#I can respect a lot of aspects of it in theory and totally respect people for whom it resonated with but overall I just feel like

[radiation]

i can't get rocky horror picture show. i feel like for it to have appeal to you, it needed to have been formative media and a sexual awakening of sorts. watched it a couple years ago coming from 1. already being out of the closet for years, 2, knowing the reputation rhps has both with the transmisogyny and theater nerds. i was gonna approach it for what it was, and i hoped to at least find some appreciation as a pulp sci fi enjoyer. but what made the most disappointed in the end is that for its reputation, it was not nearly as weird or transgressive or as queer as other 70s movies i know of or have seen. i had already seen phantom of the paradise by that point so my expectations for weird rock operas were set much higher, and i expected more of the pulpiness that it promised. i can appreciate the acting, art direction, some of the music, and i can understand what it meant to people, but there are way better and more entertaining and weirder 70s movies out there. i watched it in a double feature with shock treatment and i liked shock better. if you want a better pulp sci fi sex comedy with questionable elements, watch flesh gordon (1974)

.

[saintarmand]

wait I need to hear about the Daniel Lestat parallels

in answering your question i ended up typing a lot about a lot of things... some of which i think is pretty good and some of which is messy nonsense. enticing sneak preview:

daniel and lestat's similarities

the show overall as a story about how substance abuse affects families

how daniel mirrors both louis and lestat as a husband and as a father

facts, conjecture, and lots of theories about different aspects of daniel's backstory:

how antoinette may parallel armand, madeleine, and daniel's daughter

how daniel might mirror claudia???

like lestat, daniel can be pretty arrogant. they both love to lecture. "this is just how it is, listen to me, i would know! i have so much experience and knowledge to share." classic old white man behavior. hell, they're both old bisexual white men even. like lestat, daniel doesn't think of himself as racist but is still throwing microaggressions at both louis and armand.

daniel & lestat, danlou & loustat

lestat and daniel are both judgmental of some of louis's life choices (though usually different ones) and are not shy about saying so. they both make faces at louis eating animals—daniel also just louis eating in general ofc. but WE KNOW he still secretly thinks it's sexy and is also perhaps a bit jealous when louis is drinking from a hot guy, much like lestat. (don't pick the jacked sailor louis!!! great aesthetic but NO.)

so personality-wise, daniel is a combination of both louis and lestat. (he even has some claudia in him with his quest for the truth. i bet claudia would love to be a journalist, digging up dirt on people, exposing corruption! she's already a prolific writer too. but i'm getting sidetracked.)

both loustat and danlou are fond of each other, attracted to each other, but are also constantly bickering, sometimes in all good fun and sometimes not.

we see daniel yelling at louis in the show, and he's always yelling at armand in devil's minion. like lestat, he has a lot of anger in him. i bet he could throw a punch too back in the day. and while i don't think he was abusive to his wives, we know he wasn't a good husband either. especially while he was using.

and this is where we get to the most important parallel between them: lestat's "overindulgence" in killing is analogous to substance abuse. of course drinking too much blood doesn't actually make him act the way he does, but what happens in the show is still very reminiscent of the way alcoholism and drug abuse contributes to relationship problems. the substance itself doesn't lead to abuse, but it exacerbates things.

human blood is drugs actually

in the books, lestat talks about getting drunk a lot when he was human. louis calls himself a drunk too, and in the show their relationship starts by them going out all night almost every night. then they start going out every night to drink human blood. louis feels pressured to drink in order to please lestat, but eventually he wants to cut back. lestat is angry, telling louis it's stupid, there's nothing wrong with drinking, it's pointless, it's gonna be so hard, you won't be able to do it. and of course he feels like it's an attack on his own blood drinking. louis doesn't ask lestat to quit with him, but out of respect for louis's choice, he doesn't drink around louis anymore. lestat starts having parties at the house all the time. louis is totally fine with it, he's there, it's fine, it's fun. at least until it starts to get out of hand. and then lestat's fucking around on him too. eventually louis has a big relapse, things get way out of hand, it costs him his job even, lestat's like lol welcome back! told you this would happen! so louis breaks up with him.

but whooops he comes back carrying a child. you know, in his arms! he really wants to keep the kid. lestat acquiesces. louis doesn't go back to drinking human blood, but he doesn't have to because lestat has a new drinking buddy, a 14-year-old girl! he gave her a taste and she loved it! yay! louis tries to warn her about potential consequences. he's had a lot of them. she was a consequence even, but a good one. but she likes drinking with lestat, and eventually she starts going out on her own. and it gets out of hand.

daniel is sober now, "like louis", but he had a big drug problem back in the day. louis asks him about the "best he ever had." black tar heroin is nothing compared to what lestat gave louis that first time. yeah, it's not just drinking, it's hard drugs that lestat gave his kids.

louis's family doesn't know what the hell he and lestat get up to all night but they know it's nothing good. he stopped coming over for months, even years, but one time he showed up, watched the baby for just a second, dropped him on the floor. he wasn't invited to the kids' birthday party cause they're afraid of him. he showed up late and broke the door. they cut him out entirely. are he and his... partner, the right kind of people to adopt?

one time the cops get called. they raid the house but the evidence is well hidden. mostly. they refrain on calling the child welfare league but they don't like what they see. louis and lestat lecture claudia; louis about the drugs themselves, lestat about not hiding her tracks well enough. and speaking of, are those track marks on her arms? we don't do that kind of thing in this house!

claudia tells louis he's the one who brought her into the house. enabled lestat to give her a taste. she leaves home, staying somewhere new every night. she's still using, on her own and in dangerous situations. eventually she returns home. it's safer with someone watching your back.

lestat and claudia say louis's abstaining comes off judgmental. so he starts using again too. they throw a big big party with great party favors. claudia puts something in lestat's.

in season 2 (and i'm spoiling the whole plot), claudia and louis will travel around looking for people who are into the same stuff. the ones they find are pathetic, living like trash. then they find a group having some real fun, big parties. louis's not into it, but he's into armand, who doesn't mind that he doesn't use as much. claudia will get sick of the parties but get louis to give this woman she meets a little taste like lestat did with her. but armand doesn't want claudia around. armand and louis will keep using together, meet a guy in a bar. give him a taste of the good stuff. eventually louis will want to cut back again, and armand accepts it, even helps him. but louis's not much fun anymore.

just this once, daniel is a step ahead of louis; daniel's second marriage has already fallen apart.

daniel and alice

daniel compares louis to his first wife when he tells her about her dyeing her eyebrow; she thinks she has a flaw and tried to cover it up, but daniel likes her the way she is. lestat treated louis's aversion to killing like a flaw, and louis internalized that, calling himself a botched vampire, but daniel likes that about him. louis is like alice in a way.

some wild conjecture: what if alice was an addict too? what if daniel somehow contributed to her addiction like lestat did with louis? what if alice stopped using like louis, while daniel continued like lestat? or maybe she never used any drugs, but started drinking due to strain on her marriage; a more indirect cause. and what about the kids? what if, like claudia becoming a blood drinker like her parents, daniel's kids ended up inheriting his addiction too? becoming alcoholics as teens or adults? or maybe it affected them even more directly, like one of them accidentally ingested something he left lying around, and almost died like claudia? okay, that got dark... maybe daniel avoided getting his kids directly involved, perhaps by simply not being around much, and that's one of the differences between their stories. narrative foils aren't supposed to be identical after all, just further the same themes. a parent's substance abuse affects the children, one way or another. we don't know the details, but like lestat's fledglings, daniel's kids don't talk to him anymore.

daniel proposed to alice "after he got his shit together" but we don't know when this was. we do know daniel had a daughter by 1978 (7 years before car seats are mandatory) though we don't know how old she was—probably under 6 given he was imagining her in a car seat. we can probably assume alice is the mom, and based on her commenting on this part of his memoir that he never owned a buick, we can probably assume they were together around this time, or at least in contact. we also know he used black tar heroin in 1978.

this is only like semi-canon but on his linkedin page it says he started working as a freelance investigative journalist in 1982. it could be a random date but i imagine he's "got his shit together", working real jobs. so maybe it was around this time that he and alice got married. if we're assuming the devil's minion mind wipe theory is true, it would also be very fitting if the confusion of lost memories was what drew him specifically to investigative journalism as opposed to the portrait pieces he did before that. he doesn't know what the truth is anymore, so he starts looking for it wherever he goes.

and speaking of devil's minion, if daniel was cheating on alice with armand, then he's a lot like lestat indeed. but his secret lover is so secret he himself doesn't even know about him anymore. (or maybe alice did know there was someone, and felt very gaslighted when daniel suddenly started insisting it never happened after basically admitting it before? or maybe daniel's denials just suddenly got so convincing she agreed to marry him?)

two marriages, two children?

in 1985, daniel and alice were talking past each other when she told him she was pregnant. he was like remind me again later

louis and lestat didn't have another kid together, but lestat did make another vampire: antoinette. lestat had a child! while the marriage was going badly, a few years after getting (back) together. just like our boy danny.

after "breaking up" with lestat, louis will also have a "child", madeleine. he's giving claudia a "sister" while he's dating armand.

so here's a two-part prediction: 1. alice dumped daniel before their second child was born. 2. daniel met his second wife before his second child with was born.

so like lestat turning antoinette, daniel got alice pregnant BEFORE getting dumped like lestat (pun intended).

and like louis turning madeleine, daniel's second child was born AFTER he met his (soon-to-be) second spouse.

what if, like armand, the second wife didn't like daniel spending much time with his kids? it's been known to happen. we know absolutely nothing about this second marriage but i think we'll get something in season 2. is there something daniel shares with armand as the types of husbands they make? i bet there will be

daniel's childhood?

we know where daniel is now, and a little bit about how he got here. but the thing we know absolutely nothing about is where he started.

daniel was already struggling with drug abuse by the time he met louis and armand, doing what he "had to" to get high. we know it's not really the only reason he frequented gay bars, but still. he was at a point where he was willing to play the crack whore. so what led to it? addiction doesn't come from drug use alone, and genes aren't enough either. there's always something you're struggling to cope with that leads you to drug abuse. so what was it? his sexuality could be enough, but i bet there's more to it than that.

if we're looking for lestat parallels, rape trauma works. maybe his interest in claudia's assault was personal, his flippancy a defense mechanism? certainly a possibility. but childhood trauma seems like the safest bet, doesn't it? lestat certainly had it. but i don't wanna focus on him now.

i mentioned earlier that daniel and claudia share a passion for the truth and for writing. what if he had some of her childhood too? abusive parents, parents abusing drugs or alcohol, parents fighting a lot, parents cheating on each other. pick as many as you like. maybe he was even a band aid for a shitty marriage. maybe there was a difficult divorce. maybe one of his parents had an awful new partner and said they'd dump them but never did, or got back together every time. picked someone else over him over and over again. he certainly had a lot to say about that! maybe he gets so incensed over being lied to because his parents always lied to him too. maybe his outburst wasn't about louis at all. maybe memory is the monster. maybe his parents cursed him into the darkness. lestat's did, and he cursed his own children in turn. i bet that's what happened to daniel too: they fuck you up, your mom and dad; the poison drips through; we dance on the strings of those who came before us; memory is a monster. maybe daniel became his own father too. his father or his mother or both. it's usually both, right?

this is louis's story first and foremost but parts of it are claudia and lestat and armand's too, and daniel functions as a funhouse mirror for all of them!!!

whew

in adding the chapter headings i ended up moving things around so idk how coherent this is but i fear proofreading would only result in me editing this forever and i would really like to avoid locking even more posts into the drafts vault. 😭 hopefully it coheres? thank you for reading and please let me know your thoughts!

[itsmaferart]

Twiyor parallelism #4 ··· Mutual trust

Warning: This post contains manga content

It's been a while since I continued with the Twiyor parallelism, and I feel it's a good time to pick it up again. Everything I say here is based on my point of view based on the manga content, so you are free to have a different opinion. That said, let's begin

I think a recurring theme in the fandom is the constant teasing we do from the beginning of why a spy and an assassin, the most lethal and dangerous people in their respective countries don't realize their identities? Yes, we've all laughed in Twilight's face for simply being one of the smartest men and not realizing that a normal wife shouldn't be able to knock over a cow -

oh come on, just look at the dumb face he makes.

But moving on from the jokes, I've seen so many people make their posts explaining why this happens, I feel it's a good time to give my own version:

Multiple answers:

I think for a lot of people the most obvious answer is that Spy x Family is a comedy, so a lot of the plot conflicts and resolutions don't really have to make sense. Basically any contradiction is valid, Twilight goes from being a genius to an idiot in a second to the next. In one aspect, such as espionage, deduction and plans, Twilight is intelligence, but in the face of incoherence such as his wife's monstrous strength or his daughter's manipulations, it simply seems that his brain stops working. As Sylvia herself would say: Is he a genius or an incompetent?

Another theory I've seen is that Twilight doesn't recognize a normal woman: Twilight is so used to strong women, be they spies like Sylvia or Nightfall that he doesn't distinguish the level of strength as something "strange". Twilight has not had a normal life, he lost his mother at a very young age. So he has had no interaction with everyday situations, which explains his occasional awkwardness in being a stay-at-home father and husband. So for him, Yor having colossal strength is the most normal thing.

The women he has been with during his missions surely had skills as well. Which, it is possible, given that Twilight has been everything from an agent of the armed forces, a mobster, a political figure, and so on. So it's not strange to assume he's been with women who come from dangerous backgrounds. And Yor would be the first couple with a "more everyday" life (being a city hall employee)

Personally, I think all of these answers and plots are correct, because they all work in and out of the story. Considering that the comedy of Spy x Family is so unpredictable, each plot fills in different implausible moments that occur. The characters are silly, smart, blind, deductive and have very abnormal views of what is everyday and what is not.

I support the idea that Twilight has a distorted view of the world, this is mainly due to the war, having been a soldier and then becoming a spy. He has not had a normal life, he is adapted to see the world as a spy: through intrigue, suspicion, and denial of his emotions. However, espionage has allowed him to develop exceptional social skills so that he can be liked by many people and know how to get the best out of them. Basically, Twilight's reflex is to "take advantage" of his relationships, this mental bias is so embedded in he does not hesitate for a second to take advantage of the slightest opportunity to seduce Yor —even though the strategy he applies is totally fallible. Twilight is used to the idea that relationships are "links to extract information and make his work more efficient". However, if it were so normal for Twilight for a woman to have such strength, I think she wouldn't be surprised by Yor's prowess or go to the trouble of saving ordinary people.

I think Twilight is aware that an ordinary civilian is vulnerable, and that Sylvia and Nightfall are trained combat agents. But he simply doesn't try to reason Yor's strength, since it doesn't have a solid connection to being an assassin (But I'll emphasize this in the next point). We add that Twilight is attracted to strong women: But this refers more to the emotional strength of a woman to overcome life's adversities and keep smiling. (Although I also think Yor's strength drives him crazy).

Even so

However, I think there is one reason, which seems to me to be the most important (and I think many people overlook). I am referring to the reason why Twilight personally does not suspect Yor, and her "peculiarities".

And that is…

Twilight trusts in Yor

Possibly many people feel that this is contradictory because of the times Twilight has distrusted Yor. But even knowing that, I think those moments of relapse only emphasize that Twilight trusts her, but his instincts as a spy prevent his from feeling safe with his family, so I'm going to review those moments:

Mission 2: From their first encounter, Yor showed signs that alerted Twilight to her peculiarity. For starters she could be among the first people to penetrate his guard completely, when he didn't even perceive that she entered the tent, and quickly caught Twilight's gaze. This made the spy reconsider his plans to "ask her to be his mate", worried in the face of a woman with such sharp instincts.

Paradoxically, however, Yor demonstrated a degree of naivety bordering on being "foolish" by being able to believe the most ridiculous lies Twilight could come up with. While, Twilight saw it profitable that their interest coincided as one needed a favor from the other, he seems unable to comprehend how such a naive woman could become insightful, causing a contradiction in the spy's logical mind.

Curiously, when Yor protects him with a kick, pushing the criminal away from Loid, far from reaffirming his suspicions, Twilight seemed delighted with this spontaneous act of hers. Her strength, far from being a threat to him, functioned as a defense mechanism.

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Mission 14 - Being an SSS agent: Once they move forward with the marriage, and meet Yuri Briar, who turns out to be an obvious SSS agent to him, it makes perfect sense that Twilight is suspicious and feels that Yor may actually be an agent sent to set him up. It could be that the SSS was aware of his mission, (since they are spy hunters) and sent a woman to investigate him and play the role of wife. Which would coincide with Yor's very open attitude to accepting a fake marriage, despite the strangeness around Loid Forger.. It would not be unusual if Yuri at some point revealed his identity to his sister (although he has no desire to do so) and she just pretended not to know. All this detonated in Twilight setting up his wife, with Franky's help. Although all that theatrics ended in failure when Yor proved with actions and words his innocence.

The most important thing to note in this scene is that Yor was risking her identity as an assassin, exposing herself to the SSS for her brother and her husband. The reason for her being Loid's wife was to protect herself from the SSS, but she was willing to fight two officers or the entire organization if they laid a finger on her family. If they had been real police officers, the sight of a woman assaulting a police officer or covering up for suspected spies, Yoru would surely be questioned.

Even before disguising himself as a secret policeman, Twilight hesitates about wearing a wire or not, even though he is a spy. Still, Yor didn't mind if she was confronted by SSS members. She preferred to defend her fake husband, which makes Twilight dismiss his suspicions and feel enormous remorse. It's seeing someone, risking it to protect him.

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Mission 67 Meeting Melinda Desmond: When Yor tells Loid the news that he has just met Damiand's mother, Melinda. Twilight has a few brief moments of distrust, raising the possibility that Yor is in cahoots with his target's wife. He dismisses this when he considers how illogical it would be for Yor to be telling him about their encounter, plus Anya quickly made a clarification.

Clearly, this suspicion has little basis in fact, as Yor has no idea who the Desmonds are, and has never shown any political interest. Her entire involvement with the Eden Academy has been at Loid's request, from the very beginning.

.

We also have briefer mentions like the nights Yor would come home very late with her hands full of cut and grim looks, and was reluctant to have dinner with them. Or that time after their date at the bar when Twilight thought Yor was setting him up in reverse to force him to do the skin trap. These times, though, were quickly dismissed

We can see, in each of these times, that there are patterns in Twilight's distrust: He has never had a conclusive clue that Yor is an enemy, much less a murderer. Twilight only clings to mere assumptions when Yor interacts with people dangerous to him: the Desmonds and the SSS. And leads him to believe that they are colluding with his wife to betray him (Something that surely could have happened to him in the past with his fake relationships).

Twilight's distrust of Yor stems from himself, and his greatest fear since starting the Forger family:

..."Getting attached and learning to trust other people"

Clearly, Twilight has been getting to know Yor and she has only shown him her most honest side: a sweet, maternal, tender, patient woman, with a positive, discreet vision, who puts love and family first. But she also shows him her most vulnerable side: she is shy, clumsy, unsociable, a lousy cook and very insecure.

That has caused Twilight to confide and show himself vulnerable to her on more than one occasion. For they, in part, share many insecurities, the same sense of responsibility and sacrifice. The truth is that feeling so much comfort with Yor has made him more sensitive, but it also makes him develop an unconscious fear that all that beauty is a lie, and he himself is falling. Feeling exposed to Yor, for the many times he has let his guard down with her.

Yor has been gaining Twilight's trust:

Yor and Twilight have had a strong emotional connection (whether romantic or not). It is the connection of two people who manage to fully understand each other even though their lives have been different. Twilight believes that Yor was a sex worker, in order to provide for her brother, and far from wanting to judge her, he understood that Yor has been a person who has sacrificed so many times to protect something she cares about. That Yor has the strength to overcome adversity and be able to keep smiling while thinking of another person's well-being. This sense of sacrifice makes Twilight empathize and be moved by his life, as he perfectly understands having to sacrifice yourself even if you don't get a direct thank you or reward. While Yor, she discovered someone who supports her, understands and far from playing her, praises all her actions.

This trust has grown more when they support each other in their roles as parents, or when they try to be a good partner for each other, appreciating every kind and sincere gesture they have for each other; and when they do their best not to make each other uncomfortable at any time.

Yor has really used the force to protect her family, never to abuse it (except for everything that has to do with her role as an assassin). Despite having the ability to kill those who mess with her, Yor represses her instinct and remembers not to abuse her power; and only allows herself to do so when she feels that her daughter (and most likely her husband) are in danger.

In conclusion:

I think Twilight's perception of Yor could be divided into two parts, one is influenced by his rational facet as a spy, as Agent Twilight; and the other, by the real man, (Redacted) Representing the conflict he has in learning to trust other people, and with that, learning to expose his emotions. Each of these facets coexist within the same individual and one often overshadows the other at certain times.

On the one hand, his spy side is always in conflict with Yor, looking for any crumb of suspicion. Despite having no reason to distrust Yor he always clings to excuses to prove to himself that he "should trust no one". Yor has so far proven to be the person Twilight can trust, but surely his doubts as a spy make him believe that letting his guard down in front of her puts him in danger. As that old saying goes.

"… Nothing so good, can be so true…"

And Twilight, in his facet strives to believe that that personality: sweet, kind and unconditional could turn out to be a trap. The spy seems to be afraid that Yoru might one day betray him, because he knows that deep down he is exposing himself to her. When Twilight thinks like a spy with Yor he usually fails, sabotaging himself and backing away from advancing their relationship.

However:

The real man, the boy who once existed, is learning to "trust Yor blindly" to the extent of talking about himself and his past with her. He knows that Yor and his strength are not a threat, and more than once they have managed to overshadow the spy in his head. Demonstrating his most genuine and sincere side to her. Twilight has shown that most of the time he is genuine with Yor, except for the lies about his work, but more than once he has shown that what he thinks about her is something that comes from his heart.

Twilight will be able to understand his real feelings for Yor when he can learn to trust her and perhaps some plot event will make him understand how important it is for him to have her by his side.

I think the most interesting thing is to know what Twilight's reaction will be when he gets to know Yor, in her assassin role, Thorn Princess and the importance that his feelings will have at that moment. And the reaction he may have when he gets to know the darker side of Yor's personality, who is much more confident, determined and really is a threat to her enemies.

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What is your opinion?

Here is the previous part

[anime-grimmy]

Sooo, as has been evident from me rambling so often about it, I’ve been reading a lot of Genshin fics lately (specifically Sumeru centered ones), and it is so funny to see how headcanons and AUs change between the releases of the characters. 

Ofc, this sticks out to me especially with Haikaveh cos Kaveh got released so late for showing up so early and ppl ran far with their ideas. One of the biggest theories was (and I think still kinda is) is that Alhaitham is or at least is linked to the Scarlet King bcs his eyes have the same shape as the eye portrayed in the Forbidden Knowledge cutscene.

After the quests came out where you find out about King Deshret’s and the Goddess of Flowers’ relationship, ofc ppl started to push Alhaitham and Kaveh in the respective roles, which, ngl, I totally vibe with. Even more so cos I can only image the Goddess of Flowers with Nilou’s kinda personality (since her outfit is supposed to look like the Goddess) and the thought of her reincarnation still being good hearted beyond believe, yet also a fucking idiot with anger issues is so fucking funny.

However, the theory I personally even more subscribe to, is that both Alhaitham and Kaveh, at least in an design aspect, represent the Scarlet King. I cannot by God find the one vid that talked about it, but they laid out a lot of design specifics that rly did make sense. This ofc, made me think a lot about it too.

Alhaitham could represent King Deshret’s mind and rational side, the part of him that made him a genius and good leader. As much as Alhaitham acts as if he sucks as a leader, which from a personality standpoint might be true, his abilities and critical mind say otherwise. Alhaitham is strategic and very wise for his age, but also curious and ambitious about the knowledge he seeks. He is not without fault either, as, despite him saying he acts only out of self interest, he still does act very arrogantly and above others.

Kaveh on the other hand shows King Deshret’s soul. Clever and curious in his own right, Kaveh seeks out knowledge not only to learn and understand but because his emotions drive him to reach for it. Kaveh has a bleeding heart and follows its voice more often than his mind’s, yet that makes him empathetic to people and care about them, which we know the Scarlet King was known for as well (caring for his people, that is). His emotions and self-sacrificial nature are his crux as well, though, and lead him close to his own downfall time and time again, much as it happened with King Deshret.

Both Alhaitham and Kaveh make up the body. As is evident how haywire the theories went when the Forbidden Knowledge quest came out, Alhaitham’s eyes bear a strong physical resemblance to Deshret’s supposed eyes. Not to mention, we know Deshret is often described as powerful, so I wouldn't be surprised if Alhaitham’s body build is part of that too. For Kaveh, in that one video I mentioned they said that Kaveh’s attire seems to represent some sort of royalty. Also, in a world quest, though I don’t remember which one (i think either aranara or djini) the NPC you travel with says the traveler reminds them of King Deshret, especially the golden hair, which ofc also works for Kaveh.

(Mind you, I havent dived that deeply into Deshret lore and I did zone out during the world quests often, so pls do correct me if I say sth stupid.)

So yeah, the two sides of the same coin. We already know these two have been designed as perfect mirrors to each other, in their ideologies, personalities all the way to their colour schemes, but with regarding the headcanon they’re both aspects of the Scarlet King, it’s also an interesting analogy to think it’s Deshret’s different sides clashing with each other. 

Yes, yes they’re basically the Left Brain Right Brain meme for King Deshret.

Also, as I’ve said, I’ve read my fair share of fics with the Scarlet King reincarnation, which is usually Alhaitham. I am honestly too lazy to write a whole ass fic about it, but you can bet your ass my mind has conjured up enough stuff to fill a few pages. To finally get it outta my head tho, I will just ramble here instead.

I personally don’t think that Alhaitham and Kaveh are reincarnations of Deshret, even though it’d make sense why his body and mind would be two separate entities, as he split himself to avoid spreading more Forbidden Knowledge. I see it more as the two being “blessed” with parts of his soul or something.

Ngl, the whole thing came to me during the one World Quest where you clear up the sandstorm above King Deshret’s Mausoleum and you get to this big platform on top. I dunno, it just looked so cool and it made me think of how this could have been a ritual site or something. So, perfect place for some foreign memories to invade your brain, no?

Also, you cannot tell me the Akademiya wasn’t frothing at the mouth when the Mausoleum finally became accessible. I’d assume they’d send research teams up there after the Traveler cleared the place, and it would seem logical for both Alhaitham and Kaveh to be interested in the place, their respective curiosities spurred by the fragment of Deshret inside them.

They and a small group of scholars take it upon themselves to scope the place out, and eventually end up at the top of the pyramid. Kaveh would marvel at such a grand stage so high up in the air, being able to see into the far reaches of the desert. But he also feels trepidation in his soul, though he brushes it off.

Alhaitham and him conduct their respective researches, Alhaitham jutting down any interesting runes and scripts he finds on the podium, while Kaveh sketches the many columns and the scenery behind, his mind running wild trying to understand how such impossible structures hold. But as he stands at the edge, looking out upon the empty desert with its many ruins, a thought pops into his head.

The desert should not be dead like this.

It’s then that Kaveh feels something shift inside him. Sensations rush over him, the sun beating down on him so differently than just moments ago, the air smelling not of sand and dust but of spices and flowers, the stillness of the desert filled with the distant rush of a city well lived in and people calling him yet not shouting his name.

Kaveh stumbles back to the middle of the podium, only for Alhaitham to meet him halfway. They stare at each other with wide eyes, stare at the other but seeing reflections of themselves. Kaveh bores into Alhaitham’s intense gaze, seeing the many questions and the fierce determination to solve each and everyone of them reflect in those piercing pupils of his, and thinks:

Only a gaze as steeled as mine is fit for a king.

Alhaitham roams his eyes over Kaveh, over his golden hair reflecting the sun, making it almost blinding to look at, over proud shoulders, pushed back to straighten his stance, over calloused hands, twitching in the need to create, and thinks:

Only a presence as loud and vibrant as mine can win over my people.

The spell is broken as fast as it had come when one of the scholars of their group asks for their assistance. Kaveh and Alhaitham busy themselves with helping out the rest of the research group for the remainder of the stay to not let those intrusive thoughts resurface and really just hope that it was some weird hallucination caused by the heat or dehydration or something.

Lucky them, it wasn’t.

And really, all this fancy dressing in the form of a story just to come to the one headcanon stuck in my head:  If both Alhaitham and Kaveh are the Scarlet King, and they were to inherit his memories, I believe they’d experience them differently.

Alhaitham would have tangible memories, thoughts that’d pop into his head unbridled. He’d see the tension between Desert folk and the people of the forest and think “This is not what we fought for.”. He’d run across Cyno, discuss matters of the Akademiya with him and think “As competent and loyal as ever, just as is to be expected of my General.”. He’d meet with Nahida and think “No matter the shape she takes, her wisdom remains the same.”.

Kaveh on the other hand would experience the memories with sensations. He’d witness a fight between the matra and Emerites and be transported to a battlefield, as countless shouts and clanking metal were heard while the unmistakable taste of blood sat heavy on his tongue. He’d look at scholars disassembling a Primal Construct and his hands would itch for his tools while his heart sped up in excitement, even if Kaveh knew his knowledge of such machines was limited. He’d watch Nilou dance in the Grand Bazar and almost buckle under the mix of elation, yearning and unfathomable grief that overtook him.

(it would also be funny the other way around, as in, experience the memories with the parts “missing” from them. Though Kaveh, being the overthinker he is, would have an easier time cos his head is filled all the time with thoughts anyways. Alhaitham would have a real crisis though lmao)

At the end of the day they’d come home to each other, stand face to face and stare into a mirror of themselves, all the while the edges would start to blur and it’d become increasingly difficult to know where one of them started and the other ended.

I dunno where I’d even go with this story, in all honesty. I personally don’t like the kinda fics where King Deshret actually “awakens” and either takes over or integrates into the person he wakes up as. I think I’d push a story like this more into the territory of this experience making the two learn more about themselves and each other. As in, since they both “derive from” the same person, even if they’re steadfast in their own beliefs, they’re kinda forced to actually see from the other perspective as well. While this would probably lead to even more arguments, I believe it’d also manage to blunt their edges and while they still can’t agree with each other, they understand and therefore don’t always go on the defensive with counter points at the ready. 

Tho, if both are considered King Deshret, would that count as self-cest.

[becauseimanicequeen]

My Two Cents on White Being Non

Honestly, right now I’m living for the theory that White could be Non. To me, it could make sense for three reasons:

We’ve now seen that White doesn’t show up until after Non supposedly died.

The total lack of White’s backstory from the time before he walked into Tee’s life (and not a lot of substance after he does so, either). But it doesn’t matter since his backstory is Non’s backstory.

White’s biggest fear (what he hallucinates) is boils/rashes on his skin, which could mean that he’s terrified of something happening to his appearance that will make people dislike him.

The third one needs a bit more development, so here goes…

Considering how Non has been called “greasy” since the first time we see him in the backstory from 3 years earlier, it could make sense that White (being Non) is terrified of something like that happening again. He doesn’t want to be rejected by people (whether friends or lovers) based on his physical appearance. He doesn’t want to be mocked by it anymore.

Could it be that White (not being Non) is just a vain character? Sure. But it does make sense and is a great setup if the writers wanted to turn this into a twist in the last episode.

Alternatively (and this is where I spin off into delulu land, so you may skip until the very end of this post if you don’t want enter that wonderful land with me), the boils/rashes on his skin can also be something that might expose his true identity (if he’s Non).

Now, the timeline in DFF is all over the place here and there, so I’m not really sure how long it was between Non supposedly dying and White showing up in Tee’s life. But, if Non had the time to do plastic surgery (btw, where the fuck would he get that money?) boils/rashes could be seen as a symbol for his altered face. Literally, his appearance has changed. His bone structure has changed and, as a result, his skin has changed. You can, therefore, see his hallucination as symbolic rather than literal. It’s not about the boils/rashes, it’s about the change in physical appearance.

If he didn’t have the time to do plastic surgery (and the money aspect also speaks against it, unless he had a rich sugar daddy helping him), he could literally be putting on another face with a latex mask. Now I’m no expert in these masks so I have no idea how long you can have one on before it starts to peel off or fall apart. But I do know that you can get boils/rashes from wearing them (which is solely based on watching behind-the-scenes of movies). So White’s fear might be based on having experienced those boils/rashes while wearing the mask before, and his hallucination might be that he’s afraid it will spread and expose him before he’s done what he’s here for.

Not convinced? Okay.

Here’s my last argument that White is actually Non (and this is so meta I want to cry):

Barcode and Fuaiz (the actors playing Non and White respectively) are around the same height. (This is probably the winning argument)

Bye ✌🏼

Here’s part 2.

[samasmith23]

Viewing Kamala Khan as a mutant through a queer lens

I’ve gotta say, after having read Issue #3 of Iman Vellani’s Ms. Marvel: The New Mutant miniseries yesterday, one of the elements that I’ve really grown to love about this book is how well it functions as a metaphorical coming out narrative for Kamala Khan! In addition to the previous issues showcasing Kamala struggling with the newfound pressures that being a mutant comes with, especially during a time when anti-mutant bigotry is at record levels following Orchis’ genocidal attack on Krakoa, during this issue’s dream sequence we’re introduced to the idea that Kamala’s hesitancy to accept her newfound identity as a mutant and inability to access her new powers is all due to a mental roadblock inside of Kamala’s own psyche. However, when the villains try to force Kamala to accept her mutant powers before she is ready by invading her dreams (as part of a Trojan horse to activate a psychic bomb against other mutants), Kamala refuses her “dream-self’s” offer upon realizing that only she alone can decide when she’s ready to define who she is, countering Orchis false anti-mutant narratives and defining her solely by her latent powers by proudly proclaiming, “It’s not about the powers. It never was. It’s about the why we fight. The who we fight for. My powers don’t define me! They aren’t the testament to who I am, in here! I was afraid that being a mutant meant that I was no longer anything else. But that doesn’t erase any other part of me. It just makes me more… me. Who I am — that’s up to me to decide.”

Kamala’s story has always been one about identity, self-acceptance, and intersectionality. This has been evident since her initial run by G. Willow Wilson & Sana Amanat, where Kamala was at a crossroads in regards to figuring out who she was as Pakistani-American Muslim from an immigrant family who had just obtained Inhuman powers, eventually deciding to embrace the best aspects of each part of her respective identities.

Discovering that she now also happens to be a mutant doesn’t erase those previous aspects of who Kamala is, but simply adds to them. Additionally, several X-Men stories in the past have framed the mutant allegory through a queer lens, and there’s a lot you can read into Kamala’s journey of self-acceptance as a mutant in regards to both queer theory and intersectionality. I’ve mentioned before how the recent spike in anti-mutant bigotry amongst the general public following Orchis’ attack on Krakoa Island bears a lot of real-world parallels to the recent upsurge in homophobic and transphobic legislation by Republican politicians here in the US, and Ms. Marvel: The New Mutant #3 further expands these parallels. Similar to how Queer people of color are the groups most severely affected by homophobic and transphobic legislation, Vellani effectively demonstrates how Orchis anti-mutant hate campaign significantly impacts Kamala as a woman of color who just found out that she’s also a latent mutant. Orchis’ attempt to try and play on Kamala’s fears of being rejected by her non-mutant superhero friends while framing mutants as inherently arrogant beings with god-complexes, feels eerily similar to how Republicans have recently tried to push false “groomer” conspiracy narratives in order to frame LGBTQ+ people as inherently “predatory towards children,” further isolating an already vulnerable community by falsely defining them solely through the lens of sex. But similar to how sex & sexuality does NOT entirely define a gay or trans person’s identity as an individual, mutant powers do NOT solely define the sum of Kamala’s identity either. It may be an important aspect of who she is as a person, but it is NOT representative of the whole of her identity. Just like how being a Muslim from an immigrant family is an important facet of her personhood, but it is not the sum total of her personality. People are more complex than the narrow-minded stereotypes that bigots like to falsely project onto them, and Kamal effectively demonstrates this by accepting her newfound status as a mutant as merely another facet of personhood. She’s a mutant, as well as an Inhuman, a Muslim, a woman of color, second-generation Pakistani immigrant, nerdy fan-fiction writer, and a compassionate human being who simply wants to help others in need!

From Ms. Marvel: The New Mutant #3 by Iman Vellani, Sabir Pirzada, Carlos Gómez & Adam Gorham.

[raytorosaurus]

maybe this is a 'hot take' for which i apologize but. i feel like fanart is a big aspect of this too- how different even is it to make 'rpf' of gerards stage characters as opposed to fanart of it. it's essentially only a different medium. keeping it separate from gerard (Person In Reality Who Has A Life) outside of (character he made up to have fun with) can also easily be an invitation for fans to have fun with it too. which is why a healthy relationship with it can and does bring good things. in theory i mean. ive never seen an mcr fanfic i really liked but :p

yeah i see what you mean, it's one of the reasons that the step from tumblr (or twitter) fandom to the ao3 tag feels like. quite an arbitrary place to draw the line? as if the same thoughts and behaviours are fine right up into they're intentionally put to prose - but images or even comics are okay, textposts discussing their emotions and states of mind as extrapolated from live shows or song lyrics, putting research into constructing timelines of their lives or compiling facts about them as people - even writing (sometimes quite detailed) sexually explicit posts/tags about them is common around here. i do a lot of these things too - i'm not saying they're inherently wrong or bad - but i genuinely don't see how they're any less prone to being disrespectful or invasive or comically removed from reality than a writer putting them in a situation lol. they all involve some level of assumption, scrutiny, and interpretation.

there are definitely valid arguments to make against engaging with rpf in a fandom sense! i totally respect that, and it's something i felt kind of ashamed/guilty about when i first got into mcr, so i understand the reservations. it's just that...the way i see it, i truly think those arguments just as reasonably apply to so much of what happens in any fandom involving real people. behaviours that are extremely common and far from unique to the online fan spaces of today, to the point where avoiding them is a more conscious decision than engaging in them. i respect if people do make that choice, but...that isn't any of us who are running mcr fanblogs yk? haha.

anyway yeah. i agree with you anon, i reckon most people's definition of what does and doesn't entail rpf is just a lot narrower than the reality. there's a lot of extremely beautiful, highly-skilled emotive fanart out there, for which i'm so appreciative! i 100% don't mean it as an insult when i say those often a different kind of rpf. so are the emotive posts about how much this tour means to all the guys, how happy they are, how much they love each other and how they're all friends. i'm not saying these things are untrue, i'm just saying they absolutely don't paint an unbiased holistic picture of real human beings and their genuine emotional states hahaha. neither does fanfiction. and i just think it's impossible to not realise that if you're engaging with fanfic in any kind of thoughtful way, as opposed to reblogging textposts about them on tumblr that also project a lot onto them, yk?

and okay. i also think "the bible/succession/velvet goldmine etc etc is rpf too! shakespeare wrote rpf!" is equally as reductive as "rpf is when fangirls write about band members boning each other." as always, there's just so much more nuance there. what does and doesn't make rpf is a lot more about intent, and if you're parasocially attached to these people as deeply as we all are, most of us just share that same intent. and from what i've seen (though in fairness this is the first real person fandom i've been in, and i only really talk to other adults) it tends to be the people actively engaging with fanfic who are a better at accepting how much of fandom is pure projection and assumption based on very limited information. and that acceptance is a huge part of having a healthier relationship with celebrities/bands/bandom (along with the conscious acknowledgement that these people don't owe us anything at all besides the shows we bought tickets for - least of all insight into their personal lives or private thoughts.)

like genuinely? free your minds. we're all making shit up based on the little parts we see, i think it's healthier and more fun to openly accept that. who cares what's real when we can talk about things in terms of narratives and arcs and metaphors - none of which truly exist in real life, which is infinitely complex and individual and messy. or, more precisely, who cares what's real as long as you know what isn't! and keep that stuff far far away from the real human people involved in the band.

[janesgms]

kinda random but i have asteroid tantalus at FORTY ONE DEGREES of declination???? i'm shocked lol that's so out of orb it's crazy - side note: the right term is out of bound but i have an habit of calling it out of orb including my older posts lmao. just for you to have a notion: my asteroid tantalus is conjuncting my other asteroid young with a 0° orb and my asteroid young is in the 23° degree of declination (out of orb too)

in case you don't know, declination is the measure of a planet/angle/object's latitude - apart from the flat plane we see our chart usually when it shows the normal degrees that is measuring the longitude - in this perspective is represented projected through the ecliptic equator of earth. this is a vertent of astrology that's pretty cool to analyse and it helped me a lot to fill my chart researches.

with declination, we can mainly look at the two "missing" aspects: parallel and contral-parallel, the first has the effect of a conjunction but with only the positive traits (which i presonally consider kind of a trine but a lil bit stronger specially if tight) and the latter has the same effect of an opposition but not as strong.

now about the out of bound (or out of orb like i like to say but i know is wrong 😭) part, is basically the degree of declinations of planets/angles/objects that are further from the maximal declination of the sun (23°26'), and this gives them a totally different energy that can be both good and bad. i'm gonna detail this on other post maybe... so guys, 41° is really wild lmaooo specially considering what tantalus represents. for you guys to have another notion, my boy's tantalus is in the same sign of mine really close to it but its declination is 4° 💀

anyways let's end with the praying bart because if my theory is right then the hole is way downer then i thought. actually i'm thinking of so many theories about this matter lately and i'm anxious to do so but scared of people's reactions to be honest, i just need to put my thoughts in order inside my head first and read a little more so let's be patient with myself

obs: please if you do not believe or study or whatever with declinations and anything on here, just pass ahead, i am not trying to force anything of what i believe to anyone and i am not a professional. i'm just doing it as a hobbie and because i have fun doing this, i love gathering knowledge about this and i do believe in this matter, it makes sense to me, but i totally respect who doesn't and you should respect me. and remember: many of astrology is unknown and a mystery, and it doesn't matter for how many years you've studied and read, you'll never know everything and you'll never be the absolute truth. the key to astrology is having an open mind and trying to see beyond the surface and the obvious or the stereotypes sorry for the ranting lol

[ilgaksu]

🎉 and 💔 for the fic writer asks?

from this series of fic writer asks

🎉 What leads you to consider a fic a success?

definitely engagement. i actually have several fics abandoned currently because of lack of engagement.

(the one that came to my mind immediately is the fic discussing hei xiazi's past as a sex worker in canon, which never did as well as i hoped, but also i had very limited hopes for the appeal of a fic about a cis and very masc man's relationship to female-oriented sex work. it is, however, entirely accurate to the actual sex work industry in the country he was operating in, as well as refusing to view sex work with anything but respect for a profession. do i sound bitter? i'm a little bit bitter.)

in my original writing career, engagement is less of a pressing issue to me because i have exchanged actual money or some other form of renumeration for labour. fic for me is less a handing over an item (because outside of a commission, you haven't paid for access to it and also then do not take any ownership of it or rights to it) and more of a form of communication with other fans. i want the influencer-capitalism shift of fan subculture into content creators and content consumers as two separate groups to die in a fire, actually. subcultures should not seek to mimic the dominant culture; modern fandom was created, as i've said before to a friend, by a group of women in a house talking about star trek, who had the audacity to treat each other as equals to each other and to men, when the world refused to view any of them as such. there is no such thing as "more equal than others" outside of animal farm, and especially not based on productivity.

having said that, i think if i was pretending that engagement isn't part of the reason i'm spending my limited time on earth writing two fictional and borrowed people, i would be being disingenuous. i am using it as a form of communication and communion with other people who love the thing i love, and the fic itself is a way of me expressing and processing my love, especially in a sociohistorical era where we are often far more distanced from who we want to be in community with. everyone wants their work and love to be acknowledged, and the use of their time, especially when it's on something that is viewed as a waste of it in the dominant culture; especially when it's viewed as silly and small, because current western culture denigrates love of the silly and small, especially a big love of something that cannot be made fully marketable. and so, it's hard to feel like a little kid at show and tell with your craft project, only to feel as if all the other kids are just walking by. it's why i'm always open to questions about characterisation and construction of fics/headcanons/theories, as well as writing craft; i just don't discuss the last one unless asked very often because i dislike seeming as though i need to provide a thesis defense for my creative practice to preface my work. like, what are you, my phd supervisor?

but to go on further, because it's my blog and i can elaborate if i want to, there are other aspects too. to follow the argument for engagement further, i sometimes get comments that echo that i have verbalised or represented an experience that felt personal to someone, and personal to the point of it feeling isolating. when i specialised in trauma studies, i focused a whole dissertation on caruth's theory of the unspeakable in trauma and looked it with a literary studies focus. caruth argues, to try and condense it quickly, that trauma is the experience of an unspeakable event, and, by that argument, we can surmise that only by articulating the trauma can someone begin to process that trauma. (i think a lot about what it means to live in a current culture that is trauma-obsessed and obsessed with making our trauma marketable for the algorithm to the total invasion of privacy, and yet deeply lacking in empathy to when trauma makes a person behave outside the bounds of what they consider acceptable, btw. but that's another topic for another day.)

so, for example, getting a comment saying that someone has felt seen and heard feels incredible to me. even if that's the only comment i get on that fic, it feels like this form of communication in a world that's starved us of that kind of communication, and that will make the real work and time that goes into writing feel worthwhile.

however, overall, i've moved away from as being as metrics-focused as i once was. when i began writing in heihua fandom, for example, i assumed, with absolute certainty, that nobody was reading, that nobody was interested in what i had to say, that nothing i was writing would be viewed with grace. and as a result, i felt free in a way i hadn't in previous fandoms where i was very publically involved; if i was writing alone, just for me, what would i write? and so now a great deal of is a fic a success for me is based in: do i read it back to myself and enjoy the process of that? does it feel like, if it wasn't written by me, and i wasn't worried about egocentricity, i would acknowledge that this fic was made entirely to my own tastes? am i having fun? did i love the process?

those are the questions i try to focus on now, and so now it's about 50/50 with that and actual external engagement, which is huge progress.

💔 Is there a fic of yours that broke your heart?

OH, BOY, THIS ONE'S THE BRUTAL QUESTION.

short answer: yes, there's been several, and i immediately thought of them when you asked.

longer answer in a reply that's already had a very long answer:

several fics of mine reflect claustrophobia and hopelessness i felt at that point in my personal life. i am proud of them and i am proud of myself for them, but not because i believe the purpose of pain is to make art, or that it makes personal misery worthwhile. i am proud of them because of their honesty. they break my heart in that to look at these works at the point in my life i'm at now is to feel an intense love and compassion for the version of me who wrote them. i try and avoid autobiographical readings of my work, because i think they're often used to pigeonhole marginalised creators to fit into the box of literary criticism, but i think it's important as a creator to value how you can see your own personal development outside of just skill development in your own creative work.

[holocephal1]

I posted 1,917 times in 2022

That's 1,317 more posts than 2021!

61 posts created (3%)

1,856 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@argentavis

@fandoms-of-a-random-existence

@tgirlgerard

@goths-eat-electricity

@milfcarmilla

I tagged 1,634 of my posts in 2022

Only 15% of my posts had no tags

#<3... - 223 posts

#ghosts - 216 posts

#tlt - 61 posts

#mcr - 53 posts

#&lt;3 - 42 posts

#yeah - 37 posts

#sandman - 35 posts

#im so. tlt - 34 posts

#ocean - 32 posts

#starwar - 32 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#which is made of copper and rust. you are from a war-ridden planet and the cause of your first death was a starship crash. you sing and pla

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

overthinking kitty's "she hit me!" "she can't!" "well, she wanted to!" interaction about lucy again.

i think its a really good reflection of her experiences and how she's learned to handle things tbh, because its something she says to try and make the others listen to how she's feeling. and i figure a lot of her life was not being listened to about her feelings or experiences, so she resorts to last-ditch exaggerations to try and get her point heard.

102 notes - Posted November 17, 2022

#4

im obsessed with just how much of the captain is about theatrics. because when it comes down to it, he's not... put together. like at all. the flashback we see is meant to be his Element, (and you can put this down to gay panic, or the Everything Else if you like), but he sucks at it, a bit. more than a bit, a lot. he's completely flustered, and doing completely arbitrary things, and its very clear that Havers is the competent one in that situation, especially because he gives functional orders and then is like 'go on listen to your CO.' and its something that comes through with Cap all the time. as much as he's continually reasserting his rank, he's so clearly not in charge. at all. and he's continually trying to prove the Cool and Powerful Leadership part of his identity to the other ghosts- eg. him interrupting in The Thomas Thorne Affair to basically just be like 'look how cool and functional id be if this were me'. and in insisting that he'd wear his uniform even if given the chance to do literally anything else. being The Captain is so integral to the false existence he puts up, and i'd guess he probably used it in life to hide other aspects of his reality from both himself and others, to prevent any sort of questioning. how dare they suspect their CO, and how could he possibly be 'that kind of person' when he's a well respected, high ranking officer?

157 notes - Posted September 21, 2022

#3

thinking about the fact julian died with a wedding ring on and pat didnt..

pls ignore the photo quality in favour of the amout of sad this makes me

195 notes - Posted November 9, 2022

#2

totally unfounded ghosts theory

SO . i was thinking about this image:

a little too hard. and about people saying the thing in the captain's hand might be a tissue. and the idea of cap dying at his medal ceremony has been bouncing around my brain for a while, but i THOUGHT, what if the captain died at a funeral/memorial service? it would explain why he's in uniform, and at button house (given the people stationed there) despite the war likely being over and all by the time of his death. i cannot justify this at all, because my brain isnt working enough to research it without just getting current war memorial events, but! its an idea.

222 notes - Posted September 16, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i feel like we as a fandom don't talk about pat referring to himself as 'the big bad butcher man' enough

270 notes - Posted November 5, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[beatrice000001]

Writing this as my first and last post here

Stop generalizing on people just because a minority criticizes you fav.

This is YONA’s story and it follows her journey so reading it without liking her is pointless,but it doesn’t mean we are not allowed to like other characters more.

I’ve never seen a heroine as loved as Yona. She’s praised all the times by everyone. The author loves her dearly and is always careful enough to focus on her without wasting time on others like she said in an interview in 2019, link below if you want to read it. It’s in Japanese though.

We all love her even if not in the same way (some stan her, others just like her) and we all wish for her to be happy forever *still crying like a baby for that theory I recently read about her death at the end of the story*

Despite that, her writing is weird right now and to some degree very frustrating, especially because she is so so smart and mature for basically everything except for one aspect : yes, her romance, as soon as hak is around she turns into a teenager but for any other aspect she is a mature woman and I don’t understand why. I personally find it more frustrating than cute at this point of the story

I think everyone is allowed to report this when they review a chapter. We don’t have to worship every action of hers like some want to force us to do. Constructive criticism isn’t wrong and I have reported more than once unnecessary hate but this is not the case. The romance, which used to be in my opinion one of the most beautiful despite some minor flaws, is now underdeveloped and it’s starting to become a bit irritating (kisses and confessions but they still act awkward, it feels like their pre confession era) A lot of people, shippers and not, acknowledge that it hasn’t been properly developed,the difference is that some don’t care about it so don’t talk about it while others who hold it dear are voicing their frustration and it’s totally understandable after all this time.

Also, can you please stop mentioning Hak and Soo won stans in your long public essays? Feels like when we don’t fight each other then others include us in their rants lmao. The behaviors you are reporting come from SOME of them, not everyone. Stop throwing shit on all of us. I don’t want this to become a constant war between trio stans. I know many Yona fans who are annoying af (still traumatized by those who attacked Tohru wishing her death just because she was winning a poll on Twitter lol) but still don’t generalize on all of them because that would be unfair. Some are my friends and I get to have very nice conversations with them. It’s not their fault if some are immature, same goes for us. Loud minority doesn’t mean everyone and I can assure you that in yona’s case it’s really just a minority.

The story wouldn’t be the same without Hak or Soo won and it’s perfectly understandable why some are so attached to them. They are well written characters and add depth to the story. Soo won is affected by a fatal illness and faints all the time, while Hak, who is always injured, is still wishing to sacrifice himself for the others and this is something the author hasn’t shown any interest to explore (at least now, I hope it will be brought up in the future but I doubt it, it’s portrayed as an admirable quality) so yeah, that’s why we “complain” more than you (?) yet I think you should read what we write more carefully, you’ll notice that many points we bring up (speaking of both sides, Hak and Soo won fans) are valid

Sad that their fans have to be called toxic just because of some people. Toxicity comes from all the sides : Yona, Hak, Soo won, Dragons stans, everyone. I think we should learn to respect each other more instead of constantly accusing each other.

[ffsg0jo]

HOLD AWNNN, THE ENDING OF AOT WAS GOOD THO (said with love)

LMAOOOO i love the (said with love) bit thanks bestie. im replying with a long response, but i promise i too am saying this with love !! 🥰💖

im gonna be completely honest when the manga ending first came out. i was defending isayama with my life. i didn't really like the ending, but that was my og, so i sucked it all up and tried to like it. but ive matured, and ive accepted that it wasn't the best ending in terms of actual writing.

reading the manga, it was actually so so good right up until the last chapter. all the chapters before the last one was honestly 10/10 in my opinion. would've been one of the best mangas ive read. i remember waiting months for the final chapter, and when it came out, my heart sank. i wanted to cry for all the wrong reasons.

ill list all the reasons why i didn't think it was a good ending under the cut and you can read them if you want but i just wanna say i am absolutely NOT shitting on anyone that enjoys the ending or isayama or anything. im actually really glad you like it, and it's all personal opinions/ preferences anyway.

plus he's apparently releasing chapter 140?? so we'll see what isayama does with that.

I don't hate it because Eren died or because Mikasa was the one to kill him. I actually quite liked this aspect, and it feels very fitting. The same goes with Armin and Eren's talk. I love that we got to see more of their differing views and opinions on freedom. But there's a lot of other things I disliked.

Eren for some reason, turned into a whiny baby, not wanting mikasa to move on. Like we all knew that he loved her since the very beginning and its so so obvious. But instead of showing that in a meaningful way, he's like, NOOO SHE CAN'T MOVE ON !!!!!! like bro cmon now you're grown

Reiner's character regressed last minute, and it completely ruined his development. Like, I know it's been three years, but why is he thirsting over historia and sniffing the letter she wrote. We literally saw him shove a gun in his mouth, wanting to kill himself and suffer from extreme PSTD. It feels like isayama wanted it to end on a lighter note even though his protagonist was killed. And he did it at the expense of other characters. All the love I had for reiner lowkey went away when I saw him do that.

Jean and Mikasa getting together. It's heavily implied that she never got over him and is even buried in the scarf he wrapped around her. And it doesn't sit well with me that she got with Jean, knowing he's second to a dead guy. I wouldn't have minded them being together if the circumstances were different. Mikasa healed and moved on, or her and Jean got closer and bonded over their trauma and everything they lost. But she clearly didn't move on from Eren, and I personally think Jean deserved better than that.

Annie basically getting off scot-free, and her getting with Armin. I'm not gonna explain this one too much, but out of all the traitors, she's the only one that had no/little remorse. And the fact that she got with Armin just rubs me the wrong way. I respect the hustle, but I wanted her dad to die or something she needed to suffer a little more.

Historia ends up with a man (like bffr now cmon). This one's pretty self-explanatory, but you're telling me she seriously got pregnant and settled down with a man? I read fan theories/predictions at the time that were 100000× better than what isayama did to her.

Everyone's characters just went back to their season 1 version, and I hate it. They suffered so so much went through such tragedy but came out relatively mentally unscathed? I feel like the only person who's truly suffering the effects of it, mentally and physically, was Levi. I did really like Levi's ending, though. It was tragic but fitting. And the fact that he's with Gabi as well I really liked that.

anyways like i said people have different opinions and it's totally fine if you don't agree with me !! hope you're having a wonderful day nonny and thanks for popping in <33

It wasn't a bad ending, but it wasn't a good ending either. I liked about 40% of it, but that's about it. It's been nearly 3 years since I've seen the ending, though, and this is just from memory, and I've tried to be as brief as possible.

If I revisited it, there could be more things that I like/dislike. idkk. I also haven't watched past half of season 4 part 1 of the anime, so if anything changed in the anime ending, I'm not too sure about that. i'm speaking purely from the manga ending.

[joeysayskonnichiwa]

May 06 - 浅草 (Asakusa)

For the first day, this was such an amazing experience! Essentially, we went to a huge temple in Tokyo and ended up drawing our fortune, casting away bad luck/evil spirits, praying, and more. I did my fortune and ended up getting a regular fortune, basically saying that with the help of God, I can achieve great things. However, things will not just come to me even if I work hard for it—without the push from God, none of my desires would come to fruition. I will say that the fortune did tell me things will be okay and things will come to pass, like the person I wait for will come or my experiences with employment are good. I also walked around and saw so many different types of shops! I think what surprised me the most was how cheap the food prices were compared to American food prices. I got a matcha boba drink for what would be the equivalent to less than $5 USD. If I got the same item in the United States, it would definitely be like $8. I think that today’s excursion was a totally wonderful introduction into everything, experiencing a lot of what Japan, specifically Tokyo, has to offer. I am definitely going back there at some point to finish my desired shopping!

Academic Reflection

As for the academic aspects that I learned, I will be talking about the Edo period specifically, the pre-modern era of Japan. We visited Fukagawa museum, which showed us what the surrounding area looked like back in the Edo period. After seeing how everything was structured, built, and densely populated, I can say it was an incredible experience! I had so much fun learning about different buildings and structures that provided good imagery of the experiences discussed. For example, I stopped by a building that was actually a portable restaurant, where a person would go around selling food (like noodles) by carrying the store around on their shoulder. This was such a creative way to make money—and it relates to the context of the readings provided about the Edo period, which I will discuss in a moment.

How I will relate the readings to the aspect mentioned above would be the social hierarchy of the Edo period, specifically how different groups of people operated in society. I presume the portable restaurant would have been classified as one of the townspeople, a merchant to be specific. The different hierarchies are interesting—for example, there are peasants, which accounted for a huge majority of the population according to the reading about the Edo period. They are technically ranked adjacent to the samurai, but could not use family names, bear swords, nor could they change their jobs as they were bound to whatever they did, which made them inferior. On top of that, they were differentiated from the “townspeople” part of the hierarchy which was apparently superior. However, the reading highlights that townspeople were less respected in theory, because the samurai valued peasantry more (this slightly confused me, but we got it)! Anyway, I think it was super interesting to learn about the different classes in the Edo period and see how all of that was displayed in the structures that we saw in the museum. They told so many stories without saying much or relying on the employees to give us context.

[itsmaferart]

Twiyor parallelism 1 → Garden vs WISE

(Warning: Contains manga spoiler)

In my previous post do a couple of analysis of Twilight and Yor individually, detailing individual aspects of their personality and the conflict that raises each character in their background. Now, I want to develop an analysis that will be divided into several parts, about these characters at the point where they are similar and opposite to each other, and how their dynamics develop. I clarify, that this is based on the manga and my own point of view, being my own theories of what it means - but this can change, depending on the course that follows the manga that is in issue. That being said, let's get started!

Before being immersed in Twiyor. I will start by analyzing the respective organizations to which they both belong.

One of the oldest theory within the SxF fandom is the "battle between Twilight, the spy, and Thorn princess." The theory is based on Yor, who is someday assigned to Twilight, going to meet and have an epic battle, and Anya is the one who ends up stopping them, and that will end the story. "- In short, that's what the theory is based on. And most of the fandom is only debated by who would win the two. However, I think we really need to look at the probabilities of this happening:

What is the conflict?

Of course, part of the dynamics of the plot and subplots of the chapters is that the characters do not discover their identities, with Anya being the first to interfere to prevent this from happening. Since, this could lead to the Forger family disappearing.

That's right Anya!, frogs can separate your family!

However, the Spy x Family plot consists of two conflicts. The dichotomy between peace/war and truth/lie. On the one hand, the context of the plot speaks of two countries Westalis and Ostania, which live on the verge of restarting a war conflict. Peace is only transitory, a cover built so that from the shadow people affiliated with the government of that country (or another) plan the war.

Meanwhile, the relationship of the protagonists - Forger Family - and most of the characters around them, is based on lies and truths. Each character hides their true identity, having a double life that no one but them (and Anya) knows. But, on the other hand, each character has a truth that motivates to preserve lies. Although the methods are "selfish," the purpose of each character (except for some) is noble. It is at this point that both central conflicts have an impact on each other.

Certainly, Twilight and Yor are the main ones. Both have dangerous jobs to hide from the world through lies.

Now, when we look at their work I really question if: WISE and Garden are enemies? —It is really difficult to have any concrete basis on this subject, considering that we know very little about Jardin. But I going to build on what little we have so far—

WISE vs Garden

Franky tells Twilight that they suspect an informant was killed by one of Garden's killers. Surprisingly, Twilight looks surprised and asks if these weren't just an "urban legend"? And that half of his acts are mere rumors. Franky claims that everything is real, and that they "purge" the "traitors of the fatherland." Twilight quickly assumes that every government has unofficial "paramilitaries" who handle dirty work.

Which I miss a lot, implying that Twilight/WISE is not fully aware of Garden as we thought. They know their existence, but do not look too concerned as if they were not a "direct threat to them." Twilight himself reacts very calmly.

If we are guided by the Twilight and Yor ages, we know that both organizations surely existed long before they joined. So so far there may not have been a forceful encounter between them as to consider them enemies —unlike SSS who are clear enemy of Westalis' spies. If what Franky says is totally true: It implies that Garden has its own goal, which may or may not interfere with them. These killers are also military personnel who protect an ideal, in order to protect Ostania. And perhaps, they can "be against war."

In the Twilight backstory, we discovered that smear campaigns play an important role in the war, as the people of Westalis say that Ostania started the war, and vice versa. Franky again plays the role of "informant" for the viewer. Making clear, everything is actually the fault of the rulers, and the inhabitants of both countries end up suffering the consequences.

The director mentions that "People who see war as just another way to make a buck" ...Mentioning that it is a despicable act and that his country, Ostania, does not need this "type of people."

I wouldn't know if this is a thought of his own, or if this is the aim of Garden. But, considering that Yor also yearns for a "peaceful life," I will assume that this is something Garden practices as a doctrine.

The methods of the killers in the Garden may not be ethical, but we could say that they are those who think of fighting "fire against fire." Fighting the enemy with their same methods, so there are hitmen who only manage for money, while they for seemingly noble reasons.

In the same cruise bow there is an example of how the "black market" helped feed people who lost everything to war. The shopkeeper mentions that there is a family that worked hard to make the underworld run "honorably"

There is mention of a man who took over this organization. This man looks a lot like the same man who was in the Anya and Bond experiments. Coincidence? I do not believe it

It is here that I see a little difficult for Garden to assign Thron Princess to kill Twilight, as a casual plea, similar to her other victims. If that were the case, long ago this would have happened, and surely there would be a huge reward for the spy's head. Otherwise with the SSS, if you have been looking for it for some time.

Yuri mentions "someone who doesn't look his age." —Twilight lied about his age in the army, so they must have little information about him.

My impressions are:

Honestly, I doubt that at the current point WISE and Garden are really enemies, so I doubt that there is any interest in destroying each other, so I see it as very difficult for these two organizations to have any intention of crossing. Indirectly, I think both sides want to avoid war, either to "preserve peace" or to "protect their own ideals and interests."

So I don't see an interest in sending their deadliest weapons into combat → Since their interest is not to stop espionage or internal purging forces. Both organizations strive to maintain control

The only way I see this possible is for a very catastrophic event to occur, where one side is incriminating in the eyes of the other.

However, I do not rule out the possibility of a meeting: There is a possibility that WISE will be framed or harmed in an event, that the Ostanian intelligence forces will end up blaming as part of a plan. Forcing the SSS and Garden to take action

But will Twilight and Thorn Princess really be able to fight by discovering each other? After all that has happened.... The impact that the truth can have for them can be so difficult that I really doubt that they can assimilate it

But I will leave this for the next analysis. I hope you enjoyed it!

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What is your opinion?

You can read here the next part

[sanpatron]

Anonymous asked:

so uh.... thoughts on Saints Row 2022? heard its uh.

its bad. really bad. "You butchered everything" kind of bad

I don’t wanna turn this into a full-fledged review sorta deal, but I feel like as your resident Sai/nts Row man, I should at least talk about my thoughts a little bit. Though before I get into anything, I wanna say two things.

First; despite my feelings towards the reboot, I really don’t hate it. I was super disappointed by it in a lot of areas, but I’m not like “oh my god this is the worst thing in the world, I can’t believe the developers broke into my home, kicked my dog, and then set my place on fire”. A lot of reviews have been crazy harsh and I just think that kind of attitude is tiring. But again, that’s just me.

Second; I feel like I might have to reevaluate everything given the recent announcement on how they’ll be fixing up a lot of things. For anyone curious you can learn more about it here. Not entirely sure how substantial any of the fixes are gonna be (I mean it ain’t like they can redo the story), but I guess we’ll just wait and see.

Anyway, my thoughts will be under the read more!

So to basically summarize everything, I think at the very least the gameplay is like mid to decent at best. There’s a lot of weird shit involving the combat where it doesn’t feel as good as it might have in previous entries (I’m sure we all know about gameplay feel and etc). But I don’t think it’s bad enough to make me not want to go around the map and fuck around, And once co-op has been fixed, I’m sure that’ll help substantially too.

The activities can be fun, but they don’t feel as integral to the story as they should be. They’re more like blatant padding cause the story is so weirdly short for whatever reason. Like in the first two games you didn’t even have to complete them all in their entirety to continue the main missions, just do enough to earn the Respect you need to unlock more. Not only that, but they’d let you earn Respect through other methods as well; stunts, diversions, buying stuff, etc.

The map is a step up from Steelport TREMENDOUSLY. There’s a lot more character and variety to the city, but it’s still missing a certain sort of something that made me really fall in love with Stilwater. Probably the grime? I think it might be a bit too clean in some aspects. Also if you’re gonna have a big corpo faction in the game, then you definitely need to make them feel a lot more oppressive than they’re depicted. Like ULTOR had their hands in everything compared to Marshall.

Now my biggest issues are regarding the plot and the new cast. The plot is way too short. Like ridiculously so. It feels like some basically had an outline or a draft of what they wanted the story to be, and wound up just using that while totally forgetting to beef it up. The stakes aren’t really there, we don’t have much to see when it comes to the rival gangs, the tone is frankly all over the place, and for a game that was marketed as an origin story, it really doesn’t feel like much of one. Especially for the main four because they’re already so close with each other when you start the game.

Also I don’t hate the new group entirely. Like in theory they could work out well. But the biggest problem is that I think they play it too safe with them. For a bunch of career criminals who decide to form a gang cause of really uninteresting reasons, the writers REALLY wanted to portray them as good people. And I know that’s a bit rich given what I’ve been doing with Boss here, but I always make it a point to say that he’s more than capable of starting shit whenever he feels like it. He just sees no reason to.

If you’re going to write about a gang then don’t hesitate in making them assholes! Like I’m sorry, but there is no way in hell this weird sanitized version of them is going to work out or even be remotely interesting. It feels like the misconception of what “morally grey” characters are. Honestly “sanitized” is they key word here; from the gang, to the tone, to even the violence that’s played out. All of it feels way too clean for my liking.

Anyway, I could go into further details about stuff like them trying to go for spaghetti western themes at literally the end of the game, or some gameplay choices that I don’t agree with, but like I said, I don’t want this to be a full-on review of SRR. Just wanted to get some thoughts out there.

Hope this answers your question well enough!

[queensusanthemagnificent]

It’s Gushing About Cinderella 1997 Time Again

Okay, so instead of color theory, today, I’m looking at Cinderella’s journey with trust, the Prince’s inability to recognize her at the ball, and how that aspect of the original fairytale got utilized to further along the theme of learning to trust people to love you for who you are.

Part 1: The Prince Meets Cinderella

When the prince meets Cinderella just after The Sweetest Things, there is no magic involved at all, and he’s IMMEDIATELY smitten with her. Just thinks she’s the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen and makes no bones about trying to figure out how to ask her out even after she’s excused herself to go about her day. Cinderella is visibly uncomfortable with the attention, but doesn’t completely turn him away. We know from The Sweetest Things that she WANTS love, that she yearns for it even, but the moment someone turns around and gives it to her, she doesn’t seem to know what to do with it anymore. She’s mostly confused by the prince’s behavior, but ultimately gains enough confidence and chutzpah to call him out on continuing to pester her even when she’s made it fairly clear she’s not interested by asking him if he even knows how to treat a woman.

And of course has her iconic line:

He sticks his foot in his mouth right after by saying she’s “not like most girls” which I will somewhat excuse as we know the prince has grown up massively sheltered and has likely not spoken to many women outside of the trappings of nobility who are all attempting to gain his or his parents’ favor, particularly as a suitor (we also know from a later scene that his mother has been attempting to set him up for a while and this is likely how he has met most women he’s ever interacted with).

Cinderella chooses to be forgiving and admits that she’s led a fairly sheltered life, thus how she’s gained her opinions I suppose, and the prince admits the same and they really seem to connect TOGETHER for the first time before the stepmother interrupts. Despite her choice to try to walk away from the prince when he initially showed interest in her, Cinderella risks her stepmother’s impatience and irritation by turning back one last time to watch the prince leave. She WANTS love, she WANTS to trust that someone could be interested in her like this, but she doesn’t completely trust it to happen or to last.

Part 2: The Prince sees Cinderella at the Ball

The next time the prince sees Cinderella is at the ball. He’s just spent the last several hours making nice with a bunch of women he doesn’t know and isn’t interested in so he can appease his mother. Presumably, he could probably expect the girl he met in the marketplace a few days ago might make an appearance given that the invite went out to all the girls in the kingdom, but he never mentions it. While it was clearly a nice connection to make in the moment, he seems to mostly chalk it up to a successful trip to the village, made nicer by a pretty girl and doesn’t think much about it afterwards, esp since the problem of the ball comes up immediately and his attention gets derailed.

In other words, the prince is not thinking about Cinderella anymore. Not maliciously, but he’s got other things on his mind, so when she shows up and he doesn’t recognize her despite having flirted with her only a few days ago, it’s somewhat understandable. Plus, she’s all made up with a completely different hairstyle and a nice dress and they have only met ONCE, for a few minutes total, several days ago.

But, that being said, while he doesn’t recognize her, he IS once again immediately smitten with her, and he does have that sense of familiarity, he just can’t place where. The problem then comes when he starts to try to guess how he knows her.

His guesses are all related to Cinderella being rich and/or nobility like him rather than considering that commoner girl he flirted with in the marketplace only a few days ago. Cinderella reacts fairly kindly to those guesses, telling him that she can’t swim, so she wouldn’t have been at the lake that summer, or that she’s never been to the mountains where his lodge is. But these assumptions eventually feed into Cinderella’s feelings of inadequacy and her fears that he won’t care for her when he finds out who she really is despite his initial reaction to her in the marketplace.

She starts to get flustered again when he calls her beautiful and her attention is drawn to how everyone around her is looking at them, but is effectively distracted by the Prince beginning to sing and only becomes flustered again once the King and Queen decide to insert themselves into the situation and get to know her and the reality of what seems to be happening hits her. She just intended to go to a fun party and dance a little, but now she’s gotten the attention of the Prince and it’s coming back to her that the point of the ball was for the Prince to find a WIFE. But she can tell, both from the Prince’s earlier comments and the ones made by the King and Queen asking who she is and who her family is, that they’re assuming things about her status that aren’t true.

Cinderella wants to keep living in a fantasy, though, where a Prince could love someone like her, so every time her reality comes into the conversation, she tries to move the conversation away. She wants to live in the bubble of romance the Prince is creating for her rather than talking about her family or what he wants in a wife.

And it works, right up until the clock strikes midnight and that reality crashes down on her like an avalanche.

Despite everything they’ve talked about that night, about how he knows she’s The One despite just having met her, about what he wants in a wife and how she seems to fit that description, about their feelings, Cinderella does not trust that he’s going to like her once he finds out who she is. Because despite how much time they’ve spent with each other (which, according to clock, is about 45 minutes now), he hasn’t recognized her as the girl from the marketplace ONCE.

Cinderella herself never mentions whether she recognizes the Prince from the marketplace or not, but we can fairly safely assume that she does. That moment meant a LOT to her, it was likely the first friendliness she had been shown in a while, especially by a stranger, and it hit her like a ton of bricks. It showed her that someone COULD be interested in her for who she is, could grow to love her.

And of course, meeting the Prince’s family at the ball gives her a sense of what it would be like to be part of HIS family, a family that already does seem to like her well enough and clearly care about their son. It’s everything she’s ever dreamed of having, but they all believe her to be something she isn’t, and she can’t trust that they’d treat her the same if they knew. So instead of risking it all for love, for that dream, she runs again. She’d rather leave it one really good night and a lifelong what-if than get rejected one more time.

Cinderella runs home, back to what she knows, back to what’s comfortable. In the “Do I Want You” reprise, Cinderella appears wistful, but resigned. The Prince, on the other hand, seems almost more confident and determined. He’s smiling at the empty courtyard, even before he sees the shoe left behind. Cinderella is prepared to let everything go, but the Prince no longer is. She told him at the ball is that the problem with most people is that they only dream about things without ever doing anything about it.

So he does. He commits himself to finding her, even WITHOUT the shoe, he’s committed to finding her.

Part 3: The Prince Finds Cinderella

Obviously, the fact that the Prince has the need to go out and have everyone try on the shoe means he still has no idea who Cinderella is. He never asks her name at the ball, so he hasn’t connected her to the girl from the marketplace who DID tell him her name. He can’t just go into the village and ask for “Cinderella” yet. But the fact that he goes INTO the village at all means he has recognized that this girl could be literally anyone, commoner or nobility, and it doesn’t matter to him which it is. He’s making no assumptions about her identity anymore.

And then he sees her. In an obvious throwback to their first meeting, he finds her having just dropped all of her belongings in front of a carriage because it moved in front of her a little quickly.

Backing up, though. Cinderella’s gone through an entire journey during this time period. She left the Prince behind at the ball, ready to leave that dream behind as “impossible.” And gives it one last go with the family she was left with, trying to connect with them, be a part of it. And it fails. Again.

But it gives her the strength to realize that this was never going to work. And while she doesn’t believe she can be what a Prince wants, she DOES believe she deserves to be loved and deserves better than what her stepmother is dishing out.

So, the next day, while the Prince is out with a glass slipper, going through every eligible girl in the kingdom trying to find her, Cinderella is preparing to leave her childhood home and set out on her own. Even when she ostensibly DOES hear the Prince in the house, trying on the slipper with her family, she chooses not to make herself known to him, and walks away.

But not quite fast enough and the Prince sees her.

She is once again dressed as a commoner with no magic involved, and this time, the Prince immediately recognizes her both as the woman from the marketplace AND the woman from the ball. From behind. By referencing their first meeting where he initially made his interest known, he indicates that he still likes her despite now knowing her background, and perhaps even BECAUSE he now knows her background as the first woman he ever met who truly understood how he felt and treated him like a person, with kindness and respect, rather than like a Prince.

Cinderella has a choice here. He recognizes her, yes, but she doesn’t have to play along. She doesn’t have to turn around and admit to anything, she COULD, presumably, choose to keep running. But the fact that he RECOGNIZES her, finally, and still wants her, gives her just enough courage to turn around and trust him and confirm her identity, both as the girl in the marketplace and the girl who fits the slipper.

And it pays off. Trusting someone to love you as you are, having the courage to actually go after your dream, to let it come true, pays off.

Have I mentioned how much I love this movie recently? Because this is PEAK Cinderella, and I love this movie.