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disorganizedkitten · 1 year ago

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Miracle Fighters

Miraculous Ladybug | 2019 | 1,968 | Ao3 | Next

“Using misdirection? How unlawful!” Riposte went after the right one, who dodged the hit and brought his baton towards her head. Riposte moved out of the way, but the left one threw a hit too. She blocked it, but between trying to keep herself safe from two attackers and the clouding of judgement that came from the Akuma serum, Riposte was completely open for Alya to walk up behind her and whack her with the abandoned Guitar.

“That is for Nino,” she snapped, watching Riposte crumple.

“You move fast,” Adrien noted.

“So, what should we do our mythology project on? I think the history of dragons around the world would be interesting.”

The redhead's parter hummed. “I don't know, dragons are a bit mainstream, and I don't want to lose points for lack of originality.”

He narrowed his eyes slightly. “Do you have something else in mind, or just not dragons?”

The brunette smiled, “Have you ever heard of the Miracle fighters?”

“No, what are they?”

“They’re immortals, only surfacing to fight demons and magic. You can find trace of them almost anywhere, if you look enough.” she tapped her throat coyly. “I just so happen to be an expert.”

Two rows in front of them, another brunet turned to his partner. “What do you think Nette, should we do our project on the Miracle fighters too?”

‘Nette’s’ deskmate snorted, pausing her own conversation to cut in. “Why, so you can both lose points for lack of originality?”

They both stuck their toungues out. “I don’t know, Nino,” ‘Nette’ shrugged, doing an abysmal job at hiding her smirk. “It’d be a little weird if the self-proclaimed expert doesn’t know as much as two or four random classmates.”

The other three laughed, each failing in their own degree to stifle it.

“That’s the problem with self-proclaimed experts. ” The brunette flicked the other’s cap, narrowing her eyes as she leaned back on her chair. “They never check their info against someone else.”

“Truer words have never been spoken.”

“Actually, I’m pretty sure sometime around the 12th Egyptian dynasty a certain Miracle Fighter said something to the tune of-”

“Anyway!” the blond cut in quickly, trying to bring the conversation back to the actual topic before he was embarrassed. ‘Nette’ laughed as he continued. “What are we doing?”

“What about the Fou Follet?!” Alya asked right away.

“The what?”

“They’re a version of will-o-wisp, Adrien,” Nino informed. “Nette, what about changelings?”

“That or Sidhe,” Marinette nodded.

“Perfect! We can fill each other plum full of Irish-”

“Or Creole,” Alya interjected forcibly.

“Yes, and/or Creole mythology facts around missions.”

Marinette yawned. “Sounds great. But I want a nap first.”

“Mood,” Alya yawned in response, leaning onto Marinette’s shoulder.

“Alright Sleeping beauties, let’s vacate the school before you two collapse.”

Adrien slammed his fist into the door. “You have got to be kidding me!” he turned around, rubbing his forehead. “Again. I’m really off my game.”

“We’re not out of the running yet,” Marinette said, barely panting as she surveyed the area. “There’s no way they had enough time to cut off all exits.”

“The open exit runs back where we just came from, and trying to loop around will take ages. They'll be gone by the time we make it over, and even then the stabilizers are going to be off.”

Marinette tutted lightly. “Think outside the box, remember? Can you give me a boost?”

Adrien shrugged, but obliged, bending down so she could climb onto his shoulders. Marinette scrambled up, caught her balance, and then jumped off his shoulders. She slammed a hook into the barred window, and hung off it. The window bent under her weight, slowly at first, and then completely peeling away and dropping her into Adrien's waiting arms.

“Nice thinking, Buginette.”

“Thank you.”

Adrien tossed her again, and Marinette latched onto the windowsill this time. She shimmied through, cursing the fluffy skirts of the 1700s -at least she wasn't trying in a 1850s skirt! That would be downright impossible - and somersaulted into the hallway. Marinette started to dismantle the lock, but gave up a second in, completely prying the mechanism out of the door.

“M’lady, you’re the best,” Adrien smiled.

Marinette nodded. “I know that, now come on. We still have an akuma to catch, an object to swipe, and then teammates to check on.” she cracked her knuckles, and then the two of them took off.

The building the akuma had led them too was a stereotypical movie maze-atory, hallways that led nowhere, winding around the building to hide where the real rooms were. None of the Miracle fighters disagreed when Plagg had huffed about the obvious discrepancy they had missed during the building’s construction. How would architects build this in the 1700s? And why would they think it was a good use of resources? Footsteps echoed across the hallways as the two timetravelers ran, the low heels on the tiles emphasizing the noise.

Marinette pivot-hopped around a corner, pausing a few feet in for Adrien to slam a vortex stabilizer into the wall, before they were both off again.

The Akuma organization dated back to.. well, they hadn’t figured that out yet. The problem with time travel was that they could go backwards and establish themselves in any time they wish, and since the Miracle fighters (someone in 1200 AD had coined the name, and it stuck) hadn’t caught on to Akuma’s meddling until they were rooted enough to change history, the Miracles didn’t actually know where to look. So they were stuck chasing the heads with flamethrowers, since they couldn’t cut it off before they split.

“Eat blade!”

Adrien and Marinette dove to the side, caught off guard. Of course Riposte and Guitar laid a trap.

“Sorry, I'm allergic to steel,” Adrien quipped. Marinette could hear his baton extending, and she pulled out her bandalore too.

“You take Riposte, I take Guitar?”

“Already on it, M'lady!”

Marinette nodded, and threw the yo-yo out. It twisted around the guitar - Why wouldn’t Guitar Villain fight with a guitar? That made sense in the grand scheme of things. Not. Then again, neither did Akuma.

Guitar hollered, trying to yank the weapon out of the string.

“It's not that easy to snap magic, now is it?” Marinette taunted, loosening the string as he stumbled forward. She dashed to a wall, sticking her tongue out as she leaned casually against it.

Guitar snarled and rushed at her, a shout that had something to do with feeling the music echoing off the walls. Marinette braced herself, and leapt onto his shoulders as he tried to crush her.

A well placed heel strike - that hopefully didn't cause any bleeding, these heels were sharp - and he was down.

Marinette rolled off the body as it came down, landing daintily. She looked up, finding Adrien and Riposte still trading blows. She stood up, staying far enough away to not be completely in range, but close enough to jump in at a moment's notice. “You good, Kitty?”

“Absolutely purrfect M'lady, never been better.” and then as he moved to dodge a blow, Adrien split in two.

“That is for Nino,” she snapped, watching Riposte crumple.

“You move fast,” Adrien noted.

Alya dropped the guitar and pulled her flute out. “It helps that I've been able to build solid illusions recently. Did you guys place all the vortex stabilizers?”

Adrien nodded.

“How..” Marinette glanced back at Riposte, flinching.

Adrien finished the sentence for her. “How is Nino?”

“He safely in the 21st century with the others, and is getting the medical attention he needs.”

“Good.”

“Are we ready to get outta here?” Alya glanced around, eyes wary.

“I think so. We can take these two and double back, Lady Wifi and Befana should still be waiting..” Marinette turned to Alya, “Are they-?”

Alya nodded. “I passed them both.” she held her flute to her mouth, and blew a few notes. Two stretchers appeared, which flew themselves over to the Akuma and picked the up.

“Now, who remembers the way back?”

Two pairs of eyes landed, unamused, on Marinette. She snorted. “I’m kidding! It’s hard to get lost in a box, come on.”

***

Despite knowing that Nino had made it safely to the atrium, Marinette and Adrien still ran towards the medical room as soon as they crossed the threshold. Alya joined them seconds later, having literally dropped the Akumas at Tikki and Orikko’s feet.

“How’s he doing?”

“The blade had traces of corruption on it, but we were able to treat the infection before it went too far.” Wayzz was sitting just to the side of Nino’s cot.

“Oh thank goodness.” Marinette laid her head on the edge of the cot.

“Thank you, Wayzz,” Alya said, reaching for Nino’s hand.

Wayzz just nodded.

Trixx appeared out of nowhere to kneel beside Alya. “If you had gotten him here even half a minute later it would have latched on too much to be pulled. I’m proud of you for keeping your head, kit.”

“Would you believe me if I said I was panicking the entire time? I think it was training that got me through it.”

“That’s why we train,” Trixx agreed.

They sat there for a while, the only noises being faint and coming from the Kwami going about their business in other rooms.

Pollen poked her head into the atrium, blonde hair still under a net. “Kids, you need to come eat. Nino isn’t going to pop out of existence while you’re gone.”

They started to grumble, but Pollen just clicked her tongue and ushered them into the dining room. Alya glanced back at Nino one more time as she left the room.

She stopped, eyes locked on his purple shirt. The purple shirt that was blue when she had been right beside him. Alya reached for her flute, but his shirt was blue again before she moved an inch. “Did anyone else see that?”

“See what?” Adrien asked, joining her in the doorframe.

“He flashed purple.”

Adrien sucked in a breath. “But he’s not now, right? Maybe you were just seeing things?”

“I know what I saw, Adrien!”

Pollen clicked her tongue again. “We kwami know what we’re doing when we kill corruption. It’s not uncommon for bouts of worry to change which images are transmitted to the brain, especially after such a traumatic event as this. Now get in here and get some food in you, or I’ll be forced to send Chloe on the next missions solo.”

Alya nodded, taking a deep breath as she turned. She had gotten him back in time. She had to have.

Bright. That was what he thought as he regained consciousness. Too bright. He belonged somewhere dark. Dark and alone. He wanted the dark.

The light lessened as he thought it. Once it was dark enough he could open his eyes he did so. There was a very dark bubble around the object he had been laid on. He sat up slowly, feeling around his surroundings.

He didn’t know where he was.

He didn’t know who he was.

He existed, but why? How old was he? What was his purpose? How did he manage the bubble?

He held up his hand, watching the brown fingers move. Another bubble, a smaller, blue, one this time popped out.

He made bubbles. What a fun purpose. Actually, why couldn’t that be a name too? Bubbler. Yeah, he liked that.

“Bubbler.”

He snapped around, looking for the source of the voice.

“Bubbler, I am Hawkmoth.” It was in his head. “You are one of my warriors, tasked with retrieving the artifacts of the Mage from a group of thieves. You were captured by our enemies hours ago. It’s good to hear from you. Are you willing to retake your mantel and continue the fight?”

Bubbler nodded. That sounded workable. “Of course, man.”

#miraculous ladybug #jaymeow writes #marinette dupain-cheng #nino lahiffe #Librarians au #The Librarians au #not actual librarians. the tv series #magic librarians #Ml Tikki #Kwami as knights #unfinished fic #wip #Miraculous Ladybug Left To Write Confidential Cupid Exchange #Crossposting spam

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emmym1 · 2 years ago

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My thoughts on... Captain Marvel 2019 (#1-5) "Re-entry"

So i've decided to start reading Captain Marvel (2019)! I've heard tons of great things about this run and I am super hyped that I finally get to read it. Captain Marvel has always been a really cool and awesome character to me so i'm excited to explore her stories beyond her movie appearances! And it did not dissapoint so far.

So the story starts off with an absolutely badass team-up between Captain Marvel & Jessica Drew aka Spider-Woman. I absolutely love their dynamic, they're such a fun duo to see in action. Not only do they kick ass together, they also have some pretty fun dialogue inbetween that. It's amazing to see how well they play into each other's strenghts and weaknesses. After their team-up where they defeated some kind of alien monster they split ways and Carol has a meeting with Tony Stark about joining the Avengers again. Turns out they're all about good PR and stuff now so Carol has to do an interview, to which she annoyingly agrees. Shortly after agreeing to it she meets a young hero called Hazmat, she has toxic based powers that can be extremely dangerous. Tony has been helping her keep it under control but it's safe to say she doesn't like him very much. She's able to have a much nicer bond with Carol. She's a pretty fun hero and throughout these first few issues she was a really good addition. After that she meets up with Rhodey after not seeing him for quite some time, although their meetup gets cut short by the interviewer - Ripley Ryan - who was sent by Stark to do the intveriew with Carol. They once again get cut short as Nuclear Man attacks Carol. This dude is the absolute worst and a such a mysoginist, it's actually extremely satisfying to see Carol kick his ass into oblivion. Their fight doesn't last long as Carol beats him fairly easily. Rhodey did call in the Avengers, although they were too late to the scene. Nuclear Man tries to escape through what seems to be a portal while taking Ripley with him. Luckily Carol is able to get into the portal before it closes, while the other avengers can't. Although what's on the other side of this portal is quite insane. Turns out the portal was actually a barrier placed around Roosevelt Island, the part of city has completely changed into a post apocalyptic warzone where time works differently. Turns out Spider-Woman, Echo & Hazmat all have been trapped there for weeks. It was really cool to see them all in post apocalyptic versions of their costumes, they look super badass! As they fill in Carol on the situation it turns out Nuclear Man has turned Roosevelt Island into his playground. He has captured all the men while Spider-Woman, Echo & Hazmat have been safeguarding the women. It's an all womens camp except for one exception, Som. He's the only man in the camp which raises big suspicious with Carol. How come he was the only one to escape? Regardless, she decides to trust him for the time being and with the others she starts to build up an army. It's really cool to see Carol's leadership skills come in action here, she's so organised and knows exactly what do. It's super cool to see her take things into her own hands and lead this army of women. As the days pass by she also gets a new post apocalyptic look, including a new haircut! Which also just looks amazingly badass (they should adapt it in the movies honestly).

As they fight off Nuclear Man's robot army in order to get more supplies, the one and only She-Hulk falls from the sky. Although she quickly loses power and is just falling from the sky at breakneck speed. Luckily Carol is able to save her. It's interesting to see how she calculates the situation to account for her powers so she doesn't accidentally kill people with it. It's a really cool detail that adds a lot of weight to her powers. As they save She-Hulk they retreat and regroup. Due to the barrier alot of the heroes are getting their powers damped to the point where for some of them they don't even work anymore. Carol has had it with Som and decides to interrogate him as he saw Nuclear Man's robots try to capture him and refer to him as "Prince". Turns out he's actually Nuclear Man's son! Turns out Nuclear Man wants Carol to be his bride so she and Nuclear Man can make powerful children (This guy continues to be the worst and an insane creep). He reveals he knows of a tunnel which he used to escape that might come in handy to free the men who are being held hostage. Carol decides to believe Som but orders Echo to tail him just in case. They go to the tunnel for recon and find out that the men are being put in the robots Nuclear Man is using to fight off the women army, which makes saving them a lot more delicate. Carol decides to send everyone back so they can inform the others while she stays and tries to find out more. While she explores the tunnel she stumbles across Rogue, the person who drained her of her power and memories a while back. It's a pretty hardhitting confrontation for her as it brings back a lot of trauma for her. Rogue even starts to absorb her powers again until an electric shock passes her out. Turns out Nuclear Man is controlling her and wants her and Captain Marvel to battle it out to the death, the winner becomes his bride. Carol quickly passes out as she has no energy left after Rogue partially drained her. Back at the camp of the women army the alarms are being rung as Carol still hasn't returned. A battleplan gets made and they decide to finally start their attack on Nuclear Man's base. They re-engineered their weapons to be emp based so that they can save the men without harming them. Back at Nuclear Man's base a fight for the death between Carol & Rogue has begun. It's honestly such a tragic fight to witness. Rogue has no control and you can see her even cry and beg Carol to kill her. Honestly it was a moment that really stood out and hit hard for me. For Carol too it's an incredibly hard fight as she's reliving her worst memories. Knowing she can't win she decides to let Rogue absorb her but then take control over Rogue's body so they can still both win and defeat Nuclear Man. The plan works and it's honestly such a badass moment. It's really intriguing to see these 2 heroes with such a complicated past with each other team up like this in such a badass way to defeat this creep.

After seemingly defeating him Carol returns to her body and so do her powers. However Nuclear Man explains he has bomb ready to detonate. None of them know how or where the bomb is but Echo does. She reveals that she feels like Som is the bomb and it turns out to be true. This is also a really hard hitting moment for Som, he's questioning his entire life. Was he really Nuclear Man's son or just a weapon all along? They have to come up with a plan fast and they decide to let Rogue absorb the bomb. It works and as they absorb the bomb the dome over Roosevelt Island dissapears. They're back in the real world where time works normally again. Captain Marvel, Spider-Woman, Hazmat, Echo & She-Hulk all team up to give Nuclear Man on final blow and the big bad gets defeated. Everyone is safe again and the Avengers show up to help evacuating everybody. Upon seeing Rhodey again he and Carol share a kiss before Carol heads back for debrief. A few days later Ripley also shares her article she made on Captain Marvel after spending a month with her in the wasteland. And the title isn't really flattering. She did Carol dirty, not going to lie! In the final panel of this arc we see that someone was behind the alien monster attack from the beginning of this arc and seemingly has plans for Carol. Curious to see where that'll lead to! This first arc was an amazing introduction to Captain Marvel. I really loved how they showed how she thinks in battle and how she accounts for her power levels. It's super cool stuff and really adds a lot of weight to them. I also love how it ties into Carol as a character. She seems to have suffered a lot of loss and mistakes during battle and kind of struggles with that a lot. She constantly thinks about the cost of things and the mistakes she made. However no matter what happens or what gets thrown to her, she always gets up. Because to put it in her words "if you always get up, then it's never over". I found this to be a really powerful quote that really stuck with me. It's pretty inspiring to me. All of this really sets her up to be an amazing character with a lot of depth to it. And i can't wait for them to explore that further. Carol and Jessica Drew's dynamic was also a real highlight for me. They're such a power duo and their bond with each other is so good. They're perfectly tuned into each other and they work so well together in battle. Hazmat was also an amazing addition to this story, she kind of enriched it in a way i feel. All by all this was an amazing start to this run and it has made me very excited for what's to come. The art is absolutely amazing and there are so many cool and badass moments in this first arc that feel really empowering. It was really cool to see Carol team up with Spider-Woman, Hazmat, Echo & She Hulk. They're an amazing team and I hope it isn't the last we see of them in this run. I feel like they've layed the foundation for an amazing story and i cannot wait to see what comes next!

#comics #captain marvel #earth 616 #marvel #carol danvers

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captaindibbzy · 5 months ago

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I had surgery on my back in 2019. Now I am "morbidly obese" and the problem with my back was ongoing for months while I pissed about with physiotherapy and getting told to lose weight. Then when they discovered the problem I was rushed to the emergency room because there was an imminent risk that I was going to lose the use of my legs below the I jury that had happened seven to eight months before this scan. I had the surgery within 2 days. I could walk without pain within hours of coming round.

Someone, a health professional, later told me that it was a suprise that I'd had it so quickly and they hadn't tried to make me lose weight before having it, citing the whole thing about how difficult it is, supposedly, to do surgery on fat people. Her conclusion was I must be that over weight after all. Once again. Emergency surgery. On my spine. Where I risked the use of my legs and bowel and bladder if it was allowed to continue.

Notably when I was going in to surgery they didn't need an exact weight and height. Just an approximation and a guess for the anesthesia. Idk how safe that is but I didn't wake up half way through so whatever.

Titties are mostly fat. You can get surgery to remove your fat. You can get surgery to remove part of your stomach or mutilate it or have bypass surgery. If I had appendicitis it a broken bone they wouldn't try to make me lose weight before they operated, or I fucking hope they wouldn't. Fat people can have cancer treatment and if they are in a car crash they don't make them walk to the hospital.

Surgery can be performed on fat people perfectly fine when they want to do it, or when they feel they need to do it.

They refused to give my dad top surgery bc of his weight, citing risks regarding anasthesia and possible hemorrage. They want him to do a bypass surgery first...... which has exactly the same risks. Because he is fat he has to be punished by mutilation to be allowed to have his top surgery. They are ready to take the risks in order to make him skinny, but refuse the same risks that would make him happy.

If people can't understand how oppressive this is and how it's literally intersectional oppression in my dad's case, idk what to say.

Yeah, it's absolute hypocrisy to be willing to mutilate the healthy organs of fat people for the sake of potential thinness and lifelong chronic health conditions but then put up roadblocks for any surgeries that actually help fat people. I still remember when the NHS decided to save money by comparing fat people to people who smoke and denying fat people surgery until we magically lose weight. It's a horrific world we live in, and not even people who claim to be progressive want to open their eyes to what fat people endure.

-Mod Worthy

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theweightloss-reviews-blog · 6 years ago

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Want to know how to reverse the damage of sitting at a desk all day?

Want to know how to reverse the damage of sitting at a desk all day? This of us spend the majority of our day sitting. We sit in our car, or on a bus or train, while on our way to work, then we sit once we get to work, come back home, and usually sit some more. Unfortunately for most of us, some of the only time we don’t sit is during our workout, which accounts for only about an hour or so of our day. Slim Body

#how to lose weight quickly and safely 2019 #cinderella solution weight loss reviews #does avocado help loseweight

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howtoloseweightquicklyandsa-blog · 6 years ago

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How To Lose Weight Quickly and Safely

"I eat like a winged animal, for what reason do I put on weight?" When somebody says that, I ask them "What kind or a flying creature a sparrow or a vulture"? Studies showed that there is an immediate connection between's an individual being dormant and weight gain. Specialists state that it is dormancy, not overabundance eating that can include abundance muscle to fat ratio.

Losing abundance bodyweight is straightforward when one pursues certain precise

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For example, I as of late chatted with a lady who was following a notable

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Demonstrating this reasoning is wrong are numerous articles in Therapeutic Diaries. They state

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Muscle tissue is dynamic tissue and gives the capacity to satisfy every day exercises as

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Weight The board

Three parts to weight control are associated and commonly strong.

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Most specialists prescribe an admission of 1200 to 1500 calories every day. That measure of

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For the most part, a sound eating routine ought to be high in starches admission, low in fat and

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Exercise

The accompanying rules offer an outcome creating work out schedule for health food nuts.

I. Recurrence: Three to five days out of every week.

2. Force: 40 to 85% of your most extreme pulse, contingent upon your present

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number 220.

3. Term: As long as 30 minutes (or as prescribed by you medicinal services supplier) at

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4. Kind of action: Any action kept up for a period, utilizing huge muscle bunches in

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(stationary or on-street), paddling machines, or any perseverance type game exercises,

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Social Adjustment and an Emotionally supportive network

Conduct change is the most hard to ace and the most intricate of the three

segments; space does not permit an inside and out discourse or it here. However, here

are a few rules that work.

1. Keep exact records day by day.

2. Eat roods you appreciate yet realize when to stop.

3. Enroll the help or companions and relatives.

4. Gauge yourself close to once per day - morning is ideal.

5. Try not to be so genuine about it that you become demoralized on the off chance that you "blow it"

every so often.

6. Try not to hope to lose multiple pounds or more every week. That is much fat.

Next time, you are al a meat counter, approach the butcher for three pounds or fat.

Seeing accepts.

7. Expect around a seven to multi day interim time before your eating routine kicks in and your

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8. On the off chance that conceivable, partition your total calorie consumption for the day into numerous little rather or go to this site How To Lose Weight Quickly and Safely 2019

three enormous dinners.

9. Be understanding! You can do it.

10. Set sensible, long haul objectives.

Keep in mind remaining fit is a way or life. It calls for better than expected control,

inspiration, and tolerance.

Everybody that makes the duty to lose abundance muscle to fat ratio and to wind up fit,

concur on a certain something: When you accomplish health, you will never need to be normal

once more.

#How To Lose Weight Quickly and Safely 2019

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jamtoasties3316 · 2 years ago

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this is way sweeter (and longer) than my usual thing but hear me out

max presents as a cat omega soon after he turns 21, right before the start of the 2019 season. his f1 career is over, his father throws him out on the street. charles, who's just gotten a double glow up (ferrari and presenting as an alpha) and is about to start his first season in red, finds max curled up in on himself in a monaco backalley. there are a hundred reasons why he shouldn't be taking an omega into his home, and even more why he shouldnt be taking his childhood rival in. however, charles' inherent kindness saviour complex wins and he gathers max in his arms and takes him to his apartment

he takes care of max, bathes him, grooms his ears and tail, pets him gently, makes sure he's healthy and fed, all the time coaxing the clearly traumatised omega out of his shell

soon max makes himself at home and he doesn't want to leave. he feels angry and embarrassed at having to be taken care of, but. it's the first time anyone's been kind to him since he presented. charles is good and safe and warm and he wants to stay and be good for charles - if he cant have racing anymore at least he can have this

maybe max even gets separation anxiety and has to go to all the races with charles, and the drivers are all surprised at how clingy he is, but anytime one of them tries to makes comments or have a go at max charles immediately turns protective. he says it's protective - max knows he's possessive, especially when charles brings up the idea of a collar, but he doesn't mind at all. not when he himself is hissing at omega drivers and fans who get a little too close to charles for his liking behind his back. he won't let anyone take this away from him.

(and he has a brand new red collar now.)

Oh yes! Max presenting as Omega and getting fluffy little cat ears and a tail and he thinks he looks quite pretty, but he quickly turns wary again because he knows his dad wont like it. And then Jos throws him out and he loses his F1 contract too and is just thrown onto the street with nothing. Charles finds him days later, cold and scared and alone. Max hissing at Charles and being scared but softly agreeing when Charles tells him he can come stay with him.

Charles bathing Max and Max is really embarassed at Charles helping him so intimately but he also cant really object because charles gives him kindness and no one else does. Charles brushes his ears and tails, shaves his legs, and then shaves Max's pussy too, saying its omega hygiene to have to do that. Max is blushing like crazy but likes being fussed over, even if its from an alpha with a saviour complex. Charles feeds him and makes sure he gains a little weight, and gives him blankets to nest in. SSure its embarassing being naked or only wearing Charles's clothing most of the time. The sex doesnt start for a while, although Charles does touch him sometimes, especially when he is bathing Max, rubbing his pussy a little and making sure Max is healthy enough to slick up like a healthy omega!

Max needing Charles so bad and he cries the first time Charles leaves for a race, his body aching for Charles and he refuses to eat until charles comes back, so after that, Max always comes along! Charles being possessive of Max but Max is almost worse the other way around and wears the red collar with the little bell with pride!

Love this!

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rcksmith · 4 years ago

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Nobody else — Five Hargreeves

Requests: “Hello! May I request number nine from the fluff prompts and number seven from the smut prompts for Five? Maybe where the reader is a super skilled fighter, and the other Hargreeves siblings can’t get over how amazing she is, but that causes Five to become a little jealous?”

“Okayy if you're not tired of Five and smuts yet, can I request 18,70,74 and 84 from smut list with fem reader?”

Fluff prompts:

9. “So you're saying that girl is your girlfriend?!" "No, that girl is my wife!”

Smut prompts:

7. “The only way you’re getting off is on my thigh.”

18. “Are you sure? Once we start, i might not be able to stop.”

70. “Maybe I should leave you like this, that way anyone who wanted to use you could have a go with you. Would you like that?”

74. “I think I like you better with a gag in your mouth.”

84. “Let me show you what happens to little brats who don’t follow the rules.”

A/N: We not tolerate any pedophilia here !!

I write about Five with their 20s. I write the same about the characters of Harry Potter.

Thank you for requests💖 I hope you guys like💖I decided to compile these two requests, since they were the same energy and they prompts connect to a central plot. I added all the elements that were asked for individually, and made sure that all ideas were respected and written down. Good reading.

English is not my first language, so I so sorry if have a mistake.

Requests are open. Love you ❤️

Couple: Five Hargreeves / Fem! Reader.

Warnings: explicit smut, dirty talk, bad words, fluff, fight, mention of death, jealousy.

— — — — —

People need each other to find support, comfort and understanding. Thomas Merton said: “Love is our true destiny. We do not find the meaning of life alone, but with the other. ”

And as cliché as it was, it was the truth. And that is exactly what happened to you.

It was difficult to explain how many years you had already been killing for the commission. Ever since, maybe? You did not remember a time when that work was not part of your life, your routine, your system. But you could feel, vaguely like a hazy dream, that one day the act of breathing was ... light.

Killing without conscience brought many regrets, and the weight of guilt filled your chest, making it difficult to breathe.

But you were good at that. God, you were very good. Maybe it was the endless years of training, your quick thinking, or the simple fact that you had a lot more physical stamina than the other agents. But, whatever it was, it helped you move up the board quickly.

Murdering with a gun was easy, quick, clean, and there were already many agents who did that job. For someone like you, so empowered, the commission has relocated you to more… arduous and dangerous missions.

Your job was to kill those whose gunshots could not show up at the necropsy. Someone who needed to die without the body revealing what had happened very well.

Shoot JFK? It wasn't with you.

End Hitler? It wasn't your job.

To kill Socrates with your bare hands and make everyone believe it was poison? This is where you came in.

The difference between the jobs was that you had to do the whole process. And a melee interaction instead of a weapon always brought people who wanted to fight for their lives. And that is why the commission chose you to do that, without any partner.

They elected you because you fought like a super soldier, focused on your goal like a robot, and never came back without success. It didn't matter how many fights you had to fight with your target, how many punches you had to throw and also take, or how many injuries you returned. You always won.

Over time, you learned things in practice, tricks that made it easy, scams that would save you effort. You learned to study each person in seconds, find their weaknesses, and use his own strength against them.

That's when you met Five Hargreeves. And Thomas Merton's quote made sense.

You two were so much similar. Both the best in their fields, wrecked in a sea of personal traumas, buried by a job that got the best of you two. You two felt misunderstood, alone in the vastness of that world. And when you two met... well, were no longer alone.

You two got involved, in all possible ways and ways. Loved each other, adored each other, and completed each other. Life went out of automatic mode, and for the first time in a long time, you two managed to breathe lightly. The food now tasted good, the heat of the sun on the skin was now better, and the world... the world was ruled by the red color of love.

So it became the most obvious and coherent decision to you two get married. Five could no longer imagine a life in which you did not exist, and you did not know how the world could go without him.

“I can't believe we did that!” You laughed, astonished, as you entered the apartment that you and Five shared.

You two had just married, something just for you two and the ceremonialist. You two chose something very intimate, reserved. And now the ring on him left hand looked like the most beautiful thing in the world for you.

Five laughed softly, hands moving up your arms, bringing you closer.

“We did. Wife.”

After that, your two contract with the commission changed. Five would only continue to do that if no one dared to touch a hair of yours, and you swore to The Handler that if someone did something to Five, you would destroy that place brick by brick.

Five saw in you a strong and atrocious ocean, which could swallow whole cities only with the force of its fury. And he liked that. He liked having someone as competent and firm as he was. Five liked to know that if there was a disaster, he would not be the only one who would go after a solution.

You were the type who knew that if you wanted things to happen, you had to do it with your bare hands. And Five loved it, because he felt understood. He carried so many responsibilities on his back that it was relieving to find someone who also felt the same things.

Five knew that, when him found way home, you were going with him. And you went. You two exchanged vows that would be together in joy and sadness, in any situation. And if the situation now said to go to 2019, well, you would.

“It makes me so sick, God!” Five heard you say when you two fell out of that blue portal he created.

He would have laughed if his muscles didn't hurt so much. For someone so trained you got sick of his powers very quickly.

"Five?!” And then the voice of one of the brothers was heard.

And that's how you two ended up there. A week later, in the Hargreeves' living room, with Diego swearing that you wouldn't be able to beat him in a fight.

Five laughed against the margarita's straw, sitting comfortably at the bar, giving up on telling his stupid brother that you had already killed much more dangerous people with your bare hands.

“I do not want to hurt you.” You smiled understandingly, and Klaus laughed.

“I bet 50 bucks that she beats your ass, Diego.” It was only logical that he was going to encourage his brother to fall.

“There is no way you can hurt me.” Diego guaranteed, getting up and starting to push the sofa away, making room for a fight.

“Are you up for it or are you scared?” He played with you, and Five laughter it back there, having a lot of fun.

“This is ridiculous, Diego.” Allison stressed, but it was obvious that she wanted to watch too.

You smirked, getting up from the bar chair next to Five. You didn't want to defeat your husband's brother in that fight, you understood that the circumstances between the two of you were not fair.

You were created to kill, injure and decimate. Body wrestling was your job and it wouldn't be fair to Diego. You knew, from Five, that the Hargreeves were created to be heroes. Saviors of the motherland. Hurt and kill if necessary, but don't make it a goal.

But not with you. Killing was your goal, always. And your weapon was not super powers or pistols, but the body itself.

“Okay.” You laughed and went to the circle that Diego had made “But I don't want to hurt you. The first one to fall to the ground loses.” You were trying to be peaceful.

Diego agreed, giving him a friendly smile before saying:

“But I will use my knives to distract you.”

It was logical that he wouldn't make it cheap and easy, even if it was for himself, you knew that.

So you agreed, took off the suit you were wearing and rolled up the sleeves of your white dress shirt, while the Hargeeves sat in a safe area, away from that makeshift ring.

Diego delivered the first blow, and you just deflected the trunk, taking him by the same arm and twisting it against his back. At that moment, if it was something for real, you would put more strength to break the bone, but you didn't want to hurt him, so you just released Diego with a little push forward.

Diego turned to face you again, the naughty smile on the face of someone who knows his own potential. He was very good, you knew that, but the different upbringing made you a better opponent.

This time, the blow came from below. It was a trip that you jumped while pulling on the fist he used to land another blow in the same second, forcing him to come forward with force while you deflecting once more. Diego staggered forward, steadying himself on the floor once again.

It was all absurdly fast, as if you were a robot. A machine programs for that.

Diego hurled the knife in the wind while attacking with his other fist. You dodged again, but this time you struck back, slamming a blow down the side of your stomach, blocking his attack with your other arm and unleashing a kick in the chest, which made Diego stagger backward.

In a matter of seconds, the knife was at the end of its course. And while Diego was advancing again, the wind that the knife was making hit your hair. But the knife didn't finish course. You stopped the blade with your hand, holding to the object with your palm.

At that moment, you saw Diego's eyes falter. And a surprised gasp by the Hargreeves graces the ambience. Then it was your turn to attack. You threw the knife on the floor, driving the blade into the wooden floor as you went.

There were punches, deflected blows, creeps. The two of you were dancing to an agitated song, which was reaching its climax.

Diego had holding you in him arms, and you turned your body, locked him left arm in your hands while you used the momentum to propel your legs up, past his neck and turning, taking you both to the floor. He fell on his back while you used your own momentum to balance yourself, standing upright.

“YES! YOU OWM ME 50 DOLLARS!" Klaus's voice was heard.

You laughed, and you were about to walk away when Diego dug his left hand into your heel. He pulled you in a single stroke, and it made you fall, your back hitting the ground as he took the lead. Diego put his legs on your hips the first second you fell on the floor, and he used his own strength to keep you there.

You laughed out loud, and so did he.

“This is cheating!” You scolded him, punching him in the chest.

“Whatever, but you had to fall too!”

Diego was a good loser, you recognized that by the intonation of the voice. He was not possessed or reviled because you won, but he wanted it to be an eye for an eye, even if only as a joke.

But as soon as Diego got up off you, holding your hand for you got up too, your eyes went to Five. And you found the green irises burning in an atrocious fire. You frowned, not understanding, but you didn't have time to go over there and ask what happened. Klaus and Luther came to you and Diego.

Klaus charging his brother and Luther asking you how you did that final blow.

“It's for me to use when he pisses me off!” Luther looked directly at his brother in a silent threat “ But he will not get up alive!”

“Fuck you” Diego said before practically shoving 50 dollars in Klaus's face.

“Is easy.” You replied Luther “I'll show you."

But while the brothers were having fun, marveling at you, Five burned in a visseral cholera.

Wasn't it enough for Diego to have literally been on top of you, you had to want to teach that stupid gorilla too ?!

Oh fucking no!

When Diego went to Luther and started explaining with you, him your side, how the scam worked, Five was exploding. Now that stupid men butcher knife would be on your side?! Agreeing and explaining whit you as if it were your husband?!

Wasn't it enough just fucking being on top of you?!

Definitely fuck not!

“Take it easy, buddy.” Klaus appeared beside him “You are looking at them as if you want to kill someone.”

Five just snarled, not bothering to respond, his eyes never leaving you.

“Wait..." Klaus looked better at who Five was staring “Are you jealous of Y/n ?!” He was amazed.

“Shut up!” Five forced himself to swallow a handful of margarita.

“Oh my God!” And he wouldn’t stop “You like her! That must be why you live in a bad mood! You must be in the friend zone! ”

“Didn't I tell you to shut up already ?!” Five looked deathly at his brother “And I'm not in the friend zone with her.”

But Five realized that he gaved too much information to his brother, because now Klaus's face was opening in a shocked smile.

Goddam!

“So you're saying that girl is your girlfriend ?!" Klaus was loving the situation.

But, out of the corner of his eye, Five can see Diego holding your arm, showing Luther the place to deliver any stupid blow.

You gotta be fucking kidding!

“No, that girl is my wife!” Five tapped the margarita glass on the counter, teleporting to you and pushing Diego's hand off your arm, replacing his own.

“The show over!” He growled as he left the room, pulling you with him, your feet stumbling a few times before picking up the pace.

“Five!” You said, but he didn't seem to hear.

The image of Diego's legs at your fucking waist, the body sitting on you, the hand on your arm, rewound Five's mind like a curse. He felt his anger inflate, jealousy whispering in the back of his neck like a little devil, making him see the situation bigger than it really was.

You called him again, but for Five, it was like you called his brother's name. And then he exploded in his own fury.

He couldn't wait to go up all those stupid stairs, all those corridors, Five just pulled you against him, disappearing in the blue flash and reappearing in the his room.

“You are crazy?” You pulled the wrist out of his grip.

“I should be asking you that!” He said “Did you see that scene ?!”

“What a scene?” You frowned.

Five focused his eyes on you, in angry energy.

“Diego on top of you, fuck!" He snarled “Luther drooling like a dog on you!”

“Five.” You thought all that was absurd “They are your brothers!”

“You have no idea how much i don’t give a fuck!”

The situation was ridiculous, and you ended up laughing in disbelief and bewilderment.

“We were fighting!” You defended yourself "Nobody was drooling on me!"

“I swear to god tha ...” Five walked over to you, his eyes flooded with rage, his body enveloped in that intense and explosive energy.

You lifted chin to get a better look, your chest stuck to him, Five's breath hitting the top of your nose. That week had been full of emotions and issues to deal with, 24 hours being insufficient to do everything, explain everything. And, well, you and Five didn't have much time alone...

All of this compiled with the fact that your husband possessed the beauty of an angry god,and that excited you so fuck absurdly.

Suddenly, the air in the room became caustic, seething with the expectation of something improper happening, injecting heat into your chest that descended to the middle of your legs.

You sighed softly, and Five immediately noticed the waters where your thoughts were sailing.

“Does it turn you on?” His voice was hoars “See me angry?”

The sigh you gave was your whistleblower, your chest started to rise and fall more breathlessly than usual, your core starting to pulse. You wouldn't be able to say anything even your life would depended it, you drowning in the malicious and hot climate of that room, compiled with the absurd beauty and intensity of the adult in front of you.

God, you needed him!

“Yes, you like.” Five had an arrogant, boastful tone, mocking how sensitive you were.

But his eyes took on a more conscious tone, and he whispered as he said: "Are you sure? Once we start, I might not be able to stop. ”

Five knew his own limits, his own anger, his own strength. If he touched you now, in most simple, he wouldn't be able to stop. You agreed, hands moving gently up his body, resting on him hips.

“I will not be gentle.” Five wanted to you know again.

He had already fucked you hard, drowned in insatiable desire, marking your skin with slaps, hickeys. Five had already mistreated your mouth, made you scream. But never fucked you in anger. He never took his anger out on you. And now, submerged in jealousy, he knew how much strength he would discharge on you.

“I don't want it to be.” But you gave Five the go-ahead on a needy sigh, your fingers running around his waist.

Five dropped his mouth to your ear, tracing a path across your skin with warm lips, now bringing hands up to your skin, feeling how hot, needy you were.

“You're wet and I haven't even touched you yet.” His words hung over you like a warm warning of what was going to happen, what to expect.

You moaned softly, your body shivering, screaming for you to get more, seeking some friction, some contact. Then, as if Five read you thoughts, his left hand clung fiercely to the back of your neck, curling him fingers in your hair.

He forced you to look at him, watching the rage and the extraordinary lust.

“Let me show you what happens to little brats who don’t follow the rules.”

Five left you brutally, telling you to take off all your clothes, watching all your movements while he got rid of the shirt himself. He left him tie beside the bed, sitting on the mattress and pulling you onto him lap as soon as you finally got naked. He fit thigh in the middle of your legs, making you sit on his thigh.

You groaned, the friction in the place you most wanted, the core pulsing against the dark cloth of him pants. You rummaged your hips for more than you wanted, but Five dropped his hand on your ass, releasing a loud, stinging slap. The groan was unable to be controlled, and you buried your face in the curve of him neck, sobbing there.

“You will be grateful for every slap I give you, do you understand?” He snarled, fingers tightening on your flesh, marking your skin.

You agreed, and thanked him when Five slapped your ass harder. This time, he moved him thigh beneath you, brushing your pulsating core, leaving you in an extremely needy state.

“Fi-five!" A sob escaped, followed by another thanks when a slap hit your in ass again.

Five's hands roughly grabbed your waist, holding you firmly in place as he started to rummage in him thigh, making you moan louder every second. That was torture. You pulsed and wet him thigh, your body rigid from wanting more of that friction, the sobs escaping your lips, the muscles contracted.

“Such a needy slut." He snarled in your ear “So desperate for my thigh.”

You groaned at him words, your fingers around him shoulders, squeezing there while Five took you so badly in him thigh. He dropped his mouth to your hot neck, pouring a hickey there before sighing hoarsely:

“The only way you're getting off is on my thigh."

It sent electric currents to your swollen core, and moans got even bigger when Five increased the speed of his movements, rubbing your clitoris in those mind-boggling movements. His strong grip, compiled wheezing on his neck, his hoarse voice and the movements of his thigh took you to the limit. And you were pushed into that abyss of the climax.

“So fucking quickly.” Five delighted, in a groan, and stuck his hands on your back, holding you there, turning you in one movement to the bed.

Your back hit the mattress, Five’s warm hands roamed your legs, squeezing thighs and parting them, exposing your wet, red core at the climax. Five groaned loudly, as if seeing you hurt physically, and he took his hands off you to grab the tie next to you.

“Be good and open your mouth for me.” You obeyed, and he wiped the cloth over there, fastening his tie.

You sighed brokenly, your heart beating fast, breasts stiff and sore, your ass burning with slaps, core sensitive to climax.

“I think I like you better with a gag in your mouth." Five reflected, him hands roaming your trembling body, squeezing every bit of skin, reveling in how your skin felt at him touch.

Five reveled in the breath you took, enjoying how you looked like a fucking goddess like that. So vulnerable, so needy, so needy.

He was controlling himself until now, pushing you to the limit, making you sensitive, teasing you, making you sensitive to what was coming. Him smile was purely lustful, and Five leaned toward you, roughly sucking the nipple from your breast, nibbling at the needy skin. Then he brought hands up to his pants, opening his belt and zipper, pulling the pieces down far enough for his dick to pop out.

The moan you gave when you felt the hot, luscious member on your thigh was enough to inflate him ego even more. Five turned your body down, pulling your waist up, leaning into your ear to whisper:

“I'm going to fuck you so hard that you'll never forget that day.” Then he entered you, rough, strong, badly.

He forced your walls to get used to him size and sank to the bottom of the well, clutching his hands to your hips and pulling you against him dick. You screamed against the tie, pressing your fingers to the pillows, sobbing when Five set a fierce, wild and badly pace, mistreating every inch of you.

One of him hands went to your neck, closing his fingers there and pouring out all the fury and jealousy he felt in the thrusts, going in as deep as he could and pushing your limit. The pornographic sounds of the two of you moaning, the sound of his hip hitting your ass, invaded the room, mixing with the smell of sex, lust and hunger.

You shouted him name when Five left and brutally entered you, making you choke on your own sobs.

“What's it? Are you unaccustomed to my dick?” He tasted it, leaving your neck to slap your ass aggressively “Is it too much for you?”

You sobbed, stopped by the tie, and Five hit you again.

“Do you think someone can fuck you like me?!”

Now him voice was angry and his movements too. Five fucked you like he had spent his whole life in fury at you, waiting patiently for the day when he would discount everything on you. Him hand went to your mouth, pulling tie from there and releasing your toxic moans.

“Answer me, fuck!” One more slap, leaving your ass on fire.

“N-no!” You cried “Nobody ... no-nobody fucks me like you!”

You talks with a more thrust, and Five pushed your chest to the bed, keeping his hand on your back, him moans mixing with your.

Then he reached the peak of anger.

Five came out of you, turned you up and bent your legs, placing your knees on your shoulders. He entered in a brutal way inside you, the new position making him occupy all the minimum vacant spaces. You screamed, tears welling up in your eyes, your hands tightening on his arms, your heart already racing.

It was too much. Your body begged for more, for the climax, for the lust, for anything fierce that Five could give you. He dropped his mouth on yours, biting your bottom lip instead of kissing you, making you swallow his lines when he said:

“Maybe I should leave you like this, that way anyone who wanted to use you could have a go with you. Would you like that? ”

You desperately denied it. Five could very well come out of you and not let you come, and just that thought made your body tremble and tears flow.

“Plea-Please!” You sobbed “I beg you!”

That did things with Five. He stuck his body to your, him arm going around your waist and fucking you as if that could chase away all his anger. This time he kissed you, sticking his lips to yours as he felt you pulse around him and break up in a hushed scream, trembling at the climax.

Five did not falter, his black hair clinging to his forehead with sweat, his heart pounding. He cum strongly inside your core, filling you with hot cum. You groaned, wrapping your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss as he came inside of you, slowly calming down.

The two of you sighed, the room flooding with the smell of sex and desire, your hearts thudding at the same pace. You whimpered in his mouth, and when Five want to leave inside you, you denied it, tightening your legs around him waist.

“N-No.” You moaned softly, "Stay inside, please."

Five drew air through his teeth, him hands gripping the sides of your body, stirring inside you, beginning to feel the lust rising.

He kissed you again, whispering:

“You want to have a child of mine, don't you?" It was an arrogant, provocative voice, and you sighed. “You are such a fucking sensitive little thing.”

Then Five started moving again, and you stayed in that room for much longer.

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kittehkwrites · 4 years ago

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Streets

“No Final Fantasy can we end these games though? ” - Doja Cat, ‘Streets’ (2019)

Summary: Trevante finally decides to say something, revealing to you how he feels and it leads to something the both of you only thought could happen in your dreams.

Warnings: Fluff, angst?, smut

Can be read as a stand alone, or as a continuation to Like I Want You

No backing down now. He thought.

I've been goin' through some things

I struggle with my inner man

“I have something that I have to get off my chest.” He said.

There was no hint of playfulness laced in his voice like usual.

No this was serious and it made you shiver.

Trevante couldn’t help but still get nervous around you and it took everything in him to not kiss you again.

The feeling of your soft lips gently caressing his back in shock but with such fluid motion and the current running between you both was something you wouldn’t mind feeling again.

Baby, we tried to fight it

We all been there some days

“ I like you. Ok? I’ve liked you since we started hanging out more and i got to know you more but

Thought I needed something else

And acted like I was okay

“But I always thought you weren’t interested in me like that cause you’d always call be your friend and yea there may have been a few times of playful flirtin but I figured that just how it’d be with us and i didnt want to say anything when you would talk to me about those assholes you’d go one dates with and clearly didn’t know how to treat you”

We just had to work it out

“If I knew this was how you’ve felt, or what you thought we could’ve saved us so much time and mindless pinding over the wrong people...”

You thought of all the times you went on those dead-end dates with guys that couldn’t hold a conversation to save their life or the ones that talked so much that it irritated you to no end and how you’d go to Tre and he’d be there. Waiting on you with open arms, hanging onto your every word and giving you advice.

That’s why you thought he didn’t feel the same. What man would be so selfless?

You wanted to leave and try to move on in hopes of protecting yourself when really you were causing more problems and you could’ve potentially caused him to lose interest..

And baby, I needed space

“I’m sorry for trying to basically avoid you at every cha-”

“It’s alright. I guess you wanted to protect yourself from disappoint like you’d normally be on the receiving end of, but i'm not them and I can definitely��say that without a doubt, you’d be my queen and not second fiddle against the juvenile excuses some of those dicks told you back then.” He was right. He’d always treat you so nicely and you misread it as friendly behaviour when for him he didn’t want to run. He wanted to stay out of fear that someone would take you away or treat you in a way you didn’t deserve.

There was a bit of silence between the two of you.

You're pouring your heart out

“we are idiots aren't we?” You both laughed, breaking the silence and it made you both feel lighter knowing you’ve spoke your peace and to have the next person feel the same made you want to float above the clouds even more than you were now.

“I guess we are, but it makes it interesting.” He said, softly in your direction.

His smile was gracing his face and it made you melt to know that he felt the same and to know that he was there even when you tried to leave, made you feel so dumb to keeping your mouth closed about how you felt and you were sure your friends knew but wanted to leave you both to doing what you were doing incase they were wrong.

You held me so down

All those nights you’d go to him about those aint shit niggas that wasted your time...

So down I never grew

You didn’t see that as a sign of his attraction. Just as a sign of his friendly nature and you blamed it on your lack of healthy relationships before meeting this great man that you knew no one could compare to.

Yon knew that no one else could hold you down like he did.

I tried to find out

All those guys were nothing.

They meant nothing like the man sitting next you did in your whole time of having feelings for him but you wanted to make sure that it wasn’t you that was self-sabotaging these short term talking stages or relationships, if you can even call them that.

When none of them came through

But it wasn’t you. You thought, as you looked at his structured face, glancing over every little feature from his eyebrows to the hairs in his beard. They just weren’t him and you knew that now.

now I'm stuck in the middle

And baby had to pull me out Like you

That night brought on an onslaught of feelings and emotions but you both remained outside until your friends called it a night and he sobered up to drop you back to your place.

The ride was comfortably silent with fluttering glances and the soft music playing through the speakers made you feel safe and right about the future of this “friendship” between you two.

Like you

Over the next few days, you both facetimed, called, texted whatever way you could keep communication open, you both did it and it was like old times again, except you both knew the others feelings and it changed from “friendly” to him essentially courting you in a way you both hadn’t put an exact label on but you both knew it was exclusive and no one could break that apart.

After a few dates and some more group hangout, you both managed to agree on having a “sleepover”, but this time it wouldn’t be like normal ; no friends or interruptions, just the two of you and it made you nervous but excited for the days to hurry past.

The days indeed were passing quickly and you made sure to pack an extra set of clothes and some nice undergarments incase you got the chance to change into it, or you’d have another opportunity to wear it for him and you knew he’d appreciate it with the way he always compliments you and your body when given the chance and it made you even more sure that he was the one that was it for you as he didn’t comment on the weight but when you wouldn’t be noticeably be eating a lot around him because you were worried about your college work and submissions he’d subtly give you food during the shared study sessions you’d have with him and your other friends. Similarly, you’d make sure he was eating when he had finals or a sports event.

You guys felt that bonding and caring was leading towards the formation of something beautiful and stable.

When the day finally came, you told him you'd forget to mention the offsite visit you’d be taking to see an exhibit on african american and afro-caribbean art being held for the month

He was happy that you were happy.

The way you were gushing about the work you’d see and how the artists all incorporated the ideas of the diaspora, feeling lost but building some form of unity in their situations brought chills to you and the other students that accompanied the tour.

He loved seeing your pictures that you sent when you got there and when you got the chance, you’d take pictures with the artists and creators.

He knew you’d forget to text him when you reached back to the campus or if he’d need to come get you, to which you’d appreciate seeing as the others seemed to want to stay longer than you had hoped and others had already gone and you didn’t feel like getting in other people’s cars that you werent too close with.

Could you come for me in the next hour?

You asked and saw the three dots before his text came through.

Send your location.

That was his text to you and you weren’t about to lie and say you didn’t feel the little “flutters” as you pictured him laid up and thinking about you like you were him.

Location sent.

This is it. You thought.

No holding back. You convinced yourself, mentally as you continued moving around the exhibit to look at the other pieces you didn’t get the chance to yet when you guys were allowed to take a break as they were opening up some of the other areas for public viewing now

Closed mouths don’t get fed and you were hungry you argued as you saw his latest text that he was on his way, wondering where the time went but anticipating the activities you’d both get into.

You began to look around a few more times before making your way to the front of the building after saying your ‘bye’s, nice to meet you’s and see you later’s.

Leisurely walking to the front you stayed in the cool conditioned air of the building, awaiting the man that managed to continuously surprise you with his bold, straightforward nature.

Glad I brought my bag and waxed the other day so no worries about any fuzz being down there, if things went as you’d hope, you thought before opening the glass door seeing the next he was around the corner and then seeing him pull up to the front.

He pulled up to the front of the building as you made your way outside of the facility.

You watched as he got out of the 1973 Chevrolet Impala you would often watch him work on,

or he’d offer to take you in to go on those long drives that would make you think things once you saw him drive with one hand and his seat back.

Like you said, it made you think things.

He came over to you and walked you back in silence.

Damn papa, you a rare breed, no comparing

The cool air brushing over his exposed arms.

The wind carrying his scent that hit you as you slightly trailed behind him, before coming up to the car door and opening it for you while taking your bag and placing it in the back.

And it’s motherfuckin’ scary

He shut both doors and made his way round to the drivers side, getting in and buckling up himself before stealing a quick glance at you as you did the same.

“Ready.” The click of your seatbelt heard before your voice altered him.

He looked over at you, one hand on the gear stick, and the other on the wheel before racking his dark pupils over your shy-seated form. You saw as he but his plush bottom lip before his lips formed a smirk that made your thighs clench.

She better be ready. He thought as he knew that this shy act you had going on was only turning him on more and he wanted to hear that sweet voice of yours yell his name like he dreamed.

Y’all made it back to his and you were met with the warmness and enticing scents coming from within his space.

“I made your favourite.” He watched you walk in slowly, eyeing you again before waking in the light trail of your perfume and body lotion that left you smelling like candy and he wanted to have his dessert now.

You were so consumed with what he said and what he’d done that you hadn’t responded. He turned and looked to you as he made his way ahead when you stood frozen at what he had done for you when you thought no one would ever do such a thing.

Tryna keep him 'cause I found him

“Princess?” There goes that nickname that had you shivering slightly and gave him a chance to openly gaze into your beautiful eyes with a look of confusion at your silence in regards to food.

“Huh? Oh! No! that’s great. I was starving.” You expressed and progressed to his smaller dining room, still shocked at the set up of your favourite laid out and you knew it wasn’t order either because you’ve watched this man cook and always taste tested so you knew you weren’t about to be dissapointed.

“I told you to stop starving yourself. You need me to start bringing you lunches again?” He cared. The fact that this fine, tall, dark and handsome man was willing to come to you and bring you lunch still was getting you all warm, along with the delicious food that was hitting the spot.

This man is bout to get it, you thought before sitting and enjoying the food he prepared.

Both sitting under the dimmed lights and intimate atmosphere he managed to create with what he had, intensified your emotions and the glasses of wine you had with dinner got you to loosen up.

He didn’t want to force conversation. He was ok with just being in your presence and for that, you knew he was the one and you’d do anything to keep him happy and ‘Let a ho know I ain't motherfuckin' sharing’ (or whatever it is Doja Cat said.) You’d thought as he ushered you to his couch after collecting the plates and placing them in the sink before returning to you.

He saw you and couldn’t help but think about you being his. Like actually his.

I could take you to the parents, then to Paris

Plan a motherfuckin' wedding

Tonight i’m gonna make her mine and there’s no doubt about it.

He sat so close and for a second, you felt those shocks you felt the night he first kissed you when your legs touched.

You couldn't help but look at him and see the burning desire he had in his eyes. It was the same for him, seeing your deep pools looking at him with adoration and contemptment that he wanted to fall to his knees and beg for your love, even though he could guess you loved him the way he did you.

You the type I wanna marry (Yeah) and keep you merry

I'll put the ring on when you ready

There was a split second.

Then clothes began to drop around your retreating forms, leading to his room.

The kisses were hard and passion filled. Hands grasping body parts.

Hot skin against hot skin.

The soft glow of the candle he’d lit in his room providing him with enough light to tell that you were ok with this but he still had to make sure

“You sure about this babygirl? Cause once we start...I don’t know if i’ll be able to stop.” He voice dropped many octaves and resonated deep in your soul to the point of setting off a gush between your legs that had you mindlessly nodding your head at the man.

“Words Princess.” He gripped your chin and kept that intense eye contact.

“Yes sir.” The name set off something in him and he had you flung across his mattress, head between your legs and hands gripping your thighs while he kept his eyes on your face contorting in pleasure.

We play our fantasies out in real life ways and

No Final Fantasy, can we end these games though?

He made you cum with a powerful orgasm but you knew he could do better and he knew that he was just warming you up for one of the best nights of your life...besides marrying him and having kids together.

THAT’S how sure of himself he was that he’d ruin you for anyone else.

Could you blame him tho? He finally has you how he’s been dreaming about and he isn’t gonna hold back in let you know how much you mean to him. He’s gonna make sure you feel his love for you like he’s been saying.

You give me energy, make me feel lightweight (Woo)

He saw you come down enough to get on your knees, staring into his face like he was yours.

You saw your essence glistening in his facial hair, the moonlight that made its way in and added to the soft glow of the candle made him look like a beautiful shade of blue and near obsidian black.

Your hands making their way up his sculpted arms, joining at the chest and making their way down his sculpted torso, leading to his happy trail and the prominent tent in his jeans that you couldn’t help but rub your palm against.

“No teasing, Princess.” His voice snapped you out of your day dream of the erect member laying between his thick thighs, encased by the light washed jeans.

You looked up at him through innocent eyes and you swear you saw his pupils dilate even more, overtaken by lust as he brought his hand up your stomach, corse palms over your delicate skin and thick fingers wrapping around your neck for a tight squeeze before he gently pushed you back onto the bed once he saw you close those pretty eyes and bit your lip at the action.

Like the birds of a feather, baby

He pulled you closer to the edge of the bed before he started to remove his denim bottoms. Eyes never leaving yours as he pushed his jeans down his muscular legs, taking his boxers off at the same time before standing at attention once kicking them off.

You couldn’t help but look down at the one-eyed monster between his legs and he took notice at the way you looked at him.

He gripped the base of it before calmly saying “Don’t worry baby. You’re a big girl and I know you can take it.” His hand pumping slowly at the look in your eyes and the wetness between your legs.

He grabbed a condom from the nightstand, rolling it over his tip causing you to let out a whine at not being able to feel his girth in your mouth.

“Don’t worry Princess, you can have a taste later. Right not i want to feel that sweet pussy gripping this fat dick, that alright?” He said a soft voice but it was gruff that it had you getting slick even more at the dominance he had in that moment and the way he put receiving on the backburner.

You just nodded you head and he got close to you to rub his tip between your folds, lubricating the condom with what you supplied. It was a sight for him that he had to think of anything besides busting in the condom then and there.

We real life made for each other

He made you look at him before pushing into your wet valley. He took his time as you relaxed and felt every hot inch insert itself so deliciously slow.

And it's hard to keep my cool

You weren’t going to lie and say you didn’t like the gentle strokes he was giving to let you adjust, however you knew he wanted to go faster and harder if he was as sexually frustrated as you were from subpar partners.

Cause you’re a one in a million

There ain't no man like you

It was like he was reading your mind.

After he noticed you moving your bottom half off the bed to meet his strokes, he grabbed your legs, placing them over your shoulder, not missing a beat and going deeper into your depths.

“Oh shit tre!” He had to let out a breathy chuckle before he felt you grip his dick with your tight walls. That caused his body to jerk even deeper before he could process it and had him releasing a deep grunt you don’t think you’ve ever heard from him before.

“Shit Princess. Got this tight pussy grippin me like this? Who said you could do that?” He was gonna make sure you knew who was incharge in the bed room but you had a surprise for him when you were able to catch him off with the slip of a whispered ‘daddy!’ that made his hips stutter and him lose focus.

You were able to get him on his back, his large member not slipping from your clenching muscles and managed to start grinding on the massive amount of muscle lying beneath you.

“I did. Nigga” You went in after that.

Trevante watched in awe at the way you were taking him, knowing this position meant you’d definitely feel him in your gut if you sat completely over his pulsing, thick pole.

You planted your feet on either side of his hips, hands moving through the wisps of hair sprayed across his chest and switched the pace of your movements.

Up. Down and grind then up again.

He wasn’t going to lie and say that you were riding him like the perfect woman, like he’d always imagine after hearing about the way a woman could trap a man with good sex, he finally believed it with you over him.

That intense i contact was adding to the pleasure for you both and he couldn’t help himself. He brought his hand down on your ass quick and hard before gripping the round flesh in his hands and picking you up to lay back on the bed again before he started to pound into you faster once he saw your eyes rolling back and felt your pussy clenching him even harder.

“You gonna cum on this dick babygirl? Huh?! Answer me and take it like a big girl!”

all you could do was nod your head and repeatedly chant “Yes Yes Yes Yes” even after he finished speaking to you.

You layed under him a blubbering mess but wanting to prove to him you weren’t a punk.

“Cum on this dick Princess. I want to feel that pretty pussy cum all over this -fUCK! THAT’S RIGHT!-yea cum on this dick! Make it yours bitch!”

That word did something for you.

“I’M CUMMING.”

“Then cum bitch.” He whispered into your ear and it ignited the spasms and feeling of pure bliss of release.

He watched you convulse under him and he felt his sack tighten at the way your face looked that he couldn’t take his eyes off yours even for a second.

“Look at me bitch! I said look at me!” He gripped your cheeks between his large hand and got you to face him, seeing your dazed state and then he recognized you were going to cum again.

“You gonna cum again? You like this? Huh?” He waited and raised his leg onto the bed, bending it and forcing your legs to go wider by taking them from around his hips.

He had you so confused in this position.

You didn’t know if you wanted to run or stay there but you knew it had you cumming closer. Then you felt a smack to the face.

“I asked you a question! Answer me!” His loud voice, deep and all baritone like bounced off the walls at his command.

“Yeees I’M CUMMING!” You responded, equally loud you were sure the neighbours would hear but they should mind the business that pays them you thought.

You were getting the pounding of your life and didn’t want to have to stop because of nosey people calling security to check on the unit.

If they didn’t know what was going on, then that’s tough. But you were gonna make sure you got railed well tonight.

He didn’t know what came over him but he had to say it

“You love this dick baby? You love how I feel inside you?” His voice was still deep but that roughness made you tingle and he felt the flutter of your walls over him

“Yes!” You squeaked out.

“FUCK! I feel that pussy gripping me even tighter!”

He looked at you and you managed to pry your eyes open and stare into his as he said what he felt was right in that moment.

“You wanna be my girl? Huh?” His eyes still held list in them, but there was a softness as he slowed down to ask this, coming closer to you to pepper kisses over your face and embrace you.

“Yes!” You loved the way he felt but you wanted him to go harder so when you pleaded “Harder Tre! Please? I need you to go harder” He fixed his position and granted you your wish by pounding into you harder and faster, his gentle thrusts out the window and your ecstasy written all over your face.

You tried pushing his hips away but he smacked your hands away, grabbing both wrists and coming to you closer and to your ear.

“You gonna cum when I tell you to? You gonna be a good girl for me?” He watched you in pleasure of maintaining his composure and not cumming the first minute he sunk into your velvety pussy that he couldn’t even manage would feel so heavenly as it does now.

“Yes” You sounded so pathetic and it turned you on more than you thought possible at being so dominated but the big heap of dark, thick hefty muscle plowing into you made you feel safe even with his belittling of you but you knew it was only for the sex.

“Yeah? My girl huh? You’re so pretty under me.” He whined. It was so beautiful to hear so loud into your ear in the close position he was in.

This close proximity made you feel so connected and had you tearing up a little at the fact you knew he was still being gentle with you and it brought you closer.

Trevante looked down at you and saw the cloudy look in your eyes. He knew you were cumming again and he was right there with you so he let you go and pushed one of his hands between your sweaty bodies, finding your clit and stimulating you double time to climax together.

He saw your eyes rolling back when he felt that tightness in his sack before he shouted out to you,

“CUM! CUM ON THIS DICK!” He roared out to you.

It was a rush you hadn’t been prepared for as he managed to get faster but his rhythm started to become irregular. He still managed to hit that deep spot in you that had you going crazy when his tip would rub over it and all that could be heard was you both climaxing then heavy breathing.

He continued to grind into you slowly, careful that it may hurt you but he wanted to ride out the best orgasm he’s had in awhile, and knowing that it was with you made him want to keep his dick deep in you.

If it wasn’t for the condom, he’s sure he would’ve gotten you pregnant and totally stepped up to the plate to take care of you and his seed.

Like you

He couldn’t believe that you were here, in this moment with him and he had to make sure you know that you were all he could ever want and more.

He raised up and you whimpered at the loss of warmth he provided and the way his body calmed you down after such a session.

“None of that.” He said, leaning back down to place a gentle kiss to you lips “I’ll be back Princess” and then slowly pulling out of you to tie the condom and through it away.

You couldn't help but watch his retreating form go into the bathroom and come back with a damp rag to wipe you up and then leave the room to get you some water and lay back in the bed with you next to him.

You both stared at eachother once he got back in the bed and you managed to fix yourself in a comfortable position, not caring about the sweat or the way you may look like a mad woman.

Instead, you brought your hand up to his cheek and watched as he closed his eyes before puckering his lips, leaning to you for a kiss that you happily gave him and he pulled you to lay on his chest.

He thought you had fallen asleep as you hadn’t moved in a while and knew he had to catch some sleep to if he wanted to get up early and make you something for breakfast.

He planted a soft kiss onto your forehead, gripping you tighter and released a content sigh.

I found it hard to find someone like you

He wasn’t going to let you go and for a moment he thought he heard you say something but he passed it off as fatigue from the intense session the both of you just carried out after months of sexual frustration and tension.

Trevante didn’t know that you were still awake and said that you loved him

I can't be without you

You knew you weren’t gonna run anymore and he was it. Your one in a milllion and you would do everything to keep him, like he would you.

He held you tighter before finally closing his eyes, a small smile on his face.

And I can't be without you

He hadn’t heard you say you loved him...

but that’s neither here nor there.

You’d be alright with saying it again when you both were awake and not high off sexual energy.

Like you.

Taglist:

@killmonger-fics

@browngirldominion

(Dm to be added to the permanent taglist or let me know which actors/characters you’d want me to tag you in when I write)

——————————————————————————

Hey y’all!

Sorry this took so long🥴 Been busy with uni and some other personal stuff so I put this off longer than intended🥴

But what’d you think, hope this met the standards and was worth it?

Don’t forget to like, reblog and/or comment 😊

Hope you’re staying safe, checking in on your friends and loved ones and taking time for yourself :)))

Love you all and thanks for the support.

-K💜

#kittehkwrites #trevante rhodes #trevante rhodes x reader #black!reader #black!oc #lyric prompts #imagine #trevante rhodes smut #trevante rhodes fluff #friends to lovers trope

530 notes · View notes

uswntxfootball · 4 years ago

Text

i get a little bit stressed out (when i think about you) (jill roord x arsenal!reader)

how were you supposed to ask her out when just thinking about her made you nervous?

word count: 3342 ish

rated: F for flirtation sugar daddy

title- nervous by shawn mendes

——

your eyes followed her even when you didn’t mean for them to.

there was just something about the way she carried herself… you really just couldn’t get enough of it and-

“hello? y/n?”

you really really really had it bad. it really didn’t help that she was talking adamantly about something to viv, the other dutch forward having a relatively hard time keeping up with the taller girl.

its only when daan claps in your face that you turn and look at her.

“sorry what?”

daan face palms before saying:

“you know if you stare any harder you’re going to strain your eyes.”

you blush a little.

“i’m not staring….i’m-”

daan’s pointed look shuts you up.

you blush harder and look down at your cleats, adamantly avoiding the midfielder’s gaze.

her tone softens a little when she sees you.

“you really should just ask her out y/n. its been like two years.”

you scoff a little.

“it has not been two years what are you-“

daan cuts you off with a matter-of-fact tone:

“she joined the team in 2019 buddy.”

“yeah but that doesn’t mea-“

“and exactly how many words have you exchanged with her?”

you think before saying with an air of false confidence:

“like a lo-“

“not counting on the field.”

you sigh and hang your head in defeat before whispering:

“like two.”

the dutch midfielder hums and asks again:

“mhmm now what was that?”

you roll your eyes and say it a little louder, still with that air of defeat:

“like two words.”

daan patted your shoulder encouragingly before the whistle blew, indicating the end of break, and training picked up once again.

jill was talking about you during the break, actually.

to viv across the field from you.

the dutch forward had slowly realized that you were different around her, that you didn’t speak as much, and actually that you avoided her at all costs.

this she found out because there were instances, such as during team dinners, where if there was an open seat next to her, you didn’t take it, opting to stand or sit on the floor as far away from her as possible.

or that whenever she sat down next to you you shot up out of your seat almost instantly.

or that when you saw her coming down the hall you immediately turned and walked the way you came from.

or- you get the point.

she couldn’t tell if you hated her, because frankly that’s what it looked like.

so that’s what she was speaking to viv about.

and to lisa about.

and really anyone who would really listen.

of course, everyone knew your predicament, as you weren’t exactly subtle in your staring and stuttering.

they all assured jill that you didn’t hate her, that maybe you were just shy, something jill had a hard time believing since she watched you hold confident eye contact and conversations with literally everyone else but her.

if you were someone else maybe she would care less.

but you weren’t.

see, this is only how you acted off the field.

but on the field, you were a completely different person.

you had a confident, almost authoritative tone when you spoke, one that made everyone stop and listen, and was something that ultimately landed you the role of captain for every team you’ve ever played for, with arsenal being no exception.

you spoke to her that way too, and it was really the only time you made eye contact with her and spoke to her.

granted it was more like you giving orders and directions, but same difference really.

it was also something jill found really really hot.

so safe to say she cared about what you thought of her.

jill eventually decided that if you weren’t going to talk to her first, she’d do it instead.

and so began her quest, getting y/n y/ln to talk to her and hopefully become her friend.

you noticed the change in jill immediately.

it seemed as though the dutch forward was tailing you every chance she got.

every corner you took she seemed to appear right in front of you, every time you glanced at her it seemed as if her eyes were already on you.

it got so bad that you tried even harder to avoid her.

for instance,

one day before training you were out on the pitch shooting from midfield and muttering game analysis under your breath when you heard a familiar, heavy dutch accent making its way through the halls.

you panicked and-

daan found you ten minutes later inside a trashcan.

needless to say you had a pretty hard time trying to explain the smell and stains on your jersey to joe later that day.

in your defense because the field was so empty, that was the only plausible option in your mind.

as time went on, it really didn’t get any better.

there was another day during training where you turned to catch a glimpse of jill only to see her eyes already on you, and you turned back so abruptly that you knocked down the entire weight rack in front of you.

jill giggled, and the rest of your teammates were rolling their eyes and collectively face palming at your stupidity.

it all came to a climax when you were on the bus to your first match of the year, and jill plopped down in the seat right by you.

your eyes widened and cheeks flushed immediately, and you trained your eyes on the seat in front of you, not daring to turn and look at the girl beside you.

“hey how are you?”

you gulped and slowly looked up at her, and you cursed internally.

she was just so unfairly attractive.

the slightly shy smile and arched eyebrow was a combination you swear only she could pull off and-

“i’m doing okay, how are you?” you managed to force out.

at least you didn’t stutter.

jill gave you a lopsided smile that made your heart skip a beat, and went on talking.

she knew you weren’t much of a talker around her, and subsequently filled up all the gaps with her rambling, something that you both appreciated and hated, as it really didn’t help the queasy feeling in your stomach.

when the bus pulled to a halt you felt like you were going to puke, and shot up out of your seat wanting to run off before you freak out, only to remember that you were in the inside seat.

jill moved slightly without hesitation, something you were more than thankful for.

she whispers a little dejectedly when you get off:

“are you sure she doesn’t hate me?”

lisa gives her a sympathetic look and smile.

“she doesn’t jill.”

“but she just-“

“trust us, she doesn’t.”

jill nods a little apprehensively, and gets up and grabs her stuff, making her way off the bus along with everyone else.

during the game, jill was so distracted that she almost ran in the wrong direction.

“jill! press! now go!”

you were yelling at her from midfield, glancing all over the place as you watched every player’s movement and stance.

jill almost stumbled upon hearing your voice.

you note that she’s acting weirdly, and bring it up during a quick break while the ref is assessing a potential foul.

you catch her arm when she walks by you, an action that catches her entirely by surprise.

“hey you alright? your head is all over the place.”

jill swallows a little bit before smiling weakly and replying:

“yeah yeah i’ll be okay.”

“alright well get your head in it, you’re really talented and we really need you right now.”

you give her arm a reassuring squeeze and move to take the free kick which had just been given.

jill still stood there a little dumbfounded, its only when you snap loudly and point in the direction of the box that she remembers there’s a game going on and moves into position.

all in all, arsenal wins with an emphatic victory of 5-1.

after your duties as captain were fulfilled and you gave your post game talk, you quickly fell back into your off field self.

now why was the previous bus interaction the climax?

simply put, it had been the last straw for a lot of your teammates, who were now fed up with your idiotic gay panic, and decided to do something about it.

you should’ve known something was weird when you get a text from viv reading:

“URGENT- team meeting in 15 min at me & lisa’s apartment”

you furrowed your brows in confusion.

you were the team captain and the one who called team meetings, so what was up?

also it was saturday night, couldn’t it wait?

you texted kim, the vice captain, and pretty much the only responsible adult on the team, to double check.

she replied with:

“yes- joe told us about it.”

you furrow your eyebrows again because you took your job of captain seriously and you honestly didn’t remember joe mentioning an impromptu meeting on saturday night at viv’s house.

but you made your way there just in case anyways.

when you make your way inside you glance suspiciously around the apartment and only get more confused when you see less than half the team there.

the only people there besides viv and lisa were daan and beth, caitlin and lia, leah and jordan, and katie.

by this point you should’ve known.

you open your mouth to speak but you’re cut off when daan shoves you down into a chair.

“sit.”

you shoot back up and fight her back a little bit before asking:

“guys guys guys what is going on?”

leah calmly looked at you and said:

“sit down and we’ll tell you.”

and so you begrudgingly take a seat.

lisa starts.

“alright so collectively as a group, we decided that watching you deal with jill is making us all lose brain cells.”

the group in front of you nods adamantly in agreement.

“and so we’re here to help you. to teach you how to flirt.”

you cross your arms and snort a little.

“and how are you going to do that exactly?”

“well-“

beth piped in here.

“we’re going to employ katie and have her flirt with you and teach you for the next week or so.”

you shake your head.

“katie? no i would rather go on my own thank you very-“

katie cuts in here with an offended look.

“what do you mean no?! i’m obviously the best here and-“

the room quickly broke into a loud cacophony of sound, as they began debating about katie’s comment.

its only when lisa yells for silence that everyone quiets again.

“wait how many people are in on this?” you ask suddenly.

“the whole team with the exception of jill,” leah replies offhandedly.

your eyes nearly bugged out of your head when you heard this.

“is it really that bad?”

lia snorts.

“can birds fly?”

you let out a sigh.

“fine.”

you turn to katie and very adamantly say:

“but don’t you dare make it weird.”

katie holds her hands up in surrender.

and so it began, your “training” as they called it.

katie, surprisingly was pretty good at what she did.

she did unfortunately call herself your flirtation sugar daddy, but that really made you uncomfortable so you avoided those terms at all costs.

so day after day, katie stuck by you and flirted with you 24/7, with occasional performance evaluations from lisa and caitlin, all who approved thus far.

on the downside, jill, who had been kept out of the loop from everything, saw this as you being interested in katie.

she wanted to tell you that katie had a girlfriend, but didn’t really know how to start that conversation without making it weird.

she couldn’t just go up to you and say, “hey i’ve been watching you flirt with katie for the last few days and just so you know she’s taken.”

so she just stood by and watched.

she did ask viv about it one day though.

“does y/n know katie has a girlfriend?”

to which viv replied:

“yup.”

“so why is she flirting with her?”

“its just for fun.”

“it doesn’t look like its for fun to me.”

viv turns and looks at her dutch teammate.

“are you jealous?”

jill almost sputters out her answer.

“wh-what no of course not! why would i be jealous?!”

viv turns to hide her smile.

“sure jill. whatever you say.”

two weeks went by, and katie was delighted by your performance.

next saturday, the ten of you met up at viv and lisa’s apartment again.

“alright so you might be asking why we’ve gathered you here today!” lisa proclaimed with a very poor attempt at victorian english.

“we’re gathered here today to-“

“oh just get on with it,” viv butts in.

lisa turns to her with a glare.

“all right all right,” viv relents.

“we’re going to assess y/n’s flirtation capabilities.”

you quirk an eyebrow.

“how are you going to do that exactly?”

“ooh we didn’t actually think that far. we’re going to ask you questions?”

“what like ask me to finish the line? like ooh girl are you from tennesse cuz you’re the only ten i see?”

lia cringes a little at that line.

“what ever you do, don’t say that.”

“mhm yeah wasn’t going t-.”

leah cuts in.

“alright the point is. just be yourself y/n. you exude confidence on the field so just bring it out when you talk to her. that’s all”

the others all nod in agreement.

“that’s it really. you can do it y/n, we all believe in you.”

“thanks guys i really appreciate it.”

“wait but i can still be your flirtation sugar da-ow! you didn’t have to all hit me!”

the next day at training you were shoved and funneled in jill’s direction by almost half the team.

a particularly hard shove from daan had you slamming directly into jill.

the dutch forward turned and grabbed your waist in lightning fast speed to steady you.

your arms immediately fell to rest on hers, and you took a shallow breath in when you saw her concerned look.

“are you alright?”

“yeah i am thanks to you…”

well here goes nothing.

“…though i have to say if this is what it takes to get you to hold me i’ll gladly fall for you again.”

jill’s face was worth the burning on your cheeks.

“w-what?”

you had to admit, jill’s stutter only made her cuter.

you just gave her a wink and reluctantly pulled her arms off you.

“come on jill, we have a training session to get to.”

you gave her a final wave before you made your way out of the locker room.

jill still stood there, shocked and a little confused.

viv rolled her eyes.

“come on jill.”

and when jill didn’t move, viv just grabbed her arm and dragged her out of the room.

later during training almost the exact same thing happens.

except this time it was more jill’s fault than yours.

she wasn’t watching where she was going and ran right into you.

your hands found their way immediately on her waist.

“is this how we’re going to meet and talk from now on?”

jill blushed and mumbled a “sorry.”

you grinned.

“don’t be, i’m kind of enjoying it, though…”

you stopped to fake pondering something.

“…i don’t know what we should do now that we’ve both fallen for each other.”

you finished your sentence with another wink, essentially rendering jill speechless.

and so, this became a trend.

you would flirt with jill, and the dutch girl would essentially just freeze up and stare at you in shock.

you thought it was cute.

jill thought it was mortifying.

she complained to viv later on.

“i can’t even flirt back what is happening to me?”

viv just gave her a reassuring pat on the back.

“that’s what we call gay panic my friend.”

jill groaned and buried her face further into her hands.

“what’s a pretty lady like you doing all by yourself?”

you ask, plopping down in the empty bus seat beside her.

jill blushes and looks down at the seat in front of her.

she could barely see your playful grin out of the corner of her eye and it was enough to kick the butterflies in her stomach to a higher gear.

you had a little deja vu during the bus ride, except that in the previous predicament the roles were switched.

jill somehow managed to hold it together for the remainder of the bus ride.

it was on the pitch when jill really couldn’t take it anymore.

you didn’t even do anything, except fulfill your captain duties.

you were standing on the sideline, watching a scrimmage between lia’s team and kim’s team.

joe had asked you to sit out and assess every player’s strengths and basically coach them.

and coach them you did.

“caitlin! daan’s open on your left! and malin! cover daan better so she’s not wide open!”

you looked down to scribble notes in your note pad, and when you looked up you saw jill staring at you on the field.

“jill! focus!”

her gaze snapped back onto the game.

before the second round, you gave a bunch of pointers to both teams.

“okay so you guys are doing pretty well, just make sure to keep up your back line, don’t make it sloppy.”

and to the other:

“alright so pass accuracy is something you need to work on, because half of your passes are being intercepted at the moment which probably isn’t something you want.”

after a few minutes the teams took their places back onto the pitch and you began scribbling down a few more notes.

a pair of cleats makes their way before you, and you look up.

“what’s wr-“

jill leans down and kisses you.

you drop your notepad in surprise.

she pulls back quickly and searches your face for any sign of disgust or repulsion, and finding none, she leans in again.

this time, you met her halfway.

it was electric and a little needy, really everything you wanted a first kiss to be.

you briefly heard the cheers and clapping of your teammates, too caught up in the moment to care about anything else.

jill’s hands fell to your waist and yours rested on her cheeks.

you pulled back after what seemed like an eternity, but in reality was only a couple of seconds.

“so i guess i don’t have to fall for you to hold me like that again,” you whisper.

jill giggles.

“definitely not.”

you’re silent for a few seconds, but jill beats you and breaks it first.

“you know, i thought you liked katie.”

your eyes widen in surprise, and your face quickly contorts into disgust.

“oh god no way.”

“oh that’s good.”

you ask her a little teasingly:

“why, were you jealous?”

jill scoffs a little.

“shut up.”

you arch your brow a little in challenge.

“make me then.”

jill’s eyes flash back onto your face dangerously but before she can do anything you give her a little shove back.

“now go back to your scrimmage, we’ve had them wait long enough.”

she rolls her eyes and turns back towards the pitch, and towards a hoard of your giddy teammates.

“flirtation sugar daddy for the wi-ow!”

your perfectly struck ball hits katie square in the chest and your glare cuts eliminates any objections.

still you hear her mutter:

“still if anyone needs any help with flirting i’ll be free to-“

“katie!”

“sorry sorry i’ll stop.”

#jill roord #jill roord x reader #jill roord imagine #arsenal wfc x reader #arsenal wfc imagine #nedwnt x reader #nedwnt imagine #uswnt imagine #uswnt x reader #woso imagines #woso imagine

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kaitycole · 5 years ago

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chapter 3: what are friends for?

Summary: Two little friends have always desired one thing: to end up as siblings. So when the chance presented itself after a finalized divorce, who were they to decline such an opportunity to finally bring their parents together?

Pairings: Bokuto Kōtarō x f!Reader

Word Count: 3344

Warnings: Angst. Fluff. Mentions of divorce, cheating, cussing

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters portrayed in this series. Part of the @babythotshq Dearest Daddy Collab

Tags: open (send me an ask to be added!)

April 2025

Bokuto is bouncing around as he waits in the lobby at the airport. For the twentieth time in three minutes, he pulls out his phone to check the time. Of course, he had gotten to the airport earlier than he needed to, but these last two months were the longest in his life. No amount of phone calls, video chats, or text messages could compare to having Seiko there with him. It was like his life felt empty without her, an emptiness that he hadn’t felt since the day he found out he was going to be a dad.

* * July 2019

She jumped on Bo’s back, laughter ringing in his ears as she wrapped her arms around his neck. He carried her back to his apartment after spending the afternoon down at Osaka Bay; visiting the Osaka Aquarium Kaiyukan and ending the day at the Tempozan Ferris Wheel. The day was spent with fingers interlocked, heads resting on other’s shoulders and enough laughter to brighten anyone’s day. Jess made them take pictures at every booth, saying they both needed copies to remember the day; they were stuffed in the back pocket of her jeans.

Moving to Japan was the first big decision Jess had ever made without backing out. Her parents tried to dissuade her from moving so far, telling her that just changing cities would suffice; she knew it wouldn’t. Mark seemed to find his way to wherever she was, but she knew she was safe at her current distance. Plus she had Bo now and she couldn’t imagine not having him in her life.

He tapped the sides of her thighs telling her to jump off his back so he could grab his keys. She hopped off, leaning against the wall by his door. It was still a shock to her that the two of you had become so close in just nine months. It had taken her longer than that to get close to Mark, but then again there were totally different reasons with that.

Jess followed him into his one-bedroom apartment, slipping off her shoes before sitting on the couch. He excused himself to his room to quickly change; he opted to wear jeans while went out but he hates jeans. He threw on some sweatpants and a MSBY t-shirt. He smiled when he saw Jess, slightly curled up on the couch with the blanket she bought him draped across her.

Bo loved how comfortable Jess was at his place and he at hers. She looked like a natural being by his side and maybe if things had been different, if he had somehow gotten closure with you, maybe he could’ve tried with Jess. Given her a fighting chance if anything more than platonic ever arose between them. Bokuto’s own hesitation came from not waiting to even try to compete with Mark and he could almost guarantee that Jess felt the same about you.

The thought left him with a sinking feeling in his stomach, how many great individuals would end up right in front of him for him to turn away because of you? You, the love of his life. The married love of his life. Sometimes it hurt to see those around him in great relationships, having families of their own while he still held on to imaginary hope that you might be his one day.

He talked to Akaashi about it, who asked him if being just your friend was worse than potentially losing you and of course Bo frantically told him he’d stay friends forever if it meant having you in his life. He knew the former setter was sincere, after all he had been around for most of Bo’s one-sided relationship and had even been the one to encourage him to at least try back in high school.

“Wh—no!” Jess let out a sound that mixed together a gasp and a sob. He watched her pull her knees up under her chin and her body start to shake. Bo practically ran over to her, banging his knee against the coffee table in the process.

“Jess! Jess!” He sat next to her wanting to pull her into him, but something about the way she looked told him not to. He watched her chest begin to rise and fall rapidly as she choked out sobs while trying to catch her breath.

Bokuto kneeled down in front of her, placing his hands on her shoulders to try to stop her trembling. He felt helpless, what could he do? How could he help? Something was hurting her, someone he cared about more than himself and he was at a loss. What felt like forever passed and Jess finally looked up to him.

“Mar…married!” She let out another sob, turning her phone so Bo could see it; it was a picture of a tall blonde man in a suite with a woman who looked very similar to Jess next to him in a white dress.

He knew the feeling that Jess felt right now; that soul crushing agony. The massive weight being dropped on you, making you feel even more inadequate than you had been. At least you married someone who looked opposite of Bo, Mark practically married Jess’s twin. He remembered feeling empty when he got your wedding invitation; crashing at Akaashi’s because his empty apartment felt like it would swallow him whole if he was there alone.

“I’m so so sorry, Jess.” He climbed up on the couch beside her, pulled her into arms and after a few moments of resisting, she let herself relax in his arms. His thumb rubbed circles on her back and he gently rocked her back and forth. He wasn’t even sure this was helping, but he didn’t know what else to do.

A few minutes passed in silence before she looked up at him, her green eyes lined with tears and her face red and blotchy. Her expression was completely broken, like a porcelain doll that had been dropped and cracked from the impact. Bokuto used to think the day he watched you get married had truly broken his heart, the day that he knew he’d never have a chance to confess his feelings, but in this moment seeing someone as lovely and pure as Jess this way; today was the day his heart actually broke.

“He wasn’t ready for a relationship but he was ready to get married. Heh.” Jess let out a humorless laugh as she wiped the tears off her cheeks.

“You’re too good for him, Jess.” Bo placed his hands on her cheeks, looking into her eyes. “I mean it, that woman couldn’t hold a candle to you in any way.”

Jess felt her cheeks heating up underneath Bo’s touch and she offered him a small smile. Part of her wondered if he had felt this destroyed and fragile when you got engaged, got married and he had to watch. How selfish could people be? Jess wanted to believe that you were ignorant to Bo’s feelings, but she found that hard to believe with how straightforward he could be. Her eyesight was still blurry from her tears and her head was throbbing, but she wasn’t completely unaware of what her next move was.

In a blur, Jess’s lips crashed into Bo’s unsuspected lips. He was stunned at first, it wasn’t like he’d never kissed anyone before but certainly not Jess. When she pulled away, Bo thought his heart had stopped, she was looking at him, biting her bottom lip.

“Jess, you’re upset.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I don’t want…I’d hate for you to do something you’d regret or that would hurt you.”

“Bo.” She looked at him, her eyes pleading with him; begging him for a closeness only he could give her in this moment. Fresh tears filled her eyes, “Please.”

It took three heartbeats for him to react to her words. He grabbed her wrist, pulling her onto his lap, his lips pressing into hers. Her arms wrapped around his neck as his tongue slipped between her lips causing her to deepen the kiss.

The smell of sandalwood washed over her as peonies and vanilla filled Bo’s senses. He pulled away just long enough to place his lips on her jaw before kissing along her jawline, traveling down her neck. She stopped breathing, shuddering against his chest as a knot tightened in her lower stomach. She unwrapped her arms from his neck, intertwining her fingers in his hair and pulling it slightly.

He let out a hiss between his teeth, his breath danced across her shoulder. She trailed a hand down his chest, her fingers slipped under the bottom of his t-shirt. His skin heated up as her fingers ran across his firm abs, he pulled back from her. His eyes met hers and after she nodded, Bokuto swiftly stood up with her legs wrapped around him before carrying her down the hall; he kicked the bedroom door shut with his heel.

* * October 2019

Jess found herself having trouble lifting her hand to knock on the door. It’d been a year since she met Bokuto and he had become her best friend; maybe that’s why this was so hard. There’s an uneasy feeling in her stomach, a lump in her throat as she let out another deep breath. She could do this, she was an adult and adults face their problems head on. Suddenly though, Jess doesn’t want to be an adult and part of her wants to go back to being five years old when her biggest problem was which crayon to use.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Before the door opened, Jess chickened out and started walking back towards the staircase. She couldn’t do this, she’d come back and tell him another day.

“Jess?”

She squeezed her eyes shut breathing harshly out of her nose. When she turned around, she saw a confused Bo; her heart sank. How could she do this? She couldn’t and of course the one time she hoped he wouldn’t be home, he was.

She heard him call out for her again before she turned around. She walked slowly over to him then headed into his apartment. He immediately picked up on her demeanor, offering her various snacks and drinks; trying to make her comfortable.

She mumbled something causing Bo to kneel in front of her, asking her to repeat herself. Her green eyes met his golden ones and she knew this was it. That once she said it out loud, once he learned of her secret, everything would permanently change.

“I’m pregnant.” She bit her bottom lip, a wave of nausea hitting her and it wasn’t from the baby.

Bokuto, over time, had become slightly predictable to Jess. He was loud and tended to invade one’s personal space without warning and that’s the Bo Jess knew well. But this Bo, the one who was silent, who had scooted back from her and had a blank expression on his face was new to Jess.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?” The huge smile that appeared on his face threw her for a loop. “This is the greatest news anyone’s ever told me.”

“You aren’t mad?”

“Mad? Why would I be mad?” He jumped to his feet, fingers running through his hair, with the same huge smile plastered on his face. “I’m gonna be a dad!”

Jess felt herself laugh, the anxiety, fear, dread all disappeared and left her wondering why she was even worried to begin with. This was Bo after all and if she could do this with anyone it would be Bo.

“You’re gonna be a dad, Bo.”

“And you, a mom.”

She gasped as Bo scooped her off the couch, spinning her around. He quickly sat her feet to the ground before she saw him drop to one knee. “Jess, marry me.”

“I’m sorry, what?” She grabbed his hands. “Stand up.”

“I mean it Jess. Marry me.” He shook his head, “I know this isn’t proper, but I love you and want to do what’s right for you and the baby.”

She smiled at her favorite person, squatting down to be eye level with him. “Bo, I love you and love that you’d offer, but we don’t love each other in that way.”

“But we could try.” A pout covered his face, hair slightly deflated.

She shook her head, “You know it doesn’t work that way. I don’t love you in the way I love Mark and you don’t love me like you love Y/N. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

He pulled her into his chest, “I just don’t want to mess anything up, I don’t want to lose you either.”

“Lose me? Sir you are stuck with me forever now.” She felt him laugh against her shoulder. “We’ll figure things out as we go, I promise.”

“I’m gonna be a dad.” Tears fell down his face, a new type of happiness washed over him. “I have to call Akaashi.”

* * April 2025

The loud sound of the airport intercom brings Bokuto back to the present, looking up and his eyes land on Jess. He smiles when his eyes land on the little brunette who is proudly pulling her suitcase behind her. Bo squats down when the pair of them get closer to him, his face twists into confusion when Seiko stops walking.

She passes her suitcase handle to Jess before throwing her arms opening, “HEY! HEY! HEY!”

Bo’s face lights up as she rushes into his arms; he wraps his arms around her, picking her up, and spinning her around. He kisses her forehead, squeezing her tightly until she burst into a fit of giggles, trying to make up for the last two months. Jess smiles at the display, watching the two of them together was Jess’s favorite sight.

“Was that your idea?” Bo says to Jess, readjusting Seiko to rest on his left hip as his right-hand grabs Jess’ suitcase.

Jess just smirks as they walk out of the airport. Seiko’s arms wrapped tightly around his neck, unwilling to let go of her dad. Seiko loves her mom, she enjoyed spending time with her and her grandparents in California, but Seiko is a daddy’s girl.

** Seiko has all of her gifts on the coffee table, Bo looks at Jess who just holds her hands up in defense. Seiko is extremely hard to say no to, at least for Jess, Bo on the other hand claims to have invented the pouty look so he’s immune to Seiko’s antics.

“These are for Haruki! I got him a book about California, this tie-dye shirt and these gross jelly beans!”

“Gross jelly beans?” Bo looks directly at Jess who is laughing.

“They are odd flavored; booger, dog food, and others.”

“Anyways!” Seiko shouts, “I got Uncle ‘Kaashi this fancy pen and Misaki a matching tie-dye shirt to mine!”

“I’m sure they will love them!” Bo says excitedly, he leans back in his chair, welcoming the noise that fills his apartment; he’s missed it.

Seiko grabs a wrapped box she’s been hiding, handing it to Bo. “This is for you Daddy.”

Bo eagerly takes the box and unwraps it, Seiko is bouncing up and down as he starts to open it.

“Do you like your shirt, Daddy?” She beams at him, her eyes wide like a kid on Christmas morning.

Bo raises an eyebrow and Seiko immediately slaps her hand over her mouth. He smiles at her before removing the tissue paper and pulling out the shirt Seiko just told him about. He holds up a light blue shirt that has an owl with the words ‘papa owl’ underneath it.

“I love it!” He watches Seiko hold up her finger before running to her room.

“She’s really excited about this.” Jess says to him, sipping her tea.

Seiko comes rushing back into the living room, having changed her shirt to a matching one to Bo’s with the words ‘baby Owl’ on hers. “They match Daddy!”

“They sure do!”

“And this is yours too!” She hands him a small gift bag, but this time she acts shy about it. Bo pulls her into his lap and opens it. It’s a keychain with a picture of her on it, she holds up one of that has a picture of Jess on one side and him on the other. “For when you have a game away from home. So you don’t forget me.”

He wraps her into a hug, “I couldn’t forget about you even if I tried.”

* * October 2025

“Coming! Coming!” Bo shouts at the frantic knocking on his door, he looks at the clock on the wall: 10:15PM.

“I know it’s late. I should’ve called.” You start talking a mile a minute as soon as the door opens, your son leaning against your leg half asleep. “Can you watch Ruki?”

He blinks a few times, trying to wake up himself. “Yeah, sure, come in.”

You and Haruki enter into his apartment; Seiko comes around the corner, the noise having woke her up; tightly clinging to her favorite blanket. Seiko drags her feet towards Haruki, she takes his hand and they both walk over the couch. He rests his head on the arm of the couch as Seiko drapes her blanket over him.

“What’s going on?” Bo asks, still looking at you in confusion, reaching out to put a comforting hand on your arm.

You look around before stepping closer to Bo, leaning in to whisper in his ear. “Youta came home late, drunk, and yelling. I’d just rather Haruki not be around for that.”

Bo’s jaw clenches, in all honesty he’s never thought Youta was good enough for you. Not because he has feelings for you, but if you had to be with someone else he’d at least want it to be someone who deserved you.

“Of course, he can stay here. Maybe you should stay too.” He shrugs, “at least until tomorrow.”

You shake your head, biting your bottom lip. “I think it’s best if I handle this now. I’ll let you know when I’m on my way back.”

“He can stay the night. I’m sure Seiko would love it.”

The two of you glance over at the couch, Seiko and Haruki huddled together, barely covered by Seiko’s baby blanket. It had been a gift from Akaashi, a simple blanket with owls on it and even as she gets older, the blanket follows her; Bo has to take it and wash it while she sleeps.

You look at him, nervously looking at the clock. “Are you sure? I’ll come back first thing in the morning so he doesn’t mess up any plans.”

He puts a hand on your shoulder. “Take your time. He’s fine here. I promise.”

“Thank you.” You wrap your arms around him, giving him a hug before placing a quick kiss on his cheek. Smiling up at him, you feel thankful for him, for everything that he’s been doing for you since the locker mix up; he truly is your best friend.

“No worries. That’s what family does, right?”

You nod at him as you quickly rush over, placing a kiss on Haruki’s forehead before leaving. Bo lets out a deep breath, running his fingers through his hair before heading down the hall. He grabs the extra futon from the hall closet, setting it up in Seiko’s room. Going back to the living room, he scoops up Seiko first, tucking her into her bed, but when he heads back into the living room, Haruki is sitting up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.’

“Uncle Bo?”

“Yeah buddy?” He stretches his arms out for Haruki to climb into them so he could carry him. He rests his head on Bo’s shoulder, his voice lagging from the sleep setting back in.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Anything, what’s up?” Haruki climbs onto the futon, Bo pulling the blanket up.

“What’s a divorce?”

Previous/ Masterlist /Next

#bokuto kotaro #bokuto x reader #bbthots collab #dearest daddy series

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victorromeofox-blog · 4 years ago

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VRF Website and Community

VRF Website and Community - Soft Opening Coming Soon!

I've been a little less active here in the last little bit, but have been working behind the scenes to build up the VRF website and planning around community-building. I'm just about ready to start opening the site to semi-public access and start inviting trusted people to the Discord within the next week! There is some information below introducing some of the content and features of the site and Discord server. Please contact me (Ask or email preferred) if you would like access - I recommend reading the rest of this post before you do, but it is not required.

If you’re looking to better understand BDSM and kink, participate in a community of rational, respectful, and conscientious kink practitioners, and contribute to protecting, uplifting, and helping others - while still enjoying some fantasies - you are exactly the type of person who would be a great fit for this space.

If you’re “just here for the porn”, this website and community are not going to be what you’re looking for. They are specifically a pushback against that very mentality, and the rampant toxicity and problematic discourse in the online BDSM/kink space, especially CNC kink, and your needs will be better met elsewhere. Same goes for those who are just out to get nudes, roleplay online, organize hookups, or find a submissive - there are other spaces geared toward that.

In the meantime, I'd like to explain what this all means to me, where VRF is headed next, and what factors I'm taking into consideration as I continue. This is going to be a fairly reflective post - almost like a letter of intent - but I'm putting it out there primarily for transparency and also for those of you who want some insight into my thoughts and process.

VRF - A Quick Recap

When I started VRF in 2015, I didn't really have a goal. I was just looking to curate the kinds of porn I enjoyed the most on Tumblr and occasionally added some captions that came to mind as I did - and accidentally cultivated a sizeable following. As the blog grew and began to have more interactions with others on the network, I realized that I couldn't stay in-persona all the time - not without sending a potentially dangerous message - so I started answering asks and giving advice out of character, as myself. These "real" interactions, as well as the reality checks that kept rolling in, set the tone for what VRF would become - and made me feel much more comfortable with running a blog featuring questionable content.

I stepped away from the blog and went on hiatus in 2016; I saw a sharp rise in hateful, bigoted, and violent voices online and no longer felt comfortable that my posts would remain firmly in the realm of fantasy for the majority of readers. Although the original @violent-rape-fantasies was terminated in 2019, I made a fairly complete backup of the entire blog before it went down. I returned in late 2020 to start again from scratch, try to rebuild my following, and reconnect with the community - that effort was terminated by Tumblr in 2021, leading me to the two blogs I currently have (@VictorRomeoFox-blog / @violent-rape-fantasies-2) and to create a self-hosted website containing the original VRF archives with major quality-of-life improvements to the Tumblr experience.

This process made me consider what my goals are for VRF, how I want to achieve them, and what promises I make to the community as part of that journey.

VRF - Mission and Values

VRF's mission is to be a safe, inclusive, and collaborative space that promotes affirmative consent, healthy relationships, and conscientious kink, where consenting adults can explore their kinks, enjoy fictional fantasies, and uplift one another without overbearing guilt or shame.

Let me quickly break some of this down:

safe: I want people to feel comfortable consuming and interacting with me and my content - not only the kinks and acts depicted in the fantasies, but in the entirety of the space that VRF projects, including knowing that their personhood, privacy, anonymity, and emotional safety are important to me.

inclusive: although I focus primarily on male-on-female scenarios, people from all walks of life are welcome so long as they are good citizens of the community and conscientious kink practitioners. This also means rejecting hate, bigotry, and willful ignorance.

collaborative: VRF is discursive, both in-persona and out-of-character; the content and direction I take is often influenced by the conversations I have with followers, the asks and submissions I receive, and the state of the community as I see it. I want to always be in conversation with the community to understand its needs and goals so that I can better meet them.

affirmative consent: as discussed in a previous post, I highlight affirmative consent because it centers around positive action as opposed to consent, which can be a passive state. I believe this is critical for conscientious kink.

healthy relationships: the relationships we hold shape who we are, who we become, and how we interact with the world around us. I believe that healthy relationships build healthier, happier lives - this concerns all relationships, from friendships to families to romantic or sexual partnerships. I have seen less emphasis in this community on relationships, and interpersonal interactions in general, and think that this is a major oversight.

conscientious kink: kink can be dangerous or harmful when not practiced with care and consideration - not just for physical health, but for mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. It requires reflection, introspection, and communication in order to form intentionality - the understanding behind what you do, how you do it, and why you do it.

reducing guilt: this is one of the concerns I get most often from followers - how to reconcile their guilt for enjoying consensual non-consent, and whether it is morally wrong or an indication that something is wrong with them. I believe that CNC, like most kinks, can be practiced in a conscientious way to reduce and mitigate the potential dangers, but that it requires consistent effort, education, and research.

Aside from these, I identified values which are important for me to maintain in order to meet the mission. Some of them are:

transparency: I try to be as transparent as I can, while maintaining my privacy and anonymity, so that people know that I have nothing to hide. I cannot build a safe space without building trust, and I can’t build trust without being honest and transparent.

leadership by example: if I am positioning myself as a resource and giving advice to others, I must embody the values I put forward and lead by example, not by words; otherwise, what I say is worthless and lacks substance.

data- and research-driven: I want to provide people with a deeper understanding of themselves and their kinks; while anecdotal information can at times be helpful, I want the things I posit to have weight and justification behind them. This means an intersection of data, research, and analysis around all of the factors involved, including moral philosophy, psychology, sociology, and biology.

care and patience: these kinks are difficult and hurtful to some people, and confusing or conflicting to others. I need to be caring, considerate, and patient in order for people to feel comfortable engaging with my content and interacting with me.

contextualized: these kinks and fantasies don’t exist in a vacuum and must be contextualized in order to remain conscientious of the relationship it maintains to the real world. This means that I don’t want fantasies misrepresented as reality or reality misconstrued as fantasy, and the onus is on me to ensure that followers are seeing both sides of the equation.

quality over quantity: I have a limited amount of time that I can dedicate to VRF work, and want to make the best possible use of that time. I want to focus on high-quality content, both in-persona fantasies and out-of-character advice, research, and resources, without worrying about how much or how frequently I’m posting. It also means that I care far less about the number of followers and viewers I have, and much more about whether I am cultivating the kind of followers that match my vision for VRF and its community.

There are other factors and values as well, but these are the biggest ones for me. They drive how I present myself, how I interact with the community, and what kinds of content I put forth.

VRF Website - Content and Features

What does the website allow me to do that I couldn’t on Tumblr?

No censorship, frustrating filters, or threat of termination - I can focus on my content without running into blockers at every turn, or worrying that I’m going to lose all my work without warning.

Better content controls, organization, and layout - I can group posts logically and have different ways for users to access and view them instead of being one monolithic stream of posts.

Tagging and search - I’ve tagged my archive with kinks, features, toys, actions, positions, locations, and more to make it easier to both find content that you want to see and avoid content that you don’t. The VRF site features granular search controls, including tag combinations, so you can engage with the site how you choose.

Random Post/Random Caption - sometimes, you’re in the mood to mix things up. Instead of seeing a temporally-sorted feed of posts, you can go to a random post or caption from the menu bar.

Clear disclaimers and view control - instead of my content being blended into a sea of posts, which creates difficulty in carving out that safe cognitive space for engaging with these kinks or necessitates rapid context-switching, all of my posts will be in one central repository with clear disclaimers where I have control over how things are viewed.

The VRF Archive - the content from the original @violent-rape-fantasies blog have been restored to the VRF website.

There are some downsides, of course - like the lack of network discovery, limited server space and resources, cost, maintenance, and effort. But the benefits greatly outweigh the additional overhead.

VRF Community

What’s the VRF Discord community all about?

This is a new idea I’m playing with - I’m not new to Discord or community management, but combining that with VRF is a new endeavor for me. Since I’m going to be shifting my focus from Tumblr to the VRF website, some of those network and community interactions from Tumblr will move to Discord instead, such as interacting with followers, taking requests, feedback, and suggestions, and delving deeper into kink philosophy, fantasy, and practice.

I’ve set up the Discord in a way that different sections can be partitioned - like general discussion, BDSM/kink discussion, CNC fantasies, member content (submissions), and so on. The different sections are accessible to different levels of membership and verification to maintain that safe, inclusive, and collaborative space. For example, agreeing to the rules and guidelines gives you access to the general discussion section; verifying your age gives you access to BDSM- and kink-related sections; and being an active and trusted member who contributes to the server over time gets you access to the private sections.

This will also be a much easier way to get in contact with me, and keep the majority of my interactions with the community in one place, instead of hunting across Tumblr messenger for both my accounts, Asks, Twitter, Discord DMs, Telegram, Kik, and email.

VRF - Next Steps and Future Work

In the next few weeks, the VRF website and Discord community will soft-open and move toward general opening. This is a new direction for me, but after assessing my priorities and goals, it is the solution best suited for what I want to achieve. I will continue to use Tumblr, but will likely be focusing the majority of my time on the website and Discord.

The mission and values I’ve identified leave quite a bit of room to explore various ways to express these kinks and share knowledge. I’m not hard-set on VRF being a blog with porn and captions, and could see changes or pivots in the future. I would love for this work to be able to generate some modest revenue in the future in order to cover basic operating costs, support survivors of abuse as well as kink education and safety, and commission custom content. As an aside, if you read all of this, please start your request for access with the word “potato” in all caps to let me know you got this far.

I also want to move toward a more ethical and sustainable model of captions and fantasies. My first step toward this is in creating gifs myself and fully crediting the source, which I started doing when I returned from hiatus. Concurrently, I am working with my partner, who is an artist, to develop illustrations and animations to accompany captions instead of commercial pornography - we’re still in the R&D phase for this, but hope to share some early content soon (including a fantasy and sketch that we’re working on to accompany a follower submission). Ideally, we would be able to collaborate with submitters and sex workers to create fully original, credited, and compensated content - but that’s a huge stretch goal for the future.

We are also considering other formats for fantasy and knowledge delivery, including a visual novel format or interactive media (i.e., games) if the art development turns out well and proves sustainable. We’re both fairly busy people in our personal and professional lives, and in situations where we have to maintain a fairly strict separation between kink involvement and our everyday lives, so carving out time for VRF work is challenging at times!

I look forward to seeing folks on the VRF website and Discord community soon!

#vrf #blog #website #community #about

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mxpseudonym · 5 years ago

Text

Shameful

Pairing: Tommy x Rose (OC)

Summary: Tommy betrays Rose’s trust after an encounter with Lizzie.

Length: 2019 words (allegedly)

Warnings: Cursing

A/N: This is the final angsty installment for my Rose lovers 🥰. For context, in this WIP, Tommy and Rose have an open marriage. Also, I’m really just pulling these titles out of nowhere so bare with me.

Rose Taglist: @amysteryspot ; @sighonahurricane

Rose didn't know when she'd sat down, but she was staring at Tommy from her place on the couch. He stood with his fists pressed into his waist, waiting for her response.

"Pregnant. Lizzie is pregnant with your child." She let the words snake around her mind, trying to make sense of them as she stood and went to the window. In need of something to hold on to, she placed her hands firmly on her waist. "When was this?"

"She told me today."

"No. When did you fuck her?"

"What?"

"When," Rose turned with a shout, then closed her eyes for a moment, feeling herself losing the battle to remain even-toned. "When did you fuck Lizzie Stark and put your fucking baby in her? Because I don't remember you ever telling me about any of that!"

Rose's grip tightened, a means of grounding herself. Tommy's brow furrowed, and he ran a hand through his hair, making her scoff. As if he didn't remember.

"Oh, fuck off, Tommy."

"Do you think this is what I fucking wanted? It was one time, and I made a mistake."

Rose paced, shaking her head. A mistake. Like cracking a teacup or coming home late for dinner or, now, getting another woman pregnant. Tommy moved towards Rose, but she held out her hand. In a fleeting moment of desperation, he said what he knew wasn't right, and it stopped Rose in her tracks.

"I gave her the option to go to a nurse, and she said she wants to keep it. What am I supposed to do about that, eh? Fucking hell, Rose, it didn't mean anything. It doesn't mean anything," said Tommy.

"It doesn't mean anything?!" Rose snapped, feeling the heat rise from her feet to the ends of her hair. There was no levelheaded way to deal with a man who could say such a thing, Rose realized. "How can you stand here and tell me that none of this means anything? Not that you've hurt me and my trust in you or Lizzie's entire life now for that matter, or our reputations for fuck's sake! None of it."

Rose's eyes welled with tears. Tommy walked towards her again, wanting more than anything to eliminate the distance between them. He got close enough for her to look up at him.

"That's not what I meant. I wasn't thinking," Tommy said in an attempt to take it all back. But Rose just shook her head.

"How could you do this?" The question came out broken, too broken to be answered.

"I'm so sorry." Tommy's words held no weight at the moment. He raised his hands to her shoulders, only to be kept away with a smack to the chest.

"Don't fucking touch me." Rose went to walk away but had a quick change of mind. The slap she delivered had been unexpected and substantial, leaving an angry red mark. Pointing at him, she spoke firmly.

"And that is for telling the mother of your child to go to some fucking back alley to fix her troubles. Then having the audacity to say she doesn't mean anything? You will never say those things in my house again, Tommy. It's shameful."

Tommy slept in his office that night and left early for work, hoping that some space would help. Unfortunately, Rose felt the same, and by the time he got home, it was silent.

"Mrs. Shelby went to London, Sir," Francis said when bringing him the phone messages.

The silence in the house put him on edge. Every moment Rose was gone, Tommy spent inside his head, living through everything he'd done horribly wrong. It was a few days later that Tommy came home just before dinner. Before he could deny the chefs a night of making dinner for one for the third night in a row, Francis gave him the good news.

"Good evening, Mr. Shelby."

"Evening Francis. Everything right here?"

"Yes, and," Francis paused, causing Tommy to look at her with anticipation. "Mrs. Shelby has returned. She's been in a bad way today, Mr. Shelby. She's in her office."

Tommy knocked on Rose's office door, entering when he heard her tell him to come. She was sitting at her desk and sighed, seeing that it was him, not Francis.

"No wonder it's taken so long." Her hands clasped together under her chin while her husband sat down a tray of tea across from her. Tommy held a cup out to her, glad that, if nothing else, he knew how to make her tea how she liked it. Rose nodded to the space in front of her, still no touching.

"I know that fixes just about fuck all in this situation, but I am sorry. I-I'm sorry I slept with her in the first place." Tommy sat across for her in the chair reserved for clients and business partners and other people she tended to respect. "Maybe this agreement we have isn't working." He suggested, making her eyes roll.

"You're so fucking dense sometimes."

"Look, I know you meant to,"

"Don't tell me what I meant," Rose stopped him, "What we agreed on is fine. I don't care that you slept with her. This isn't about Lizzie. I'm not married to Lizzie; I'm married to you. You broke our promises, and you broke our rules. What happened to us telling each other everything? And always being safe when we fuck around?" She took a deep breath and shook her head.

Tommy looked at her, his wife, the woman who held his heart. She was right; nothing about this was out of his control. The more he tried to put an end to this with what he thought she wanted to hear, the worse he'd make it.

"My actions are my own. There's no good reason or excuse. I fucked up, and I hid it from you." He admitted to her and himself. He swallowed before continuing. "And I know it's more than just a mistake for us."

"How do you think it makes me feel that you so carelessly broke our," Rose paused. Words failed her as tears brimmed in her eyes for the umpteenth time that day. Her throat tightened, breaking and softening her voice until the tears spilled over slowly. "How can you not imagine me thinking you did this because you changed your mind?"

Her eyes closed, and she placed her head in her hands, allowing her fingers to slip into her hair. She could hear him come kneel next to her regardless. Rose had disclosed to him in different ways and made him envision various scenarios to make it clear that she could not and didn't want to have children. She'd said it before he'd proposed, right up until the days leading up to their wedding. She wanted him to be happy, and he'd promised he was. He'd promised.

"Family is important to me. And yes, I have thought about having children with you." For the first time, Tommy entertained the idea instead of just dismissing it. She turned her head to look down at him. "But since I've met you and fallen for you, you have been everything to me. That didn't change when you told me you didn't want children of your own, and I haven't been living with regret in the slightest, love. I don't need children to be happy. You make me happy and complete and satisfied. You are the best person I know, and I wouldn't change fooling you into agreeing to marry me for the world."

She rolled her eyes. Wiping her cheeks, she turned her chair and let Tommy grab her hand, and he kissed it, grateful.

"Why did you lie? Why didn't you tell me?"

"It was when I got back from meeting Jessie Eden, and she brought up Greta. Same day they brought in a whore for Finn at the shop. I wasn't thinking straight, wasn't thinking at all. You were in London, but I wouldn't have taken you to the river that day anyway. Not you."

"You took Lizzie to the river where you used to meet Greta?" Rose's eyebrows furrowed. "Why?"

"Because I didn't know what to do with that feeling. Couldn't drink it away or smoke it away, so I tried fucking a person in my head."

"That wasn't fair to her, you know that?" Rose asked, looking down at the man who could so surely be called a boy where handling emotions properly was concerned. He nodded.

"Fuckin' terrible thing to do. When you came home, you were angry about Finn, and I knew what this would do to you. Felt easier to let it fall to the wayside and deal with it later, never thought this would happen. I was so used to Lizzie, and so out of my head, I didn't even think about stopping." Tommy thought back to the foggy memory of that day.

"We have to figure out what we'll do now that you're going to be a father," Rose reminded him. Her heart was still aching from the situation that wasn't going away anytime soon. "And for Lizzie, she should have the best." Tommy looked down at her hand, stroking her knuckles and taking in the sight of her wedding ring.

"I should be lucky you haven't thrown the bloody thing in the Thames."

"The drive was just too long." Rose shrugged softly. His eyes lifted to hers, and they both let out a laugh until he took in a deep breath.

"I'm serious, Rose. I asked you to trust me when I asked you to marry me. I told you, I promised you, I'd be honest. And you have with me. And I haven't," he paused, shaking his head.

"Tommy, we'll just have to get through this."

Rose waited until she could wrap this reality around her head before she visited Watery Lane. She didn't have to be Polly to know that Lizzie would be showing already, but she needed to do something.

Lizzie stepped into the kitchen with Rose, and the door closed behind them. Rose looked her over, her eyes quickly landing on the growing bump. As a woman who mingled with the toughest gangsters, Rose found that she had gained an intimidating presence. It was affirmed when she took a step closer, and Lizzie's hands went to her stomach. Rose looked down and took a breath before getting on with it.

"I thought you were supposed to be in London?"

"Stopping by for some things before I go." Lizzie cleared her throat. "You know, if you think you're going to intimidate me,"

"That's not why I'm here."

"Then, why are you here?"

"Lizzie, I want you to know that I don't get jealous very easily. And, I," Rose cleared her throat as well. "I won't ever be able to give Tommy a child. And we know this. I'm not angry at you in any way for this, and I want to make sure you have anything you need or want. I'm based in London, as you know, so I know it well. Picked out a house for you in a fairly safe neighborhood, not far from Ada at all. You're welcome at my apartment as well if you get lonely. Maria, my cousin, is a gem, so I'll send her round to help out and things."

Rose continued, and Lizzie couldn't believe it. The calm and collected Rose Brynner was standing before her rambling as if she were the one who'd gotten her pregnant. Rose concluded by handing Lizzie a paper with contact information and address, telling her to memorize it then burn it.

"Thank you, Rose."

"It's my pleasure." She nodded then looked at her stomach again. "May I?"

"Go ahead. Usually, women just throw their hands my way. It's still my body ain't it?" They shared a laugh, and Rose stepped closer. Rose gently placed her hands on either side of the rounding stomach.

"I'm sorry he told you what he did about seeing a nurse. But we'll take care of you both, I promise."

#Rose x Tommy #Tommy Shelby #Tommy Shelby x OC #Tommy Shelby x OFC #Tommy Shelby angst #peaky blinders imagine

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nikkithomas · 4 years ago

Text

Here’s the deal. I started having a lot of pain in my lower back, legs and hips. At first, I went to the chiropractor and he did some adjustments. I seriously felt so much better.

My regular doctor had prescribed some medicine for me for an unrelated thing and it made me so sick. I’d be so nauseous that I’d have to go get fresh air...walk it off...or even splash water on my face. That had been going on even when I was in Knoxville.

Aircheck had asked me to talk about my ACM trip to Vegas when we won in 2019. I’m sure there were people who thought it was funny or maybe even crass...but they asked what I thought or what was going through my head at that ceremony...and I think my answer was something to the effect of “I was trying not to throw up” or something like that. My stomach was on fire and I felt so dizzy. My face was all flushed and hot. I thought about going to the ER there in Vegas...but I was afraid I’d miss the reason I was there...to pick up the ACM for our station. I think it was win number seven for the station...as a PD it was my third...and it was still a pretty big deal. Honest to God, I didn’t want to let anyone down. I also wasn’t sure if it was food poisoning or something. When I got back to Knoxville, went to my doctor...they ran tests...gave me some medicine...and I thought that was the end of it. They still couldn’t figure out what was going on with me, though.

I left Knoxville and moved to the Tri Cities. Best decision I’ve made in years, by the way. I truly love these people. They’ve done a phenomenal job of protecting their product and their people and I believe that’s why this station is still so healthy when many other legendary stations have suffered. The stress level dropped substantially. It’s amazing what can be accomplished when the station and the people are a priority. Which by the way...XBQ has been so much like KAT Country. It’s been everything I love about radio and thought I’d never experience again. These people couldn’t be farther apart...yet be so much alike. It’s a good thing.

The main thing bothering me then...was my back and legs. Kept having some really nasty pain. The pain was so intense sometimes that it made me nauseous. My face was flushed...I had a fever...then I didn’t have one. Maybe it was my weight? I was getting up to pee a lot at night. Only sleeping one or two hours in a stretch. It was all these things that I never put together.

I wanted to get healthy. Told my doctor I wasn’t going to take that medicine that made me feel so bad...just in case that was the problem. My endocrinologist was cool with that. I started the keto diet. Actually...I did keto up until right before Thanksgiving.

I was so happy. My thyroid is absolutely hateful...so losing weight is the hardest thing to do it seems. On keto...I dropped over 30 pounds. Wow! I thought that was great!! Everything felt better. My energy levels were up. I’d get up at 4am and wouldn’t stop until 11pm...and everything was good...until my hip, back and legs started hurting again. It was so bad one morning that the guys I work with called chiropractors for me. It was awful.

The pain had never really stopped...but at a certain point you just get used to the pain and move on as best you can. That’s what I did up until a few weeks ago. If you know me, you know that I love Toys For Tots, St Jude, Second Harvest, etc. We were out with the marines working on Toys For Tots and I ended up having to miss one day because I hurt so bad. Now for me...that’s bad.

It never let up. I’ve just pushed through and tried to “suck it up” since then. That was a couple of weeks before Christmas. Y’all I seriously thought it might be psychosomatic. Maybe it was all in my head. If it hurt...I’d try to stretch or move and work it out of my body...but that NEVER worked.

So...I go back to the chiropractor. Those guys were so good to me. They can electrocute me anytime they want. (All hail the TENS unit!!) That seemed to be working...and then we had a little bit of a COVID scare at work...(everyone is okay, thank goodness). Around that time...I was running a fever off and on. Low grade. There were some other things that weren’t feeling quite right...so...just to be safe...I got another COVID test and quarantined. Still...I felt like I was ALWAYS in pain. Sometimes it was so bad...I couldn’t move or do anything in any way to make it stop. It made me want to cry. It was embarrassing. It was frustrating because I couldn’t get it to let up. It got so bad that last Saturday I drove myself to the ER to get checked out.

Urgent Care said they couldn’t help because I needed “imaging”. Well...I got that imaging done folks. Turns out...I have a scary mass on my right ovary. It’s pretty huge.

I went in Saturday night...terrified of being around sick people...but it had to be done. The pain was so intense...that my blood pressure shot sky high...and my nose starting bleeding. The doctor ordered morphine, Norco and a CT scan.

The guy doing the scan was a travel nurse. He went from being pretty chatty to sort of quiet and reserved after the test. When they injected the dye into me...he was telling me it would hurt...and it was nothing compared to what I was feeling.

I woke up two hours after the scan to the doctor on call sitting next to my bed and looking sorta weird at me. She told me they’d received my test results and everything I’d said was right on the money.

The burning, pressure, aching, tension...all of it...was related to what she referred to as “not the biggest mass” she’d ever seen...but “one of the largest”. She was surprised I’d been walking around with this thing in me for God knows how long.

Now here’s where the story goes off the rails.

That doctor at Ballad mentioned the word “cancer” about nine times in that room. That was the “suspected” diagnosis. She said I needed to follow up and see another doctor because of what could be “cancer”...and told me they’d have to see if it had spread anywhere.

Now...that was a LOT to take in. So...I did what any other person with an iPhone, an unlimited data plan and tons of morphine in their system would do...I looked that crap up on “Dr Internet”.

The next time a nurse came in...I asked her...”Umm did you guys do a CA 125 test?”

That same poor sweet nurse, who would go on to blow a vein...and push the medicine through the IV into my skin, thereby causing a monster of a bruise and making my vein get rock hard...she said in this really hushed tone...”I don’t know...I’ll ask. I saw your report. I’m so sorry.”

At this point...I’m facing my mortality. I just wanted out of there. I wanted this damn thing out of me...I wanted answers...I wanted everything to be okay.

I still want everything to be okay.

By the way...she never came back in with the answer to that CA 125 test question. So I took that as a hard “no”...or “they did it and don’t want to tell me”.

Monday I was back in the ER. Doubled over, in tears.

The doctor ordered pain medicine...that never came in the four hours I was there. That was NOT a fun time. The nurses just let me sit there. To her credit...the doctor was pretty furious when she found out they’d ignored her orders. Once again...this other doctor looks at me and says...”You know they think this is cancer?”

No. Still no test...but she made an appointment for me with a local oncologist.

Now...that CA 125 antigen test is not infallible, nor is it the end-all-be-all test for ovarian cancer. It is a marker though specifically for ovarian cancer.

So if they’re telling you that you have a massive tumor and it could be cancer...(two doctors over two visits..the word has been dropped about a dozen times...it’s also in the CT report...you’d think someone would bust out a needle...draw the blood...see what that looks like...and get you in the right frame of mind in case it is this horrible bastard of a disease!! Right? Wrong.)

The mass at the time was 10.3cm x 10.3cm x 7.1cm.

The oncologist couldn’t see me for a week...the gynecologist couldn’t see me until February 1st.

Yeah. No big hurry. I’m just having trouble walking. I’m in tears. I’m peeing...like a teaspoon at a time. I know that’s graphic...but if you don’t pee...you need to get checked. I felt like I was (and still feel, by the way) in the middle of a massive labor pain that wouldn’t ease off. It’s pain that makes you want to throw up sometimes. It’s super intense.

I went home that second time...sat down in my room...and I couldn’t help but tear up. I’ve cried two and a half times over the “state of things” since this started. Those are the “what am I going to do” tears...totally different from the “oh Lord this hurts like hell...dear God make it stop” tears.

Talked to our friend Eric who told me it was a shame I didn’t live in Nashville...because I could probably call Vanderbilt and be seen pretty quickly. Eric...was right. I’m three hours from Vanderbilt...but only an hour or so from Knoxville.

I called UT. (Go Vols!) That football situation isn’t ideal...but that hospital ain’t half bad.

Within less than an hour...the head Oncologist had looked over my CT scan and was working to get me in there ASAP. They’d have taken me that day...but it was too late in the day and I’d never make it down there in time. So...they scheduled me for Wednesday morning.

Before I walked out of the room that morning...they told me they were going to operate and get this out of me by Monday at the very latest. The schedule was full...so they needed to check on a few things before I left the hospital...just in case there was torsion or whatever.

I had a CA 125 test. That looked good from what I understand but my CT scan and sonogram looked sketchy. The mass appeared to be even larger since Saturday?!? (It showed up as being 12.6cm x 13.3cm x 8.3cm) They gave me a COVID test and told me to self isolate until my surgery...which is scheduled for tomorrow.

It was upon learning how much larger this thing had become...that I named it...”Larry King”.

I don’t know why...but that seemed to be the name that fit whatever this thing is inside me. In my mind...it looks like Larry King...holding two shot glasses. One shot glass is filled with Dewar’s...the other is filled with Metamucil. He has a cigarette hanging out of his mouth...but I don’t know if he’s a “smoker” yet.

If it officially comes back as cancer...I’ll let you know. If it doesn’t...I’ll let you know that, too.

I’m not writing this for pity or attention...on the contrary. It’s all a lot for me to take in...and I’m just not sure how to process it all. Writing it out sort of helps.

In the middle of all of this over the past week...Tom Starr passed away. He was such a sweet man. There’s a picture that he took of us at CRS...it’s me...Tom...Lisa McKay and Heather Davis. I think Heather wrote a caption that said something like “it’s so hard to believe half of the people in this picture are gone”.

That was pretty heavy.

I’m still trying to process that actually. I thought the world of Tom, loved Lisa McKay (she got me when so many others didn’t)...and just to the left...there I was. I felt like a jerk for even taking a moment to feel bad for myself. There are so many other people who have it so much worse than I do. And what if there’s nothing to this thing? What if it’s just some sort freak thing? There are so many people who’ve fought so hard and powered through so much and here I am...maybe worried for nothing...getting ready to have surgery...and it feels wrong to worry about myself. Whatever is done is done and I’ll fight whatever I need to fight. If it’s not cancer (oh God please let them all be wrong) then I have a lot of things that I need to do...and other people’s opinions and judgment that don’t have any place in my head or the right to exist in my life’s body of work or otherwise. I’ll just keep praying for them.

I keep telling myself those doctors could be wrong. Until I see a pathology report...this isn’t real.

While I appreciate and am thankful for any prayers you can send up on my behalf...please don’t feel obliged to write anything on this post. Seriously. I just needed to get this all out and behind me.

I HATE “bleeding on the internet”. It’s a serious pet peeve. Not everyone is worthy of knowing everything that’s going on...nor should they be expected to care...but I realize sometimes people need reinforcement and support. I still don’t like sharing MY business on here. It feels weird. I’ll talk about things on the air...that I don’t care to regurgitate on Facebook.

I’ll talk about award shows, TV, things that are funny...pictures...but it’s not my business who you vote for or what you believe in. I’m just glad that you DO. Better to have convictions and purpose than be apathetic. Over the years...it’s been amazing to see how a simple picture I’ve posted or link (without even commenting on it...just a pic or simple URL) how it can make people lose their minds.

You will never solve life’s problems on Facebook or any other social media platform. It controls you. You/we are merely the peanut gallery from which billions of dollars are “mined” every single minute we’re on here.

The smartest thing I ever had laid on me about social media was from an interview with a Silicon Valley person that said “If you’re not creating the product...you ARE the product. Think about that.

Our world is so messed up right now. And no matter what party you’re affiliated with...it just seems very wrong to lump everyone together and vilify them all. Not everyone is evil. Not everyone is right or wrong. Writing people off is so inhumane. You really can disagree with someone and not hate them.

I remember being at a concert in a few years ago and had just learned some pretty tough stuff that was impacting a competitor, and shared that with one of the leaders that I worked with. They’d taken a huge blow...which was awesome strategically...but it happened at the same time the competitors PD had lost his mother. I remember expressing that I felt bad for the guy (specifically about losing his mother)...and without batting an eye...the guy I worked with said he didn’t feel sorry for him at all. “That’s just too bad!” He said other things but I won’t go there because that would reveal who that person is...and the person for whom he was speaking about that day. Now...in my heart I hoped that guy who up until then I’d had so much respect for...did NOT know what happened to this guys mom. It just felt gross talking to him. I never looked at him the same way again. It was all about depth. There was nothing there. Very disappointing. I once cared what this guy thought about me...but that was done. And living through this now underscores that feeling and reminds me on a personal level what really is important. That’s a lot for a workaholic like me to process.

I’m signing off now. It got sort of “ramblesque” there at the end. Sorry about that. As for all the other stuff...I’ll let you know how it all turns out.

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theblossomangels · 5 years ago

Text

arrival of surprise.

summary ⟶ The Blossom Angels had last minute changed of schedules which is surprising their boyfriends by appearing in AOMG and H1GHER Music’s party after a months of not seeing each other.

timeline ⟶ December 2019.

characters : Park Jaebeom (Jay Park), Jung Kiseok (Simon Dominic), Lee Seonghwa (Gray), Kim Hyunjung (Hoody), Kwon Minsik (Sik-K), Lee Hwimin (GroovyRoom), Park Junwon (pH-1)

warning ⟶ none.

“You two look...”

“Gorgeous?” teased Hayeon as she wiggled her eyebrows, her eyes looking towards the rear-view mirror to see Seonghwa chuckling in embarrassment.

“I think that’s too extreme to compliment someone..” remarked Eunjae as she looks at her partner who was sitting beside her.

“I don’t disagree with what Hayeon said - and I agree with what Eunjae said too,”

“What a smart answer,” giggled Hayeon and Eunjae roll her eyes as she turned her gaze towards the window.

2 weeks before today’s event, Eunjae and Hayeon were being invited to Jay’s end of year party at Jeju where all AOMG and H1GHER Music staffs and artists will be coming to celebrate together.

The girls sadly rejected his offer as Eunjae and Hayeon were suppose to attend their individual schedules.

But both of them manage to squeeze in their schedule and they could attend Jay’s party since the party will start at 8 at night.

Hayeon decided to make this as a surprise so she called Seonghwa, informing him about her own exciting plan with her dragging Eunjae along.

Eunjae couldn’t even tell Minsik about her arrival. Poor Minsik was sad that his girlfriend couldn’t make it for the party causing him to sulk on Eunjae.

“But seriously, the two of you are pretty. Jaebeom and Minsik are lucky guys.” Seonghwa complimented the two girls who were sitting at the back seat.

“It’s been a year. Don’t tell me you are still single.” stated Hayeon as she frowned towards Seonghwa’s back since he was driving.

“Sadly.” answered Seonghwa and Hayeon shakes her head.

“Busy with your new album?” questioned Eunjae and Seonghwa nodded.

“You’re not the only one. Eunjae and I are busy too.” commented Hayeon and Seongwa’s gaze turn towards the rear-view mirror.

“I can tell. I mean, the two of you lose a lot of weight.. when was the last time that we’ve hang out together?” questioned Seonghwa, seeing him turning his head slightly.

“Last year I think..” answered Eunjae, turning toward Hayeon who was nodding her head.

Eunjae can’t help but to agree with Seonghwa.

She and Hayeon really did lose weight, thanks to the cases that both of them had solved that was mostly involved with drugs and a few tough cases involving rape.

The clothes that they are wearing right now are a little loose.

Eunjae was wearing her usual business clothing with her business black coat while Hayeon wears a ribbon top with a cute skirt and heels.

Both of them, mostly Eunjae, would stay in her office just to finish the reports and to investigate more. She had to some time skip meals to get her work done.

“And you look buff too. Kiseok told me you went to the gym alot.” teased Eunjae, smirking towards Seonghwa.

“Yeah.. Who you’re trying to seduce, Gray?” added Hayeon, followed by a giggle from her.

Seonghwa scoffed as he turned behind towards Hayeon since they stop at a red light.

“Yah! I’m doing this for my own good!” Seonghwa whines slightly, causing both of the girls to giggle.

“Anyways, thank you for fetching us from the airport.” thanked Eunjae, smiling towards Seonghwa.

“No problem. I mean, Jaebeom and the others are going to be so happy as soon as the both you appeared. I’m honestly happy too when you called me. I’m excited to see their reactions, especially Jaebeom and Minsik.”

By the time they arrive to their destination, both of the girls’ eyes went wide seeing branded cars being park by the drive-way.

It was obvious which house that the crew would be in as out of all the houses, only one of them had people coming in and out.

“Jay and the others are probably inside.” informed Seonghwa as the girls already got out of the car.

Hayeon quickly clings onto Eunjae as soon as they passed by a few unfamiliar faces, and feeling them staring at the girls but they feel safe thanks to Seonghwa whom was standing close to them.

“I think they are Jaebeom’s friends from L.A. I’m not familiar too.” added Seonghwa and the girls immediately nodded, following the older one closely.

As they were walking up the stairs, Hayeon’s eyes caught one of the crowd, to see the first female artist that had joined AOMG.

“Hyunjung eonnie!” Hayeon called, causing the AOMG female artist, Hyunjung as known as Hoody, to turned towards Hayeon.

The artists had her eyes widen before running towards where Hayeon was, hugging her tightly.

“I knew you would come! Gosh, when Jaebeom told me you weren’t coming, I was so sad and disappointed.” Hyunjung pouted before pulling away, then turning towards Eunjae.

“Eunjae-ah! You look classy! Both of you!” Hyunjung cooed, looking towards the both of the girls up and down before hugging the other girl tightly.

“So this is why you suddenly disappeared.” teased Hyunjung while looking towards Seonghwa who was smiling cheekily.

“Anything to surprise our CEO. Anyways, are they in there?” questioned Seonghwa and Hyungjung nodded while looking towards the house to hear loud deep laughters.

“Yup. Jaebeom is near the pool I think, and Minsik should be at the 2nd floor with his crew.” informed Hyunjung.

“Let’s go in together since Jukyung ditch me.” muttered Hyunjung at the end, before pulling both of the girls while Seonghwa whining at the back.

Eunjae and Hayeon could smell a familiar scent, knowing some of them smokes as the both of them were swatting the scent away.

“Look who has arrived. Our AOMG and H1GHER Music princesses.”

Eunjae and Hayeon looked towards the voice to see Kiseok as known as Simon Dominic, leaning against the wall with a red cup on his hands.

“I think Hoody eonnie should be the princess. She’s the first female artist to join AOMG.” stated Eunjae as she fold her arms.

“She’s not wrong though.” Seonghwa commented at the back, causing Hyunjung to chuckle.

“C’mon! Don’t I get a hug or something?” Kiseok whines and the 2 girls teasingly give the older one a side hug.

“Where’s Jaebeom?” questioned Hayeon, causing Kiseok to turn towards the pool area. The girls followed his gaze and there were visible frowns coming from Eunjae and Hayeon.

“It’s pretty obvious but there’s girls.” commented Eunjae and Kiseok quickly turned towards the 2 girls.

“They are just dancers. I promise you.” assured Kiseok and the 2 of them nodded slowly but deep down, both of them were a little concern.

“Okay. I’ll probably go up and find Minsik.” said Eunjae as she was about to walk away when Seonghwa stops her.

“I’ll accompany you.” offered Seonghwa as Eunjae excused herself before going upstairs with Seonghwa.

“C’mon. Hyunjung and I will introduce to a few new people.” suggested Kiseok before pulling both Hyunjung and Hayeon along towards the pool.

“Okay. He’s in there.” Seonghwa whispered as he was peeking into the lounge area.

“Have fun!” he whispered while giggling away. Eunjae watched him walking downstairs, leaving the nervous Eunjae alone.

Eunjae gulped as she could hear the deep voices. She didn’t know how to make her entrance, knowing the whole crew was there.

Eunjae and Minsik has been on a long distant relationship and both of them could only depend on their phones to fill their longings of missing each other by texting or calling each other.

She knew that Minsik was suffering with his strange nightmares that has been going on for a couple of months. It was worse back then but thanks to Eunjae who decided to be by Minsik side whenever he has nightmares, his constant nightmares were lessened by him video calling Eunjae.

Though there were some days that Eunjae would be completely exhausted, she didn’t complained to Minsik since he really needs her support.

Till now, Minsik would frequently call Eunjae, him asking her about her well-being and lots of catching up with what Minsik and Eunjae has been doing.

I’ll probably just see him when he go down.

“Eunjae?”

Eunjae was turning her heels, wanting to retreat back when a familiar voice called her causing Eunjae to turned her body to the front in a second.

Minsik stood frozen and she could already see the H1GHER Music crews’ head peeking in.

They had the same look as Minsik but it changes to them waving at her excitedly with cheeky smiles directed towards Minsik.

“Well— Hi!” squeaked Eunjae and she was immediately being pulled towards Minsik as her sight was blocked and she could smell Minsik’s scent knowing she was on his arms.

There were whistling sounds and screams behind the couple and Eunjae could hear Hwimin screaming with joy.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” mumbled Minsik, his hands squishing Eunjae’s cheeks as he locked his eyes with hers.

“Surprise?” Eunjae sheepishly said. Minsik can’t help but to chuckle embarrassingly before hugging her once more.

“I miss you, baby. I-I actually don’t know what to say..” confessed Minsik as he stared at Eunjae. His gaze slowly fell towards what she was wearing, looking at her up and down but he slowly frowns as he observes her.

“Babe, did you lose weight?” questioned Minsik with a frown. He was looking at her in different directions.

“Urm..no..?”

“You did lose weight! You coat looks big!” Hwimin commented at the back, making Eunjae to tilt her head slightly while frowning.

“Eunjae-ah, you really did lose weight.” added Junwon as he walked passed Eunjae since he came from downstairs.

Eunjae could only gulp slightly, seeing Minsik who was silently judging her with crossed arms.

Here goes my night.

“Yo, Jay man. Who’s that?”

“Who’s who?”

“The one with Hoody and Simon. Damn, she is cute!”

Jaebeom frowns as he sees his friend from the states turning his attention towards the opposite from where they were.

“Simon is blocking my view! That should be....”

Jaebeom trails off, his eyes slowly went wide.

Kiseok’s body move away from Jaebeom’s sight to clearly see who is his friend from the state was talking about.

Hayeon was somehow talking to one of the newer staffs from AOMG. His eyes slowly turn towards her body to see what she was wearing.

Why is she wearing a short skirt? But can’t lie though... she really do looks cute..

But Jaebeom’s eyes move towards her face and judging from Hayeon’s body language and her tight smile plus the way she was sticking to Kiseok and Hyunjung, she looks slightly uncomfortable.

Hayeon looks even more uncomfortable as soon as both Kiseok and Hyunjung had to leave the poor girl alone due to their own friends calling them.

“Are you new here?” The newbie staff that Kiseok introduced to Hayeon was Sungwoo. He is the new manager of Kiseok, Seonghwa, Hyunjung and Hyukwoo.

“Well, I guess you could say so.” answered Hayeon awkwardly, seeing the taller one looking at her intensely.

“I’ve never seen you before... But seeing how close you were with Kiseok hyung and Hyunjung noona.. Are you the manager of H1GHER Music’s artists?” Sungwoo asked curiously and Hayeon gulped nervously.

It was obvious that Sungwoo was a newcomer seeing how curious and friendly he was towards her. Newbies in both Jaebeom’s labels didn’t dare to even strike a conversation with her due to the fact of her being ‘one of the two lawyer that saved Jay from the drug scandal’ and Jay Park’s assistant, which the second one isn’t true.

Hayeon wasn’t even working with Jaebeom in terms of his labels. She was just a staff in the Human Resource department.

“Well I—

“Oh! Sungwoo! You’ve met AOMG’s princess!”

Hayeon felt an arm on her shoulders causing her to shriek slightly. She didn’t need to see who it was just by the familiar cologne scent.

She turned slightly to the side to see Jaebeom smiling widely, looking towards Sungwoo then to Hayeon with a slight smirk on his face.

“P-princess?” Sungwoo repeated as his eyes traveled towards Hayeon who was staring at Jaebeom as the older one slightly pull Hayeon towards him, making Hayeon to automatically had her arms on his waist.

“This is Hayeon. She is my girlfriend.” Jaebeom announced and Hayeon’s eyes went wide while her turned towards him in a flash.

“Jay!” Hayeon whispered and Jaebeom innocently looks at her.

“What? Everyone knows about us.”

“Not everyone!” Hayeon slightly exclaimed as she turned towards Sungwoo who looked embarrassed.

“I’m sorry for his.. urm.. honesty, Sungwoo. But it’s nice to meet you.” said Hayeon with a smile while taking out her hand towards Sungwoo for a handshake.

“I can call you noona right?” questioned Sungwoo timidly.

“May I know what year you were born?”

“1997.”

“Okay, then you can call me noona then.” answered Hayeon with a smile as Sungwoo gladly shakes her hand with a smile.

Jaebeom had a visible frown as he looked towards Hayeon and Sungwoo.

“Okay... Sungwoo-ah, help me look after Kiseok hyung. He shouldn’t be drinking too much since he has a meeting tomorrow.” instructed Jaebeom while sliding his arms onto Hayeon’s waist.

“Alright. Nice to meet you, Hayeon noona. I’ll see you some day.” said Sungwoo with a shy smile towards Hayeon before waving towards Jaebeom as the younger one flees away.

“You look really uncomfortable when I wasn’t here and look who is making friends now. Maybe I should have stayed by the pool.” Jaebeom commented and Hayeon turned her body towards him, seeing him pouting.

“I was - but you make the situation more comfortable and less awkward.” answered Hayeon with a smile and Jaebeom could feel his cheeks turning red, seeing how beautiful his girlfriend is when she smiles.

“Y-yeah.. But he likes you!” Jaebeom whines and Hayeon immediately frowns.

“What? What do you mean he likes me? Baby, we literally just met.” Hayeon remarked with a slight whine. Jaebeom looks at her in the eye.

“You should have seen the way he looks at you, baby.” added Jaebeom and Hayeon sighs as she slightly glare at him before giving a peck on his lips.

“Even if he likes me - or not, you declared to him that I am yours Jaebeom.” commented Hayeon with a wide smile.

Jaebeom’s eyes went wide before chuckling.

“Since when you are smooth, baby?” teased Jaebeom before pulling her into his arms as he looked at her, their faces are inches away.

“I don’t know if that was called being smooth but I guess staying in L.A. changed me?” guessed Hayeon as she smiled cheekily and Jaebeom can’t help but to kiss her on the lips, seeing how adorable his girlfriend is.

“You better be smooth to me, baby.” warned Jaebeom teasingly and Hayeon roll her eyes.

“And can you kindly tell me what happen to you saying you were busy with work?” quoted Jaebeom and Hayeon widen her eyes as she blinked at him.

“Well...” Hayeon trailed off, knowing she will be having a long conversation with Jaebeom.

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