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#I gotta make the most of this energy
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smth smth about 'the thing that the character did that you thought was rly rly funny in the moment is actually linked to a terrible trauma that lies within said character.' or wahtever.
#jrwi show#jrwi fanart#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#made this within a short span of wahtever bc i gotta go up to the mountains for my stupid gay job tonight n im trying#nnot to frrRREAAAK THE FUCK OUUTTTTTTi dont wanna work but. get that bread we fuckin shall i guess#ONWARDS TO THE FISH TORMENT!! sometimes flowers feel pain when you trim them before their blossoming. atleast i imagine so#i used to draw gillion with loooong hair tied into a big ol braid. and then it was confirmed that he had short hair when he was little.#AT FIRST I WAS SAD. but then i realized the duality of. when they were little. gill had short hair. edyn had long hair.#AND NOW THEYRE OLDER. and gillion has long hair. and edyn has short hair#both mirroring eachother. looking up to eachother. subconsciously or not. they most certainly care. and most certainly miss eachother.#GILLION ALWAYS LOVED HOW LONG HAIR LOOKs. atleast i imagine so. he hasnt cut it since he left the undersea. sure he wanted to go back home#but even at the very start. he knew he was free in some way now. free to grow out his hair. an adventure would await him before he returns.#he knew it would be a while. so he cant let this go. he cant let this sought-after hair-length get cut away from him again#not yet. not yet. i like to think he loved music too. I SAW SOMETHING INTERESTING A BIT AGO#i see alot of ppl commenting on my baby gill comics like;'i wouldFIGHT this teacher i wanna KILL EM i want them DESTROYED#all very good and nice sentiments! i LOVE the energy here! and it would be nice. to have that catharsis#but the story of young tidestrider is not a story of catharsis. it is a story of agony and being so so small and so special and also so dum#and sucking so bad. and just being a kid and doing the things that a little kid does and so many tired tired people reacting badly to it#youre supposed to be the hero that will save us. our world hangs in the balance and you are the one who tips the scales.#YOU are supposed to SAVE US!! you NEED to SAVE US! CAN YOU PLEASE STOP SQUIRMING IN YOUR STUPID CHAIR!!#you'd think that young tidestrider ought to prevail. and be tucked someplace all safe and sound.#elders gone missing and rotting in a jail. their cultists nowhere around. but theres no happy endings. not here not now.#this tale is all sorrows n woes. you may dream that justice n peace win the day. but thats not how this story goes#BIG ideas for this lil baby gillion series. if anything i make ever gets disproven im killing myself in a well as to poison a water supply
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figofswords · 13 days
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the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something
#WHAT AM I DOING!!!!#i get up i go to my stupid retail job i stick labels on bags they pay me fucking thirteen bucks an hour i come home i lie on the couch#too tired to draw in too much pain to go anywhere no energy to reach out to college friends to do anything fun#no idea where the even start with getting an industry job no clue what i even WANT at this point#trying to remember what i loved so much about comics i want it BACK i HATE this#WHAT IS THE POINT!!!! WHAT DO I WANT WHERE AM I GOING!!! WHAT COMES NEXT!!!!!!#there's no clear career trajectory i can't do freelance i need structure i can't work too much i need free time#my brain doesn't work every job requires me to move across the country the irs just took fucking three hundred stupid dollars from me#my friends live in different states i can't get a job without experience i can't get experience without a job#i can't work on my portfolio with no energy and no time and i dont have any money and everything is so expensive all the time#i can't get anywhere bc i dont drive and im too stressed to think about taking driving lessons again#and WHAT DO I WANT!#THE MOST INTERESTING THING I DO EVERY WEEK IS GO TO PHYSICAL THERAPY!#I AM EXCITED EVERY WEEK FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!! WHY!!!!!!!!#anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed#delete later#i got into spx. today. so. had to have a crisis about how i felt when i attended spx (energized. excited. a part of something. ambitious)#versus how i feel now (tired. unmotivated. kind of apathetic about art. disconnected)#i dont miss the stress of school but i miss being around other artists. ppl who speak your language and who want the same things you want#ppl who are excited abut art and that makes YOU excited about art. ppl who get you#i miss that i want that back#whatever. its 1am i gotta go shower i have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow. wahoo. $13.50/hr lets go
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autistic-katara · 9 months
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me: dude im not even feeling that tired rn and haven’t for ages oh no oh fuck im probably accidentally faking my disability-
my chronic fatigue, loading ammunition into a massive fucking cannon: damn really bro?
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I think the twins had the potential to be the best borderlands antagonists if they were handled properly. Like if gearbox pulled more from reality it could have been a really interesting concept about parasocial relationships, the dangers of blurring the lines between online and reality, and how idolization can turn someone into a faux god
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thresholdbb · 29 days
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Yes, yes, coffee black, but what kind of coffee?
Arabica? Robusta?
Light? Medium? Dark roast?
Drip? Pour over? French press? Percolator?
Single origin? Blend?
Ethiopian? Brazilian? Colombian? Hawaiian? Kenyan? (Ad nauseam)
Paris Delight? Landras Blend? Paksor Blend? Firenut Blend? Even-better-than-coffee Substitute?
Fruity notes? Chocolate notes? Earthy notes? Warm notes? Bright notes?
Is it the ritual? The caffeine? The flavor? The comfort? The headache?
And why did she stop taking cream?
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Since we know she has coffee opinions...
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neverendingford · 1 month
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skyglow:
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(alternative title: photo dump of a midnight desert run)
#photography#Ford's Art#color says shit#it was either go on a twelve mile run or re-download grindr and get absolutely blasted so I went with the more responsible option.#b because damn I'm feeling it tonight. or at least I was before the run. I need to shower and then I'll cook dinner and go to bed satiated.#I did also jerk off under the bridge and then piss on someone's flowers on the way home. gotta get those animal instincts out somehow right?#anyway I've successfully vented most of my manic energy and a cold shower will finish it off and then we're good.#the mood meds have been helping a lot. last time I got hit with this kind of a mood I came out of it with huge bite marks and chlamydia.#and I haven't been feeling it nearly as bad this time so that's nice. more like a restless dog and less like a caged wolf thirsty for blood.#yes I'm making references to Call of the Wild again deal with it.#anyway sorry to anyone who sees this from the tags and not because you follow me. you didn't sign up for this lmao.#also. this is why I can't be a binary trans woman. this night photography shit is the most gay-man thing ever and I enjoy it.#I was doing it before my last boyfriend but he got me even more into it.#anyway bye I'm gonna go shower and then eat food. I've been hungrier more recently.#between the meds and the hrt my appetite is bigger and I'm gaining weight with the hrt fat redistribution which is cool and good.#I want to be a healthy weight and maybe even a lil chonky? we'll see we'll see.
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oh my god the 'zomboss caused child murder' thing is not a meme, he deadass killed like plant children, im in fucking tears rn ajhdjsdfhg
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osoreruna · 2 months
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the way toshinori interacts with your muse is highly dependent on YOUR muse's thoughts and feelings on him, but probably not in the way you think ? it's less of a "you give me attitude, you'll get attitude back" and more of a...respect, or boundary sort of thing. it's strange for him — especially after the kamino incident, after everyone's let in on his true form, because...well, everyone knows ALL MIGHT. while he knows nothing about you, almost everything about him is laid out on a table in front of the entire general public. everyone has thoughts, opinions, even complicated feelings about all might. he's done so much in his 40 years of serving the world, accomplished such a long list of things — touched the lives of so many people, in the biggest and smallest of ways and everything in between...he will never not be able to walk up to someone and assume that, before he even opens his mouth, that they've already got some form of opinion about him, even if it's someone he's never met a day in his life. and while most of the time said opinion is GOOD, sometimes...it's really, really bad. sometimes they just don't like the BIG personality, sometimes it's a political thing, sometimes...sometimes it's the one he just couldn't save...literally, figuratively...and when it's a situation like that, he knows there's nothing he can say or do to change it. he won't FORCE you to like him, won't even ask you to be nice to him... he knows such thoughts and feelings are going to predetermine their attitude towards him and all he can do is adjust accordingly.
#𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗧'𝗦 𝗪𝗛𝗘𝗡 𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗚𝗢𝗧𝗧𝗔 𝗦𝗠𝗜𝗟𝗘 + [ MUSINGS ]#whenever i start plotting with someone#even if it's a canon character#one of the first things i ask is their thoughts and feelings on ALL MIGHT.#because it really does determine how he's gonna react to YOUR character.#i feel like anyway...#because while the first thought is “well...who DOESN'T like all might ?” the second thought is#“there's gotta be people out there who dislike him...even DESPISE him.” and it's not just villains...#his goal wasn't to become the world's most POPULAR hero...#he isn't aiming for the entire population to *like* him. so he's not going to put his energy into trying to change that for your character.#he's just gonna respect it and move on.#now#those he's TRULY FAILED ??#those he tried to save#those he COULD HAVE saved but didn't ?#because of a mistake he's made or something completely out of his control — doesn't matter...#but THOSE PEOPLE ??? he still won't actively try to change their opinion of him.#but he does feel as though he owes them *something*...and will always go out of his way to make up for it.#even if it's just for his own sake...mentally y'know —#but anyway i just thought it was interesting because i've never played a character before where —#instead of it being two complete strangers meeting and getting to know each other and so on#in this case...98% of the time the other character already knows mine. already has detailed thoughts and opinions on him.#and knows how they're going to interact / respond to him.#even though he has NO CLUE who *your* character is.#and it's WEIRD LMAO
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im-a-goat-in-disguise · 2 months
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Images of despair [stellaris version]
#when you're fighting the scourge and making 700+ alloys a month but you NEED MORE#genuinely so glad I invested into a dyson sphere early on to suck the market 100% dry of alloys#pumping out ships because my life depends on it#just imagine. you're a space trader and you heard there's some invasion of bugs somewhere in the galaxy#then the strongest military you've ever seen rolls up and offers you 'any price you name' for spare metal on your ship#you laugh and say '600 energy credits and I'll give you four metal pipes!'#the military says 'deal' and immediately deposits 900 energy credits [the market price of alloys is already increasing]#anyway I'm now sitting here with a military over five times larger than my naval cap#and over four times the population I had before the war#reason: people evacuated the planets the scourge bombed#thousands of pops have settled straight into my empire even in the most dire planets#every square inch of living space is now taken up and every single job is full#every single planet has unemployment [i have an overabundance of consumer goods so I'm just giving them all free stuff]#oh and since I'm gearing the economy now towards 'well. they gotta work SOMEWHERE' [building as many commercial districts as possible]#I am spending hundreds of special resources I do not produce to keep massive company complexes running#imagine this: strange otherworldly beasts are running down your homeworld#you escape into space in a small cargo ship stuffed with people#it's barely enough to be considered a transport but it gets you far enough away to feel safe#as you are running you see the largest collection of ships in your life warp into the system#they unleash hellfire on the aliens and then neuron sweep the planet [the very ground of which got infected]#you shed a tear and look away from the window#three days later you're told you've arrived#you touch down in an extremely busy landing area#there are hundreds of thousands of people everywhere. the mood is joyous#there are screens set up in the square broadcasting the eradication of the aliens#you see people in the crowd you've never seen before. people speak in tongues you've never heard#a guide calls over to you and all the other new arrivals#apparently you weren't the first to run. you won't be the last either#this planet has more than quintoupled its population and is still recieving many people every day#luckily the government has declared they are going to be constructing massive projects to introduce new jobs
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bmpmp3 · 8 days
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dysgraphic artiƨts risɘ UP!!!!!
#raise your pencils!!!! and erasers. to fix the backwards letters 😔#sorry still thinking about my weirdness with my art professors. yknow a lot of em have been really pushing us as#students to make our personal identities a major part of like our 'brand' as artists#which. well from an art history major perspective thats a very contentious and nuanced topic. i love a lot of artists who live this way#and i think its great seeing my peers who focus on identity thrive. but also as an fine arts major (double major fool LOL)#i keep getting pushed by teachers into like. specific '____ artist' identities???#specificaly woman artist. which is a little bizarre because im a bit fat and a bit gnc so im generally like. ungendered? in day-to-day life#(which doesnt actually matter to me directly that much honestly LOL people tend to view me as like. buddy? buddy or pal.)#(not man. not woman. not anything human. sometimes i remind people of a beloved dog. which. hkdsahjk thats its own can of worms)#(a can of worms that also doesnt matter much to me directly because im a wannabe furry who chose to be the dog when playing house as a kid)#(LOL so um. well. theres that) but yeah i dunno i dont really consider myself a woman artist. its been. shockingly (and sometimes luckily?)#irrelevant to most of my life and experiences and art (although dont get me wrong misogyny is very real and very present) so i dont#have a whole lot to say about it from an art perspective. you could also call me all kinds of things. a queer artist. a mixed race artist#again technically correct. some aspects more visible in my work than others. but also very technical. i focus on race a lot in in my#art historical work but i dunno how much my drawings have to say. except that i keep making too many mixed ocs LOL#i dunno i just think my professors gotta focus that energy away from tokenizing me and over to supporting like actual#capital W Woman artists capital Q Queer artists capital A Artists of Colour who are doing far more interesting things than I#far more thought out and engaged in these topics directly. i just kind of stumble into my art blindly and confused <3#sorry that was a long tangent WHAT IM SAYING Is despite all that: i do consider myself a capital D Dysgraphic artist#i think its an unmovable constant of my art and the way i draw and the way my hands move. the untrained eye doesnt seem to be as aware#of it directly. but those who are familiar can probably see it. the dysgraphia LOL if not just from whenever i write a letter or number#half of them are busted and frantically fixed HDKJSDJDS but its in all my art. if u can see it <3 ive been trying to embrace it#dygraphic artists raise your pencils indeed!! and throw away the eraser!!! make the legibility of your words everyone elses problem!!!#what does that say? what is that sketch? none of my business! none of your business!! its the business of my hand and the pencil alone#motor skill and spatial issues take the wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel
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toxooz · 1 year
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maybe im projecting but i feel like Ollie would have a FUCKING HUGE monstera plant in his house thats taking over his living room
#ollie#anytime someone asks about it hes just ''good camouflage for me :]''#in fact i feel like he would have a shit load of plants from his home continent that his mom keeps sending him#but again maybe im projecting AHA#like yeah he can forge weapons of war with his eyes closed and can maul a grown man to death but dammit that man knows his PLANTS#anyway i got a monstera over the winter bc ive wanted one for the longest time but i was sO scared of killing it#bc its higher maintenance than succulents and snake plants all that#and brother i aint got the remembrance or energy or executive function to be taknig care of high maintenance plants but luckily#my obsession has taken over and im doin pretty good keeping up with watering and i plan on getting it better soil for fertilization#it seems to be doing well and is even growing 3 new leaves AAOOOOO#one of the juvenile leaves even grew a lil hole in it and im :')#but i still gotta properly repot it and actually put poles in it to climb bc theyre kinda half ass put in there#but sPRING IS COMING i am ready#also have a monster adinsoniiiiiiihowever tf u spell it but same applies#i feel like just having 1 (or 2 kindof) that are high maintenance is goin good bc i can focus most of my energy on that like a pet PFFT#bc unfortunately i fear that if i had a shit load of high maintenance plants i would get overwhelmed and involuntarily make them all die#which SUCKS bc i want my house to be infested with so many plants sOOO BAD ugh maybe one day i wont be mentally ill lmfao 💗#ANYWAY more pon ti comin soon
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autistic-katara · 5 months
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heartbreaking: beloved mutual reblogs obvious propaganda and dogwhistles but ur too emotionally attacked to block them
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filthyjanuary · 13 days
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i'm so sick of my fellow iranians being cringe as fuck on social media and simping for the state of israel out of some insane the enemy of my enemy is my friend mentality like i know this is crazy but you can hate the iranian government without deciding to go full monarchist and act like israelis are liberators of literally anything or anyone
like i'm sorry if the best you can envision for iran is trading one authoritarian for the son of the previous authoritarian (who was literally overthrown bc he was an authoritarian puppet of the united states) solely bc of his name then you hate the iranian people more than i can image
#like why are they somehow hitting the same level of insane cringe as indian nationalists#also stop parroting these dumbass slogans that don't make any sense like iran isnt islamic republic like ok what does that even mean#it makes as much sense as hamas is isis#yall are just saying words that you think sound catchy but are ultimately meaningless#like yeah iran hasnt been an islamic republic for most of its existence#it currently is#that has clearly not worked out and it can and should change but like that's literally factually what it is rn#and it's dumb as shit to act like there ARENT people that do support it#you are never going to gain ground if you accuse literally everyone of being a paid state actor who disagrees with you#or if you see the world in so black and white that you think bc the iranian government is bad israel's government is good#or act like the actual revolution in 1979 WASNT born out of legit grievances#like obviously that went incredibly sideways but like#what is with this insane whitewashing of the shah all of you are so embarassing#sorry i cant rant on twitter bc of the Job so i gotta do it here i am so fucking tireddddddd#i wish the most outspoken public facing iranians weren't all wealthy as fuck monarchists playing activists#while sitting in beverly hills mansions contemplating their next nose jobs and doing absolutely nothing of use like wow you are so brave#it's the same energy as those rich cubans who moved to miami after castro took over#you can argue that the motive for the iranian regime's defiance of israel is not ultimately out of any desire to help palestinians#and frankly i would agree with you#but like in this specific instance i don't actually think their motive matters if it is materially helping palestinians#will it? that remains to be seen#and acknowledging that it could does not suddenly mean you support the regime all of you are so braindead i am tiiiiiired
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blk-xniverse · 6 months
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This year's just... yearing.
#So tired of folks thinking they can play in my face + continue to be disrespectful with little to no consequences in return#I am NOT the same girl I used to be#I'm not just gon sit on my hands + take it AND that infuriates them SO bad#cause it's like... 'who do you think you are??? you think you allowed to take up for yourself??? defend yourself?? set BOUNDARIES???'#and that shit blows bc then they feel like they can challenge me to see if I'll fold or not which is even more disrespectful on top of the -#- shit that was already going on in the first place#like if I gotta go through AAAALLL that for a weak ass connection then I gladly let it go but don't let me say that -#- bc then it's an even BIGGER showdown bc I be letting em know that if they gon keep disrespecting me + my folks then they need to get tf on#very simple terms imo but mfs want to fight + be passive-aggressive all day like.... ain't nobody got the time nor the energy for allat fr#and as soon as me and my sisters stand our ground we magically become the villains and the bad guys#and this shit is spread to whoever is willing to listen and this shit irks so bad sometimes ngl bc idfw ppl lying on our characters#this year has completely SUCKED in terms of my connections with ppl and that makes me real life not want to talk to anybody ever again bc#ppl always pretending to be something they not to get what they want out of us#+ as soon as we fall short/make a mistake/unable to do a thing then the mask falls off + they become the most disgusting person ever!!!!!#and it's like... who tf is this person???? this aint who i befriended???? hello?????#and the lamest part about all of that is that we are always 1000% ourselves so we automatically expect folks to do the same with us#and maybe that's our fault for thinking like that idk but at the end of the day the shit is wack#and I just plan on being in hermit mode for as long as time permits + until i get a sign/message to do something else#if anybody read all of this: thanks for reading + sending you so so so much love + kindness into your life! We for sure all need it 🫶🏾✨️✨️#abtme#4:26 pm
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you’ll always be my favorite ghost - Big God, by Florence + The Machine
[Image description: Lineless digital painting of Ford kneeling in front of the stone statue of Bill, hugging it and crying. He is in the woods, surrounded by birch trees, with beams yellow light streaming down from the treetops. The grass around Ford is shaded to be reminiscent of the shape of the portal.]
#original art#billford#god I havent drawn in ages let alone lineless art#i dont know how to draw tears or anatomy at All#I looked up 'man hugging dog' to find a good hugging-while-kneeling reference image.#sometimes you gotta say fuck it and draw the thing before the idea of it eats you alive#i'm writing a fic about ford confronting the statue. the feelings are just so Complicated#he is so angry and relieved and exhausted.#angry at everything bill did. angry that hes gone forever. angry at himself for spending any energy on thinking about bill#most of all angry at himself for missing bill. he doesnt even Miss Bill#he just misses the version of bill that he thought he knew pre-betrayal. but that doesnt make the complicated feelings any less real#i imagine he would avoid the statue for a long long time and then one day accidentally walk past it#and feel a ton of repressed feelings bubbling to the surface#and he would want to kick the statue or run away or yell at it but all of those feel so silly to do to a statue. basically a gravestone#so he ends up hugging it and feeling like an idiot for hugging it but he just has to sob for a little while#sometimes you gotta cling to the tombstone of your horrible toxic ex and sob about how much you miss them#and sob about how bitter and angry and lost and Tired you feel. there will Never be any Resolution. he's just. Gone Forever#i can picture him laughing through the sobs and muttering 'we'll meet again huh. as if.'#'i never want to see you again you asshole. and having the chance to meet again would be too good to be true.'#he's just So Heartbroken about it all. and he wishes he could get some kind of closure or something. but there IS none.#even if bill came back what would he say? nothing new. He would keep feeling no remorse about any of it. he would keep being horrible.#ford is kinda mourning the final tiny little irrational ray of hope in him that got crushed when bill died.#the irrational hope that maybe bill Could end up regretting what he did and become better and then he could have his best friend back.#the irrational hope that the betrayal was all just a bad dream and any second now he will wake up and bill will be benevolent and good#none of these feelings are things that ford can admit to himself. not even all these decades later.#but it Does Something To You to see your ex-closest-friend's tombstone!!#regardless of how deep and terrible the betrayal was.#ford so badly wishes he could stop having any kind of feelings about bill anymore. especially the lingering remains of fond feelings#but i dont know if those feelings even Can be completely gotten rid of. hes stuck with the knowledge that he feels upset about bills death.#and he hates it. he hates feeling upset about the death of an evil dream demon who tried to destroy his family and his dimension.
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ballisterboldheart · 2 years
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