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ditttiiiwrecks · 4 years

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OT7 Fic Rec Master Post:

last updated (16/05/2021)

If my master-list is anything to go by I am clearly obsessed with ot7, so here are some of my favs.

Some of these stories are linked from Ao3. If any of those fics have been cross posted to Tumblr, please let me know.

Current Fic Count: 25

Give all these amazing authors some love ♡ & To all the authors, Thank you so much for writing. I am so beyond grateful for all the work and time that you put in to writing these stunning pieces of literary art.

This list is by no means complete, so if you have any recommendations, send em my way! ♡ Happy Reading!

~Love, @ditttiii ♡

1) Void by @btssavedmylifeblr

Summary: You are the only female crew member on a 12 year space mission with seven handsome men. The sexual tension is real, y’all.

2) Make You Know Love by @btsismybiass

Summary: Growing up, Jungkook had always shared everything with his brothers; toys, food, clothing, friends, and even girls. The seven were inseparable — secrets were not allowed. Halfway through senior year, Jungkook was sent to a school halfway across the world, though he wouldn’t tell anyone (that didn’t already know) why. Years later, he has an adjoining apartment with his best friend (who is hopelessly in love with him) and 6 brothers he has yet to tell her about. One night, she comes barging into his home unannounced only to be met with a group of sexy foreign strangers.

3) Armed to the Fangs by @jingabitch

Summary: You grew up in the Hunter’s Guild, understanding that it is your sacred duty as a hunter to protect humanity from the vampires that lurk in the dark, draining the life from anyone unlucky enough to be caught. While making the rounds one night, you encounter Taehyung, a fabled born vampire - not that you know that when he tries to entice you into a dark alley. Next thing you know, you’re kidnapped and taken to their home, where you realise that all of them somehow crave your blood and seem to know more about your past than you do. Finding out about where you came from might be the key to setting humanity free.

4) Sanctuary by @softykooky

Summary: some people are lucky enough to be born into a family that loves them. others meet their family in a coffee shop while on the run from the korean ambassador, while they’re holding a man at gunpoint and beating him to a pulp for treason against their syndicate.

5) Eunoia by @wishesunderthestars

Summary: You are a world famous director and you have dedicated your life to your job.You have everything you could ever dream of; wealth, recognision, talent, your friends and family. But loneliness ins’t cured by success. So what happens when you somehow rescue seven hybrids? Can they fill the void?

6) Tangled Hearts by @writersrealmbts

Summary: You have seven hybrids and life with them can be both good and stressful. Some days are better than others, but in the end, you know that they’re always there for you, in more ways than one.

7) Diamond Tears and Little Wings by @writersrealmbts

Summary: You’re a fairy, taken in by BTS. You need lots of love and care, otherwise your light will fade and you turn to stone. Between the seven of them, you should never feel unloved. Right?

8) Rose & Thorns by @minniepetals

Summary: a lone rose, a little broken, until Jungkook came along and the two of you saved each other. and in doing so, Jungkook showed you a world where he shared with his six other mates.

9) The Butter Series by @minniepetals

Summary: their names alone had every men and women turning their heads and falling at their feet. successful, prestigious, handsome, rich and untouchable to anyone that looked their way. and you? you were just an employee who worked for them. who would have known you meant so much more to them than you could ever imagine?

10) Stray Cat Strut by Bang to the Tan (TyphloticHaruspex)

Summary: When your grandmother passes away, she leaves her countryside house in your name. The longer you stay, the harder and harder it becomes to explain away the odd happenings. What kind of secrets does this sleepy town hold? And why do the local animals act so strangely around you?…

11) BACK HOME by @alexlwrites

Summary: : The one where, after living abroad for years, you move back to Korea and your old high school friend Namjoon offers you his place to stay while you get settled, casually forgetting to mention that: a) he still had a massive crush on you. b) he lived with six other guys.

12) A Hundred Percent Human by Wrienne

Summary: In which you are forced to take care of seven hybrids in a twist of fate. After your estranged mother passes away, you're left with an unwanted will and the heavy burden of responsibility. Although you're desperate not to stray from the familiar path you thought was laid out in front of you with a fully human boyfriend who loves you more than anything, your life is thrown upside down once more after another unfortunate incident (that may or may not have to do with said boyfriend) occurs. Drunk and down on life, you finally decide to deal with the house and the unsavory business your mother left behind. However, to your shock, you find that seven very different hybrids are included with both the house - and the business. Seven hybrids you never even met before - even less agreed to take care of. Set in the not too distant future where infertility has become mankind's greatest issue. Will contain sexual content.

13) I’ll Still Stay by @sugamoonv

Summary: Y/N, living in a society where hybrids are seen as commonly as pets and working a well-paying job, finally decides to adopt a hybrid for herself. But what happens when instead of one new companion, she leaves with seven? And what happens when nature decides that these companions are meant to be more than that?

14) The Gateway to Your Heart by @justimajin

Summary: ❝You gave me the best of me, so you give you the best of you.❞

15) Like I Do by interlude__dream

Summary: It's summer in Seoul. You didn't expect much to happen during your nights working at a coffee shop, but somehow, giving one kid a sandwich wrapped up your fate with seven hungry boys more tightly than you could have ever imagined.

16) w e a r e a l l m a d h e r e by cath_mg

Summary: In which you're a model student who just managed to catch not just one, not two, but all seven 'transfer students' who just happened to visit your university.At the end of the road, will you stay or will you run? Or...

17) Follow Me Down by ARMY_BRAT

Summary: It was supposed to be a simple vacation to a foreign land. You certainly didn’t expect to wake up drugged and caged like an animal in the basement of seven beautiful men.

18) Sharing is Caring by always_bias_wrecked

Summary: You decide to let the rest of Bangtan watch you and your boyfriend Jimin have sex one time. Now suddenly everyone seems to want a piece of you, and Jimin doesn't seem to mind sharing.

19) Ruin Me, I Dare You. by porcelainbones

Summary: Where a regular wannabe author discovers the members of the biggest band in the world are her soulmates. All Seven. (not a reader insert)

20) Abundance by @angelicyoongie

Summary: You never expected that you would end up adopting a hybrid, and if someone had told you that you would end up with seven? Well, you would have thought they were crazy. But here you are, with three different packs of hybrids that don’t get along – but all want to stay with you. Yeah, it turns out crazy is an understatement.

21) You Never Walk Alone by @agustdakasuga

Summary: You live a quiet life in your late grandfather’s cabin in the woods. You go to school just to graduate and get your diploma, not to make friends or stand out from the crowd. That was until one day, you enter your home to see a pack of wolves that need shelter.

22) Accidental Friends by erakun

Summary: Meet Bangtan, international superstars, the pride of South Korea, the love and hope in the dark of many lives, the role model and celebrity crush of so many people, and a group of people you often stumble across in your day to day life. You become acquaintances, slowly become friends, and- that's it. You are in a platonic friendship with Bangtan. Let me say it again. *clears throat* PLATONIC.

23) Lifeline by @forgottenpasta

Summary: What happens when a witch curses seven vampires to share one fated mate between them?

24) Restitution by @cloudteawrites

Summary: When an estranged uncle leaves you his massive fortune you wonder if the universe is playing a joke on you. when that fortune comes with seven hybrids, you know for sure that it is.

25) The Lore of the Forest by spield

Summary: Nothing ancient and magical is ever really lost. When the descendants and heirs of the myths and legends come together to live a normal life, something - someone - is thrown into their plans. Bringing with them aid, magic and so much more.

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issaxcharlie · 4 years

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You are the music in me

Pairing: Alive! Luke Patterson x Julie Molina

Request: SICK FIC JUKE: “Juke live together (but not dating yet) with Alex and Reggie all in apartment, both Julie and Luke wake up sick as dogs (flu/strep up to you) and force stay home from classes,sick by Alex. While being alone basically all day they finally admitted they like each other more than friends and get together when they start feeling better few days later.”

THANK YOU FOR YOUR REQUEST ANON🤍

This is not how Julie and Luke saw each other spending the weekend. They took care of Alex for a whole week together and just when the drummer began to feel better, his friends fell to the flu. To stop the chain of illness, Julie decided that it was best for Reggie and Alex to stay in Willie's instead of the apartment the four friends share until she and Luke recovered, but two stubborn patients taking care of each other is a somewhat chaotic combination.

"I can't take those pills, they are huge!" The guitarist has his arms crossed, his lips completely closed in a grimace almost impossible to undo.

"Luke, I've seen you eat two meatball sandwiches at the same time, I’m pretty sure one pill is not going to kill you."

He was about to continue fighting when Julie turns to cough. Every minute that passes she looks weaker and probably what she needs the least is to be carrying with his tantrums. So he takes the pills from her and passes them after maybe 15 tries and 3 possible chokes. Julie laughs slightly with each attempt, satisfied that at least he is trying for her.

Once they both finally finish taking all of their meds, Luke uses what little strength he has left to carry her in bridal style to her room. Julie tries to resist but her lack of strenght is way too much.

"Let yourself be taken care of, Molina." He whispers in her ear as he draws her closer to him. When they finally get to the room Luke gently lays her down on the bed and covers her in blankets to the best of his ability.

He feels bad for her. Because yes, he was there during Alex's illness, but the truth is that he didn't do much. The only reason he got sick is because he shares a room with him. On the other hand, Julie was faithfully taking care of her friend, taking his temperature, reminding him at the correct time about his medicines to the point of setting alarms at 4 in the morning just to make sure he got up to take them, made him hot meals and tea, she was the perfect nurse.

And what does she have instead? Him. The one who hates taking pills, doesn’t know how to take the temperature, much less what time the medicines are due, and he definitely doesn't know how to cook much more than a sandwich.

But something the aspiring musician does know how to do and sure as hell will do for her is giving her all the cuddles she might need (and probably want).

Luke walks to the other side of the bed and sits on the empty side, bringing burrito Julie into his arms, her resting her head on his chest.

He takes a few seconds to enjoy the situation. Yes, it is not at all what they expected to do today, on Saturdays they usually write all morning and rehearse all afternoon to go to some small club to play at night. The band was completely their priority on weekends as they had to study and work to support themselves, so the guitarist couldn't remember a Saturday where they stayed like this, doing nothing but enjoying each other.

Luke had become so immersed in that routine that he had simply sunk to the bottom those feelings that usually shine bright as the sun when they write or sing together or in rare moments like this one when he has her all for him, their hearts beating as one.

Realizing that he liked Julie was as easy as discovering his passion for music. When is her, everyday situations like hearing her rave happily about something that happened during the day feels like listening to his favorite song at full volume. And there’s the other side of it, those special moments like performing on a stage together. The sensations he gets are on a league of their own, their chemistry growing and enveloping in this mesmerizing explosion of energy. She’s this beautiful bright star that for some strange miracle, he is blessed to admire closely without burning.

The love and admiration he feels for her is so big that it terrifies him. In his experience, these types of sensations are not free. His passion for music completely cost him the relationship with his parents, not even the effort of continuing in school has made them give his dream of being a musician a chance.

What will it cost him to chase Julie in a romantic way? Their friendship? The band? What if things don't turn out as he would like and they end up fighting and separating the one thing that has cost them so much to build? Sleepless nights, hunger, blood, sweat, raising this dream has not been easy, could he really dare to risk it in this way? Could he be so selfish?

He often forces himself to think he couldn’t, but at that moment, Julie Molina swings her body to the side so she can look at him head on. Her big, beautiful dark eyes fixed on his.

“You aren’t usually quiet for more than 5 minutes, are you alright? Does something hurt? Do you want me to check your temperature?" With some effort, she manages to free the arm that is not resting on the bed and gently touches Luke's forehead, making sure he is okay.

He can't help but grin in response. She’s just so perfect. She shares the same passion as him, she fully understands the magical feeling of being on stage and it provokes on her the same excitement and adrenaline. She is sweet and cares about everyone, even loves his friends as much as he does. She is determined, smart, funny, beautiful. A lot of times he can't even understand how someone so perfect exists. And she not only exists, but is there next to him, wrapped in his arms.

“I- I’m fine, everything is fine, I promise. Focus on resting that angelic voice of yours.” She blushes as if that is not an already well established fact. He can’t help but look adoringly in response. He just loves to make her blush, being able to cause those reactions in her so easily.

You're right, I can't risk being replaced by one of the many groupies that have been after you lately." He can’t help a cocky grin, she blushes even more and decides to sink her head into his chest.

He takes advantage and hugs her even closer to him, bringing his head closer to her face to whisper in her ear.

"I could never replace you." He feels her expression changing in his chest, probably a smile. Her small hand squeezing his back in response.

“Liar.”

“Are you jealous, Molina? Because that’s hot.” She lets out a nervous laugh and Luke pulls her away just enough to be face to face.

“I’m not jealous.” She murmurs trying to sound sure, the image of those girls way too close to Luke at last weekend’s gig clouding her vision.

“Good, because you don’t have a reason to be.”

The singer looks down, she understood the opposite of what the guitarist was trying to say.

“H- Hey, no. I didn’t mean it like that.” With one of his fingers he carefully lifts her chin so he can see her eyes again.

There's a part of Luke that tells him to take a moment to think about what to say. The logical and sinic part. The one who knows that what he is going to do is going to cost him.

But the other party, the one who has been in love with Julie Molina for 2 years, is already tired of waiting and ready to take a leap of faith. And today that his mind is tired and weak, heart conquers logic.

Neither has spoken aloud about their special relationship, but they know something is there. It is a wordless fact between the two. And maybe it's time to add words to the melody.

“I meant you really don’t have to because all I hear, is you. I have tried to find peace in my soul with hundreds and hundreds of melodies, Julie. And it wasn't until I heard your voice that I found the right one.

Why would I even want to think of anyone else when I have so much more than I could have imagined across the hall every day? It’s always you. You, making sure I eat when I’m in my obsessive writer mode. You, stroking my hair when you think I fell asleep. You, spying me with your beautiful eyes between classes to make sure I’m actually on school. You, watching musicals with me till 5 am on Saturdays even thought we had one hell of a difficult day and a tired night just because you love to see my reactions. You, worried about me feeling bad when you are clearly sicker. It’s always you, Julie.”

In a moment of bravery, Julie brushes her lips against Luke's, waiting for him to make the final decision, which he doesn't take two seconds to make by capturing her lips on his, savoring finally being able to know what it feels like to kiss Julie Molina.

That it tasted like honey was not something that surprised him after seeing her eat several tablespoons of honey with lemon before bringing her to rest.

“Luke, remember when we watched High School Musical 2?” She grins, clearly happy with what just happened.

“Yeah, like a month ago.” he seems surprised with the random question but smiles to encourage her.

“Well, I mentally dedicated you ‘you are the music in me.’ Huh, It feels good to get it off my chest.”

He laughs. Anyone else would be offended or at least scared that the other person won't talk about what just happened, but they have a different connection. Music is the one who unites their souls and for she to tell him something as powerful as ‘you are the music in me’ is almost as strong as an I love you, maybe even stronger. Practically her subtle, awkward and wholesome way of saying he’s her person too.

And that’s more than perfect for him. She doesn’t need to say a speech, much less now that she is not feeling well. The love she shows him in a thousand ways every day is more than enough.

He knows that when they both improve and logic regains territory they will have a lot to discuss about their new relationship, but the most important step has already been taken. For now, all he has to worry about is that the tea turns out drinkable enough and keeping her warm enough with cuddles and kisses on the forehead... maybe some more on the lips too.

THANK YOU FOR READING✨✨

#luke patterson fanfiction #juke #juke imagine #luke patterson imagine #luke patterson fanfic #jatp juke #jatp luke #charlie gillespie imagine #charlie gillespie one shot #charlie gillespie x reader #jatp imagine #jatp #julie and the phantoms #luke x julie #julie x luke #julie molina #luke patterson fic #luke patterson oneshot #luke patterson

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early20sfailingplenty · 3 years

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Uhm I like rock music, mainly classic rock like AC/DC, Guns n Roses, Def Leppard that type of thing. I’m a texture eater but I get called ‘fussy’ but just some I can’t do so I tend to live off pasta and sandwiches most days. I’m a horror fantatic, I love the old classics like scream or nightmare on elm street. Uhm I have an outgrown ombré that I need done but can’t due to lockdown 😂 Im plus size and trying to get round to loving my body even though I can’t stand it.. uhm.. oh I like reading and have an obsession with candles and wax melts. ~ @tatestripedsweater

Aaaaaaaaa ✨✨✨✨ I’m so excited to get to write this for you, Shannon, and I really hope that you enjoy this! It’s been a while since I wrote solidly for James (on my main blog, @ajokeformur-ray) so hopefully this portrayal isn’t too rusty!💜🌸

James March

Word count: 861.

Let me get one thing clear from the get go: you and James are perfect for each other! You have a very similar vibe to the one which James has and you would be at home within the Hotel Cortez in no time. No harm would ever befall you - “even a hair harmed on your pretty little head will see the assailant lumbered with the addiction demon, my dear,” as he once told you. You have no doubt that if he needed to, that he would make good on his promise, and you only hope for the others’ sake that they never try to test James. He does not mess around when it comes to you! Jazz and rock music are like chalk and cheese and initially was James very dismissive of your taste in music, “it’s just... noise,” he once bitterly complained to you. He can’t deny, try as he might, that you really do love classic rock, and over the months and years in which the two of you are together does James learn how to appreciate the different melodies and the poetic lyrics. Songs like Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeppelin hold a special place in his heart, for reasons he himself doesn’t fully understand. It’s no Benny Goodman, but James can admit that it’s palatable to his ears.

James never calls you fussy. He pays extremely close attention to the textures you like, the textures you love, the textures you can tolerate but aren’t fond of, the ones you dislike, the ones which make you gag... James catalogues every reaction and he makes sure that Hazel over ever serves you up food which you’ll actually eat and enjoy - what’s the point of eating if you’re not going to enjoy it? So most days that may be pasta and sandwiches, but James is just happy to see you eating! He’s very protective of you and there’s nothing which he wouldn’t do for you. Luckily, Hazel is really fond of you and many a time have the two of you had a conversation about her son and other sensitive topics, so she always serves you food with a proud smile on her face. For once, for once, she and her hard work are seen and appreciated and she has sworn to herself that if James ever hurts you, she’ll turn him in all over again. You and Hazel stan each other and you’ve got each other’s backs every step of the way!

Plenty of horrible things, made from the stuff of nightmares, go down in the hotel so James doesn’t fully understand why you love horror so much. Why bother watching a clearly fake throat get slashed with blood which isn’t even the right shade of red and splatters wrong, when you can shadow him all day and experience the real thing for yourself? Modern life confuses James but he won’t deny you the things you enjoy. The old classics are your favourite and James puts in a special word with Liz so that the hotel has a miniature cinema in which you can watch your horrors on the big screen! You’re a queen, after all, and he’ll treat you as such no matter what you say! Please just hug him omg he’s desperate for affection. James loves you - every single part of you is cherished! You are a goddess, a queen, but more than that, you are his goddess. You are his Queen. Daily does James lay worship at your altar and on days when you feel especially loathing of yourself and of your body, James is there with solemn vows of love and adoration. “You are a heavenly creature, Shannon. I am in awe of your beauty.” James doesn’t just say pretty words - he shows you, too, in whichever way you’re most comfortable with! It’s not uncommon for him to buy you an entirely new outfit (with the help of Elizabeth, who sees how deeply you love James and can’t help but appreciate you a bit more for it) just so that he can show you off! And if it helps you to feel a bit more confident, then that’s a bonus! Anything for his Queen...

You like to read and James likes to watch you read. The story plays out before him on your face. When you’ve done something which James feels you should be praised for (literally anything you could do), then you may well find that he’s bought you a new stack of books. They’re never wrapped or signed but you know that they’re from James because they’re always super expensive copies. You would have been happy with a simple paperback but James gets you a gold or silver embellished cover with painted pages and pictures. You also have an obsession with candles and wax melts and, again, James uses his outside connections to make sure that you can have those things. He loves you deeply and he makes sure that you know that at every available turn! He treats you like a Queen and you treat him like a King, because he deserves every ounce of it and more.

#james patrick march

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katie-dub · 4 years

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Rapture on the Lonely Shore

Fleabag fic

Summary: Social distancing has come into play and suddenly Fleabag finds herself unable to be close to her best friend right when she needs him the most, but will it bring them closer than ever?

AO3

It’s more Fleabag fic, prompted by a lovely new fandom friend who wishes to remain anonymous. Dedicated to @eirabach who is my hero. Thanks to @profdanglaisstuff for inspiring the title and for being endlessly supportive and encouraging, along with @ohmightydevviepuu and @thisonesatellite

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" I scream into the silent void of my living room for no other reason than there's no one here with me and I fucking well can.

I am handling this coronavirus shit like a fucking pro.

Tonight Bojo told everyone to stay away from pubs, restaurants and cafes, whatever the fuck that means. Hillarys is likely fucked. I think of Joe, my regular, wondering how he'll cope without Chatty Wednesdays and the food I provide, which could quite easily send me spiralling off into a major fucking crisis, if I weren't already at least 90% of the way there.

Like I said, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!

The worst part of it is that my best friend, my rock, my Priest is busy doing the Lord's work and visiting the housebound so I can't fucking see him in case he gives me the plague or vice versa. Apparently his God has a really twisted sense of humour.

My phone rings, mercifully dragging me from my thoughts.

"What are you doing right now?"

"Well, hello, Father," I say with a grin.

"Oh fuck off," he chides with a laugh, "can you go to your door?"

"Is that some kind of code?"

"Just open your fucking door."

Intrigued, I cross over to the door and throw it open. My Priest stands two metres away from it, grinning at the sight of me.

"Sorry Father, I've got to go, I've had a hot delivery." I hang up, watching his beautiful neck as he throws his head back and laughs. I love making him laugh.

The only thing worse than being mildly obsessed with your best friend who you can never be with because he's a priest, is being mildly obsessed with your best friend who you can never be with because he's a priest when you aren't even allowed to touch him. In a purely platonic way, you understand, he gives the best hugs.

Oh fuck off.

"What a line!" he says, calming down and wiping tears from his eyes.

"There's more where that came from."

"Save me." He holds up his hands in a gesture of defeat, I ignore it. I've got to get my kicks somehow.

"Have you got coronavirus? Because you definitely look hot."

"Oh God help me, that was bad."

There's a loud bang from in my house that startles me. I whip around to try and see what has happened, I hate it when He does that.

I hate that my Priest has me thinking that there is a God, and that he is messing with me.

I look back to see him smirking at me, raising his eyebrows as though defying me to comment on what just happened.

“Not that I’m not pleased to see you, but what are you doing here?”

“Do you want to go for a walk? I’d love to go for a walk with you.”

“Doesn’t that go against the rules?” I say, already reaching for my coat..

“We can maintain our distance, just like spies.” He has a twinkle in his eyes, delighted by his own cleverness.

I pull on my trench coat. “You wanted to be James Bond as a kid, didn’t you?” I bet he was a cute kid.

“That tosser? Fuck no, although I wouldn’t have complained if Miss Moneypenny had wanted to check out my concealed weapon.”

“Father!” I gasp in mock horror even as I try to hide the snort that escapes me.

"I wasn't always a priest," he says lightly, "you know that." He turns and walks back through my gate and onto the street. He turns back to me, smiling and waiting for me to join him.

"Oh fuck, I should wash my hands, shouldn't I?"

Look, I run a cafe, I understand basic hygiene, despite what Claire might think. But since all this started the hand washing has been intense.

He nods. "Safety first. It's OK, I'll wait."

And wait he does as I diligently wash my hands for a full twenty seconds, all the while thinking about my Priest waiting patiently out there for me. Or maybe not patiently? Maybe bursting with eagerness for me to get back to him?

Oh who the fuck am I kidding? That man has the patience of a saint.

I return to my doorstep, and pause a moment to enjoy the sight of him, shirt rolled up to his sleeves and hands clasped behind his back as he stares down the eerily quiet street. It’s magic hour and the glow of the sinking sun lights him up beautifully. He turns before I reach him, a beaming smile on his face. He tilts his head thoughtfully, apparently searching hard for signs of.. I don't know, distress maybe?

He nods to himself, a slight smile in his eyes and he turns to head out of the gate, stepping back and letting me walk ahead of him. What a gentleman.

"Checking out my arse, Father?" I toss back to him over my shoulder.

He snorts. "I'm more of a tits man myself."

Damn.

There go my hopes that he's secretly burning a torch for me, mine are barely there, any smaller and you'd need a microscope to find them. I do better with arse men.

But you knew that already.

"Aren't you a happily celibate man?"

"I'm a priest, I'm not blind. I'm merely appreciating the glory of God's creations."

"So you believe in 'look, don't touch'?"

"I believe that you're trying to get me in trouble. And you'll get a crick in your neck if you keep looking back at me like that."

"Not really much of a walk together if I can't look at you, talk to you, or stand anywhere near you."

"These things are sent to try us," he states calmly, completely at ease with the idea that his God has inflicted an Old Testament style plague upon the world. Like humanity as a whole is the villain of the latest gripping installment of His story.

The thought doesn't sit well with me. Admittedly, I probably deserve a little damnation, but the entire human race? Or at least our most vulnerable members? I thought the meak were supposed to inherit the earth?

I stop and turn to face him fully, enjoying the way he starts as though he's bumped into me, even though he's a full two metres away. It’s still not quite dark but the street lights have yet to kick in, so it's a little hard to make out his expression. I glare at him with his arrogant nonchalance. Next he'll be pulling some kind of awful but horribly truthful platitude out of his arse like "It'll pass."

True it may be, but it's hardly the fucking point.

We continue on until I spot a bench in front of me and desperate to actually talk to my friend, sit down at one end. He diligently sits at the other, hands in his lap, as he maintains the appropriate social distance. Seriously, fuck coronavirus.

"How are you?" he asks, looking at me with what I can only assume is deep concern.

"Well my livelihood and best friend's legacy -" there's a flash in his eyes that I almost want to call jealousy "- has been totally fucked by our prime minister, how are you?"

His hand twitches, an awkward jerk that gives me the sense that he'd wanted to reach out to me. He's flexing his fingers, grasping and releasing his knee, suggesting that he's buzzing with energy, full to the brim of untapped potential and excitement that belies his otherwise calm outward demeanour.

"I'm sorry, I know how much Hillary's means to you."

That may be one of my favourite things about my Priest, his willingness to just sit with sadness. Too many people rush you to feeling better, to reassuring you that things aren't actually as bad as you think. Not my Priest. He lets you feel what you feel. And somehow he just knows what people need, whether it's silence or speaking, space or physical comfort.

Not that he can give me that right now.

"It's just a café." I don't know why I'm so quick to deflect, not with him. He knows me too well to buy that.

"You don't have to do that,” his voice just oozes softness, treading carefully as he speaks like he’s dealing with a wild cat. His fingers are drumming on his knee again. “It’s ok to hate how fucked up this is.”

We sit for a minute, him patiently waiting as I try to gather my confused thoughts and feelings into something coherent. “I know that you think this is all about Boo for me.”

“Do I?” he challenges, I frown at him from the corner of my eye.

“Don’t you?”

He shrugs. I once again fumble for words. “Do I want Boo’s cafe to close? Of course not. Do I want what we built and I made into a success to be fucked? Of course not. But that’s not what makes me want to scream. It’s the people who need Chatty Wednesdays, who need someone to talk to, even if they’re just a stranger who bought a cup of tea in the same bloody cafe as them. It’s Joe who’s in every day and now I might never see again because this pestilence could take him. It’s everyone who’s popped in for a sandwich and has nearly cried with relief that I actually have bread because some dipshits panicked and bought it all. It’s just a cafe, but it - it matters.”

He huffs and when I look to him there are tears in his eyes. “Have I ever told you how fucking wonderful you are?”

“Easy there, Father.”

“No, really, you’re fucking brilliant.” He shakes his head. “I hate that I can’t hold you right now. I want to, so much. I want to just wrap my arms around you and bury my face in your neck and breathe you in. Maybe some of your brilliance would rub off on me.”

God I can imagine one of those hugs. They always leave me somewhere between cherished and horny. The feeling of his breath on my neck just feels so delicious, sending desire rippling right through me.

I should probably tell him, but it feels so fucking good that I don’t want him to stop it. And he probably knows the effect it has on me anyway. I kind of think he’s counting on it.

“Wanting to rub off on me, Father? What will the bishop say?”

Sometimes it’s just easier to go for the innuendo than handle all the feelings brimming below the surface.

He laughs. “You wish.”

I watch as he reaches out for me, jerks his hand back before reaching it towards me again.

“I want to hold your hand too,” I finally say, nodding down to his hand and reaching towards him with my own. Not trying to touch him, just to be that bit closer to him.

A silence falls between us. It’s comfortable and easy, although my thoughts are anything but. At last I notice that the sun has set and the street lights are on. Reluctantly I realise that I should go back home now.

My Priest feels it too.

“We should probably-” “I better get -”

We laugh as one and without another word rise to leave.

“Don’t catch the fucking plague,” I say.

“Same to you. Stay well.” And we both go our separate ways.

***

It’s been a day. I’ve been trying my best to keep the cafe going but with half of London seemingly already in self isolation and the other half frightened of people, it feels a little too close to the painful times after Boo died.

I’ve been delivering food to my elderly regulars, trying to do my bit to keep them safe. Taking sandwiches to Joe and chatting with him through the door to make sure he gets his daily interaction along with his sustenance.

It took Joe a long time to answer the door today. It filled my heart with absolute dread, I was on the verge of calling 999 when he finally came to the door, brimming with apologies. I was so relieved to see him that I nearly hugged him in relief.

And to think once upon a time he used to drive me crazy at times with his eager need to chat.

I really need to hold my Priest. I know I can’t. I just need to.

I text him from his bench in his garden asking me to meet me.

“Is everything alright?” he says when he appears, dishevelled and breathless, rushing towards me before remembering and standing back.

“No it’s not, I fucking hate all this,” I burst out, my eyes welling up. “I’m scared and I’m tired and my hands are fucking bleeding from how often I wash them now -” his eyes widen and dart down to my hands, his mouth twisting in distress “- and I just need a fucking hug from my best friend.”

A tear slides down my cheek, I don’t wipe it away, I can’t bear to wash my hands again.

He sits on the other end of the bench.

“I’m holding you right now,” he says. I side eye him. “Don’t give me that look. I’m holding you, don’t you feel how warm my arms are?”

I smile, it’s a nice fantasy, he does have such beautiful arms.

“You’re tucking your head into my neck and your breath tickles, but I don’t say anything, because it feels good to be close to you.”

I love snuggling into that spot.

“One of my hands is on the back of your head so I can run my fingers through your hair. You know that way you like? You always say it soothes you when I do it, your hair is so gorgeously curly that I have to be careful not to tug on it, easing my fingers through it and tugging gently.”

It does feel good, I close my eyes and just let myself get lost in the memories of the last time he did that.

“My other hand is splayed out across your back, rubbing firmly against you in circles where I can feel your muscles tight beneath my fingers. I feel how it relaxes you, as you melt into me, sinking deeper into my arms.”

I sigh, feeling some of the tension I’d been holding disappearing as he talks.

“When your breathing has evened out so I know that you’re deeply relaxed I gently move back and kiss your cheek, grateful that I can be here for you, whenever you need me.”

He stops talking, I take a few moments to just appreciate the deep calm he’s brought to me before opening my eyes and looking at him. He’s smiling but I can see the tension in his jaw that tells me it hurts him as much as me that he can’t do all that for real.

“Thank you,” I say quietly. What else can I say?

***

The Priest is staring at me so intently that I don't know how to feel. There's just so much feeling in his gaze, wonder and joy and this uncomfortable sense that he's trying to imprint me on his heart. It's only been half an hour since lockdown was announced and he's already losing it.

You'd think he'd be used to loneliness by now.

He asked for a video call five minutes ago. I’m not sure he’s actually said a word since we connected yet.

"Are you alright?"

He chuckles, eyes turning sad as he does. "No. No, I'm really not. I finally figure out what I want, just when I can't have it."

He's completely lost me. I don't know how to react, or if I even should. I feel like I'm intruding on a private confession, like he's forgotten he's talking to me instead of his God.

He starts fidgeting, dragging his hands through his hair until it looks as wild as I'm guessing he feels.

"You're too much, you know?" I start at the accusation, not sure where I come into this crisis of his. "You're so… No, it's not you, it's me."

At least it seems like he's confusing himself as much as me.

"When I think of this - this plague taking you from me -" he breaks off, choking up at the thought and grasping at his heart as though in physical pain.

"You don't have to worry about me," I downplay, "pretty sure those human viruses don't affect us robots." I force out a laugh, it's really not funny.

"Don't say that!" he all but snarls at me, "no heartless creature could love like you."

I don't know how to feel about this. He's never seen me in love. I'm not even sure if I've ever been in love, maybe once I thought I could feel something for him, but nothing ever came of it. And sure I still want him, I'm only fucking human, but I know enough now to know sex isn't love. A scoff escapes me, his eyes narrow in response.

"You don't even know, do you? What you do?"

I'm fucking baffled.

That fury that drove him before melts away before my eyes, and he's just so… soft. The way he looks at me is so tender. It's a bit much really.

Hillary squeaks indignantly at me from inside her cage, the best friend being mad at me is one thing, but the fucking guinea pig? Give me a fucking break!

"Look at me." I drag my eyes from the squeaking fluff ball. He lifts his hand up to the screen, I can't see what it's doing, the webcam unable to follow his movements. I kind of wish he was stroking my face the way he sometimes strokes my hair or my arms. A gentle affection that sparks something deep inside me. Not in that way, you dirty bastard.

"You are - everything -" he takes a deep breath "- I need you. I need to touch you."

"I didn't think you were that sort of priest," I tease.

"I don't want to be a priest."

"What?"

"Well, I do, being a priest brings me peace, brings me joy, but that's all meaningless if I can't have you."

He's not one to joke at times like this, but I just can't believe that this is real.

"I think you've had a little too much of the communion wine, Father." I chuckle. "You didn't need to drink it all in your congregation's absence."

"I'm not drunk," he seethes, "I'm in love. With you. If you don't feel the same do me a fucking favour and say it, don't just laugh at me." He glares at me.

My chest is tight, so is my jaw, this is all - is all - it's unbelievable. That's it: unbelievable.

"You don't."

"Fuck you telling me what I feel, you infuriating -"

"Bitch?" I suggest, leaping to the change in subject. "Oooh, or jezebel, that's a good one, biblical too, I know you like that." His hand goes to his face. "Don't touch your face, Father."

He drops his hand, staring at me in disbelief. "Are you fucking serious right now? I'm unburdening my fucking soul, and you're scolding me for touching myself?"

The urge to laugh at his unthinking innuendo bubbles up in me. I try my best to fight it, wanting to be serious even as we have a conversation that feels like it has to be a fucking joke. At least he seems to have realised his mistake, cringing at what just came out of his mouth.

"I just don't want to drive you to touching yourself, I gather your God doesn't like it." He laughs, it sounds ever so slightly deranged. "I mean, personally, I'm pro touching yourself, you might even call it my favourite hobby, but if you want to keep your job, best not."

"I touch myself a lot when I think about you," he replies earnestly.

"Can't stop tearing your hair out at your ridiculous heathen's antics?"

He shakes his head. "I love your antics. Please, hear me." There's so much sincerity in his voice, he's so earnest, that part of me finally acknowledges that he might really mean this, a tiny spark igniting in my heart. "I'm not joking or drunk or having a crisis of faith. I realised that this could be the end, and I couldn't live with myself if I didn't take a chance on this. I want you. I want to kiss you and hold you -” he’s being so romantic and I really do not know how to handle this. People aren’t romantic with me, unless they’re Harry and it’s one part romance to nine parts whining tedium. “- and suck on your tits."

That’s more like it.

"Oh my god," I gasp, feeling equal parts scandalised by his bluntness and confused by the idea of anyone being that interested in my tiny tits. I glance down, involuntarily thrusting my chest forward and shoulders back as I try to see what he apparently does. "They're not much to look at."

"You've got gorgeous tits," he says sincerely, eyes locked on them and lips parted for just a moment. He looks back up at my eyes and frowns. "You do. I see them and just want to -" he breaks off, biting his lip and twisting and rubbing his fingers in midair in a way that has me imagining those fingers on my nipples.

Christ, I'm going to hell for sure.

"If you don't stop all this dirty talk, you'll make me want to get my tits out and touch myself -"

"Please do."

"- it'll be so disappoint- what?"

"I mean -" he fidgets, going to run a hand over his face then remembering all the covid rules last minute and nervously fiddling with his sleeve instead. "Fuck me. I dream about eating you out, you know? I wake up from dreams of fucking you to find my sheets wet."

My mouth is dry. Just how are you meant to react when you hear that your best friend fantasises about you even in his sleep? And I felt guilty for wanking off to thoughts of him. You know, occasionally, when I was feeling desperate or he had been particularly hot one day or it was a Tuesday.

My vibrator was in daily use.

"Do you have any idea how hard it is to wake up with a hard on and not touch yourself? To just pray to God to stop messing with you and let you get through the day without looking like a sex-crazed teen who took viagra for a dare?"

I snort with laughter and he gives into the need to scrub at his face.

"Yes, luckily for me you can't tell how wet I get when you lick your lips and I have visions of sitting on your face."

He groans, sounding genuinely pained.

"God, I wish you would.” He’s so breathless, am I really meant to believe that he’s saying all this to me totally sober? “What if the world ends tomorrow and I never get to taste your cunt?"

I can’t believe this is happening, it feels much more likely that I have in fact contracted that killer disease and am lying in my flat, hallucinating through the fever.

"Lucky you believe in an afterlife."

"True, I'm sure they have 69s in heaven."

I’m not sure if they do, I mean, we’re talking about heaven, is God a fan of simultaneous oral? Does God even get to have oral? These are questions I never thought I’d consider, I don’t voice them out loud, of course, I’m a classy lady. "Do you really think so?"

"I don't fucking know!" His hands are back in his hair, raking through it, I wish they were my hands. "I just know that I want to be with you for real before I leave this world. It'd be a fucking nightmare if I got to heaven and found myself incapable of fucking you like you deserve."

"Right?" I’m pretty sure that I’ve already died and gone to heaven.

"Right." He nods, gazing at me like he’s staring right into my soul. Or through my top, something like that.

"So ... what happens now?"

"Well I love you, but I need to end this call. I'm in a very hard position right now." How does this man manage to look bashful as he’s telling me that he’s turned on by his own dirty talk?

"I love you too, for what it's worth.” I figure why not tell him? Chances are this isn’t even real. “Maybe we could help each other out? I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

"I'd rather our first time wasn't awkward video call sex, if it's all the same to you?" he says.

I’m sure I must be pouting but the man I’ve wanted for a year now, the man I’ve always known that I could never be with, has just told me he loved me, filled my head with filth and now he wants me to leave me to deal with that myself? It’s fucking rude. “I mean, one way to handle that would’ve been to hold in all the fucking sex talk.”

“I’m sorry” He does look contrite, but there’s a twinkle in his eye all the same.

“No you’re not, you love that you’ve made me wet.”

“How wet?” His voice has dropped an octave to a barely audible growl.

“Fuck off. You want me to tell you all the things you’ve done to me and all the things I’m going to do to myself then you stay on the phone for that awkward video call sex. Otherwise that’s between me and my vibrator.”

He groans in clear distress, I’ll be honest, I kind of enjoy it. The man has just got me all wound up and doesn’t even want to help me finish. Revenge is sweet.

Both hands are rubbing at his cheeks as he breathes deeply, before pulling them away and glaring at me, like it’s my fault we’re both turned on with nowhere to go. "Coronavirus has a lot to answer for."

"Well if you're determined to leave me to take care of myself alone, I best be going. Wet dreams!"

"I love you, you filthy heathen."

"I love you too, you dirty priest, good night."

He gives me a look that somehow manages to be filled with fire and tenderness, as contradictory as my Hot Priest himself. "Good night," he says at last, sadly reaching out and ending our call.

Right, vibrator time.

Unless.

***

In the history of spectacularly stupid choices I've made, I cannot decide if dragging a suitcase to the house of my best friend who just announced his undying love for - and vivid fantasy life about - me is the best or worst thing I've ever done. I'm not sure what I'd say if the police stop me for making a nonessential trip. And God forbid they look in my suitcase at the collection of lingerie, sex toys and lube in there.

We aren't allowed out of the house, what do you think we'll be doing?

I get to his front door and thank a God that I don't believe in for packing Pam off to her son's for quarantine, there's no way I could do this if she were here.

I don't know if I can do this anyway.

I should've had a drink first, though I'm glad that I didn't.

I have a momentary panic at the thought of having sex with real feelings, would that be making love? My throat is closing up and I'm finding it hard to breathe. Maybe I best go home, I might be coming down with coronavirus.

My phone rings, I pull it out and answer it before stopping to think.

"What are you doing right now?" my Priest asks.

Shit.

"I thought we weren't doing that?" I deflect, "but I can get out my vibrator if I need it?"

"Are you outside my house?"

I look up, he's staring at me out of the window, disbelief and joy spread across his handsome face. I nod, and he nods back.

"Come to your door," I say then hang up.

My heart is pounding, I'm highly aware that this is no ordinary hook up, this is the start of something… Something extraordinary. I take a deep breath, trying to draw in the courage to make this leap into the unknown, but it does little to calm my jitters. This is my Priest, my world, if I fuck this up - he'll be there to catch me.

I don't know how I know this, just that I do. Would you look at that? He's made me a believer.

I hear the jingle of keys, the thunk of the lock twisting, the creak of the handle.

I'm ready for this, for him, for love.

Now fuck off, this is private.

#fleabag #fleabag fic #fleabag x the priest #fleabag fanfic #katie dub writes #it'll pass

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sincerelybluevase · 5 years

Note

Didn't think all questions from 'Asks' could be proposed, so there you go: all the questions (1 to 96) or as much as you can!

Well thank you, nonny! I shall put these under a cut.

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed? Closed, because you never know what might be in there!

(2) Do You Have Freckles? I wish I did, but alas! My sisters do have them so jealous much.

(3) Can You Whistle? I can, but I can’t carry a tune I’m afraid.

(4) Last Song You Listened To. Almost by Hozier.

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour? It’s a tie between blue and red.

(6) Relationship Status. Taken, and happily so!

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now? 16 degrees Celsius, so that’s about 61 F.

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky? I woke up from a nightmare, so it wasn’t really the best sort of waking. That said, I’m not cranky per se, just a bit sleepy still.

(9) How Many Followers? 438

(10) Zodiac Sign. Aquarius

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour? Blue!

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily? Not daily; I take vitamin D tablets you have to take every few days. Before I used to take a different vitamin D tablet daily, though!

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower? No but I do talk to myself haha.

(14) What Books Are You Reading? The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien for a course at university, and Beyond Black by Hilary Mantel for fun.

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14. I don’t think you have to worry about Bilbo.

(16) Favourite Anime? Hm, probably Howl’s Moving Castle.

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of? I’m trying to remember when I last cried. Either in front of my gf, or in front of my sisters.

(18) Do You Collect Anything? Books and crystal skulls!

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch? Nothing yet, because it is still morning.

(20) Do You Dance In The Car? Our car isn’t big enough for that haha.

(21) Favourite Animal? I think I would have to choose otters.

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics? I watch parts of it.

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed? Well, I usually go up at 9.30, but that doesn’t mean I’m actually aiming for sleep at that point, haha.

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now? I’m allergic to make up, so no.

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean? Neither, because I hate swimming.

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog? How could I ever choose?

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water? I live in the Netherlands, which has the cleanest tap water in the world. Therefore, drinking bottled water is almost criminal.

(28) What Makes You Happy? Many things! My gf, my sisters, my dog, good books, writing, playing the piano, petrichor, warmth, hot tea...

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music? It depends on what I am studying, truth be told. I do both, though I always use instrumental music.

(31) Dogs Or Cats? Both.

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be? I don’t know. Probably a pastel blue, maybe orange?

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox. Sadly, I have had neither.

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean? Not if I can help it.

(35) Do You Believe In Magic? Define magic.

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing? I’m wearing a dress. It’s denim, therefore blue.

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue? I can!

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It? I’d like to say both, but I mainly spend it.

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You? Yes; my phone case.

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now? I wouldn’t call it an obsession, but I have been listening to Lana Del Rey’s new album on repeat, and I’ve found myself craving gothic books.

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly? I haven’t.

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People? No.

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams? All the freaking time!

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes? No; the air is super dry, the seats are cramped and uncomfortable, the food too little and not very good. I do like I’m going somewhere, though.

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry. The only thing that comes to mind right now is Shrek the Fourth, which is somewhat embarrassing, but really I cry easily with films.

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds? Sunflower seeds, though both are lovely when salted.

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be? Hozier.

(48) Are You A Picky Eater? I can’t eat gluten and I’m also lactose intolerant, so in that sense I am picky. If it boils down to what I actually like, I’m not.

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper? Not at all.

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning? Nope!

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write? Yes and yes!

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud? No because I am perpetually afraid I will damage my ears and go deaf.

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents? I have only ever carved a pumpkin once, so I am going to go with that because it is so new.

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up? Mrs de Winter bin ich! From the German musical adaption of Daphne du Maurier’s Rebecca.

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather) Transitioning from summer to autumn.

(56)What Are You Craving Right Now? Some free time so I can finish my first draft and finish the book I’m reading.

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed. No.

(58) What Is Your Gender? Female.

(59) Coffee Or Tea? Tea.

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About? I’m doing an English literature master, so I have homework all the time! I have to write a little essay about the letters of Margaret Cavendish, read LOTR, and choose a topic for an essay for my course on British and Irish fantasy novels.

(61) What Is Your Sexuality? Lesbian.

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning? Yes.

(63) Favourite Pokemon? Bulbosaur.

(64) Favourite Social Media? Tumblr.

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories? They can be fun!

(66) Do You Get Homesick? As a rule, no, but it depends on where I am and most of all with whom.

(67) Are You A Virgin? What a personal question!

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now? I don’t use conditioner, but I am using a shampoo bar by Lush which I don’t remember the name of, but it is for blondes and has chamomille and smells like lemon.

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free? What an American question! It is not really something I will have to deal with, living in the Netherlands. Still, if it came to it I suppose my car is less dirty than a crappy motel room.

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life? Yes.

(71) Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters? Portrait of a Lady on Fire.

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex? I don’t have one.

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now? I don’t really have one.

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest? That fully depends on the person those eyes belong to. As a general rule, brown eyes.

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set? I do, and yes!

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate? I’m eating a sandwich as we eat.

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone? Microsoft’s solitaire collection.

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not? I can’t give CPR, but if i could, I would, because I damn well hope someone would give me CPR if I was in that situation.

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight? Yes.

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network? No.

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People? Again, depends on the context.

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them. I wear one on each thumb and one on my right middle finger. Can’t take a picture ATM

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed? Closed.

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today? Brushed my teeth, made breakfast, talked to my gf. It’s 7.45 in the morning, guys.

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed? Nothing.

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now. I have face moisturiser and that is it guys.

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person? A day person.

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc. Candy crush friends, and Microsoft solitaire collection.

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened. Well this morning I had a nightmare where I had to perform an exorcism on a loved one, and it didn’t work. Come to think of it, I did try to bless them with ‘the father, the mother, and the holy ghost,’ so that may have had something to do with it not working.

(90) Favourite Soda Drink? Fanta or 7-up.

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite? My gf laughing, rain on leaves (I am not that much of a rain person though), birds.

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More? Sweats are more comfy, Jeans look better.

(93) How Do You Look Right Now? Tired.

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You. Music.

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want? I don’t want one. I am too fickle; I’d grow bored of it after a while.

(96) Favourite YouTuber? I don’t have one favourite since I use youtube for different things.

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talesofafangirlwithadvr · 5 years

Text

August Picks

And so we’re back for another end of month wrap up! Looking back I feel like I didn’t watch too many new things; I finished a few shows that I talked about last month (the 100, Blood & Treasure to name a few). I guess it’s good I watched less-maybe I went outside more?

Spoilers....

DERRY GIRLS SEASON 2

You all already know how much I love this show, so it shouldn’t be a surprise that I’m starting with it I was SO EXCITED to hear that season 2 was coming to Netflix August 1st and I tried my best to drag out watching the episodes. But it’s really really hard when there’s only 6 of them (a half hour each) and they’re just SOO GOOD! So I finished in about a week, but I guess that’s better than a day. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think I enjoyed season 2 more than season 1. I laughed so hard (and got a little teared up in the last episode-especially afterwards when it was over and I discovered that next season won’t start filming until 2020!) I LOVED the stories this season and how the adults got more of a major plot-line in each episode. At times I laughed harder at them (at the movie theater, Gerry making the sandwiches at the funeral). More people seriously need to check out this show. It’s hilarious and a quick watch that you won’t want to end.

KRYPTON SEASON (SERIES) FINALE

Syfy’s Krypton ended a few weeks ago, but I was holding off watching it until last week. I know I had said this in my last review, but this season was tough for me to get into, but once I did then I was really enjoying it. However, once we got to the last couple of episodes I was losing interest again. Plus, hearing that the show was cancelled made it harder to finish. SPOILERS! So, we knew they had to defeat Zod and it made sense that he is now under the Black Mercy (like Lyta was), but obviously this is only a temporary fix. He’ll definitely find his way out; he’s smart. Then Brainiac and Doomsday are still an issue, so while things are safe for now things didn’t exactly get settled. Now I get they thought they’d get a third season so things would have to be resolved later, but this still feels like a lot. Of course I’m upset that we won’t see Jor-El getting rescued AND the next season build up with Brainiac taking him to Earth to create his very own “Superman” seems really interesting. But we won’t see it. Meanwhile Nyssa is off world and Lobo is back (he was funny so I was happy to see him again). Like I said, I’m not surprised the show got cancelled, but I think a third season would have been good. What do you think?

CATCHING UP

ARROW

It might have been MONTHS in the making, but I FINALLY caught up and finished Arrow season 7. I was only 3 episodes behind, but it took me a very long time to complete. My main comments on this season was that the beginning was good and the rest was eh. I liked Oliver in the prison and while I was done with Diaz very early on I was happy to see that story-line resolved. Now, while I did take a very long time to watch this season in entirety (and that might be the main reason I feel this way), Oliver being in the prison feels like A LONG time ago (and a completely different season). When I look back on this season I really just think of him and Emiko who I was not a fan of. We lose Thea and welcome another half-sister who we learn knew about the sinking of the Queen’s Gambit before anyone else. The constant back and forth of trying to save Emiko got very repetitive and while I know Oliver as the hero could not give up on her fully, I wanted him to. I was also not a huge fan of the flash forward this year. At times I did like it, but I think the show did fine that one season when there was no added plot-line. The ending to this season was a disappointment. I was very curious how things with Felicity would end seeing as how she is not going to return for the final season. But overall it felt very much like a SERIES finale, which makes me worried for the last season. Will it just feel like a filler? How many people will return? Will we even be in Star City? Taking Oliver away like that sucked and I really hope he gets reunited with his children.

THE FLASH

As a big fan of all the CW Arrow-verse shows this past season I had a hard time getting into most of them and got VERY behind on episodes before just giving up on watching altogether. While Arrow was one that I was just a couple episodes behind for most of the year and Legends of Tomorrow I binged all at once the Flash and Supergirl dropped off my watch-list. This was sad for me because I had enjoyed these shows a lot, so now at the end of summer we’re giving it a second go! This month I began the 5th season of the Flash and am currently on episode 5? I only remembered the first 2 episodes, which shows you how long ago I stopped watching. I remember not being a huge fan of Nora West-Allen and this is mainly because they are making the actress seem a lot younger than she is. The mistakes she makes and her overall attitude feels better suited for a pre-teen/young adult rather than someone in their twenties. I’m still holding out hope that this changes as the episodes progress. I really love this idea of having Barry and Iris’ daughter in the past (because it feels very much like something Barry would do) and how they are still addressing the headline of the Flash’s disappearance. I feel like maybe as we uncover more about Nora’s past I will enjoy her character more. This season I like the return to the CCPD and Iris’ blog. Sometimes the alter-ego jobs get pushed aside and I am happy to see the return of Barry and Iris in the field as themselves. With this addition to her character plus the fact that Nora is being completely rude to her, I feel this is the most I’ve like Iris in a very long time. I love how she stands by her decision of keeping Nora’s powers a secret even though she hasn’t done so yet, and the fact that Barry is with her. I’m glad they’re finally taking her character to places outside of STAR Labs. I think Caitlin’s story-line of finding her father is really interesting as well as the origins of Killer Frost. This reincarnation of Wells will take some getting used to, but I already like his dynamic with Ralph (baby giraffe) and of course Cisco. (They are always the best.) I’ll continue watching and see if my feelings change, but I do feel that I’m getting invested again, which makes me happy.

MOVIES

Descendants 3

Should I be embarrassed that I am putting Descendants 3 on this list and I am a lot older than the intended audience? Nope. While this DCOM came out at the beginning of the month, it has replayed on Disney Channel dozens of times already so I feel I have watched it fully or in clips many times. Out of the entire series this movie is one of my favorites. I like the songs and the overall plot. The idea of having one of the hero’s kids become a villain was genius and really said something about people’s innermost character. My main problem with this part of the movie was that I wanted more repercussions for Audrey. In the end she almost dies and they bring her back and everything is good because she apologies. But her intentions seemed real at the start of the movie. Could they vanish that quickly? (Now I know what you’re thinking...this is a kid movie. Of course she needs to learn what she did was wrong. But I think it would be even more interesting if she didn’t or struggled with it. Either way she should have had some sort of punishment. I don’t think they should have welcomed her back so fast.) I really liked meeting new characters from the Isle of the Lost, the new addition of VKs in Auradon and Hades. I wish all the new VKs would have gotten more screen time as well as Hades. From the promos leading up to the film he seemed really important and the actual BIG BAD of the movie. I would have liked to see a little more of that. But I did really like learning he is Mal’s dad. I loved seeing Uma, Harry and Gil working with the Auradon group. Again, this drove the message home about working together now matter what your background. There’s probably a lot more I could talk about but these are really the main moments that stuck out to me/my main concerns. I know I’ll be singing the songs for a very long time.

Miss Austen Regrets

As a Jane Austen buff, it is probably very surprising to hear that I had not watched Miss Austen Regrets (2008) until last week. I knew about it, but am always cautious when it comes to a film adaptation of the author’s life; especially after Becoming Jane (which yes is a great movie, but not 100% accurate). It took learning that Tom Hiddleston was in the film to make me watch it. (I know, but just look at him. He’s got such a baby face.) :)

But a young and always good looking Tom Hiddleston should not be the only reason to watch this film (although it is a great reason). The movie focuses on Jane’s later years as she completes Emma. She visits her niece Fanny who is deciding who she loves and how to know what love is. In her early twenties, Fanny seeks advice from her aunt as to how to spend the rest of her life. Should she settle? Or wait for the man of her dreams? But what if he’s right in front of her? Her aunt, the author of romances, should have the answer, but in fact she believes she doesn’t. You get a little insight into some of Jane’s past loves and lots of echoes to Persuasion (one of the novels published after Austen’s death). I had just finished reading Persuasion for the second time and watching this film so closely behind it mirrored that tale of maturity, friendship and romance very well. Taken from the remaining letters between Austen and Fanny the movie feels authentic. Of course nothing can be 100% but I think Miss Austen Regrets does a very good job.

BINGEING

THE WALKING DEAD

And so the summer binge continues on. Gotta say that I feel pretty obsessed with this show now. You know you are watching a lot when you start to have dreams where you are fighting walkers. (And yes, that recently happened to me.) Currently I’m in season 5. Just finished season 4 this week, which I think might be my favorite so far. I really enjoyed their time in the prison and while I thought the episodes with the illness dragged at times, once the Governor returned it really picked up again. (Although I didn’t love the stand-alone episodes focused on him.) Then watching the group be separated and anticipating the reunions between them all was great. Terminius definitely seemed too good to be true and I am happy that (right now at least) it seems to be resolved. Now we are heading to Washington. I like seeing the new characters that I know will be a part of the regulars. It does make me nervous about some of the originals. Losing Hershel was tough. I’m not ready to lose too many more.

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theycallmebeccawrites · 5 years

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One Shot: Weekend Getaway

With Tumblr holding my original writing blog @beccaheartschrisevans captive (aka flagged as explicit), I have made a secondary writing blog and may end up closing the other all together. In the meantime, I am reposting all of my stories on my new blog.

Title: Weekend Getaway

Pairing: Chris x reader

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: language, descriptive sex scenes

Summary: Chris Evans and his wife go to Cape Cod for their 10th Wedding Anniversary

Disclaimer: This work of fiction is not to be reposted, used or translated without my permission.

18+ Disclaimer: This work contains sexual material that is for those over the age of 18. By clicking the keep reading link below, you are agreeing that you are over the age of 18 and are not offended by sexual content.

This story can also be read on AO3.

Three months into your tenth year as Mrs. Chris Evans, you are in the passenger seat as Chris drives the two of you out to Cap Code for a long weekend. This trip was attempt number three at celebrating your anniversary and Chris had been obsessing over this weekend for weeks. Not that you could blame him for wanting to make sure nothing was going to interrupt your romantic weekend away.

Getaway attempt number one had been scheduled for the actual weekend of your anniversary, but three puking kids had pulled the plug on that trip. The second attempt had been canceled due to a work emergency for you that had required you to work extended hours for an entire month to fix. Then Chris's work schedule had forced you to put off the trip until now.

For your getaway, he had rented a beachfront house in Cape Cod and he had taken care of every little detail. The only thing he had allowed you to do was pack your own bag, though he had offered to do that, too.

As you near the coast, dark clouds appear in the sky and the first drops of rain hit the windshield when you are thirty minutes from the house. You can feel the tension radiating off of Chris and you quickly switch the radio to a smooth jazz station, hoping it will help him relax.

By the time you make it to the house, the rain has escalated to a downpour and Chris's attitude is as dark as the sky. You ignore his insistence that you go inside while he unloads the car and help him carry the groceries into the house.

Once everything is inside, you direct him to the bathroom to take a hot shower and change into dry clothes. He starts to protest, but you give him the mom look and he stops arguing.

While he is in the shower, you set to work on the perfect meal for a rainy fall day: grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup. While the soup is heating up on the gas stove, you load wood in the wood stove and start a fire. You know that Chris will probably pout because you didn't let him start the fire, but it's the only source of heat for the small house and you're cold.

By the time Chris reappears, wearing a dry pair of sweats and a flannel shirt, your late lunch/early dinner is ready to eat and main part of the house is starting to feel nice and toasty.

"I'm sorry for being an ass," he apologizes as he sits down next to you at the table. "I just want this weekend to be perfect and the rain -"

"This weekend will be perfect because we're together," you cut him off. You squeeze his hand and then turn your attention to your food.

After you finish eating, you go into the bathroom to take a hot shower. Warmed up from your shower, you put on a long flannel night shirt and a pair of fleece pajama pants. You complete the look with a thick pair of wool socks and a pair of UGG boots.

Returning to the living room, you find Chris in the process of rotating the couch from being in front of the TV to being in front of the windows that look out at the ocean. You quickly step in and help complete the process.

"That's quite the storm going on out here," you say as you sit down on the couch. You can see flashes of lightning out over the water and it both excites you and makes you nervous.

"We're safe here," Chris assures you as he sits down next to you. He puts his feet up on the coffee table and you snuggle into him as you watch the storm rage outside.

You don't realize you've fallen asleep until you are startled awake by Chris getting up suddenly. Looking around, you see that it's not only dark outside, but inside, too. "What's going on?" you ask.

"We lost power," Chris explains as he uses the flashlight on his phone to read the homeowner's note about what to do in the event of an emergency. "Help me get the emergency stuff?"

Getting off the couch, you follow Chris into the kitchen where he grabs a chair and pulls it over to the fridge. He climbs onto the chair to get to the cabinets above and starts handing you candles, flashlights, a lantern and other miscellaneous things. You set them all on the kitchen counter and then wait for him to climb down.

"Should we light the candles or use the lantern?" he asks.

"Candles are more romantic," you say. "But I don't think we need them just yet." A flash of lightning lights up the sky and fills the house with light for a second. "Maybe just the flashlights for now?"

"That works for me," Chris nods. He takes his cell phone out of his pocket and sends a quick text message. "Alright, I told mom that we lost power and that we're turning off our phones to conserve the batteries."

You nod and take your cell phone out of your purse. You turn it off and then put it on the kitchen counter next to the lantern.

With a flashlight in hand, Chris leads you back to the couch. He turns the flashlight off and sets it on the corner of the coffee table before he lays down on the couch. He then pulls you down so you're lying on top of him.

"I thought we were going to watch the storm," you tease as you trace his bearded chin with your finger.

"We're going to make our own storm," he says cheesily. A flash of lightning fills the room with light and his blue eyes sparkle. "Kiss me."

You lean forward and press your lips against those of the man you promised to love and cherish until death do you part. Heat flares through you as you feel his hands grab your hips and his fingers dig into the extra flesh that two pregnancies have left behind. In the twelve years you've been with Chris, including those before you were married, he has worshiped and loved on every inch of your body and made you feel like a goddess.

Wanting to repay the favor, you end the kiss and start your descent down his body. You start by undoing the buttons of his flannel shirt, revealing his hairy chest. He has waxed it a few times over the years for movies, but you've always prefered him this way. You press your lips into his skin and breath in the scent that is him. You've tried to describe the scent in the past, but it's impossible, he just smells like him and there is no one else in the world that smells like him.

As lightning flashes across the sky, you swirl your tongue over one of his pink nipples. The roar of thunder drowns out his moans as you repeat the action on the other.

"Boobs," he says, hoarsely. "Show me your boobs."

Smiling you straddled his lower body and pull the long night shirt over your head. You drop it onto the floor and feel your nipples harden due to the difference in temperature.

His hands find your forearms in the dark and travel up your arms to your shoulders. He pushes your hair over your shoulders and then draws his hands down to your breasts. You close your eyes as his rough fingers massage your sensitive skin and you momentarily forget your mission to please him as he rolls your nipples between his thumbs and pointer fingers.

Another flash of lightning fills the room and you remember that you're supposed to be pleasing him. You nudge his hands away and then continue your way south until you are situated between his legs. His sweats are already tented from his arousal and you can't help but run a teasing hand over his manhood.

"Fuck," he moans.

You lick your lips as you grab the waistband of his pants and pull them down, his manhood springs to full attention as soon as the constricting material is out of the way. You feel his eyes on you as you stare at the beautiful organ that has brought you immense pleasure over the years.

Though you've manhandled him many times, your first caress of his manhood is timid. You glide your fingers down to the shaft into the small tuft of hair at the base. You take your time, letting your fingers walk and dance over the skin as he lets out pleasure filled noises.

Thunder sounds above as you finally wrap your hand around him, using some of his precum to lubricate your movements. You feel his heated skin pulsate under your fingers and lean in for a taste.

He curses as you sample his offerings and you feel his hips jerk forward as you circle the tip of his manhood with your tongue. Slowly, you slide him into your mouth, letting one hand rest at the base of his manhood while the other supports your weight.

The sounds he is making get lost in the crashing of the thunder over your heads and you miss his warning that he is about to come. You feel his hips thrust forward and feel his cock jerk against your mouth as the first shot of his seed hits the back of your throat. You're more prepared for the second shot and the ones that follow that.

His chest is heaving when it's all said and done. You swallow what made it into your mouth and then use your tongue to clean up what didn't.

"Come here," he says once you are finished.

You crawl up his body and lay your head on his chest. The storm continues to rage outside as you lay safe and warm in your husbands embrace. His hand caresses your back, sliding lower and lower with each pass, eventually pushing down the back of your sweats until your bum is fully exposed to the air.

You shiver as you part your legs and allow him entry into the fire that came alive while you pleasured him. His fingers dance across your folds and softly nudge the sensitive bundle of nerves at the top. One of his long fingers presses against the opening of your sex and you breath out a sigh of pleasure as he pushes it in.

A crash of thunder right above you startles you both and it is then that you realize that you have goosebumps, not from his teasing, but from the temperature of the room.

"I think the fire is dying out," Chris says as he slides his hand from your body. "Go to the bedroom, I'll met you there in a moment."

Climbing off of him, you grab your night shirt and go into the bedroom, letting the flashlight guide you. Instead of putting the shirt on, you toss it onto the chair in the corner. Your UGGs, socks, sweats and panties meet a similar end and you slip into the bed completely naked.

Chris comes into the room, a few minutes later, with his own flashlight. A sudden flash of lightning illuminates the room and you see his eyebrows shoot up when he sees your pile of clothes. He shuts off his flashlight and you strain your eyes to watch him undress in the dark.

Once he is naked, he joins you in the big bed and wastes no time in finding your body. He presses you into the mattress as his mouth comes down on yours. While you kiss, his hand slides down your body to the aching juncture between your legs. His thumb finds your pleasure point and takes a lazy lap around it, occasionally applying a little more pressure that makes you gasp in delight.

"Your turn," he whispers, ending the kiss with a lick to your lips. He kisses down your body, pausing for a moment to let his tongue and mouth say hello to your nipples, before he slides between your legs. He teases you with his fingers, at first, but soon that powerful tongue of his gets involved and he adds fuel to the fire that is already burning within you.

Your lower body rocks in time with his licks and it isn't long before your own cries are getting lost in the sound of thunder. He rides through your climax with you and is grinning like the cat that caught the canary when he sits up.

He positions his hard manhood at your entrance and slides into you, filling your completely. He leans forward and presses his mouth against yours for another kiss as he begins to slide out and then back into you. You meet him thrust for thrust as you drape your arms over his shoulders and press your fingers into his sculpted back.

Still not fully recovered from your first orgasm, it isn't long before he has you on the edge of a second. He drops a hand between your bodies and applies pressure where you need it the most. You cry out as you come for a second time and dig your nails into his back.

He curses your name as he continues his movements and, soon, he too is on the edge of climax. Feeling his body tighten around yours, you open your eyes and see the veins in his neck flare as he comes. He presses his lower body into you hard and holds your hips in place as he empties into you. In response, you grind your lower body against his and drop one of your hands from his shoulder to between your bodies. You bring yourself to a third and final orgasm, coating his manhood for a second time before he collapses onto the bed next to you.

Rolling onto your side, your snuggle into his body as you let the fatigue of the night's events overtake you. Not even the storm raging outside can keep you from falling asleep in the strong arms of your husband.

Want to find me off tumblr? I’m @beccatheycallme on twitter. I also post my stories on AO3.

My tag list is always open, just let me know if you’d like to be added!

#chris evans #theycallmebecca #beccaheartschrisevans #theycallmebeccawrites #chris evans fanfic #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fan fiction #chris evans x reader #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #reader insert

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sawcolor91-blog · 5 years

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15+ Freezer Meals to Make Before Having a Baby or Surgery

15+ healthy and delicious freezer meals to make and freeze before having a baby or surgery! Gluten-free, easy to make, and satisfying too.

IT’S BABY WEEK!!!

So wild to finally be able to say that! On one hand I feel like I’ve been pregnant for-ev-er, on the other hand I keep asking myself – how are we already here? Either way, this family of four is ready to become a party of five. Baby sis’ room is ready (she’ll be sleeping bedside for at least 3 months but Type-A here wanted everything ready anyway,) my hospital bags are packed, and we officially traded our cool card in for a minivan – a swap I’ve never been so excited to make.

Three words: STOW AND GO. Ok three more: POWDER SLIDING DOORS! I’m never going back. Ben is horrified.

In contrast to our large, empty van trunk, my freezer is filled to the brim with meals to thaw and eat post-baby. I didn’t prepare freezer meals prior to having Lincoln and really regretted it. Ben and I survived on so much Chipotle those chaotic weeks post-birth that it wasn’t even funny. Do you know how many Chipotle burrito bowls it takes to be considered unfunny? A lot, because that ish is good.

That said, I learned my lesson with Cameron and stocked our freezer with soups, snacks, and crock pot “freezer kits” prior to having him. Knowing I didn’t have to drag my butt to the store with a toddler + newborn more often then I had to, and more importantly make the decision as to what to whip up for dinner for quite some time, was life saving. I highly recommend that any expecting parent or heck, anyone preparing to be down and out for awhile after having surgery, etc., prep/cook/freeze as many meals as possible in advance.

That said, today I’m sharing 15+ of my favorite freezer meals to make before having a baby, surgery, etc. Not only are these recipes comforting, nourishing, and EASY, but they’re simple to multiply if you choose. For instance, you can make one Crock Pot White Chicken Chili freezer kit just as easily as you can make 10.

A couple years ago I wrote a big, comprehensive post on 50+ Gluten-Free Freezer-Friendly Recipes that you may want to check out as well. Not only does this post contain, yep, 50+ GF/FF recipes, but also freezing tips and what does/doesn’t typically freeze well. My two most important takeaways from that post are:

Do not freeze warm/hot meals – cool them completely in the fridge before freezing.

Thaw meals or freezer kits in the refrigerator 24 hours prior to re-warming/cooking vs cooking frozen or thawing on the counter.

With that, I’m officially signing off until baby girl arrives! One thing I also didn’t do after having Lincoln was take any sort of maternity leave (literally I blogged from the hospital – WHYYYYYYYY??) Taking time off to rest and recuperate after having Cameron was what I needed both mentally and physically at that time, and I plan to do the same with baby girl. Ben, the boys and I appreciate and cherish all of your well wishes, prayers, and excitement, and can’t wait to introduce our DAUGHTER to you! Until then…

XOXOXOXOXOXO

Crock Pot White Chicken Chili

Crock Pot White Chicken Chili is my favorite freezer recipe not only because it’s one of my favorite recipes in general, but also because you can freeze the chili after it’s been fully cooked then cooled, or as a “freezer kit” which is what I usually do.

Add everything but the broth, lime, milk and flour into a freezer bag then seal and freeze flat. Thaw overnight in the fridge then dump everything into the crock pot with the broth and lime juice and cook per usual. (Psst: I almost always skip the milk/flour step in this recipe and it’s totally fine.) Serve with tortilla chips and you’re set!

Click here for the recipe >

Crock Pot Black Bean and Rice Soup

Crock Pot Black Bean and Rice Soup is hearty and healthy – an excellent, nourishing meal to eat post-baby. Again, you can freeze this soup after it’s been cooked/cooled (wait to add the rice until the day you eat,) or make into a freezer kit minus the broth and cook fresh the day of.

Click here for the recipe >

Frozen Breakfast Burritos

An oldie but goodie recipe here on IGE! Frozen Breakfast Burritos are the bomb.com. Use your favorite fillings and tortillas then roll and wrap a bunch of these to stash in the freezer and pull out anytime you need a hot and hearty breakfast that only requires 1 hand to eat. I LOVE this recipe.

Click here for the recipe >

Signature Spicy Smoky Sweet Chili

The one, the only Signature Spicy Smoky Sweet Chili! This recipe freezes extremely well and it’s not only great for cool nights, but for game day too – just good to have in the freezer! Plus you can serve it in a variety of ways – in a bowl with cheese and tortilla chips of course, or over hot dogs, cooked pasta, cooked spaghetti squash, etc. Such a delicious, comforting treat to have when you’re super, super tired.

Click here for the recipe >

Mini Corn Dog Muffins

File Mini Corn Dog Muffins under: “totally fine for Mom to devour”, but also: “my kids are starving and I need something nearly instant, fun, and filling to serve them”! Bake/cool then freeze these adorable bites on a sheet pan then transfer to a freezer bag. Place as many as you need directly from the freezer onto a plate then cover with a paper towel and microwave on 50% power until warmed through. SO EASY.

Click here for the recipe >

Shortcut Vegetable Ragu

Shortcut Vegetable Ragu is my staple spaghetti night sauce and it’s super easy to double or triple the batch then freeze flat for future spaghetti nights. ‘Nuf said. :)

Click here for the recipe >

Mini Pizza Quinoa Bites

Because having a newborn can be stressful, and pizza is not. ;) Bake/cool and then freeze Mini Pizza Quinoa Bites on a sheet pan, and then transfer to a Ziplock freezer bag. Place onto a plate from the freezer, cover with a paper towel, then microwave on 50% power until heated through. Also check out my Mini Ham & Cheese Quinoa Cups, Mini BLT Quinoa Cups, and Mini Mushroom & Swiss Quinoa Cups.

Click here for the recipe >

Crock Pot Chicken and Wild Rice Soup

Another freezer kit staple of mine! Crock Pot Chicken and Wild Rice Soup is a wildly popular recipe here on IGE year-round as it’s healthy and comforting – just what you need after having a baby. This recipe is actually best made as a freezer kit vs cooking then freezing, so the rice keeps its texture. Add everything but the chicken broth into a freezer bag then freeze flat. Thaw overnight in the fridge then dump into a crock pot with the broth and cook according to instructions.

Click here for the recipe >

Mini BBQ Cheddar Meatloaves

Mini BBQ Cheddar Meatloaves are SO yummy! Assemble then freeze on a baking sheet before transferring to a freezer bag. Thaw overnight in the fridge on a foil-lined baking sheet then bake per usual.

Click here for the recipe >

Crock Pot Loose Meat

If you’re not from the Midwest, the concept of a “loose meat” sandwich might sound nuts, but I promise you they’re so, so delicious. Slow cook/cool then freeze the loose meat with a little bit of extra cooking liquid then thaw and scoop onto buns with ketchup or BBQ sauce, sprinkle over baked fries with shredded cheese, or turn into Sloppy Joes. Such a versatile staple to have on hand in the freezer.

Click here for the recipe >

Crock Pot BBQ Pulled Pork

Shredded pork freezes extremely well and stays nice and juicy on account of its higher fat content. That said, keep a couple bags of cooked/cooled/frozen Crock Pot BBQ Pulled Pork on hand for thawing then turning into sandwiches, quesadillas or adding to salads.

Click here for the recipe >

Taco Chili

Taco Chili is a family favorite. Each spoonful tastes like you’re eating a giant taco except you don’t have to go through all the fuss of toasting shells, chopping up toppings, etc. Add crushed tortilla chips and cheese on top then you’re done. Very low fuss for when you’ve got a fussy baby on your shoulder.

Click here for the recipe >

Crock Pot Carnitas

Crock Pot Carnitas is SUCH a winner. Thaw a bag of it in the fridge then crisp up portions in a skillet and top with eggs + avocados for a hearty breakfast, use in tacos, salads, etc. So versatile, and SO delicious!! Heck, I usually just sneak cold bites of it straight out of the fridge when I need a little protein boost.

Click here for the recipe >

Blueberry Oatmeal Breakfast Bars

Not only do Blueberry Oatmeal Breakfast Bars keep for 4-5 days in the fridge (if they last that long – I promise they won’t,) but you can also slice them into squares and wrap in plastic wrap to keep in the freezer. Thaw as many as you like in the fridge overnight to thaw, or discard the saran wrap then microwave wrapped in a paper towel at 50% power straight from the freezer to warm back up. Total win for healthy breakfasts or snacks.

Click here for the recipe >

Maple Cinnamon Oatmeal Breakfast Bars

Maple Cinnamon Oatmeal Breakfast Bars fall under the same concept as the blueberry bars above but have a slightly different, totally delicious flavor profile. I am obsessed. Also, I don’t know if there’s a specific “formula” or combination of ingredients that qualify a cookie or bar as a lactation-friendly, but I’ve had many women tell me they’ve used my oatmeal bar recipes for that purpose.

Click here for the recipe >

Apple Cinnamon Oatmeal Bars

Last but not least – Apple Cinnamon Oatmeal Bars! These bars are made without bananas so they’re perfect for those who detest the taste and/or are allergic to bananas.

Click here for the recipe >

No-Bake Cranberry Chocolate Almond Energy Bites

No-Bake Cranberry Chocolate Almond Energy Bites: because newborns = tired Mama. Seriously, the jolt of dark chocolate and dried cranberries, mixed with peanut butter, oats, and nuts, make for one DELICIOUS and energy-sustaining snack. Tip: instead of taking the time to roll into balls a lot of times I’ll press the mixture into an 8×8″ baking pan then slice into squares. Again, these keep really well for quite awhile in the fridge but are awesome to have on hand in the freezer for an extended time, too.

Click here for the recipe >

Healthier Zucchini Banana Bread Muffins

Like I said, having a newborn can be stressful but warm and squishy carbs can help. Freeze a batch of Healthier Zucchini Banana Bread Muffins then microwave wrapped in a paper towel on 50% power until soft before stuffing your face whenever ya’ need it. We understand.

Click here for the recipe >

Source: https://iowagirleats.com/2018/07/18/freezer-meals/

#read more #see more #check it out #interesting #learn more

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tenduelimagines · 7 years

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Just Look At Me

Pairing: Lafeyette x reader

I WROTE THIS IN 40 MINUTES SUCK MY DICK ha you thought ruby was only posting one thing well bada bing bada boom have some laf yall probably need it lmao

Word count: 1587

Request: Laf comforting the reader who is scared of heights at a carnival?

Feedback is appreciated :)

Today was supposed to be a good day. The “Hamilsquad” as they dubbed themselves or your four friends, Alexander Hamilton (the namesake), John Laurens, Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette, or Lafayette for short, and Hercules Mulligan, had heard about a carnival coming into town and seemed hellbent on going. You, of course, agreed and caved to their pressure when the three of them had assured you that Laf was going. Your heart did a little flip just at the thought of him. God, I’ve got it bad. You thought helplessly. Lafayette had approached you in Freshman year of high school, inquiring about the whereabouts of his classes as he was an exchange student. From then on, you had introduced him to the others and quickly developed a deep relationship which eventually led to you falling for him. Hard.

“(Y/N)? Are you listening to me?” Alex asked with a huff and a cross of his arms over his chest.

You jumped at the sudden interruption and rapidly nodded your head in false reassurance. “What did I say then?”

Grinning at him, you shrugged innocently. “Do you honestly expect me to keep track of everything that comes out of your mouth, Alexander?”

A snort came from the driver’s seat as John glanced to the back seat in the rear view mirror. “She’s got you there, bud.”

Alexander huffed and shifted in his seat, causing you to be pushed slighter closer to Laf than you really wanted to be. Currently, you were sandwiched in between Alex and Laf, an uncomfortable but also slightly pleasant position.

Just as you had started calming down from your mini heart attack that accompanied making contact with Lafayette, he wrapped a muscular arm around your shoulder and pulled you into his chest. “You looked uncomfortable,” He justified his actions with a wink.

Needless to say, you swore you could melt right into your seatbelt and puddle at his feet, ready to obey his every command. Who gave him the right to make you feel like this? It truly wasn’t fair.

The car ride was filled with teasing remarks from the other boys, directed towards either you and Laf, or each other, it was usually the former, and your cheeks nearly burning off. “Make sure to buy her dinner first!” Hercules stated; an account that had particularly stuck with you.

It’s not like it would happen anyways as you were almost positive Lafayette didn’t reciprocate your feelings at all.

You all tumbled excitedly out of John’s car into the carnival’s parking space, eager to begin. Your eyes sparkled with childish elation as you walked slightly ahead of the group, a cheerful skip in your step. “So what do you guys want to do first? The rides? Games?” You suggested, turning around to face them as you walked.

“Let’s do the games first! I swear I’ll win a goldfish this year!” John said, determination lacing his voice.

“That’s what you say every year and it still hasn’t happened yet,” Alex snickered at John’s reaction to his accusation and high-fived Hercules.

Smiling, and laughing along with them, you realized Laf was oddly quiet. Usually, he would be the one teasing John, or at least contributing in some apparently hilarious way, judging from the reactions he always got. “I’ve been roasting since the womb.” It’s basically his catchphrase at this point.

Deciding to be the concerned one, you pushed your anxieties away and fell into step with him. “Are you okay, Laf?”

He looked slightly startled at your “sudden” appearance and interest. “O-oh yeah I’m fine!”

Something was wrong. You don’t think you’ve ever heard Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette stutter a single word in his life, but here he was. That melting feeling returned as you realized he was stuttering, talking to you. Something oddly suspicious. No. He doesn’t like you, (Y/N), and he never will.

Your inner turmoil was boiling at this point and you almost forgot to give Laf some sort of acknowledgment. However, just as you had opened your mouth, John had beaten it to you, as your group had arrived at the goldfish booth, his carnival obsession. Each year, John played but never won.You all had been going for four consecutive years at that. John had not given up. That means I’ve liked Laf for four years now too. No. Not like. I’m in love with him. I’m in love with Lafayette. You could’ve sworn you were going to faint. With your heartbeat suddenly palpating, you gripped the table for support, pretending to be intrigued and paying attention to John’s goldfish ping pong attempts. He had bounced it in one of the top cups when your cheeks had finally returned to a somewhat normal color. Wait, top cups? John had finally won!

Your problems were momentarily forgotten as you launched yourself at John, pulling him into a victorious hug. John lat out a loud laugh and twirled you around, before setting you down to retrieve his glorious prize, getting free odd looks from the stand operator as a bonus. In all the excitement, you had missed the ill, possibly jealous look Laf had plastered upon his face. He wasn’t jealous of John’s Goldfish, that he was threatening to name Burr, he was jealous of that magnificent looking hug you had gifted John with. That sort of thing was supposed to be reserved for him only. What am I thinking? It’s not like we’re dating. Although I wish we were… Laf dug his hands into his pockets, filled with thoughts of rejection.

The games passed by as you all participated in the classics such as darts and ring toss, still reveling in Johns Goldfish that he had officially named Sharkira, as he thought the name was completely and utterly ingenious. You begged to differ. However, the group had come to a standby at the ride area entrance, arguing over what to ride first. “What about that one?” You asked meekly, pointing to a kiddy ride.

They all burst out laughing at your ridiculous suggestion. You could only manage a nervous grin. Laf glanced at you worriedly, easily reading your expression. While he had laughed along with Alex, John, and Herc, he knew your fake smile from miles away. You were a terrible actor.

It had been decided that you would do a run through the haunted house to “get in the mood” as Herc had put it. It was getting dark, and they had yet to turn on the night lights of the carnival, therefore surrounding the premises with an eery atmosphere. Needless to say you weren’t too excited.

The five of you came stumbling out of the attraction with Alex, John, and Herc all huddled together mumbling and shaking slightly, and you were latched onto Laf (without having fully registered the consequences in your fear stricken mind). Lafayette was staring down at you, cuddled into his shoulder seeking comfort, with an awestricken expression. One of pure adoration. Of pure love.

After a ride on the Scrambler, the lights had been finally turned on, casting a whole new mood across the entire park. “I want to go on the Ferris Wheel!” John exclaimed, running off towards the large wheel.

You gulped at the sight of it and shrank back slightly. “Mon minou, are you alright?” Laf inquired, shooting you a concerned look, that infiltrated you easily and took over your thoughts.

Does he actually care?

“I’m alright, just a little tired,” You lied, your mind drifting to what the French meant.

The Ferris Wheel is a living nightmare for you, with your deathly fear of heights after all. However, you couldn’t and wouldn’t bring down the cheerful atmosphere with your petty fears. As the employee was locking your seat bars into place (you had been placed with Laf of course and you had begun to consider the possibility of your friends conspiring against you) causing you to began to shake, anxiety flooding your mind. This, unfortunately, didn’t go unnoticed by the worried man sitting next to you. He had never seen you look so… shaken. Scared. Laf crept his hand towards your and laced your trembling hands with large, warm ones.

The ride started moving with a loud groan and a frightened squeeze constricting his hand. “It’s okay (Y/N). I’m here.” He reassured with a smile.

You nodded, feeling bad that he had to be stuck with you and your sweaty palms.

The Ferris wheel stopped at the top. It always did, and you were on the edge of a full-blown panic attack. Suddenly you felt a gentle hand pulling your chin towards the source. “Look at me. I’m here. Just look at me.”

The carnival cast a colorful sheen over Lafayette’s chiseled feature, radiating a mystical and ethereal aura. With the cool wind biting at your flushed cheeks, you gazed into the eyes of the object of your affections, longing to pull him in and kiss him senseless. The way he made you forget your current situation so easily and quickly was certainly something to behold and next thing you knew, you were leaning in. Feeling his warm breath disperse on your cheeks, you knew you couldn’t wait any longer. Your lips met in a flurry of wonderful release and passion, him placing his hands on your cheeks, holding you close. You swear he could hear your rapid heartbeat as the two of you parted, gasping as if you had just run a marathon. “Just look at me.”

#hamitlon #lafayette x reader #rip ruby 2k17 #its 2 am lol

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hawkland · 3 years

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Dear RarePair Creator

Thank you for offering one of my requests! I’m very excited to see what you will create, no matter which of my requested ships you go for. It’s all under the cut.

General Likes:

Vacation/travel stories. Being unable to travel this past year+ thanks to covid-19 has me desperate to explore and live vicariously through my favorite characters! So I’d love a story involving travel to somewhere new (to them). It could be a romantic getaway/honeymoon trip to somewhere special - and I love it when an author “takes me” to a favorite city/place of their own. Or two friends just going on an escapade together, maybe one sensing the other needs some time away from a stressful situation or workplace.

Smutty likes: I love extended kissing scenes, frottage, light restraint play, sharing-one-bed-for-~reasons~-ooops-how-did-we-wake-up-cuddling, bathing/caretaking an injured partner-turns-erotic, desperate/reunion sex.

Canon-divergent AUs - I’m always good with fix-its, shifts in canon that only change one thing and see what happens next or instead.

Cooking & food as an act of caretaking/showing affection - I love it when a character tries to prepare a favorite meal for their loved one (whether they succeed or not!) Food as a symbol of love or desire, meals as a time for opening up/having heartfelt discussions, etc.

Hurt/comfort scenarios - caretaking, desperately trying to save a loved one, confessions brought on by altered states/fear of imminent death...love them all!

Wingfic - for any of my angel ships and requests. Love stories and art involving their wings - as erogenous zones, needing TLC after an injury or molting.

Do Not Wants:

A/B/O dynamics, mating heats. (I do like Supernatural fics that explore Castiel and the angels having bird-like behaviors and instincts, however.)

animal abuse/death

anything related to pregnancy/childbirth/kidfic

formalized BDSM relationships

scat/watersports

unrequested alternative-universe scenarios such as high school/mundane/genderswap/coffee shop/fantasy/etc.

Completely sad endings/permanent character death or injury that isn’t part of canon

Rape/non-con between requested characters. Dubious consent is fine in situations like magic spells/possession/fuck-or-die, however.

SUPERNATURAL

Well, I’m a hopeless Casgirl if it’s not obvious from my requests. I just want my angel to be happy and get some of the love and affection he deserves.

Castiel/Indra (Supernatural) - This is kind of a silly one, but Indra the day-drinking playground guard was one of my favorite one-off angel characters. Poor guy stuck by his lonesome as Heaven is failing and not doing a good job of getting drunk. I kind of like the idea of Cas stopping by every once in a while just to talk to him, maybe try to get some gossip on Heaven but also simply for the company. Heck, maybe Cas drags him away for a little gay angel adventure! To show him he can have some fun on Earth too, beyond the play set (though, some kinky fun on the ladders and slide wouldn’t be a bad idea either.)

Castiel/Mick Davies (Supernatural) Castiel/Mick Davies/Dean Winchester (Supernatural)

Cas and Mick absolutely deserved at least a one-off hot sex fling. Or even something more than that? I’d love to see them working some kind of case together and Mick slowly getting Cas to open up and trust him. Give me an AU where Mick doesn’t die, or perhaps Cas visiting him in Heaven? (Could be post-canon when Jack has brought back Cas to help him, but before Dean dies?)

For the threesome, would love Mick somehow working on getting Dean to admit his feelings for Cas by setting up a situation for them to need to have sex all together. Or a fuck-or-die situation where Mick is perfectly happy to be in the middle of a Dean & Cas sandwich while Dean is freaking out over the whole thing.

Castiel/Mary Winchester (Supernatural) - watching season 12 gave me weird Mary/Cas vibes at times, I don’t even know. But maybe it’s something about them both being “displaced” individuals - Cas always struggling to understand human behavior and emotions, Mary struggling to figure out the modern world and how to be a mother to two now grown men. I’d enjoy something exploring that, or seeking mutual comfort during the time when Dean & Sam are in prison and seemingly lost to them.

Castiel/Benny Lafitte/Dean Winchester (Supernatural) - Can’t go wrong with Purgatory threesome smut, especially if there’s some jealousy and one-upmanship between Cas and Benny over Dean. It could have been fun seeing them interact post-Purgatory, too, maybe in an AU where Benny doesn’t end up dying/returning to Purgatory. Where it’s taken a long time for Cas to fully warm up to the vampire but eventually they find they have a lot in common besides loving Dean. (Both rejecting, to a large extent, who they are supposed to be as angel and vampire and instead choosing human connection?)

Anael/Castiel (Supernatural) - I like these two as casual (fallen) angel friends/fuck buddies. Just the idea that Cas has this one angel friend who is off doing her own thing, like he is, and they may not see eye-to-eye but they have a respect for each other’s choices and ways of doing things. So I’d love a story where they’re maybe working some kind of case/investigation together and, oh yeah, just happen to have sex because they’re both lonely and enjoy the connection even if it isn’t anything super serious. Alternatively, I wouldn’t mind something angsty set post 15x03 in the divorce arc—Cas goes to Anael when he’s at his lowest, maybe even hopeful that somehow she can help get Jack back? Or ease his pain? And it ends up turning into physical/sexual comfort.

Castiel/Rowena MacLeod/Sam Winchester (Supernatural) - I love the chaos twins Cas & Sam fucking around and finding out! And maybe needing Rowena to help them get out of some stupid bad sex/magic bind they’ve gotten themselves into. Or, Rowena and Sam are trying to work a spell together but they need a “special ingredient” that only an angel can provide...good thing they have their good buddy Cas around to help out...

CROSSOVER FANDOMS

Castiel (Supernatural TV)/Amenadiel (Lucifer Netflix)

This is one ship where I wouldn’t mind some bonding over being dads/kidfic surrounding Cas being Jack’s dad and Amenadiel being Charlie’s dad? Like, maybe they actually bond/work together as some dark force/being is crossing dimensions to kill nephilim? Otherwise any kind of situation where one gets transported to the other’s universe and is shocked by how different it is, and they grow closer while working to sort things out.

Castiel (Supernatural TV)/Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer Netflix)

Cas gets stuck in Lucifer’s world and can’t believe this version of Luci is actually...kind of nice? Understanding of why Cas didn’t want to just be a soldier for Heaven but found his own way with humanity?

Castiel (Supernatural TV)/Dean Winchester (Supernatural TV)/Lucifer (Lucifer Netflix)

More universe hopping shenanigans. Maybe Cas & Dean are tying to summon their Lucifer to trap him (or to get something they need for a spell to locate/save Jack from something)...and they end up with this other Lucifer instead? And he’s so charming and different they just can’t resist a little threesome fun. Or maybe Lucifer orchestrates to get Cas & Dean together via a threesome when he sees how much they’re pining for each other.

LAW & ORDER: SVU

John Munch/Odafin “Fin” Tutuola

Munch/Fin is one of my eternal OTPs so I’m forever happy to see something new featuring them! I’m always good for procedural/case-fics where they get together, or their established relationship is/puts them in danger. And this is one request where I’d love to read some AU-Genre or setting shift, reimagining them in some other situation besides police work. I’ve always loved the idea of John hosting a conspiracy/weird news radio show or podcast, and Fin as someone completely skeptical but who gets wrapped up in one of John’s mysteries. Or John as the owner of a bar somewhere that Fin is one of his regulars, and over time their friendship unexpectedly develops/deepens into something more.

THE POLICE

Stewart Copeland/Sting (The Police) Stewart Copeland/Sting/Andy Summers (The Police)

Yeah I’ll always request these ships even though I know it’s a long shot to find anyone else as obsessed about them as I am. Really anything at all whatsoever would make me happy for Sting/Stewart or S/S/A: Reunion Tour-era fic, early punk days before they grew successful, soulmate AUs… (soulmate trio, anyone?)

I’d also love a spooky story where they’re on tour/on the road somewhere and end up in a haunted hotel. Or their tour bus/van breaks down in the middle of nowhere and they have to seek shelter in an abandoned house or farm or something…and supernatural weirdness ends up affecting them or bringing them together.

HOMICIDE: LIFE ON THE STREET

Kay Howard/John Munch (Homicide: Life on the Street)

Kay/John is another one of my longtime comfort OTPs; I just love them both so much and the fun contrast they present. Honestly H:LOTS is one of my all-time favorite television series, period, and I’m always happy to see more fic for it! I’d love any kind of case-fic/action-type scenario where one or both of them is injured or in danger. The stress of the situation leads to a confession of or acting on feelings. Another idea would be a post-series fic where perhaps Kay comes to New York, needing John’s help to solve an old cold case (or one that’s crossed state lines to NY). Now that they’re no longer working together they have a chance to explore feelings like they never had before?

This is a ship where I’d also definitely love that food-as-comfort trope, too: I tend to see Munch as someone who has a secret knack for being a good cook, so maybe he makes something special for Kay when she’s sick/recovering from something and it reveals a side of John she never knew or saw before.

#dear author #dear creator #rarepairs exchange

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lendingamachete · 4 years

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Fun little story time:

So my birthday was on Monday and for some reason on Sunday I decided I needed to get all new bedding because “I should get grown up bedding that I actually Like so I can have a clear mind for fixing my life up” (you know, cuz BEDDING can do that). So I started out by going to Walmart where I found this 10 piece bedding set for $45.00. It had a comforter, matching sheet set, 2 pillow cases, and a bunch of little decorative pillows. I thought “Hey, if I get this I can’t just prop myself up with all these extra pillows and not have to buy one of those armchair pillow things.” So I picked up the set and started to walk toward the from of Walmart to pay for it, but then my brain said “No, keep looking, this doesn’t fit that sea foam green aesthetic you imagined!” 1) it was Purple Florals picked over a set of blue bedding because this set cane with colored sheets vs the white sheets that came with the blue set. I didn’t want White sheets. 2) I have never once in my life had an Aesthetic that I wanted my bedding to fit so I have no idea where that came from.

So I continued to browse the bedding aisles (they were INCREDIBLY sparse, this was one of 4 sets that were on sale that would fit my bed.) so after carrying this set around the store for 30 minutes I put it back because I decided 1) it didn’t fit my (imaginary made up never before had) Aesthitic, and 2) I wanted to get a Full size comforter because I like bigger blankets but y bed is a twin so the sheets would be too big if I got Full. So I left empty handed.

Later I went to Target with my sister where I found bedding that DID match my grown up (made up never before had) sea foam green aesthitic, as well as some (children’s) pirate themed Bed Sheets (they are supposedly Treasure Island themed, when I worked at Target I told myself everyday I would buy them and I never did -> I like pirates). While in the store I realized that the comforter didn’t come with any pillow cases and the sheet set only came with one pillow case so I would have to buy another pillow case (I had two pillows) to complete my Aesthetic look. They only had pillow cases in sets of 2, I couldn’t buy just one. If I bought a set of two I would have to buy a 3rd pillow or just not use one of the pillow cases I bought. Why would I buy three pillow cases and only use two? (This is my brain’s logic in action) I didn’t want to spend the money on a 3rd pillow so I left without the pillow cases and bought what I already had and went home. When I got home I started washing my new bedding and started thinking about the pillows and the Aesthetic. I started thinking about how I was going to have one pillow that matched and one that was random (and that’s dOeSnT work with this new put together “aesthitic” I made up) so after sitting there long enough for the sheets to be washed and dried, I returned to target to buy the two pillow cases and a new pillow to fulfill the new random need to uphold my “Aesthetic”. I spent another HOUR to go out and buy a pillow and a set of pillow cases to silence the voice in my head that said “BUT THE AESTHITICS!!!” When I have NEVER cared about aesthetics before and no one but me will even know about this bedding.

Does this mean I was/am having a mental breakdown or is this just normal “Late 20s” BS because I ended spending close to double the cost of the 10pc set for less of the stuff because of AESTHETICS!!

Another fun story for tonight. I came into the kitchen and smelled something that smelled like pickles. I don’t even really care for pickles that much but my brain went “I NEED PUCKLES NOOOOOOOW!” So I spent 10 minutes searching the kitchen, fridge, and pantry for pickles and didn’t find any so I tried to push the thought out of my head. 2 minutes of battling with myself and I thought “THERE IS AT LEAST 1 JAR OF PICKLES SOMEWHERE IN THIS HOUSE! FIND IT!!!” So I started the search again. (Again, still not a huge pickles fan so I’m also like “why do I care so much, I don’t even LIKE pickles.”) This time I found an unopened jar of sour dill pickles. I snag it, rip the shrink wrap off, place it on the counter and take the lid off. I then pulled out a slice of pickle and ate it so quickly I didn’t even taste it, then almost choked when the vinegar dried the roof of my mouth and I started to cough. After that I pulled out another slice and actually took the time to taste it and chew fully, then another and another. Then my brain said “MAKE THE PICKLE AND PB SANDWHICH” to which I replied “Ew No, why?” So then I googled what people usually make it out of and I found 50% Bread and Butter Pickles, 50% Sour Dill. I had Sour Dill. Which didn’t sound like that great of a combo (not that pickles and PB sounds that great anyway..) so then since my brain was like “you either eat this whole jar of pickles or make the sandwich” I made a half sandwhich with peanut butter and 1 pickle slice (these were the long lengthwise slices) and then I ate the sandwich (it wasn’t TERRIBLE BUT I don’t think it will EVER be my GO TO). After eating the sandwich I went back into the kitchen for a drink and ate two more slices of pickles BEFORE getting a drink. By the time I FINALLY silenced the Pickle voice/Craving I had eaten between 1/3 and 1/2 of the jar.

I DONT EVEN LIKE PICKLES THAT MUCH!!

What the heck is wrong with me? Why did I obsess over bedding and pickles? Why is this happening?

#bedding #pickles #dill pickles #peanut butter #AESTHETICS #SEA FOAM GREEN #pickles and peanut butter sandwich #mental breakdown #late 20s #what is happening to me?#i dont care about aesthetics!

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jeninthegarden · 5 years

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2019 Seed List

Yes, I already bought everything. No dithering this year. But the seed catalogues keep coming. Must resist buying anything more.

I feel like this is a very modest seed list compared to some years. It feels plausible, and sufficient. Okay, I got a little crazy with the broccoli. But otherwise I feel I was very restrained. I did not buy any herb or flower seeds because I usually just pick those up as plants in the local nursery.

Legumes:

Peas – “Lincoln”, from Park Seed is a standard, heat tolerant, high yielding pea variety I have grown before and saved seeds for five years successively. Park Seed’s “Sugar Sprint” is an extra early, extended harvest variety that can be planted spring and fall.

Runner beans- So, I have successfully grown scarlet and emperor runner beans which are red flowering. And I have grown painted lady which is candycane stripe flowering, but this time I am trying a hybrid white flowering from Park Seeds called “Stardust” – “a cross of a succulent, tender French dwarf bean with a robust, vigorous runner! The result of many years of breeding, Stardust delivers generous yields of huge, delectable foot-long pods on handsome climbing plants.”

Bush beans- Park Seed’s “Velour” is a compact, bush-habit plant, very heavy-bearing bright purple, stringless pods over a long season.

Fruits:

Tomatoes – Going with Park Seeds because they offer smaller seed packs so you can grow a greater variety: Black Krim, Big Rainbow, Mortgage Lifter, Purple Cherokee, San Marzano paste, Giant paste

Corn – Why? It never works out. But I cannot resist the 3 sisters method of planting corn beans and squash together. So this year I am trying Burpee’s Maple Candy sweet corn. I don’t have high expectations about producing muck corn, but, the beans need something to climb so why not.

Eggplant – Hold my horses! I get fixated on all the different types of eggplant I could grow BUT: the Thai green and berry, Louisiana long green and Indian brown need more heat than we get; the Turkish orange variety are too bitter; the Israeli baladi purse eggplant don’t germinate well; the ghost white are bland, as are the rose pink. I need to grow standard black for roasting, and Japanese long for stir fry and grilling. So I am going with a Terratorial Seed’s traditional Italian black eggplant that fruits prolifically over 3 months, and the “millionaire” variety that is a long, black Japanese variety.

Pepper – I’m just really over bell peppers. Last year they were copious but got sunburned and rotted because I just didn’t pick them. I find myself buying bags of small, sweet red and yellow peppers, so maybe I will try growing small sweet mixes. I am going to try some hybrid sweet/hot varieties. Mix/match 3 pack of plants: sweet/spicy jalapeno, sweet/smoky cayenne, and sweet/fruity habanero from Burpee.

Zucchini – one zucchini plant will feed a family of four for a year. Everyone fixates on baby zucchinis and despises the baseball bat sized. I really love eating the blossoms, but since I bought the vegetable spiral cutter, I find that a nice, midsized (10 inches long and 3 inches diameter) zucchini has starchier flesh and makes superior vegetable noodles either spiral cut like spaghetti or thin sliced ribbons for lasagna or raviolis. They also make much creamier zucchini fries. Burpee fordhook heirloom is an excellent staple, but the Burpee’s Sure Thing variety really does well with less sun, and is very resistant to powdery mildew so I’m going with that one.

Cucumber-these are like peas, there are never enough of them. They make wonderful pickles, salads, soups, cocktails. They taste great with lemon, watermelon, cabbage, vodka, lemonade, tomatoes, salt, sugar, sour cream, onions, feta cheese, smoked salmon, crab, and caviar. This year I am trying Territorial Seed’s “Bushy” pickling gerkin because it is early fruiting and compact bush vining to save space.

Melon- need something that will grow fast. I can’t trust the summer to be hot enough long enough, so I focus on varieties that grow in the northern plains or Canada. However, Burpee has developed a cantaloupe they say is mango-flavored, so I’m going to give it a try.

Pumpkin- I am beyond jack-o-lanterns. I really want to grow pumpkins I can eat. They are so healthy for you and you get more meat per fruit than you do from sweet potatoes. Roast pumpkin like squash (it IS squash), dice it into wild rice pilaf, mash it like sweet potato, mix it into bread, pasta, pancakes, waffles. I am going with Burpee’s Cherokee bush pumpkin – shorter vines and more pumpkins, dry, yellow meat good for baking. (But I still have some Dill's Altantic Giant seeds left from last year and it would be a shame not to plant them...)

Squash: I know the bush pumpkins and bushy cucumbers, and the mango melons are good enough for the three sisters planting, but I really like delecata squash so I am going to try Territorial Seed’s “Honeybush” which is a little larger and more tan color than a standard delecata.

Okra – Burpee’s “Okra Go Big”, I have recently learned that I really like okra blistered and dipped in chili salt and humus. And, a member of the local garden club grew two big bushes of it last season. This is a seven foot tall bush okra, so I’m jumping into the first attempt at growing okra in a big way.

Roots:

Radish- why, why try again? I am obsessed with the giant varieties I have tasted at the farmer’s market. Black Spanish radishes stuffed with clams oreganata, watermelon daikon thin sliced and wrapped like mini tacos around roast duck. I have selected Territorial Seed’s Watermelon daikon (very crisp, large and sweet) and Spanish black radish (very large, firm and spicy like horseradish).

Beets- they are such a staple, so versatile, but taste so good with goat cheese. I also like them pickled. One of my biggest mistakes with beets is that I don’t thin them ruthlessly enough, even though I really like the greens. (Um, so how about planting tape, Jen? Nah, too complicated. Um, they sell it with the seeds already stuck to it at the right intervals, Jen…Nope, not doing it.) So this year I have chosen Territorial Seed’s cylindrical beets because they are more carrot shaped and don’t need to be thinned as much.

Turnip- they are soooo delicious pickled I like them better than pickles. They can also be mashed like mashed potatoes, with horseradish and scallions. But I get a little crazed about the tops, because those are really tasty too. So this year I am being very extravagant and growing both Park Seed’s standard purple top white globe which is a national standard turnip grown in spring or fall and Park Seed’s Alamo hybrid that produce big greens with rapid regrowth for multiple harvests, and is bolt resistant.

Carrot- we eat lots of carrots. I have to say the yellow varieties are really the sweetest. But Dan likes the heavy orange stew carrots for cooking. So I’m going with Park Seed’s rainbow mix, six inch regular season carrots and Park Seed’s sow all season big Nantes type orange carrot

Not going to try celeriac again. And I am not growing rutabaga either. The burdock went to seed last fall so that is already sown – I am not growing it, but I will certainly harvest it. I might transplant some to the new bed by the west wall since it is a weed and I don’t care if the deer eat it. Similarly, I have salsify and scorzonera seeds left over, and they are actually perennials that bloom, so I might plant them in clumps by the west wall.

Potatoes- a root? Not really (not according to crop rotation charts), but it grows below ground, or it should. I’ve been dithering about with grow buckets the last 4 years with limited success while they’ve been thriving in random spots where they’ve been composted, so this year they go back in the ground. I like the purple potatoes best, but I’m going to do the red white and blue mix: Yukon gold, Colorado Red and Purple Viking.

Greens:

Orach: deep magenta, slightly velvety, spade shaped leaves on an 18 inch stalk. It tastes like spinach but takes up less space and looks stunning in salad.

Claytonia: It is a succulent green that looks like a bouquet of little lily pads. “This annual green is high in vitamin C, and native to many moist areas of the country. The leaves are rather heart-shaped, and provide a substantial addition to salads and sandwiches. Probably the most cold tolerant of the greens, Miner's Lettuce will grow year-round in the cloche, greenhouse, or even unprotected in the maritime Northwest. Quickly regrows after harvest.”

Lettuce: romaine lettuce, of course. But I saw a lovely pale pink variety in the store and I can’t find seeds anywhere, so I am going with a good sturdy standard from Territorial Seed, “Winter Density” early growing, compact but round head – not the “Eiffle Tower” tall and pointy stull you buy in the store.

Escarole: My new favorite green for braising and for making green crisp chips. I’ve stopped throwing it into soup and started cooking it as a side dish. It is also nice in stuffed pork chops, or wrapped around chicken breast. Park Seeds has a tight, lettuce head looking escarole that is thick steamed but compact and space saving.

Chard: Burpee’s “Bright Lights” rainbow colored chard. Again, the fordhook is very good and reliable, but I like the colored variety better.

Arugula: standard roquette, large, round heading plant, fully flavor, cold hardy. Nothing fancy about this one. It goes to seed, prolifically in the fall, but also winters over for a second year. And I’ll be able to save seeds and replant for several years.

Spinach: Burpee’s Space hybrid is a 3 season spinach that is long growing and slow bolting.

Brassica:

Cabbage: I love cabbages. I get poetic about them. The chickens love cabbages too. This year I am focused on something that will “hold in the field” through the fall. So this year I am planting Territorial Seed’s “January King” green, slightly flattened with burgundy markings on the wrapper leaves of 3-5 pound heads.

Portuguese kale: Tronchuda Beira from Burpee is enormous with 24 inch leaves, and sweeter than most kale. Very heat tolerant.

Cauliflower: looking for the earliest harvesting type of white cauliflower. The orange cauliflower tastes like squash and the purple variety like beets. I want just plain white, small, numerous heads. Going with Territorial Seed’s “Snow Crown”. “Always mild and sweet. Its hybrid vigor and rapid growth make it one of the easiest to grow of all early cauliflower varieties. It forms fully domed curds in heads 7-8 inches across, weighing 1-2 pounds. This variety maintains its prime eating quality for up to 10 days in the garden. May manifest a delicate pink blush when maturing in the hotter parts of summer.”

Collards: Portuguese kale looks a lot like collards, but collards taste like collards and are much cold hardier. So I am focusing on collards that are really late maturing, so they won’t overlap with the Portuguese kale. Territorial Seeds “Flash” is fast growing and re-growing, and a little more compact and upright to withstand snow. We’ll see if we can grow it early and late.

Broccoli: Again, somebody hold my horses! I’m going overboard on the broccoli. Trying Territorial Seed’s three hybrid sprouting broccolis for 4 seasons of this vegetable-

Spring/Summer: Aspabroc: “This gourmet quality baby broccoli or broccolini produces tender, delicious, elongated stems topped with small, domed, 2 1/2 inch florets. After the initial central stem is cut, the plants continue developing side shoots for repeated cuttings. Aspabroc has a nice, upright habit that lends itself to tight plantings.”

Summer/Fall: Rudolph: “Enjoy fresh broccoli for the December holidays with this winter sprouting variety. Rudolph is an English favorite because it is ready for harvest long before the other sprouting broccoli. Can be planted in mid-July, to produce an abundance of full flavored spears by mid-December.”

Fall/Winter: Rioja: “Bred to overwinter and slide into a late February to March harvest window when fresh food from the garden is scarce. A productive, bright purple sprouting broccoli. Vigorous plants reach about 24-28 inches tall with easy-to-pick heads.”

And, because they seem to go with the brassicas in planting rotations, the alums.

Leek: Have to have leeks for the Leeky Dance. Going with the standard “Lancelot” from Territorial Seed.

Onion: The gourmet mix of red and white Cipollini onions, from Territorial Seed.

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nextdestinationunknown · 5 years

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Day 53 (7/23/14): Portland, OR | Vancouver, WA

It was still raining today, but I was feeling better and wasn’t going to let the rain get in my way. I was determined to get some donuts! For those of you who know me, you’re aware that I have a slight infatuation with donuts. Okay, okay…truth be told, I’m intensely passionate about donuts and am completely obsessed with them. Justin and I had seen Voodoo Doughnuts featured in an episode about donuts on the Travel Channel back in Albuquerque, NM and knew we had to visit the donut shop when we made it to Portland.

First thing this morning, we headed straight to Voodoo Doughnuts in downtown Portland where we waited in line in the rain for about 20 minutes. As we were waiting, we wondered if the line was similar to amusement park lines where you get inside only to realize that the line actually wraps around a dozen more times before you get to the front. Luckily that wasn’t the case though. The wait went by fairly fast as I was entertained by the fun, glittery exterior walls.

Once inside, you’re greeted by the funky interior décor of the shop and a colorful rainbow of donut delicacies. Next thing you know, you’re at the front of the line and are overwhelmed by all the choices and variations of cake and doughy deliciousness. You really can’t go wrong though, each donut has it’s own charm. Even though I’ve had better, cheaper donuts, it was still a fun experience to eat a Voodoo Doll doughnut and a Maple Blazer Blunt doughnut.

Bridge over the Columbia River between Portland, OR and Vancouver, WA

After indulging in sweet, delicious fried dough goodness, we took a day trip across the bridge over the Columbia River into Vancouver, WA. We were considering living in Vancouver as it’s still extremely close to Portland (less than 10 miles), but the housing is considerably cheaper. Also, Washington has no state income tax, whereas Oregon has no sales tax. So if you live and work in Washington, but make your purchases in Oregon, you get the best of both worlds by not having to pay state income tax or sales tax. Score!

Once we crossed state lines into Washington, we headed to the Nordstrom in Vancouver. We like to see where the Nordstroms are located in different places, as those seem to be the best areas. So far, it’s proven to be a pretty good rule of thumb, as have the locations of Whole Foods. However, after seeing both the Nordstrom and the nearest Whole Foods, we decided that Vancouver is not what we’re looking for in our next place to settle down. We’d really like to find a place that’s charming with eclectic shops and restaurants. While Vancouver had a lot of convenient chain restaurants and stores, it was a little too basic and cookie-cutter for us.

Day 54 (7/24/14): Mount St. Helens National Volcanic Monument, WA | Portland, OR | Columbia River Gorge National Scenic Area, OR

Mount St. Helens blocked by clouds 😦

We chose today to visit Mount St. Helens, which ended up not being the best decision. The past few days had been rainy and overcast, and today was no different, which apparently is not the best time to view the volcano. We drove nearly 2 hours from our campground outside of Portland through Washington to the Johnston Ridge Observatory at the end of Highway 504 to view Mount St. Helens, only to discover that clouds were completely blocking it, making the volcano impossible to see. Such a disappointment! After waiting about half an hour in the cold rain to see if the clouds would clear, we finally gave up. We still saw some nice views along the way though. A friendly tip, if you’re planning on seeing any mountains, such as Mount St. Helens, be sure to check the weather report for rain and clouds.

Wahkeena Falls

Even though the drive to and from Mount St. Helens had already made it a long day, we didn’t want the day to be a complete waste. We headed back towards Portland and took a detour to the Columbia River Gorge National Scenic Area. Our first stop was Wahkeena Falls. While we enjoyed the lovely waterfall streaming through the trees, it didn’t even compare to our next stop in the gorge: the historic and magnificently picturesque Multnomah Falls. As the tallest waterfall in Oregon, Multnomah Falls consists of an impressive upper falls and a lower falls cascading a total of approximately 620 feet behind the Benson Footbridge, making for quite an impressive scene.

Multnomah Falls

The crowd

The restaurant, gift shop, snack bar, restrooms, etc.

As gorgeous as the falls were though, I was expecting them to be more “natural,” but they’re actually quite touristy and very crowded at the base. There’s a parking lot, gift shop, restaurant, snack bar and restrooms, nice restrooms at that (then again, at this point, I consider any restrooms with toilet seat covers to be “nice” as they seem to be hard to come by on our travels). Lending to the tourism are soda cups, water bottles and other trash strewn at the viewing point below the bridge along with coins tossed in the pool of water. As irritating as that is though, the waterfalls and bridge are still a beautiful must-see.

Next we made a quick stop at Latourell Falls where we caught a glimpse of the steep and narrow waterfall. Our final stop in the Columbia River Gorge was the Vista House. The surrounding panoramic views of the Columbia River from the observatory were absolutely stunning! This was the perfect end to our day as well as our visit to the gorge.

Latourell Falls

Vista House

Day 55 (7/25/14): Mount Rainier National Park, WA | Mount St. Helens National Volcanic Monument, WA | Portland, OR | Columbia River Gorge

We were planning on seeing Mount Rainier today, and as luck would have it, the rain finally let up! With it being a clear, sunny day, we also decided to take our chances with trying to see Mount St. Helens again since it’s only about 95 miles away from Mount Rainier. We were bound and determined to catch a clear glimpse of Mount St. Helens. We did our homework this time though and found out that the afternoons are usually the best time to see Mount St. Helens as there tend to be more clouds in the morning. Therefore, we headed to Mount Rainier first.

Unfortunately though, we didn’t have too much time at Mount Rainier National Park since it took about 2.5 hours to get there, and we knew it would then take probably another 2 hours to get to Mount St. Helens. However, while heading up to Paradise at Mount Rainier National Park, we stopped at Narada Falls. You can see the top of the falls from the parking lot. There’s also a bridge you can walk over for a nice viewpoint of the waterfall.

Narada Falls

But to get the best view of the falls and truly be able to appreciate them, you absolutely must take the short walk down the nearby trail. Seeing the waterfall from below gives you a completely different and absolutely breath-taking view! Narada Falls is the most stunning waterfall I’ve seen yet! The width of it alone is impressive, but there was also a vibrant rainbow at the base of the falls. The rainbow was a huge bonus to the already gorgeous waterfall, but the combination two made for one of the most incredible sights I’ve ever seen! Absolutely amazing!

We continued our drive and were treated to a divine scent of fresh, crisp mountain air mixed with the fragrances of pure white snow, colorful wildflowers and dense forest trees. By the time we reached Paradise, clouds had started rolling in and obscuring the view of Mount Rainier, but we were still able to catch some impressive glimpses of blue ridges of ice and snow along the mountain. The rugged texture was fascinating. Since the clouds wouldn’t let us fully appreciate Mount Rainier, we left the park and headed back to Mount St. Helens.

Narada Falls

Mount Rainier

When we reached the Johnston Ridge Observatory at the end of the highway, the view of the volcano was better than the rainy day before, but there were still some clouds in the way. However, we noticed that the clouds were moving, so we decided to stick around a little while and see if the view got any better. Luckily, the longer we waited, the more the clouds dissipated until there was only a thin strip remaining, giving us a pretty good view of the volcano (especially considering that we couldn’t see any of it yesterday). Definitely worth the wait!

It was about an hour before sunset, which was the perfect time to be there! The observatory was closed, and the crowds were gone. We were 2 of maybe 6 people there appreciating the volcano. With no chatty tourists around, it was eerily quiet and serene looking out at the sheer magnitude of the remaining mountain and vast valley below with its lava flow trenches.

The initial view

The clouds start clearing

The money shot!

Close-Up

Looking at the leftover crater and lava dome inside encircled by a glacier, it was interesting to imagine what the mountain and surrounding forests looked like before the volcano erupted. It was also fascinating to look at the missing wall on the volcano and imagine the lava flowing down the valley creating the current grooves in the landscape. Also, looking at the fallen trees in the area, you gained an appreciation for the force of the blast from the eruption and how powerful it must have been.

Day 56 (7/26/14): Portland, OR

For our last day in Portland, we started off at the Portland Farmers Market in downtown at Portland State University. First of all, downtown Portland is great! Plus, we only had to circle around once to find nearby street parking. As we entered the market, we enjoyed live music, the aroma of various foods being cooked and the colorful display of fresh produce. I love farmers markets, people coming together to sell items they’ve grown or made with their local community supporting them. After perusing all of the vendors tents and their goods, we decided on an egg sandwich with bacon from Bingo! Sandwiches for a late breakfast. Good choice! We enjoyed the combination of thick bacon and pickled jalapenos (extremely messy but worth it).

After exploring more of the downtown area, we checked out the suburb of Beaverton, OR just 7 miles west of downtown Portland. We drove by Nike headquarters and through some neighborhoods. Again we were surprised at the amount of traffic! I think perhaps Portland doesn’t have the transportation infrastructure to support the growth they’ve experienced over the years. Unfortunately, traffic could be a deal-breaker for us when it comes to Portland.

More traffic!

We wanted to check out the diverse Alberta Street one last time before leaving Portland and ended our day there, walking up and down the funky street. It’s such a hip, edgy area with so much to offer – restaurants, bars, food trucks, live music, coffee/tea, cafes, bakeries, yoga, clothing stores, lofts, you name it, you can probably find it there. The surrounding neighborhood is older and slightly run down but still charming. Alberta Street is definitely a place to visit while in the Portland area!

For an appetizer, we grabbed some donuts from Tonalli’s Donuts and Cream (I told you I’m obsessed with donuts…haha!). The blueberry cake donut was mind-blowingly moist and delicious. It crushed all of the Voodoo Doughnuts! We then had dinner at Bunk Sandwiches, another Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives restaurant that also happened to be on Alberta Street (like Pine State Biscuits which we already tried). Justin had the Pork Belly Cubano, and I had the Roast Beef. Both were super tasty!

Bunk Sandwiches

Pork Belly Cubano

Roast Beef

For dessert, we had to get more Salt & Straw ice cream since it would be our last opportunity to have some, but the line was even longer than the time before! Luckily though we were able to skip the line by just buying pints of our favorite flavors rather than getting scoops. If you know what flavor(s) you want, that’s definitely the way to go! 🙂

Days 53-56: Oregon (Part 4) Day 53 (7/23/14): Portland, OR | Vancouver, WA It was still raining today, but I was feeling better and wasn’t going to let the rain get in my way.

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lugoisnumerouno · 6 years

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REVIEWING: The Habit

IF YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT THE HABIT OR BURGERS OR FOOD OPINIONS SKIP THIS B/C ITS HELLAAAA LONG ILL SEE YOU AT THE NEXT TIME OK BYE ~ Okay so this review of the Habit was inspired solely because I found out that if you sign up for the Habits email rewards service that you get a free char burger scan code in your inbox. So thus, with that information, this review was born. I have been registering all of my email accounts under different names and I’ve been going to different Habits every single time throughout Santa Clarita and the San Fernando Valley. I am determined to try every single char burger on the menu, which shouldn’t be too hard since they have only 4 different types of char burgers on the menu. There is the teriyaki burger, the grilled onion portabella burger, the Santa Barbara burger and the BBQ bacon burger. So without further ado here is my review of each burger, that was brought to you by my finessing abilities. March 19th 2018 The Teriyaki burger. It is only JUSTICE! to review this burger first. I love the concept of having grilled pineapple on my burger. It makes it sweet, tangy, citrusy and it adds a delicious scent to it. A lot of the times when you go buy tacos al pastor you can see that they cook the meat with grilled pineapple. This gives the meat a juicy sweet flavor that is unmatched. It is different than orange infused meats or lemon infused meats. Pineapples are a happy medium that give meat a tangy, sweet flavor. It was after calc that I decided to get this burger. I saw on Facebook that The Habit was giving away free burgers to people who signed up to their char burger email list. I pounced. If it’s free it’s for me, and I would love to try all of their burgers on their dime. So when I went to the Habit near my house I was surprised that I had to pay 33 cents because I thought I got a free burger. No honey, I got a free char burger with cheese, the basic normal one, if you want an upgrade you have to pay the difference. But that’s okay, I went to my car and grabbed 33 cents from my change compartment and ran back to get my teriyaki burger. Let me tell you it is delicious, you can’t go wrong with pineapple meats. They give you a whole circle wedge of grilled pineapple which by the way is the best and the meat is so juicy and moist. It was fully cooked and it had caramelized onions which are the WAY TO GO! Caramelized onions that are grilled to perfection soak up the juices/fat of the meat and deliver you flavor. The pickles are good but In-N-Out’s pickles are better. The mayo is a must on sandwiches and I am glad to see that it is on the teriyaki burger. Side note: vegan mayo is just as good and is tbh much healthier and is a great substitute if you want to cut out an egg product in your life. The buns on this burger were good and fresh. It was a good burger. But that teriyaki sauce was atrocious, I tried to ignore it but it was bothering me too much which is weird because the first and second time I ordered a teriyaki burger I loved the sauce. This time it felt fake and too sweet, it was too much with the pineapple, maybe if they cut the sweetness of the sauce it would be better. But as for now, the teriyaki burger from the Habit is my go to whenever I visit that joint and until next time peace out mis amigos :) March 21st 2018 The Grilled Onion Portabella Char Burger. I went to the Habit near my school and I ordered a portabella char burger. I was thinking about getting the bacon one but I felt like the portabella was a healthier option and I wanted to try their aioli sauce. The burger was just a burger. The meat though was fantastic, it was warm and juicy. It was thick. And the mushrooms were just mushrooms. I used to be obsessed and in love with grilled mushrooms and I would want them on my steak, on my burgers, in my tacos. I wanted them everywhere but now as an adult I’m not really into them. I don’t think they are disgusting but I don’t savor them as much as I used to. They are kinda bland and they only taste bomb when they are grilled or hidden in soup. But even on this grilled burger, these mushrooms were just mushrooms. Nothing special. The burger had a delicious bun that is characteristic of the Habit and their tomatoes were fresh and I like the way they cut their lettuce. Very different from In-N-Out which gives you giant wedge slices of lettuce so much so that sometimes you have to eat a part of the lettuce first before you take a bite into your burger or else your first bite is going to be 20% burger and 80% iceberg lettuce. The Habit chops up their lettuce, making it easier to eat and more organized and more appealing. I like the lettuce chopped up like that thank you very much. Now for the best part of the portobello burger: the AIOLI SAUCE. DELICIOUS AF. The only reason I would order this burger ever again would be to taste that delicious sauce. It was white with things inside of it, tbh I couldn’t get a good look at it I was too busy chomping down on my burger. I loved the sauce so much that I licked it up off the wrapper with my finger. I loved this sauce. My go to Habit burger is the Teriyaki burger and if I had to choose one burger out of the ones that I have tried so far: The Teriyaki burger or the Portobello burger, I would still choose the Teriyaki burger but hands down the Portobello has the better sauce of the two. I would order the Teriyaki and get the aioli sauce on the side. Also the very nice cashier was such a sweetheart to me, I wanted to be her friend. She let me have a free drink :) (I filled it up with half Sprite half water). So to wrap up today's trip to the Habit, the Portobello burger is Veronica approved because of the sauce. If you are indifferent about mushrooms and don’t care for aioli sauce then skip this burger but if you are curious then try this. The mushrooms were just mushrooms, they could have done them better. Maybe if they cooked the mushrooms WITH the hamburger meat and let it soak up the juices and let it become charred with the burger and maybe added something spicy it would be bomb. BOMB. run me my check @theHabit, I just gave y’all a winning idea. (Also: when I was eating my burger I ordered it “for here” and I was eating my burger and reading up on the ingredients on the Habits website and one of the employees got really close to me and I instantly shifted my phone away from them because I felt embarrassed and didn’t want the employee to see that I was checking up on them on their website….OOPS ) Btw the difference I paid was 94 cents. March 23rd 2018 The Santa Barbara Char Burger. There was a lot of anticipation and hype behind this burger. I searched up photos of this delicious looking snack online and it looked massive. The burger itself looked like a whole meal, there seemed to be a substantial amount of guac and the sourdough bread looked fresh and toasted at the same time. I took my brother out to get a burger as well, he got the regular ol’ char burger with cheese and his complaint was that there was not enough mayo and that the burger tasted better without the pickles. My sister didn’t get anything and just napped when we were there. The Santa Barbara Char burger was everything that I expected. The guac was amazing, it had chunks of avocado which I loved and it was a hefty amount of guac that was spread out evenly which I appreciated. There's nothing more annoying than pay extra for guac and getting a tiny little spoonful, this was the opposite, the Habit was generous with its guac. (Actually I’m not sure if you could call this a guac, it was just mashed up avocado chunks, it’s not the guac you would imagine with chopped tomatoes and onions etc.) The tomatoes were delicious and sweet and the lettuce was shredded and the burger came with two hamburger patties and two slices of cheese. The patties were thick and juicy, they retained their moisture and were grilled. The burger also had grilled onions, which could have been better. I feel like the Habit serves you grilled onions that they have pre grilled, so when you eat your burger your grilled onions are disappointingly cold. Anyways the SB burger comes with 2 slices of cheese and 2 patties, a good amount of avocado, lettuce, tomato, mayo, and grilled onions all on toasted sourdough bread. The sourdough bread makes this burger unique. It gave it a lighter taste to the burger and it was delicious, it was perfect. The sourdough bread is what makes this special, it also looks more like a sandwich than an actual burger. The sourdough bread is perfect on this. This was a messy burger and it was a lot so it will definitely fill you up. I had to take half of it to-go. You can add jalapeños from the bar to this and ask for the aioli sauce (on the side if you haven’t tried it before) if you want to be extra. It's a good, fulfilling burger that was definitely worth it and I would get it again. However, can it be better? Yes, yes it can be. Now is it better than the teriyaki burger? Maybe, it's definitely in that realm bc I’m in love with grilled pineapple but I love the complexity of this burger and plus its a lot more burger. However that being said I might have just found my new go to Habit char burger. :) - NONE OTHER THAN, YOU MAJESTY, VERONICA

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