#anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed
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figofswords · 1 year ago
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the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something
#WHAT AM I DOING!!!!#i get up i go to my stupid retail job i stick labels on bags they pay me fucking thirteen bucks an hour i come home i lie on the couch#too tired to draw in too much pain to go anywhere no energy to reach out to college friends to do anything fun#no idea where the even start with getting an industry job no clue what i even WANT at this point#trying to remember what i loved so much about comics i want it BACK i HATE this#WHAT IS THE POINT!!!! WHAT DO I WANT WHERE AM I GOING!!! WHAT COMES NEXT!!!!!!#there's no clear career trajectory i can't do freelance i need structure i can't work too much i need free time#my brain doesn't work every job requires me to move across the country the irs just took fucking three hundred stupid dollars from me#my friends live in different states i can't get a job without experience i can't get experience without a job#i can't work on my portfolio with no energy and no time and i dont have any money and everything is so expensive all the time#i can't get anywhere bc i dont drive and im too stressed to think about taking driving lessons again#and WHAT DO I WANT!#THE MOST INTERESTING THING I DO EVERY WEEK IS GO TO PHYSICAL THERAPY!#I AM EXCITED EVERY WEEK FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!! WHY!!!!!!!!#anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed#delete later#i got into spx. today. so. had to have a crisis about how i felt when i attended spx (energized. excited. a part of something. ambitious)#versus how i feel now (tired. unmotivated. kind of apathetic about art. disconnected)#i dont miss the stress of school but i miss being around other artists. ppl who speak your language and who want the same things you want#ppl who are excited abut art and that makes YOU excited about art. ppl who get you#i miss that i want that back#whatever. its 1am i gotta go shower i have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow. wahoo. $13.50/hr lets go
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dreamyblanket · 3 months ago
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GC n Pink Peppercorn!Y/N give much rival vibes in how they go about their greed
Lol what if they kiss-/j
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Pink peppercorn the kinda person to pretend to like gc for her spear then actually fall in love later tbh.
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riverin-stories · 3 months ago
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* shows up late to ISAT function * how do you do, fellow saviors
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xxplastic-cubexx · 4 months ago
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charlies turn for the reference sheet beam
#xmen#xmen comics#xmen tas#charles xavier#professor x#snap sketches#i feel weird posting a charles ref cause ive done so many 'ref sheets' for headshots.. i need to stop making doodle pages for him apparentl#this started out because i wanted to practice charles' body type and then i figured id just. ref sheet vjaelkjvae#if i were bold id just post him in just briefs and paper doll it if you catch my cold. he got a lot of outfits i like...#i wanted to make refs for the og5 actually so maybe i will just do these ref sheets throughout the week before bed#the funny thing about this ref sheet is this is prob the only time ever actually going to draw charles' whole back... lmao...#i mean never say never so Very Rarely will i draw his whole back. and standing ajerlkvjalkj#idk ref sheets are just fun and easy and relaxing for me to do .... and brother i wanna relax gjERLKJAEL#i have my mandatory sketches lined up to finish this week so i earned a lil doodlin i think !!!!!!#i usually dont work on weekends but.. its a lot so jvLRKVJARLKJV BUT ANYWAY#observe. god its so illegal having him stand i promise ill never do it again unless i like have to for some rare reason vjEALVJAE#i had a savage lands arc idea but who knows if ill go through with it#i debated adding that lil ring from that scrapped tas design but i dont think ima make that a consistent thing#prob use it for like. one or two jokes or whatever other temporary purposes...#was i going to say anything else. OH YEAH i wanted to see what charles looked like wtih brown eyes...#i was stalking my tags and i was reminded he had brown eyes sometimes and as your resident brown eyed bestie i wanted To See..#i fear i do like giving him contacts...... but his blue eyes arent bad either so now im in a predicament !!!!!#we'll see what happens ill probably stick with blue just for popularity sake but who knows#anyway !!! i am very weary and i am very busy this week so good night !!!!!!
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capn-twitchery · 8 months ago
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songs to sink ships to (who gave them an ipod, anyway)
i mentioned the very silly "what if you gave twitch modern music" playlist, here it is (so far), it's a mess<3
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lizardsmp3 · 5 months ago
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if cake scene had survived into the tatinof recording people wouldn’t be saying they can’t imagine tatinof era dnp fucking #flyhighcakescene </3
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sluckythewizard · 10 months ago
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'I wont cry for you, I wont crucify the things you do. I wont cry for you, see, when you're gone, I'll still be BLOODY MARY'
#cw blood#SUUUPER SCUFFED LIL WIP THATS BEEN RRRROTTING IN MY FOLDER. OUT!! GET OUT!!!#its almos 2 am and imm gettin high as hrothgar. spruced this up within an hour so i could be shared n eaten#its SUPPOsed to be part ofa bigger doodly page so ofc theres the chance this changes between now n then#fuuuuck shoulda made her dress sparkly. fuckit ill fix it laterrrrr. i havnt posted art in YWEARRS i needed to post something#also i uh. well you see i started losing followers on twitter bc im sooo inactive and i KNOW that shouldnt matter like it should be whateve#but. you see. i lkike when number go up and when it go down i get MMMADDD.we all get our dopamine from somewhere#ANYWAY so i actually havnt touched the suckening in so long. been workin on oc stuff.BUT WELL. ARTHUR AND MARY. STILL MAKE ME WEEP#THEYRE SO CUTE N TRAGIC...whadda fuck is it with grizzly n charlie characters being so in love and so doomed#kian and becky then arthur and his various exes like CMAHn.stop doing this to me#from what i remember of the episode.she seemed so.tired.disconnected.like she had been wandering a dream#and yet she seemed so positive.reasonably concerned and yet.content.she warmed up to arthur as soon as she recognized him#she speaks so gently and so sweetly and she keeps the conversation so light.even though shes dead and shes gone and she#is doomed to wander an odd limbo for the rest of time.and yet she seemed so at peace.i can see why arthur liked her.what happened?#what caused them to separate?arthur seems so jaded and so tired.marys company seems like such a gentle place to rest.#how did he squander such a blessing?was it a blessing?OHH what i would give to crack open their minds and peer inside.#yknow wat im runnign out of room i think so ill add a last thought here at the bottom of my tags. I AM MORE CORRECT ABT ARHTURS UGLY LOOK#I WANT THAT MAN TO BE BEASTLY AND GROSS AND STRANGE AND SCARY AND EEWWW I SEE THINGS SQUIRMING IN THE DARK.ther are bugs#LETTING HIM HAVE HOT HOT ABBS AND STUFF WAS A COP OUUTTTT LET HIS WHOLE FORM BE DISTORTED OR UR NOT A FUCKING 0 APPEARANCE BITCH#THE BONES SHIFTED BENEATH AS IF TRYING TO HATCH. MANY OTHER THINGS HATCHED ASWELL. THE DEAD IMMORTAL FLESH SOURED#TOO GRAND TO ROT BUT TOO CORRUPTED TO KEEP CLASSIC FORM. MMMONSTER MONSTER MONSTER MONSTER#oka y im not going to bed but im gonna go. uh. do miore drugs or something. maybe ill work on more jrwi stuff. or oc stuff.#i hope ur day goes swimmingly thankyou for reading my tags i love you so so so so so much
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dazzoot · 8 months ago
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Subspace Debonair Disguise (bottom left character ofc)!! Silly oc of mine ^_^
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A crossroads-originating, self-pronounced 'detective' who uses his gear to impersonate others to get into places he otherwise wouldn't be able to properly investigate on his own!
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cerealmonster15 · 5 months ago
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[prev]
Looks like Idia found the courage to come COMPLAIN at Jade for taking over last poll.
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Jade is following protocol, of course 😌
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I think Idia forgot about the mistletoe part, and got a little caught off guard 🫢
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sforzesco · 11 months ago
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Historia Augusta, Geta
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Cassius Dio, 78.1
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Cassius Dio, 78.4
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Mutiliation and Transformation: Damnatio Memoriae and the Roman Imperial Portraiture, Eric R. Varner
this is. well! it's probably fine.
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deoidesign · 1 year ago
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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perilegs · 2 months ago
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i think it's unfair that anxiety can cause an upset stomach. why are you doing all that.
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coconi · 1 month ago
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A-Z Drabble Practice #17
"Quadrant D clear."
Omega's ocular receptors dim, finishing their nightly perimeter scan. Team Dark's quarters return to darkness.
Voice modulator: off. Proceed with final step.
Moving as quietly as his metallic body will allow, Omega trudges towards the two closed doors on the other side of the apartment. He lingers by each in turn, allowing his sensors to delve and scan past them. Two sets of vitals. Stable. Within normal sleep parameters.
Satisfied, Omega enters his room and slumps against the wall amidst his few possessions: spare ammunition, polish, crane game plushes, a singed photograph…
Mission complete. Initiating scheduled stasis.
(Previous)
#a-z drabble practice#sonic the hedgehog#e-123 omega#team dark#hi hello sega can pry team dark as friends and (potential) roommates from my cold dead hands ☺️✌️#🤖 rambling incoming:#this is not necessarily a strong hc of mine but i like to think omega scans his immediate surroundings for threats before he shuts down#(whenever he has to/chooses to shut down anyway)#and that over time he gets into the habit of checking on both shadow and rouge every night after they go to bed#especially after missions when at least one of them is injured#or when shadow's been having nightmares/struggling with insomnia. or when rouge stumbles home late after a heist.#as for his room/possessions: obviously he doesn't have a bed because he doesn't need it... nor do i think he cares for furniture much#but i imagine the others insisted on him having his own room for him to keep his spare parts. oil. polish. tools and such#plus whatever rouge put in there to make the place more lively#at first it was probably just that but after the first time team dark went to an arcade together for shits and giggles#they discovered that omega not only has a (predictable) knack for shooter games... but also for crane games#it becomes a competition between the three of them but omega has them beat and he's quite proud of it#hence the little mountain of trophies#the singed photograph is also from the arcade. from one of those photo booths with the cheesy effects#rouge roped him and shadow into it for them to have a little souvenir <3 they all have a copy#(omega barely managed to fit his head in there but they made it work)#okay i'm done now lol#my writing#next up: 🐦
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transryanguzman · 3 months ago
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this might be wanky or whatever so i guess read at your own risk
i just honestly don't know like if they're not doing something specific with buddie i guess i just do not know where they're going here what's the point of all of [hand gestures wildly] that if it's just look at these besties being besties who are just besties and there's nothing to see here because it all feels so deliberate and specific there's tension and there's awkwardness and there's glances and looks and specific tropes and i cannot see it being unintentional at this point, so i get it if, like, you don't personally ship buddie or want to see it happen, but i am not a dumb person.
i have studied creative writing and film (albeit years ago, i can admit - but none the less, i am someone who has studied these things) and spent 25+ years honing a craft which some of you may find silly since i don't get paid for it but there are specific themes and genre standards of romance and slow build relationships and buddie hits *so* many of them. yeah there is always something to be said for platonic friends who share deep deep bonds but at the same time, there are also beats that most shows and movies explicitly and standardly use to show that two people are romantically interested in each other.
and again, if you don't see it that way, i am not here to say anything negative about you. i think that's fine. people are interested in different dynamics. people find different types of stories interesting. not everyone here is looking for the same thing or wants to see the same story. you don't have to ship it.
but idk. i think i just get tired of having to read things that essentially boil down to:
'you like buddie? you interpret these things in a way that at at least could be intentional? you ship buddie? aw that's so cute bless ur heart ur just kind of dumb and don't understand different types of love or anything about media at all do you?'
anyway.
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callixton · 2 months ago
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okay. just got triggered by a pitt fanfic in a way i didn't know was still possible. fuck
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tetzoro · 1 year ago
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i hate packing soooooo so much
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