#I guess it's a wake up call to take better care of myself but I'm so terrible at it

[tyuns-world]

⋆ ༘ Forbidden ⋆ ༘

Pairing: fem!reader x choi soobin x choi yeonjun

Genre: smut

Warnings: 18+ (mdni), threesome, stepcest

Summary: The tension between you and Yeonjun reaches a boiling point when he competes with your soon-to-be stepbrother, Soobin, for your attention at a party.

Wc: 2k

You knew what you were doing was utterly wrong. You knew he could hear you through the thin walls of your family's vacation home, but you didn't care. You needed to get off, and the thought of your brother's best friend, Yeonjun, hearing just made it all the more thrilling.

You even drew out some of your moans so he could hear better if he was listening in. Of course, he was. Yeonjun was on the other side of the wall, getting hard and riled up at your sounds. He cursed himself for even thinking about touching himself to this. You probably thought he was asleep, and it would be wicked to indulge in the lovely voice of his best friend's younger step-sister.

He was oblivious to your cunning plan. But after you moaned "Yeonjun," he couldn't take it anymore. He stripped himself of his boxers, his hand immediately gripping his leaking cock and stroking it. God, he could only imagine the dirty things you were doing to yourself, imagining it was him.

The morning after your lewd actions, you found yourself in the kitchen, making breakfast. It was just your step brother, his best friend, and yourself at the family vacation home, so it was practically every man for himself. Despite only the three of you staying there, the boys often threw wild parties during your stay, so you guys were never really alone with each other.

The second person to wake up and shuffle into the kitchen was none other than Yeonjun. A flush of embarrassment crept over you as you remembered your bold actions from last night. You silently prayed he had been asleep. "Morning," he said casually, and you hummed in response, trying to maintain a cool appearance.

"I think this place is haunted. I kept hearing moaning last night," Yeonjun teased as he casually raided the fridge for orange juice. Your eyes widened, and you tried to remain composed. Yeonjun was always teasing you, so you tried to convince yourself it was just his usual antics. "Ah, guess we should call the Ghostbusters," you retorted. It was a silly remark but the best you could come up with at the moment.

Yeonjun sauntered over to you, trapping you by placing his hands on either side of the counter. "I think I can deal with the ghost myself. I have something it needs," he murmured in a low, seductive voice, pressing his morning wood against your ass. He smoothly backed away just as your step brother entered the room, loudly yawning.

As you ate breakfast in silence, eyes scanning your respective phones, your step brother broke the quiet. "Oh right. That cute girl Yujin we met on the beach? Yeah, she's coming over with some of her friends, and we're gonna have a little get-together tonight." You huffed a bit, knowing that by "get-together," your step brother meant a rager.

As much as you loved parties, your step brother's were always loud and reckless. "Sweet," Yeonjun said, high-fiving your step brother. You rolled your eyes, and the action caught Yeonjun's attention. "You know, you can always stay in your room if you want," he suggested.

You scoffed at the idea—how could you possibly relax in your room with loud music and even louder people? "Yeah, well, how about I call the cops when I'm ready to enjoy my bed?" you threatened. "Binnie, your sister is being mean," Yeonjun pouted playfully, throwing his arms around soobin and acting hurt.

"Be nice to my friends, Y/N," your step brother Soobin played along. In reality, you and Soobin were practically strangers. Your mother had recently started dating his dad, and you'd only known your step brother for about a year.

This trip was supposed to be a bonding experience your parents had set up, but it felt more like they were tired of having two college kids disagree all the time and had kicked you out so they could honeymoon.

Your soon to be step brother didn't want to waste the trip, so of course, he brought his hot friend, Yeonjun, whom you'd been crushing on for ages. You all attended the same college, but you and Yeonjun were both music majors, so you saw him more often, which led to your hallway crush. You saw Soobin around sometimes when he was with Yeonjun. You even thought he was cute with his bunny like smile, but you disregarded that once your parents started dating.

The party was as loud as you thought it would be—get-together, your ass. You were a few drinks in, wearing a mini pink slip dress with a sweetheart neckline and lace trimming on the top and bottom. It was very flattering against your brown skin tone, and a lot of guys seemed to think so, as you kept getting hit on. Soobin, playing the overprotective brother, shooed them off with a stern "That's my stepsister."

You were a bit grateful for his protective act; the only guy you wished would flirt with you was Yeonjun, who was busy trying to charm a pretty girl across the room. You sighed at the sight and headed to the kitchen to refill your drink.

Your refill was interrupted when someone cleared their throat behind you. "You know I can't scare them all off if you wear clothing like that," Soobin remarked, gesturing toward your outfit. You rolled your eyes. "It's a cute dress, and I'm not asking you to do this," you replied. Soobin was obviously tipsy, leaning against the fridge for balance.

"You know, I thought you were cute when I used to see you around the halls," he admitted. You froze. "Me and Yeonjun had a bet... ah, I actually shouldn't talk about it," Soobin said, taking another swig from his drink. Your curiosity piqued. "So, you guys made a bet?" you asked, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

"Well, we bet on who'd get you first. Guess I lost, huh," he said, raising an eyebrow and smirking. You found the action unexpectedly attractive and quickly dismissed the thought. Soobin was admittedly attractive; he looked like a lead in a romance drama. But he was about to be your stepbrother, and that bridge was burning.

You two gazed intensely at each other, the air thick with unspoken tension, until a voice broke the spell. "Hope I'm not interrupting," Yeonjun said from the doorway. "Soobin was just telling me about a bet you guys had," you replied playfully, turning your attention to him. "Oh, I thought that was dropped since I'm obviously winning," Yeonjun said, grabbing your waist, pulling you in front of him, and resting his chin on your shoulder.

The sudden closeness made your heart race. Soobin pushed himself off the fridge and walked over to the two of you. "Who decided that?" he challenged, his competitive nature flaring up. Yeonjun had clearly riled him. You stood there, flustered by the situation. 

"How about we decide that right now?" Yeonjun murmured, holding you tighter and placing kisses along the side of your neck. You tilted your head slightly, giving him more access. "See? She wants me. She even moaned my name all last night," Yeonjun said cockily.

You were melting, powerless against his touch. You'd wanted this for so long, and you didn't want him to stop. Soobin stepped in front of you, trailing a finger up your thigh and under your dress. You let out a deeper moan when he made contact with your inner thigh.

"Well, you couldn't make her sound like that," Soobin taunted, egging Yeonjun on. You knew this was wrong—not only were you being touched provocatively by two guys in the kitchen where anyone could walk in, but one of those guys was your almost-stepbrother.

"Guys, we shouldn't do this out in the open," you warned as Yeonjun went from kisses to biting and sucking on your neck, while Soobin's hand trailed dangerously close to your panties. "Are you getting embarrassed now?" Yeonjun whispered in your ear, causing you to shudder with pleasure.

Soobin, not liking your attention being drawn away from him, traced circles on your already wet panties. You arched into Yeonjun at the sensation. The loud chants of "chug, chug, chug" from the party brought you all back to reality. "Maybe we should move this elsewhere," Soobin suggested, removing his hand.

Yeonjun quickly glanced around, making sure no one was watching before he took your hand and led you towards your room, with Soobin following closely behind. As you entered, Soobin clicked the door locked behind him. The noise from the party became a distant hum, your focus now entirely on the two boys.

"So, how about I have fun with Y/N here and you guard the door?" Yeonjun suggested to Soobin, pulling you into a kiss. Soobin scoffed at the suggestion, walking up to the two of you and positioning himself behind you, rubbing his erection against you. You moaned into Yeonjun's mouth, pressing your ass further against Soobin.

Yeonjun's hands roamed over your body, sliding down to the hem of your dress and lifting it slightly, turning the kiss more desperate and passionate. Soobin's hands traced the contours of your waist, moving up to cup your breasts through the fabric of your dress. His touch was warm, leaving you wanting more.

"You're so sexy," Yeonjun murmured against your lips, his voice laced with desire. He nibbled on your lower lip before trailing kisses along your jawline.

"He's not the only one who thinks so," Soobin whispered in your ear. His hot breath against your skin made you whimper.

You had never experienced such intense pleasure before, and it made your head spin. Soobin's hands continued their exploration, one sliding over your dress to caress your breast, gently squeezing and teasing your nipple through the fabric. A loud moan escaped your lips. You found yourself tracing the contours of Yeonjun's chest, feeling the muscles beneath his shirt.

"Let's take this to the bed," Soobin suggested, his voice low and filled with anticipation. Yeonjun nodded, breaking the kiss to lead you towards the bed. Soobin followed, his hands never leaving your body. Yeonjun quickly lost his shirt and unzipped his pants, the intensity of his gaze sending shivers down your spine.

"Looks like I go first," Yeonjun said playfully, laying there half-naked. "I don't think so," Soobin replied, still standing over the bed with you in front of him. He slid his hand up your thigh and into your panties, pushing them to the side as his fingers entered you.

The wet, intimate sound of your arousal, a soft squelch, filled the room as he did so.

Yeonjun chuckled but relished in the sight of your face twisted with pleasure. He crawled over to the edge of the bed where you were being fingered and dropped the straps of your dress, revealing your breasts. He began teasing them with his tongue. Your moans grew louder, and your pussy became wetter as you were overcome with the sensations.

Soobin started sucking on your neck, determined to leave more marks than Yeonjun. You couldn't handle all the pleasure and came all over Soobin's fingers with a loud moan.

"Aw, naughty girl," Soobin taunted. "You've ruined poor Binnie's fingers; they're all soaked," Yeonjun continued, gently parting your lips as Soobin put his fingers inside. "Suck," they commanded in unison. It was hot, and you obeyed, sucking Soobin's fingers clean of your slick.

"That's a good girl," Soobin cooed. Yeonjun moved out of the way as Soobin bent you over the bed, flipping the bottom of your dress up. His hard-on was very evident as he pressed it against your now-exposed ass. "Tsk tsk, don't get greedy now, Binnie. She already graced you with her cum all over your fingers," Yeonjun said. Soobin raised his hands in defeat and moved from behind you, letting Yeonjun take his spot. Yeonjun shoved your panties down and pushed his thick cock inside you. 

Your arms almost buckled under you from how big he was. Yeonjun started fucking into you slowly at first, but with your repeated moans, he couldn't contain himself and began slamming messily into you.

Your moans grew louder, and your arms gave out, but Yeonjun held you up, keeping his pace. "Yeonjun, I can't take it. It's too big," you whimpered, the pace and his cock leaving your body weak.

"You can take it." he reassured you in your ear. You glanced over to Soobin, who was positioned across from you two, jerking himself off at the sight of you. Eyes half-open, fully naked, his red needy cock was in full view.

You mustered the strength to rely on your arms again, sitting up a bit. You made a come-here motion to Soobin, and he obliged. You opened your mouth to suck him off, but he was already two steps ahead and grabbed your hair, shoving his cock in your mouth. Soobin did all the work, rolling and thrusting his dick into your mouth. 

As Soobin thrust into your mouth, you felt a surge of arousal coursing through you.

The sensation of being filled from both ends sent waves of pleasure through your body. Yeonjun's relentless pounding combined with Soobin's forceful thrusting left you in a blissful daze. 

Your moans became muffled around Soobin's cock, the sound vibrating against him, driving him wild. He gripped your hair tighter, urging you to take him deeper.

Meanwhile, Yeonjun maintained his unforgiving pace, his grip on your hips firm as he drove himself deeper into you. As your body was on the edge of climaxing once again, you felt Soobin's cock twitching in your mouth, a sign that he was close.

Sensing his impending release, you redoubled your efforts, sucking him eagerly, wanting to taste his cum. 

With a loud moan, Soobin reached his peak, his hot seed spilling into your mouth. You swallowed, savoring the taste of him as he rode out his orgasm. Yeonjun was close to his own climax; his pace grew sloppier, more needy with each thrust. With a final, powerful thrust, he was sent over the edge, pulling out to spill all over your back. His cries of pleasure mingled with Soobin's sounds of release.

Soobin gently pulled himself out of your mouth, collapsing onto the bed, his body glistening with sweat. Yeonjun planted a tender kiss on your neck before withdrawing.

"I think she said my name more times than you," Soobin teased, As Yeonjun wiped you clean with his own shirt. "No way in hell she enjoyed taking my dick much more than sucking yours," Yeonjun retorted, patting your ass as he finished and pulled your dress down.

"Is that so? She sure seemed happy enough to swallow my whole load," Soobin retorted, causing Yeonjun to scoff. He quickly redressed himself and threw Soobin's clothes at him. "We've deprived the party of its best guest long enough." 

You grabbed a fresh pair of panties from your dresser and slipped on a new dress, taking a moment to touch up your makeup in the mirror.

"Yeonjun, there's a shirt that should fit you in my bottom drawer," you said, leaving the room and stepping back into the wildness of the party.

[heartshattering]

Today is an IBS flare day and I'm regretting all of my life decisions

[nightprompts]

&. 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

( dialogue prompts taken from the second season of hulu's the bear, created by christopher storer. feel free to edit and change as you seem fit. )

❛ you ever think about purpose? ❜

❛ i love you, but i do not have time for this, alright? ❜

❛ i have time for this. ❜

❛ you know what the fuck you're doing. you love this shit. it's fun for you. i don't have that. ❜

❛ i'm afraid one day, i'm gonna wake up and you guys are all just gonna just drop this ass. ❜

❛ if this shit is not fun for you, what the fuck is fun for you? ❜

❛ i'm not making the same mistakes i made last time. ❜

❛ what kind of insurance coverage do we have for people falling through the fucking wall? ❜

❛ sometimes, i look like february. ❜

❛ you want a sprite? you look kinda green. ❜

❛ can i ask you something and you can tell me to fuck off if you want? ❜

❛ chef, that's way too much acid. ❜

❛ you, uh, making a sundae? ❜

❛ that actually sounds delicious. ❜

❛ because you're the bear and i remember you. ❜

❛ i love taking care of you. and i always will. you know that? ❜

❛ i'm glad i came 'cause i get to eat this. ❜

❛ i gotta come up with three really great desserts. you got any ideas? ❜

❛ you ever made ice cream before, chef? want to? ❜

❛ it kind of tastes like a, um... minty snickers bar. ❜

❛ so how long you been a cook? ❜

❛ how’d you get good at this? ❜

❛ you can spend all the time in the world in here, but if you don't spend enough time out there... you know? ❜

❛ speaking of dead brothers, do you wanna go to a party? ❜

❛ it looks so pretty on you. you should keep it. ❜

❛ what's going on with you? i know there's something. just tell me. ❜

❛ what are you talking about, i don't give a fuck? why would you say that to me? i give like a huge fuck. ❜

❛ you're not by yourself, alright? i'm right here with you. ❜

❛ did you just throw a fork at me? ❜

❛ i think time spent doing this is time well spent. ❜

❛ never too late to start over. ❜

❛ i just want you to know... that this is really nice. ❜

❛ i'm thinking you're very, very beautiful. ❜

❛ we just don't say hello anymore? ❜

❛ you're wearing a suit? ❜

❛ uh, yeah, i wear suits now. ❜

❛ i'm sorry if i took anything out on you and if I treated you like shit. ❜

❛ i actually do think that we could fit good together. ❜

❛ i could be good at things that you don't really wanna do. and you're obviously really great at a whole bunch of stuff that I don't know how to do, you know? ❜

❛ i'm wearing a suit 'cause it makes me feel better about myself. ❜

❛ i know that you're trying. i see that you're trying. ❜

❛ you just came from a funeral? ❜

❛ yeah, a funeral of all my enemies. ❜

❛ you want me to make you some coffee? ❜

❛ i just need your focus like you need mine. ❜

❛ you good? ❜

❛ what's your relationship with your mom like? ❜

❛ alright, chef, i need you to salt that like a sidewalk. ❜

❛ looks gorgeous, chef. ❜

❛ i haven't eaten yet. ❜

❛ oh, let me make you something. ❜

❛ yeah, i can make you an omelet. ❜

❛ that wasn't like an ask out or anything, was it? ❜

❛  i'm looking really good. i 'm thinking you should start calling me chef. ❜

❛ well, i'mma keep calling you jagoff, 'cause that's what you like. ❜

❛ you deserve my full focus. ❜

❛ i guess i'm scared that i don't have what it takes to not fuck this up. ❜

❛ you're not gonna fuck it up. ❜

❛ i fuck things up all the time, like, every day. ❜

❛ you could do this without me. ❜

❛ i couldn't do it without you. i wouldn't even wanna to do it without you. ❜

❛ you make me better at this. ❜

❛ you still love to cook, right? ❜

❛ how's the wine? ❜

❛ yo. we're low on forks, chef. ❜

❛ okay, let's start firing some caviar, please. ❜

❛ i was just gonna say how special and cool and great this place is and how i'm the most proud of you ever. ❜

❛ i really appreciate you being so patient with me. ❜

❛ do i have time to go outside and scream "fuck"? ❜

❛ just don't tell them you saw me, 'cause this is embarrassing. ❜

❛ i love them so much. i don't know how to show it. ❜

❛ i don't know how to say i'm sorry. ❜

❛ i need you to say it's okay. ❜

❛ you are being so fucking weird, man. ❜

❛ i'm stuck in a goddamn refrigerator on the opening night of my fucking restaurant. ❜

❛ i failed you guys and it's not gonna happen again. ❜

❛ maybe i'm just not built for this. ❜

❛ because no amount of good is worth how terrible this feels. ❜

❛ i'm really sorry you feel that way. ❜

❛ would you shut the fuck up and get me the fuck outta here, please? ❜

❛ i don't understand why you can't just let something good happen for once in your fucking life? ❜

❛ you wanna talk to me about my fucking kid? at least i got a kid. ❜

❛ where were you when i fucking put your brother in the ground, you selfish piece of shit? ❜

❛ i fucking love you! ❜

❛ you fucking need me. ❜

❛ i just had this sudden urge to tell you that i've always had this, like, massive crush on you. ❜

❛ i love you, chef. ❜

[neerons]

Some of Clavis Lelouch’s best quotes + Cyran's bonus quotes

"Tell me, Emma, what do you think is the best way to wake someone who's really bad at waking up? (...) That's right, you stab them." (—Clavis talking about Chevalier to Emma)

"Finding such a handsome man in your room is enough to leave anyone breathless. Take your time. I know I'm easy on the eyes. (...) Oh, nice reaction! There's nothing like a good AHHHHH to get me in the mood."

“I didn’t do anything. But next time, don’t be intimidated by these status-crazed nobles. You don’t owe them anything—not even a smile. If someone looks down on you, look down on them in return. Otherwise, your self-worth will start to plummet. Never abandon your self-respect just to calm the situation. I know you’re a wonderful person—I wouldn’t have chosen you as my wife if not.”

"You succumbed to delusion."

"You weren't paying any attention to me at all. I got so lonely, I almost died!"

"...I want to make love to you."

"I'll tell you a secret about Chevalier. You want to know right? I bet you do. (...) He likes romance novels, but the reason for that is... Me. (...) One day, I secretly added to his pile of books... I put a book that boasted its dewy, spicy romance in the pile."

"Haha! When you're as handsome as I am, you look good no matter what state you're in. You just need better understanding of aesthetics." (—Clavis to the "Obsidianite soldier")

"Haha! You don't need to apologize. Who says only kids are allowed to be bouncy? What's wrong with adults being genuine about loving the things they love?"

"Oh, the things you say! Don't you realize you threaten to unleash the beast that hides behind this gentleman's visage?" (—Clavis' thoughts about Emma)

"What a fool I was to think I was done falling in love with you. The depths I could fall for you seem endless."

“We can do it on the table, or by the windowsill again, if you like. Ah, but I don’t recommend the floor—not unless you’re into that.”

"I would never allow my lovely fiancee to live a life of fear. And so I must take it upon myself to indulge her in a life of joy." (—Clavis' thoughts about Emma)

"Wait, wait, wait! (...) Chevalier, you cannot possibly be trying to replace the words 'I love you' with that one kiss. (...) Why else would Emma have dressed up so beautifully? It's all so she can hear you say those three words! (...) Yes, not all things need to be said, but there is a purpose in giving words to feelings. That's how you can bring them into the real world. Chev, you can't let Emma guess how you truly feel forever. Just tell her. (...) The average person can't read minds like you do. Don't assume that Emma knows everything just because you do." (—Clavis to Chevalier, in Chevalier's route)

"I'm charming, aren't I?"

"Here you are, alone in a secret room with a handsome prince. Why are you only interested in those lifeless husks? (...) That's a little offensive, you know."

"Haha! Go to hell." (—Clavis to Chevalier)

"Goodness, I've never visited that bookstore, and to think it was hiding a gem all this time..." (—Clavis' thoughts about Emma)

"Dear me, it looks like they started running the second they spotted me. Haha! That's optimistic of them. " (—Clavis talking about Yves and Licht to Emma)

"You could at least call it artistic. My handwriting conceals talent that would surpass that of a genius artist. (...) It's readable. So long as you take the time to decode it! Haha!" (—Clavis to Jin)

"Ah... Hahaha! I can't believe you headbutted me! You should've slapped me, at least."

"There's no rule that says you have to drink alcohol once you come of age. That said, it might be more romantic to let you get drunk and then take care of you until you sober up. Wait here, I'll just get some—"

"Of course, I'm not trying to criticize your own personal standards for good and evil. But throughout our lives, we're constantly being confronted by our perceptions of good and evil. And there are times when we might regret it later, if we decide to be critical of something simply because 'it's evil'. Our own individual standards for good and evil may not always be aligned with the kingdom's standards for good and evil. And if that happens, wouldn't you want to remain true to your own standards? To what you believe is good and right?"

"So you're comfortable drinking. I'll keep that in mind." (—Clavis' thoughts about Emma)

"(...) I'm well aware that of all the princes, I was the one most loved by his mother. Although I suppose it's not really a surprise, given how adorable and cute I was. (...) Haha! Why are you apologizing? There's no rule that says we can't talk about the deceased. And there's no need to feel guilty, either. I'm not some silly child who gets all worked up just from thinking about her." (—Clavis talking about his mother to Emma)

"I love drawing attention to myself, you know that. I wanted everyone in the palace talking about me, so I made it seem as if I'd gone missing." (—Clavis to Sariel)

"...You're surprisingly sweet on Emma, aren't you?" (—Clavis to Chevalier)

"Well obviously, because I like rabbits. And from what I know of rabbits... They may seem aloof, but they're actually very sweet and loving, and if you're lucky, they'll even let you see that side of them. I think they're adorable. And despite being delicate and easily frightened, they won't run from anything—they'll stand their ground and put on a brave face. I can't think of any other creature that instills in me such an urge to protect them. You see? Everything about them is lovable." (—Clavis talking about Emma secretly)

"But that's why Rhodolite is so well-balanced. If we all agreed with Leon, the kingdom would constantly be in danger from outside. If we all agreed with Chevalier, it would end up a dictatorship."

"You're about the only person who willingly visits the brutal beast's lair."

"Just so we're clear, this doesn't even count as a setback to me. I've tasted defeat countless times at the hands of a brother more beastly than anyone in Obsidian. I've never once made the right choice. I'm a loser, constantly making mistakes, and constantly being laughed at for them. (...) When you fail, it's easy to give up. It's easy to think your ideas are wrong, and yield to the right choice. But this is what I do. Every time I fail, I get up again, and I fight even harder, so that next time, maybe I won't fail. I don't care about what's right for the kingdom. I stay true to what's right for me, and that's the only way I've found any meaning in my life. Even if what I believe to be right and true is actually wrong, and even if I'm called evil and wicked for doing what I do... I'll fight against the brutal beast's methods with everything I have in me. And I'm not going to die until I've made him kneel before me, and accepted that my beliefs are just as righteous as his are. (...) And since I've spent my life tasting nothing but defeat, I think I can declare this with some certainty. So long as you go on living, you'll never really be a loser. Because there is no such thing. Even if you lost this time, you just have to win next time to be the winner. And if nothing else, you'd be able to die a prouder man than you will now. (...) Today's failures will lead you to tomorrow's hope. Always, as long as you don't give up. And that's why I'm going to get up and try again. What about you? Are you going to die a dog's death here?" (—Clavis to the "Obsidianite soldier")

"What a shame... Were my hands not bound right now... I'd already be making love to you."

"Haha! Not a chance. I adore her." (—Clavis denying disliking Emma to Gilbert)

"I've always tried to be a gentleman, and live by the tenet that women are free to come and go as they please. But with you, I find myself wondering whether I should be using handcuffs, rope, or maybe a strong net."

"All right, then, I guess I'll just have to slip a few weapons into your luggage to help celebrate your departure. At the very least, I've already included a shovel." (—Clavis helping Emma escape from Obsidian)

"My brother is an absolute genius when it comes to angering people in just about every way possible. He outclasses us all in that, too." (—Clavis talking about Chevalier)

"Dearie me, don't tell me you're here for a secret tryst with my brother? I never imagined this unsociable beast might finally have his sexual awakening—" (—Clavis talking about Chevalier to Emma)

"(...) It's a water jet device designed to keep you cool in sultry summer evenings. I made it expressly for you. Isn't it brilliant?"

"The only people he could hold a proper conversation with were those who faced him head-on." (—Clavis' thoughts about Chevalier)

"(...) I don't care about me, but I don't think it's appropriate to be pointing guns at a woman, do you?" (—Clavis protecting Emma from 'someone')

"You really are gorgeous... I'm so captivated by you... that I feel I might forget how to be a gentleman for good."

"You could tie me down any day, my lovely fiancee."

"Ah. Hello, insecurity. I had not missed you at all. If I want to make my lovely fiancee happy, I'm going to need to start being more confident." (—Clavis' thoughts)

"You're so beautiful when you're watching something with rapt attention."

"How could you treat your kind little brother like this, when he worked himself to the bone trying to keep your library nice and tidy? I'm going to tell Emma on you." (—Angry Clavis to Chevalier)

"Well, first, I'd love to be able to pamper you in the bathroom. I want to wash your hair and gently exfoliate your skin so it's super soft. (...) Next, I want to hire a famous artist to draw a portrait of you than I can hang on my wall. I want one so big it'll cover the entire thing. Maybe I'll even get a bunch of you drawn. Seeing lots of you while I work would be good for motivation. (...) Also, I would love it if we could change up how we say good night. Every day, before bed, I want us to say 'I love you' instead of just 'good night'. (...) Oh, it's also my dream to go on a trip around the world with you! I just want to explore new sights with you and kiss and cuddle you in new places."

Cyran's bonus quotes:

"(...) Prince Clavis lies incessantly, so feel free to ignore everything he says. (...) Everything. You've no need to be worried about his feelings, or even keep him company. And it might be in your best interests to refuse to eat any of this." (—Cyran talking about Clavis and his cooking to Emma, in front of Clavis)

"You're still half-asleep, aren't you? You're a disgrace." (—Cyran to Clavis)

"When we finally catch up to him, I think we should team up and give him a good scolding!" (—Cyran talking about Clavis to Emma)

"Since you left me behind like that, I've decided to hold a grudge against you forever. (...) Do it again and I'll throttle you, master or no. Just so you know." (—Cyran to Clavis)

"My Lady, I'm afraid that Prince Clavis's plan is truly stupid. A prince in his right mind would never even plan such a thing, and the average person would recoil in shock at the very idea of it."

"Prince Clavis, you can't just go casually tossing your head in her lap like that. My Lady, you're more than welcome to slap him awake at this point."

"(...) despite all that, there was one fool prince who stormed into the camp where the prisoners were being held. Yep, I'm talking about the idiot prince currently sleeping like a babe in your lap."

"From the way he acts, it's easy to mistake him for a fool and a scoundrel, but... at heart, he's the kindest, most compassionate man I've ever met." (—Cyran talking about Clavis to Emma)

"...So where is he, this handsome man? (...) ...You're a total mess right now, you realize. You look dreadful. Want me to get you a mirror?" (—Cyran to Clavis)

"My Lady, I truly am sorry, but... I've been ordered to inform you that, and I quote, 'your prince is in grave danger and needs you to rescue him! Ahaha'! (...) ...He insisted I include the 'ahaha' at the end." (—Cyran delivering a message from Clavis to Emma)

"Very well. I'll inform him that you said to die in pain and agony." (—Cyran talking about Clavis to Chevalier)

"Really? Are you sure? Ahh, this is great, it means I can get away from my troublesome master for a while. I look forward to serving you, My Lady, and I'll do my absolute best for you!" (—Cyran replying to Clavis' order to be Emma's personal bodyguard)

"My Lady, you're the sort of person who worries constantly about other people, without ever thinking about yourself. Like at the party, when you tried to protect Prince Gilbert from that guy with the knife. That sort of thing."

"...Farewell, my peaceful days."

"...Stay strong, my lady. I know exactly how you feel, but know that I am cheering you on."

[harunayuuka2060]

MC's employer: With all the experiences you have, you could've applied to a better job rather than to stay in this old, pathetic flower shop.

MC: You have accepted my application. Are you regretting it now?

Their employer: I mean, you look kind, reliable, and I'm sure I can depend on you but it makes me so guilty because I can only give you a minimum wage.

MC: That's enough for me, Miss. Now I'm getting back to work. You wouldn't want the customers waiting.

Their employer: Oh surely. Wish you luck again today!

MC: Thank you, Miss. *goes back to the counter*

*a customer walks in*

MC: Hello there. What can I get for you?

Customer: I'm here to buy flowers.

MC: Is it a gift for a special someone? We have a ready-made bouquet.

Customer: No. I want you to choose flowers for me according to this message. *hands them a note*

"Please forgive me and come back."

MC: Perfect. We have all the flowers that you need. Please give me a moment to arrange them.

Customer: Take your time.

MC: *arranges the bouquet; finishes it within minutes*

MC: *returns to the counter* Would you like me to attach this message?

Customer: ...

Customer: No. This will do. Thank you.

MC: Thank you for choosing Fragrant Fields. Have a nice day.

*The customer leaves.*

Asmo: How is it, Lucifer? Did they notice that it's you?

Lucifer: *removes his disguise* No.

Satan: I really thought they would see right through it. Is it because they're no longer a sorcerer?

Mammon: Man! Now what?

Belphie: How about we show up and ask them directly to come back in Devildom?

Levi: Wouldn't that make things awkward though?

Beel: Yeah. MC left Devildom three years ago. We should've done it sooner.

Mammon: Well that's because Barbatos wouldn't let us!

Lucifer: *sigh* Don't start arguing here. We'll think of another way.

MC: ...

MC: Miss?

Their employer: Yes?

MC: I've got a text from my landlady that there was a sudden problem in my apartment. Would it be alright to sleep at your house nearby?

Their employer: Sure. No one's using it anyway. Here's the key.

MC: *chuckles* Thank you, Miss. You're so kind.

Their employer: *waves her hand dismissively* Close the shop for me, okay?

MC: Yes, Miss. Take care.

Solomon: Hello? MC? How are you?

MC: I'm doing fine. By the way...

MC: I've met Lucifer here in the human world.

Solomon: ...

Solomon: Did he bother you?

MC: *chuckles* He was in disguise so... I'm not really sure.

MC: Maybe he's not here for me.

Solomon: ...

Solomon: I wouldn't be so sure about that.

Solomon: What reason does he have to be in the human world other than taking you back?

MC: What for? I'm no longer any use of them.

Solomon: ...

Solomon: MC, I want to visit you. It's been three years.

MC: ...

MC: After I buy myself a house, I promise to invite you.

Solomon: *whines* But when will that be?

MC: *chuckles* I'm hanging up. Please take care.

Solomon: Take care of yourself too, MC. I'll call you again.

MC: *ends the call*

MC: ...

MC: *smiles to themselves* Now I feel so much better.

Mammon: So what time are they going home?

Asmo: It's already late. Are you sure this is where they're staying?

Satan: Yes. I can't be wrong.

Belphie: *is in MC's bed* Satan is right. This is really their apartment.

Mammon: Then where are they?!

Beel: I'm guessing that MC had guessed we're all in the human world and they're avoiding us.

Levi: What do you think, Lucifer?

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer: If that is the case, then I'm afraid I have to drag them back.

MC: *sleeping peacefully*

Luke: MC doesn't seem as exhausted as before.

Simeon: Hm-hm.

Luke: But Simeon, are you sure it's alright to see MC like this without them knowing?

Simeon: We just want to be sure that they're doing fine. And aren't you their guardian angel, Luke?

Luke: !!!

Luke: Y-Yes! I shouldn't feel guilty! It's my job to protect them!

Simeon: Shh. *smiles* You're going to wake them up.

Luke: R-Right...

Simeon: ...

Michael: MC is going to disappear soon.

Simeon: What do you mean by that?

Michael: ...

Michael: When a human disappears, wouldn't that only mean one thing?

Simeon: ...

Simeon: Please prevent it from occurring.

[violetszone]

At Home With Me

Carlos Sainz x fem!reader

From this request

Summary: It was one of the rare days that Carlos spent at home but he hardly spent any time with you and it really upset you.

A/n: It's been a few days since I wrote this, but I didn't have time to share it because of the lesson camp I went to.So I tried my best I hope you like it

Warnings: not edited writing

Of course the days you spent at home with Carlos were numbered.When your boyfriend wasn't racing, he was out for practice and testing almost every day of the week. Of course you wanted him to be successful and you knew these were small steps to success.But you still wanted to at least sit down and talk a little bit, you didn't expect much.

Carlos decided to stay home this Friday, you didn't know exactly why, but when you woke up in the morning you were so happy to see him in bed that you couldn't help but hug him.He slowly opened his eyes and looked at you "Good morning darling, what's going on" you could understand his reaction because of course you didn't always wake him up, sometimes you woke up on his alarm in the morning and at least you wanted to see him before he left.

You shrugged and got out of bed as you went to the bathroom and called out "I just feel like today is going to be a good day, that's all" you walk out of the bathroom with your toothbrush in your hand and realize that Carlos has already left the room.You thought probably he went down, of course you guessed right, he already went down and started doing his daily sports already.

You stood by the door leading to the backyard "Would you like me to prepare breakfast for you" Carlos called out without disturbing his position "No, I'll take care of myself, thanks, even don't wait for me, eat it" even though it was a bit of a disappointment to hear it, as he said, you prepared something for yourself and went out to where he was. You ate your breakfast by sitting at the table a little far from where he was doing his sport and start watching him.

When he finished his sport, he came to you and you had already finished your breakfast and were reading a magazine.He said he'd take a shower and then have breakfast, and placed a kiss on your cheek.You were trying not to upset yourself, after all, the hour was earlier, the day had just begun.

Of course, nothing went as you had hoped, after Carlos had his breakfast, he went outside to do a few errands. When he came back it was late afternoon and when you offered to prepare dinner he said he had already eaten, you were really upset

You left Carlos in the living room to enjoy yourself and went upstairs and read until evening. You didn't think about what Carlos was doing until that hour. When he entered the room and sat on the bed, you looked at him with a pout,he stroked your hair "Are you okay baby, you haven't been out of the room for hours" as you closed the book and placed it on the dresser next to you, your eyes were on the clock. it was already 10 o'clock.

You said "I'm fine let's go to sleep" and turned off the light on your side and settled on the bed with your back to Carlos.Of course you weren't sleeping, your eyes were open and Carlos knew that, he turned on the light and when you stood on the bed and turned to him, he pulled you into his arms.

No matter how angry you were with him during the day, you still felt better when you hugged him, so you wrapped your arms around him and laid your head on his shoulder.Slowly stroking your hair, Carlos said, "I'm sorry I haven't been paying attention to you all day." You looked into his eyes, it was enough for you to him saying that.

You hugged Carlos tighter. "It's okay, you had work to do." Carlos shook his head in disapproval."I still had to make time for you honey I'll make up for it tomorrow I promise you" His words were so sincere and you knew he was a man of his word.You smiled and thanked him and placed a small kiss on his lips.

[seventeensmaus]

telling mingyu✏️ - back to you // wonwoo smau

Wonwoo and I are in the car headed to the apartment to tell Mingyu about us. To say I am nervous is an understatement. I take a deep breath and try to steady my nerves. I remind myself that Mingyu is my brother and deserves to know. I could tell that Wonwoo was a little nervous too, but he was trying to hide it. I guess so I don't get stressed out anymore than I already am. We arrive at the apartment, and we both take a deep breath.

"You ready?" Wonwoo asked unbuckling his seat belt.

"No," I said in a shaky voice.

He took my hand in his and squeezed it.

"I'm right here. You have nothing to worry about. Okay?"

I nodded my head. We took one last deep breath before getting out of the car and heading up to the apartment. As we got to the door I stopped before opening it.

"Ready?" I asked Wonwoo.

"Yea. Let's do it."

I opened the door and discovered that the apartment was quiet. I called Mingyu, but got no response.

"That's weird. He said he was home." I said continuing to walk in. "Let me check his room. Maybe he has headphones in or something." I continued.

Wonwoo nodded his head as I let go of his hand and walked to Mingyu's room. I knocked on his door, but no response. When I turned to the doorknob, I found Mingyu on his bed fast asleep. I smile and walk over and shake him awake.

"Hey, wake up."

"Yn? Hey, sorry."

"Tired?" I asked him.

"A little bit. Works been a lot."

"Sorry to wake you up."

"It's fine. Is he here?"

"Yeah, he's in the living room."

"Okay, let's go. I can't wait to meet him."

"Before we do that, can we talk? Just the two of us for a second?"

"Yea, of course. What's up?"

"I just want to say that he means a lot to me and I hope you understand. You'll know what I mean when you meet him. Also I'm sorry and I love you."

"Why would you be sorry?"

"You'll see."

"Okay? You're scaring me," he said confused.

"Let's just get this over with."

"Alright."

We start walking to the living room. My heart beats fast in my chest. Scared of how Mingyu will react.

"Hey Wonwoo," Mingyu said finally getting to the living room. "What are you doing here?"

"Um, about that." Wonwoo said looking at me which caused Mingyu to look between the two of us.

"You two. No fucking way. He's the guy you're dating?" Mingyu raised his voice.

I stood frozen. I didn't know what to say.

"I am. I know it's a lot to take in right now, but just know I truly care about her and would never hurt her." Wonwoo said.

Mingyu's quiet for a while before moving and sitting down on the chair next to the couch. He has an angry look on his face looking down at his hands. After a moment he looks back up with a smile on his face. Wonwoo and I glance at each other confused why Mingyu is smiling.

"Why are you smiling?" I ask Mingyu.

"You two are dumb."

"What?" Wonwoo asked.

"I knew it was Wonwoo the whole time."

"What?" I asked this time.

"I knew he was the guy you were dating. You're not slick. When you posted the photo of y'all holding hands, I knew it was Wonwoo. That's why I reacted the way I did." Mingyu said.

We were both quiet trying to process what he was saying. I looked at him in shock, unable to say anything. Mingyu continued speaking.

"But," Mingyu said, "I've had time to process and I'm fine with it. Honestly, Wonwoo is better than a guy I don't know. I know Wonwoo is a good guy."

What the fuck is happening right now? This is not how I expected today to unfold.

"So why did you act like you didn't know this whole time?" I asked him.

"Because I needed time to process the fact that you’re dating one of my best friends and I wanted to hear it from you both."

prev - x - next

masterlist

‼️Taglist Closed‼️

taglist: @writingbarnes @soonyoonswoo @skzdesi @asasilentreader @cheolsposts @headlockimnida @map0fthes0ul7 @enhacolor @piplupnani @wonunuwoo @euphoric-univers @fairywriter-oracle @venusprada @wonubun @rikibun @hwayne2294 @hamji-hae @wondering-out-loud @gaslysainz @sikuthealien @imnotsureokay @dinossaurz @teenyfinds @leeknowloves @seunghancore @felixmainacc @siriuslymooned @yyangj3lly @blaycke @badbitch69420sworld @tacosandbitch

[hxney-lemcn]

Dedicated To The One I Love — Connor x gn! reader

summery: A series of events that that reader and Connor share (a bunch of my daydreams put together somewhat poorly)

tw: Connor breaks in and reader freaks out (that one scene with Hank), mentions of alcoholism, mentions of death.

a/n: I'm not super proud of this but it's better than nothing I guess.

wc: 3.1k

Master List

Change is universal, inevitable. No matter how hard you try to push it away, to forget, change will always follow. Change can be slow, barely noticeable until you peer into hindsight. But it can also be fast, like a predator pouncing on its prey. 

We all experience change. From the clothes we choose to wear, to a star blinking out of existence. Growing up, my life wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t perfect either. I’ve experienced relative poverty, but also having unwavering support from family. I’ve experienced my mom choosing to nurse bottles of beer night after night, but I also witnessed her becoming sober. 

Change will happen. There is no stopping it, no matter how hard humans try. But it’s people's choices that decide what that change will become. Whether it’s a good or bad change, or possibly something that doesn’t fit in that binary. My mother has made many bad choices, but it was an opportunity to make me a better person. Showing me what not to do to better myself. 

But change will rock your boat. Like how my mom died suddenly, and I was put under the care of my estranged uncle. I suppose estranged is the wrong word. My mom and him were close. Until Uncle Hank lost his son. We tried to help, offer him support, but he pushed us away and turned to the bottle like my mother once did. So being under his care was like reliving those painful memories once more. 

This night seemed to be particularly bad. In my last year of college, I was exhausted half the time. Trying to find a job, an internship, something to help get me out of what’s become a hell hole to me. I didn’t blame Uncle Hank, I can’t imagine losing a child. Yes I lost my mom, but her death was more of just a bitter feeling. I stopped caring for her when I believed she chose her addictions over me, and when she died I was just learning to love her again. 

I was just on my phone, scrolling through social media before I turned in for the night. I felt myself calm when Uncle Hanks drunken shouts died down. I tried to ignore the sudden thud that soon followed, he probably passed out somewhere. I felt bad that I would avoid him, sober or not. But I don’t think I can handle looking him in the face. 

About twenty minutes later, the doorbell rang, making me jump out of my skin at the abrupt sound. My heartrate picked up, wondering who could be visiting us at night? I heard a muffled shout, barely making out what he was saying, I heard the work title of my uncle. I let out a sigh, getting slightly irritated as the person held the buzzer down for a ridiculously long time. I just turned back to my phone, maybe if no one answered he’d realize it was a lost cause? Was it someone from Uncle Hanks' work? Someone who was unhappy with his work? Rolling my eyes at the thought, I wondered who wouldn’t be unhappy with his work. Things seemed to be peaceful once more. Well until the sound of a window breaking made my heart leap to my throat. My heart hammered as I heard the same voice try to soothe Sumo. I stared at my phone. This is when I call emergency services right? 

I felt frozen as I heard the intruder shuffle and try to wake your uncle. Taking a deep breath, I dialed 911 and pressed the green call button before I could back down. Who knows what crazy person is in my house right now. 

“911 what’s your emergency?”

“There’s someone in my house,” I whispered, blood rushing past my ears. I slowly got off my bed, looking for a place to hide, but wasn’t overly cliche. 

“Do you know who it is?”

“No,” I replied. “They seem to know my uncle, Hank Anderson.”

“Are you and your uncle in a safe place?”

“I’m in my room,” I muttered, heart dropping as footsteps got closer to where I was. My eyes landed on my doorknob and I felt sick when I realized I didn’t even lock the fucking thing. “They’re coming-”

“Police are on the way,” The dispatcher alerted. “Please stay on the line, where’s your uncle?”

I quickly scurried under the bed, my breathing becoming erratic both from the small space of the underside of my bed, to how the footsteps stopped in front of my door. 

“Strange,” The voice muttered, muffled behind my door. “It says the call is coming from this room.”

“Where is your uncle?” The dispatcher kept repeating but I quickly hung up. He knew, he knew I was calling 911. He knew where I was. My eyes shut tight, small desperate tears falling down my face when the door opened slowly. The squeak of the door made my heart pump faster in anticipation. 

“Hello?” The man called out. I bit my lip, trying to stay as quiet as possible. “My name is Connor. Android sent by Cyberlife to assist with Lieutenant Anderson’s latest case. I apologize for scaring you.” 

Opening my eyes hesitantly, I couldn’t stop the scream that escaped me as our eyes met. Jump scare much? I scrambled out from under the bed, the claustrophobia finally getting the better of me. I leaned against the wall, taking deep breaths before finally getting a look at the intruder, only for my breath to be taken away once more due to the beauty of the man, or I suppose android, that stood in front of me. 

It wasn’t the best meeting of my uncles companion. Quite embarrassing actually. Especially when the next morning, he was sitting in the living room. I couldn’t help the double take I did, wondering if I should go back to my room or not. 

“Good morning,” Connor greeted before I could do anything. 

“Uh, good morning,” I greeted back, not sure what to do. I was somewhat confused. My uncle hated androids, so knowing he was working with one, no less letting one stay in his house, made me very confused. But instead of commenting on anything, I went to the kitchen. I decided to get myself something to drink, an excuse for leaving my room. I was too tired for this and I had to get ready for class. 

Begrudgingly, I sat down on the couch, hoping he wouldn’t start incessant small talk. I didn’t hate androids, quite the opposite actually. I found them very interesting. I wanted to know how they worked, what their programming looked like, how they managed to replicate the human body so well. Since I grew up somewhat poor, we never owned an android, not that I fully agreed with owning something that seemed so human anyways. So my interactions were limited. It never failed to amaze me how lifelike androids were, and Connor seemed to take the cake. 

His fingers tapped against his thigh, his gaze elsewhere. He looked so human, acted so human, the only reminder of him being an android was the spinning blue led on his temple. I wonder what he was thinking about, what he saw. 

“I apologize for scaring you,” Connor spoke up, brown eyes meeting mine. I looked away, the eye contact making me uncomfortable.

I couldn’t help the awkward smile that fell on my lips, “You’re still on that? Its okay, I probably should’ve answered the door anyways.”

“I should’ve done more research on Lieutenant Anderson,” Connor rebuttled. “I would’ve changed my approach if I knew he was housing another person.” I glanced at him and I couldn’t stop the genuine smile, his eyes held an innocence that made me completely forgive him for the absolute heart attack he put me through yesterday. 

“It’s kinda funny now that I think about it,” I chuckled lightly. 

Connor’s brows furrowed lightly, confusion splayed across his features, “How so?”

I opened my mouth to explain, but paused, not exactly sure how to explain it, “I guess cus the situation was so absurd? It’s not everyday you become an acquaintance of someone you called the cops on.” 

His led spun blue again, clearly thinking over my words, “I’m not sure I fully understand.”

I took a sip of my drink, not sure how I could make him understand, “I’m sorry, I’m not the best at explaining things.”

“It’s okay,” He replied, “Perhaps I will understand in the future.”

Checking the time, my eyes widened, wondering where all the time went. 

“Shoot,” I muttered, standing up quickly and rushing to my room. I got dressed as quick as I could before grabbing my bag. “Bye Connor,” I waved to him on my way out. His departing words faint as I was already trekking to my car. 

Soon, Connor became a comforting presence in the mornings. Once, I used to like getting ready alone, no one to bother me or make me cranky. But now…it was nice with Connor being there. In fact, I kinda looked forward to it. 

“Hm?” I hummed out confused as Connor placed toast in front of me on the coffee table. I looked up at him confused. 

“It is recommended for humans to eat a balanced meal in the morning,” Connor explained. “Unfortunately, I was unable to make anything but toast.”

I blinked, and suddenly I felt myself melt at the action. I smiled sheepishly, taking a slice, “Thank you Connor. This was nice of you.”

Every day Connor seemed to do something that would make my heart beat a little bit faster. I knew it was stupid. He was an android, he couldn’t feel, he didn’t care, he was only there to hunt deviants. 

So why did he slightly smile when I told the lamest joke in the world? Why did he scold me when I didn’t take care of myself? Why did I catch his stare lingering, or how he’d come to me with questions that others refused to answer? 

“I still don’t think our meeting is funny,” Connor said randomly one morning. I was currently house hunting. Having a steady income was a nice change of pace and I was excited to finally get a place of my own. 

I glanced up at him, “Oh?” 

Its been a few years since I met Connor and so much has changed. For one, androids had their freedom. Two, Connor ended up being my best friend, as he’d confide in me and I him. I had found a well paying job and things were finally looking up.

“In fact, I feel guilty when I think about it,” Connor frowned. His gaze fell on me, his eyes soft and he reminded me of a kicked puppy. “I wish I made a better impression.”

I rolled my eyes, “Connor, if anything, you made quite the impression. And besides, if I was really bothered by it we wouldn’t be friends now would we?”

“But-”

“No buts,” I interrupted. “People make mistakes, it’s apart of life. You grow, learn, and change from them. Besides, why don’t you apologize to uncle Hank about it? He’s the one that was really bothered by it.”

“Th-that’s different,” Connor rebuttled, leaning closer to me.

“How?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“He’s not you,” Connor breathed out. 

There it was again. The common occurrence of my heart skipping a beat. Of my heart melting. Of me falling deeper than I already was. So deep in fact, that I’m not sure if I could crawl out of it anymore. The occurrence of Connor saying something so sickingly sweet that I was surprised my teeth didn’t fall out. Something so hopelessly romantic that I wanted to just confess all these overwhelming feelings. No matter how common this would happen, it would always leave me breathless, and a memory for me to rewind like a broken record. 

I wasn’t sure how to reply, wondering what he meant by that. Did he mean in the way I was currently hoping he did? Or was it just because we were close friends? Was I looking to much into things? Why did Connor seem so desperate in this moment?

Our eyes met intensely. His brown eyes searching deeply within my own. I felt a certain tension fall over the room, or was that just me? 

“Your special to me,” Connor confessed, saying my name in the same breath. “Different than anyone else I’ve met. You’ve cared for me, guided me, make me feel alive.” 

I stared at him with batted breath. I couldn’t believe my own ears. Was he…confessing? Do I…confess my own feelings? Did he understand the weight his words currently held? That he was currently cradling my heart in his hands, and could crush it without even realizing it? His sweet, brown eyes once again seemed to be searching for something. 

“Your special to me too, Connor” I whispered. “I’ve never felt as close to someone as I do you. I love making you laugh, even if my jokes are dog shit, I love seeing you smile, and I’m glad you trust me enough to confide even the smallest things.”

I thought I’d be anxious to confess my feelings outloud, but I felt at peace as his gaze was soft, dare I say adoring. 

“You got to be kidding me,” I heard uncle Hank grumble as he passed by the living room. “You got a room for a reason kid, take the cheesiness elsewhere.” 

I flustered, breaking the intense staredown Connor and I had held. 

Ever since that conversation, I noticed that Connor seemed to be more affectionate. His hand would brush mine more often when he’d hand me something. He’d hug me more often, arms lingering longer than normal. 

“Holy shit,” I grinned, eyes wide in disbelief. I just found a place and managed to buy it. I just had to give the down payment and I could move in right away. 

Energy buzzed through me and I left my room to find Connor. Uncle Hank sat on the couch, his drinking habits have improved significantly. Connor stood a little farther away, hunched over a stove. He’d taken up the hobby of cooking, in fact he would pout when he couldn’t cook me something or if I’d already eaten. 

I beelined towards the handsome android and hugged him from behind, “Guess what?”

“What?” Connor asked, cranning his neck to try and look at me. 

Letting go, I stepped beside him, “I got my own house!”

His smile fell, before retaining a clearly fake smile, “That’s amazing to hear. When do you move?”

“Probably in the next week or so,” I replied, for some reason feeling…guilty. 

His stare didn’t shift from the pan that sat ontop of the stove, his shoulders tense. I fidgeted with my fingers, unsure how to make the situation better. 

“I’m proud,” He muttered, the words sounding forced.

“It’s going to be hard to keep up with my payments,” I said without even thinking. My heart beat faster as I surmised that it was too late to back up now. “It’d be nice to have a roommate to help lighten the load.” 

I stared at the brown haired beauty from the corner of my eye as he seemed to piece together what I was hinting at. His gaze swept over to me and I almost choked at how hopeful he looked. 

“I-I could help,” Connor stuttered excitedly. “I make more than enough at the precinct now…a-and I don’t mind sharing a living space with you.”

He reminded me of a golden retriever with how he always seemed to try and please me. The thought made me swoon. And only made me double my efforts in showing him I cared as well.

“Okay than,” I nodded. “Hopefully uncle Hank won’t mind-”

“Please!” Hank exclaimed. “Get the hell out of my house so I can finally rest in peace.” 

Connor and I looked at each other before falling into a fit of laughter. 

“I suppose that answers that question,” I teased with a grin. “Better start packing mister, we’ve got a house to start decorating.” 

The sound of sizzling grew louder and Connor tried to save the meal he was making. Apologizing when it was burnt. 

I let out an exasperated sigh, trudging up to Connor who stared at me concerned from the couch. I laid down, resting my head on his lap, frowning in frustration. Today was just a bad day and I wanted to cling to the one comfort I found consistent. 

Connor didn’t hesitate to run his hand through my hair, soothing my touch starved self. I didn’t even realize I let out a hum of content at the contact. It was nice to share a space with Connor, not having to worry about uncle Hank walking around and making teasing comments. 

“I got you a surprise…” Connor trailed off, his nails scratching my scalp in a pleasing manner. 

“Is it a bad surprise?” I asked, wondering if he was buttering me up right now. 

“I think you’d enjoy it,” He hummed. I opened my eyes and met his loving gaze. 

“Do we have to get up?” I grumbled. 

His smile was so soft, I just wanted to lean up and kiss him. 

“I assure you it will be worth it.”

I froze when I heard a bark. I stared up at Connor in shock and he just gave me a smug grin. I scrambled up, running towards his room where the bark came from. I opened the door without second thought and a puppy barelled towards me, jumping up to meet me. A kitten trailed not too far behind, exploring the world around it. 

A giddy smile rested on my face as I sat on the ground and pet the puppy. Connor joined me, petting the kitten that sniffed at him curiously. When my gaze met Connor’s, my heart stuttered as he was already staring at me with that goofy grin of his. I lept at him, embracing him but also making us fall down, startling our pets. I squeezed him as tightly as I could, and he held me firmly as well. 

“I love you so much,” I confessed without even thinking. I froze, turning ridged in his hold. I tried to pull away but Connor only held me tighter. 

“I…love you too,” He breathed out, nuzzling his face into the side of my neck. 

Change will always happen. Where androids were once seen as emotionless slaves, they turned out to be complex beings, seeming more human than actual humans. When you thought that you’d never be close to an android, you ended up loving one. Things won’t always be perfect, as mistakes are a step of change, but as long as the intentions behind your choices are good, good is likely to follow. And you couldn’t be happier with the choices you made that led to this moment.

[atinystraynstay]

What Are Best Friends For? - Kwon Soonyoung

Synopsis: Waking up next to your crush wasn’t how you expected to start your morning. You remember going to a bar to meet your friends of your best friend, Kwon Soonyoung, but it turns out it lead to something even more.

"So are we going to talk about what happened?"

Pairing: Non-Idol! Kwon Soonyoung x Reader

Inspiration: About Last Night - Monsta X

Genre: Angst - jealous Hoshi, mutual pining, best friends to lovers

Contains: mentions nudity, alcohol consumption

Word Count: 3.1k

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I was staring up at the ceiling. It was already 9:44am but I couldn't get myself to move. My hands were clutching onto the comforter. I recognized the room that I was in, but I couldn't quite recall the series of events that got me here. That is, I wasn't sure how I ended up here in Soonyoung's room practically naked.

Last night, the guys held their monthly dinner. You haven’t met all the boys, but you knew how much they meant to Soonyoung. They were his brothers. All the boys held different careers, which made it difficult for them to meet up consistently. What you always loved about their friendship was their dedication towards one another. For that reason, they all promised one another to meet up at least once a month.

You were also out last night. That you do remember. You went out on a date with someone named Jesse. While you two had things in common, the chemistry lacked. You tried giving your date as much attention as possible, but found yourself checking your phone more times than you’d prefer.

"Hey, where are you? Guys want to go out to the bars and I miss you 😔"

Thank goodness for Soonyoung. That text he sent was a lifeline you didn't know you needed. Feeling a bit guilty, you made up a white lie to tell your date.

"I'm so sorry, I need to get going. My roommate locked herself out of our apartment, so I need to go let her in. Text me?"

Before your date could ask for any additional details, you grabbed your purse and jacket and took off running towards the exit. The nearest train station was about a block away, so you didn't need to run far. You wanted to give off the impression you were in a rush, and you genuinely were. You were just in a rush to make the most out of your evening.

"There she is! Finally! Now we can have a great night," Seungkwan teased as he saw you approaching.

Soonyoung turned his head around to see you, a wide grin on his lips. "That bad of a date you showed up 10 minutes after I texted you?" He teased.

"Okay, bad isn't the word that I would use to describe it, but you could say that," you laughed. "Why would I want to be with a stranger when I can be with a few of my favorite people?"

Out of the band of brothers, you've met Seungkwan, DK, Jun, Minghao, Mingyu, and Woozi. Looking around, there was a full group which caused you to stand up a bit straighter. You at least wanted to give a good first impression before the drinks start pouring.

"So this is the infamous y/n?" One man called out. He had somewhat longer hair, pulled back into a tiny ponytail. He wore a smirk on his lips, amusement written all over his face.

"And you must be Jeonghan," you said, to which the boys were amused. Jeonghan nodded, offering his glass to you before taking a sip.

"At your service." "To cause chaos? Oh god, Hoshi-hyung, you think that's a good idea?" one of the younger man asked.

He seemed a bit older for his age, but was quite young in the face. If you didn't know better, you'd think he was a minor who snuck into the bar. His eyes bounced around the room as he took careful look at everyone. You always admired people who naturally look out for others, especially in social settings like this.

"Let me guess! You are Dino? The kind younger brother who needs to let loose a little?"

The boys snickered as Dino's cheeks flushed. He muttered something under his breath before taking a sip of his beer. "I mean, she's not wrong, Dino. We've been trying to get you to come out with us for months!" One of the other man pointed out.

"Hey! Just because you all barely graduated doesn't mean I'm not taking it seriously," Dino defended himself.

The group began to settle a bit. You always adored Soonyoung's friends, and you were grateful he was introducing you more to his world. And it seems like his closest friends thought highly of you. You couldn't help but wonder how much Soonyoung paid or threatened them to not say anything too outrageous.

"Y/n, what's your liquor of choice?" "Tequila!"

All the guys looked at you as if you had a second head. You raised an eyebrow and shrugged before calling over the waiter, ordering 14 shots for the table. All the while, Soonyoung wore a prideful grin on his lips.

"Hyung, I think you found someone who is right at your level." "Just proves that y/n is the best," Soonyoung responded, winking at you.

You weren't sure if it was the warmth of the room or what Soonyoung just said that caused you to feel your cheeks get warm. You were just grateful to be concealed underneath the lights, so you weren't completely exposed. However, it seems maybe Seungcheol noticed. You've always been warned he has a watchful eye on the entire group.

The waiter, your saving grace, brought over the 14 shots. He laid down the serving tray before you all. Thank goodness. You were the first to grab a shot glass, raising it in the air as a way to pivot the conversation. "Here's to a fun night, boys," you announced.

All the boys eagerly joined you. Seungcheol had a smirk, eyebrow raised. You didn't want to make things too obvious because you knew the rest of the group would start asking questions. And you didn't need that type of pressure when you weren't even sure why you were feeling the way you were.

Much to your delight, the conversations were flowing. You were getting along with all the guys, some of the asking about you and others wanting details about your friendship with Soonyoung. They were probably seeking details they could tease him about. But that also meant that the drinks kept coming thanks to Soonyoung.

And the whole time, Seungcheol was sitting back and watching you. As if he was anticipating for the moment your honesty slips, that you might have feelings for your best friend.

Sure, you've always found Soonyoung attractive. Not only was that true when it came to his physical appearance, but you also adored his personality. He was dedicated, driven, and genuine. Any girl would be lucky to call him theirs.

However, your friendship with Soonyoung was too important to you. You often tried to ignore your feelings, assuming that the reason why they were so intense was because you've been single for the past few months. Soonyoung gave you the attention you yearned for, but you didn't think things would eve work out between the two of you. You were friends first and last, nothing would change that.

As Soonyoung went to go to the bar to order another round, Seungcheol decided to swoop in to investigate. Your group had diminished slightly, making it easier to slide around the corner booth. Some of the guys were out on the dance floor, while others were attempting to flirt with people around the bar.

It was only you, Seungcheol, and Wonwoo at the moment. And Wonwoo was too absorbed in a video game on his voice. Surely, you would spill the truth with almost everyone occupied. Especially the one that conversation would be about.

"So," Seungcheol called out. He scooted closer to you, throwing an arm around you to lure you in closer. And also to keep your voices low, in case anyone would return. He wasn't about to let your little secret out in the open, not yet at least. "How long have you liked Soonyoung?"

Your eyes flew open. You had your body turned, so you were fully facing Seungcheol. The look on his face told you that you had been caught red-handed, that there was no use in lying. However, you were going to try your damn best.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," you laughed. But not even you could deny how warm and tingly you got just at the mention of his name.

"So you look at all your friends as if they walk on water?" "Actually, yes. All my friends are amazing. Not sure if you make the cut with how you're insinuating I could ever be into my best friend. He's like a brother to me." "Kinky, y/n," he laughed. "Come on, your little secret is safe with me. How long? Does he know?"

Seungcheol's face was close to yours. Your heart stammered as you were trying to rack through all the potential white lies you could tell him. Yet, with Seungcheol's strong gaze on you, you were trapped. The truth was about to come out of you one way or another.

"What am I interrupting here?" A voice called out.

Your head pulled back to see Soonyoung behind Seungcheol. You would've smiled, knowing the conversation with Seungcheol would be put on pause. Yet, looking at Soonyoung, something was wrong. The man who normally radiated positive energy had a frown. What happened?

Seungcheol glanced back before sliding away from you. "Oh, nothing at all. I was just chekcing in on y/n."

Soonyoung quickly looked at you, concern replacing the momentarily silence. You glanced between Seungcheol and Soonyoung, trying to catch yourself up on what just happened. All the while, Wonwoo had a smile curled on his lips. That you could tell from his phone's brightness illuminating his face.

"I don't think she feels good," Seungcheol explained. "I was going to get her some water before taking her home." "She's my best friend. I've got her."

Before you could even protest, Seungcheol slid out of the booth which allowed Soonyoung to get closer. He had his hand extended out to you. You glanced at the table to see 4 empty shot glasses on the table, almost like tiny islands. Where as there were a multitude of other empty glasses placed all over from the crew.

"Come on, sweet girl," Soonyoung cooed. "Let's go home."

That's all you can remember. Now, you were laying in Soonyoung's bed without Soonyoung.

"Rise and shine," a voice called out to you. You jumped as you were a bit startled since you were so deep in thought. Soonyoung leaned against the doorway that led to his bedroom. He had two mugs in his hand, hot with the steam rising out of them. But you were too distracted by the fact that he was shirtless and wearing a pair of grey sweatpants.

"Morning," you said softly. There was a slight headache coming on as you moved up, pulling the comforter alongside with you. "Have you been up long?"

He shook his head. He wouldn't confess yet that he has been up every two hours to check on you. You would feel guilty, feel as if you ruined his night especially since you crashed guys' night. Honestly, you being there was the highlight of his evening especially as all the guys commented how they liked you. How couldn't they? For the time being though, Soonyoung was just concentrating on taking care of you.

"No, doll, I haven't. Figured you might enjoy some coffee though, so I went ahead and a fresh pot. I also have breakfast bagels on the way."

Your face lit up as if it was Christmas day. He couldn't help but chuckle as he slowly pushed himself off the doorway. "I see you chose to get comfortable. Sleep well?"

Soonyoung always had this ability to move with such grace, such elegance. He basically floated from the threshold to the bedside. He placed the two mugs on the coffee table before giving you his undivided attention.

"Wait," you said, looking from the mugs back into his eyes. "You didn't sleep here last night? We didn't-" "Oh, y/n. Never would have let that happen," he vowed. "I slept on the couch in the living room. Do you remember anything after leaving the bar?"

Feeling a bit embarrassed and self-conscious, you shook your head. You quickly moved your gaze from your best friend, from your crush to the space in front of you. Your grip tightened on the comforter to make sure you weren't accidentally exposing yourself. "No," you sighed.

Picking up on your mood, Soonyoung quickly headed towards his closet. He began moving his fingers along the hangers, searching for sometihng. You could only hear the movement, assuming he was getting clothing for himself. He definitely was going to kick me out, especially since you stole his bed fort he evening. His couch wasn't the most comfortable thing.

But what are best friends for, I guess?

Soon, a grey hoodie was placed in front of you. You looked back to Soonyoung offered you a gentle smile, motioning with head to encourage you to put it on.

What really sent you for a spiral was the way he turned his back. He was giving you the privacy to slip the oversized clothing over your head. He made it too easy to fall for him.

Seeing that it wasn't up for debate, you quickly slipped the hoodie on. It fits on you like a dress which makes you feel more comfortable. It also smelled like him which solidified the fact that you had developed feelings for your best friend. Fuck.

You cleared your throat to signal for Soonyoung that it was okay to turn around. And when he did, you saw that adorable smile of his. He seemed satisfied to see comfortable once again.

Yet, in his eyes, you could see something was stirring. It was as if he was having a conflict within himself. What wasn't he telling you?

"So," he began, taking a seat at the edge of the bed. God, you were having flashbacks to your conversation with Seungcheol. Your eyes widened slightly as you were worried as to what Soonyoung was going to say. Did Seungcheol text him? "You and Seungcheol?"

It was as if the track record playing came to a screeching halt. You and Seungcheol? You couldn't help but tilt your head in confusion.

"I mean, I wouldn't mind. He is one of my best friends, but so are you. You guys could be cute together. I saw the way he was all over you when I went to get our drinks."

The man in front of you wasn't the confident Soonyoung you've come to adore. This was the Soonyoung who was afraid to be vulnerable, who didn't know if it was okay to communicate his feelings so openly. You could tell that he was anticipating anything, good or bad, by the way he played with his fingers.

"Soonyoungie," you sighed. "Please do not go setting me up with a stranger. He's a nice guy, but he's not my type."

Soonyoung lifted his head, confused. Okay, maybe Seungcheol would've been your type right when you met Soonyoung. You always had a thing for confident men. Which is why it has been so damn easy to fall for your best friend the more his personality began to shine. He is the loudest introvert you've ever encountered.

"But," Soonyoung began, running a hand through his hair. "Cheol-hyung is your ideal guy? That's the type you've always gone after ever since I met you." "What if I want something different?"

It was then, for the first time since sitting, Soonyoung seemed eager. He was like a little kid, always wanting to be looped into every plan and every secret. He looked hopeful. This was just one secret you had hidden from him. Until now.

"What if I told you I've been hiding something from you?" "We're best friends, y/n. We aren't supposed to have secrets," he pouted. "Maybe I was afraid of how you would react?"

He scooted closer to you. His hand moved up to reach offer a hand for you to hold. He always did that whenever he felt like you were about to be vulnerable, always wanting to reassure he was a place of comfort for you. And he was.

"I just feel like the person I might be meant to be with has been right in front of me this whole time. I'm tired of searching in other people for what I truly want."

You prayed internally Soonyoung would understand what you were trying to convey. You knew deep down that you shouldn't be tiptoeing around your feelings. However, you were bracing yourself for the worst which was rejection from your best friend. You could easily play it off that you were attracted to a co-worker or another friend if things went south.

"Like you have fallen for someone who knows you better than yourself?"

Your eyes widened at Soonyoung's statement. You didn't even notice that your hand had slipped into his. Until his fingers slipped in between yours. It was such a comforting feeling to feel his touch, but it was even more electrified under the tension in the room.

"Yeah," you whispered. "Like you have fallen for someone who completes you, who you've always been able to be yourself around." This time, you squeezed his hand gently.

He squeezed your hand back. "Someone like you."

The air left your lungs at how quickly the tables turned. You never imagined that Kwon Soonyoung would confess his feelings for you. It felt like a fever dream.

But you were brought back to reality at the feeling of Soonyoung's hand on your face. His thumb caressed your flushed cheek affectionately.

"I thought I noticed you blush last night, but I thought I just imagining things," he commented. His tone was so soft yet it struck you like a lightning bolt. You didn't even care that you had been caught red-handed. Everything was coming to light. "Why haven't you said something sooner, angel?" "Because I didn't want to lose my best friend," you confessed.

He couldn't help but smile at the sentiment. He hated knowing that you two have been practically on a carousel, too afraid to get off of it because you had become so content being best friends. Truthfully, Soonyoung didn't want to lose you either. He thought if he exposed his emotions he would scare you off.

"I'm not going anywhere," he vowed. Slowly, he leaned in to let his lips ghost over yours. You felt shivers run throughout your body as you tried to reassure your psyche this was reality. "Just say the word and I'm all in. No more bullshit, angel."

"Hell yes."

Soonyoung couldn't fight the grin against his lips. And you swear, you felt him smiler even wider feeling your lips against his. You were smiling just as brightly as you two broke out into a fight of laughter.

So this is what best friends are truly for, huh?

[hearts4golbach]

The Night Shift.

Chapter 5.

Johnnie Guilbert x Fem!Reader.

I woke up in the car to Johnnie lightly shaking me.

"y/n/n, wake up, sleepy head!" Jake teased from the back seat.

I hadn't slept off the alcohol. I was in the front seat, for some reason. I looked towards johnnie. "wait, do you even have your license?"

his eyes widened. "uh, no. but, we're here safe." he awkwardly smiled.

I shrugged. "okay."

Jake casually got out of the car. it was clear he didn't drink as much as I did. Johnnie helped me out of the car. I tried to find my footing, but it was a little difficult. He wrapped his arm around my waist. my face got hot. I knew he meant it in a friendly way, but I had never really received affection like this from anyone, and my friends didn't make me feel like this. I watched Jake haphazardly unlock the door, laughing at him.

"what are you laughing at, bitch? I just wanna go to sleep." He glanced back before shoving open the door.

I followed Johnnie to his room after we said goodnight to Jake. "where can I sleep?"

"you can take my bed, I'll sleep on the floor." he offered.

"no, this is your room. I'll sleep on the floor."

"but you're the guest, just take the damn bed." he laughed.

"whatever, hoe." I rolled my eyes.

his hand flew over his heart. "wow, is that really what you think of me?" he asked sarcastically.

"of course not." I pinched his cheek before flopping onto the bed. he pulled off my shoes for me, which caught me off guard. "I'm a big girl, I could've done that myself."

"I wanted to help." he shot me a soft smile before pulling a spare blanket out of his closet and throwing it on the floor. he reached into his drawer and pulled out a misfits shirt. he tossed it onto the bed. "so you don't have to sleep in your dress. you have shorts or something on under it, right."

"of course, I'm not a slut." I rolled my eyes. "thank you."

he nodded before turning away so I could change. I did so and got myself situated under the blankets. "sleep tight." I heard him call from the floor.

"night, you too." I whispered.

I laid staring at the ceiling for what felt like forever. There was no way I could sleep. everytime I closed my eyes, all I saw was his smile. it felt like I could still feel his arm wrapped around my waist. I smiled slightly, thinking about his laugh. fuck it.

"Johnnie?" I whispered.

he cleared his throat. "yeah?"

"will you lay with me?"

he hesitated.

was he angry?

did he think that was weird?

"i- yeah of course." he stuttered in a sleepy voice.

I watched his shadowy figure stand up and climb under the covers next to me. he turned to face me.

"are you okay?"

"this is the first time in my life I haven't felt truly alone." I admitted.

"what?" he asked.

"I've never felt like someone actually cared. I guess you're the first one."

"so, why did you want me to sleep up here?"

"you're stupid." I mumbled.

he didn't answer.

"I don't know how else to explain it."

"that's fine."

"it just felt empty up here." I laughed.

"I get that."

"do you want me to stop talking? you sound annoyed." I asked cautiously. I didn't know I'd act like this around people while I was drunk.

"don't. I like your voice, I feel like I'm always the one talking." I could see in the dimly lit room he had a small smile on his face.

"okay," I paused, remembering our conversation earlier. "Whenever I was in 8th grade, I was searching for anything I could that would change something in my life, it was so.."

"repetitive?"

"yeah. my friend asked me to hold her vape. she was scared of getting searched since she made the smoke sensor in the bathroom go off." I sighed. "against my better judgment, I went in there and hit it for myself. it was like my life had flipped upside down. I still remember my first buzz. from there, it just got worse." he made a sound, letting me know he was listening. "I was constantly feining. but, of course, I got used to it. everything it made me feel went away. I never got high. I snorted opiates, and ended up getting addicted to those my sophomore year.  I was constantly high my whole freshman year. yet, no one ever noticed me. I had no one."

"why did you quit?"

"I overdosed one night. I woke up in a pool of vomit. no one knew about that either. you're the first person I've ever told. I knew I had to stop before I killed myself. I kept reminding myself that life would move on and nothing could change that."

he didn't answer, just wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tight. I nearly cried. I've felt countless hugs from family, but none felt genuine. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. he smelled faintly of cologne and cigarettes, which I assumed was from Jake. I eventually fell asleep, still wrapped in Johnnie's arms.

[kyleraynermybeloved]

One Of A Kind -Chapter Three

Pairing: Kyle Rayner x Batsis!Reader Summary: Meeting a new friend and secrets being spilled is certainly one interesting way to spend a day. Warnings: Pregnancy, morning sickness, swearing, Christmas mention, fluff, slight angst Word Count: 4.7k A/N: The beginning is a mess but I hope y'all enjoy it! I'm going to pump out some more stuff before I go on vacation in August! OOAK Masterlist

“So, what originally brought you to our humble abode?” You placed the grocery bag on the counter in front of you. The three of you were still standing in the kitchen, a little closer now the initial shock washed over.

“You can thank this one over here. Left his comms on when once he came back, fortunately for him no one was listening, well besides from me. I caught everything up until you went deep into your history before the connection finally ended.” Guy sent a look to Kyle, shaking his head slowly. “Now, I figured I should probably meet this mystery person I’ve heard so very little about for myself. I was lucky you two live together, otherwise that would’ve made my trip a little harder.”

You let out a long sigh, mentally reminding yourself to have a talk with your apparent careless husband. “Okay, I can get behind that.”

Kyle sent a nervous look towards you, shuffling closer hesitantly. “Darling, honey pie, light of my life, you’re taking this all very calmly. Does that, perhaps, mean you’re not angry?”

“Oh, I’m furious with you,” You tried to keep your voice steady as you moved away from his reach. His face dropped slightly at the motion. “But I’ve also kept things from you that I should have told you sooner, so I guess this puts us on some slight even footing. And just so you know, this does not mean you’re in the clear. This is my life you had been reckless with, the life I tried so hard to keep safe. If this was anyone else, we both would be in more danger than you know.”

Tears were pricking your eyes and the nausea was setting in, your stomach fluttered as the rush of emotions became overwhelming. “Now if you excuse me, I’m going to go throw up and when I come back I expect the both of you to be ready to leave for lunch. This is non negotiable.”

You turned on your heel and dashed to the guest bathroom, slamming the door shut as you barely made it to the toilet before the contents of your stomach spilled out. You whimpered as the heaving became too much all too quickly. Resting your forehead against the cool seat felt heavenly for your heated skin, waiting for the next wave to come. Fortunately it never came. The room no longer felt like it was spinning so that was a win.

After a few beats nothing else came up, the queasiness had eased up some.

The knock on the door startled you. You called out weakly for them to come in, you were taking your chances on it being Kyle since Guy had looked like he wanted the Earth to swallow him up whole when you left.

The door opened and you were met with the familiar green eyes you’ve come to long for and love. His face was stoic but quickly softened at your crumpled figure.

“How are you feeling?” Kyle spoke softly, kneeling down, gently rubbing your back.

“Like shit,” you said flatly, leaning into him with a grumble. “I think this week takes the cake of being terrible. It feels infinitely worse than the weeks before. I don’t understand how someone can be this sick during every waking moment of the day?”

“Do you want to stay home for lunch then? I could send Guy out.” He suggested.

You hummed, doing a mental check of your physical state. “No, I think it would be better to go out. I’m going to feel sick regardless so might as well make the most of it.”

“Okay,” He blinked, eyes filled with emotion. You could tell he wanted to say something so you sat patiently for him until he was ready. With a sigh he continued, “I’m sorry I wasn’t careful. I was just so focused on getting to you before anything terrible happened, the last time you had gotten sick I almost lost my mind when you had to be hospitalized. Honestly, I couldn’t handle another repeat.”

You turned in his arms, pulling him close in a hug, his arms wrapped tightly around you as if afraid you would crumble if he let go. “My love, listen to me. It's okay. I turned out okay in the end. More than okay, really. And before you say anything, you already know I would do everything in my power to not let that happen again, especially to you. I made a promise that day at our wedding I would never leave you, that no matter what we’ll always have each other.”

“But I could have put your life at risk. I should have known better. If something were to happen to you- gods, and the baby! If something happened to the both of you I could not forgive myself. I’m sorry I did that to you both.” Kyle croaked out. Your heart nearly broke at the sound.

You knew where this was stemming from, had been there to pick up the pieces that were threatening to shatter completely, caring for a nearly broken man trying so desperately to stay afloat. How one man could deal with all that trauma and still manage to smile and care for you every single day, you didn’t know. You were glad you were there in time before it became too much for him. Had been alongside him to mourn the loved ones he had lost.

“Look at me,” You pulled back to cradle his face in your hands, thumbs brushing over his cheeks, his hands found your hips. “I’m not gonna lie, I was more than scared when I found out the comms had been left on. But it appears that luck was on our side since it was your best friend who was on the other side, a person who I trust by the way.” You said with certainty. “That being said, I know with my whole being and soul that you would never mean harm to either of us. I trust you completely. So don’t get lost in that wonderful, beautiful head of yours.”

“Thank you.” Kyle smiled. You could see thoughts were still swirling in his head, you know this conversation would be continued once you had no more guests.

During that time you pulled him in to give a peck on his nose, which he wrinkled in a grimace. “And as much as I love you, I’m asking you politely to rinse your mouth. Your breath is gnarly.”

You let go with a laugh, smacking his arm. “You ass!”

“Get washed up, lovey.” He placed a kiss on the crown of your head and got up, helping you in the process as well. “We’ll continue this later, let’s get back to our guest who’s awkwardly waiting for us.”

“Oh yeah, I don’t think I made such a good impression. Go ask what he’s feeling on eating, I won’t be more than a few minutes.”

He left with a small pat on your butt. Remembering what a coworker once said about not brushing your teeth after throwing up because it grinds the acid into your teeth, you rinsed thoroughly with water followed by mouthwash. Doing another rinse of both you figured you could do a quick brush now.

It probably wasn’t the best idea but at least the mint flavor replaced the offensive one that had been left in your mouth. It also helped ease the sick feeling that clung desperately to you.

The boys had picked a place nearby the apartment to walk to, they had been chatting your ear the entire way there. Of course, you wished you had offered to drive since the weather had gotten worse, the snow now in huge piles on the sidewalk making you put in more effort than needed to trudge through it.

Thinking about it now, there are only three more weeks until Christmas comes. You had forgotten all about it, too caught up with work to begin shopping. You’ll have to find a day when Kyle was out to go get gifts.

Not wanting to chance it again when you had been called in three days before the holiday last year, the two of you hadn't made any plans ahead of time, not sure if there'd be any last minute assignments given.

The diner had been tucked away towards the end of the block, it was small and gave off a warm, cozy vibe. You picked a booth in a corner, away from the windows with you near the wall and Kyle at the end, Guy sat across from the two of you.

You were trying to decide on getting either soup or sandwich for the better half of ten minutes, your efforts on choosing one was futile because you ended up ordering both

It was Guy who pulled you out of your thoughts. “I’m curious to know how he managed to score a date with you.”

With a mischievous glint in your eyes, Kyle knew what you were going to say first.

“He managed to spill his coffee all down my shirt.” You said with a shake of your head, forcing off a smile to feign the look of disappointment.

“There’s no way he did that, holy shit! And you still gave him the time of day?”

“Well, I was the one who actually asked him out. He was too shocked by what had happened, it was really cute. I like to think he fell for my charm, pun intended.” You laughed.

Kyle let out a groan, hiding his face in his hands clearly embarrassed. Guy groaned at your awful pun, if you could even call it that. But you were very pleased with their reactions.

The full brunt of nausea had returned when the food arrived but you managed to push it down and force food into you so you at least had something in your system. Kyle glanced your way, noticing the change in your demeanor and took your hand in his, rubbing comforting circles onto the back of yours.

“We went out for a date the week after the first, which turned into having dates once a week, which turned into two dates a week after a month, and then three dates a week. Eventually he wouldn’t dare part with me.” You said between bites.

“We've been together for five years now, going on six real soon.” Kyle continued. You hummed, leaning into his shoulder.

 “The first three years we dated, it was interesting to see how it lasted since I was going on and off world for most of the beginning. Coming clean to her helped tremendously,” Kyle noted happily. “And these last two years have been amazing since we married.” The pure joy was evident in his voice.

“What’d you think when he kept leaving in the beginning?” Guy asked you, clearly interested in your thoughts.

“It wasn't as noticeable to me because I travel a lot for work. We were lucky I had that week off, otherwise I don't think none of this would have happened. But his cute charms and loving personality made it worth it.”

“Gross.” Guy faked gagging. “What do you do for work that keeps you traveling?” 

You had been expecting that question to come up. But you wished it had come up later. Looking at Kyle who shrugged, suggesting it was your decision to tell him the truth. You decided on something in the middle.

“I work for a security company, traveling wherever I'm needed to provide my services.” It wasn't the whole truth but it also wasn't completely a lie.

Guy seemed pretty surprised at your job, not expecting that from the cozy nature of your look. “That's pretty neat. Do you stay in the country or do you also travel internationally?”

“Most of the time it's international but the most recent trip was actually here on the east coast. I was happy with the lack of jet lag that accompanies my trips.”

The three of you let the conversation die down to eat your food. The faint music playing from the speakers added to the comfortable atmosphere. It felt like you were catching up with lifelong friends rather than meeting up with your husband's brother for the first time.

“Not to bring up the elephant in the room but does Bats know about you two being together?” Guy asked wearily, looking back and forth at the two of you.

You tensed at the question, shifting uncomfortably in your seat, suddenly more interested in shoving your food around, no longer with an appetite.

“Actually, no.” Kyle coughed. “As far as I’m aware, they don’t know about us.”

“They don’t.” You confirmed coldly.

The air became thick at your tone, sensing this was a topic you did not want to talk about, Guy quickly changed the subject.

“Uhm… Have you guys got anything for the tiny lantern?”

Like a switch had gone off in your brain, your body relaxed against the seat, a soft smile on your face upon hearing the name.

“Tiny Lantern?” You asked.

“Y-yeah. The kid is gonna be a lantern if I have any say. Ring or not, we’re family.”

“Oh, fuck I think I’m going to cry thats so sweet!” The overwhelming emotions began pouring out, tears streaming down your face.

“Wait, no! Don’t cry!” He panicked and looked at Kyle for help, who was equally as flustered and confused as he was.

A small sob came out, you gulped down your water trying to stop the tears from continuing. You really didn’t know why it affected you like this, you were normally amazing at keeping your emotions in check. That’s a lie, you knew exactly why.

“It’s not that, it’s the hormones.” Wiping your tear stained face you sucked in a deep breath hoping to calm down. “Don’t worry about it, I'm fine. They’re happy tears, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

Kyle gave your hand a squeeze, comforting you and turned towards his friend with a smile. That seemed to relieve him. “To answer the question, no, we haven't gotten around to any shopping yet. Well, apart from the prenatals and vitamins she needs to take now. I think that had been our next stop once we dropped off the supplies at the apartment.”

Your breathing had evened out, no longer crying. It was a little embarrassing but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care, your energy now low. That seemed to be another lovely symptom you’ve acquired in the past month, remembering how you felt after your last mission.

“Maybe after a nap?” You suggested with a yawn. “Or perhaps you two could go while I nap?” You were exhausted, possibly due to the whiplash of emotions during the entire time here.

“Of course, let me pay and get some containers for us. I’ll be right back.” Kyle scooted out of the seat and walked to the counter.

The both of you kept quiet, not really sure on what to say.

You broke the silence, “I want to say that I’m normally not like this. I’m usually much calmer, not really a crier.” Not sure why you felt the need to explain yourself but continued. “Sorry I scared you earlier, it’s been a pretty harsh week for me.”

His face faltered for a moment, “Somehow, I don’t doubt that. I apologize for bringing up an unwanted past. I don’t know how long it’s been since you last saw your family but they’re different now, if it makes any difference.”

You sent him a knowing look. Of course you know how your family is doing, you’ve kept daily tabs on them since you left the manor that day.

It was one of the conditions of your new life and job that your boss let you have complete access to anything regarding them. Both in and out of the mask, although you're the only one with access to that knowledge.

“The things Kyle told me about you when you were in the bathroom makes you out to be a strong and loving woman. I don’t doubt that one bit. You’re good for him, he’s much happier than before and I know it’s thanks to you.” Guy sat back in his seat, sent a warm look to Kyle and turned back to you.

Your heart warmed and you felt lighter. Like a tension had been released from your shoulders. Looking into his eyes you only saw comfort and admiration shining through.

“Thank you, I know you mean so much to him too. I’ve heard and seen the way you treat each other like family, it’s of great importance to me having you out there with him keeping each other safe. Just know you’re always welcome to stop by, whether that be for him or to crash. The door is always open for you.”

There was a faint blush that crept up his neck. “Thank you, that means a lot coming from you.”

“Any time, although I do have one request… actually two requests for you.” He motioned for you to go on. “First, if you could keep us, me and the baby, a secret from the others, just until we’re ready.”

“That’s understandable, don't even have to ask.” He smiled.

“You might want some background information for the second favor. I have this friend of mine, a kid that I look after whenever he’s in town, actually his entire family are friends of mine.” You rambled on, taking a moment to breathe. “Anyways, he crashes with us from time to time, but is a little weary of strangers. So, whenever you’re here around the same time as him, if you could possibly ease up and maybe… give him space. Just so he doesn’t freak out.”

“That’s certainly something.” He chuckled. “But I’ll be on my best behavior, since you asked so nicely.”

Wishing you could believe it you knew better than to hope for a miracle. You knew with the two of them together they'd end up destroying the whole apartment complex. Billy had confided in you that you Rayners and his family are the only people who know about his identity, but that doesn't mean he'd stop being his chaotic smack-talking self around Guy. The less they interact with each other the safer your home will be.

Kyle came back with a few containers and you all quickly filled them before heading out, you hailing a taxi to avoid the cold before the two could oppose.

*****

You woke up much later in the day, the sky was dark but that was expected in the winter. The smell of food welcomed you, no longer feeling sick for the time being although you knew it would be a matter of time before it returned.

Making your way out of the bedroom there were bags littered along the hallway, leading to the living room where you found Kyle and Guy sitting on the floor reading instructions with parts on the floor in front of them

“Aren’t you two a sight for sore eyes.” Their heads shot up in your direction, surprised at your arrival.

“Hey sleeps, you’re up! There’s a dinner plate on the counter for you,” Kyle nodded towards the kitchen counter where there was a steaming plate of food.

You crossed the room grabbing the plate and walked back sitting on the couch closest to Kyle, judging by all the pans on the stove top he made dinner for all of you. He gave your calf a quick squeeze for his own comfort, fingers lingering.

“What are you two building?” You asked in between bites.

It could have literally been anything. The random parts on the floor didn’t give you any clues at all, whatever container they had been in was gone as well. Kyle and Guy shared a look, having a silent conversation while you ate, looking between the two of them perfectly content on waiting them out.

Guy spoke first, “It was supposed to be a surprise for when you woke up, a gift for the tiny lantern.”

“It’s a crib for our little bean,” Kyle continued eagerly with a grin. “It’s the same one you were looking at online, you’d mentioned wanting it and I thought we might as well get it now.”

Looking over at the parts in front of you it slowly clicked together. It should have been obvious from the start but your sleepy baby brain hadn’t booted up when you had looked at the familiar soft gray pieces all laid out for them.

“You do know we still have like another seven months until our bean joins us, right?” You asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Yeah, but I was a little eager and Guy suggested it was a good idea to get started with the big stuff early on rather than wait until you’re farther along.”

Guy held up his hands, “Woah! I didn’t do anything, you’re just easily suggestible.”

“No, you’re the one who put the idea in my head.” Kyle bickered back.

You chuckled into your food. Kyle smiled up at you before turning his attention back to Guy who was smirking at him. It was obvious to Guy that you and Kyle were completely in love with each other, he was glad his best friend was happy.

“Well, thank you both for the amazing gift. The only thing we need to do besides building this is to figure out where we’re going to put it.” You said.

“Are you not turning the guest room into the nursery?” Guy asked you both.

You shrugged, “We only found out three days ago we’re expecting so we hadn’t really thought that far ahead. I mean it would be smart to do that but what about when we have guests staying over?”

“Maybe we could let our little bean stay in our room with us so they’re within reach, and we keep the guest room as is, at least for now.” Kyle suggested.

“I think you might need to invest in a larger home, this apartment is gonna get cramped real soon. You have some time to decide but don’t put it off at the last minute.” Guy piped in.

“It honestly wouldn’t be a terrible idea to get a bigger place,” you agreed. “We do have a stable and good enough income to go looking. Alright then. I’ll leave you two to build, I have maternity shopping to do.” You got up and loaded your plate into the dishwasher.  “Babe, do you know where my laptop is? I think I misplaced it again, I couldn’t find it when we got back from lunch.”

He mumbled instructions to Guy then turned to answer you. “Yeah, the rascal asked if he could use it for the weekend to do a school report so I dropped it off. You can use mine, it should still be charging on my bedside table.”

Of course your unofficial son was borrowing your laptop, this shouldn’t be news to you. You did your best not to trip on all the bags that were still placed around the hallway floor, making a mental note to inspect their contents later. 

For the time being you made yourself comfy on the bed with the laptop in your lap, you had some shopping to do since it was getting more difficult to squeeze into some of your clothes. Everything was slightly snugger than they normally were but in due time nothing would fit.

Time must have flown by quickly because a very exhausted looking Kyle walked in, shutting the door quietly behind him. You weren’t sure if it was the pregnancy spurring on your feelings but he looked downright beautiful. His hair was a tousled mess, half-lidded eyes struggled to stay open, and his pout was too cute. “Were you able to find anything good and comfortable? Should I be worried about fighting off wandering eyes when you look gorgeous in whatever outfits you got yourself?”

“Only found a few things but since I have no clue what I’m doing I bought them in different sizes and I’ll return whatever doesn’t work. As for fighting off others, I’ll handle that myself but you can do as you please,” you closed the laptop as Kyle got on his side of the bed, setting it aside and gave him your undivided attention. “So… are we good to talk about it? Our situation.”

“If you’re asking if the walls have ears, no– we’re good. Guy barely made it to the spare room before he passed out. Damn crib took all our energy. It was impossible to put together.”

You let out a laugh scooting closer to Kyle, he pulled you both down so you were laying down with your back to his front where he could easily wrap his arms around you. He let his fingers rub away any lingering discomfort that came with the stressful day.

“I want to start off by apologizing for not telling you about my past sooner. I mean, we’ve been married for years now and the only thing I told you was that I had left my old life behind and took up hiding behind this new person I created. It wasn’t right nor was it fair of me to do that while you gave me everything and more.” You sighed, placing your own hands on top of his.

“Believe me when I say I knew what I was getting into when I decided to marry you. Your job alone requires you to erase your existence both in the virtual and physical world, it’s a miracle we ran into each other when we did otherwise I wouldn’t have the love of my life in my arms right now,” Kyle gave you a gentle squeeze. “You can say I don’t know anything about your past but don’t you dare say I don’t know anything about you. I know your favorite color and how you try to keep something on you that closely matches it.

“I know your eyes light up whenever you get to a good part in a book. I know how after a bad day of work you love it when I get a bath ready and have dinner prepared so all you have to do is wind down and relax. And I know that when I get too overwhelmed and start panicking you’re always there to bring me back to reality and calm me down– how you’ll drop everything to come to me to do it. These are all the little things that piece you together, the only things that matter. I don’t care that you hid that part of you but I would love nothing more than to learn about it when you’re ready and when you’re willing.”

It was incredibly hard to keep the tears back but your sniffling gave you away. There was no one more understanding and kind than your husband and it broke your heart you never had the guts to completely spill all your secrets to him. He had all your trust, love, and support and you hoped he felt the same.

“Have I told you how much I love you?” You turned your head and kissed him.

“I don’t believe you have, maybe I could do with some reminders.” Kyle gave you another peck when you pulled away.

You both stayed silent for a moment, soaking in each other’s presence and warmth. You might have thought Kyle fell asleep if it wasn’t for the long yawn coming from him.

“Babe?” you whispered and waited for a response before continuing. “Guy is right. We’re going to need to find a bigger place, it might be time to start looking into some houses. Get a nice place to stretch our legs, lord knows we’re going to need the extra room once our little bean is here and the Marvel gang makes it their life mission to help out.”

“Okay, we can start looking tomorrow– after we get some rest.”

You eased out of his arms to turn off the lamp and he immediately pulled you back to him when you were done. “Alright, tomorrow then. Good night, I love you.”

“I love you too, sleep well.”

Now, with the heavy weight off your chest you were able to fall asleep without a problem for the first time in a long time.

[jilixthinker]

embryos

☆ MASTERLIST ☆

PART 1 PART 2

pairing: felix × jisung

genre: angst, supernatural, smut

summary: "purity. those who possess it can have the access. it's like a key. only the pure souls who die in your world can enter in mine. the only requirement is a body. flesh in exchange for the eternal sun".

word count: 5.5 K (in part 1)

content warning: depression, death, mentions of suicide, pain and sufference, parallel universes, smut, jisung and felix are so in love it hurts, eventual happy ending

a/c: i wrote this a few years ago and never finished it, but i cared so much about the idea itself that i forced myself back to finally put an end to it. i still don't know how many chapters i will divide this into, but i guess it will be 3/4 maximum. please, enjoy it at least half as much as i did ♡

I have never been a diamond. For as long as I can remember, I have always sided with the useless. Many have tried to make me face who I am, and still, the only thing I could see were black eyes and no intention to exist. Even after years, when I look in the mirror, my image continues to show me something I do not recognize as myself. I never wanted to shine, I was always at the bottom of a hole. Never a diamond, just a lightless opal. Strings pulling a puppet without someone to maneuver it. A reflection.

Jisung wakes up the way incongruents do. He opens his eyes, blinks twice, maybe three times. As the light overbearingly invades the room, he curses and swears at everything around him. If he knew more than one language he would probably curse in that one too. He throws his legs off the bed and slowly stretches them. He arches his back like a cat and feels his vertebrae snap as if they were moving away from each other.

The first foot on the icy floor is traumatic, as always, and the second is certainly no better. With shuffling steps he makes his way to the window, the cause and fault of all that light, and behind the wide-open sashes he finds a busy Seoul, more alive than ever. Jisung snorts contritely and pulls the small rope that holds the blinds up. Only when the room stagnates in a lazy half-light, he lets out a sigh of relief. He takes two steps toward the mattress and for a few seconds he thinks about throwing himself back on it, fuck all commitments, classes, university, and fuck his phone that just decided to ring.

Groping around, with his eyes still half-closed, he slips an arm under his pillow and looks for the cause of all that noise. He brushes against the cover of his cell phone, which slides a few inches forward, slipping from his fingers. Oh, that's perfect. Thank you. When he finally manages to grab it, he unlocks the call without even looking at the screen.

"No".

From the other line he ears a grunt and a cough, then an overly deep voice.

"No, what?"

Jisung rolls his eyes and sits on his bed, crossing his ankles and shaking his head.

"Minho?"

"No, your majesty the queen. I won't take a no as an answer from anyone, especially not from you".

More noises in the background. Jisung thinks he hears a slap, another grunt, and the squelching sound of a kiss.

"Jisung? Sorry, that animal took my phone from my hands while you were answering me".

Another voice, much more graceful and alert than the previous one, rings inside his ear. Jisung barely pulls the device away while looking up.

"Do we want to continue with all this whining or are you going to tell me why you called me? I'm quite busy".

"Busy? Are you jacking off? Anyway, I heard you answering no. And you know I don't accept a no as an answer from anyone, especially from..."

Jisung stands up from his bed and stumbles over a slipper. Not that balance has ever been his best quality.

"Did you and your boyfriend decided to talk the same way to irritate me endlessly? Because you always do it without even trying, just for you to know".

The voice squeaks in a distinctly offended tone, and Jisung can imagine his interlocutor's lips curving into a grimace.

"Han Jisung, if you don't get your ass out your house and get ready in twenty minutes, I swear to God I will set fire to your life and everything I can find in it. You cannot miss another class. That is mandatory".

The sound of the closed signal wakes Jisung up from the morning fog. He runs a hand over his sweaty face and, with the phone still wedged between his shoulder and head, he whispers.

"Good morning to you, Chan".

+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*

After twenty minutes and many other curses, Jisung is standing outside of his elegant building. His lace-up shoes, combed hair, and an off-white shirt shine as if lit by stage spotlights. He glances at the expensive watch he wears on his wrist and he thinks that, if impressions were always right, then he would be a spoiled daddy's boy with a beautiful girlfriend and a perfect life. Instead, he reflects bitterly as Chan's car pulls up in front of him, he is a daddy's boy who hates his privileged status, with no one beside him and a nuclear explosion always about to burst his brain. But there is no need to worry. Impressions are everything.

"You have awful dark circles".

Jisung slips into the back seat of Chan's expensive car. He tosses his shoulder strap and smiles sarcastically at Minho.

"I wouldn't worry about other people's dark circles with an ugly face like yours".

Minho bursts out laughing, slowly driving back into the lane. Jisung leans toward the seat in front of his, hugging the backrest.

"Someday you will explain to me why you always let him drive your car".

Chan turns to look at him and pinches his nose. He does this on purpose to make him nervous because he knows how much Jisung despites physical contact.

"Because I can recognize my limits, unlike you. And don't try to deflect the topic. You missed a week of classes, the professors were starting to get impatient, and I couldn't take notes for the three of us. Can you explain what the fuck were you doing?"

Jisung shakes off his best friend with a vacant stare.

"The three of us?" He asks, sidestepping the question.

"You know that this animal", Chan reaches out to point at Minho "does everything but paying attention. However, an answer would be more than welcome".

Jisung huffs and crosses his legs against the seat in front of him. He does not want to answer. He has no reason to justify his absence from classes. He did absolutely nothing during that week. He procrastinated everything that could be done, ate very little and showered even less. He spent all his time lying on his huge bed in his huge house, alone, looking at the ceiling and thinking about how his life was going in a completely unfamiliar and negative direction. Starting with the university that had been chosen by someone else, his house that had been delivered to him already furnished, and all the relationships that he had that now seemed false, distant, and unattainable. Jisung felt like his essence was been split against his will and another person was living his life. His real self was behind a mirror, imprisoned and motionless, watching him silently, without uttering a word.

He closes his eyes and presses his fingers to the junction of his nose.

"I had a fever, I couldn't get up".

Chan sighs. He doesn't believe him for a moment, but insisting with Jisung is like yelling to a mountain to get up and walk.

+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*

Minho pulls over near the curb to let Jisung and Chan off. He said that he will not join them. He has an interview with a colleague of his parents who may decide to take him as an intern. Chan places a kiss on his boyfriend's lips. A kiss that, according to Jisung, lasts a little too long considering they are not alone, and then he runs into the cafeteria next to the university to get them two iced americanos. Jisung picks up his briefcase and smooths out the creases on his blue cigarette pants.

"You are not well".

Minho is looking at him as people may look at an underfed dog on the side of the road.

"Why do I feel like this is not a question?"

Jisung gets out of the car and closes the door, then walks over to stand next by the other boy and he scrutinizes him for a few seconds. Minho works as a model, it's inevitable for him to be attractive. He has muscular legs, fair skin, and big eyes. But Jisung knows that's not the reason he was hired. The truth is that Minho knows exactly what he wants, from everything. From his job, from his relationship, from life. He has a very strong determination that is impossible not to notice in his gaze.

Jisung instead, and he turns around to look at his image in the rearview mirror, has the gaze of someone who does not even want to be noticed.

"It wasn't. It was an observation".

"I don't need any help".

"I know. You and I are the same".

Jisung bursts out laughing, his laugh drained of any sort of amusement.

"You and I have nothing in common, for your luck".

Minho smiles at him accommodatingly as he places one hand on the steering wheel and one on the gear. Jisung steps out of the car and onto the sidewalk.

He looks at his reflection on Chan’s shiny red car. He can barely recognize the lips he was so proud of, even if it’s ridiculous to think about it now that it seems like centuries have passed. They are a lurid, wispy copy of what they used to be. He has absolutely no recollection of how long it has been since he last kissed someone with that mouth. There is not a single time he can look at himself without a sense of nausea pervading him from head to toe and forcing him to look away immediately. Despite his best efforts, however, his image haunts him wherever he goes and whatever he does.

A rather violent push wakes him up from his thoughts. Minho is still in front of him, huffing because the light is still red and preventing him from moving forward. Jisung turns his head to see where the push came from. He catches a glimpse of the back of a boy who is quickly walking away.

"Hey!"

He yells at him loudly enough so that the latter can hear him above the infernal noise of the traffic, but the boy keeps walking fast, almost quickening his pace.

Jisung moves forward and decides that no, he absolutely does not want to be ignored like that by someone who has just run into him.

"Hey!", he repeats, and starts running until he finds himself behind him. A few meters behind, the green light finally lets Minho turn on the engine.

"I'm not saying you have apologize, but at least you could turn around".

Jisung grabs the arm of the rude stranger who quickly walks into the crosswalk, dragging Jisung with him. He doesn’t even give him a glance and doesn’t turn around.

Jisung opens his mouth and now he is sure that he will not continue to be so kind if this guy is going to avoid him. He absentmindedly hears Chan's footsteps coming out of the cafeteria and he's about to tell him to wait for him just a moment, just long enough for him to clear a few things up with the stranger who has, he's pretty sure, hit him on purpose.

Instead, his ears catch only the sound of the two coffee cups slipping down from his friend's hands and a shrill quiver. He just has the time to turn his head and see Chan with his mouth wide open and his eyes terrified, standing motionless on the sidewalk, with one hand extended in his direction.

"What..."

But he does not have the time to finish the sentence because he feels a tug from the stranger he is still grabbing by the elbow, and then a dull pain.

The last thing he senses is an immense red stain in front of him, smell of burning tires irritating his nostrils and a loud ringing noise in his ears. Then nothing.

+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*

beep beep beep

-Jisung-.

Jisung hears a familiar voice calling him. Jisung? Was that the right name? His ears do not react. Another low sounding voice echoes around him.

"Jisung. Come back. We won't let you go".

Something touches his face, very lightly. A deep breath. Jisung tries to figure out in what position his body is placed. He feels forced into something even though he is almost certain he is lying down. He seems to be missing a piece, a part of himself. There is a strong foreign smell of disinfectant alcohol. He tries to open his eyes but cannot find the right muscles to do so.

"Please".

The first voice, the softer, more familiar one, continues to speak to him. He feels a hand caressing his face and eyelids. Once he feels that pressure, he finally identifies where his eyes are and manages to blink once.

"He is waking up".

It takes him a few moments to bring the scene into focus. There is too much white and the light is glaring. He sees, first blurred and then increasingly sharp, three faces leaning over him. Two of them he recognizes, one of them he does not know to whom he belongs. He closes and reopens his eyelids several times until he completely focuses on his surroundings.

"Where..."

He tries to speak but his voice is unfamiliar, as if he had just finished working in the mine. He coughs and regrets it bitterly a second later. Every breath causes him a painful twinge in his chest.

"You are at the hospital".

Chan speaks to him with shining eyes. Jisung turns his head and sees several tubes attached to his arm.

"What?"

Minho curls an arm around Chan's waist and pulls him close. The doctor, the man whose face he did not recognize, checks the IVs and the monitor beside his bed.

"Talk and move as little as possible. The more you try to rest the faster we can discharge you".

He gives him a smile, then looks apprehensively at the two boys next to him and leaves the room.

"What", repeats Jisung panting. His breathing quickens as he realizes where he is.

"You had an accident". Minho squeezes Chan tightly as he speaks. "You crossed the street all of a sudden, I was too close. I tried to hit the brakes but you were..."

He pauses for a moment, closing his eyes. He tightens his lips as he tries not to fidget like his boyfriend.

"Jisung", continues Chan. "I came out of the cafeteria and I saw you crossing the street with someone. The light was green, Minho was a meter away from you, he couldn't stop on time. He literally drove all over you. You were in a coma for a week. I, we thought ..."

His words are interrupted as he begins to cry his body shaking violently.

One week. One week of coma. Jisung's eyes are wide open and he feels his heart stop.

"We thought you wouldn't make it".

Minho's voice is terribly serious. It is obvious that he feels responsible for what has happened.

"What do I have now?".

The voice seems not to belong to him, as if it came from miles away and he heard only its distant echo.

"You have nothing, that's what no one can understand. You should have your pelvis broken, together with all your ribs, arms and legs. You should have a head injury. You should be dead, really. They did all the checks on you as soon as you got here. Nothing came up. In fact, you weren't even really in a coma. It was like you were asleep. No one has given a plausible explanation, Jisung. It seems like a miracle".

At those words, Chan detangles himself from his boyfriend's protective embrace and collapses on Jisung, crying on his neck and caressing his shoulders and all the parts he can reach.

"I will never be able to forget the noise the car made when it crashed into you. Never".

Minho lowers his head and begins to tremble as well before slumping down in the chair beside the bed. Jisung just lifts his arm to let it rest on Chan's head and stroke his hair. The movement costs him immense effort.

"It's not your fault, Minho".

Minho sinks his hands into his hair and a few tears line his cheeks.

"Yes it is. I should have gone slower, I should have tried to stop earlier, I should have..."

Jisung raises a finger to silence him and shakes his head very slowly. No, he mimes with his lips, it's not your fault. Chan seems to recover and looks up at him.

"I don't think I've ever been so afraid in my life". he whispers and caresses Jisung’s sweat-soaked forehead.

Jisung closes his eyes. He feels his head bursting as if he had a crowd of people inside of it, jumping and banging their feet on his brain.

A week asleep in something which is not even a coma. Nothing broken, no repercussions. Like it never happened. It seems so unreal to him that he thinks he's going to wake up in his room, with the alarm beeping annoyingly and no will to go to class.

Then, in a second, a thought hits him on the spot and he stiffens.

"There was another person. There was another person with me".

It’s little more than a hiss, but Chan and Minho hear him. The two boys look at each other, and Jisung clearly sees something snap. He can almost hear the sound of it when Chan takes his right wrist in his hands, gently.

"The other person died".

Jisung does not sleep that night and neither does the following.

+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*

Jisung is discharged three days later.

His parents called him from the US. The line was bad and he couldn't say much. Not that he had much to tell, he couldn't remember anything, and he wouldn't have wanted to hear their voices anyway. Their son could have died in a car accident, and they didn't even care enough to take a plane to visit him. But he expected it after all. In fact, he is not even that disappointed when he finds out that Chan and Minho were the only ones staying with him during the days he was unconscious.

Jisung decides not to ask the other boy's name. He simply cannot. And even though he does not believe in the existence of God, he thanks him. He thanks him all the way home, with Chan and Minho attached to him, afraid to let him move. He thanks him for seconds, minutes, hours. He thanks him, but not for being alive. He thanks him because he didn’t see his face. If he had, if the boy had turned around when he grabbed his arm, his face would have been sculpted in his mind like a firebrand.

But he didn’t see it, and that allows him a sort of detachment, some dignity. It spares him some pain. That’s why he is grateful to a God in whom he doesn’t even believe. Maybe Jisung will be able to move on without the remorse hunting him, reminding him that if he hadn’t chased him, if he hadn’t screamed and touched him, the boy could still be alive. alive. alive. alive.

"Jisung".

Jisung looks away from the buildings flowing behind the cab window. Chan smiles at him. Minho, two days earlier, confessed that he destroyed the car. He would never be able to get into it again after the accident.

"I'm fine". he answers to the unspoken question.

In fact, it's not even a lie. He is fine, he feels no pain whatsoever and he is able to move perfectly as nothing ever happened. But then he remembers the nape of that neck, the slim waist, the thin arm he grabbed, and he realizes that no, he is not fine at all.

They get outside of his building a few minutes later. Jisung stares at it, standing imposingly in one of the most luxurious parts of the city, and inside he knows he doesn't deserve any of that.

"I'll walk you upstairs".

Chan takes his hand and tries to open the door, but Jisung pulls him back and forces him to sit back in his seat.

"No need. I can go. You guys go and rest".

"Jisung, I will not leave you".

Chan crosses his arms over his chest and looks at him seriously, with a worried frown in his voice.

Jisung knows he just wants to protect him, but Chan doesn't understand how much he needs to stay alone with himself and his thoughts.

"But I need to be alone".

Minho nods understandingly and holds his boyfriend against his chest.

"Call us if you need anything. You know we are here".

Jisung forces a smile. Minho looks at him and he knows it's not spontaneous, but he appreciates that he tried despite everything.

"I know. Thank you".

He gets out of the cab with his small bag containing his clothing, medications and tranquilizers, plus a prescription for a psychologist session that he is certain he will not use. The vehicle behind him disappears into the traffic.

Jisung looks around and everything seems so strange, unnatural, and different, almost frightening to him. With a sigh he crosses the threshold of the building and walks down the hall feeling everyone's gaze on him.

Before anyone can speak to him, however, he steps into the elevator and leans his back against the polished wall. He looks up and tries hard not to think about when, an instant before the crash, he pulled the boy against his chest.

When he enters in his apartment, it almost seems that time did not pass. Everything is still as it was the day of the accident. When Minho came to get his clothes he evidently did not touch anything else, and Jisung mentally thanks him for that. Jisung faces the bed, which is still unmade, and throws himself on it carelessly. The mattress bounces under his weight.

The window is closed, but Seoul's afternoon light filters inside from the large living room balcony. Jisung curls up and closes his eyes trying to silence the voices in his head, and he thinks that somewhere in the universe someone must really hate him.

+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*

He wakes up that it is barely dawn. A dim ray, too weak to really disturb him, hits his sleep-wrinkled face and softens his forehead. He has been tossing and turning in bed all night. Not that he thought he was going to sleep, but he hoped that his head would give him at least a few hours of rest before starting to replay in slow motion the full dynamics of the crash. He listlessly gets up and shuffles into the kitchen, opening the refrigerator in search of something to eat.

He picks up a jar of yogurt, but when he looks at the expiration date he tosses it into the dumpster. A black banana falls into his hand. Jisung shudders because he only eats unripe fruit, and he throws that too. Eventually he finds a box of rice cereals buried on the top floor of the pantry. He begins to eat it leaning against the peninsula of the table while chewing slowly and looking out from the balcony. The city has woken up before him, as far as he can hear from the sound of the engines and horns coming from outside. Living on the top floor of a building in Gangnam is irrelevant if you can't have some peace, he thinks.

When his stomach seems to have calmed down, he decides to take a shower. Maybe that will wash away the horrible feeling of heaviness, together with the hospital smell he has been carrying around for days.

He is about to take off his shirt and pants when he hears his phone ringing insistently.

"How are you?"

Jisung lowers his pants and boxers in one swoop while he puts his phone in an impossible position on the crook of his neck.

"As I should".

"And that is?".

"Like shit, Chan".

He hears a soft snort from the other line. He can imagine his friend pacing up and down in his apartment, trying not to wake up Minho.

"Do you want me to come over? You won’t have anything to eat. I'll bring you lunch later".

Jisung takes off his shirt too and stands naked in the half-light, crossing his legs and closing his eyes.

"Thanks but it's not..."

Chan interrupts him, the angry tone clashing with his pain.

"Han Jisung, don't tell me it's not necessary or I swear I'll kick your ass. I'll just bring you lunch. And don't you dare not to open the door. I spent the night thinking about you, all alone in that huge thing you call home, so I expect you to eat whatever I’ll get you. Did I make myself clear?"

Jisung remains silent a few seconds, waiting for his friend to finish his rant.

"You have made yourself clear. But now get a couple of hours of sleep. When I said I feel like crap I didn't mean I'm going to jump out of a window. Okay?"

"Not at all. See you later".

As usual, the sound of the line makes Jisung wake up completely.

"See you later". he murmurs to himself.

+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*

The water is warm and reddens his skin. Jisung stands still and looks at the ceiling. For a moment he forgets what did happen up to that moment. For a second he is just Han Jisung, he is twenty-three years old, a law student who has two very good friends, a beautiful house and no problems. A normal guy. Everything looks so right inside that steamy cabin where everything exists in its proper place, perfectly set in every corner of his head.

However, when he slides the transparent door open, everything reverts to its disordered state and evaporates along with the drops of boiling water. Jisung absentmindedly observes the skin of his stomach. There are no marks left to testify the accident, and the IV holes are disappearing from his arms. Perhaps time will heal his thoughts as well.

He takes a towel from the closet next to the shower and he vigorously rubs his hair and face. He has no idea about the conditions of his face, to tell the truth. He has not looked at himself for more than a week.

He places the spongy fabric on a shelf and he approaches the mirror. He crinkles his eyes and thousands of black dots appear in front of him, blurring his vision. He staggeringly leans against the sink and waits until he can see everything clearly again. The lights above the mirror are too bright, and Jisung quickly thinks he needs to replace them.

"I must look terrible". he murmurs to himself, laughing dryly.

"You do not".

A voice clearly resonates inside the room.

Jisung turns icy, motionless. A meaningless echo rumbles with the quick realization that someone is there.

Someone broke into.

Into his house. Into his bathroom.

Jisung breath quickens. He keeps his gaze on the sink, trying to figure out where that voice might be coming from.

No one has the keys to his apartment, he thinks disconnectedly. Only Chan knows where he hides them. But a break-in seems unreasonable to him. His apartment is on the 25th floor of a building which is under constant surveillance.

Then who, how, why

"Who are you?"

His voice gushes out rather controlled compared to the nuclear bomb that has just exploded inside his chest. Jisung barely straightens his back and, from the corner of his eyes, he looks behind him, searching for a shadow that would give him a hint of where the stranger is hiding.

"Look up".

The stranger's voice is calm, gentle. A simple observation.

Jisung straightens up a bit. The voice is not coming from behind, he is sure.

"Who are you?" he repeats.

This time his mask of fake strength cracks blatantly. He takes a fleeting glance at his hands and he is not surprised to find them shaking.

"Why don't you see it by yourself?"

Jisung's brain makes a space-time jump. He is no longer inside his bathroom, but in his parents' house. In the living room, to be exact. He is sixteen years old, with fairly long and neglected hair, and an uncertain smile on his face. His brother is sitting in front of him. He is talking to him.

"When you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation", he tells him, "and you can't make the right decision, you have to consider everything you see as a dream inside your imagination. A dream you are living as the protagonist. You think you don't know what is going to happen, but the only one who decides the fate of the ending is you. Even if you don't know it. Even if the events make no sense. You are the only master of your dream and the only director of your life. So, take a breath, open your eyes and observe. Don't get carried away by your emotions. Watch everything as if it doesn’t affect you personally. Because, at the end, it’s just a scene in the movie you are filming. Twists and turns are inevitable, but if you pay attention you will see that there are small discrepancies between the reels that you change. You just have to watch and breathe. Just that, Jisung. Watch and breathe".

Watch and breathe.

Jisung hears those words blowing in his ears. He lifts his head and, somewhere far away, he hears the ticking of water drops falling on the floor.

In front of him there is still the same mirror framing in perspective the bathroom where he is standing. Watching and breathing.

Jisung watches and breathes.

He watches the reflection of a fair body in front of him, a body with a small chest and narrow shoulders, eyes large and expressive, hair blonde, long and neat.

He breathes what must be liquid oxygen, because he feels it flowing differently inside his lungs, it cannot be just air.

He watches a pair of red lips, a small nose, and milky skin adorned with freckles. A face that almost seems to glow under the light of the bulb. He breathes sweat, and he feels as if it rests on his body in a veil, enveloping him completely.

He watches a shy smile, not bold or opinionated. A smile which is just overwhelmingly sweet.

He watches a face of a stranger he has never seen. And he breathes, breathes blood bubbling unsteadily under his enlarged veins.

The reflection in the mirror is not Jisung. The reflection in the mirror is everything Jisung is not. Because Jisung has a tan body, a broad chest and broad shoulders. Jisung has sharp, dull eyes, wet hair, and pale, wispy lips. His nose is bigger and his skin is dull despite of being damp from the shower. Jisung does not smile under the light bulb. Jisung has something that prevents him from pulling his facial muscles and curling his mouth. Jisung is naked in front of the mirror, yet he is wearing a mask. Jisung doesn’t shine, above all. He doesn’t shine.

The boy behind the mirror watches him and breathes. He watches him and breathes in a way that is the same of Jisung, but so much different that it almost hurts. So he reaches out his hand and rests it on the surface of the glass, as to reassure him.

And that’s when he speaks again, when his voice echoes inside that room, that Jisung knows that he is really what he will never be.

"I have always been here". he says.

Then all the lights turn off, or perhaps it’s Jisung himself that is turning off. He closes his eyes and it almost feels like an abomination because he was finally seeing a light.

The last image he sees it’s a hand on a glass in a bathroom, in a building, in a city whose name he cannot remember.

But that's okay.

Because Jisung believes him.

+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*

©️ jilixthinker, 2023. please do not copy, translate, or republish my works anywhere.

[fullstcp]

JULIE AND THE PHANTOMS SENTENCE STARTERS

NOW OR NEVER

"Clocks move forward but we don't get older."

"All the times we fell behind were just the keys to paradise."

"Don't look down."

"We're still rising up right now."

"Keep dreaming like we'll live forever."

"Live it like it's now or never."

"I hear this noise, in my head."

"It's calling out like a voice I can't forget."

"Got no time to catch my breath."

"Clocks move faster cause it's all we're after now."

"We ain't searching for tomorrow."

"We've got all we need today."

WAKE UP

"Here's the one thing I want you to know."

"You got someplace to go."

"Life's a test, yes, but you go toe-to-toe."

"You don't give up, no, you grow."

"You use your pain cause it makes you you."

"I know it's not the same."

"You got living to do and I just want you to do it."

"So get up, get out, relight that spark."

"It's not what you lost, it's what you'll gain."

"Wake up your dream and make it true."

"Time to come out of the dark."

"Better wake those demons, just look them in the eye."

"No reason not to try."

"Life can be a mess."

"I won't let it cloud my mind."

"I use the pain cause it's part of me."

"I'm ready to power through it."

"I wanna hear it."

"No need to fear it, you're not alone."

"You're gonna find your way."

BRIGHT

"I wanna cry."

"I'm callin' out for one more try to feel alive."

"When I feel lost and alone, I know that I can make it home."

"Life is a risk but I will take it."

"Together, I think that we can make it."

"Come on, let's run."

"I found the ground I'm marching on."

"We will fight to shine together."

THIS BAND IS BACK

"Can you hear me?"

"We gotta get ready."

"This band is back."

WOW

"We're the best, no doubt."

"We see it, we want it, we get it, we got it."

"We came to play, where you at?"

"Come follow me."

"We're gonna make history."

FLYING SOLO

"You know all my secrets."

"Guess that means some things they never change."

"When I look at you it's like I'm looking at me."

"My life would be real low, zero, flying solo without you."

"You know who I'm liking way before I like them."

"If somebody hurts you I'm gonna get hurt too."

"That's just how we work."

"It will never change."

I GOT THE MUSIC

"Ain't gonna fight it cause it's useless."

"Don't care if everybody's watching."

"Silence ain't an option."

"We're on top of the world."

THE OTHER SIDE OF HOLLYWOOD

"Let me introduce myself."

"We've got some time to kill."

"Consider me the pearly gates to your new favorite thrill."

"We could go make history or you could rest in peace."

"Here there ain't no misery."

"Whatcha gonna do?"

"Show you a thing."

"You ain't seen nothing."

"Everything has got a price but happiness is free."

"We can set the night on fire and break out of the scene."

"It ain't bragging if it's true."

ALL EYES ON ME

"Whenever I walk in the room, all the focus on me."

"Not trying to brag, but I'm flawless."

"Ain't perfect, but I can't miss."

"The party don't start 'til I walk in."

"I'm stealing all the attention."

"Some might say I sound conceited."

"Some get jealous, they can't help it."

"They wish they were me."

"I keep the party going all night."

"I only lead, I never follow."

"I never open 'cause it's my show."

"Don't know if people think I'm shallow."

"All I see is all eyes on me."

"I'm my own goals, just talking honestly."

"Ain't no one as hot as me."

FINALLY FREE

"We're no liars."

"We say what we wanna say."

"Don't know if I'll make it 'cause I'm falling under."

"You're a part of me."

"Now till eternity."

"Been so long and now we're finally free."

"Now we know what we're worth."

"We know we can make it."

"We're not falling down under."

PERFECT HARMONY

"Step into my world."

"Life can be so mean."

"But when he/she/they go(es), I know he/she/they do(es)n't leave."

"The truth is finally breaking through."

"Two worlds collide when I'm with you."

"You set me free."

"You and me together is more than chemistry."

"Love me as I am."

"We say we're friends."

"We play pretend."

"You're more to me."

"We're everything."

"You are my brightest burning star."

"I never knew a love so real."

"We're heaven on earth, melody and words."

"When we're together we're in perfect harmony."

"We create a perfect harmony."

EDGE OF GREAT

"Running from the past. Tripping on the now."

"What is lost can be found."

"It's obvious."

"We all got a second act, inside of us."

"I believe that we're just one dream away from who we're meant to be."

"Our best days are yet unknown."

"This is moment is ours to own."

"We're standing on the edge of great."

"We all make mistakes."

"Sometimes we gotta lean on someone else."

"Be who you are no compromise."

"What doesn't kill you makes you feel alive."

UNSAID EMILY

"We start the scene in reverse."

"When things got loud, one of us running out."

"I should've turned around, but I had too much pride."

"No time for goodbyes."

"Didn't get to apologize."

"If I could take us back, if I could just do that."

"Then maybe time would not erase me."

"If you could only know I never let you go."

"The words I most regret are the ones I never meant to leave unsaid."

"Who'd be the first to break?"

"Guess we're alike that way."

YOU GOT NOTHING TO LOSE

"You know you wanna take a chance and be a little bit bad."

"Ain't nothing quite like living on the edge."

"I'm chasing down a thrill and looking fit to kill."

"You got nothing to lose."

"Welcome to my stage."

"Life's short, not a minute to waste."

"I'll take you higher than you've ever been."

"Tell me how you'd like to begin."

STAND TALL

"Don't blink."

"I don't wanna miss it."

"It's back to the beginning."

"Everything is rushing in fast."

"Keep going on, never look back."

"I'm going out of my mind."

"Whatever happens, even if I'm the last standing, I'ma stand tall."

"I gotta keep on dreaming."

"I gotta catch that feeling."

"Right now, I'm loving every minute."

"Can't let myself forget it."

"Cause everything is rushing in fast."

"I keep on going when it's all falling apart."

"I know with all my heart."

[snakegorl212006]

Chapter 1 pt 1

I stood upon a plane black as night. Within the blackened void stood a pair of evil's eyes full with malisse. The being roared as a golden light stood behind me. Before I could figure out who it was, I stood back in Ninjago city.

"This one bedroom one half bath is a cozy dream" the realtor said as she showed us around "who needs extras when everything is at arms reach" she continued "this looks uh.. Promising” Cole committed. I slightly sighed as I stood in the hallway "you look tired" Lloyd said "you guessed right. Defeating the Devourer who happens to be your mom leaves your brain in shambles" I replied "then you should rest! Every ninja should get proper sleep" Lloyd suggested "a ninja?" I questioned "ya, you're one of us now. A ninja and a hero" Lloyd answered I smiled. The realtor lured us to a much greater suit which had eight bedrooms. The only reason why we got it is because of the training facility. After that the ninja got day jobs and were out most of the day. The following week I was helping Lloyd by holding the punching bag. The ninja came in and all I heard was their complaints over their jobs. I sighed and headed over and looked at the jar. They're barely halfway there. "Um. Do you need anything like some extra cash"  I asked. "We'll be ok. I'll be working overtime and doing our parts. You should be training with Lloyd but can you fetch me some more ice" Cole asked and I nodded, slithering away to get more ice. The next day arrives and the ninja are off to work. I made us some.lunch for Lloyd and I. Then I heard the TV turn on so I peaked though to see Lloyd playing a video game. He groans in disappointment. I made him Ramen and I got myself a sandwich, then I made my way over to him and sat down to watch him play. I relaxed after giving him his food. As he played I saw something on the screen 'skales' I thought. Assuming Lloyd saw the same thing as he turned to the window and gasped. Without a second thought I pressed numbers on the pad as Lloyd is trying to open the door by force. I heard a breaking of glass and I turned around to see that scales had successfully infuriated the room. "What do you want with me?" Lloyd asked "You seem to be the only thing your father cares about. But with you as my hostage he'll have no choice but to let me lead the Serpentine" scales explained as he grew closer. I pulled out a knife I snagged from the kitchen but he still grows closer "let's train" scales said. "Hello what's going on in there" Wu called which gave me a perfect opportunity to attack Skales. He hissed at my advice and attacks back but I dodge and, using my tail,end up throwing him out the same window he came in. I sighed as Wu and Nya entered "Angela !" Lloyd called as he came to my aid "are you alright" he asked "ya.. just a bit winded. I'm never gonna attempt a flip again" I said as I flopped on my back "and my tail hurts" I mumbled ,resting my eyes then ending up taking a nap. I wake up in the back of a truck as the ninja was moving things inside a building. I'm guessing they moved out of the other place because of what happened "good evening Angeal, how was your rest" zane asked "better I'm just a little bit sore but I'm fine" i replied brushing my back. I sat up and stretch "i just need some food in my belly then I'm good" i said as i slithered off the truck to assist in transporting my things.

[justagamerandaweeb]

Welp, I guess I'm doing this.

Hi, my names justagamerandaweeb, or TheWritingWeeb, or King, or whatever the fuck you wanna call me, it doesn't matter, and welcome to my blog. It's clearly nothing special, as you can see, but it's whatever honestly.

My birthday is January 21st, I'm 18, and I'm just a guy trying to get through this Tumblr bullshit.

About me:

All you need to know about me is that I'm antisocial, both IRL, and on the internet. I don't really talk to people that I know IRL as I don't think they're interested in me. That, and I'm to scared to talk to anyone, period.

And as for online, I think it's a waste of time (If you make random arguments that you are entitled to on the internet against people you've have never seen before in real life, you are a fucking loser that has nothing better to do with your life).

I consider myself as talentless. Outside of this writing shit (4 years into the game), I have no talents at all. I mean, I have a guitar, I can only play a few notes, but outside of that, I don't amount to anything in the real world, hence why I'm here (and you could say the same right? Unless you got a job or a career that means something).

I mostly write for entertainment, not to make friends, but lets see if you guys can change that (if you even take the time to acknowledge me).

What I like:

Friends, food, video games, music, YouTube, writing, having fun when I have the opportunity, and I think that's about it.

What I don't like:

People who treat their loved ones like shit, jealousy, hate, fear, the pain of loss, losing someone or something you love, people who push their friends and family under the bus to reach some sort of status, and that's about it as well.

Rules:

Do not insult me, do not come after me for whatever reason I did, do not come after my friend(s), and do not request me to do grotesque things if I don't feel comfortable writing about it.

What I can do:

If and when I have the gumption to open my requests, here are the things I can write:

Vanilla, BDSM, Threesome (MMF, FFM, MMM, FFF), AU's, pegging, maybe HC's, SFW content, maybe a little bit of dead dove: do not eat (only gore though), and maybe some other stuff I can't name.

What I won't do:

The content that I will not contain the following: Lolicon, Shotacon, futanari, scat, watersports/Golden Shower, rape, necrophilia, zoophilia, anal and vaginal stuffing (putting random objects in the female genitalia and anus), bug play, urethral insertion, earfucking, and anything that I am dissatisfied writing.

Masterlist of characters:

Yoriichi Tsugikuni:

Mating Season

Michikatsu Tsugikuni/Kokushibo:

Warmth (Revamped)

Kyojuro Rengoku:

True love

Bonded Together Forever

Comfort Through Pleasure

A Message

Bromance

Senjuro Rengoku:

TLC (Tender, Loving Care)

Tengen Uzui:

A Message

"Fluffy Bunny..."

Tanjiro Kamado:

A New Experience

A new Experience (Revamped)

My Blossom...

Loss.

Giyuu Tomioka:

Sun-Kissed

Drunk Sex

Tiredness.

Iguro Obanai:

Sun-Kissed

Sanemi Shinazugawa:

Drunk Sex

Gentle

Akaza:

Filling

Bromace

Mitsuri Kanroji:

Different

Experiment

Kocho Shinobu:

Experiment

Muzan Kibutsuji:

Candle

Deflowered (Revamped) "Mine."

Lady Tamayo:

Worth

Sweet

Douma (I'm not making his name a rainbow):

Somnophilia

Filling

Enmu:

Somnophilia

Kaigaku:

I'm in Control

Gyutaro:

True Beauty

Peer Pressure

Aizetsu:

Hikikomori

Curiosity

Sekido:

Confliction

Miscellaneous:

Goku vs. Akaza

Wake up.

Redemption.

Spider-Man 2 pics

Ghost of Tsushima Pics

Nathan.

Brotherhood.

Love and Family.

Samuel.

Second Son.

Clean House.

Season 4:

EP 1

EP 2

Well, that's all there is to it. See you, I guess.

[kaerichan-yatta]

morning imma leave y'all this video and actually make a comeback!!

(LMAOOO I LOOK SO STUPID AND HIGH)

i've been going nuts lately. my mental state has deeply worsened and i feel like i'm in a situation that is far more complicated than i've ever imagined.

BUT let's not talk about it!! we have better things to discuss about :D haha!

HELLUVA??? BOSS?????

omg guys y'all have no idea how much those horny demons are affecting me rn (no i'm not talking about the latest episodes i'm talking generally and how i've basically turned into a whole different persona that switches on and off whenever someone mentions helluva or something that is possibly closely related)

(i haven't seen my therapist in 7 months due to economical problems and i've started gradually going insane to the point of being told i could be autistic or schizotypal [by friends who are already diagnosed. they know what they're talking about].)

also yes i've completely lost my persona so i don't actually care how you call me. either Kaeri, Kae, Onyx, Annie, Annabeth (complicated but funny how this new persona called "Annabeth" was born), bro, simp, girl, sharkie, whatever you want (i love sharks btw :3)

anyways aside from that, i've finally come to the point the thing i needed was a simple pause. a pause to get all my thoughts together and start from the top. so guess what? i didn't pass this school year. i failed and will have to repeat the third year of high school. which sounds like hell to me?? but on the other side i'm still proud of myself. there was a day i was forced to go to school despite staggering due to me being idiot and taking more pills than prescribed, and i thought that would be my final day. my classmates wouldn't stop staring at me when i had panic attacks in class and i eventually had to go to the toilet to throw up. but i made it! i came back home with horrible grades and tears running down my face, but i still could make it.

life is going way worse even without school. but at least i won't be forced to see my past classmates anymore.

aside from all those traumatic moments i'm literally jumping in joy rn cause i'm going to attend my first Pride ever with my bestie in Milan :3 and that's probably why i can't sleep properly and i keep waking up before my alarm.

i hope y'all are having a great time anyway, love y'all!!

-Kae