#I am going to be here a while >:|

[transmasc-rose]

Ah. Ok. Hm. They did another major retcon and I'm not sure how I feel about this. (< story of Every Game after ac1)

In Brotherhood, when Desmond kills Lucy, you take control of him. He steps, very slowly, each action forced by the player, while he asks Juno (/you/himself) to stop.

In Revelations, when Desmond thinks back on killing Lucy, he says "I'm so sorry... it wasn't me.... it was that voice... Juno... she made me..." and collapses on the ground, either stuck in that memory or maybe desyncing with himself(?)

In ac3, Desmond says he DID choose to kill Lucy. Juno showed him Lucy taking the Apple to Abstergo, raising it into the sky with the satellite (a plan the Precursors had tried and failed, but the Templars don't know that), and failing, causing the world to burn. so he made the choice to kill her.

I think you COULD argue that the discrepancy between ac Revelations and ac3 was a mirror of the Apple's use in the ac2 DLC, with most marks confessing on their deathbed that they'd been the ones to choose, though a few maintained their innocence to their last breath.

But even the Apple has been wildly inconsistent. Whether it works on temptation or its Just Straight Mind Control differs! Pretty regularly! I don't think, for example, you could call Ezio's use of the apple in Brotherhood (forcing enemy forces to kill each other) or Altaïr's use of the apple in Revelations (forcing a man to kill himself) or Bloodlines (convincing a crowd to leave in a zombie-like state) to be a matter of "temptation".

The most obvious explanation is that the apple can do both/either (depending on what writer wrote that particular scene, or even maybe intentionally. Maybe) and that the scene in Brotherhood was written with the direct use in mind, until it was retconned to the temptation use in ac3.

And I don't inherently have an issue with Desmond willingly killing Lucy. If. You know. They wrote it like that. But I genuinely believe they didn't, and the plot makes LESS sense for it.

[hinamie]

together, we do the same thing again //

[zorangezest]

jaundicewave my beloved

all the artists drawing him like a cat yiu are all correct correct correct correct correct

more catwave

[egophiliac]

was this anyone else's first thought, or

[vaguely-concerned]

the more I play the more I think lucanis basically knows it's illario who betrayed him right from the beginning (he's had a year in the ossuary to think. not that many people knew where he was going. when you ask him 'did Illario know you'd be on that ship' his only answer is the hardest flattest 'yes' you ever heard). so it's not so much about figuring out who the traitor is (because that's ludicrous. we all know. immediately. they didn't really bother to hide it lmao) as about methodically closing off every single avenue of denial lucanis has clung to that whole time with as much or little gentleness as you might prefer until he has no choice but to admit it. because the moment he has to admit it, he'll have to do something -- feel something -- about it. and that's such a catastrophic event in lucanis' inner landscape (he has had TWO people in this whole entire world up until now and will do anything to hold on to them with a heartbreaking child-like desperation, even at and especially through the detriment of his own self) that he'd rather just. not. what if we quite simply. didn't. what if we just stayed here in the emptiness where we can both pretend you didn't hurt me in a way I should never forgive. I have so much practice in that with caterina already it's always worked out great for everyone so far. (press x to fucking doubt but that's trauma logic for you lol)

after everything illario did, so much of the storm of lucanis' emotions around it is 'what the FUCK did you get yourself tangled up in this time and how do I get you out of this mess safely'. what's worse: the fact that your brother murdered you, or that he put himself in horrible danger doing so and thus exposed you to the risk of losing him forever. lucanis' heart certainly has an opinion here and it's fucking unhinged (affectionate)

the themes of dissociation in lucanis' character in general makes me feel nuts. allllll these contradictory messy things he needs to cut off from each other because they can't coexist or be easily reconciled inside him. but all remain stubbornly true separately anyway and will have their due one day. love and resentment. tenderness and fear and rage. terror and longing. love and freedom don't coexist. the burned out golden child anthem is playing in the background. he was always caterina's favourite and he has to keep striving to deserve that dubious honour with every breath he takes and then, presumably, mercifully, some day he will die and be excused and can rest. and until now he's suppressed all the -- natural, healthy, protective! -- negative feelings that threaten the few attachment relationships he actually has, at the cost of ever actually having his needs for connection and safety met and leaving his core self imprisoned and compromised. and spite goes 'what. no. that's dumb fuck that' (*spite voice* I do not understand that and even if I did I would not respect it) and does not allow him to fall back into that, which I think is what saves his life, ultimately. it took being possessed by a demon for lucanis to even contemplate telling anyone he loves 'no' in any way, but hey. whatever gets you there right lol

lucanis is dealing with the freeze response allll the way down baby. and he was even before the ossuary, that just turbo powered it and brought it to a breaking point way before it could happen naturally. but something was going to break eventually no matter what, and I'm just glad that in the end, through the power of friendship and also pure spite, it doesn't have to be him

[prommytheus]

me: im not a asoryu divorce truther, but i AM an asoryu taking a break & eventual unlabeled-long-distance-situation truther. they ABSOLUTELY needed to go on different paths at the end of the game. i totally get people who rewrite them to go back home together after 2-5, but it misses the point IMO. their split is a bittersweet thing & a testament to their devotion to each other as people and friends more than it’s a toxic split and a tragedy. it’s not ryuunosuke leaving in bitter anger at kazuma’s deceit, or kazuma being idiotically self punishing. rather, it’s them mutually saying “We need to exist outside of each other for a while for our own development as people. But i would never leave you in anger. You will always be enough for me, but you also need to learn to be enough for yourself. And ultimately we will meet again at the crossroads. When we need each other the most, and we are finally ready, and we will walk our paths side by side. Unbroken, and never having been broken. And that bond is stronger than both of our deceit, violence, shyness, and ignorance combined.”

their physical split is a show of their assurance that they could never spiritually ‘fall off’ from each other. no matter what happens, they stand together in a cosmic sense. they need to be apart so that kazuma can find a self that will live past 24, and so ryuunosuke can develop the self he found in his own journey— the self that sees its value at all. basically, ryuunosuke is leaving for himself to prove that he has a self, and kazuma is staying for himself so he can learn to care about himself enough to put his struggle in the hands of the people offering to him— so he can learn to stop running. do you get me?

you, tied to a chair and actively being waterboarded: BLBLBLBLBLLBLUBUBU—

[starscream-is-my-wife]

Ik it's a bit early but I can't believe it's been almost one year since this post

Btw yeah its real

[rynli]

when Kim asks what happened to your badge (and gun) (and MC)

[storiesconsumemysoul]

Stupidly Long Incoherent Ramblings on Lanfear, Rand, and Egwene

I feel like we are only discussing the Lanfear play with Egwene and Rand as jealous vindictiveness but we are truly not giving her enough credit. Every action she's taken so far this season has strategically resulted in, once again, slowly isolating Rand from his support system. Required conditions to secure her hooks - that have been rudely slightly dislodged - back in him. And in her eyes, Egwene is pretty much the last major obstacle.

By end of S1, Rand was alone, pretty much resigned to going mad and dying in the near future, cut off from all that he has ever known and loved, and terrified of his own mind and body. Selene makes herself a place of safety, companionship, trust, but most importantly, strength. She was the second relationship he'd ever had. With an older worldly woman who still wanted him, a clueless country bumkin. As he put it perfectly, she made him feel like a man (2x4). While he is extremely vulnerable, isolated, and terrified out of his mind, she made him feel stable and capable. That is an incredibly potent connection that does not get dissolved by the reveal of who she is. Especially since all of the reasons why he was vulnerable and isolated are still factors at play. He's still the Dragon. With all that that entails.

In the backend of S2 Lanfear has to resort to explicit forceful methods and make deals and transactions because the relationship has been damaged. But after she gets to be his big savior (2x7) she now gets to go back to building their dynamic again with more subtlety. Namely, by recreating the conditions that got them together in the first place.

We start S3 with explicit acknowledgment that 1) Lanfear is invading his dreams and trying to interfere in his decisions, 2) He is not being swayed and is instead working with friends again, and most importantly, 3) He told Moiraine about it! And what does Lanfear do? Bubble of evil that kicks every member of his entire support system exactly where it hurts them most -> makes them all splinter in different directions -> makes Moiraine (and Lan) her accomplice in that act of betrayal and cruelty establishing some real mutual destruction leverage over Moiraine where Rand's trust and compliance is concerned. Even though he still chooses to not go after the sword, that's still impressive work. And of course, continuously torturing Egwene in her dreams every night since she is the last holdout staying with him.

The scene in (3x5) when Rand says that he and Egwene haven't had a moment alone to talk since Rhuidean really stood out to me since the last we saw of Egwene in (3x4), she was desperately trying to catch his eye. To connect. Of course, since it's clear that Lan and Moiraine hadn't talked either (until settling in from their travels) that tells me that there just wasn't a chance for heart to hearts on the way from Rhuidean. But Lan gets to it basically the moment there is an opportunity because babygirl came out of Rhuidean in absolute shambles and he needed to get on that ASAP. But Rand (who's doing a great job pretending he's not going through it) and Egwene can't work towards reconnecting and really processing the shitshow that is their lives together because ... oh yeah ... Egwene is slightly preoccupied by being tortured nightly by a goddamn forsaken. Lanfear actively and materially benefits from keeping Egwene strung out and preoccupied. I really don't think it's the simple petty satisfaction of it all that she's really after. And The Wise Ones, wisely, prioritize teaching Egwene how to defend herself as quickly as possible over having heart to hearts with her dubious-status-boyfriend. Which means Rand, who is totally Fine(TM) and in no urgent need of a heart to heart, once again only finds real refuge with one person.

Repeatedly triggering and retraumatizing Egwene, who is still stubbornly sticking by Rand, ensures that she continues to have a hard time with intimacy of any kind anyways. Which is in turn also somewhat triggering for Rand since his biggest fear is hurting those he loves. And Egwene tensing up, flinching away, and distancing herself from him - as much as he understands isn't actually about him - well ... still is a particularly rough experience for him too. Their bubble event was truly perfectly calibrated to severely mess both of them up. Add on to that both of their nightmares, the arches, and Rhidean? Yeah. So, naturally, the distance between them grows and grows because Lanfear is pushing all the right buttons at such a crucially vulnerable time for both of them. Egwene needs her own refuge in order to protect herself from even more trauma, and Rand finds relief in the only familiar place of comfort still being eagerly (against his will) offered to him.

And it is so important that he finds his refuge in dreams instead of clandestine real world meetings. For one, it allows him legitimate deniability. He's not like ... seeking her out and he doesn't have control of this space so ... you know? Is it so wrong to soak in whatever comfort he can from the continued invasion of his mind by a near all-powerful being? And I really don't want this to be misconstrued as "oh he secretly wanted it so Lanfear is doing nothing wrong there actually" type of argument. What I'm trying to get at is this: making your target feel complicit in their own abuse because you put them in a position to "enjoy" some part of it is very much so an abuser tactic (the cult dude ritualistically performing oral sex on his victims as part of their initiation into his inner circle comes to mind).

Two, his dreams without her are nightmares where he commits his worst fears. And taking the alternative of having a nice little chat with his ex(?) in their "love cabin of simpler times" sure is a no brainer. The waking world and his dreams are terrifying and painful, but Lanfear can give him refuge in a safe little warm bubble. All for the cheap cheap price of indulging her advances a little. Three, seeing Lanfear in Rhuidean reinforced a thing we have seen him kind of realize but not really confront. Which is that Lanfear (and Ishamael) have a real meaningful connection with some version of him. And he can say all he likes that he's not Lews Therin but it doesn't make the grain of truth there go away (I often think about the strange lovely tenderness he shows Ishamael in his last moments). But like ... the hell is he meant to make of all that anyways? Nothing realistically. Except when he's in this strange liminal "unreal" space ... who can blame him for trying to feel out the shape of that connection?

And four, in controlling the setting of his dreams, Lanfear gets to naturally invoke Selene and all the ways Selene made him feel, all the warm fuzzy feelings associated with that place, and time, and lover. Even while he actively distrusts Lanfear. It's why her "there is a way for me to escape the dark one ... oh what am I saying let me dramatically dip real quick" thing is so effective. She's sitting on their bed, in the warm glow of their cabin, vulnerable and allowing him the opportunity to step into the role of a stable and safe version of himself. The opportunity to be in a place of safety and strength again for his own sake AND be a place of safety and strength for her. Again, that quote about making him feel like a man is so important, especially when he's vulnerable and so terrified of himself. So when he meets Mierin, of course he's going to latch on to her goodness. It's everything he saw in Selene. And everything Lanfear had been subtly priming him into keeping at the forefront of his mind and heart throughout their interactions. She has slowly but surely positioned herself back where Selene was. As a place of respite, comfort, and strength. Of course, of course, he would be tempted by the idea that that version of her can be saved. Can be made real again.

Now the real risk with her shenanigans in (3x5) is that, surely, Egwene is going to tell him that Lanfear has been the one hurting her this whole time. Which could be a massive blow that ruins the fruits of all her work. But I think Lanfear is taking that calculated risk now because she feels secure in her position. Secure enough to forcefully sever the connection between him and the last person in his support system close enough for him to seek in them what he found in Selene. She's betting on his anger being mitigated by growing more desperate for comfort when isolated fully again.

I don't know if this play is gonna work out for her the way she wants. But I can't deny that I respect the hustle. Truly villain-ing at the highest messiest degree.

[elsecrytt]

okay but jjk somnophilia is like

gojo "please please pleaaaaase let me put it in while you're sleeping PLEASE i swear i'll make you cum i proooomise please let's try it once pleeaaase. YOU can put it in ME whenever you want!!! any time any place anything you want in any of my holes!! wake me up with it!! it'll be soooo hot" satoru

vs

nanami "i have kink charts for both of us and they have sliding scales and notes section for each one. we can mark hard boundaries for what state of consciousness we want for ourselves or our partners, giving or receiving, what sex acts, etc. we'll set up a safe word and a safe gesture and then we can start trying things out" kento

vs

geto "sorry i fell asleep while eating you out, it will happen again. no, i won't stop eating you out when i fall unconscious. just tear me off your pussy if you don't like it" suguru

[egophiliac]

Do you have any final theories/desires for Book 7 Part 12?

(slamming fists on table) I DEMAND MORE CHE'NYA

[yukipri]

For curiosity's sake...

[gunstellations]

boop! 💙🤍

[melioristicbeast]

And I really just want- oh god oh god oh cut, cut Derek! Derek: What happened, Stiles? Stiles: Oh it's a fucking tragedy over here

Listen brad has more golden retriever energy compared to stiles’s feral cat vibes - but late 20s/early 30s stiles with the chaos, the tangents, the interactions with the rest of the staff, calling his editor all kinds of variations of his name/nicknames, derek with the sass in the edit notes - you see the vision

(screenshots from 1st ep of It's Alive with Brad Leone - an iconic opening)

[nomouthtospeakof]

hey gale. gale.

halaster? the halaster? halaster fucking blackcloak?

you not only personally know halaster blackcloak --

you chose HIM --

-- as your CAT SITTER??

[sleeplessvalley]

WHEN YOU SEE THE CHART TOMORROW, YOU'LL BE NUMBER ONE!

tumblr's gonna CRUNCH the quality of this one but I don't CARE. AFTER NEARLY TWO WEEKS ON AND OFF. IT'S DONE. I haven't put this much effort into a piece since 2021

great god grove has a goddamn CHOKEHOLD on me and I'm so!!!!!!!! I love this fucking game I needed to make a big piece about it. here's two other versions since the text and bandages cover up some stuff I worked hard on

inspekta/hector my god damn beloved. I love many characters from the game but this THING won't leave my head and I hope he never does