#I didn’t decide when I slept when I ate what I ate when I drank water when I could use the bathroom where I could be and when I could be the

[ricolaviecher]

Who's the dad

This is a Evan Buckley (9-1-1) fanfiction I have finally decided to post. It is the first or second fanfiction I have written in my whole life so this is probably bad. English is not my first language so there could be a few mistakes.

I hope everyone who reads this enjoys it. If anyone has feedback, I am open for it.<3

Summary: A few months after a one-night stand leaves (Y/N) pregnant, she unexpectedly meets the baby's father at a BBQ at her dad's fire station.

The blonde guy was hot, (Y/N) had to admit. His baby blue shirt lets his eyes glow in the most perfect way.

“So why are you here today?”, (Y/N) asked. They both had a silent deal: no name’s, no prying for information.

“Hard day at work”, the man answered. “You?”

“Hard week.” (Y/N) knew she was already drunk, but she ordered another tequila. In the afternoon, she brought her kids to their grandparents, Bobby and Athena. The reason she told them: I need the evening for drinking until I don’t even know my name anymore.

She knew drinking wasn’t going to solve her problem, but it would numb her for at least one night. It would make her forget the pain.

The man nodded, but she didn’t even know what she had said before.

They drank a few drinks together until both of them saw black spots dancing in front of their eyes.

(Y/N) knew it was wrong what she wanted to do know. She wanted to kiss this man. She wanted to forget why she was here tonight. She knew exactly how wrong it would be. How disappointed everyone would look at her. But screw it. She wanted him and she wanted him now.

She leant forward and pressed a kiss on his lips. It felt so right, but so wrong. It didn’t matter. The blonde deepened the kiss. The next thing (Y/N) knew was that they were in the man’s apartment. In his bed.

___

(Y/N) did her best to hide the baby bump – but it didn’t help much. Maybe she could tell everyone she has just eaten too much when they were in Europe. She hasn’t seen anyone of her family in the last 5 months. They didn’t know she was pregnant and they are not supposed to. Half a year ago she packed her stuff and drove away with the kids.

After her husband died and she slept with this stranger, she had to leave. She wasn’t able to stay anymore. She was ashamed of herself. How was she able to sleep with someone just some hours after Henry died? They weren’t always happy but she loved him. He had been her world. Until he was gone.

“Mommy? How much longer we have to drive?” James asked from the back of the car. He was the most impatient of her kids.

“Only around half an hour then you can finally see grandpa and grandma again.”

(Y/N) heard a sigh from her son and chuckled.

“Is there going to be cake? Is grandpa going to make pasta for us?” Cameron. She and James are twins and couldn’t be more similar. Both impatient and always hungry until they ate two bites and complain about being too full to eat any more.

“I don’t know. I have never been to a party at the station.” Nobody knew they were going to come. It was going to be a surprise.

Suddenly, Emily began to cry in her seat. The two-year old always slept in the car, but when she woke up, she always had a shock and started to cry when she noticed they were driving.

“Liv, can you please give Emily her pacifier?” The 14-year-old didn’t seem to hear her mom, as she had her headphones in her ears and scrolled through TikTok’s.

“Liv! Give your sister her damn pacifier!” Finally.

After two weeks in Europe, (Y/N) was already super annoyed. She tried to keep it cool, but it wasn’t easy to be with four kids and pregnant when she didn’t have her husband around.

___

Just a few minutes later, (Y/N) parked in front of the firehouse. She had been here before. Not inside it but she had dropped off her father a few times when his car was at the car repair.

“Ok! We are here! All out of the car!” (Y/N) picked up her youngest and followed the rest of the kids inside the firehouse.

She didn’t see many people downstairs, but around 50 people were upstairs.

“(Y/N)? Hey! You’re back! Where were you in the last few months? We tried to call you but you didn’t answer. We were so worried!” Bobby literally ran to her and hugged her as tightly as possible with Emily between them. “She grew up so much”, he said, reaching out to stroke Emily’s back.

“Yes. She absolutely did.” (Y/N) could see the worried and exhausted expression on her father’s face and immediately felt sorry for not even writing him and Athena a message that she and the kids were ok.

“May I introduce you to the team?”, Bobby asked after hugging the twins and Liv, who finally put away her headphones.

The 118’s Captain led his family to a bunch of people in uniforms.

“These guys are Eddie, Chimney, Hen and Buck.” (Y/N)’s breath caught in her throat. Fuck. The super-hot guy stood in front of her. With his uniform he looked even better that in his baby blue shirt he wore the last time. Why the fuck did she still remember what this guy had worn when they met in the bar?!

“Meet (Y/N), Liv, James, Cameron and Emily.”

“Hey! Nice to meet y’all”, (Y/N) said overly friendly, trying to hide the surprise, as well as Buck did.

“Grandpa? You have cake?”, Cameron asked Bobby.

“Of course. A party without cake isn’t a party. Come on, I’ll show you all.” Bobby led the kids away from (Y/N) and the team, over to the kitchen island on which many plates of cake were standing.

“’So… you are Cap’s daughter?”, a brown-haired man asked, who (Y/N) remembered as Eddie.

“Yepp, that’s me.” (Y/N) looked at Buck who looked just as surprised, as she felt.

“So, you are Buck?”, she asked him just as a try to build a conversation. She tugged gently on her shirt, as she didn’t want Buck to notice her baby bump.

“Uhm… yes. I am. Evan Buckley. So… these are your kids? You look quite young”, Buck asked and (Y/N) furrowed her brow until she realized, they haven’t talked about ages when they spent the night together. She was quite young for already having 4 kids. She had Liv when she was 16, but she barely told people, as she always got these judging looks.

“Yes, they are.” (Y/N) stared at the ground, unable to hold eye contact with the man she had a breathtaking night.

“Father’s not in the picture?”, Eddie asked and (Y/N) could see that Buck was relieved, that his friend asked the question, so he didn’t seem too suspicious.

“Um, no. He died 5 months ago. Car accident.” Instead of staring at the ground, (Y/N) now looked at the ceiling, trying to stop the tears, which always threatened to flow freely, whenever she talked about her late husband.

When she finally managed to make eye contact with Evan, she could see pain written over his face. Her husband died 5 months ago, around the same time, she slept with him. Had he been some kind of replacement? He knew they agreed to one night – no personal information, but it still hurt to know she didn’t actually feel the tiniest bit. She only had tried to compensate everything.

---

Around 3 hours later, in which the 118 got a small call once but came back after only one and a half hour, they all sat at the big table, because it was dinner time. Most of the time, (Y/N) stood on the sidelines, as she didn’t really feel comfortable around all these people she barely knew, and Buck. Nobody seemed to have noticed the baby bump which was covered under her shirt.

And now, (Y/N) even felt nauseous and had cramps in her lower belly. Her other pregnancies had gone quite well, except the last few months with the twins, but this pregnancy was terrible. She already had to go to hospital 4 times in the last 5 months, as she couldn’t keep anything down and had been severely dehydrated.

After only 2 bites, (Y/N) had to lay down the fork because she felt like she would throw up right away if she ate only one more bite. She had already thrown up breakfast and everything she drank today. She was lucky no one noticed she hasn’t eaten a piece of cake before.  

“Are you ok?”, the brown-haired man from before asked. Eddie? (Y/N) has always been terrible with names and couldn’t remember any. It took her 2 weeks to even remember Henry’s name after she met him, something he also made fun of, even years later.

“Uh yes. Just not feeling too great today”, she answered, trying to suppress the feeling to be sick. Her throat felt tight and her stomach felt like it was twisting and turning. The cramps were still present. She knew she wasn’t having a miscarriage as she once had one, and it felt different. The symptoms were pretty much the same, but she had another feeling. She had felt like something was missing, but this here wasn’t any better.

“You sure? You don’t look too good and you haven’t eaten much. Don’t you like the food?”, her father intervened now.

“The food’s great. Really. I haven’t been feeling my best today, that’s it.”

“Do you want one of the medics to take a look at you?” Bobby really seemed worried, but his daughter waved him off.

“Dad. Don’t make more out of it than it is.” Her dad made an acknowledging sound and (Y/N) thanked him silently with a small nod.

(Y/N) fidgeted with her hands, a nervous habit, she always did when she felt uncomfortable. Today, this many people were too much. She has never liked being around many people for a long time. She felt like everyone was staring at her and making fun off her or thinking of her as a disappointment when she did something wrong. Her kids were different, except of Liv. Liv came after her mom in these things, while the others luckily came after their dad and were the most social persons in this world.

Everyone looked at (Y/N), as she suddenly stood up, because a wave of nausea waved over her. As fast as possible she went to the restrooms, but only made it to the sink, where she threw up the bit of water she had managed to drink before. She rinsed her mouth and looked in the mirror. She looked like shit. Her skin was pale and her lips dry.

The door opened, and a woman stepped inside. She was around as tall as (Y/N) was and wore a wine-red shirt, that showed she worked at the 911 dispatch center. Had she been at the dinner table before? Or has (Y/N) just not seen her?

“Oh hey. Sorry. Just needed a break from out there. Who are you? I have never seen you here before. I am Maddie by the way. Chimney’s fiancé, Buck’s sister.”

(Y/N) raised an eyebrow. Buck’s sister?

“(Y/N). Bobby’s daughter. Nice to meet you.”

“Are you okay? You don’t look too well.” Again, this question. No, she wasn’t ok. But she didn’t say anything, so everyone should stop asking her. If she wanted someone to know she wasn’t well, she would tell.

“It’s okay. Just not feeling my best today.” Maddie nodded.

“Ok.” She didn’t pry further to get information, what (Y/N) was very thankful for.

“Soo. You are Bobby’s daughter? Athena has never mentioned, that Bobby has a daughter. She usually talks about everything.” Maddie furrowed her brow.

(Y/N) shrugged her shoulders.

“He doesn’t like talking about his private life too much.”

(Y/N) went back to the table, after she was sure she wouldn’t have to throw up again. But when she arrived at the dinner table again, she felt she was dizzy. Congratulations. First, she was sick and now she was dizzy because she didn’t drink or eat enough today.

She caught Bobby’s concerned gaze as he was looking at her, before everything went black.

___

“Heyyy! Here we go. You with us again?” She felt something painful on her chest and after a few moments she realized it was someone performing sternal rub to bring her back around. (Y/N) grumbled something.

When she tried to sit up again, there was a firm hand on her shoulder that kept her laid down.

“Damn, let me sit up if I want to. I am fine.” But (Y/N) noticed on her own how hoarse she sounded from being sick.

The hand suddenly disappeared from her shoulder, but when (Y/N) sat up, the hand was back at her back to steady her and kept her from falling over. Finally, she managed to open her eyes and caught look on the brown-haired man – Eddie. Evan sat directly next to her.

“We are just going to check a few things, ok?” All (Y/N) did, was giving an acknowledging sound from her.

The next thing she felt was a pulse-oximeter being slipped on her index finger and a blood pressure cuff on the other arm. She winced when Eddie inflated it and it squeezed tightly around her arm, which made her eyes well up with tears.

She had never liked the BP reading. When she was a kid, she cried freely as it made her arm feel like needles were jabbing it.

“Sorry.” Eddie was quick to deflate the cuff again after noticing the tears in (Y/N)’s eyes but she just shook her head to show everything’s ok. “BP’s 108/70. We are going to give you something to raise it again.”

“No! Wait!” (Y/N) frantically said. “I… I…” She made a sign for Eddie to come near to her so she could whisper into his ear without anyone hearing it. “I am pregnant but no one can know yet. I didn’t tell anyone.”

“Okayyy… I think we should go somewhere more private.” (Y/N) nodded agreeing.

Despite the other’s confused looks, they made their way to the locker room. Once they were there, Eddie began talking again.

“Has this happened before?”

“Yes, I already was in hospital because of it but it is just this morning sickness. I can’t keep anything down and it makes me dehydrated.” When (Y/N) looked to her right, she could see Buck looking at them but he couldn’t hear anything, right? He wasn’t as near and it was quite loud upstairs.

“Mhm. I want to hook you up on an IV if that’s ok with you? I don’t want you to be as dehydrated as you are now and I figure you don’t want a trip to the ER?”

“Yes, if that is possible, please.”

Only a few seconds later, (Y/N) could see her dad storming into the locker room.

“Sweetheart, what happened?” He looked kind of mad but also worried.

“Ehm… It is complica…”

“She is dehydrated because she didn’t drink or eat enough. She just wants to be alone for a moment and I can give her an IV,” Eddie intervened. (Y/N) shot him a thankful gaze and a tiny smile. She liked Eddie. He was really kind. She couldn’t think of any of her friends, who would do that for her.

“Mhm. Ok. I am going to call Athena. She said she would be here earlier. I’ll come back later.”

Bobby disappeared as fast as he came into the room.

“Thanks. For not telling him.” Eddie smiled at her.

“It’s not on me. And I think there are going to be better circumstances for that talk. How far are you?”

“5 months.”

“Ah. May I ask…”, he hesitated for a moment. “Is it your late husband’s baby?”

“No.” You didn’t know for sure why you told him, but he kind of let you feel calm and safe. “We didn’t… you know… the time before he died. We argued a lot. Had a one-night stand just a few hours after he died.”

“You know the father? Were you able to call and tell him?” Eddie looked honestly interested while he put an IV bag out of the medkit.

(Y/N) shook her head before nodding.

“I haven’t seen him… until today.” Eddie looked shocked and raised his eyebrows.

“Today? Is he here? At the station?”

(Y/N) nodded guiltily and looked at the ground when she heard Eddie chuckle.

“Damn, tell me more. Who is it?”

“Buck.”

“Buck?” The firefighter looked even more shocked than before and you nodded again.

“I didn’t know his name we agreed to ‘no personal information’. Why would I know he worked at my dad’s workplace? God… when he will find out he is going to be so pissed.” Eddie shook his head.

“Nah, I don’t think so. He will understand. And hey. You don’t have to defend yourself.” She smiled at his kindness.

She watched as Eddie swabbed the alcohol pad over the back of her hand.

“I would recommend to close your eyes if you are not good with needles”, he suggested. But (Y/N) couldn’t. She needed to see what Eddie was doing, even though she wasn’t good with needles. When the firefighter pushed the needle in the back of her hand, she let out a small squeal.

“Told you to keep your eyes closed but you refused to listen.” She heard Eddie chuckle. “Do you have any other symptoms I should be worried about?”

“I have cramps”, she admitted.

“Lower belly?” (Y/N) nodded. Why couldn’t she just have been home. She would lie on the couch and relax, but instead she was here, being poked and prodded by a firefighter.

“Can I take a look?” She nodded again. Eddie pulled her shirt over her abdomen and pressed his palm on different spots. (Y/N) looked upstairs, and froze. Fuck. She forgot that Evan was still standing upstairs, looking at the locker room. Looking at her.

Her eyes widened. Why had she agreed to this? Why didn’t she insist on being ok and went home? Why was she so stupid? She wanted to slap herself for not thinking.

Eddie seemed to notice her sudden panic, the pulse-oximeter, which was still clipped to her finger, chirped in high pitched noises.

“Hey, hey. Look at me. Deep breaths. What’s up?”

“B… Buck.” The firefighter looked where she was pointing at and sucked in a deep breath.

“Ok. That’s ok. We’ll fix that, after we are finished here, ok? It’ll be ok. Don’t worry. Try to breathe with me, the baby won’t like you breathing like that.” Demonstrative, Eddie took some deep breaths. “Do you know the gender yet?”

(Y/N) could tell that Eddie was only trying to distract her but she played along.

“A… girl. It’s a girl. Again.” She laughed. Her breathing became slower, steadier.

“That’s great. You already told your kids?”

“Mhm.”

“How did they react? Are they happy?” Eddie grinned at her.

“Y… yes. They are. James was a bit d- disappointed at first. H- he hoped he would finally get a brother t- to play soccer with.” (Y/N) smiled. “But the g- girls were all over t-the moon.”

The brown-haired man, put an oxygen mask over her face, which she tried to pull off, but his hand was immediately back, to hold the mask in place.

“Let it on, please”, he said with a look at the pulse-oximeter which was still chirping. “It’ll make it easier to breathe for you.

(Y/N) nodded, even though she hated the feeling of the mask, which made her feel the opposite of ‘easier to breathe’.

“Can I have a listen to the baby’s heartbeat?” After he had seen (Y/N) nodded again, he took the stethoscope and pressed the diaphragm to her belly.

“Looks good so far. The heartbeat is a bit fast for my liking but it’s nothing too concerning, just take some deep breaths, ok?”

“Copy, Firefighter Diaz.” (Y/N) took some deep breaths.

Just a few seconds later, someone stormed into the locker room. Buck.

“You… you are pregnant?” Buck hoped that (Y/N) would tell him it wasn’t his. That it was her husband’s.

“Yes.” She was surprised that her voice didn’t sound as high and panicking as she thought it would. She was scared. Scared of Buck’s reaction, which became even more clear, as the pulse-oximeter started to chirp frantically again.

Eddie took a look and was surprised how high the shown numbers were.

“Deep breaths”, he commanded her. But she couldn’t.

“Who’s the dad? Is it mine? Or is there a tiny chance, that it is your husband’s?” Even though (Y/N) thought something like that would come out of Buck’s mouth, she felt disappointment deep in her. She hoped he would not sound as panicked as he was now.

“Your’s.” (Y/N) fell silent, holding her breath in anticipation of what Evan would say now.

“Oh… wow. I have to admit that is a shock. Why… why didn’t you tell me? I could have been there with you.”

“I didn’t have your number, your address, your workplace. Not even your name! I didn’t even know if you lived in LA or somewhere else! What should I have done?”

Eddie put the oxygen mask over her mouth and nose, that she just put off again, but she immediately put it back to the floor. She didn’t want to breathe in the oxygen. It made her feel lightheaded and nauseous and gave her a headache.

“(Y/N)! Damn, breathe properly now the baby’s not comfortable anymore. Buck, I think you should go now and let her breathe a bit without the stress, this conversation puts on her.”

“No, he won’t go now! Not until this conversation is finished!” (Y/N) glared at Eddie. She wasn’t sure if that were the pregnancy hormones speaking out of her which have made her a bit temperamental these last few months.

“What do you want to do now? Buck? Do you have a girlfriend? Do you want to be a part in the baby’s life? Do you want to be part in MY life? I need to know it.” She could feel tears welling up in her eyes. Definitely the hormones which made her act strange at the moment.

“I don’t know exactly what I want to do now. But I don’t have a girlfriend. And I want to be part of the baby’s life. I want to be their father…”

“Her. It’s a girlie. Again.” (Y/N) could see Evan smiling a bit.

“Ok. I want to be HER father and spend time with her. And I think I would like to try to go on a date… with you. If you think you are ready. I liked you the last time we met, even though that could be because I had been really drunk that night.” Buck laughed and blushed a bit.

“I think… I think we can give it a try. I don’t know if I am ready for everything. But I do know I am ready for something. And maybe that could be with you.”

“Ok… uhm… great. And now you should really try to breathe properly with that mask. I know it’s not great, but even I can recognize how high your vitals are.”

She did as she was told. (Y/N) knew she liked Buck. He was cute. She wouldn’t have imagined to see a man like him blushing when talking about a baby and dating.

“I’m nauseous.” Eddie and Buck both looked a bit worried.

“Deep breaths. I think it’s just the IV and oxygen. I put some meds in the IV that should help with the belly cramps, that could make you feel nauseous.”

(Y/N) only nodded. She suddenly felt exhausted. The adrenaline of the day started to wear of.

“I think I’m gonna drive the kids home and we are going to relax a bit while watching some tv. Thank you for everything.”

“Wait. Stop. I won’t let you drive home alone. You don’t feel good and I wouldn’t like to know you don’t have anyone with you except you kids.” She nodded again. Evan was right. It would be stupid to not have anyone around her.

“I can come with you. Just if that’s ok with you.”

“Yes. That would be great. Thanks.”

“No problem. Shall we take your car?”

“Mhm.” She was thankful. She could really imagine Buck as a boyfriend. He is great.

---

“That doesn’t make any sense.” Evan laughed. He, (Y/N) and Liv were sat on the couch, watching a firefighter show, (Y/N) and Liv had been addicted to in the last few weeks.

“It doesn’t matter! This show is great!” Liv and Evan discussed about the mistakes in the show since around 10 minutes and it made (Y/N) smile. It was like a real family. Even though it hurt her a bit that it wasn’t Henry, sitting here. But let’s be honest: Henry would have never watched a show like that.

“That doesn’t change the fact, that you don’t use the saw like that. It’s just not safe!”

“Then just do not pay attention to the details.” Now, it was Liv laughing. (Y/N) hasn’t seen her daughter that happy in the last few months. She tried to cover up her emotions but it didn’t work completely. Her eyes started to burn and she felt a pressure building up. No, she wasn’t going to cry. Not in front of Evan. Her daughter. No.

“I’ll go to toilet for a moment.” She hoped nobody would notice she was about to cry, but her voice gave it away. She sounded hoarse and her voice broke at some point.

She locked the bathroom door and sank down to the cold floor, where she curled up, leaning her back on the even colder wall. Her hand was rubbing circles over her swollen belly. Damn it.

(Y/N) knew she missed Henry. She knew her kids have missed him every second since his death. But she was scared. Scared that moving on with Evan would make her forget her late husband. She heard a gentle knock on the wooden bathroom door.

“May I come in?” Buck.

“Ok.” Her voice sounded hoarse. She attempted to brush the tears away but it really didn’t work. Her eyes were still read, as well as her cheeks.

She got up to unlock the door, for Buck to come in. After he stepped inside the room, he closed the door again. He sat down next to her, and (Y/N) leaned her head on his shoulder.

“What’s up?”, he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Nothing.” Evan shot her a look, that said more than a thousand words.

“This honestly doesn’t look like nothing.”

“I don’t want to forget Henry. And I am scared. I have never had a relationship before him. And I still have cramps. And I still don’t feel too good in general. And I am scared of giving birth alone. And I am scared of everything else in my life.” Buck looked at her with a concerned expression and immediately pulled her into a hug as (Y/N) began to cry again.

“Ok. So, we first go to hospital, because these cramps make me worried, and then we can figure everything else out, ok?” He pressed a sloppy kiss on (Y/N)’s forehead, and she nodded.

“Mhm. But you need to help me get up, the baby is in the way.”

[betasquadx]

Movie Night - King Kenny

Request for @sexybarkbark because Ik you wanted a Kenny fic babes!!

Summary : You and your boyfriend Kenny decide that since he isn’t training, you should have a, cozy, chill, Saturday movie night !!

Warnings : None🫶🏻

———

You placed the popcorn in the microwave, grabbing a diet coke from the fridge,

well aware that Kenny still had to be careful what he ate and drank for boxing.

It was a Saturday night, and since it had been a while since yous had a movie night,

you both agreed tonight was the perfect night to do so.

While you didn't mind supporting Kenny's passion for boxing, it was a constant in his life,

keeping him busy most of the time.

So when he said he had two weeks off you had swore you hit the jackpot,

considering he normally only had a day off here and there, two weeks was a lot.

You carried the popcorn and diet coke to the couch,

snuggling up beside your boyfriend, who was already devouring a slice of pizza.

'I thought you were on a diet?' Grinning he replied, 'was.. on a diet.’ munching on another slice of pizza.

You chuckled as he reached for the remote to start the movie, all the while keeping his arm around you.

Yous settled in, relaxing and fully enjoying the movie.

It was a comedy, both you and Kenny’s favourite movie genre.

Sitting up he burst into laughter, grabbing onto you and resting his head on your chest, before you started

joining in on the laughter too, collapsing onto the couch, burying your face in a pillow in an attempt to silence my laughing.

We cuddled back up as he stroked my hair, both of us smiling.

He wrapped his leg around yours, resting his head on your shoulder,

both of you appreciating each-others company.

'Babe, I'm gonna go get some more popcor-,’ is what you had started to say,

until you took a glimpse down at your boyfriend, your words trailing off.

You grinned at the sight, stroking his hair, hearing soft snoring sounds coming from the man.

He had fallen asleep, which you didn’t mind one bit.

You understood how exhausting training could be, and he probably needed a good night's sleep,

considering he barely got one.

For a while, you just sat there, rapping your arms around him, while taking in every detail of his feature.

You soon realized it was getting late. Carefully standing up,

you fetched a pillow to place behind your boyfriend's head.

Grabbing a blanket, you carefully repositioned him slightly on the couch, covering him with the blanket,

and taking off his glasses, putting them on the table.

You stood up, lost in thought. You didn’t want to wake him up,

afraid that he would insist you continue watching the movie, and you knew how exhausted he was.

However, the idea of going to sleep in the bed while he slept in here, on the couch, felt unfair to you.

An idea overcame you, rushing inside the bedroom.

Quickly grabbing a pillow and a blanket before returning to the couch.

As you didn't want to disturb Kenny, and you couldn’t just leave him alone,

you had decided to sleep with him on the couch.

You placed a pillow on the couch, laying down beside your boyfriend, throwing the blanket over you.

You closed your eyes, smiling, wondering what you and Kenny will get up to for the next two weeks.

One thing you were sure of was that you'd be starting movie nights early.

———

Again another short one, I’ll try add onto it soon, as always please tell me if they’re any grammar mistakes🫶🏻

[cuddlepilefics]

Hi, it's me who wrote salembutnotthecat about writing a sickfic for The Rose fandom. So, my prompt is: Woosung getting carsick when going home after working the whole day recording a song in the studio. He decided to take a taxi to go home (Inspired by the actual situation when he got drank, took a taxi and had to stop it as soon as arriving on the Hannam Bridge. He got off and threw up everywhere.) but this time he gets sick not because of drinking but maybe he ate something wrong or got a fever. He gets too exhausted to drive so he takes a taxi instead... I just have this idea but you can alter the details in any way that is comfortable for you to write! If you haven't listened to The Rose yet, please give them a listen. They're amazing! Thank you so much. :)

Hannam Bridge

Prompts: Motion sick + professionalism failure + visibly ill + totally drained @monthofsick

TW: emeto, real person fiction

I have listened to The Rose and so far, my favorite song is "Sorry", "Red" following close on #2

Fandom: The Rose

Sickie: Woosung

No one’s POV.:

Woosung had already been exhausted when his alarm went off that morning. It felt like he hadn’t slept a wink but he knew that he had a full day ahead of him and couldn’t afford to roll over once more. His head throbbed when he set up, making him wince. Maybe a nice, hot morning coffee would ease his headache though it might not be the best idea to have one, considering he had to record a new song today. Woosung didn’t really feel hungry for breakfast, so he only got himself a cup of coffee, sleepily sipping the hot drink as he read over the lyrics on his phone. Before heading out, he knocked back a painkiller to soothe his headache, knowing he wasn’t supposed to take it on an empty stomach but he couldn’t bring himself to eat anything.

It was a decision, Woosung soon came to regret. His stomach was in knots but at least, the headache had improved a little. He’d spent the next few hours practicing the song and record it after lunch, so he could still hope his stomach would settle down till then because right now, there was no way the microphone wouldn’t pick up the rumbles. The other members all had their individual schedules today, which was usually fine but right now, Woosung wished he wouldn’t be alone but that couldn’t be helped. At least, Dojoon had texted, asking if they wanted to grab lunch together, since they both had their breaks scheduled at the same time. Woosung couldn’t imagine forcing any food into his stomach but maybe that was exactly what he needed to do to help it settle if the problem was coffee and medicine on an empty stomach.

By the time lunchtime rolled around, Woosung felt defeated. He didn’t like the way his voice sounded on the new song and didn’t know how he was going to record it later but decided that was a problem for his future-self to figure out. Dojoon frowned when the other plopped into the seat opposite him. “You good?”, he asked the leader, who tiredly rested his aching head in his hands. Woosung nodded but admitted: “Tired as hell and I have a headache.” – “Mhm, you’re pretty pale”, Dojoon commented. In his opinion, his friend looked visibly sick but he didn’t want to call him out. “Drank some coffee and had some pain meds this morning on an empty stomach, so it’s been a little unsettled all morning”, the older sighed, his stomach growling as if in confirmation, “I’ll just order some plain rice to calm it down and repent for my coffee-sin.” That made Dojoon laugh and although he felt so unwell, Woosung was glad he had gone out for lunch.

The rice had done little to settled the singer’s stomach, sitting heavily as he made his way to the studio. After getting set up, Woosung put on his headphones and winced at the pressure they applied on his head. Had the booth always been this stuffy? No matter how uncomfortable it was, he reminded himself to act professional and tried his hardest to do well as they started to record but it was hard. Every inhalation threatened to make his stomach cramp up and with his shallow breathing, his voice came out flat and forced. “Stop straining, your voice sounds forced”, came the producers voice over the speaker. Woosung nodded and gave a thumbs-up to show he had understood the instructions. That didn’t mean he’d manage to change anything about it though.

Somehow, today didn’t seem to be his day, Woosung acknowledged when the producer asked what was up because he usually did so much better. They agreed to take a five minute break during which he sipped some water and tried to quieten his racing mind screaming at him to be more professional. His hands trembled when he got behind the mic once again, the pressure mounting to do better. Woosung started to sweat but he didn’t know whether it was the stress or the lack of ventilation in the recording booth, that was already making him feel a little lightheaded.

Hours later, Woosung was finally done. No, he wasn’t satisfied at all with the way it had turned out but his throat hurt and his head throbbed, so he knew it wouldn’t get any better if they kept at it longer. Besides, he felt guilty for how long he was keeping the producer just because he couldn’t get his lines right. He had completely failed at being professional. The producer didn’t seem to be all that upset though, far more understanding than Woosung would’ve expected. While he packed up his belongings, the other even went to get him some tea from the break room, telling him to get home safely.

Too tired to drive himself home, Woosung called for a taxi and sat outside, sipping his tea. Getting some fresh air seemed to help temporarily and he weakly collapsed into the backseat, voice scratchy as he told the driver the address. If Woosung had felt like the recording booth had been stuffy, the car was a wholly different level. Within only a couple of minutes, he was sweating buckets, his stomach churning with every turn of the road. Of course, getting carsick would be the cherry on top of his already shitty day. Dreading the weird, fluttery feeling in his stomach, Woosung clutched his empty paper cup. He hoped he’d make it home without getting sick to his stomach, his throat already sore from singing all day.

They had just pulled onto Hannam bridge when Woosung’s stomach took a turn for the worse and he begged the driver to pull over, already gagging over the paper cup in his hand. For a moment, he got caught in his seatbelt as he tried to get out of the taxi but managed to free himself before pitching forward, the tea he had just finished splattering onto the pavement. Stumbling to the side of the bridge, Woosung clutched the railing and tried to brace himself against the dizziness. The next heave had him bent at the waist, acid burning his throat. His heart was racing as he retched up another bitter wave and struggled to inhale afterwards, his stomach immediately lurching again.

Woosung was glad that his hood had slipped forward over the upper half of his face when he had first bent over. Hopefully it’d conceal his identity because the thought of fans recognizing and watching him in such a pitiful state was enough to make his stomach turn. On the list of things he had hoped to never have to experience, getting sick in public was pretty far up. At least, it was already dark, so he could convince himself of his anonymity. That was the only comfort he found as his throat strained with dry heaves, body too exhausted to get anything else up.

Even when the heaves slowly tapered off, Woosung couldn’t bring himself to let go of the hand rail, his head spinning as his heart kept beating out of his chest. It was hard to imagine getting back into the stuffy taxi but he knew he didn’t really have a choice, since he didn’t want to waste the driver’s time and also because he truly wanted to curl up in his bed and be miserable in the privacy of his room. Staggering back to the taxi, Woosung gulped and forced in a shaky breath.

When he plopped back into his seat, he found a plastic bag and a bottle of water there, the driver sympathetically offering him a mint, which he gladly accepted, the taste on his tongue keeping the nausea at an all time high. Woosung dropped his head in his hands, totally drained. He could feel his blood pulsing in his head and it was only now, that he noticed how his cheeks had become damp with tears. His flushed cheeks felt hot against his hands and by now, he was pretty certain that he was running a temperature. There was no way his day could go so wrong if he wasn’t sick.

Woosung didn’t have the energy to check though, already glad that he managed to drag himself from the taxi to the safety of his own bathroom, where he promptly found himself retching up a mouthful of bile from the exertion of having to get upstairs. Merely rinsing his mouth and using some mouthwash, Woosung splashed some cold water on his feverishly flushed skin before stumbling to his room and crashing on his bed. In his haze, he only just remembered typing a message to their manager. The words barely coherent and with lots of typos, it was obvious how miserable he felt, already falling asleep with his phone in his hand as soon as he had hit sent.

[aetherdoesthings]

Hey hey! I saw your post about you being sick, and I hope you’re alright! It sucks dog water to have a sore throat and a fever at the same time so I do hope you’re alright. :)

I do have a request but please don’t do it until you feel better again aether.

Forthwith to the request, could you write about reader feeling overwhelmed and like Robin tries to give them affection but reader accidentally snaps at her because it just further overwhelmed them? (am having Robin brainrot right now 😭)

Again please just do this if you’re feeling better, no rush! Oh and you asked me to give you a nickname for me so I thought about it and I decided on lemon!

Anyways I hope you have a good day and thank you if you take this request 🍋🫶🏾

hey hey 🍋 anon! thank you so much 🫶🏻! i'm somewhat better now, so that's improvement.

forethoughts: i know i said in the last one i was going to be away but i tried to squeeze this one in before i leave.

notes: gn!reader

You don’t remember the last time you slept or drank or even ate. You were hunched over at your desk, hands cramped and shoulders screaming in pain. Your fingers were covered in ink, veins popping out of your skin as you tried to hold the quill in your hand. A stack of papers were set aside on the desk next to you, all covered in words you had written in the past days. There was so much work to do, and so little time. You were the scribe of the Straw Hat Pirates, documenting everything they did everyday. You always had a pen and paper in hand, jotting down everything they did and highlighted every key point. It was exhausting work; you never got a good night’s rest or had a day where you enjoyed being on the ship. But nevertheless, you did what you had to do. 

Sometimes you’d get a break, when the resident archaeologist would pop into your room and bring a tray of snacks and drinks, lulling you to sleep by making you rest against her body and making you hear her serene voice. You were always thankful for Robin’s actions, and always wanted to return her kindness. Whenever you asked, Robin simply replied by saying, “I’d like you to take care of yourself.” That was your dilemma. You wanted to lean against Robin and fall asleep, but you needed to work. Your needs came before your wants. 

Your head fell against the stacks of paper, which were taller than your shoulders. The muscles in your hands finally relaxed, the quill scraping against the paper. Five minutes. And then back to work. You told yourself. Your eyelids grew heavy, as consciousness started to slip away. It immediately sprung back as you heard a familiar knock on your door. Short long short--Robin was here. You didn’t have the energy to turn around, so you listened to the footsteps of the archaeologist make her way towards you. Letting out a sigh, you lifted your head, barely acknowledging Robin. Your body was forced to the back of the chair as Robin placed a tray of food on top of the page you were writing. There was all your favorite food on it, as well as your favorite drink. Robin took a seat on the chair next to your desk, looking at you with a disappointed look.

“You didn’t come out to eat today.” Robin commented.

“I’m busy.” You replied. You always said that. You could hear your stomach growling, eager to devour the entire plate of food. No, that’s not what you needed. That’s what you wanted. You needed to work. “I need to work. I need to focus.”

“Y/N… when was the last time you slept?” Robin asked, her voice filled with concern as she studied your face. Robin always did that whenever she was with you, nitpicking every detail and finding a cause for each. It annoyed you at the beginning, but after so many visits and trays of food, you’d gotten used to Robin’s cautious behavior around you, even though you never did anything to get rid of it.

“I don’t know…two days ago?” You mumbled, the thought of sleep causing a yawn to be ripped out of your throat. 

“Y/N… you should sleep.” 

“I don’t need sleep. I need to work.”

“Yes, you do.” Robin sighed, taking one of your hands into hers. Your hands were much more veiny than her smooth and soft ones, no doubt from writing all day. “Work matters less than your wellbeing.”

“Robin, we’ve been through this more than a hundred times. I’m fine. If I don’t do my job, then history will never get the right picture of us.”

“And we’ll go through this another hundred times if it means you’ll finally listen to me.” Robin said adamantly. “You know how much I love your work ethic and your dedication to your job. But there’s a balance you must draw between life and work. If you let work seep into your life, you’re not going to enjoy life to its fullest.” 

“And if I don’t do my job, then we’re fucked.”

“Y/N, please. I rather the future see us differently than see you suffering like this.”

“This isn’t suffering.”

“Y/N, listen to yourself. See that this is becoming unhealthy for you. You need to take a break.”

“Don’t tell me what I need.” You snapped, glaring at Robin as you removed your hand from her grip. You stood up, knocking your chair over as you pointed a finger at the archaeologist. “I know what I need. I know that if I miss even a single day that’s not written down, the people of the future will not be able to know who the Straw Hat Pirates are to the fullest; they will mischaracterize us. I am holding the Straw Hat’s legacy in my hand. If I don’t do my work, then everyone’s work right now will all be for nothing. Don’t you understand, Robin?! I have the Straw Hat’s legacy in my fucking hands. I need to be vigilant and write everything down. I need to work. I need to work so that Luffy will forever be the King of the Pirates, so that Zoro will be remembered as the great swordsman. I don’t need sleep, food, or water. I don’t need you to check up on me everyday just to see if I'm healthy. I don’t care if I’m not healthy, I care about my job. I need to work. I need to--”

You didn’t even finish your sentence before your body fell against Robin’s, legs turning into jelly, from the lack of food that went into your system. You felt like passing out, your head empty and floating with the clouds above. All your muscles immediately shut down; the wave of drowsiness you had tried to hold back hitting you like a truck. Robin cradled your body, holding you tight against her chest. You struggled against her grip, but in your extremely weakened state, you couldn’t do anything. Tears started to form in the corner of your eyes, realization hitting your head of what you just did.

Robin was the one who was always there for you, checking up on you everyday to make sure you were alright. She was the only one who actually cared about you and your wellbeing, not your work. And you had just dismissed everything she had tried to do for your sake. You ever ignorant and stubborn self had just pushed the only person that gave a damn about you. You clenched your eyes shut, gritting your teeth at your mistake. Teardrops started to roll down your face, hitting Robin’s shirt. You didn’t deserve her kindness. You didn’t deserve anything. You deserved to be shackled to a desk with a quill in hand for eternity.

But there were still hands around you, holding you tight. Multiple hands. Robin’s real hands were holding your head, her fingers interlocked in your hair as she held you tightly against her body.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry. I’m sorry for snapping.” You croaked out, resting your head against Robin’s shoulder. You found it harder to fight against the sleep you desperately wanted, but you had to stay awake. Let the gravitas of the situation force your eyes open. “I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve your care.”

“Yes you do, and stop apologizing.” Robin whispered into your ear, her warm and comforting voice bringing your heart to peace. “You’re tired. You haven’t eaten or drank anything. You’re always obsessed with work, obsessed with doing your best. It’s alright to want to do your best and want to give your best work. But Y/N, please recognize the state you’re in. Wouldn’t your health affect your work? If you had to write another paper in this state, would it even be as good as the work you put out when you’re at 100%? Your health matters too. Please, take tomorrow off. I will handle all your work. I just want to see you in bed with a full stomach. I need to see you in a bed with a full stomach. I can’t stand seeing you suffer like this because you think it would be the end of the world if you stopped working. You need rest. You need food. You need water. You don’t need to work.”

Her words sunk into your heart, as you swallowed a large and bitter pill. You closed your eyes, resting against Robin’s body. She continued to use her hands to soothe and relax your body, massaging your shoulders and back.

This was what you wanted.

This was what you needed.

You needed to be in Robin’s arms and forget about your work.

You needed to hear Robin’s words and listen to her voice.

You didn’t need work. You didn’t need to worry or be stressed.

You needed Robin.  

[lilcatdraws]

Crack A Smile and Cut Your Mouth

Ledger!Joker Origin Story

Chapter Eleven - I'll Take A Quiet Life

Warnings: None

Chapter Summary: Jack's daily life as a shell shocked former soldier, struggling to function.

Author's Note: Thank you so much for reading guys! We're down to five chapters left ☺ Btw this is several months later. At this point Jack has been in Gotham for almost a year.

Taglist: @alittlesmartcookie @furisodespirit

If you would like to be added to the taglist please let me know! <3

Nestled comfortably underneath his covers and clinging to his pillow, Jack slept peacefully. His curly hair was sprawled out on the sheets going in different directions. He wore a dark sweatshirt, his boxers, and purple socks. All that could be heard was the quiet hum of air passing through the vent on the ceiling above and his soft breathing. Such blissful sleep was a rare occurrence so he treasured every minute that he could get it. 

Sunlight peeked in through the curtains and streaked across his face, shining on the bridge of his nose and highlighting his freckles. The light hitting his eye brought him out of the comforting embrace of sleep and woke him up. He sat up groggily and rubbed his eyes, his messy hair falling over them. With a yawn, he climbed out of bed and went to the bathroom. He brushed his teeth while he was there, proud of himself that he remembered to do it. 

Jack decided to skip his usual morning workout and instead walked into the kitchen to make breakfast. He opened the refrigerator and scanned the shelves for something to eat, eventually choosing sausage and two eggs. He cut out two patties from the sausage roll and put them on a frying pan on the stove, turning it on and adjusting the heat.

While he waited on that to cook, he cracked the two eggs into a bowl and whisked them with a fork. Once the sausage was done, he used the same pan to cook the eggs and scrambled them, adding in some black pepper.

He moved the food to the table once it was done and grabbed some juice from the fridge. He didn’t bother with a cup because he would obviously be the only one drinking it so he just drank straight out of the container. Yet another sign of his growing carelessness. 

As he ate, he glanced at the calendar hanging on the wall from across the table and noticed some writing on the current date.

Oh shit, rent’s due today.

Shaking his head, Jack finished up his breakfast and put the used dishes in the sink. He went back to his bedroom to change his clothes so he could go downstairs to pay the rent. He had to get a grip. Whatever this spell in his life was, it was causing him to forget the most basic of tasks and he normally wasn’t forgetful at all. Maybe it was the military man in him but he liked being timely and getting things accomplished.

After he threw on something halfway decent, he grabbed an envelope filled with cash out from his junk drawer and his keys. He left his apartment and locked the door behind him, taking the stairs so he could avoid people. Once he was downstairs, he approached the landlady’s office and knocked on the door.

“Mrs. Vernon?” Jack called out, shocked at his own voice which was slightly hoarse from disuse. 

“Come in, dear!” The eccentric redhead responded. 

Jack opened the door and stepped inside. He had to really hide his reaction when he saw what Lydia was preoccupied with. She had her black cat on the desk and was measuring it. There was a pile of purple and orange yarn beside the cat so Jack assumed it was to make clothes for it. 

The landlady smiled and sat the tape measure down. “Just finishing up Sylvester’s measurements. Whatcha need?”

“Uh, rent’s due so here you go.” Jack said and handed her the envelope from his pocket. 

“Oh that’s right. Thank you, Jack. If only all my tenants were this punctual. Sometimes I have to pry it out of a few of them.” Lydia chuckled.

Jack nodded.

“Are you doing alright, Jack? I haven’t seen you out that much.”

“Yeah. I’m okay.” 

Ha. Lies. 

“If you say so. I’m here if you ever need anything. Just give me a call. Oh and you have mail by the way.”

Jack took a few steps towards the door and turned to leave. “Thanks, Mrs. Vernon.” He said over his shoulder.

He breathed a sigh of relief that the interaction was over. Another task completed. He walked to the other side of the lobby where rows of mail slots lined the wall. He found his and unlocked it. Inside it there was a check from the army he had been expecting for this month and a few envelopes of useless junk mail. He shoved them into his pocket and shut the slot back. 

He trudged back up the stairs to his apartment and got off at the third floor. Someone else that lived on the floor saw him in passing. 

“Good morning, neighbor.” She said cheerily.

“Morning.” Jack replied quietly and reached for his doorknob. 

He didn’t have any type of relationship with his neighbors and he didn’t want to, but being polite was the least he could do. Even if he didn’t feel like being sociable.

As he came in the doorway, he put the mail on the counter and the check in his wallet to cash later. Then he sat down at the kitchen table with a tired sigh. He wasn’t sure what he was gonna do today. When you didn’t work and lived alone it was easy to get bored. It made him restless. He liked the solitude but he needed something to do or he would go stir crazy. He had to keep his hands busy anyway because it distracted him from resurfacing memories and whatnot. 

One of the main things he did to keep himself occupied was keeping a journal/sketchbook. It was a brown hardback that he found while running errands one day. He would write entries about the day's events or his thoughts. Other entries would be drawings or doodles that came to mind. Sometimes he would glue things in or make a collage. Whatever came to mind, he put to paper. 

It seemed to work well enough. It kept his mind off things for a while. That was as good as it was gonna get. Screw therapy. It probably would have worked the exact same way, only more expensive and outside his space. Talking out his feelings to a stranger would cause him even more stress. So he stuck to the journal, deciding it would be a whole lot better in the long run.

Today he glued in some random pieces of the junk mail to make a collage, rearranging some of the words to make funny sentences. He liked to do that with newspapers too. Gotham’s papers were the best for that kind of thing with all their crazy headlines and bizarre stories. 

On the back of the collage he doodled Mrs. Vernon with her cat, Slyvester. He couldn’t get that mental image out of his head of her measuring her cat so she could make tiny cat clothes. It made him chuckle a bit. 

He closed his journal and put it and the art supplies away, after spending almost two hours in it. When he said the journal kept him busy, he meant it. He left the table and went into the living room. He plopped down on the couch to take a much needed nap. 

…

That night he made grilled cheese for dinner. Something simple so he didn’t have to put in much effort but still passable as a meal. After he ate, he laid down on the couch again to unwind for the evening. On the coffee table beside him, the radio was playing some old 70s rock tunes. He closed his eyes and just listened, drowning everything else out. 

The soft tunes emitted from the radio reminded him of his younger years. His mother would play records from Led Zeppelin or The Doors while they both cleaned the house. He smiled as he thought back on those days. The fond memories and soft music helped him to relax as he settled comfortably into the couch cushions. If he were allowed to smoke inside, he’d totally be having a cigarette right about now.

A combination of the relaxed feeling he had and his full stomach slowly lulled him to sleep. He sensed he was getting ready to drift off so he reached over and turned off the radio as his last conscious act before he succumbed to sleep. Within minutes he was out cold.

…

Several hours later Jack woke up startled from yet another nightmare. His heart pounded in his ears and he struggled to catch his breath. It was still dark outside which let him know it was still very early in the morning and not the right time to be getting up. Wiping the sweat from his brow, he sat up and scanned the room for reassurance.

You’re okay. You’re home. You’re safe.

He mentally chanted those words over and over to ground himself. Once he finally calmed down, he closed his eyes and tried his hardest to go back to sleep but he just couldn’t. After half an hour of trying, he gave up and turned on the TV to pass the time. 

At first a news channel popped up, which was discussing stocks for Gotham’s business world. Jack rolled his eyes and surfed through the channels until something decent came up. He settled on a kids channel that was playing Tom and Jerry. Nothing like childhood nostalgia to distract him from the terrible evil of the world that constantly racked his brain. 

More time passed and soon the sun crept in through the curtains, signaling to Jack that it was time to get up and go make himself something to eat. As he scoured the kitchen for food, he realized he needed to restock on groceries since he was running low on a lot of things. He outwardly groaned and facepalmed. The last thing he wanted was social interaction, especially after the rough start to the day.

He forced himself to suck it up, knowing that if he didn’t he wouldn’t have food. The best way to have a better day was to face it head on. He would be a productive member of society today. No if ands or buts about it. 

After he finished breakfast, Jack took a quick shower and got dressed. He made sure to fix his hair a little and brush his teeth. ‘Civilized’ people frowned upon the disheveled. He stuffed his keys and his wallet into his pocket and went on his way, locking up the apartment behind him.

When he was outside the building, he took a right towards the shopping center that was a few blocks down. He walked there since it would save gas. There was really no point in driving to somewhere so close. Mentally preparing himself as he approached, he entered the grocery store through the automatic door and grabbed a basket from the front, keeping his head down as he went. 

He walked through the aisles, grabbing the things that he needed and avoiding people when he could. Lately he found that the slightest things people did annoyed him. If someone got too close to him or if a group of people were in the same aisle he needed to be at, it bothered him. 

Then there were the times people actually did something to validly upset him. People had no mercy when it came to staring at him. It was bad enough that he was taller than most people and had this intimidating aura about him that tended to put others on edge. The scar was the salt in the wound. He saw their eyes. It was unmistakable what they were looking at. They would quickly look away and pretend like they didn’t see him, as if the very sight of his gnarled face would give them a disease of some kind. 

Pssh. Civilians were so easily startled. 

Jack grabbed the last thing he needed and dropped it inside the basket, relieved that the shopping part was over. Now came the hard part. He walked back towards the front where the registers were and got in line.

While he waited, he looked over each of the items in his basket and internally read over their labels to keep himself from getting too overwhelmed. That was one of the biggest reasons he hated shopping. Sure other people were annoying but it was extremely stressful for him to be out in public. 

It was now his turn in line so he stepped up and began unloading the basket onto the conveyor belt. As always he only spoke what was necessary to the cashier but maintained a certain amount of politeness. 

The cashier finished bagging the groceries and told him the total. Jack produced his wallet from his pocket and he took out some money, handing it to the cashier. She gave him a receipt and his change, wishing him a good rest of his day. Jack just nodded in response and grabbed the bags from the counter. He nearly made a beeline for the exit, glad to be away from that sensory overload.

While he was out he figured it would be a good idea to go ahead and cash that check he got in the mail. The bank was a few more blocks away but he didn’t mind walking. He reached the stone building a few minutes later and went inside.

He stopped at an electronic booth so he didn’t have to talk to a person. He took out some money to have as cash on hand and deposited the rest into his account.

Task two of the day completed. Now he could finally go back home.

When he got back, he unloaded the groceries and put them away. He noticed how messy his space was getting and decided to take action. Once he was done putting up groceries, he washed the dishes left in the sink and cleaned off the countertops. Then he tidied up around the living room and the table and swept the floors. The bathroom needed a touch up so he got to work on that. He also put the clothes lying on his bedroom floor in a laundry basket to be washed. By the time he was done cleaning nearly three hours had passed.

At this point it was almost dinner time and Jack was trying to figure out what to make. He pulled a box of pasta from a shelf in his pantry and decided to just wing it with some sort of pasta dish. He got the noodles started by leaving them in a pot on the stove to boil. While he waited on that he made a small salad to go with it, topping it with lots of cheese and an interesting looking dressing he found at the store. 

When the pasta finished cooking, he mixed it in with a tomato sauce he let heat up in a pan. Once that was done, he topped it with a little garlic and plenty of cheese. He moved to the table with the food and fixed himself a plate. The first bite was heavenly, a small reward for being productive today. He ate in complete silence as usual and relished in the peace and quiet. 

Jack started to get full after a while so he saved what was left over for later and cleaned up the mess in the kitchen. He put the supplies he used and tossed the dirty dishes in the sink. Just as he picked up a dish to wash, the pan on top of it fell with a loud crash, making him jump back and drop the dish he was holding. 

Instantly he was brought back to the battlefield. The loud noise rang in his ears, imitating the explosions. He covered his ears with his hands and got down on his knees, curling in on himself and whimpering in pain.

No matter how hard he tried to snap out of it, the illusion wouldn’t budge. All he could do was stay there on the floor and ride it out until his brain decided to leave him alone. 

After what felt like forever, the noise and the visions eventually subsided, leaving him shook up and struggling to breath. He felt a lump form in his throat and choked over the sob he tried to keep back but couldn’t. This attack came out of absolutely nowhere and scared him to death. Loud noises never bothered him that much before and he never thought of them as triggering. This was completely unexpected.

Jack hit his head against his hands and scolded himself. Stop crying, you whimp! It’s over now. Jeez, get a fucking grip.  He rocked back and forth, trying to calm himself and ride out the last remaining effects of the attack. 

Something had to give. This was getting ridiculous.

[alittlebitofeverythingtbh]

Staying In Bed

Corey Cunningham x fem!reader

Warnings: absolute fluff

Authors Note: This is a small chapter for the Corey series but I have had this idea forever. Guest appearance from my favorite boy aside from Corey.

You groaned as you smashed your face into your pillow again for what felt like the eighth time. You had woken up feeling gross and realized you had gotten a cold. Most likely from someone at work. No wonder you heard someone coughing all day two days ago…

Though Corey couldn’t take much time off work, he promised to be there later to take care of you. You had insisted that a cold was nothing and you would be fine, but he insisted on doing so anyway. “And plus, soup is one thing I can make that doesn’t burn,” he had joked. You gave in and said that he could come over.

You slept for most of the day, waking up to the sound of your bedroom door opening. You were greeted by your concerned looking boyfriend, who was carrying multiple bags full of stuff. You yawned and stretched, “what’s all that?” Corey pulled out multiple Squishmallows from the bags, putting them on your bed. He had picked out the burger named Carl, a winter version of Cam wearing a beanie and scarf, a winter version of Avery the duck, and your now fourth bigfoot who had a snowflake on her. You were grabbing them when Corey went out to the hallway and brought back a giant Gary, the giraffe. “I know you wanted this one,” Corey said with a big smile, “I managed to find a good deal for him.”

Your jaw dropped as he handed you the giraffe. Gary stared up at you with his small eyes and massive nose, almost looking like a slice of pizza. You couldn’t believe you finally had him. You looked up at Corey, “baby, I can’t believe it. Thank you so much.” He kissed your forehead, “it’s the least I could do. I thought it would help you feel better.” He sat down on your bed off to the side a bit before grabbing as many Squishmallows as he could, piling them onto the floor. You watched confused as he left your room and came back with one of your kitchen chairs, setting it near the end of your bed. You watched as Corey draped one of your extra blankets over the chair and the end of your bed, making a little tent.

Corey then placed one of your Squishmallows, Avery wearing a beanie, onto the chair. He held up Tina the tiger next to him before speaking in a high pitched voice, “Avery! Do you know how to make soup?” You grinned as you realized what he was doing. “I do not, Tina,” said Avery, “for I am simply a duck.” “Oh no! Who knows how to make soup?” Tina asked. Corey then grabbed Gary before speaking in yet another goofy voice, “I know how to make soup! I also know how to make pizza. I really like pizza.” You couldn’t stop the giggles coming out of your mouth as you watched the scene unfold.

Corey then had Gary and Tina pretend to make soup before getting up and heading to your kitchen. You didn’t need to be a genius to know that he was making some soup as fast as he could. Fifteen minutes later and he came back with a hot bowl of chicken noodle soup before placing it in front of your Squishmallows. “We did it, Avery! We made soup!” Corey said as Tina. He handed you the bowl and a spoon, smiling softly. You ate the soul and drank the leftover bits for turning to Gary, “that was amazing Gary. Thank you.” Corey held Gary again and made him nod, “of course! I will make more later, yes I will.” You laid back in bed, grinning. He placed Gary next to you before putting the other stuffed animals back in their proper spots.

“Thank you, Corey. I feel so much better already,” you said to him. Corey smiled, “anything for the love of my life.” He brushed some hair out of your eyes before leaning down and kissing your forehead. You were so comfy and happy that you fell asleep not long after.

Corey watched you sleep for a bit, happy that he was helping you feel better. Once he decided you were all good, he grabbed his keys and left your house, hopping on his motorcycle. He knew where he had to go next.

Corey was going back for more Squishmallows.

[ravennasgf]

A new path pt 2

Warnings: none  

It is the weekend now. I meet Queen Ravenna, Andromache, and Lorraine. I head to the modern looking castle in the middle opposite the storians Tower. I enter the castle and see all three of my new teachers there.

“Y/n?”

“Yes?”

“I’m Lorraine Broughton, but please call me Lorraine.” 

“I’m Andromache, but you can call me Andy,”

“You’re majesty,” 

“Please call me Ravenna,”

“As you wish, it’s a pleasure to meet you all,” 

~~~~

They take me on a tour of the castle showing me the training rooms, classrooms, bedrooms etc. 

~~

As time when on when I was at the other school I never slept in a bed. I constantly fell asleep in the library doing homework, history work from Ravenna or doing skills reading or techniques reading on how to kill and on stealth from Andy and Lorraine. 

~~

I finally got my finger glow which glowed a bright purple. I now had more magic, immortality and knew more ways to kills someone that someone should know. 

~~~ holidays

“Lady Lesso what’s the date today?”

“September 10th”

“Three days till my birthday” I mutter under my breath. I would be spending it alone and doing work

~~~~

Today was my birthday. I wake up from my sleep and my history books. I go to the bathroom and magic up a suit. Have a shower and change. I had history first.  I do my makeup and hair before going back to the library. 

Once I had arrived, I saw a note

All classes are cancelled for the day, but go to the garden at midday

So go back to my homework. For three hours, I sit there. I decide to take a break and go train. I use magic to change my suit to exercise clothes. I grab a gun and extra rounds and do some target practice then some practice in hand-to-hand combat with headphones in listening to ‘say your prayers’ by Blithe and more. I finally take a break and see the time nearing midday. 

I head to the shower using magic to dry myself and put on the suit I had on earlier the green one which thinking about it? Looks like Lady Lesso’s in another colour and then magic a full face of makeup. 

Being five minutes till midday, I head to the garden wondering two things who wrote the note and why I had to go to the garden. I arrive at the garden at exactly 12. I see lady Lasso standing there.

“Oh good you got my note,” she says 

“Yes, I did. Is there anything wrong?”

“No, I just wanted to catch up with you to see how you’re going. Come let's take a walk,” I can’t really say no not like I would anyway. We walk.

“So how are things at the other school?”

“Alright lots of work to be done,” I reply

“Which teacher have you stayed with?” 

“Umm, none,”

“ None? Why is something wrong?,”

“No nothing wrong. They’re all lovely. I’m just constantly falling asleep in the library whilst doing homework.”

“Y/n that’s not good. You need proper rest.”

“Well when you’re attending three schools at once with 3 to 5 subjects from each spending only weekends at one during the term there’s a lot to get done,”

“Oh y/n,” we arrive at the centre of the garden. I see a picnic.

“What’s this?,” I ask 

“It’s for you,” Andy’s voice says from behind me. I turn to face.

“We know what today is darling we didn’t want you spending it alone and not celebrate it happy birthday y/n,” Ravenna says 

All of a sudden, all of the teachers appear in a circle around me. 

“ happy birthday,” they all say sweetly they sit sweetly

“I-uh-I, thank you so much this means a lot to me,” 

We sat down ate, drank, talked laughed and played games. I grew closer with all the teachers though my favourites are still Lesso, Ravenna, Lorraine and Andy. 

“Hey y/n can you come here for a second?” Lorraine asks 

“Of course,” I walk over to her “what’s up?”

“I wanted to give you this,” she says handing me a small box. I open it and see an exact replica of her black gun. I smile. 

“Thank you so much Raine, this means the world,” I say, as I check the bullets. I put the clip back in looking at her with a smile. I took the gun into the waistband of my pants covering it with the suit jacket.  I give her a massive hug which she returns. We walk back over to the teachers.

I get pulled over by Lesso me hands me a box

“Lesso…” 

“I know what you’re about to say just open it,” she says and I do. Inside are the most stunning pair of heels. Black of course with swords on the heel.

“Lesso, they’re beautiful,” I quickly change out of my heels putting the new ones on. “They’re perfect thank you.,” 

She gives me a hug, which I return knowing that she will probably never do it again. I teleport my other shoes to my room  

Eventually Andy pulls me aside handing me a large metal box. I open it. Inside is a beautiful sword with a beautifully detailed handle. Underneath the sword is a battleaxe. 

“Andy they’re beautiful,”

“I’m glad you like it. I made them specially for you.”

“Oh Andy that makes them even more special. I will treasure them forever thank you.” I say I teleport the box to the library with a padlock on it. She gives me a hug. 

I’m so grateful to all of the teachers for making this day one of the best since I arrived here. The sun starts to so we begin to pack everything up before it’s completely dark. As we do so Lesso comes up to me. 

“We’re having an after party at the other school only me you Ravenna, Andy and Lorraine,” she whispers to me and I nod with a smile

We all had back to our respective schools after I thank them all.

“Y/n dear can you come with me?” I nod “Will be back in five” We walk to her room

“I have something for you,”

“Ravenna, you didn’t have to…”

“I know sweetheart, but I wanted to.” She says handing me a box. I sigh knowing she wasn’t going to listen. I open it and see a silver crown with diamonds.

It was stunning. I put the box down before jumping into Ravenna tears fill my eyes.

“Raven, you, this is too much. It’s beautiful.” I mumble into her shoulder as she wraps her arms around my waist. 

“Nothing is too much for you darling. Do you like it?”

“Like it Raven I love it. And I’m only wearing it on special occasions.”

We head back to the others. As we sit and drink playing games, let out of yawn.

“Come here, darling,” Raven says. She pulls me into her, so I’m sitting in her lap my head against her shoulder. For the first time in a long time I fall asleep feeling okay about my situation  

[allthingsfangirl101]

TOS Chapter 2: Definitely Not A Miracle

Masterlist

The day after Max woke up, Steve and Robin volunteered at the high school. The entire time they organized the supplies people brought in, Steve's mind was focused on other things. Mostly on Max and whether or not he should be at the hospital with her so she wasn't alone.

Every once in a while, Steve's mind would drift to the mystery woman who appeared outside Max's hospital room. He couldn't help but wonder who she was and, more importantly, what she was doing in Max's room.

Steve jumped when he felt a shirt being thrown at his head. He took it off, tossing it onto the table as he looked up to see Robin smirking at him.

"What's got you all spacey?" Robin's smile dropped when she figured it out. "Steve," she sighed, "you can't keep blaming yourself for what happened to her. We all knew Vecna getting to her was a possibility. She knew what she was getting into. We all did."

"I know," Steve mumbled. "That doesn't mean I have to be okay with the end result."

"None of us are," Robin said gently. "But Max is going to be fine. Remember what the doctor said? She should be back on her feet in a couple of days."

Robin went back to sorting through the donations. Steve couldn't. He looked around the room, seeing the faces of the other volunteers and the people they were helping.

"Steve?"

He looked up to see Robin looking at him. "Maybe you should head home," she sighed. "I can finish things up here."

"I'm fine."

"You look like you haven't slept in months," she said knowingly. "Go home."

"I'm good," he shrugged.

"Steve," she elongated.

"I told you I was fine."

"Go home."

"I don't want to go home," Steve confessed. "My house is empty and I look around, seeing all of the stuff my parents have and it makes me feel guilty. Our house is one of the only homes not destroyed by Vecna's insane earthquake."

"You shouldn't feel guilty," Robin said simply. "Think of how many times you've had the kids over, how many movies they've watched there, how many times the kids have ended up spending the night at your house."

"I guess that's true," he sighed. Robin watched him continue folding clothes before figuring that the best thing to do for him right now was to not talk about it.

So, she didn't.

Robin started rambling on about Vicki, but Steve's mind was still on Max. Whenever he thought about Max, his mind wandered to the woman he saw leaving the hospital.

The next week, Steve went back and forth between his job, the school, and the hospital. He couldn't help but feel like he was in limbo. He watched as people around him got on with their lives.

When Steve finally forced himself to go home, he walked into an empty house. He instantly went to the phone and called the kids. They agreed to come over and play their D&D game that was still set up on Steve's kitchen table but only if he ordered a pizza.

Just like he promised, as soon as he hung up with Dustin, Steve ordered a pizza. The kids came over, ate his food, and played their game. The entire time, Steve sat back and slowly drank a beer as he watched the kids.

As the pizza and sodas were turning into a sugar rush, Steve drove them home. As he drove, he looked at each one of them. He was willing to do anything to protect these kids.

A couple of days later, to everyone's surprise, Max's doctor announced that Max would be healthy enough soon to go home. None of the kids felt good about her going back to the trailer park, so Steve offered to have her stay with him. His parents went out of town when everything started. They wanted to drag him with them, but Steve knew he couldn't leave the kids. After a lot of discussion, the group still hadn't decided who Max was going to stay with.

The kids smushed into his car and they left the hospital after the happy news. Steve caught himself continually looking into the rearview mirror to check on the kids.

Steve pulled onto the main road in Hawkins with the radio quietly playing this week's top hits. He couldn't help but mentally plan to have Max stay with him. When Steve looked back at the road, something on the right caught his eye. He slowed down, his stomach jumping into his throat.

"That's not good."

"Is that. . . "

"That's the old Creel house," Dustin answered Will's question. Steve pulled over and they watched as the Hawkins Fire Department tried to put out the fire.

The kids started talking about the fire, Steve scanned the nearby crowd. For a brief second, Steve thought he saw something, a figure, behind the house. His breath got stuck in his throat when he recognized the figure. Ignoring the protests of the others, Steve jumped out of the car.

[brianyololau]

9-4-24

The last 4 days were wild, but I had such an amazing experience 10/10.

I’m glad I decided to say yes to this trip because it was unforgettable. The memories made and the experiences shared was just peak enjoyment.

I had missed the last 5 years of kazzy’s birthday weekend celebrations, so, I decided to go friday saturday since I was able to now. Ngl I was debating if I should’ve just went saturday since I didn’t really know everyone, and I would be spending two whole nights with them. But i’m glad I went. I told myself for the plot and the plot was THICK.

It was funny bc May called and said where tf are u rn as I was otw. While I was driving, I got the notification that there would be a HOUSE ROLL at 11:30 lol. I thought it was gonna be a night of drinking but nope. I said fk it anyways and rolled with them. When I pulled up, we went straight to drinking, and I caught up with friends I hadn’t seen in years. Everyone was all grown up lol. No more undergrad. Someone even bought a house recently. Then, the rolling began. Half of us popped, and there was a whole live dj schedule for most of the night. It was lit. Everyone was just vibing to the set having a good time while I chatted away with people and danced, real plur environment.

After the set, we played rage cage all night, and people started to go to sleep. I ended up staying up till almost 6, and we played some throwbacks. I did some drunkish karaoke for a few songs too. Couldn’t hang till sunrise, so I hit the hay. Heidi kept restarting rage cage. It didn’t stop.

The next morning, I slept in like a mf. I was a lil sleep deprived and went through 2 days of 8 hour live lecture trainings prior to coming. So, I made sure I was well rested. Surprisingly, no comedown or headache, but I woke up at 2 pm. After getting ready, I went straight to the kitchen to start cooking up breakfast, good ole bacon and eggs. Rene was making everyone drink though.. so my first meal was basically alcohol.

After I ate and drank some more, everyone came back from a pickleball tournament. We took group pictures, and I put on my duck themed fit. Shortly afterwards, we did a roll call for shrooms. It was interesting seeing everyone take the ones I supplied. Afterwards, we all dispersed, and it didn’t hit for a while, so I decided to use the restroom before the mayhem began. However, I ended up talking to Nicole for a bit, and during that convo, it hit LOL. Kazzy came in and asked if we were feeling it. We both said yeah, and I started laughing bc I was trying to act sober the whole time.

I decided to go out and sit by the pool with a couple other people in order to settle for the come up. There was a big palm tree in front of us, and I saw its leaves begin to sway. The weather was perfect, and looking at it felt so surreal. Looking into the distance, I noticed two moving objects. I thought I was trippin, but they were rabbits LOL. After a few min, I started to feel a bit overwhelmed and couldn’t sit still. So, I walked over to the edge of the pool. Randy was already in and suggested I jump in since I told him I wanted to see what it would be like to swim while tripping.

I was a bit unsure how it would feel considering I was still coming up but said fk it. First time for everything, right? Took off my shirt and cannon balled in. I’ll never forget that rush of water surrounding me as I went under. Emerging felt revitalizing, and then the cold temperature hit.

Randy asked how it felt to be tripping in a pool… I said it feels like i’m in a pool LMAO but it feels GREAT. The water was still cold after a few min, so I decided to swim across the pool. On the other side, there was a waterfall created by an overhanging beam. I felt myself gravitating towards it, and the sound of the water splashing into the pool seemed to drown the rest of the noise in the background. It seemed like everything else around me just faded out, and it was just myself and the waterfall in front of me.

I don’t know why, but it felt so spiritual to me. Everything drowned out including my own thoughts and anxiety from it all. It was just me and this enchanting water splashing into the surface of the pool. I saw something beautiful that was uniquely experienced to myself. I stood there for a minute appreciating the intense calmness it brought to me, and at one point, I started stretching my arms open to it. Finally, I turned around and looked at everyone else. It felt so freeing standing there and accepting everything in front of me. I was struck with beauty.

Eventually, I swam back, and the water became warm. Then, I went over to the jacuzzi which was nicee. I met this pretty girl named Aiko. Her fit was so cute. I complimented her on it later on. Then, Allen came out and pushed Kazzy into the pool. I ran over to make sure he was good since he was also tripping. Rene brought soju lol. I took some more shots, and bounced around just socializing. I was also tripping, so it was a lil hard to stay focused on the convos for too long. At one point, I picked up a bubble gun and started blasting it. It was amazing. In fact, I bought one for Zedd this week. Everyone seemed to love it including me. Being surrounded by bubbles while tripping is like being inside of fiction just watching them float around like magic. For the next hour, I kept floating around and enjoying the most beautiful sunset. The sky turned orange, and I was basking in the sunlight. I wanted that moment to last forever. That’s when I realized that this is what life is all about, to appreciate the beauty in life and share those moments with friends who truly care about you. That’s what I felt in that hour of light, and it reshaped everything for me, why we strive so hard, why we willingly take on stress, and why we make sacrifices. It’s not to push ourselves to the blink of oblivion and destitution. There’s no joy in losing that glimmer of life in your eyes. Everything is to KEEP that glimmer alive no matter what. Stress shouldn’t be controlling us, beating us down until we give up. We OVERCOME stress and utilize it in order to get to where we WANT. And when the stress is no longer fulfilling our purpose, we must walk away. That’s how we choose our battles and claim our victories. There’s no victory in battle lacking in altruism and self.

I’ll never forget that experience. It felt like the first time I opened my eyes and basked in literal happiness and beauty. I am grateful for everything.

After the sun went down, most of the people went in, and the party was going. There was a live dj, and everyone who didn’t trip had been drinking all day. It was overwhelming for me to jump into that when I had been so relaxed before. So, I stayed in the jacuzzi with a few other people. I got to know Brandon a little better, and he was such a great guy. 28 but with a 7 year old daughter and handling a full time job while hanging out with everyone. Love it. Stand up guy and I respect him for being a good father. Afterwards, I got cleaned up and went back out to chat a little with a few people. Mom called and asked what I was still doing out since I had WORK the next morning. I said i’d sleep there and go straight to work. That’s exactly what I did. When I went back inside, everyone was already drinking, playing rage cage, and dancing to loud ass music. I wasn’t really ready for that yet, and I missed dinner. Out of nowhere, I saw Brandon making ramen and hopped in right away. I started cooking up bacon and eggs. Brandon made sausages, and we put together some scrappy meals I was honestly so proud of. He was too, and it was bomb. While we were doing that, Kazzy took 10 shots back to back for his yearly birthday challenge, and everyone recorded.

At this point it was around 8:30 pm, and I knew I had to prepare myself for another rally if I wanted to keep partying. The problem was I had to leave at 4 am and go straight to work. I was staying up after for another 12 hour shift back to back days. I didn’t think I would’ve been able to survive another rally without taking addy and a bunch of caffeine the next day. So, I decided to take a nap. I was scared I wouldn’t wake up or make it back in time, and to combat that, I kept setting alarms for 30 minutes. Eventually, I just slept until 4 am because the sleep was good. Also, I didn’t want to be too inebriated and have trouble leaving by 4 am for work. It worked out pretty well because I handled the next two days pretty well. However, I did miss out on the second rally. In retrospect, I could’ve stayed up another 2 hours during peak time, but knowing me, there’s a chance I could’ve slept through my alarms if I was too sleepy. Didn’t wanna take the risk.

I really miss everyone, although, I only knew a lot of them for a short while. It was just the acceptance and fondness we had for each other in such an emotional space that I ended up appreciating everyone for vibing with one another. It was so wholesome and not at the same time. I will definitely be back for the next one. Newfound friends!

Yesterday, at work, I received my first ICU level patient that I had to stabilize. I was doing everything critical care. I was messing with central lines, bolusing bags of saline, doing septic bundles, and hanging levophed. It was real nursing. I’m glad I had that experience because I learned a lot on how to care for critical patients in the medical field. The only thing I gotta practice now is ACLS and mastering rhythms.

Overall, this was genuinely an amazing week. Despite the fact that I had 4 days of work in between the 1.5 days at Kazzchella, I feel I truly made the best out of every second of it. I ended it with unforgettable memories, new friends, wiser reflections, and fulfillment of my immediate responsibilities. I’m proud of myself!

[aeadventuretime]

31st May - 1st June 2024

Travelling to Rome.

Who knew I’d hate flying 200x more with a toddler in the mix. Just like lining up to check bags, go through security and all that was a nightmare! Roman was tired and feral and just bolting through all the barriers and off limit areas and just tantruming in my arms when ever I tried to stop him. Anxiety level 5000. At least he is cute?

We got to the airport a little early and went to the lounge to just chill and get some decent food, and let Roman have a squiggle and a sleep before our flight at 2:45. The lounge had a kids section and was Plato g paw patrol. And just the excitement in general meant Roman did not have a nap. But that was ok cos maybe it meant he would sleep on the plane.

We got on the plane and took off, Roman was entertained by some weird dog show on the plane entertainment system. SO MUCH TIRBULENCE! Literally gasped out loud numerous times. Broke Ashley’s hand squeezing it. And was certain we were going to die. Spoiler alert. We didn’t!

Roman got his own kids meal which he basically ate none of and ended up eating Ash and my pasta. So Ash and I went hungry. Roman started getting overtired and feral again. It was getting close to 10pm. Roman hadn’t slept in 15 hours. Finally he fell asleep but woke in hysterics 40mins later much to everyone around us’s dismay. So paw patrol went on and eventually he fell back asleep and maybe got 4 hours total. Meanwhile Ash and I watched half a movie. The iron claw. There was no second movie Nyssa. Cos I know you would ask. We watched like nothing, we ate nothing, we drank nothing, we didn’t sleep. Flying with a toddler is a very different experience 😵‍💫

We had a four hour stop over in Abu Dhabi, which was perfect time wise. Just enough time for Ash time grab a burger. Go for a walk and meet some camel statues, Roman loves Alice the camel so this was a win for a very tired 2 year old.

Second flight Roman fell asleep with minutes. Ash and I both managed to doze off. We woke what we assumed was 4 hours later. It had only been an hour. So over flying at the point and Roman was busting with energy, jumping and climbing and throwing things everywhere. Finally we landed, sped through immigration cos we had a bambino. Got a taxi to our hotel which is literally 7 mins from the colosseum. It was 8am and check in was at 2pm and we couldn’t get in earlier so we headed to the colosseum to look around. But before that we were told we could head up to our hotel roof for our complimentary breakfast! So we did! It’s the cutest little spot with a view of the colosseum. We got our first delicious coffee in forever, and a whole heap of pastries and fruit and juice. Fuel for us to head out for the day!

Roman was obsessed with the cobblestone paths. And of course this is when he decided to poo (after 3 days of none). So very stressful hour for him trying to do that and us finding places to change him and quickly running out of nappies.

We found a park and decided to just hang out there, we found a playground Roman loved, so much so that we had to bribe him to leave by saying we would find ice cream. We bought 2 ice creams to share. Roman ate both. When in Rome? Roman full of sugar was in a much better mood so we ventured around the park which was full of ruins. But Roman didn’t care. He remembered we had mentioned there would be cats so he was on the hunt. And guess what?! He found 3! He ran after them which gave Ash a heart attack cos rabies, didn’t help when Roman grabbed the cats tail as it tried to run away.

We were all exhausted when the hotel finally called to say our room was ready, I had to carry Rome all the way back. He was so tired. Finally making it into our room we all had a nap and woke 2 hours later.

Even though we were all tired we knew we should head out to keep us all awake so we headed to the Peroni brewery. Again had to carry Roman the whole way, I’m getting quite the workout. We grabbed a table and ordered our first pasta of the trip and got Roman some sausage and chips. Which he loved! It was a cute little Italian brewery/restaurant! We couldn’t stay too long cos Roman was tired and close to losing it, but we managed to get him to leave with the promise of ice cream. I promise we are better parents than this in Sydney. So off we went in search of gelato! Finding a little corner store we grabbed him a cone and sat of some stairs where he enjoyed his ice cream and pointing out all the pigeons, cos apparently we don’t have them in Sydney and they are therefore very exciting to find here. We carried him home and just chilled out. It was only an hour until we would try to get him to sleep. We have a family room with 2 giant beds and a cot set up for us. Roman fell asleep in the cot but woke 2 hours later and we brought him in bed. He slept from 7pm till 2am and we honestly thought that was going to be it for the night. But then after an hour he fell back asleep and slept through till 7:30am. Best birthday present ever for Ash who also managed to get 12 hours of sleep! So I guess the lack of sleep on our trip paid off and kind of helped with the jet lag!

[strawberryspeachy]

Partical thanks to the universe but also why you gotta fuck me like that.

I watched some show where the characters made out and I was like UGH PLEASE give me a hot guy to aggressively make out with.

And almost immediately a hot guy talked to me at the club. I talked back.

I hoped he’d take me to a hotel because I don’t bring randoms to my room but he is a student and it didn’t seem like he was exclusively after sex and he never brought up hotel but he asked to to back to my place.

I wanted him to come. Make out with my on my floor because i dont sit in my bed without a shower AND LEAVE

No. He bought some street food. We ate and drank and watched Spiderman on my floor. Then he started cuddling with me. Still no kisses. I wanted to make out.

After a couple hours of him trying to get to my bed we both took showers and got in my bed. We did make out. Thats all I wanted. To make out.

But then he stayed. He slept next to me. Was all cute and shit.

I said no to sex.

But as soon as they start saying sweet shit to me and reminding me how much I want someone in bed next to me I’m fucked.

And he stayed. And stayed. And stayed.

We came to my room around 5:30. Got in my bed around 7:30.

Also he left my fucking shower running. He used my expensive shampoo. And he used my conditioner i brought back from the states 😡

I thought he’d leave in the morning. Nope.

Surely he’ll leave in the afternoon. Nope.

I guess he’s waiting something out and will leave around 4. Nope.

He started looking for uber eats.

I started thinking. Wow! He must actually really like me. He’s staying for a long time. I guess we’ll spend the night together.

Then he decides after he orders food that he’ll go home and eat with his family at 6:20

Like i thought he’d leave when I said no to getting in my bed. And I kinda expected him to leave while I was in the shower.

I kept expecting him to leave and the second i thought he’d stay- he left

I wanted to make out. That’s all. Now I’ve caught feelings. That’s not what I wanted.

ESPECIALLY because after he told me he was going out with only his male friends a day later and that he would message me a lot.

I saw him with a girl. He says thats his friend but. Ehem. And he doesn’t message

Now his story is that he was too drunk (from fucking 6 to 4?!?! No.) he doesn’t remember what happened. He wasn’t himself because he was drunk. He doesn’t like to message or hang out pretty much at all.

WHAT THE FUCK UNIVERSE.

[misteriios]

date: july 21, 2023, around 10am.

notes: reunion with her family, only the kids. they appeared up in washington d.c. without knowing how, like everyone else. brianna meets them when she is out running. they ran away from their dad, could not find him again and somehow ended up here.

the blanket fell down on the floor, a brief second later a groan escaped the redhead woman’s lips. new day opportunities waited around the corner. in her case, more work. doesn’t matter if she has a few days off from studying, she still wanted to do something that could keep her brain active. bree sat up, stretched up her arms and moved her head to the right and left. let out a yawn before taking up the blanket from the floor. she stood up, rubbed her eyes and walked out to the kitchen. everything went automatically, a cup stood under the coffee machine. she always prepared, so she can leave the apartment as soon as possible.

every morning she went out for a walk or a run, whatever she feels when she wakes up. it all depends on her emotions a day earlier or how she slept. today she decided to run. it could be a long way, she needed a lot of coffee to open her eyes. the minute the machine told her it was fine, she grabbed the cup, drank a sip to not burn her tongue. started to make the breakfast while the hot beverage cooled down.

brianna turned the spoon in the cereal bowl, started thinking of her children. of course she misses her husband, but her children were she worried about. roger always could take care of himself, if he disappeared they had no one. her parents too, they were fine by now. reading the letters from them hurt her even more, knew they would not be alive, she didn’t give up hope. they were out there somewhere. either alive or as ghosts. maybe was it true that her son could see her father.

❝ i miss you mom and da. wherever you are, i hope you are okay ❞ she said out loud, drank up the coffee and ate up the cereals. moving out the chair, bree grabbed the bowl and cup and placed them down in the sink.

the dishes can she worry about later. she went into the bathroom, quickly washed her face. a tired face looked back at her in the mirror. with a smile to herself, she went out to the bedroom to pick out the training clothes from the closet.

this was the first day she wasn’t excited for a run. she didn’t know what bothered her. brianna shook off the thoughts, the negative ones. in the hallway, a few minutes later, she took the keys and put down the phone in the arm band. focused on to just be in the moment.

she looked over at the clock she had on the wall, it was 10am soon. not the time she planned to start the day, usually she went out early in the morning, before 7am. a sigh escaped her lips as she stepped out from the apartment, locked the door behind her. when the sun hit her face, a small smile spread across her face. at least the weather was still alright. something positive to start with.

brianna ran past a few stores, unsure where she was going. doesn't matter. she had all the time in the world. barely planned where she goes, as long as she is outside. passing by the white house, she stopped abruptly. familiar faces could be seen in the distance, her eyes narrowed as she tried to see, the sun was too bright. the redhead walked closer, before she could think. small arms were around her legs ❝ mommy ❞ a little girl cried out. she looked down at her, frowned ❝ mandy, w-what are you doing here? ❞ she recognized the voice, it was her daughter's, but she couldn't see jeremiah anywhere, asking about it, amanda pointed to the corner of the white house. he tried to climb on the fence. bree took mandy's hand and walked over to her son ❝ stop with that, jemmy. how are you and sister here? ❞ she asked him instead because the little girl didn't answer. jeremiah explained that they were out with their father, roger, searching for their mother. roger had only turned around a few seconds, and the kids were gone. the redhead woman was happy to see her children, to know they were okay. at the same time was she worried about her husband, how he would react, if he was still at home, or what had happened to him. knowing him, she knew she doesn't have to worry, she could not help it. when it comes to her family, they mean everything to her and all she wanted for them was to be safe.

now two of them were, her children, the ones she always worried about because they could come up with all kind of troubles. brianna smiled to them, grabbed both's hands and started to walk home.

❝ i am happy the both of you are safe, but i am not happy you ran away from your dad. he must be worried now and you know how he is when is ❞ a soft giggle escaped her lips.

her life had changed to the better. even though it wasn't always easy to take care of the children, she was glad she knew where they are now.

[orchestrahearts]

since i did this for april, i feel the need to do this for a few of my other muses who lack epilogues. first up is mel. here’s a catch up post on what happened to her after into the woods.

So for some reason lots of interpretations of Into the Woods have the Witch just inexplicably die at Last Midnight. One version literally has her dragged down to hell, presumably by her mother. Not only do I find that a little weird, I’m not condoning spontaneous magical suicide here. I took influence from the original draft of Last Midnight, “Boom, Crunch!” In that, she straight up says she’s leaving. Although she no longer has magic, I see her dramatic exit as some kind of teleportation. I decided more recently to steal the concept OUAT did where the beans themselves could magically teleport you. So that’s what happened when she left.

After leaving the woods, Mel was kind of lost. Her home that was in her family line for generations was gone, along with the garden and all the rare and valuable things the property contained. She had no one, as the only person she cared about was killed. For a period of time she sunk into a deep depression. She drank, sometimes ate, and slept. People weren’t sure what to make of this strange, pretty, unfriendly drifter.

Following quite some time spent in her depressive slump, Mel finally decided it was time to move on. She didn’t know where she would go, what she would do next, but it was time to do something. She’s relatively immortal so she had centuries to live still unless something else decided to cause her untimely death. She left Germany for France, where she moved about within the country until deciding to leave for England, repeating this process and ultimately, America.

In each city she settled in she set herself up as a florist, growing the most spectacular plants, because although her magic was gone, she still had an unearthly ability to foster plants. Her blooms were always flawless, emitting the most heavenly of aromas. Not only that, they took weeks to wilt and were still were beautiful even then. Her success, despite a lack of customer service, has allowed her a comfortable life. She’s not particularly happy in her life, but she’s trying to find contentment. She’s still extremely antisocial but in this modern day and time, she can’t find an easy way to get a nice property where she can live alone, unbothered. Government records have also been making things more difficult with her these days, since she doesn’t age.

[srvphm]

it’s 3am and I’m thinking about how I have thousands of scars that my body will bear for the remaining of my life and I got almost all of them within 5 years of my life

[heich0e]

Wakatoshi Ushijima. 🤍

division ushijima/reader (haikyuu!!) word count: 1.1k tags: angst, mentions of alcohol/intoxication, mostly a drabble but she got long, ushi :-( beeg man trying his best :-( a/n: I HAVE BEEN SITTING ON THIS ASK FOR A WHILE IM SO SORRY!!

“Have you been drinking?”

You weren’t expecting to hear anyone else’s voice as you looked out over the dark shapes and dotted lights of the city skyline so late at night, and your head turned towards the sound in surprise.

It was your neighbour, Ushijima Wakatoshi, the professional volleyball player who, following a breakup, had decided to move into the apartment next door since it was near the Tokyo arena his team called home.

His deep voice drifted from his balcony onto yours over the divider that kept the two of them separate and private – but you knew there was no one else he would have been out there speaking to at that time of night, even if you couldn’t see him.

“Yeah, a little,” you replied, laughing in spite of yourself.

‘A little’ might have been an understatement: you’d stumbled through the door to your home a few minutes earlier after a long night out with friends. You’d only been home long enough to kick off your uncomfortable heels and grab one last beer from your fridge to cap off the night when you’d spotted your balcony door ajar on the other side of the apartment – you’d forgotten to close it before heading out for the evening. As you were in the process of securing the sliding door shut, you’d decided to step out and enjoy the view for a moment and finish off your drink before you'd retreat back inside to finally collapse into your bed.

Which is how you found yourself chatting with your neighbour so very late into the night, the muted noises of the midnight city rising to meet you both as you stood in the breeze.

You didn’t have the best view in Tokyo by any means; you weren’t in a penthouse or even a lofty high-rise. But you so rarely took the time to appreciate what view you did have – that had been the thought which had inspired you to step over the threshold into the cool night in the first place.

“How’d you know?” you asked, taking a sip from the bottle between your fingertips, eyes still intently tracing the shadowy cityscape before them.

“I heard a noise through the wall, it sounded like you may have fallen,” Ushijima replied as plainly as ever.

You’d quite literally stumbled through the door, and that was likely what your neighbour had heard.

You snorted, unbothered by the fact you should probably have been embarrassed. “Tripped on the genkan step.”

“Ah,” Ushijima responded in his usual flat, deep tone. “Are you injured?”

“No, I’m fine.”

You were leaning against the railing of your balcony, and the large pair of hands and forearms you could see dangling over the railing in your peripheral told you he was mirroring your stance. The divider blocked your view of everything else.

You heard him sigh, a tiredness seeping into the end of the sound as he breathed it out into the cold night air.

Because he was your neighbour, Ushijima Wakatoshi, who by all accounts should definitely have been asleep at that time of night.

He spoke again, having seemingly come to the same realization as yourself: “It’s late.”

“You’re one to talk,” you replied softly. “Isn’t it past your bedtime?”

Ushijima was a perpetually early riser, and his lights were always out by nine o’clock each night.

“I don’t have practice tomorrow,” he offered up as explanation.

You noted that he didn’t say he had the day off – because he never had a day off. On the rare occasion he doesn’t have physical training, he still went running, or to see his personal trainer for one-on-one coaching. Even if by some miracle he didn’t have any physical obligations – be it due to illness or injury or inclement weather – his role as a professional athlete meant that he still had to carefully monitor every kilocalorie and macronutrient he ate, how much water he drank, and how many hours he slept for; the work was endless.

Ushijima was committed to his sport beyond the degree that most people would ever be committed to anything in their lives.

“You should be heading to bed; you’ve been out late.”

“I’ll get there eventually,” you replied, sparing him the details of how you had been on your way there before you’d ended up outside at that time of night, because he probably already knew.

Because he was your neighbour, Ushijima Wakatoshi, whose gently chastening voice was usually the one that reminded you not to leave the balcony door open before you left the house.

“Make sure you hydrate yourself properly before you go to bed.”

“I am hydrating myself,” you said.

Suddenly his head popped around the divider, olive eyes on a chiselled face that didn’t have any right to be as pretty as it was. His hair was fluffy and a little bit tousled, like he’d only recently dried it after a shower.

His eyes flickered to the drink in your hands.

“Beer does not count.”

“Right,” you said, tipping the bottle towards him as though in cheers. “Same number of carbs as two slices of bread, right?”

You’d heard him say it before.

You took a long swig.

“I’m referring to hydration,” he said, forearms bracing against your balcony railing as his broad shoulders curved around the wall to further angle himself into your space. “You need water – electrolytes ideally. Would you like a bottle of sports drink? I have some ins-“

“Toshi.” Your voice was meek, strained even.

It was too much. Too familiar. Too painful.

Your eyes squeezed shut.

He paused, realizing he’d overstepped.

When you opened your eyes again, he’d retreated back behind the divider, but you could tell he was still there. You approached the wall quietly, resting your forehead against it – cool metal meeting liquor flushed skin.

You couldn’t help but wonder where he was standing on the other side – on his side – only a few inches of metal and plastic drawing the line of what was yours and what was his.

You wondered if he was in the same place you were, pressed against that barrier.

You wondered if he wished that there wasn’t a wall between the two of you, too.

Because he was Ushijima Wakatoshi, who used to call the same side of the balcony you were standing on his.

Because he was your boyfriend long before he was your neighbour, after all.

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

Inner City Blues

Syverson x Fem!Reader

vignette: Ethan Syverson was a country boy through and through. But maybe there's one woman who can finally convince him to give the city life a chance.

words: 6,500+

a/n: once again, shoutout to @just-chirpin for her help.

masterlist

Syverson didn’t know what had come over him.

The only thing he understood was that he missed her.

God, he fucking missed her so much.

It had been just over a month since Y/N had left.

And Syverson’s life had gone to shit. He hadn’t slept a full night since. He was in such a foul mood, that his workers on the farm tiptoed around him. His friends didn’t tease him when he drank twice as much when they went out. Other women were practically invisible to him. He ate the same meals every day because it all tasted bland to him anyway.

Now Syverson stood at LaGuardia airport, waiting in line for a cab.

He had to ask Layla for Y/N’s address in New York City. And to his surprise, she didn’t say a word or ask a single question, just gave him a sympathetic look as she wrote it down and handed it to him.

It was a Saturday morning. Traffic wasn’t great. As soon as Sy’s cab pulled away from the airport, he was met with pollution and noise.

He didn’t realize he was holding his breath in until he saw the city’s skyline and he let out a giant exhale.

In that moment, he understood. He understood what drew people here, that other places couldn’t give them. Hell, there wasn’t anything even remotely similar in Texas – not even in the major cities.

When the cab pulled over, Sy handed the driver a wad of cash and tried not to think about how much a 20-minute ride cost.

Sy looked up at a sixth-floor walk up. He knew Y/N lived on the third floor, and Layla gave him the apartment number.

Fuck. What if she hated that he came?

Why hadn’t he thought of that before making such a ridiculous, spur-of-the-moment decision?

That wasn’t like him. Sy thought through everything. It was what he was trained to do and what had been conditioned into his already prepared personality.

But he was also trained to ignore his fear, to fight through it.

Sy buzzed 3C.

There was no answer.

Maybe she wasn’t home.

Sy decided pretty quickly that he was just going to wait.

So he sat on her stoop, laying his duffle bag at his feet.

He told himself he’d give it an hour. Any longer, and he would feel like a creep.

Y/N was her own woman. She didn’t owe him anything. It’s not like he told her he was coming. He was about to thrust this surprise onto her.

As he waited, Sy thought about the last time he’d seen Y/N.

He’d gotten too used to saying goodbye to people. But saying goodbye to her had been the hardest one in his life.

——

Y/N had felt sick since she’d woken up.

She was leaving.

How could a year go by so quickly?

Layla sat on Y/N’s bed as she packed up.

“You know, you can stay another year,” Layla frowned. She was taking this even harder than Y/N was. “You can stay forever!”

Y/N smiled at her cousin’s ridiculousness. “I really can’t. My sublet moved out two weeks ago. I’m gonna have to start paying rent again.” She sighed. “And you’re gonna have to start planning a wedding soon.”

“Exactly!” Layla argued. “I need your help!”

“No, you don’t.”

Layla sighed in disappointment.

And then she decided she wanted to talk about something else. “Have you two talked?”

“Who?”

“Don’t you play dumb. You and Sy.”

“He’s driving me to the airport, isn’t he?”

Layla glared at her cousin. “Y/N.” Her voice was stern and serious.

Y/N threw up her hands in frustration. “What is there to say, Layla?”

“I don’t know,” she sassed back. “Maybe how you feel about him? Or maybe what ya’ll are gon’ do now?”

“There’s nothing to do,” Y/N sighed in annoyance.

To her surprise, Layla didn’t respond.

It made Y/N look up at her cousin.

“It ain’t a sin to admit the truth, Y/N.” Layla sounded sad.

Maybe it was hard for people to believe, but Layla was really rooting for Y/N and Syverson. She wasn’t just trying to stir the pot and give herself entertainment. She saw the way Y/N looked at him and she had never seen Y/N act that way around a man before. And Layla had known Sy almost as long as her cousin. And he had never seemed happier. The two made sense – despite their now geographical struggles.

Y/N cleared her throat, stopping her emotions from coming through. “I can’t. OK.”

Layla give her a sympathetic look and just nodded.

“Can we stop talking about it now?” Y/N begged.

Layla nodded again.

“I really loved having you here,” she told her instead. “I feel like everything’s ‘bout to change.”

Y/N looked at her with concern. “What do you mean?”

“I’m about to get married. My life is about to change. You ain’t gonna wanna hang out with me after that.”

“What?!” Y/N laughed. “What are you talking about? You and Aiden are practically married already. What could possibly change? Of course I’ll want to hang out with you!”

“It’s strange,” Layla mumbled as she looked around at her house. “I’ll never live alone again. I won’t be a single girl. I’ll be somebody’s wife. Eventually I’ll start popping out babies. And I’ll look back at this time as if I was a different person.”

“Do you not want those things?” Y/N asked carefully.

“Of course I do. I want everything with Aiden. But sometimes I hate that I can’t have both, ya know?”

“I think I do, yeah.”

They heard the front door jiggle open.

“That’s Aiden,” Layla told her. “He’s here for damage control once you leave.”

“Dramatic,” Y/N laughed.

“Hey! At least I ain’t scared of my feelings!”

Aiden knocked on the door frame as he appeared. “You ladies saying your goodbyes?”

Layla practically wailed. “Don’t remind me!” And threw her face into a pillow.

Aiden tried not to laugh at his fiancé and switched his gaze to Y/N. “Sy takin’ you to the airport?”

Y/N just nodded.

The time to leave came far too quickly.

Layla was a puddle of tears by the time Sy got there.

When the bear of man got out of his truck, he was his usual stoic self.

Y/N didn’t know what else she had expected.

“Those ready to go?” He asked her as he pointed to the bags at her feet.

Y/N nodded.

Sy just nodded back and silently started loading them onto the back of his truck.

Obviously he was trying to give her space and privacy to say her goodbyes.

“Come back whenever you want. I mean it. Even if it’s just for a week,” Layla managed to tell her through her tears.

Y/N gave her hug, trying to soothe her cousin.

“And that offer still stands once she’s at my place,” Aiden added with a shy smile.

Y/N gave him a grateful smile and gave him a hug next.

Sy had been watching from a distance, leaning against his truck with his arms crossed.

Y/N slowly walked over to him, tears already drying on her cheeks.

“Ready to go?” He asked her gently.

She just sniffed and wiped from of her tears away.

Then Y/N felt her backpack being removed from her shoulder.

That damn man. He couldn’t even let her carry a backpack.

When Y/N got into the passenger seat, Aiden had his arms wrapped around Layla on the porch as she cried and waved at them.

Just as they pulled out of the driveway, Sy turned to Y/N and said, “Darlin’, I ain’t afraid of your tears. Don’t gotta go and hide ‘em from me.”

There was no middle console in Sy’s pickup. So Y/N slid all the way over to his side and wrapped her grip around his right arm and leaned her head on his shoulder. When she first settled there, Sy kissed the top of her head, silently telling her that he had no issue with it.

They didn’t talk, just drove in silence, awaiting the end of it all.

To Y/N surprise, Sy didn’t pull up to the departures ramp, instead going down to the parking lot. Figured the man wouldn’t just drop her off and go. He wanted every last minute he could with her, even if it cost him overpriced airport parking.

Sy only let Y/N carry her backup and carried the rest of her stuff to baggage claim.

As soon as all her luggage was checked, Y/N felt the weight of their inevitable goodbye.

Sy walked her to the security line, but she didn’t join it yet.

All of the sudden, Y/N was crying.

He instantly responded by pulling her into his arms. He didn’t tell her to stop crying or that everything would be OK. He just held her and rubbed her back, allowing her the safety of his arms as her emotions escaped.

Eventually Y/N had to pull away, even though her heart was screaming at her not to.

The two of them looked into each other’s eyes.

‘I love you': It was hovering over them, taunting them and pressuring someone to finally say the words aloud.

But they both couldn’t do it.

“Thank you for driving me,” Y/N said instead.

He sighed, “Don’t gotta thank me.” Then he pushed some hair off her face and wiped a few of her tears away.

“Can you do me a favor?” Sy asked seriously.

She nodded.

“Call me once you get back to your apartment,” he requested. “Just wanna make sure you get back safely and there ain’t any issues with your place.”

Her heart quivered with the request, but she nodded again as she tried not to burst into tears once again.

“Go on, now.” Sy nodded towards the security line. “You got a plane to catch.”

Y/N looked at the line and then back at him, almost as if she were scared.

And before she could change her mind, Y/N leaned up and kissed Syverson.

It was their last kiss – and it felt like it.

“I hate this,” Y/N whispered into his lips after they pulled away.

“I know, darlin’.”

Then, to her horror, he gave her a quick kiss to her head and started walking backwards, separating himself from her.

“Go on,” he nodded to security.

‘Go after him. Stay,’ a voice was screaming at her.

But Y/N couldn’t do it.

So, she took a deep breath and headed towards security.

—

The skyline was the only comfort waiting for Y/N back in New York.

It felt like no time had passed, the city was the same.

It took Y/N a moment to realize that she was the one who had changed.

Y/N waited for that typical wave of comfort and relief when you walk back into your home after a long trip.

But it never came.

It didn’t smell like her anymore. Her subletter’s perfume or candles or overall pheromones had erased Y/N from the apartment.

She sighed, nearly falling onto the edge of her bed and looked around.

“Home sweet home,” Y/N mumbled to herself.

Then she remembered her promise to Syverson.

She grabbed her phone and pressed his contact.

“Hey, darlin’.” He greeted on the second ring.

The pet name almost felt wrong now. Like it had expired – or like she wasn’t deserving of it now that she’d left.

“Hi,” she said slowly.

Y/N hadn’t expected that just hearing his voice would make her feel so terrible. Fuck. She already missed him and it hadn’t even been 12 hours.

“Feel good to be home?”

Y/N hesitated before simply humming, “Mhmm.”

She knew if he tried to actually speak, she would burst into tears.

And what good would that do?

“You alright?” He asked her.

God, she was so selfish. All he did was worry about her. It’s not like this was any easier for him. But all he worried about was her.

“I don’t know how to do this, Sy.”

She heard him let out a heavy sigh.

“Y/N, I don’t have to disappear from your life.”

“It’s just…fuck…I miss you already.”

“You once told me you can get any food you want at any time of day

“Yeah,” she sniffed.

“So hows about you order something you’ve been craving for the last year? I think we both know that would make you feel better.”

The food didn't make her feel any better. Neither did the bottle of wine she drank by herself.

———

15 minutes after Sy sat down on Y/N’s stoop, he saw her.

She had chunky headphones on and had two canvas bags hanging off each shoulder, nearly overflowing with groceries. He could tell they were heavy and digging into her shoulders.

Y/N was zoned out, only walking quickly to reach her apartment faster and to be done with such an annoying errand.

It wasn’t until she’d crossed the street in a jaywalk that she noticed Syverson.

Y/N stopped dead in her tracks, clearly in shock.

Was she imagining this? Had she completely lost it?

All Sy said was, “Hey, darlin’,” and she was snapped out of her trance.

Y/N dropped her groceries to the ground and ran to him.

Sy chuckled as he lifted her into his arms and spun her around.

“What are you doing here?�� She finally managed to ask, almost in a whimper.

“I just…” Syverson suddenly realized he hadn’t come prepared with an answer for this question. “I missed you,” he admitted.

Her face softened, and she hugged him again.

“I missed you, too.”

She mumbled it in his chest and it was as if she was releasing a tension in her body that she’d had since leaving Texas.

“Listen, I know this was all a surprise. You weren’t expecting me. And you got a life,” he began explaining. “I have a military buddy who lives in Queens. Said I could stay with him no problem.”

Y/N laughed at him. “Sy, shut up. You can stay at my place. Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Did you just tell me to shut up?” He tilted his head to the side.

“I did,” she giggled. “Welcome to New York, Ethan Syverson.”

Then she started walking towards her discarded groceries.

“I got ‘em,” Sy came out of nowhere and picked up the two reusable bags, as well as his duffle bag.

She gave him a playful glare.

“Ain’t gotta give me that look,” Sy sighed. Then he nudged his head towards the doorway. “You gon’ let us up or what?”

Y/N shook her head at his southern manners and walked past him, up the stoop.

Just as she opened the door to the building, she hesitated and turned to him nervously.

“It’s…ummm…not much. My place, I mean. It’s really small.”

“Y/N, it don’t matter to me,” he told her gently.

Was she expecting him to make a rude comment about it? Did other people from out of town do that?

Sy would never. Not that he even cared, but it was rude above all else.

Three floors up and Y/N opened the apartment door, walking in first and quickly turning on lights.

It was a studio apartment. And she was right: it was very small. But most New Yorkers would consider her lucky.

“Home sweet home,” Y/N sighed with a nervous laugh.

Sy could tell that she liked her place – and it was so…her.

He was so used to seeing her in Layla’s home, that he didn’t realize he’d never been lucky enough to see the intimate and personal side of Y/N’s life: her home, her oasis, her escape from the world.

“Cozy,” he answered. “I like it.”

Y/N stared at him for a second as he carefully laid her groceries on the kitchen counter.

Sy noticed her watching him. “…What?”

“Nothing,” she laughed softly. “You just…You look so much bigger in my apartment. Or my apartment looks so much smaller with you in it. Can’t decide which one it is.”

“Pretty sure it’s me,” Sy joked as he smirked at her.

“You must be starving. What do you want to eat?” Y/N asked, clearly wanting to keep their conversations light. Her eyes lit up. “We’ve got every type of cuisine in the world at our fingertips. Anything that you’ve always wanted to try?”

“You pick.”

“Nooo!” She whined. “Come on! You have to be craving something.”

“Ummm,” he rubbed his beard. “A burger sounds nice.”

Y/N’s disappointment was evident.

New York had Ethiopian, Indian, French, Romanian – literally anything anyone could ever want.

“Burger it is,” she sighed, trying not hide her disappointment now.

But she quickly changed the subject.

“Listen, I have a friend's birthday thing tonight. It’s super casual and just at a dive bar. Would you come with me? We can grab dinner before and head there after.”

“I ain’t trying to impose,” he scratched the back of his neck and shifted his weight. “Guess I didn’t think this whole thing through, huh?”

“Hey,” she stepped close to him. “You’re not imposing. It was a good surprise. The best, actually.”

“Sure I won’t be intruding if I come?”

“I promise. My friends know about you,” Y/N didn’t meet his gaze as she admitted that. “They’ll probably interrogate you once they realize who you are.”

“Think I can handle a bit of interrogation,” he chuckled.

Sy tried not to dwell on the fact that all her friends knew about him.

What had she told them? Would he agree with all the facts she gave them? Or would he be upset with Y/N’s retelling of their story?

“I’m gonna shower real quick. Feel free to make yourself at home. TV has pretty much every streaming service.”

He just nodded.

Since the studio had no walls besides the bathroom, it left little room for privacy.

Sy noticed that Y/N had tried to subtly grab clothes to change into and bring them to the bathroom with her.

He had seen her naked more times than he could count. But it was like they had moved backwards. There was an awkward uncertainty between them now.

Had all that trust and vulnerability, that Syverson had slowly earned, vanished already?

When Y/N emerged from the bathroom, she was fully dressed.

And Sy couldn’t help but notice that her clothes were not the ones he had grown used to over the past year.

He quickly realized that he was seeing the New York version of Y/N. And she looked much different than the girl he met, who desperately tried to fit into the new and strange environment of Texas.

Sy tried not to stare as she did her hair and makeup. But that was a bit of a challenge.

Y/N seemed tense and nervous.

‘Was this a mistake?’ Sy wondered. ‘Was he making her uncomfortable and she was just too polite to tell him?’

“Ready?” Y/N finally asked as she shoved some things into a small purse.

He stood up from the couch.

“You look very pretty,” he commented lightly.

Y/N blinked at the compliment and looked down at her outfit. “Really?”

“Why do you sound so surprised?” He asked with a bit of a smirk.

“I-I don’t know. Just caught me off guard, I guess…”

“Come on, darlin’. Let’s get something to eat.”

As they walked to the subway, Y/N gave her survival tips to Syverson. “Treat the sidewalk like you would a highway. Don’t slow down for no reason. Don’t stop out of nowhere. Stay on the right. And walk fast.”

Sy grinned as he watched Y/N walk with such purpose, swerving past the crowded Manhattan sidewalks.

Y/N smiled back at Sy when she caught him watching her.

“Come on, handsome.” She teased before grabbing onto his hand, weaving their fingers.

He expected her to let go once they were through a crowded area, but she didn’t. And her grip was firm, making it clear that she wanted to hold his hand.

“There’s no such thing as personal space with public transport. Just gotta shove your way in,” Y/N tried to warn him as the subway doors opened.

And Sy hated it instantly.

But he didn’t mind that Y/N leaned close to him as she held the bar above her, their torsos practically attached. He could smell her perfume, and it was a relief to know that at least that felt familiar.

They were only two stops away when a man shoved his way past them to get out. He knocked Y/N’s shoulder so hard that she actually stumbled a bit, causing Sy to quickly grip her waist to steady her.

Y/N didn’t even seem to notice or care.

But she looked up to see Sy’s jaw clenching and him glaring at the back of the man’s retreating figure. And she realized what had upset him.

Y/N placed a hand on his chest soothingly and looked into his eyes, silently telling him that it was OK and he could relax. She added a quiet laugh as if to make light of the incident.

Once they got to the restaurant, Syverson seemed to finally relax a bit. He felt more in his element. The restaurant drowned out the overwhelming sounds of the city.

Sy noticed how no one paid them any mind as they walked in. There wasn’t the nosey gawking that happened everywhere in Texas, because you were bound to run into someone you knew.

But not here. No one knew who he was and no on seemed to care.

It was oddly refreshing.

And it finally seemed like Y/N and him had returned to their old selves.

Y/N asked a million questions about his friends in Texas, the farm, the construction zone Layla had turned his house into.

And in return, Sy asked her about work, being back in New York, and all her friends there that he had managed to remember from her telling stories in the past.

There was a lull in conversation – but not awkward.

Y/N leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. She seemed to be studying him from across the table.

“Got somethin’ to share, darlin’?” He teased.

She shook her head. “I can’t believe you’re here. In New York.”

He just cleared his throat and took a sip of his whiskey, not really sure what he was supposed to say to that.

She let him stay quiet.

“Ready to head out?” She asked.

“Plannin’ on dinin' and dashin’?” He looked around for their waiter so they could get the check.

“Oh, I already paid,” Y/N smiled mischievously as she stood up. “I snuck my card to the waiter when I went to the bathroom.”

Syverson gave her a glare.

Y/N leaned up to whisper in his ear, “You’re in New York now, baby.”

And she kissed him on the cheek.

As she started practically skipping away in victory, Sy managed to subtly reach just beneath her skirt and pinch her ass.

Y/N couldn’t stop the yelp that escaped.

But still no one in the restaurant looked at them.

It wasn’t until they were back outside that Y/N smacked his chest and cried out, “You ass!”

But it was all through a smile.

Sy just chuckled and put his arm around her shoulder.

Maybe he didn’t mind the invisibility that New York offered.

When they got to the bar, Y/N was holding Sy’s hand once again.

Instead of making him feel out of place and awkward, she instantly introduced Syverson and everyone seemed to be so excited that he was visiting.

But in her efforts to wish her friend a happy birthday and say hello to her other friends, Y/N had accidentally left Sy on his own.

He should be able to handle it. Really, he should.

Y/N didn’t have issues with it when she was in Texas.

But Sy realized, he had nothing to talk about with these people. The only connection was their love for Y/N – and that could only take a conversation so far.

And the setting didn’t exactly make it any easier for Sy.

The music was loud. Everyone was dressed to make a statement. The drinks were expensive. The bar was tiny and overcrowded.

Sy’s accent got commented on at least a dozen times. And while it’s not exactly rude, he quickly became sick of it. There was a subtle teasing underneath it all.

There are a few other guys there and they don’t seem to have any interest in talking to him either. Y/N must’ve mentioned in passing that he used to be in the military, because they seemed to be intimidated by him.

Or maybe they were waiting for Sy to pick a fight and show his true colors?

It didn't help that the men in New York were just…smaller. And because of that, Syverson stood out even more. Not only because of his height, but how broad he was, too.

Despite just wearing a white t-shirt, jeans, and boots, there was just something about Syverson that screamed he wasn’t a city boy.

The situation was even worse when Sy had quickly observed that one of Y/N’s male “friends” clearly had a thing for her. Sy caught him checking Y/N out every time she was focused in a conversation. His entire body tensed when he saw the guy put his hand on her lower back at one point. But Sy relaxed when Y/N stepped away from it – whether it was intentional or not, Sy didn’t know.

His distance and silence doesn’t go past Y/N after awhile.

She tried to check in on him every once in awhile. But when she asked how he was doing, he would just brush it off and say he was fine.

Eventually, it became clear to Y/N that Sy wasn’t having any fun. Luckily, her friends didn’t seem to notice. All they told her was how polite and quiet he was.

“I’m gonna get a car. Ready to go?” She asked evenly.

“No subway?” He asked, not that he really cared.

“No. They don’t run as frequently after midnight – and the express trains stop, too. It would take twice as long. And it looks like cars are cheap right now.”

Sy just nodded. “I can pay for it.”

“You don’t even have any of the apps,” she argued.

He just sighed, not wanting to turn this into an argument.

They said their goodbyes and got into the car Y/N had requested.

Sy had used car services before – usually while traveling – but they always felt weird to him. He would rather drive himself around.

“That boy’s in love with you,” Sy muttered a few minutes into the drive.

Y/N didn’t miss that he referred to him as a ‘boy,’ and not a ‘man.’

“Who? Colin?”

“Fuck if I know his name…”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “He’s not in love with me. Maybe he has a crush on me. But it’s not like it matters. I have zero interest.”

Sy didn’t respond.

“Is that why you’re being a grump?” She challenged.

He looked at her and then at their driver, silently telling her he didn’t want to talk when they had an audience.

The rest of the 20 minute ride was dead quiet. And that silence continued as the two walked up the stairs to Y/N’s apartment.

“You know what I don’t understand?” Y/N began, as she took off her heels, letting them hit the floor loudly. “Why is it that I can have a conversation with any of your friends? But you can’t do the same in return?”

Sy rubbed his face. But he didn’t even know what to say.

How pathetic was it to say that he felt out of place? That he was overwhelmed and unsure of himself?

“I thought maybe you would want to see my life. But clearly not,” she mumbled.

“I did,” he sighed. “I mean, I do.”

She threw up her hands. “So what’s the problem, Sy?”

“I don’t…I don’t fit in here.”

Y/N stopped moving around the world to look at him. “Why did you come here?”

Sy crossed his arms and looked at the ground. “I needed you.”

“That’s not all. And you know it.”

“Y/N, I love you." He finally lifted his head. "I shoulda told you before you left. I should’ve told you every day since I figured it out.”

“Fucking hell,” Y/N hissed. “Don’t tell me that.”

“Why not?”

And with that, Y/N finally exploded and yelled, “Because we can’t be together!”

“Says who?” He challenged, taking a step towards her.

“Ethan, what world are you living in!?” Y/N cried out desperately. “Don’t you get it? There is no winning for us!” Her fingers ran through her hair. “You hate it here. You can pretend not to all you want, but I can see it. I can’t ask you to move here.”

“You never asked,” Sy interrupted.

She paused. “W-What?”

He crossed his arms. “You never asked me to move here.”

Y/N studied his face for a moment before quietly telling him, “Because I didn’t want to hear you say no.”

Sy frowned, almost as if he was offended. “Why are you so convinced I’d say no?”

“Are you kidding?” She gasped. “You’ve been here for less than 24 hours and it’s so obvious that you fucking hate it.”

Sy wanted to fight her on it, but she didn’t deserve to be lied to.

Y/N was right: the city life wasn’t for him. No amount of time or effort would change that. Ethan Syverson was a country boy through and through.

“Long distance,” he finally stated as he put his hands on his hips.

“You don’t know what you’re asking,” she argued.

“I don’t? It’s not exactly unfamiliar territory, darlin’.”

Y/N scoffed. “You’re not in the military anymore, Ethan. And I’m no military wife.”

“So that’s it then?” He sounded angry now. “You won’t even try.”

“I don’t…” Y/N had to stop as her bottom lip trembled and she started to tear up. “I don’t want to spend more time missing you than loving you, Ethan.”

The tears couldn’t be stopped anymore.

And Sy could never stand the sight of her crying.

Without asking for permission, he pulled her into his arms.

And Y/N cried into his chest.

“You never asked me to stay,” she whispered, still holding onto him.

“What?” He looked down at her.

“You never asked me to stay with you. Just like I didn’t ask you to move here.”

“I couldn’t do it,” he sighed and pulled away, but still held her face. “You ain’t wrong, I did want to see your life here. But now I know that I can’t offer you the same things your life here can.”

Y/N didn’t tell him differently.

“If I asked you to move to Texas," he continued, "and you did…sooner or later, you’d miss your life here. And eventually… you’d resent me.”

Y/N couldn’t deny or confirm his theory. It was all built on hypothetical futures. But there was something inside her saying that he was right.

Yeah, Y/N enjoyed her time in Texas. But it was a fixed amount of time. She wasn’t meant to stay there forever.

There were things about it that she would always have problems with: the conservative bigotry, the religiousness, the government’s blatant attack against women, the racism, the sexism. People could say “ma’am” and “miss” all they wanted, but that didn’t make up for all the issues with the state’s regressive beliefs.

“You’re going to find a woman who can give you the life you want,” Y/N finally whispered. “I’m sorry I ever got in the way of that in the first place.”

“You ain’t in the way of nothing,” he corrected her. His thumb lifted her chin. “Who’s sayin’ you can’t give me the life I want, huh?”

“Sy…” she breathed in frustration.

“Do you love me?”

“Stop.”

“No. I ain’t lettin’ you hide from it any longer. Do you love me or not, Y/N?”

“Yes! OK?!” She gasped. “I love you.”

Sy couldn’t keep his hands to himself any longer. He grabbed her face and pulled it to him. It was rougher than usual, and he couldn’t help it.

They were both desperate. It was no clear what 30+ days apart had done to them.

The entire day had been them trying to figure out how to move through the world together again. And it had been awkward and confusing.

But now? Now they had no issue being connected.

Syverson finally pulled away from her lips so they could breathe.

Their faces were still so close.

“Us loving each other isn’t enough,” Y/N gasped as they both tried to catch their breath.

“It’s enough for tonight, darlin’.”

————

Y/N couldn’t remember the last time she had a man sleep over at her apartment.

She also couldn’t remember if there was ever a time when Syverson was still in bed when she woke up.

That man required half the amount of sleep a normal human being did.

When she slept at his place – which had been quite often – he was always already up doing work on the farm.

So Y/N was shocked that Sy was still asleep beneath her, as she woke up against his bare chest.

That didn’t last long. Because as soon as she started stirring, he was up.

“You feeling OK?” She teased.

“What?” He mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

“Huh. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wake up before.”

He pinched her sides to pay her back for the teasing.

“Kept waking up,” Sy mumbled. “Felt like a damn siren went by every 30 minutes.”

When he was in the military, Syverson had slept in conditions that were far from ideal. Sometimes they used rocks for beds. Sometimes they were in a freezing desert.

But he was also conditioned to wake up at the smallest sounds. So the city soundscape was not something his ears or body could ignore.

Y/N laughed, “You get used to it.”

She watched him for a moment.

“What?” Sy asked. “I makin’ your bed look small now?”

She laughed. “Something like that, yeah.”

Holding up the sheet to cover her naked body, Y/N leaned down to kiss him.

Last night was a bad idea. Both of them understood that to a degree.

Because their situation hadn’t changed, but they had still acted on their feelings.

“Wanna be a tourist today?” Y/N asked with a teasing smile.

Syverson wanted to tell her no, that he wanted to just spend all day in bed with her.

But he saw the sparkle in her eyes. She wanted to show him New York. Maybe she was hoping that she could change the way he felt about the city life.

So, instead, Syverson rubbed up and down the side of her ribcage and answered, “You take me wherever you want, darlin.”

“I gotta shower real quick,” she told him with a peck to his lips.

“Guess I have no choice but to join you,” Sy laughed.

But Y/N cringed. “Sy, my shower is a so tiny. There’s no way we can both fit.”

Sy laughed and shook his head. New York problems.

“Alright then,” Syverson sighed as he put an arm behind his head. “I’ll just watch you walk around naked from bed then.”

Y/N rolled her eyes at him and hurried to the bathroom.

--

Syverson couldn’t remember the last time he walked around so much. Yeah, he worked on his farm. But it wasn’t spread out like the boroughs of New York City – not to mention, he rode a horse a lot of the time, too.

Y/N dragged him to her favorite cafe, to an art museum, to the best neighborhood for vintage shopping, to the river front, and finally to a brewery.

It took Syverson a moment to realize that she was trying to distract the both of them from their next goodbye.

He had seen Y/N’s face drop a bit when he told her he had bought a return flight for early Monday morning. But he had no idea what he was walking into, so he figured the shorter the trip, the better.

“Who’s taking care of the farm while you’re gone?” Y/N asked at the brewery.

“I paid the farm hands overtime to look after the place for the weekend.”

Y/N nodded.

But it was clear her mind was racing.

Sy leaned forward on the table to get closer to her. “You worried about my farm, darlin?”

“It’s your home and it’s how you make your living,” Y/N mumbled, playing with the handle of her beer mug to avoid looking at him.

Sy leaned back as he realized what Y/N was thinking: In a magical and perfect world where he lived in New York, what the hell would he even do for work here?

“You can’t exactly stay away for long periods of time,” she finally thought aloud.

“No, sure can’t,” he admitted in a gruff voice.

Then Sy cleared his throat, wanting to change the subject so this conversation didn’t lead to a fight – or worse, with Y/N crying.

“So what do you want to do tonight?” He asked.

“Would you want to just – I don’t know – order takeout and relax at my apartment?”

He gave her a grin. “That sounds like a mighty fine idea.”

Their night was quiet and cozy.

The two of them both seemed utterly disinterested in talking.

What more was there to say?

They hadn’t found a solution to their problem. And Y/N had made it clear that she couldn’t do the long-distance, scared that it would end up breaking both their hearts.

And it was hard for Syverson to defend it. Especially when he remembered all his military buddies that had them: almost half of them ended in breakup or infidelity – or both.

So they just held each other, savoring every last minute they had together.

The night ended with them in bed together, both of them knowing being with each other like this would only make the morning harder. But them silently agreeing that they didn’t care.

–––––––

So that's the last vignette I had planned. Let me know if ya'll want more – and be specific. 😏