#Here’s Some Free Advice From the Hand of Fate

[thatsbelievable]

[serpentandlily]

Lost in a Labyrinth - Azriel x Reader

Lost in a Labyrinth Part III - Azriel x Reader

Summary: Lonely and heartbroken after his near kiss with Elain, Azriel finds himself at the door to the most exclusive pleasure house in Hewn City, The Labyrinth, taking Rhysand’s cruel advice. What he expected to find was a pretty girl to warm a bed with him for a single night. But instead he finds something he never thought existed—his mate. A mate that is tangled up in something far more sinister than he could ever imagine. 

Warnings: angst angst angst 

➻❥ Part I ➻❥ Part II

───  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅  ───

Part III

and when he shall die, Take him and cut him out in little stars, And he will make the face of heaven so fine That all the world will be in love with night And pay no worship to the garish sun. - William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

───  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅  ───

The First Attempt

Poison was probably the easiest and cleanest way to kill somebody. It involved very little effort on your part, just a slip of the hand to pour the poison into their drink when they weren't looking. It usually didn't involve blood or puke unless you got one of the nastier poisons, which you never did anyways. Some of the girls were more sadistic though and well, you couldn't blame them for it. 

But while it was the simplest method of killing someone, it was probably one of the harder ones to pull off. First, faeries had very good senses, especially when it came to smell. One sniff of their drink could expose the poison in it, unless you were able to get your hands on one of the odorless ones. Those were more expensive though and Lydia and Keir certainly weren't willing to fund you guys besides your nightly rate from your clients. 

However, when you had made a trip to the apothecary in the underbelly of Hewn City, you had begrudgingly forked over the money for one of those clear, odorless poisons. There was no way anything else would get past Azriel and his shadows. 

Your heart ached in your chest as you stared at the decanter of whiskey sitting on the bar cart in your pleasure room. Azriel had been kind to you. He had offered you some mercy by buying out your nights and not returning until that fateful meeting at the party. And while he clearly liked being more dominant while bedding you, his touch had been gentle, soft. No one had ever shown you such care and here you were, plotting out his murder. 

But you simply had to do this. Freedom was only one dead body away for you. One more hit and you could finally wash your hands of this place, disappear to another court—perhaps one that would allow you to bathe in the sunlight for the rest of your days, something the citizens of Hewn City had never really experienced.

Kill Azriel.

Kill the shadowsinger and you'll be free to go. 

Those had been Keir's exact words. 

You had killed before. There was a time when your finger was covered in black lines, a new one added every time you didn't have enough money to pay the house fee or enough for food and had to borrow from Lydia. One every time you failed to perform for a client, no matter what they asked of you. But now you were down to one last mark. 

One for the Shadowsinger. 

One for Azriel. 

You let out a sigh, sitting down at your vanity to brush your hair. Azriel was due to show up any moment now. Ever since that night at the party, he had been coming by at this time every single night. He would buy out all the nights Lydia would allow him to before showing up. 

He never even made it seem like he expected sex on any given night. Sometimes the two of you would just cuddle in bed, whispering stories to each other about your lives. Sometimes he would come all tense and frustrated with whatever the High Lord had demanded of him. On those nights you would offer to give him a massage and listen to him complain about how much he hated his work. It seemed like the two of you had that in common, at the very least. 

You hadn't made any attempts yet. You told yourself it was because you were planning out the best way to kill Azriel. Poison, knives, strangling. There were a multitude of ways to do it. But you knew deep down what the true reason was. You had grown fond of the Shadowsinger. You didn't want to kill him.

But your wants and needs had never really ever agreed with each other your whole life. 

So here you were. Waiting for Azriel to come so you could poison him and be done with this Gods awful place. You wanted out of the labyrinth and unfortunately, this was the only way. 

No matter how much you liked Azriel, he was the one standing in the way of your freedom. 

You saw his shadows before him. They seeped underneath the door to your room like smoke. Your heart skipped a beat at the sight of them before pure dread washed over you. 

Kill Azriel. 

Kill him. 

A gentle knock on your door was heard before it was pushed open and the Shadowsinger stepped through the threshold, his beautiful face illuminated by the candlelight. His hazel eyes searched the room until they landed on you and you watched as they lit up ever so slightly—the most emotion he would allow himself to show.

You set your brush down and stood to face him. Azriel stalked forward and by his body language alone, you knew the sort of mood he was in. You braced yourself on the vanity behind you as he came to a halt in front of you, tilting your head up to stare at his lethal and devastatingly beautiful face. 

He didn’t speak as he grabbed your face in his hands and kissed you with a frenzy that lit your body on fire. You returned the passion, stringing your arms around his neck to pull yourself closer to him. His presence washed over you like a tempestuous storm, all encompassing. You lost yourself in it—in him. 

You had never felt so taken by someone before. But being with Azriel was just so easy. He was a breath of fresh air in this otherwise suffocating labyrinth. 

He pulled away all too soon.

You opened your eyes, heart pounding in your chest. “What was that for?”

“I missed you,” he murmured, voice hoarse. 

You smiled up at him. “You saw me last night, silly.”

“And yet still I miss you the moment I leave.” He buried his face in the crook of your neck and your hands slid into his dark hair. He exhaled a breath that kissed the sensitive skin of your throat. 

You didn’t want to say it out loud, but you felt the same way. Every second apart from Azriel felt like a lifetime. You gently raked your nails over his scalp and you felt his body loosen in your hold, finally relaxing. 

Your eyes fell on the decanter of whiskey sitting on the bar cart. So unassuming. So ordinary. But it held your freedom. You swallowed harshly as Azriel pulled away from you

“Go sit,” you said to him, nudging him in the direction of the couch. “I’ll get you something to drink.”

You watched him take a seat as you moved over to the bar cart. You picked up a whiskey glass, not even realizing how much your hands were shaking until you did so. You quickly set it back down on the cart, taking a deep breath.

You could do this.

All you had to do was just pour him a drink. Just one drink. That’s all it would take. One drink and he’d be dead within the hour. He’d be dead and your bargain with Keir would be over. You would be free. 

“I need to make a trip back to Velaris before it gets too late.” Azriel’s voice caused you to jump, almost knocking over the whole cart. “I have to give my mission report to Rhys before the day is over.” 

“You mean you haven’t gone to see the High Lord before coming here?” 

“No,” Azriel answered. “I…I just wanted to see you first.”

Your heart snapped into a million pieces in your chest. You frowned, staring at the back of his head. You could hear the hesitation in his voice—could feel how much it had taken out of him to admit that. Azriel wasn’t very forthcoming, so to blatantly confess something like that…

Fuck, you couldn’t do this. Not like this. You couldn’t kill him like a Godsdamn coward. 

You grabbed the decanter and dropped it on the floor, watching it smash into a million pieces just like your heart had. The whiskey splattered on the ground, soaking into the carpet. Azriel whipped around at the noise, eyebrows high. 

You turned red and stuttered out, “Oops. I-It slipped right out of my hand.” 

He chuckled, the sound deep and rich. You quickly looked away, your heart pounding in your chest. You had been minutes away from killing him. Tears lined your eyes as you knelt down to start picking up the glass shards. Azriel was at your side in a second, grasping your elbow and pulling you up off the ground. 

“Don’t touch it. You’ll cut yourself,” he murmured. “Let me take care of it.” 

His care, his concern, it only made you feel so much worse. You sucked in a breath of air, trying to blink away the tears.

“Hey, hey,” he whispered, grasping your face with his scarred hands. He lightly stroked your cheeks with his thumb. “What’s wrong?” 

You stared up at him, into his devastating hazel eyes. “Why are you so kind to me?” Your voice cracked, your throat hoarse as you held back your cries. “I have done nothing to earn your care.” 

“Earn my care? Angel, you don’t have to do anything to earn my care. I care for you because…because,” Azriel paused for a moment, almost like he was debating something. “Because you allow me an escape from my duties—from my incredibly lonely life. When I’m with you, I don’t think about anything else. There is nothing you need to do for me. Just allowing me to see you—to be with you—that is enough.” 

“Azriel, I….” You wanted to tell him everything. Wanted to tell him about your bargain with Keir—about the steward’s demand that you kill him. But the words wouldn’t come out of your mouth. “I just wanted to help you relax and I’ve already messed it up. I’m sorry. Let me go down to the cellar to get another bottle—”

“I don’t need alcohol to relax. I just need you, angel.” 

You were speechless. So utterly speechless. Any words you might’ve said got caught in your throat. All you could do was stare up at him—up at this beautiful male who had shown you he was nothing like the reputation that followed him around. He was gentle, kind, and so much better than anyone you’d ever met in this wretched city. He deserved so much more than this, so much more than you. 

“Okay?” Azriel said, knocking you out of your thoughts. 

You nodded your head, swallowing down your cries. 

“Okay,” you murmured back. 

Tonight you’d give him what he wanted. It was the least you could do. 

───  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅  ───

Azriel flew back to Velaris feeling lighter than he had in decades. It was probably irresponsible that he had gone to see his mate before giving his High Lord his mission report, but he had needed to see her. To feel her in his arms after the day he had in the Illyrian mountains. 

Tonight had been a blessing. She always took care of him like she knew exactly what he needed. And tonight he had just needed to hold her. She had talked him into a massage, her hands magic against his skin and muscles and then they had just laid together, talking about everything and nothing. 

He felt more rested than he would have if he had tried to go to sleep. He felt refreshed, buoyant—like he could take on anything that was thrown his way as long as he had his angel to return to. 

It was nearing six in the morning now and he knew Rhys would be awake, usually tending to Nyx while Feyre got some desperately needed rest. He landed with a small thud in front of the River House and quietly made his way inside. He paused as his shadows whispered to him that Rhys was waiting in his office—no babe in sight. 

When he opened the door to the office, Rhys was indeed waiting for him—arms crossed and his brows furrowed. Azriel quietly closed the door behind him, pulling out his report from the shadow realm and setting it on the desk in front of his High Lord. Rhys glanced down at it for a second before looking back at him. 

“Azriel,” Rhys said, “Where have you been all night? I’ve been trying to reach you but your mental shields were up.”

Azriel cleared his throat before answering. “I had a matter to attend to before I came here.” 

He kept his voice devoid of any emotion. He didn’t want anyone to find out about her yet—his angel. She was his for now. His secret, his love, his mate. 

Rhys raised an eyebrow at him, nostrils flaring. “Is this matter the reason why you smell of cheap perfume and aphrodisiacs?” 

Azriel shrugged, nonchalantly. “This matter is none of your business.” 

“Am I wrong to assume that your scent means that you’ve taken my advice?” 

A muscle in Azriel’s jaw twitched but he refrained from speaking in anger. “Everything you need to know about the mission is in that report,” he said, nodding towards the file on Rhys’s desk. “If that is all, I will take my leave.” 

Rhys frowned. “No, that is not all. Please, sit, Azriel. I’ve been meaning to talk to you.” 

Azriel begrudgingly sat in the armchair in front of Rhys’s desk. All he wanted to do was go back to his apartment and get ready to see his angel again in a few hours. He’d once again bought out all her time slots, leaving her with no clients other than himself. Meanwhile, he tried every night to convince her to leave with him, to return with him to Velaris. But something was holding her back…or perhaps she didn’t feel for him the way he did for her. 

That was a depressing thought that he frequently lingered on. 

“What is it?” Azriel asked, wanting to get this conversation over with. 

Rhys rubbed his jaw, his striking violet eyes assessing Azriel. “I’ve been meaning to apologize for the way I spoke to you on Solstice Night. I won’t lie and say I wasn’t angry when I saw you and Elain together, so ready to make your…affections known in plain sight—especially when she has yet to reject the bond with Lucien. But I shouldn’t have spoken to you the way I did.” 

Azriel tensed in his chair at the memory of that night—at the cruel words Rhys had thrown his way. But unlike before, no hurt came from the memory. No hurt, no longing, no despair. Nothing. Instead, where that hole had been in his chest before was now filled with thoughts and longing for his angel…his sweet mate. 

“It’s fine,” Azriel replied, stiffly. “You did the right thing. It would have been a political nightmare had Lucien seen us.” 

Rhys nodded. “It would’ve. Especially with how many ties he has to other courts—other courts we’re still trying to repair our reputation with. But I treated you like one of my subjects that night and not like a friend. It wasn’t just Lucien I was thinking of, but you too, Azriel. I don’t want to see you hurt if you give your all to Elain and she decides to pursue the bond further down in the line.” 

“It wasn’t your choice to make. It was mine,” Azriel can’t help but say. To his surprise, Rhys nodded his agreement.

“You're right. It is not my choice nor is it my life to live,” Rhys said. “Which is why I’ve decided to rescind my orders for you to stay away from her. I just ask that if you two do pursue something together, please use discretion—especially when Lucien is around. At least until she fully rejects the bond or tells him of her own affairs. Is that reasonable enough?” 

Azriel stood from his seat. “I appreciate the apology, Rhys. But everything else is not needed. I have no plans to pursue Elain or court her. Is that all?” 

Rhys stood as well, his jaw flexing. “So I was right, then? You were willing to throw away our relations with other courts for a female you have no interest in months later? Azriel, I can’t even speak to how irresponsible that would’ve been.” 

“Well, nothing happened. You intervened at the right moment,” Azriel said, coldly. 

Rhys studied him again. “No, that isn’t like you, Az. Something else has happened. Does this have anything to do with that female you had hanging off you in Hewn City? Don’t tell me you’ve fallen in love with a prostitute of all people now.” 

Anger striked through Azriel like lightning. 

“Watch how you speak about her,” he snarled, hands flexing. 

Rhys gaped at him with a disbelieving look. “Godsdamnit, Azriel. Are you that desperate for love that you have truly fallen for someone you’re paying to be in your company?”

“If you are truly my brother,” Azriel growled. “If you truly have my best interest in mind, then you will drop this now. I don’t need your advice or your concern.” 

“Of course I have your best interests in mind! But, Azriel, this is lunacy. I don’t know what that female has told you, but she only cares for your money. If you had any sense, you’d put a stop to this—”

Azriel lunged forward, slamming his hands on Rhys’s desk, shadows spiraling around him. 

“I said,” he snapped, bearing his teeth, his voice as cold as ice. “Watch how you speak about her.” 

Rhys’s mouth dropped open in shock and before he could say anything else, Azriel disappeared in a flurry of shadows. He needed to leave, far too tempted to rearrange Rhys’s face with his fists. So he let his shadows take him somewhere else he knew he could let off steam—the training ring.

───  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅  ───

The Second Attempt 

Azriel was laying next to you, fast asleep. Even his shadows had rescinded to the dark corners of the room, content to leave their master in your hands. The hands that were currently holding a dagger, shaking as you straddled his sleeping body. 

Why was this so hard?

You had killed plenty of males like this before. 

But as you stared down at Azriel’s beautifully peaceful face, something ached terribly in your chest. He looked so much more boyish when he slept. His dark hair tousled, his large wings relaxed, the harsh lines of his face smoothed out. 

The room was dark except for the singular candle on your nightstand, half illuminating his handsome face. He was nude from the waist up, his swirling Illyrian tattoos on display—tattoos you often traced over as the two of you laid in bed together. 

It had taken a while for Azriel to actually fall asleep in your presence. The first few times he had spent the night, you had woken up to him holding you in his arms, staring at you as though you were his entire world—like nothing else mattered in that moment but you. It had caused your heart to flutter and ache. 

But now here he was, asleep. A sign that he trusted you now. Trusted that he could sleep and not have to be vigilant. And he looked so vulnerable like this. Gentle and soft. Nowhere was the usual foreboding and threatening aura that followed him around.

So vulnerable. 

So unassuming.

So clueless that you were currently straddling him with a dagger held above your head, ready to strike. 

You blinked as you felt watchful eyes on you, freezing. His shadows had meandered out of the dark recesses of the room, slowly crawling your way—like they were giving you the opportunity to stop this yourself before they intervened.

You let out a deep breath and lowered your arms. 

Poisoning him had been a coward’s move and so was killing him in his slumber. If his shadows had any sense, they’d strangle you right here and now. You fell off of him, laying back down at his side. The shadows rescinded, the threat gone in their eyes. 

But as long as your freedom was dependent on Azriel’s life, he would always be in danger around you. No matter how much you wished to not hurt him. No matter what you felt for him. 

Azriel had to die. 

───  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅  ───

Azriel had never felt happiness like this before you. Not truly. He hadn’t even known it, hadn’t known that this was something he could feel. But here he was, his heart full and his mind at peace. There was only one thing that could make this better than it was.

He ghosted his scarred fingers over your bare back, lightly touching your soft skin. You were laying on your stomach next to him, nude except for the silk sheets pulled to your waist. 

His lips twitched as you let out a tiny noise of satisfaction at his touch, turning your head on your folded hands so you could stare up at him. 

He would never tire of staring at you—at your beautiful, serene face. Your alias made perfect sense. Serenity. That was what you made him feel. Though he felt a twinge of jealousy at the thought of how many other males might’ve felt like this around you. 

The only solace he had now was making sure that you were his from now on. He didn’t care how much money he had to spend to keep you occupied with him. So long as it meant you’d be his angel and no one else’s. 

You smiled up at him and the sight was so breathtaking, he lost his train of thought. 

“What are you thinking about?” You asked in that sweet voice that melted his ice cold heart. 

“You,” Azriel replied, honestly. 

You scrunched your nose at him, your smile growing. He trailed a finger down the slope of it, watching your eyes flutter at his soft touch. 

“That’s what you always say.”

He shrugged a shoulder. “It’s the truth.” 

“You're sweet,” you teased, making him chuckle.

“I don’t think anyone’s ever described me as sweet, Angel.”

It was your turn to shrug a shoulder. “You’re sweet to me.” 

“You’re special,” he said, so genuinely that it made your heart skip a beat. 

“Am I?” 

“Yes,” he said, brushing your hair off your back and over your shoulder. “Of course you are.” 

You closed your eyes with a hum, content as he began to trace lines down your back again. 

“Can I ask you something?” 

Your eyes flew open, brows furrowing. You gave him a small nod, curiously. 

“Do you…” he trailed off for a second, his voice lacking the sureness it had a moment ago. “Do you…feel this—this thing between us the way I do?”

“Azriel,” you warned, making his hand pause on your back. This was a topic you tried to stray away from with clients. You weren’t supposed to develop true feelings for any of them and you hadn’t. Not until…

“I know, I know,” he said quickly. “I understand your line of work. But I…I can’t help what I feel, Angel. Tell me you feel it too.” 

You frowned, a nasty feeling coiling in your gut. It should be easy to say no. But that wouldn’t be the truth, would it? No, the truth was you did feel it—that fiery energy between the two of you. Azriel was different. He didn’t feel like a client. He called you by your real name, knew personal details about your life. All things you had shared for some unknown reason. 

All you knew was that you had wanted to share those things with him so you did. You wanted Azriel in a way you’d never wanted anyone else. You wanted to know him, craved his presence when he was gone, loved being with him like this. 

The line between the two of you was so blurred, you weren’t sure it had ever existed in the first place. 

You looked back up at him, your eyes conveying the things you couldn’t yet say out loud. Because you couldn’t let yourself feel like this. 

But Azriel stared back at you, knowingly, like he could read everything you had spelled out in your mind. “You don’t have to say it, Angel. I just need to know.” 

You rolled onto your back, letting out a sigh. “Azriel, we can’t—”

“Why not?” He cut in. “Why not, Angel? If you…if you feel something for me then please, take me up on my offer. Let me take you to Velaris. You don’t even have to live with me. I can buy you your own apartment and anything you need. You’d never have to work again. I could take care of you, Angel, the way you deserve to be taken care of.” 

And what a life that would be. Free of this place, of this gods awful city. Free to live with Azriel. Free to do as you please. Free to bask under the sun, to see the stars in all their glory—no longer buried under this mountain. 

But it wasn’t possible. It was a dream and only a dream. So long as that mark was still on your finger, this was all you could offer him before he’d meet his demise. 

“Azriel, I can’t,” you murmured. “You know this.” 

“But why? Whatever reason or worry you have, tell me. I can’t stand leaving you here day and night. I can’t stand the thought of another having you.”

You rose from the bed, hiding your face from his sight so he didn’t see the tears lining your eyes. You quickly shrugged on a night gown, hugging yourself as you lingered by your dresser. 

You didn’t want to talk about this. You didn’t want to confront this head on. You couldn’t. Just like your other dreams, it would never come true for you. 

Azriel sighed, running a hand through his hair. He knew he had pushed too far but he couldn’t help it. “I’m sorry. I’ll drop it just please come back to bed.” 

You squeezed your eyes shut. You should kick him out, send him home. You should tell him to never come back even if it meant you’d be stuck in this place forever without his death on your hands. 

“Please,” he whispered. “Come back.” 

The pure desperation in his voice had you folding. You laid back down next to him, let him take you in his strong arms once again. 

───  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅  ───

The Third Attempt

It had taken at least twenty minutes for you to lug Azriel off the bed and into the chair that you dragged into the center of the room. The faebane laced sleep draught had done its part in this scheme. Azriel had been knocked out, his shadows nowhere to be seen. 

And now you were tying him to the chair with some strong rope, in knots you knew he wouldn't be able to undo. 

Another week had gone by with no attempts on his life due in part to your growing feelings for the shadowsinger. But a visit from Keir had you snapping out of whatever hold Azriel had on you. You needed to do this. You needed to kill him and put an end to this. It wasn't fair, it was never going to be fair but it had to happen.

Out of all the males you had killed, you knew this was the only one that would linger with you for the rest of your life. But it was a necessary sacrifice if it meant you could not only leave this awful city but this Labyrinth too. 

You decided you weren't going to be a coward about this. Azriel deserved to be looked in the eyes as you killed him, otherwise the shame might just eat you alive. It would be so much easier to just try and poison him again but you knew this was the only way it would get done. Maybe you could explain it to him, maybe he would understand. 

Hell, part of you was hoping he'd fight his way from the binds and end your life himself. Would that be a better outcome to this mess? 

You were still debating that.

For now you leaned against the wall, fiddling with your dagger as you waited for him to wake up. You had spent all last night making sure he was happy—content. You had given him everything. Your body, your heart, your mind. It would be your last gift to him. 

But your freedom was hanging in the air between the two of you and that far outweighed anything else. You had been lost in this labyrinth for far too long. It was time for you to finally find your way out. Unfortunately, your way out was through th—killing the one male who had made you feel things you'd never thought you would.

"A-Angel?"

Azriel's hoarse voice made you stand up straight, your gaze falling on him tied to the chair. He blinked a few times, still a bit drowsy from the draught. You watched as he slowly realized his predicament, that he was tied up and without his shadows. He yanked at the binds that had his arms held behind his back, strung up to the chair. 

"Angel," he repeated, finally catching sight of you, "What...what is this? Why...why am I tied up?" 

You stalked forward and he noticed the dagger you held in your hand. His eyes went wide with alarm and he stared up at you in disbelief. He tried to yank himself free again, making the wood of the chair groan. 

“What are you doing?”

“I didn’t want to do this,” you started with a sigh. 

Azriel stopped his struggling, raising an eyebrow at you. “Do what?”

“Kill you,” you said, bluntly. 

Azriel was silent for a moment before he burst into laughter. Your brows furrowed in confusion at his reaction. Normally this was when males started demanding you untie them or pleading for their lives depending on how much pride they had. 

“What’s so funny?” You snapped, taking a step closer to him. 

Azriel shook his head, his laughter fading. “You’re not going to kill me.” 

You frowned. “I am. I have to.” 

Azriel leaned back in the chair, his wings held out proudly. He had completely ceased his struggling, all the alarm gone from his eyes. “And pray tell, Angel, why do you have to kill me?” 

“It doesn’t matter,” you answered quickly, trying to regain your composure. “Not to you anyways.” 

“Well, seeing as I am the one about to die,” Azriel remarked, so nonchalantly, “then I think it does matter.”

He smirked at you, furthering your confusion. Why was he acting so…so calm?! You narrowed your eyes at him, closing the distance between the two of you.

“Why are you smiling?” You huffed, fisting his hair and pulling his head back to expose his throat. You pressed the dagger against his pulse point. 

“It’s cute that you think you’re in control here,” he shrugged, that smile not leaving his face. 

“I am in control here,” you snapped. “In case you haven’t noticed, you’re the one tied up!”

“Am I?” He drawled out before yanking at the binds again. “Ah, you’re right. I am.”

You stepped away from him with a sneer. “Why are you acting like this!”

“Like what, Angel?” He smirked at you again, flicking his hair out of his face. 

“Like I’m not about to kill you! Like you’re not about to die!” 

“I’m hoping we can talk this out,” Azriel shrugged. 

“There is nothing to talk about,” you growled, frustrated. You’d expected some yelling or shouts from him, maybe a few pleas thrown in but not whatever this was. 

“I beg to differ,” he replied, “seeing as I’m about to die, I’d like to know why.” 

“Because…you…I—fuck!” You turned away from him, holding the sides of your head in exasperation. You squeezed your eyes shut, Keir’s words replaying in your head on repeat. 

The smile dropped from Azriel’s face at the show of your distress. “Angel, come on. Just drop the dagger and talk to me. Whoever has put you up to this can be dealt with.” 

“You don’t understand,” you cried out. 

“Then make me understand,” Azriel pleaded. “Please.” 

“I have to kill you, Azriel,” you wept. “I have to or I’ll be stuck here forever.” 

“Stuck here? Stuck in The Labyrinth?”

“Yes!” You let out a tiny sob, still not facing him. “If I don’t….if I don’t kill you, I won’t be able to leave.” 

“Angel,” Azriel whispered, “Why would you be stuck here? If you need help leaving, I’ve already offered to get you out.” 

You whirled around to face him. “I can’t just leave, don’t you get it! I can’t just walk out of here like you. I’m trapped.”

“Trapped? Angel, please explain it to me. You’re not making any sense.”

“I was so, so stupid. So stupid, so naive,” you cried. 

“Just tell me what it is,” Azriel said, gently. “Let me help you!”

“You can’t,” you whispered, wiping away the tears streaming down your face. “You can’t help me. Not with this.” 

“Why?”

“Because I made a bargain with Keir,” you said, staring down at the dagger in your hand. “All the girls here have to do it. We get to work here, not get sold off and eventually we will be allowed to leave but…”

“Not without a price,” Azriel filled in the blanks. “So what do you owe Keir favors or something?”

You shook your head. “We��re given marks and targets. He tells us a name and we…we kill them for him.” 

“And let me guess, Keir gave you my name?”

“Yes, he did,” you sighed. “You’re supposed to be my last mark. After this…I’ll be free.”

Silence fell over the room. Silence until Azriel uttered one sentence. 

“So kill me.”

Your head shot up in surprise. “W-what?”

“Kill me,” he repeated, staring directly into your eyes. “If it means you’ll be free, if it means you can leave this place and have a life of your own…kill me.”

“Azriel,” you murmured. “I—”

Azriel yanked himself out of the binds, causing you to gasp. He gripped your arm and dragged you to him, angling the dagger right against his heart.

“Do it, Angel,” he whispered. “It’s okay. Kill me. I want you to be free. I want a better life for you. So kill me.” 

You stared at him, tears pouring down your face. Your hand was shaking as you held the dagger against his skin. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Azriel was giving you his permission, telling you to do it, to kill him. 

He kept a firm grip on your wrist, burying the dagger deeper so it pricked his skin. A small droplet of blood formed, sliding down his bare chest. “Do it, Angel, please.” 

“I-I…I can’t,” you sobbed. No matter how much you tried to convince yourself to push the dagger straight through to his heart, you couldn’t. “I can’t.” 

“Why?” Azriel asked. “Why can’t you?”

“I just…I can’t—”

“Why!” Azriel shouted, making you jump. Your hand was shaking so bad now, tears still streaming down your cheeks. “Why can’t you do it! Tell me why!”

“I don’t know,” you stuttered out through a sob. “I don’t know—”

“Yes, you do,” Azriel said, sternly. “You know why.”

You shook your head, sobbing. He pressed the dagger deeper into his skin. “Why can’t you kill me, Angel? Come on, you know. You know why.” 

He was right. 

You knew why.

You’d known all along. Since the moment you had laid eyes on him that night he came to your room. Something deep inside of you had recognized it and subconsciously buried it. But you couldn’t deny it any longer. 

“Say it,” Azriel demanded. “You know why. Say it!”

You let out a sob.

“You’re….you’re my mate.”

───  ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅  ───

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[skrrts]

here in the rain, will you smile again? (oneshot)

✧ gn!reader x jeong yunho ✧ former high school sweethearts ✧ genre: non idol, romance, sad, still in love, comfort ✧ word count: 5,4k ✧ warnings: mention of heartbreak, insecurities, painful breakup in the past, crying

Jeong Yunho was more than your high school sweetheart; he was the love of your life, although you only understood it later, regretting how the two of you let your parents force you to break up to focus on your academic future. You never believed in fate, but that day, when you crossed the street in the pouring rain and saw him: soaked, the flowers of a bouquet falling on the street as he was waiting for somebody who would not come. Maybe it always had meant to be that way because, in the end, you always knew the two of you belonged together.

a/n: so far, my one-shots for him have been very sweet and soft, so i wanted to write something different. mostly a short story of high school sweethearts reuniting because they never really stopped loving each other. (it does have a happy ending)

You looked up to the sky, the heavy grey clouds swallowed even the smallest hint of sunshine. Autumn had come quietly just like every year and before you knew it, Summer was gone, the leaves started to change their color like a sad love song that everyone knew but nobody really wanted to listen to. You were glad now that you had a diligent friend such as Seonghwa who sent you a text not to forget your umbrella this morning because he knew you would have otherwise.

The workday had been short, really. When you arrived at the office in the morning, the internet already had been off, and there really only could be so much done when your programs mainly required to be connected to the digital online network. It had been some time since you last had a free afternoon in the middle of the week but it was a good thing. Every vacation, you just pressured yourself to shove as much as possible in the one or two weeks, to feel like it was worth it but it being so unexpected, maybe it would be fun just to go with whatever came to mind.

While the rain wasn’t the most inviting condition, you were used to it. In the small town you came from, the rain was as much a local as the several hundred people living there. As memories dwelled up, you shoved them aside and stared down at your smartphone instead, thumb brushing over to scroll through a few recommendations. It was sweet, that you found this little forum where people from different parts of the city recommended their favorites a few weeks ago and now finally had an excuse to try it. You hated crowded places and it was welcoming to go somewhere you could count on to be nice.

“This looks cute,” your gaze stopped on a small café which wasn’t too far from here. If you cheated and took the crossing at the cinema, you would be there in no time. The idea of a cup of big green tea was nice right now, maybe together with a slice of cake. You worked extra hard lately, and your latest project was a big success. 

You sighed as you finally stepped ahead and through the rain, trying to dodge little puddles of rainwater. From a career perspective, everything worked out for you. Thanks to some networking during college, you snatched a job with plenty of potential right after graduation, and from there, you steadily worked yourself up, you even only had two sick days in three years at this company. 

Your private life, on the other hand, it was hard to really say it existed and that wasn’t because you lacked free time, actually, if anything your work schedule was steady, your employer one to ensure that they could market themself with an accurate work-life balance. You had friends, went to the gym twice a week and a cutea pet bunny waited for you at home because your landlord wasn’t accepting bigger pets. 

Love just never worked out for you but there was no reason to waste time searching for advice online, going to speed dating, or having your friends set you up with somebody. The reason was always so obvious to you.

You already found the love of your life once, during those cursed high school years you often still yearned back for, not because life had been easier but because he still was in it. Nobody ever could live up to him because he had been the right one for you and you always believed it had been the same for him. 

It wasn’t that you tried but somehow…

You shook your head, trying not to let your throat go dry again because your body always still reacted to it, even after seven years, it was as it could remember the feeling from that day, when you called for his name and his brother finally pulled him away because both of your parents agreed you were a distraction to each other because you wanted to go to the same college, spending every free minute side by side, leading to his parents to forcefully make him change high school for his final year.

“Tch,” you rubbed over your eyes, stopping as stupid tears dwelled on it. Why was it that love like that would not go away? Yes, this too you would not mind, you often silently prayed to your heart to release you but it would not, clinging stupidly to a hope that did not exist.

Fate did not exist.

Somebody stumbled into you, only rushing an apology and a quick bow because it led to you dropping your umbrella. You cursed a little, more so scolding yourself to be lost in those silly old memories on a free afternoon when your gaze caught a figure. 

It was difficult to say what it was, maybe the familiarity you just never shook off, maybe it was because there was so much sadness about it that your own seemed almost like nothing.

He must have been standing in the pouring rain for some time, his clothes soaking, hair clinging to his face and the bouquet of flowers started to slowly crumble to the ground, little leaves falling as it was not made to withstand the angry autumn weather. 

Your heart was beating loudly, a drumming in your ears that even the traffic sound disappeared and all you could do was … walk. Your body was already on its way, it refused for your mind to actually step in, telling it how considering he had been waiting for somebody, quite obviously a person important, this was not the moment to make it worse.

Fate said: fuck you, I exist, now have your punishment for doubting me!

When you took the last stair, your steps finally slowed and you needed a moment to make it to his side. Carefully, yet gently your hand leaned forward and then, the world around you disappeared, all that was left was that small space underneath your umbrella.

“You shouldn’t stand here like that in the rain without an umbrella,” your voice scolded him gently.

Jeong Yunho looked up when your voice reached him. 

Why was it that he was crying when he saw you?

Yunho had known, this date was a foolish idea but what could he do about it? His heart yearned to be loved and to love, to have somebody who would smile at him and allow for his embrace to gently curl around. Lazy morning in bed, holding hands while walking through the city, ignoring the dull landscape autumn brought to it every time and a smile. He wanted to see a smile that would make his heart race.

It wasn’t a fantasy he desired to make true but a memory of something he had held until he lost it because of his wrongdoing. He wasn’t able to be the son his parents wanted and so, he did what they asked of him.

What would you do when you were seventeen, madly in love but also a child who wanted to make his parents proud, who believed so much in them that surely, they knew best?

He doubted it, the moment you screamed his name, asking him not to go and how his brother pulled him back to the car. Yet, both of you had accepted it, you lowered your heads to make your families proud and in return, his heart felt empty ever since. Nobody managed to fill it because nobody was you.

No, he didn't want any love, he wanted yours. He always did because once, it had been his.

Sure, the little flirts at his workplace had been sincere from his side or he told himself so, that woman was quick to return it but maybe as she learned how Yunho had this cliche dream of a simple life with a little family of his own, she changed her mind.

He felt like a fool standing in front of the cinema with flowers, knowing already half an hour later that she would not come, but not even the rain chased him away because maybe he wanted to cling to the hope that he was good enough for somebody, that maybe all it needed was time and they would be here, take him for who he was. Maybe he did not lose all the rights with you, but then would it be fair? Because deep down he just wanted ...

So he waited. For two hours. And then, he was found.

It was as the world cleared up, the rain stopped falling and a face came into view that was as beautiful as yesterday, yet so different that he could not deny he’d have been a little shy.

You held the umbrella right above him, scolding him for standing in the pouring rain.

Yunho’s mouth opened but no words were coming out as he was staring at you, the way how you had grown up so much but there was still all of the sweetness in your features he had fallen so hard for the first time back in junior year of High School, when introduced yourself as his science partner for the year. 

The damn tears wouldn't stop now.

You never were shy to do whatever it needed to make those you loved smile, even if it likely meant hurting yourself in the process.

To make him smile in the middle of the rain in a city, after seven years apart.

“Sorry I’m late, I got I was a little distracted. Are those for me?” 

It took Yunho a moment to realize you were pointing to the flowers in his hands which now were only a sad reflection of their earlier state.

He spent twenty minutes trying to choose a pair and only now, he realized he had gotten your favorite flowers. How did not pay attention to this sooner?

The world seemed to be standing still, that moment when Yunho wondered what he was doing. He waited and waited and he never … went back to you although it was all he wanted but he was undeserving.

So why were you here like that? 

And then you stepped closer and reached out for his cheek, he froze under the touch but your hand was soft and gentle. “Don’t cry, I am sorry I am late.” 

Your voice was a soft whisper and you brushed a tear away from his cheek before taking the flowers carefully from his hands. “Mh, I guess we do not have to worry about giving them water then any time soon. Here, let’s go. Get you somewhere warm and dry.”

Your hand grabbed him and you pulled him along, inside the cinema where a few people threw glances at you, no surprise, thinking how his appearance must have looked to any of them. 

Finally, after minutes must have passed, Yunho found his voice again, although it was far from its usual self: “Y/N?” It was as he needed confirmation that this was truly you and you were here with him.

“Sh, sit! We can worry about the rest later.”

You replied and pulled the wet scarf from his neck and forced him to shrug out of his coat. His cheeks started to turn red as he watched how you took care of him, using your own scarf to ruffle his hair a little more dry, and looked over his figure.

“Why are you so reckless? Standing in the rain like that. You always get a cold so easily,” you finally sat still and looked at him.

Yunho no longer could change it, he had to reach out and cup your face and you held still like you understood he needed to do this to be sure, that you really just had come back to him.

You always came running towards him while all he was doing was waiting. 

“I guess, I was waiting for you,” he whispered and hated how his eyes got wet again, how the tears would not stop from floating. The moment your arms curled around him, he found himself burying his face against your shoulder, feeling your hands soothingly brushing over the back of his neck. 

“It’s okay, I am here now. There, no reason to worry about it. I won’t go anywhere.” 

It didn’t feel like seven years were apart this moment and the last time you held each other in your arms just like that.

Yet, the familiarity finally managed to make him relax and he whispered your name again, wanting to make sure you knew.

It was hard seeing Yunho like that, his beautiful smile absent from his handsome face. Maybe it was a stupid idea for you to act like that, to say the things you did but then, was it? Did you not just admit to yourself how you longed for him, waiting for anything even close to what the two of you once shared to come into your life? 

People were staring, they always did and you did not worry about it, let them watch how somebody had a hard day. If they knew how seven years, almost a decade of separation was between the two of you, would they still?

Yunho finally seemed to relax, his fingers now took your hands and he looked at them like it was the first time, his thumb brushing over the soft skin. There was no rush, now that the two of you sat here together, if anything rush was what you feared, the thought of him leaving pushed far into the back of your mind.

“My apartment is close by,” Yunho finally said. “If you do not mind we skip the movie, I guess you are right and I should get something dry to wear.” 

Even if he tried to hide just how nervous he was to ask you that, it was easy to tell because you knew him better than anyone else and it seemed, the love of your life did not change to much, even with seven years passing by since you last held him in your arms.

It was the tears in his eyes back in the rain that made you do this, your heart could not take it to see him like that, not after longing for the softness of his smile for so long. In that moment, all that mattered had been to stop those tears but you noticed them constantly threatening to return in the edge of his eyes.

“That seems like a good idea, let’s get you there then;” you nodded and carefully picked up the flowers again, waiting for Yunho to slip back into the wet coat but when you reached for the umbrella, he shook his head: “Let me take this one for us. You haven’t gotten very tall still, so this will be easier.”

His little joke helps you to relax and you nod: “Sounds good.”

Back in high school, the two of you often would walk like that to school, when it would not stop raining just back then you were holding hands and talking about silly nonsense. It seemed so far away now with the buzzing streets of the city, and people rushing by to be done with their day. You wondered if Yunho was thinking something similar: Did he think about all the past memories or maybe, even wish to reach out for your hand? 

You would take it without hesitation.

“There we are,” his gentle voice made you look up and you were surprised just how close it had been. There was an odd feeling in your stomach, thinking how often you walked this street to work but you never knew your high school sweetheart was living here.

At least, the guilt shrank a little when you stepped in and it was easy to see that Yunho only must have moved in recently, a dozen boxes still standing around, some halfway opened.

“It’s a little messy. I used to work at a different branch, I only came here like two months ago… I kept finding excuses to take my time with it,” he explained, likely having noticed your gaze. He placed the umbrella next to the door and stripped it out of his streetwear. You were here to ensure that he would be okay but Yunho instantly fell back into his patterns.

He always put everyone else first, especially you and he was quick to offer you some comfortable slippers, some that brought some color to his cheek because they had the shape of cute dogs. 

“Do you want something to drink? Soda, coffee, tea? I also have water, of course!” He looked at you with his big eyes and if you wouldn’t know better, he seemed nervous.

“How about I make us some tea and you change into something dry? I am sure I can find everything I need for that,” you replied, giving him a small and playful shove, ignoring that you no longer were teens but two people in their mid-20s working big jobs. 

There was a small pout on his face, followed by a sigh: “Fineee, I shall be going. See you in a minute.” You couldn’t hold back the chuckle when you watched him almost racing to what seemingly was his bedroom. 

After shrugging out of your shoes and jacket, you put up your scarf to dry before moving over to the kitchen area, putting the poor bouquet into a glass of clear water before slowly opening the cabinets which proved to be a challenge. Damn Yunho was a giant and everyday necessities were stored at a height comfortable for him, so you needed to grab a stool to reach the packages of tea. You were quite sure to hear a wardrobe often a few times too often in the bedroom, and small hisses which made you smile.

When the two of you went on your first date, it was a little like that too. His mother had told you to wait but when still wasn’t there after fifteen minutes, you sneaked upstairs to find him being lost of what to wear best to impress you. You shook your head, reminding yourself that this was different, and poured two cups of tea. 

The place felt like him, small little details were making it comfortable and warm. You sat down on the couch and allowed your gaze to wander until it got stuck on one particular photo on the wall: it was the class picture from the last yearbook before he was forced to change schools. 

“Feels like an eternity, right”? his warm voice filled the air and you met with his smile. His hair was still wet but he had changed into an oversized knitted sweater, showing a little bit of collarbone, and a fresh pair of jeans. Somehow, it made him look younger again.

“Right? I can’t believe we are supposed to have one of those class meetings next year, I really do not feel that old yet,” you casually joked back before leaning over, and offering him the other cup of tea: “There you go, you need to warm up, even with dry clothes.” 

He made a face but listened, sitting down next to you. When you saw he wasn’t even wearing socks, you sighed because there were many memories of small summer colds because Yunho just was so reckless.

“You really are something, Jeong Yunho!” Your arm reached over and you grabbed a blanket, starting to wrap him up until you were satisfied he looked warm and comfortable.

“I’m fine, I promise,” he replied, muttering into the tea. It seemed neither of you really wanted to ask or talk about how exactly he had ended up in the rain like that. Instead, you sat down on the couch next to him, turning around to cross your legs and sipping on your own tea. It was not really hard to see he had so many questions, and so did you.

“My workplace is really nearby, our internet went off today and I suddenly found myself with a free afternoon;” you started, just to offer him anything.

“Maybe it’s time for a cat, you know? I am going towards my thirties now, being a single cat owner is almost mandatory to me but the firm who owns my complex says no. I got a bunny instead, do you want to see a photo?” 

It was so easy just to chat with Yunho, and tell him everything and nothing important. Your mind just settled with a habit you forgot you once had and you leaned over to show him the photo of the white fuzzy loop bunny. “This is Fluffs, yes I named him so because he just has too much fur but he is very patient when it comes to brushing.”

Yunho looked up, giving you a silly smile: “Right, so much to your talent of naming things.” You both laughed together and he was looking at the photos you showed him but all so often, you could feel his gaze on your face.

Did you mention being single on purpose? Yes, because you did not want to waste time on those things when instead, you would selfishly just take anything he’d give to you, ignoring that every day eventually had an end.

“I think, those were all,” you nodded and kept your phone in your hands, hesitant before offering it to him, looking away.

“You know… if you give me your number, I could send you photos of him here and then?”

Now you finally really blushed and you could see how Yunho seemed happy about it. He bowed and took the phone, saving his number before offering it back: “I am waiting patiently for updates.” 

It was when your fingers touched again and for a moment, the two of you held in and looked at each other. The cups both rested on the small couch table at this point and allowed for Yunho to be just a little daring because he was leaning closer, the blanket slipping off his shoulder. And then, his big hands rested on your face, one gently cupping your chin as your eyes met.

Words would be hard right now, there was no way to describe the sorrow of separation, the years of yearning and looking for something only one other person could give you. Regret would be wasted because there was no way to bring back what was lost but maybe, there was something true about the saying how one still had this very moment.

If this had been a movie, viewers would be disappointed now, because there was no kiss, no deep devotion of love. Yunho allowed his forehead to rest against yours, his arms finally curled around your body and he pulled you closer. His face was properly buried against his neck and you could feel the tears against your skin, the way his body tensed, and then, the small soft sobs that escaped him. 

You did not know why Yunho was in so much sorrow. Of course, your heartbreak had been intense too, you did not even go to prom on your graduation because all you could think was how he was not there. And in every important event of your life since, when couples embraced, your coworkers were picked up by their spouse, you thought of him.

Yeah, you really were a pitiful thing because how could you think of him every time but you never managed to get yourself out there looking? Times had been there, once, when you met his brother but he would not tell you anything other than Yunho was doing fine… and you just left it like that. 

“Hey there, look at me,” you finally very slowly moved after letting him cry for some time, now you captured his face: “It’s okay.”

But you could read it off his face: “It’s my fault. If not for me being so careless, we never would have broken up and I’d not … you’d not have to cry so much.”

You were relieved that he was not withdrawing but only looked away: “I was… stupid. I thought, that so many people had done it before so why not us? I meant to wait until we had graduated…But my mom found it and then she just lost it. My parents wouldn’t listen when I told them it was not like that, how it did not mean I planned not going to college, just that we wanted to go together and how I’d not see why not…”

Yunho seemed not to hold it back much longer but only a few things made sense. You could remember that day, in the morning everything had been perfect until you two came back from a small summer trip. His and your parents sitting together, then telling you how the relationship they supported for two years suddenly was no longer acceptable, how it would affect your grades and future, so they would no longer allow for it.

The way you both begged them, saying it wasn’t true and how you would surely go to college, do all of those things but they would not have it, Yunho’s parents already signed him into another high school.

“What do you mean?” you carefully asked, thumb brushing over his cheek.

“I brought a ring, from the money I made at the Summer job. I knew it would be the last chance to save up before college. I wanted to propose to you when we would have graduated, I knew how dumb I was back then but I just knew that you should be the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. When my mother found the ring by accident… she misunderstood it.”

Your mouth formed a small "Oh" because suddenly, it made sense. Yunho’s parents were kind people, but they always would do what they thought was best for their son and finally, you understood. Yunho must have blamed himself for all of this in the past seven years. The thought pained you greatly.

“Oh Yunho, we were barely seventeen and our parents had all of those great hopes and dreams for how the lives of their children should be. This is not your fault,” you pulled him into another hug and his tall form clung to you.

This was not his fault and suddenly, you came to accept nor was it yours. Yes, you could have looked for him but back then, there was nothing you could have done in that very moment, except to be reckless but this would not have been who you fell in love with. You two were in love but always caring for your families, like most kids.

For a moment, you hesitated and it was a foolish question but it blurred out before you knew it: “Do you still have it…?”

He knew exactly what you were talking about and moved back a little, his arm rubbing over his eyes in an attempt to get rid of the tears.

Yunho stood up slowly, moving to one of the boxes before he opened it. You remembered that silly shoe box he pulled out, covered in stickers and polaroids you took together. His fingers were gentle when he revealed a small satin box and walked back over to you.

There was a moment of hesitation before he opened it to show you the ring. It was delicate but simple, just a small silver band with yours and his name craved in and likely room for a date for the day of the proposal. It really suited him but also you because you never liked bulky or lavish details in jewelry. 

“It’s beautiful,” you whispered and he looked at you. Yunho swallowed before he moved to sit a little closer to you again. His beautiful hands were almost a little shaking when he lifted your left hand, waiting for a moment to see if you’d pull back but when you did not, the ring slipped on your finger and even after all those years, it was a perfect fit.

“It was always meant for you, so you should have it,” he whispered. This time, you were the one to shift, moving towards him and placing yourself onto his lap. 

“Yunho, you know I always waited for you, right? Even if I was so foolish this once not to rush towards you… nobody ever could fill that spot you left, it’s like it was always yours, just waiting for you to come back to it.”

The metal of the ring was cool against his skin when he reached out for this hand and placed kisses on it.

“You were the only one who ever really belonged to me.” 

The two of you were searching for something, but it was easy to find in each other’s eyes. “Then this time, let’s make sure it doesn’t stay empty,” you whispered. “I promise if you are late, I will come, running right towards you. Leave it to me, you won’t ever feel alone again.” 

Yunho looked at you before he pulled you into a hug: “You won’t have to run towards me again because now that you are back where you belong, I promise I won’t ever let go again.” You nuzzled your head against his shoulder and sighed in relief.

For a while, he just pulled the blanket over your figures, now feeling an awful lot exhausted. This was not how you imagined this day to turn out to be but it was perfect just like that. There was no reason to speak anymore, the comfort was given just by each other’s company and eventually, the two of you relaxed, laying down on the couch, Yunho holding you tightly in his arms as you closed your eyes and drifted off.

It looked like he fell asleep a little after you. Yunho stirred, his neck a little stiff from the uncomfortable couch. The moment he reached out for you and the spot was empty, his eyes widened and he sat up, mind split between barely awake and fear. 

He still could hear the fall of rain outside, splattered the windows but it had gotten dark, nightfall had come and only left small traces of light from the street lamps. Your phone wasn’t there either. Yunho panicked, he almost fell off the couch.

“Y/N?!”

The way he called out for you was a mix of fear and maybe more desperate than he wanted to admit. The idea of losing you again, he could not bear it. There was no way he could do this again and as his bare feet walked over the cool wooden flooring, rushing towards the front door, a wave of light blinded him, coming from his bedroom.

“Yunho? I’m sorry, my boss called me, she wouldn’t stop. I told her, I have to take a sick day tomorrow 'cause I got into the rain… hey, what’s up?”

He reached out for you right away, hugging you tightly: “Just a bad dream, I thought you were gone.”

It was barely a whisper but you understood him right away.

Just as you always did. 

“Not going anywhere anymore,” you placed a gentle kiss on his cheek before taking his hand, taking a step back, and pulling him towards the bedroom.

“And where to? We have so much to do you, you know? Meet your colleagues, and then you meet mine. Take cute photos, try cake! Lots of cake! Decide what place we like best.”

Yunho blinked as he fell onto his bed with you. This was much more comfortable and he pulled you close, placing kisses over your shoulder before resting his chin on top of your head.

“Cake and places?” he asked before leaning back to look you in the eyes.

You had this incredibly cute and confident grin on your lips and now that he thought of it, it was more sexy than adorable. You had become such an incredible person and he could not wait to spend the rest of his life with you. To have the person he loved the most by his side again while also learning all about what was new.

Nothing would separate you again. 

“Well, we have been engaged for eight years now, yes? I think, it’s about time we do the thing!”

Yunho blushed as he looked at you and your features softened but the two of you knew it was true.

Because, the two of you always belonged to each other, been each others', and even with so many years apart, it never would change just that.

“I love you,” he whispered, and his heart jumped when you said those words he longed to hear again for so long back right away.

Without hesitation.

You were together

The drum of rain gently fell against the window. Autumn had come. 

But maybe with the right person by your side, it always could be summer.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Overtime 6

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such noncon/dubcon, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: your boss, Mr. Hansen, runs you ragged but you find solace in an unexpected friend.

Characters: Lloyd Hansen, Jake Jensen.

Author’s Note: This one is dedicated to my dearest @thezombieprostitute

Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself💜

You enter Mr. Hansen’s office and he’s not far behind. The slam of the door makes you jump. You whip around to face him as he storms in, brushing past you so roughly that you teeter on your feet. You’re happy you didn’t go all in and buy those heels. 

“You wanna waste me time, Critter? Huh?” He snarls as he turns and slams a fist on his desk. He winces and pulls back, shaking out his fingers. 

“No, sir, I wasn’t--” 

“You were. Look, you wanna flirt, do it on your own time. I don’t pay you to make eyes at the dweeb,” he growls. “But it’s sure as shit my damn money that got you the new gear, isn’t it?” 

“Sir, he was--” 

“Not very fucking subtle, is it? A red dress. Might as well sew a scarlet fucking letter on,” he searches around furiously and grabs something you can’t see. “How about I help you out?” 

He charges at you with a pair of scissors and you squeal. For a minute, you foresee your own murder. The gleam in his eyes assures you of your fate but he doesn’t plunge the blades into your chest. 

He grabs your skirt as he bends and snips into the fabric. You yelp and he tosses the scissors to his feet. He clutches and tears across, rending the skirt at your mid-thigh. You try to pull away but only help his destruction. He snaps the last thread and stands, whipping it at your face. 

“Show a little leg, Critter, no use in being fucking shy,” he kicks the scissors and stomps away. “Hello, now you got a little shawl to keep you warm, don’t you?” 

“Sir, I’m sorry, I... it’s just a dress.” 

“Every time I walk out of this office, I see you with the fuckhead. Just a fucking dress. You’ve been dressing like a paper bag for two years and suddenly you’re sweeping in here dressed like a goddamn cherry. You think I’m fucking stupid?" He sneers and drops into his chair. 

You stare at him as you clasp onto the strip of fabric. You look down slowly and push your legs together. You’re horrified at how much skin is on show. 

“I have to go home and change,” you utter. 

“No, you’re going to stay here and do your fucking work,” he snaps as he lifts his feet onto his desk, his chair creaking loudly. “And if that dipshit comes around you tell him to go fuck himself.” 

You blink and look at him again. You don’t understand why he’s so upset. You thought, stupidly, that he would be impressed. He always insulted your clothes and you finally took his advice. You sniff and nod. 

“Yes, sir.” 

You turn and walk to the door. The dress is ruined but you can return the rest. He clears his throat. 

“Pick up the fucking scissors,” he snarls. “You know better than to leave a mess.” 

You recoil from the door and cross to the scissors, open in the corner of the room. You bend and pick them up, not realising until you feel the air between your thighs, how short the dress really is now. You stand up sharply and scurry over to put the scissors back in their place. 

Hansen watches you, a stitch between his brows as he steeples his hands. You retreat and try to shake away his gaze. You shut the door quietly and brace yourself. You sigh as you find yourself alone. You’re not sure you could tell Jensen to go away after all of that. 

You go to your desk and sit. You tuck away the remnants of your skirt in your bag. You push your shoulders back and wake up your computer. The smell of cinnamon tickles your nose. You look down at the muffin. It doesn’t feel right now, not after Mr. Hansen ruined all the rest. 

You shove it aside and forget about it. You keep your eyes glued to the screen between getting up to print or mark the board or run off on another errand. You don’t let yourself stray from anything beyond Mr. Hansen’s demands. 

‘Coffee.’ The singular order pops up in the corner of your screen. 

You stand at once and snatch up your purse. The chance to get free of the stolid tension is enough to have you moving at double speed. You skip the elevator and take the stairs instead. You don’t take a single moment to look ahead before you dive out into the city street. 

A sheet of rain crashes down on you. Of course. Too late. You're already soaked. 

You find your beaten-up car and swing yourself into the driver seat. Frig. You’re completely drenched. Oh, and your umbrella is at your desk from the last time it rained. You sigh and try to ignore the damp clinging of fabric. 

You patiently pull out into the crawl of noontime jam. You can’t get close enough to Esther’s to avoid another slake of rain. You run inside and wait patiently for Hansen’s coffee. You ask for a double cup to keep it warm. You shield the lid as you hurry back through the downpour. 

Your spot at the office is filled as you pulled up. You park further away and bemoan another venture out into the elements. Today can’t get any worse. 

You have the coffee. That’s all that matters. You get out and sprint across the street. This time you take the elevator as your soles are too slippery to stay on the tile. 

Several looks ping off of your disheveled appearance. You ignore them like you always do. You get off on your floor and surpass your desk without missing a beat. You knock on Hansen’s door. He grunts for you to come in. He’s expecting you. He’s waiting and no matter how quick you are, it’s not fast enough. 

You stop short with a squeak of your flats as you enter. You’re unprepared for the full flash of Hansen’s bare chest. Your eyes round and you hold up the cup. You can’t breathe as you try not to stare at the thick hair across taut muscles. 

“Coffee,” you cough out and rush over to set it on the coaster.  

He casually pulls out a black polo and holds it up, “what do ya think, Critter? This make the bitch wish she’d never left me?” 

You blink and look at the wall, “um, yes, sir. I guess--” 

He isn't as mad as before. That alone puts you on edge.

“Woah, what the fuck happened to you?” He lowers the shirt, once more showing his buff torso. 

“It’s raining, sir,” you shrug, “I’ll just go dry off...” you look down at the moisture around your shoes, “and get a mop.” 

You turn with another wet squeak and he chuckles. You ignore him as you head for the door. 

“White panties and a red dress?” He clucks, “tacky.” 

You trip and stop as you feel the back of your skirt. The water has the fabric stuck to your skin and you didn’t notice in the chaos how it rode up. You pull it down and apologise under your breath as you flee. 

You should just stop hoping things won’t get worse and just expect it. 

[wolfofcelestia]

One of my last reblogs got me thinking about this so here is

How all four Zaynes + Sylus would treat you for low iron

Warnings: mentions of hunting, blood, suspicious food and drink. Everything aside from Doctor Zayne's section is not rooted in reality so don't take this as medical advice. If you feel tired all the time, go ask your doctor about it and get a blood test. Trust me, you're not supposed to be tired all the time.

Doctor Zayne

By the book treatments. You'll get iron pills and recommendations for iron-rich foods. If your stomach can't handle the pills, he might recommend iron infusions, all supervised by medical personnel. On his free nights, he'd take you out to dinner or cook for you to make sure you eat iron-rich foods, even if it's only in his presence

Dawnbreaker

He'd repeatedly remind you to rely on him. Just stay in bed, he'll take care of the rest

In his world, everything you need to live is packaged in nutrient drinks or in pills, so he'd gather all these less than tasty nutrient drinks and pills but he'd also go to the outskirts of town, where the wild animals have taken over a part of a forest. They don't entirely live in harmony with the wanderers there. Some say they're no longer animals, but meat is meat, and only fresh meat will do for his beloved, especially when she's sick

He'd come home with freshly butchered meat, and the blood from the meat in large bottles, hoping she'd be able to get some benefit from drinking such a valuable and rare fluid

Foreseer

He wouldn't treat you. You don't belong in the tower. You'll only get sicker here.

"Go back to your people. Only they can help you. I have no means or the experience to cure you here."

But you won't leave. Stubborn, even in the face of an illness that makes you weaker and weaker by the day. But you've experienced this before. It's nothing new

Soon, you and Jas annoy him enough to convince him wild game is actually high in iron and, with his powers, he'd easily be able to hunt one near the tower

It would be his first meal with someone. A warm, hearty meal with the girl he's seen his other selves eat with so many times before

Master of Fate

"Close your eyes and hold my hands. Imagine my energy flowing out of my body, crossing over our hands like a bridge, and being absorbed into your body. Take as much as you need."

The Master of Fate is also a master of ancient energy magic, so something like mana or energy transfer would be easy for him if you're ill or need a boost

This won't fix the cause of your low energy of course, but this would be a start to get you on your feet

Once you have enough energy to travel down the mountain, he'd bring you to a healer, someone who works with and sells all sorts of dried herbs and Chinese medicines

Protest all you want but these bitter, smelly concoctions are going into your mouth one way or another. He'd laugh at your reaction and call you a child for making a fuss about taking your medicine, and he'd promise you a sugary treat if you take it like a good girl

Sylus

"Are you ignoring Zayne's advice again? You're really putting him through his paces, huh? I'd have my own personal doctor take a look at you but I have a feeling you'd listen to him even less. Well, if it's iron you need, then tonight we'll have steak. And we'll have steak for as many nights as you like after that. I'll have the chef work on a meal plan with you."

With your steak dinners, he'd offer you a particular red wine. It tastes a little sharper, a little richer... The way he watches so carefully when you take a drink, and the way he smiles at you when you swallow... You'd be suspicious about it, if it weren't for the fact that you did in fact feel much better after each meal

[dyns33]

In the stars and the Book

So people wanted a new Dream of the Endless story for today. I hope you will like it !

It was rare for Destiny to give advice.

For several good reasons, which his family understood well, even if they were sometimes annoyed or disappointed that he did not break the rules to help them in difficult times.

His interventions were never really his doing, but permitted by his Book, if not obligatory.

More than any other member of the Endless, Destiny was fully and entirely his function. He loved his siblings though.

He always showed a small, almost imperceptible smile when he had the opportunity to help his family, who always listened attentively.

This time, Dream was the lucky one who received a call from Destiny's gallery.

Of course he was going to answer, it was part of his responsibilities. He'd had some problems since the Magnus had captured him, freed himself, gotten his tools back, rebuilt his kingdom, and ever since he'd felt a little empty.

His brother's call could be excellent news, or the start of new troubles. But he was going to answer anyway.

As always, Destiny greeted him quickly, not leaving his book and not clearly answering his questions. This was not what was supposed to happen.

Then, when Dream was calmer, he finally looked at him.

“Y/N.”

"The witch ? What about her ?"

“You will know happiness, true happiness, until your end, after she gives you a kiss.”

Morpheus remained stoic as he knew how to do so well, despite the storm that was brewing within him. The people of the Dreaming must have been totally panicked, even if they were used to their creator being quite upset after an encounter with any Endless other than Death.

“Goodbye, little brother.” was the last thing Destiny said, already turning his back on him, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

His relationship with Y/N ​​had always been complicated. They had almost killed each other the first time they spoke. A real disaster. But she was still young, while he had yet to learn patience and empathy.

No doubt he was also too romantic, since he no longer even remembered the reason for their argument, but only her eyes full of passion, her hand on his cheek when she had the audacity to slap him, her perfume when she had vanished into thin air, vowing never to see him again.

They had seen each other again, several times, without ever doing it on purpose, as if fate was doing everything for them to end up together.

Over time, their exchanges had become more cordial, almost friendly. Dream had to recognize that Lucienne, Hob, his sister, many people had helped him a lot to realize the value of this little witch, who had also helped him on many occasions.

Yet he never thought he would feel love for Y/N. Admiration, affection, a need to protect her, but love ? Dream had often been in love. At least he thought he was.

It was true that each of his relationships had ended like shooting stars, passing very quickly, before burning and disappearing into nothingness.

His big brother had just revealed to him the secret of a certain, infinite happiness, a happiness that he seemed to deserve against all expectations, he who had ended up thinking that he was made to remain alone. There was no reason to hesitate.

Y/N clearly had some hesitations.

Despite his many advances, he still didn't seem to know that it was not proper for mortals to appear in a living room uninvited or unannounced.

First misstep, because it was not by scaring his sweetheart that he was going to succeed in seducing her. The poor thing even asked him what she had done, convinced that he was coming to punish her.

“I’m not here for ill reasons.” he tried to reassure her. "I needed to see you. It's been a long time, I forgot how beautiful you were, χαρα μου."

"… Is everything okay ? You need a spell and you're hoping it'll be for free ? You know, I heard what happened to you. It's not pity at all, but maybe I can lower my prices for you this time."

"Your concern touches me. But I don't need anything except you. I think we could be happy together."

"Wow. Okay, you're dying."

He was going to have to use all his wooing skills to get her to kiss him.

Certainly he could have kissed her, here, right away, but his brother had been clear. It was she who had to give him this liberating kiss.

Even though Dream was now sure of his feelings, Y/N probably needed a little more time. She hadn't received Destiny's advice.

Despite all his many improvements since his release, patience had never been Dream's strong point. Yet he was literally the expectation, the hope, all the ideas, the stories, the fantasies of humanity. Not getting the promised happiness right away shouldn't have bothered him so much.

Plus, beginnings were always the most exciting part. Observe Y/N responding positively to his advances, his compliments, his gifts. However, she remained suspicious, expecting a game or a disguised exchange of good behavior.

The witch set traps for him, to reveal his true intentions. The master of nightmares found this charming and amusing at first. Then Morpheus was a little hurt and exasperated that she didn't seem as infatuated with him as he was with her.

"… You say you love me ?"

"Indeed."

"Since when ? The last time we parted, I stole several of your books and you threatened to hang me. Fortunately your librarian likes me. I returned the books to her by the way. I don't t think we can be together, we'll end up tearing each other's heads off."

"It has to happen though. Destiny said we were meant to be together."

"… What ?"

The news did not please the little witch at all. She was making fun of him, but she wasn't necessarily having a bad time. Their arguments had become like a form of dance, a nuptial ritual.

Why did he always have to ruin everything ? He, the prince of stories, really had a problem with his choice of words.

He tried to hold her back, explaining that what his brother said had to happen, it wasn't his fault.

Seeing the tears in her eyes silenced him. The last thing he wanted to be hurt her, this vision pierced his heart.

"I can't believe I could be so stupid."

"You don't understand… We can be happy, together. Love each other."

"No. I loved you. And I thought maybe you loved me too, finally. But you're here out of obligation, like always. I never want to see you again ! I'm serious this time !"

There was no spell in the world that could hide a being thinking of Dream of the Endless. Those who thought always ended up dreaming, entering his kingdom.

Yet he left her sleep in peace, the rare times Y/N closed her eyes, trembling every night at the idea of ​​finding him in her dreams.

He wondered if she was right. If he only chased after her because his brother had put him on this path, and not by choice. By feeling. It was true that he hadn't asked himself the question before Destiny called him, and he had rushed straight to the front of his happiness.

Now that he was fully taking the time to think about it, knowing that the witch had loved him in silence all this time, that he had hurt her, that she deserved better than that, he thought that he had undoubtedly always loved her more than the others.

He loved her so much that he kept his distance, because everyone he wanted ended up leaving him, suffering, or dying. And he didn't want that for her, never for her. His tender Y/N, brave, intelligent, lively little witch. Who treated him normally, standing up to him without fear, making him see his missteps.

A whole week passed, before he showed up at her place, this time knocking on the door and waiting for it to open.

He raised his hand in a peace sign as soon as their eyes met, making no move to try and enter.

"χαρα μου… I'm sorry. For my behavior, and for my presence here, when you clearly expressed your hatred for me. But I owed you this apology, and as punishment, I agree not to see you again. Thus, I condemn myself to never knowing happiness, which I do not deserve after all. My brother did not say that you could not be happy with another. Just know that I loved every moment spent with you, and I will cherish them until the end. If it wasn't happiness, it looked like it."

"… Is this a ruse to get me to fall under your spell again ?"

"No. I still find it hard to believe that you could have loved a being such as myself. I don't think I would have ever imagined it, even in my wildest creations. My brother must have known, he who knows all."

"Hob says you're a sweet fool, full of pride, but with just as much kindness, fear and humanity deep down."

“I will have to think about visiting my dear friend very soon.” Dream said while keeping a stoic face.

This made Y/N laugh. Her magnificent laugh, accompanied by a smile that she gave him too rarely. He would populate the nights of many dreamers tonight.

But for now, Morpheus wondered if he was awake, seeing her continue to smile at him, placing her hand on his cheek. They had never touched each other like this, not once, since their first meeting.

"Don't sulk, it wasn't a criticism. I knew I could only love you when he assured me that you weren't as terrible as you showed yourself. A facade, necessary because of your status."

“I’m not sulking, I’m not…”

The kiss was quick. Morpheus would remember it until his sister took the whole universe with her. Those lips on his. All this love, for him, all this time, contained in a simple kiss.

He remained as still as a marble statue, which made her smile again. Then Y/N kissed him on the cheek this time, whispering that they could go to the New Inn for a drink, before closing the door.

"… Boss ?"

“Yes Matthew ?”

"You've been here for three hours, people on the street are starting to notice you. Are you going to stay long ?"

“Until my love came out and we went to the New Inn for a drink.”

"Yeah, I don't know if your brother helped you or not, but if the witch finds it cute and not creepy, that will be proof that you two are indeed meant to be together."

Y/N found this both creepy and adorable. The poor raven returned to the Dreaming with a sigh to announce the great news, although the bright sky was not unwelcome.

It was very often a magnificent weather in the future, and until the end.

[sky-kiss]

Dad!Phael: Dog Days

A/N: I'm committing a dark and terrible sin. But I had a mighty need. Kids name is Orin because...my Durge has issues. I dunno. Have some horrible trash.

___________________

Raphael: When You Create a Mini You, But You Kinda Suck

___________________

The little terror will not stop hounding him.

Raphael massages his temple, his right hand still folded over his belly. His daughter stands before his desk, hands folded neatly at the small of her back. In a rare twist of fate, she is the very picture of courtly etiquette. The shouts echoing down the halls have made it clear that this is no happenstance occurrence: the princess, unflappable and secure in the deference afforded her position, had harassed her mother's maidservants until they'd relented. Her dark hair is neatly braided, tied with strands of precious metal. Her dress is polite and clean. She is perfectly still. 

A lie. A very convincing lie, but Raphael is not in the habit of indulging naughty children. The cambion leans back in his seat. "You've brought me a proposal, I see?" 

"Yes." Little Orin holds her head high, delicate and lovely, well-spoken, as any of his spawn ought to be. She is nearly five, and while he is delighted to be free of her nonsensical chattering, eloquence has brought a new slew of problems. Namely, understanding. He can understand her. And she is never silent. 

He hums, flicking his attention to the neatly stacked sheets of paper on his deck. "These here?" 

"Yes, father." His heir shifts. She wants to rock back on her heels so badly. The stillness drives her mad. "For you to…" Orin frowns, brow furrowing as she searches for the word. The devil will not help her. She scowls, grasping for something near enough to express her meaning, "Look."

Another hum. The archdevil plucks the topmost piece of her manuscript from the pile. Raphael thumbs the entirety of her little manifesto across the desk. The crux of each remains unchanged—artwork (childish and borderline unrecognizable) accompanied by a stretch of mangled penmanship. 

He didn't need to look at it. The little beast has made her desire entirely plain. 

The debtors do not interest her. She is too young to frequent the dungeons. 

She desires a pet to accompany her through the House. More precisely, she wants a hound. Raphael purses his lips, eyeing her artwork again. It resembles a hound in the loosest sense.

"My dear…"

Her face screws up in irritation. Orin opens her mouth to speak, only to snap it shut. He watches her wrestle herself under control. She inhales through her nose, stiffening. "But…" she nods towards the papers. "Wrote it. Mother said…"

"Ah, yes. Your mother." Raphael stands, moving around the desk and crossing to his heir. A lovely little thing, eyes bright and wide and hopeful. He remains the center of her world, the fixed point where she hangs all her dreams. He holds the proposal out to her. "Do it again. More effort this time." He hears the duchess's voice in his head: five. She's five, Raphael. He shunts her advice to the back of his awareness, kneeling in front of the girl. "Convince me, dear one. Now, begone with you." 

She snatches the papers back. To her credit, she maintains her composure until she's past the boudoir's threshold. After that, Raphael hears her grumbling (loudly) to herself. Good girl.

_________

He rejects the second proposal. 

And the third. 

The fourth is passable, but the girl looks so positively self-righteous, so purely livid, that he sends her away on principle. On the fifth attempt, Orin sends her mother. 

He's delighted by the underhandedness and the cunning. He is less enthused by his consort's sudden appearance and temper. 

On the seventh attempt, he accepts his daughter's petition. 

___________

He summons the kennel master the following day, intent on selecting a pup from the litter—a dignified creature suited to her more delicate frame. The Archduke of Avernus weaves through the little creatures and watches them tumble and scrap among themselves. 

Some have the makings of great hunters. The hound master has brought one bitch from Mephistopheles' stock, already twice the size of the average pup. He suspects (though he cannot confirm) that one of the unlittered pups has Nessian stock somewhere in its bloodline, darker than the average hound. The two hounds bully their way through their smaller kin, not a hint of grace in their forms, brutish and lacking refinement. 

They do not interest him. Raphael's attention flicks to a little bitch near the edge of the commotion. She remains seated throughout it all, fur midnight dark, head held high. She holds his gaze, unflinching—an elegant creature of immaculate breeding. She will be Leonine. His huntress! Well-suited for the little princess! 

Orin inhales sharply. She is here at her mother's behest, sworn to act on her most courtly manners. The she-devil nearly vibrates out of her skin. Her attention is fixed on the massive brutes. Orin looks up at him with desperate eyes. "Father…"

And the kennel master must know because he clucks his tongue and applauds the 'little lady.' Raphael feels a dawning horror settle over him like a shroud as the fiend scoops the largest pup from the group. He deposits him at the princess' feet. 

No, he will not have one of Mephistopheles' experiments roaming his halls. He will not.

"No." The archdevil holds his head high, setting a hand on his prodigy's shoulder. Muscles flex beneath his touch. Orin doesn't move towards the pup, but she does curl her fingers in an invitation, grinning when it presses its head into her palm. Her expression drips with savage vindication. Raphael blames her mother. "The little one. The female, there. She is more suited." 

"She's so small," Orin grumbles. 

"As are you, pet."

"I want this one." She indicates the brute. It stares up at him in dumb wonderment. 

"And the little lady does have impeccable taste, Master. If I could…" Raphael fixes the fiend with a look so full of hate that it recoils, hands held up for peace. "Aye, you know your business." 

Raphael makes the mistake of kneeling. The hounds turn as one, hungry for the attention of one they instinctively recognize as Master. Orin is delighted. "Your presence here was conditional, princess. You recall this?" She nods, attention flicking between him and the hounds. "And whose word is law?" 

"Yours." 

"Yes, mine. Clever girl" 

He sees the gears in her head turning, looking for a way out. It delights and rankles. This little creature can only toddle after and adore him, but here she is already looking for a foothold in the great game. Orin purses her lips, and he sees so much of himself in the expression. Strange. She speaks slowly, positioning the massive pup between them. 

"I love him." 

"Irrelevant. Do try again." 

She rolls her eyes. And that is the duchess, irreverent, insufferable creature. "You," she indicates her sire, "Love her?" 

"I have selected her." 

"And the House is big? So why not…" she shrugs, looking down. "Both? One for Father. One of Orin. And then they won't be alone. They shouldn't be alone, papa."

Raphael frowns. The thrice damned kennel master says, "The Lil lady ain't wrong, ser. They're pack creatures." 

"I will send you to the pits if you do not keep silent, servant." He looks between the girl and the hound (now cradled in her arms). Raphael feels himself being manipulated. He pinches the bridge of his nose. "Very well." 

"What about mother?" 

He scowls, eyes narrowing. "What of her?" 

"If we both have a hound," she stares at him with her hopeful eyes, her adoration, and her damned obvious self-satisfaction. "Won't she be hurt? Left out?"

And, oh, he has created a wretched creature. His spawn smiles. 

She gets her damned hound. And the rest of the litter for good measure, damn her. 

[elminx]

Energy Update: Lunar Eclipse 9/17/24

Note: all dates and times are in EDT

We are fast approaching our lunar eclipse, which will occur at 10:45PM on Tuesday, 9/17, at 25° Pisces. This eclipse is an off-element eclipse, which means that although our lunar nodes are still on the Aries-Libra axis, this eclipse will occur while the Sun is in Virgo and the Moon is in Pisces.

We are nearing the end of this lunar cycle (the nodes switch over to the Pisces-Virgo axis in January), and this eclipse can be viewed as a preview of the next cycle.

Pisces-Virgo (the North Node is always listed first) is a 12-6 cycle, with our North Node focused on Piscean matters and our South Node pointing away from Virgoic matters. Both Pisces and Virgo have a shared interest in serving humanity - Virgo serves humanity in the physical realm, and Pisces serves humanity in the spiritual realm. As the North node turns towards Pisces, we cross the cosmic line between sign number 1 (Aries) backward into sign number 12 (Pisces).

In a way, this first early Pisces lunar eclipse may seem like a de-evolution, but it's an important part of the process. This entire year (and 2025 as well) is one of transition. We are in the in-between, the liminal if you will. Many of us are being forced to walk forward in the unknown, but others are hanging back and clinging to what was.

Astrology is, at its most base form, a study of the cycles of life. We all know that winter follows autumn and eventually leads into spring. Likewise, monumental changes (like a worldwide pandemic) have a ripple effect that slowly morphs the world. There is no going backward. We all need to adapt. This cycle began in January 2020 when most of our planets (except for Neptune and Uranus) all met up in Capricorn simultaneously.

We have gone through the physical side of things (Taurus), and we were forced to face ourselves and what it meant for each of us individually as people (Aries). Now, we all need to deal with the spiritual side of how it impacted us (Pisces).

Pisces can be a really wise sign, but it can also be highly immature. The 12th sign in the zodiac can be seen as an amagym of all the wisdom of the signs that have come before it. Alternatively, it can also be the purest seed of a child yet to be born at dawn in Aries. Expect this lunation to bring up some major birthing pains or death pains, depending on your outlook and stage of life.

Standard eclipse advice applies: Eclipse season carries with it wild card energy but it is often referred to as the hand of fate reaching into our lives. At times, it can seem like anything is possible during and between our eclipse pairs, but a wise astrology student knows what comes and goes during the eclipse is meant to be. Eclipses don't so much erase what has come before; they tend to realign us with where we are supposed to be.

I think this is what people find the most unsettling about eclipses. Our Western culture has a pretty iffy opinion about fate and free choice. I want to be clear here that astrology does not take away your personal choice or control your life; it is merely a guideline that shows - with a high deal of accuracy - how your life will likely play out.

The first place one would look in a natal birth chart to determine this is (you guessed it) the lunar nodes. Each of us was born under particular nodal energy, symbolized by one of the six astrological Sun sign pairs. How much any individual eclipse cycle will affect you will be determined in part by your lunar nodal pairs and how the current eclipse cycle interacts with your natal chart.

Allowing for a 5° orb, we can say that next Tuesday's eclipse will affect the following groups of people in order of significance:

Anyone with a planet at 25° in a mutable sign (Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius, Pisces) firstly or any sign secondly

Anyone with a personal planet from 20-29° Pisces or Virgo (Conjunction and Opposition)

Anyone with a personal planet from 20-29° Gemini or Sagittarius (square)

Anyone with a personal planet from 20-29° Taurus, Cancer, Scorpio, Capricorn, and Pisces (trine and sextile)

Anyone with the lunar nodes on the Virgo/Pisces axis

Anyone with the Sun or Moon in Virgo or Pisces

Anyone with a personal planet, Jupiter, or Saturn between 20-29° in any sign

I want to reiterate here that eclipses do not have to have negative or harmful effects. Some eclipses visit us as great epiphanies about what we should do with our lives.

Eclipses seem to rock our worlds when we are holding on to something we are not meant to be anymore. Because we are all imperfect, stupid, fragile, egoic humans (affectionate), this happens far more often than we would like to admit.

If it happens to you, it's okay. Surviving these moments is a part of living our stupid human lives. Astrology is a huge cosmic sign in the sky saying: sometimes it isn't you. Sometimes you couldn't have done any better. Sometimes everything sucks, and it's okay to not be okay. Part of being human is getting knocked down, crying over the spilled milk until you can't cry anymore, and then getting the fuck back up again.

Life hasn't been fair to us. Like all of us. Collectively. Every single human that has been living on this planet had a fucking sucky four years.

This is a watery eclipse, and it's going to bring some serious 12th house unconscious shit. That's what a Pisces moon is made to do.

You are probably going to cry over it even if you do it in the shower so that the sound is and nobody hears you. As your friendly neighborhood astrologer, let me tell you: it's okay not to be okay.

Those of you who are afraid of the darkness may have a really hard time. That's okay, too. If that's you, do your best and maybe lie low early next week. Practice your best self-care often and early.

For those of you who live here, have planets in Pisces or the 12th house, or are drawn to working with and in the shadows, if you have the bandwidth, now is the time to pay attention.

This crossover point between Pisces and Aries will be very important next year (much like the cross-over from Capricorn to Aquarius featured heavily in the energy of 2024). In January, the North Node will move from Aries to Pisces. In March, Neptune will move from Pisces to Aries. In October, retrograde Neptune moves from Aries into Pisces.

I've already discussed the starting/stopping/backtracking/starting/stopping pattern we've been in all year.

The easiest way forward is to allow the 12th house of Pisces to show you what you need to see. It's as simple as that. (ironic)

Oh yeah, it's a Pisces full moon, so you should clean your house.

Wash, wash, wash it all away.

Do you like my work? Kofi

[ascendanttarot]

PAC: Reassuring Messages From The Universe

Hi everyone! I have a feeling some people may need a pick-me-up at the moment hence why I made this reading. I think this may be my longest reading so far! There will be signs listed before to ensure the message is for you. If you resonate with one or more signs, that is meant to be your reading. At the end, each pile will also have a quote and channelled song to listen to that resonates with your reading. The specific lyrics that I heard are listed below the title. :)

Please remember your fate is not set in stone so your answers may change depending on the actions you take and will take if you please. Tarot is not a substitute for professional advice. The images I’ve used are not mine.

From left to right, Pile 1, 2 & 3.

Pile 1

Signs:

You may be a Lana Del Rey fan, or at least have one of her songs be your one of your favourite songs

You may be really creative. Specifically, I see most of you here are artists because I just saw an image of someone’s hand covered in paint like a make-shift palette to find the right colour, or someone wiping away excess paint on their skin

You may be left-handed. To be honest, this kind of relates back to the art thing because I just heard someone swearing because their pencil sketches were smudged by their hand again lol

You are a ride-or-die friend. I’m not picking up any signs that the people who picked this pile could be ‘low maintenance friends’ because all I could feel was a loyal and passionate heart, particularly towards their friends

Okay this is an odd message but some of you here are DEHYDRATED, like you’re not even thirsty anymore this is beyond that. Please drink some water if you haven’t at all today

Back to music here, but do some of you spend hours making playlists? I just saw someone using a lot of their free time to curate playlists. I even saw some of you here like making playlists for specific people

Another weird message here but I just smelled crayons, so I’m interpreting this in a few different ways: you may be connected to your inner child, or you may work with children/have plans to work with children, or you would like to be a parent/are a parent

Your Cards: The Emperor, Knight of Cups rx, Page of Wands rx, Justice rx, The Star, 10 of Pentacles

Your Reading:

Okay, the first thing I heard while looking at these cards were the words, “Lost time” and I think that sums up half of your reading quite well.

The cards show that at the beginning of this particular situation, you felt like you were fully in your power. A very Mars-dominant energy to be in, or an Aries energy to be in wherein you felt like you could take on anything. It’s like this was a time when your confidence was at an all-time high about yourself, but also about something. For most of you, this ‘something’ was a project. For some of you, this could be a relationship. The point is, this was something in your life you felt was given to you like you’ve waited for this and finally you’ve got it, but that hope didn’t last.

As we moved on, I felt heavy feelings of frustration. Like you were ready to spring into action but something or someone else was telling you to wait, like they were stringing you along. At the back of your mind, you knew you were being taken advantage of, but you decided to stick with it anyway. I just heard, “It’s worth it.” So maybe this was something you wanted for so long that you felt like you had to stick to it because you couldn’t see how another opportunity could be better than this. I’m really sensing this was a career move for some of you here. Maybe some of you were promised a promotion but you didn’t get it. Maybe some of you were given false hope by a higher-up that this project idea of yours would be taken seriously, but you just had to wait for the right time.

And these people kept giving you excuses. If this were a relationship, I could sense that maybe this was someone who you thought would be ready to fully commit to a relationship, but they never ended up being mature enough to make that decision. It could even be a platonic relationship, and this person wanted you and them to be more casual friends, but you were ready to be a ride-or-die as I’ve stated in the signs above. The overwhelming feeling here is that you got the shorter end of the stick.

But, of course, this doesn’t last. The universe is trying to tell you that if you were broken down before and were able to build yourself back up again, then you can do that now. For most of you, I feel you’ve already left this situation and are worried that this was a mistake, and that you shouldn’t have left in the first place, but the cards are saying otherwise.

Your hope was burned out because of what you’ve gone through. You’ve sacrificed your hope and your sense of self, but the next chapter of your life won’t ask you to do that anymore. If anything, this new chapter will nurture all of those traits you have always felt were intrinsically part of who you are.

If this were a relationship, you’d probably take a break from dating for a while, but your friendships will be a cornucopia of love and support, with new and old friends alike. If this was a job or project, a new opportunity will not only cause success, but stable success. The universe is giving you the new direction you need. “One door closes so the other one opens.”

Thank you for letting me be your reader, Pile 1!

Your Channelled Song: Let The Light In by Lana Del Rey and Father John Misty

“Put the Beatles on, light the candles, go back to bed”

“Put the TV on and the flowers in a vase, lie your head”

“Ooh, let the light in

At your back door yelling 'cause I wanna come in

Ooh, turn your light on

Look at us, you and me back at it again”

Pile 2

Signs:

You may be a blunt and direct person, and you may have even gotten in trouble for this in the past. Really, I could sense you’re just a BS detector. I also saw someone rolling their eyes and saying “C’mon, talk to me straight I’ve got things to do!” haha!

I just heard ‘homebody’, so I feel like plenty of introverts have picked this pile!

You may be the sarcastic, unintentionally funny friend. If you know you know. But to specify I saw someone in a group setting saying something like “I hate half of the people in this room/I didn’t want to go—I got dragged here by my friends, please don’t talk to me” and someone laughing because they didn’t think you were serious (You were)

You’ve got a dry/witty sense of humour when you do try to make a joke intentionally, but either no one gets it, or it may be a touch too dark for their taste (Nothing problematic though!)

I got tempted to swear so many times writing out these signs so you may swear a lot. Like sometimes, if you’re in a professional environment you may find it difficult to filter out your words because of how automatic it is for you

I also feel like you’re really articulate. The first word I actually thought to describe your humour was ‘sardonic’ and I wasn’t even sure what that word meant so I can guarantee you that did not come from my mind (Yes, I had to Google the meaning)

For astrological signs, you may have Scorpio and/or Virgo in your chart. Possibly a stellium. With how active your mind is coming through in this reading and how much communication is highlighted in this section, I would not be surprised if your dominant planet is Mercury, or if you have many aspects involving that planet in your chart

Your Cards: The Hermit rx, 2 of Cups, 5 of Swords, 2 of Swords rx, King of Wands

Your Reading: Pile 2, please don’t get mad, but when I opened up to your energy, I was expecting a different message than what I delivered right now. I was ready to get serious, to go into deep waters and dive face first. But when I saw the cards… I may or may not have audibly giggled.

Not in a bad way! Hear me out before you scroll, I promise I’m saying this with the same fondness as a best friend, but pile 2, I know you’ve been in hermit mode for a while and are very comfortable staying there, but the universe isn’t really going to let that slide. For most of you, I could see you not wanting to go out but being pushed to do so by a friend. For some of you, you’ve even been convinced by some of your close friends to go on blind dates or new places to meet people in general, and you go but you really don’t want to.

The message here is clear: You’re going to meet someone new. For most of you, this will be a romantic partnership. For my aromantic folks or my readers who are simply not at all interested in romance, this will be a platonic relationship. Whatever this is, I could specifically see one person here coming out of nowhere and earnestly offering you love or friendship with respectful persistence, you wouldn’t even know what to do with them at first. I think a lot of you here have closed yourself off, not to your pre-existing close relationships, but to new people. This person is going to test that wall you’ve built around yourself and despite how much you try to intimidate them, they are not going away. Think of someone with ‘golden retriever’ vibes, which is funny because as I was tapping into your energy I got ‘black cat’ vibes from you. (I just heard, “The Arthur to my Merlin” and “The Gwen to my Morgana” whether platonically or romantically doesn’t matter, but wow, do I have some Merlin fans/old Merlin viewers in this pile)

In all seriousness though, I don’t think you have this boundary up for no reason. I’m seeing a very specific message of someone in the past that you used to trust no longer being in your life because they’ve done you wrong. This could possibly even be a betrayal of trust? Like you told them a secret, but they shared it with one person, and it quickly spread through word-of-mouth. The severing of that relationship was as fast as the betrayal done by the other person.

This made you more guarded towards newer people in your life. But also, I could see this even had a domino effect making you wary of new experiences and environments too because you’re scared you’ll meet a new person that way.  The universe is saying this past relationship has clouded your judgment and will cloud your judgment when you meet this new person. What you don’t realise is that this person could actually be good for you if you take a chance. Some of you may be worried about co-dependency. The universe is actually saying that a relationship like this will actually make you more independent, and this is because this person is emotionally mature enough to actually commit. They’ll give, you’ll take. You’ll give, they’ll take. It feels like two people who genuinely see each other as equals, and therefore respect each other as such. Their commitment and genuine belief in you will make you a more confident person in the future, but more importantly, you’ll be bolder in your choices in life. You’ll grow to have a brave heart that other people will appreciate in you, and that you’ll appreciate in yourself. “Fortune favours the bold.”

Thank you for letting me be your reader, Pile 2!

Your Channelled Song: King and Lionheart by Of Monsters and Men

“We won’t run, and we won’t run, and we won’t run”

“I’ll be here to hold your hand”

“'Cause you're my king and I'm your lionheart”

Pile 3

Signs:

Your sun sign may be an earth sign or an air sign. I also feel like some people who picked this pile may be a Leo rising or have a Leo Midheaven, but more on the Leo rising actually

I feel like some of you here may have curly hair

You may be a part of the LGBTQIA+ community

You prefer winter palettes over lighter and pastel colours for your clothes. I’m not getting a specific style but the colours here are striking. Either an all-black outfit but with the same shade of black making you appear more put together, or someone wearing jewel-toned colours like emerald green or a very striking purple

You may like wearing statement pieces. I saw this image of you in someone else’s point of view, admiring a watch you always wear or commenting on how they know you’ve just been in the room because they smelled your perfume. Picture this, someone walks into an office and just says, “Was pile 3 here—actually, you don’t need to answer that I know they were here.” And the other person who doesn’t know you getting really confused so they clarify by saying, “Oh, I know they were here because they’re the only one in this building that wears (insert fragrance here)”

Some of you here may have a ritual of listening to music in the morning while you’re getting ready to hype yourself up. All genres are coming up right now, (No, seriously. It went from Gangsta’s Paradise to successful by Ariana Grande songs to It's a Long Way to the Top (If You Wanna Rock 'N' Roll)) but what unifies these songs together is that it’s there to put you in a good mood in the morning

You may be interested in working for yourself by either starting a new business or working your way to the top. Highly ambitious energy coming from this pile, but in all the best ways possible; it makes your energy infectious. Yes. That word specifically. Just a really great energy to be around

Your Cards: 5 of Wands, 3 of Pentacles, 8 of Swords, High Priestess, The Star (clarified by 3 of Cups)

Your Reading:

Okay, I want to preface this reading by saying that this pile feels similar to pile 1. You may not have had the same circumstances, but the arc is similar, so if you are attracted to pile 1, feel free to read it as a supplementary reading after this.

There’s a very clear energy here that you may have had a falling out with people in your life. This could be a group of co-workers, friends, or even family members. There was chaos surrounding your previous situation and you felt like people were constantly at each other’s throats. If it was not as aggressive as this, it is possible that at the very least you were in an environment you did not feel safe. I think these people showed their true colours, so to speak, and it made you realise how you shouldn’t have trusted certain individuals involved. The thing is though, I can feel you being an outsider in this situation. Like from the start of all of this, you made it clear to everyone you did not want to get involved. I literally just heard, “Get over yourself.” from this pile, so maybe some of you here may even feel that people were blowing up a whole pile of nothing, and/or that they all needed to act more maturely about the situation. I also feel like one person may have taken something personally when they shouldn’t and that could’ve made you particularly frustrated because you felt this person missed the point completely.

I could see that you tried providing counsel to try to smooth things out, but no one listened. This was your last straw. You left or will leave this situation and the universe applauds you for doing so. I think a lot of people in this situation had a victim complex. This is not a judgment on them, it’s simply a message that they have a lot of unhealed wounds they need to work on. You didn’t stand by this though, and this led to you making your boundaries clear and cutting yourself off completely. For some of you, this may be a temporary situation (I heard, “Fix this or don’t bother coming back.”) but for most of you, this may be a temporary step away from these people.

The universe saw that you trusted your gut and left and are rewarding you as such. I think you have a logical mind and are not used to making decisions intuitively, but this all happened because you did what felt right, and this show of trust is going to lead to positive effects.

For the people who picked this pile, I’m getting a strong message that your intuition is a muscle, and that’s true for most people but it’s especially true for yourself. I think you’ll be asked to make more quick decisions in the next phase of your life, Some decisions have larger consequences than others, but most will be small and trivial decisions such as, “Which café should I visit today?”. Before you might’ve picked the familiar or logical option, but now you’re allowing more spontaneity in your life, and this may even surprise you a little bit. I just heard one of your friends saying, “But you always go there!” and seeing you shrug before saying, “Well, I’m in the mood to try something new.”

This will reward you with a new sense of self. The 3 of cups traditionally has a more social meaning, like friends who see each other as equals coming together to celebrate, but for you, I could see this as different sides of yourself finally living in harmony with one another. With all of that stress gone, you’ll finally have the chance to recognise how deeply complex and interesting you are, and you’ll do so with an acceptance you may have not known you needed. “To know myself is to love myself.”

Thank you for letting me be your reader, Pile 3!

Your Channelled Song: “New Person, Same Old Mistakes” by Tame Impala

“I can just hear them now

"How could you let us down?"”

“Two sides of me can't agree”

“Feel like a brand new person… I don’t care I’m in love”

[laxmiree]

[CN] MLQC Lucien’s The Sea No Longer Distant MQ translation (Part 1/3)

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for a MQ that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

[Warning]: The content of this MQ is pretty explicit and may not be suitable for individuals under the age of 18 (CN server). It is recommended that those who do not meet this age requirement refrain from proceeding beyond this point.

Translation under the cut!

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

[Notes from Lux: Special thanks to @ivioivioivi for checking some lines of the translation! Personally, translating this date is a hell of a struggle for me and I wouldn’t able to finish it without her help lol-

Before we start, I’d recommend you all read Fantasy Book Date, Devotion Date, Distant Similarity, and Monochrome Scenery. This MQ specifically references these dates/shares a similar theme so, if you haven’t read it or just want to jog your memory, please check them out first! :>

Currently, I haven't made the subtitled video, so for now here’s the CN video link if anyone wants to follow along his voice acting.]

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

—[Part 1]—

Host: ... And now, we are about to unveil the final award of the evening at the Magnolia Awards - the Best Variety Show.

As thunderous applause erupts, I find myself holding my breath, my heart pounding in my chest.

The "Best Director" award I just received feels heavy in my hands as if it's also waiting for another trophy of equal weight to be embraced.

Host: ...Now, let's take a look at the nominated works for this year's Best Variety Show.

The first nominee, produced by my company, appears on the big screen, a montage of past highlights flashing by.

After the five short films are shown in sequence, the award presenter opens the envelope in her hand.

Presenter: And the winner of the Magnolia Award for Best Variety Show is...

Her final words unleash a thunderous wave of applause, and the dazzling lights make it nearly impossible for me to keep my eyes open, leaving me in a daze.

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

The ceaseless traffic flows by like a stream, and it is not until a vaguely familiar building appears in the distance that I slowly come back to my senses.

I blink, and the white building becomes clearer as I focus on it, standing out with a sense of tranquility in the fading twilight.

….Unbeknownst to myself, I find myself subconsciously drawn to the vicinity of the research institute.

I can't help but sign, feeling a pang of annoyance as I become aware of my own emotions.

MC: I really do want to talk with Lucien after all…

Am I hoping for his comfort? Or seeking his advice?

Perhaps I just want to see him at this moment.

MC: He is probably still busy…

At 7 in the evening, the world slows its pace with the fading twilight on the horizon. The rhythmic flashing of the red traffic light at the crosswalk spreads the last remnants of twilight.

And in that small, illuminated scene, I see a familiar figure.

He gazes steadily ahead, his eyes appearing to hold a multitude of things, yet also seeming to contain nothing.

His face bears traces of exhaustion, and he seems distant and unreal as if he were merely a figment of my imagination.

But in a twist of fate, his vacant gaze shifts in the next second and meets mine.

After a moment of stunned silence, I see him smile gently.

The green light stops flashing at the last second, and I see Lucien standing in front of me.

Lucien: [chuckles] Good evening, MC.

MC: [smiles softly] Good evening, Professor Lucien, I didn't expect to meet you here.

I can't help but smile, and naturally take his hand as we walk towards home.

Lucien: I want to leave work early today.

Lucien: Meeting you proves that this was the right choice.

His voice gently accompanies the evening breeze, and I inexplicably feel that Lucien's mood doesn't seem particularly good either.

Considering his recent state of intense overtime, perhaps he's been dealt with some setbacks or failures.

I swallow the words that are about to spill out of my mouth. I purse my lips and start talking to him about amusing things I haven't shared yet, and listen to him talk about the bickering among his assistants.

Such a rare leisurely stroll, sharing everyday life we've missed with each other, everything is so good.

Lucien: By the way, I forgot to congratulate you on winning the awards.

Suddenly, I hear Lucien's voice.

Lucien: I received your message this morning, but I had some unexpected situations this afternoon, so I didn't have time to watch the live awards ceremony.

Lucien: Having won all the major awards for both "Best Director" and "Best Program" in two variety shows, for such an amazing Miss Producer, I should have congratulated you much earlier.

His tone is so brisk and firmly assured* that I'm momentarily stunned, letting it fall heavily to the ground.

Lucien is also stunned.

The air around me turns stiff, and I don't know how to describe my feelings.

The wave that's directly crashing over me now feels far more immense and intangible than the moment the guest announced it, causing both pain and sadness.

I clench my palms and instinctively muster a smile at him.

After all, if I were to cry pitifully now, it would only make me appear weak and humiliated.

MC: Hehe, I'll accept half of Professor Lucien's congratulations first! Winning Best Director is a small victory, right?

MC: I still need to keep working hard!

I can't even bring myself to look into his eyes and just want to keep walking forward.

Just as I'm about to walk away, he holds my hand to stop me, and when I turn around, I see his deep gaze filled with guilt and comfort.

Lucien: [guiltily] Sorry, it was my mistake for not confirming.

Lucien: [in a comforting tone] Don't worry, you've already done a great job. Awards are just one way of judging, and they can't determine everything.

Lucien: If you feel sad, tell me all about your feelings.

The night falls, and the streetlights stretch his shadow long.

Lucien: It's okay, you can always slow down your growth in front of me.

I look at the person in front of me, take a deep breath, and hold his hand back.

MC: I know, I am moving forward at my own pace.

MC: If I didn't do well, I'll just find a solution.

MC: Please don't worry Professor Lucien, I know what I need to do. I will keep working hard.

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[T/N: Before we move on to the next part, I want to say that this time I won't write an essay because I think the date itself explains its plot theme pretty well, I'll just use T/N to highlight some important parts and more ;)

MC uses the word 笃定 (dǔ dìng) to describe Lucien's tone (and also gaze, which will be used in part 2). I translated it to 'firm assuredness'. This word often describes how certain and unwavering a person is about something or a specific belief. In this context, Lucien is confident that MC will always be the ‘best’ and can achieve any goal she sets. However, this may also imply a kind of ‘expectation’, which is where the ‘problem’ of this date arises.]

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

—[Exclusive Radio - Resignation Application]—

[door knocking sounds]

Lucien: Come in.

Zeng Shu: Long time no see, sorry to bother you.

Lucien: Is there a problem with the project's progress?

Zeng Shu: No, the project is going very smoothly. The results from the last few trials have been very stable.

Zeng Shu: The reason I came to see you today... is to discuss a personal matter with you.

Lucien: Oh? Please go ahead.

Zeng Shu: I want to withdraw from the project.

Lucien: …

Zeng Shu: Ah, don't worry. I will complete all the handover tasks before I leave.

Zeng Shu: The project is very stable in all aspects now. Although the manpower is not abundant, having one less person won't be a problem.

Zeng Shu: Thank you for giving me the opportunity to join the project. I'm sorry I won't be able to work with everyone to see it through to completion.

Lucien: …

Zeng Shu: …

Lucien: Is there a specific reason for this?

Lucien: Although we're not in a critical period, personnel turnover will inevitably have an impact on the project.

Lucien: I believe most problems can be solved.

Zeng Shu: You've misunderstood. There's no problem.

Zeng Shu: I'm just tired.

Zeng Shu: I want to take some time off.

Lucien: How much time off do you need?

Zeng Shu: I’m not trying to pressure you into approving my leave, Professor.

Zeng Shu: I just... need some time to really think about whether I’m actually suited for research.

Lucien: You’re not a fresh graduate.

Lucien: You’ve worked on your own projects, supervised students, and you’re experienced. You’ve also published numerous high-impact papers.

Lucien: I can't understand the meaning behind your statement.

Zeng Shu: …

Zeng Shu: Professor, I'm aware of everything you mentioned.

Zeng Shu: But not everyone can be like you, maintaining such passion for research no matter what.

Zeng Shu: And not everyone who pursues research is as gifted as you are.

Lucien: ...I always thought you were quite level-headed.

Lucien: I generally don't recommend bringing emotions into work.

Zeng Shu: Your judgment of me is not wrong; I am very calm right now.

Zeng Shu: From the moment I had this thought to... coming to your office, I've carefully considered it for three months.

Zeng Shu: This is the result of my comprehensive consideration. I hope you can approve it.

Lucien: …

Lucien: Do you want to withdraw from the current project, or are you not considering joining any future projects either?

Zeng Shu: I won't join any of them.

Lucien: Even the project you proposed two years ago? I received news last week that it can be officially approved.

Zeng Shu: Yes. I'm not considering it anymore.

Lucien: [sighs heavily] I understand.

Lucien: I will respect your decision.

Lucien: However, I hope you can continue to perform your related duties normally before you leave completely.

Lucien: If the project is affected at this stage, it will be difficult for either of us to handle.

Zeng Shu: I understand, don't worry.

Zeng Shu: I'll start the handover process tomorrow.

Lucien: Alright.

Zeng Shu: Sorry for the trouble, goodbye.

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

[T/N: This part is interesting because it shows how Lucien's subconscious 'expectation' extends not only to MC but also to the people who work with him. This 'expectation' can make people ‘tired’ and ‘exhausted’ from trying to keep up with him, and it's something that he himself is not really aware of. Additionally, I want to highlight how he doesn't understand the concept of being tired in a non-physical sense, like, at all, which will be important in a later part ;)]

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

—[Part 2]—

Sunlight streams through the windowsill, casting a brilliant and rejuvenating glow over the quiet room.

I walk into the computer room, swiftly turn on the computer, and bring up the rough cut of the video completed yesterday.

In the footage, the guest laughs endlessly in a seaside cottage. The suitable music and adorable text overlays convey the happiness even more directly.

I sit on the seat while hugging my legs, letting the laughter from the headphones linger in my mind, but it can't seem to drown out what happened yesterday.

I don't know when it started, but after putting in so much effort, success has somehow become a kind of arrogant ‘matter of course'.

Perhaps I've gotten used to the taste of success, so when failure arrives, I become even more at a loss.

And compared to this frustration... my mind returns to the firmly assured eyes I saw yesterday.

??: Boss, why are you here so early?

I lift my head and see Willow standing in front of me with a bit of a worried look.

MC: You're one to talk, didn't you come early too?

Willow: I just felt like something was up, so I thought I’d come and check on things.

She says that as she sits down next to me and turns on her computer. The dim glow of the screen reflects on her face, revealing traces of fatigue and frustration.

Yet, she turns her head and smiles at me.

Willow: Boss, do you want to take a break? You've been busy for a long time lately, haven't you?

I think I should say something, but as I gaze into those firm eyes, it seems like all words are inadequate.

In the end, I just shake my head with a smile.

MC: Don't worry, I'm not tired.

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Over the next week, the shadow of failure gradually fades away, and everything returns to normal.

Lucien is still busy, and I'm still immersed in the intense preparations for the summer special.

It's just that I often feel Lucien's gaze on me. During our interactions, he seems to observe me from time to time, yet he never says a word.

Is he thinking about how to comfort me, or is he worried that I'm just pretending to be strong?

After much thought, I stubbornly chose not to break his silence.

Compared to words, perhaps more proactive actions can show him that I have become more resilient.

It seems like an invisible thread is becoming more tense, but neither of us has the time to care.

I come home late at night and notice Lucien sitting on the sofa, looking at some documents.

A vast expanse of night covers him, and his eyes, as calm as still water, seem unable to be touched by any emotion.

MC: Lucien, are you okay?

He doesn't seem to notice my return. He freezes for a moment before slowly raising his head.

Lucien: I'm fine.

Speaking softly, he naturally draws me into a hug, his chin resting on my head. A long sigh escapes his lips.

The world becomes peaceful in the instant, fully contained within this gentle embrace.

MC: [worriedly] Is the experiment not going well?

Lucien: [inhales deeply before speaking softly] Mm. I've tried a few methods, but none of them can quite solve the problems.

Lucien: So, I'm thinking of throwing this out and starting from scratch.

MC: Is the direction wrong?

Lucien: [chuckles] Probably.

He remains silent for a while before continuing slowly.

Lucien: One of my senior research associates who's been working with me recently quit. No one can fill his shoes right now, so it's making the process a bit more troublesome.

Lucien: Overall, it might be more efficient to just start fresh.

MC: Why did he quit?

Lucien: He said he was too tired.

His calm voice seems full of incomprehension and ambivalence. Although I can't see Lucien's face at the moment, I can imagine his slightly furrowed brow.

Lucien: But theoretically, the work arrangements are sound, and I didn't force him to constantly monitor every result with me.

Lucien: So I don't know either.

Lucien: Since he was determined to leave, I let him go.

His tone reveals a rare cold sternness as if he is unwilling to waste time on unnecessary matters.

Lucien: There will always be a replacement.

I blink in a daze, feeling like I can see that senior professor.

I really want to say something to Lucien, but in the end, I still don't know how to start.

Lucien: MC, let's not talk about that. Actually, I really want to chat with you.

MC: Hmm?

He releases his hug and gently caresses my face.

Lucien: [in a gentle tone] I wonder if you're still feeling a bit sad because you didn't win the award for best work.

The soft moonlight made his face appear so gentle at this moment.

Under his dotingly gentle gaze, I don't want to hide my heart. I know Lucien has been waiting for a long time.

MC: Actually, I thought I had already secured victory, but unexpectedly, I failed.

MC: So when the results were announced, I felt very frustrated.

I look at Lucien honestly and muster up the courage.

MC: I originally thought this feeling of frustration was simply because… I failed.

MC: But when I saw you and when you congratulated me, subconsciously assuming that I should be the "best"...

I feel my voice tremble a little.

MC: It was then that I realized I hadn't fulfilled your expectations.

MC: And at that moment, it was the saddest time for me.

Lucien is rational and effortlessly capable. He believes that if something can be done, it can be done.

So he subconsciously believes that the heights I can reach are ones I will undoubtedly attain, or even surpass.

Otherwise, on this long and arduous journey of pursuit, I would only watch his figure grow further and further away.

In those slightly widened eyes, I see a lot of confusion and incomprehension.

Lucien: I…

“Ring ring-”

A sudden, insistent phone call interrupted him. After hesitating for a moment and seeing the caller ID, I decided to answer.

Man: Boss, urgent news! Looks like a storm is about to hit. The weather department says the coastal weather won't be good for the next two weeks.

Man: All the subsequent filming will be affected. We just went over the script and realized we need to make major changes.

Man: What should we do? Should we cancel it? Or what? The guests' schedules are kind of hard to change.

MC: It's definitely going to be difficult to change the guests' schedules now, and it will also affect the following weekly broadcasts. Let's revise the script.

I quickly run through the ideas in my head and a vague idea comes to me.

MC: Have the production team book me a flight tonight. I'm going straight there.

After hanging up the phone, the previous atmosphere has already dissipated. Lucien sits in front of me, much of his body falling into the shadows.

MC: Lucien, I didn't say those things to make you feel guilty or anything, because those were just my own feelings.

MC: It's me who wants to catch up to you and fulfill your expectations.

I smile and reach out to stroke his face, gently smoothing out the slight frown that forms unconsciously on his brow.

MC: I'll take care of my own feelings, so don't worry.

MC: I'll run even faster next time.

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

—[Memory Silhouette - The back of a running figure]—

MC: I'm leaving now. Make sure to drive safely on your way home!

Lucien: Relax, don't worry.

Lucien: You don't need to rush. There's always a solution.

MC: I know. Don't worry~ I'll message you as soon as I land. Don't wait up too late for me.

Lucien: [chuckles] Okay, I'll be sure to follow Miss Producer's instructions. I'll go to sleep as soon as I feel tired.

In the somewhat deserted early morning airport, the girl gives him a quick peck on the cheek before heading towards the security checkpoint.

The security checkpoint is almost empty, but she still instinctively turns her head and waves to him at every turn.

Yet, it seems like she hates to leave him waiting, so she keeps waving back at him non-stop.

Lucien: "Slow down."

He mouths the words, knowing full well the sound won’t reach her, yet somehow he still has this feeling that she can hear them.

As her figure walks into the security checkpoint, she waves to him one last time from dozens of meters away before disappearing from sight.

He doesn't know why, but looking at her figure from behind, he felt as if he was being escaped from.

This feeling makes him very uncomfortable.

He furrows his brows in irritation and turns to walk into the black night.

Where exactly did things start to go wrong?

The girl's slightly bitter smile flashes back into his mind, but it brings more confusion than answers.

Why does his unconscious firm assuredness sadden her more than the failure itself?

Why do I feel assured that she can do it, and why does she think my expectations are so important?

We're clearly not on the same track.

Clearly, she can have her own pace, and I also allow her to fail...

Is it because I am someone special to her?

Does she want to meet my expectations? But my expectation is for her to just be happy and always within my sight*.

Do I have any other expectations for her?

Too many fragmented questions flood his mind, and each one of them feels unfamiliar and chaotic. This feeling of not having a starting point unconsciously makes him a bit infuriated.

There are still more tricky problems and troubles at work waiting for him, which he has to tackle one by one.

Despite thinking this way, her face still appears again and again among the numerous and complicated tasks in his mind.

Compared to those things that can be redone or thrown away, he feels some kind of deep-seated emptiness and unease.

He feels as if she has left him far behind, as if she knows more things that he cannot comprehend.

This feeling makes him even more irritable.

He instinctively turns at a fork in the road and continues until the familiar white building comes into view. Even so, his irritation doesn't seem to have subsided even a bit.

At this moment, his phone vibrates. He looks down and sees that it's a departure message from her.

MC’s message: "I'm boarding~ Just let me know when you get home! Don't forget to go to bed early~”

His fingers, naturally inclined to send a reply in the next second, hesitate just before hitting send. He closes his eyes and temporarily turns off the screen.

In that instant, he suddenly feels very childish.

What does it mean to say that she can handle her own emotions, yet still wants to run away to a faraway place?

He doesn't know the answer and can't think of a way to solve it.

He hurriedly walks into the lab. His sudden appearance caught everyone off guard. After a moment of stunned silence, they quickly come forward to greet him.

Assistant: Professor, why are you here?

Lucien: It's nothing. I'm just here to handle some other work. You can carry on.

Saying this, he walks into his own laboratory.

He doesn't plan to think about it anymore. There are still many things waiting for him, many plans and arrangements to implement—

Lucien: [whispers softly] Why…

The sound of the plane seems to pass overhead in the distance, and the night grows even darker.

Suddenly, he feels very lonely**.

✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

[T/N: *: Just want to expand on what Lucien said here! One of his expectations is ‘for her always within my sight', I think it refers to what he said back in S2 ch 51

MC: Maybe it’s because I know that no matter where I go, you'll always be watching over me. MC: Lucien, I hope you can always keep your eyes on me. Lucien: Of course, I will always watch over you. Until... you go to a place that even I can’t reach...-

-that no matter where the direction she goes he will always watch over her 🤧 I personally like this quote a LOT, like it's more or less what's ‘growing’ in his route feels like. He won't stop you and will support anything you do, no matter what you'll ‘grow’ to be. Even if you walk in a different direction from him, even if what you do is risky, even if the road is full of failures… He'll always give his unconditional attention, support, and safety from afar. He hopes for her to be ‘always within his sight’ so that he can continue to do so 🥺

**: "寂寞" often conveys a more profound and enduring sense of isolation than "loneliness”. It emphasizes the emotional aspect of feeling isolated or abandoned such as the sadness, emptiness and the yearningಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ]

Next Part=> [Click Here]

[mist-the-wannabe-linguist]

So, Pern has limited resources for writing materials, illiteracy is common among people and there is strong oral tradition. Aside from songs this also means the Pernese people should have many proverbs. I know there are already some canon ones, but to spice things up a little I tried to translate some Czech proverbs and sayings and adapt them to fit Pern, which turned out to be a pretty fun exercise. If you have ideas for your own, do share! If you'd like to use any of mine in fics and such, feel free!

Here goes:

"don't provoke a (tunnel) snake with your bare foot" - don't tempt fate

"no Master Harper has ever fallen from the sky" - orig. "no scholar has ever fallen from the sky", no one is born an expert; it's okay to make mistakes

"once in a Long Interval" - orig. "once in a Hungarian year", same as "once in a blue moon"

"to make a herdbeast a Masterfarmer" - orig. "to make a billy goat the gardener", to make someone manage a task they're woefully unqualified for

"every rider praises his own dragon"/"every feline praises its own spots" - orig. "every fox praises its own tail", people tend to emphasize the virtues of whatever is dear to them, or whatever they're trying to sell

"to wheedle a clutch out of a green" - orig. "to wheedle a calf out of a heifer", to be very convincing; to charm someone into doing absolutely anything

"Weaver, stick to your yarns" - orig. "shoemaker, stick to your last", you should stick to things you truly understand

"yeah, and then the Harpers sang for him"/"and now tell the one about a talking wherry" - orig. "and they said they sang for him"/"and now the one about Little Red Riding Hood", said when you don't believe anything someone's just told you

"one about a wagon, the other about dragon" - orig. "one about a goat, the other about a cart", when people talk about completely different things while thinking they're on the same note

"after Threadfall, everyone is a Weyrleader" - orig. "after battle, everyone is a general", it's easy to criticize things in hindsight, especially for unqualified people

"a Smith's runnerbeast walks barefoot" - orig. "a blacksmith's horse walks barefoot", those who craft/sell a particular thing often don't have enough of it for themselves

"so the dragon can eat and the herdbeast remains whole" - orig. "so the wolf can eat and the goat remains whole", essentially "to have your cake and eat it too", a solution that deals with the unpleasant aspects while still benefiting you

"wait like a guardfowl for grain" - orig. "wait like a goose for grain", advice to be patient

"having cheek is better than owning a Hold" - orig. "having cheek is better than owning a Meierhof", being daring and impudent often gets you in better places than being rich

"a fire-lizard on your shoulder is better than a bronze/queen on the Sands" - orig. "a sparrow in your hand is better than a pigeon on the roof", it's better to be grateful for smaller things you already have than to hope for things you have no guarantee of getting

"who wants to beat a wher always finds a cane" - orig. "who wants to beat a dog always finds a cane", people who want to do harm always find a way to do so

"fast of wing, short of mind"/"he's like a green - fast of wing..." - orig. "fast of feet, short of mind", an impulsive person who doesn't think things through

"bubbly pies don't bake themselves"/"roasted wherries won't fly in your mouth" - orig. "kolache don't bake themselves"/"roasted pigeons won't fly in your mouth", if you want something, you have to work for it

"for a quarter-mark he'd let them drill through his knee" - when someone is willing to do anything for money, even at the cost of one's own wellbeing

"beauty without a good heart is like a house without door, a spring without water, a rider without a dragon" - physical appearance means nothing when the person is bad

"every Hold has bread with two crusts" - every place has good and bad things

"what has once left your mouth, not even a pair of draft beasts can pull back" - watch what you say because you can't take it back

"fish start to smell from the head" - when something isn't working, the problem is likely in upper management

"doesn't have to be a downpour, a drizzle is enough" - success doesn't have to come all at once

"smart ones need advice, dumb ones need a kick" - for some people a hint isn't enough, they need to be shown explicitly

"the heart won't ache for what the eyes can't see" - some things do less harm if they're kept secret; blissful ignorance is sometimes better

"sing the song of those who give you bread" - kind of like "don't bite the hand that feeds you"; if you take favors from someone, you should act in their favor too

"he who digs a hole for others often falls in himself" - essentially "hoist by his own petard"

"the tunic is closer than the coat" - people tend to focus on their own interests rather than the interests of wider society

"the scythe has hit a rock" - when someone encounters something beyond their competence

"repetition is the mother of wisdom" - essentially "practice makes perfect", but sounds fancier. could be especialy in connection to memorizing teaching songs

"don't fight fire that doesn't burn you" - mind your own business, don't try to fix other people's problems

"the sated don't believe the hungry" - privileged people tend not to believe others' misfortunes

"he's got butter on his head" - essentially "keeping skeletons in his closet"

"rough fabric needs rough patching" - being soft on nasty people will achieve nothing, you have to answer in the person's own language

"the cape goes where the wind blows" - when someone is too obedient, a blind follower. said as "he's kind of a 'the cape goes where the wind blows' kind of person"

"honey in his mouth, venom in his heart" - a charming, sweet-spoken, but malicious person

Edit: more in reblogs!

[serpentandlily]

Lost in a Labyrinth Part III Teaser

Lost in a Labyrinth Part III Teaser

Azriel x Reader

Summary: Lonely and heartbroken after his near kiss with Elain, Azriel finds himself at the door to the most exclusive pleasure house in Hewn City, The Labyrinth, taking Rhysand’s cruel advice. What he expected to find was a pretty girl to warm a bed with him for a single night. But instead he finds something he never thought existed—his mate. A mate that is tangled up in something far more sinister than he could ever imagine.

A/n: guys I thought I’d have a lot more time to write today and I, unfortunately, don’t :(( but here’s another lil sneak peek at what’s to come in the Labyrinth Series!

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

Part III Teaser

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

…and when he shall die,

Take him and cut him out in little stars,

And he will make the face of heaven so fine

That all the world will be in love with night

And pay no worship to the garish sun.

- William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

The First Attempt

Poison was the easiest and cleanest way to kill somebody. It involved very little effort on your part, just a slip of the hand to pour the poison into their drink when they weren't looking. It usually didn't involve blood or puke unless you got one of the nastier poisons, which you never did anyways. Some of the girls were more sadistic though and well, you couldn't blame them for it.

But while it was the simplest method of killing someone, it was probably one of the harder ones to pull off. First, faeries had very good senses, especially when it came to smell. One sniff of their drink could expose the poison in it, unless you were able to get your hands on one of the odorless ones. Those were more expensive though and Lydia and Keir certainly weren't willing to fund you guys besides your nightly rate from your clients.

However, when you had made a trip to the apothecary in the underbelly of Hewn City, you had begrudgingly forked over the money for one of those clear, odorless poisons. There was no way anything else would get past Azriel and his shadows.

Your heart ached in your chest as you stared at the decanter of whiskey sitting on the bar cart in your pleasure room. Azriel had been kind to you. He had offered you some mercy by buying out your nights and not returning until that fateful meeting at the party. And while he clearly liked being more dominant while bedding you, his touch had been gentle, soft. No one had ever shown you such care and here you were, plotting out his murder.

But you simply had to do this. Freedom was only one dead body away for you. One more hit and you could finally wash your hands of this place, disappear to another court—perhaps one that would allow you to bathe in the sunlight for the rest of your days, something the citizens of Hewn City had never really experienced.

Kill Azriel.

Kill the shadowsinger and you'll be free to go.

Those had been Keir's exact words.

You had killed before. There was a time when your finger was covered in black lines, a new one added every time you didn't have enough money to pay the house fee or enough for food and had to borrow from Lydia. One every time you failed to perform for a client, no matter what they asked of you. But now you were down to one last mark.

One for the Shadowsinger.

One for Azriel.

You let out a sigh, sitting down at your vanity to brush your hair. Azriel was due to show up any moment now. Ever since that night at the party, he had been coming by at this time every single night. He would buy out all the nights Lydia would allow him to before showing up.

He never even made it seem like he expected sex on any given night. Sometimes the two of you would just cuddle in bed, whispering stories to each other about your lives. Sometimes he would come all tense and frustrated with whatever the High Lord had demanded of him. On those nights you would offer to give him a massage and listen to him complain about how much he hated his work. It seemed like the two of you had that in common, at the very least.

You hadn't made any attempts yet. You told yourself it was because you were planning out the best way to kill Azriel. Poison, knives, strangling. There were a multitude of ways to do it. But you knew deep down what the true reason was. You had grown fond of the Shadowsinger. You didn't want to kill him.

But your wants and needs had never really ever agreed with each other your whole life.

So here you were. Waiting for Azriel to come so you could poison him and be done with this Gods awful place. You wanted out of the labyrinth and unfortunately, this was the only way.

No matter how much you liked Azriel, he was the one standing in the way of your freedom.

[notetaeker]

Hello!!! How did you become so dedicated to your studies? Do you have some advice?

I love your blog, btw✨️

Hi hi hi!! Thanks for the sweet message 💞💞

My BIG study tips (after 25 years of studying):

Accept your fate. This goes for anything but I used to procrastinate with studying a LOT and once you start it's actually not that bad. It's guaranteed. Automatically once you start, you have started, so you're already on your way, so it's already automatically not as bad anymore. Whining abt ur studies and avoiding them will not make them go away unfortunately. Just do it.

Make study time sacred. A few minutes of focused study is much more valuable than 5 hours spent at the library "studying" + scrolling + talking to friends + listening to music at the same time. Doing 5 hours like that is literally putting yourself thru hell because 1. you cant fully enjoy any of those non-studying activities and 2. you come out of that being like ugh I studied this page for 5 hours I'm tired of studying I need a break. Pomodoro method really changed my life pls try it out if u haven't already

That one tumblr post that says 'learning is basically being exposed to the same materials many times in multiple ways' is 100% correct. How many different ways can you expose yourself to the material. Memorizing facts- can you draw it? Can you organize the facts into lists? Can you attach a funny story to one of the facts? The more ways you interact with any material, the stronger it's saved in your memory. Find out if you're a visual learner- and then create visual tools, maybe color coding things helps you. Do a little digging and find out what works for you.

Diversify your life. Have some hobbies, spend time with friends/family, take a break. Let the computer of your brain sort out things in the background while you do other things. Once you go back to studying, you will feel refreshed (and not fatigued from 5 hrs in the library doing "studying") This also means that if you fail an exam, you won't be like 'oh no i spent my whole spring break studying for this exam and didn't even enjoy it and now I got a bad grade i must be horrible my life is nothing' and spiral. def not based on a true story :) Instead you'll be like yeah I failed but look at this scarf I crocheted look at mee i have mental health!

Sleep is magic- no matter what anyone else tries to tell you. 1. If you studied something during the day, just review those things right before bed and magically they will get set into your brain. Also 2. sleeping is when our brain sorts info so if you don't get any sleep at all it' the same as taking your study sheets and throwing them into the air, so when you ask your brain for the info during the test it's like lol it's around here somewhere. On the other hand, if you slept and gave ur brain time to sort it, when you ask for that info, it'll just open the right drawer and give u the info!

That's it for the big ones- if you want more specific advice feel free to ask! Also as a disclaimer, these 5 are all big life lessons that I had to learn thru trial and error, so consider these to be the advice I would give myself at a younger age. Pls don't be offended lol whenever I said 'you' I rlly was thinking abt myself.

[darkestspring]

Yandere kocaları Aegon1 ve Maegor için daha fazla yazabilir misiniz? Please🥺 Onlar hakkında gerçekten çok az şey yazılmıştır.

of course lovely! i love writing about aegon I and maegor, thank you for your request <3!

Aegon I "The Conquerer" Targaryen

From the moment that Aegon had seen you, admiring the flowers that grew on the castle grounds, he had deemed you his. He hadn't cared about what anyone else thought. He took the advice of his sister-wives to heart but not even that would stop him from pursuing you.

Not when they claimed that to take you as wife would be to declare war on the North. You were the King of the North's precious daughter. The one he held dear to his heart.

You were dear to Aegon's heart too. So, he had taken you as his wife. His heart.

"My love." He called out, watching you look back with the doe eyes he's grown to love so much. "Shall I have them place flowers in your chambers?"

You smiled at him hesitantly, to be honest he intimidated you slightly. His capacity for violence where it concerned you made it so that you had to choose your words and actions carefully. Not just you but everyone when it pertained to you.

"That is not... necessary, my husband." You left the flowers behind to approach him. You never saw such flowers in the north, your beloved north covered in snow. You reached up to press a kiss to his cheek. "I am content with the way my chambers are now." Not that you spent much time in them.

"Come." He held out his hand to you. "You know you aren't allowed to be out here alone. Come join Visenya, Rhaenys, and myself in the dinner hall. I had them make your favorite for tonight, my wife."

A shiver ran up your spine as his eyes ran over your figure possessively. You hoped no one would die tonight. "Ye-" You swallowed as you tried to regain your composure. "Yes, my love." You placed your hand in his. Warmth filled your hand as you, once more, sealed your fate.

Maegor "The Cruel" Targaryen

All your time not with Maegor, which was very little considering he made it a point to keep you with him most of the time, was spent either in the gardens or in your chambers. He had been elated when the maester had confirmed that you were with child.

"you're finally mine. My wife, with my baby in her womb." He had whispered with all of his possessiveness into your ear and you had managed to not shudder.

You didn't dislike your husband. In fact, compared to the treatment he gave to his other wives, he treated you kindly, softly but you felt shackled all the same. He was a king, and your husband. How could you refuse him. His word was law. But you didn't hate him, you tried to hardest to treat him as your mother had treated your father. With love, with kindness, an attentive and string wife.

"My love." He whispered against your skin, pressing kisses to your cheek repeatedly. "I missed you so much. How dull the day is, without you to keep me company." Even if he had washed the blood off, you could still smell it. It filled the air and suffocated you.

"I missed you too, my husband." You had mastered smiling at him with softness even when he was covered in blood. You placed your hand on his cheek.

Maegor had never once regretted any of his actions towards you. Taking you as his wife, killing your family once they refused out of concern for you, making it so that you could not go anywhere without him or a crowd of guards. You were his wife. He would not lose you to some lesser lord.

He refused to set you free or let you go. You would always be his wife, even in death.

[rfswitchart]

What Redemption Means to Me

With the passing of Akira Toriyama as well as some things going on in my life, I think I'd like to talk about something that means a lot to me in writing... Redemption Arcs. Obviously, Vegeta's gonna be talked about here. Hunter from Owl House, sure. And I'll even throw Zuko from ATLA in here for free.

All three of them are considered evil right off the bat. They don't hide that they will do cruel and horrible things to either get their way or because it's fun. Then we find out that they weren't really evil so much as horribly abused and used to serve a purpose (Vegeta was basically handed to Frieza because King Vegeta and the rest of the Sayians were oppressed. Hunter did everything for Belos, who he thought was his uncle, and that Belos 'cared' for him. Zuko was 'dishonored' because his father said so, not to mention he got his face burned by his father.) And that their behavior is a reflection of the suffering and lives they've had. That, of course, is why we see them change...

Vegeta, on his dying breath in the battle against Frieza, basically told Goku everything about the fate of the Sayians, crying tears of anguish because he couldn't avenge his people after what the alien tyrant did. His heart changes even further when he has a relationship with Bulma and they have Trunks and Bulla. Does he lapse back into old habits and desire to defeat Goku? Sure. But even when he becomes Majin, he realizes that his family give him something strength can never give him. Love, the love of family long lost, and hope that his species will live on through his children.

Hunter, meanwhile, meets Luz and it made him question if helping his uncle is worth it. This was further compounded after kidnapping the Entrails when he realized he was hurting Willow and would rob them of their palismen to feed Belos and grant him a longer life. After seeing he was just a disposable puppet and clone of Belos brother (That he murdered,) Hunter fled to Hexside and eventually befriended Gus. Hunter lived a sheltered life and is saved by friendship and love (yes, Hunter and Willow were basically in love from the get go. Y'all need better media literacy if you think otherwise.)

Now, Zuko is a little different. Sure, the Gaang did help him figure things out and help him see the error in his ways, but who are we kidding. The thing that truly put Zuko on the path of good was his uncle, Iroh. Iroh never lost faith in his nephew, even when the boy lost his way and betrayed him. He always tried to show Zuko the right path to follow and give him advice when he needed it. Granted, it couldn't help Zuko make a decent cup of tea, but hey, he did at least come to understand what was right and gave him the tools to forge his own destiny.

Personally, I like these stories because my life has also been a redemption arc of sorts. Stop me if you've heard this one before. I was bullied and abused by family, classmates, friends, and lovers. I hurt people and lashed out because I was hurt and scared, even people I care about. And then, realized I messed up and having people who genuinely love and support me, I started to change into a better, more loving and compassionate person. Characters like Vegeta, Hunter, and Zuko are the kinds of people I am. People who have been misguided and done wrong, but also have worked hard to become much better people. No one is ever beyond redemption... I mean, unless you're Frieza, Belos, or Ozai. Fuck them.

[novelcain]

Hi! You can call me anon Ara and I absolutely love the triad au lmk thing! Like lmao it's funny but terrifying at the part where the reader got kidnaps and swk just go batshit over it but still we love protective monkeys😍

Speaking of monkeys swk and Macaque are both my fav but I'm more focused on Macaque(sorry swk you will be miss/lh) man just sits in the corner while playing games and let swk do his work, I'm living for that but I got some hcs for this monkey in this au

Like everytime when Macaque saw swk with his girl getting lovey dovey he goes "ew love and affection🤮" and he hate it, at least that's what he thought until he met someone he head over heels for liek another reader! Or a person, idk up to you like working in a cafe or a bakery or something up to you and how they became friends is maybe when Macaque visit the bakery or cafe to take some foods from swk order or anything and then the reader just greets him nicely and smh they spark up a conversation and then they share the same interest(theater show, shadow play thing) and now Macaque can't stop his heart beating rapidly

(oh uh is the six eared Macaque falling in love😳)

And then he ask swk for advice and then swk goes "what wrong BUD? I thought you hate love and affection😏" and tease the hell out of him and Macaque grumbles but gets the most helpful(hopefully) advice from swk and ask the traffic light trios(MK, Mei and Red son) for advice too and regret it cuz they start teasing him too

That's all I got, I love Macaque so much ugh and I absolutely love the au, sorry for ramble too much😔

OMFG! Ara anon I love your brain you inspired such a GALAXY level big brain idea!

What if Macaque was one day sent on a mission to find the hacker that's been shutting them down and leaking plans for weeks now. He tracks this person all the way to a rival gang where he finds... a young woman... in a locked room. 

The room was just barely large enough to hold a small mattress and a desk with at least five monitors crammed into it. The girl was currently typing anyway at her keyboard at a pace that would put even him to shame. She appeared to be upset and tired based on her scowl and eyebags. 

She clearly didn't want to be here. 

"My, my. What have we here~?" 

You whipped around to find the source of the voice within the dark room but found nothing. 

"A little bird stuck in a cage~?" 

The voice was suddenly right next to you, and you snapped your head around to find none other than The Six Eared Macaque from the triad you had been forced to target. 

You gulped as you tried to keep your composure. You knew this would happen. You tried to warn them, but they wouldn't listen. Sun Wukong doesn't take kindly to people getting in his way. 

And now you were going to pay the price. 

"Are you... are you going to kill me?" You asked. 

"Hmmm..." The demon tilted his head unsettlingly slow as he seemed to think over your fate. 

You jumped back in your chair as the monkey slammed his hands down onto either arm rest. His nose was nearly touching yours now as he bared his fangs in a menacing grin. However, despite feeling like you would break down into tears at any moment, you managed to keep your nervousness from showing. 

Interesting, he thought. 

"That depends~... Did you do this of your own free will, or were you forced too? Oh, and. Don't bother lying. I can hear your sweet little heartbeat~."