#I am so sorry this hurts my heart too | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nomoretumbler · 3 months

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just skipped to the miss power special so I could understand a lot better what people were talking about… let me tell you lives were CHANGED.

#THE TWO BRAINS MOMENTS WERE SOO GOOD #I love how he was done w her shit since moment one #that attitude is ALLL stevens #tb only broke down the moment that cheese was mentioned #but that was probably squeaky getting desperate #his scene were SO STEVEN CODED #he’s literally trying to lecture wg im not ok…………#THE MENTOR IS STILL INSIDE OF HIM #sorry for rambling abt my blorbo so much #CHUCK IS A FRICKING RESELLER I GASPED WHEN HE SAID THAT #I almost cried when wg exploded at him TT #Tobeys look when he’s getting insulted by wg :(((( his dreams were shattered right there and then #AND THE BUTCHER MAN HIS REACTION MADE MY HEART HURT #miss power only insulting the most thoughtful villians is just soo…….. :((((#also wg in her villain era let’s go #im not saying the villians deserved it…. buuuuut #im glad she got to seriously snap at least ONCE #lastly SALLY??? TEAMING UP W THE VILLAINS?????#THAT WAS SO COOL #the im here to trade wife for all this stuff. I mean trade all this stuff for my wife.. I am very nervous…..#THAT BIT MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD #ok back to two brains #I was pausing every single time he appeared on screen #his reactions were INMACULATE #I love thinking that in the prison cell he was genuinely disappointed in wg #the look he gives when mentioning her made me so sad :(((#and this fits so well into one of my headcanons that I don’t have time to explain #THE LOOKS OF PURE HATRED AND CONFUSION HE GIVES TO MISS POWER… ok I ran out of tags I talked too much #wordgirl #ramble

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cobaltfluff · 2 years

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final episode emotional wreck

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midnightwind · 11 months

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I feel like I'm 10 seconds and one bad day of insomnia from shot gunning every single Origin run of BG3 just to write down all the pet names the characters use for each other so I can stop losing my mind while writing

#I know Astarion doesn't use pet names so much as calls people catty names until he's in too deep #I don't see Shadowheart or Lae'zel as someone who uses pet names except for like maybe their SO? will have to be more gay for this one #I still only know that Halsin calls his SO his heart I am going to uselessly hang from his neck in protest over this #you gotta have pet names for people sir you're too sweet not to #does Wyll like ever not use a person's name?? I feel like his noble upbringing ruined him for such otherwise #Gale is just the dude who only uses “my friend” and other iterations isn't he #he's so milquetoast (affectionate)#and Karlach /has/ to have a million right?? but I only know Tav's (soldier) and Astarion's (Fangs)#it's almost 7am and going insane and google is useless here #also sorry Minthara you seem really cool and complex but I cannot hurt the tieflings #you are my white whale companion #this has been brought to you by me having Karlach call Halsin Papa Bear because I've lost control of this fic

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benilos · 5 months

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god i just sometimes really wish the things i created brought other ppl the same joy it brings me. i want to give something so happy for them to enjoy, i want them to feel this same wonder i do when creating. why wouldnt you want to share that feeling with other people? do u know how happy i am when i am creating? would you like to?

#i cant ever understand why i want my things to be popular #cuz when i really think about #i hate the idea of being famous #id have so much anxiety and fear of failing to perform and be what ppl want from me #but i want to popular so i can show as many ppl the things that bring me great joy?#but i dont want to be known #i want to be hidden away where i cannot be hurt #but i want to reach out and touch the world so they may feel the sunlight that i have pouring out of my heart #even if i create such dark and scary stories that have pain in them #it makes me happy #surely other people would find happiness in it too?#im still scared of hurting so im mean and like to ruin my own chances #but fucking hell i want to exist for others i want to create something that brings ideas to someones mind and makes them create too #i am sorry i am sharp i was cracked so many times #i just want to learn and grow be good to you all

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seiwas · 1 year

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i think im chained to writing soft forever 😭

#im sorry sdhbasjdf if anyone is looking for variety... i think my heart can't take it #i say soft bc i do write a bit of hurt/comfort but i feel like it's always cushioned with softness....#at least thats what the tags from other people's rbs say 😭#angst n smut r too hard #and everytime i try to write suggestive i think it somehow still ends up soft hbdhja #i am a sucKER for love !#anyway.#i guess this could be considered my writing colour ?#i talked so much again

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euphor1a · 2 years

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Best 4 hours of my life, with the loml ♡

#googie 🐰#i know i always say this but i can never really explain the way i feel about him </3 it’s so hard to put into words #i feel so complete now god i love him so much 🥺!! even that is an understatement 😔#i think it was like? 10:30 pm when i saw the weverse notif... and now it’s past 3 am jdghbcbn #i felt so many emotions throughout everything (the wv live; the ig live; and then wv live again) but god.#i’m just way too happy that i got to see him again 🥺; i missed him a lot!#crazy how just yesterday afternoon i teared up watching a reel on ig about missing him </3 and then 6 hours later!!! he shows up 💖#lol and i had so many mini breakdowns bc of him 😭 he’s a flirt FLIRT huh 😔✋🏼! WHAT ABOUT MY WEAK LITTLE HEART SIR???#i really have no defence when it comes to jk </33... sigh. but he sang sooooo many songs 🥰🥰#including txt! svt! nwjns! i’m one happy bitch 🤩☝🏼#what a great day to be alive honestly! just hope that he gets some rest bc goddamn it’s nearly 7 am at sk now 💀#oh and!!!! WE GOT TO SEE BAM MY BABY AFTER SO LONG IM SQUEALING THEY ARE SO CUTE OMG #HOW DID I ALMOST FORGET TO MENTION THAT LIKE WHAT #it was such a bonus to see tae too 🤭#!!! i’m just really happy #i’ll add more tags later... i just want to fall asleep now bc my eyes literally can’t anymore lol #anyway... ik i’m being very delulu here but like. sorry if it bothers you; i’m like this. 🤡#will always be jeon jungkook’s bitch <3 #bye bye ~ my eyes hurt 🙁#see you guys tomorrow and i love jungkook 😆... and y’all too <3

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dootznbootz · 7 months

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There's something so specifically infuriating when someone uses one of your experiences or your demographic in an argument, especially if said argument is about spreading hatred or is just so wrong. They "speak on behalf of the ___" to say such fucked shit.

"You're not thinking of the ___!"

"I literally am ___. You saying that adds nothing as you do not speak for me or for other ___. Shut up."

#I really really hate it. It angers me in such a specific way that just skldjf ksdl #...#vent below. idk. I'm really sorry #Mad rambles #Terfs will be like “oh think of survivors! 'MEN' can share women's spaces!” like shut the actual fuck up. SHUT UP. Shut your damn mouth #A terf is so much more dangerous than a trans person. Me. a tiny cis woman is so much more dangerous to a terf than a transperson is.#Because I will obliterate you. How dare you say you speak on MY behalf? As if I don't know what I'm fucking talking about.#as if you're “protecting me” by spewing such bullshit? by treating someone as a danger when they're not?!#Especially when they believe it's a fucking TRUMP CARD. Like mentioning it means they're right!!! when obviously they're not!!!#Or when they think the fact that I'm cis will make me agree with them! I'm cis simply because I am. I'm not better or worse because of it #being cis doesn't mean I'm fine with bullshit though!#I really hate feeling almost as if like...idk I'm “known” for talking about this but it's just so so infuriating. people will act like they #know when they don't. Obviously every experience is different and terfs who are survivors I hope you find peace and my heart goes out to yo #but you also need to get your fucking head outta your ass. Saying such things isn't the way to heal and you're hurting others with it.#It's NOT about hating men or trans people! the “men are always violent/women are always victims” mentality needs to fuck off #as if it's just the script of life and that it's inescapable no matter what. that it's the truth even if circumstances say otherwise.#...I'm going to possibly block the epic tag for a bit. I have the name of the saga blocked but like... It's just genuinely upsetting.#my story got picked apart too on how it wasn't actually that bad. that I'm actually the fucking worst. “Men are just like that sweetie”#BULLSHIT!!! Gender doesn't dictate a person's morals. Being good and kind does. It doesn't matter what form that takes!#not even saying HE'S good and kind as he's horrible and wonderful at the same time but about this stuff? Do what you want but #I DO think you're insane if you see it as otherwise and it makes me wanna lock my door. You're not a bad person probably but also 🙃#I get that there's history but there's also the fucking TEXT.#I don't know. I'm really sorry #tw trauma #tw sa mention #I'm not necessarily against reblogging this (I don't care) but don't post with tags. please

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pepprs · 1 year

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prefacing this by saying im fine and its whatever and im mostly numb to it. but it kinda fucking sucks that being gaslit about my own sexuality leads to… doubting my own sexuality lol!

#purrs #just went to my first ever lavender graduation ceremony and had a convo w my dad after that touched on the EXACT horrors lol like i need to #learn to not bring this shit up around my parents bc they’re just gonna say the same things. and also it doesn’t matter bc idc about labels #and (to quote ricky) it’s a conversation not a constant. but like fucking hell. just bc ive never ‘’’’’’been with anybody’’’’’’ doesn’t #mean that i can’t know im not straight. the HORRIFIC psychic damage that did to me 5 years ago this month. the way i can’t think about #sexuality or being part of the lgbtq community since and like before then when that happened i thought i was a lesbian and was gonna try to #get involved with the school lgbtq student union . like it’s so ficking stupid and sad. and i can’t trust myself anymore i can’t tell if #anything ive ever felt for anyone is actually real bc according to my (straight and biphobic) parents ‘crushes don’t count’ and i haven’t #even had a crush in months anyway and yeah ive never ‘been with’ anybody. but like god damn. you DO NOT get to tell me i have to call myself #questioning. yeah im questioning but only i can call it that and only if i want to. i get to know me. i get to call me what i am. which also #means i get to work through the years of psychic damage this thread of conversation coming from my own parents has done to me #but i own that. i want to own that. ive had the feelings i have had. maybe they were wrong and misplaced and maybe there are other ways to #interpret them like me jus t having projection issues and whatever. but they were real to me and are real to me and shape how i show up #every single day. i get to know myself. i get to call myself what i am. even though you’re my parents you don’t get to tell me that. and you #should be sorry for how fucked in the head this has made me and how cut off i have become from other people who have felt what i have felt #and from the parts of myself that felt and hurt and loved. like lolllll. i was in a good mood and then that happened and now my heart hurts.#delete later #like i don’t talk abt this shit anymore for a reason 🤪✌️ i am not involved in lgbtq groups or communities online or offline for a reason 🤪✌️#and it’s yet another manifestation of impostor syndrome too like. ppl wonder why im like this…. there is a very good reason 💖

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mogoce-nocoj · 11 months

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mx anonymous author i want to marry you please please please

#notes app vs joker out will be the death of me #hhhngh i love complex narratives I love symbolism I love a text so dense that 3k words make you head hurt I love reading between the lines #give me things that only make sense when you read them closely because it's so much always too much more and more #sorry new breathtaking bokris fic dropped and my english lit graduate heart is singing #were you ever really the one to afford fate?#I am gonna latch onto this for the rest of the day huh

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vanillabat99 · 1 year

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I've been trying a "nightmare rescripting" exercise my therapist wrote out for me, and I'm not sure if it's been helping much. It's hard to follow the instructions without getting stressed out due to The Horrors invading my pleasant imagery ._. I've had a couple bad nightmares and a couple normal nights this week, so it's not much different than usual.

I will stick with it for another week and see if there's any changes, but I'm losing hope. I don't really have any ideas on what else we could try. Maybe this is just something I have to accept ._.

#ive been sleeping in a call with my partner lately and it helps to know that someone is there.#i had a really bad one the other day that made me feel so gross ._.#im not so afraid i cant sleep but i am apprehensive about going to sleep.#im worried i will have another one and i really really dont want to experience that. theres only so much srcubbing i can do.#sidenote: my heart has been acting up more lately and its bothering me a bit ._. i still havent been able to see a decent cardiologist.#also my insurance lapsed so i have to pay for my therapy and my medications :( idk if im gonna get back on insurance or not.#sorry for being negative. it is 4:30am and i cant sleep. its too hot. and my head hurts. ._.#batty blogging #text

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sugared-violets · 2 years

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who needs surgeons when you can just reread the book that defined your adolescence and get your heart ripped out for free

#i didn't get through a whole chapter before i started crying #this is about the dusk gate chronicles which nobody on the face of the planet has ever heard of lol #it's just. these books meant EVERYTHING to me #i've never connected so deeply with any other protagonist. like there are others i LIKE more but this is different #quinn (the protag) just feels... idk like the same as me. almost every decision she makes is the one i would make and our flaws are the same #the love interest reminded me so much of the real boy i was in love with too and that kills me now #the core philosophy of the book literally held our stupid dysfunctional relationship together a couple times #but even now that i'm out and regret ever knowing him the philosophy still means so much to me just in a different way #the rose garden i was trying so hard to cultivate and grow and protect turned out to be nothing but thorns #and the dandelions i used to root out are the happiness i needed all along. yes they're easier but it's easy now because it's right and good #and now it hurts bc these books brought me so much joy but now its stained with associations to someone who hurt me carelessly #in a character that made me want to fall in love #for fucks sake he has the same NAME even. Will this and Will that i can't take it!!!#god. maybe i could find a way to read kindle books in my browser so i can use a deadname replacer on him lol #rename him something that won't break my heart every damn time i read it #anyway. sorry for this i am very sad #dani.txt

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angelicichor · 1 year

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One thing about me I'm insane and it's a problem to everyone

#virgo talks #lmao #cuts everyone out of my life because the noise in my head became too loud and I feel bad for keeping them in when they get nothing from me!#genuinely sorry bout that but uh #what's done is done #though if they reach back out I'll let them back in but I am!! Constantly afraid of existing in other people's spheres!!!#Yay : )#People who loved me the most have all turned their backs on me and now I live with a perpetual fear of creating close bonds #because exposing my heart means leaving it open for new bleeding wounds!#And I'm a machine made for love so you can probably understand how that mindset goes against my very programming but alas!!#Pain is hurt and hurt leads to solitude which leads to lonelines if left to fester for too long!#I'm ok btw just felt a bit silly lmao

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imabitofa · 1 year

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Do you have any tumblr crushes? And if so who? So we can check them out 😍

@ohmyfucinggodd

#But I can't separate tumblr and real life so my heart hurt too much so lol I am sorry ily #His face makes my eyes happy

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airenyah · 2 years

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one thing about thai dramas that really botheres me that they'll all use the same (royalty free? i assume?) music. or maybe they all have the same go-to website for music idk

anyway, it's a Problem bc i have such a strong emotional reaction to music that has been on theory of love and so when other series use that music i just. cannot™ deal

#LOOKING AT YOU @THE ECLIPSE #YOU DID IT TO ME TWICE AND I HATE YOU FOR IT #tbh it happens with bad buddy music too i also have a strong emotional reaction to that #but like. even in bbs there are a bunch of scenes that i have to mute on every rewatch bc i just Can't #bc it's tol music in my heart #anyway yeah music that has been on tol and on bbs should be illegal to be used by other dramas ever #(CUTIE PIE USED MUSIC FROM BBS EP5 PT4 AND IT NEARLY KILLED ME LIKE. THAT'S ILLEGAL™ THANK YOU VERY MUCH)#oh god tomorrow i'm gonna be watching the eclipse finale with my mom #and i'm gonna have to sit through the tol music and be normal about it #well. somewhat normal. i can be a little bit insane about it. bc at least my mom Knows™#better than anyone actually since she also got to witness me living through the plot of tol for two years #so she knows what tol means™ to me and that i am very much not normal about it. she knows.#at least no one else in my real life watches thai drama where i'd ACTUALLY have to be normal if i was watching it with them lmao #ok i'm done sorry that needed out my heart is still racing a little from hearing tol music #god that caught me so much by surprise it actually hurt #airenyah plappert #adrm

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dirt-str1der · 1 year

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You know i was thinking kiryu getting introduced to the wii would immediately throw it as hard as he can at the tv screen but actually he would wear the strap because the instructions said to do so and then when hes doing bowling hes playing for a while until he suddenly crushes it in his hand because he got too focused and clenched his fist

#Yakuza loveblog #kiryu wears the strap its strap on time he says he puts on the strap he wears the strap hear me listen to me he wears the strap #i was olaying hylics too just now but i got too scared because of the maze portion #like ahh no no no no no. theres monsters too. and its two am naoayghhhh #i believe in my heart kiryu just smashes things in his hands. like anything from controllers to eggs to lighters. like he could be holding #a can of coffee and he starts to get lost in his thiughts and he looks down and his chest is covered in leaked coffee and the can is #slicing his hand like i think he should have dinner with tachibana and hes swilling his wine fancy style and tachibana says something that #pisses him off and he just cracks the stem of the glass between his fingers. like sometimes he might not even be angry he just squeezes his #fist and somethimg gets destroyed just like hiw my hands unclench randomly his hands will clench up randomly like holding harukas hand and #she goes Ouch !!! and hes like (snoaped out of his thiughts) whuh- oh im sorry haruka. and shes like that hurt ...#dont worry she will live. but also i love the idea of kiryu shattering a lighter in his hand because he was looking at the clouds trying to #determine if it will rain. thats why he needs expensive metal ones but he keeps losing them so he buys the chesp plastic ones. he has the #hardest life ever. ihey how good do you think kiryu is at making bread i bet he can knewd some crazy dough with his grip strength i think #he would be happier baking befause theres a lot of downtime involved he can just put it in the oven and reread the instructions while its #baking ... plus i think he would look sweet with flour on his hands and cheeks ... kissing him hee hee ....#same thing with his jaw he climbs up a ladder with a lightbulb in his mouth and then he just hites down and shatters the butt end #i think it would be nice to wstch him spit glass and his poor lips are all cut up .... what a handsome young man would love to see him #crying in frustrtion because this is the seventh time its happened this month and he wishes his body woildnt spasm randomly

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the-kipsabian · 1 year

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i genuinely dont deserve the kind of kindness people show to me

#im not posting this so you can debate it. im just saying #as the person i am and the way i feel i know at times im allowed to feel loved and im worthy of love but...#at times im. i dont know what people see in me. how im worthy of any words of good or happy that i get from them #im incapable of so many things. im so flawed its so hard to hide and while i feel like i have a lot to give im also so selfish and stupid #and yet people are. so kind. too kind to me. i dont deserve any of you with me being me. i dont deserve this kind of love #thats just. the truth i feel in my heart. yeah it hurts but. you deserve someone so much better than me tho #someone actually equally amazing as you to love you back like you do #im sorry i need to lay down. i'll see you tomorrow when i have blorbo content to heal my brain again #night is an absolute mess on main

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