#I don't think they canonically lay eggs

[furby-junkie]

A German Furby Babies article from Hasbro’s German website.

Source

[gith-egg]

I do find it a little bit silly that the githyanki are these people who have been heavily genetically/physiologically altered to the point that they:

barely still have a functioning digestive system

appear to have literally no subcutaneous body fat

reproduce asexually via laying eggs

and the character designers went "yeah they can have round boobies tho"

[thebenjiblackwoodexpress]

Jump then fall part.3

Description: In which Aeron is Y/N's knight in shining armour and Benjicot has a soft spot for Bracken ladies crossing the border (this may be an Easter egg for future crossovers with The Blackwood Knight series 😏)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

Playlist:

Fearless~ Taylor Swift @ithilwen-blackwood you are so right about Aeron being Fearless coded.

Somebody to You~ The Vamps

Hold my Girl~ George Ezra

Warnings: Canon typical misogyny, mentions of a panic attack, angst, swearing, I don't understand basic geography so I'm just making things up topographically

Y/N had hoped that taking a walk along the bank of the Red Fork would help clear her mind from the swirling thoughts that had consumed her mind of late since her return to the Riverlands. To her dismay, the gentle babbling of the river and the quiet beauty of the landscape she called home did little to distract her from thoughts of Aeron Bracken. Detained by his duties that morning, they had arranged to meet later that day. Her truest friend since she was but a girl, even the separation of many years had failed to sever their bond. Quite the opposite, and that is where the problem lay. Y/N had thought about Aeron Bracken often during her time in Kings Landing, constantly wondering whether he missed her as much as she missed him. When her father had informed her of their imminent return to the Riverlands, Y/N was delighted at the prospect of being reunited with her old friend. Whilst she had adapted to life in Kings Landing and forged new friendships, none had been as strong as the one she had made with the young Bracken boy.

She had convinced herself that everything could be just as it had been when they were children, determined to befriend him anew. But she had not counted on the butterflies that had arisen in her abdomen upon seeing him for the first time as a young man, a knight. He struck a dashing figure in the garb of his order and the colours of his house. She recalled thinking him pretty, almost like a woodland sprite as a child with his long locks of hair and sharp features. In that moment, she thought him the most handsome man she had ever seen. She found herself wanting to trace the outline of his cheekbones with her fingertips, to run her hands through his hair, which she rejoiced to see he still kept long, and she wanted to gaze into his warm brown eyes forever as they bore down into her own.

She did not know what she had been expecting, but Aeron Bracken was no longer the gangly boy she'd trusted enough upon first meeting to break her fall from the Brackentree. By the end of the evening Y/N feared that she might be falling in love this time, against all reason. He was the heir of Stone Hendge and would one day be Lord Bracken. Worse, he had been her closest friend and she had hoped he would be again. Y/N had no desire to jeopardise their friendship now they had been reunited.

While Aeron had by no means acted coldly towards her when his uncle had reintroduced them, she could not but notice how reserved and shy he seemed around her that first evening, holding her at somewhat of a distance. Several moons had passed since then and their rekindled friendship seemed stronger than ever, and there were many times when Y/N was certain Aeron shared her sentiments. He had never expressed it through words, but she had thought she had understood it in his actions.

By the way he would always read to her, knowing that she found the sound of his voice comforting, shoulders or arms always somehow brushing as they sat by side. By the way he would often bring her the flowers she adored so much, when she knew the Eastern part of the Bracken Woods where they could be found were nowhere near the training yard from whence he had come. By his gentleness towards her, always holding a hand out to help her over an obstacle and walking her home each day. And by the way he would gaze at her so attentively, looking at her as if she were the most interesting thing in his world no matter what their course of their current conversation was.

Yet Y/N was nervous to broach the subject, aiming to encourage Aeron through her own affectionate gestures and always hoping that her feelings for him were reciprocated. Mulling over her options, Y/N realised she had reached the outermost boundaries of Bracken lands, nearly stumbling over a pile up of boundary stones. Immediately turning to return back the way she had come, a jolt of raw panic pierced her heart as she spotted four Blackwood Knights storming angrily towards her. The one closest to her had a face like a storm cloud, his booming voice breaking the tranquility of the landscape.

"Bracken wench. Did you think you could just waltz right into Blackwood lands?" He sneered at her, voice dripping with venom. She opened her mouth to explain that his anger was misdirected, she had not crossed the boundary and was not strictly speaking a Bracken, but as he continued to glare furiously down at her she realised that she had chosen today of all days to wear a dress of mellow ochre, closely resembling the colours of House Bracken. She was immediately certain that nothing she said would carry much weight and started to take small but hurried steps backwards away from him, suddenly hoping Aeron would turn up and immediately cursing herself for the thought. It was not his responsibility to rescue her from every scrape she found herself in, she was no longer a child, and she would rather face a hundred shouting Blackwoods than see her knight endanger himself for her.

To her dismay the Blackwood Knight continued to advance towards her, suddenly taking hold of both her elbows in a bruising grip and aggressively shaking her.  "You think you can do whatever you want, don't you? You smug Brackens. But these are Blackwood lands and there are consequences for crossing them."  Panicking in earnest now, and finding herself unable to speak, Y/N feared the Blackwood would strike her or kill her where she stood, his anger so palpable and his iron grip searing through the fabric of her dress.

Her mind frantically fought for a way out of this situation, but before Y/N could act upon any of her admittedly half-baked escape plans she felt the Blackwood release her arms as he was abruptly shoved away from her onto the ground. A gentle but firm hand encircled her wrist, and she was swiftly pulled backwards as her rescuer took up a protective stance in front of her. Her relief at the realisation that the shoulders now concealing her from view were Aeron's was short lived, quashed by an intense wave of fear and nausea at the danger she had unwittingly placed him in.

Samwell was starting to get on Aeron's nerves. He'd been badgering him all day to tell Y/N how he felt, Tully girl be damned. He'd then been insistent on meeting Y/N with him after they'd finished in the training yard, much to Aeron's chagrin. The two had become dangerously conspiratorial, often banding together to tease him, and Aeron was unhappy to have to share Y/N's attention. His mood soured further when Jon and Edmund (who he always thought resembled a peacock) had similarly decided to tag along. He found himself marching along the Red Ford to meet Y/N with his friends in tow.

Distant shouting caught his attention as they passed close to the border. What he saw directly ahead of him had him seeing red and breaking into a run before his friends could fully comprehend what had set him off. Before he'd fully come to a stop he used his momentum to forcibly shove the Blackwood brute he'd seen manhandle Y/N away from her. Pulling Y/N behind him he tried to push her gently backwards towards Samwell who'd been hot on his heels.

"You dare attack a lady?" Aeron seethed, hand clasping the hilt of his sword. The Blackwood Knight had stumbled back up to his feet, three more Blackwoods hovering just behind him. "The stupid girl trespassed on our lands!"

Aeron stepped forward threateningly, glaring at the craven bastard who dared to insult Y/N. "They're Bracken lands, and if you speak another word about my lady you'll regret it." Suddenly Aeron felt a smaller hand grab his, tugging him backwards. "Please Aeron, it does not matter."

Y/N's voice was barely above a whisper and tears streamed down her face. It was all Aeron could do not to fell the Blackwood responsible where he stood for causing her state of distress. He wanted to hold her and comfort her, but he did not trust to turn his back on the Blackwood Knights when she was still in danger.

Samwell stepped between Aeron and the Blackwood. "The lady meant no harm, let's set the matter to rest." His tone was placating but firm and, for the most part, the Blackwoods seemed to have tired of the whole affair, turning to walk away. Aeron turned to look at Y/N, lightly cupping her cheek and bending down to look into her eyes. "Are you well my love?" She looked quizzically up at him, slowly nodding but still visibly shaken, trembling slightly. Aeron took deep breathes, trying to root himself to the ground and will himself not to do something reckless.

He might have successfully calmed himself enough to walk away as Y/N had asked, had he not heard the Blackwood bastard mutter under his breath "Bracken whore." Aeron removed himself from Y/N in the next second, his sword drawn and pointing directly at the Blackwood's heart, the sound of metal echoing throughout the clearing as more swords were drawn. Samwell quickly grabbed Y/N's arm to lightly drag her further backwards. The Blackwood Knight looked almost surprised at the unbridled rage on Aeron's face.

"What's all this then?" The smug face of Benjicot Blackwood as he strolled calmly towards the scene, as infuriatingly confident as ever. "Brackens can't fucking keep within the boundary lines" one of the Blackwood Knights snarled. "Your Knights attacked a lady, Blackwood" Aeron snapped back. "She should not have come so close to the border then!"

The young lord of Raventree seemed to assess the truth of the situation in mere moments, his eyes darkening. "I am sorry for the lady's distress, I will not permit any of my Knights to attack a woman on my lands" the last part addressed to his fellow Blackwoods. Benjicot turned slowly back towards Aeron, his expression far more serious than Aeron had ever seen it in any of their past interactions. "I trust you will honour the boundary stones in future Bracken."

Aeron said nothing, just glowering back at the Blackwood boy as he watced him turn away, signalling with a wave of his arm for the Blackwood Knights to follow. Aeron watched them walk away for a few moments before turning back around, looking for Y/N only to lock onto her a few yards away hyperventilating, a panicking Samwell frantically trying to calm her down. Aeron sprinted over, pushing Samwell aside. "It's ok Sam, I've got her."

Lowering himself to her level he cupped her face, trying to get her to meet his eyes all the while trying to reassure her in hushed tones only she could hear. "Hey, hey it's all OK. You're safe, no one will harm you, I swear to you."

Still struggling for breath, Y/N gasped out "I thought he'd kill you. And it would be all my fault." Aeron felt his heart stop for a moment at Y/N's heartfelt concern for him but any satisfaction he would have felt from such a confession was diminished by Y/N's sharp intakes of breaths and tear-stained face, which pulled at his heart strings. His primary concern was to calm her down, starting with assuring her that he was ok. "None of what transpired is your fault." Grabbing her hand, he pressed it firmly to his chest. "Can you feel my heartbeat beneath your palm?" Y/N looked up at him, nodding slowly. "I am unharmed." He spoke slowly, looking into her eyes, trying to keep her focus on him. Y/N's breathing slowly began to even out as she continued to feel the steady beat of Aeron's heart and the comforting heat of his hand atop hers, holding it in place over his chest.

Aeron did not know how much time they passed in this manner. After a time Y/N slumped onto him, her head coming to rest in the crook of his neck in exhaustion as he supported most of her weight. Tentatively adjusting his hold on her, Aeron moved his hands up and down her back in what he hoped was a comforting motion.

"I could not bear it if they'd hurt you because you were defending me." Y/N's voice was muffled by the fabric of his tunic but he heard her easily.

Tilting his head down close to her ear, Aeron replied in a soft tone "I will always defend you."

Y/N loosened the tight grip she had on his tunic to look up at him with eyes still blurry from tears. "Why?"

"Because I love you." Aeron had envisioned many scenarios for how he would confess his love to Y/N. But in the end the words fell from his lips almost without his permission. He had been so concerned for Y/N's safety, so angered to see her harmed and in tears, so grateful for her concern for him in spite of her own safety, and so relieved to see her well that the words came naturally. "What?" Y/N's eyes had widened  almost comically.

Aeron mustered all of the courage he possessed, taking a deep breath. "I said that I love you. I will always defend the woman I love." He shut his eyes briefly, lowering his head and waiting for her response.

"I Love you too, you silly boy."

His eyes snapped back up to meet her waiting smile.

"I think I have loved you ever since you coaxed me into jumping out of that tree."

He moved his hands to her waist, holding her in place and slowly moving his face closer to hers, noses lightly brushing against one another. "That is not exactly how I remember it, but I have loved you just as long."

Y/N laughed at that, bringing a hand back up to his tunic to pull him closer.

" May I kiss you?" Their close proximity had made Aeron braver than he'd normally be and the words left his mouth before he could rethink them.  Y/N responded by gently pressing her lips to his own, pulling away shortly afterwards. Aeron found himself chasing her lips and pulling her back towards him by her waist as she brought her hands up to his shoulders to grant her more leverage as their lips moulded together once more. Their first kiss was not the sweeping embrace of legends, it was clumsy and inexperienced, noses bumping against each other and teeth knocking together. Aeron found he did not care, pouring all of the love he felt for Y/N into each brush of his lips against hers.

Feral pretty Bracken defending his lady.

@lovebabe18 @poppyflower-22 @ithilwen-blackwood @spinachtz @lady-callisto @twistytimesandthoughts @abookloverlawyerfan-blog @mymoonempress

[ahamkara-apologist]

finally got the chance to draw so I kinda went ham with drawing up a headcanon sheet for the Eliksni, in which I blatantly disregarded the canon skintones and just had fun (i don't really enjoy how pink they are in canon personally- I think they should have more natural colour variation)

Some notes:

-The freckles on Eramis and Variks are just freckles, they're not due to age. As for the alarming amount of minor scratches scarred into Eramis's neck and, to an extent, Misraaks- those are marks from hatchling claws! They're traditionally considered marks of beauty and wisdom in Eliksni society. Eramis has many to mirror her many litters, while Misraaks only has a couple from Eido

-I drew everyone but Taniks bald because I drew Taniks first and then realized later that it kinda obscured my hcs for their individual head shapes, so their setae is on the bottom. Setae is someting that only fully sexually mature adults develop, and is much closer in texture to a horse's mane than human hair. It also runs all the way down the back of their neck, much like a mane, and in some cases (like Taniks) has barbs or hooks along its strands so that ornaments can be woven into it, which is inspiration that I took from decorator crabs

-Eramis's facial scars were given to her by a Guardian at Twilight Gap, and are deep enough that they cut into her nasal cavity. Luckily, it's right near the nostrils anyways so she isn't impacted too bad, but she does have to be careful about keeping it clear of debris. Deep in her eye sockets, she's also had some electrodes installed that link to sensors in her helmet and give her little buzzes/shocks whenever something passes in front of it to help compensate for being half-blind, but it's a pretty crude device that doesn't work all that well on small objects

-Each Eliksni's ethnicity is written below their names, which is why Eido has a question mark. She's a mixed kid- try to guess which Houses her parents might have been from ::3

-The horns/shoulder spines were extra spikes of mineralized chitin that were common on adults in Riis, and were traits that were lost during the Drift. They often were calcium/mineral stores used to show age and fitness, but since resources in Sol are scarce, they no longer grow during molts. Riisborn Eliksni still have horn nubs, but that's about it

-As for the sexual dimorphism thing: that's more just me musing about how slight it would be with my hcs about their reproduction (which involves females laying fertilized eggs into a specialized broodpouch in the male, who then builds on their yolk supply and gives them the calcium needed to form eggshells, and thus needs to be bigger). When given actual Eliksni with a natural range of bodily variation, it would be near-impossible to distinguish them

[bonefall]

what are the main prey animals that Shadowclan eat in better bones? because in my rewrite, i can only find like 5 british marshland birds, the frogs like canon, and a common lizard, while the other clans have dozens of prey species. I don't think 7 prey species can feed 50 cats for the generations i need them to, yknow?

This is hard to find out because of the unfortunate reality that wetlands are an "unpopular" natural biome. It's hell out there. No one appreciates their local swamps and marshes </3

But I'M here, NUMBER 1 GOO FAN. Quickie on some of the most common species ShadowClan will be hunting, in an English wetland. 5 for your convenience.

Small intro/recap to BB!ShadowClan's food culture; For a mixture of several reasons, including early collaboration and trade with WindClan, living in an area heavily affected by seasonal changes, and cultural pride in being able to eat anything, ShadowClan has one of the most varied diets of any Clan. Mammals, fish, birds, if they can get their mouth on it, they will eat it.

(Yes. This means predators as well. Other Clans will avoid eating predators for culture and taste reasons. ShadowClan finds it offensive to just let good meat rot.)

The most important reason in that list must be stressed; winter is CRUEL to ShadowClan. The RiverClan river is a moving source of water which rarely completely ices over, most animals in ThunderClan don't hibernate, WindClan's rabbits are active in the snow. For most Clans, they will not feel the "bite" of winter until towards the end, when the prey populations crash. ShadowClan feels it immediately.

That's a problem because Prey Item Number 1 Will Surprise you. The most popular prey in ShadowClan is...

1: Ducks.

And with the most common species, mallards, at about 2 pounds on average (with males being slightly larger) you're looking at 5,442 calories each. Enough to feed 15 warriors for a day.

(Note: This estimate is low; actual value would probably be higher. This measurement is taken from this chart which measured whole carcasses and caloric value rounded from 5.9 to 6, and this particular duck was "dressed"-- so its organs, the most valuable part of the animal, were already removed.)

Ducks are SO valuable as prey it's hard to oversell them. They're huge, they're highly nutritious (thiamin, vitamin a, vitamin b, iron), and they're PACKED with fats. They also lay eggs, TONS of them, which ShadowClan will happily snatch from inattentive hens.

The problem with ducks is, they don't stick around in the winter. Mallards might stay if the weather is mild, but if the water starts freezing, they're a-leaving.

That means that right when ShadowClan needs them the most, they'll vanish. If the marsh freezes, which is VERY likely because it's stillwater, they can't access ANYTHING under the ice. So Prey Animal Number 2 ALSO becomes an issue;

2: Carp

Their size and weight varies immensely, but the european carp is a species that AVERAGES 6 - 15 pounds. Using our rough estimation numbers and only a 6 pound fish, that's 10,884 calories. That's a whole Clan fed, if it's rationed perfectly.

Many carp are larger and heavier than cats. Here is a picture of a human fisher with two 5-pound bass so you can get a feel for just how big fish are

The biggest problem with carp, aside from the fact that icy winter conditions will block access to catching them, is that their gallbladders are poisonous. Carp bile is the only dangerous type of bile Clan cats encounter (that I know about so far). When being eaten, Clan cats must take care to gut them gently and remove the organ without spilling toxic green slime everywhere.

(ShadowClan actually collects and uses this bile for other purposes. Dried and diluted, it can be used as a medicine for treating parasites, and wet and mixed into a poultice it can be used to dress wounds. If gargled, it can also dissolve and loosen stuck bones in the throat, VERY important for unknowing kittens who tried to eat cooked bird bones.)

These two are the most common animals in the highly varied ShadowClan diet. Hunt in the shallow marsh, and you're bound to bump into either a duck or a carp at some point.

But when winter rolls in, they start to rely on mammalian prey.

3: Rats

While some rats can breach 2 pounds (SHOUT OUT TO ALL MY NEW YORKERS) most of them only clock in at about half a pound-- 250 grams. That's 1,250 calories. About 3 cats fed.

(NOTE: These estimations of how MANY cats they feed assumes that these bites are being distributed evenly, such as if the animal was being put into a soup or meticulously portioned. It's more likely that a single rat is eaten alone or only shared between two warriors who then bulk up. The sensation of "fullness" is determined by weight rather than caloric value.)

Rats are highly adaptable omnivores, but most of their diet is actually plants! Humans associate them with garbage and filth, and yes, the rats from carrionplace would certainly taste awful. But most of the rats ShadowClan catches would be living in natural conditions, eating nuts, fruits, and smaller animals. So it doesn't make sense that canon sees ALL rats as dirty-- they should actually be a HUGE part of a warrior's diet!

Especially in ShadowClan, where the invasive brown rat has all but eliminated the native black rat population. Brown rats are huge, thick-tailed, excellent swimmers who stick around in the winter and find themselves right at home in a marsh or swamp.

In fact, ShadowClan thinks hunting them is a two-way blessing. A cat stays fed through the winter, and more resources are freed up for the rarer, but more delicious water vole. ThunderClan isn't the only Clan that understands population management.

And speaking of...

4: Squirrels

Significantly smaller than carp and ducks, gray squirrels are usually about 500 grams. I've heard it said that they triple in mass over the winter, but since I'm not sure if that means they triple in weight, I'll simply rule that a wintertime gray squirrel is 1000 grams. Which means about 5,000 calories, enough to feed 14 cats.

...but also. don't underestimate how big a squirrel is. You are a 200-pound bipedal ape, these are 10 pound cats. They are also eating all the organs you, a human, would usually toss.

The general term, wetland, refers to all land that is... take a guess... wet. The difference between a marsh and a swamp is that a swamp is wooded land, which means squirrels can live there!

ShadowClan often finds itself in conflict with ThunderClan over squirrels. The native, endangered red squirrel is a cultural icon to ThunderClan and they believe it's important to protect it at all costs by killing gray squirrels whenever possible. ShadowClan, meanwhile, agrees red squirrels are beautiful, but isn't willing to be aggressive with gray squirrel populations to protect them.

5: Cheating

In true ShadowClan fashion I do what I want and use number 5 to babble about several animals they turn into grub

And SPEAKING of grubs, they love to forage for larval treats. They regularly make snacks out of chafer grubs, stag beetle larvae, cutworms, and if they can manage it, baby honeybees. Chafer grubs are their absolute favorite, which is another reason why WindClan is so passionate about maintaining their moorland; when it turns into grassland, ShadowClan is energized to fight for grub foraging space.

The "problem" with the meat of predators is that it's said to be tough and taste strong and unpalatable. ShadowClan doesn't entirely mind it, but if they end up with a predator in spring and summer, they like to use the seasonal stream (called a syke) that cuts across ThunderClan to soak the meat in running water for a few days.

Not to mention that they really will just grab at any animal, in addition to those lizards and frogs they're notorious for. Hedgehogs, crayfish, waterbirds, snails. There's all sorts of spices they'll use to try to season a strange meat, between mushrooms, pellitory, juniper, rosemary, so on.

It's harder to find something they WON'T eat.

[wolf-tail]

Since I'm far more comfortable being weird on 40k tumblr than I used to be, I'm gonna say some unhinged things.

Now that you've all been thoroughly warned, I'm thinking about which Primarchs would be the best or worst to deal with if they got pregnant:

Lion-You do not know he is pregnant. He would preffer it that way. He seems crankier, meaner, more reclusive, amd just a bit rounder, but you don't know about it until he winces and slinks off during a meeting, then returns a few hours later with babby in tow. No one is allowed to touch or even look at babby for at least a week.

Guilliman-He's doing pretty ok, but very anxious. Lots of body aches, but you have a hell of a time trying to convince him to ease off the work and rest. You often find him fast asleep on top of his desk. Constantly craving olives. Overall not too bad.

Horus-VERY proud papa-to-be. Constantly showing off his big ol belly and bragging about how knocked up he is. He has a canonical breeding kink, he's wearing every embarrassing maternity t-shirt he can find. Mortifying ordeal, but could be way worse.

Konrad-OH GOD, whoever impregnated this man, answer for your fucking crimes. Anyone who so much as breathes too loud in his vicinity is a skinless splatter on the pavement. Mercifully, he doesn't seem to want to leave his room. Just avoid him as much as possible and you might survive.

Sanguinius-Glowing, positively GLOWING! He's vibrant, elegant, happy, the type of thing people tell you being pregnant is like to try and convince you to have kids. Happy to let anyone rub his tummy. (Would he even give live birth or just lay an egg?) He's eepy, so very sleeby eepy. He just wants to nap. That just serves to make it cuter. The only issue is that in the later weeks he starts going broody. That will not be a fun time.

Fulgrim- Also an idealistic glowing beauty, but probably is a struggling a lot more than he lets on. You just know he's nauseous as hell and his feet hurt like a bitch. Give him a foot rub , he deserves it. Has a bunch of super long baby names picked out, Definitely rearranged the nursery seventeen times at least because it's "not good enough". And the second fact that thing comes out the womb it's dripped tf out. Little fuck is leaving the hospital in a Dior onesie. Fulgrim insists on doing his makeup before leaving the maternity ward, because he refuses to look as worn out as he is. Let this poor man REST.

Ferrus-Oof. I don't know much about him, but he strikes me as the type to have body image issues. Baby has a normal ass name like "John" or smth. When it's born he's scared to hold it with his metal hands, but bub doesn't care, falls right asleep in them.

Perturabo-ABORTION. He has no time for kids. But in the chance he does keep it, he's even more cranky and insufferable than ever. Yells at his own belly bc MiniPerty is kicking him while he's trying to work. Sending u prayers🙏

Dorn-Hmmm, idkkkk. I have not read enough about him. Dorn fans answer this one for me. But from what I do know he'd have a hard time describing as his complicated emotions about it. Would swaddle the Dornling in his grandpa's blanket.

Angron-OH FUCCKKKKKKK. You thought Konrad was bad!? The sad part is, all of the parts of him that want and love the baby are being punished for it by the nails. But can you fucking imagine a pregnant hormonal Angron!? The galaxy shakes in fear. The second sperm met egg, Khorne shifted uncomforably upon the Skull Throne.

Magnus-He's having a great time! Studying every parenting book he can find (TAKE NOTES EMPS!), getting cool belly tattoos, doing mysterious pregnancy rituals, psychically communicating with MiniMagnus once they're developed enough. Has a BIG belly, sometimes hard to maneuver. Probably twins. Sons always happy to give it a lil rub when he walks last. Often found lounging in his tower, lazily talking to bubby while reading, go ahead and give him a back massage.

Mortarion- As much as I think he'd look cute with a baby, I don't think he was ever at any point in his life healthy enough to carry one to term. Isha, fix his uterus, he needs to be a daddy immediately. If he was miraculously to get preggers, he'd definitely be cranky, but not overwhelmingly so. He'd love the kid, but occasionally pat his tummy and gently admonish it for being such a little nuisance.

Corax- Drawing a total blank here. Raven guardies tell me plz. But he might go broody too, goes with the bird theming.

The Khan- Continues riding his bike until he's physically too big to do so. You can't even try to stop him. Little Jag is travelling at Mach Fuck You every day. Labor is 5 seconds long, and as soon as the kid's delivered he's strapping it to his chest and getting right back in the saddle.

Vulkan-Biggest cuddlebug EVER!!! Joyous and glowing, always up for a belly rub. You just know his ass is 8 months pregnant and still in the forge, working on little practice weapons for his lil Salamander. His water will probaby break and he'll beg you to let him quench a sword in his own amniotic fluid (don't, that's gross) Prone to hot flashes, get him a nice cold drink plz.

Lorgar-A baby is joyous blessing! He's insanely happy about it, going on about how his body was "chosen to bring forth a wondrous being". Touching the tum is a religious experience. Gets a new tattoo to celebrate, if he can find the room.

Alpharius/Omegon: You either have no idea which one's pregnant, or they all somehow get pregnant at once. Twins are a guarantee either way.

[ttkinnie]

Tokyo Revengers characters as animals 💖 (for no reason)

Kazutora: let's start with the most obvious one, our resident tiger. Which is funny considering he gives 0 tiger vibes. Or maybe rescued declawed tiger from an abusive circus. Wait a sec... Hanma and Kisaki have a circus theme going on... why did I never notice this? This starts well. Saddest tiger pic I could find

Baji: A black gray wolf of course. 'nuff said

Chifuyu: A cat. Kitty kitty meow meow. Not crazy enough to be orange, but he's gotta have green eyes and a kind face. This tuxedo:

Koko: Talking about cats, here he is. Most obvious choice I've ever made. Black cat of course, very fancy, will knock shit off the counter and eats only the most expensive wet food

Inupi: second most obvious one because you've gotta pick the race of the dog too. I say he's the only serious golden retriever you've ever seen.

Takemichi: A mouse. He is squeaky and scared, looks like he eats cheese. Very cute. Big eyes.

Hinata: A doe, beautiful and kind but will ram into you if you touch her loved ones

Naoto: a buck because I am unoriginal. he does give off buck vibes tho

Hanma: I know the official art makes him a caracal but I love being contradictory so maned wolf it is. Plus look at its long legs and creepy demeanor, it's him

Kisaki: Listen, I am not the most partial person when it comes to him. He's my little meow meow, I wanna put either cat or bunny ears on him and squish his cheeks. But! Let's be honest, that boy is a snake. The deadliest snake in the world, the saw scaled viper, not the most venomous but highly aggressive. He eats mouse Takemichi for breakfast. Also look at its scales, they remind me of his adult hair.

Mikey: A honey badger, small and cute but will bite your balls off and kill your family for fun.

Draken: A lion, beautiful mane and a symbol of strength. Lives among a tribe of lionesses (lucky him)

Mitsuya: I do not like spiders. At all. But an animal literally producing silk is the only choice for Mitsuya. However I am not masochistic so i won't put a spider image, just the web

Taiju: Great white shark. Very smooth skin. Anyone who tells you they have sandpaper skin is lying.

Hakkai: A seal, same eyes, same innocence, favorite prey of the great white shark

Yuzuha: An orca, beautiful but deadly. Only predator of the great white shark. Also eats seals but let's not comment on that. I support women's wrongs.

Pah-chin: it's too cliché to put warthog here, so i won't. He's a cane toad, one of the stupidest animal on Earth, one of their most common cause of death is eating shit they shouldn't because they stuff their mouth without thinking. They also hump anything, including dead animals from another species, and lay their eggs anywhere, which leads to a high mortality rate among their offspring. Why did I give so many facts? I don't know. Look at it.

Peh-yan: A tarsier. it's the eyes.

Sanzu: Arctic hare, crazy eyes and a gift for divination if you can understand his language

Senju: a cutie baby. Bunny x2, will kick you.

Takeomi: a rat. I am not a hater, rats can be cute, but this guy definitely gives off rat vibes

Wakasa: So very pretty. White leopard of course.

Benkei: A bull. I always thought his tattoos were a bull, but I was wrong I just looked it up. Still a bull.

Shinichiro: This one was though, but I'd say a koala. I'm partial about it, but I feel like he would give his children poop to eat, and their reproductive habits are also not a good look on them.

Emma: Japanese dwarf flying squirrel because I play favorites and that's the cutest little furball ever. it looks like it's wearing eyeliner

Izana: Another small but deadly thing, the Australian box jellyfish, found notably along the coast of Malaysia (I feel so clever right now)

Kakucho: Fiercely loyal dog, he's a Rottweiler. Don't tell me Izana and him don't have some kind of puppy play going on.

Ran: Secretary bird. Canonically hates Kisaki which explains why he stomps snakes to death. Wears killer eyeshadow and looks like they hate your fashion style

Rindou: Did you know a group of male Pacific tree frogs is called a chorus? me neither, which is why Rindou is a Pacific tree frog. Peace of music, yeah

Mucho: Polar bear, cold and aggressive. Plus arctic hare and polar bear, there's a theme

[critical-birb]

Bird traits I want to know if Rito posess:

-Hollow bones so they're light enough to fly. Wouldn't this make them kinda glass canon fighters? Fragile lads.

-The ability to see way more colours than humans/other species can because of their extra cones. Apparently birds can see patterns on Human skin we don't even realise we have. Is Rito vision also uber-colourful?

-Swallowing food whole because they have no teeth. Relying on their gizzard to do the breaking down of food. Rito clearly cook - are they making themselves cakes and pies and then just....swallowing them whole??? Does the concept of chewing make sense to them?

-They have significantly less taste buds than most mammals, and also lack the ability to experience spice. How bland is Rito food?

-Birds don't sweat, they release heat through their tongues by panting. Do Rito pant??? That's an unsettling mental image.

-Birds go to the bathroom and lay their eggs through the same opening, which is horrifying enough. Most bird species lay infertile eggs either periodically or via hormone stimulation induced by feelings of safety. Is laying eggs like having periods to Rito?

-I don't need to tell you how birds feed their young. I fear considering this.

-A lot of bird species will instinctively go to sleep if plunged into darkness (hence why people put little caps over trained birds eyes, or throw blankets over budgie cages at night). If you covered a Rito's eyes, would they doze off?

-Do you think they go through nesting periods like birds do when it's egg laying season? Desperately hunting for soft things by instinct.

Feel free to add more bird facts. It's the middle of the night and I'm just fascinated thinking of the logistics and just how similar or not they would be to real birds.

[yanderes-galore]

yandere pets🐱🐶? Reader either accidentally eats something weird or comes into contact with alien pollen that makes the Xenomorphs reject their current Queen n make them view reader as their new “leader”. They become overprotective domestic pets. Platonic ofc

I love the idea but I'll do a version closer to canon if that's fine ^^

Yandere! Xenomorphs Seeing You As Queen/Leader

Pairing: Platonic/Pet-Like

Possible Trigger Warnings: Female/Gender-Neutral Darling, Overprotective behavior, Stalking, Kidnapping, Territorial/Possessive behavior, Forced companionship.

This idea reminds me of something similar to the fourth Alien movie.

In this case you'd be similar to Ripley 8, some sort of experiment involving a human harboring Xenomorph DNA.

This would naturally make you connected to the Xenomorphs.

However, the non-canon Alien pollen also seems like an interesting idea.

Maybe the "spores" seep into your skin and make you smell like a Xenomorph, somehow altering your DNA in the process?

These are the ideas I came up with that could make this concept work.

We haven't really seen Xenomorphs reject a Queen, however I could have missed it in lore.

As a result I would assume they'd react similarly to insects: they'd most likely kill the old Queen if they are somehow attached to you.

It's that or the Queen has already died at some point and the Hive is looking for a new one.

Which makes them choose you due to your smell.

I'd assume this concept would go like this, you have a whole Hive under your control.

It doesn't matter if you like it or not, the Xenomorphs see you as their new "Queen" regardless of gender.

While they would prefer you stay in their Hive, Drones would try to follow you just about anywhere.

Honestly towards you they may just act like pets.

You can't lay eggs or reproduce so the colony is doomed to be small.

That is unless a small group of Drones break off with you while a new Queen actually settles in the Hive.

If we go with that idea then I suspect you'd have about six-ish Drones following you at all times.

Obviously if they all saw you as leader than they'd fiercely protect you.

Even if this is a small group that separates from the rest of the Hive, they'd probably try to make your home a new Hive.

Wherever you live this new group will infest, they think they're helping.

After all they only know Hives as homes, they have no idea you live differently.

Expect the waxy and wet coating of Xenomorph Hives to quickly coat a sections of your home.

I'd assume they'd pick one of three places; your basement (if you have one), attic (if you have one), or your bedroom.

They'll make a section of your living space theirs then try to drag you into it as their leader/Queen.

You'll notice they smell rather acidic/earthy... yet they don't have a strong smell.

Even if you already smell like a Xenomorph I can see them trying to rub against you or cuddle you to make the pheromone smell stronger.

Xenomorphs would most likely be territorial of their new leader and home.

You can't really prevent it, either.

Better hope no friends come over as they'll be quickly attacked by one or two of the large Drones.

You may not even get to experience human contact again.

Your new Xenomorph followers would probably find a new place to make a nest then just drag you there.

Humans are a great source of hosts, yet they see them as too dangerous for you to be around.

They could harm the colony.

They could harm their Queen.

As a result, your overprotective Xenomorph pets would most likely become territorial to the point your life is now in isolation.

Sadly, you don't have a choice in the matter...

Until you eventually pass... you'll be their Queen/leader... away from humanity until something changes (if it even does).

[absurdumsid]

I need info on saejun an you obviously know him better than me, so can i have you favorite hcs, theories (how he joined the mtt), or interactions on him w/ the mtt :)

OF COURSE U CAN !! so sorry, it took me a bit to compile all of this from my older notes aaaa have a compensation doodle bc i took SOO long GHGHHHGH

anyway saejun nation pspspspss

saejun !! THE beloved if u will

he regularly speaks korean but learned english after meeting nightmare and killer

i love to think he's very very strong, he can beat the mtt in a fistfight kind of strong (not like he would, but he'd win)

he can cook decently but he'd choose his brother's cooking any day (even if pilsu is still um learning)

he also really likes spicy dishes !! he bonds over that with dust !

he'd forgive ppl who steal from the farm but he wouldn't forgive harming the crops

he HATES pesticides (i think this is canon actually) but also really hates strong smells in general

sleepy 24/7 he lays in the grass to photosynthesize (he just passes out, pilsu wakes him almost every time)

probably knows a lot of offhand herbology/biology trivia (he can explain the aerobic and anaerobic cycle by heart)

his general attitude toward the mtt/bad sanses is not to pry unless they're the ones who open up to him (even now he only rlly learns about their situations through nightmare who doesn't talk that much about it anyway)

he accepts mtt with open arms and its that accepting (almost forgiving) nature that makes them so super attached to him !!

for me, it's the concept of meeting a version of yourself that lives the most peaceful life and being happy for him, but ALSO not being shunned by that alternate version for being violent and hurting the people that you both love

as for how saejun met mtt, my general interpretation of it is that nightmare struck a deal with saejun for food supplies in exchange for manual labour (so mtt and nightmare help a lot with the harvests! the only ones who really know about it is pilsu, saejun, anseung, and suggu)

killer // 고통씨 (Mr. Misery/Grief)

saejun meets killer first and was the only one helping around the farm

i don't think saejun would be the type to pry into their pasts so he doesn't question killer about himself or anything

killer is the one who opens up to him one stormy night after a stage 3 episode where he holed himself up in the shed and saejun found him cold, shaking, and curled up embracing himself

he calms killer down and tells nightmare abt it and that's how he finds out about killer's past (he doesn't bring it up, but he's always there to help killer after his panic attacks)

he likes to do the chores with killer most of the time just in case he has a run in with chorongi or suggu (the kids are very silly and tend to mess with him and he doesn't know how killer is with children)

they photosynthesize together and sometimes nightmare just comes to get killer in the evening and finds them in the grass

horror // 취급주의 (Handle with Care) or 주주씨 (Mr. Vermillion)

he meets horror second (after he gets kidnapped by nightmare) and saejun isn't really scared of him because he figured that he probably has some hidden issues like killer

saejun thought horror was really fragile at first (because he was very thin and had a skull injury) so he actually had him do mostly little chores like going to the market or gathering eggs from the chickens

after a few months killer doesn't come in (was sent to a mission somewhere else) and saejun needs someone to handle the heavy hay bales (<- he could've done it himself but hes lazy) and horror just kinda Does It and surprises saejun

he starts to depend on horror more and actually admits that he was underestimating him out of concern for his wellbeing and horror says its ok because he was also underestimating saejun (until he saw him carry killer AND a bunch of crops home that one time)

they start to cook together and do the heavier chores (while making silly jokes abt killer) together

horror starts to learn korean by talking with dorihye, saejun, and pilsu as well as asking nightmare for some reading material ! (after finding out that dust also speaks korean, he starts practicing conversation with him !)

dust // 유골씨 (Mr. Ashes)

saejun's meeting with dust was noooot planned at all, nightmare just kinda forced mtt into a portal to farmtale during one of errors visits

horror mostly stayed with dust at first who was just dead silent and stayed in one spot (saejun asked if he wanted any drinks and it took ten excruciating seconds before horror had to answer water for him)

its not until pilsu comes into the house and greets killer and horror and makes a remark about a new brother that he starts to actually talk

dust doesn't exactly warm up to pilsu and more like forces himself to because pilsu starts to ask him what his favourite pasttimes are, his favourite food, if he wants any snacks, etc (killer and horror went through the same thing)

dust eventually gets carried off to the kitchen to cook with pilsu and that's how pilsu finds out dust speaks fluent korean even though they have different dialects

saejun goes into the kitchen and has a little talk with dust (where he learns they both speak korean !! and that that's why dust wasn't speaking that much !) and they bond over pilsu's silliness (dust talks about how his papyrus also loved to cook etc etc, saejun notices that its in past tense but doesn't dig any deeper)

dust eventually starts to visit farmtale with horror frequently to exchange makguksu and ramyeon recipes with pilsu !!

dust is also relatively close with dorihye, anseung, and suggu who tend to remark that "the other saejuns dont really talk much" to which horror always chuckles

that's all (for now) !! TYSM FOR ASKING ABT MY BLORBOS BGHGHRGRHG

[bamfkeeper]

NSFW Alphabet: Azazel

a/n: I saw Deadpool & Wolverine today and since Azazel was in the movie, I had to get this out. It's been in my drafts for days ;;. I missed him so much, and it was so cool to see him on the big screen again. I'll get some Sabretooth stuff out soon too. If people like this character I will write more but as far as hcs and fics I probably won't write too much about him. Please refer to SFW version, this character is a little darker themed, so naturally so is he intimately. Afab reader, mentions of knife play.

Minors DNI. 18+ under the cut.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex):

Azazel isn't super interested in aftercare. His idea of it is pretty basic, and he would probably think that simply laying beside you after is good enough.

I can see during more intense sessions that he might be more forward with touches. He would mostly let you take care of yourself, leave you to bathe or do what you need on your own while he stays laying in bed coming down from his high.

If you're particularly bruised up, he might help a bit more, but he still watches and lets you take care of yourself. He doesn't like getting too involved. I can see him giving in if you really, really beg him to help if you are sore or hurt in any way, for the sake of keeping you satisfied enough.

I think something subtle and 'good enough' for him would be letting you snuggle into him and he just lets you. He might drag his nails up and down your back while you calm down and relax, or his tail caresses your bruises where he might've whipped you with it yes this will happen.

When you get more into your relationship and start to have harder sessions where his kinks come out more, he realizes he needs to do a little better in this department so he makes more of an effort. He loves to feel how you shake for him, it makes him feel so much pride in himself.

I wanna imagine his red bamfs being let into the room once you're done and they curl up against you, their warm bodies providing comfort too. The little guys don't know what happened, but they can sense exhaustion and slight pain from you so they lay with/on you.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s):

He loves a curvy lady. I think he has a thing for wide hips and he strikes me as a boob kind of guy. But he loves a good ass too. He likes to smack your ass when he has sex, listening to your noises and watching you struggle a little as he marks your backside up with handprints.

On himself, I think everything makes sense.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically):

He's fairly clean with it, but he can be a little messy towards you. He either cums inside you or on your face if you're blowing him.

He likes to watch you swallow his spunk, or he likes seeing his messy he can make you by releasing on your face.

His cum is thicker than normal, it's slightly more solid than an egg white consistency, and he tastes a bit salty. But it's mild enough to be doable if you swallow.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs):

Honestly Azazel is pretty open to things he wants, so I don't think he'd keep many secrets. I think instead he'd just never admit to specific things he likes or enjoys. Something like you holding onto him and snuggling him he might enjoy but never admit to it.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?):

This man has has sex with dozens of women (canon). He knows what to do. He's incredibly skilled, and he's learned how to do things to make you squirm that no other man could possibly think to do.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying):

He'd like any position where he feels in charge. I think you riding him would be one of his favorites because you are doing most of the work and he can see how desperate you are for him. He can sit back and watch.

Or doggy just to grab onto you and drill you. I can also see something basic like missionary but he throws your legs around and almost bends you in half in how he fucks you.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.):

I think Azazel would be pretty serious because he thinks of intimacy as a time where he can be passionate and he doesn't really think about being silly.

I do think he would make sexual comments in a teasing manner, because he finds teasing to be 'funny' but that is about the extent of being goofy for him.

If you laughed or giggled during sex, he might be a little caught off guard and insulted depending on the situation, but if he sees you're enjoying himself he will just keep doing what he's doing.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.):

He takes pride in his appearance, so he is groomed well below the belt. He keeps everything tight, and that shorter cut does feel good to ride on because it rubs your clit just right.

Sometimes he lets it grow out but for the most part he likes a more neat trim than letting it get too crazy.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect):

He's generally pretty rough, but in a passionate way. He likes to do whatever he feels like, even with a hard smack there is a caress that comes after so it's not like he's full out making things uncomfortable.

Azazel has the ability to be romantic too, and he is when he wants you to do something or try something new. He tries to make it sound sweet and desirable. Think the devil trying to convince you of something. He's a smooth talker and absolutely knows how to woo you and get you in the mood.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon):

He does from time to time, but it's not a super driven thing for him. If he has a partner he doesn't do it a whole lot. He rarely feels turned on enough to jerk himself off, especially if he's with you. He can just have you assist him with his little problem.

Though every now and then I can see him masturbating if he's super pent up and hasn't had a lot of time to let it out. Does he use his tail on himself? Maybe?

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks):

Oh boy. He has quite the array of things he likes.

Dominance and submission, he is 100% dominant and he would expect his partner to be subservient to him. That is the only way he would be romantically involved with someone, I just can't see him in a role other than dominant. It gives him the power he seeks and makes him feel good to have someone so obedient. He might even go as far as slave play, which can be rather degrading, but anything that gives him that power rush.

Worship, he keeps up with the demon aesthetic so obviously that comes with the desire to be worshiped. He loves the idea of it, and he adores when you treat him as such. Worshipping his very being would get him so turned on, body worship to him is also a huge thing.

BDSM stuff would also be in his ballpark. He dabbles, and he likes to use his tail a lot. He uses it to restrain your wrists, or he uses it to whip your body. He is a bit of a sadist so anything that leaves a mark on you is very attractive to him. He loves to choke you with his tail, just as your cheeks heat up and you feel light headed. He has you suck on his spade while he chokes you.

Degrading/humiliation is also something he absolutely loves. It plays hand in hand with his other kinks, because you being so willing to do whatever he says and endure what he wants is something he will never get tired of. He loves having such a dedicated pet partner.

Exhibitionism always interested him. He's possessive of you, like a toy or property. He wants everyone to know it, so much so that he'd screw you in front of anyone he felt like if it meant they knew who you belonged to. But he wouldn't allow anyone else to touch you, he's too greedy for that.

Knife play would be something he would dabble in, all depending on your reaction. He likes seeing you squirm, and he knows just how much pressure to put against your skin. He is careful about it, but if you give him the green light to actually break skin he will without hesitation. Nothing severe, just shallow marks. If you're really wanting to show your dedication to him, he might carve his initial into you.

Orgasm denial. He loves the control, and he often teases and denies you until your cheeks are wet with tears and you are begging him for an orgasm. He loves to see you so desperate, and once he gets you to that point, he gladly obliges.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do):

As mentioned, he isn't opposed to doing it in public. He will fuck you anywhere he damn well pleases. And if you get too overwhelmed or uncomfortable, it's easy to just teleport away.

Without being obvious or vocal about it, he will think about your preferences. If you like it best behind closed doors, so be it. As long as he gets to fuck, he doesn't really care.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going):

He adores being praised, because it makes him feel important. He's a power driven man, so anywhere he can get that hit he takes it.

Any sort of behavior where you worship him, so any kind of intense compliments will get him going.

You can never go wrong with submissive behavior, either. Doing what he says when he says it, he likes that you just do as he asks. It makes him want to reward you.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs):

He wouldn't do anything that would cause you severe injury. He can't have you hurt now can he? He doesn't want that. A few bruises and scrapes during sex with him is normal and you get used to it, but anything that would cause permanent damage or injury he wouldn't do.

As knife play was mentioned, if you allowed him to carve you he'd make a deal where he would ensure the wound is dealt with properly. Or any little cuts he gives your skin. Anything more severe that would break your skin whether it be from a knife, his tail, or other instruments, he will clean for you as a reward for enduring his harder play.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.):

He's quite selfish, he likes receiving better than giving. He loves to see his dick in your mouth because to him, you're using everything you have to please him. For Azazel, every hole you have is his to use. But he will make sure you enjoy yourself.

When giving, he's quite skilled since he's got the experience. He can make you cum quick, or drag it out. He loves to tease and make you beg before letting you cum. By default, he won't give you full on head, but he will lap and lick enough for you to become more slick for fucking.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.):

He can be pretty much anything. He generally likes to take his time, make you squirm and whine and plead with him. But once he gets going he is mostly pretty rough.

If you are sore or recovering from a hard session and you have sex, he will reign it in and go a bit slower than normal.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.):

He'd rather not do quickies because he likes to have the time to fully use you. For him, a good face fuck is a quickie.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.):

Absolutely down to experiment. He does so many things to you, if you brought something up to try, he'd be willing to experiment.

Azazel also takes risks of course, he teleports you all over the place to fuck for fun.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?):

He has decent stamina. Sex with him feels drawn out because most of the play is with tools or a lot of foreplay. He also doesn't let you cum for a good majority of it so it feels like a really good orgasm when he finally lets you.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?):

He owns a lot of BDSM related toys. All of the things he has are for you, he doesn't have anything specific for himself. He's never been interested in using anything on himself.

I can see maybe using a vibrator against his cock to stimulate himself slightly, but that would be the extent of using anything on himself.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease):

Azazel teases you to tears, literally. He's not satisfied until you have them streaming down your cheeks and you are begging for an orgasm, or for more.

On the opposite end, he does not like being teased. If you're blowing him and you pop off before he cums, he will grab your head and fuck your throat until he does, just to ensure you know who's in charge and who can tease.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.):

He makes grunts and groans, but he mostly dirty talks you. His voice is deep and gravelly, but it can be smooth and enticing when he wants it to be. We've heard it briefly in First Class, but if you are focused on the comic more than the film, I imagine a voice similar to Black Phillip, maybe slightly deeper with a growl to it.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character):

He likes his tail sucked on, the tip of his tail is sensitive and he gets pleasure from it. Not like his cock, but it would be like the pleasure from a hickey. Enough of a sensation to turn you on or get you heavily in the mood.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes):

Azazel is super prideful about himself, and you would think that contrasts his actual self but it doesn't.

He has an impressive cock, it's red like his body and it gets darker red towards the tip. It looks like he dipped it in blood, it's such a pretty mixture of red shades.

His size varies, but generally speaking he is between 7-8 inches and he's girthy. He has prominent veins, surprisingly fairly symmetrical. They run on the sides of him that feel really nice when he's inside you.

He has nicely sized balls too, which he does like fondled.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?):

His drive isn't that high, but he's always down to fuck if you are. Depending on his mood he is more open to spontaneous sex. He won't actively seek out sex constantly from you, especially considering if you took quite the session with him recently. He watches how you move around too. If you're limping he backs off. But if you seem okay, then he will make a move and see if you're receptive.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards):

He doesn't fall asleep quick, he knows there are things to take care of first. Even after the clean up, he will sit and wind down, having a drink as the high wears off.

Azazel lets you snuggle close, and even after you've fallen asleep, he will stay up for a bit. Eventually he will fall asleep next to you, he's very warm naturally so your sleeping body instinctively will press into him. His warmth feels good against your bruises.

He also likes to wrap his tail around you, loosely, an ankle or wrist, just to hold onto you more. Especially if he is turned away from you, his tail will remain for silent reassurance he's there.

Thanks for reading. <3

*BAMF*

dividers by @/adornedwithlight

Cover photo from Amazing X-Men #1 (2014)

[compsonn]

Most Well-Written Fics 2024

back at it again for the third year in a row!! personal favorites from this year across multiple fandoms!

no particular order, just based on the order of my bookmarks.

for reference i am sooo picky, i have read over 6000 fics according to ao3, and i've read 700 since the beginning of the year. i only have 53 bookmarks in total... but here are some bookmarked fics i read this year!!!

this year i got into some random shit, blah blah blah, honestly most of these are not faulkner levels of literature doing monuments for the english language but they were good and make me feel a sort of way, so, here you go

Harry Potter (Drarry)

This Year's Love by trishjames / drarry E, longfic. love it a lot. genuinely made me want to become an adult. they were meant to be cry emoji

Yes, But It'lll Cost You by mintaminta / drarry T, privated. this one had such a good vibe, reminds me of fun and school and calm darkness. very nice.

Bad Habits by No_One_Special_01289 / drarry E, lowkey porn, longfic. those last few chapters got me SO hard, they love each other omg cry emoji. poor harry. i think i skipped most of the smut when i read it but the plot was so good. literally star crossed lovers UGHHHHH LET THEM BE TOGETHER

Recursion by tessacrowley / drarry E, longfic. its written really well and it's witty, but i kind of think this author just self-inserts herself for draco in all her fics because... that boy was soo pathetic in canon. genius au basically. but i can forgive her bc the fics are good

House M.D. (Hilson)

yes Medical Malpractice Husbands whatever shut up i like the fics and they're probably in love so leave me BE. these fics are good.

Look, Don't Touch by ORiley42 / hilson E, voyeurism fic.... guys HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUT OK that makes it sound SOOO bad but trust me i bookmarked this one because the author took such a horrible trope and made it genuinely not feel that creepy. like this fic is SO funny. it's really good. and the author is straight up just a good writer

the sea and the sky and you and i by thismagichour / hilson M, hanahaki angst. its really good because wilson just gives up and its soo heart wrenching bc he thinks house doesnt like him back and just wants to die. poor guy.

My Hero Academia (Dabihawks)

i have not given a Phuque about MHA for the past five years but i had this phase this year where i was briefly re-obsessed with dabihawks so here are some fics

planting trees (making shade) by nightquake / dabihawks T. basically hawks KHS for a good cause ..? really well written, has high tension and good allusions. loved this one. its the kind of fic u know is good by the summary

Hawks Lays an Egg by ButterflyApocalypse / dabihawks T. never in my entire Life 18 Years have i ever enjoyed mpreg except this fic, because he isnt even pregnant he just has this egg. it's such a good funny fic. i was asking myself why i had it bookmarked from like four years ago earlier this year so i reread it and i was like Yeah ok it deserves the bookmark. SOOO funny and ridiculous. crackiest fic.

MISC random fandoms (Battle Cats (????) and A Clockwork Orange)

nyankopalooza by Sanodigy / Battle Cats Game gen. No clue how i even found this. its so funny. ive never read a fic like this. its so funny. and weirdly well written, i like experimental / weirdly formatted fics. i used to play this game when i was a kid

Bitva Gruppa by VoidVesper / a clockwork orange X fight club, alex delarge X tyler durden E. its straight up a horrible plot, AKA CHILD GETS ASSAULTED. warning for underage and assault. it's not a morally good fic (clockwork orange is intentionally a morally wrong book). but holy shit the writing is great. like it reads like it's anthony burgess. just really good. probably one of the only fics here where i straight up bookmarked only because of the writing style

OK that wraps up this year's edition!! please give these fics a read, your life will be Fulfilled. byebyee

[daenystheedreamer]

Valyrian Pantheon Headcanons

We know the names of 5 of the Valyrian gods and that's it. We don't know anything about the practices or even what those gods were patrons of. Here is my headcanon reconstruction of the pantheon ^_^

I think the Fourteen Flames (the volcanoes) are named for fourteen gods who constitute the main pantheon, similar to the 12 Greek Olympians or the 12 Roman Dei Consentes. There are many minor gods, usually personifications of concepts like seasons/emotions.

I imagine them like Egyptian gods, who are personified sometimes as humans, sometimes as animals, sometimes as animal-headed humanoids. I imagine the main fourteen as dragons, though idk how silly that would look lol.

I think they were also androgynous gods. Why? That's fun. That's so fun. Dragons are theorised to be hermaphroditic/intersex who can change their sex at will, but also are referred to as she-dragons if they are confirmed to lay clutches of eggs. So some of these gods are gods, and some are goddesses, despite being a-gender

Canonical Gods

BALERION: I believe Balerion's name is at least a little inspired by Ba'al, an ancient Semitic god who was very important to the religions of the region (Canaan, Babylon, etc) and features as a false god in the Hebrew bible. I think he's the King of the gods, like Zeus. God of war or fire or conquest or all of the above. Many ancient gods shifted their patronage and powers.

VHAGAR: Consort of Balerion, similar to Hera. Goddess of war/wisdom, similar to Athena. I think this fits a person like Visenya.

MERAXES: Perhaps a concubine of Balerion? Like how Zeus had thousands of lovers. Metis, Leto, Demeter, etcetera. Goddess of love, because Rhaenys seems like a woman who enjoyed love and life. Perhaps also a goddess of marriage?

SYRAX: It's gotta be someone Rhaenyra would think is cool. Perhaps a goddess of the sun/moon? Another war goddess? A queen? Actually, perhaps Syrax is the Hera of the pantheon, while Vhagar is not necessarily virginal like Athena but 'unmarried' so to speak. Goddess of beauty/wealth would also fit Rhaenyra. Goddess of the sun or moon would be fun in opposition to Sunfyre.

BOASH: called 'The Blind God' Mentioned as the god the Lorathi worship, whose religious followers (dissidents of the Valyrian Freehold) founded the city of Lorath. The name doesn't follow the typical Valyrian naming traditions, perhaps he was originally Boax/Boaxes? Would be fun. He's a very esoteric god connected to 'higher truths', the priests are eunuchs and the followers are vegetarian teetotalers and a main tenant is that everyone is equal. They also wear hair shirts which is an old Christian practice. I think he's a version of a Valyrian death god

the BLACK GOAT: Whose followers founded Qohor. I think he's a minor god, perhaps of magic or agriculture even, agricultural deities tend to be very important to common folk. However the goat imagery evokes Satan and Baphomet, so I think a villainous or death deity would be fun.

Non-canonical gods

A lot of the Targ dragons are given names with similar naming style to the canonical god dragons.

VERMITHOR & VERMAX: The naming conventions of Vermax and Vermithor intrigue me... I think one is the name of the God and one is a theophoric name in reference to the god. Perhaps a god of justice, law, order, etc, since they were the dragons of Jaehaerys and Jacaerys and I can see them picking that kind of God.

ARRAX: Lucerys names his dragon this, so I think a coming-of-age god or god of youths would be fun since he, yknow, got eated at 14.

CARAXES: This is Daemon's dragon so I'm saying Caraxes is the Dionysus/Hermes trickster god. Daemon picking the bacchanalian drunk sex god for his dragon is real to me.

MELEYS: Rhaenys TQWNW's dragon. Rhaenys gives off SUCH demeter vibes idk so agricultural god would be fun but idk i don't think she'd pick something like that. Perhaps its based off of Meraxes since Rhaenys is her namesake. Perhaps an oceanic or weather-based god.

MORGHUL: Morghul is simply the word for death in High Valyrian e.g. 'Valar Morghulis', but I like it as a euphemistic name for a God of death. Like his name is so tabboo that you just refer to him as death, or he's just named death in relation to afterlife, like how Hades refers to both the god and the underworld. I think perhaps Boash and the Black Goat are actually interpretations/aspects of the same deity, perhaps a death - morghul - god.

SHRYKOS: Sick name sorry just had to say that. He's Jaehaerys (son of Helaegon)'s dragon. got no clue what he could be a god of cos jaehaerys is a plot device character. I think he's just a cool Valyrian word, like Morghul, since Jaehaerys and Jaehaera are twins. Be fun if they picked life/death dichotomy for their dragons :p

TERRAX: ridden by the pre-doom character Jaenara Belaerys, who flew further south in Sothoryos than anyone else. God(dess) of travel/wisdom/conquest/oceans would be fun since she's a traveller who flew across oceans and sort of exemplifies the Valyrian conquest/adventurer spirit.

TESSARION: Okay the blue queen has to be a goddess of the ocean or the sky<3

TYRAXES: Joffrey's dragon :) I think a god of animals would be cute also cos he sounds like T-rex. I would name my dragon T-rex. Possibly a bastardisation of Terrax though...

URRAX: This is the name of a legendary/fairytale dragon from the story of Serwyn and Daeryssa from the Age of Heroes. By Daeryssa's naming convention and the fact she is mentioned only in AGOT, I think she was perhaps supposed to be a Targaryen before GRRM had established a full history. I think he's just a bastardisation of perhaps a Valyrian god like Arrax.

So my vision of the Valyrian pantheon includes Balerion, Vhagar, Meraxes, Syrax, Vermithor, Arrax, Caraxes, Terrax, Tessarion, which is 9 gods

plus Meleys and Tyraxes who I'm not sure if I want to be referring to above gods or just the name of a god entirely, which makes 11

Adding a death god (Boash, Black Goat, Moghul) makes 12,

which leaves another two unnamed for my personal idea of a Valyrian pantheon :)

[askthatoneanacondraikaiguy]

Omg it's so random but Does Kai and Skylor still wear clothes to hide potential genitals from people ? If so, how Wu does get the clothes ? Because they're both pretty large and tall so they need extra sized clothe now.

Does Kai and Skylor still sleep in a bed ? You said they can pretty much curl on themselves and sleep anywhere but maybe they could sleep together in a king sized matress with a lot of warm blankets ?

Okay, yeah, that's definitely random! But, a reasonable question.

So, I'm gonna answer your ask in reverse, so that any snake people nudity can be included under a read more. Later, I'll post the illustration of Kai napping separately (with a matching Skylor art) too for people who wanna reblog that but not the rest of this answer.

As for beds, yeah, Kai and Skylor can still sleep in beds. They usually do. However, they are also very comfortable sleeping from suspended forms. Anacondrai would sleep in swamp trees and rainforest branches suspended over bodies of water for quick escapes and opportunistic hunting opportunities.

(I'm realizing now; considering how large Anacondrai can get, they almost definitely hunted gators at some point in history)

As for concern of nudity and clothes:

Skylor and Kai technically don't need to wear clothes, but it'd feel pretty weird if they didn't, like walking around in underwear but not pants; technically you're covered but Man It Feels Weird.

I personally HC that Skylor didn't get to pick out much of her wardrobe growing up with her father, so she's taking advantage of her new freedom to use it to express herself. She may have no control over being an Anacondrai or how that looks, but she has control over how she dresses now, and she embraces that.

in season 5, Wu apparently orders the Ninjas clothes? Not just the tea uniforms, it's suggested that their new ninja uniforms arrive that way too. He probably has a friend or something in textile and fashion work that he can call up for getting the clothes for his Ninja.

Skylor doesn't have that and I don't think she would have been taught how to alter clothes, but I figure she could go to Nya for help on that front. Nya designed her own Samurai suit (and also had more than a few hand-me-down outfits in her life), she definitely knows how to alter clothes to fit better. Kai is the one who suggests it when he sees Skylor struggling with, say, skirts designed for human waists and not Serpentine ones.

Further answer (including an illustration; not NSFW I don't think but there are no clothes) under the read more;

Snakes genitalia is internal, so, no, at any given point Kai and Skylor don't have to worry about it. The closest to that would be the pelvic spurs, but I HC those only occur on wild snakes and not on Serpentine. It's one of the ways you can tell a Serpentine newborn apart from a normal snake.

(Fun Fact: Anacondas are ovoviviparous, meaning they hatch their eggs internally and give birth to live young instead of laying eggs like Pythons)

(why'd I dedicate so much time to the lighting on the scales in this? No clue)

For some reason Aspheera canonically has breasts (or the implication of them in the contour of her clothing at least). But I refuse to think about what that implies for Serpentine as a whole. Skylor's transformation has basically just given her thicker scale armor across her chest.

I hope that answers your questions!

[howdoesagrapewrites]

𝐏𝐮𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐲𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

Cw: I'll use the canon ages for this piece, but this is not the case for all my work, gender neutral reader, may be kinda masc aligned, pre-atsv movie, no proofread, fluff, found family?

Hobie Brown x hispanic!punk!reader & Gwen Stacy (platonic)

It was the early morning, specks of not-so-warm sun would creep to your face and wake you up, Hobie was laying beside you, you didn't try to wake him up, you might as well try to wake up a rock. Hobie was a much heavier sleeper since his spidey senses kicked in, relaxing now that he had a clearer notion of danger, however, your spider senses did the opposite, leaving you alert at all times. You stretched, like a cat, groaning as you sensed the sleep wash off your body and put on sweatpants to go into the kitchen, you'd probably return to bed after eating, it had been almost a month since you were home. Almost a month listening to Miguel tell you that your mission was to "observe and report" an anomaly that may or may not happen. Almost a month of wanting to call off Miguel on his bullshit, for one, having the lamest most half-assed theory of what's "canon" and two, for giving you a boring job away from home.

As you set foot in your kitchen, you saw an unfamiliar figure, you put on a battle stance, who was this person? Why didn't your spidey senses warned you? Were you that tired? You examined how to proceed, the intruder seemed rather small, but you've seen some shit in the spider society and know that age or even species should not be a reason to underestimate your opponent, they were standing still next to the open pantry, they heard you, you run to them in an offensive stance, ready to fight, but she backs down, panics, and apologizes, you feel like a brick was comedically thrown your way as you realize you were about to throw hands with a sixteen year old.

"Ay, mija, I'm sorry-" you blurt out when she explains Hobie let her stay here, and she was also part of the spider society

"Do you think I can eat something? There's a lot of jars in here but I don't know what are they" she asked, still hesitantly

"Yeah, we have yogurt, fruit, granola, eggs"

Gwen accepted the granola, she had thought that Hobie would live off instant ramen or anything of that sorts. As you quietly shared breakfast with (a tense) Gwen, Hobie came into the living room and threw a shirt your way, you were very grateful as you were topless because you couldn't find you pajama shirt this morning (later saw Gwen was wearing it).

Hobie yawned loudly and opened his eyes widely remembering he forgot to introduce you two

"aye crap- forgot you were back, y/n, this' Gwen, 'been letting her crash for a few days"

You side eyed him, playfully feigning an angry expression before eating another bite of breakfast and ignoring him

Your guest saw this interaction and started stimming a bit

"Mornin' Hobie, I- I'm sure I can crash at Peter's or someone else's place tomorrow now that Y/N came back, thank you for letting me stay here" she tried to seem unbothered but it didn't really work

"No, no, I don't mind you staying here, I was just annoyed that this moron Hobie didn't told me and let me scare you this morning, you really can stay as long as you need"

Hobie hugged you from behind and kissed your cheek "no need to get aggressive, luv"

Gwen Stacy had went through a lot. A lot. Losing her best friend, a rather... Difficult relationship with her father, being technically a wanted criminal, but on top of that and more, Gwen was homeless, literally and emotionally.

She saw how some spiders were able to live a let's call it "normal" life, Peter B. Parker being a father, Hobie Brown having a stable relationship, Jessica Drew with a baby on the way, but there were others, Miguel, Peni, and maybe, her, Gwen really thought that she was one of those spidermans that had to fly solo, fight alone, after Peter's passing, she was sure she didn't want "distractions", but then Miles came along, and now he was lost too.

She was grateful for both you and Hobie housing her, and looking out for her, and even if she didn't want to admit it, you gave her a home again. The playful banter, the food waiting for them at home after a concert, your smile in the crowd cheering for both of them, the nicknames, the sleepovers with Pavitr, she had friends again, you and Hobie took the role of older siblings to her and Pav, even when Hobie was a force of chaos, he never badly endangered any of his loved ones.

Gwen was a little shy to admit how natural the domestic dynamic felt, like now, with her accompanying you to get "groceries", you talked the whole way walking across the grafitti filled streets, until getting to an abandoned building, not that she wasn't acquaintanced with crusty old sketchy buildings already (living with you two) but this was no supermarket.

"It doesn't look like there's groceries in here" she said with a quirked brow

"Just you wait" you responded as the door was opened and you said hi to the people inside, she waved back to the strangers that seemed to welcome you two, it was an odd crowd, but weren't all crowds odd? People of all ages, ranging from infants playing, to elders in battle jackets with antifa imagery. There were large windows that let the sun light up the place, this was probably a mansion in its glory days, multiple pots with different herbs and flowers were hanged in the walls, and a big open gate that showed the garden, with a small chicken coop and full of colorful and lively crops of vegetables and fruit trees.

"Ready to shop?" You asked with a toothy smile

"What?" Gwen followed you to the garden

You handed her a basket "Take what you'll eat, I'll get mine and Hobie's food"

"Like... Just take it?"

"Yep, take what you'll need, no more, no less, if you want eggs, they're inside, trust me, you don't want to get in that coop, el gallo is a fucking menace"

She took some fruits and other goods, you handed a lady another basket and then left with Gwen

"Did we just got all this for free?" The blonde asked staring at the basket full of food and ingredients

"Not really, I made a basket of pan de pascua and a pot of ropa vieja"

"Oh, so is like a trade, that makes more sense"

"I mean, if you ain't got nothing you can still take, you can also help around the garden and stuff. You see, Gwen, you can't be an anarchist if you don't give a shit about the people around you, the people in need. In a world like this, kindness is revolutionary."

Maybe Gwen was starting to understand a lot more than her canon had prepared for her.

[bonefall]

if rainflower was given a dishonor title, what would it be?

also is mapleshade still killed by crookedstar in the BOTTE?

Definitely something related to animals they disrespect. I don't see him going as far as to hit her with "Cuckoo" but he'd want to center her cruelty and lack of compassion. "Lamprey" makes a fine choice, and there's also a disrespectful word in Clanmew for egg-laying animals that don't care for their young.

But, he would certainly not do it because Rainflower is popular. Hailstar is a smart cat, in spite of how long he spent denying the problem and justifying it (sometimes intellect just makes you better at making excuses). He knows full well that something like that could backfire politically.

There's a portion of the Clan who thinks he was wrong to punish her at all, and more who are in that nebulous state of not being totally sure if his response was justified or not. He took her child and stripped her of all status. If he went further than that, it would look like retribution... which it would be, and in another, more furious Clan, would have appeased the angry mob.

But this Clan isn't furious. The reception is mixed. Hailstar's goal isn't to make a big point, it's to protect Stormkit the way he should have done a long time ago.

The best plan of action is the action that makes this transition go smoothly. Rainflower does not need to wear a name like Lampreypool right now, to draw attention to her, to have the whole Clan be looking at her while she plays the poor, besieged victim of a cruel and unusual leader. She needs to be kept out of power, and away from Shellheart's son as the poor child recovers.

(Also Mapleshade didn't die in the Battle of the True Eclipse! Not in BB and not in canon's The Great Battle either, lmao. She's still around, chilling in the Dark Forest, haunting Applekin.)