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#I also need to do my hair up all nice
meownotgood · 2 years
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I'm going to an anime convention this weekend for my work, my outfit came today ^^
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thekittyokat · 5 months
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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luck-of-the-drawings · 6 months
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smth smth about 'the thing that the character did that you thought was rly rly funny in the moment is actually linked to a terrible trauma that lies within said character.' or wahtever.
#jrwi show#jrwi fanart#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#made this within a short span of wahtever bc i gotta go up to the mountains for my stupid gay job tonight n im trying#nnot to frrRREAAAK THE FUCK OUUTTTTTTi dont wanna work but. get that bread we fuckin shall i guess#ONWARDS TO THE FISH TORMENT!! sometimes flowers feel pain when you trim them before their blossoming. atleast i imagine so#i used to draw gillion with loooong hair tied into a big ol braid. and then it was confirmed that he had short hair when he was little.#AT FIRST I WAS SAD. but then i realized the duality of. when they were little. gill had short hair. edyn had long hair.#AND NOW THEYRE OLDER. and gillion has long hair. and edyn has short hair#both mirroring eachother. looking up to eachother. subconsciously or not. they most certainly care. and most certainly miss eachother.#GILLION ALWAYS LOVED HOW LONG HAIR LOOKs. atleast i imagine so. he hasnt cut it since he left the undersea. sure he wanted to go back home#but even at the very start. he knew he was free in some way now. free to grow out his hair. an adventure would await him before he returns.#he knew it would be a while. so he cant let this go. he cant let this sought-after hair-length get cut away from him again#not yet. not yet. i like to think he loved music too. I SAW SOMETHING INTERESTING A BIT AGO#i see alot of ppl commenting on my baby gill comics like;'i wouldFIGHT this teacher i wanna KILL EM i want them DESTROYED#all very good and nice sentiments! i LOVE the energy here! and it would be nice. to have that catharsis#but the story of young tidestrider is not a story of catharsis. it is a story of agony and being so so small and so special and also so dum#and sucking so bad. and just being a kid and doing the things that a little kid does and so many tired tired people reacting badly to it#youre supposed to be the hero that will save us. our world hangs in the balance and you are the one who tips the scales.#YOU are supposed to SAVE US!! you NEED to SAVE US! CAN YOU PLEASE STOP SQUIRMING IN YOUR STUPID CHAIR!!#you'd think that young tidestrider ought to prevail. and be tucked someplace all safe and sound.#elders gone missing and rotting in a jail. their cultists nowhere around. but theres no happy endings. not here not now.#this tale is all sorrows n woes. you may dream that justice n peace win the day. but thats not how this story goes#BIG ideas for this lil baby gillion series. if anything i make ever gets disproven im killing myself in a well as to poison a water supply
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batsplat · 4 months
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Brno 2003: Sete Gibernau sprays champagne at race winner Valentino Rossi, who is holding up his ball and chain that symbolises how he is 'condemned to win'.
From Rossi's autobiography:
In the summer of 2003, HRC sent over new exhaust pipes. I chose not to use it, precisely because I was sick and tired of hearing that I had an edge over everybody else. But, partly because of the stress, partly because I was also in negotiations with Yamaha, Honda and Ducati, I was in far from perfect form. Sometimes I would lose concentration and make mistakes. When I famously missed that turn in Barcelona and ended up in the run-off area, it was a result of the fact that I was napping behind Capirossi. This incident, and others, caused people to say that my bike was so much better that I could afford the luxury of sitting back and simply turning on the juice late in the race, beating everyone in the final lap. Obviously this was not the case. If I have the chance to pull away, I pull away. Always. Because if you hold out for the last lap you're taking a huge risk: you might finish second! Whereas if you can pull away at an earlier point in the race, you can avoid trouble later on. I only ever sit and wait when there is no alternative. That's when, for me, lying in wait is a good tactic and the best way to win. In Germany, for example, I made a mistake on the last lap and Gibernau made me pay for it. But it's not as if I was planning to wait for the end, as a way of humiliating my opponents. I simply made the mistake of not passing him earlier, so that I could then build a gap. It was a tactical error. After losing that race in that way, because of a distraction, I got so angry that on my way home I told myself, "Enough! From now on, I'm taking no prisoners!" So from that moment on I raced with the aim of dominating every lap and I won five of the last six races of the season. The only one where I finished second was the Grand Prix of the Pacific, in Motegi. But as you know, that day I raced after getting virtually no sleep the night before, because that was the night I had decided to leave Honda. As you can imagine, I wasn't totally focused, to say the least.
The race at the Sachsenring in 2003 was a particularly painful loss. Rossi had overtaken Gibernau on the penultimate corner, but had made a mistake into the final corner that let Gibernau get a better run to the line and beat him by a mere 0.06 seconds. He was criticised by the Italian press in the aftermath, as had become increasingly common that year. Despite leading the championship by a healthy margin, this was widely perceived to be a weaker season than his overwhelmingly dominant 2002, not least because he had achieved only three race victories to Gibernau's four. He had already felt disillusioned with Honda from the start of the year, sick of a culture of winning he found as oppressive as it was relentless. Sachsenring was the last race before the summer break, and he went off to Ibiza to clear his head and get a new haircut.
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^The new haircut in question.
Excerpt from the Brno race commentary:
Rossi hasn’t won for four races*. He is desperate to win here this weekend. He turned up at the circuit this Thursday with a bright red haircut that he got on the beach at Ibiza - he was feeling very jovial, very relaxed, and… Well, it’s been suggested in some quarters that it’s a psychological thing he’s trying to pull on the other riders, because he’s coming under mounting pressure from the press and the fans - and Rossi just wanting to show he’s still the party animal he always was and he’s having fun out there on the bike.
*His results during that time were P2 P3 P3 P2.
Fresh from his time off, Rossi got involved in a tight five-way battle with Bayliss, Gibernau, Biaggi (in the first half of the race), and Capirossi. His victory was far from inevitable, and when Rossi managed to get in front for the first time he was unable to make a break for it. After the group of riders fought it out for most of the race, the contest for the win eventually came down to a direct duel between Rossi and Gibernau. With one and a half laps to go, Rossi ran it wide and let Gibernau get back in front once again - and made another mistake that seemed to give Gibernau the decisive advantage. Rossi made the overtake for the win with only a few corners to go.
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^Gibernau congratulating Rossi, at a time when the two were still good friends. According to the commentary, the two of them had partied together over the summer break on Ibiza.
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^From Rossi's autobiography: "This gag was supposed to be ironic, underscoring my situation with Honda. Everybody expected victory from me. So I was a condemned man, condemned to win..." (See here for gifs of the celebration.)
Rossi finished 0.042s ahead of Gibernau, with another close run to the line... so the elaborate celebrations could very easily have not come to pass. He ended up breaking the circuit record on the last lap - and went on to win all but one of the remaining races that season.
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From Mat Oxley's Valentino Rossi: All His Races:
And then his first post-race theatrics in a while: he wore a prison inmate's hat and ball and chain to poke fun at the Italian media. "They said I was in crisis because I'd been beaten at the last four races. Leading the championship and finishing on the podium obviously isn't enough for them, so now I must work on the chain gang!" And beneath the striped cap was a new red hairdo, which restarted the Ducati rumours. In fact, nothing could have been further from the truth. During a secret midnight meeting in the paddock, Vale told Yamaha that he would ride for them in 2004.
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An excerpt from the commentary at the next race in Estoril:
Well Valentino Rossi arrived in Brno three weeks ago with a bright red hairstyle and a lot of criticism from the Italian press saying he wasn't as focused as he had been last year; he'd just lost that race at the Sachsenring in Germany. He's fought back in the best possible way.
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^Rossi's fans at Sepang 2003.
When he sealed the title in Sepang that year, he brought back the convict celebrations, this time equipped with a big novelty lock and key - so that he could free himself of his shackles at last. He left Honda at the end of the year to embark on a new adventure with Yamaha.
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moeblob · 6 months
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Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.
Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.
#my characters#waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit#deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee#and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name#deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c#man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while#he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair#ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so#its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons#but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me#and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not#fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew#and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable#while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts#and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed#so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en#so you know maybe its that idk#and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now#and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it#and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad#that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal#and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it#the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer#anyway story time in the tags again#im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note#its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him#he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times#and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea#and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you
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kuromi-hoemie · 6 months
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thinking about older women
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#hey auntie 👉🏾👈🏾#some of them b dancing on that line and i am looking respectfully (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠) ♡⁠#many such cases... giggling at how often w how many ppl aksjak family friends.. or it be ur own family 💀💕#someone's mom would joke about snatching me up like 😭😶‍🌫️ ma'am first of all .. would#and the touchy prima (⁠〒⁠﹏⁠〒⁠) ♡⁠ yes please put ur hands on me i am so comfortable with physical contact (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠) let me hold ur hand ♡#🚶🏾‍♀️ being hot is nice sometimes#the forbidden fruit... hey tía (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠) 👉🏾👈🏾💕#some of the exchanges I've had were so 😵‍💫😵‍💫 ma'am.. i got a lil crush on u.#← not my actual family. i do not have one. engaging in one from this perspective is a lil different yfm 🚶🏾‍♀️u don't have to get it#or maybe u do idk im zooted rn and feeling rly gay abt aunties and older women in general okay 😩💕#i need to go sweet talk someone's tía i know she's looking beautiful tonight 🚶🏾‍♀️ i see u girl. i love ur hair your nails are beautiful#i love your color coordination you have such good fashion sense (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠) ♡⁠#ur earrings are so pretty i love your necklace i love your bracelets (⁠。⁠ノ⁠ω⁠\⁠。⁠) lemme go help y'all cook or I'll make the drinks whateve#let's talk.. ♡⁠#Lupe... what are you up to these days 😩💕 my favorite. a family friend#i kinda see family friends as family too sorta bc my fam was p small when i did have one so a friend would be a basically auntie#but also not.. technically. so ╮⁠(⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠)⁠╭ idk. they r tías 2 me though and i love them.#they r so nicey 2 me 。⁠:゚⁠(⁠;⁠´⁠∩⁠`⁠;⁠)゚⁠:⁠。 ♡⁠#she wanted me to say her name n talk to her in Spanish a lil bit and she ate it up 😵‍💫 (⁠。⁠ノ⁠ω⁠\⁠。⁠) ♡⁠ she loved the way i say her name#i had such a crush on her omfg. low-key but not but yeah but respectfully..
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sysig · 5 months
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Having fun, more and more! (Patreon)
#Doodles#Unicorn Tails#Dangersoft#Villainsona#Just Desserts#True Villainy AU#Okay fine I'll talk about the really silly fixation I accidentally fell into lol#It's all Jello's ISaT stream's fault they mentioned Wall Day and I got curious!#Actually it was Jello reciting Will's line as the mad cultist in a kids' unicorn game that got me interested lol he just went all out#And it really is a kids' game! Like yeah some of the lore is dark and ominous and weird but it's genuinely just a nice unicorn game#And the character customization is cute and you can buy a spider hat! I want a spider hat#I'm fully onboard at this point lol I intend to buy it for realsies and play as an alicorn and go hunting for the Estranged Rabbit#Dangersoft is great of course <3 Neon green horse love that for her#Some happies <3 I've been quite happy lately :D Big Loves yay <3#If there is an article of clothing I can hide in I will take the opportunity every time lol#Regularly hiding in hoods and collars - it just feels nice!#More Charm more cutes <3 I've had the idea of her cutting her hair for S3 since she was created but I still don't Actually have anything lol#She's just cute and I love her! She's adorable no matter what she looks like#I think I was thinking something along the lines of her long hair being used against her in her True Villain form#Like how it's normally up and ice cream shaped but Kaiein wanted it down and it gave her a different look#But short it can't look like that :) She's always light and fluffy if it's short! I like it <3#Speaking of - her candle wings popping out from her Kaiein wings!#It's weird to see her with her hair down and glasses on in that context haha#I do like the symbolism of dark inky wings being cut through with fire and light :) Still drippy tho lol#And rounding off with a Just Desserts bee <3 I posted that one JD Pet Bee a while ago but I think bees are also wild animals#They're important for sweets production and pollination! Fruit-based sweets need them!#I personally really love bees I think they're the cutest but I also get really stressed about buzzing :'D#Does Not help that my hair is a colour they're attracted to so they come up right next to my head to investigate agh#So Charm is the same! Loves bees! They're wonderful and important and cute! But the buzzing...#She's being very brave tho <3
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vermillioncrown · 9 months
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by this point, my frustration is justified--if i have:
1) already mentioned in multiple replies that a fic is on hiatus
2) bolded its status and my reasons in the end note
3) added the status and a warning that i will delete comments of the type in my summary
why do i still get asked whether or not i'll ever update again? and that's all they have to say?
becoming increasingly concerned there's a subset of bil readers that don't know how to read or pay attention in a hobby that requires reading comprehension and an attention span
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keeps-ache · 5 months
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HEY
#art#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#oc#pink space#i really like the subtract glitch i've been doing recently - so here's some of that again lol :3#the way it interacts with their palettes is so fun i like it a lot ehegh :33#//anyway do you ever consider just tossing out any part the human body you've learned to draw and just drawing dumb little guys with arms#like pipecleaners forever or what hfhs#//oh this is was doobled in traditional originally#i need to digitize more of these. Because#though aura's hair was more extreme in the second panel in that version - i'm tired though and 3 days ago it was the same so no feelings to#change that lol :)#also i didn't shrink the noise enough so it didn't look right - and i was not going to reimport it so Bon Voyage my dude hfhs#was Supposed to fit on a 900x900 canvas but i made the panels a liiiiitle bit too big so it's 950x950#which is Fine it's a round number but it's not a Round-Round number so [gesturing]#1000x1000 was way too big for this little thing so she sits at a pleasant halfway point :>#//anyway i was also up til 3 a.m. last night doing ?? something ?? i genuinely don't even know what lmfhsbvh#nice though maybe my brain'll get a reset lol :3#stay up really late some random nights and jumpstart your brain!! it's foolproof!! never fails!! [<- these statements have not been reviewe#by the FDA or the Center for Sleep Control]#//ANywho now i'm going to be on my way#/oh i also forgot to post the oath n aura refs i made for artfight lol-#i'll prolly put those up w/ the kira and hid ones though :>>#i like to have the whole ensemble :D i Do feel bad when one of them gets left out hghsfh - like forgetting a stuffed animal somewhere#even though they're all together for small portion of the story it still feels off lol#i should prolly introduce the rest of the cast at some point. .... ......... ..........hm yea prolly. maybe one day hfhs#//anyway NOW i'm going i've run out of tag space i think hfhs - toodles !! :>
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nerice · 3 months
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why do you. wear your nemesis's melody as an earring anyway huh.
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sucktacular · 1 year
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Went to Anime North this weekend! Kinda just loosely hung around but here's a vest-less bunch of selfies of my Matt cosplay!!
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piplupod · 3 months
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are you the most annoying person in the world or do you just need to eat something: a memoir by me
#i feel like absolute shit rn fsdjkl#i think i talked too much today even though i barely spoke at all#but every time i talked someone else had smth to say and then the leader guy had to keep coming back to me like ''what were u saying?''#which was rly nice of him but like. if i just kept my mouth shut then he wouldnt have had to do that at all fdjskl#i mean like. he did ask me questions directly a few times. so he was trying to help me have opportunities to speak#but fsjkl i just. i feel bad for talking bc i know everyone else wants to talk constantly#and i can do without speaking fsdjkl i just... i kept stumbling over my words so badly and it was rly embarrassing ;-;#but i'd get nervous and panicked bc i knew i'd be interrupted at any second so i was just trying to find the shortest way to say my thing#but then i'd trip over my words bc i was so nervous and it'd take too long#and i just felt like i wasn't putting enough effort into my tone so i probably sounded rly flat today and i just. urgghhh#holding my head and tugging at my hair. why can't i just be normal dgjkl why am i so fucking annoying and weird and difficult#i dont know 😭 today was rly difficult bc i was just feeling kind of awful and like i was in the way all day#i did find some yarn colours i need at a flea market though and also some dip pens that i've always wanted to try#i figure $3 is a steal of a deal to try out dip pens instead of buying them brand new for like $30 fdsjkl#so there was something good from today! i just feel like i was annoying to be around all day idk fdsjkl#i honestly probably was totally fine sdfjkl i just. argh#and i hate going to stores w the centre bc i end up following the group leader around after a while bc i dont ever buy anything#i look around at the stuff i like to look at and then i am done and don't want to be a nuisance by being hard to find when everyone-#-else is done so i just figure sticking by the group leader is the best idea. stores dont like when i hang around the front for long fdsjkl#but then i just feel like a weird little kid trailing after their parent 😭 i wish i could just be an AdultTM but augh augh augh#what a fucking weird thing for me to do dsfjkl i just. dont know what else to do bc stores get annoyed w me if i wait at the front#and i dont want to wait outside bc then they'll forget im out there and look for me inside when theyre done LMAO#if i had income then maybe i'd be able to spend longer looking at things but fdsjkl theres only so much looking u can do when u dont buy#pippen needs 2nd breakfast
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nervocat · 3 months
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I love my cat sm
#💭 — ⌗nervo rambles . ★#tw vent#putting that there .....#but I went down a negative spiral and whenever I do that gender dysphoria kicks my ass#and Tuxiedo wasn't on my bed so all I could do was hold on to my plush and cry#but I felt him come and jump up on my bed from my window#and I turned around and he pretty much immediately came to lay on my chest#ik that he doesn't know something/someone putting weight on my chest rlly helps me when I get like this#(it helps with me not feeling hyper aware of my chest and is just a general comfort thing for me that rlly only my cat does)#but just having him do that comforted me a whole lot#and since he got off I'm just hugging said plush to my chest to try and help#which it does#but it's also led to me not being able to move even an inch bc I always get hyper aware of my chest#It always happens#I stay frozen when it gets rlly bad and I just just wanna throw up my insides and rip my hair out sometimes and I just hold my plush close#too much? probably#I get kinda violent to myself with my thoughts#very gorey would not recommend#but I'm not gonna say them in detail here#but yeah Tuxiedo getting up and comforting me was rlly nice#I love him :33#and my bad for getting negative on main fellas 🙏🙏#need to shower but who knows if that'll make my current horrendous gender dysphoria worse#(it will bc I have to look at myself in the mirror every time I go to get in the shower and I get sick just looking at myself)#also Over & Over by Rio Romeo rlly had to start playing during this 💀💀#“Over and over I fuck myself over” lyric hitting more than usual 💔💔
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moonlit-orchid · 4 months
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good evening to everyone except a certain few fucking anons
#go fuck yourselves like seriously what the fuck#im so sick of this#this is about the last two anons by the way. i havent gotten any more because i turned off anon asks#if you wanna know why anon asks are off blame those two assholes#seriously that stupid shits been getting to my head#you know why? because every fucking person around here (especially my mum) LOVES to criticise me and accuse me of victimising myself#literally every fucking thing i do is wrong around here down to my hair#all these fucking adults like to bully me about MY hair#fuck you if i want bangs I'll keep the bangs#literally it seems like they're just doing whatever they can to change me into someone else. someone they want#this fucking culture of mine is so shitty i swear to god#like they think that BULLYING you is people being honest with you#and that if someone's nice to you theyre shittalking you behind your back#(honestly considering some of the people i see i wouldn't be surprised)#and im not even doing anything thats WRONG either. im different and not one of these people can tolerate that#yeah my mum sent me a video of a goat with curly hair and implied she thinks my bangs are like that. in a derogatory manner btw#so yeah that's had me pissed and then the fucking anons were also making me pissed#fuck you I'm gonna be as selfish as i want when i post on MY blog#this blog is MINE#I decide what i write and how much i wanna shittalk someone who upset me to get my feelings out. if anyone wants to call me selfish fuck you#and you know what? fuck That Person too. they geniunely messed me up more than they helped me#yes. im still gonna talk about them. im still gonna complain because FUCK YOU I NEED TO GET IT OUT SOMEHOW OKAY#I NEED THIS SHIT OUT OF ME AND IT GETS BACK INTO MY HEAD SO I NEED IT OUTSIDE#and fuck you anons who gave your unwanted opinion. if you cant say anything nice SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTHS#i was taken advantage of and manipulated#and apparently I'm the bad guy for small mistakes like excuse me#and then that person even told a friend of theirs once to attack me (over text) like what#i just cant anymore it needs to be fucking out#and im not sorry for complaining about this because this is my blog and i will complain on here. this blog is for ME. for MY happiness.#and as such i will fucking complain shit and i will fucking post my vents because thats the only way i can send these emotions off for good
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mainfaggot · 5 months
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just watched challengers at the cinema w my little sister. it was so intense wtf
#i was like grabbing onto my scalp just yanking my hair in the last 5 mins and at the end i yelled (quietly) LOVE WINS!#bc there were only 4 other ppl in the cinema lol#its so fucking stupid on the surface like ok complicated polyamory and also insane obsession with a sport bc that is what makes these people#who they are; as in the sport IS their identity as individuals that's what fills the void that lies underneath skin and bone etc.#blah blah basic shit about messy relationships with the self and romantically with others#but it's also so profound because despite the many obstacles and personality differences. they all love one another and the sport so much.#it's so weird it's twisted in a sense because it's like they only have one another and then obviously tennis (bc tennis is the bridge)#it's very.. codependent#i can't believe my little sister understood like not in a condescending way i cant believe she got it but in a “oh i didnt know you watched#stuff with this much emotion and that you cared enough to critique media“ since she doesn't usually tell me about what shes watching#and when she does she tells me about sitcoms ..#so yeah it was nice that we watched it together but also kind of weird bc#well surface level: the make out scenes were just us giggling awkwardly#and on a deeper level when i was watching it. i couldn't help but think about how#patrick at some point turned into an observer; he stopped being a part of the art tashi patrick trio (and tennis!) and turned#into a spectator#despite very much still being a fellow player#and then tashi became a spectator of the sport despite very much being absorbed in it all and in love with art (?)#i dont know what else to call it but her need to control him came from a place of some kind of care ... albeit manipulative and self serving#so Patrick and tashi are almost parallel lines if that makes sense#theyre kicked out of “the club” whatever the club may be (for Patrick he's no longer in the trio) and for Tashi once the trio is long gone#she's no longer a competitor bc of her injury#and then art is just in the middle of it all#and he'd always followed Patrick's lead in the past and then he started thinking for himself until he became so taken by Tashi#and then he just became her little follower#he just wants to be loved and told what to do because he doesn't know how else to live. im projecting? im projecting. anyway!#the ending. god. the ending sums up their whole past dynamic:#patrick is petty. art is irritated. tashi doesn't get their little dynamic. patrick loves art. art is forgiving. tashi loves the sport#(and maybe she loves them both in her own fucked up control freak way)#z.post
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sysig · 3 months
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Why, is he so pretty (Patreon)
Bonus Max ♥
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#Doodles#SCII#Helix#ZEX#Max Vyer#Doodles between studies and playing with hair how could this have happened hehehe ♪#Hghhghgh every time - Every Time!! Every time I see sketches it Makes Me Want To Draw and then I do and it's great and I love it#Inspire!! My favourite ♪#Helps when the subject is as cute as ZEX is hehe <3#First one was before that but I'm still counting it because he's still just as cute lol#Back him into a corner do it (and also give him kisses he deserves it)#He's just so popular! All eyes on him!#The more experienced in the leader role ♫#The rest are all inspired-bys lol - the studies were quite fun as well! They always are#I hadn't really given much consideration to his hair to be honest :0 Other than feeling like I make his hair too long and fluffy lol#But to me fluff = fluff = fluff so seeing the shapes broken down was really neat :D#How it would react to being up or down or different weights and thicknesses and curliness - very cool! Like it a lot :D#I really like his bangs covering his closed eye hehe <3 Weighted or otherwise! Just seems like it'd be convenient for him#That way that hair in your eyes limits your visibility and/or blink a bunch but he just keeps his shut haha#There's also something nice about it being out of his face and you can see his closed eye so clearly as well ♪#Conversation starter hehe#And one that's not a style study but /is/ from after doing a couple haha - nose ear and eyes seem to be the big factors there hmm#It's interesting :3#And fun! :D#And then a bonus Max for funsies because I'm Love Him and he's So cute <3#Cannot draw this man without a pillow he embodies pillows to me he needs a pillow that is His Prop in my head lol#If/when I make that Max plush (it's still on my mind) definitely gonna have to make him a pajama set with pillow and blanket#Needs the cute sleepies! It's required!!!
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