Y/N?" He sort of asks. "Will you be alright for a bit?"

"I will." You nod and he kisses your cheek. "Go on, have fun."

Watching Loki disappear in the crowd of people, you turn and see Rhodey is gone off and is dancing on some tables with Tony.

"Y/N!" Shouts Pepper and you take a sip of the drink as she wraps her arms around your neck. "Glad you could come. Having fun?"

"Yeah. You should be the one having fun! Happy birthday." You said kissing her cheek. "Sorry I couldn't be there to say 'Surprise' I think I spent more time figuring out what to wear than anything."

"No worries. You look great." She motions with her hands. "It wasn't much of a surprise anyway. Vision accidentally spilled the beans. He's still learning." Pepper shrugged "To surprises?" She raised her martini and you clinked it with hers

"Surprises." You say as you both take a large sip.

Walking around and partying with the others you catch a glimpse of Loki doing shots with Steve and Thor.

"What the heck?" You ask seeing they drew a big crowd. The countertop full of shot glasses, Tony filling them while Clint counted. "You've got to be kidding me." You laugh hearing everyone cheer.

In college, this is what the guys did at frat parties. Why the heck were they doing it. Grown men!

"Rogers wins!" Said Clint and everyone began to holler loudly. "Thirty-two shots in one minute." He announces

"I still think you won." You hear someone say as they approach Loki hands grazing his shoulder.

You stared at those perfectly manicured pink acrylic nails and held your breath when you recognized the black stilettoes.

"Thank you." Loki nods chuckling nervously

"I'm Missy Donaven" She introduces herself holding out her free hand. "You must be Loki."

"I am indeed. Its a pleasure to meet you, Missy Donovan." Said Loki being very polite.

You watched them carefully but couldn't help but stare from a distance at her perfectly shaped lips that curved into a smile. How her giggle made your skin crawl because of how lovely it was. Your heart beats with fear a bit as Missy and Loki talked. She would laugh then touch his chest.

Touching Loki! Touching Loki!

"You have a sense of humor. Pretty good looking too." She winks touching his hair.

Touching his hair! Touching his hair!

That's when she looked up and caught your eye. Quickly turning the other way you feel your feet begin to speed walk through the crowd.

"Where you going in a hurry?" Asks Natasha stopping you

Brushing past her you ignore and keep walking until you were in a bathroom. One perfect bathroom with a sink and mirror. And staring in it made you look away. Seeing Missy and how beautiful her red hair was made your body ache. You weren't as pretty as she was. You knew that. She had curves...you weren't sure if you had any. Missy had big boobs...bigger than yours.

Looking away from the mirror, you take a seat on the edge of the tub and bite your lip. Just as you took in a breath the door opens and a smiling Missy Donovan walks in.

"I knew it was you." She says closing the door. "The smell of loneliness was a dead give away."

You didn't want to fight. You weren't in the mood to exchange insults with her. It bothered you more because you should have known to lock the door.

"Where ya going? Don't you wanna talk to me? I haven't seen you in ages Y/N." She says face now in the mirror touching up her makeup.

"I-"

"You look like a Teletubbie. I'm actually surprised you came out of the house in a dress. I thought you were more of pants and oversized hoodie kinda girl. But I can't complain too much." Missy shrugs fixing her hair and making kissing faces in the mirror. "Its a step up. A lot of people thought you were a dike Y/N, because of the way you dressed. Hell, I thought you were. It's an improvement." She spins on her heels, red hair slapping you a bit in your face as she grazes her finger across your cheek. "A+ for trying I guess."

Sucking in your cheeks, you stay silent and hold in your tears. It was very hard to look at her small pale feet and know, in your mind, Loki would pick her.

"Lay off the twinkies? I think I'm seeing a quadruple chin. You definitely need to hit the gym." Missy giggle perking up her breasts. "Hopefully I get this sexy hunk of a man in bed with me. I'll be sure to text you what it's like to sleep with a god."

Back against the wall, you feel helpless and hold in your tears. You even stopped breathing. Missy never allowed you to look at her directly. She always said, "only pretty people can look at me." In college, you waited on Missy. You were at her every beck and call she made sure you knew your place.

She'd always remind you how fat you looked in clothes. The first day you met her, you wore a dress to a party. "Oh honey, you look like a bloated Turkey."

At the time it was a joke? Right? Missy didn't mean anything by it...

When Missy had planned parties, you were in charge but never invited. "I don't want you eating up all the snacks."

One time you did have the nerve to buck up when you found out she was making out with a guy you liked.

"I'm saving you, Y/N. Pedro wouldn't date someone like you. He doesn't go for the girls who look like street trash."

Pedro Hernandez, you had an Instagram spam page and Pedro followed it. He commented on one of your memes and then started DM you. You kept it from Missy for obvious reasons. You and Pedro never met, or even sent pictures to each other. Unfortunately, Missy found out that you guys were planning on meeting and pretended to be you.

"I can't believe I ever thought we were friends." You said but you were more upset with Pedro then anything. He ended up picking Missy Donaven over you.

You and Missy stopped being 'friends' You told yourself, "College all by myself is way better than having someone like Missy."

And here you are. In the bathroom tub crying your eyes out because it was happening all over again. You knew how it would end. Loki would pick Missy. And you wouldn't blame him.

There was a knock at the door and you said,

"Go away!"

"Y/N? Is that you? Are you alright?"

You said nothing. Loki was probably coming to tell you that you were breaking up. He was gonna go for Missy...

"Y/N...I'm coming in. Ok? I'm coming in."

Not looking up, you felt his body heat over you. Loki knew why you were upset. Missy let it slip that you were in the bathroom crying.

"Y/N... I do hate seeing you cry." He tells you, climbing in the tub with you.

Looking up and at the sink, you shake your head. "I saw you with her. At first, I was mad but...I understand. She's pretty. Way prettier than me. Nice big boobs. Tinier waist with a nice ass...curves that I don't have. She isn't fat like me. It's ok. I'm not mad."

"Y/N, I'm afraid-"

"Loki you deserve better. A better-looking girl than me. She's perfect for you. Missy is...she's the perfect girl in every way."

You weren't sure if he was listening or not but he lifts your chin and wipes the pad of his thumb across your cheek. "Y/N. I picked a woman." Loki was looking at you. Eyes so intently looking only at you "I picked a woman, not a girl looking for attention. You are the apple of my eye. You are perfect for me.”

He meant every word. You knew it. Now, you felt stupid for just thinking Otherwise. Loki had already picked you.

"Do you-"

You pressed your lips on his smoothly and inhaled his scent as he kissed you back. Loki held you to his body with a firm grip on the small of your back as your lips moved in sync together. You pull away and he gives you a questionable look,

“What is it, Y/N?”

“Kissing in a bathtub? That will be one hell of a memory.”

both sharing a quick laugh kisses your top lip lightly. “Then let's not ruin it then, yeah?”

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Hi! I wanted to say that I took your survey and read your post. I hope you aren't overworking yourself! You have a lot of terrific ideas and I can't wait to see what you you do with them but I don't want you to feel pressured to do everything, like rewriting With You. Just take care of yourself, okay? We love you! 💕

Thank you for taking the survey! I reassure you that I’m not overworking myself haha 

It’s not perfect, but I’ve organized myself and have an online notebook that I work on and jot down ideas for this blog and the fics. When I created that survey, I listed some of the ideas I came up with to get feedback on them. 

With the Definitive series releasing tonight, I’m going to replay the entire series, taking notes and working on my huge Clementine post.

 I’ll also do a silent livestream of it tonight [hopefully] so that I can get a feel for Mixer and whatnot, and I’ll be on here making posts about it with screenshots and thoughts. 

As for your worries about [with you], it’s okay, you don’t have to worry about me. I have wanted to go back and rework and rewrite [with you] for a long time. 

I’ve added extra scenes in the first chapters [like more interactions between Mitch and James with a certain running joke and an extra scene with Aasim and Louis] that I’ve wanted to include since the beginning but felt rushed to get the next chapter out, fixed the grammar and pacing, ect. and I feel incredibly good about it now. 

I’m excited to finish it up and finally share it with you. I’ve learned to take my time and have fun with it again, even if it’s taking a long time to finish. 

And I have some oneshots in the work thanks to the flood of prompts I was given on that second survey. 

Not only that but when I replay the entire series it always gives me that jolt of inspiration and motivation to write because it refreshes my love for these characters and story. The only time this hasn’t happened was when I did my despair route but that’s because that one upset me too much so.... yeah. 

And I still have my TBR list of fics that I’m sorting and putting into categories for my Fanfic Appreciation posts. Reading the fics, gathering my thoughts, and giving them reviews takes a lot of time as well, so I have to put aside a day for them. 

So, yeah, not everything I listed will be posted all at once haha

That’s why it was about FUTURE posts and projects for this blog. 

Anyway, thank you for your message, anon! I’m not overworked, I’m taking more breaks when I get tired, and I’m actually not feeling as much pressure as I have in the past. Since I haven’t uploaded anything to [with you] in a while, I haven’t gotten as many messages, aside from anon hate that I flat out delete without reading, so at least some good has come from dropping off the fanfic train hahaha

Again, thank you, anon! I love you guys, too! ❤️❤️❤️

[gb-patch]

Hi again, it is I, the one Who asked about dads, but without hiding anymore ;D I would indeed want to know about the sidekick characters as parents, If it's not trouble. Though mostly I would want to know about the side bfs and Romeo, If you don't want to make a really Long post haha (and maybe Lynn?) Thank you!

Okay, here’s the side characters are parents!

Kam: Ahaha, he wouldn’t be able to manage being a parent without a lot of help. He gets wiser as he gets older, but Kam is pretty much always a laid back airhead. He’d need a lot of reminders on what to do and when to do it. It wouldn’t ever harm the kid, but it would ruin the house and cause trouble with his work. He’d prioritize the kid over his job so when he inevitably gets behind it’d be with that. Things wouldn’t be that bad if his parents and partner were around. The kid(s) would be very fond of Kam when they were young. As they got older they could remain close or the kid might be embarrassed to have a parent who came across as so simple-minded. If Kam realized the kid felt that way, he’d be awfully sad. That’d probably be enough for the kid to forget what other people might think and support their dad again. Kam would be incapable of punishing the kid for doing wrong, so someone else would have to take that role. Letting Kam play ‘good cop’ while his partner was ‘bad cop’ would probably be the best way to go about it.

Adrian: Adrian would definitely be a loving parent and he’d want to spend a lot of time with his kid, listening to them and make sure he took extra good care of them but at the same time he’d probably be kind of a clueless parent because of his socializing issues.  He’d be really aware of that so he would read lots and lots of parenting books, search up anything he could find on the topic and ask everyone he knew for advice, especially his family and partner. Even if the advice was questionable, he’d still take it to heart. That would repeat whenever he was uncertain about anything.  Adrian would probably be a sort of embarrassing parent in some ways: he’d dress his kid(s) up in stylish outfits (though he’d encourage developing their own style really young), teach them to be really polite, bake them fancy decorated cakes to celebrate little things, be totally clueless about new slang since he wouldn’t finally memorize what they meant until they’re obsolete (that’s a constant throughout his life) and be like a deer in headlights at any sort of parent and/or children gathering. But he’d be so sweet, attentive and good at listening that he’d probably be a really good, though unique, parent to his child(ren) and I think they’d have a really close family relationship, even if it was a little different than the typical one.

(This answer was written by the idea bouncer/proofreader for XOD who designed Adrian’s personality)

Romeo: Romeo would be a push-over parent. When someone asks something of him, he feels compelled to do it. He just can’t help being helpful. His partner would have to come to his defense whenever the kid(s) went crazy with wants. It’d take quite a while and a lot of support for him to learn how to say ‘no’ and start telling the kids what they’re supposed to do instead of the other way around. But since he’s such a nice loving dad, the kids would probably be proud of him for standing up for himself. He’d be the type of parent who’d read stories to their kid(s) every night and give silly voices to all the characters. He’d also encourage them to find their passion and follow their dreams.

Lynn: At the beginning Lynn would instinctively treat the relationship as a nurse/patient situation. He wouldn’t really understand what the difference between being a caretaker and a true parent was. With the help of his partner and the child (as they got old enough to explain how they felt/what they wanted) Lynn would be able to develop a more personal relationship with his kid. At that point, he’d be a pretty affectionate and proud parent. Lynn would also be a relatively strict dad. Maybe a bit too strict. He’d expect the kid to behave as though they were in a boarding school rather than a home. That’s also something he could get better at over time. However, Lynn would never yell or seriously punish the kid, so his strictness wouldn’t hurt the relationship. Things would only get better between Lynn and his kid(s) over time. Lynn is much more experienced in interacting with teens/adults over young kids.

Missy: Missy honestly doesn’t want to be a parent. If she did end up pregnant it would be an accident. However, she would keep the baby. Missy would hire a live-in nanny to do all of the work that comes with parenting (cleaning, cooking, teaching, etc). Missy would interact with her kid when it came to fun things, like playing and going out together. As the kid got older Missy would attempt to foster a friend-like relationship with them. If the kid responded well to a parent who treated them like a friend the two would stick together and be close. If the kid resented Missy for not being an actual mother, Missy would give the kid the option to pick out a boarding school and be away from the family they’re not happy with. The kid may or may not accept the offer.  

Cala: She’s not going to be a parent.

Trent: He would be an overall solid dad. He would’ve started to get over his obsession with Meadow Department store before adopting a kid, so he wouldn’t be a workaholic type of parent. Trent would have some trouble as the kid got older and had more complicated feelings/problems, but he’d do what he could to give support/advice. His husband would hopefully be a little more skilled in that regard. They’d probably have some special family trip that they’d go on every year and various other pleasant traditions. Creating memories and things unique just to their family would be important to Trent. 

Thank you for the question ^^!

[blackrupee]

Wow your life sounds complicated right now I'm sorry for that. So you aren't gonna have any managers what the fuck? And OH MY GOD I hate when people come in to eat so close to close!!!! ( I work @ zaxbys) if someone is acting passive aggressive I would act even more passive aggressive- make that bitch regret it- regarding the 2 guys: 2 guys is better than no guys:))) wish the first one didn't pressure you though. How did the 2nd one hurt you? - and I care so don't worry about boring me

hi hello would you like to read a novel on my life thanks i talk too much (tldrs at end)

nah like.. we had been managing with a general manager and 3 assistant managers even though we really need 4 so as not to overwork anyone. we recently hired a new one from a corporate arbys (we’re franchised) and two just quit. like i mentioned, theyre not coming back even though the original plan was that their new jobs would be only temporary (6 weeks). sooooo now we have a general manager who only works weekday day shifts, one assistant manager who is relatively new (she had been working at this place for a while but was promoted to manager 6ish months ago) and another who is brand new but still has some experience. they said theyre looking to promote from within initially, but they might have to hire outside people if no suitable potential manager is picked. id love to get manager pay and its not like managers do anything hard so id be WILLING to be a manager..like the whole reason why i got trained on backline was because we have such a big turnover rate with backline people since it fucking SUCKS and i was wanting to be helpful and flexible. so like. thats what i offerred. but one assistant manager was like “lmao all youd do is swear at the customers” and im like bitch when have i ever?? i talk shit about them all the time but ive only sworn IN FRONT OF a customer twice and neither time was it directed at them. but i mean im sitting on a small handful of customer complaints so its not like the gm would even consider me probably. idk dude. i can be nice if you pay me to be nice. but i get paid to do food and do it fast……….so

but yeah literallyyyyyyyyy i have no idea how people can be so??? inconsiderate???? and they dont??? care??? im learning that my contant frustration with people in my personal interactions is due to a disconnect between what i value in  expectations and what actually happens. like. when i go somewhere i already KNOW what i want, so i say it quickly and competently. i preface a lot of my interactions with people im requesting food or services from with “i’m sorry but…”. i phrase things as “could i get” as opposed to “get me” or “i want” which sound HELLA rude tbh. id always have my money ready at the window or the register, im always trying to pay attention and not miss anything or just….be rude in any way bc i know fast food fucking sucks. i know some of the people i interact with probably hate their job as much as i do and i want to be the smallest burden i can be. and it seems like nearly no one else has these same values???? and i dont understand how people can just??? be? so? inconsiderate?

also yes bitch im the queen of passive aggression. literally the night before i was working a short shift and my friend was closing frontline and this bitch was closing drivethrough. i just got the okay to clock out and i was like “bye! have a beautiful night! just know that i love you so much and ive everything ive ever said has always been fake until this point! never meant anything ive ever said until now especially if your name starts with k or ends with ristin (drivethrough girl/the one whos being so difficult is named kristin) but just know that i love you!” and basically being really dramatic and extra as satire.

i guess for context the whole reason she decided to be mad at me was the other night when she was drunk and was like “do you even likeeeeeee meeee i feel like you hateeeee meeee wahh wahh wahhhh” even though im like…..yes bitch i enjoy your company? i joke/use hyperbole/satire/irony/whatever a lot but like occasionally id be like “ey yo you know its all jokes right u know i love u right” just to ensure that she knows but she fucking. ignores it all. i feel like she so desperately WANTS me to hate her and tbh i got fucking sick and tired of hearing her complain all the time about this shit! i fucking hate repeating myself! so sure. if you want me to hate you so fucking much there. i hate you. i fucking hate you so fucking much. like is that what you want to hear? is that validating? are you fucking happy?

its so fucking frustrating

but i will not be held accountable for her decision to be upset. because thats what it is. she wants to be upset, and she wants me to be responsible for it when its literally not my responsibility. i am absolutely not going to stand for this shit like i kind of want to say its emotional abuse lmaooo but im just so fucking sick of it. 

everyone knows that i take chicken tenders and turnovers that would be thrown out at the end of the night and she was closing frontline yesterday and made a point to throw out the turnovers right next to me without asking if i wanted any/leaving any for me. i mean i completely expected her to be that petty of a bitch so it was kind of funny tbhonestly. also im p sure she unfollowed me here lmaoo

with regards to the guys and this paragraph could get a bit tmi/nsfw: yeah the first one kind of sucked but i feel like a little bit of the New Person Nerves have worn down so id do better if we were to hookup again. because like i totally would love to have fucked him but…..anxiety. he was hot tho. like 10/10 body and ass holy shit. plus he complimented me on my ass eating so (assuming that was genuine and not a vapid ego boost haha paranoia am i right) hopefully he comes back for seconds. 

second guy ive had a longish history with. started talking to him at the beginning of last fall semester and we hooked up kinda regularly for about a month. things fell apart, we both understood that we wouldn’t be good dating wise but still enjoyed meaningless cuddles. whatever. it got to a point where he would only hit me up like once every month and a half or so and towards like january-ish he hits me up again. so im like nice cool lets chill. im getting ready for this but my phone is in the other room. while im doing this he drove by my place to pick me up (since he was on his way back from nashville), didnt get a response to an “im here” text (bc i was busy and tbh not expecting him to do that), and left. he lives within like walking distance tho so im like “?? sorry i was busy are you still out or should i walk over?“ and he texts me like “sorry hold up a thing just happened” and im like…….okay. so im just.. waiting around for him. periodically texting like “hey are we good for tonight and whats going on?” because like there was some drama with his friend? hes like.. apologizing and shit but this goes on for an hour. BUT. the ENTIRE time he’s dealing with this friend problem or whatever he’s literally on grindr. and at the end of this hour im like in full blown paranoia panic mode and i literally text him something mentioning this and he BLOCKS ME ON GRINDR so im like ??????!!!!??? and i text him (all while saying “not to be crazy or paranoid bc im probably coming off that way but like could i get an answer or something??”) AND HE LITERALLY SAYS HE DELETED HIS GRINDR. but thats a LIE because i have a secondary account to see like……if guys are still on grindr/if a thing with a guy might turn into something more like if i see he’s not on grindr as much?? thats prob incredibly stalkerish and probably really creepy but hey. thats me. so i KNOW he lied to me but i cant really say “hey ur a liar” without disclosing this weird creepy stalker part of me (funnily enough this isnt the first time a guy has lied to me and i caught it with my secondary account! so it proves to have some function use in the end. not totally crazy). so. yeah. that was the incident. after this i dont trust him at all, and i still dont, but i had it in my mind to like somehow get him to fall in love with me just so i could break his heart for doing this? never really worked out. so now im at the point where im like….eh he’s a piece of shit and i hate him but ill cuddle with him bc it feels good

back to nsfw/tmi: the sex was okay. he’s weird about people being near his like….dick and stuff because he was raped and i totally get it bc i was too but he was comfortable enough for me to finger him and my finger still hurts from where he clenched when he came lmaoooooo. was totally hot tho. and i got to east his ass so im like eyyyyyyyy. its been so long since ive eaten ass so having it two consecutive nights in a row has been cathartic.

tldr; we have 2 assisant managers and a gm rn. looking for more

tldr; bitch. same.

tldr; bitch. same.

tldr; he’s a liar