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IM SCREAMING
#Jordan !!!!!#make it happen!!!!!#at the last minute you can just shove their heads together if you don’t want in#but also you can be a representative of the people and participate hahaha#wow#I can’t believe they said that lmao#and all because Rhett choked them out 🤣#sheesh#rhett and link#rhink#gmmore 2535
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how are u gonna be an atla fan but be “anti aang” mf did u watch the show lmao
#how r u gonna be a fan of a show called The Last Airbender#and then go on rant after rant abt how much u fucking HATE said airbender#like are u stupid or what#someone wasn’t paying attention to the show methinks !#can’t believe those mfs even exist#if ur an aang hater ur so fucking stupid lmao#not to get heated over a fictional 12 year old from a kids show but uhhhh ur wrong and have terrible judgement#but i digress. peace and love😍😇#atla#aang#anti aang#pro aang#iduna.txt
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No one is asking you to like cops IRL, not even the show. If you look at Arcane and what you see is copaganda, if you look at Cait and only see PoLiCe OfFiCeR and not the character, the problem is YOU.
1. I never said anyone asked me to like cops irl
2. I know that’s what I said.
#I was gonna make a long drawn out response specifying or whatever but the post is very self explanatory#idk if I see it as a#‘problem’ but like yeah that’s literally the point of the post#I already have to extend Grace sympathy and understanding to police irl being black in the south#I’m not doing it for a show I like for a character I tolerate#like the surface level analysis I do of Caitlyn has her as a well written character#I don’t care to delve any deeper than that unless it’s about how she interacts with or shapes characters I like lmao#And the characters I like are doing thing that I wish I could see more of irl#I think I made a post a while ago about how fandom as escapism for me is difficult bc the way I interact w/ media is shaped by my real life#and since fandom is majority white they just don’t get it and refuse to#this might be part of that#like idc about the redeemed bigot there’s enough of those in my spaces already#I’m sure they’re very sad and important and educational for you but I don’t care#one more time for anon I ME THATS JUST ME ALONE NOBODY ELSE JUST ME! I don’t care#uhm in conclusion cry about it?#WAAAAIT#I also never said arcane was copaganda#I quite literally specified my issues are w/ fans who can’t spare a single thought for a black characters that’s not ‘he’s so obsessed with#sad white girl 5’#again idc enough to think about the enforcers beyond what they mean to ekko or Mel#depends on s2 but so far#well now I’m thinking do I think it’s copaganda?#from a character standpoint maybe not but like any show that’s wants me to believe or root for a grown ass woman who didn’t realize cops#were bad. like there’s a lot of y’all irl but it’s a show yknow?#they diiid have that Caitlyn ekko fight and ekko was clearly correct but again the results of that are more fandom bias#um idk I’ll have to rewatch maybe! but I#did nooot say arcane was copaganda in the og post like I said I quite literally spoke on how I felt#oh but the way vi broke up that fight#hem hawwwww#conclusion vi wants to be copaganda for coochie but her common sense stops her from being completely stupid 💔 sad 💔
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almost forgot to post my comic for the @onedayakeshuake here !!!!
leftover sales end Sept. 30th, so if you want to hold our old man art in your hands, grab your copies today!!!
#persona 5#uncle Adachi au#goro akechi#akira kurusu#shuake#akeshu#old man shuake#VIVA LA OLD MEN!!!!#i mentioned on Twitter that I’m really happy to be able now to draw old man Akira without zine spoilers#and i haven’t drawn him yet#but It’s coming trust me#y’all are gonna see so much old man Akira I love him sm#his design is based both on Magnum PI and on Zenkichi while Akechi is just. Adachi#oh and a little bit of Spencer Reid ofc#Akechi also has crows feet bc . haha crows#valu said Akira reminds her of Greg universe which. yeah valid#i should give them a kid#i honestly still can’t believe the mods let me throw the uncle Adachi au in this zine lmao#anyway pls enjoy I had a lot of fun with this and y’all should hold this physically. eyeball these old men in the real life#we’ve got so many good artists and writers in here who had a lot of fun#and the charity is fantastic#so pls. im begging. Buy
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Amy Dunne Character Analysis
Disclaimer
This analysis will be of Amy’s character from both the book and the movie, although the 2014 movie adaption takes greater precedence with only some additional details and quotes included from the book as it does delve deeper into Amy’s psyche and add further characterization. Thus some traits may be accentuated further than they are in the movie, not being completely faithful to either story. It’s an analysis of Amy in her totality across mediums, of course being entirely my opinion. There are of course adaptational differences but I will not include the major ones from the books (ex. her relationship with Hillary Hand). This is an analysis focusing primarily on Amy’s neuroses she demonstrates and the childhood links to them, it doesn’t cover in-depth the events nor themes of Gone Girl.
Amy Elliott Dunne, the ever enigmatic dual protagonist- antagonist of Gone Girl is one of the most iconic female villains in modern memory, and one of the paragons of the “good for her” trope in media, is, frankly, one of my favorite characters of all time. As such I have been dying to write a full analysis examining her neuroses and characterization. Beneath the cultural perception of just another “crazy psycho” for girls to claim “she did no wrong” or “she just like me fr!”, lies a fascinating character who is masterfully written and developed by Gillian Flynn, as well as perfectly portrayed by Rosamund Pike. Amy Dunne is a character with a deep, complex psychology that I will do my best to thoroughly explore in this analysis.
From Amy’s childhood we first see the emergence of a literal high ego ideal, Amazing Amy. Of course this is the children’s book series created by her parents with a fictionalized version of Amy being the eponymous protagonist. This was a version of herself that rectified her own personal failures. Amazing Amy became a prodigy at cello, when Amy quit at 10, Amazing Amy made varsity volleyball, Amy got cut freshman year. Even in the (at time) final book in the series, Amazing Amy got married, a task Amy had not yet done. The entire book series revolved around Amy always making the most virtuous, the most selfless, the most perfect decisions.
>”With me, regular, flawed, real Amy, jealous, as always, of the golden child.”
An interesting detail in the book that is omitted from the movie is Marybeth’s numerous miscarriages and stillbirths (which totaled 7). All of these girls were named Hope, until Amy was born. Amy expresses her jealousy towards them, as they were always seen as perfect without ever living; meanwhile Amy herself has to live life everyday knowing that she will never truly live up to the Hopes. That she has to try everyday to be the best she can be. Her very birth was mired in the expectation of a perfect child; given that she was practically a gift from the heavens to her parents.
This sets up Amy’s perfectionism, as the childhood experience of never living up to a projected ideal led her to want to be perfect (and as we’ll later see, the expectation that everyone else is too), to live life always through the gaze of another. Evidently this leads to a loss of one’s inner essence, one’s individuality and sense of self.
>“-I’d never really felt like a person, because I was always a product” (Book Quote)
Amy’s obsession with personas can be seen as emerging from this, as she adapts a personality depending on who she’s interacting with, as to always be the most appealing she can, she is Amazing Amy after all.
>”I’m not sure, exactly, how to be Dead Amy. I’m trying to figure out what that means for me, what I become for the next few months. Anyone, I suppose, except people I’ve already been: Amazing Amy. Preppy ’80s Girl. Ultimate-Frisbee Granola and Blushing Ingenue and Witty Hepburnian Sophisticate. Brainy Ironic Girl and Boho Babe (the latest version of Frisbee Granola). Cool Girl and Loved Wife and Unloved Wife and Vengeful Scorned Wife. Diary Amy.” (Book Quote)
This general attitude leads to people trying to impress her as she places herself as someone special and especially someone to keep around. She entices both the characters and viewers of the film through her manufactured charisma and enchantment. However, we’ll see this dramatically backfire in her relationship with Nick, just you wait!
For now we can focus on the beginning of their relationship as well as what I believe to be Amy’s view on romance.
I believe that Amy has an impossibly high standard of love, one that stems from her perfectionism and general inability to let down her guise of being amazing. Not to mention how her parents were a perfect match, Amy even referring to them as soul-mates.
>”They have no harsh edges with each other, no spiny conflicts, they ride through life like conjoined jellyfish—expanding and contracting instinctively, filling each other’s spaces liquidly. Making it look easy, the soul-mate thing.” (Book Quote)
In her childhood it’s implied that she was into romance novels, specifically Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, which obviously contributes to the idealization of romance, of a literal scripted love.
>”You were an alienated teen and only Elizabeth Bennet understood you”
I think this little quote is incredibly indicative; it establishes a sense of alienation, of Amy never quite fitting in and blending with others.
>”So many lessons and opportunities and advantages, and they never taught me how to be happy. I remember always being baffled by other children. I would be at a birthday party and watch the other kids giggling and making faces, and I would try to do that too, but I wouldn’t understand why. I would sit there with the tight elastic thread of the birthday hat parting the pudge of my underchin, with the grainy frosting of the cake bluing my teeth, and I would try to figure out why it was fun.” (Book Quote)
Back to the topic of romance, through these stories it allowed her to imagine her perfect romance: if Amy could find that one person that truly understood her, beyond the illusion, that then would constitute a perfect union of love. She does deep down (whether consciously or not) want to be loved for who she is; not the idealized, palatable, literal marketed version of herself. Thus she holds trust as a premium, expecting that if she does the Herculean task of unspooling and revealing herself to another, that the other person would love her no matter what.
>”Can you imagine, finally showing your true self to your spouse, your soul mate, and having him not like you?” (Book Quote)
However all of this culminates in an impossibly high standard of a lover, of a practically divine mythical love; where one loves totally and absolutely. Of course where this neurosis is most demonstrated is in Nick and Amy’s relationship.
Amy comments that after meeting Nick she finally felt like a person as he brought out a side of herself that hadn’t been seen, in her own words “a lightness and an ease”, something that Amy enjoyed. In her eyes they had the perfect relationship in the beginning, Nick was her compliment with the witty banter, with their inside jokes, and charm.
However this doesn’t just vanquish her childhood neuroses, through her desire to be seen as perfect, she modifies herself to be a “cool girl” for Nick, complying endlessly to standards to maintain this perception.
>” When I met Nick Dunne, I knew he wanted a cool girl and for him, I’ll admit, I was willing to try.”
Amy essentially became Nick’s image of a perfect girl, witty, fun, and most of all easy-going and forgiving.
Yet one cannot live forever in images and ideas; and as such, the real, true Amy emerged. The Amy that cares too much, that’s hard to get along with, that is a controlling perfectionist. She also tests Nick through the treasure hunts, weaving in little details about their relationship as to challenge Nick and hope that he remembers the things they do together as deeply as she does. Combined with the 2008 recession and declining health of Nick’s mother (the consequences of which will be explored later). As well as Nick’s growing dissatisfaction in the relationship (evidenced by his worsening performances in the treasure hunts, the cheating, using her for sex and ignoring her otherwise, etc). The illusion both Nick and Amy were living in crumbled; they couldn’t possibly sustain their relationship as they were both striving to fulfill reciprocating images for the other.
One of the biggest parts of her character is Amy’s elitism and entitlement, in which she thinks of herself as someone superior, someone that deserves to be loved absolutely for who she is, although only to people she considers worthy.
>”She’s easy to like. I’ve never understood why that’s considered a compliment—that just anyone could like you.” (Book Quote)
Once again this stems from her childhood, in a seemingly contradictory way, she also sees herself as special for being the one that survived from her mother’s attempts, as well as the fact that her birth was so tumultuous that she would be an only child. From this also stems her entitlement for love.
Amy actively looks down upon women she considers “average”, whom she sees as coming from mediocrity and continuously perpetuating that in their lives. She scoffs at them with her wealthy parents and NYC background until her marriage with Nick crumbles. Only then does she realize that she’s become the very woman she would previously disdain. A woman with a failing marriage, the loss of her previous wealth following the recession, and moving to a failed development in Missouri (What the hell’s in Missouri?) for Nick’s mother.
I truly believe this, combined with Nick’s infidelity, and most importantly the loss of her idyllic love culminated in the iconic Gone Girl plan.
>”Nick took and took from me until I no longer existed, that’s murder. Let the punishment fit the crime”.
Nick took Amy’s identity, her sense of self that she so generously revealed to him and rejected her. Implying that she would only be loved if played the role of the “cool girl”; stripping her of who she really was, losing herself in yet another persona. Although Amy admits she doesn’t really have a personality and lives through personas, she still has a semblance of self that she holds dear.
>”-made me realize that there was a Real Amy in there, and she was so much better, more interesting and complicated and challenging, than Cool Amy”. (Book Quote)
Worse yet, Nick had cheated on her with a “newer, younger, bouncer Cool Girl”, leaving Amy in the dust, surely damaging her pride.
But Amy truly fell in love with her idealized version of Nick, believing that she was responsible for shaping that version of Nick. That she deserved that man in his entirety, of course what gets Amy to come back to Nick is the Sharon Scheiber interview, in which he promises to make up with Amy in just the way that makes her think that Nick is the one person who gets her. He makes the little references to their inside jokes (2 fingers on the chin when they’re not bullshitting the other) and a reference to the end of the treasure hunt (always a contentious issue in their relationship). She’s reminded of who he was, that he was once perfect for her, who else could know how to appeal to her heart in just the right way? With the same passion and conviction she reverses the judgment on Nick, clawing her way back to him. She does so in an especially brutal manner, slashing Desi’s throat with a boxcutter right after he climaxes. Putting aside my enormous personal bias against Desi, he was technically an innocent man, taking a great risk in sheltering Amy. However it’s clear that Amy sees him as merely an asset and something to be disposed of once he serves his value, as another prop in her ever evolving masterplan; she did string him along for years through their letter correspondences. He was just another casualty in Amy’s search for idyllic love. She comes back dramatically, literally falling into Nick’s arms while still covered in Desi’s blood like a dress; fabricating an elaborate story about a love obsessed former boyfriend kidnapping and violating her. Despite the glaring holes in her whole story (If Amy’s marriage was as bad as she made it out to be, why did she go back to Nick so easily? How did she get access to a knife and kill him so seamlessly? Why didn’t Amy do anything when she discovered the stuff in Margo’s shed? etc), law enforcement, media, and the public all fully believe it, infatuated with the persona and narrative that Amy’s created for herself. In the end she traps Nick into the marriage and eventually, the family. The last shot of the film is a haunting recall to the beginning shot of the film, as Amy has both revealed and secured herself to be the master of the narrative, finally obtaining her perfect love, no matter what the cost may have been.
Conclusion
Through a constant demand in Amy’s childhood emerges a need for perfection, simultaneously bringing about a sense of superiority and entitlement. The use of personas and façades facilitate this, painting Amy as the most amazing cool girl for whomever she’s performing for, to feed her need to be seen as perfect and desirable. Yet there emerges a psychological detachment from others; as the need to perform inevitably leads to an internal hollowness. However underneath all these layers there also lies the true Amy who has the deep unconscious desire of wanting to be loved absolutely, to have a perfect union of love where she can reveal herself fully and be loved for who she is truly.
>disclaimer for tumblr lol, this is not me trying to claim Amy was innocent I am fully aware that she’s a terribly entitled and narcissistic person but she can still be complex and have relatable desires & be a person even if she’s massively fucked up!!
#amy dunne#gone girl#gillian flynn#I love Amy Dunne so much#my little meow meow#analysis#character analysis#final draft of the analysis me thinks!!#unless I rewrite the conclusion which is very likely :P#I want to write one comparing the book to the movie#and speak on those said adaptional differences#my gone girl brainrot is terminal#(no I never referenced her typology in this whatttttt…..)#this doesn’t have much commentary into real life stuff (I am e5 ni base I can’t speak on such matters)#this is just a -why Amy is fucked up and the way she is- analysis#Also I don’t care if Amy isn’t actually that much of a she just like me fr character. I’ve said it okay and I’m a teenage girl (checkmate)#also b4 anyone comes for me & is like Amy literally says she doesn't believe in unconditional love#so then y would she crave it/doesn't that disprove ur point#well 1. she's unreliable as FUCK 2. note my use of unconscious!!#also fun fact. in one of the first drafts of the novel#her parents were (quote unquote) relationship experts that focused the idea of a perfect couple (another quote unquote)#& wrote a book called the undivided child: how to raise a perfectly whole being#which is just. lmao#the excerpts from that early draft r so fascinating
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Happy 25th Anniversary to me!! Frontal lobe get! ✨✨🥂
#nooo don’t hurt me I’m just a little guy#and it’s my birthdayyy I’m a little birfday boiii 🥺🥺🥺#I can’t believe I can’t blame my bad decisions on my lack of a complete frontal lobe now#goddammit#tis i#gods least favorite jester#thank you to everyone for sticking with me this long!!#I appreciate all of you and here’s to another whelming year! 🥂#making myself look hotter than I am in art yet again#the kids call this glazing#call me a donut the way I’m glazed tf out#sure wish someone would glaze meWHO SAID THAT#oh and happy birthday to Germany too I guess lmao#every fucking year it’s either the ‘it’s October 3rd’ or ‘Never Forget Oct 3’ meme#making Ludwig share his fucking cake with me
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Wanna write to escape crushing loneliness but I hate every word I put down :)
#shade speaks#vent#it’s tiny but for tags sake#I love living with a friend group that isn’t mine#super nice peeps but I am so lonely it’s not even funny :)#I feel like I’m left out of everyone’s lives :)))#someone put me out of my misery#I’m not even a side character at this point#I feel like a nuisance and I can’t even do anything#this stinks#whoever said college was gonna be the best years of my life#I didn’t believe you#and you’re a fucking liar#don’t mind me I’m wallowing on my blog lmao#also going home sucks cause my parents and I keep fighting lol#I just live far from everyone I know :(#and I don’t really have any friends up here#well I have four but they have their own lives u know#sigh
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Went to a Bear ghost concert last night. Fucking insane show I got a spot in the front right up against the stage. My eardrums are gone and my head is fucking pounding but god it was so worth it just for Rivers is a Vampire and Sirens live.
And of course the merch haul. There was a meetup with the band afterwards where I got my poster signed and a pic taken with them :)
#they gave out kazoos for Peas and Love so I’m counting that#not posting the pic becuase well. it’s got my face and my family and the most yall are ever gonna get is outfit pics#I’m anxious like that#either way hell of a time!!! can’t believe I was so close#I got a compliment on my vulture shirt from basically everyone lmao#the band manager (who ran the merch stand and gave me a free sticker for helping) said it was cool and I had good taste#the openers initially said my skirt (which had skulls on it) was scary and when I said it was to match the shirt they said it was scary too#and the lead singing saw my shirt after the show and went ‘oh vulture!!’ lol#dani speaks#bear ghost
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this is what mental illness looks like part 2
#aka I got iwtv and tvl on the fb marketplace#I SCREAMED WHEN I SAW IT AND THE LADY SAID SHE COULD SHIP THEM#THANK YOU MA’AM 🙏#I still can’t believe I found all of them for cheap#all thrifted or gifted or got from used bookstores or fb marketplace#or PangoBooks#the only one I paid over $8 for was the bookclub edition of iwtv lmao#all I’m missing now is the witching hour in hardcover#personal#courtney reads tvc
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the homies who are NOT surviving rio’s boot camp:
sasara
gentaro
doppo
#this is vee speaking#FCKING CHARISMA HOUSE ASS SONG AND MV WTF LMAO#kr said we bringing it back to when character songs sounded goofy as all hell are they healing nature or damning society lol#i can’t (can lol) believe rio got up on stage and decided the best performance he could put on for the nation was a drill LOL#kamio-san said it’s a good workout tho so maybe i should try it out lol how many reps was that in the chorus
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the people i work with are going to drive me fucking insane
#mine#id in alt text#all of these are real things that have come up in the past week btw :)#today my one coworker was like ‘i can’t believe these mothers. 13-14 year old daughters wearing skimpy little swimsuits’#and i’m fed up at this point so i was just like ‘i have not gone swimming in 5+ years because i don’t own a swimsuit bc#it’s impossible to find one that covers your ass. they’re just picking from a limited set of options’#it’s the short shorts thing all over again except they don’t make plaid bermuda short swimsuits as your One Modest Alternative#same coworker. half an hour earlier. telling me a joke where the punchline was that a guy said his girlfriend beat him. can we be for real#different coworker. last week. texting me a Divine Feminine Girlpower quote abt how men don’t understand a woman’s relationship to her sewin#when like. this is a sewing job. where we have make coworkers. some of whom are legit pissed they get stuck working with theheavy machinery#head in hands. i hate it here sometimes lmao
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“What if Good Omens ends on sad cliffhanger and nothing gets resolved because writer’s strike and how long it takes to film and—“
Michael Sheen and David Tennant made a blood oath to work with each other constantly on every project they will film this on an iphone in a closet with a shitty cloth green screen if they have to
#they cannot be separated#literally made a zoom show just so they had an excuse to talk during the pandemic#i dont think this is far from reality#can’t wait to suffer for 4 years!!#the fixing fics will be glorious lmao#good omens#good omens 2#good omens spoilers#good omens 2 spoilers#ineffable husbands#david tennant#michael sheen#aziraphale#crowley#writers strike#writer’s strike#they said in an interview they made a blood oath and i believe them#and yes i chose my words carefully with closet 😏
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Headcanons Overview of Lucid Eveningstar [default verse]
Lucid’s title is the “Angel of Dreams & Illusions”
Both the Morningstar and the Eveningstar are represented by the planet Venus in the sky. It is the first “star” to be seen in the evening sky and the last one seen in the morning sky.
He is a seraphim but not an archangel. The closest status he lands in is “guardian angel.”
His duties are to create dreams and illusions to “uplift and comfort the souls of others, both human and Winners.”
While Heaven is “perfect”, grief still exists. An angel discovering a loved one is either in Hell or Purgatory can be devastating and at risk of falling themselves. Lucid’s dreamsphere’s are an element provided through counseling and therapy to help try and prevent this from happening.
Lucid is not allowed to meet the Winner’s nor any other angels outside the archangel’s and high council. This is due to the fact he is crafted in the image of Lucifer and this secret could be detrimental if realized by others.
Created between 5,000-6,000 years ago, it was during a heavy period of grief for God (if you’ve seen the art of Big G it shows He has a darker side referred to as Void G). Creating a new angel in the image and power of his favorite angel Lucifer (Samael), it gave Him a brief period of joy and peace before slipping away and vanishing all together.
Lucid was created as a baby (a cherub really) to have the opportunity to grow up “nurtured, loved, and guided” into his rolls rather than be assigned right from the start. It is also thought that if any elements like Samael/Lucifer began to show through it could be stopped or curbed early in his development to avoid a potential disaster like his predecessor.
He was mainly raised by the archangels and select members of the high council, kept in secret within a citadel used for housing the Archangels.
Gods instructions to Sera included looking after Lil Lucid and guiding him towards the purpose he is meant to have. But unfortunately was rather vague on exactly how. It’s believed He figured since Sera loves and protects her sister Emily as a mother like figure that she would be an excellent guardian for the new angel as well.
Unfortunately with Sera’s desire to protect Heaven and her loved ones, this lack of instruction and uncertainty lead to Lucid being raised in secret and forbidden from many things, including creating life (plants & animals), interacting with the Winners, leaving Heaven (unless accompanied by one of the brothers), and a high limit on what he can manifest.
As Lucid grew and began his training, at major stepping stones he unlocked one of his seraphim wings. The last set was earned when he was given his title as The Angel of Dreams & Illusions
In the Dream Plane, Lucid can create and do anything and everything he ever wanted. It is here where in “safety” he can let his imagination fly and not be spied on as heavily by his superiors.
Lucid creates Dreamsphere’s that look like galaxies or worlds even, the glass like orbs lighter than a feather and fitting in the palm of one’s hand. Each dream is crafted differently and when orders come in for more specifics he creates them to fit them.
Each dreamsphere has the ability to adjust and fit the needs of its new owner, sinking with their emotions, memories and thoughts to craft the perfect lucid dream needed to uplift and comfort them.
Like Lucifer, Lucid could be a formidable opponent, if he had been trained to be as such. He has the same power and abilities of the former archangel angel, but the high council believed he may become exactly like the fallen angel. Thus they “instilled the fear of God” (or Heaven rather) into the seraph at an early age, reminding him that he is made in Lucifer’s image and that he will forever be at risk of falling. That he must never make the same mistakes as his predecessor.
Lucid is a heavily passive angel, choosing flight over fight and typically submitting to the higher ranking ones. However this fear has also lead to the angel to keep secrets and avoid telling full truths in certain situations.
He is used to having many of his questions and ideas dismissed or ignored. Due to this Lucid has become self-sufficient in seeking answers on his own. Usually in the massive library and archives. But after 5000 years of reading he has changed his sights on valuing in-person experiences
When Heaven began to execute Extermination Day on Hell, the focus and guard on Lucid heavily shifted. Noticing he was no longer so heavily under the scope, the young seraph began sneaking out of Heaven to find answers on his own.
#headcanons: make it so#default verse#(lmao I can’t believe I basically made Elsa with Anna’s personality x’D)#(sera said ‘conceal don’t feel’ and locked Lucid from the world)
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Hey ^^
Just finished catching up on the victors - just wanted to pop in and let you know that I'm enjoying it immensely and am very curious to see where you'll go with it.
Hope you have a great day ^^
thank you anon, i’m so glad you like it!!!! theoretically i’ll be updating Soon; chapter 4 is very close to being done and i’m extreeeemely excited for where it’s gonna go from there 😈
appreciate your message, thanks again for reaching out <3 hope you have a great day too!!
#sterge.eml#appreciate this message so much tbh. i’m very proud of that story#so nice to hear somebody likes it 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰#just hope i don’t lose people as it’s gonna get kind of uh. Ambitious#poor old man clod#between the boys and them girls i’ve been neglecting the vickyvesties for a minute now#i realized i had a problem with my pacing in my outline and had to restructure chapters 4 and 5#figured out i’d be introducing and resolving a conflict in the same chapter. can’t be doing that.#spent a long minute trying to sort that out#then when pride month hit i realized i was about to pull another femslash february and spend the month writing about an old man#so had to amend that and write a bunch of gay shit. you know how it goes.#but like a week ago somethin clicked and i figured out how to fix my issue with the chapter 🙌🙌🙌🙌#the vesties have been marinating for so long but now i’m ready to COOK!!!!!!!!#sooooo stoked for chapter 5… i’ve been waiting to write this chapter the whole time. i’m so excited about it.#i’m honestly struggling not to spoil shit ‘cause i’m so jazzed about what’s coming#i hope it lives up to how much i’ve hyped it up for myself ‘cause i cannot fucking wait to get to it#unfortunately i do think it will end up as six chapters now due to the pacing changes. oops.#back when i posted chapter one i said it would be three… shows what i know#can you believe i said i’d have an update schedule when i dropped the first two chapters. delusional of me.#i love lying#anyway. there’s more information about the situation with that story than anyone wanted or asked for lmao.#i should stop rambling in my tags so much but alas i don’t think i will.
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I’m always writing these damn breakup texts at 4 in the morning
#I didn’t realize how pissed I was until I was like hmmm it’s probably not normal to fantasize about your ‘friend’s’ apartment burning down#love her but I hate her but I love her etc etc#I hope something fucking horrible happens to her she deserves it#and yet I want nothing but the best for her#god I hate toxic friendships#anyways she has not initiated a conversation like literally all year#I think I’m well within my rights to block her#I’m just mad I didn’t do it sooner#lea talks#you have one unhealthy friendship in highschool and it sets you up to be fucked forevermore#every time I think I find someone who’s going to be a real friend#they do something terrible#I actually can’t believe she knows how bad I hate being ghosted due to the aforementioned high school friendship#AND THEN SHE DID IT ANYWAYS#why do I get stuck with the worst fucking communicators#girl TELL ME WHAT I DID TO PISS YOU OFF#i really did think we were close and then she just cut me out of her life and I don’t even know why#like even some of our last conversations#god#I don’t even know#vent post#urghhhh#lmao on the off off off chance she sees my blog#fuck you#if you didn’t want to be friends you could’ve at least said goodbye#I can’t believe I got a shit grade on my chem exam because I was comforting you through your stupid breakup
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wakefulness comes with a ✨price✨
#still can’t believe my bro actually rented a car just to drag me out of bed… granted it was on my dime but. smh#he’s a decent driver though. napping in the backseat was quite comfortable#still can’t believe my family tbh lmao. i told them many times that all i wanted to do today was to sleep#b u t they had somehow latched on to a passing remark i made like over a month or so ago about wanting to eat burgers from a certain place…#‘it only comes once a year; you can sleep after you leave your job on friday—’ they said… so welp.#man. at least i got good food and a few new plushies out of it. so it wasn’t all that bad… i think#either way i’m truly grateful to my mother and bro for everything. don’t tell them though; it’s embarrassing#u m. anyway. i guess i’ll finally have time to resume idol sengen after i’ve caught up on sleep?#i’m gonna try to zoom through the next 2 vols before mona’s album comes out s o. well. um. i’ll do my very best!!!!!#remind me to make the masterpost thing free for rbing once im done with it bc. y e a h.#anyways!! gn!! i gotta go fill up some forms or something before i forget lol. have a great week ahead!!!#l o r d i just realised i forgot to off rbs again aaaaaaa my memory is getting worse with age frrrrrr
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