#I appreciate the enthusiasm <3

[olympiansally]

EXCUSE ME??? YOU CAN'T JUST DROP THAT IN THE TAGS??? Im gonna need some Mikami/Beyond food-for-thought ramblings ASAP. Indoctrinate me into this cult, please and thank you <3

I laughed so much when I saw these, I show one inch of unraveling and yall pounce lmao You guys really want me to be the messiah huh? Just want me to let out the crazy! I guess everyone can blame you two for what is about to be unleashed then!! LMAO

Also, @seventhfracture my beloved it is hilarious that you chose to word this like that because one of the main things that plague my brain for Beyond and Mikami is an actual Cult leaders AU so like yes lets start the indoctrination, sure :’)

But alright alright here goes the rambling, because I make no promises of this being super coherent, but!

Beyond and Mikami have the most unhinged ship potential because they are exactly what the other wants, but in the worst way possible. I’m talking toxic levels of encouraging each other’s worst impulses, I’m talking “whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same”, but the thing the souls are made of is arsenic.

To me they are a twisted funhouse lawlight, but worse. Except, being worse is what lets them actually make it work because their thing isn’t competing, it’s encouraging.

Lawlight is all about I’m the only one who can stop them, I’m the only one who can keep up while Beyond and Mikami would be something more yes, yes kill them all, burn everything to the ground baby.

I will admit that I first started thinking about them in the silliest way. My brain just connected the dots between Beyond Birthday “I have never even been submissive to a traffic signal” and Teru Mikami “Kira’s most obediently submissive little worshiper” Mikami and I was was like oh, oh they would fuck so nasty!

And tbh I haven’t been able to stop thinking about them ever since lmao

And then, the more I though about it, the more I realized the dynamic between them would also be all kinds of interesting in ways other than just the kinky sex - which tbh, already makes the ship quite compelling in my book lmao. But the contrast in their personalities! The way they can give each other exactly what they want, but fully ruin one another in the process!!

To put it simply, Beyond has always wanted to be special and Mikami wants someone to worship. Now put them together? Nasty horrible codependence :’)

Growing up the way he did - Wammy’s, L, being the backup - Beyond has always been second best, has always craved being seen and valued. He has an arrogant sort of confidence that is a clear front for his feelings of not being good enough, not being worthy. And yet, he is the most unhinged, the most fearless, the most willing to do whatever it takes to get what he wants - even in the midst of so many ruthless death note characters.

Similarly, Mikami doesn’t fear societal judgement. He thinks everyone else is wrong and he is the only wholesome righteous person alive, he thrives in not quite belonging because it allows him to twist himself into a “good man” martyr in his own mind - so much so that seeing someone acting in accordance to his own beliefs made him immediately assume that must be a God, because if he is heaven’s most perfect little angel, then whoever agrees with him while having more power to act on it must be a God. And yet! Mikami is just desperate to belong to someone, to make someone happy and in doing so, become someone valuable.

In a way, it’s all about their individual abandonment issues and lack of belonging and the way those experiences shaped them into people who find a wicked sort of comfort in their otherness.

In a way, that’s just like lawlight - except L and Light try to be justice, they try to do some good. But Beyond and Mikami don’t really care about what anyone’s perception of “good” is. Beyond doesn’t much care for good, unless it’s defined by someone he’s trying to impress and Mikami doesn’t think anyone but him truly understands what’s good (until of course he meets Light, but that’s not where we’re going with this). And that? The matching disregard for societal morality combined with the potential for codependency? It makes them a perfect template for absolutely deranged villains if ever put together!

And yes, Mikami’s whole strict orderly and organized way to go about things would probably clash with Beyond’s messier impulses at first. But that’s where their contrast becomes most interesting, because who better than crazy crazy Beyond Birthday to unravel Mikami’s uptightness? Who better to guide him into letting go? And Beyond’s single minded type of fearless focus given direction? Put under the guidance of Mikami’s certainty of a higher purpose? Beyond could take the shape of a chaotic vengeful God in Mikami’s eyes - as cruel and punishing as Mikami always dreamed consequences should be.

Meanwhile, Beyond - always second best to L, never good enough growing up, Backup - would revel in the worship, in being valued and it would likely push him to lean further into the whole thing - kill more, punish more, make it crueler. Not because that was his initial intention, but because he was raised to follow the instructions of someone he was meant to please and well, if falling in love means that person becomes Mikami rather than Watari, then too bad for the “criminals” of the world.

I think the fact that they feed each other’s desperation could be so… feral? I mean, Mikami is shown to thrive on scraps of affection - again, see Light - and Beyond has the potential for the type of cruelty - a byproduct of growing up at Wammy’s that L also displays, see Misa being tortured for example - that would make Mikami elevate him into the highest of pedestals, make him into that fearless God delivering divine punishment. He doesn’t share any of Light’s restraints due to trying to follow his dad’s moral code. Mikami is shown in canon to be even less forgiven than Light towards criminals, Beyond is supposed to be even less concerned about the greater good than L. Together? An absolute reign of terror! And the worship? The devotion?? That would probably be addictive to Beyond’s attention starved crazy, which means he’d lean into it and probably start performing right into Mikami’s belief system in order to reaffirm his godhood.

In a way, it’d be a vicious cycle of starved for affection, their very own lovesick ouroboros: Beyond delivers the punishing wrath Mikami has always hoped for and the fact that it’s being delivered by his own personal God reaffirms to Mikami that he is righteous, that he is special. The more Beyond confirms Mikami’s beliefs, the more Mikami is willing to worship, which in turn confirms to Beyond that he is doing the right thing and therefore should keep doing it, which makes Mikami love him more and so on and so forth.

If Mikami wants him to kill then it’s the right thing to do, if Beyond kills then it’s the right thing for Mikami to want - a never ending cycle. It’s the opposing force to lawlight’s combative friction, a downwards spiral in which the more they do, the more they are encouraged to do.

Anyway! I’m gonna cut myself off here before I get too carried away because once I get really started about them there’s so much lmao

But I will say that my favorite way to ponder their dynamic is as a twisted reflection of lawlight. I fully believe Beyond-wannabe-L-Birthday and Teru-wannabe-Light-Mikami would have thrown out the yearning immediately upon meeting and jumped straight into horribly entertaining codependency. My absolute favorite though? Lawlight investigating the shinigami eyed boyfriends. I mean the fun mirror versions interacting with each other while the twisted relationships unfold? Idk man drives me insane tbh

So yeah! This feels like more than enough for now, even though yes I could probably talk about them forever lmao

Thank you for indulging me my beloveds, it was fun :)

[theartingace]

Did you ever finish that centaur compendium booklet you mentioned a while back?

Not yet unfortunately 😔 it is still technically in progress and it is a life goal at this point to finish it, but i got taken hard by the SAD this year and have been dealing with major work-related burnout so it's been an ongoing negotiation with me @ me wanting to put it together and also life being a knock down drag out recently.

Rest assured as i get back to putting things together it will be my pinned post here!

[mack-anthology-mp3]

CAN YOU DROP THE LYRICS FOR DON’T OMFG

oh yeah i was going to i forgot about that hehe

here they are!! under the cut

If you could start this over, what would you not do again?

I’ll be standing in the doorway, waiting for my only friends

deepest heartache, deepest headache, tie black ribbons ‘round my eyes

do not tell me how you’re feeling, cross it out one thick black line

I don’t think you’re mine

I won’t tell you that it’s fine

If there’s a chance there, I don’t want it

turn away another time 

If I knew how you’d react I would try

showing you another side of me

you can go now but deep down

that’s not what I mean

you will stay here, haunted place inside my memories

put the walls up, draw the curtains, pretend that we can’t see

I don’t think you’re mine

I won’t tell you that it’s fine

If there’s a chance there, I don’t want it

turn away another time 

I don’t think you’ll be mine

I won’t say that it’s alright

if there’s a chance there, I won’t take it

screaming through a little lie

[en-chi-la-da]

Tbh I think the whole class should get to smooch hajime. It’s what he deserves

im imagining hajime sitting in a kissing booth looking like lucy from peanuts in her psychiatrist booth. kisses are 5 cents. the hajime is IN.

[lacunafiction]

Today!!! 😁😁😁

Hi @theinecksplicable,

Yes, today is the day! 💚

I'm constantly refreshing everything to collect all of those links for you all to make the launch post. I'm antsy/nervous, but also really happy for my readers to continue their stories in Fernweh! 😍

[rockethorse]

Small TS2 Free Time mod request

Figured I'd put this out into the ether because it's either the kind of thing that's so simple, someone who knows what they're doing can pop it out in a few clicks, or it's totally impossible, in which case somebody who knows what they're doing can tell me so, lol.

But is there any chance someone could make it so that blogging about a hobby slowly increases social as well as fun? It always struck me as bizarre that "blog about [hobby]" and "browse the web for [hobby]" feel almost identical when a secondary motive boost seems like an obvious added benefit, since browsing is passive, while blogging means actively engaging with a hobby community.

[daily-mees]

@50c14lly4nx10u5 here is pfp-inspired mees as thankee for doing a blog spam <33

[ID: simple pen doodle of a mouse with a smile wearing the broad round hat of a splatoon character i have not identified. the rest of the mouse is coloured in that character's clothing colours too. the mouse has triangle feet, big ears, a pointy nose and little whiskers, and its ears are pointed like the character's. behind the mouse is a circle filled with a blurred non-binary flag. end ID.]

[the-ninja-legacy-whip]

Would it be too much of a spoiler to ask which em are going battle each other in book 5

Yes very much so ahaha

(I will say there’s still a Jay vs Cole because I don’t think I’ve had them fight one v one yet, and the battle could be soooo iconic)

[arthurtristankingsmen]

@spacecatsaremadeofdarkmatter I need you to understand that you are one of my favorite people right now ;x;

[liliallowed]

every once in a while a person who's blocked me comes across my dash cuz my mutuals post their post.

I wanna complement them but I caaaaaaant

[amywritesthings]

fyi just to make a blanketed statement:

i am not updating any series until the new year, all dates are tbd.

going forward i will be deleting comments / anons asking about the update schedule for silver underground, the better strategy, etc. for my own mental health. tysm!

[loveinstreams]

the way some people blog about gomens on here really sounds like the old unhinged sherlock meta posting it’s scary

[fatsmyname]

i LOVE jose & ryan, i would die for them. you draw them so AWESOME their eyes captivate me

ଘ(੭ˊ꒳​ˋ)੭✧

can we pls see more of them? 🥺🥺🥺

AWWW THANK YOU :3 I haven’t been able to draw for myself in a bit cuz of my book gig rn, but that’ll wind down soon and hopefully I can doodle some more Jose and Ryan! I’m so glad you like them :3

[icyxmischief]

DON'T SEND ME SPOILERS YET lmaoooo I'm trying to wait to watch ep 2 with my partner tomorrow (Sunday) DDDDDX <3

[goatyoat]

Hi!!!! I saw the AMAZING post with Dirk sitting on the bed, very autism, and I NEED THE DRAWING!!! Only if you're up for it ofc! I LOVE it here! Have an awesome day and stay safe ♡!

Hi! Thank you for your enthusiasm!!

I would like to get around to perhaps drawing that screenshot one day, but unfortunately I'm super swamped with coursework at the moment bc of midterms. (Though if you- or anyone, for that matter- just really really cannot live without a drawn version, my commissions are pretty much always open)

[solarisgod]

Hi hello hey howdy, we just wanna thank everyone ( once more ) so much endlessly for giving us and the Starwake System with their canons and lores a chance to interact with their muses, both canon and original, even if for some muses depending on their canon genre etc, at first it seems much of a head scratcher to interact with a character and their lore that has an entirely different energy to their own. TwT 💖✨