#Happy early dadfucker Friday

[wastemanjohn]

HAPPY DFF QUEEN!!!!! how do you think punishment/reward in john and dean's relationship evolved over the years as dean grew up and john got older?

HAPPY DFF ONE DAY EARLY and sorry it's taken me so long to answer!

tw for my answer for emotional abuse

i mean. i don't actually see john being one for big punishments in the traditional sense. i don't buy into him being overtly or consistently physically abusive, 1. because there's no canonical evidence for that and 2. because i find that interpretation kinda boring. i'm not saying dean didn't get the odd spanking or smack because john is definitely of that generation, and whilst i'm not saying that's okay i'm saying it's probably to be expected.

but i do think john probably emotionally punished dean... the way he looked at dean while hugging sam in the shtriga episode kind of haunts me tbh... i could definitely see john freezing dean out and ignoring him when he made john angry. giving him the silent treatment. giving him that shtriga-episode *look*. i feel like john wouldn't even need to say a word to dean to make him feel like shit... i see him doing a lot of passive-aggressive stuff. also throwing out casual reprimands and put-downs too. see: rust on the car - that came out of nowhere. i know some might argue that's a small thing; but especially with the way sam reacted to that i wonder if john picking at dean about random shit all the time was kind of just par for the course between them.

and i actually don't see this changing very much as dean got older. if anything it might have got worse. i think john is unstable and he's hurting, and i do think dean felt the brunt of that. the phrase "hurt people hurt people" annoys me but it's true, and it should be this family's slogan.

as for rewards... i don't know if there was much of that either. when dean succeeds in protecting sam, taking care of him while john's away, is that not *rewarding* enough in itself? is it not enough to save people, or help dad do it? i think dean got the odd squeeze on the shoulder. the odd smile, the odd "great job, kiddo." i think these things were everything to dean.

idk. the above is a narrative that explains a lot about dean for me anyway.

as for adult dean... i very much go through phases in terms of how i see their relationship, and i'm very much on my "john-is-only-tender-with-dean-during-sex" bullshit at the moment. is it out of guilt? is it out of a desire to take care of his boy, give him something that feels good when he hasn't been able to do that in pretty much every other area of dean's life? idk. but i love (word used loosely) the idea of dean seeing sex with daddy as a reward in itself. the intimacy of it. the closeness, and john granting him that.

john being in a good enough mood. dean managing not to inadvertently piss him off for long enough to sustain it.

i feel like this got really dark lol sorry. but anyway i don't think john ever set out to be purposefully cruel, and i think dean understood that to his detriment. if that makes sense.

[lovetransaction]

happy dadfucker friday <3 do you think dean looks back on his years with john fondly, or does he have some regrets? does he wish john had treated him more like a normal son, or is he thankful for what he got to share with his dad?

angel i have not answered one of these for donkey years but i am in the middle of a free banh mi that the office got us for lunch so here goes ty ty <3

(i did a relative to this answer here, so this time i'm taking a different angle)

I think Dean would spend a while being so angry that he can't think about it without feeling himself slipping off the edge, so he purposely refuses to think about it. Particularly after he got to unload his feelings about his mother and see how it actually made some sort of difference, the idea that even if he unloaded is feelings about his father it would do absolutely nothing would drive him insane.

(Lebanon would, actually, set him back even further because when confronted with John, actual alive John who smelled and sounded the same but looked older and thinner and soaked in sorrow, Dean wouldn't have the heart to be anything but grateful. BUT back to reality--)

Once Dean got to a point where everything else in his life had arrived at the same destination regarding how much it hurt him, I think he'd look at his relationship with John again. And older, he'd realize with some numb shock that being with his dad was the longest intimate relationship he'd been able to maintain in his life, with somebody who wasn't Sam. The good part would be -- by that point, who cares about taboos? He could think about being curled up in John's bed only barely on the pillow, and the way John would drag his knuckles slow back and forth along Dean's hip, and them in the Impala too early in the morning sharing two coffees and one greasy microwaved convenience store cheeseburger, and how his dad would hold his head real tight when Dean swallowed, and not have that biting sense of shame about it.

So he's thankful. Dean was never going to be a normal son. John couldn't have treated him like one. It would've been an act of contempt if he had. He's thankful.

[missmisdemeanor]

Happy dadfucker Friday! ❤ do you think john ever does romantic things for dean?

short answer, yes. (I did read so many moving parts recently so I'm all up in my feelings)

I think he makes small gestures. Driving them out somewhere with a nice view, or giving Dean a little gift here and there. Being extra affectionate on a slow morning, stuff like that. He's not a roses and teddy bears guy, but he's absolutely a waking up early to make you breakfast guy, or a swiped that cassette you won't stop hinting you want guy.

I also have a headcanon that, very rarely, probably only when he's drunk or Dean's quite upset or both, he'll tell Dean, like. "You mean so much to me. Me and your brother could've never gotten by without you. You're so amazing, Dean, really. I know I don't tell you that, but. I mean it." Dean really holds onto that stuff, and John probably forgets he even said it by the next day.

[egipci]

hiii happy dadfucker friday <3 what’s your favorite era of deanjohn? preseries, stanford era, early seasons, post-series, etc?

Happy Dadfucker Friday to you, and what a lovely question on this fine day!

As to my favorite era: I think all of these have their appeal when you're as smitten with this ship as I am. But to keep it short I'm going to say that the pre-series/pre-stanford era has been on my mind a lot lately, especially in its "pre-slash" phase.

I think I've said this before in the discord, but Dean's feelings about John postmortem always remind me of the sort of weird (self-)loathing/disgust you feel towards a (not necessarily requited/consummated) relationship with someone you were really in love with when you were young-- like, even without any abuse or exploitation, you look back at it and you kind of hate how stupidly enamored you were with the person and how vulnerable it made you and how painful it was, and how blind you were to it, even if you were introspective and self-aware as I think young Dean is. So, I guess I think a lot about what it was that he was going through (regardless of when things actually happened between them): an adolescent sexual awakening centered around the wrong person and the guilt and shame that comes with that, the asymmetrical relationship where he's really John's caregiver and the way that influences his feelings, being in love with someone who is to some degree emotionally distant and can never truly reciprocate, the very real sexual exploitation he goes through just as a matter of course in their hunting life, the melancholia of homelessness and the longing for the home you can never have, etc. etc. -- and all of that combined with the regular-people trauma of becoming a grown-up has intrigued me a lot recently.

This is to say nothing about John's end of things, which obsesses me endlessly--- but I'll leave this off here before it's no longer Friday! <3

[writethelifeyouwant]

hiii happy dadfucker friday <3 what’s your favorite era of deanjohn? preseries, stanford era, early seasons, post-series, etc?

Ahahahaha happy Dadfucker Friday 🖤

This is a hard questionnnnn I think it’s a toss up between preseries and Stanford era because of the differences that Sam’s presence and absence make to the DeanJohn dynamic. And that’s the era where John could really mould Dean into whatever he wanted him to be (e.g. the goodest boy, his perfect fuck toy) ☺️☺️ wbu? 👀

[amiwritesthings]

Ami ❤️❤️❤️ On this early Dadfucker Friday, I wanted to ask you to share your favorite line(s) from one of your fics— other than the very brilliant “a widow at twenty-seven”!

happy early dadfucker friday, em!! thank you so much for the ask!

favorite lines hhhmmmmm....

okay so, i really love these from hold me like nothing else matters

He startles when he’s ripped out of his thoughts by a hand coming to rest on the nape of his neck, fingertips running softly into the short buzz of his hair. “You doin' okay there, baby?” John’s voice is soft, quiet, in a way it rarely is anymore, the endearment rolling easily off his tongue. It makes Dean’s cheeks heat, still, after all these years or maybe again, since John uses it so sparingly now.

it is so soft and comforting and i just wanna live in moments like this.

and it's kinda cheating since i will probably never finish this but:

He burns Dean's body a day later, dog tags around his neck, the letters J.E. Winchester burning themselves into cold, pale skin like a brand with every lick of the flames. Sam thinks they may have always been there, but they are finally visible now, a final love letter to a father, partner, husband lost so long ago.

from the sam pov i started for my name engraved on my heart </3

[rottingsam]

hiii happy dadfucker friday <3 what’s your favorite era of deanjohn? preseries, stanford era, early seasons, post-series, etc?

Stanford is definitely at the top. just think, dean is so codependent and his baby brother just left him and now all he has left is dad. dad who’s always been there, the closest meat thing he’s got to a permanent in his life, he’ll follow him anywhere if that means dad just stays with him, dad is the closest thing to a home deans had since he was little. It’s the only home dean knows.

[misschinablue]

happy dadfucker friday! do you think dean found john in heaven after he died? if so, what did they do in heaven?

Hiiii Angel ♥

I kind of zoned out of the show in later seasons so I'm one of these weirdos who has never seen the finale (and I've decided I'm not going to watch it... Early seasons is where its at for me and I don't want Dean to die like that lol). So as a result this is something I have never really thought much about. And as I've not seen beyond the beginning of s14 (and don't really remember those episodes) there may be things I don't know about so if these thoughts are way off because I'm missing important canon information then apologies!

But my immediate raw thoughts right now are that John is probably living the life he always wanted with Mary and Dean showing up would be A Lot. And it would be a lot for Dean too. I wonder actually to be honest what Dean would want in this situation. He'd be much older and maybe not feel the same about his and John's relationship as he did when he was in his teens/twenties. I do think that with time and distance, just as he came to realise that John was very flawed for all the canonical reasons, he would feel differently about any sexual relationship too. Maybe ashamed of it, maybe angry about it, maybe completely unwilling to go there again because ultimately that relationship was incrediblyyyy fucked up and if he knew it/squashed it down at the time it would bite him hard on the arse later along with everything else John did. Basically, I think with an older Dean and with Mary back in the picture, who Dean also has very complicated feelings about, this relationship couldn't exist. It was of a certain time and context that wouldn't be there anymore.

And maybe for a while Dean would want them to live as a normal family, with Sam. To try to have the normal life and family that was taken away from him as a kid. But maybe it would be too weird. He knows now that Mary is not the idealised mother he grew up with in his head. Its hard to live with John as just his dad, regardless of how much he may be reluctant for him to be anything else. I think at this point he'd be happier if it was just him and Sam. Sorry if this is a bit out there or completely off haha. Just what immediately came to mind ❤

[laikuh]

hiii happy dadfucker friday <3 what’s your favorite era of deanjohn? preseries, stanford era, early seasons, post-series, etc?

Finally sitting down to answer this 😫😫😫

Okay SO honestly, I think I’m most in love with the John lives!au version of them I’ve got in my head (and em’s, china’s, and ami’s dms 😅). a John and Dean with time to work through their issues (like…a lot of time lol) and settle into some kind of life together that feels (hopefully) realistically difficult and tender in measured turns.

If anyone wants to talk to me about this haaaa I’m HAPPY TO.

Also I’m sorry I didn’t send any asks today, but I’ll do better next week, deanjohn besties 💕

[wastemanjohn]

happy dff!!! i’ve been meaning to ask this question for a few weeks but i always lose track of the days :/

anyway the question is: do you think john would have a madonna whore complex about deanna? or hell even dean? 👀

Haiii happy DFF and sorry it's taken me so long to respond to this! And oh my gosh this question is gorgeous.

I don't know if what I feel about johndeanna quite falls into the madonna/whore complex box, although maybe it's adjacent. In my iterations of johndeanna, I tend to lean in towards John being pretty gross about her. Kinda controlling. That 8 Simple Rules, creepy, overly possessive father of a teenage girl. Every man, at least every man that's not John, naturally has nefarious intentions towards Deanna. John will break noses and quite possibly legs. Get your fuckin' eyes off my daughter. Deanna, boys your age are all the same; no, I can't let you go out with that guy, even if you're home by 10. Sorry, sweetheart, but you know as well as I do that it's not safe out there.

I see John wanting to keep Deanna pretty sheltered from that side of things. He's got no problem teaching her how to behead a ghoul, but god forbid she should so much as kiss a boy. John wants to protect her from all that; keep her his sweet and innocent daughter, because he loves her that way, and god knows she's not innocent about much else. What father wouldn't want to protect his little girl, huh? Especially a single father who lost said little girl's mother so horrifically.

But... Christ, John can see why Deanna has so many boys chasing after her. Her mother did too; and from the back, out of the corner of his eye, sometimes she just... and John's been the best father, the best protector, that he possibly can. He's always done what he's needed to do to make sure some zitty horndog doesn't sully her with his dirty hands. But - John's hands aren't dirty. And he may be a good father; but he's not a saint. His girl is more beautiful every day. And if Deanna wants to get up close and personal with the birds and bees so badly - well, John can show her some things. She's safer with John; her body is safer with John. And if he can sate that curiosity of hers, make her feel good... maybe she'll stop trying to stray from him. He's already lost one of his girls. He can't lose another.

Dean, though? No madonna here... that boy's down to fuck pretty much whenever. Happy days for John.

[wastemanjohn]

coming up roses everywhere

Bingo Square Filled: Flogging

Link: AO3

Ship: Sam Winchester/John Winchester

Warnings: Underage

Rating: Explicit

Tags: Dysfunctional Family, Porn Watching, Daddy Issues, BDSM, Sexual Fantasy, Pre Stanford Era, Kink Discovery, Daddy Kink, Sir Kink, Sub Sam, Dom John, John Winchester's A+ Parenting

Word Count: 14,618

Summary: Where John wasn't planning to snoop around Sam's laptop, but his boy seems to be hiding something.

[missmisdemeanor]

happy one day late dadfucker friday! do you think Sam Finds Out pre-series, s1, after john's death, or never? ❤

omg a dadfucker friday ask? for me? 😭

sooo, it depends! if we want to keep things (relatively) canon and have a dean/john relationship that starts ~stanford era, i LOVE the idea of season one sam finding out. their family dynamic is already such a mess. and i think there's an opportunity there for sam to accidentally say something REALLY hurtful when he's fighting with dean, which i'm into. and there's this sick feeling that comes with wondering why dean is so loyal to john, if you get me?

howeverr, other people (i wish i remembered so i could tag) talked about sam finding out after death, and that hits like a truck for me too. like, imagine season two sam probing dean and trying to get him to admit he's upset that john died, and sam not even knowing his good intentions are forcing dean to talk and acknowledge all that shit, and understanding dean's grief is so complex and even conflicted grfghhhghgh i guess i'm just making an argument for every side now. in my defence, they all rot my brain. early established dean/john, i think sam finds out pre-series just because it's a long-ass time to hide it, and sam is around all the time, it's kind of bound to come out. and i'm sure that realization is a LOT for kid/teen sam to handle. it might drive a wedge between him and dean, or cause him to feel very out of control because there's nothing he can do to help dean, and that's putting aside how dean feels through all of this.

well, i suppose i'm not too into never because i see less potential for drama there 💀

[wastemanjohn]

Happy early Dadfucker Friday! I want to hear more about your favorite version of Sam J/D-related reactions! ❤️

HIIII BESTIE 😍😍😍 sorry I'm answering so late it's almost Friday now

My favourite, and peak Sam reaction, is jealousy (cliche I know but its SO GOOD) and I keep coming back to it in fic because its so fun to write about. But as much as I am here for the angry smut, I've been thinking lately that maybe its not necessarily as simple as a sexy incestuous love triangle where Sam and John both want Dean... more like Sam's attraction developing purely as an extension of Sam and John's general tension and push-pull re Dean. Maybe Sam would never think of Dean in a sexual way at all if John wasn't fucking him - and he's angry that Dean has, once again, chosen John over him. Like, if Dean was going to fuck anyone, why gross creepy old Dad and not Sam? What does John have that Sam doesn't have, and why, in Sam's mind, does Dean always choose John over Sam? Like, his desire to fuck Dean only exists because John gets to and he doesn't. I'll take angry possessive Sammy over sad pining Sammy any day ❤

[egipci]

HAPPY LATE DADFUCKER FRIDAY

What are your views on bottom!John? 👀

HAPPY LATE DADFUCKER FRIDAY (or is it early Dadfucker friday?)

Anyway, love this question! As you know, I'm super infatuated with older angry, bitter Dean/young John time-travel shenanigans (and so is Jensen Ackles apparently lol), and I think that lends itself quite easily to some bottom John action. (Do yourself a favor and go read this fic right now!)

But bottom John in the main timeline seems pretty unlikely to me. I could see Dean (or a very self-assured version of Dean) wanting to fuck his dad (because his dad is hot or because he wants him to feel good or because he's mad at him or whatever other reason you like), but I don't think that would actually happen. In fact I think for a long time John himself would be pretty hesitant to penetrate Dean out of guilt but also because he thinks it's invasive or he thinks it would injure Dean's masculinity in a way-- and he really loves Dean's masculinity, I think-- and so that renders the reverse situation impossible. The only way it would happen would have to be in something like vin's au -- But as I said, John really loves Dean, and Dean's sex and masculinity are constituent parts of Dean, and I think there are many non-penetrative ways to enjoy him as a dude with dude-parts. <3