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#Hope we can do more stuff like this in the future as well!!
mama2bears · 3 days
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Matters Of The Heart
This was a request messaged to me by @lonewolf830. I am going to try to drag this out and make a little longer story out of your idea. I hope you like the direction it goes!
Pairings: Scott/F.Reader(Scott is an ass), future Tyler/F.Reader
Warnings: A few swear words. Tornado damage. (Future Chapters will have Whump, hurt/comfort, and angst.) Inaccurate weather stuff
Summary: You are new to Storm Par and Tyler Owens is already chasing you. Scott has already asked you out on a date and warned you against Tyler, so you brush off Tyler, believing everything Scott has told you. However, when you are put in danger, it's always Tyler running to your rescue. You begin to wonder if maybe Tyler isn't all that bad after all.
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Chapter 1
You were standing in the parking lot, gazing out over the horizon at the building storm clouds. The wind gently blew though your hair. A large group of storm chasers were gathering in preparation for the upcoming expected tornado outbreak across Oklahoma. This was your first day on the job with the Storm Par company. Your job was to track the storm's location and they were to follow it, gather information, and for reason's you didn't yet understand, you were suppose to help get property information on the places that got destroyed.
The sudden blare of country music filled the air along with the roar of an engine. You look up to see a red Dodge Ram pull in followed by a van and RV. A guy in a white cowboy hat and sun glasses gets out as a crowd surround the truck.
“If you feel it....” he yelled.
“CHASE IT!!!” the crowd yells back.
“I said IF YOU FEEL IT....” He yelled a little louder and the crowd responded with “CHASE IT!”
You watched for a few moments as he was laughing and signing autographs as he posed for photos.
“Alright you tornado nerds!” a woman yelled from the RV, holding some shirts up. Everyone flocked to her with money in hand.
You shook your wondering what kind of crazy that group of storm chasers were, and why did it seem like everyone loved them so much. The wind shifted and you turned your attention back to the sky.
“Hey. I'm Tyler. You new to chasing?” a deep voice came from behind.
You turned to see the guy in the white cowboy hat that was just surrounded by a group of fans. You couldn't help but notice the sparkle in his green eyes when he took off his glasses, or the way he smiled, the stumbled face.
“Yeah, first day.” you gave him a soft smile, “I am Y/N.” you extend a hand to him.
His rough callused hand felt strong and warm, yet tender as he shook your hand, “What team you with?” he asked.
“Storm Par.”
“Oh...them.” Tyler rolled his eyes. “You can do better then that, you know.”
“What's wrong with Storm Par? They seem like a really nice company, and the pay is great.”
“Y/N! Let's go!” Scott, your partner barked from across the parking lot.
“Well, gotta go.” you gave Tyler another smile. “It was really nice to meet you. You seem to have quite the following.”
“I do.” he nodded and tipped his cowboy hat at you, “Nice to meet you too, Y/N.”
Standing there, he watched you walk away, his eyes following the movement of your butt swaying. 'Hope to see you again soon.' he thought to himself.
“Hey.” you call to Scott as you get in the truck, “Looks like we need to head west.”
“What the hell were you doing talking to Owens?” Scott yelled, causing you to jump.
“Owens? His name was Tyler.” you say, a bit startled, “He was just being nice, introducing himself.”
“Tyler OWENS is his name, and he's nothing but trouble. Stay away from him.” Scott muttered, looking at the data on the laptop you held. “You sure about the west? I think the East holds more promise.” he muttered.
“Go west. Trust me.” you smile at him.
“Fine. West it is. But if you're wrong, it's your ass. Not mine.” He sped out of the parking lot.
“Come on. Let's go.” Tyler jumped into the truck, seeing the same thing you just had. “We're going west.”
“What's so wrong with Tyler?” you ask once on the road.
“He's Mr. YouTube star. He sells merch to make a buck off of everyone. He's got a new girl every night it seems. He thinks he's some Mr. Big shot, better then everyone else. He reels you in with that Mr. Nice Guy act and then he uses you for whatever you're good for and tosses you out like trash.”
“Oh.” you are taken aback by Scott's harsh words. Tyler didn't come across as that type of person from your first meeting, but...that was one meeting. He was selling stuff and he did have a large following. You could believe what Scott was telling you. After all, Scott had been doing this for several years and probably knew Tyler a lot better then you would have from just a quick meeting. “Thanks for the warning.” you gave a smile to Scott.
“Oh come on, you didn't actually fall for his act? Did you?” Scott looked over at you with a look of disbelief.
“Well...I mean...he wasn't bad to look at and he was nice.” you grin with a shrug.
“Really, Y/N? I thought you were smarter then that.”
“Make a right here.” you say. “I was just going off my first impression. I am sure I would have figured him out pretty quickly on my own...but seriously, thank you for the warning. I can avoid that heartbreak.”
Scott pulls off to the right and follows a dirt road. “Avoid him all together. He's bad news.” he muttered, “Hey, if you want to go out and have a good time, let me know. I'll take you out. I am not a womanizer like he is.”
“Oh, is that so?” you grin, “You mean to tell me someone as nice looking as you doesn't have a girlfriend?”
“Nope.” Scott shook his head, “Not many girls want to go chasing after tornadoes.” he shoots you a look, his eyes seemly undressing you and he grins, “What you say, sweetie? Go out with me tonight?”
You shrug, “Okay, sure. If it's not against company policy or anything.”
“Not at all.” Scott grins, “We'll go down to the Reno bar tonight. It's right down the road from the hotel. Sound good?”
“Sure...” you start to say and then scream, “SCOTT! WATCH OUT!”
Music blasts from the speakers as Tyler's red Dodge Ram cuts you off. He is yelling something at you, but over the music and Scott cussing, you can't hear what it is...you don't really care at the moment.
“Asshole!” Scott was yelling as he fought to get the truck back on the road.
Suddenly, Tyler turned his truck sideways, blocking your path.
“What the HELL man!” Scott rolls down his window yelling.
“TURN AROUND! It's an EF 5 up ahead! Check your data again. You can't drive THAT truck into an EF5! I wouldn't drive MY truck into one. TURN AROUND!” Tyler yelled.
“Fuck you man!” Scott tried to drive around but Tyler pulled forward, bumping into the white Storm Par truck.
“Listen, if you want to get yourself killed, go for it! But don't be taking her into that!” Tyler yelled, his eyes locking on yours. “Y/N, check the data. Am I right?”
You frantically punch the keys on the laptop refreshing the screen. “Oh my God.” you gasp. “Scott, he's right. It's MASSIVE! We gotta turn around.”
“Fine...Whatever.” Scott turns the truck around and glares at you, “Why the hell did you tell me to go this way if it's an EF5! YOU told me to turn right. I did that!”
“It wasn't that big when I checked it last! It just blew up!” you try to defend yourself. This was a great first impression. “Sorry.” you muttered.
“Just...pay more attention next time.” he said.
“I will.” you mutter, refreshing the feed again on the laptop, “Looks like the tornado is moving to the west. It's out of the town now. We should go back there and see if we can be of any help. I can't imagine the destruction..”
Scott pulls the truck into a parking lot and glares at you, “If you are going to work with Storm Par, you've got to understand time is money. We don't get paid to help people. We get paid for the storm data, we get paid for the property data...we don't get paid to help. That's someone else's job...not ours.”
You nod and he turns around heading back into town. As you drive though, you see houses and businesses completely leveled. You notice Tyler's truck parked among the rumble and he was climbing over a destroyed house calling for what you guessed was a dog. The woman from the RV was selling stuff from the back of it and another girl was walking around with food and water, passing them out.
It looked like they were helping, but you also could see what Scott said about them selling stuff was true.
“It's all a show.” Scott's voice cuts into your thoughts. “They brag about how much they help so they can get more money from their followers and more people will want to buy shirts. They aren't really helping, they're only promoting themselves.” he scoffed.
You sigh as he stops the truck, “Here. Go give our card to everyone who's lost their home or business. Tell them we make cash offers for their properties. Get information from all who are interested and then run some numbers for us. See what the property value is and make sure we find out what kind of insurance they have.”
“Scott, are you sure this is the right time for that? I mean, they JUST lost everything...should we really be swooping in offering to buy whatever they have left?” you frown. Your heart broke for these people and this idea just wasn't sitting right with you.
“It's our job. It's what we do.” Scott sighed, “Seriously Y/N. I thought you were excited about this job! So far all you've done was almost got us killed and complained! If we don't get to them now someone else will and we will lose out on that money.”
“Alright. You're right. I am sorry. I am just trying to learn this job.” you sigh and get out of the truck, walking up to a lady and introducing yourself. She was in tears. “I am so sorry. If you need anything, call us at Storm Par.” you give her a hug. “Did you have insurance on the house?”
“No.” the woman cried shaking her head.
“I am so sorry.” your heart broke for her, “Storm Par would be willing to make a cash offer on your land. If that's the road you want to take, give us a call.”
“Okay.” she mumbled, and walked away calling for her cat.
“Hey, Y/N...close call there.” Tyler jogged up to your side. “You okay?”
“Yeah. Thank you. For stopping us. It's my fault, I should have been paying attention.”
Tyler frowned, “It's not your fault. That storm just exploded. We were following it too. It didn't look that big and then wham, all of a sudden it was a monster. Once you guys got turned around we drove on into town to try to warn as many people as possible and get them into shelter.”
You nod, “And sell your brand, I see.”
“What's that suppose to mean?” Tyler frowned.
“Don't worry. Scott told me all about you and what you do.” you turn and walk away in a huff.
“Did he also tell you what Storm Par is all about?” Tyler yelled after you.
“Hey there, beautiful.” Scott runs up to you after seeing that you were talking to Tyler, “Is he bothering you again?”
“Nothing I can't handle.” you smile at Scott, “I am really sorry I messed things up before.”
“It's okay. It's your first day. You'll learn. What did you find out on the properties?” he asked.
“That lady there has no insurance. I gave her a card and told her Storm Par would be interested.”
“Good girl. See, you're getting it.” Scott pulls you into a hug and looks back to see Tyler glaring at him. He gives you a quick kiss on the cheek, “I am looking forward to our date tonight.”
You blush slightly as Scott winks at you and jogs back to the truck.
“Hey, you want water or food or anything?” A girl asks. You recognize her as one of the people on Tyler's crew. “No, I am good. I am not giving you any money.”
“It's not about the money. We give away food and water when we get to a disaster scene. That's why we sell the merchandise. We sell to those who are able to afford to buy it. We give to those who can not. We give away almost as many shirts as we sell. The money we get from the sales goes to buy food and water for the victims and volunteers helping.”
“Oh. I had heard something different.” you say, “I am still okay. We've got stuff back in the truck and I am heading there to run some numbers for them.”
“Okay, whatever. If you change your mind come on over. We have plenty.” she walked away, handing out a sandwich and water to the woman you spoke to earlier.
You walk slowly back to the truck and get in, hearing Scott talking to someone on the phone about buying properties and who didn't have good insurance and those who did. Scott hanged up and gave you smile. “Let's go get something to eat.”
“I don't think that's a great idea right now.” you say, looking at the radar. “Look, this cell to the south is looking bad.”
Scott glances at it and shrugs, “I've seen worse. Let's go. I am hungry.”
Tyler looks at the sky to the south and watches as Scott turns and heads directly into the oncoming storm.
“Shit.” he muttered, then turned and waved at his team. “I'll be back in a bit.” he called and ran to his truck, firing it up and taking off after you and Scott. He didn't care if Scott wanted to get himself killed, but he'd be damned if he was going to let you be put in danger because of it.
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drewharrisonwriter · 3 days
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Friends Without Benefits
Status: One Shot, Complete
Summary: Even if you don't believe it, Dieter Bravo is actually capable of having platonic friendships.
Word Count: 10.5k words
Warnings: strong language, heavy flirtation, sexual tension (no smut--can you believe it??), mentions of past affairs and scandals, alcohol consumption, references to Dieter’s reckless behavior, mentions of drug use, emotional vulnerability, humor, inappropriate jokes (because, Dieter!), legal contract about not fucking
A/N: Okay, I know what you're thinking… another Dieter fic? Yeah, I know—it’s like my fourth one, so clearly, the brain rot is real, and I’m trying to get it out of my system (seriously, I’m trying… sort of). I know I haven’t updated Lifeline in a hot minute, but we’ll get to that later, lol. This fic is a little different from the usual—there’s a lot more fluff and friendship stuff, but I really enjoyed playing with the dynamic of two people who could totally cross the line but decide not to (because, honestly, it’s working for them as is). Also, apologies for any typos—I tried proofreading, but doing it on my phone isn’t exactly ideal. Thanks for reading, and let me know what you think!
P.S. My laptop, which served me well for 5 years, just gave out. With grad school, the recent loss of my stepdad, and ongoing medical bills, finances are tight. I’m currently managing writing commissions and my dissertation from my phone, which is okay but really challenging. If you can help with a donation or by commissioning some of my writing, or just by simply commenting or reblogging, it would mean the world to me. 💜 Thank you from the bottom of my heart for any support you can offer. 💜🙏🏻
Read this on AO3 | Check out my Masterlist
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It started with a rejection email.
Not the kind that offered hope for future opportunities, but the type that crushed your spirit in one curt sentence:
"We regret to inform you that your application for the Screenwriting Development Program has not been accepted."
She read it over twice, then a third time, hoping something had been missed. A reason, some constructive feedback, anything. But it was just a copy-paste response sent to dozens—maybe hundreds—of other hopefuls like her. She blinked away the sting in her eyes and put the laptop to sleep.
The screen faded to black, reflecting back an image she barely recognized anymore: tangled hair, circles under her eyes, and the lingering trace of a smile she hadn’t used in days.
“Whatever,” she muttered to herself. “I didn’t need it anyway.”
That was a lie.
The Screenwriting Development Program was her shot, her dream, the chance to step out of her day-to-day grind and into the world she’d always wanted. A world where she wrote stories that people would actually care to hear.
But she didn’t have time to dwell on it. In fifteen minutes, she had to be at the diner. She grabbed her apron off the back of a chair and stuffed it into her bag before heading out.
As usual, the shift was long. And slow. She spent most of her time refilling coffee for the regulars and plastering on a smile that barely reached her eyes. The rejection lingered like a dark cloud, reminding her how close she was to giving up completely. By the time her shift ended, she was so exhausted that she didn’t even change out of her uniform. She just grabbed her bag and headed out into the night.
The long walk up to her apartment felt heavier than usual. It wasn’t until she reached her front door that the next wave of despair hit her like a punch to the gut.
An eviction notice.
She stared at the paper taped to her door, her heart sinking.
“Great,” she whispered bitterly, ripping it off and crumpling it into a ball before shoving it into her bag.
Four weeks. She had four weeks to come up with the rent, or she’d be out on the street.
Later, she sat on her couch in her underwear and a camisole, trying to ignore the cold chill of the eviction notice that still hovered at the edge of her mind. The TV buzzed in the background, Dieter Bravo’s voice filling the small apartment with a familiar rasp. A half-eaten carton of ice cream sat beside her, its contents softening to a puddle as she mindlessly scooped the melting mess.
Hunger Strike was playing again. She’d lost count of how many times she’d watched it by now. Dieter’s performance was the kind that stuck with you, the kind that won awards. It wasn’t just a movie anymore; it was the movie that had put him on the map—had made him a star and earned him that Oscar. She didn’t care if everyone else had moved on to the next blockbuster; for her, Hunger Strike was it. Every look in his eyes, every rasp of desperation in his voice felt real, almost too real. It was like he wasn’t acting at all.
"We don’t need them. They need us!" His character was yelling now, his voice hoarse, raw with intensity. She could practically feel his pain, his determination radiating through the screen.
She wiped at her eyes, even though she wasn’t sure why. Maybe it was everything—her life, the rejection, the eviction notice looming like a ticking time bomb. Or maybe it was just Dieter. Watching him made her feel seen, like somehow, through all the chaos, someone else understood what it was like to be on the edge.
The credits rolled on Hunger Strike, but instead of turning off the TV, she did what any fan would—she went down the rabbit hole. The screen filled with suggested videos, interviews, and, of course, the latest tabloid scandals. Dieter Bravo was all over the place lately. She had seen the headlines—everyone had. It was impossible to ignore him, even if you tried.
She grabbed her phone and scrolled through Twitter, where his name was trending yet again.
"Dieter Bravo's Latest Scandal: Sex Tape with Male Assistant Exposed!"
"Gender Identity Crisis or Another Stunt? Dieter Bravo Caught in Love Triangle with Married PA!"
"Oscar-Winning Actor, Homewrecker? Dieter Bravo Linked to Personal Assistant's Broken Marriage!"
She exhaled sharply, half-amused, half in disbelief. Every few months, it seemed, something like this would pop up—another scandal, another explosion in the media circus surrounding him. But this one? A sex tape? With his male personal assistant, who was married to a woman?
It was outrageous. It was chaotic. It was exactly what you'd expect from Dieter Bravo.
How does one even make this shit up? she thought, as she tapped one of the articles. The details were just as wild as the headlines. Apparently, the PA was a guy named James, and he’d been with Dieter for years—right up until last week, when everything blew up.
An article excerpt says: "Sources say that the sex tape in question was filmed during a drug-fueled party at Dieter’s mansion. It shows intimate moments between the actor and his assistant, James, who is reportedly married to a woman. James has since left Dieter’s employment amid the scandal, and insiders claim the actor is ‘unapologetic’ about the affair. This is just the latest in a long string of public meltdowns for the once-revered actor. Dieter Bravo’s chaotic lifestyle has led many to question his mental stability and even his gender identity, as he continues to defy traditional labels."
She snorted, shaking her head. “Unapologetic? That sounds about right.”
It wasn’t that she supported his reckless behavior, but there was something about Dieter that always seemed to push boundaries in every direction. He lived like a car crash happening in slow motion, and yet, people couldn’t look away. The scandals, the chaos—they were just part of his public persona. But there was more to him than that.
She clicked on an older interview from the Cliff Beasts 6 press tour. That was the movie where everything started to unravel for him. The film was supposed to be a big comeback, but instead, it had exposed the man behind the Oscar-winning actor—drugs, sex, alcohol, and a level of unpredictability that no one in Hollywood could quite handle.
Interviewer: “Dieter, after your incredible performance in Hunger Strike, people expected another award-winning role in Cliff Beasts 6, but... that’s not what happened. Can you talk about what went wrong?”
Dieter Bravo (slouching, visibly tired): “Cliff Beasts 6... yeah, man, that was a mess. But, like, it was supposed to be a mess, wasn’t it? I mean, we were trapped in that goddamn bubble for months longer than planned, and by the end, it wasn’t even a movie anymore. It was survival.” He laughed, a rough, bitter sound. “I overdosed on camera, for fuck’s sake. People thought it was part of the documentary. Maybe it should’ve been.”
Interviewer: “So, the extended shoot during the pandemic—did that affect the film’s outcome?”
Dieter (rubbing his temples, shaking his head): “Affect it? It was the outcome. By the time we got to month six, no one gave a shit about the movie anymore. It was just about getting out of there alive. People wanted me to deliver some award-winning performance? Dude, I was barely holding it together. I mean, look at the film—Cliff Beasts was never about art. By the sixth one, it was just... noise. Star-studded, CGI-filled noise. People expected something big, but I gave them a disaster. Maybe that’s what it needed to be.”
Interviewer: “The overdose incident—was that something planned for the documentary, or did things just... get out of control?”
Dieter Bravo (smirking, then shrugging): “Planned? Nah, man, nothing was planned by then. I mean, the cameras were always rolling, right? So when I went down... they just kept filming. Thought it’d make for good behind-the-scenes footage or something. But that’s Hollywood for you.” He paused, letting the weight of it sink in before adding, “People don’t care if you’re falling apart. They just want to know if it’ll sell.”
Interviewer: “That’s pretty heavy. Do you think Cliff Beasts 6 was the start of your... well, decline? It’s no secret you’ve had a rough few years since.”
Dieter Bravo (lighting a cigarette, ignoring the studio's no-smoking policy): “Decline? Maybe. I dunno. I think people were already looking for a reason to tear me apart. Cliff Beasts just made it easier. It wasn’t the overdose that got people talking, it was the fact that it happened while I was making a movie no one cared about anymore. The sixth installment, man. By that point, the franchise was running on fumes, and so was I. But people love a good downfall, right? They see someone on top, and they wait for you to crash. They’ll stick a camera in your face and call it a documentary when really, it’s just a freak show.”
She paused the video, the cigarette smoke still curling from Dieter’s lips frozen on the screen. The words hung in the air, heavy and raw. It was no wonder the media loved to tear him apart; they were practically fed the narrative on a silver platter. His whole life had become the entertainment industry’s favorite sideshow.
She stared at the screen for a few more moments, Dieter’s face frozen in that half-smirk, half-exhausted expression. He was unraveling, and everyone was watching. Cliff Beasts 6 might have been the breaking point, but it wasn’t the cause. No, Dieter had been falling apart long before that.
In a different world, she imagined, she and Dieter could be friends. He’d probably laugh at the mess she just made, tell her not to sweat it. In another life, maybe they’d meet over coffee or work on some crazy indie project together. They’d both be swimming in their own chaos, but maybe that’s what would make their friendship work.
She wasn’t delusional; she knew Dieter Bravo was a celebrity—someone she would probably never meet, never know beyond the screen. But sometimes, when he said things like that, it felt like he was speaking directly to her. Like maybe, in some other life, they’d get along. They’d get each other.
Her eyes drifted down to the eviction notice sitting on the coffee table. Four weeks, it said. Four weeks to come up with the rent, or she’d be out on the street. It was hard to feel hopeful when every option felt like a dead end. And yet, watching Dieter talk about his own collapse, she didn’t feel so alone.
Her phone buzzed on the cushion beside her.
She ignored it at first, assuming it was just another bill reminder. But when she glanced at the screen, her breath caught.
Studio Callback - Screenwriting Internship.
Her heart stopped. A callback? After all this time?
Without thinking, she sat up too fast, the ice cream carton tipping over the edge of the couch and spilling melted chocolate onto the floor. “Shit!” she cursed, grabbing a towel and wiping at the sticky mess with quick, frustrated swipes.
It felt surreal. She had applied for that screenwriting internship months ago and had long since written it off as a missed opportunity. But here it was—another chance.
She stood there, towel in one hand, her phone in the other, staring at the message like it might disappear if she blinked. Four weeks until eviction, a job that barely covered her bills, and now, out of nowhere, this lifeline.
Her eyes flicked back to the TV, where Dieter’s face still stared back at her.
She picked up her phone and, without hesitating, replied to the message. Yes. I’ll be there.
The next day…
The waiting room buzzed with the same dreary energy it had since she’d arrived nearly an hour ago. Grey walls, uncomfortable chairs, and that humming fluorescent light that seemed to buzz directly into her brain. She sat on the edge of her seat, fingers tracing the spine of her portfolio, glancing at the door every time it swung open.
But this time, it wasn’t her turn.
It was him.
Dieter Bravo stormed into the room like a hurricane, sunglasses still perched on his face even though the room was dim, his hair a chaotic mess, like he’d just rolled out of bed—or maybe stumbled out of a party. His team trailed behind him, all looking frazzled and overworked. He barely acknowledged them as he flopped into a chair across from her with a sigh that seemed to carry the weight of the world.
“Well, this is bullshit,” he muttered, crossing his arms. “I’m a goddamn Oscar winner, and they’ve got me sitting in this dump of a waiting room like I’m some extra on a low-budget indie film.”
She bit her lip, trying to hide her amusement. She knew who Dieter Bravo was the second he’d walked in—who didn’t? His face had been plastered on every tabloid for weeks. But there was something surreal about seeing him up close, in the flesh, like he’d been plucked straight from her TV screen. Don’t freak out, she told herself. He’s just a person.
Still, the excitement bubbled up inside her, and for a moment, she just stared at him, feeling the shock wear off.
He caught her staring. “What? You think this is funny?”
She blinked, pulling herself together, giving him a deadpan look. “I think you’re acting like someone who’s forgotten what a waiting room is.”
Dieter raised an eyebrow, his mouth twitching like he wasn’t sure whether to be offended or intrigued. “And you are?”
She shrugged. “Someone who’s been sitting here for an hour. Pretty sure I’m about to merge with this chair if they don’t call me soon.”
Dieter snorted, sitting up a little straighter, like he wasn’t used to people talking to him like that. Not outside his circle, at least. “An hour, huh? That’s it? Try six months trapped in a COVID bubble filming Cliff Beasts 6. That’s real torture.”
She laughed softly. “Yeah, I saw that movie. Pretty sure it was a crime against humanity.”
He cracked a grin. “Hey, that movie’s still paying my rent.”
“Is it? Seems like you should be able to afford better waiting rooms, then.”
Dieter leaned back in his chair, adjusting his sunglasses even though they weren’t needed. “Touché.”
There was a pause, a silence between them that felt more comfortable than awkward. They were sizing each other up, like two kids sitting next to each other on a school bus, deciding if they wanted to be friends.
“So,” Dieter said, shifting his gaze toward her again. “What are you here for? You in trouble, too?”
She smirked. “I’m always in trouble.”
He raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. “Yeah, well, me too.” He ran a hand through his messy hair, looking around the room as if just noticing how drab it was. “You work here or something?”
She shrugged. “Depends if they think I’m good enough to work here.”
“Good enough for what?”
“I’m a writer,” she said, half-smiling, but there was a vulnerability in her voice. “Or at least I’m trying to be.”
Dieter’s eyes lit up with genuine curiosity, which caught her off guard. “A writer, huh? You got anything out there I’ve seen?”
She snorted, shaking her head. “Only if you read stuff on Medium and Tumblr.”
Dieter laughed, the sound deep and unexpected, like he wasn’t used to laughing like that. “Tumblr, huh? So you’re a real writer.” He gave her a playful look. “What do you write? Fanfiction about guys like me?”
She rolled her eyes, but there was a teasing glint in her gaze. “Nope. But if I did, it’d be better than that train wreck you called Cliff Beasts 6.”
Dieter clutched his chest dramatically. “Ouch. Right in the ego.”
She smirked. “Ego as big as yours can take it.”
For a second, he just stared at her, genuinely caught off guard. He wasn’t used to people talking to him like this—like he was normal, not some Oscar-winning disaster wrapped in a scandal. She didn’t seem to care who he was or how many headlines he’d been in. It was refreshing, and he found himself more interested in her than he had been in anyone outside his usual crowd in a long time.
“So what do you do?” she asked casually, keeping the banter going.
Dieter laughed, a full, deep sound that made him look younger than he usually did in the tabloids. “What do I do? I’m a professional disaster. You haven’t heard?”
She chuckled, nodding toward the door. “I think you’re better at it than you are at acting.”
Dieter looked at her for a beat, his mouth twitching into a smirk. “You know, I don’t get a lot of people talking to me like this. Most people, they want to kiss ass or they just want something from me.”
She shrugged, her eyes flicking up to meet his. “What can I say? I’m not most people.”
He leaned forward, intrigued. “You like books?”
She raised an eyebrow. “What kind of books?”
“The kind that make people uncomfortable.”
Her lips twitched into a smile. “I see you’ve read Camus.”
He grinned. “The Stranger. Ever read it?”
“I did. Twice. Though I’m more of a Kafka fan.” She paused for a beat, her voice deadpan. “I like my existentialism served with a side of why is everything a nightmare and also I’m a bug.”
Dieter laughed again, clearly impressed. “You’re alright, you know that?”
“You’re not so bad yourself,” she said, her tone casual, but inside, she couldn’t quite believe she was having this conversation. With Dieter Bravo. Of all people.
They stared at each other, neither blinking, as if trying to see who’d crack first. But before either could say anything more, the door opened again.
“Mr. Bravo?” A frazzled assistant appeared in the doorway, eyes wide as they motioned for him to come in. “We’re ready for you.”
Dieter groaned dramatically, rolling his eyes as he stood up. “Finally.” He paused, turning to her with a smirk. “Don’t go anywhere, book lover. We’re not done with this conversation.”
She gave him a small smile, though inwardly she rolled her eyes. Yeah, sure. Like you'd remember me in two minutes, she thought. Dieter was famous for being distracted, for forgetting people as soon as he turned a corner. Everyone knew about his ADD—it was practically part of his public persona. He’d probably forget her name before the door even shut behind him.
Inside the meeting room…
Dieter slouched into a chair, his eyes flicking toward the group of studio executives sitting across from him, all with tight-lipped expressions. They weren’t here to chit-chat. They were here to clean up his mess. Again.
“Alright, what’s the damage?” Dieter asked, tapping his fingers on the arm of the chair.
One of the executives, a tall man with silver hair and an expensive-looking suit, sighed heavily. “We’ve already settled with James and his wife. They’ve agreed not to divorce, but we’re paying for damages—and couples therapy.”
Dieter raised an eyebrow. “Couples therapy? Really?”
The man didn’t blink. “Yes, Dieter. Really.”
The room was thick with tension, the kind that only came when the stakes were sky-high. Another executive chimed in. “The headlines are out of control. We need to distance you from this. Fast.”
“What do you want me to do? Apologize? I already said I was sorry.” Dieter’s voice was tired, edged with sarcasm, but underneath, there was a flicker of frustration.
The silver-haired executive leaned forward. “Dieter, this isn’t about a simple apology. You’ve gone beyond that. Your lifestyle—this hedonistic, Roman emperor routine you’ve got going on—it’s not just damaging your reputation. It’s hurting us. The studio. The people you’re supposed to be representing.”
Dieter blinked, caught off guard by the harshness in the man’s tone.
“We’ve invested millions in you,” the executive continued, “and right now, you’re a liability. There’s talk of ending your contract early. Cutting ties before you bring the whole house down.”
Dieter’s jaw tightened. “You’re kidding, right?”
“No,” the man said coldly. “I’m not.”
For a moment, Dieter just sat there, staring at the man, trying to process what he was hearing. They were serious. He was this close to losing everything.
Another voice chimed in—his publicist, trying to smooth things over. “We’re not saying it’s over, Dieter. But we need to fix this. Charities. Positive press. You need to lay low for a while.”
The executive nodded. “No public appearances, no parties. We’re going to find some charity work for you, get the public to see a new side of you. You’re going to disappear for a bit. When you come back, you’ll be better. Clean. Understood?”
Dieter clenched his fists, the frustration boiling beneath the surface. “Yeah, sure. Whatever you need.”
“And we’ll get you a new PA,” his publicist added. “Someone who can keep you grounded. Keep you out of trouble, hopefully, someone you could not fuck.”
Dieter waved them off, already bored with the conversation. His mind drifted back to the waiting room, to the girl sitting across from him, trading quips like they were old friends. At least she’s interesting, he thought.
Back in the waiting room…
She sat there, slumped in her chair, staring blankly at the wall. The interview hadn’t gone well. She hadn’t gotten the job. The casting director had been polite but distant, and she could tell by their expression that they already had someone else in mind. Her stomach twisted with disappointment.
No extra job. No extra paycheck. And no way to make rent by the end of the month.
She stared down at her portfolio, feeling the weight of her failure settle in. She’d have to start packing soon. Maybe call her mom, tell her she was coming home. She could already imagine the conversation.
“We told you so,” her mom would say. “You should’ve gone into nursing. Writing was never going to pay the bills.”
Her stepdad would nod in agreement, disappointed but unsurprised. “Creative writing? Really?” he’d say. “What did you think would happen?”
She swallowed the lump in her throat, trying not to think about it. But the thoughts kept coming, relentless. She’d have to pack up, move back home, admit defeat.
God, I’m such a screw-up.
The door creaked open, and Dieter stepped out, glancing around. His entourage had already disappeared down the hall, leaving him standing alone for once. He spotted her instantly.
“Still here?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
She forced a small smile, shrugging. “Didn’t get the job.”
Dieter nodded, slipping his hands into his pockets. “Yeah, well... my meeting sucked too. They’ve decided I’m officially the next Caligula.”
She snorted. “That bad?”
“Worse,” he said, shaking his head. He stood there for a beat, looking around the room, then back at her. “You know what? Screw this. Let’s go grab a drink.”
She blinked, surprised. “What?”
“I’m serious,” Dieter said, eyes glinting with that familiar mix of mischief and exhaustion. “I need a drink. You’re funny. Let’s go.”
She stared at him, unsure if he was joking or not. But he wasn’t. She could see it in his eyes—he was serious.
“You buying?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.
Dieter grinned. “I’m an Oscar winner. Drinks are always on me.”
She hesitated for a moment, then slowly stood up, tucking her portfolio under her arm. “Alright, Bravo. Let’s see if you can keep up.”
He smirked, leading the way. “Baby, you don’t know who you’re talking to.”
The black Audi’s engine purred as Dieter navigated the dim streets, his phone vibrating endlessly in the cupholder. Text after text, call after call—all from his team. They were probably losing their minds, wondering where he’d disappeared to. He glanced at the notifications, scoffing, and shoved the phone further out of reach.
“So,” she said, glancing at him from the passenger seat, “do you do this often?”
Dieter smirked, keeping his eyes on the road. “Do what?”
“Pick up random strangers and ask them to grab drinks with you.”
He laughed, the sound low and lazy. “No, I mean, I pick up random strangers... just not usually for drinks.”
She chuckled. “Well, you should probably get better at vetting your strangers. I could be a serial killer, you know.”
Dieter shot her a quick glance, grinning. “Even better. Might actually enjoy being murdered by you.”
She snorted, shaking her head. “You really are a disaster, aren’t you?”
“Disaster, masochist, artist... depends on the day.” He glanced over at her, eyes twinkling with mischief. “You’ve got a hell of a sense of humor, though. I like it.”
“And here I thought you were the sadist for thinking being murdered sounds fun.”
“Nope.” Dieter grinned. “Definitely a masochist. But don’t let that scare you off.”
She smirked, leaning back in her seat. “Too late. I’m terrified now.”
They drove in comfortable silence for a while, the city lights flickering through the tinted windows, casting shadows on Dieter’s face. It felt surreal, sitting in the passenger seat of Dieter Bravo’s car, heading to God-knows-where. But she didn’t feel uneasy. In fact, she felt strangely comfortable. It was weird how easily they’d fallen into this rhythm, like they’d known each other for years.
“So,” she asked, breaking the silence, “where exactly are we getting these drinks?”
Dieter’s smirk grew as he pulled into a parking garage, winding his way up to the fifth floor. “Here.”
“Here?” she echoed, raising an eyebrow.
Dieter parked the car, and without another word, led her to the elevator. When the doors slid open, she was met with the sleek interior of his penthouse. Glass walls, dark furniture, and a view of the city that stretched on forever.
“Oh,” she said, stepping inside, taking it all in. “I thought we were going to a bar or something.”
Dieter chuckled, locking the door behind them. “Yeah, well, I’ve been told not to be seen in public too much for a while. You know... the whole ‘clean up the image’ thing.”
She turned, leaning against the counter, a smirk tugging at her lips. “Right. The scandal.”
He shrugged. “Yeah, that.”
She tilted her head, a playful glint in her eyes. “So, should I be worried now? You could be the serial killer. I didn’t tell anyone where I’m going.”
Dieter grinned, moving toward the bar in the corner of the room. “Well, if I am, at least you’ll die with a good drink in your hand.”
Dieter’s penthouse bar looked like it had been pulled straight out of a high-end hotel. Polished wood, rows of bottles perfectly lined up, and a set of cocktail tools that would make any bartender proud.
He moved behind the bar with a familiar ease, pulling out a few bottles and setting them on the counter. “What’s your poison?”
“Vodka, Negroni... surprise me.”
“You got it.” He started mixing, moving around the bar like he’d done it a thousand times. She followed suit, sliding behind the bar beside him, the space between them feeling natural.
As they worked, they fell into a rhythm, like two old friends who’d done this countless times before. It was easy, the way they passed bottles back and forth, the clink of ice in glasses punctuating their conversation.
“So,” she said, shaking her drink, “you always this smooth with your guests, or am I special?”
Dieter smirked. “You’re special. I don’t let just anyone behind the bar.” He watched her expertly pour out the drink, nodding in approval. “You’ve got skills.”
She chuckled. “I bartend. Well, I used to, now I just work at a diner, but it counts.”
He laughed. “I used to bartend, too. Before all this.” He gestured vaguely to his sprawling penthouse. “I kinda miss it.”
“Miss what? Making drinks for drunk people at 2 a.m.?”
He shook his head, grinning. “No, the simplicity of it. The quiet moments before the rush. And, I guess, the people. You get to talk to all kinds of weirdos.”
She handed him the cocktail she’d just mixed, and he took a sip, his eyebrows raising in surprise. “Not bad. Actually, really good.”
She smiled, taking a sip of his creation in return. “Yours isn’t half bad either, weirdo.”
He snorted as he finished drinking, “Looks like we’ve both still got it.”
They clinked their glasses, a quiet laugh shared between them.
They moved to the couches near the window, drinks in hand, and the night outside stretched on in glittering silence. It was one of those rare moments when the city was alive, but they were in their own little world, insulated by glass and a few too many drinks.
She stretched out on the couch, swirling the last of her drink in the glass. “So, this is what it’s like, huh? Being Dieter Bravo. A penthouse with a killer view and a bar that puts most cocktail lounges to shame.”
Dieter leaned back, grinning. “You sound impressed.”
She tilted her head. “I mean, it’s nice. But I’m not that impressed.”
He snorted. “Figures. I’ve gotta work harder to impress you, huh?”
“You said it, not me.”
There was a beat of silence before he broke it. “So, what’s the story? Why’re you still working at a diner when you’re clearly way too smart for that?”
She shrugged, taking a sip. “You make it sound like I had a choice. You think I want to be a waitress?”
“No, but...” He trailed off, clearly thinking. “I don’t know. You strike me as someone who should be... doing more.”
She arched an eyebrow. “More, like what? Writing fanfiction for Cliff Beasts 7?”
Dieter laughed, the sound filling the space. “God, no. Please, spare me.”
She grinned. “It’s not for lack of trying. I just... haven’t found my place yet. It’s not as easy as, ‘Hey, I’m talented, someone notice me.’” She shook her head, her voice growing quieter. “It’s a lot of failing. Mostly failing.”
Dieter nodded, leaning back in his seat, his expression more serious now. “I get that.”
“Do you?” she asked, her voice softer but still edged with sarcasm. “Because from where I’m sitting, you’re pretty damn successful.”
Dieter looked at her, really looked at her this time. “You think success means you stop failing?”
She didn’t answer, watching him with curiosity.
He set his drink down and ran a hand through his hair. “You fail more when you’re successful. Trust me. People are just waiting for you to screw up. And when you do... they’re there to watch you burn.”
“You’re talking about the scandal.”
He nodded, taking another sip. “It’s not just the scandal. It’s everything. There’s always someone out there with a camera, waiting for you to mess up. They don’t care about what you do right. Just the crash.”
“So you’re saying you’re a slow-motion car crash?” she asked, her tone dry.
He smirked, nodding. “Exactly. A car crash people pay to watch.”
She stared at him for a moment, her mind working through his words. “That’s... kind of tragic.”
Dieter raised an eyebrow, his grin fading. “It is, isn’t it?”
They both went quiet, the weight of his words settling between them. But then she leaned forward, her eyes narrowing playfully. “You ever think about, I don’t know... getting out of the car? Stopping the crash?”
He barked a laugh, shaking his head. “And do what? Go back to bartending? Give up the Oscar for a shaker and ice?”
“Maybe.” She shrugged, her voice light but serious underneath. “Or maybe just... do something real. Something that’s not about everyone else’s expectations.”
Dieter looked at her for a long moment, something in his expression shifting, like he was seeing her in a new light. “You really believe that, don’t you?”
She nodded. “I do. Look, I might not be some hotshot writer, but I’ve always believed that what matters is the stuff that’s real. The art you make when no one’s watching. The stuff people don’t get to tear apart.”
“Yeah, but the problem is, everyone’s watching.”
She leaned back, crossing her arms. “So maybe that’s their problem.”
Dieter laughed, and this time it wasn’t the careless, guarded kind of laugh he usually gave. It was genuine. “You’ve got a point.”
“Of course I do. I’m always right.”
“Okay, Camus,” he teased, rolling his eyes. “You’re officially hired as my life coach.”
She leaned back, eyes glinting with mischief. “I don’t know if you could afford me.”
Dieter snorted, swirling his drink. “How expensive are you?” he asked, playful but intrigued.
She paused, pretending to consider it for a moment. “Depends… do you personally know Gérard Depardieu?”
Dieter grimaced, raising an eyebrow as he took another sip. “Gérard Depardieu?” He repeated, blinking in confusion.
She nodded, downing the rest of her drink in two big gulps, the alcohol warming her throat. “What? You don’t know him?”
“I mean, I do, but wow...” He let out a low whistle, shaking his head with a chuckle. “That’s a... pretty weird choice.”
“Well, what can I say? I like them like that.” She shrugged, her expression completely serious as she set her glass down.
Dieter threw his head back, laughing harder than he had all night. It was loud, unfiltered, and completely genuine, the kind of laugh that came when he wasn’t performing for anyone.
“You’re a trip, you know that?” he said, still grinning as he wiped at his eyes. “Gérard Depardieu. Damn. Haven’t thought about that guy in years.”
She raised an eyebrow. “What, are you saying you don’t have weird celebrity crushes?”
He tilted his head, considering the question for a second. “I mean... I am the weird celebrity crush.”
She rolled her eyes, but a smirk tugged at her lips. “How humble of you.”
“Hey, I’m just saying,” he replied, taking a sip of his drink. “You should hear the shit people say about me online. I’ve been everything from someone’s ‘gay awakening’ to someone’s inappropriate uncle.”
She snorted into her drink, barely containing her laughter. “Jesus. People are wild.”
Dieter smirked, leaning forward with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “So, c’mon. Who else you got? Who’s on your weird celebrity crush list? Lay it on me.”
She took a slow sip of her drink, savoring the moment, then said with a completely straight face, “Willem Dafoe.”
Dieter almost choked on his drink, eyes widening in disbelief as he stared at her like she’d just told him she was into cryptids. “Dafoe? Willem Dafoe?”
“Yeah,” she said, completely deadpan. “What’s wrong with Dafoe?”
He blinked, still recovering from nearly spitting his drink out. “I mean, nothing’s wrong with him, but... wow, that’s... unexpected.”
She shrugged, taking another sip of her drink. “I already shocked you with Depardieu. What were you expecting? Besides, Dafoe... he’s got range.” She gave him a wicked grin and added, “Plus, you know he’s freaky in bed.”
Dieter let out a loud bark of laughter, nearly doubling over. “Holy shit... you’re a freak. A true freak.”
She raised an eyebrow, her smirk widening. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
“Oh no, it’s definitely not a bad thing,” he said, still chuckling as he reached over to refill her glass. “I’ve met some freaks in my time, but this? This is different. I like it.”
She eyed the freshly poured drink, tilting her head. “Not sure if I should feel good about that comment.”
Dieter grinned, clinking his glass against hers. “You should. Trust me.”
They both chuckled, the easy, playful energy between them lightening the mood even more. But then Dieter leaned back, giving her an amused look. “You know, I actually know Willem.”
Her eyes widened, her curiosity piqued. “No way. You know him?”
Dieter nodded, taking a slow sip. “Yeah. Great guy. Not as intense as his characters would make you think. Really down to earth. Freaky in his own way, sure, but... I get it. I guess I see what you see in him.”
She smiled, leaning back. “Well, that’s comforting.”
Then she paused, glancing down at her drink before adding, “I actually met him once. Worked as an assistant on a theater production he starred in a couple of years ago.”
Dieter’s eyes lit up. “No way. Seriously?”
“Yeah, seriously,” she said, nodding. “It was this small indie thing in New York. I wasn’t his assistant or anything, just part of the general crew, but I did get to work around him a bit. He’s... different, in a good way.”
Dieter leaned forward, intrigued. “Okay, now you’ve really got my attention. You’ve done PA work before?”
She shook her head, swirling the ice in her glass. “Not really. That was more of a part-time gig while I was in school. I applied for a real PA job a few years back, but it didn’t exactly go well.”
Dieter’s brow furrowed. “What happened?”
She sighed, her smirk fading as she stared down at her drink. “Well, I got all the way through the interviews, and then the celebrity—someone old-school—told me I was too chubby to work for them. Said I wouldn’t look good in photographs.”
Dieter’s face immediately twisted into a mix of shock and disgust. “Wait, what? Are you kidding me?”
“Nope,” she said, the bitterness in her voice barely masked by the nonchalance she was trying to project. “I didn’t even bother applying for PA jobs after that. Figured it wasn’t worth the hassle.”
Dieter shook his head, clearly appalled. “That’s... Jesus. I mean, I get that people in this industry are eccentric as hell, but that’s way too much. Who the hell cares what you look like in photos? You’re supposed to be doing a job, not starring in the damn pictures.”
She shrugged, a small, sad smile tugging at her lips. “Yeah, well, some people care. Guess I wasn’t the image they wanted.”
Dieter looked at her, his expression softening with empathy. “That’s seriously messed up. I’m sorry you went through that.”
She waved him off, smiling more genuinely this time. “It’s fine. Honestly, it was a while ago. I just stuck to writing and waitressing after that.”
“Well, for what it’s worth,” Dieter said, leaning forward, “that guy was a complete idiot. You’d make a damn good PA.”
She laughed softly, shaking her head. “Thanks. But I think I’m done with that world.”
Dieter studied her for a moment, then raised his glass in a small toast. “Well, here’s to not being the kind of asshole who judges people by how they look in photos.”
She clinked her glass against his, smiling again. “I’ll drink to that.”
The conversation lingered in the air after their laughter died down, a comfortable silence settling over them. She leaned back against the couch, her gaze drifting to the massive windows overlooking the city, the skyline glittering like a distant dream.
“Gotta say,” she began, her voice soft but still playful, “this penthouse is... something else. It’s almost too perfect, though. Feels more like a set than a home.”
Dieter glanced around the room, smirking faintly. “Yeah, that’s because it’s not home.”
She raised an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. “It’s not?”
He shook his head, swirling the last of his drink. “Nah. It’s just a place I own. I use it for... all the shit you probably hear about in the tabloids.”
She snorted, leaning in. “You mean the orgies and sex scandals?”
“Pretty much.” Dieter chuckled, but there was something more behind the laughter. His expression softened as he set the glass down on the table. “It’s not where I live. My real home is out in Sherman Oaks.”
She tilted her head, surprised. “Sherman Oaks?”
“Yeah,” he said, his voice quieter now. “It’s an actual house. Big, built for a family, but too large for just me. I don’t bring anyone there. Not my... conquests, not my parties. Just me. I paint there, you know? I’ve got this studio in the back, and when the world gets too loud, that’s where I go. It’s the only place I feel... I don’t know, settled.”
Her eyes softened as she listened. She hadn’t expected this level of honesty from him, but the vulnerability in his voice was unmistakable. “That sounds... nice, actually. Quiet.”
“It is,” he agreed, his gaze distant, as if he could picture the house in his mind. “But the silence can get too loud sometimes. Especially now that I’m older. That’s when I come back here. The penthouse. To drown it out.”
She frowned slightly, her fingers tracing the edge of her glass. “The silence?”
Dieter nodded, exhaling softly. “Yeah. You wouldn’t think silence could be so damn loud, but it is. Especially when you’re used to everything being... chaotic.”
She didn’t respond immediately, just watched him, the weight of his words sinking in. There was a loneliness there, one that no amount of parties, conquests, or tabloid headlines could fill. It wasn’t just about being alone—it was about being seen. About finding a place where the chaos didn’t define him.
She took a breath, her tone gentle but sure. “You don’t strike me as someone who likes the noise. Not really.”
Dieter blinked, turning his gaze back to her. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, people see the chaos, the headlines, the scandals. But I don’t think that’s really you.” She paused, her voice steady. “You’ve got a whole world inside you that no one bothers to look at. You’re not just the guy who parties and ends up in the tabloids. You’re more than that.”
His eyes flickered with something—surprise, maybe, or recognition. He opened his mouth to say something, but she continued before he could.
“They don’t see the parts of you that matter. The parts that create, that make something out of all this mess. The fact that you’ve got a studio and you paint—that tells me a lot. You’re more than just an actor, Dieter. You’re an artist. And not because you say so, but because you are.”
For a moment, Dieter just stared at her, as if her words had landed somewhere deeper than he’d expected. She was looking at him like no one had in years. Not like a star, not like the scandalized mess the world saw. She saw him. The real him.
His throat tightened, and suddenly, the air felt heavier. “You really think that?”
“I know it,” she replied, her tone matter-of-fact. “You’re not just memorizing lines. You’re putting something into the world that most people don’t even take the time to understand. But that doesn’t mean it’s not real. It’s real, Dieter. And it matters.”
He blinked, the familiar burn of tears stinging behind his eyes. It was strange—he hadn’t felt this exposed in so long. The vulnerability, the rawness of being seen for more than just the surface.
A tear slipped down his cheek, slow and steady. He swiped at it quickly, but another followed. It wasn’t a sobbing mess, no dramatic breakdown. Just a quiet release, like the weight of everything he’d been carrying finally had somewhere to go.
“Damn,” he muttered, laughing softly through the tears. “You’re really messing me up here.”
She smiled, nudging him gently with her elbow. “You needed to hear it.”
He wiped his eyes, still grinning despite the tears. “Guess I did.”
For a long moment, neither of them said anything. The silence between them wasn’t heavy or awkward. It was comfortable, filled with an understanding that went deeper than words. In the quiet of the penthouse, with the city lights twinkling in the background, Dieter felt something he hadn’t in a long time.
Peace.
But of course, Dieter couldn’t let the moment just sit there. He leaned over slightly, raising an eyebrow as a mischievous grin spread across his face. “So... is this the part where we kiss?”
She burst out laughing, her head falling back as she clutched her sides. “Oh my God, Dieter, you’re such an ass.”
For the first time in a long time, Dieter didn’t feel even a twinge of offense at being laughed at. In fact, her reaction made him laugh, too—a deep, real laugh that didn’t feel performative. It was just them, laughing like idiots in the middle of a moment that could’ve been serious, but wasn’t.
He shrugged, grinning. “Hey, had to shoot my shot.”
She shook her head, still giggling as she nudged him. “You’re impossible.”
“Yeah, but you like me,” he teased.
“Debatable,” she shot back, smirking. “But that was not the move, Bravo.”
He threw his hands up in mock surrender, still laughing. “Alright, alright, no kiss. Got it.”
She rolled her eyes, the amusement still lingering in her expression. “Seriously, though. You’re an ass.”
“Yeah, I’ve heard that before,” Dieter said, smirking. But beneath the joking, there was a warmth in his eyes, a softness that hadn’t been there before. He liked this—being around someone who could take his nonsense and throw it right back at him, without missing a beat.
They had been hanging out for days—Dieter laying low like his team had asked, and her finding herself more and more wrapped up in his world. It was easy with him. The lazy mornings that bled into afternoons, the spontaneous outings, the hours spent talking about nothing and everything. It was like living in a bubble, where the real world and all its mess didn’t exist.
But it couldn’t last forever.
They were lounging in his penthouse, another aimless afternoon with the TV buzzing in the background, both of them lost in their own thoughts.
“So,” Dieter began, his tone casual, but there was an edge of hesitation in it. “I’ve been thinking...”
She looked over at him, raising an eyebrow. “Uh-oh. That sounds dangerous.”
He chuckled, but there was a nervousness in his smile. “No, I mean... I’ve been thinking about you. Us, I guess.”
She frowned slightly, sitting up a bit straighter. “What do you mean?”
He rubbed the back of his neck, avoiding her gaze for a moment. “I think I... I really like you. And I want to stay friends, you know? If you’re cool with it.”
Her heart skipped a beat, and she didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Of course he liked her—they got along too well not to. But she knew what had to happen next.
She swallowed hard, forcing a smile. “I don’t think we can keep doing this.”
Dieter’s face fell, his brow furrowing in confusion. “Wait, what? Why not?”
“I can’t afford to stay in LA anymore,” she said, her voice quieter now. “I’m going home. To my mom’s and stepdad’s. The diner job just doesn’t cover rent or utilities, and figuring things out in this city isn’t really feasible for me right now.”
Dieter stared at her, the words slowly sinking in. His expression shifted from confusion to something deeper—sadness, maybe even panic. “You’re... leaving?”
She nodded, trying to keep it together. “Yeah. I’ve got no choice.”
For a moment, he didn’t say anything, just looked at her like she’d just ripped the floor out from under him. Then, true to form, Dieter went into full dramatic mode.
“Are you serious?” he groaned, throwing his head back dramatically. “This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me. Like, ever.”
She laughed, despite herself. “Dieter, stop.”
“No, seriously,” he continued, flopping onto the couch like a petulant child. “You’re leaving me to fend for myself in this godforsaken city, and for what? Your mom’s house in the middle of nowhere? This is cruel and unusual punishment.”
She rolled her eyes, amused but touched by how much this seemed to affect him. “You’re being ridiculous.”
“Where’s your loyalty?” he muttered dramatically. “I thought we were in this together.”
She snorted. “I didn’t realize hanging out with you was a lifelong commitment.”
Dieter sat up suddenly, his eyes lighting up as if he’d just had the greatest idea of all time. “Wait a second...”
She eyed him warily. “What?”
“You still need a job, right?”
Her eyebrow arched. “...Yes?”
“I still need a PA,” he said, the excitement building in his voice. “My team hasn’t found anyone, and let’s face it—they’re probably going to stick me with some lifeless corporate robot.”
She blinked, not expecting this. “Wait, are you offering me a job?”
“Hell yes, I am,” he said, grinning like a kid with a new toy. “You’d be perfect. I mean, you know me. You get me. And you’re already here half the time anyway. Why not make it official?”
She hesitated, her mind racing. “I don’t know, Dieter. It feels like... I don’t know, like you’re just offering it because you feel bad.”
He shook his head, his expression softening. “No, I’m offering it because I need you. And not in a weird way, okay? I mean, yeah, it’s a job, but it’s also more than that. I trust you. And I don’t trust a lot of people.”
She bit her lip, still uncertain. “Yeah, but it comes with a paycheck, right? That’s gonna make me feel... really dirty.”
Dieter laughed, leaning back into the couch. “Oh, come on. It’s a legit offer. And I’m paying you well, so you’ll get used to feeling dirty real quick.”
She chuckled, shaking her head. “You’re impossible.”
“Seriously,” he continued, his tone softening again. “Think about it. It’s not charity. It’s not a handout. I really need your company, and I think you need this too.”
She exhaled, staring at him for a moment. “I’ll... think about it.”
A few days later, she was back at the penthouse, this time with Dieter’s manager, his lawyer, and Dieter himself, all sitting around the sleek kitchen island. It felt surreal.
The manager went over the details of the contract, but it was hard to focus on the specifics when her mind was spinning with how fast everything was happening.
“And, of course,” the manager added sternly, “we have to include the no-fucking clause. If you two get involved, it’s not only grounds for termination but also blacklisting.”
Dieter raised an eyebrow, looking slightly offended. “Seriously? That’s a bit much, isn’t it?”
She snorted, waving it off. “It’s fine, Bravo. I don’t think you’d want to fuck me anyway.”
He frowned, almost hurt. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
The manager chuckled, shaking his head. “He fucks anything that moves.”
She furrowed her brows briefly, her face showing a flash of disgust at the comment, but she kept her mouth shut. This wasn’t the time to start an argument with his team. Still, she couldn’t shake the sour taste the comment left in her mouth.
Dieter noticed her reaction and shot his manager a look, but the moment passed quickly as the lawyer handed her the contract to sign.
Once the papers were signed, it was official. She was now Dieter Bravo’s new assistant.
After the contract signing, they were back in the quiet of the penthouse. She stretched her arms out, feeling a mixture of excitement and disbelief at the day’s events. Dieter leaned against the counter, still processing it all too, and for a moment, the two of them just stood there in silence.
Then she clapped her hands together, breaking the moment. “Okay, Bravo, I’m treating you to dinner.”
Dieter blinked, confusion crossing his face. “Wait, what? You’re treating me?”
She grinned, nodding. “Yeah, to celebrate. You know, new job and all.”
He hesitated, raising an eyebrow. “You just signed a contract. You shouldn’t be spending money on me.”
She waved him off, rolling her eyes. “Take a chill pill. I just landed a sick new job with a really dirty paycheck. I’m excited, let me have this.”
Dieter chuckled, rubbing his neck sheepishly. “I’ve taken way too many pills in my life. Not sure I remember which one the chill pill is.”
She burst out laughing, grabbing her jacket. “Well, then this will be the antidote. C’mon, we’re getting Five Guys.”
Dieter’s grin grew wider, his eyes lighting up. “Damn, baby, you know I can’t say no to Five Guys.”
She shot him a smirk. “Then let’s go.”
They drove in Dieter’s car, windows heavily tinted, cruising through the LA streets as the sun dipped below the skyline. They grabbed their order from the drive-thru window and found an empty parking lot, parking under the dim glow of a streetlight.
Dieter reclined his seat all the way back, pushing the front seats to give them more space to lounge. She did the same, their legs stretched out as they unwrapped their burgers.
“So,” he mumbled around a mouthful of fries, “what now?”
She shrugged, her voice muffled as she stuffed more fries into her mouth. “Idunno.”
They ate in comfortable silence for a moment, the radio playing softly in the background, the quiet hum of the city far off in the distance.
Dieter glanced at her sideways, studying her face. “You seem a little... off.”
She paused mid-chew, looking at him. “What do you mean?”
He shrugged, biting into his burger. “I dunno. Just felt like something’s been bugging you since we left the penthouse.”
She exhaled, setting her burger down, wiping her hands on a napkin. “Well... your manager pissed me off. Big time.”
Dieter stopped chewing, his eyes widening a little. “What? Why?”
“That comment he made,” she said, rolling her eyes, “about you humping everything that moves. It was gross. And unnecessary.”
Dieter’s face reddened, the blush creeping up his neck as he rubbed at it, a little embarrassed. “Yeah, uh... that’s just how he is.”
She raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. “That doesn’t make it okay.”
He chuckled awkwardly, setting his burger down. “I mean, he wasn’t wrong. You’ve heard the stories, read the articles, right?”
She stared at him for a beat, then sighed. She knew he wasn’t trying to defend his manager, and in a way, she found that endearing—his loyalty to people even after everything they’d said about him. All the rumors, the scandals, the affairs. But she tucked that thought away for another time.
“That’s not the point,” she said, shaking her head. “As someone who works with you, the first thing your manager should be doing is protecting you—even from your own team.”
Dieter blinked, her words hitting harder than he expected. He felt something crack open in his chest. She wasn’t wrong. And hearing her say it so plainly made him realize just how much he’d let slide because of loyalty. Because of fear.
He smiled softly, biting into his burger, his voice quiet. “Thanks for saying that.”
She shrugged, offering him a small smile in return. “It’s true.”
Then, with a mischievous glint in her eye, she leaned over, wiggling her eyebrows. “Besides, you haven’t tried to fuck me yet, so I don’t think what your manager said was true.”
Dieter choked on his soda, laughing and coughing at the same time. “Jesus Christ,” he wheezed, shaking his head. “You’re unbelievable.”
She grinned, leaning back into her seat. “What? Am I not fuckable enough for Dieter Bravo?”
He immediately shook his head, his voice firm. “No, baby–you’re...fuck– you’re hot. Like, really hot. And I’m an idiot for not jumping you the second I met you.”
She snorted, clearly amused. “But?”
Dieter sighed, running a hand through his hair, his voice quieter but more grounded now. “Look, if we hadn’t had that first conversation, that night in the waiting room... I probably would’ve tried to sleep with you.”
She gasped dramatically, her eyes widening in mock horror. “Excuse me? What made you think I’d even want to sleep with you?”
Dieter burst out laughing, shaking his head. “Oh, c’mon, I’ve got ways. If I really wanted to, I could have charmed you into it.”
She snorted, shoving another fry into her mouth. “Yeah, right. You can’t charm your way into everyone’s bed, Bravo.”
Dieter stared at her, deadpan, raising an eyebrow. “Uh... yes, I can.”
They both broke into laughter, the moment light but laced with a shared understanding. Once their laughter died down, he leaned back, the humor fading slightly as he spoke again, this time more serious.
“But seriously,” he continued, his voice softer now, “I didn’t want to cross that line with you. Because... you’re different.”
She glanced at him, curious now, the playful energy between them simmering down as he opened up.
“I’m a messy person,” he admitted, his gaze dropping to the steering wheel, fingers idly tracing the edges. “In every sense of the word. My life, my relationships—they don’t end well. And I’ve ruined... too many things that mattered. I can’t ruin this. I won’t.”
She tilted her head, watching him closely. “Why do you think it would ruin things?”
He took a deep breath, the vulnerability flickering in his eyes as he finally met her gaze. “Because when I sleep with someone, I lose track of... what’s real and what’s not. It always starts out fine, but I mess things up. I make it complicated, and then it all falls apart. And I don’t want that to happen with you.”
She studied him for a moment, seeing the weight behind his words, the sincerity he rarely showed to anyone. This wasn’t the over-the-top, scandal-filled Dieter Bravo the world knew. This was a man who was genuinely afraid of ruining something good.
“Wow,” she muttered, trying to break the heaviness. “So you’re saying I was basically a goner if we hadn’t talked that first night?”
He chuckled, giving her a teasing grin. “Oh, absolutely.”
She laughed, shaking her head in disbelief. “You really are full of yourself.”
“No, I’m just honest,” he said with a playful smirk. “But really, I don’t want to just fuck this up. You get me, more than anyone has in a long time. And I don’t want to lose that because I was... impulsive.”
She looked at him for a long moment, their earlier banter giving way to something deeper. It was clear that he meant every word, and it made sense in a way she hadn’t expected. Dieter Bravo might have been a disaster in relationships, but he was choosing not to be a disaster with her. And that meant something.
“Well,” she said, her smile returning as she reached for another fry, “that’s good to know. I mean, you’re still a complete disaster, but you’re my kind of disaster.”
Dieter’s grin widened, the tension finally easing as he leaned back in his seat. “I’ll take it.”
She chewed thoughtfully for a moment, then added with a smirk, “Besides, now I’m legally being paid to not fuck you.”
He laughed, throwing his head back in genuine amusement. “And I’m legally paying you to not fuck me.”
She nodded sagely. “Sounds like a pretty sweet deal if you ask me.”
Dieter chuckled, the heaviness of the earlier conversation replaced by their usual playful energy. “Yeah, it’s working out pretty well so far.”
They both sat there, comfortable in the aftermath of the conversation, knowing that while the chemistry between them was undeniable, the friendship was what mattered most. And neither of them was willing to risk it, even if they joked about it.
They sat in the car, the remnants of their Five Guys feast scattered on the console between them. The night had slipped into a comfortable quiet, the kind that came from hours of laughter, honest conversation, and greasy burgers. Dieter stretched, glancing over at her with a lazy grin.
“So, what’s the plan?” he asked, wiping his hands on a napkin. “You heading home now?”
She nodded, finishing the last of her fries. “Yeah. Gotta pack up my stuff and get ready for the big move.”
Dieter raised an eyebrow, his lips curling into a smirk. “Right. Moving in with me. Never thought I’d reach this point in my life where a woman’s moving in with me... and I legally can’t fuck her.”
She snorted, shaking her head as she leaned back into her seat. “Welcome to adulthood, Bravo. Full of responsibilities and boundaries.”
Dieter’s grin widened, leaning a little closer. “So, about this moving in thing—are you planning on, like, wearing layers of clothing at all times? Because I don’t need to make this harder for myself than it already is.”
She shot him a look, deadpan. “Harder for yourself?”
He wiggled his eyebrows at her, eyes twinkling with mischief. “You know what I mean.”
She rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help the grin spreading across her face. “Listen, I promise to be fully covered in the ugliest, most unflattering pajamas you’ve ever seen. Think, like, thermal underwear, oversized sweaters, maybe a balaclava if I’m feeling extra considerate.”
Dieter threw his head back laughing, slapping the dashboard. “Jesus Christ, I don’t know if I should be grateful or terrified.”
“Both,” she said with a smirk, grabbing the last fry from the bag and popping it into her mouth.
Dieter leaned back, sighing contentedly. “I still can’t believe it though. I’m actually gonna live with a woman. And she’s not some wild fling, but an assistant I’m paying not to fuck. Talk about a plot twist.”
She laughed, wiping her hands on a napkin. “Well, you better get used to it. I’ll be back in the morning with all my crap.”
Dieter grinned, clearly amused by the whole situation. “Promise?”
“Promise,” she said, flashing him a smile. “Bright and early. So you better get your beauty sleep.”
He chuckled, looking at her fondly. “I’ll try.”
She reached for the door handle, pausing for a moment before looking back at him, her tone soft but teasing. “Try not to miss me too much tonight, alright?”
Dieter winked. “No promises.”
She stepped out of the car, waving as she walked toward her building. “See you tomorrow, Bravo.”
He watched her go, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Yeah,” he muttered under his breath, leaning back into the seat. “See you tomorrow.”
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thelonelyshore-if · 2 days
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The fog immunity question made me wonder about something else about the powers again.
It's more about the mechanics of it though. So, you said multiple times that the powers are a sort of balance, where if you lean too much into it, it will be very bad but too little and it won't really be usable / controlled. But what does that mean "gameplay wise" so to speak? For the time being, I don't believe we had any checks related to powers, considering our MC didn't even discover their power yet. Now, some choices may have influenced what the power may be I assume, but as far as I know, no actual checks yet, right? But anyway, once MC discovers their power and it's "set in stone" for the game, I guess we'll start getting instances where MC can chose to use said power or something else instead, and using it would raise the "skill level"? But does that mean we'll have to balance very carefully how many times we use the powers to grasp them but not be consumed by them? Or does that mean only using them in some specific circumstances while doing so in others will "make it bad"? Something else instead?
I know it's a weird question but I'm always paranoid about stuff like that in games so I prefer knowing how it actually works so that I can be mindful of it.
Howdy! Thanks for the ask. I'll try to explain a little more below the cut c:
To start out, you're totally right: there are no stat checks related to the magic/powers yet. And there (likely) won't be until the point in which the MC's magic choice is locked in. I won't say that 100%, because that's a while away, but that's my current plan.
And hm. I'll do my best to explain without getting into spoilers, but I'm sorry if it still ends up unclear!
There is absolutely a balance to be had when it comes to using your magic. MC training their powers/skills is important--not knowing how to use them is dangerous--and there's a 'sweet spot' where the magic is stable, more or less.
Frequency of use is a big part of it Using magic every so often isn't a problem, but if your MC starts relying on it constantly, it could raise their chances of being corrupted. For example, a clairvoyant MC trying to see the future in an emergency is different than a clairvoyant MC who uses their magic daily to see the weather, if that makes sense?
Part of it is also how much magic is being used. There will be certain events/opportunities in game where MC (or other characters who can use magic) will have choices that could use a ton of magic. One huge burst of power can be a lot more dangerous than several smaller ones.
There will be a stat tracking this, and it very well might be shown on the stat page for the player to see, but I haven't decided for sure yet.
Apologies that this isn't the most specific, but I hope it gives you a general idea!
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kakusu-shipping · 1 year
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My half of the art trade with @echoes-lighthouse; Our Danganronpa Trigger Happy Havoc Self Inserts hanging out!
I think they'd be pretty good friends, if they could be civil in the same room together for more than five minutes. I think in reality the majority of their friendship would be bickering about who should date who in their class, until Taka splits them up.
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bunnihearted · 2 months
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𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
#it hurts but it is natural and im not oversensitive and im allowed to feel this way#the future i had envisioned and hoped for and believed in was just.. suddenly gone and im allowed to mourn the loss#because for an entire year i've been wanting this. and imagining it and thought of ways it could be real#and i didnt base my feelings only on imagination but on his words and him saying that we should figure out whatever was between us#and in the way we talked and what we shared and how he did start treating me as 'his girl'#which i also do not think was irresponsible nor am i upset by that. bc i wasnt 100% present bc of my avpd stuff#but it was so amazing and he was so amazing and i'd been having feelings for him for half a year before and then i only fell more and more#im trying to be as non specific as possible bc like i can only talk abt *me*.. but there were just sm other things and circumstances#so it got less and less intense.. and i wanted to give him space and patience and not push smth on him and be insensitive#then i told him abt being in love w him and wanting to be there for him w his struggles and working it out together#and im embarrassed af but i had honestly thought... that would be met well and with reciprocity...#(i understand that feelings cant be forced & im not upset or feel betrayed i just felt v sad bc i was so sure he would want me to be his gf#but i got neither a clear rejection nor much of what he was thinking abt me and what was between us. mostly just that it wasnt a good timin#so again i wanted to respect that and not keep push it. even if i tried bringing it up sometimes it never got anywhere and it didnt feel#right to just keep and keep on doing it. then there were times when i /felt/ rejection and got more hope based on interactions#truly i've been walking around for a year believing that this was smth that would come true if only we could talk#and i've been waiting and hoping and loving. and i've really been thinking of it as a real future#i even tried telling him a few months ago that if he wants me he can have all of me but he told me to stop so i did#and now i've learned that none of my devotion or hope was returned... i've been in this waiting room all alone all this time#i thought i was patient bc of all the other things but he couldnt give me a chance but he did for someone else and that just hurts#idk it hurts bc this love and connection meant so much to me and i wanted to do anything to make it work#and when u realize all of a sudden that it was only u who felt that and that future u so badly thought would happen isnt real#.... i feel extremely lost and despairing. plus it just is how i feel but i've only been this connected to him#honestly it might sound weird how i can feel this much for someone i've never met irl but he has been my only hope and comfort#for the past years he hs been my only comfort and the only thing making me feel good and ok and hopeful.... so it hurts it hurts it hurts!!
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fluffle-writes · 4 months
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I wanna. Pick them up in my mouth and shake 'em around like a dog obliterating a squeaky toy
#you can tag anyone you feel this way about but I was thinking about Rook hunt in particular#tbh I feel like he'd picture the same - just with Vil and Neige#he wanta his oshis to be besties (he is just lime me fr) (just a liiiittle furyher frim reality)#(I view neigexVil as nore of a crackship until we get more Neige development/lore)#(our queen Vil doesn't deserve to be genuinely shipped with someone who's kinda 2D rn.#But I respect people who flesh out neige with headcanons - they write the dynamics realy well tbh)#(hopefully we get more RSA development at some point I think that'd be cool)#(plus I'd cry if TWST just. stopped. after the last NRC OB)#(I mean it'd make sense aince that's where the story is based and it'll probably end once Yuu finds a way home#- which feels close now thanks to Ortho)#(But at the same time I. have been following this since it first came out when I was about 16 - same age as the first year squad lol)#(and I feel like it'd feel weird if we stopped getting main story updates)#(Im rambling a LOT lol - probably because I'm tipsy haha)#(hope someone can relate to my lamenting of future woes though)#(Oh well - I should atop borrowing sorrow from the future and live joyfully with the now)#(I do miss my friends who've stopped being in the fandom though - and my friends who deactivated and idk how to contact now)#(sugarandmelody... zacrazyvalentine... I miss them. but we had fun#writing and stuff. and I suppose that's what matters in the end. that we had fun.)#at least - I hope they had fun too. and I kinda hope they think about me how I think of them sometimes.#have a nice day if you're reading this. I rambled in the tags a while and I understand that it's kinda long lol.#and probably riddled with typos#I'm tearing up for some reason haha. well it is what it is#I hope each and every one of my followers know how amazing they are - I hope y'all have a wonderful day - evening - or night#I wish I could hug people across the internet lol#I should stop posting on tumblr while drinky haha#tw drunk#tw drinking#i'll tag it just in case#don't wanna cause discomfort and stuff
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seariii · 7 months
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I was stressed but now i'm more chill and really sleepy...
#overall my mood has been better but i am so incredibly terrified of the future... its like....#like i feel as if someone has holding me at gun point and got told thst if i did any mistakes they would shoot#but then im not given clear instructions on what i need to do and i have to figure it out myself#i am really scared... even tho all of this gave me a new objective... i dont wanna be obsolete...#... so... that what we will work on... also... i wanna work towards my dreams...#I've been putting it off for so long i want to do it#people support me and actually enjoy my voice... i want to...#the things on my plate right now are things i can achieve... but i want more... i want things i actually want...#i want...#my house has a constant buzzing sound. i believe its because of the small power plant behind the lot. which makes it difficult for recording#since i have to get rid of that and that messes with the rest of the audio#its comforting to know it wasnt the mic tho... heh...#tomorrow lets try to take the first few steps... well more like lets try to continue with the set up#we have already a couple stuff but we still have a lot missing...#... today the girls said some stuff that impressed me... thats how im perceived?... is that what people think of me?#i kinda want to... fulfill those 'expectations'... they dont expect anything but its more of a me thing... ive been dreaming and hoping for#so long but i dont take the next step. i never do... and its because of the executive dysfunction... but... once i get the hang of it...#once i do... everything will be excellent... and we will take it easy#i am so tired already... i feel im gonan falla sleep#seari talks
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deviousdiesel · 2 months
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#so that dotd rewrite is out and i have some thoughts on it but i wouldn't know where to put them.. maybe in here bc i don't actually feel -#- like making a whole ass text post. this is coming from me as criticism and not hate.. just some crit from one fan to another if you get m#SPOILERS AHEAD >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>#first off props to the team because this was obv a labor of love - 4 and a half years to make a feature long fan movie is hard work#and the animated stuff was a really nice touch and very commendable - you don't see them too often in big fanworks#in terms of the story well.. there are some things i like and some things that i don't (personally) again no hate#i'm aware this is a rewrite and boy howdy it IS a rewrite - though i am a bit sad that percy doesn't end up being the protagonist and it's#- thomas that has to play hero again.. like i kinda get it but what made the original dotd stand out was that percy was given the spotlight#so i spent an ungodly amount of time wondering when percy was gonna take charge or step into the main story to resolve the problem.. sigh#i liked that they tried to give norman more of a character bc a lot of characters do often get neglected in the series but it was kind of -#- hard to sell that for me? the twist in this rewrite was very creative and i do appreciate it but i guess it just ain't for me#“different” is ok and this is just one of many fan rewrites for this particular story#if there was something i enjoyed.. i guess the beginning was still kind of exciting because the set up was honestly like hype a bit#i liked that diesel and d10 actually got to interact face to face and there are clearer dynamics established for the diesels#and also. silverband's performances as d10 will always be fun he does a fantastic job voicing him (how d10 stole xmas will still be my fav)#my criticisms for this movie also derive from the pacing and the voice acting - i found it hard to try and understand tones sometimes -#- because the delivery felt so off.. like don't get me wrong not everyone in the fandom is a voice actor but if we're using static faces -#- for these fan works the delivery has to be a little more clear or else it'll sound like you're reading from a script.. sorry yall :"|#for the pacing i found it a bit hard to parse when some things were going on and how fast things were progressing#as well as the crashes.. that's also another thing bc i couldn't tell bc of the sfx and audio balancing - it could be better..#i wanna say. muffled voices do not substitute for a “far away”/off-screen voice bc i still can't hear it :“|#there were a lot of throwbacks and references to older thomas media/movies but some of them felt a little.. much?#if this is a dotd rewrite why are we getting some parallels with tatmr.. but i digress. at least they made diesel beef with duck a bit#there's a lot more i could say but i'm keeping those to myself. at the end of the day this fan movie was hard work for everyone involved#and you can tell some of the folks were having fun in there - props to them! i'm always glad to see more fan works in the community#we've come so far we're making feature length fan stories and rewrites that's crazy! i hope to see more in the future#fauxtrainpost.txt
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boredkitkulover · 3 months
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excited
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foxgirlmoth · 1 year
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I don't talk about this stuff on here pretty much at all, but a past relationship really broke a ton of bits and pieces of my brain and heart in weird ways (I'm finally thinking about him almost never but the shit he pulled was abusive as hell and still affects me sometimes). Being in love with my current girlfriends for a while felt almost. Painful? Almost like I should be ashamed I can fall so deeply in love with people, and especially how quickly that can happen sometimes too. Thats how it kind of felt. I tend to get overwhelmed with emotions if I'm feeling them very strongly, and that has been extremely embarrassing and also felt almost like I was being a burden to those I love (which love is the main emotion that can 'get dialed up to 11' for me). It IS debilitating in some ways!!! It hasn't gotten bad enough I've been nonverbal in a really really long time but that happened this past week and it was wild to me.
Things are getting better now though! Therapy in the past has helped, and honestly having such patient and understanding partners has made a world of difference ;w;. my wife is someone who was one of my best friends and I had a huge crush on and now I can ask for cuddles and we can nap together and I've fallen so much in love. Her and her presence are literally heaven for me, I don't know if anything has ever made me happier than just laying next to her and feeling her warmth.
Worries of course flare up and I feel like I need to lean on her a lot during those moments, but I don't feel like too much of a burden to her. I love seeing the posts that say stuff like 'Its okay to be a burden' or 'its okay to be annoying' because really truly I think I need to be those things to survive sometimes. I can be 'a lot' and I can be a little bit obsessive and those things aren't inherently bad or evil of me. I just make sure I'm feeling okay during and after and make sure I'm checking in on myself often. I'm a bit of a broken girl, but that doesn't mean I'm not extremely happy and living a life I love. I've written poems and everything about how it feels like it must hurt to love me and my broken jagged edges, but hey, even if it does a little bit, it doesn't mean someone like my girlfriend/wife won't go through a little bit of burden to love me, and I'm more than happy to return all of this and more for her as well if she's ever in need or feels broken ;^;
#Not to be too gay but I wanna build my life with my princess more and more#She's. So good to me and she's so pretty and she's so beautiful and attentive and she listens to me in ways I feel no one else has#She understands me so well!! And I hopefully make her feel the same#But yeah I've been a burden a lot to people due to autism (which I didn't know I had for fucking ages) adhd and physical disabilites#And she feels like she isn't taking care of me which is good because I'd honestly hate that#But she understands me and makes me a better person and that's exactly what I've wanted for forever.#And being demi/aspec is awesome with her since she's aspec too and there's no pressure for sex or sexy times but if we both want it#It can still be super fun!! We gotta figure more of that stuff out if we want but knowing each others kinks (and sharing a good bit) rocks#Idk its so so so so easy to love my wife Maxie#She's so dear to me and we've only been dating for 4 months but they've been 4 months I've felt the most alive and seen#Its so easy to be cringe but free with her too idk#She makes me better and I hope I do the same for her. I don't want either of us to stagnate yknow?#But anyways yeah this is just a big journal entry of some kind I might do these every once and a while#Not to like. Brag??? I guess. Or show my mental illness so much. Its just kind of nice if friends know where I'm at in my life I guess#And idk having outside input on thoughts can be good. If any friends see this and go 'Hey Runa this is real weird maybe tone it down'#I can look at that stuff a bit more#Gonna tag this in a way I can find it and others in the future too#Runa diary logs#But yeah you're not hearing this from me but I wanna be with Maxine for the foreseeable future more than anything.#Gotta get my degree and a good job too and she's ofc not the only person in my life (I have Sara who is so very dear to me too ;w;)#Nor is she the only 'goal' I have either. I wanna make games I wanna make art. I wanna make something that other trans people#And queer people and just minorities in general can look at or play or experience and just go. Life is worth living#I love my life right now and I'm so glad I've made it to my late 20's.#Its only uphill from here :3#Wanna add on when I say she's not the only person in my life I mean that I have so many friends and people I love who love me too :3#♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
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bunnyb34r · 10 months
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I know I should just block (and not OPEN) tags and posts ab '24 but my brain is stupid and likes to be informed even if it makes me worse
#marquilla#im not even joking when i say this next election makes me wanna kms so bad. im fucking terrified and i feel like we already know what's#gonna happen. not bc people arent voting or organizing i mean bc of how far the right has gotten and how angry they are that a#dem won so theyre gonna show up in droves and it's like god i wish we could idk have some safegaurds in place??? like oh idk you#incite an insurrection you Can't run for president?? but also that wouldnt fully stop shit bc florida has its own neo nazi running and#theres more behind him in the wings. but like idk man i just get so fucking suicidal thinking ab the future#and my drs. are like well then dont look at the news??? 'i sure dont' mkay thats great (not) but um i CAN'T not watch bc i need to#be informed i need to know. and they're like well then stop worrying ab it til election day?? LIKE THAT HELPS#so i just dont bring it up. and i just spiral and have breakdowns in the shower and think ab making a will and shit yknow normal stuff#bc this is fine! just dont engage! stop worrying it's like a year away! it MIGHT get better! idk Join in your community then??#like yes yes thats a start but with what fucking energy when im bedbound most of the time im not working and that doesnt stop these fascist#s like me helping the community garden would be good for the community and probably my mental health in general BUT that doesnt deal with#the actual fear that makes me wanna Kermit#like it really fucking feels like all i can do is pray and hope god somehow intervenes (rapture anyone?) and that things do go well and#that the outright outspoken nzis don't win but like I really just wanna die man#i know the outcome more than likely will not directly affect my life bc im white. cis passing. and can go back in the closet regretfully#but like that doesnt reassure me any bc i have friends and loved ones and generally just give a shit ab other people and how this WILL#affect them directly and that terrifies me. it really feels like we cant ever have a moment to just exist yknow??#idk man i just wanna die bc im so scared haha how fun (: how normal (: this is fine. everything is fine.
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strwbrymlkshake · 2 years
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Why can't I be satisfied with everything? It needs to be perfect to me and I can't accept anything otherwise :(
#mine#oh boy here we go. guy last post was about has been pretty cool and i got flustered around him a few times#but i feel bad bc. i need m o r e he isnt insane enough he isnt making me go absolutely crazy i want to be satisfied but im NOT im sorry#like its quite honestly the most attention acceptance etc ive gotten but its not ENOUGH he doesnt die whenever i send a selfie#im never satisfied WHY i have unrealistic expectations !!!! i hate my brain killing and violence and death etc#i get crushes on guys who want nothing to do with me but then when one actually wants me its not enough? what is wrong with me#thrill of the chase? i cant accept being loved? what is it brain. christ almighty. im not doing anything like deliberately yandere related#anymore im just being generally incomprehensibly mentally ill 🙄 still trying to find a therapist but idk how on earth ill explain that#ill update this post tomorrow with more insanity but for now i am the sleepy tired#// ok its now 3 days later i dont feel like making another post. i think i was just having a mental illness moment as always#because he does make me insane. hashtag girl. im trying to be the smartest and calculated i have ever been with a relationship in my life#like im thinkin about it so hard bro. the future n shit. how would this relationship go. im so scared ill do something wrong its preventing#me from doing things RIGHT. im sad becaude i flipped out today over even imagining him being upset with me a little#so i was really embarrassed and it put me in a weird mood for the rest of the night but he reassured me he doesnt hate me or want me to die#every one aaalways says theyre different. i can only hope this one is telling the truth. i dont know what ill do if he isnt.#well i need to stop whining about fictional scenarios and focus on the good stuff in reality. i get along with him very well and he#is very niceys to me :3 he doesnt think im fucking insane or stupid for overreacting. i feel very comfortable gossiping and talking w him#every long time blog viewer of mine reading this like ah shit here we go again#but thats what im here for. i guess. just have to keep doing this shit until something good finally happens to me romantically hngh#i feel so strange because i have wanted and yearned for a relationship but now that i actually could have one im like WAIT#I DIDNT THINK ID GET THIS FAR 💀💀💀 bruh. and he doesnt even think im stupid hes respectful to me he checks in on me all the time#like perhaps the only person to ever actually almost match my energy in a romantic sense. there was [redacted] i guess but he didnt love me#he listens to me talk about my problems he doesnt think i complain or overreact too much. all the ridiculous cringe shit i do#he doesnt mind it. its nice to be able to be myself. and im really proud of myself for not rushing into a relationship right away
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medicinemane · 7 months
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As always, if you wonder why I don't talk about certain current events but do others, a lot of it comes down to whether I think it's something that other people are talking about a lot
If it's something where I figure you're going to be well informed and need a break, I tend to keep it to a minimum on here cause you already know
If it's something I rarely see talked about, then I'm more likely to mention it
World's bad, we're all doing what we can, I know people have said to me before they appreciate me more keeping to cats and frogs and random stuff, so I mostly try to do that, but... in the end I just kinda share whatever my brain decides to share
Want to give my thought process though
#and in this case it's a matter of that Syria really does feel forgotten and I won't deny I often forget too#but with the stuff that's going on right now I really prefer to when I can be reblogging stuff that has something at least a bit actionable#stuff that says where you can donate to give aid via reputable sources... that's what I like to try and focus on#but yeah... man; only place I really ever tend to see Syria mentioned is in Ukrainian circles#so that's why I wanted to highlight that one#man I wish I could do more in the world#so many people suffering and... and... well; and I can't do shit about it and that sucks#just keep trying to slowly get things together around here; and trying to slowly be able to help more and more people#and just hope that if you help people; it'll make them want to help people like they were helped#and maybe if enough of us get stable ground under our feet and know how it was to be helped... maybe some day we can collectively help enou#...try to avoid making things feel hopeless with my posts; cause things certainly feel hopeless#so I try to... try to focus on the good and what can be done to fix things as much as possible#want to keep people in the fight to try and make things better; not drain them by posting nothing but the bleakness of the world#things will never be right; those who've died can't be saved and we've failed them forever#which is all the more reason we can't give up and have to keep trying to make things better#because if we can never make things right; then the least we can do is try and make things better in the future#to at least stop adding to the list of people we'll never be able to fix things for#...something like that#it's bleak and I'm depressive anyway; but show must go on; you know?#so that's my thoughts here#I just feel the need to explain it sometimes; because people have a way of making assumptions#that if you don't talk about something you don't care#no... that's not it; I care; I just don't want to burn people out#and you can say they shouldn't burn out but I try to deal in practicalities and descriptivism; and people can be burned out#rather keep them in the fight to make the world better#so if there's a situation... like the George Floyd protests; that was another one where I didn't post much on it#cause we all knew... we all were paying attention and... I just figured people needed space#...I'm sad... sad more police reforms and accountability couldn't get pushed though but... at least we got something#...and I'm not gonna act like I'm some front line fighter when it comes to justice#I barely can deal with my own shit; I'm not saying I'm worth a damn thing in any cause
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pepprs · 2 years
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i wish i’d kept pushing the point (<- vagueposting). im so tired i’m hitting a wall. but why is the answer to feeling bottomlessly lonely just to love myself and be loved by myself? isn’t that only more loneliness?
#purrs#i know being by myself is not aloneness. but like seriously are you actually serious that there is no one coming to save me? that I have to#walk around with this giant gaping wound forever and no one will be able yo close it? i need total nurturance and comfort badly and to have#any less than total is.. well i don’t want to say it’s as bad as having none at all because obviously it’s not true. but it’s still bad. it#makes it harder to ask for more when you already have some and have reached the limit of what you can ask for. i just feel bottomlessly#lonely. i know things will get better. but what i really need is a long hug and a good cry in someone’s arms. not isolating myself in a#cabin for a week (though i know i desperately need that too). like we’re human beings and we can do that for each other so why don’t we? why#can’t we fix each other? why can’t we be nurturing like that and fill the voids for people who have them. and i know it’s rich coming from m#me bc iam skittish like a horse around emotions and also that it’s pitifully expected from me bc i am reading too much into normal experien#nces most people have. but how am i supposed to just accept that i didn’t get the love i needed (even if im romanticizing m*therlove lmao) a#and then move on as if that’s fine? how can i just snap my fingers and be an autonomous adult when ive spent years accruing psychological#damage with the most limited kind of cushioning? when every second brings with it a potential jab to my River of Pain nerve? idk.#i was deeply violently depressed abt this stuff earlier this week but tonight im just quietly sad. i want the stability and certainty of#(unconditional) love. i want my whole future safe and warm and now or at least the ability to trust it will exist which is also called hope.#i don’t want to be alone and wretched anymore.
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boyruggeroii · 1 year
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Oh boy
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thethingything · 2 years
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I think our sleep schedule has hit that weird point where we just sleep randomly whenever for short bursts which isn't ideal but it's whatever. I'll maybe order some food to put in our fridge later so we've got stuff to eat when we wake up at weird times and then just pass out whenever
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