#I could barely stand the show by that point anyway so I took it as my final cue to leave

[aakeysmash]

Tell me you love me

Pairing: f!reader x Sukuna Ryomen.

Word count: 2512.

Warnings: ANGSTTTTTT. An attempt at it at least lmao, let me know if I did a good job with it. A bit suggestive in the middle. Cursing. Mentions of cheating (mentions!!! No cheating in this house).

People often say that Sukuna would be obsessed with the reader/oc, but I think a relationship with him would be the hardest thing ever.

He doesn’t get the concept of being in love: at the start of your relationship he found out you were more tolerable than anyone else, he assumed that meant he liked being around you and went along with it. Of course he fell in love in the long run, but for him it’s embarrassing to admit it. He barely even said it when you asked him why he wanted you to move in with him.

It’s not like he isn’t obsessed with you: he’s obsessed with the way you just seem to get him, with the way you smile when he comes home from a long day at work, with the utmost kindness you treat people around you with and that he lacks completely. He’s mesmerised by you, by the curve of your hips, the brightness of your eyes, the softness of your hands on his body.

He doesn’t show it, though.

He’s used to being rough and redeems emotions as futile. Like he already said to you in a couple of your arguments, if you get him you get him, if not, he’s not explaining himself. Everything he does is thought of and automatically right, so why would he give you explanations?

But sometimes in relationships you need communication. He doesn’t see how intense it is to be next to someone who acts like he doesn’t care about what you want to share in your daily life. And again, he does care: if he could, he’d make a copy of you yapping and just listen to it on repeat while working. He loves how passionate you sound while talking about your hobbies, he finds the little tilt to your voice when you search for his approval adorable. He doesn’t see how difficult it is to be with him because he’s only been with you, and you’re so good at communicating and making him feel heard he doesn’t notice he’s not reciprocating your efforts.

And that means that he’s never the one who wants to resolve misunderstandings, because he thinks they don’t really exist. You were upset about your dish not coming out the way it was supposed to and instead of reassuring you it was still edible he straight up said it looked horrible and walked away? He’s not sorry. He spoke his mind, did he not? And why would you be sad about the truth?

You’re not weak, and you’re not shy either. Kind people are not necessarily stupid, and you’re living proof of that. He’d never be in a relationship with a weakling who doesn’t know how to raise her voice and stand her ground. You’re fierce in your own way, and you know how to manage his stubbornness 90% of the time. You don’t like being disrespected or ignored, and you made sure to talk his ear off whenever he did it. Not like he purposefully did it, anyway.

But as a person who understands emotions and feels emotions, sometimes being with him frustrates you. And it comes to a point where you debate on keeping being next to him or leaving him for good.

He’s not the only one who has hard days, but when both of you have one, the silence inside your house is deafening. You’re the one who usually starts up conversations, but your mind is occupied with other things. You’ve barely touched your food.

“What’s got your panties in a twist?” He scoffs at dinner. He doesn’t like you frowning, it wrecks his heart. It makes him want to destroy the face of whoever took the smile he lives for off your face.

You sigh. “You know how my parents said they were coming to visit us next month? Well-”

He’s silent. Fuck, when did she say this? He thinks. Probably one of those days where the thought of your thighs suffocating him all night plagued his mind last week. Fuck, he’d take a bite of them right now if you let him. Maybe he could suggest it. It could take his mind off of his own shitty day.

“Are you even listening to me?” You say sternly. He notices you kept on talking while his mind wandered, but he disregards it.

“Wanna fuck?” He asks instead.

You’re baffled. “Sukuna, what the fuck?”

“Damn, you could’ve just said no, brat,” he says rolling his eyes.

You get offended. “Don’t fucking ask me what’s wrong if you’re not going to listen to me.”

“Yeah yeah, you were probably going to talk about how worried you are and shit. I don’t care about that. If you don’t want to get my dick wet I’m going to rub one out,” he says waving his hand in front of your face and standing up from his chair.

You huff out a sarcastic laugh. “Are you serious?”

“Would you prefer me to find someone else to do it for me?” He bites, snapping his head toward you.

He sees you widening your eyes. If there’s a thing you don’t tolerate is cheating, or jokes about it. He knows it. He knows it, dammit. You’re fuming.

“You’re an asshole. Fuck you. I’m sleeping at Nobara’s,” you spit at him, grabbing the purse you left on the side of the table and rushing out the door, slamming it.

When he’s left alone in your shared living room, he keeps on looking at your front door. The silence is making his head hurt, the only thing he’s hearing is the sound of the door slamming. Did he overstep? Nah, you were probably overreacting. He shrugs and finally moves from his spot, going to put his dish in the sink. He leaves yours on the table, because maybe you’ll be hungry when you come home. You usually are after an argument. You’ll come back after a couple of hours saying you didn’t want to worry him too much, you’ll sigh saying this can’t keep on happening and that you’re tired of arguing, then he’ll hug you and everything will be alright. Just like it always is. You’ve never left like this, though.

He ruffles his hair; he’s angry at everything and everyone. You should’ve got that he’s the one overreacting, why didn’t you get him like usual? Why aren’t you still back after 3 hours? He hates feeling angry. He hates feeling tired. He hates feeling in general. Most importantly, he hates that the hands in his hair are his and not yours. He hates the way right now he’s craving your soft voice reassuring him in his ear, your sweet words covering him like a blanket; his head on your chest listening to your heartbeat while lying on your couch, reminding you that you’re there. You’ve always been there. There’s no one else for him, there’s never going to be one. He’d never cheat, you’re so stupid for getting angry about it. Why did you get so mad about it? Suddenly, he’s thinking about random stuff you said that he ingrained in his head.

I love you too, Sukuna. I’ll wait for you to tell me that without me forcing it out, mh? I’ll move in with you, sure, if you ask me so that nicely.

You picked this book because it reminded you of me? Thank you, baby. I love it. Both the book and the fact you thought of me.

Can you stop messing up my sock drawer? No, I did not hide your cigarettes there. But please stop smoking, I love when you taste like my lip gloss and not that disgusting shit you inhale. Give me a kiss so I can prove it to you. I’ll take your breath away way better than tobacco.

He smirks while on the couch, alone. You’re so cute. He wants to bottle up your laugh. Why aren’t you back still? His mind doesn’t stop, though.

You hurt me, Sukuna. Why can’t you notice?

I feel like you don’t care about me.

If I hadn't come to you, would you have come to me? Or would you just have ignored this whole argument and acted like nothing happened?

Am I just filling up a random space you leave open for a significant other or am I the significant other that’s capable of filling that void?

That night he dreams of you. The way you glared at him asking him if he was serious, almost like a warning before you lashed out. He dreams of the hurt that flashed in your eyes when he spewed nonsense. And when he wakes up, you’re still not back. Your unfinished plate is still on the kitchen table.

But he’s prideful, that’s why you’re the one that’s always trying to resolve arguments. Yes, you’ll come back. He’s sure of it. You always came back during the 3 years you've been together.

A week passes by and he's going crazy. You haven't contacted him at all, and he didn't text first. He lies to himself saying it's because he's leaving you some space, but the truth is that he's scared. What is he even supposed to say? Hey, I'm sorry, I miss you, please come home? That's pathetic. He's taking a shower when suddenly his phone rings. His heart skips a beat and he rushes out to check if it's you. Please, let it be you.

Instead it's Yuji, his brother.

Yuji: Hey, what happened with y/n? She asked me to come get some of her things for her. Is she sick?

Sukuna frowns. Then he realizes that- you're going to move out. You're going to break up with him.

He goes into panic mode. He never thought about the possibility of you leaving him. He thought you would come back, like you always do. Why would you leave him? Is it because you finally realized that you're better off with someone who knows how to express their feelings for you? Did you get tired of him? Have you already found someone else?

He finds himself knocking on Nobara's door in the next ten minutes. He ran, he's sweating and it's starting to rain. He's out of breath, and he gets his hands on his knees while he waits for you to open the door. He's not ready to let you go. He can't even fathom a life where he doesn't wake up to you trying to get warm between his arms, without you nagging him while watching a film together, without helping you bake cookies while laughing with each other. Without not being able to talk from how in love he is while looking into your eyes. And he knows that if you leave him he's never going to be able to live in his own house ever again, or walk down the street you always do together, or go grocery shopping and not thinking about you while looking at vegetables. You always said you liked vegetables and he always lied about liking them just to see you excited about cooking them together.

"Yuji, I didn't think you'd be this fas- oh," you open the door and your face falls when you see it's Sukuna. He snaps his gaze toward your face when he hears your voice. He missed it so much. You're so beautiful. He missed all of you. So much.

Neither of you move, you just keep staring at each other. This time, he knows he's going to have to talk first. For the first time, he realizes how hard it actually is to confront someone first. Do you feel like this every time?

"Come home," he says. "Please," he adds.

You look sad. "I don't think I'm going to, Sukuna. It's been more than a week and you didn't even reach out to say... I don't even know what. I know you don't say sorry. You never do."

Your words feel like knives. From where you're standing you're taller than him, and he has to look up to look at you. It's like he's in front of the pearly gates of heaven and an angel is making him confess all the wrong things he did, except in this scenario you're the angel and the things he did are just what he thinks about all of this. About you in general.

And you're right, he doesn't usually say sorry. The words get stuck in his throat and he just gapes up at you, still catching his breath. Pathetic.

You sigh, then go to close the door. You don't look at him anymore and he feels like he can't breathe, and not because of the run.

"I'll come get my things next week. Go home, you'll get wet," you say. And your voice is clear, you're not mumbling, you must have thought about this. He sees how hard you're clenching your jaw to appear resolute, your nails hurting your palms from how hard you're closing your hands. But you still manage to worry about him, worry about him possibly catching a cold from the rain. And he loves you. Fuck, he loves you so much.

"Wait," he manages to say. You look at him with longing. With sorrow.

And he feels like he's crying to the angel in his afterlife when he opens his mouth again, thorns in his throat getting tighter, suffocating him. But he doesn't cry here, in front of you, even if maybe you'd like it. You'd probably say that you appreciate him showing emotions, maybe tease him for it, but you'd like it. He'd kiss you while you're still laughing, saying you're stupid, and you'd continue laughing.

"I love you," he rasps out. The words feel so unfamiliar to his tongue, but so familiar to his ears. You always tell him you love him. "I'm sorry for being a shithead. Please don't leave me. I promise you I'll get better at this communication shit," he begs.

You still don't move, but he sees you getting softer.

"Go home, Sukuna. We'll talk about it when it's not raining," you utter.

"No, I don't fucking want to," he snaps. You're startled, and he cringes. He's really not used to all of this. He doesn't like scaring you.

"Fuck, I meant to say I want to get over it right now. I didn't want to scare you. I want you back, Y/N. Please, have me back. I'll get better for real," he says while getting progressively closer to you.

"You promise?" You ask, now shorter than him. You're a step of distance from each other.

"I promise, baby. I'll make you the happiest girl to ever exist," he tells you, looking at you intensely.

"Start by saying you love me again," you mumble, wrapping your arms around his waist and resting your head on his chest. He engulfs you in his own arms, inhaling the smell of your shampoo, then snorts.

"Sure. I'm in love with you, brat."

Being in a relationship with Sukuna is hard, but he loves you easily.

[baptismbaby]

୨୧ HEAVEN

drug dealer!ellie x reader summary: you and ellie don't really get along but tolerate each other for your friends, jesse and dina. when participating in a game of seven minutes in heaven at a party, the bottle lands on ellie. a small confrontation somehow leads to something more. warnings: fingering (r!receiving), ellie's kinda mean but not really wc: 4.1k<3

It was the end of the college semester and all finals were completed which meant it was time to let loose. After spending weeks tiring yourself out, crying, barely getting any sleep just to study, you were treating yourself with alcohol and whatever other substances that would be offered to you. On top of that, you needed to get laid. You knew your friends with benefits, Siobhan, would be there. You and Dina were ready, just waiting for Jesse to come and get you two. 

Jesse suddenly opened the door to your dorm and waved a hand urging the two of you to come out. “Let’s go,” he said. 

“What took you so long?” Dina asked, shutting the door behind her. 

“I was getting stuff.”

“From who?”

“TJ,” responded Jesse.

Both you and Dina groaned. The weed Jesse got from his dealer was too strong for the both of you. No matter how many times you told Jesse you were convinced he laced it, he would buy from him anyway. Plus, he overcharged his customers. 

“You know Ellie is gonna be at the party,” said Dina. “Why not buy from her?”

You made a face. Ellie was great friends with Dina and Jesse but you didn’t really like her. All she had to offer was good weed and discounts since you were friends with Dina. Other than that, you thought she was cocky. About a year ago, you were dating this girl who wanted to keep the relationship a secret because she was “closeted.” But really, she was also dating Ellie and when the two of you found out, you both showed up to her dorm together to confront her. You tried being friends with Ellie after but she’d brush you off. You thought maybe she hated you for it which you never understood. 

“I prefer TJ’s weed.”

“You’re insane, Jesse,” you teased.

“I don’t care if you guys think it’s laced. Whatever he’s lacing it with, works.”

The three of you walked out of the building and down the sidewalk. Luckily, the party was only a few blocks away which meant no one had to drive. 

“Oh, before I forget, are you gonna go back to Jesse’s dorm tonight Dina?” you questioned.

“Yeah, why? Gonna hit up Siobhan?”

“Oh, definitely. Haven’t seen her in a month and I need to get laid.”

“You’re still fucking Siobhan? I heard she got a boyfriend recently,” said Jesse.

Both you and Dina shot each other a confused look. “Boyfriend? She’s gay.”

“Don’t shoot the messenger, just something I heard.”

“Nah, Siobhan would tell me if she was dating someone.”

“Well… you did say she was sorta being dry recently,” Dina muttered.

“I mean, yeah, but she said she was stressed with her finals.”

“If I knew you were still fucking her, I would’ve said something sooner.”

“Jesse, what are you not telling me?”

You could hear muffled music from a distance as y’all got closer to the party. Jesse remained silent, hoping you would drop it. 

“Jesse,” you continued. “I will pinch you if you don’t tell me what you know.”

You neared the entrance of the party and grabbed the handle, turning it and pulling it open. You looked back at Jesse, waiting for him to say something.

“The boyfriend… might be TJ.”

“What?” you and Dina shrieked. Dina grabbed your arm and pulled you into the party, the both of you giggling and leaving Jesse behind. “He has to be joking!” Dina laughed.

“I’m saying, there’s no way!”

“Whatever, wanna go find Ellie to get some weed?”

“Sure, I guess.”

You started looking around the party, searching for Ellie. You finally noticed her standing in the corner with a joint hanging from her lips. You tapped Dina and pointed. “You go ahead, I’m gonna look for Siobhan,” you yelled over the music in her ear. Dina nodded and walked off while you went the opposite direction. You pushed past the crowd of people, glancing to see if you could see her anywhere. You finally saw her sitting on a couch with a red cup in hand. You smirked and walked faster, yelling out her name to get her attention. When she made eye contact with you, her smile fell from her face. You ignored it and held out your hand to help her up. She disregarded it and stood up on her own, placing her cup down on the table.

“Hey,” she said awkwardly. 

You raised an eyebrow and tilted your head slightly. “Hey, you okay?”

She sighed and placed her hands on her hips. You started to wonder if Jesse was right earlier.

“Look, I think we should just be friends.”

“Okay, that’s fine,” you said.

“Cool. I’m sorry if I wasted your time or anything.”

“Nah, we were just hooking up. No hard feelings.”

“Yeah, I just wanted to experiment a bit-”

“Wait, huh?” you interrupted. “Experiment?” 

Siobhan averted her gaze to the floor. “Y-Yeah, to see if I liked girls. I had a great time with you, you’re amazing. I just prefer men.”

“You told me you were gay,” you said, although it sounded more like a question. 

“I didn’t think you would’ve wanted to do anything with me if I said I wanted to experiment.”

“Siobhan, that’s fine but you should’ve said so.”

“Okay. Are we cool?” she asked, obviously wanting to end the conversation.

You shrugged. “Sure… I’m gonna go now. Have a good night.”

You spun around and sped walked to the other side of the room where Ellie and Dina were standing. They were deep in conversation and didn’t acknowledge you at first. You rested your hand on Dina’s shoulder to get her attention, causing her to jump.

“Jesus!” she exclaimed. 

“Jesse was right!”

Ellie watched you and Dina talk over each other in confusion. All she could catch from the conversation was “experiment,” “straight,” and “Siobhan.” Ellie tapped your shoulder and gave you a look. “What the hell are you yapping about?”

“Her friends with benefits was-”

“Sh, Dina!” you whined. “Don’t tell her!”

Ellie understood what Dina was about to say anyways, based on what she heard before. Ellie chuckled and shook her head in disbelief.

“What?” you asked.

“That’s embarrassing,” said Ellie. 

You rolled your eyes and ignored her. You leaned back against the wall, your eyes darting across the room to see if there was any girl you were interested in and who might be interested in you. But most of these girls you knew were in relationships or were straight. You sighed in defeat and crossed your arms. “Let’s go smoke,” you muttered, tugging Dina’s shirt to follow you. You were looking for a place to sit when you noticed people sitting in a circle. “Wanna go over there?”

“They’re playing seven minutes in heaven,” Ellie said.

“Ugh, what are we, in middle school?”

“Might be kinda fun. Maybe you can get lucky in a closet since your hookup ditched you for dick.”

You glared up at Ellie and smacked her arm. Ellie put her hands in the air with a smirk. “Just saying.”

You thought over it, knowing Ellie was right. If you couldn’t hook up with anyone else, you might as well makeout with a stranger in a closet. “Let’s go,” you groaned. The three of you made your way over to the group.

“Hey, Ellie,” one of the boys greeted. “Coming to play?”

“Yeah, me and her.”

“I’m just here to watch,” said Dina, sitting outside of the circle. Ellie sat next to the boy and you sat on the other side next to a girl. 

“Hey,” the girl slurred. She was shitfaced, her cheeks were red and she kept giggling. “Your necklace is soooo cute!”

“Oh, thank you!”

“Quit chit chatting, Ivory. It’s your turn to spin the bottle!”

The girl, who you now knew as Ivory, perked up and crawled ungracefully to the bottle. She spun it weakly, the bottle landing on a guy to the left of you. He stood up, tripping over nothing but catching his balance. He was equally as wasted. The two of them stumbled away, holding onto each other.

“The closet is over here!” Ellie’s friend yelled. Everyone laughed when they kept going and walked into the bathroom. “Well, I guess it’s your turn.”

You realized the man was talking to you. You cleared your throat and leaned over to grab the bottle. You placed it on the ground and spun it hard, causing it to roll to the other side. It slowed down and tapped Ellie’s foot. 

“Oooohh, Ellie!” her friend teased. “Isn’t that the girl Lisa cheated on you with?”

“Yikes, that’s awkward,” someone else said. You gave Ellie a dirty look as she stood up, walking over to you with her hand held out. “Get up,” she demanded. You grabbed her hand and was yanked up roughly. Ellie dragged you into the closet and slammed the door behind her.

“You know, we could’ve-”

“Shut up,” Ellie grumbled.

The two of you tried hard to be as far away from each other as possible but it was difficult. The closet was too small. 

“Lisa didn’t cheat on you with me, by the way,” you muttered.

“I don’t want to talk about that.”

“Fine! I guess we’ll stand here in silence.”

Ellie groaned, rubbing her eyes and covering her face behind her hands after. “Why did I suggest playing this stupid game?”

“Hey, you could’ve said no when the bottle landed on you.”

“I’m not a pussy,” Ellie defended herself.

“Whatever.”

The way you had to stand was awkward. Ellie’s feet were together, your feet on either side. You wanted to laugh at how ridiculous you looked but didn’t want to annoy Ellie again. 

“Here,” said Ellie, putting her left foot on the other side of your right one. She pushed your foot against her other one so you weren’t in the position you were before. Now, you and Ellie’s feet were intertwined. “You looked uncomfortable.”

“Thanks.”

Ellie crossed her arms, her eyes fixed on you. You looked down to avoid making contact.

“What’s the deal with you and Siobhan?” Ellie suddenly asked.

You scoffed. “Why would I tell you? So you can laugh at me?”

“I won’t laugh. Swear. I just kinda feel like you might wanna talk about it. Might as well talk about it now.”

You sighed, holding out your pinky. “Promise?”

Ellie reluctantly wrapped her pinky with yours. “Um, sure. Promise.”

“Well, I matched with Siobhan on a dating app two months ago. She said she was looking for a fuck buddy and I thought she was pretty cute so we started fucking. But then we got busy, she was dry with me after a month and come to find out, she’s straight and was only experimenting.”

“Damn,” said Ellie. “That sucks.”

“Yeah, tell me about it.”

“Was she any good?”

“Huh?”

“Was she any good?” Ellie repeated.

You shrugged. “She was okay. I was kinda desperate, I guess. I’m not a top but I topped for her. I tried getting her to top me but she refused.”

Ellie raised an eyebrow. “Wait, you’re not a top?”

“Um, no,” you scoffed. “I prefer being a bottom. It was my first time topping, actually. Or… being dominant, I guess is the correct term. So, I guess we were both experimenting.”

Ellie started laughing. She put her hand on the wall beside your head to keep her balance. 

“What’s so funny?”

“You’re bullshitting!”

“Hey, I’m not bullshitting!”

“Dude, we both were dating the same person once. You’re lying,” Ellie retorted. Her laughter had died down and her demeanor changed. She was serious and seemed slightly irritated.

“I wasn’t dominant with Lisa,” you uttered. “Were you?”

“Yeah, I was.”

“Oh… didn’t know she was a switch. She never told me that.”

Everything got really quiet again. You checked the time on your phone, wondering if the seven minutes was close to being done yet.

“She did cheat on me with you,” said Ellie. “You said she didn’t but she did.”

“Ellie, she was playing both of us. And yes, she cheated on me with you. Her and I were dating before you guys were.”

“If you say so.”

“Dude, get over it. It happened over a year ago. It’s in the past. Maybe you should be angry at her and not me.”

“I am angry at her and not you.”

“You were so cool at first,” you continued, disregarding what she said. “I thought we were gonna be friends after what happened. I thought us confronting her together was something we were gonna laugh about after but you blew up on me and ignored me. Now, you’re rude anytime I’m around.”

“I was wrong for that,” Ellie admitted. “I’m sorry.”

You were surprised to hear an apology from Ellie. Everything you had planned to say vanished. You rested your hand on her shoulder and squeezed it gently. “It’s okay. I wanted to blow up on you when I first found out about you. But I knew it wasn’t your fault.”

“I know it wasn’t yours either. I was… ugh, nevermind.”

“You can tell me.”

“Forget it.”

Ellie hated talking about her feelings with her own friends. The fact that she was opening up to you a bit terrified her. You kept staring at her intently, a small smile on your lips. You never noticed but she was actually very pretty. The way the light from the crack in the door hit her face made her look ethereal. 

“You know, I was kinda hoping there would be someone out there I would wanna hook up with,” you said, changing the subject. Ellie chuckled and nodded.

“Yeah, not a lot of options out there, huh?”

You shook your head no and laughed, leaning your head back on the wall. “I wonder how long we’ve been in here.”

“I think we got a couple minutes left,” said Ellie.

“Guess I won’t get lucky in a closet either,” you joked. 

“Do you want to?”

You snorted. “I mean, there’s no one out there who interests me.”

“Well, I’m here.”

Your eyes widened. Ellie stepped forward, completely closing the space between the two of you. Her hand was pressed against the wall as she towered over you. She glanced down at your tight shirt that hugged your chest perfectly. “Not gonna lie, you look good tonight.”

“Ellie…”

“What?”

“C’mon, you’re high. You don’t mean that.”

Despite how weird you were starting to feel, you couldn’t ignore the throbbing between your legs. Your breath grew heavy as she licked her lips and brushed her fingers along your jaw. You were frozen, staring up at her in shock. Ellie’s hand dropped to her side and she laughed. “I’m just joking, dude. Damn, you should see your face right now. Like a deer in headlights.”

“Not f-funny, Ellie,” you mumbled, your face still buzzing from how gentle her touch was.

“What, did I get you all worked up?” she taunted.

Before you could respond, there was a banging at the door. “Time’s up!”

The door opened and you rushed out, leaving Ellie behind. You looked over your shoulder to see her smirking at you. You sat down in the closest chair that was out of view for Ellie, fighting to catch your breath. You felt confused. How was it that it went from the two of you arguing to her making a move on you? Sure, she was just teasing. But the way she looked at you made you think otherwise. You pulled your phone out of your pocket and texted Dina.

hey, where r u????

going back tojessses dorm

hpw was thr closwet???

girl are u wasted… i didnt even see u drink anything tf

a tiny bot i stple a bottle:)

the closet was fine we said nothing to each other the whole time

damn dina did u even eat today???

nopr! srry for missinh it got tpo sick

dont be sorry, drink some water n go to bed. feel better xo

You shoved your phone back in your pocket and sighed. Your mind was going crazy thinking about what happened. To make matters worse, you started wondering how it would’ve been if Ellie was being serious. If she kissed you, felt you up a little bit. Would you have liked it?

-

After an hour of small talk with a few other people and two drinks, the party was finally dying down. Mostly everyone had left and the music no longer played. Usually, you’d be gone by now. But you stayed because Ellie was still there. You could see her eyeing you from across the room, rolling a joint to give to one of her friends. You were gonna wait until she left to go to. A few minutes passed and she finally stood up, making her way to you. You sighed and got up from your seat, waiting for her to approach you.

“Thought you would’ve left by now,” she said once she was a few feet away from you.

“Yeah, me too.”

Ellie leaned against the counter and smiled. “Did you find someone to hookup with?” You shook your head no. “Me neither.”

“Damn,” you mumbled.

“Come home with me.”

You raised an eyebrow at her. “Seriously? Playing a prank on me again?”

“No, I’m not. You’re being annoying asking too many questions all the time. Just get your shit and come with me,” she demanded. You grabbed your bag and followed Ellie. You jogged a bit to catch up so that you were walking by her side. She opened the door for you, watching your ass as you stepped out.

“Is Dina with Jesse tonight?”

“Yeah,” you answered.

“Was wondering where she went.”

“She got too drunk.”

“When did she drink anything?”

“When we were in the closet, apparently,” you said.

“Did you tell her what I did?”

“No.”

“Atta girl,” praised Ellie. You blushed, your heart racing. 

“I thought you were ‘just joking,’ Ellie.”

“I was kinda but… we both wanna fuck and there’s no one else to fuck. Thought we could help each other out.”

You said nothing and picked up the pace when the cold air blew harder. You wrapped your arms around yourself as an attempt to feel warm but it didn’t help. You mentally cursed yourself for forgetting a coat.

“Wanna borrow my hoodie?” Ellie asked.

“It’s fine.”

“You can wear it until we get there,” Ellie pulled her hoodie over her head, revealing a baggy black t-shirt and her tatted arm. She threw it at you and chuckled when you yelped. 

“Thanks, Ellie.” You shoved it over your head and sighed at the warmth. You could smell her cologne and weed, which comforted you. Ellie’s phone started to ring. She groaned and pulled it out, answering without checking the ID.

“What?” she snapped. She slowed to a stop and sighed. “Dammit, okay. I guess I’ll go to my girl’s dorm instead. Bye.” Ellie shoved her phone back in her jean pocket, cussing under her breath. “We’re gonna have to go to your dorm.”

“That’s fine,” you said.

“Not really. I told my roommate I was bringing a girl home and to go to his girl’s place if he finds one. He doesn’t listen.”

“Well, luckily I have the room all to myself since Dina is with Jesse.”

The dorms came into view. You were growing anxious, suddenly aware of what was about to happen. You wanted this and you knew you did. At first, it was because of desperation. But now, you wanted it because it was with Ellie. You felt strange. You didn’t even like her. You weren’t even drunk enough to blame it on alcohol. Maybe it excited you to have sex with someone you hated. Whatever it was, you didn’t care. At least you were getting something.

When the two of you finally got to your dorm, you both stood there awkwardly. Ellie’s boldness from earlier was long gone. You set your bag down and kicked your shoes off. “I’m gonna take my makeup off,” you mumbled. Ellie stayed quiet and sat down on the bed, studying the posters on your wall. Since Ellie wasn’t looking, you decided to undress and change into a tank top. You got the last bit of makeup off and threw the wipe in the trash. You sat down next to Ellie, gaining her attention. She smirked at the polka dot boyshorts you were wearing. 

“That’s real grown up,” she teased. 

“Hey, they’re comfortable.”

Ellie placed a hand on your thigh, slowly running it up and down your exposed skin. ��I wish we could’ve gone to my place,” she whispered, her hand getting closer to your panties. You didn’t realize you were holding your breath until you went to speak. “W-Why?”

“I was gonna fuck you with a strap. And you could’ve been as loud as you wanted.” Ellie tugged on your thigh, signaling you to open your legs. You spread them and watched Ellie lean over to admire the wetness that showed. “God, I was gonna fucking ruin you. Get up and strip for me,” she commanded. You got up and stepped between her knees, letting her run her hands all over your body as you pulled your tank top over your head. “Fuck,” she breathed. She grabbed your chest and squeezed tightly, eliciting a moan from you. She sat up and wrapped her mouth around your nipple, her tongue going in circles and flicking the bud. Your fingers went through Ellie’s hair and tugged at the strands. She groaned, wrapping her arms around your body and slamming you onto the bed.

She shoved your panties down and put her hand over your cunt. You bucked your hips forward, begging for her to do more. She brought her thumb down and placed it on your clit. “Is this what you wanted?”

You nodded, a whine escaping your lips as she moved her thumb in a circle over the bundle of nerves. She grinned watching your body writhe in pleasure. Your soft moans filled the room, growing louder as she sped up. Her hand covered your mouth to stifle them. “Sh, sh, sh… don’t want anyone hearing, do you?” You shook your head. “Then shut up, will you?”

You tried to keep quiet but it was hard. Ellie was too good with her fingers. You could already feel that familiar burning in your stomach, meaning you were close. Ellie noticed your squeals and whimpers were coming out quicker and more desperate. She kept her thumb on your clit and slipped in two fingers, pressing down harder on your mouth to muffle your whining. She fingered you at a fast pace, her thumb still going in circles. You felt dizzy, overwhelmed with how good it felt. Ellie put a third finger in, your cunt tightening around her digits. Ellie was amused watching you come undone beneath her. Before you knew it, your orgasm took over you. It was powerful, coming in waves that made your body convulse and forced you to bite your lip hard to keep from screaming. Ellie pulled her fingers out and sucked them clean. 

You laid there, fighting to catch your breath. Ellie leaned over and grabbed your tank top and panties, placing them beside you. She got up and disappeared to the bathroom and came back out with a wet rag. “Here,” she said as she held it out to you. “You kinda made a mess.” You took the rag and raised up, cleaning up your thighs and handing it back to Ellie. “Thanks,” you mumbled. You shoved your clothes back on and got underneath the covers while Ellie sat on Dina’s bed. You felt awkward with the uncomfortable silence that fell over you two. You wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words.

“I… think I’m gonna go,” said Ellie, standing up to grab her hoodie. “I’ll text you, okay?”

“Oh, okay. Get home safe.”

Ellie left without saying anything else. You were so confused. You had a great time with her but once it ended, you felt weird. Like it wasn’t supposed to happen but at the same time, you were elated. You’ve never came so quickly before in your life and it definitely never felt that good. You had no clue how it got to this point. She spent the whole year either ignoring you or being short with you. Tonight was the first time she actually really talked to you and you realized that before the closet. You wondered if she really would text you. This was a one time thing and you knew that. A part of you wished it wouldn’t be.

[jhuzen]

work for it [m.reader]

THIRD ONE FOR MY COMPENSATION GOOD GOD. anyway this one ain’t genshin as you can see. this is in celebration of imbibitor lunae, as your numero uno whore, i oFFER ANOTHER QUICKIE, really this took me 30 minutes because i’m so horny after kazuha and neuvillette. loosely based on this brainrot this anon and i fucking convulsed over. you’re also getting a full fic one day IL anon *kissy kiss*,

𖦹 nsfw, dan heng has two cocks, needy dan heng/feng, he’s a little pillow princess and i hate it, desperation, top male reader (tho switch implied)

“So needy…”

Your words were sending him into overdrive, his mind could barely comprehend a single thought that went through him. At this point the only thing Dan Heng could ever make out, though faintly, was the fact that it feels good, and that you were doing him so well.

You took the backseat momentarily. You had greatly underestimated what it meant for your majestic stoic lover to suddenly transform into what seems to be a very… ancient race of draconic humans. A Vidya— whatever.

And to even say that you had greatly underestimated him, would be an understatement in of itself. Because suddenly, your standoffish Dan Heng, whom you’ve clung onto relentlessly (bothering him to no ends that it even frightened Welt, the most patient man in the Express, about how well you’re truly testing Dan Heng’s patience), was suddenly the one clinging to you.

Though it wasn’t overt, but everyone in the Express sees it. Whenever March would pass by with Caelus, whenever Himeko looked up from her possibly fifth coffee for the day, whenever Welt would come to ask something — they could all see how tightly wrapped that long tail of his around your body.

It started off with the familiar subtlety, akin to his very ghostly kisses whenever he’d accidentally dip his head to grab a book from behind you. His tail would wrap around your leg. And as days go by, that very tail would increasingly become much higher, first around your shin, then to your knee, then to your thigh. Until it reached its rightful place, with a tail constantly curled around your waist like a persistent snake.

Don’t even get started on the nights.

Either way — the bottom line in the Express, is that dragons will remain relatively protective across all worlds. The premise is the same. They are the same creatures that look after what they own, protective — even jealous to a fault. Though, to his credit, Dan Heng was able to keep everything within the lines of sheer subtlety. He knew how and when to tone it down, courtesy of his relatively calm life before… his revelation as the high elder of his very… majestic species.

Though, as it stands, it seems that his looming presence and consistent insinuation that you were his wasn’t the only thing that amped up.

And tonight, you’ve truly admitted defeat to the stamina monster that was your draconic lover.

Dan Heng as the Imbibitor Lunae was someone you can only call an insatiable first timer.

He was meek as he relished in your kisses, whimpering and shaking like a frightened prey as he continued to indulge in such affections that you openly showed him. He was helpless in your grasp, only letting out the neediest whines as he continued to try and cover himself despite the fact your hand was already on his fascinating cocks, protruding and standing proud under your sensual touches. Your fingers covered in his previous release as you continued to pump your hand, easily engulfing his shafts that twitched under your grip.

Dan Heng could only writhe as pleasure racked through every inch of his quivering body. And oh, the way you mouth at his sensitive nipples, sucking on them as if your life depended on it, it was enough to leave his mind in complete shambles.

His cries echoed through the room and if anyone could listen, they’d be certain to hear the intimate bliss within the tone of his sweet moans and gasps.

And even you had to share the sheer pleasure as you sunk into him, you watched yourself get swallowed whole by his entrance, and little by little you could feel just how warm his tight walls were, soft and tender, absolutely drenched just from your ministrations.

Within the lusty haze your mind drowned in, you promised yourself to get in a couple of rounds until Dan Heng pleads for no more.

You were the first to tap out.

It could have been the sixth or fifth, but you were done, your body ached for some rest and yet your pretty pillow prince absolutely refused to let you go, with his possessive tail cuffing you into him, letting you continue on with your plans to fucking him into oblivion.

It’s not that you can’t cum anymore, the erotic sight of your lover can keep you going. But the rest of your body that is somehow not your dick cannot keep up with the endless demands. So you figured you’d withdraw the spoiling for now and let Dan Heng work for his next few orgasms while you sit back and relax.

Which leads to the present — you watching in genuine fascination as your poor dragon sobbed and pleaded for you to switch places for him.

“Oh, you do not know how to ride at all.” Your admonishing came out in a purr and you could feel him clench around your cock as he continued to sloppily ride you with the gusto of an inexperienced virgin. And you loved it. There was a certain charm to Dan Heng’s neediness crossing with his absolute ineptness in even finding the right place to hit even with your own throbbing length under his mercy.

Dan Heng was an inexplicable mess, his long hair completely sprawled out through his creamy skin that was laced with a sheen of sweat. Pitiful tears adorned his luminescent eyes that glowed with so much desperation for you. His bottom lip bled with how many times he chewed on it every time he thought he’d reach his climax, only to completely fall flat when he would freeze up and lose the momentum and friction.

“Come on now, love, you’ve done so much~ surely this is a walk in the park for you,” you jested with a teasing grin, a hand interlocked with his and he squeezed yours tight as he started over again — another agonizing round that he cannot cum over.

“P-Please, switch… switch w-with me, I-I need you…” he begged, sobbed even with crocodile tears and all. He placed his hands on your chest, propping himself up, trembling. His nails dug into your flesh as he continued to plead for you while he bobbed his hips up and down in such a sloppy manner.

A smirk graced your lips as you took his hand, pressing the softest and sweetest kisses on his palm and on his knuckles, looking at his eyes that brimmed with more tears with your half-lidded ones.

“But I’m all tuckered out, baby,” you murmured into the palm of his hands, lips trailing into his fingertips with more kisses. “Think after this, we can call it a day?” You prodded with a teasing tone and in an instant, you could feel his walls clench tighter around your cock, an act of defiance, a complete refusal to your tiny suggestion.

“N-No—! W-Want more… I need more…” Dan Heng’s pleas reached your ears like an angel’s cry and you indulged in it.

Your hand found his shafts quick, expertly rubbing through his cocks that throbbed within your ministrations, “Surely this is enough then? You just need to cum, right?” You taunted with a sly grin as you lazily pumped your hand around him.

It would’ve been enough, for anybody.

But not your pillow prince. Dan Heng’s hand quickly grabbed your wrist, stopping your movement. He softly groaned as he fully sat on your lap, your cock buried to the hilt inside him. He shook his head with a vehement rejection, he looked at you with aching need, his hips squirming on yours from feeling so stuffed up.

“N-No…”

“No? But I thought—”

A sob tore from his throat as Dan Heng leaned down, his nose on the crook of your neck, “No,” he parroted with a pitiful yet so very adorable sniffle. “‘S not enough.”

“Not enough?” You parroted with a fake frown.

“Not enough…” He whined. While the tempting bliss of cumming just with your skillful hands was all the more inviting, it didn’t feel right.

It could never feel right if he came without you balls deep inside him. He wanted to feel more of the warmth that you offered every time you painted his walls white, he craved the very sensation of you flooding him with little to no regard for anything else — just breeding him until he somehow magically bends the biological process of a Vidyadhara and gets to carry your children.

You cooed softly, placing a hand on his head and bringing it down to plant a sweet kiss on his forehead. He preened at the soft affection as he melted in your touch.

“Such a needy dragon you are,” you laughed before pulling out and swiftly switching positions.

Dan Heng laid on his back, shivering in anticipation while you positioned yourself in between his quivering thighs. Your lips couldn’t help but curl up in smug satisfaction as he looked at you with a feral need to be bred by you, and yet, he only laid there with the expectation that you’ll do most of the work again.

Of course, that wouldn’t do.

You crawled up to him, length brushing against his clenching rim with such demand. You caged him in your arms as you tilted your head with the ever-so present smirk on your pretty face.

“I’m still all too tired, love,” your words caught him off guard, “You gotta help me out a little here.”

His wide-eyed innocence was torturously delectable. Your hand slid down to grip onto the meat of his thighs, raising it up, “Hold yourself up for me, pretty please?” You pleaded with a charming smile, earning yourself an all too eager nod from your draconic lover.

You could only pull back with a satisfied smile as Dan Heng held his legs spread open for you, his fingers digging into his own flesh with such visceral need and he could only look up at you pleadingly.

“P-Please…”

Lining yourself up, you watched your own cock sink into Dan Heng’s quivering hole with such ease, a soft sigh escapes your lips contrasting a rather deep cry from him. He jolted as you bottomed out and magically managed to hit that sweet, sweet spot of his with so much ease.

His hands that held up his legs almost gave out, his back arching with the raw pleasure that you brought.

Before he could even beg you to move, your hips drew back and snapped back into him. Your thrusts were merciless, leaving no room for your spoiled beloved to complain. You could only indulge in his soft cries that reverberated through the room and the sinful sounds of your skin slapping against each other with every decisive thrust that you made.

Dan Heng was sure to reach the high heavens with the very feeling that you brought inside him, his walls tightening up against you with so much need.

A strangled gasp weaseled out of Dan Heng’s drying throat as you leaned down to mouth at his already sensitive buds, your teeth and tongue in pursuit of relentlessly assaulting his poor chest with every suckle and bite until they were too sensitive for anything.

“H-Hah—! N-No more—!” He whimpered, as his hands left his thighs, clutching onto your hands that sunk into the dip of his narrow waist. “T-Too fast…!”

His complaints only spurred you further to keep doing so, sounding more like an encouragement as your hips continued to move and push into him, with the carnal need to just make him feel every inch of your cock. Tears spilled from Dan Heng’s eyes, and he could only gasp out your name as the highest pleasure engulfed his body.

Thin ropes of cum spurts out of his cocks as you pushed out another orgasm from him, you following closely as you filled him up with so much of yours.

An exhausted sigh leaves you, groaning as you fell into Dan Heng, “Next time, you’re doing all the work.”

Dan Heng only blinked, “What do y—gck…!” He jolted as your hand grasped on his cocks with a lazy smile.

“It’s two for one, at least let me experience a good bargain for once in my life.”

Your words only left him breathless and eager.

[bluecollarmcandtf]

How to Use Your Meat Suit

I can't believe how awesome this weekend was! Let's just say that the perfect way to avoid a hangover is to just possess randos to take the hit for you!

It all started on Friday, when I took Tyler just as he got out of practice. He never saw it coming, and once his body was an empty suit for me to wear, I was ready to hop in and have the best night of my life!

I could actually feel the lingering adrenaline from his workout, and it was exhilarating! I tossed his bags aside and ran to my house party down the street, which was easy with his limber legs. Everyone went wild when I showed up as the star basketball player. They didn't care about his BO; they were just happy to watch me flex those freshly pumped arms.

Friday night went by in a flash of loud music and crowded dancing, but a lot of people started wondering why Tyler got piss drunk and began grinding against all the guys.

I don't have much to say for myself other than I may have put a little too much alcohol in his body and lost control. Drinking makes me horny, and I sure did not care about Tyler's former reputation. People might not think of him as the cool lady-killer he used to be, but that's not my problem.

Anyways, I dropped his body when a cop busted us around 4 am. I could barely stand, I was so drunk, so I'm not surprised Tyler collapsed to the floor the second I stopped puppeteering him.

I jumped into the policeman who'd shown up.

It was weird to go from blackout drunk to stone-cold sober, but I quickly gathered my bearings. Now in control of the cop, I pried the drink from Tyler's sweaty limp fingers and sloppily swallowed it all! The crowd went wild, and the party raged on.

And just like that I went back to dancing and drinking, only I was now wearing the body of an on-duty police officer.

Being a little more sober, I spent the early hours of Saturday morning trying to hook up with someone. I think most of the guys there were a little too intimidated to be talking to a cop, but I eventually found someone.

This guy walked up to me and called me a pig. I think he was trying to offend me, but he only succeeded in turning me on. I pulled him close and oinked in his ear playfully. He got the message and dragged me to an upstairs bedroom. The rest of the night was a blur as I continued to down drinks, but I could definitely tell that my date was getting off on degrading the officer I had on.

The officer's body eventually collapsed to the floor in a drunken exhaustion, so I jumped out. It was almost midday by then, so I ventured outside and found someone else to possess.

There was this construction site across the street. Several of the workers were idly chatting about the nearby house party that was still going strong.

Without warning, I hopped into the contractor; he was the only man there that wasn't fat, old, or ugly. He certainly smelled ripe, but I rather enjoyed how filthy he was. Wearing his masculine body instantly tented the pole in his jeans, but I didn't bother trying to hide it from his coworkers.

I quickly ordered them to take the day off, which left them mostly confused. I'm sure I was acting out of character, but I didn't care. I just waved the team away, and marched down the street to a bearby liquor store.

There, I fished out all the cash in the guys wallet to use on booze. It was a good thing his body was strong enough to haul it all back on his shoulders. Though the party was starting to wind down, it quickly revamped when I restocked the drinks. Before long, I was back to drinking and dancing on any guy who'd let me, only this time I was wearing the construction worker's body.

That party lasted all weekend. It quickly became a legend on campus for its good luck and neverending supply of liquor. No one knew that it was all the work of some friendly ghost. I just wanted everyone to have a good time!

The three guys I possessed didn't have the best time though.

Tyler woke up at some point with a splitting headache and no memory of all the twerking and flirting he'd done the night before. He did eventually hear stories, which left him feeling utterly humiliated. His teammates never let him live that one down.

I don't think the cop lost his job, but he was reprimanded for not reporting in after his shift. I think the officer was just glad none of his colleagues knew he'd woken up in the middle of a college party, his uniform soaked in alcohol and who knows what else!

That construction worker woke up just before his next shift. He was completely confused and hungover, but he stifled his worries and shuffled across the street. He was more than happy to just show up at work like nothing had happened.

I'm thinking about throwing another party next week. The Dean of the college has a pretty large house, and I'm sure his students would love to see me letting loose in his body...

[kurogane2512]

Y'all knew this was coming

Short drabble on Signora in her Harbinger coat cause I need her even more now 😩

Just fluff, mildly suggestive | can imagine any reader

Snezhnayan winters are no joke, especially when they happen all year round. Fortunately, the Fatui developed plenty of heating sources in this frigid country, including warm clothes. You had come to Zapolyarny Palace to pick up your partner, the 8th Harbinger, La Signora. It was a chilling evening as a snowstorm was forecasted for later, you hoped to get home as soon as possible.

"Lady Signora wishes to see you in her office." One of the guards informed you as you stood in the lobby area. You figured this meant she had more work and would take longer to come out. You nodded and went to her office as escorted by the guard, knocking the door before going in.

"Rosa?" You called out to her as you went in and saw her sitting at the table, diligently working on something.

"Ah, my love, you are here. Could you wait for a bit? I have something to show you."

"Of course."

You walked up to the sofa and took a seat, releasing a sigh and rubbing your palms together to generate some heat. The Palace was much warmer than outside, and Signora's office was sufficiently heated as well but you couldn't help but feel a little chilly. You looked around her office and found the cause of that, a window was slightly ajar. It wasn't wide open to freeze you and you figured Signora did not feel the cold air coming from there otherwise she would have closed it before you came.

You continued waiting and the chilly air coming from the window grew, you would have closed it but it was too tall for you to reach, only Signora could. Signora finally finished her work and stood up. She looked at you and noticed you shivering and rubbing your hands together, becoming worried at your state.

"My love, are you feeling cold?"

"Oh....Uh, a little bit. That window has been open...." you pointed to the window on her right and she gasped in shock.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't realize, the cleaners must have left it open...."

She quickly closed the window shut, but you were still shivering.

"Oh, by the way, what did you have to show me?" you asked her after standing up.

"Ah, I suppose it's the perfect opportunity for it~" she giggled and picked up a packet kept on the floor on her side of the table and called you nearby. You walked up to it and saw it was some kind of big coat, white and fluffy and adorned with various accessories.

"What is this, Rosa?"

She smirked and opened the packet to take out the coat, "A special coat gifted to all Harbingers by Her Majesty herself~"

She proudly announced as she took it out and opened it. It was quite a hefty garment with floor touching length, wide bell sleeves and a thick fur collar complete with chains and crystal accessories. Signora removed her cape and slipped on the coat, she did not cover herself completely and instead draped it stylishly with the collar falling down her shoulders and exposing her chest.

"Wow, it looks really good, Rosa! It suits you so much!" you complimented with a bright smile, making her smile in return.

"Thank you, my love. It is really well made; though, I don't see myself wearing it all the time since it's quite cumbersome to carry."

"Mhm, I can understand. Also, you don't really need a coat like this anyways. You don't feel cold, after all."

Signora smirked then stepped closer to you with the coat spread open as if to hug you, "Well, it may not be useful to me. But it is plenty useful for you~"

"W-Wait, me?! I would barely even fit in it!"

You exclaimed but Signora only came closer and wrapped her arms around you, draping the coat over you and embracing. A warm, protective layer was formed around you from the coat and Signora's own body. She was already taller than you and the coat englufed you completely even when she was wearing it; not to mention, you were as close as to lay your head on her soft bosom.

"Oh my, isn't this cozy?~" Signora mused and pulled your head further into her breasts, caressing your head and holding you close.

You blushed and lightly kept your hands on her waist and tried to relax; her intoxicating scent invaded your senses as you stood close, her perfume was a rich wine-like fragrance but there was a hint of sweet rose-like odor mixed in, likely from her body wash. It was a pleasant and bewitching aroma, one that made you relaxed as well as tipsy.

"Hmm, this coat would be rather useful I think~" Signora chuckled looking down at you, noting the way you were holding her and were practically lost in her. She then smiled and pulled the coat further around you and completely caged you in her arms, embracing you passionately before planting a kiss on your head.

[yourmomwhitediamond]

hi hi!

i was thinking maybe you could write something carmilla x reader? hear me out on this one, she seems to me like that kind of person to just wrap her hands around their partner wherever they are? like: a meeting? hand on leg. calm evening in the kitchen? hands around our waist. maybe it’s just me but carmilla in my head loves to just touch us showing who we belong to😭 and most of the time it’s not even in a sexual way just… because

anyway! have a good day/night darling!:)

Yes! Those big hands of hers would be the best for cuddling. Just one would cover half of someone's body! A super clingy overlord who's gotta make sure her gf is in her sight and safe at all times 🙏 (not in the unhealthy relationship way)

I write so many different versions of the requests I get, hence why it takes me so long. This is the one out of three I liked the most, so enjoy my dear!

Warnings: Slight mention of nsfw if you squint and just pure fluff!

Normally Carmilla would find you fast asleep or half awake in the warm comfort of her embrace. Yet sometimes you would slip out from her loving arms and get yourself ready for the day ahead before even she could wake. And it was one of those mornings today. With her eyes still shut tight she blindly reached out in search of your smaller figure. All her hands found was the cold empty side of your bed which made her huff.

"Morning sleepy head" You greeted, glancing at Carmilla through the mirror in front of you.

"Mi amor?" She propped herself up on her elbows groggily. After giving her tired eyes a rub she spotted you sitting at the vanity, styling your hair,"You left me"

You stifled a laugh, you wouldn't be surprised if she was pouting. Whilst you continued to comb through your hair and ignore her childish whine you heard the shuffling of bed sheets followed by footsteps. A moment later you looked up in the mirror, finding Carmilla standing over you. Her arms draped over your shoulders and her chin rested on the crown of your head.

"Carmilla" You sighed, lowering your comb. There was no way you could finish your hair with her head on yours.

"Yes?" She hummed and closed her eyes. Your body was pulled back flush up against her chest. Her entire body weight was being pressed onto you. No offence to her, but she was heavy, you could barely sit upright and by the looks of things she had no plans to get off of you. You were trapped, her hands had you imprisoned, covering your entire torso. Any other time you'd allow her to hold you like this, but unfortunately there wasn't much time for it. A meeting with the other overlords was due in an hour.

"We have a meeting" You remind her and she huffed. She was reluctant to let go, but after thinking things over she kissed you on the head and released you to go on about her morning routine. She made sure to display her displeasure with sighs, groans and slothful movements. Rather than feeling guilty, which was the whole point of this behaviour, it was rather comical. The scowl on her face was just so cute!

She made sure to hold you close as you went from your bedroom to the boardroom despite her grumpiness. You settled down in your dedicated seat and so did Carmilla, choosing the more comfortable alternative to walking back and forth. She was discreet with the way she touched you, wanting to maintain her professionalism as she presented. Her hand was on your knee at first, rubbing soft circles on it. Then she moved onto your thigh, ever so gently kneading it.

At this point, it was a subconscious action. You never went long without her touch. She always found excuses. Sometimes she didn't even need them.

You listened intently to her and savoured the physical affection you were receiving. Soon your hand crept down under the table and took Carmilla's hand, intertwining your fingers. You caught her lips twitching up from the corner of your eye, a sign you were doing something right. With her hand held you ran your thumb across her palm like you'd usually do when you were alone. You traced the patterns and dips of her skin, making sure to cover the large surface.

Her hands were one of your favourite features. They were large, soothing, warm and...very skilled. You gave every part of it the same amount of attention, not leaving a single bit untouched by the end of the meeting.

When she finally wrapped the meeting up and watched the door close behind the last attendee she swooped you from your seat. You squeaked in surprise, grasping onto Carmilla as she placed you on the desk.

"We have time to ourselves now, mi amor" She smiled, watching her hands roam your body.

They drifted up and down, from your shoulders to your thighs. You smiled in return and leaned into her neck to kiss it. Carmilla crooned at the sensation of your lips against her skin and titled her head, urging you to continue. It was difficult to believe she was an overlord when she was like this. Such a cuddly sinner beneath that tough facade of hers.

After being with her for some time you realised what the reason behind her being so touchy was. Turns out it brought her a great deal of comfort, knowing you were there and not too far out of reach, that you were safe and sound by her side. It was also a stress reliever if you will. It kept her mind clear of all negative thoughts and was a way to help her concentrate. She also found out you struggled with your words and that you replaced them with featherlight kisses as well as the odd few gifts here and there which she had no complaints about.

"You have such a beautiful body" She uttered, unable to remove her hands from you. She reminded you of this whenever she got the chance, especially if you were having self-doubts. She would cling to you, complimenting every part of you verbally and physically until you admitted it.

"Thank you" Your voice matched her level and hummed when you felt her hands in your hair. You let her touch you freely and melted into her arms, knowing you were in safe hands. There were no lewd intents. If there were she would've acted already, with your permission of course. But no. This spare time was used for fond, loving touches only.

The dividers I used are from @saradika

[yelena-bellova]

Twenty Years Later: Joel Miller x F!Reader - Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven: Hands

Plot: Y/n and Joel work to escape the ambush with their lives, sharing an unexpected tender moment after.

Word Count: 7.6k

Warnings: tlou ep.4 spoilers, language, graphic description of injuries, canon-typical violence, death, blood, guns, knives, insinuated a**ault, (16+)

A/N: THERE WAS ONE BED. Sorry, I’ve been waiting five days to say that. Anyway, this one was super fun to write. As always, this series is 16+ and I will not be tagging anyone unless your age is specified in your bio. Gotta look out for younger eyes 👀

Enjoy, and good luck to all going into tonight’s episode 🙏🏻

——————

June 6th, 2002. Austin Texas.

Summer in Texas brought a brutal heat, but once the sun set, it was bearable to a point of enjoyment.

Y/n’s fingers drummed anxiously against her steering wheel as she drove to the fairgrounds. If she’d been nervous about her first date with Joel, this was worse. If she couldn’t fit in with the family, there was no point in them going any further. The night had to go well.

She pulled into the dirt parking lot, taking a deep breath before switching off her car. Sarah and her had already gotten along when she’d driven her home. And Tommy already felt like an old friend. Everything would be fine…probably.

Tommy, Joel and Sarah waited at the front of the fair, the latter two peeking through the sea of people for one specific person.

“Can’t tell which one of you’s more excited,” Tommy chuckled, looking between his niece and brother.

“I’m excited,” Sarah replied, standing on her tiptoes to get a better look, “Dad’s nervous.”

“I am not nervous,” Joel stated, his fiddling thumbs over his pockets contradicting his words.

Before Tommy could get in a jab, the three of them spotted Y/n’s head bobbing through crowd. Sarah and Tommy waved wildly, Joel tried to keep his restrained.

“The yellow rose of Texas,” Tommy cheered, beating Joel to give her a hug.

Y/n laughed as Tommy spun her around. “Nice to see you too,” she grinned.

Sarah jumped forward, unable to contain her excitement any longer. “Hi, Y/n!”

“Hey,” Y/n greeted her, unsure whether or not she was supposed to hug her or if it was too much or-

Her excessive thoughts died in thin air as soon as her and Joel’s eyes met.

He sheepishly walked forward, hoping it didn’t seem like he wasn’t enthusiastic about her being there. He was just so fucking nervous.

“Dad,” Sarah piped up, “Doesn’t Y/n look pretty tonight?”

“Yeah,” Tommy added, taking Y/n’s hand and twirling her around, “Better make a move before she realizes she can do better.”

Joel nodded along, “Alright, alright,” he took Y/n’s hand, “Hi.”

“Hi,” she smiled, all her anxiety suddenly seemed worth it.

“Should we get this show on the road?” Tommy asked, slapping his hands together and pulling Sarah along with him.

Joel and Y/n’s fingers stayed interlocked as they walked in.

“She’s been bouncing off the walls all day,” he admitted, “Couldn’t wait to see you.”

Y/n forced a laugh, “You’re doing wonders for my anxiety…”

Joel laughed, sneaking a kiss to Y/n’s temple while his family’s backs were turned.

The night, however, ended up going better than either one of them expected. Sarah was glued to Y/n’s side all night, barely acknowledging her uncle or Joel. She insisted that Y/n sit with her on all the rides, even grabbing her hand on one of the coasters. Y/n made an effort in between attractions to find out Sarah’s interests, finding common ground in music mostly. Joel’s daughter was witty, smart and a downright joy to simply be around.

Joel watched the whole thing, his heart bursting with affection for them both. Under the glow of the carnival lights, he wasn’t sure what he had been so worried about. He had the two most incredible girls in his life and it was crazy to think they wouldn’t get along.

They’d walked nearly the entire fair before Sarah spotted the ferris wheel. “We haven’t done that one yet,” she said, “Y/n?”

“Well, if your dad’s recovered from the tilt-o-whirl,” Y/n shrugged, smiling smugly at Joel.

Joel pointed a finger at Y/n, “Don’t even mention that death contraption.”

The four of them made their way through the line, zigging and zagging. Somewhere along the way, Sarah drifted behind Joel and Y/n to walk alongside Tommy, forcing the two of them together. They filed up the steps and into the cart, expecting Tommy and Sarah to be right behind them.

“Oh,” Sarah put her hands to her stomach, “I’m not feeling great.”

Tommy grabbed his niece’s shoulders with great concern, “Oh, no. Maybe we should go sit you down.”

Joel, though already barred in his seat, tried to stand up. “Sarah, I-“

“You guys go ahead,” she waved her dad off, “I think I just need some water or something.”

“Well, no,” Y/n said, trying to push the bar up, “We can just-“

The wheel creaked to life and began to lift Y/n and Joel up into the air.

“Well, fuck,” Joel muttered, frantically looking around as if he could somehow stop it in motion, “I wonder if it’s somethin’ she ate.”

Y/n peered down, searching out Tommy and Sarah’s forms. She chuckled when she finally spotted them. “Something tells me she’ll live,” she tapped Joel on the shoulder and pointed downwards.

There, back in line for more greasy carnival food, was Sarah, nearly bouncing beside her uncle as they watched Y/n and Joel.

Joel threw his head back in relief and laughter, blindly seeking out Y/n’s hand.

“Your daughter might just be an evil genius,” Y/n smirked.

“She’s diabolical,” Joel replied, turning to face Y/n with a lovesick grin, “She loves you.”

Y/n folded her other hand over Joel’s, “She’s magic. Just pure sunshine.”

“No, I mean,” Joel sat up straighter, “She’s never taken to anyone like she has you. It’s just been us and Tommy her whole life and the way she’s accepted you is just…”

Neither one needed to say it, they could both feel it. Sarah had taken Y/n in like she’d always been there.

“I’m honored,” Y/n beamed.

Joel felt like he was locked in a tractor beam, Y/n’s eyes drawing him in further and further. The two of them startled when the ferris wheel creaked again and they stopped moving, having reached the top of their climb.

“So,” Y/n started, “Did I pass the Miller family test?”

Joel took the opportunity to wrap his arm around her shoulders, dragging her frame closer to him till they were pressed against one another. Y/n interlocked her fingers with his, her stomach nearly in her throat from the closeness.

Joel knew that the next seconds were crucial. If he kissed Y/n, he was signing away his future. There would never be another woman his eyes followed across the room. The room would empty as soon as she walked in. There would never be another first date, sweaty palms and racing heartbeat accompanying. The nerves would morph into different firsts, ones of far more significance. If he gave his heart fully to this woman, it would never again be his.

Joel rubbed a thumb against Y/n’s shoulder and smiled, “Flyin’ colors, Rosebud.”

Y/n was practically glowing, relief radiating out of her. She knew that Sarah was the final puzzle piece to her and Joel, and it had all come together gloriously. There were no more obstacles, there was only them.

Joel’s eyes flickered to Y/n’s lips, the signal that meant something beautiful was about to happen. She held firm, not wanting to move and upset the electricity of the moment. Joel’s head slowly drifted forward, his nose gently sliding against Y/n’s. She couldn’t hide her shaky exhale as their skin finally touched.

Joel allowed a few seconds, for the possibility of her backing out, before letting himself lean in fully and kiss her.

The pure relief that ran through their bodies paralyzed them, their lips pausing as if the commit the feeling to memory. The shock wore off and Y/n pushed her lips deeper against his, seeking out the second kiss. Joel met her, bringing his free hand up to hold her cheek in place. His fingers spread across the side of her face, two brushing against her jawline. It was nearly a lazy kiss, like they knew this was just the first of a million and they could take their time with it.

There, above a sea of noise that faded in their ears, Y/n and Joel felt their uncertainties turn to stone. They were each other’s future.

—————————

2023. Kansas City, Missouri.

The crash could have been worse.

“Ellie?” Y/n panted, reaching blindly behind her.

“I’m okay,” Ellie grabbed hold of Y/n’s arm.

“You’re not hurt, nothin?” Joel asked both of them, his eyes frantically scanning them for injuries.

Ellie shook her head, “I don’t think so.”

“Good,” Y/n confirmed, checking Joel’s face and hands for blood.

Inevitable gunshots began to hit the truck, sending them ducking for cover.

“Belts off,” Joel shouted, “Fast!”

They unbuckled and Ellie crawled out her side of the truck, Y/n and Joel following. Y/n had the good sense to grab her backpack as she slid out. They crouched down behind the truck, Joel reaching back in to grab Y/n and his shotguns.

One of their assailants called out to them, “Let’s see you, motherfucker! Give us your shit, you make it through this! I promise!”

A lie.

Y/n and Joel loaded their guns in preparation. They could fight, but Ellie couldn’t.

Joel spotted a hiding spot through the wall. “Hey,” he caught Ellie’s attention, “You see that hole? Can you squeeze through?”

A couple warning shots caused them all to flinch, Y/n throwing an arm over Ellie’s body instinctively.

“When I say go, you crawl through that wall,” Joel instructed, “And you squeeze through, and you don’t come out until we say, okay?”

A bullet flew through one of the truck’s windows, the shards of glass raining around them. Y/n was directly under its stream, her adrenaline blocked the feeling of the small cuts.

“And they’re not gonna hit you,” Joel kept going, Ellie was already turning in concern towards Y/n, “Look at me!”

“Ellie,” Y/n urged, “Listen to him.”

Ellie turned to Joel, he drove the promise home. “They’re not gonna hit you.”

Another bullet came too close for comfort.

“You stay down, you stay low, you stay quiet,” Joel instructed, trying to give her as much information as possible in an attempt to soothe her fears.

“Mm-hmm,” Ellie nodded, Y/n squeezed her hand for reassurance.

“Okay,” Joel said, looking over to Y/n. The two of them had to be perfectly in sync for the plan to work. Y/n gave a confidant nod and he returned it.

“GO!”

On cue, Ellie began to belly crawl across the floor while Y/n and Joel got to their feet. When one of them took a shot, the other would stay down. They timed their reloads so that someone was always up and firing.

While crouched behind the truck, Y/n glanced over at the hole in the wall, the only thing left visible was Ellie’s leg being pulled through.

“She’s in,” Y/n told Joel, popping up as he went down and firing a shot at one of their attackers.

Joel was making up their escape route on the fly, trying to find a place safe enough to take cover behind. “Come on,” he muttered, leading Y//n behind a large piece of equipment.

Y/n crouched beside Joel, her mind racing with grim possibilites as the crunching of glass came closer. Joel was the better shot, without question, but her fear for Ellie’s life made her much quicker to the trigger. Joel motioned for her to stay down, he would take the shot.

Waiting for their attacker to be in perfect position, Joel rose to his feet and fired a deadly bullet.

Joel exhaled, he’d been holding his breath as they’d lay in waiting. He offered Y/n a hand, which she took, and pulled her to her feet. He went to reload the shotgun, but it had become jammed.

A body burst through the door, barely leaving Joel and Y/n time to react. Joel smacked the butt of his gun into the assailant’s, the almost-fatal shot hitting the ceiling instead. Y/n backed up and took aim, but the man swung around and knocked the shotgun out of her hands. Joel was trying to draw him away from Y/n, but as she went to attack him, she was thrown into Joel and they were backed up against their shelter. They struggled against the man as he tried to shove his gun against their throats.

Even though there were two of them, he quickly overpowered them and pulled them to the floor. He pinned Y/n and Joel down, the rifle big enough to dig into both their throats.

“Now you’re gonna pay, motherfuckers,” he threatened, “What you fuckin’ did, you killed yourself, motherfucker!”

Y/n and Joel began to feel the oxygen drain from their lungs, both of them kicking wildly in a sad attempt to free themselves. The sounds of Y/n’s struggles cut right to Joel’s heart, making him fight harder.

Y/n tried with her remaining strength to push the gun away from them, but without her and Joel at their best, it was fruitless. She gagged, her eyesight was beginning to blur. Their journey couldn’t end here, not like this…

Desperately trying to comfort her in what was assuredly their last moment, Joel’s hand, that was barely brushing Y/n’s, fought to slide a finger over hers. If they were going out, they were going out together.

And then suddenly, the weight lifted from them. Y/n fell onto her side, Joel landing up against her with an arm resting against her convulsing abdomen. They sputtered for air, coughing and hacking as it refilled their chests. Y/n held onto Joel’s arm as she wheezed, gripping him for traction as she tried to draw a true breath.

Joel forced himself up onto his arm, turning around and seeing their salvation came in the form of Ellie and a pistol. He should have known that she wasn’t going to listen…

“No, no, no, no, no,” Joel and Y/n’s attacker cried as Ellie took a step towards him, “It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s over. We’re not fighting anymore.”

Finally gaining enough oxygen to see straight, Y/n leaned up, coming face to face with Ellie. Her heart broke at the sight of her, so young, having been forced to make an irreversible decision.

“I’m gonna go home,” the guilty promised, “I’ll tell everyone you’re good,” he began to cry, “I don’t know what to do. My legs don’t work.”

Joel’s protective arm remained around Y/n the whole time.

“My mom isn’t far,” the man continued to bargain for his life, “If you could get me to her.”

Y/n tapped Joel’s hand, shrugging his arm off as they got to their knees. Joel looked down at their hands, blood smeared on both their palms. The slow stream was coming from the back of Y/n’s hand, the spray of the truck’s glass window had cut her up good.

“We could trade with you guys,” the man tried to reason with a teary-eyed Ellie, “We could be friends. I didn’t know. I’m Bryan, I’m Bryan. What’s your name?”

Joel and Y/n helped each other up, steadying one another as they got to their feet. The sound of their assailant speaking, trying to be friendly to Ellie set Y/n off. She took a threatening step toward him, Joel had to hold her back by her hips.

They turned to Ellie, who looked like she was somewhere between relieved and tortured. Joel held out a hand, silently demanding the gun still shaking in her palm. She handed it over without hesitation.

Bryan had begun to weep behind them, as if that made any difference to the people whose lives he’d been ready to steal. Joel turned slowly, stuffing the gun in his jacket pocket and pulling out his own pistol.

“Wait, wait, wait,” Bryan sniffled, picking up the knife he would have most likely killed Y/n and Joel with and dropping it at their feet, “You can have it. It’s a good knife.”

Joel bent over to pick it up, turning to Ellie after. “Get behind the wall,” he growled.

“No, no, no, no,” Bryan cried, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please, please, we could just talk. I’m sorry! I’m-“

Ellie looked between him and Y/n, who nodded towards the hole as a back up to Joel’s order. Moving mechanically, Ellie hurried back through the hole to the others side of the building.

Bryan continued to beg for mercy, something Joel had been short on for twenty years. Y/n, usually the more reasonable of the two, stood over the sniffling young man, seething. He’d been ready to kill them like they were nothing. He’d have killed Ellie, or worse, taken her and allowed his friends to commit unspeakable acts to her. He didn’t deserve her forgiveness.

Joel didn’t bother asking Y/n for her opinion as he stalked forward. He ignored Bryan’s pleas, the shrieking cries for his mother. As he brought the knife down on him, Y/n turned away, desiring justice but unable to watch its delivery.

When it was over, Joel looked over to Y/n, who was turned towards the wall. He didn’t have time to feel any guilt over causing further damage to their past selves. He made his way over to her and took her hand into his, examining the bloody cuts.

“Window,” she choked out, pulling away from his touch, “I’ll clean it later.”

Joel nodded, there were no other options. “Ellie,” he called out, “We gotta get in there. We can’t fit through.”

“There’s some stuff against the door,” she replied.

“Well, can you move it?” Joel asked.

Y/n and Joel hurried around the back of the laundromat and to the side entrance to the building Ellie was hidden in. They leaned their collective weight against the door, the screech of a desk sliding on the other side. They burst through together, slamming the door shut after.

“Let’s go,” Joel hurried to help Ellie, “Fast.”

The three of them slid the desk back against the door, barricading themselves for the time being. It left them with nothing other than the reality of what happened sinking in on them.

“I’m okay,” Ellie was quick to say, reaching for her pack, “I’m good. I, uh, got some food in here still, and I got your light still.”

“What now?” Ellie asked.

“We go up,” Joel answered, already on the move.

“To get a better look?”

“Hopefully we spot a clear route out,” Joel opened the door that would lead them outside, “Stay close.”

Ellie nodded, “Got it.”

The three of them moved through the back room of the building, daylight greeting them as they found their way outside. Joel led them along the alley, finding cover behind an old car. They could hear the attacker’s calls for Bryan and the subsequent ones of terror when they found his body.

Joel cut across the street, shining his light through the opposite building’s door. Deeming it safe, he gestured for Y/n and Ellie to meet him. They ran through it, closing the door quietly behind them.

“Stairs?” Y/n asked, pulling out her pistol while Joel manned the flashlight.

Joel led them through the dark, the three of them flying up the steps in order to try and seek some vantage point. When they couldn’t find one, they headed back to the first level.

They snaked through holes, doors and carefully across streets, always avoiding whatever noise was just a few blocks over.

Eventually, they landed in a bar with newspapers plastered against the windows. It was the quietest street they’d found yet and safe for the time being. Joel monitored the city through the small chunk of exposed glass as sounds grew closer, watching as trucks and tanks rolled down the street.

Y/n was seated at the table, the first aid kid open and her hand stretched out. There were at least a dozen small shards of glass stuck in her skin, blood slowly trickling around them. It was going to be a bitch getting them out.

“They’re not FEDRA,” Ellie recounted the discussion they’d just had, “They’re not Fireflies. Who are they?”

“People,” Joel answered as he continued to watch.

“Are we okay in here?”

“Yeah, for now, but we gotta keep-“ Y/n’s gasp interrupted her sentence as she poured rubbing alcohol across the back of her hand. “We gotta keep moving,” she strained.

Joel’s attention was drawn away by Y/n’s cry of pain, but he made sure to look back through the window one more time. “Looks like they’re checkin’ out apartment buildings first. But they’ll be comin’ through these places soon enough.”

“So we zig when they zag,” Y/n stated, sanitizing her pair of tweezers.

Joel got up and Ellie took his spot at the window, he moved towards the table.

“There’s a really tall building, like, four blocks away,” Ellie reported.

“Yeah, saw it,” Joel replied.

“So that’s the one?” Ellie asked.

“As soon as we don’t hear a truck,” Joel said, “We move. Fast as we can.”

Joel came to sit across from Y/n, watching as she carefully began to pull pieces of glass from her skin. She was trying her best to hold back tears, her lip trembling as she bit down on it. His fingers practically twitched to help her, telling himself to hold back as much as he could.

Y/n’s hand began to shake as she reached for another shard, whimpering when she accidentally nudged it deeper into the cut.

“Here,” Joel offered, though it was more an order. He held out a hand for the tweezers.

“I’ve got it,” Y/n mumbled wetly, speaking past the lump in her throat.

“I know you do,” Joel replied softly, the softest tone he’d taken with her in twenty years. He looped his fingers through the vice-like grip she had on her tool, gently pulling it down to the table. “Here.”

Y/n was in too much pain to fight, and she knew Joel would get it done quick. She allowed him to take her injured hand into his, the sensation of his touch against her palm sending a jolt through them both.

Joel worked with precision, carefully pulling each shard out of each cut. Y/n would let out a small whine every once in a while, but he didn’t stop to look at her. The faster he moved, the faster her pain would end.

Y/n tried to focus on anything, anything other than the pain. That thing ended up being Joel’s hands. The rough callouses against her wrist, the occasional brush of his knuckle as he worked, the length of his fingers in comparison to hers. In the heat of misery, she couldn’t see what a dangerous place her mind was in. All she could see was Joel.

Once he was done, Joel collected the bloody shards in a piece of gauze and stuck them in the first aid kit. They couldn’t leave any trail. Y/n reached into the box and pulled out a bandage roll. Joel placed a large gauze pad over the back of her hand and unrolled the spool. He pulled Y/n’s hand closer to him across the table, lifting it up as he wrapped it in the material. He handled her with all the delicacy he could muster.

Y/n watched him wrap her hand, thinking of the last time he’d been this soft with her. For as rough around the edges as Joel had always been, there was a tenderness that had only ever been reserved for her and Sarah. To feel it again was to travel twenty years into the past, to feel their fingers intertwine as they laid in bed or walked down the street…

She almost forgot about her anger, just for a moment.

Joel secured the bandage and gently set her hand back on the table. They peered up at one another, the cautious look in their eyes saying more than their lips ever could.

“Thank you,” Y/n muttered.

Joel simply nodded, retracting his hands back into his sides. Reintroducing the feel of Y/n’s skin was dangerous, muscle memory was sure to seek out and seek more and more of it. He balled up his fists and set them in his lap.

Settled, Y/n glanced over at Ellie, who was seated against the wall with her knees to her chest. With a minute of calm on their side, they were all trying to deal with what had happened after the crash.

“Are you guys okay?” Ellie asked.

Y/n held up her bandaged hand, one side of her mouth twitching upwards.

“I’m all right,” Joel answered, looking anywhere but at Ellie as he struggled, “Are you…all right?”

“Yeah,” Ellie mumbled quickly.

Joel fiddled with his hand, there was a duality to him he didn’t know how to properly function out of. Twenty years of burying your feelings could leave you severely impaired by the time you needed to access them again.

“Thing is, I didn’t hear that guy comin’,” he sighed.

“Neither of us did,” Y/n looked up, her and Joel’s eyes meeting again in mutual guilt.

Joel turned back to Ellie, “You shouldn’t have had to…you know.”

“Well, you’re glad I did, right?” Ellie asked, needing reassurance that she’d done the right thing.

Good and bad were so muddled, post-pandemic. Y/n was glad she’d kept her life, but it came at the expense of another piece of Ellie’s innocence. What was she supposed to say?

“Thing is, you’re just a kid,” Joel said for the both of them, “You shouldn’t know what it means to…” he diverted his eyes, desperately searching for the magic words to make her feel any better, “It’s not like you killed him. But shootin’ or…” he sighed, “I know what it’s like, first time that you, uh, hurt someone like that.”

Y/n stayed quiet, unable to watch Joel’s painful attempt. She knew the moment he was referring to, and it hadn’t been the dick in the bar all those years ago.

“If you, uh,” Joel tried, stuttering on consonants after, “I’m not good at this.”

“Yeah,” Ellie numbly agreed, “You really aren’t.”

“I mean it was my fault,” Joel rushed out, glancing over to Y/n, “Our fault. You shouldn’t have had to,” he made sure to look in Ellie’s eyes, “And I’m sorry.”

“I am too,” Y/n added, her throat nearly clogging up.

Ellie soaked in their words, hurriedly wiping away at the tears welling in her eyes. It only made Joel and Y/n feel worse about their mistake.

“It wasn’t my first time,” Ellie spoke up, not looking in either of their directions.

While they were both emotionally guarded, Y/n was the more available between her and Joel. Her heart still beat for those in need. She got up from the table and came to Ellie, sliding down the wall until she was sitting next to her. She didn’t reach out, she just wanted Ellie to know that she wasn’t alone.

Joel’s way of showing he cared bled through in the way he protected. If he could ensure his people were safe, he could breathe easier.

He got down on his knees in front of Ellie, unloading her pistol from his pocket and handing it back to her.

“Show me your grip,” he said, “Finger off the trigger.”

Ellie held up the gun, barely concealing her joy at finally getting to learn.

“Now who taught you that?” Joel asked.

“FEDRA school,” she answered.

“Figures,” he muttered, Y/n scoffed alongside him. He maneuvered Ellie’s fingers, “Your thumb over your thumb. Left hand squeezes down on the right.”

Y/n reached out with her good hand, tucking one of Ellie’s stray fingers in. “Pinkies in,” she smirked, “There’s no princesses here.”

“There you go,” Joel sat back, “Look it.”

He tugged on the gun, trying to pull the gun from Ellie’s grip, but it held. She giggled as he yanked her forward.

“Okay?” Joel said sternly.

Ellie nodded, a smile still painted across her face.

Joel loaded the cartridge back into the weapon and safely handed it back to Ellie, who went to stuff it in her pocket.

“Uh-uh,” Joel shook his head, “You put it in your pack. You’ll shoot your damn ass off.”

Y/n turned her head away and snickered, still not wanting to give Joel the satisfaction of getting a laugh out of her. Joel got to his feet and extended a hand out to her. Y/n begrudgingly took it and let him pull her up.

Noting that outside had gone quiet, Joel nodded towards the door. Him and Y/n headed over and began ripping off the rotten wood boards nailed over the entrance. They had one clean shot at the high rise, they couldn’t make any missteps.

They paused when Ellie approached, both of them wanting her to trust that they’d get her to safety.

“We’re gonna be okay,” Y/n said, trying to make herself believe it too.

“I know,” Ellie muttered, the levity of the past moment having disappeared.

Joel and Y/n’s gazes met, neither one sure of what there was to say. They were developing their language through their silence, the nail biting seconds between safety and risking their lives. It was a level they had never connected on, because there had never been a need.

“Let’s go,” Y/n said softly.

Inhaling, Joel opened the door and they filed out into the empty street, bolting for the building they hoped would shelter them…

—————————

The journey to the high rise didn’t go as easy as they’d hoped, having to dip and duck into abandoned shops and restaurants. With the dark having blanketed them on the way, their arrival felt like an even bigger win when they got there.

There was the small task of getting in to the building.

Joel, Ellie and Y/n stared up at the vent that would grant them access to unlock the door.

“Alright, short stack,” Y/n announced to Ellie, “You’re up.”

Ellie, eager to be a part in any way she could, stepped forward. Joel nabbed a loose piece of wood resting against the wall and handed it to her.

“We’ll brace you,” Joel said, “Be careful going through, could be a long drop.”

“Got it,” Ellie nodded.

Joel bent down, locking his hands together. “You’re just gonna put your foot there,” he instructed.

“Okay,” Ellie breathed. Y/n was standing by, waiting to be needed.

“One, two,” Joel counted before lifting Ellie up.

“Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit,” the girl said, panicked. Y/n jumped in and steadied her hips.

“Straighten up,” Joel directed, “I got you.”

Ellie stiffened her body, getting traction in the safety of Y/n and Joel’s arms, and rammed the wood into the vent. It clattered to the building’s floor. Joel and Y/n helped thread her through the hole, dusting off their hands after.

“Okay, I’m in,” Ellie called.

“Take a look around first,” Joel told her, the sound of her sneakers hitting the floor defiantly, “Ellie!”

“Come on,” Y/n grumbled, following the clattering noises Ellie made straight to the door. It swung open.

“Where would you be without me, huh?” Ellie asked proudly.

“By now, Wyoming,” Joel replied as he and Y/n walked through.

“Oh, yeah,” Ellie admitted, “Walked into that one.”

They carefully made their way through the mess-ridden building, it looked like it had once been a loading dock. A stray car, multiple signs on the walls with instructions and packing materials scattered across the floor.

“All right, we’ll make our way up,” Joel laid out the plan, “And come morning, I’ll take a look at the city and find our way out.”

Y/n walked ahead and pushed open the door that led to the stairs, Joel shining his light behind her.

“We’re going up 42 flights?” Ellie asked.

“45,” Joel answered, flicking the light upward to reveal the dauntingly tall structure, “But no, not all the way.”

“How far then?” Y/n asked.

Joel heavily sighed, “As far as I can make it.”

Ellie laughed while Y/n rolled her eyes, their fate was to be determined by Joel’s knees.

The cockiness should have been saved for later, or ignored entirely.

After the tenth flight, Y/n was huffing and puffing along with Joel. Years of fighting and manual labor hadn’t been kind to either of them, but the day’s exhausting circumstances weren’t helping.

“Not so easy, is it?” Joel quipped, following Y/n’s panting, hunched over form.

“Fuck…” Y/n drew a deep breath as she turned another corner, “You…Miller.”

“Hey, you know that guy who said he was hurt?” Ellie asked, changing the subject, “How did you guys know it was an ambush?”

Joel and Y/n paused on their respective steps, feeling weight drop on them for different reasons.

“I can’t speak for him,” Y/n answered, drawing a breath, “But when I made my way up to Boston, there were all sorts of people trying all sorts of things. Stories get through the QZ too. People saying that they lost loved ones to raiders…” Y/n shook her head, “It’s a fucking disgusting business.”

Joel almost grimaced, resting against the railing. How the hell was he supposed to answer now?

“I’ve been on both sides,” he admitted, “It was a long time ago, we did what we needed to survive.”

“You and Tess?” Ellie asked.

“And the people we were with,” Joel continued, not knowing which bit of what he was about to say would affect Y/n more, “My brother, too.”

Y/n was braced against the railing, gripping the bar so tight she knew her knuckles were white. Joel was different now, a completely transformed man from the one she’d known. She had watched him kill, torture and separate entirely from his heart. But much like when he beat up the FEDRA guard back in the QZ, there was a part of her that didn’t want to believe the man she’d loved was fully gone.

Maybe it was inevitable. Maybe no one could stay pure in a world of bloodshed.

“Did you kill innocent people?”

Ellie’s question gave Y/n the burst of energy she needed to get up the next flight of stairs and she fled the conversation

The thing about knowing someone better than you know yourself is that the connection is forever. No matter how many changes either person goes through, no matter how much life beats them down and time rusts them…there are inherent pieces of their personality that remain the same. In each footstep that carried Y/n up the stairs, Joel felt the shame of his past choices ache a little more inside his soul. Somewhere, six layers underneath her bitterness, lay the heart of a woman who wouldn’t naturally hurt a fly. And here he was, having undergone a hideous transformation that could have given fairytales a run for their money.

If Y/n was a gentle sweep of rain, Joel was a hurricane, bringing death and destruction wherever he went.

“C’mon,” he said to Ellie, the only answer he could manage.

They climbed a little longer before Joel called out to Y/n, one flight above them. “Stop.”

Y/n paused, reluctantly descending to meet them where they were. Joel opened the door to their designated floor, out of breath and willpower.

“Holy shit,” Ellie breathed, short on oxygen, but better than Y/n or Joel.

Joel backed up against the wall, sliding down to the floor in exhaustion. “Yeah.”

“Thirty three floors,” Ellie continued cheerily, “That’s good.”

Y/n was bent over, bracing herself against her knees as she tried to catch her breath.

“It’s gonna have to be,” Joel panted.

Ellie extended a hand to him, “Come on.”

“Gimme a minute,” he complained, he wasn’t even sure he could move.

Ellie wasn’t having any of it, she knew what would motivate Joel. “Get up, you lazy ass.”

Y/n snorted, earning a glare from Joel. She didn’t shy away from staring back at him.

Joel reached up and took Ellie’s outstretched palm, “Lazy ass,” he grumbled, walking past both girls, “Fifty six years old, you little shit.”

Ellie laughed, Y/n patting her on the back as she walked past.

Joel grabbed a fire extinguisher from the wall and rammed it into the glass door of one of the apartments. He let Y/n and Ellie in first before entering himself.

“Oh, sweet,” Ellie exclaimed, dropping her backpack in the middle of the room, “There’s a couch.”

“Hallelujah,” Y/n replied, setting her bag down as well, while Ellie began rounding up the cushions.

Joel pulled out a drawer form one of the cabinets, carefully collecting the glass shards he’d created and shaking them across the floor. Y/n acknowledged it was a good idea, a makeshift alarm system, while she helped Ellie build their beds.

“Joel,” Ellie called, confused as to what she was watching. He didn’t reply. “Joel…”

Y/n spoke up, “Joel.”

He turned quickly, “What?”

“What are you doing?” Ellie asked.

“I don’t want someone sneakin’ up on us while we’re sleepin’,” he explained.

“Oh,” Ellie elongated, “I get it. Crunch, crunch, crunch. Are you sure you’re gonna hear it?”

“Of course I’ll hear it,” Joel replied, impatiently, “That’s the damn point.”

“Okay,” Ellie said, laying down on her couch cushion bed.

The dilemma Y/n faced was simple: two beds, three people. The easiest thing was to share with Ellie, which she was on her way to do when Ellie starfished, blocking any extra room she had.

“Come on,” Y/n urged, nudging the bottom cushion with her boot, “I’m exhausted.”

“There’s a perfectly good bed over there,” she nodded towards Joel’s section of the floor.

The ex-lover’s eyes met, panic in their gazes.

“Absolutely not,” Y/n stated, turning back to Ellie.

“Why?” Ellie replied, faux innocence in her tone and a smirk on her face, “Shouldn’t be a problem if you two are getting along.”

Every part of Y/n’s body wanted to jump through the apartment’s window and take her chances leaping to her death. Anything was preferable to sharing a bed with Joel again.

Joel felt the same way, he didn’t need to feel any more confused around Y/n than he already was. Laying beside her again would just be another punishment from some higher power.

“I’ll take the floor,” Joel reluctantly offered.

“What, so we have to listen to you complain about your back all day?” Y/n replied, “No, I’ll take the floor.”

“You’re gonna be fuckin’ miserable if you do,” Joel brought up, “And you’ll slow us down.”

Y/n paused, taking a deep breath, trying to get over herself enough to realize Joel was right. They both needed rest.

“Fine,” she conceded, “Back to back.”

Joel nodded, the two of them kneeling down beside the cushions and balling up their jackets.

It was an awkawrd dance, trying to maneuver themselves onto the narrow bed without touching too much. Y/n had to wiggle around, clinging to the edge of the cushion so she wouldn’t fall off. Inevitably, the entirety of their bodies ended up pressed together like magazine pages. Twenty years ago, it was the moment where one of them would flip over and wrap their arms around the other as they drifted off to sleep. Now, they lay stiff as boards, trying not to set off any memories or sensations.

“Well, goodnight,” Ellie said, comfortably curled up in a ball.

“Yeah, goodnight,” Joel grunted.

“Goodnight,” Y/n was facing Ellie and her smirk, “You little shit.”

Joel shut his eyes, trying to force himself to fall asleep quickly. But there was an unfinished part of his day that he couldn’t let go of.

“Ellie,” he called.

“Yeah?”

“When we were talkin’ about hurtin’ people,” he recalled, “What did you mean it wasn’t your first time?”

Ellie stiffened, rolling over onto her back, “I don’t wanna talk about it.”

Y/n watched the girl’s countenance change, for as much as they’d gotten to know each other the last few weeks, they didn’t actually know anything. There was blood on both their hands and Ellie wanted the dark of night to hide hers. Y/n couldn’t blame her.

“All right,” Joel conceded, only for a second, before rolling over on his other side. Y/n could feel him shift and knew he was trying to face Ellie. She flipped onto her back so he could see across the room.

“You don’t have to,” Joel continued, trying to keep his body as compact as possible, “Just sayin’…it isn’t fair, your age…havin’ to deal with all this.”

Y/n tried to steady her inhale, Joel’s warm breath fanned over her face, setting her nerve endings alight. The window idea was looking better and better…

Ellie turned her head to face the adults, “So it gets easier when you get older?”

“It never gets easier,” Y/n spoke up, attempting to release some of the pressure inside her from her own sins, “It just…you shouldn’t have to deal with this stuff yet.”

Joel’s eyes traveled over Y/n’s face, seeing all the pieces of her he couldn’t recognize. There were two decades of her life he had been absent for. Just as he carried stories and scars earned over time, she did too. It still hurt to see her hurt.

“The reason I asked whether you’d hear the glass or not,” Ellie flipped over to face Joel and Y/n, “Is ‘cause I’ve noticed you don’t hear too well from your right side. Is it cause you were shot there?”

Y/n twisted her head to get a look at Joel’s ear. She’s gathered enough information to make an educated guess, but years of fighting had taught her that it took more than one bullet to take out someone’s hearing.

Joel glanced down at Y/n, their breaths mingling in the small space left between them. It would have been so easy to lean down, or even just touch her cheek. Such intimacies belonged in their past life, but Joel could feel his resolve slipping with each second he spent in bed with her.

Y/n felt the draw too. She felt weak for admitting that through her anger, she was still as drawn to Joel as she had been the night they’d met. He may have changed in every way conceivable, but with the small taste she was getting of his body, she knew his firm frame was the same as she remembered. Something about that tortured Y/n more than if he’d completely transformed.

They were wading in dangerous waters.

“Probably more from shootin’,” Joel answered, swallowing hard and turning back over on his side, “So if you wanna keep your hearin’, you stick to that knife.”

The action of moving brought Y/n out of whatever trance she’d been in. She felt fucking weak, feeling any sort of attraction to the man who’d broken her heart. Rolling back onto her side, she shut her eyes and tried to calm her body down.

“Joel,” Ellie said softly, “Y/n.”

They answered at the same time, “Hm?”

“Did you know diarrhea is hereditary?”

Y/n carefully moved the sleeve of her jacket to block her twitching mouth.

Joel barely turned over, “What?”

“Yeah,” Ellie replied, “It runs in your jeans.”

He twisted to get a look at Ellie, who was smirking at them both, and fell back onto his side.

Y/n was desperately trying to contain her giggling, practically holding her breath.

Facing away from them, Joel smirked and muttered something to himself. A whisper of a chortle escaped him. “That is so damn stupid,” he admonished.

“You laughed, motherfucker,” Ellie giggled.

“I didn’t laugh,” Joel shot back.

“Yes, you did,” Ellie replied.

“I’m losin’ it.”

“You’re losin’ it big time,” Ellie grinned.

Y/n snorted, unable to hold it in any longer.

“I knew it would work again,” Ellie exclaimed, lording the two-time award winning joke over Y/n’s head. It was the only one in the book that got her to crack.

“It’s so fucking stupid,” Y/n laughed, digging her entire face into her jacket.

All it took was hearing the sweet melody again, and Joel was pushed over the edge. He had been on pins and needles since meeting her again, naturally waiting to hear Y/n laugh again. In their life, circumstances didn’t occur often that gave you the opportunity to find humor. He’d accepted he may never hear it again. And now, with her back shaking against his, he couldn’t stop himself from joining in.

As soon as Joel’s shakes being to reverberate off her body, Y/n felt a wave of grief and relief come over her. To hear his giggles, a sound only she’d ever been privy to, felt like coming home after a long day. She wanted to fight it, to rage against all pleasant memories of him, but she wanted a moment of peace more. She wanted to laugh.

Ellie was the loudest of them all, reigning victorious over Joel and Y/n’s stubbornness. It was so needed after the day they’d had.

“Go to sleep,” Joel said, his chuckle contradicting his order.

“You go to sleep,” Ellie laughed, rolling on her bed.

“Both of you go to sleep,” Y/n snorted, her voice lighting up the darkest parts of Joel.

There were two more rounds of giggling, one started by Ellie and one by Y/n. Joel couldn’t stop from joining both. It was the first moment of joy, true joy, that he’d felt in twenty years.

——————

At some point in their sleep, Y/n and Joel inevitably turned over. Y/n had been keeping her hands close to her chest, cradling the injured one. And somewhere in the timeline of the evening, Joel had unconsciously reached over and placed one of his hands over them both. How he blindly found it, how he knew she was trying to protect it, those answers belonged to the blanket of night. But Joel’s fingers wrapped around her bloody fist, protecting her even in his sleep.

He had also rolled over on his good ear.

“Y/n…Y/n.”

Y/n jumped at the call of her name, looking down at her and Joel’s intertwined hands and pulling back. She twisted onto her back, jumping back at the sight of the child standing over her, pointing a gun at them. Her peripheral vision caught Ellie with her hands up in surrender and a man with his own weapon aimed at her.

“Joel,” Y/n raised her hands, kicking her ex in the shin, “Joel!”

He startled awake.

——————

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[matrixbearer2024]

okay hear me out

vox accidentally slips and talks about angel dust like super indirectly he goes like:

Blah blah blah I had a super bad day blah blah blah fuck my life blah blah blah cause val is pissed cause one of his whores- angel I think tried to stand up to him and blah blah blah

and reader is like

wait wait wait ‘tried to stand up to him’? What do u mean? and vox is like trying to make the situation seem not as bad as it looks (he fails epically) and reader gets mad cause how could vox just let his coworker hit his employees??

Muddled Morality

Vox x CollegeStudent!Reader

A/N: Vox ranting and Reader nearly tearing him a new one- I love their dynamic and it's actually really funny for me to write our dear (Y/N)'s on-off confused attraction to the bipedal flatscreen. Like it's so evident that they love this man, but at the same time he does something so stupid it totally shatters the rose-tinted filter he'd got going on. They're already running around in circles at this point with Mr TV head's hesitation to act on his emotions and Reader's absolute obliviousness.

A/N: It gets a little angsty towards the end but they'll be okay soon- I feel like this was just another reality check Vox needed to hear from Reader who wasn't really gonna let his shit slide lmao- anyway, I hope you guys enjoy! As always, happy reading!

Providing the tech overlord with some much needed care was one thing-

But you didn't ever pin him to be a heavy sleeper.

Until now that is.

"Vox. Vox. Wake up. Vox."

You sighed when he made a noise similar to a whine and his arms tightened around you slightly.

You'd be lucky to get out of this now without prying him off you.

Your cuddling session was going extremely well and dandy compared to what you had expected.

It just so happened that after a while, your legs were predictably going numb for staying in the same position for too long.

Not to mention that you were hungry.

"Vooooox. Get uuuuup."

You started to poke at his screen repeatedly when he still didn't react, not caring if it left fingerprints or any marks on the glass.

He deserved it for being so difficult to wake up-

When his screen finally lit up once again to show his face, it kind of took a moment for the overlord to process what was happening.

Especially when he just stared at you wide-eyed and confused before all of a sudden tactlessly shoving you off his lap.

"HEY- WHAT THE HELL DUDE!"

So say he'd gone completely autopilot was probably the understatement of the century.

Vox could barely piece any coherent thoughts together when he noticed what position the both of you were in.

It was way too intimate to merely be friendly in his opinion.

And he didn't even know for how long you both were cuddled up like that.

God could his heart just calm the fuck down?!

You gave up yelling at the overlord when you realized he was kind of spacing out.

He refused to even look at you, just pointedly staring at the floor which for whatever reason seemed more interesting at the time.

What the hell was his problem?!

"A freakin 'thank you' would've been enough you know. Either way, I'm gonna go get something to eat. Do you want anything?"

You rolled your eyes when the overlord just shook his head, you'll bring up some food later for him anyway just in case.

When the door finally shut and you had left-

Vox quickly got up from where he was sitting and started pacing around the room.

He just fell asleep on you right?

It was that and nothing else.

You just comforted him after a stressful day-

That was it.

Just very close and very platonic and friendly cuddling-

"Why, I didn't think you would simply sneak in old chap! That's quite improper of you!"

"YOU MOTHERFUCKING-"

Alastor simply laughed when his rival nearly jumped a foot in the air from his arrival.

It was entertaining seeing the ridiculous picturebox struggle with emotions, all the more when it seemed you were involved in it!

He could easily manipulate you both for entertainment and none would be the wiser.

Besides, struggling with feelings?

They weren't children anymore.

How immature!

"What do you want?"

"Oh I was just checking around the hotel as per usual. By the way, (Y/N) didn't seem to be in the bestest of moods during dinner today. Did you perchance have any part to play in that?"

The radio demon only grinned wider when he saw Vox's expression falter slightly.

Was all that irritation towards him simply for bravado?

This was quite an entertaining exchange indeed!

"Oh fuck off, that's none of your business."

"But it is old friend! I try to ensure the happiness of everyone in the hotel, including your darling dear!"

The flatscreen overlord could see through the bullshit already, but his irritation was already bubbling over into rage.

Alastor just had to get on his nerves as always.

"Don't call them that!"

Vox didn't know why he yelled that retort of all things.

True, he called you a multitude of similar petnames anyway-

But to call you his?

That was just a flat out lie.

And he didn't dare to fool himself into believing it.

"Call them what? Don't tell me a simple nickname is winding you up."

"Quit it Al. I didn't leave Vox alone just so you could come in and antagonize him."

Both overlords suddenly looked to you leaning against the doorframe of your room.

They hadn't noticed your presence in their increasingly heated back and forth.

While you were still a little irritated with your techno companion for ignoring you earlier, you found bigger issues with Alastor just snooping in your room.

Who knows what he could've been doing.

"Charlie's looking for you. So could you kindly get the hell out of my room?"

Alastor merely laughed at your grumpiness, waving you off with his signature grin as he melted back into the shadows.

He had enough playing with you both today, maybe another time.

"Little princess Morningstar isn't really looking for him is she?"

"Nope. But he's definitely one creepy fucker and I wanted him out.

Vox would've laughed at your response if he still didn't feel so awkward.

He just couldn't stop thinking too deeply into the situation you were both in earlier.

"Wanna talk about what happened today? You just zonked out on me a while ago. I didn't think you'd be that tired."

You didn't seem to find any issue with anything though, sitting atop your bed and patting a spot next to you.

And people say he's dense-

"It's been an eventful day, in all the worst possible ways."

Your flatscreen companion eventually sat down next to you and sighed.

He was just overthinking everything.

Might as well try and stay distracted.

"Ah. Valentino again?"

"Hah, if only."

You simply listened to Vox as he went on and ranted about his day.

You were astounded to hear about so many things going wrong in quick succession.

It's like Murphy's law had somehow slapped your techno friend in the face.

'Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.'

Yeah, that seemed pretty accurate.

"Then he stormed my earlier broadcast throwing a fit and bitching about Angel trying to stand up to him-"

Okay, wait.

Hold the fucking phone.

"What do you mean 'trying'?"

Vox's ranting immediately hit the brakes at your question.

He really shouldn't have mentioned that-

Or at least worded it a little differently.

How was he going to explain this to you???

"Doll, you know I mentioned Val doesn't like it when his employees dish out some attitude-"

"And you also mentioned he can be a huge piece of shit. Angel wouldn't lash out unless he was provoked."

You practically had the overlord cornered, your serious gaze was making him squirm.

It was totally different from the gentleness you'd graced him with earlier.

"Vox."

He'd never heard you mention his name that sternly before.

In fact, you were even starting to look a little angry.

Shit.

"(Y/N), what ever happens in the studio is none of my concern-"

"So Angel can't even save himself if Valentino decides to be an abhorrent bastard for the day?! Don't you have fucking cameras everywhere?!"

It was either your words or your pained tone struck a cord in the overlord.

You knew, it was in the way his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes narrowed.

He was attempting to do damage control, and you were just not having it.

"You know, he comes back covered in bruises after those shoots sometimes. As far as I'm concerned despite being a pornstar he's really not supposed to!"

Vox didn't know what was genuinely worse.

The fact he'd unintentionally upset you because of his actions-

Or the fact you cared so much about Angel Dust.

He'd never felt any remorse towards the spider back then, only growing annoyed with him for taking so much of Valentino's attention away.

Even now, despite visiting the hotel and getting to know the others better because of you-

He still didn't bother understanding or even sympathizing with anyone's situation aside from you or himself.

He didn't need to.

Then again, was there even a need to at the start with you?

"Why- just- FUCK! Why can't you fucking care Vox?! Why is it just me?!"

It's because I love you.

The overlord merely scowled at you lecturing him.

Those few words he couldn't bring himself to say.

The courage had quickly evaporated when you grew upset at his nonchalance.

Right.

He didn't care.

And still you were the exception.

His guilt only grew when seeing the pain in your eyes.

Vox knew you made friends with most of the hotel's residents.

Save a certain radio demon-

But he wasn't aware to what extent you cared.

You really were too good for him.

Too good to be down here in hell even.

You only grew more irritated at your companion's silence.

Returning his glare with your own as your hands were furiously balled at your sides.

It took all your focus not to start hitting and swinging at his flatscreen head.

Well, he deserved it-

And still you chose not to.

It wasn't like you hated the special treatment from Vox-

Hell, it was flattering and even outright cute sometimes.

But the fact he could so easily turn a blind eye to some issues he had the power to stop-

You wanted to beat some common sense and human decency into this idiot.

The two of you sat in silence for a while until Vox suddenly got up and headed to the window.

You were about to scoff at him running away from the situation until he spoke.

"I'll see what I can do. But I make no promises."

You didn't see his face but his voice was barely above a whisper.

The overlord's tone wavering and uncertain but masked with irritation.

Not that you had any time to reply when your friend was abruptly gone in a bolt of blue electricity.

Possibly already well on his way back to the tower to care for his hellish empire.

Neither of you ever had an argument this explosive since you were alive.

And even then it was because of something stupid you couldn't remember.

But it wasn't so different compared to now.

So why was your heart aching unbearably-?

You shook your head and stormed out of your room.

Fuck it.

You needed a drink.

[zeewritez]

The Sailor and The Samurai - I

Mizu x Femme Shipmate/Pirate Reader

Hi my lovelies! I haven't updated in so long and I'm sorry but college has been kicking my ass. (Why tf am I studying biochemistry - because I hate myself). Anyways, I hope to update my other stories soon (I've had chapters for months now, they just need to be edited lol). So for now, here's a little BES fic because I'm in love with this show :)

(Notes: Reader's father is Irish in the fic but she will not be described physically except for having super long curly hair because I like projecting my hair goals onto stories, also I will be using he/him pronouns for Mizu since they are currently being perceived as a man.)

Part 2 now out

Y/n woke up with a splitting headache from the rum she had the previous night. She made a note to self to not attempt to out drink her father, even if he was pushing 60. Rolling out of her cot, she slipped on a blouse and trousers she had acquired from a crew mate at some point. They barely fit, but it was far better than the dresses and corsets she wore whenever they docked back home.

She walked onto the deck just in time to watch over the vast ocean as they approached the isolated island of Japan. She'd been there many times in her career but had only ever been to the ports to assist with loading goods when the crew needed it. Today, there was no need. Instead, she watched with mild curiosity from the crow's nest as crates were loaded onto The Banshee.

The cargo seemed standard: silks, swords, exotic fish. The things nobles in England dreweld over. Yet the passengers were anything but standard. Y/n could barely believe her eyes when the infamous Abijah Fowler was brought on board with guards on each side of him. He was brought to the detention cell, which would have otherwise been used when her father was tired of a crewmate's drunken antics.

Y/n was so taken aback by Fowler's presence she nearly missed the passenger behind him: a young man, a few years older than y/n herself, clad in Japanese garb and yellow glasses. It seemed odd to her, as it was rather overcast outside but she didn't give it a second thought. What she was truly curious about was why Abijah Fowler was on their vessel.

As the ship took sail, she climbed down from the nest and made her way to the detention cell with a curious, if not mischievous, grin.

"I never thought you'd be joining us for London," she teased as she stood outside of his cel, as though dangling her freedom like a carrot. She did not like Fowler one bit, but she found him almost as amusing as she found him vile. Entertainment was hard to come by at sea, so who could really blame her?

"Well I for one am always happy to see you," he said, grabbing her hand through the bars and kissing her knuckles. She rolled her eyes as she pulled her hand back from him.

"What brings you back to the isle?" she asked. "My father doesn't even enjoy England, and he's still in good standing, legally speaking."

"Perhaps he's a better Irishman then me," Fowler said with a shrug. "What does it matter to you?"

The girl looked up in faux innocence. "Oh, I'm just curious."

"Well, why don't you hunt down the samurai that's on board and he can let you know why I'm going back to London," Fowler finally told her. "You've picked up quite a bit of Japanese, haven't ya?"

"Alright, I'll see you around then," she said as she turned to leave.

"You have your mother's rear!" He shouted out, as though y/n had forgotten why she had disliked the man so much. She said a silent prayer thanking the heavens he wasn't roaming freely as she roamed the ship looking for the mysterious man with glasses, which was simple enough.

He stood on the poop deck, staring out onto the ocean, as anyone who has ever treaded water has. The waters had a way of commanding one's attention.

"Hello good sir," the young woman greeted she climbed the stairs, stopping to curtsey out of habit. She'd managed to have some resemblance of good manners despite being raised at sea by a captain with a drinking habit.

The young man stared at her, which was a common response from many men upon seeing her for the first time, regardless of national origin. In fact, Englishmen seemed most taken aback by her appearance. Her hair was long and unkempt, falling down her back in ringlets instead of being pinned into an updo of a proper lady. Her shirt nearly fell from her shoulders and around her neck was a long, beaded necklace that seemed to trail down between her breasts. Y/n giggled at the man's reaction, having expected nothing less.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he spoke casting his eyes away from her eyes out of embarrassment, then down to her strange necklace, then back up to her eyes.

"Don't worry about it," she said, leaning against the Banshee's railing. "It is lovely to make your acquaintance, may I ask your name?"

"Mizu," he answered, finally less taken aback by the strange woman. "And you are?*

"Y/n," she said, reaching out her hand limply, again out of habit more than anything else. Mizu looked at her with pure confusion, almost fear. Y/n giggled again, this time to hide her embarrassment. "It is expected to kiss a lady's hand where we're going."

Mizu nodded and cautiously took the girl's hand, which was smaller then her own, and cool to the touch from the ocean winds. He kissed it with the gentleness most men she encountered lacked.

"You'll make a proper gentleman," y/n remarked as she retrieved her hand once again and placed it under her head. She scanned Mizu as had her. Admittedly he was rather dashing. So much so she'd forgotten what she was originally there to ask him. Fowler was the last thing on her mind. "What's with the spectacles?" she asked.

"My eyes are unnatural back home," he told her.

"Is that so?" Y/n asked rhetorically. Perhaps without thought for personal space, she leaned forward and took the yellow frames from the man's face. She was greeted with eyes that would put the sea herself to shame. "You needn't wear these anymore, your eyes are beautiful." The young sailor folded the glasses and handed them back to the blue eyed man.

A small smile graced Mizu's face at the first genuine compliment he'd heard in regard to his eyes. He looked over the beautiful yet foreign face of the woman in front of him. The journey to London was certainly something to look forward to now.

[mika-no-sekai-blog]

Game

Part II

Word count: 2500+

Warnings: language, mentions of blood, injuries

Please note that English isn't my first language, so there might be mistakes. I'm very sorry

You returned to Velaris from a dangerous mission. Even though it was success, this wasn't a triumphant return. This time you totally fucked up and what was the worst there was no way to take it back.

You were rushing few steps behind Azriel who was carrying unconscious Cassian in his arms. Blood was dropping on the floor of the House of Wind leaving a trail on the corridor. Cassian's wings were tattered, right one limply hanging in unnatural angle.

What had you done? Tears were stinging your eyes as you hurried after spymaster to healer's room. If Cassian lost his wings, you wouldn't be able to forgive yourself for the rest of your miserable life. This all happened solely because you and Azriel couldn't stand each other, because you couldn't manage to suppress the hatred and cooperate together.

Madja was already waiting for you and as soon as Cassian was laid down on the bed, she threw both of you out from the room. She didn't need drama while trying to save the life. Everybody knew you and Azriel couldn't be in the same room without arguing.

Azriel's eyes were darting between the door and you. He was worried for his brother and at the same time mad at you.

"This," he hissed pointing his finger at the door, "is all because of you! If something happens to him-"

"What?! Will you beat me up? Or worse?" you fired back. "It's also your fault. I won't let you blame me alone for this!"

Blood was dropping from his leathers forming a puddle under his feet. It wasn't just Cassian's blood. He was injured, too. Azriel was pale, barely standing on his feet, but he didn't want to show his vulnerability, not in front of you. Your heart painfully squeezed.

"You know what? Go fuck yourself!" you turned on your heel and marched away to your room. When you turned around the corner, you heard a loud thump. You wanted to return back, to help him, but you couldn't. Clenching fingers into fists and gritting teeth you forced yourself to keep walking. You were worried about Cassian, but standing in front of the door wouldn't help him anyway. You decided to try to visit him later after everyone had left.

Rhysand announced you he should arrive soon, he would take care of both of them. You slammed door of your room closed and started pacing up and down. How could you let things go wrong like this?

When you calmed down a bit you started to put down your leathers, piece after piece. Dried blood made it even harder. On your right side there was a deep cut. If it wasn't for Cassian it could be much worse and you would need Madja to mend you back together. He saved you even though now he might lose his wings because of that. A sob escaped your lips as hot tears rolled down cheeks.

As you peeled off pieces of fabric together with dried blood, the wound started to bleed again. You took a clean gauze from small box with medicines you kept in your room and pressed it to the wound. It should heal soon enough, but no need to make a mess all around.

After a fast shower you lay down on the bed. While waiting for Rhys to let you know about Cassian's condition, tired you fell asleep.

When you woke up it was already evening. You were still exhausted, but worries pulled you out of the bed. You needed to see Cassian, to make sure he's alive and his wings were safe. At first you went to the healer's room, but nobody was there. Room was dark and clean, not a trace of blood. So you decided to try his room.

You were about to knock on the door when you heard deep and raspy voices from inside.

"I'm so sorry, Cass. I behaved like a jerk."

" 's fine.. How.. is.. Y/N?" Cassian spoke with difficulty, his voice weak. He was awake. You breathed out in relieve closing your eyes.

"Dunno," it was Azriel. You bit on your lip. No way you could go in when he was sitting there. You decided to try your luck later. As you were returning to your room, Rhys' claws caressed wall around your mind and you let him in.

"Finally woke up," his voice was gentle, but cold. He was mad, no wonder. "I need to talk with you. Come to my office as soon as you can." He didn't wait for answer and left. You exhaled deeply, mentally preparing for the unpleasant talk. Finding the closest balcony you jumped down and winnowed to the River House.

Azriel was watching peacefully snoring Cassian, shadows swirling around him, whispering to his ear. His brother was out of the worst, Madja even saved his wings. Yet the guilt haunted him. If he just wasn't such idiot, if he wasn't arguing with Y/N, if he wasn't so weak, so scared to talk about his feelings. None of this would happen. Sighing he put head in his scarred hands.

Rhysand's claws impatiently knocked on his adamant walls. It came later than he thought. Steeling his thoughts and feelings, Azriel let him in. "My office. Now," and he was gone. Groaning Azriel stood up, every wound reminding him of his bad choices.

When he arrived to River House, the house was unnaturally quiet, anger seeping from the walls. Shadows informed him that Rhys sent everyone away for the shit show that was about to come. It wasn't particularly good sign.

The door on Rhys' office was ajar and High Lord was seated behind his desk waiting. He seemed to be calm, but Azriel knew better. He stepped in, bracing for whatever was about to happen. Rhysand glared at him. "Sit," he barked.

Azriel did as he was told taking note he is the only one being called in. Partly he was glad for that, but the thorn of malice pricked his heart.

"Explain," Rhysand barked at him, his violet eyes burning holes into shadowsinger.

"Shouldn't we wait?" Azriel asked coldly, knowing nobody else was to come. Rhysand gritted teeth, growling. "I am not the only one to be blamed. You know she drives me crazy always finding some way to complain, to-"

"Stop with this excuses! You are my spymaster, my brother, one of the best in the court, yet you behaved like a total amateur! Do you even understand what could have happened?! You could have him killed just because of your utter arrogance!" Rhysand growled.

Azriel was looking him straight in the eye, refusing to budge. The shadows gathered around him, hissing like snakes ready to strike.

The magic wall in the corner of the room disappeared revealing the person that was held there. Y/N swayed on her legs, but she recovered immediately.

"We all have enough of your fights. This was the last drop," Rhysand said angrily and stood up. "You will solve your problems and you will do so right now and right here." With that he walked out and shut the door closed behind him. "I won't let you out until you find a way to live with each other in peace." He shouted back as his powers locked you in the office and left.

"Rhysand," she tried the handle. "Rhys, let's talk about this. You can't leave me locked with him. Rhysand!" There was no answer. She sighed heavily resting her forehead on solid wood of the door.

"It's useless," Azriel grunted watching her closely. He always watched her when she didn't know about it. His hazel eyes darted to the desk in front of him as she turned around.

"Tell me about that," she murmured rolling her eyes. She walked to the armchair near the fireplace on the other side of the room and sat down.

Silence stretched between them. Five minutes. Ten minutes. Half an hour. That was the longest time shadowsinger spent with Y/N without getting into a fight. Azriel was seated with his back to her, but shadows kept him updated on every little move. She looked sad and just as miserable as he felt. He never wanted their relationship to be like this. He didn't want to growl and shout at her, getting the same treatment from her. It was the easier way he decided for, but it wasn't pain free at all.

For some reason she seemed to be more approachable than ever. Azriel decided to try it. He stood up, moving closer to her. She turned her face to the fire, trying to put herself together.

"If we don't want to stay here for the rest of our lives, we should.. talk.. figure things out as Rhys said," he said softly. Her head snapped up to him, brows furrowed in confusion. He had never used this tone with her before.

Watching him with caution for a while she snorted. "Stop mocking me." Azriel noticed the hurt in her voice. He frowned, sitting down to armchair next to her. Y/N shot up as if somebody pinched her, moving away from him to the window. She pretended to look at the city, but spymaster caught her reflection on the glass. Her eyes were closed.

"That is not my intention. What do you want to do?"

"I'm tired, I want to sleep," she murmured.

"I meant about our situation, but I guess we can postpone it until morning." Azriel groaned. There was only one sofa in Rhys' office, rest were armchairs. If he didn't want to sleep on cold hard floor, there was no other option. He began to make himself comfortable on armchair he was settled in.

Hearing rustle of his wings Y/N turned around. "What are you doing," she raised a brow.

"You said you need rest, so I'm getting ready," Azriel tried to grin, but it turned into a grimace.

She shook head. "Take sofa."

He rubbed back of his neck, blushing slightly. "Uhm.. ladies first," he muttered.

"Don't be a dick. I'm smaller, I can fit the armchair comfortably. You're huge Illirian brute, you need much more space." Maybe it was meant as an insult, but Azriel felt a pinch of care behind her words. It actually made his heart beat faster. Slowly he moved to sofa. He expected her to suddenly change her mind, but she only kicked her shoes off and curled up on armchair, perfectly fitting in to the small space.

"Night-night," Y/N whispered tiredly.

"Good night," he whispered back.

Lights went out. Room darkened, lights of the city behind the windows were the only source of dim light. Soon enough Azriel could hear Y/N's breath deepened and slowed down. If only they could stay like this. Shadowsinger sincerely wished for it. It was first time they actually spent some time together in silence. It was pleasant and Azriel felt so relaxed like never before. He felt so good that he thought he could actually fall asleep. However his hope was short-lived.

The sofa was more uncomfortable than it seemed to be at first glance. He tried to change his position, but as soon as he moved Y/N winced and groaned. She was light sleeper. He had never noticed it. And so he was lying there while watching her sleeping face.

The grandfather clock in the corner struck one. Azriel was fascinated, sleep long forgotten. His eyes were studying Y/N's face. So many glimpses of different emotions he'd never seen on her. Just like right now.

She was smiling. But it wasn't a normal smile she showed to her friends and family. It was so sincere, so sweet, so full of love. He found himself wondering if she had a boyfriend, some lover who she smiled like this at. If yes he would definitely find out soon. He needed to see the lucky bastard who got what Azriel wanted for so long. Jealousy filled his chest leaving a bitter taste in his mouth.

"Love..you.." she muttered, the smile plastered to her face. Azriel's throat tightened. He would give everything he had to be the one receiving those words and smiles.

"Az..riel.." He stiffened. No way. Her eyes were closed, still fast asleep. Was it possible she felt him staring, woke up and decided to make fun of him?

"It isn't funny," he growled lowly. Y/N jerked. Her eyes clouded with sleep darted around, scanning the room for danger. Finding nothing suspicious she again fell asleep.

Azriel let out the breath he was holding, eyes so wide opened that they threatened to roll down to the floor.

No. Way.

It wasn't joke. She dreamed about him. That smile, those words, it all belonged to him alone. Warmth and hope filled his racing heart.

He got an idea.

You woke up to a bright morning light beaming the to Rhysand's office through windows. Stretching arms above the head you sat up. You sighed. So it wasn't just a nightmare. You were still locked in a room together with Shadowsinger.

He stood by the window behind the Rhys' desk, his back facing you. Hearing your ruffling he turned to you.

"Good morning," he smiled widely.

You almost choked on your own saliva. "What the fuck," you coughed.

"I have plan how to get us out of here. Listen closely. We don't have much time. Rhysand will be here soon." He explained you his idea quickly.

"That won't work," you wrinkled your nose.

"Try to believe me."

Before you could answer, steps sounded in the hall behind the door. Wards shattered and door unlocked. Azriel swiftly grabbed you and squeezing you in a tight embrace he kissed you. Your knees buckled, only Azriel's strong arms held you upright. You'd already received many kisses, but this one.. it winded the air out from your lungs, the world turned upside down.

When he finally broke the kiss, both of you were panting. You couldn't take your eyes off of the hazel ones. Morning light accentuated the gold flecks in them making them even more shiny. The smell of cedar filled your lungs, his taste still on your tongue. You swallowed.

"Well well.. I thought I will find at least one death body here. Instead it seems I interrupted sex attempt," Rhysand laughed out, his brows raising in surprise.

Azriel looked at him, saying something. However you didn't hear him. Your thoughts swirled around this male and those perfect lips of his. How? Why? This was supposed to be just a game, show for your friends, but it brought out all the feelings you were trying to suppress for years. How could you play along without destroying yourself in the process?

Before you noticed you were back in your room at House of Wind.

"Rhys believed it. You were great," Azriel praised you.

"Get out," you growled lowly.

"We have to continue this game otherwise somebody could find out," he tried to keep smirking, but you noticed the moment however short it was, when his smile faltered. The hurt. It was better this way. You couldn't keep up with this shit show. Your heart wouldn't survive it.

"I said get out," you growled glaring at him. Azriel raised his hands in surrender.

"Okay, but don't forget. We have to convince them," he said coldly and backed out from your room. You slammed door closed behind him. Bitter tears traced down your face. You curled up on the bed and cried.

[1800rue]

Hey there!! Can I get a Keith Kogane x waterbending reader and their childhood friends with Allura?Anyways he kinda thinks their just there because they doesn’t fight them or have advice like Coran but one day they waterbends to save him and he thinks they are kinda cool

Keith Kogane X GN!Waterbending Reader

characters included: keith kogane

scenario: in an act of saving ones friend, reader was quick to protect their crush from sudden death.

warnings: shitty writing, unedited !

a/n: i'm not sure how to feel about this, i feel like the ending sucks and most of the characters are OOC :(

He met you the same way he met Coran and Allura. Pure accident. Lance caught Allura who fell out of the tube, and Keith caught you,

He noticed the marks on your and Allura's cheeks and when he touched you, your ocean blue markings glowed.

He wasn't sure if it was his fault, or it was just yourself who caused them to glow.

When Keith caught you, you were still asleep, but the sudden feeling of someones warm body made contact with your cold one. Your eyes fluttered open to be greeted with a jacket.

A red and white jacket.

Your arms were held by black gloved hands, and when you got a good view of your holder, purple eyes met yours and you suddenly screamed. Pushing him away and raising an arm into the air.

Keith groaned, hitting the floor with a thud, but soon froze and raised his head that follwed a water blade that was pointed at it throat.

"Who are you!" You demanded an answer. However the by didn't have enough time to answer as you shouted again,

"What are you doing in the castle?"

"Where is King Alfor?"

You asked, looking up and around the Castle walls.

"Where's....."

"Allura!"

Your smile formed on your lips, noticing your Altean friend stand by another boy you've never seen before.

Keith watched as you hugged the other Altean. For some reason he couldn't keep his eyes off you. Suddenly, another tube rose from the ground, and soon all eyes were on a man with orange hair, and a bushy orange mustache.

-

Ever since that day, Keith's curiousity for your waterbending abilites grew...and so did your love. However, you had no idea if Keith liked your back?

Does he even notice you?

Sure, there are times he's asking about your powers, but when you told him you don't fight, or have any interest in fighting, he's kinda been dying down on being curious. Almost learned all about you are your powers.

The others adored your powers, and loved it when you showed off to them what you can do. Keith would just stand by and watch, not complimentimng at all.

You don't blame him...you don't hold any purpose then being Allura's childhoodfriend. The other explained he's just like that, and he's not really a people person. However, you can't help but think your not good enough for him.

-

Timeskip to a Galra attack on a planet you've been visiting. To think this could have been a break from all the Galra attacks, but NO. Voltron has yet to be form, but the Lions were set free and ready to be piloted by their Paladins.

Of course, you were left in the castle with Shiro and Coran, for now Allura was now the Blue Paladin, Lance was the Red Paladin, and Keith was the leader of Voltron.

Nothing changed with you.

"KEITH!" You suddenly jumped hearing Lance's loud shout to his rival, "Come on, man! I had that!" You took a deep inhale to calm your nerves.

"They were coming at you at three different sides, you didn't have it!" Keith retorted.

You sighed, hearing both Keith and Lance argue.

"Out of all the times you guys fight, this is not the time!" Pidge shouted over coms, barely dodging a laser blasted from a Galra cruiser. "Hunk! Jet on your 6!"

It was chaos out there, and all you can do over here is watch while Shiro attempted to order everyone around. However, ever since Keith became the leader, he found it a bit hard.

You wanted to go out there and help, but Shiro kept you back, not knowing if you'll even make it a foot out there without a lion, or even a ship!

As the chaos around you roared, you looked at your hands. You kept thinking about things you could do to help your team, yet nothing seemed to light up.

In your train of thought, Keith's sudden scream caused you to look back up to his lion get hit with a laser beam and fall to the dirt. A dirt cloud covered the area of his lion.

"KEITH!" Everyone shouted over coms.

Your heart felt like it got stabbed seeing Keith's lion hit the ground na dnot emerge from the dust.

Come on, Keith. You whispered under your breath. Come on! You felt your stomach twist in turn from nervousness. No one around can help because there all pinned down from the Galra fighter jets.

You squeezed your hands, watching the screen in front of you. You felt your lips quiver, and thats when you snapped.

Coran noticed your sudden form, and looked over to you and was about to ask what's wrong, but he was too late when you suddenly darted out of the control room.

"Y/N!" Shiro shouted out in frustrastion.

Once your feet hit the dirt, you ran faster then you ever could below the battle. Destroyed Galra jets fell from the sky, causing you to use your waterbending abilites to push you forward toward Keith's lion. Meanwhile, the ones already on the ground? You just jumped over to ran around.

"Y/N, you are going to get yourself kil-" You shut your ear communicater off, your running only increased.

Upon reacing the Red lion, you touched its large leg as it started to stand up. However, it was really shaky, almost like it was about to fall again.

"Keith! Keith- can you hear me?" You turned your com on, and your heart relaxed when you heard his voice.

"Augh...augh..Y/N? Yeah, Yeah, I can hear you!"

You smiled softly, knowing he's aiive, but possibly ingured due to the movement of his lion.

Just as soon things seemed okay, and Keith can get back into battle, Pidge's voice rang though your com...and she didn't sound happy..more like..

"Y/N! KEITH! Move, NOW!"

Your eyes widedned as you felt the presence of something coming for you at a high speed. Not wanting Keith to get more hurt then he already is, you raised your hands up from your sides.

The water from the river around the planet rose quickly, and merged into one around you. A large ball of water was soon thrown toward the Galra jet that was flying low toward you, and with a spin of your heel the ball of water smashed against the ship.

The blast you threw was hard and heavy, the fighter jet flew backwards, hitting the dirt and exploding.

Heavy breaths left your mouth as you relaxed your arms back to your side, the area around you wet and cold.

"Y/N.." Keith called out for you. With a soft and tired smile you circle back around to face Keith's lion that stood over you. You looked at the creature in the eye and chuckled,

"Talk me after you formed Voltron...and after I take a nap..."

You sighed, your knees giving out. However, the Red Lion caught you in it's mouth and hovered over the trees, placing you down in a safer place in the trees around the river you used as a weapon.

"Thank you..."

[honeylations]

Can you write Kazuha x fem reader?

OFCCC <3

Love me some Kazuhabs too :p

NAKAMURA KAZUHA x FEM!READER

Prompt: Kazuha is currently on tour in Japan, meaning you were alone in Seoul, only being able to communicate on FaceTime. That doesn’t stop you from showing your girlfriend just how much you missed her ;)

Warnings/Notes: phone sex, voyeurism(?), pillow humping, mutual masturbation, g!p Kazuha, dirty talk

———

“I miss you” You muttered, left side of your face squished into your mattress as you held your phone up.

Kazuha pouted at your cute self and took a few screenshots, reminding herself to make it her lock screen later. Her and the other Le Sseragirls were on tour at the moment in Japan which left you lonely in Korea. She offered to buy you a ticket but it was bad timing, considering you had many uni assessments happening at the same time.

And plus, Sakura screamed at you and Kazuha saying that studying is more important and you didn’t have the balls to disagree.

“Miss you too, baby” She giggled at your moping state.

“Is that Y/n-HI Y/N!!! WISH YOU WERE HERE!!” Yunjin screamed from Korean to English, peeking over to the point that you could only see her nostrils.

Kazuha clicked her tongue and pushed her head away.

“That’s not nice, Zuha! Tell her off, Y/n!!” Yunjin whined like a child.

“Zuha, be nice to your members please” You chuckled.

“I am nice! Just not to this loser” She side eyed the American.

“Whatever. Anyways, the rest of us are heading off to a grocery store and Miss Lame-akura Lamezuha here doesn’t wanna tag along”

“You know what’s lame? Your attempt of making a joke” the younger Japanese girl fired.

Yunjin dramatically gasped. “Asshole. Bye Y/n!! Talk to you later!”

“Bye Yunjin, have fun!”

Within a few seconds you heard the door close, meaning you and your girlfriend finally had some alone time. You didn’t know how to tell your girlfriend that your hornymeter was shooting to the sky but you assumed she was too tired, considering she’s been practicing her ass off.

“Did you eat dinner yet, babe?” Kazuha asked softly, moving around to fix her bed sheet which caused her to lower the phone to where her shirtless self was exposed.

She was wearing her Calvin Klein bra and plaid pyjama pants that got your breath stopping. Her abs were in view and flexing when she did little movement.

Oh how you missed touching them, kissing them…riding them.

You felt yourself get wetter, secretly rubbing your thighs together to ease some steam but a better idea formed into mind. Kazuha finally settled and looked at you on the phone. “Babe? Hello?”

You groaned into your mattress. “Kazuha baby, I’m really horny. Like super horny”

Her eyes widened a little bit before she relaxed. “I wish I was there to help you”

“You still can” You smirked.

Your girlfriend tilted her head, mirroring your smirk. You already knew that she knew your plan. “You’re so bad, fuck” She muttered into her palm.

Taking that as approval, you removed all your clothes and angled the phone to show Kazuha the pillow in between your legs. You then made the phone stand on the bedside table which gave your girlfriend a better view on your bare body.

“Mmm Zuha baby” You whined while starting to rock your hips back and forth, feeling the softness brush against your aching folds.

“God fucking damn it” You heard Zuha hiss.

Your hips moved faster as you groped your breasts, twisting the hardened nipples harshly. “Daddy~ Want your hard cock inside me”

On the phone you could see Kazuha jerking her 8 inch at an even pace, the wet noises filling the room and you could feel yourself get impossibly hornier. She had her lower lip tugged between her teeth and she released deep voiced grunts. “Fuck, ride it like you do with my cock”

“Yes yes~” You moaned, letting Zuha see your red face and the drool sliding down your chin as you focused on her stroking her delicious dick that was leaking with precum.

You quickly reached over to grab your dildo from the drawer and placed it on the bed, your back now facing the camera, letting Zuha see your cherry blossom back tattoo. “Wish this was your cock, baby”

“So naughty, princess” Kazuha chuckled in a tone that got your back shivering.

You remembered that her members could return anytime soon so you held the fake cock as you slowly sat onto it, releasing a long moan when you felt it stretch your insides. Unfortunately not as much as your girlfriend does.

“Kazuha~”

“Need to cum quick, princess. Come on” Kazuha panted, holding back with all her strength.

“Already needing to cum, daddy? You love this pussy so much?”

“I do, fuck, I do!” She lightly squeezed her desperate cock.

Supporting your balance by holding onto the mattress, you started to fuck yourself into the cock. Your girlfriend got a good view of the dildo disappearing into your tight cunt continuously, your beautiful moans were music to her ears. “Want to fill you up so bad, princess. Fuck you pregnant”

“O-Oh Zuha!” You yelped, her words having a huge effect on you.

“That’s right, baby. Keep fucking your self like a slut. Can’t survive a day without my cock up your cunt” She hissed, bucking her hips to match pace.

You looked into her eyes with a lewd expression, your thrusts starting to become sloppy. “C-Cumming, daddy! Gonna cum all for you”

“Go on, baby. Cum” She bit her lip harder once she saw your legs shake with you crying uncontrollably from the intense pleasure.

Trying to recover, you looked back at your girlfriend and saw her head thrown back, still stroking her cock as she shots many strings of cum all over her hand and stomach. “Fuck fuck fuck! Y/n~”

You slowly pulled the dildo out of yourself, facing the phone with a smile. Your girlfriend looked at you, her eyes droopy. “I came so much, holy shit” You heard her chuckle.

“Let’s clean up, babe. The girls will come back” You warned, blowing her a quick kiss before hopping off the bed (trying to stand with your wobbly legs) to change the sheets and your clothes.

Kazuha was quick to do the same, unable to bear the embarrassment of her members walking in to see her naked, covered in her own load.

You both settled after a nice 5-10 minutes as if you two didn’t just fuck through the phone but it didn’t bother you nor Kazuha one bit. You were in the middle of telling Kazuha about your stressful exams when 4 loud girls barged through the door.

“HONEY WE’RE HOME!” Yunjin sang.

Chaewon and Eunchae were waving bags of snacks for you to see.

“Don’t call me honey” Kazuha said with a glare.

“Oh please, I was talking to Y/n. I’m not interested in you like that” The American fired, rolling her eyes.

“Not interested in you either, look at the state of you” Kazuha made a stank face before turning her eyes back to you. “Hi baby”

You giggled. “Hi”

A/N: please tell me y’all get the Derry Girls reference😭😭

[forgiveness-in-the-misery]

I glimpsed a post on reddit that made the claim that Murderface is incredibly under developed as a character and is basically Cartman from South Park and it is genuinely the dumbest take I have seen.

Especially when you consider the times Brendon talked about originally just making each character represent people you find in the metal scene or would see at a show and he was the guy who just stands around and bitches about everything….but then quickly realized that is super limiting and began exploring why this person is this way.

And the show does that. A lot.

His parents died, he was raised by grandparents who didn’t want custody of him but took him anyway, we know his grandma provided less than the bare minimum in terms of child care for him. We know he was consistently bullied at school and harassed and had nobody he could confide in or vent to.

We know it fucks him up that his parents died and the way they died and he won’t ever know why his dad did what he did other than his assumption it was because they rather die than look at him (i will die on the hill thag Stella told him that)

We know he’s insecure, we know rejection scares him so he just goes ahead and sets out to be rude and obnoxious and fail at things so that way he won’t be surprised when shit goes badly. We know he’s scared of being abandoned and with the finale we know he has been scared of becoming like Magnus.

A man who emotionally abused him enough to fully instill into him the idea that he is talentless and worthless, that they all are. He wanted to just run off and isolate away from his friends because of the things Salacia forced him to do, because he would rather die than hurt his friends. Because even before Salacia he knows that his negativity was all parroting of Magnus and emotionally abusing people he loves and he doesn’t want to be that person at all and never meant to become that person.

Like literally how can you claim this character is under developed and compare him to Cartman who is basically just a mouth piece at this point for the showrunners shitty opinions.

[mitch-the-silly]

First of all: I *love* your writing, it's really good :]] Second: Could we get a Vox x gn!sick!reader ? I've got a really bad case of the flu atm and i figured it might be cute

Thanks so much!!! I got you!! Vox anything is my specialty!! Anyway, hope you get better!!!

Vox x gn!sick!reader

"I said, Rest and Drink Some Tea!"

Imagine!

You sniffled, the covers keeping you warm but you were still shivering. It was horrible what was happening to you. You wouldn’t be able to work or even walk out of your room. But worse of all, you had a date with Vox today. You didn’t even have the energy to pick up the phone to call him. However, you didn’t even have to.

Before you knew it, he’d zapped himself into your room. Eyes opening wide when he saw the state you were in. “What happened? You’re sick and you didn’t tell me? I almost thought you stood me up!” he sighed, sitting at the foot of your bed.

You sighed, your head throbbing, “I can barely even bring myself to speak…”

“Is it that bad? Shit… Look, stay here, I’ll bring you some tea or something, you get some rest. Don’t even try to get up!” He insisted, at which you simply nodded.

Once he came back, you’d dozed off a bit, but he tapped you awake, propping you up so he could give you your tea. “Here, I had someone make you some tea. Just sit back, have some rest, and drink some tea.” He spoke, lying down by your side.

“Vox no… you’re gonna get sick…” You grumbled, your nose stuffy and your will to argue so minimal that that was all you told him.

“And? I’ll be fine. Just shut up and sleep.” He hissed, cuddling close to you. He snapped his finger, turning on your TV and putting on a movie. “You need anything, just let me know, ok?” He added, pulling out his phone and texting his secretary to cancel all his meetings today. Immediately after, he sent a voice message, “Hey Velvette, Y/n is sick, I’m staying with them until they get better. Tell Val to NOT bother me today.”

He then, cuddled you closer, lying down with you until you fell asleep. Shit, he took a nap himself. And he didn’t really care if he got sick, he could just drink some medicine and call it a day. However, in the middle of that nap, you felt like you needed to get up. You didn’t know why, but despise this you were still tired. So you did, forgetting Vox was cuddling you. When you shifted, he grumbled awake. Seeing you standing up, shivering from the cold.

“Hey! I told you to rest and drink your tea! What are you doing up?”He exclaimed.

“I don't know, I just didn’t wanna lie down anymore…” You mumbled.

“Yeah, but you have to rest up until you feel better…” He sighed. “Come on, I’ll get you whatever you want, I’ll even change the show. Just don’t do anything. I’d rather you not overexert yourself…”

You huffed softly, “Fine… I just… I feel kind of useless right now.”

“Be as useless as you want. It’s kind of the point of me taking care of you. You shouldn’t be doing shit.” Vox retorted. “Come back to bed, now. C’mon…” He added, reaching out to you. And you just couldn’t say no to those inviting arms. So you returned to him, napping in his arms again.

[aalyssah]

Interesting Carnival Date

Pairing: Roman Reigns x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Angst/Fluff!

Word Count: 1,464

Request/Summary:⇩

A/N: This was requested by someone on Wattpad. Hope You Enjoy!

"Oh my gosh, this is so pretty!" You said, eyes reflecting the bright lights of the carnival rides.

After weeks of convincing Roman, he said yes to taking you to a carnival. He’s been so busy with work, and barely gets time off, but since his huge match against La Knight, Triple H let him have a week off.

"Not as pretty as you." Roman said, getting out the car and going to your side. He opened the door, holding his hand out for you. You slipped yours in his, standing next to him, looking around.

"I can't believe we're actually here!" Roman looked at you, seeing how happy you looked. You were glowing in the lights with your huge smile.

"Anything for you baby, you deserve it." You giggled as Roman leaned over and pressed a kiss to your cheek. He closed the car door and guided you both up the small walkway to where you could enter.

Of course he had to get vip wristbands for him and his baby girl.

You both walked to different games, specifically the bean bag toss game. "Oh, I'm a boss at this. Watch and learn, babe." You cockily said, cracking your knuckles.

You grabbed 3 bean bags before focusing on the hole. You threw the first one, missing completely. Roman gave you a look, basically saying 'Are you sure you're good at this?'

You were quick to make up an excuse. "That was just my warm up throw." Roman laughed at your excuse watching as you threw the second bag.

This time you were close, only missing the hole by an inch. "Oh come on, that should've gone in!" You complained with a huff. With the last bean bag in hand you took a deep breath before throwing.

This was the worst throw you've ever thrown because you missed the board. You actually threw a little too hard, the bean bag reaching over to whole other game.

"This isn't fair!" You whined, hands slapping against your thighs. Roman chuckled at your loss, handing the man a couple of bucks. "Now, let me show you how it's done." You glared at him at his mocking, watching as Roman threw each bag into the hole.

A loud ringing played near the worker, indicating Roman won. "We have a winner! Come pick your prize!" Roman went up to the guy, asking for a frog stuffed animal.

Without hesitation, he handed it to you, smiling at your reaction. "Thank you Ro, thank you so much, he's so cute!" You thank him, jumping in his arms, and hugging him.

Roman loved seeing you like this.

"What's next?" Roman asked. You looked around at the games and pointed out a spot. "Ooo, let's go play ring toss!" You suggested.

For that game you actually did better than bean bag toss. You won yourself, and ended up getting a prize for a small child who was crying.

Roman followed you around the carnival to many different games, holding many stuffies that Roman won after a little rage from you.

Although to anyone, it looked like a man was following some girl around, arms full of stuffies, but he didn't care. He loved you and would do anything for you, even if that means getting suffocated by stuffies.

Roman caught the eyes of a game he wanted to play. “I was thinking we can leave after one more game. I really wanna try that game where you have to shoot the water at the targets.” You nodded your head at his suggestion.

You and Roman walked to the water gun game seeing a guy standing there. His eyes locked on yours, a smile coming to his face. “Hello pretty lady, and man, what can I do for y’all?”

You ignored the man’s compliment, and began talking about the game. “Yes, me and my boyfriend would like to play this game.” The man’s smile turned into a frown at your words. “Oh, you got a boyfriend, I see.”

Roman gave the worker, who’s name was Mark, a questioning look. “Is that a problem, Mark?” Mark looked up at Roman with a bored expression. “Not at all. Anyways, hand some bucks over.” He demanded, holding his hand out.

You grabbed a couple of bucks from your pockets and slapped them in Mark’s hand. He looked at you with a smirk.

“You must be the rich one in the relationship. I love me a sugar mommy.” Your face scrunched up in disgust at the name he called you, but Roman was quick to put a stop to it. “Don’t call her that.” You got Roman’s attention after noticing how worked up he was getting.

He took his attention away from Mark before starting the game. “Players start spraying in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Squirt!” Mark looked at you as he said the last word. You brushed him off, focusing on the game.

You were giggling and yelling as Roman began to beat you. “Stop cheating!” Roman had a smile on his face as he took down more targets. “I’m not cheating, just get better.” You mumbled a curse word under your breath, trying to beat Roman.

Mark saw how much you wanted to win and tried to help. “Don’t worry, I’ll help ya out, pretty girl.” Mark started slapping Roman’s targets, getting more points for you.

You and Roman stopped playing, looking at each other in confusion. “Hey, stop, you’re ruining the game!” Mark didn’t listen, still hitting all the targets until a bell went off. “And the lady won!” You shook your head in denial.

The worker just ruined his own game. You weren’t having fun anymore. “Why would you do that?” Mark pouted at your whining.

“Awe, don’t cry. How about this, I’ll make it up to you. Go out on a date with me and we’ll play this game as many times as you want.”

Roman stepped in front of you, blocking your view of Mark. “Now I know you’re messing with me because I’m sure the first words she said to you was that I’m her boyfriend and now you got the nerve to ask her out on a date? In front of me?” Roman laughed, throwing his head back, not believing this man.

You grabbed onto Roman’s arm like earlier, trying to pull him away. “Babe stop, let’s just leave.” This time, Roman listened to you, grabbing your hand and walking away.

“Y/n, do you have the keys?” You and Roman searched for the keys in your pockets and purse. You both were only a few steps away from the water game, missing the way Mark watched the two of you.

Jealousy took over Mark as his body moved over to a water gun and started shooting water at you. You let out a squeal of shock, trying to cover yourself up. Mark had a plan though.

He was aiming at your top, making you almost drenched. Roman was shielding you, water drenching him as well. The water gun ran out of water, Mark standing tall and laughing.

“She might be your girl, but who’s got her wet?” After trying to hold them in for so long, the tears finally fell.

You spent almost 2 hours getting ready, wanting to look good for Roman, and even going out of your way to pick out a new skirt that he loved very much, just to look good for him, but Mark just ruined it.

When Roman saw your teary eyes looking up at him and heard the snickers from Mark, he lost it. He walked over towards Mark, with an angry look on his face.

“What’s wrong big man? Are you jealous that your girl wants me? You wish that she-” Mark’s words were cut off when Roman landed a punch to his face. Mark flew back, hitting the grass hard.

Roman was on top of him in an instant, punches after punches being thrown. People from around y’all watched as Roman laid it to Mark.

Security guards ended up coming and breaking up the fight.

Roman took you back to the car, getting a blanket, and covering you up. “I’m so sorry about his Roman. I didn’t know the guy would be so thirsty!” You cried out, apologizing.

“It’s not your fault. He’s just some prick that’s jealous cause he can’t no females.” You finally cracked a smile at his joke. “There it is. There’s that smile I missed.”

You stood up on your tippy toes and placed a kiss on his bearded cheek. “I love you and thank you for this very interesting carnival date.”

You sounded unsure of what to call what happened tonight, but you did know you had a lot of fun with your man.

[sorcerous-caress]

to dance with you | Astarion

[ fluff, heavy angst, bad end, character death, trauma, nb!reader ]

[Before the events of bg3, Reader is one of Astarion's victims ]

I am very sorry.

There was no taste to numbness, no colour, shape, or smell.

Just an absence, an emptiness. 

You couldn't escape it, no matter how much you tried. Much like total darkness, the abyss waited for you back home at the end of the day.

And while you knew it was hopeless to attempt to rationalise your way out of it, to cling to some justifications that explain that lack of warmth in your life, that just maybe it somehow made you superior to endure, you knew deep down it was a waste of time.

There's no dignity in suffering. There's no prize for enduring agony. 

Your drink was getting cold.

Lifting the cup to the edge of your lips, you swallowed down what you could of the lukewarm liquid. Barely registering the taste of it.

You're spiralling again. You always did around this time of year.

People say one must imagine sisyphus happy, and yet you've dragged your own corpse up this hill too many times to count. Clawed your way out of rot and into a resemblance of a functional adult.

Staring out the cafe window into the snow-covered city, you finished the rest of your now cold drink. It was barely night, and yet the sun has already said its goodnights.

The streets will fill out soon. The buzzing of the nightlife was just on the horizon. 

You found it ironic in a way, for how much Lathander's followers loved to proclaim the sun as the symbol of absolute goodness, then how come people only felt like being their true selves at night.

It felt like a curtain being drawn at the end of the show, when the angels slept and the pressure to perform melted away.

You should take your leave soon.

Your eyes shifted to stare into the bottom of your empty cup, traces of the remains of your drink have dried up in various shapes. 

"Good evening" a voice called out to you, someone standing in front of your table, next to the empty chair.

Looking up, you were met with ruby eyes. Silvery hair and curling around pointy ears, framing the pale face and.

"Would it be alright if I joined you, my dear?" The elf continued, voice gentle as if coaxing a rabbit out of its nest.

You don't know why, but at that moment you nodded.

He sat down on the opposite chair.

You weren't superficial. At least you didn't think so. People couldn't control their appearance, so what right do you have to judge them based on it?

Yet when you took in the man in front of you. His half lidded eyes made you the sole point of his focus, the subtle smile to his lips. You would've been blind to pretend that it didn't affect you in some way.

"Do you mind if I buy you a drink? Something to warm you up, maybe?" Clear concern in his voice, "it tends to get very cold quickly at night, and we don't want someone as lovely as you getting sick now, do we?"

He was…worried about your health? A stranger you've never met before?

You shook your head. "No, it's alright." He was probably just trying to be nice, "I wasn't aware I looked miserable enough to worry a stranger, I was just about to leave anyway."

His eyes widened, his smile dropping. "No wait…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend" he cleared his throat, seemingly embarrassed by the misunderstanding he caused, "But where are my manners? You may call me Astarion." 

You stared at the hand that he extended to you, he didn't seem phased by your hesitation to shake it. In fact, he patiently waited for you.

Not wanting to make this more awkward than it already is, you took his hand. He smiled again.

You told him your own name, and he said it suited you. His cold hands let go of yours after running his thumb across your hand.

"Please excuse my previous…failed attempt. I'm not used to approaching people." His eyes looked to the side, probably to mask his nervousness, you thought.

He seemed so bold and confident moments ago, yet the second you mentioned leaving, he immediately switched. 

Huh, people really aren't what they seem like, you thought to yourself. Who knew behind his confident facade was just someone like you.

"It's alright, I'm sorry for my rushed assumptions." You felt bad. This person was just trying to be nice, and you were rude to him for no reason but your own paranoia.

"I noticed you since you walked in," he admitted, "you looked…simply breathtaking." His eyes drank you up, taking in every detail of your form.

You've barely noticed him. You've barely noticed anyone in the cafe. You were too occupied wallowing in your own misery to give the outside world more than a passing glance.

"I'm flattered, really." You admitted, "but I'm not sure if I will live up to your expectations…" as shameful as it was to admit, you thought it was better to warn him early on than to pretend to be someone you're not.

Astarion's hand reached over the table, holding your own in a loose reassuring grip. Giving you enough space to pull back if you wanted to.

"Oh no, trust me." He gave your hand a comforting squeeze, "you're simply perfect." His voice dripped with honey, warm and sweet sliding down your throat.

You held his hand back.

"Then let me make it up to you, how about I buy you a drink? To warm you up." There was a playful edge to your voice as you repeated his words, "well by how cold your hand is, you probably really need this drink."

Amusement filled his face as he chuckled. "You clever little thing." Your eyes followed his tongue as he licked his lips, "I'm starting to like you already."

After a couple of drinks and some time, the two of you ended up leaving the establishment together. Light conversation flowed seamlessly and weaved into one another between you both.

To say he was easy to talk to would've been an underestimation. You felt like you're hanging out with a lifelong friend instead of a stranger you've met a couple of hours ago.

You really didn't pay much attention to time flying by, not when the night sky looked so mesmerising above you. Not when Astarion sat next to you on the garden bench.

And while your conversations didn't stay light for long, he didn't seem like he minded as he leant you his shoulder to lean on while you expressed your worries.

"I think you should tell them. They're your parents, after all." His arm kept you close to his body, "Isn't it their job to help you during rough times and all of that?"

"I don't know, I'm supposed to be an adult." You hid half your face in his shoulder, "I much rather suck it up until I find a new job, and then maybe I'll tell them."

Easier said than done. It's been a week since you've handed in your applications, and yet not a single letter was sent back to you.

"I just don't want to be a burden," you continued "sometimes I wish I didn't worry them so much. Maybe they'll do better without me holding them back." 

Astarion didn't reply. His hold tightened around you.

"Sometimes…I wish I could just disappear." You buried your face in his neck, taking in his scent and closing your eyes.

Again, no reply, only the sound of the night breeze rustling the nearby bushes. The moon looming over the both of you and showering you in her light.

A waning moon.

"I ruined the mood, didn't i?" You let out a bitter laugh as you pulled away from him, "I'm sorry."

There was a somber expression on his face, his usually sharp eyes appearing soft and round.

"No, not at all." He said, "I was just thinking about your words. Wishing to disappear."

With a heavy sigh, he turned to you. "I could preach to you all night about how valuable a single mortal life is like they do all morning at those temples, but we both know that's bullshit." His voice sounded more natural, vastly different from the smooth sultry tone he had before. "Life will still move on, with or without that person."

You snorted, "What, not a fan of the church and gods?" 

"More like they're not fans of mine. But I suppose we can't all have taste." Getting up from the bench, the moonlight illuminated the edges of his hair like a halo, completely facing you.

"I suppose they're missing out." Walking by his side, the two of you strolled through the garden at a slow pace. Hands occasionally brushing against each other.

"Definitely, who wouldn't want this face on their side. I'd probably get them more visitors than their clerics ever could." Leaning closer, Astarion stopped in his tracks as his hand held your face.

"Actually, something tells me you'd do very well at that job, helping others." You leaned into his hand, eyes fluttering shut for a moment.

With a sarcastic laugh, he said "Please, me?" 

"Yes, you." When you opened your eyes, you were met with his intense gaze, "you're really good at making people feel at ease, letting them speak their worries. Like you did to me."

"Darling, I did no such thing." He lowered his eyes to your lips, licking his own. Maybe he was using this as an excuse to avoid your gaze.

You gently lifted his chin to look at you again, "Sometimes the best way to help someone is to listen to them, truly listen." 

His lips pressed into a thin line.

"I have been cold and rude to you, and yet you've treated me with warmth…that's a gift, you know. I won't ever forget it." Your own hands cupped his face, contrasting against his pale cold skin. "So yes, if you ever consider being a cleric or something one day, you'll definitely have my recommendation." 

Closing the distance between the two of you, your lips gently pressed against his forehead. Wishing his safety and well being with a quick peck as you pulled away.

His own hands left you long ago, laying abandoned on his sides. His fingers twitched.

Taking a deep breath, you saw his usual easy going smile come back. You felt at ease again as he returned to what you knew as his normal self. "I can think of a way or two you could repay me then, something we would both enjoy greatly." he said.

You felt a subtle touch against your hips, his hands asking permission to hold you.

It was getting really late, you realised. Your dogs must be worried sick back home. Their anxious figures waiting in front of the doorstep, you remember kissing them goodbye before you left.

...

It will be alright, it's just one night. You always left them more food than normal just in case, so they'll be safe and happily fed until your arrival.

Maybe you can even introduce Astarion to them tomorrow. You have a feeling they'll absolutely love licking his face until his hair is a mess.

"Yeah." You pushed his hands to fully grip your hips, his smile grew. "That sounds good to me."

-

The time spent during the walk to his home flew by. He was very good at making you lose yourself in the moment. 

Stepping inside, he kept a tight hold on you as he led you through the corridors.

Huge oil paintings adorned the crimson walls, a red carpet to match. You immediately noticed the lack of windows, and whatever ones you could spot had a thick layer of black curtains drawn closely shut over them.

He ignored any servants you passed by, and likewise, they seemed to pretend you didn't exist either, as if you were invisible like a ghost.

Astarion's demeanour shifted the second you stepped foot inside the palace, and his replies reduced to one word or less whenever you tried to start a conversation. 

You had a sinking feeling in the pits of your stomach, gnawing at your flesh and slowing down your steps.

"Is something wrong?" You asked him after he led you into a bedroom at the end of the hall. "You don't seem well."

His back was turned to you.

You took a step forward, placing a hand on his back. "Astarion?"

He flinched away from your hand the second you touched him, as if you burned the flesh on his back. A low hiss of pain escaped his lips.

Turning to face you after a few seconds, his expression was schooled back into the most charming smile.

"I just tend to get nervous when it comes to initiating intimacy." He told you, a nervous look in his eyes as he shifted slightly.

Oh, is that why he has been acting this way? You offered a comforting smile. "That's completely alright. We don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with."

"... really? Even when you came the whole way here?" He said with a sceptical tone, "nonsense, my dear, I will get over it in time. I just…need a couple of minutes, yeah."

"I really mean it, Astarion, we don't have to do anything." You repeated yourself more firmly.

You thought your words might offer him some relief, yet the subtle frown to his lips only grew deeper. 

"How about we just get comfortable on the bed and see where the night takes us?" He offered, unbuttoning the cuffs of his embroidered shirt and sitting on the lush bed.

You didn't like his total disregard for your offer. You could tell he wasn't believing you. But you didn't want to push him at the time, so you just let it go.

After making some adjustments to your clothes until you were in a comfortable state, you joined him on the bed. He immediately turned to face you. His body was so close to yours.

"Now…" he whispered so close to your ear. "Just how much I wanted to make you mine since the moment I saw you."

One thing led to another, a teasing touch there, a promising squeeze here, and the taste of his lips against yours.

He just knew how to take your breath away, how to get you to melt into the kiss. Wanting more, chasing after his tongue for another taste.

His hand going down your body, feeling your throat, your chest, your waist, and then your thighs. Heat collected between your legs. You could feel your body respond back to his expert touches, completely ignoring your brain and forming a mind of its own as it grinded against his hands.

Pleasure was overwhelming you. It was both too much and not enough at the same time. It was addicting and consuming.

Was he enjoying it, too? Did seeing you this needy and responsive to his touches make him burn with lust and desire for you?

You tried breaking the kiss to get a good look at him, but he wouldn't relent. Wouldn't give you a chance to even think about anything else but your own pleasure.

When you finally managed to pull away from his lips, you couldn't get more than a glance at his expression before he immediately went for your neck. Sucking and marking the flesh with vigour, teeth sending shivers down your spine.

You didn't realise how sharp his teeth were until you felt them graze your neck. They were almost alarmingly sharp, one wrong move, and they'd glide easily into your flesh.

"Astarion…" you called out to him. His lips left your neck and took it as an invitation to kiss you again, stealing your breath away. "Astarion no wait- " you mumbled between each kiss.

That got him to stop, his hands pulling away from your body.

"Yes my love?" He breathed against your lips.

Your eyes met his, you took in his dishevelled appearance, the flush to his cheeks and his wet glistening lips. His eyes looked like they held desire in them, inviting and tantalising.

But the more you stared into them, the less they seemed to look at you and instead look through you. Deep inside his eyes, he was a thousand miles away. 

You couldn't even see a hint of desire in them if you took away the facade.

"I don't want this." You whispered.

"Did I do something wrong?" 

"No…I just don't want this."

He got off of you, giving you your space back.

Neither of you mentioned it, instead each of you stuck to their own side of the bed.

It was clear he didn't know how to proceed forward, a crease to his eyebrows while in deep thoughts, as you assumed.

The silence was uncomfortable, unbearable even. Your mind wandered back to your home, your comfortable safe haven. 

In an attempt to lighten the mood, you said, "one time, Luna cost me over 5000 golds."

Seemingly coming back to reality, it took Astarion some seconds to fully register your words, "Luna?"

"My dog," you said, "the sweetest shepherd you'll ever meet. I came home from work late one time and she wagged her tail so fast that she fractured it." 

"She sounds charming." Astarion let out a soft laugh, "although, why Luna?"

"She's black and white, you know like the phases of the moon. I thought it was clever at the time." You admitted, "or are you more of a cat person?"

"I'm not an animal person at all, honestly." 

"What, are they also not fans of you?"

That got another chuckle out of him. "They tend to be too smelly for my liking, but I'd take a cat over a horse any day." 

He turned his body to face you again, you did the same.

"Really? Luna adores horses, she could teach you a thing or two."

"Are you really not only suggesting that the dog and I meet up, but that she'd also take me as her pupil?"

"I mean…well yeah, I was kinda hoping I'd take you to meet her tomorrow morning." You cleared your throat, "well that's if you want to.

His focus seemed to drift again, "...you don't happen to have cats, do you?" His tone was quieter than before, eyes not fully meeting yours.

"There's a stray that comes to visit Luna daily, he's not very friendly to other people but who knows." As corny as you thought your line sounded, you still proceeded to say it in hopes it will lift his mood up, "maybe he'll also fall victim to your charm like I did."

Instead of the reaction you expected, you were met with genuine scepticism.

"Ha" his laugh was bitter, "you don't have to spare my feelings darling, I know you don't see me that way."

You sat up on the bed.

"What do you mean?"

He looked up at you, you felt like he was attempting to make himself smaller against the pillow.

"Oh I'm not holding a grudge or anything." He claimed, "I can admit it when I'm not someone's type or whatever."

Brushing a strand of his hair behind his pointy ear, you tried to coax him to meet your eyes again. "...Astarion, I am very attracted to you.

He leaned away from your hand. "Then why did you want to stop?"

The truth burned in your throat to admit. "I just…I didn't feel like you were enjoying it. Like you wanted it."

That look, the eyes staring through you.

Astarion seemed very conflicted, about what? You weren't sure. But you wanted to comfort him, to take away his pain and carry it yourself instead.

He never denied your words.

You pulled your hand away from his hair, still not laying down beside him as you watched his body curl under the covers.

"It's alright, you don't have to explain anything." You got up from the bed, "I can leave if it's-" just as you were about to pick up your clothes, his hand immediately grabbed your wrist in a desperate grip.

"No," he said with dread in his eyes, "you can't."

It was a complete switch from his previous state, you weren't sure what to even make of it.

"I can't?" 

He seemed to catch himself, letting go of your wrist.

"stay with me, at least for tonight." His eyes were pleading, "we can just hold each other, isn't that what you want?" 

He sat up from the bed, gently taking your hands in his as he led you back to the comfort of the sheets.

"It's what I want." He whispered, voice so inviting and beckoning you closer, "I swear." 

You weren't strong enough to resist.

Following after him, your bodies pressed together under the soft sheets. You only felt your own heartbeat in your chest as he held you close. He was cold, so you shared your own body warmth to warm him up. 

The candles in the room were burning out, a calming silence fell. Lulling you to rest and let the day end.

You could only hear your own heart beating.

This was nice, it felt nice and safe so it must be.

Just as sleep was about to steal you away, Astarion's voice nudged you back awake.

"What do you like about me?" His voice was raw, sincere.

You couldn't see his face, "you, of course."

He moved against you, "obviously, now be more specific."

You tried to think about it. It felt like one of these important questions that'd shape your future relationship with him, so you tried to give it all of your thoughts.

There were so many things to love about him, but many of them were things you'd still love him without.

Yet they were still parts of him, but how many parts were actually him.

"Your nature." Was the answer you gave, still not quite satisfied with it.

"Oh shit." His serious tone didn't last long before being replaced by a playful one, "I didn't invite a druid to my bed, did i?" 

You snorted, "very funny, but I meant it." 

Even without seeing his face, you felt his lips curl upwards against your skin. Claiming that small victory was enough for you.

"You know" you found yourself rambling, "my day was going absolutely horrible until you showed up. I don't usually really believe in gods or miracles, but…you were the closest thing to a guardian angel I've ever had."

A yawn escaped your lips, you continued.

"I was too inside my head. I forgot that a whole world outside existed. A world with people like you." Your eyelids fluttered, sleep lurked behind them. "As shitty as life can be, somehow I believe things will be okay." 

Adjusting your position so you could face him in the dark, you felt his body stiffen against yours.

"Goodnight Astarion." you gave his forehead a small kiss, wishing for his safety and well being. "Rest well."

-

The deep hours of the night is when the Szarr palace fell the most silent. Merely an hour or two separating them from dawn.

A warm living breathing body laid next to him, just like many others before. And Astarion embraced them just like many others before.

But the waves of emotions swirling inside him like poison were definitely new.

He didn't get a hint of rest, he couldn't. As much as he wanted to just close his eyes for the remaining hours and ignore the waking world. After all they will definitely disappear in the morning, so what's a few hours of blissful ignorance?

But he just couldn't, the thought itself threatened to turn his stomach inside out. Disgust he has never felt in years lurching at his insides.

It's their fault, it's all their fault.

They should've made it easier for him. They should've just closed their eyes, spread their legs, and ignored his existence. 

They shouldn't have mentioned their stupid moon dog. They shouldn't have made him leer inside at the idea of having parents to support you yet still choosing to suffer alone.

How dare they be so cruel? How dare they kiss his forehead so tenderly.

He was choking. His throat burned so much that every breath felt like needles being dragged against the inside of his neck.

Worst of all, he could still hear their heartbeat. Did his own sound like that before? Is this what it felt like to have a speck of evidence that you're alive? 

A constant reminder of your mortal life, of your endless potential, of your stupid naivety and your pointless kindness.

His whole body was shaking.

Cazador will be here soon. Just like so many times before.

He needed to act fast. He needed to do something. Otherwise, he felt like he would go crazy.

They don't deserve whatever that monster did with all the others. They don't deserve a fate that cruel, not someone like them. Please God, anyone else but them.

He prayed, holding them closely as he begged and pleaded with each one of the Gods he could recall the name of in his state of panic.

If not for his miserable life then please do something for them, they're still a mortal, they're still one of your children. Please god just save them.

Like always, no answer came.

Astarion felt hopeless, useless and small. 

He stared in horror at his own hands, still in the same praying position. He truly had nothing to offer.

Nothing except a dignified death.

Death would save them from Cazador, Death would save them from torture.

Death was what he should've picked that night almost two centuries ago. 

Careful not to disturb their peaceful rest, Astarion grabbed a pillow.

He took one last good look at them in the dark, he engraved their face into his memory.

He wanted to lean over and give them one last kiss. He didn't feel like he deserved to.

The pillow pressed against their face, slowly cutting off their oxygen.

Astarion held tightly. He kept his hold firm even as they struggled.

He couldn't take his eyes off of the pillow, his tears falling and staining its white cover. A drop after another.

As their struggles died down, by that time, he had gotten his side of the pillow entirely wet. He still held firm, despite his shaking fingers, despite the blood slowly joining his tears onto the pillow from how hard his teeth dug into his lips.

At these hours, the Szarr palace was the most silent. He couldn't risk making a single sound.

Only when a heartbeat ceased to exist did he let go of his grip.

He got off the bed, closed their eyes and covered their face with the sheets. He sat on the floor, head next to their cold dead feet.

Despite his clean hands, he swore he felt their blood on them, seeping into his skin and marking him forever.

Not just their blood, but the blood of every innocent miserable person he lured back into this hell.

He just wanted to save them, to save this one person. Take a life in stride and carry the guilt to the end of his days. 

It was just one life, one very precious person.

Was a very precious person.

But he forgot to account for the hundreds of lives he has taken indirectly before, it was easier to forget when it wasn't his own hands stopping their heartbeat.

His whole world felt like it stopped because of one life.

As he sat there on the cold floor, naked, shaking with tears streaming down his face, he heard the very familiar tapping of a staff against the floorboards.

All of his feelings vanished in an instant, as if he was drowning in a deep volcanic abyss before getting pulled into the freezing surface.

He could not feel his fingers, numbness spread throughout his whole body.

The tapping got closer. It was heading towards him.

Cazador was heading towards him.

There were no feelings left inside him, just pure numbness.

There was no taste to numbness, no colour, shape, or smell.

Just an absence, an emptiness. 

He couldn't escape it, no matter how much he tried. Much like total darkness, the abyss waited for him back home at the end of the day.