#I have no clue how he’s so buff

[indagold-orchid]

I know people say there aren’t technically alpha rats but this beefy boy demanded to be let out only to patrol my bed like a guard dog.

[libraryofgage]

Addams Family Steddie AU Part 3

Part One | Part Two

To preface, a bitch is sick rn so if you see any typos, no you didn't lol

"Robin, this is serious."

Steve can perfectly see Robin rolling her eyes through the phone as she says, "Oh, right, I'm so sorry your fiance-to-be is the perfect boyfriend who takes you on wonderful dates and romances you every single second you're together."

"I'm starting to think you're jealous."

"I'd only be jealous if Eddie had tits."

"He'd probably get some if I asked."

In the silence that follows, Steve can imagine Robin's scrunched face: her crinkled nose and curled lips and generally disgusted eyebrow furrow. He counts down from six in his head and then mouths along as Robin says, "I'd hang up if I weren't so invested in your love life."

"For someone so invested, you're not helping."

He hears a put-upon sigh through the speaker and returns it with a sigh of his own. Steve gives up on sitting properly and collapses back onto his bed, staring at the unmoving ceiling fan Hulyet is currently hanging from to nap.

"Fine, fine, what's the actual problem again?" Robin asks, her question followed by the sound of her shutting a book (one of her science textbooks based on the sound it makes when closing) so she can give Steve her full attention.

"Eddie is always planning our dates, and they're always really good, right? So I want to plan a date in return, but I have no clue how to plan something we'll both equally enjoy. In fact, I have no clue how Eddie plans our dates in the first place."

"Just start with something he likes and try to find something you'll like in it."

"Okay, say it again, but pretend I'm five."

Robin sighs again, and Steve hears the creaking of her bed as she collapses onto it. "Okay, the last date he planned, it was a hockey game, right?"

"Yeah."

"So, you like sports. Hockey is an obvious jump from there, but was Eddie also having fun at the game?"

Steve hums, reviewing their date from the week before. He hadn't expected Eddie to pull out hockey tickets, but he'd looked forward to it nonetheless. The game itself was fun, and the rink was cold enough that Steve had been able to scoot closer to Eddie and complain about being chilly.

Of course, Eddie's immediate response was to pull out a lighter, open it, and flick a flame to life while asking, "How big of a fire do you want, Stevie?"

For a brief moment, Steve had considered the question. But then he'd realized a fire would disrupt the hockey game, so they probably shouldn't start one.

After grabbing the lighter and stuffing it into his own pocket, Steve leaned closer and whispered, "Wouldn't you rather put your arm around me?" Eddie had lit up, and his smile was wide enough to make Steve feel blinded as he wrapped an arm around Steve's waist and pulled him closer.

It had been wonderful and romantic, right up until both of them got way too into the game and completely forgot about cuddling in favor of shouting at the players to hit harder and actually draw some blood to get the puck.

Steve smiles a little at the memory. "Yeah, he enjoyed the violence."

"Well, we all enjoy seeing buff people get a little bloody," Robin says, and Steve can see the way she's nodding like a wise man. "Anyway, he probably knew he'd enjoy the whole violence part of the sport. So, follow that formula."

"What formula are you seeing here?"

"Thing fiance-to-be likes plus a small part of it you could probably enjoy equals romance. If that's too hard, just get him a gift and plan the date around that."

Well, it sounds easy when she says it like that. "Why didn't I think of that?"

"Because I'm the genius here, obviously. Now go plan a date so you can tell me all about it later. And I expect details, Steven. Sordid details. If I'm not quivering in my bodice, what's the fucking point."

"You don't even have a bodice. And my name isn't Steven."

"I'll get one, and your name is whatever's comedically appropriate."

"I found a good website for bodices and corsets, actually. I can send it to you."

"What are you doing on that website, Steve?" Robin asks, her voice light and eager.

Steve smirks, pulling the phone away from his ear and saying, "Wouldn't you like to know," before quickly hanging up. The phone stays silent for three whole seconds before Robin immediately calls back, but Steve is too busy laughing to actually pick up.

Part of why the Munsons moved to Steve's neighborhood is the cemetery within walking distance. The cemetery is at the very back of the neighborhood, hidden from people who don't actually live there. The front of the cemetery is perfectly presentable. The gravestones are clean and new, and flowers decorate most graves while others hold pebbles and stones of various sizes and colors.

The back of the cemetery, however, is a Munson paradise. The grass gives way to brown, under-watered weeds and dirt, the faded gravestones are covered in moss and plants climbing them, and the trees are perpetually leafless and spindly to create the perfect horror movie atmosphere. It was like that even before the Munsons moved to the neighborhood, but Steve doesn't actually know why.

The back of the cemetery is where Steve leads Eddie, occasionally looking back to make sure the blindfold covering Eddie's eyes is still in place. "You know, I was expecting more than walking when you pulled out the blindfold," Eddie says, squeezing Steve's hand.

"We're almost there," Steve promises, looking around them until he spots the picnic blanket and pillows he'd laid down earlier in front of a blank gravestone. There's a small projector on the edge of the blanket, facing the wall of a mausoleum, with a DVD player connected to it.

Steve stops at the edge of the blanket, takes a deep breath, and moves to stand in front of Eddie. "Okay," he says, reaching up and carefully pulling off the blindfold.

When it comes off, Eddie looks straight at Steve, not sparing a glance at the set-up behind him. "Are you the surprise?" he asks, sliding his hands around Steve's hips and pulling him closer.

"I'm not much of a surprise," Steve points out.

"You're the best gift I could ask for," Eddie says, sealing the words with a kiss that would be too easy for Steve to get lost in.

And he almost does, but he pulls away before Eddie's tongue can get too far into his mouth. "No, wait, you haven't seen the actual surprise," he mumbles, putting a few inches between them and gesturing to the picnic blanket.

Eddie's eyes light up, and he pulls Steve to the blanket. He sits against the headstone and tugs Steve down next to him. "Movie date in a graveyard? Very romantic, sweetheart," Eddie says, leaning close and kissing Steve's jaw.

"Well, that's not the whole surprise," Steve replies, leaning his head on Eddie's shoulder. He hears a quiet hum from above him and adds, "This is our spot."

"What? Like a make-out spot? We gonna sneak out in the middle of the night to make out right here twice a week?"

"Only twice?" Steve asks, his voice teasing as he tilts his head back to see Eddie smile. He doesn't give Eddie the chance to answer, though. Instead, he takes Eddie's hand and plays with his engaged-to-be-engaged ring. "I mean, this is our spot. We're leaning on our gravestone."

A few seconds pass before Eddie seems to actually process the words. When he does, he straightens up, tugging Steve away from the gravestone with him so he can see it. "Is this...a couple's plot?" he asks, his eyes wide as he looks from the stone to Steve.

Steve flushes, heat rising in his cheeks as he looks away. He takes a deep breath, deciding to just verbalize his thought process when he'd bought the plot. "I figured, well, we wouldn't want to be apart even in death. So we'll be buried together, you know? Our corpses will be embracing as we rot for eternity, becoming skeletons and dust that will only know each other."

The words are followed by silence, making Steve wonder if he somehow fucked up with his gift. He braces himself and glances up at Eddie to ask if he doesn't like it only to be pushed back on the blanket. Steve blinks, his brain barely catching up as Eddie kisses him. This is, by far, the most desperate kiss Steve has ever received from Eddie. It's a kiss that's practically begging Steve to give Eddie permission to swallow him whole, tuck him securely into the marrow of his bones, and hold him there so they'll never be apart.

Steve is a little confused, but he's far more interested in kissing back, sliding his fingers into Eddie's hair and tugging playfully as he bites Eddie's tongue. A rough growl in response sends shivers down Steve's spine, goosebumps spreading across his arms as Eddie pushes his hands under Steve's shirt.

Surprisingly warm fingers trail across Steve's abdomen before Eddie's hands settle on his hips, his pinkies teasingly pushing past the waistband of his jeans. Steve sighs softly, relaxing at the familiar sensation as he hooks one of his legs over Eddie's waist, pulling him close until their hips and chests are flush against each other.

Eddie grins against Steve's lips, his left hand trailing down Steve's waist to rest on his thigh, holding it in place as he teasingly grinds their hips together. Steve jolts, a surprised, quiet moan escaping him as his hands start to tremble with adrenaline and...well, sheer horniness if he's being honest.

"Please tell me we can fuck on our future grave," Eddie says, his voice low and husky as he speaks against Steve's lips.

Steve groans, fully agreeable to the idea only to realize two very important things. One, he doesn't have any lube, and two, he was actually looking forward to watching movies with Eddie, which wouldn't really happen if they got too distracted. Plus, you know, the whole sex in public thing, but that's not as big of a deal. Who's going to be visiting the cemetery on a Wednesday?

But Steve doesn't want to completely dash Eddie's hopes and the sheer joy in his eyes at the idea, so he presses another kiss to his lips and promises, "Later, Eddie."

Despite his disappointed expression, Eddie doesn't argue. He just sits up, pulling Steve with him so he stays in his lap. "I'll hold you to that, sweetheart," he whispers, kissing down Steve's neck until he reaches the point where it meets his shoulder. He bites down there, causing Steve to inhale sharply as he licks and sucks a hickey onto his skin.

Steve shakily exhales, biting his bottom lip to keep himself grounded. When it feels like Eddie is about to start on another hickey, Steve uses his grip on his hair to pull him back. "Stevie," Eddie breathes, his eyes dark as he looks up at him, "you know what pulling does to me."

Steve snorts, kisses his cheek, and climbs off his lap. "Keep it in your pants for now, babe. I actually want to get to the other part of this date," he says, moving over to the projector.

"And what's that?" Eddie asks.

"Classic monster movies," Steve says, grinning at the excited gasp that comes from Eddie as he turns on the projector. Once it boots up, the mausoleum wall shows the opening menu for a Monster Movie Collection DVD. Steve puts on Frankenstein, making sure the movie actually starts and the opening credits begin rolling before climbing back into Eddie's lap.

"I love you so fucking much," Eddie says, wrapping his arms around Steve's waist and hugging him close as he rests his chin on Steve's shoulder.

Steve grins, leaning back against him and idly playing with one of the rings on Eddie's fingers. "I love you, too. Now shut up and watch the movie. No more making out until at least this one is over."

"Yes, sir."

Steve can't help a soft laugh. He takes Eddie's hand, raises it to his lips, and playfully bites his palm before lacing their fingers together and focusing on the movie.

Tag List: @estrellami-1, @justforthedead89, @starman-jpg, @abstractnaturaldisaster, @sugartin, @ashwagandalf, @xjessicafaithx, If anyone else wants to be tagged in potential future parts, just let me know!

[nofingjustaninchident]

jason grace general headcannons

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content: jason grace hcs

warnings: nothing!!

a/n: i’m back from the dead!!!! i know, i know that i just write for my boy, but trust im writing one of these for all of my boys. i just don’t know when im gonna post it. byeee

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He’s always losing his glasses, like 24/7. They just sleep in the nightstand and in the morning they’re not there anymore.

His love languages are acts of service and quality time, but he LOOOOVES physical touch.

He’s really good in english, but he has a little bit of trouble with maths (roman numbers and all)

He doesn’t understand gen-Z jokes

He has no clue on how to use a cellphone/computer/tv/anything technological

He loves to play football

He’s completely clueless about the people that have a crush on him. Like, he never ever notices.

He’s super romantic, but he’ll never ever admit it

He’s an ass guy. Prove me wrong.

He absolutely loves when you want to make cute hairstyles in his hair.

He’ll give you all of his hoodies

He smells like roses and sandalwood.

He wakes up at 4 am every day. The only days when he wakes up later is when he’s sleeping with his s/o

He’s a cuddler, and obviously the big spoon.

He’s not one to get into fights, but if someone says anything about his friends, he’ll kill that person.

He’s extremely loyal to his friends and family.

He’s super powerful, and, if he explores more of his powers, he’d discover that he can control the air in people’s lungs and he’d be terrifying.

He used to be very insecure with himself when he was younger, and that made him work out till he got all buff and hot and tall.

He loves laughing with Percy and Leo and just chilling together with his mates

He spends a lot of time with Frank helping him with all this praetor thing.

He and Reyna were never back to being close friends, and he got constantly sad over this.

He got constant anxiety crisis and panicked attacks

Sometimes he doesn’t realize how tall he is compared to other people like Nico, so it’s super fun to watch him smirking when he doesn’t want Nico to get something and he just puts it in a higher spot.

He’s the biggest Solangelo shipper in the whole damn camp.

He’s the president of the ‘Protect Nico Di-Angelo’ club.

He loves loves LOVES kids, and he’d be the best dad ever.

He loves when Percy calls him to go to Sally’s house, cause he can play with Estelle.

He hates when any of his friends get mistreated.

He doesn’t have much personal stuff in the Zeus cabin, but he does have a plushie, and it’s a little eagle that he named Sparkles.

He’s not much of a crier now, but he did cry a lot when he was a kid.

He loves sleepovers.

He’s a great cook, since Leo taught him.

He loves baking cakes for his friends and family

His favorite dessert is brownies, especially when it has that crunchy part in it.

He’s absolutely terrified of dentists.

He’s also a little claustrophobic.

He loves having an arm around you whenever you’re talking.

He’s not super jealous, but he’s a little insecure with some stuff or people.

He’s the softest boy of all. Literally the cutest ever.

[reiderwriter]

Hi I’m new to this so I’ve no clue if this is how you request, but I was thinking Spencer fluff, in earlier seasons where he’s a little bit more awkward but has a little bit of confidence, based on that one episode where hotch says Reid was propositioned by all the prostitutes & you’re dating him but you’re not the jealous type, they know what they have with Spencer is good and knows he worships the ground they walk on, so isn’t worried or threatened by anyone so while he’s getting hit on being a blabbering mess they just giggle to themselves making little suggestive comments. Hope this makes sense🥰

A/N: That's one of my favourite scenes because it's so hilarious to see Hotch cracking jokes for some reason. That and "did you join a boy band?" Iconic, truly. ❤️ Thank you for requesting, I'll shut up now.

Warnings: none

You were aware that Spencer Reid was a catch. Perfectly aware. More than aware. Desperately aware.

He was, quite possibly, the most attractive bean pole of a man that had ever walked the earth. He was beautiful and he was loving and his smile lit up the room and you were quite honoured to be able to call him your boyfriend.

It was not lost on you that many other people - not just women - also desired him. Which led to some downright hilarious instances.

“It's not funny, Y/N.” He pouted, that adorable furrow in his brow coming back and finding it's perfect place on his face as you stared up at him. You knew the expression you were showing him was a little bit dreamy, head in both hands as you gazed admiringly up at him, but you simply didn't care what kind of company you were in.

“Spencer, you were propositioned by 11 prostitutes.”

“I'm sure they were just teasing, Y/N. I'm awkward, I stand out like a sore thumb, I'm not buff or hot, I'm-”

“A complete and total liar!” You stood, gasping and grasping non existent pearls, playing up your disbelief. He cracked a smile and you paused briefly to send up a prayer to God, thanking them for putting a real angel on Earth.

“Spencer, you may be a little bit nerdy, and you absolutely do not know when to shut up. Your hair may always looks like your mom did it for school picture day, and your fashion sense is questionable to out it kindly-”

“Is there a but? I need there to be a but or I'll cry myself to sleep.”

“But those things are incredibly endearing. And did I mention you're really hot? It's like you're all members of the Scooby Doo cast rolled into one body and somehow that really works for me.” To punctuate your words, you took a step closer, letting your hand play with his tie as you slowly encouraged him to take a small step towards you as well, until you weren't sure where the heat that warmed you was coming from.

It could've been rolling off of him, or you, or it could've been a fire burning between you, as you fixed his tie and ran a hand through his hair.

“I'm not joking with you, Spencer. I love watching everyone appreciate your beauty and your intellect. Frankly, it turns me on.”

“Okay. I'll remember that, thank you.”

“Turns on the prostitutes, too.”

“Y/N! They're just trying to make a living, if you'd have been out there canvassing they'd have tried it with you too.” You had to giggle a bit at his loom of exasperation, flas to see that it was tainted with an uncontrollable smile, a small lifting at the corners of his mouth that he couldn't combat.

“Spencer Reid, Hotch told me that one of the girls offered you $100 for a ride.”

“That's not exactly cheap or a discount, Y/N, the going rate for a working girl in the area is-”

“Spencer. She was offering you money.” His brows knitted again and then his eyes widened in realisation.

“Oh. Oh, she did look very disappointed now that I think about it.” You pressed your hand to your mouth to suppress the small pleasurable giggles from slipping out and composed yourself, before slipping your arms around his waist.

“So, Spence. How is it that you know the going rate of a working girl?” You lifted your eyebrow and watched him panic, ready to memorise every expression that ever passed across his angelic features.

[shakirawastaken]

dsmp if... you were a romance trope

i got inspiration (sapnap, dream, george, karl, quackiy, wilbur) 

sapnap (hockey x figure skater): - im in the middle of heartbreaker rn and SHUT UP - i LOVE THIS TROPE - IM NOT EVEN A FIGURE SKATER I DO TAEKWONDO BUT I STILL FROTH OVER THIS SHIT - and then in addition to that one tommyinnit is a figure skater and everyone else is on a hockey team “ice these hurts” or smt h like that - i love this trope. - anyway i think that this trope comes hand in hand with enemies to lovers - his hockey team and ur figure skating group are at the same winter sports competiton - and you have to share a rink - booooo - so everyday you end practice with the sight of a bunch of hockey buffs roughhousing in the stands, waiting for you to finish - and everyday a certain brunette one sneers and smirks at you as you walk off the ice - “had a nice practice ice queen/king?” he asks you teasingly - “shut up, yeti” you mutter back gratingly as you bump your shoulder into his build as you pass him - and he comes up with a new one everyday - and you quip right back at him, unphased - one day, he comes into practice early just to spite you - what he wasn’t expecting is to see how good you actually were on the ice - he sat there like “ :O” and just watche dyou glide across the ice with what seemed like barely any effort - and he watched how passionate you were in your craft and the dance - and bro was whipped right then and there - so that day as you were leaving he said “you were amazing out there” and it took u jumpscared - you were like “no insult today?” - and he was like “dang, didnt know u liked them that much ;) but not today, not for something as beautiful as that” - and i think you can guess where it went from there... :)

 dream (ceo and employee romance):  - AKAIAKAKAHAKH TELL ME YOU SEE THE VISION - i mean hes a ceo alr so its like one step in the door you know - anyway hes a ceo - bro wears those fancy ass suits everyday and has like a wine cellar mini fridge shit thing in his office  - any way you pull up to his headquarters one day for like an interview and you were so fucking nervous  - you ran into him in the elevator (and no clue who he was) - and you basically vented to him for the 30 second elevator ride before scurrying off to your interview - bro didnt even get dreams name or anything - he kinda just smiled and wished you well as you ran away  - he thought you were so cute  - and you thought dude was hot as fuck  - anyway you got the JOB!! LETS GOO - the next day, your supervisor is like taking u around showing u the works - ....and you meet the ceo - its dream - and youre like :0 and he’s like  *smirk wink* ;) “hey” - and youre like “well fuck hes the ceo i cant be in love with him” - and you avoid him - but he makes it his life’s mission to get on ur radar - in the break room, in ur cubicle, in the cafeteria, in the parking lot man is ON YOU LIKE A MOTH TO A LIGHT - eventually he convinces you to go to fancy dinner - and WOW hes paying?? so that shit was FIREEEE - fancy wagyu steak and 102379182 year old wine i mean cmon - it was good ok - he asks you out after dinner and assures u ur job wont be at risk and everything - ba da bing ba da boom  - now youre dating happily and he spoils the FUCK outta you  - lmk if you want this one as a big fic with dialogue

george (neighbors): - tell me why whenever i have my delulu daydreams with george he’s always a neighbor - very much boy next door vibes - omg HES YOUR COLLEGE ROOMMATE NEXT DOOR - stoppppp - on move in day he pulls up with his family and u with urs and youre like - “hi ! nice to meet you im so exicted to move in!” and bros like “same!” - sometimes hes loud bc hes talking to his friends but you dont mind - hes a cs major and ur  whatever u want major - one day you decided to start singing  rlly loud while cleaning - ur singing taylor swift - and then george could hear you from the room next door to yours - so he writes up a little post it note that was like “loved the concert! when’s the next one?” and stuck in on your door - you found it and started mad blushign - you had a crush on him since day one awwww - anyways you two started communicating via post it notes and songs played loudly through the walls <3 - till one day you hear boyfriend by big time rush - and then you play girlfriend by avril lavigne back - and then he slips you a post it note under the door and you open the door before you could read it  - and its an unspoken like thing that you start dating - its so romantic how you can saw you guys starting dating because of taylor swift !!

quackity (academic rivals): - DO NOT GET ME STARTED ON THIS TROPE IT BRINGS ME LIFE ALRIGHT - alright - two law school students FIGHTING IT OUT ACADEMICALLY - you guys met in ur freshman year english class or some shit - clashed together in a discussion group - and its been game on since then - your texts with each other are flaunting texts - “hey alex, guess who got a 97 on the last midterm?” - “guess who got a 99 ;)” - over time, the texts started getting more and more hostile - people started to thing you two actually hated one another’s guts  - but in reality it was more for the thrill - but this continued throughout your law school careers - and you both become successful lawyers in the end!! - and when the headmaster calls you both into his office and says - “youre both valedictorian! congrats! you have to give a speech together” - well its like all the hatred faded away - you grinned and cheezed at each other before giving each other the biggest hug ever - so you both wrote a speech together - and soon the day of graduation came - and q goes at the end “i wouldn’t be here without the person who motivated me through it all, so thank you (y/n)” and youre like “hey man *sob* wtf *sob” - and you kiss him on the cheek and cheer to all the graduates  - after the ceremony he catches up to you in the parking lot, grabbing your wrist before you could go off with ur family - and blurts out word soup - and ur like what - and hes like “i really like you, and law school wouldn’t have been the same without you. can we be more than friends?” - and youre like “duhhh” and kiss him right there karl (best friends to lovers): - YOU ARE IN LOVE BY TAYLOR SWIFT  - that is the song for this SCENARIO - you two met when you were little kids in like first grade - your friends werent there on that day so you hung out with each other - hooked to the other since then and there - it was always “karl and you” and “you and karl” - you came as a packaged deal - through ups and downs you were there together - you graduated high school together and were going to the same college together now - while karl barely got into any romantic relationships, you seemed to be going through a few of them  - you were desperate for a love connection and honestly i aint blaming u - one day after a horrible date he came over to your dorm and u had an impromptu sleepover - you were in karls old shirt and some pajama pants and he was in his pajamas - and you two were just watching a movie together - before he turns to you abruptly, and you turn to look at him - and he’s like “you’re my best friend”  - and you saw a switch flip in him - since then, the dynamic between you two changed (for the better) - you became more flirty more touchy  - you started to act like you were a couple more and more - one day you saw him open his wallet to pull out his card  - and u saw that he has a picture of the two of you in his wallet - and then you knew that he was it for you - you ask him out that night - and hes so happy hes picking you up and spinning you around - <3 wilbur (musician x fan trope): - okay this is inspired by those tik toks that are like “did you see the way he looked at me” and its harry styles staring and eyeing down a fan in the audience like YES - and he’s a musician so it fits! - imagine lovejoy is like a HUGE HUGE Band so maybe this is in the future - anyways you and ur friend go to a lovejoy concert - for the sake of the story, youre not that big a fan of lovejoy just familiar with hits like sex sells and one day - the whole time ur friend is like “theyre so good hes so good its all so good” - you two end up a few rows from barricade  - and you and ur friend start screaming it up as you should - youre not oblivious to the way the lead singer keeps looking over in your direction, winking and smiling - imagine a sweaty, singing wilbur glancing over at you during sex sells and giving you a smile as he rasps out “you know sex sells i know that” - brb ascending to heaven - anyway a time comes when he stops to speak to the audience - he wastes no time - he struts over to your side of the stage and points at you  - “what’s your name?” - and you scream it at him - “what a lovely name!” - the crowd cheers - “ahre you single?” he asks with a grin on his face - the grin grows when u nod at him - “give me ur number!?” he asks and you nod at him as ur friend is dying next to you - he gestures u and ur friend to the front of the stage by the barricade  - and he passes you a marker and make syou WRITE YOUR NUMBER ON HIS GUITAR OR HIS SHIRT OR SOMETHING - oh yeahh go you go you thank yoU! let me know if you want any of these to become a bigger story/imagine and LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT A PART 2 WITH OTHER PEOPLE :D reblogs appreciated

[ozzgin]

I can't get your yakuza headcanons out of my mind, Daitou's got me in a chokehold and I'm not complaining, like--

in regards to that doodle you made to show height difference between reader and the boys [I love your art btw (●♡∀♡)] - I can't picture myself in reader's style, I'm currently going through my goth phase in my 20s lmao; picture a big bitch with tattoos and messy hair who's listening to nothing but 2000s hits and screamo bands - so I'd like to request a headcanon of how Daitou would react to a gender-neutral reader like this :D I also like to incorporate the idea of them once being in a famous band that he's a fan of! (sorry if this seems like a lot, I have a huge imagination hehe)

but if he's more into the cute and helpless type, I'll just walk my ass out the door and yeehaw my way into another yandere's arms ✌😔

That's on me for not drawing the reader inserts as cartoonish cinder blocks :') In truth I'm a little bit embarrassed seeing how many likes that doodle has gotten, it was something I put together in a hurry and the clothing was meant to be baggy, shapeless, with not too many folds for the sake of simplicity. I myself am more of a pilgrim goth, just to emphasize the randomness of the choice.

Drawing reader inserts always leaves me a little anxious. If I use a light shade of gray, will people think I'm excluding poc? Will plus sized readers feel like they've been disregarded? What about masculine readers? As someone who's demiromantic I always struggle taking appearance or gender into consideration, because to me it has no influence whatsoever. Which is hard to express when you want to offer blank slate visuals as an extra to the story.

What I'm trying to say is that all of my characters would like you for who you are. Sure, they find your looks cute, but it's not the defining reason. Maybe you have similar traits to them, maybe you're the complete opposite and they find it intriguing. You could be a buff man and Daitou would be just as grateful to have someone who isn't afraid of him. I usually stick to a female reader for bigger stories to avoid messing it up long term, but in the grand scheme of things it makes no difference. I always imagine reader to be a shapeless blob that provides the dialogue I need for the story mood. There's no concrete preference or type for any of my OCs. I mean, ideally you'd like them back and not hang them upside down above a BBQ pit but I feel these are sensible requirements (?).

And now for the actual headcanons since my ramble is over.

First encounter is comically awkward but for reasons you’re unaware of yet. You’re obviously used to people staring at you (more so in a country like Japan), so you were expecting the curious glance every now and then. On the other hand, being under scrutiny, from a man even more unusual looking than you at that, is odd. Mildly uncomfortable. You’re shifting yourself from one leg to another, hoping to be done with the introductions soon.

On his end, Daitou is anxiously fidgeting and trying his best to focus. He’s seen this face before and he can’t shake off the familiar feeling. Where the hell…He obviously can’t downright gawk at you, and he isn’t sure how to politely formulate a question. After several sheepish peeks, it finally dawns on him: weren’t you part of that band he really likes? No, what would the chances be? Then again, how many people out there would look exactly like you? Is it rude to ask? He has no idea. He resumes his mumbled description of the apartment and hands you the papers to be signed.

Back at his place, he finally digs through his merch and sprawls out the available clues. “I didn’t know you were into this kind of music”, Kazuya comments as he looks over the man’s shoulder. He’d come over to ask about the new tenant. “I’m pretty sure it’s them.” He concludes, confidently placing his index over a CD cover. “Huh? Who? The tenant?” Kazuya holds back his chuckle. “Why would a celebrity show up for a shady apartment offer? You’re tripping, man.”

“I’m sorry, this is getting ridiculous.” You finally exclaim, annoyed by the persistent stares of the now two men facing you. You’re standing in front of the apartment building, arms crossed, huffing at the tall scarred man and his blonde friend. “No, I’m sure of it. Even the tattoo is the same.” Daitou turns to whisper to Kazuya, oblivious to your complaints. In turn, Kazuya lightly elbows him, mouthing something about being rude. “Just ask them, man.” He adds, this time louder. “Ask me what??” You groan. “W-were you…um…in this band by any chance?” Daitou manages to blurt out, searching his pocket for the CD case and ceremoniously laying it under your eyes.

Ah. It finally clicks and you exhale, relieved. You confirm their suspicions and show them some backstage photos to solidify your claim. You ask Daitou if he wants an autograph or something, then swiftly scribble your signature on a piece of paper and hand it out to him. He holds it with a wide, childish grin. “You’re a weird one, you know? You could’ve just asked. I guess I didn’t expect to find a fan in the wild, especially here.” Daitou carefully folds the souvenir, eyes lidded with nostalgia. “Oh yes, it’s great. Drowns out the screams.”

[alphajocklover]

Hey! Sorry to bother you but I have a problem. You see, I was walking alone in the street when someone ran into me. I didn't see him and he seemed really annoyed i bumped into him. He started screaming at me and saying things like, you dumb boy. You think you can walk around like you owned the streets. You are nothing. You don't deserve free will... And a lot of other things as he ketp running away. Only thing is, he didn't grabbed back his phone and as I grabbed it to give it to him, he was nowhere to be found. NOw i'm home with his phone and i don't know what to do. I feel weird and my legs are getting sore. What is happening to me? You have any idea how I could give him back his phone?

So this random guy you don’t even know, who got super aggressive with you over a tiny accident and basically called you worthless and less than human, dropped his phone before storming off… and despite everything he said, you want to find him and bring back his phone? You are a very kind person… or maybe a really naive one.

Him walking into you wasn’t really an accident. He did it on purpose, just like how he dropped his phone on purpose. He's been planning this for quite some time, and he decided that today was the day to strike. Today he’s going to turn you into a horny jock. It’s not too late though. You can avoid your fate… if you can figure out how he’s doing it.

Because I’ll be honest, I have no fucking clue how he’s going to transform you.

I know it has something to do with that phone, so obviously my first thought was that InstaJock was involved somehow. But… why wouldn’t he have just sent you an invite then? Why use his own phone? With how the app works I don’t even think you can get transformed using another persons phone. Maybe he put some hypnosis tracks on the phone and he’s banking on you listening to them? Or maybe he got a nerd to make it so his phone spews jockifying gas if you open it? Neither of those seem right either though…

Maybe the phone was a red herring? Something to distract you from the actual transformation method until it was too late? Could it have been the jock himself? He did touch you after all, and the entire ‘taking your free will thing’ kind of suggest he’s an Alpha. But… Alphas aren’t usually that aggressive with potential betas. They have no reason to be. They know they’re better than everyone else, they don’t have to pick fights to prove it to anyone. And Alphas usually don’t resort to cheap tricks like decoy phones. Sometimes they like to mix up how they transform betas but usually they just let their sheer dominance do its job. So he’s probably not an Alpha. Maybe it has nothing to do with the jock? Maybe running into him was a coincidence and the real reason you’re changing is… you.

When you saw that guy, so huge, buff, aggressive and manly, maybe a part of you realized how deeply you want to be like that. How sick you are of being weak, of being small, of being so nice. Maybe it woke something up inside you, and now some sort of inner force is changing you into who you really wanna be: an absolute stud. A fucking man. I could be wrong. It’s rare for someone to spontaneously turn into a jock, without a specific transformation method or catalyst. But… it does happen. Very rarely, a regular geek will just… transform. It’s always possible there’s a reason for it that we haven’t discovered yet, but until we do we just have to accept that some guys are going to randomly change. And it looks like you’re one of the lucky few.

Don’t fight it. There’s no way to prevent or reverse the transformation anyways. Can’t reverse it if we don’t know what caused it after all. So, if you’re going to change anyways, why not enjoy it? Enjoy the feeling of your muscles slowly growing, starting with your legs and traveling up your body, through your abs, across your chest and down your arms. Enjoy as your mind starts to dim and you brain is filled with thoughts of working out, playing sports, having sex and gaming with your bros. It’s not like you’ll be entirely gone. You’re still you, just slightly different. You’ll still be a very kind, very naive person. Possibly even more so. Jocks like you aren’t exactly known for being smart, and everyone loves a kind, beefy himbo.

Considering what I've seen so far, I bet that’s exactly how you’ll end up. A cool, buff, manly guy that could belong at a football game or a pizza party. You’ll be popular with everyone, even the nerds and especially the babes. So go and enjoy the life of a himbo jock. I know I would!

**hey everyone! Just wanted to say hi and thank Axeeglitter for his prompt. I hope it’s what he wanted. I feel a little weird using an actor as a picture in one of my stories (Cody Christian is the hot guy at the bottom) but Axeeglitter and I dmed a little and he mentioned Cody Christian is a favorite of his. Hope you guys enjoy, and if you ever have something specific in mind for a story you can’t communicate through an ask, don’t hesitate to dm me!**

[1-800-deactivatednearu]

woag character design notes

[i.d.: a drawn line up of the half life vr ai characters, from left to right, gordon, dr. coomer, tommy, bubby, gman, and benrey. /end i.d.]

yeah i skipped some guys , i dont draw some of them enough to have much unique designs and some of them are a png of a dog

trust me i am just surprised as the rest of yall that i am doing hlvrai art . design notes below (very long, mind your step)

gordon:

wow this guy dont got no head

i didnt want to give gordon a face because of how unexact the person is as the fandom engages with it. is it wayne rtvs? (well as presented to an audience, yes) is it gordon freeman? (well as seen from an in game perspective, yes) is it a whole new guy entirely? (well as

i cut the confusion and took it a whole new direction: guillotine

hlvrai being treated as a very broken game is fun to me as a design perspective, so if you (the audience) are not supposed to see his face, what happens when you see it anyways? missing texture time

there are eyes drawn over because i did not have confidence in my expressions at first and then it grew on me

i think if i were to draw (and i have drawn) an actual person under the mask i would still censor the eyes because that is where the vr headset sits!!

(i do not like putting an actual flesh to gordon though)

though i really like seeing how other people interpret gordon hlvrai it is not . my gordon ? we are talking about the same guy . but this is my gordo . i made this one . this guy my guy . maybe i should draw other gordon designs

i can draw the hev suit from memory and it is also the entire reason why i can render metal confidently

i liked how people changed the lambda to read ai :] i also have no clue if i wrote the lambda correctly

(i did, i just checked)

dr coomer:

as much as i draw/drew him i find it more fun to not stick to one set design :)

so a lot of my takes on dr coomer tend to jump from idea to idea, especially from what other people are doing, though they could be fitted to the left and right designs!

the left design is mainly based off what i saw in fandom spaces

we see rounder shapes, making for a more friendly and welcoming appearance

i think of this as straying from the more professional uniform of the actual scientist models

enter swimming shorts and bright yellow socks, for some reason

so now he kind of looks like a cool science teacher :)

it might be the lab coat

the right design is mainly based off thumbnails for hlvrai itself

these use a more angular appearance

i want to push how comically buff he is because of strength he shows at times, especially since his left design seems to completely down play it as a comically not buff man who is still very strong

the shadows on right design coomer get so much more harsh and exaggerated because i have comic books on the mind :)

he really does look like a dehydrated comic book character huh

tommy:

stick bug (he gets it from his dad) (this thought process is explained at gman section)

i pushed a lot of the saturation of colours in her design because i think tommy gets to be a little silly with it

fun art story of the day! when you color, try messing with hue! you might notice you can get away with a lot as long as your values are about right

i like pushing this with white because you can get away with a lot of things reading as “off white”

old faithful for me is cool shadows with a warm transition colour to keep things visually interesting

i keep making white objects the trans flag

happy pride

tommys design looks a little like a school boy, with the tucked in button up shirt+suspenders+shorts+jacket tied around the waist . and the primary colours . but like it is really fun to dress up so brightly

i actually was strongly inspired by medieval babies if that is a weird descriptor? i wanted him to both be a middle aged man but also a young adult

do not be like tommy, who has their finger on the trigger of the gun while not even looking at where it is pointing and good god he is squeezing the trigger . top ten firearm safety of all time

bubby:

the absurd part is that i think bubby is tall . he is just between tommy and gman who are exaggeratedly lanky .

i wanted to make bubby a pointy kinda guy, so he is the only one actually wearing the lab coat proper . and the only one actually wearing dress socks but not even wearing dress shoes

i wanted to give him a novelty tie but i was running low on ideas and running high on boreds so we dont get a tie

he does have crocs though!! in attack mode!!

i do think we all kind of saw his model and collectively decided it works for him because i have honestly not seen major divergences from his model?

gman:

stick bug

i wanted to stress the more spooky and unknowable nature of him and took it in the dark souls direction of “make bigger than player character”

maked too bigger

he cannot walk through any doorways but you will have to crane your neck to look up at him

in the opposite direction of tommy, i pulled a lot of the saturation in gmans design

it feels important to make them both not fully match the rest of the slightly less broken npcs because there was so much work to make them look cool so i have to respect that

actually a lot of gmans and tommys designs are made in opposite to one another

gman has a largely stationary face and very stiff line work

while tommy is pushed to expressive as possible

thats pretty fun, way to go me

benrey:

benrey also has two designs

and in both of these i keep getting too lazy to use a reference so  the vests are super plain (forgetting the badge and black mesa logo) . i think the helmet is supposed to be darker actually .

the design ethos of benrey was “built like a brick shithouse”

a friend of mine took this cooler and interpreted it as a shield/wall/barrier as a physical (and narrative) obstacle

again the first uses fandom designs

most notably the overcast shadow (seen in video thumbnails but i never noticed it or understood why so many people did it until someone pointed it out to me)

i think hlvrai is such a great medium because it acknowledges it is a game and is able to play into that to great effect! i think the shadow is fun to imagine as solid black as a small reminder of the impossibility of the space :]

benrey is a smug cat in the body of a human . to be honest . and this is the full range of emotion i have ever drawn him with

the second was mostly because as fun as taking creative liberties are, i just really wanted to see benrey as is: the half life security guard model in all its slight wonk :]

i actually do prefer this design . it is a little more uncanny because i choose the worst translations of the model . i like it because it is a little more uncanny !

that can be said for like . every single design in this line up huh .

[leeyanyanyaaan]

Sett x Craft Store Owner!Reader

28 / 11 / 2023

hiya!! welcome to part two of my heartsteel x reader "creatively charmed" series!!! again, i know that name needs workshopping LMAO. i actually wrote sett's part around the same time as i did w kayn's and that's how i came up w the idea to make it a whole series w all of the characters :D unfortunately, i have to go on hiatus so there wont be any updates for a while :( nonetheless i hope you enjoy ^^

It all started when Sett's mom asked him to run an errand for her and grab some yarn from her usual craft store

That happened to be run by your family. 

As you can probably expect, love and skill of the arts and crafts run in the family. For one of your parents, it was needlework and fashion, for your other parent, it was the more practical hands-on crafting; as their child that grew up learning them all, you were a jack of all trades.

Anyways, Sett happily obliged, heading to your store to buy what she needed, but realized upon entering that he had no clue what he was supposed to look for, despite the list giving him the specific yarns she was looking for

Your parents were temporarily out of town, so it was only you manning the store. When you notice his presence, you welcome him. Sett lights up and approaches you for assistance, which you gladly do

Once he got what he needed the two of you make your way to the cash register. You decide to start a conversation by complimenting his beanie and the craftsmanship of it

Sett grins and proudly declares that his mom made it for him, his ears twitching from underneath

Your eyes widen in realization, and ask him whether his mom was the regular vastayan customer you were thinking of, to which he visibly gets excited about and eagerly confirms. You smile, thinking how cute the buff man's love for his mother is, and continue talking about how you enjoy seeing her as a regular customer in the store

This conversation lasts for quite a while until Sett's mom calls him asking about his shopping, reminding him that he was still in the middle of an errand. He sheepishly tells her that he'll be right over with everything she asked for

When the call ends, you hand him his mom's reusable totebag that held all the purchases as he thanks you for your help. Before he runs out the store, he tells you his name and asks for yours, which of course you were happy to tell :)

From here on out, expect Sett's visits to be more frequent. He asked his mom to call him if she ever needed anything more from the craft store… and then eventually, just asked to do any errand for her in general. He wasn't subtle about wanting a reason to see you, but I mean hey, he does something to help his mom and gets to talk to you at the same time? A definite win-win for him

Also, yes, his mom did figure out about his crush on you. She hasn't outright said that she does, but she does subtly tease Sett from time to time, reminding him to be on his best behavior/remember to be a gentleman or fixes up his appearance before leaving the house. Since she knows you as the owner's wonderful and hardworking child, she already has a good impression of you and quietly approves

Once he finally builds up the courage to ask you out, also expect for it to come with a heartfelt handmade craft of his for you <3 eg. oragami bouquet, crocheted article of clothing etc.

[love-toxin]

“Don’t even look at me, I’m already thinking about Leon getting in on the process-“ BITCH SPILL

NOW

ok but......hear me out <33

(cws: fem!reader, established marriage + friendship, m/m/f threeway, friends to lovers, cuckholdry(?), pregnancy sex, breeding kink, teasing, facesitting, spit + cum = lube, leon's a boob guy, this is just filth trust me)

So maybe Leon doesn't realize it until after Luis spills the beans that you're expecting. It's not until he sees you with that little curve of a bump in your belly that he thinks "How cute.....I kind of want that, too." and starts guiltily fantasizing about your baby being his. About you having a bump that he can fawn over and coo at, instead of having to watch Luis kiss your belly and touch it and manhandle you into his arms as he praises your newfound motherhood. It gets him so hard and he feels so ashamed of it he starts to distance himself from you, because far be it from him to ruin two friendships with people who actually like him.

And maybe you two notice this. You realize Leon's a lot clingier but he's also stepping away more often, and you clue in to what might be happening when Luis playfully teases bits of information out of him, like "So how do you feel about babies now, Leon? You gonna hurry it up so our kid has someone to play with?" spoken just sweetly enough that it has Leon struggling for an answer.

So you do the only rational thing in that situation: you invite him for an evening of board games and drinks (non-alcoholic for you of course) and when he sleeps over in your guest room as per usual, you and your sweetheart make things just a touch louder than usual when you fuck each other to sleep. The pillow gets taken out from behind the headboard so Leon can hear it squeak, can feel it thudding against the wall as Luis rails you like he hasn't already knocked you up good. You honestly get so lost in making a big show of it all that you genuinely lose your sense a little, and Luis gets a few deliciously sore scratches down his back as you grip him tight and beg him not to stop.

Leon's so observant, you knew he'd show up soon--just not so quietly, he would've scared the pants off Luis if he had any when he glanced over his shoulder and saw your friend standing in the room. Arms crossed over his buff chest, stare cold and stoic like you're in trouble, he's kind of scary....but that obvious bulge straining at his sleep pants proves that it's not annoyance but jealousy.

It's all kind of a blur when Luis acknowledges his presence, but doesn't even stop thrusting into you slowly--Leon's climbing into your bed in one moment and in the next he's been stripped bare, Luis' hand guiding his to rub your bump and an endless string of teasing spilling off his lips at how hot in the face he is. His palms are so warm and sweaty when he finally graces your belly, his touch almost possessive as he gets used to the feeling and sucks in a breath when he grazes the spot just below your breast.

"Maybe you can get the next one, eh?" Luis whispers into his ear, and Leon shudders both at the implication and the sight of you easing his hand higher to grope your tits properly. And he obeys like the good boy he is, using both hands to massage your chest and kneading the soft flesh like dough in a way that he doesn't even realize is so relaxing--having your boobs gain mass even so early in your pregnancy is pretty painful, and he seems to rub the right spots without even trying that makes that aching soreness a thing of the past.

And while he's distracted, Luis pulls himself away from that deliciously wet heat, and slides his fingers through your folds like a professional to get them as slick as he can--just so he can reach over and grab Leon's cock in his hand, your American hero grunting in response but not daring to let go of your tits once he's got them in his grasp. In fact, he latches his mouth on to one of them and gets in a taste while he can, all while your darling strokes him off with your own arousal and coats him from shaft to tip...with a little extra fondling involved, because c'mon, you can't blame him for getting in his licks where he can. Leon is gorgeous, and he's big enough that Luis feels the need to spit into his palm and add a little extra elbow grease to really make sure he's lubed up. All that twitching he gets out of it too definitely makes the kiss they share even hotter when Leon finally breaks his spit-slick mouth off of your boobs.

It's so cute when he finally shifts around to enter you, his thighs trembling the second Luis guides the tip towards your folds and pushes on him to part you around his swollen cock. Only now is he babbling those questions of "I-Is this okay?" and "I don't want to hurt you-" but they all get kissed off his mouth or straight up ignored, because both you and Luis moan much too loudly when Leon's sliding deeper and deeper into your guts. Earlier today you and your closest friend were exchanging jokes over a deck of cards, and mere hours later he's sweating and panting over your body as he fucks you with your husband watching. Not at all where you thought your friendship would go, but you're happy to see that you're not the only one satisfied with it.

"Luis," Leon moans in such a gentle way, yet grabs for your lover hard while he's sitting back to watch the show. Clearly he's not intent on letting him be a voyeur--he pulls the Spaniard close until he's practically pressed up against his back, and drags you down further on his cock until you're bucking and whining and leaking Luis' cum all over his thick shaft. "Watch me. Stop me if it hurts her."

He says as much, and Luis chuckles at his over-enthusiastic concern, but you can see from here that it's not the only reason he wanted him closer. With every tight thrust of his own hips, Leon rocks back to meet Luis'--and you can feel him getting even harder with your husband prodding him from behind, knocking up his pace even faster right up until Luis shifts forward with a groan and Leon halts, suddenly frozen and trembling with his eyes screwed shut.

"Oops," He chuckles into your friends ear, blowing on it softly to ease that tightness in his chest as he heaves for breath, slowly trying to relax himself enough to take it. "Just slipped in. You're a little too wet for me to resist, amor." He croons so mockingly, yet it only seems to turn Leon on more as he grinds those shaky hips into short, sharp thrusts inside you, each one propelled forward harder when Luis deigns to give him a buck that drags a pathetically high moan out of the agent's throat.

"Imagine a baby with his eyes, mija. Wouldn't that just be so cute?" He murmurs over Leon's shoulder, hands sliding up from their place on his hips to grope at his chest, darkly-coloured nipples lazily tweaked between his callused fingers like it's something he does every day. Neither man can take his eyes off your bump for too long though, Leon's literally drooling over it as saliva dribbles down his chin and splatters all over your soft, cute little belly.

"P-Promise me you'll give me a baby, Lee? After this one?" You mewl, holding up your pinky finger as an offering despite his hands being occupied with fondling your tits once again. "Hafta promise me. Say 'I wanna give you my baby', say it for me."

"I'm gonna breed you," He groans, eyes dark and lustful as he squeezes you hard enough for you to squeal. "You're gonna be a mom for me the second you pop."

"You're wild, Leon." Luis purrs over his shoulder, pecking a kiss to his neck that swiftly turns into a love bite suckled into the skin. "You can fuck my wife anytime. Right, sweetheart?"

"And my husband. Anytime." You giggle, though your adorable jubilance is soon cut off by a deeper moan as you start to hit your stride, fingers digging into the sheets below you before moving to brace against Leon's forearms. This time, when he spits, he dips his head to dribble it right on your clit and spares the thumb from his left hand to rub it right in, watching for the way your hips swivel in response so he knows just how to work his fingers into it.

"Princess likes her pussy eaten, too. Loves it. Let's try it when we're done, hm?" Luis' encouraging tone smoothes the thoughts away from your head, his voice blanketing your mind in nothing but a fuzzy haze that has you mindlessly humping every pair of hands and hips in your vicinity--you're just barely on the cusp of cumming, and a loopy grin splits your lips at the idea that Leon still doesn't know how hard you're gonna do it.

"Get on top of me, and I'll do it all damn night. Both of you."

"I-I'm heavy, Lee-"

"Don't care. I'll do it when you're full-term. You're never too heavy to sit this gorgeous pussy on my fucking face."

At that low, lusty growl of a compliment, Luis has finally met his match--you look on in awe as your husband cries out and frantically speeds up his pace, locks of dark hair sticking to his face with sweat as he pumps his last few ounces of energy into several deep, hard thrusts against Leon's backside that rock him into you and have you both crying out his name in a fit of pleasure that completely dominates your senses. Your hips jerk suddenly and he moans from his chest at how hard you're clamping down on him, but it doesn't stop his own thrusts until you're leaking and splashing him with jets of liquidy cum that totally soak him right down to his thighs. And from behind, Luis has his waist in a death grip as he spurts ropes upon ropes inside your friend, making him so slick he slides out with ease yet whines softly as his thoughts fizzle out and he mindlessly tries to push his sloppy cock back inside.

Stuck firmly in the middle, Leon's got nowhere else to go--when he cums, he drags you all the way down by the hips and forces his cock deep, pushing it snug and warm against your womb so he can spill into you relentlessly. It's as if Luis is cumming through him to add to the thick, creamy mess he leaves dripping out of your pussy, but pulling back and seeing that it's all him switches something in his brain that he had been desperate to keep locked away. Now that you've invited him into your marriage bed, however, it seems there's no better time to exercise it.

Before you can leak too much, Leon's sliding his hands under your hips and lifting you off the bed, shuffling back to lay down and incidentally splattering himself from thigh to chest with the cum he's left spilling out of you. But once he's lowered you quickly and comfortably on his face, mouth instantly sealed around the puffy lips of your cunt, there's no hurry at all and Leon blindly sucks away at the mess you three have made. And having been nudged aside, Luis clambers over Leon's body to reach his lap, eyes gentle and adoring as he watches your pretty, pregnant body writhe on the tip of his closest friend's skilled tongue.

"Oye--I don't think you can fit, caballero." He grins, reaching back to swipe up the cum between Leon's own thighs and rubbing his soaked fingers carefully inside himself. And just when he's managed to stretch himself open the smallest bit, one of those massive hands comes blindly groping down his chest, and upon reaching his hip Leon yanks it down and bucks his hips at the same time, spearing your husband so swiftly and suddenly that he braces himself against his chest in a fit of hot, stuttered gasps.

"A-And you thought it would be easy," You tease, taking hold of your husband's hands to lift him back up and kiss that dazed expression off his face.

"I think he's in my guts, mi amor--is he part horse? Dios mio-" Leon responds with another buck, this one harder and punctuated with a deep jab of his tongue into your spongy, gummy walls, and both of you are left whinging and moaning at his teasing but never quit riding him on either end. It's a different experience to rub your husband's sticky, half-soft cock while he grinds that impossibly tight ass against someone else--but with it being Leon, it feels as normal and safe as when you're doing it together. It feels right.

And as you clutch at your bump with one hand while the other clings tightly to your husband's, you let the rest of your weight sink down slowly to finally, completely relax, and both he and Leon look and feel so grateful for the gift. They both look at you like it's a blessing just to be in your presence, and to have that from two of your closest friends is just an indescribable feeling--maybe it's part of what makes this kind of intimacy feel so damn good, even while you're going through the early stages of what will certainly be a long pregnancy.

"You're going to be such a good papi," You whisper with a smile, nuzzling your nose into your husband's. "Both of you will, I know it." And from below, Leon pauses his fervent assault to lift you up and lave his tongue slowly over your clit--just enough that the warm, wet kiss he places on it lets you feel the curve of his grin against your skin before he goes right back to urging you into another hot, deep, spine-tingling orgasm.

[issdisgrace]

Hiii! I saw your tall buff reader who’s hands-y with Thomas Shelby and very much enjoyed it and was wondering if I could request something similar with Alfie Solomons,

where Tall Buff Male!Reader is really affectionate, blushes all easy and has a habit of getting Alfie to sit on his lap and can be and is really suave when he wants to be. He’s is being unknowingly really affectionate and Alfie is really affectionate back, I dunno if you feel comfortable you can take this and do what you want with it.

I’m having a bad dysphoric day and would love for this to be a thing for be to read

- 🏳️‍⚧️

THE LOVEY COUPLE

WARNINGS: None

A/N: I hope you enjoy this despite it not being exactly what you wanted. Also I'm sorry if this isn't the greatest. I tried. It was kinda hard because I didn't really know what direction I want to go for this.

The pairing of Y/n L/n and Alfie Solomons was a strange one indeed. Y/n was a tall, buff man with a heart of gold that could never do harm to anyone. While Alfie on the other hand was his polar opposite. Alfie was rough, gruff, not as tall as Y/n and was known for brutality. No one quite knew how the two even met. Let alone became lovers. But one thing that was known about the couple is that they were very lovey maybe to at time lovey. So here’s 3 scenes in which the weird couple were lovey.

Y/n had not been feeling the greatest all day. So he went to find Alfie in his office. Not thinking about it Y/n walked in the office without knocking. Alfie was sitting in his chair as another man sat infront of him smoking a cigarette. Y/n frowned to himself. Alfie didn’t like when people smoked.

“Sigh, Y/n what are you doing here.” Alfie says getting up from his chair.

“Sorry I didn’t know you had company.” Y/n mumbles as Alfie stands infront of him.

“It’s ok just knock next time.”

“Ok.” Alfie smiles at the man giving him a kiss. That gets a little heated that only is broken up by the man clearing his throat. Alfie gives y/n a quick kiss before saying,

“How about you go grab lunch for us. I’ll be done by the time you get back.”

“Alright, love you.” Y/n says giving him a kiss before practically skipping out of the office.

How Alfie got on Y/n’s lap he had no clue. Y/n just happily held Alfie tightly to his body. Planting kisses to the back of Alfie’s neck innocently. Alfie pays no mind to Y/n. And continues to talk business with Ollie. Ollie eyes flickered between his boss and his bosses partner. Ollie found the sight in front of him strange. In the time he worked for Alfie he never seen the man show an ounce of love but here he was. Soaking up the love from a man and evening giving it back. It bewildered him and he wondered if his boss was replaced with a imposter.

Alfie stood in the bakery barking out insults to the new bakers as they fumbled trying not to mess up and get them all killed. As Alfie did so his partner was latched on to him. Y/n had his arms wrapped around Alfie with his head resting on his shoulder. Every time Alfie moved Y/n moved not once letting go.

“Are you ok.” Alfie finally ask, finding his extra clinginess strange.

“I just love you.”

“I love you too, Y/n.” Alfie says turning around in the man’s grip kissing him. The simple kiss turned into a innocent make out session or at least it was innocent to Y/n.

EXTRA:

“Is it me or has the boss been all lovey since he got a boyfriend.”

“No, it’s not you. He has been.”

“It’s weird. I want the old boss back. The one that wasn’t all lovey around us with his partners.”

[captainmera]

Hellu!! In the latest chapter of tgb you spoke about hunters political power as the golden guard, and I would love to hear more about that if you would like to share !!

Sure! :)

This is super long, though. Because context of why I conclude these things are important to know!

Enjoy..!

This is just me being a history buff, though. And if you've read my webcomic In Blood we Rise, you know I like playing with the social-culture of a society.

So from the bits and pieces I've picked up from the show, either via how characters treat one another (Ex. Boscha, Amity, Willow, Gus) and the use of titles (coven heads, Emperor, "prince" - aka Golden Guard) I expand upon those clues and apply what I know of those titles, or the human equivalents of them.

The Golden Guard is, although mockingly, referred as similar to a prince title. Whatever it actually is or not is up to anyone's guess. But given that the GG is the Emperor's right-hand man, and the Emperor is a sort of religious leader/dictator.. I concluded that the GG is somewhat similar in nature.

If "Emperor" is a leader, with religious implication (as Hunter himself used the words such as "sacrilege" when invading Belos' mind) and is commonly known to know the will of the Titan (their god and nature).

Then, I think it is fair to say, that the GG most likely has similar roles but on a smaller scale.

Hunter was raised into this role, not unlike how a prince is raised to become king one day.

- If Emperor = Pope. - Then GG is = King, a military general, priesthood. - The Coven heads = Gentry (Earls, Barons, Marquesses, etc) - People like the Blights are = Gentry (Lords, Ladies, etc) - Maybe people like the Clawthornes are = Middle class? (Merchants?) - And people like the Parks or Porters are = Peasants (lower classes up to lower middle class). - And people like... *shrug* ..? ... Steve? = Peasants (Lower working class to upper working class)

This hierarchy is similar to the English one, Philip Wittebane was English. I am going on a limb here that Philip conjuncted his own application of the hierarchy he knew of onto an already existing system.

So we got the previous hierarchy system (shown and told by Boscha, mostly, and Amity in season 1). With whatever Philip could layer ontop. So it's not accurate-accurate, but a bit to the left.

We know power is important. And we know they talk about important FAMILIES. The Blight's "Dont associate" with weaker witches. Implying that some families with better magic and power have a higher status, and it is even encouraged to impose your status on those beneath you.

The teachers don't intervene when Boscha bullies Willow, they even celebrate her for her superiority. However, they do allow Willow to show her worth through POWER too.

So you can raise in social ranks by being better than others. Hence why other witches were so eager to take advantage of Gus, too. Gus is from a lower or middle class, but his illusionist powers are superior. He could easily rise to become a coven head one day. If recognised for this, others might want to hitch a ride for as long as he can carry them.

We know nothing of the Boiling Isles culture before Belos took over.

We do know a bit of traditional cultural things; like Palismen and the bed-nests. You could even say that Eda is a traditionalist in that sense, as she wants to use Wild Magic like they used to do on the isles.

We also know that The Titan's children used to be running around plentiful, that there was a subgroup of Witches that were Hunters too! (Hunter's name being Hunter has so many layers, man.. Not just Witch-Hunter-General but, like, hunters hunting Titans - the literal, kind of, devil imagery of this realm. Maybe Belos knew? Maybe he met the titan hunters? Maybe that's how he knew how to find the not-broken-mirror of the collector? What else did he know? WHO KNOWS.)

But the Titans has been dead for a very long time. But in that time in-between, we know people did exist. And where there is people, there is structure and culture. And back then, in the Deadwardian times, we know they knew they lived upon the Titan. It would not be so farfetched if they had some sort of priesthood similar to.... The greek temples?

The illusionist graveyard statues are... Coming to mind. I struggle to believe that illusionists were supposedly always considered the lowest and most useless group of magic users. It is heavely implied that Gus talents were meant for greatness. Especially in regards to the human realm.

I think, with the stone portal being as Hellenistic and temple-looking, that there might've been once-upon-a-time where witches frequented into the human realm more often. Perhaps with the use of illusion magic. Perhaps, back then, being an illusionist was a great thing to be.

But time changes things. What used to be a useful skill falls out of style. And whatever else (like Abomination slime) becomes more useful to the contemporary culture, that's what will be on the rise.

Speaking of abomination, I think it's meant to represent a sort-of industrial revolution ordeal. And that's where the Blights took a big shine in power.

... AAAANNYYWAAAAAYY~~~!

You had to read my thoughtprocess on that before I can go into your actual question.

SO..! The Golden Guard!

First, let's figure out what the heck a prince does and typical life could look like. Let's look at the real life prince of England at the time! Charles the first.

Charles was born on 29 May 1630. In August 1642 (twelve years old), the long-running dispute between Charles I and Parliament culminated in the outbreak of the First English Civil War. In October the same year (still twelve years old), Prince Charles and his younger brother James were present at the Battle of Edgehill. And spent the next two years (so fourteen years old at the end of that) based in the Royalist capital of Oxford. In January 1645 (so now fifteen), Charles was given his own Council and was made titular head of Royalist forces in the West Country. By spring 1646 (so now ca sixteen years old, like Hunter), most of the region had been occupied by Parliamentarian forces and Charles went into exile to avoid capture. Charles I surrendered into captivity in May 1646. (sixteen)

Right! So uhh... Surprisingly similar to Hunter's current situation with Wild Witches and rebellion brewing.

The thing about royals, yeah, is that they are given this birthright to lead the people "by god". Being king, queen, whatever, is a deeply Christian religious occupation.

We are talking about a time when people who were rich were just inherently deemed more morally superior. Because god let them be born into privilege. Of course, humans are humans and we are critical beings. There's a reason why the French chopped the head off their royals: People don't always agree to the status quo, no matter how religiously influential it is.

Philip Wittebane would have this bias too, though. At least somewhere in his consciousness.

Back in the days, being a "Gentleman" actually meant something. It was not just a title given by birth, it was something you had to live up to. That is why it was such a dramatic offence if a gentleman did not behave like one. When you are born into a leading position, you are expected to lead with the people in mind. Corruption, of course, happens anyway and people don't do what they're supposed to. Either because they don't want to, never asked for it, or simply take advantage of it.

Either case, a title had purpose. Just like a prince. It doesn't matter if you're twelve years old. If you're a prince you are taught, raised and told to behave a certain way to impose both courage and confidence in the people.

If you say shit like "I THINK I know what to do" nobody will trust you. You're twelve, but you're supposed to be a better breed than everyone else, after all, God appointed you into being a royal. You must be special. If you're not, then God made a mistake. If God makes mistakes.. Well, then God is flawed.

God cannot be flawed. Everything rides on the belief that God knows all, is all mighty, etc. God is absolute. You were supposed to trust God. So a twelve-year-old prince is expected to just... Pretty much be the same as a 30-year-old man, intellectually. They could speak four languages, they were already reading military tragedies, and so on.

But they're just twelve and, will, in secrecy (as we know) enjoy things that twelve year-olds enjoy. Like fairytales.

Back to the Golden Guard.

We know that Hunter has no respect from the Coven heads (parliament of sort), lol. They don't think he has the knowledge 'nor wisdom to lead. He haven't even raised the ranks in such a visible way, presumably the way they have.

Darius, whom we know nothing of, could either be like Gus and be an extremely talented abominationist regardless of his class. Or he's like the Blights; from a rich background and worked hard with the good cards life handed to him, and was expected to rise high (like Amity) and did so.

Meaning, the coven heads are peers out of respect. They aren't competition to one another, they are experts in their fields of magic. It is people trying to rise to their position that they need to put a foot onto to keep them beneath their own rank.

Supposedly, Raine outshone the previous Bard Coven head. Either the old one died, or Raine was just better.

All of this, though, means that the Coven heads resent Hunter. He's above them, but haven't "fought" through the classes like the others. He was born above them, and now rose above them. There's no reason to believe he is better. Especially without having any magic.

Hunter has a lot to prove as the Golden Guard.

The way Darius speaks of his mentor, the previous GG, we can assume that that GG had proven himself even without magic. He had respect. Darius is comparing them both.

Hunter might've been raised sheltered because the previous one might've NOT been raised sheltered and that went horribly wrong.

SO.. AGAIN....... WHAT CAN THE GG DO?

Priesthood slash general, in a royal sense!

So basically he's a pirate captain, yar harr. Or at least in the fictional sense, Captains weren't actually capable of wedding or divorcing people.

Priesthood,

because Belos is implying he's got a religious connection with the Titan. So pressumably, Hunter can do cermonious things like.. Weddings and divorce, knighting someone into Covens with a glove or in other means, spiritual guidence like taking confessions/forgiving-or-offering consolance on the behalf of the Titan.

We don't really know much about the B.I. culture before Belos, other than wild magic and the previlent use of Palismen and Titan Blood.

We also know portals were a thing, and supposedly that there are forgotten portals where Human Garbage slips in now and then.

Presumably, on my part anyhow, I think there were priests not too unsimilar to the Coven heads, but rather so they were experts in their fields (like Illusionists) but weren't hindered from using other magic too.

Perhaps the highest priest(ess), were someone who was fluent in all magics (like eda). True wild magic. The Golden Guard, being at the top of the ladder, most likely is supposedly an equevalence of this.

So, the ironic symbolism here then; is that Hunter has no magic. It is a false system.

General,

because the Golden Guard went through scout training and is the highest rank. He would be expected to know battle stragedy, history, how to fight and be leading in battle. As well as take the risk of losing his head if captured.

He would speak to others like his words are definite and absolute. Like he is above others, whatever he believes himself to be so or not.

He can't say shit like "I think we should do this" it doesn't make an army trust him with their lives. He has to be more confident than them, that he is willing to die with this move, too, with them. "This is how we win." <- no matter how insane the plan is, if he sounds confident they trust him. The same way I would trust my teacher during a fire alarm. I know where the fire exit is! I still turn to my teacher, incase they know something I dont and want me to take the window instead.

You trust authority who has gained your trust in their ability to lead you in a crisis. The Golden Guard, supposedly being the title that describes THE BEST OF THE BEST witch on the isle... You may not know how they got there, but you know they did. You may trust it, you may not. But the average citizen might.

Hunter can't show that he doesnt know what to do. He cannot surrender. Because if HE don't know what to do, they're all fucked.

He has to make decissions based on logic and stragedy alone. And sound confident about his decissions, regardless of his true feelings. He can be terrified, and stand with his head high and order the palismen around to ensure the house is secure.

His fear comes out as a general taking charge. Because that's hat he knows. The same way a K-Pop dancer 's muscle memory kicks in on certain songs, Hunter's muscle memory is to step into his GG mask and hand out orders.

Until his friends call him out and he drops the "mask" and reveals that he's just a teen like any of them, wanting to roll under a bed and hide.

Prince,

he is Belos' nephew and Belos has the title Emperor, not pope. Although the GG is a title you can rise to, Hunter's specific situation of having been born and raised in the castle gives him a bit of a royal edge.

This means, most likely, that most if not all of the citizen would assume that.. Once Belos dies of old age, the one to take "temporary" seat as emperor is the right-hand man. And, possibly, just take the seat all together as a succession.

No wonder Belos made his nephew the GG, it secured his only remaining family a good position after his soon-passing and.. Politically, it would assure that the power of the throne remains within the family. Furthering the suspicion that Hunter hasn't earned his role. it is all a game of political chess.

He's the highest rank after all, why not just take the seat and be in charge once Belos passes away from age or illness? (I believe this is why Kikimora wants to be the GG and sucks up to him even if she knows he's cruel, by the way. Belos is old, it's just a waiting game.)

He could also make supreme court decissions. Forgive a crime, decide something is a crime when presented a case, and sentence people.

We see him threathen Luz with this when he steals palismen.

He is quite entitled, and I don't really blame him for it. He's been isolated and brought up to believe it is his right to be entitled. He has also proven it to himself, through hard work, that he has earned the right to be absolute and the final word.

SO, WHAT ABOUT POLITICAL, CONVOLUTED, CONTEXTS?

It also makes him a political target.

Kikimora wants him dead, to take his place. Perhaps so she could become empress once Belos dies off.

Had the show been allowed several more seasons, I'm confident we might've had a longer arc for Hunter to change sides. Maybe even be kidnapped by Darius-or-Raine before or after Hollow Mind happens.

Raine might know Belos wants him back, Darius might want to keep Hunter hidden and away. Both cases makes Hunter a chess piece. He still represents things for the people of the B.I. for better or worse.

For Darius - People who believe in the GG might, after Belos being overthrown, want Hunter to take his place as a "kind prince". With Darius as right-hand and mentor. As, perhaps, Darius would consider that a suden change in culture and power might be too shocking and difficult to adjust for the people. Something similar, like a pinnce, might be easier than a sudden NO MORE ANYTHING AT ALL. That would lead to civil divide and maybe even war.

For Raine - Hunter could be used to exchange a prisoner (maybe Eda?) and, or, be kept until after the rebellion to serve for his own crimes. (of course, this is only before they would discover Hunter's just as much a victim as everyone else, if not more). They could also consider that Hunter knows A LOT about Belos and secrets he might've kept. Perhaps even discovering that Hunter is a grimwalker and things develop from there.

The people - Hate him or love him. No plan is really a good one of what to do with him post-war. All ideas have conflict of interest or consequences. Honestly, putting Hunter in any position post-war might just stirr up unnecesary opinions. But leaving him totally be might make people upset and discontent as well.

There is also the question of HIS CRIMES. Because yes, he did "just do his job", and that might bode less on other coven heads, but Hunter? Hunter wasn't doing just his job, it was his life. The context of him being a grimwalker and manipulated, abuse and brought up with a sole purpose.... Does put some different lights on his after-thought crimes in Belos' name.

Because AT THE TIME, they were not crimes. Harvesting the palistrom forest, imprisoning wild witches, forcing conversion into covens, sentencing people to prison or petrification is... You know. Things he was supposed to do as the GG. He also had no choice but to become the GG. He didn't chose it. Belos did.

So debate would undoubtfully come up on whatever he deserves punishment or not.

I think, to satisfy everyone. He might get a very low sentence, slap on the wrist. Forbidden to participate in politics, perhaps? Who knows.

I'M JUST PUTTING FROSTING ON THE CAKE HERE, I DON'T KNOW. I'm just a storyteller with an oh-la-la~ for drama and the clashes of people of different backgrounds and lives. I personally enjoy bringing people together in crisis from all spectrums of a society, and boil them down to what makes them human and connect with one another.

So... Take all of this with a grain of salt from someone just... Enjoys convoluted mayhem like this. Where a straight-forward answer is never quite that simple.

But there is always a way. :)

Just gotta turn on the light, and finding one another wont be as difficult as running in the dark fighting demons.

[moonpetrichors-blog]

Sharing A Bed With Jake

Tags: Jake Sully x Reader, Oneshot, Sharing a Bed, Sleeping Headcanon, Gn!Reader, Fluff

Warnings: Size Difference Bc Jake is a Buff Man 🙏

Jake Sully is a hot sleeper, and you like to cuddle. Jake constantly wakes up sweating in the middle of the night because you are glued to him.

I made sweating sound poetic

* ˚ ��� 495 Words • Read below the cut  

╭┈─────── ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-╰┈➤ ❝ [06/01/23] ❞    

Jake huffed.

He attempted to roll you away from him, but you nestled deeper into his wonderfully warm chest, slinging your arms and legs across the broad expanse of his body. You nuzzled into the crook of his neck, unconsciously exploiting him as your personal heating pack, and he grumbled softly at the contact. As you slept, you were drawn to him inexplicably, like a moth to a flame.

It was almost comical how he was much, much bigger than you, yet you rendered him impotent in the midst of eclipse. When he endeavored to push you away, you merely delved deeper into the contours and valley of his body, fitting like a precise jigsaw puzzle. He would've admired the way your bodies were seemingly moulded for one another, if it weren't for the glistening film of perspiration laid on Jake's burning skin.

But alas, each time he failed to close his eyes, you'd stir in your sleep and shift against him, your breath lilting. Small beads of sweat were already gathering on his temples, gradually trickling down; his skin was hot, like clay being fired in a kiln. With your cheek firmly glued to the rough crests of his torso, he had no clue how you didn't wake up frustrated.

Jake raised his eyes to the endless blanket of stars. And soon, the barking of distant nantangs penetrated the night's calm; he cringed at an old memory of them. Jake knew he was doomed to remain awake, and the searing temperature of his skin rising ever so steadily served as an irritating reminder.

...

He was right.

You awoke, yawning and stretching the stiffness out of your limbs. Your rest was excellent, but when you glanced besides you, your partner resembled a wrung-out towel.

An astute observation, you thought.

Jake's piercing glare darted from the canopies to your eyes, his lips pursed in a frown. “Do you have any idea what you put me through last night?”

You feigned contemplating his question before shrugging. This was a frequent occurrence between you two; you'd have the most exquisite slumber of your life, while Jake appeared like a sleep-deprived racoon.

However, not this time. Jake yanked you by the forearm, trapping you beneath his heavy, sweltering body, before you could continue your morning. You slammed your fist against his chest, demanding that he got off of you because, let's be honest. Nobody desired the crushing weight of a ten-foot-tall man smothering them.

Jake was unconcerned. He chuckled slyly as he mirrored your gestures from the night prior, encircling his muscular arms around your smaller frame; his head dipped besides yours so he could rest soundly. You attempted to thrash beneath him, but it was all for naught. You were sweating now as you pleaded for someone to help you from your mate's clutches, only to have your cry fall on deaf ears as it rustled through the unsympathetic bushes.

You never slept glued to him again.

[karvroom]

10 Things I Hate About Katsuki Bakugo

◤━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━◥

⇦ 007. Convincing the Brute

008. Bikini Kill, the Raincoats and Letters to Cleo

Sero and Kirishima felt a familiar sensation regarding their whereabouts. They were at a biker club where they suspected Bakugo to be at. Heavy rock music filled the scene as they travelled deeper into the hazy maze of pool tables and buff biker men.

The red head awkwardly coughed at the scent of cigarette fumes, drawing even more attention than before. All eyes were on them; panicky and overwhelmed high school boys who had no business being at a biker bar whatsoever.

"Wow, is this what a bar looks like?" Kirishima innocently asked. They came to a stop at a counter that had a jar. Without a second thought, Kirishima reached into the jar, pulling out a packaged condom.

Sero's eyes widened, smacking the object to the floor and out of Kirishima's hands. "Don't touch anything. You may get hepatitis."

Sero walked away from his friend, only for Kirishima to follow closely behind. Bakugo had been spotted playing pool all by himself, fumes of smoke surrounding him as he set up to hit the white ball.

Bakugo noticed the two, standing up right from his bent over position. The blonde turned his back to the green table, resting himself against the wood, "So what have you got for me?"

"A little insight into a very complicated girl." Kirishima explained. Bakugo set down his pool stick, replacing the object in his hands with a glass of beer. He chugged down half of what remained in his cup.

"Excuse me. Just one question before we start." Sero interrupted. Bakugo brought the glass away from his lips, setting the almost finished cup on the unoccupied pool table. Sero pointed to the glass once he had Bakugo's full attention, "Should you be drinking alcohol when you don't have a liver?"

"What?" Bakugo's face contorted. His brows furrowed, giving Sero a dazed look of bewilderment.

"Nothing. Nothing." Sero waved his hands in the air.

Kirishima looked at his friend in disbelief. Why would he ask such a personal question? Then again, Sero had the slightest clue about social awareness. His lack of friends at the moment said something. Bakugo brought a cigarette to his lips, using his red lighter to ignite the tip filled with tobacco. He inhaled the toxic smoke, only to take the stick away from his mouth and blow it into the air.

The smoke Bakugo exhaled only made the bar more polluted. It added to the overwhelming aroma of cigarettes and leather—the only thing the men that were in the building knew how to reek of.

"All right, first thing. (Y/N) hates smokers." Kirishima hesitantly took the cigarette out of Bakugo's grasp, dropping onto the floor and smashing the light out with the bottom of his shoe.

"So, you're telling me I'm a non-smoker."

"Yes." Sero and Kirishima gave one great big nod. The ravenette held his hands up in the air defensively, afraid Bakugo would make him choke on his smoke next, "Well, just for now."

"And here's another problem." Kirishima looked between Sero and Bakugo. "Mina said that (Y/N) likes pretty guys."

Silence rushed between the three of them. While Sero and Kirishima awkwardly watched for the blonde's reaction, Bakugo stared back at them intently. His mouth slightly hung open. He pushed himself off the pool table, standing to his full height.

"Are you telling me I'm not a pretty guy?" Bakugo pointed to himself, disbelief laced in his tone.

"He's very pretty!" Sero was quick to respond, gesturing toward Bakugo. "He's a gorgeous guy!"

"Yeah, I—I just wasn't sure." Kirishima shrugged, talking over Sero's shower of compliments. "I didn't know."

Bakugo leaned back against the pool table, using his hands to prop himself comfortably. He relaxed as the two boys cowered in front of him.

"All right. Uh, yeah, okay. Here's this." Kirishima cleared his throat, abruptly looking at Bakugo before pulling out a piece of paper him and Mina devised to read off of. ""Likes. Thai food, feminist prose and angry girl music of the indie rock persuasion". Here's a list of CDs she has in her room."

Kirishima handed the intent blonde the list, allowing him to read off the names in his head himself. After a brief scan of the list, Bakugo looked back up, "So, I'm supposed to buy her some noodles and a book and sit around listening to chicks who can't play their instruments, right?"

"Have you ever been to Club Skunk?" Sero asked. "Her favorite band's playing there tomorrow night."

Bakugo shook his head, scoffing at Sero's words, "I can't be seen at Club Skunk, all right?"

"But she'll be there. She's got tickets."

"Assail your ears for one night." Sero spoke nodding with Kirishima.

"She has a pair of black underwear." Bakugo looked back at Kirishima, facial expression staying the same. "If that helps."

"Couldn't hurt, right?" Sero chuckled, hitting Bakugo in the arm playfully. He acted as if they were best buds catching up during a reunion.

────୨ৎ────

Rock music blasted throughout the building as you indulged in the scene. The club was full of women from all different kinds of backgrounds. Strobe lights scattered around the crowded building, always managing to hit you in the eyes when you least expected it.

You were in the front row of the mass, dancing the night away with Jiro. Both of you were dressed in your going-out clothes. You sung the lyrics of the current song playing, whooping with the ladies around you in between words.

Bakugo smiled seeing how much fun you were having. You were easy to spot in the large horde of young women, mostly because your face was the only one he was concerned about at the time.

He found himself surprisingly uncomfortable surrounded by the beautiful girls, ultimately deciding the bar was his best bet at seeking solace.

"Bakugo! What are you doing here tonight?" The bartender asked, shaking hands with the blonde who shot him a smile.

You told Jiro you'd be right back. Your throat had gone dry after screaming the lyrics for so long. You travelled through the sweaty crowd, heading directly to the bar. It was skin against skin in the club and you needed a refresher.

Once you made eye contact with the bartender, you shouted, "Two waters, please!"

You leaned against the bar as you watched the guy search for the water bottles. You cranked your head to your left seeing a familiar sight of blonde hair sitting on a barstool. You've got to be kidding. You rolled your eyes, handing the bartender a wad of cash as he gave you the waters.

You walked a clear path to the male, only setting the bottles on the bar once you reached Bakugo. You shouted over the music, "If you're planning on asking me out, again you might as well just get it over with."

"Do you mind?" Bakugo hollered back before taking a swig of his beverage. "You're kind of ruining this for me."

"You're not surrounded by your usual cloud of smoke." You pointed out, watching as his adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed.

In the moment, he was shorter than you because of the way he slouched against the bar top. Bakugo leaned away from the wood, adjusting his body to be a little closer to yours. "I know. I quit. Apparently, they're bad for you."

"You think?"

"You know, these guys are no Bikini Kill or the Raincoats." Bakugo admitted, shrugging as he watched you adjust your top, "But they're not bad."

Bakugo stood up from his seat at the bar, walking deeper into the bodies of people. On a whim, you decided to follow him, grabbing your waters before doing so.

"You know who the Raincoats are?" You were in disbelief at his knowledge of the girl band—one of your favorites.

"Why, don't you?" He leaned over to the side, almost talking into your ear. He stopped in his tracks, facing the stage where the band was playing. Bakugo licked his lips, using the same hand he was holding his cup in to point at the front row audience. The song was coming to an end, meaning he could've lowered his tone, but he didn't, "I was watching you out there before. I've never seen you look so sexy."

The girls around caught the last part of his sentence, making them laugh. You grinned, letting out a huff of embarrassment. The boy had no shame, which you found hilarious.

Bakugo smiled with that boyish charm after seeing your expression. He leaned closer into your personal bubble, "Come to Iida's party with me."

"You never give up, do you?" You asked as another song started playing. The heavy BOOM of the drums sounding throughout the club.

Bakugo dramatically looked around before turning back to you, "Was that a yes?"

"No." You shook your head, refusing to make eye contact with him. You started to walk away, realizing Jiro was probably dying of thirst like you were.

"Well, then, was that a no?" Bakugo shouted after you.

"No." You exclaimed behind you.

"I'll see you at 9:30 then!"

◣━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━◢

⇨ 009. Tenya Iida’s Epic Banger

taglist🫐 @katsukota @wheezdostuff @honeydwitch @chuugarettes @suckstobrlaurie @the-hangry-otter @napbatata @bestboileeknow

[ozzgin]

So I was wondering how Lisa Lisa, Caesar, and Joseph react to accidentally awakening Pillar woman reader( who is EXTRA Buff) . And while the three of them think Reader’s a threat, the reality she’s just a gentle giantess. And just pats Joseph head, and doesn’t seem to understand that they’re humans per say, but thinks their younger Pillar men?

Love the idea! After writing the Baki x JoJo crossover my mind has wandered to a Pillar Woman, too. A proper one. I also played around with Midjourney to see if I could get a glimpse at a potential Pillar Woman, and it’s not as muscular as I would’ve wished but it looks interesting nonetheless.

JJBA Headcanons: Pillar Woman! Reader

Featuring Lisa Lisa, Caesar, Joseph, and an awakened Pillar Woman that’s not as threatening as her male counterpart.

Joseph and Caesar are not only irritated by each other’s company, but by the sheer pointlessness of this task that has interrupted their training. Three Pillar Men have emerged from this site and fiddling around unturned stones only serves in delaying their fight. Their whines are quickly silenced by Lisa Lisa’s orders to continue their search. If they have time to moan, they have time to look for clues. The UV lights have long been discarded after the gory incident, so the narrow rays of flashlights only add to their frustration.

A faint sound catches their attention and they simultaneously turn towards a pillar at the end of the chamber. “Is that an unfinished sculpture or something?” Caesar ponders as he gazes as the bizarre block of stone with a vaguely chiseled arm protruding out of it. “I can’t believe this. I should be perfecting my deadly moves and here I am listening to your art commentary instead. Should we have a little séance session so you can ask them directly?” Joseph responds in a mocking tone. Their bickering continues under the scolding glares of the woman supervising them.

Her sigh of annoyance is abruptly drowned by the loud cracks of collapsing rubble. The bulky pillar seems to be disintegrating and they quickly cover their faces, scrambling to avoid the thick clouds of dust rapidly flooding the room. Once the smoke clears out, their faces twist in shock at the sight of yet another Pillar person that has somehow evaded the previous investigations. Although this one seems to be a woman.

The group is taken aback by the colossal size of this specimen. She’s significantly larger than all the Pillar Men they have encountered, with impressive muscular mass. Joseph and Caesar have already positioned themselves in strategic fighting stances and Lisa Lisa bites her lower lip, stressed by the unexpected encounter. They haven’t managed to lay a finger on the original Pillar Men. Would they stand a chance against this behemoth of a creature?

You stretch your limbs and lazily scan the area. How long has it been since you’ve gone to sleep? You don’t recognize a single thing. The humans before you are small are slender. Children? You’re not quite sure. You hear them mumble among themselves and you realize it’s a language foreign to you, although you quickly pick up the vocabulary. You approach Joseph and place your large hand on his head, trying to reassure the young boy of his safety. “Are your parents nearby? Perhaps they could explain my situation better.” You state in a soft voice. Caesar cannot help the laugh that erupts out of him, having to rest on his knees to manage the convulsions. Joseph barks at him, annoyed and embarrassed, and politely removes your hand, explaining he’s a grown man. You can only stare in shock.

Once it is confirmed that you are indeed no threat, Lisa Lisa describes the recent events to you. You listen intently, arms crossed. You don’t particularly care for humans, but you don’t like the cockiness displayed by the awakened Pillar Men, nor their supposed intentions. In your current state, you could use some entertainment. You might as well lend a hand to the amusing individuals that found you.

[heartbreakprincehbk]

is there anyway that you can write a dating headcannon for kevin? thank you for all your work it’s literally all so good🙏

Kevin is not perfect, but he tries harder than any man to be. He takes every commitment in life seriously, and being a partner is definitely something he holds in high esteems.

Kevin would meet you away from his hometown while he’s on the road for wrestling. He was in your area for about two weeks, and while exploring the sights on a day off, he would see you in one of the shops.

It would be unlike anything he’s ever felt or experienced; his world would just stop and all there was to him was you, standing oblivious to his stare.

He would continue to watch you, going back and forth in an argument with himself about whether or not to approach you.

Finally, just as it appeared you were about to leave, he would hurry after you.

“Hey!” You would look at him in alarm, this very buff man yelling would throw you off, but he would immediately apologize in that soft voice of his.

“Sorry. I, uh…I just wanted to catch you before you left.”

His smile is so warm and kind and unassuming, so even if you normally wouldn’t, you asked him what you could do for him. From there, he would almost sheepishly admit he was in town for “work” and unfamiliar with the area. He would ask where’s the best local food joint, and that’s how you sat side by side in a booth eating cheeseburgers.

A whirlwind of two weeks would ensue. You offered your services for the rest of his time in your town. Kevin wouldn’t admit immediately what his “work” was, afraid it would scare you away.

He would fall so FAST, but he would keep telling himself to calm down and try to play it cool. He just thinks you’re the most interesting person he’s ever met. He loves your mind and outlook on life and how he always felt infinitely happier with you.

Every day was like a new adventure. It felt like an entire lifetime had been lived by the end of each day—museums, landmarks, roller blading, random jeep tours and sightseeing, hiking, antique shops.

He was so nervous to admit he was a wrestler, but his time in your town was coming to an end, and he wanted to invite you to his last match, where he would be pulling off a win. He figured it was now or never and if it wasn’t meant to be, he would be leaving anyways.

You had an inkling Kevin must have been some sort of athlete due to his size as well as his coordination, but wrestler wasn’t something you would have ever guessed.

“I’m a wrestler, okay?” He would say in the same tone as if he were admitting he committed crimes. You would just blink at him like ???

He was happy you didn’t run at least and merely had you sit front row as an explanation. You were absolutely floored watching him; him flying from the top ropes and how strong he was blew your mind. (Plus, he looked very good)

Kevin definitely showed off quite a bit, showing off his best moves and athleticism. Lots of crossbody dives from the top rope, headscissor take downs, flying through the air. He felt so proud afterwards after winning with the claw to see you standing on your feet, clapping and cheering just as ferociously as the seasoned fans.

“This is your real job?” You would ask incredulously, your voice full of so much awe and wonder that he couldn’t help but laugh. All he would do after the match is wrap you in a hug, melting into your arms.

“I really like you, Y/N. Gosh, you just have no clue. I don’t even want to go back anymore; I didn’t want to come here and now I can’t imagine if I hadn’t.” He would tell you the morning of his departure. He wouldn’t let go of the goodbye hug for a long time, and only left when they were doing last calls for his flight.

He would beg you to write him, and you would exchange addresses and phone numbers.

Without planning or agreeing, everything basically turned into a long distant unofficial relationship.

To Kevin, you’re his freedom. There are times he feels trapped and burdened, but whenever he sees you, it’s always a breath of fresh air for him. Suddenly, he remembers he can breathe. Suddenly, there was something to work towards in his life.

You both would write letters every week, never running out of things to talk about. Kevin would call you every night, even when he had matches.

Sometimes when you called, a new brother would answer. You were able to get a flavor of their personalities with each interaction.

“You’re calling for Kevin?” One brother had to repeat twice in great surprise. That one had been Kerry.

“Oh, you must be Y/N. We’ve all heard lots about you.” There would be the sound of rustling, then two people grunting, a loud noise of the phone being dropped, and then finally, Kevin got on the line panting.

“Sorry, that was just Dave messin’ around.”

Kevin would be really protective of you and kind of shield you from his family at first, just like he did with wrestling; he was desperate not to mess anything up and protect what he had. However, eventually you went to visit him in Texas and by this point, his entire family was demanding to meet you.

“If it’s too much just let me know and we can go somewhere just the two of us.” He kept telling you once he picked you up from the airport. “Kevin it’ll be fine! I’ve already talked with your mom on the phone.” “What?” “One day I called and you weren’t there. She’s so nice.”

Kevin was probably more nervous than you. Doris made a great spread for dinner, you joined in with Kevin and his brothers in football, and sat outside in the grass with them, laughing and talking. It went better than expected.

“She’s lovely.” Doris told Kevin when it was just the two of them in the kitchen. He and his mom watched you listen with great interest to Fritz in the living room explain how he got into wrestling, with David and Kerry jumping in with details. Kevin would just smile.

“Yeah…I think she’s the one.”