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hbyrde36 · 3 days

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Inspired by this TikTok

I wrote this instead of everything else I should be working on, enjoy! 😂

Rating: G | WC: 2494 | AO3

Eddie took a deep breath, preparing himself mentally for the night ahead as he walked up the street towards the place he was supposed to meet his blind date.

He couldn’t believe he’d agreed to this, but it wasn’t like he was having any luck finding love on his own.

After several failed long-term relationships with fuckboys that weren’t worth his time and heartache, who ran the second things got real, he joined the apps—quickly realizing that most of the guys he found on there were only looking for sex. Which was fun and all, but Eddie wanted more.

He was looking for romance, a spark, someone he could see spending his life with, who was also looking for a partner. Someone who wasn’t allergic to commitment.

So, he’d quit the apps.

And when Chrissy told him she had a guy she wanted him to meet he figured, fuck it, he’d tried everything else.

Steve Harrington.

He was a friend of Robin’s, Chrissy’s new girlfriend who Eddie hadn’t had the chance to meet yet, but apparently the three of them had gotten together last weekend, and now Chrissy was convinced the man and Eddie were perfect for each other.

“On the surface it’s giving opposites attract,” she’d said, “but under the carefully styled hair and button down shirts, Steve is not at all what you’d expect. He’s kind, funny, a little weird, and way different than the guys you usually go for—but in the best way. Just give it a chance. I promise at the very least you’ll have a good time and maybe make a friend.”

Eddie wasn’t so sure that’d be the case, but he was here, willing to give it a go, and he had a trick up his sleeve. A little idea he’d stolen from a TikTok video that had, so far, a 100% success rate for exposing duds.

He reached his destination and pushed open the door, entering the warm dimly lit restaurant, and before he’d even reached the hostess stand noticed a man rising from his seat, smiling and waving—waving at him.

And oh, oh Chrissy had better count her days because Eddie was going to fucking kill her. Steve, assuming this was the guy, was quite literally the hottest man he’d ever seen in real life.

She couldn't warn a guy?

Eddie raised his hand, absently returning the wave as he continued to stare a little dumbstruck at his date.

Get it together, Munson.

Mercifully, Eddie was able to snap out of it enough to put one foot in front of the other again and make his way over to their booth.

There was an awkward moment where Steve couldn’t seem to make up his mind between shaking Eddie’s hand, or hugging him in greeting.

Honestly Eddie wasn’t sure of the protocol either since it was his first blind date. He supposed this was to be expected. Not only were they about to embark upon the supremely awkward adventure that was every first date ever, but they were also meeting for the very first time having never seen or spoken to each other before.

In the end it became one of those half-and-half bro hugs with the little pat on the back, before they took their seats opposite one another.

Steve was the first to break the silence. “It’s good to meet you, Chrissy told me a lot about you.”

“Wish I could say the same.” Eddie muttered under his breath.

“Oh, um.”

“Sorry, it’s—I didn’t mean,” Eddie shook his head at himself. “Ignore me.”

“No, I'm sorry.” Steve raked a hand over his face. “It’s weird right? This is weird. I tried to tell Robin—I mean, who even goes on blind dates anymore!”

It surprised a laugh out of Eddie that he couldn’t have held back if he tried. He quickly slapped a hand over his mouth, but it was too late.

Great job, Munson, laugh at the guy—great way to make a first impression.

But then Steve was cracking a little lopsided smile, the corners of his eyes crinkling ever-so-slightly with it. He didn’t seem offended, or mad.

Fuck.

He wasn’t just dangerously hot, he was cute too.

Eddie tugged lightly on his shirt collar, and cleared his throat. “It’s a little weird, sure, but that doesn’t mean it’s bad.”

Their server chose that moment to arrive and introduce herself, taking their drink order—some local craft beer Eddie had never heard of for Steve, a Jack and coke for himself—and Eddie used the temporary distraction to try and regain some composure. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t already hoping this would go somewhere, that Steve would be different from all the others.

But when the server had gone and it was just the two of them again, Steve opened his mouth and Eddie instantly flashed back to every bad first date he’d been on.

“So, what’s your favorite—”

Steve hadn’t even finished asking his first question before Eddie was interrupting, raising a hand to tick off each response on his fingers as he went.

“Black, metal, D&D, the 1999 cinematic masterpiece The Mummy starring our lord and savior Brendan Fraser, The Silmarillion, cheeseburgers, Halloween, aaaaand—a dog.”

Steve blinked at him. “...What?”

“My favorite color, genre of music, hobby, movie, book, food, holiday, and of course the classic—if I could be any animal, what animal would I be and why?”

Eddie let his hand fall to the table with a soft thud. “Dog—hands down. And I know I look more like someone who’d say black cat or something like that, but I enjoy attention and physical affection far too much to be an aloof feline. Shaggy lovable mutt seems way more my speed.”

By the end of his speech, Steve was grinning from ear to ear, nodding in understanding.

Eddie gave half a shrug, blushing a bit under the full force of Steve’s dazzling smile. “Thought I'd save us some time and speed-run the same old, same old.”

A moment later their drinks arrived and they both sat up a little straighter reflexively as the server set each glass down on cocktail napkins in front of them before scurrying off.

They’d been leaning in towards each other without even realizing, it seemed. It was Steve’s turn to blush now, Eddie noted with delight as he raised his glass to his lips, grateful to have something to do with his hands.

“I take it you’ve been on a lot of first dates?” Steve asked, taking a long sip from his own drink.

“A few.” Eddie said, tilting his cup to swirl the ice around. “You?”

Steve made a waffling motion with his head. “A few.”

Eddie took another sizable swig from his glass, focusing for a moment on the burn of the whiskey and the tingle of soda bubbles in his throat as he swallowed, and carefully set his cup down on the table between them. It was almost empty already—should have asked for a double.

“Okay, my turn, “ he said.

Steve raised an eyebrow. “You wanna know my favorite color?”

“No, there’ll be plenty of time to find that out later.”

“Presumptuous of you.”

Eddie hummed noncommittally. “More… hopeful.”

Steve let out a breathy laugh. “Alright, what do you want to know?”

Here goes nothing—

“What would you do if we moved in together and I started seeing ghosts and told you that our house was haunted?”

Steve tilted his head to the side, giving Eddie that soft crooked smile again, and damn if it wasn’t becoming one of Eddie’s favorite things. Can you be obsessed with something you’ve only seen twice?

Steve was quiet for a long moment, nearly draining his beer as he thought it over, but eventually set his own drink down beside Eddie’s and looked him dead in the eye. “Is it a nice ghost or a scary ghost? Are we talking banging on walls and rearranging furniture at 3am? Or a cold yet comforting presence in the corner.”

Eddie put on a show of thinking about it, rubbing his chin and staring off into space as he tried desperately to contain his excitement. He’d never had the question go over this well before.

Then their server was back, asking if they wanted another round—yes, of course—and if they were ready to order. They hadn’t even cracked open their menus yet, too distracted with talking.

“Do you know what you want?” Steve asked him.

Eddie swallowed hard.

You.

“I-I’m not picky. Order for me? Chrissy said you come here a lot so I’m sure you know what’s good.”

Without hesitation Steve ordered them a burger each, and a plate of some sort of fancy fries to share, apparently they had the best fries.

It hadn’t been another test, honest. Eddie really didn’t care what he ate, this was already turning out to be his best date in far too long—and It could have been a coincidence, maybe Steve ordered burgers there all the time, but Eddie chose to believe it meant Steve had been listening. Test or not, he’d passed with flying colors.

When they were alone again Eddie smoothed his hands along the table, drawing invisible patterns with his fingers and finally answered Steve’s question.

“Let’s go with scary ghost, but remember you have no proof, you haven't seen it with your own eyes, just my word.”

Steve waved him off as if that was inconsequential, upending his glass to get the last dregs of the beer, and wiping his lips on the back of his hand.

“Okay, well then it depends on how hands on you want to be. We could consult WitchTok, try and cleanse the house ourselves, ask the spirit to leave, that kinda thing. Or maybe find a priest who’d be willing to help us out? That might be a little more difficult since the church isn’t usually our biggest fans, but I could deal with a little homophobia to make sure you were happy and comfortable in our home.”

Eddie’s stomach flipped, heart beginning to race. He wasn’t surprised exactly, Steve had been blowing past his expectations at every turn already, but there was no more perfect answer to his admittedly insane first date question.

So naturally, he had to push.

“What if I wanted to move?”

Steve shrugged. “Then we’d move.”

Eddie stared at him incredulously. Steve said it like it was nothing, like uprooting his entire life for some crazy shit was akin to changing his socks. This was all hypothetical, Eddie knew that, and Steve could just be telling him what he wanted to hear, but Eddie had a feeling he was telling the absolute truth

“But we’d be out, at minimum, a month’s rent and security deposit, and what if the landlord won’t let us out of the lease?!” Eddie threw his hands up, suddenly taking his own game much too seriously. “Or godforbid we’d bought the place, then we’d have to sell it and all our money would be tied up in it, and—”

Steve reached out and took Eddie’s hands with his own, gently stroking his thumbs along the back of them. “Baby—baby it’s okay. No amount of money would be worth you feeling unsafe.”

And Eddie was simply going to pass away, because what the fuck—how was this man so perfect?

“Why—how are you single?”

Steve flashed a sad, self deprecating smile. “I’ve been told I can be a little… intense.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

“Well, historically speaking…”

Eddie leaned over the table, pressing a kiss to the back of Steve’s hand. “I happen to like intense.”

Steve sucked in a breath, cheeks flushing again with the most glorious shade of pink. “Good to know.”

They stayed hand in hand talking for a long time, taking turns asking each other the most random questions they could think of.

“Favorite episode of The Twilight Zone?” Eddie asked.

“Oh, easy. I don’t know the name of it but it’s the one where the kid is lost and her parents can hear her in the house panicking, but they can’t see her?”

Eddie nodded his approval. “Little Girl Lost, good choice.” God he was falling more in love by the second.

“Favorite Abba song.” Steve countered.

Eddie grinned. “How do you know I even have one? Mean scary metalhead like me.”

Steve rolled his eyes, and shot him a look that clearly stated he found Eddie neither mean or scary. “Everybody likes Abba.”

“Well played.” Eddie bit at his bottom lip. He felt like a teenager with his first crush all over again. “Fine—while Dancing Queen holds a special place in my heart, and maybe this makes me a gay cliche, but Gimme, Gimme, Gimme fucking slaps.”

It went on and on like that until eventually their food arrived, forcing them to separate. They still spoke as they finished their meal, and settled their tab, but Eddie missed the warmth of Steve’s hand in his already.

He suddenly understood why some couples chose to sit together on the same side of a booth. He’d happily look like a dork right now to have the opportunity to be pressed up against Steve’s side, to be able to slide a hand along his thigh and maybe—

“Eddie?”

Steve’s slightly raised voice found him in his daydream, snapping him out of it abruptly.

“Wha..?”

“Did I lose you there for a second?” Steve asked, a knowing smile playing on his lips.

Eddie rubbed at the back of his neck nervously. “Yeah, sorry, um—you were saying?”

“I said, I'm having a really good time, and I know we already paid the bill but I really don’t want this night to end, so—” Steve slid out of his seat and moved to stand in front of him, holding a hand out—which Eddie took immediately, of course, and let Steve pull him to his feet.

“I was wondering if you’d want to take this back to my apartment? Y’know, so we can plan a second date?” He finished with a smirk.

Jesus Christ.

Warmth shot through Eddie’s body at the implications but he found his heart skipping a beat too, because as much as Steve was teasing, Eddie knew somehow that he meant it about the second date.

He couldn’t believe his luck, Steve was everything Chrissy had made him out to be, and so much more. He was going to send her the biggest bouquet of flowers tomorrow, and maybe an edible arrangement. Were those still a thing?

Eddie leaned in, letting his lips brush along the shell of Steve’s ear as he spoke. “It’s not haunted, is it?”

Steve shivered, wrapping his arms around Eddie’s shoulders and pulling their bodies flush. “No, but if you’re interested I can think of a few other ways to make you scream.”

Thanks as always to the lovely @penny00dreadful for everything😘😘😘

Permanent taglist(open): @penny00dreadful @pearynice @hitlikehammers @bookworm0690 @wonderland-girl143-blog

@goodolefashionedloverboi @themagicalari

#steddie fanfic #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #steddie #steve x eddie #steve harrington/eddie munson #blind date #modern au #i wrote this in just over 24 hours #do i have wips i should have been working on?#asolutely i do #but this was SO much fun #I gotta write fluff more often #💜💜💜

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ln4swiftie · 23 hours

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lando vs obs

💻 ln4 x streamer!reader

💻 lando has trouble with his recording software but have no fear! his streamer gf is here!

💻warnings : none! just fluff

💻authors note: my ass did NOT edit this very welland i wrote is so quick but here you are!!

you were sat on the couch in landos house watching some cheesy rom-com. your boyfriend was currently filming for a new quadrant video in his office and while you wait for him to finish you decided to get comfy. the video was Max and Lando against two members of the sidemen, Josh and Harry in the new F1 2024 game.

your face was stuffed with popcorn as the movie drowns out the screams coming from down the hall.

“babeee!! can you come help me quickly?” you hear lando shout. you paused the movie sitting up to fix your his hoodie as you make your way to see what he needs. “what’s up?” you ask pushing the door open.

“we just did a whole race and it didn’t record anything...” he replies. his eyes are moving across the screen infront of him with furrowed brows as he try’s to figure out this problem on his own. after a pause he sighs annoyed “can you please come take a look? i don’t understand OBS like you do..”.

You shuffle over to stand behind him and reach down to take the mouse from him. after a brief moment of checking his settings and wandering around landos OBS screen. “oh i see the problem! you haven’t set the game capture to F1 so it’s currently just recording your face.” you explain.

you hear max groan in the headset “so yeah you definitely didn’t record that race, did you?” lando pauses as he watched you navigate OBS to fix the issue and set the right game capture. it always amazed him how you understood all these softwares. “no…” he replies slowly.

hearing Maxs distress you give an idea to pass onto the editors “it’s alright, it should be working now and you can just use footage from the races spectator mode instead of his onboard for that race.” you offer. lando smiles “that’s a great idea, thank you baby!” he kisses your cheek.

you smile back and him giving a quick goodbye to the boys before making your way to the door “it helps having a streamer as a girlfriend doesn’t it!” you hear lando brag into his headset. shaking your head with a laugh you resume back to the couch and cuddle up to press play on the movie as the screaming continues to echo from landos office.

#lando norris fic #lando fluff #lando norris fanfic #lando norris imagine #lando x reader #ln4 #formula 1

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gyllenhaalstories · 3 days

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ALIBI — RUSTY SABICH

summary: rusty seeks comfort in someone from his past to hide from both the present and the future.

warnings: mentions of cheating & the murder, mostly angst, smut (pussy eating, penetration, marking & hickeys, accidental creampie, some elements of noncon). 18+ NO MINORS.

word count: 4075

gif credits: me @/gyllenhaalstories / divider credits: @/firefly-graphics

notes: i was going off the vibes from the trailers but there are spoilers from the first two episodes. this was supposed to be all smut but then i didn't feel like writing smut so it was all angst but then i remembered i'm bad at writing angst so now it's... a mess. sorry? 👓 thank you for reading & REMEMBER TO REBLOG!

The doorbell rang. The noise was so loud that it startled you.

You had been on the edge all day, ever since you received a mysterious letter in your mailbox. The enveloppe was bare, the paper did not look much better. It could have been a bad prank for all you knew, it was not addressed to anyone specifically nor did it have the information required to return it. If it had not been of the familiar penmanship that wrote the words I'll be here at midnight, you would have believed that the letter was completely anonymous.

Rusty stood on the other side of the door, his body completely frozen while his mind and his heart raced faster than ever before. It was a bad idea, one of the worst ideas. He tried to make sure that nobody had followed him, but how could he know? How could he completely be sure there was not a car parked in the darkness of the night?

You ripped the metaphorical bandaid off. "What are you doing here?" You gripped on the door knob tightly, fighting the urge to slam the door back in his face.

He looked down at his feet. "You got my letter."

You were not having any of his misplaced timidity. He reached out, he needed to face the consequences. He needed to face you. So, you stepped out of the way and let him make a decision. Whether he walked away before it was too late, or whether he...

Rusty's shoulder bumped against yours while he made his way into your home. Memories flooded his mind. Memories of the two of you talking, laughing, kissing and...

"What are you doing here?" You repeated, this time with more annoyance in your voice.

He stopped reminiscing the past you shared. "I had nowhere else to go. I have no one else, but..."

"You don't have me either. You made that very clear when you disappeared. It's been so long, I started to believe you forgot I even existed. When was the last time we talked?"

When Carolyn started working. "It's been a long time, I know."

"You know everything, don't you?" You stated and closed the door. Rusty stood there, almost as clueless as you about his presence. You eyed him from head to toes and scoffed.

He flinched, expecting you to go on with another lecture about how he was such a horrible man. You did not, you knew he would like that too much.

You walked towards the living room and crashed on couch, as far as you could be from him. The distance made you feel safer. Only this safety was ephemeral and fragile.

"I, huh... I just," he stuttered and clenched his jaw while trying to compose himself. He pushed his glasses up on his nose. "I needed you."

You scoffed again at the use of past tense. Before you could talk back, he continued.

"I need you."

That confession weighted heavy in the air for several long, agonizing minutes. He came to you. He would have to work hard to get whatever he wanted from you.

Rusty fidgeted with his ring finger. Muscle memory.

You crossed your arms against your chest. You had showed this man more patience than he deserved. "Do you want a hug? Do you want me to tell you everything's gonna be okay?

He glanced in your direction, just long enough for you to notice the glimmer of hope in his eyes.

"I'm not the lawyer who's gonna defend your fake alibi, I'm not the detective who's gonna scrap pieces of evidence for you. I'm not the one who's going to get you out of trouble." You bombarded him with all of these options that he had once considered, crossing them off his list one after the other. "I'm not what you need."

"Yes, you are!" He raised his voice and you lifted a brow at his outburst. He hated being cornered, he hated being on the receiving hand of a tactic he had used one too many times in court. "I need you!" He shouted, he surprised himself.

You blinked and suddenly he was in front of you. He stood, tall but not strong. The louder he yelled, the weaker he felt.

"I need you to help me." You locked eyes with him, daring him to go on. "I need you to help me forget." He did not need to speak her name for you to figure out he was talking about Carolyn.

You laughed at him, as if you were hit with a sudden case of hysteria.

Your reaction made him walk away with his tail between his legs. He sat on the opposite side of the couch.

"You think you're so brave. Huh?" You smiled at him, in complete disbelief. "You were talking shit about how you wanted to leave your wife for me. The worst part is... I believed you." He seemed surprised once again. "Then you left me for another woman who died because of you. And now..." Your smile faded and your arms fell to your sides. "You're crawling back to me because you feel lonely?"

This was a mistake. He thought, he hoped, you would be different. He had enough of people berating him. He sprung to his feet and paced around your living room, planning his next move... His next words.

You chewed on the inside of your cheek while he behaved like an animal in cage. "Rusty..." You sighed, slowly giving in without your own consent. You opened the door of the cage.

"I know you feel lonely too." Rusty clenched his jaw. He stood firm in his word. Suddenly he remembered a conversation he had, not too long ago, about taking responsibility. "And I know I'm asking for a lot." His upper lip curled, his body reacting strangely to this rare case of acknowledgement and awareness. Perhaps it could have been... Guilt.

It was your turn to be surprised. This was uncommon, unnatural. You could not quite decipher if he was genuine or not. The longer you stared at him, studying and scrutinizing him, the harder it became to figure out what was going on inside his head. However, you noticed a shift.

Rusty knew he was getting to you. You no longer had the entire control over this conversation. He reentered your house and your life. While you told him you did not want him back, your body was saying something completely different. You expected him to visit, yet you dressed up so lightly in a shirt that hugged your curves and pants he could easily rip open. You never missed an occasion to drink him in, to appreciate the countless hours he spent at the pool to swim through his thoughts. The tough version of you that opened the door with an anger-filled soul softened up faster than he had imagined.

You eyed him up and down again. "This isn't going to end well." You spoke mostly to yourself. He heard you, but did not acknowledge the bad omen.

Rusty knelt before you. Not once did he break eye contact while he crawled, bringing your words into reality. He leaned back when he reached your legs and waited. He waited for you to tell him no, knowing it would only make him crave it more. Rusty rarely took no for an answer anyway.

You reached your hand to stroke his hair. You waited, too. You waited for him to realize he was taking the wrong decision. You waited to gather enough courage, although you were not too sure what to used that courage for.

He leaned into your hand that slid down to his cheek. You reminded him that the chase of thrills and butterflies could hardly compete with someone who had the magical power of calming him down, of making the whole world disappear.

You leaned forward and reached for his glasses that you gently removed. You took a moment to admire the sight of him: the muscles of his thighs almost bursting through his jeans, his chest heaving as if his hoodie made him so hot that he was melting, his eyes begging for your permission.

He watched you set his glasses away on the couch, safe and sound. He turned his head back to you while you lifted yourself off the couch to take off your sleeping pants. Rusty helped you pull them off, he threw them as far away as he could. He decided for you that there was no turning back. He then placed his hands on your knees, ready to part your legs open.

"I'm gonna regret this." You would, but Rusty would not. You locked eyes with him again and drowned into his darkened gaze. "You better make sure it's worth it."

Rusty faced a dilemma: he was unsure whether he wanted to take his time and savour the moment or dive into it head first. The throb of his cock, confined under his clothes, decided for him.

Your body showed no resistance to his touch, your legs opened easily with the light pressure he applied. His tongue licked a long stripe on your inner thigh while he made his way to your core.

You adjusted your position, sitting more lazily on the couch while he pulled you closer to the edge of the seat. He peppered kisses on your pussy before he used his thumbs to spread it open for him. At the first taste, he was addicted. More so, he was reminded of the addiction that had him sneaking out day and night just to eat you out.

Your back arched, pressing yourself against his mouth when he sucked on your clit. You fought back your moans, but, once again, your body betrayed you.

"Missed you so much," Rusty spoke against your skin. He spat on your pussy and caught the drops that dripped down with his tongue. He made a mess, not that he had to try very hard for it. You were already wet for him, he liked to think it was just a reflex you had failed to break since the day he left. "I missed you so fucking much."

You placed a hand on his head, pulling on his short hair. You refused to believe his words, but they sounded so nice. Almost honest.

Rusty began to lap at your folds, making his nose bump against your clit. He swallowed the juices that leaked from your entrance, but he was still left craving more.

You gasped loudly when his tongue teased your hole. You pressed his face against you, as if he could get even closer than he already was.

Rusty palmed at his rock hard cock, moaning into your pussy as he did that. He touched himself over his clothes while he finally focused on your aching clit, flicking his tongue on it to make you squirm. He tried to fight against the movements of your hips, making sure his mouth never left you.

Your legs started to close around Rusty's face, which did not bother him in the slightest. You struggled to keep your eyes open, to watch him while he brought you closer to the edge. He just looked so beautiful.

The vein on his temple was bulging, almost pulsating to match his heart beat. He let go of his crotch and helped you to put your thighs on his broad shoulders, encourage you to let go, to give in.

You were not ready to satisfy him just yet. You wanted this moment to last, you wanted it to be worth the guilt and regret you would experience the moment he would walk out the door.

That only made him hungrier. He devoured you like it was the last time, he shared the mutual feeling that it could very well be. He pulled away from you just long enough to catch his breath one last time. He was determined to get what he wanted from you.

In a matter of seconds, your vision got blurry and your toes started to curl.

Rusty's moans only made the sensations greater while his tongue worked you over and had your entire body shaking for him.

You did not need to speak, to tell him to keep going, he knew what to do. He knew how to make you feel better than anyone else ever could. That remained one of his biggest problems, he was a heartless cheater but he was just so fucking good at it.

He slowed down until your thighs relaxed around him and he helped to set them down, still wide open for him to admire the mess he made between your thighs. You were dripping of your own wetness and of his spit. He could have kept going all night, but he had a more urgent need to take care of. He scrambled back on his feet and, without a word, he took off the rest of his clothes.

You did the same, not without admiring his body and especially the throbbing and leaking cock that he stroked.

He admired you too: the way your clit throbbed for him, how your forehead was covered with a layer of sweat despite just sitting there and doing nothing besides screaming while you were cumming.

He surprised you with a rough kiss, all tongue and teeth. You did not want to reciprocate, you wanted to pull away and to protect yourself from falling harder for this man. It was simply pointless. You kissed him back with the same passion that left you both gasping for air.

Rusty helped you to change positions so that you turned around and you were kneeling on the couch and you leaned on the back of the furniture. He leaned forward to kiss your shoulder and all the way down your back. He wanted to print the memory of you in his mind.

Neither of you felt brave enough to speak. You let your bodies do the talking with moans and grunts that blended into a melody while Rusty pressed the tip of his cock to your entrance. His tongue failed to prepare you for the delicious stretch of his cock.

He squeezed your ass cheeks open, trying to catch a glimpse of your pussy gripping on him. That was the prettiest thing he had ever seen. He helped you arch your back, taking in the perfect position for him to use your pussy to get off. You felt so fucking good, so tight and wet around him. How could he have waited so long to feel you again? How did he manage to wait all this time?

You bit on your lip so hard that it tasted faintly of blood when he bottomed out. He stopped moving for a few moments, letting you adjust to him.

He pressed his toned chest against your back, cooing at you. When he felt your walls relax around his length, he started moving. The small but deep thrusts made tears pool into your eyes.

You held on the back of the couch for dear life when he fucked you harder, when he let you feel every inch of him nice and deep.

Rusty grunted louder and louder. The noises echoed in your apartment, filling the silence alongside the sound of your skin slapping against his. He was getting closer than he wanted to to admit it, so he stalled again.

You felt his hands on your skin, gliding down your arms. He held your hands in his, making the cushion of the couch cave in under the pressure. You looked down at his left hand, but your eyes closed blissfully before you could notice whether he was wearing his wedding ring or not. Your skin was so hot too, you could not even feel it the metal.

You could not feel anything else than Rusty's cock that was balls deep inside of you or his lips that sucked a few marks on your shoulder.

He kissed his way to your neck, where he nibbled and licked. He was buying time and you could feel it. You could hear it too, with the whimpers that came out of his mouth. He murmured at your ear while he marked you. "I’m gonna… I’m gonna cum."

"Pull out, just, fuck," your voice sounded hoarse from the moans. "Just pull out!"

Rusty cursed under his breath, his thrusts felt more like twitches than anything. His left hand moved down to squeeze on your hip, a rough and bruising grip. "I can’t," his body pressed down on yours. You could barely stay up on your knees. "You feel too fucking good on me."

"No! No, no…" You wanted to get him to move, or even to get off him. Anything really, but your pussy clenched on him with vice-like grip. It was already too late.

Rusty held your hip and your hand tight, giving you no room to escape. He grunted at your ear while he emptied himself in you. Multiple ropes of cum coated your walls and made both yours and his eyes roll to the back of your heads. It felt so good, so wrong yet so right. He should not have done it, he should have pulled out and avoid another situation. He never learned his lessons. This was forbidden. He loved it even more.

"Rusty! That was so fucking stupid." You shouted, there was more shock than anger in your voice. Your poor attempts at squirming out of his embrace failed. Your pussy milked him to his last drop.

The room went painfully silent. No moans, no skin slapping, no couch squeaking. Nothing. There was nothing but erratic breaths and the gears turning silently in your minds. What did he do? He did what he needed to do. He did what he knew you wanted him to do. Even if you told him otherwise, even if you tried to convince yourself of the opposite. "I'm sorry."

It was crystal clear that his apology was empty. As if the lack of conviction in his voice was not enough to prove it, the slow thrusts of his hips sealed the deal.

Languid strokes that made him appreciate the warmth he had craved for so long. "I know, this was wrong." He pressed his clean shaven cheek against yours. Slowly, he picked up the pace until he properly fucked you against the couch. "I'm so fucking sorry." He punctuated each word with a thrust that made you moan louder and louder. He was not going to stop anytime soon. He fucked his cum so deep inside of you until he was ready for a second load.

Only Rusty could fuck you this good. He made sure you learned that lesson, rewarding you with orgasms the more you surrendered to the pleasure he shamelessly gave you.

*~*~*

You felt Rusty's arm slide away from your body, goosebumps spreading on your skin from the sudden lack of warmth. You tried to stay immobile, although your eyes fluttered from struggling to stay closed. You knew he would leave. He always did.

He knew he would leave. He could not stay. He could not stay and drag you down with him once more. Rusty had hurt enough people for the time being, he needed to learn to be careful. To calculate the risks. The risks were too high when they involved you.

A part of you had hoped it would be different this time. Maybe he would stay for breakfast. Maybe he would offer to shower together and go at it again. Maybe he would make another promise he would inevitably break.

Rusty surprised you with a kiss to your cheek, one that lingered and communicated more than words could convey in the moment. He stood up on his tired legs and he stepped over your body to search for his clothes.

You opened your eyes a bit, squinting to catch a glimpse of his naked body roaming around your place. He looked so beautiful, so irresistible. His large back, his muscular legs, his toned ass that he quickly covered with his boxers. You could admire him for days on end. He would never grant you so much time in his presence.

He turned around, guilt and regret stabbed him in the stomach. Unfamiliar feelings. You looked so beautiful, so tempting. The delicate features of your face, the curves of your body, your steady breathing that he'd love to fall asleep to again. He wished he could stay with you and forget about the rest of the world.

You felt his eyes on you. You felt him stare and linger on the marks he left on your body, on the other places he'd love to bruise for his own pleasure.

Before he got riled up and, most importantly, before he failed once more to think with his brain, he finished dressing up in a hurry. If he made it back home before sunrise, no one would know about his escapade.

"Wait." Your mouth spoke despite your mind yelling at you to stay quiet and to pretend to sleep a little longer.

Rusty froze in place. He refused to turn around and look at you. Unless you asked him to.

You sat up, wrapping the blanket around your body that he had seen one too many times; your body that he could not even see in the moment. You used the blanket as a shield. An armour to brace for the upcoming impact. "Is she," you cut yourself off. "Was she special?"

You watched his torso rise and fall from the several deep breaths he took before answering. "Very." He did not need one more interrogation, one more trial.

You nodded slowly. "Am I special?"

You watched him experience a myriad of emotions, just by the change in his breathing and how his body tensed up while he searched for an honest answer. This question was a trap.

"Very." He repeated in a whisper. "The most special."

You snickered. His answer felt like just as much of a trap as the question you asked. If you had been the most special to him, why did he pursue Carolyn? Why did he have this grand affair with her and not with you? Why did he risk everything for her and not for you?

As if he could hear the questions running through your mind, he spoke again. "You're the only person I've tried my hardest to protect." He referred to his children that he hurt and sacrificed, to his wife that he lied to and cheated on... To his mistress who died because of his insatiable lust.

It was only then that you finally accepted to face the truth: nobody knew who you were, in relation to Rozat Sabich. He kept you in the shadows, he locked you in a cage. He protected you in this bubble of stolen kisses and broken promises.

If nobody knew that you two shared a long and complex history, he would never have to involve you in this situation more than he already did the night before. He would not need yet another alibi to cover up the messy trail he left behind.

You held your head in your hands. You hated to see him leave, each time felt like it got closer to being the last time he would walk out of your life for good.

Rusty put on his hoodie and fixed his glasses. He was now facing you, but it was his turn to need an armour so he maintained the distance between the two of you. He stared at you, time felt like it had stopped. His lips parted open to speak, but no sound came out of his mouth.

However, you turned to look at him just in time to catch him mouth the dangerous words I love you. You smiled sadly at him with a tear falling down the same cheek he kissed. It was your way to say I love you too.

And just like that, Rusty opened the door and left without another glance in your direction. The wall between the two of you built itself back up in an instant. That way, he protected you from the world. Most importantly, he protected you from himself. All the history between the two of you would remain a secret.

You were his best kept secret.

#jake gyllenhaal #rusty sabich #rusty sabich smut #jake gyllenhaal smut #presumed innocent #jake gyllenhaal imagine #rusty sabich imagine #rusty sabich x reader #jake gyllenhaal x reader

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joequiinn · 15 hours

Text

The Dos & Don'ts of Fake Dating | E.M. x reader | pt. 9

[chap eight] | [all chapters here]

ummary: You propose a crazy idea to the resident freak of Hawkins, Eddie Munson. But maybe he was even crazier for agreeing to it…

notes & tropes: fem reader, slow burn, faking dating, opposites attract, bratty rich bitch reader, super minor revenge plot, not-quite-enemies-to-lovers

a/n: Me?? Taking another unexpected writing hiatus?? Never. But forreal, you all know how life gets. So, as a treat here's a longer chapter (that may or may not be a bit rambly) to make up for my absence. As I wrote, this just kept going and going, so I hope you all enjoy the extra few thousand words lmao

wc: 8.6k

Chapter Nine

The rest of Monday was absolute shit following your fight with Eddie. After spending the entirety of lunch break hiding out under the bleachers in an attempt to pull yourself together, facing your peers for the rest of the day was the last thing you wanted. The trek to your fifth period class was like some walk of shame, as if you were wearing some damned scarlet letter; it felt as if the entire school was watching you, waiting to see if you’d make yourself look like an idiot again or if you’d erupt. You had never felt so scrutinized before, so susceptible to judgment, but you fought tooth and nail not to give people the reaction they were hoping for.

The next day wasn’t any better. Once again, you felt the weight of everyone’s attention, you felt the pressure of all their judgment. Was this how it felt to be in Eddie’s shoes, how it felt to be a total social outcast? It was even shittier than you could have predicted, and you found yourself questioning the stupid little plan you and Eddie had been hatching that led to this.

It only grew worse as the day went on. Third period was arguably the most frustrating - you were stuck sitting next to Eddie for a whole damn hour, and he didn’t speak a single word to you. You didn’t even think it was possible for that boy to go quiet for longer than a few minutes, yet he proved you wrong, keeping his mouth zipped tight and his eyes on anything but you. Being ignored by Eddie caused your anger to flare, and if you had less self control you would’ve said something about it, would’ve given him a piece of your mind, but your frustrations had kept you, too, surprisingly silent. Or maybe it was the fear of looking stupid again.

Wednesday continued much the same way, although you felt less frustrated by everyone’s critical glances and Eddie’s willful ignorance of your existence. You thought maybe you were starting to get your shit together, that you had finally combatted all your pent up emotions and pushed them all the way down to the pit of your heart, where you'd just ignore them like you did with any challenging feelings. Hell, you were even beginning to fool yourself into thinking that you were feeling better, though deep down you knew that wasn’t true.

The worst that the week had to offer came during lunch that day, though, when you foolishly tried to approach Duncan and demand to know what the hell his deal was. You thought you had pulled yourself together well enough - you spoke with a sharp tone and a cool demeanor, but he and his gang of friends simply mocked your attempts at an argument. They did everything they could to make you feel small, but you kept it together, retreating from their harsh words with all the poise you could muster, hoping that your anger wasn’t too obvious. Their laughter and whispers wouldn't get to you, or at least you'd never show it - the whole school already saw you vulnerable once, it was not about to happen again.

Consider your reputation officially fucking ruined.

The thing that hurt more than any of their insults and derogatory words, however, was the look on Eddie’s face as you two met eyes across the lunch room, the way he watched you as you tried to march away from Duncan with your pride still intact. Eddie had been witness to the entire shitty interaction, you realized as you kept your eyes locked on his; the worry and concern so clear on his face caused a crack in your otherwise icy exterior, and you had to rip your gaze away so he couldn't see the hurt in your expression. You nearly broke down the very moment you were out of the cafeteria, the look on Eddie’s face burned into your mind.

The rest of the day was a fucking blur, and you were so emotionally worked up that you were grateful to leave school and go to the one place that could normally calm you down - the ice rink. Wednesday was always your skating day, and today you felt like you needed it more desperately than usual, thankful to spend a few hours on the ice after school. In all your moments of frustration, skating always did wonders to even you out, reminding you why you still enjoyed it after all these years - it helped calm your nerves, clear your head, and relax your heart. It helped to de-escalate your emotions, to make you think straight, and after how hard the past couple of days were, you desperately needed that.

Your anger at Duncan was still burning hot as ever, and even as you slowly relaxed you were still desperate to get back at him, not above stooping to his level. You’d have to corner him when he was alone, without his posse to back him up - then you could really hurt him with your scathing words. You also couldn’t help but wonder just how involved Amelia and Janet were in all this shit - if anything, this stunt was Amelia’s idea, but Janet? She couldn’t have been this cold and heartless; or maybe you just desperately hoped she wasn't.

As you looped around the ice far less elegantly than you normally would, you tried your damnedest not to think about Eddie, as if ignoring the thought of him would somehow remove you from fault. Now that you’ve actually had time to think about it, you knew you’d been mean to him just for the sake of it, just to let your frustrations out on someone. A younger you wouldn't have cared that you mistreated someone, would've just waved it off like a brat and moved on with your life. Hell, only a few months ago, you probably would've still found it comical to talk down to someone like Eddie the way that you did.

But you were not that girl anymore, although you also weren't emotionally ready to acknowledge that Eddie didn’t deserve your vitriol; after all, you were mean to just about everyone, what made him any different? You knew that you’d treated him badly simply because it was easy, because he was the only person there and you needed to let it out. The less prideful part of you knew that you were wrong for that, but that side of you had thus far been outweighed by your own stubbornness. Now, however, you were starting to think maybe you needed to do something about it.

On the one hand, you considered that you had no obligation to make things right with Eddie, and yet, something about that upset you. Were you really so terrible and bitchy that you’d avoid apologizing to him? Were you going to simply ignore him, if not treat him even worse than you’d already had been? That’s certainly something you would have done in the past, but somehow Eddie fucking Munson had made you a little less harsh than you once were.

No, you didn’t need to make this right, but you wanted to. Somehow, Eddie had undeniably grown on you, and at this rate he was virtually the only person you had on your side (that is, of course, if you don’t take into account his ignoring you the past two days). If anyone had even suggested a month ago that you’d be getting along so well with Eddie Munson, you probably would have gagged. What could you and a guy like him possibly have in common, what could you two possibly bond over? These were questions that you were still seeking answers to, even as you drove home after hours of skating at the rink.

Perhaps it was your sense of humor, so much more aligned with his than either of you had expected. Or maybe it was the effortlessness with which you could talk to one another, like you’d already known each other far longer than a few weeks. Hell, maybe it was that Eddie challenged you without even being mean about it, how he so simply gave you new perspectives to take into account and made you reconsider things you thought you knew.

It was strange to realize that, in your own way, you two had become almost-friends quite rapidly. Was that normal? Did other people feel so at ease with someone they’d known for only a few short weeks? You couldn’t remember what it was like when you became friends with Amelia or Janet or anyone else that ran in your former circle - had you bonded with them just as easily as you had with Eddie? Something in you suspected no.

But you tried to avoid thinking about that too much, because you certainly weren’t going to dig into it any deeper.

As you walked through the front door of your home, the silence of the house confirmed to you that your father was still, supposedly, at work. The only time you heard the buzz of electronics throughout the house was when he was around, because your mom never left a television or radio on unnecessarily. You’d bet that she was probably in the kitchen with the radio down low, just a bit of background noise to keep her company as she prepped for dinner. Or maybe she was on the phone in the home office, chatting away with one of her friends about the latest gossip in town.

You hated to admit it, but you and your mom were both used to your father not being around often - most days, he was gone before you left for school and didn’t return home until well into the evening. This had been the family’s routine for years now, so your father’s lack of interest in spending time at home no longer phased you. His absence was just as routine as your school schedule or your mom’s biweekly nail appointments.

You found it far more surprising when he was around - in fact, it almost dared to make you suspicious of him. Because you figured he never seemed interested in spending time with you or your mom, you couldn’t help but speculate what would prompt him to suddenly spend every night at the dinner table for a couple weeks, or to even suggest the family go out together on the weekend. You assumed it was some form of guilt - for a while now, you had yourself convinced that he was having an affair, so perhaps his brief bouts of attentiveness were his measly efforts to reconcile his infidelity with himself.

Of course, you’d never dare even imply this suspicion to your mother, for all you knew it could send her spiraling. And a part of you was convinced that perhaps she’d had her suspicions as well.

As you closed the front door behind you and slid out of your sneakers, you had every intention of running off to your room to avoid your mom entirely. After the week you’d had thus far, you’d rather be left alone, you didn’t want to get caught up in her usual superficial conversations. But before you could even take a step towards the staircase, your mom zipped out of the kitchen towards you, an eager shine in her eyes that almost made her appear younger. You gave her a quizzical look, taking a step back as she got just a little closer than you cared for; even with your parents, you preferred people stay at arm’s length.

“How was your day, hon?” She asked as if in anticipation of something. Your face twisted with even more confusion - what the hell was she so excited about? Was she really that oblivious to the funk you’d been in the past three days?

You stepped around your mom, intending to end this conversation quickly so you could disappear to your room. Your tone was dismissive as you replied coldly, “Not great.”

Her joy seemed to falter a little as she followed just a step behind you; clearly, whatever she wanted to talk about seemed to be important to her, “What do you mean?”

You paused to look back at her again, your agitation clear on your face as you studied her. You weren’t certain, but it seemed as if she were expecting a different response - a particular response. What exactly was she fishing for?

“Today sucked. Just like the rest of this shitty week.” Your tone was cold as you raised your brow, hoping that your attitude may deter her from asking anymore questions. Your callous word choice caused her to pull a face, studying your expression as if she were seeing you for the first time in a long time. For a moment, you thought maybe she’d actually act like your mother, you thought maybe she’d ask you what was wrong and offer a shoulder to cry on.

“I figured it’d be good,” she started with concern in her voice, putting on something of an encouraging smile, “considering the assembly on Monday.”

Dread immediately washed over you, her words causing your heart to drop into your stomach - how did she know about the assembly? The school wouldn’t have called the parents about it, they didn’t care that much. Maybe one of her friends had heard from their kid and then told her? Possibly, but not the most likely. So, how did she know?

All you could do was stare for a few tense moments, fighting to keep in all the feelings you’d just worked through on the ice rink. Your jaw tightened as you swallowed hard, attempting to quiet your mind and take a deep breath. Your intense eyes burned into your mother, who seemed to recognize that what she’d just said may have been a mistake.

“How do you know about that?” You probed with an edge to your voice, feeling as if all your emotions were going to come spilling out of you at any minute.

Although she appeared hesitant, your mom kept her composure, persisting to act bright in the foolish hopes that it would help you relax, “Amelia called while you were out.”

If your heart could drop any further, it would have. You began to feel almost out of body as you started to piece it all together, already realizing Amelia’s fucking game. She knew you wouldn’t have mentioned your dissolved friendship to your mother because of your distant relationship with your parents, and now she was using it against you. To what end? Simply to torment you more?

Receiving no response from you, your mother smiled encouragingly, still trying her hardest to keep things chipper as she continued, “She wanted to know if I’d like to be a chaperone for homecoming. She seemed so excited that both of you were nominated for homecoming queen!”

Your jaw clenched in anger, eyes growing harsher as they burnt into your mother. You had no reason to be mad at her, but at that moment your rage was coming back up, clawing its way out of you. It took everything in your power not to shout expletives in her face.

So, you turned away from her, trying to collect yourself by taking a few deep breaths. From over your shoulder, your mom continued, trying in vain to understand what was going on with you, “Honey, what’s wrong? This should be exciting news.”

You whipped around angrily, but bit your tongue as you two stared at one another, you in vexation and your mom in concern. You took one more deep breath while rolling your eyes, looking away again.

“Did Amelia tell you who I was nominated with? Or that we haven’t spoken a word to each other in nearly two weeks?” As your frustration bubbled, you met her eyes again, “Or that I was only nominated as some shitty prank? Did she mention that I ran out of the gym like a fucking coward because of how humiliated I felt?”

Your mother’s face was awash with concern as she looked between your eyes, and for a moment you really did think she’d comfort you, in fact, you were almost hoping for it. But that was quickly squashed, “Will you please watch your language? You don’t have to get so worked up.”

The upset on your face only increased - despite everything else you said, your language was the thing that concerned her most? You scoffed with frustration, shaking your head in disbelief as you all but shoved past her, keeping your wild eyes away from hers.

“You don’t even care!” You said venomously, stomping back towards your belongings left by the front door. Haphazardly, you shoved your feet into your shoes and dug around for your keys, “I’m not good right now, mom, and all you’re worried about is my fucking language! Do you care how I’m feeling?”

With a flustered look, your mom approached you, “Of course I care, but I can’t even understand you anymore! You’ve been so different recently, so much more distant. How am I supposed to know what’s going on if you won’t tell me?��

You simply shook your head, throwing your bag back on your shoulder once you had your keys. As you swung open the front door, it bounced off the wall, causing your mother to gasp at the aggressive act.

“Where are you going!?” She insisted while following you outside. You didn’t dare look back, marching towards your car as your anger continued to bubble over.

“Anywhere but here!” As you whipped around to the driver side door, you finally looked at your mother, who lingered on the front steps with a disappointed and confused expression. You were sure you looked absolutely wild and irate as you flung open the car door, carelessly tossing your bag inside and holding your mother’s gaze.

You could see that she was trying to make sense of the chaos happening right now, trying her best to keep it together as if that would calm you down now after everything that just happened. She wasn’t used to seeing you like this, so emotional and out of control - she’d seen you angrier these past couple weeks than you’d been your entire fucking life.

“Please just come back inside.” She tried earnestly, but you were too far gone to hear any of it. You ripped your gaze from hers and slammed the car door once you were settled into the seat, zipping out of the driveway fast enough that you nearly hit the mailbox.

You didn’t make it far, though, having to pull over only a minute later because you realized you were on the verge of crying. Fuck, when was the last time that had happened? You were never the type to get emotional like this, but shit, you’d had a stressful week. You had to catch your breath, to hold back your tears of anger, slamming your fists on the steering wheel a few times as if that could make everything better. You didn’t dare let a single tear roll down your face, but they were so welled up in your eyes that you could barely see, forcing you to blink and wipe them away.

What the hell were you doing? Where did you expect to go? These melodramatics felt fucking ridiculous, and you tried to convince yourself you were freaking out over nothing, although your emotions were clearly telling you otherwise. You couldn’t keep acting like this, you wouldn’t allow it - it wasn’t you, and it made you feel weak.

But shit, you felt like your world had been crashing down around you all week, and it was impossible to keep it together right now. So, you pounded your fists against the dashboard, hissing foul words while continuing to fight back everything that was swirling in your chest. You were certain that if any of your neighbors walked by your haphazardly parked car, they’d think you were having a total mental break. And maybe you were; fuck if you knew. You weren’t exactly thinking clearly right now.

After what felt like an eternity, you’d exhausted all your rage, dejectedly catching your breath and attempting to regain your composure. Shit, what were you going to do now? There’s no way in hell you’d go back home - you weren’t ready to deal with your mother again so soon. Or worse, your father, whose temper would simply set you off again.

As you swallowed down the lump in your throat, you couldn’t help but think of your fight with Eddie, and without any hesitation you accepted that right now you missed him. If you weren't so emotional, you'd have stopped to consider how strange that was. Maybe the past few days wouldn’t have been such shit if you’d just been nicer to him; maybe this was karma at work, making you miserable for how you treated him.

You had to apologize to Eddie. Right fucking now.

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

As you drove through Forest Hills, you realized you’d never once set foot in a trailer park before. Looking out your windshield at the dark street, you were certain that one trailer home would maybe fill only two bedrooms of your own home. How people lived in such close quarters was something you couldn’t even comprehend, and on a normal night maybe you would’ve lingered on that thought. But considering that you came here on a mission, you were unable to become distracted; no, the anxiety that was rapidly growing in your chest kept you laser focused on the task you set out on.

It wasn’t until you reached this side of Hawkins that your fear began to mount - should you really be showing up to Eddie’s place unannounced? Is this terrible timing? What if his uncle was home? The further into Forest Hills you drove, the more worried you became. For all you knew, Eddie would slam the door in your face, tell you to fuck off and leave him alone. And after all the shit you’d dealt with this week, you couldn’t handle any more rejection.

Maybe you should just turn around and get out of here while you still have the chance.

But as that thought crossed your mind, you spotted Eddie’s van in front of one of the trailers, and your heart rate sped up to a frankly concerning pace. Shit, it was now or never. Turn back around and head home or face Eddie and his possible rejection. Frankly, both options sounded fucking awful.

For a few long moments, you simply lingered on the road, staring at Eddie’s trailer as your heart drummed in your chest; your eyes roved over the illuminated windows, half expecting to see Eddie’s silhouette appear in one of them any second now. But when no visual indicator of him appeared, you shook yourself back to the present, pulling up alongside his van with the brief thought that maybe he saw your headlights. You hesitated at that, waiting yet again to see if he’d appear in the window or at the door. Fuck, if you were going to be this nervous, you might as well just get out of here.

But you knew you couldn’t do that. You knew you had to talk to Eddie again, you had to have at least one decent relationship in your life right now. Considering that he was the closest thing you had to a friend at the moment, you had to make amends with him. Not that Eddie owed you any forgiveness, of course - again, the fear that he’d want nothing to do with you came creeping back up, even as you pulled the keys from the ignition and slowly stepped out of the car.

Fuck, what were you going to do if Eddie didn’t want to talk? You didn’t think you could manage to survive the rest of the week if he didn’t forgive you. Despite trying to ignore the thought, in a way you realized that right now you needed Eddie.

This shit better work.

You felt almost shaky as you approached the front door, hearing thrashing metal music reverberating inside the trailer. You had to take another pause at the door to collect yourself - you were not nervous like this, and you refused to appear this nervous in front of anyone. You were here to apologize, not to be vulnerable. So, you pulled yourself together with a few deep breaths, marching up to the door and knocking strongly before you could think to hesitate any longer. Considering how loud the music was, you realized Eddie probably didn't hear you, so you roughly pounded your fist against the door once again. You put on a brave face, taking one more deep breath as the music quieted and someone approached the door.

Of course, once you and Eddie locked eyes, you suddenly froze. All the things you’d rehearsed on the way over here momentarily left your head as you took in his surprised expression, the look in his eyes that suggested you were the last person he expected to see on his doorstep. For what felt like hours, the two of you stared at one another as you attempted to collect your thoughts, attempted to keep all your hurt from showing on your face.

You eventually had to rip your eyes away from Eddie, maybe then you could finally find your voice again. As you stared at his feet, you straightened out your back and clenched your jaw, trying to quiet your mind and get out at least one coherent thought. With a deep breath, you flicked your gaze back to his face.

“Can we talk?” Your voice came out strong, if not a little cold - good, at least you didn’t sound as weak as you’d been feeling recently.

Eddie’s expression was still a little taken aback, even as he tried to put on a calm, collected air. Had you not caught him so off guard, perhaps you would’ve been fooled by the lazy smirk he gave you or his seemingly relaxed posture. But given the look of near astonishment that was on his face only a moment prior, you knew he was probably just as unprepared for this conversation as you were.

“Well, since you drove all the way here…” Eddie trailed off in what was meant to be a casual tone, stepping to the side and nodding his head towards the trailer behind him. You looked between his eyes and the entryway for a moment before stepping up into his home, immediately taking it all in attentively - it was easier to focus on your surroundings than to focus on him and your emotions.

You weren’t sure what you had expected of Eddie’s home, but as you stood in his small living room, everything appeared exactly as it should have - the place was cozy, decorated with items that were clearly personal, reflecting the taste of someone so unlike your own family. Back in your own home, the art on the wall was perfectly curated by your mother, the only photos being staged family portraits; the furniture was also meticulously decided on, meant to look cohesive and clean and modern.

Here in the Munson trailer, the space actually felt lived in - the coffee table was stacked with car magazines and western paperbacks, the walls adorned with collections of hats and mugs. The furniture was worn from years of use, the kitchen was cluttered, a fold out bed was pushed off to one side - yes, this home actually had life to it, unlike the stale living environment you were so used to. Without having met the man, you already had a strong sense of Eddie’s uncle just by looking around the place.

The more you looked at the Munson home, the more your curiosity grew - you wanted to ask more about Eddie and his uncle and all the little details that made them a family. But before you could get to know any more about Eddie, first you had to actually make things right with him. So, you turned your attention back to him, briefly catching the self-conscious look on his face that he very quickly corrected - did he feel judged, having you in his home like this? Was he worried what you’d think now that you had this more intimate glimpse at his life?

The two of you stared at one another for a few long moments; Eddie was clearly anticipating what you’d say next, and you were still trying to decide where exactly to start. You raised a brow as you let out a breath, forcing yourself to look away again so you could actually speak - looking Eddie in the eye like this made it harder to apologize.

“I shouldn’t have acted like that.” You started, letting your gaze continue to roam over trinkets and decor in the living room. Off to your side, you heard Eddie hum in acknowledgement instead of saying anything, which seemed to be your cue to continue. You sighed a little, forcing yourself to be honest, hard as it may be; your voice was a touch quieter as you added, “You didn’t deserve that shit.”

“No, I didn’t.” Eddie responded with a hint of harshness to his tone, but considering the circumstances, he didn’t sound nearly as mad as you’d expected. You slowly spun around, looking anywhere but his direction so your words would come more easily.

“I… like having you around.” The sentence sounded juvenile to your ears, but you simply continued, “I know all I wanted was to stir shit up and be left alone, but the past couple days--”

You had to cut yourself off, suddenly feeling a sadness well up in your throat - you were not about to break, not right now, not in front of Eddie. So, you swallowed hard and tried to calm down before he could see the chink in your armor.

“Not so fun being on the other side of things, huh?” Eddie chimed in, saving you from yourself with his comment. You turned to him with a nod, hoping your eyes didn’t give too much away.

“Fucking sucks, actually.” You managed a small, sad smile. It looked as if Eddie, too, wanted to mirror the expression, but he kept it to himself. You took in his posture, his crossed arms and guarded look, hoping that you were getting through to him.

You let out a sigh, your gaze drifting down to the floor as you struggled to find your words. God, being sincere shouldn’t be so damn hard, but you were never one to admit your faults, never the type to open up easily. Despite your usual confidence and brashness, you couldn’t even seem to form proper sentences right now.

“I forgive you.” Those three simple words drew a surprised look from you, to which Eddie shrugged as he continued, looking away with a coolness that surely had to be for show, “Your apology could use some work, seeing as you couldn’t even say ‘sorry,’ but you were forgiven the second I opened that door.”

That last statement was shockingly honest and somehow a touch too vulnerable for your liking - it made you nervous, and you couldn’t say why. Was Eddie just being hyperbolic, saying that to make you feel better? Or was it the truth, could he have possibly been willing to forgive you just like that simply because you showed up on his doorstep? Both of those ideas made you apprehensive in vastly different ways.

With a quick shake of your head, you tried to pull yourself together, straightening your shoulders and wiping the vulnerable look from your face. You met Eddie’s kind eyes with as much coolness as you could muster, hoping it wasn’t too obvious that you were relieved with how this conversation had gone. There was a glint of amusement in Eddie’s face as he watched you, as if he knew exactly what was going through your head, as if he knew your calm demeanor was all for show.

Eddie looked down, rubbing the back of his neck as he spoke, “So long as you don’t drag me to that stupid homecoming, we’ll be alright.”

You couldn’t help but scoff and roll your eyes at the suggestion, thankful that Eddie made the effort to break the tension in the room - you were done trying to be vulnerable, and it seemed that he could sense that, too.

“As if I’d let myself be the Carrie White of their shitty joke.” You gave Eddie a playful glance, catching the way his brow furrowed.

“Carrie, huh?”

You also gave him a look, “Yeah, you know - telekinetic chick who killed everyone at prom?”

The smile that graced Eddie’s lips was nearly infectious as he laughed with a shake of his head, “Oh, I know Carrie, I’m just surprised that you do - you don’t seem the horror type.”

You cross your arms teasingly - it was so easy to fall back into this pattern with Eddie, easy to bounce off each other. Admittedly, you missed it.

“There’s still a lot you don’t know about me.” You counter with a small smirk, to which Eddie gave you a challenging look.

“Well, it would help if you opened up a little more, princess.” The nickname rolled off Eddie’s tongue with ease, and it was a relief to hear it - that had to mean you really were forgiven, that he hadn't just said so to make you feel better. Even still, you narrowed your eyes, prompting Eddie to continue in his defense, “I know nothing about your hobbies, but you know practically all of mine.”

You looked him up and down once, “You know that I skate.”

Eddie rolled his eyes teasingly, although he sounded deathly serious as he said, “There’s clearly more to you than that.”

The sincerity in Eddie’s tone juxtaposed his playful look, giving you pause, making you nervous. You answered simply and with a dismissive shrug, hoping it didn't lead into some deeper conversation, “Guess that makes you the first person to notice.”

You turned away from Eddie to continue looking around, taking in the room as you debated whether or not you’d elaborate on your interests. Considering that Eddie made a good point about not knowing you well, you caved - after all, did you want him as a friend or not?

“I love horror movies.” You take a few steps towards a shelf filled with videos and cassettes, your eyes slowly looking over the titles, “Books, too, but the movies are way scarier, so they’re more fun.”

A few familiar horror titles sat on the shelf, causing you to grin and glance back at Eddie, who seemed to be watching you attentively. Realizing he was caught staring, he quickly righted himself and met your gaze, his curious smile growing. You could see in his face that questions were forming, that he probably wanted to ask what you liked about horror or what movie was your favorite. Expectantly, you turned to face him with an eager raise of your brow.

Eddie looked between your eyes for a moment as if he wasn’t sure what to say first, finally nudging his chin towards the VHS collection on the shelf, “You pick a movie, I’ll order us a pizza?”

You couldn’t help but be surprised at the suggestion - for two days you didn’t speak a word to each other, but again you were reminded of just how effortless it was to go back to the way things were. You smiled in appreciation for Eddie’s ability to make anything easy like this.

As much as you loved the idea, you hesitated, “It’s getting kinda late…”

Eddie waved it off before you could say anything else, “So? My uncle won’t be back for hours, and I don’t think either of us has anything better going on.”

So, you nodded, eagerly turning your attention back to the small collection of movies on the shelf - you wondered which ones were Eddie’s and which were his uncle’s. Quickly, you settled on a movie that you were excited to see there, grabbing it from the shelf and spinning to face Eddie as he dialed the nearest pizza place. You felt like an excited child as you held up Videodrome for him to see. Again, Eddie appeared surprised, but didn’t get the chance to comment as he was greeted by someone on the other end of the call. He probably wouldn’t have guessed Cronenberg to be your taste in horror.

With the pizza ordered and the movie loaded into the VCR, you and Eddie settled on opposite ends of the couch. Within a minute of the movie starting, however, you couldn’t help yourself as you began to eagerly go on and on about how technically impressive the effects in this movie were. You weren’t sure how long you went on for, but after a while you realized you were going on a tangent, cutting yourself off as you looked at Eddie for the inevitable judgment to come. You’d grown used to your friends rolling their eyes or your mom telling you to stop talking about disgusting horror movies, but Eddie looked so… attentive? So interested to listen to what you were saying?

You looked back at the screen almost sheepishly, but you could still feel the burn of Eddie’s eyes watching you.

“You’re kind of a nerd.” He said with far too much glee, causing you to whip your mean gaze back to him; Eddie was smiling from ear-to-ear, clearly pleased with himself and his discovery of your hidden interest.

“I am not.” You scoff, trying not to grin back at him. Eddie leaned across the couch as if to emphasize his taunting, his eyes challenging as he stared at you.

“You just spent five minutes talking about how much you love to watch a fake head blow up - seems kinda nerdy.”

It felt as if no rift had ever formed between you two, as if you hadn’t just been awkwardly trying to apologize to him some fifteen minutes ago. Eddie just made it ridiculously easy to relax, to forget all the bullshit from the past few days.

You gave Eddie’s shoulder a playful shove, so he sat back up in his seat, that wicked grin still on his face, “What, don’t want to be lumped in with the rest of us?”

Despite trying to give Eddie a threatening look, you knew your eyes were betraying you - all of the menace in your expression was destroyed by the way your eyes blatantly shone with amusement. You had to look away again, otherwise you feared you might laugh.

“Liking horror doesn’t make me a nerd.” You insisted.

“No, but considering you made a whole speech about how impactful Cronenberg’s use of gore is, I wouldn’t call you a casual fan.” Eddie teased, and even without looking you knew just how big his grin was.

So, you kept your eyes trained on the screen, hoping to become absorbed in the movie as you tried to ignore the way Eddie was studying you. And it worked for at least a few minutes - you began to smile at the familiar film, attentively following the story development, all the while slowly forgetting about the eyes practically burning a hole in your skull.

But in his typical fashion, Eddie couldn’t stay quiet for too long.

“Jason Voorhees or Michael Myers?”

Without missing a beat, you looked back at Eddie, unable to hold your tongue on the debate. Your tone was perhaps a little snobby as you answered, “Michael, obviously.”

Again, Eddie grinned largely with a challenge in his eye, “‘Obviously?’”

Of course, you knew what he was doing - he was clearly trying to poke at you, but damn it, it was working. You couldn’t resist the opportunity to talk about movie slashers to a captive audience, even if said audience was likely going to keep egging you on.

You rolled your eyes, folding your legs up on the couch as you turned your body towards Eddie, “Jason isn’t scary.”

“Not scary? He and Michael are basically the same guy.” You pulled a face at the comment, noticing that Eddie seemed pleased with himself for getting you going on the subject.

“And I guess you think they’re also just like Bubba?” Eddie grinned wickedly, so you quickly reached over to smack his shoulder, “Don’t you dare say it.”

“Say what?”

You narrowed your eyes, torn between wanting to laugh and wanting to debate your point. You took a deep breath before looking back towards the movie, “Michael is better, end of conversation.”

“I’m more of a Freddy guy myself.” Eddie taunts, clearly not done tormenting you. You shot him a look from the corner of your eye, but didn’t dare give him the satisfaction of a response, trying to keep your attention on the movie instead. A minute later, Eddie chimed up again, “The Exorcist or the Omen?”

To that, you didn’t have as quick an answer, mulling it over for a moment before replying - when you answered with the Exorcist, Eddie couldn’t help but say that response was predictable.

So, it led you down the rabbit hole, Videodrome being totally forgotten in favor of debating your horror opinions. For every answer to Eddie’s questions, he had a counterargument - it didn’t matter whether or not you two agreed on something, he clearly just wanted to get you riled up. Maybe he enjoyed seeing you get excited about something, maybe he enjoyed the way you’d argue your case on characters you loved and hated.

When the pizza arrived, you raced Eddie to the door, paying for the food despite his protests, the pair of you clearly annoying the delivery driver who didn’t give a shit where the money came from so long as he got it. All through your meal, you two continued talking over the movie, which eventually reached its end and prompted Eddie to start playing another that you also wouldn’t pay any attention to.

As the night wore on, your debates eventually died down; your seat on the couch became increasingly more comfortable, and the shitty horror movie you had on was beginning to lull you to sleep. Considering how long your day - no, your whole week - had been, you were surprised it took this long for your exhaustion to set in. So, you slowly settled into the couch, progressively slumping into the cushions.

Seeing the tired look on your face, Eddie nudged you and insisted you lie down, and you were tired enough not to argue, resting on your side so you can continue watching the movie. You keep your legs curled up to avoid getting in Eddie’s space, but nonetheless your knees rest comfortable against his thigh. At some point between half awake and half asleep, you thought that maybe you felt his hand resting comfortably on your leg, but you were too tired to say for sure.

As the night wore on, you must have inevitably fallen asleep, because next thing you knew, you were being pulled out of a dream, a hand gently shaking your shoulder and Eddie’s far off voice encouraging you to wake up. You figured at first that the voice was just a part of your dream, but as the tone grew more clear and insistent, you were brought back to reality. Groggily, you blinked your eyes open with a confused glare - how long had you been out for? And what time was it?

Catching your eyes with his, the corner of Eddie’s mouth pulled back in a small grin, “Jesus, you sleep like the dead.”

A tired moan rumbled in your throat as your eyes narrowed. You tried to roll onto your other side as if you could somehow avoid Eddie that way, your words nonthreatening and heavy with sleep, “Fuck off…”

As Eddie sighed with annoyance, an unfamiliar huff of a laugh met your ears, but you weren’t nearly awake enough to even wonder who it belonged to. Eddie pulled at your shoulder so you couldn’t turn away from him, to which you whined again.

“No, you’re not sleeping on the couch, it’ll ruin your back.” Eddie insisted, teasingly pulling at your arm - if you weren’t still half asleep, it wouldn’t have annoyed you nearly as much as it did, “Come on, get up.”

You opened your harsh eyes again, knowing Eddie wouldn’t allow himself to be ignored. As your eyes adjusted, his face slowly came into focus, his hair haloed by the light of the TV; kneeling beside you, he was clearly trying to hide the amusement he found in your sleepy attitude.

The two of you stared at one another for a long minute as the fog slowly lifted from your brain, making you more and more aware of your surroundings. Your gaze drifted away from Eddie, noticing movement in the corner of your eye; turning in the direction of it, you made eye contact with a man who had to have been Eddie’s uncle. He quickly turned away, pretending to be preoccupied with something in the kitchen, as if that would give you and Eddie a measly sense of privacy.

With a deep yawn, you looked at Eddie again, begrudgingly accepting that you had to get up. You slowly rose into a seated position, your feet brushing Eddie’s leg as you moved to set them on the ground; he rose and took a step back to give you a little more space. Stretching your arms above your head and popping your neck, you looked between the two men, noticing that Eddie seemed to be somewhat sheepish, which made you curious. Was he embarrassed that this was how you and his uncle were meeting? Was it because he felt like you two were caught doing something wrong? Or was it something else entirely that influenced that expression on his face?

You sighed heavily as you rose to your feet, your face scrunching up a little as you looked around the room; your voice was still heavy with sleep as you asked, “What time is it? I have to go home.”

Eddie shook his head at the same moment that his uncle silently disappeared to the bathroom, the sound of the shower running drifting out from under the door; maybe he was trying to give you two a bit more privacy.

“You don’t have to go.” Eddie says in a surprisingly gentle tone, to which you furrow your brow, “It’s late and you're exhausted - just stay here tonight.”

You weakly tried to protest, although you were so tired that it was a relief to hear that Eddie wasn’t kicking you out in the wee hours of the morning, “I really shouldn’t.”

“You really should.” Eddie insisted, clearly not open to argument. Luckily for him, you accepted the response instantly, your head still too foggy to find a good enough reason to leave. So, you nod smally while trying to stifle another yawn.

Eddie points his hand in the direction of the bedroom, and you immediately accept the invitation, confidently heading that way as if you owned the damn place. You didn’t catch the tug of a smile that graced Eddie’s lips as he followed just a step behind you.

You entered the dark bedroom and all but collapsed onto the bed, hearing a slight laugh leave Eddie’s lips; at least he found it funny instead of rude, not that you were terribly concerned with that right now. No, the only thing on your mind at the moment was curling into the mattress and sleeping undisturbed for the rest of the night. You comfortably wrapped your arms around one of Eddie’s pillows, inhaling his lingering scent without considering what you were doing.

“You gonna sleep in that?” Eddie teased, reminding you that you were still in the workout clothes that you wore for skating. Like a stubborn child unwilling to do a task, you grunted, sitting back up and trying to find Eddie in the dark. You caught his silhouette digging through what you assumed to be a pile of clothes, eventually pulling something out and tossing it in your direction. The t-shirt weakly hit you in the chest before falling into your lap, so you started to pull off your own soiled shirt, letting it fall forgotten somewhere on the floor.

Light still filtered into the room through the gap in the door, so you caught the way Eddie spun around to give you privacy just as you started to tug at your bra; you couldn’t help but smile, finding it funny as he pushed the door closed. After all, it was dark enough that he probably couldn’t see anything; and even if he could, it didn’t matter. Right?

Eddie kept himself preoccupied, returning his attention to the stack of clothes as you pulled his scratchy t-shirt over your head; thanks to the darkness of the room, you didn’t catch the way he glanced back at you curiously. Once you were comfortable, you lied back down and began to burrow in the blankets, pulling them over your head as you listened to Eddie strip out of his own clothes.

A few moments later, one of the blankets was being yanked from the bed; you greedily tried to grab it before it was gone, but to no avail, which prompted you to poke your head out from the cocoon you’d built. You couldn’t quite find Eddie in the dark, but you nonetheless furrowed your brow in the direction you figured he was in.

“What are you doing?” You questioned groggily as your eyes began to adjust; you could now make out Eddie’s shadow as he appeared to turn to you.

“Sleeping on the floor.” He answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, nudging things aside with his foot before dropping the blanket to the ground. As he leaned over the bed to grab a pillow, you rolled your eyes and reached out to nudge him, making contact with bare skin before shuffling over to make room on the small bed.

“Like hell you are.” You attempted to snuggle into your new position, but seeing Eddie awkwardly lingering prompted you to reach over and give his arm a quick tug, “Get the fuck in the bed, Munson.”

Eddie hesitated a moment longer, and although he couldn’t see it, you stared at him in amused scrutiny. With a huff, you threw aside the blankets and hit the mattress once for emphasis, “Don’t tell me you’re nervous to share a bed with a girl.”

You readjusted to face away from Eddie, wrapping your arms around your pillow again and burying your face in it, getting cozy almost instantly. Behind you, he sighed before his weight shifted the mattress; just from the feel of his movements, you knew Eddie was awkwardly trying to stay as close to the edge of the bed as possible. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes with a smile at how stiff he was - at this rate, he wasn’t going to get a wink of sleep.

“Stop worrying about it, Eddie.” You muttered gently, curling up in the blankets as if you were a cat lying in the sun. A big yawn escaped you as you felt Eddie shift a little, and you knew you’d be out like a light any minute now, “Try to get some sleep, okay?”Eddie hummed in acknowledgement, and despite his best efforts to keep his distance, you could still feel his body heat radiating near you. Smiling comfortably to yourself, you quickly began to doze off, barely catching Eddie’s whispered “Night, princess…” before you fell back into a deep sleep.

additional a/n: I couldn't keep these two apart for even an entire chapter, so I hope their lil reconciliation was worth the wait!

taglist: @3rd-conchord @a-queen-blr @avalon-wolf @costellation-hunter @daisy-munson

@daisyridleyss @damon-loves-pie @damp4eddie @delilaaahhh @em0220

@frogtape @fromasgardandback @fckyeahlames @graciehams @kthomps914

@lotrefcp @love-anonymous-writer @marrowfrog00 @maskofmirrors @mewchiili

@miaajaade @mmmunson @munsonssweets @no-bueno-writer @rach5ive

@rcailleachcola @sav12321 @sheneedsrocknroll92 @steeldaisies @stormgrl19

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x you #stranger things #em #dos and donts

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chanif-art · 3 days

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It’s time to..

Happy Birthday to the GREATEST CHANIF✨

(I love everyone equally 🧎🏻‍♀️)

Thank you for being here with me. It is such a long way to continue, yet, you guys are still here. I am truthfully thankful for your support and tons of love that I have received :-)

I started this blog in 2021 because… I saw there was a few yandere art to consume— so, I drew. Initially, I drew for the reason that I wanted to make myself happy (with self-insert, yes🥺). But surprisingly, everyone seemed to enjoy it too..? At that time, I was so happy to know that everyone loved my art. Before I started this blog, I actually gave up drawing once. Maybe it was because of burnout or my low self-esteem. Anyway, I actually wanted to thank me in 2021 for decide to ‘just give it a go, draw for your satisfaction. No one hurts.’ something like that.

And the result went too beyond my expectations. My blog has growth. I got to know there are a lots of people who support me thoroughly during my hardest time. I am so grateful for the community I am part of. Even though I had gone for quite some time, there are still people who waiting for me to comeback— as always. And that… I do not know what to say— I know that I receive so much love. My english cannot elaborate how thankful I am. So all I can say is I appreciate you guys so much! Thank you as always :-)

Despite of the unstable of quality art, you guys still enjoy them. I am grateful for that. Despite of the lack of posting an art, you guys still waiting for me to post. I am grateful for that.

And if I cannot draw the bias that you love (yes, I noticed that I start to draw less Leon and recently start to draw Satoru more often— not to mention others that I barely draw) I am so sorry. I promise that I will draw others if you guys request it.

Now… now.. I would like to thank you:

@alexex8sts for being the biggest supporter!! You have supported me continuously that it becomes invaluable 🩵 it means a ton to me knowing that there is still a person who’s always be here with me. Alexie, thank you as always! Your ideas have inspired me a lot. I, Chanif, thank you for being friend with me🥰

@yune1337 thank you, Wolfie. For supporting me :-) Feel free to chat with me sometimes! I am always available!

@maleyanderecafe and how could I forget the person who makes me so popular?? LOL im kidding, please forget the part where i am popular 😂 Anyway— thank you for reblog and liking my art! I am always thankful for your support🙇🏻‍♀️

Thank you 🥀 anon for being part of Chanif’s family!! Always feel free to come and chat with me anytime you want!! I am here for you :-)

And shoutout to those I have not mentioned! Tons of thank for loving me and my art🩵 if it wasn’t for you guys, I wouldn’t know that the Cucumber007 would receive this much love and appreciation!! Not to mention that the people who followed me(at the time I wrote this) is now 2,222 individuals???? I gasped! Thank you as always!

Happy birthday to me, Chanif :-) you are 21 now and surround by people who adore you

Ganknow

#chanif art #thanks guys #hbd to me

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prettyboysdontlookatexplosions · 23 hours

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having finished david j. skal's something in the blood: the untold story of bram stoker, the man who wrote dracula, i enjoyed it tremendously and learned a lot and thought his commentary was mostly good or at least interesting and bookmarked some quotes i intend to type up at some point. BUT i do have some dracula-specific nits to pick that i am going to share here because to be frank i think The Dracula Daily Community On Tumblr will be receptive to my complaints. spoilers relative to the current calendar point below the cut for dracula daily first-timers

1. i mentioned early on in my reading of the book that one thing that became very apparent to me is that a lot of the seward-van helsing dynamic sure feels like it can be read as an expression of the kind of relationship stoker desperately wanted to have (or wanted to believe he had, and perhaps even convinced himself he did have) with henry irving: a mentor-mentee relationship between two men where the older and more dazzling man has his peculiarities and eccentricities but also pledges to the younger and more worshipful man a sincere undying loyalty born out of gratitude for his stalwart service in times of old and of a general respect for what the younger man brings to the table. skal is careful not to argue too forcefully for any particular biographical reading but he is also not generally shy about tossing out possible emotional connections or sources of inspiration; for example, as he discusses irving's death, he asks whether, if irving really was a source of inspiration for dracula, on some level stoker's observations of irving's failing health in his final years may have spurred him to gift him a fictionalized immortality. given that, the more i read the more i found it just sincerely bizarre that the sewart-van helsing connection doesn't come up even once. my guess is that his reading of jonathan as stoker's self-insert (he doesn't use that exact phrase iirc but he says this pretty much explicitly but i have no idea where in the 580 book so... sorry) occludes the possibility in his view that any of the other characters are also self-inserts (my own hypothesis is that basically every major character in dracula is a self-insert to some degree or another lmao. it's a very self-indulgent book! i don't mean that in a bad way!)

2. skal talks a lot about stoker's lifelong Gender Weirdness, which resists a reading as simple or as definitive as "he's just gay" but comes up repeatedly (sometimes in ways i thought were kind of goofy, like in his discussion of the irish custom of dressing boys in girls' clothing until they were like 7... like if it's culturally normal then doesn't that just mean children's clothing is gender neutral until a certain age? if it's happening to all boys would it be expected to have particular effects on a single boy who is being treated the same as all other boys? idk....). like, he talks about a poem stoker wrote in college or thereabouts that is either gay or from the perspective of a heartbroken woman, he talks about his interest in the conspiracy theory that queen elizabeth was actually a dude, etc. it's a recurring thread in the novel. AND YET!!!!!! ...... absolutely no mention of mina being described by van helsing as having a man's brain and a woman's heart. he quotes the journal entry where stoker describes himself in similar terms but does not connect it to dracula even though it is IMO a MUCH more explicit and direct connection than many of the possible biographical connections he identifies. like idk if i'm just tumblr dracula book club pilled but to me this was insane lol. that's the most overt expression of androgyny in dracula and it just doesn't come up at all! this is related i think to the idea that jonathan is the only self-insert (see also the fact that he never brings up how integral mina's secretarial skills are to the plot when he spent much of his professional life exercising secretarial skills of his own...) and also to his general acceptance of the reading that dracula as a novel is only nervous about women (which it is lol) and not doing any other stuff with them (which it also is! see below...)

3. okay this is the wildest one for me. on the one hand sometimes i get very insecure and defensive about how we talk about dracula here because i'm like, idk can 7 billion people positing a single very simplistic exclusively regressive view of the novel's treatment of women really all be wrong? but something happened in this book that kind of strengthened my conviction that no actually the book is just not as straightforward in its treatment of women as many readers would suggest, which is that skal, who has devoted a considerable portion of his career to the novel dracula by bram stoker, actively misremembers a scene in the book in a way that aligns it more comfortably with the reading that dracula is a fantasia about punishing gender-transgressive women - discussing stoker's next novel, the man, he writes: "There is much consideration of how female dominance and male submissiveness might be balanced, without the New Woman hysterics of Dracula, in which Lucy shocks propriety by suggesting a woman might propose to a man and is summarily cursed with living death." but lucy literally doesn't suggest that! mina does! (august 10: "But I suppose the New Woman won’t condescend in future to accept; she will do the proposing herself. And a nice job she will make of it, too! There’s some consolation in that.") and while mina is temporarily cursed with living death, ultimately she is saved and gets to live happily ever after. i was like quite sincerely shocked by such a flagrant error about the text this guy is an alleged expert on (he is one of the co-editors of the norton critical edition); personally i noticed the mistake right away because every year on Mina Makes Fun Of The New Woman Day i get annoyed at the tag filling up with people who have never in their lives heard of a smart interesting woman who was not also aligned politically with the cutting edge of feminist thought, lol. i guess it really goes to show you the power of narrative that a particular framework for understanding gender in the novel like... literally overwrote the actual text in the memory of someone who has spent much of his professional life talking about this novel. but like i said i also found this in a weird way affirming because well like yeah... in order to simplify gender in dracula that much you literally have to be wrong about the actual events of the book lol...

it's occurring to me now that he also talks about bram's invalid childhood but doesn't connect that to jonathan's time as an invalid and subsequent restoration to splendid manhood... i'm not saying there is a connection but i am saying i don't think this is a less insane thing to posit than "is dracula immortal because he wanted henry irving to live forever," you know?... he quotes a guy talking about all the grown men crying in the novel as an example of arrested development connected to reading dracula as a fairy tale which overall is a reading i DO like but he doesn't also connect all the hysterical dudes to the gender stuff even though the novel definitely makes a point to associate sobbing breakdowns with women while also giving them to all its male characters... well whatever... the history was very fun to read and i do recommend the book if you've been curious about What Stoker's Whole Deal Was and i also did like some of his insights on dracula, like the aforementioned connection to stoker's love for fairytales (he points out that as in fairytales most of the main characters are orphans and i was like - oh! - my heart!) and his emphasis on stoker's love for the theater and for his childhood experiences of the christmas pantomime which i think really underscores my general belief that dracula slaps partly because it is, as i mentioned above, extremely self-indulgent and totally unafraid of showy tricks and melodrama (compliment!!!! i mean this as a compliment!!!!)... but yes i do think his analysis of the novel leaves something to be desired.

#dracula daily #media 2k24

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syn4k · 2 days

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ok chat im crowdsourcing this one. what should i name my sword in minecraft

remember, the minecraft death message when someone's been directly killed by someone else is "[player] was slain by [player] using [weapon name]"!

*This is the actual text that the sword will be named as, minus the asterisk(s).

**See footnote 1. Also, yes, I added this as an option just so that if it wins, I can kill people and then declare them guilty of getting murdered with words. Hermitgang x16

***See footnote 1. This whole phrase almost certainly will not fit inside of an anvil, but I'll type as much of it in as I can before it inevitably tragically gets cut off.

****Any and all penis jokes will be instantly disqualified. I don't have one, I don't want one, and while I am incredibly aware of the parallels between combat and sex, I prefer to keep that shit in the sheets (of a book). Sorry, Tantalus. Try reaching for some higher hanging fruit <3 (please pretend that this also applies to option 8 i realized i already wrote that question after i posted the poll orz)

#apollo's tag #minecraft

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ao3commentoftheday · 3 days

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Hello. I was wondering if you could offer some advice for me even though it's a common topic :) I used to write all the time and had a huge flow of ideas that kept overlapping each other which made me super creative both in writing and in drawing. But for the past few years (vaguely stopped at the beginning of 2020) I've had no desire to write at all. A cynical part of me has convinced me that it won’t matter to even begin as I don’t finish and barely write the stories and so I don't achieve the satisfaction of deeper immersion into my stories. I know I’m not a bad writer but that my writing suffers when I have no passion.

Previously I would brainstorm/rant with my friend (vice-versa) who was also a writer but we've drifted apart since (and my other friend has no mental energy for writing anymore because of life). I find it very difficult to keep and maintain any growing passion when I'm alone and unable to share with like-minded people - my passion/motivation seems to die when I can't share it. So how do I regain and maintain it? (Obvious answer is to find someone to share ideas with but... how...? And how do I learn to motivate myself when I'm alone?)

It might be a common topic, but each individual situation is still unique. You're going through a lot, anon, and I'm glad you reached out to get some support 💗

Let's start by looking at the factors you've identified that make it difficult for you to write:

Possible burnout - 2020 makes me think of Covid, stress, uncertainty, constant change, perhaps other factors that are more specific to you as an individual. All of these things are exhausting both mentally and physically and can lead to burnout

Limited support from your community - 2 friends are less involved in your writing than they used to be

Limited empathy for yourself - your frustration is turning into self-blame where you're focusing on the fact that your stories aren't finished rather than on the fact that you lack passion for them

I'm drawing some pretty big conclusions here based on two paragraphs of text, so please do push back against anything that feels like an unfair reading of what you wrote. But it seems to me that you've been through an emotional wringer over the last few years between 2020 and your friendship drifting and not having the same supports in place that you used to have.

I think the thing you need to focus on right now is giving yourself the love and kindness you're not currently getting from others. You're beating yourself up for not finishing a story, but you say that your passion comes from immersion in it. Immersion doesn't require an ending. It just needs you to find a way to get deeper into the characters and/or the plot and/or the world.

You used to be able to find that immersion by talking about your stories with your friends. I agree that you should seek out people again since that's clearly really important to you, but while you do that you should also try to identify ways that you can immerse yourself without someone to talk to.

Try stepping away from the idea of writing the story down and instead allow yourself to just daydream about it. Think about the story. Imagine what might happen next. Play with scenes and explore the possibilities instead of deciding for sure what will happen next. When the story isn't written yet, you have an infinite choice of ways that it could go. Perhaps leaning into those myriad options will help you find the fun in it again.

As for finding a new community of people you can talk to about your writing? That's going to take some time and some work. Finding a discord server of like-minded folks. Commenting on the works of writers you find interesting. Replying to comments on your own stories. Posting ask games on tumblr and sending asks when other people post them too. Making friends online isn't always easy or fast, but those are some possible ways to go about it.

But also consider seeing if your local library has a writer's group. Join a local hobby group unrelated to writing where you can find people you enjoy. Your community doesn't have to revolve around fandom. It can also just be people who like you and who you like in return and you all feel comfortable sharing what you love.

Since you sent this ask in, I reblogged a post about rehab for writing injuries. I think you might want to take a look at that too. I think you might find it helpful. ❤️

#asks and answers #long post

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raina-at · 1 day

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Self-rec Thingy

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. spread the self-love ❤

Thank you for the tag, @calaisreno and @weeesi

This is surprisingly difficult. I shamelessly admit that I like all of my fics, otherwise I wouldn't have posted them ;-)

So. Favourite five.

I'll start with Spare Parts, my Sci-Fi AU. I loved writing this fic, and I love the worldbuilding, I love the hostility of the environment and the resilience John and Sherlock show to not only survive, but thrive in a hostile world. It's set in the 24th century on Titan, but of all my AUs, it's actually the most canon compliant, ironically. It's also me going into the meat and bones of what Reichenbach meant for Sherlock and John, and my thoughts on why Sherlock did what he did. (it's also probably my most underappreciated fic in terms of effort versus response, but I love it, and that's all that matters ;-))

Next up is Nothing Gold Can Stay, a fix-it for S3. I carried this idea with me for months, and the fic came out in little bursts of hundred-word-snippets (in stark contrast to the sequels, which flowed out of my pen in a matter of days), but I'm really happy with the end result. I also always wanted to write a series of short fics that hang together, and this was the starting point for the series that I will continue, promise, as soon as life isn't quite as crazy. My plan is to continue the series as a sort of parallel to S3, but let's see what life does to me over the next few months.

Since this is about fics I like best and not necessarily underappreciated stories, it would be remiss of me not to honour the bakers here. Bakers with Benefits is by far my most popular story, and I like it a lot. It was great fun to write (I grin like a loon when I re-read the cake war chapter), and I love revisiting them in ficlets (which should be obvious, given how often I do it ;-)) They're so much fun, and they're so comforting. I love writing established relationship with them, because you can just throw whatever at them and you absolutely know they'll get through it together.

It almost feels unfair to my lesser-loved stories to pick my fic with the most kudos here, but, well, I really like it. Don't Read the Last Page is probably the most realistic life with a child fic I've written (and parts of it are directly ripped from real life), and it has one of my top three favourite conversations between Sherlock and John I've ever written in there (and also probably my second favourite first kiss).

So the last one is really hard, because like I said, I like all of my fics. But just for the sheer joy of writing it (I can't describe how eager I felt to "spend time" with this fic when I wrote it), and for the love of theatre and Jane Austen that's always in my heart, I'm picking my theatre/Persuasion AU Take Two. There's fics you struggle with, fics you labour on, and fics that take over your body and just pour out with sheer joy and creative flow, and this fic was definitely the latter. It also has PINING!, and I love me some good PINING!

Tagging @helloliriels @jrow @meetinginsamarra @lisbeth-kk and @blogstandbygo , but if you see this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged!

#johnlock #bbc sherlock #five favourite fics #bakers with benefits #spare parts #don't read the last page #take two #nothing gold

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liaslullaby · 16 hours

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What alcohol does | Bokuto Koutaro

You and Bokuto have known each other for a few years, your chemistry is very clear and everyone knows that there is something between you two, maybe not as much as he would like until he gets drunk at a party and decides that he has waited a long time.

Contents: afab!reader, fingering, oral, praise, face fucking, drunk sex, semi public, hand job, clothed sex, consensual.

Word count: 6.8K

+18 MDNI—Explicit content

A/N: This oneshot is the first one I wrote as part of a Haikyuu oneshot book that you can find on wattpad. I decided to put my oneshots here because I honestly don't trust wattpad not to delete my book again so better safe than sorry.

When you arrived at the meeting place you started looking for Akaashi, the both of you agreed to meet there so you can go to the party Bokuto invited you together. Although you didn't really want to go since there wouldn't be many people you knew, the young man with black and white hair always knew how to convince you, or rather you had never been able to say no.

The former Fukurodani star was a weakness for you ever since you two first interacted, at the camp Karasuno's team had been invited to in your second year of high school, as one of the team's managers you attended with them meeting him there. Fukurodani's captain, Bokuto Koutaro.

Since you started university in Tokyo and you were forced to move, daily messages with him became constant outings or visits, he was excited to show you various places he enjoyed going or simply go to your apartment to do a movie marathon, so over time he became one of the most important people in your life and although you did not have a formal relationship or anything like that, it was easy for the rest of the world to notice your chemistry so there was no doubt for anyone that you both had strong feelings for each other.

Your eyes met Akaashi's black hair that seemed to be trying to find you just like you had been doing, you went to him immediately and when you arrived you gave him a smile as a greeting to which he responded by also smiling calmly. He told Bokuto that you were both on the way, and then you quietly made your way to the party place.

You knew that all the guests would meet at the house of one of the former members of the Fukurodani, someone from Bokuto's generation, although you did not know exactly who he was or where the exact place was, luckily Akaashi lived near you and had agreed to guide you. After all it wasn't a problem for him, you always got along, you may not have talked much to each other but since you were the two most important people for the yellow-eyed man it was impossible that you didn't end up relating to each other after all. Both always support each other on what he respects, it helps a lot to have someone who also knows how to deal with Bokuto.

"Bokuto-san said you weren't sure about coming, I hope he didn't force you" Akaashi mentioned breaking the silence. You laughed at the assumption, sometimes you were amazed at how much he could get to know Bokuto, it seemed like he really knew him like the back of his hand, even better than you thought you knew him.

"He didn't force me Akaashi, don't need to worry" you assured. And it is that if something was clear to you, it is that he would not be able to force you into anything, he did not have the slightest intention of doing anything that could hurt you. He knew how to convince you when you had doubts but when he heard a resounding no he would never have a single objection, Bokuto knew very well the fine line of when it was okay to insist and when not.

As you moved through the crowded streets of Tokyo, the idea of not knowing exactly how much was left to your destination made you more desperate, not that you needed to get to the party, you only had several days without being able to see the man with black and white hair because of how busy you were. You had your exams these last few weeks, so the idea of being in front of him again had you a bit anxious, although you wouldn't admit it in front of Akaashi so you just followed him without asking how far you had to go.

After walking for a while sunk in your thoughts, Akaashi's voice calling you from behind stopped your steps, you turned to see him just a few meters from you, you hadn't even realized when he had stopped. He pointed to the house in front of him and you knew then that you had finally arrived. Konoha received you, greeting you very animatedly to have only exchanged few words with you, but the smell of alcohol on his breath explained everything.

The music boomed your ears as soon as you two stepped inside the house, Akaashi and you were immediately overwhelmed by the atmosphere, the sound reverberating throughout the place forcing you to scream every time you wanted to speak, LED lights of various random colors it was the only thing that lit up the place so if you weren't careful it was easy to trip over something or someone, ecstatic people moving all over the place without caring about anything in particular and the unmistakable smell of alcohol that filled the nostrils of anyone who decided to enter that house.

As expected you didn't know at least more than half of the party and that quickly made you feel out of place especially since besides Akaashi, you seemed to be the only sober person in the whole place.

You both managed to push your way through the crowd, but within seconds you lost Konoha, leaving you with no idea where to find the bathroom, something to drink, or more importantly, Bokuto.

You felt a hand land heavily on your shoulder, as if the person who touched you had just carelessly dropped it on you. By instinct you turned to find a pair of eyes that you knew quite well, his height accompanied by the fact that he seemed to lean over you made feel you small for an instant. Your name accompanied by the honorific -chan came rushing out of his mouth, probably because of the amount of alcohol he would have ingested.

"Looks like you're enjoying the party, Kuroo-san" you responded by raising your voice as much as you could above the music trying to make him hear you. A lazy smile crossed his face confirming your guess.

"Not as much as your boyfriend" before you could object and correct him, he took you by the shoulders trying to take you with him, which due to his height and strength that exceeded yours, was not very difficult for him. Akaashi was alarmed as soon as he saw Kuroo dragging you down with him, he tried to follow you as best he could but the drunk people who appeared on his way to greet him made it very difficult for him.

Moving everyone out of the way thanks to his enormous size, the black-haired man managed to lead you to the kitchen where you could see a large number of empty bottles on the counter, a group of boys had a shot competition, everyone looked euphoric, animated and above all totally absorbed in their game. Recognizing Bokuto quickly was like taking candy from a baby for you, there was no way you wouldn't find him in seconds with his presence captivating you so much. Everyone in the group grabbed one of the small containers in front of them, what you quickly recognized as Jelly shots, at the count of three each one drank the content of their glass as fast as they could.

"Oi Bokuto, look what I found" You didn't understand how the black-haired man managed to get his words to Bokuto's ears over the music but that's how it was, his yellow eyes found yours and then he almost choke with what he had ingested before. One of his friends noticed it and immediately patted him hard on the back as if he were hitting a volleyball ball. Automatically Bokuto spat out what was in his mouth causing the reddish contents from earlier to land perfectly on Kuroo's shoes.

Completely ignoring the insults and curses of the black-haired man, he walked towards you to take your waist in his arms and hold on to it while burying his head in your neck, thus allowing you to feel all the smell of alcohol that emanated. Not that you really care because having him close was everything you wanted.

Bokuto felt his body extremely light, any worries he might have had been erased thanks to his companions who hadn't stopped making him drunk since he arrived, initially he wanted to be sober by the time you arrived but Kuroo made sure that wasn't possible. He closed his eyes enjoying the sweet smell of your neck, he had always loved your perfume even though he didn't know what kind of fragrance it was, he found it addictive. Without much thought he smiled against your clavicle, suddenly his euphoria from before had been replaced by a sense of comfort at having you in his arms.

"I am happy to see you too" you whispered when you saw him and he tightened his grip even more without saying anything, as if he didn't want to let you go. He separated from your neck to look at you with great difficulty thanks to the fact that the lights were very dim in the kitchen, with his blurry vision he managed to analyze your face and without warning he stamped his lips against yours, taking you and everyone present by surprise.

You guys had never been one to show any kind of physical affection in public beyond a hug or holding hands to guide the other while walking, so the show that Bokuto decided to put on at that moment made his friends and yourself static for a minute. It's not that you hadn't kissed before, it was just that you had never kissed in front of anyone, not even in front of Akaashi who the two of you spent the most time with. However, the recent arrival of the aforementioned black-haired man and the scream he gave calling Bokuto made him break the kiss to look at his best friend as if nothing had happened.

A while later you were sitting on the counter with the drink that Kuroo had prepared and you lowered it down your throat feeling how it burned a bit, a sensation that unlike the yellow-eyed one you were already used to. Bokuto had his hand on your right knee making little circles with his thumb as Konoha talked to him about trivial things that he couldn't quite get by looking your way. The way your lips moved humming the song that was playing in the background was driving him crazy, added to the desire he had to repeat the kiss from before and the heat that the alcohol had generated in his body, there was no way that he could think of nothing else.

The moment his friend excused himself to go to the bathroom, Bokuto took the opportunity to stand in front of you, without a clear idea of what he wanted beyond having you close again, with one of his hands he separated your legs spreading them wide enough so that his torso fit and he took your waist in his arms again. His mind was too sunk in the sensation of lack of inhibition that the drinks gave him to care about the rest of the people who were there, he was not even interested in the look of surprise that you gave him for his sudden action, he just wanted to put their lips together again with yours, was what his animal instinct asked him at that moment. For the second time that night he had taken you off guard, the difference is that now Akaashi wasn't there to interrupt and your common sense had also been lost towards a few drinks.

Bokuto felt how you put your hands on his chest returning the kiss with pleasure, thus causing him to take one of his hands to your neck taking it from behind to deepen it even more, he licked your lower lip asking for permission and as soon as your lips parted giving him access free to your mouth he tighten the grip of the arm that was still around your waist, he wanted to have you closer, as much as possible because the distance was starting to feel maddening, maybe it was the fact that you hadn't seen each other in several days or the alcohol that ran through his blood but the yellow eye had not the slightest intention of letting you go that night.

He let go of your neck only to take you with both hands from the hip and forcefully taking you to the edge of the counter so he could have his body as close to yours as he wanted. Your hands traveled from his chest to his neck and with his hands he made your legs encircle his waist, if the kiss before had been a spectacle for his friends now you two had surpassed it by far, no one dared to say anything but it's not that they would like to leave. The right hand of Bokuto hit your left thigh, pressing it hard, that managed to bring you back to your senses.

Placing one of your hands on his chest again, you pushed him away slightly before things progressed into dangerous territory, not that it bothered you that this could happen but you also didn't want it to happen with all of Bokuto's friends witnessing the event.

His eyes met yours as soon as you parted, his pupils dilated as far as they would go, all you could find there was desire and need. There was no trace of the sweet eyes that always accompanied the huge smile that naturally spread over Bokuto's face, this was a part of him you had never come across.

He scanned your face, confused by the separation, looking for signs that he had done something wrong but a pat on his back called his name before he could ask you what had happened. Kuroo took Bokuto's hand, further confusing the yellow-eyed, opened his palm put something on it that he couldn't see clearly, closed it into a fist and then whispered something in his ear that he could barely hear. You both watched the black-haired man leave after that, leaving you completely alone and taking a big gulp of what was probably the last bottle of rum left in the place.

You didn't even notice when the rest had disappeared, nothing else had really mattered to you two until that moment.

Bokuto stayed for a moment looking at the door through which his friend had left, you were alone with no one to interrupt it was almost the perfect moment for which he had been waiting, all he had to do was head towards the door and lock it so that no one would have a chance to interrupt what he was about to do to you, perhaps the world had finally sided with him.

He had imagined that moment a few times without getting much more relief than himself, before you moved in he even had tried to take it out on someone else but the way you had embedded yourself in his mind did not leave him alone, it was as if you had become the only person who could have an effect on him. And for that same reason he never seek to rush you, he didn't want to get to it unless you asked him directly, the problem is that time was becoming more eternal than he thought it would be. Without giving it much more thought he closed the door, left what Kuroo had given him to the side of the refrigerator and came back to you clasping his lips with yours desperately.

Your legs went back around his body, entwining behind his back and Bokuto's hands made their way to rest on your thighs, he had always loved them and now he had them only for him, he had you only for him. You bit his lower lip causing him to growl followed by your name, the way he said it made you think that it had never sounded so good, no one could ever say it better than him. His hands were moving up the dress you were wearing until he stopped suddenly and he separated just enough so that his lips were still touching yours.

"Can I?" He asked, lifting the fabric slightly with the tip of his index finger and without taking his eyes off your lips, with your agitated breaths intermingling you nodded without much thought, at that point the idea of his hands running through your entire body was far from bothering you.

With the consent received, his hands lifted the skirt of your dress enough so that he could appreciate your underwear and you were internally grateful for having used one of the few sexy clothes you had instead of something comfortable but not as visibly nice as you used to do. He started kissing your neck while his fingers played with the edge of your underwear and he enjoyed the slight sounds that escaped from your mouth, it was definitely music to his ears.

His brain couldn't believe how exquisite your body was to him and how beautiful you looked, he smiled against your neck before pressing his lips harder against it to suck a little, surely that would leave a mark and he was proud of it, he repeated the same thing at least two more times before separating to appreciate his masterpiece that you hadn't even noticed, his lips on your skin felt so good that you simply concentrated on enjoying the sensation. One of his hands pressed hard on your butt, the other was in charge of continuing to play with the edge of your underwear and that was beginning to make you a little desperate.

"Bo, if you're going to remove it do it right now, dammit" you demanded causing him a smile, for him your wishes were orders. As if it were an expert, he pulled with both hands easily getting rid of the garment, with the free path he caressed one of your thighs again before directing his hands towards your pussy.

"Are you this wet for me?" he asked stunned for a second, fixing his eyes on yours. Embarrassed by the question, you nodded looking away from him and covering your newly flushed cheeks with the back of your hand. Bokuto pushed it away and placed a small kiss on your lips before touching you again.

His fingers had no problem finding your clit, caressing it gently, he managed to get a small moan from you, which only caused the bulge that began to look like his pants to grow larger than before. He started making small circles increasing your gasping, his free hand traveled back to your butt squeezing it every time he heard a moan leave your lips. For someone who was completely lost in alcohol you were surprised at how skilled Bokuto was proving to be. He leave your clitoris only to slowly open your folds and position one of his fingers at your entrance.

"Should I be car..." he muttered but you silenced him by pressing your lips against his.

"This is not my first time, you don't have to worry" with that said, he plunged his finger into you without problems, making you jump a little at the contact, it might not be the first time you did it in your life but it was the first time in a long time and your body had forgotten what it was like to be invaded by that manner.

Bokuto wouldn't admit it but the thought of someone else touching you like he was doing bothered him a bit, although he knew you had the right to have a sex life just imagining someone else having you made him jealous because no one would value you like he did and he was ready to show you.

He began to move slowly inside of you, enjoying how good it felt and how you reacted to his touch, it was something worth admiring for him, an image that he wanted to have imprinted in his memory from now on. As his moves became stronger, the wet around his finger increased so he don't hesitate to add one more digit causing a shiver to run down your spine, you rested your head on his chest breathing heavily thanks to the pleasure he was giving to you and it didn't take you long to ask him to speed up, which he had no problem doing.

With the wave of pleasure you were receiving your moans only increased each time, so you tried to silence them by covering your mouth with your hands bothering Bokuto and making him withdraw his fingers and immediately you looked at him, you looked more needy than you would have wanted but you didn't care. He slam one of his hands into your ass so hard it would probably leave a mark and you whimpered at the action, with his other hand he lift your chin to kiss you again.

"Let me listen to you" the tone that he used, far from scaring you only make you wetter, you agreed to his demand and he directed his hand to your vagina again, continuing with his work. This time he fixed his eyes on yours, you could appreciate his dilated pupils again and the deep look he had of him was almost hypnotizing, you couldn't stop looking at him even if you wanted to.

He took his fingers out of your interior again and before you could even object, he kissed you gently pushing you until you were resting on your elbows and then went down to your neck and later to the neckline of your dress, under your watchful gaze he pressed one of your breasts on the fabric, his hand was big enough to make them look small despite having a good size, without taking his eyes off yours he knelt down, having in front of him an excellent view of your entrance.

He licked his lips and then brought his mouth closer to your clitoris, feeling his tongue begin to move up and down there was no way you could stop the moan that escaped your lips, the loudest so far. Bokuto smiled against your entrance and felt quite motivated to continue, to say that his tongue worked wonders would be an understatement considering that he had managed to have you filling the kitchen with moans. You could feel your entrance throbbing and you couldn't hold on any longer as his free hand went towards it, opening your folds for him, giving him the welcome he had been longing for.

He took a quick look at the beautiful view in front of him, he had every intention of saving that exquisite memory for when he needed it, when you abandoned it again because of your exams that is the night he would use to calm his desire to see you, he needed to collect as much as he could to keep each part of you in his memory because he wanted to remember it as he was living it.

Leaning fully on the counter, you arched your back slightly as you felt the first approach of Bo's tongue at your entrance, he began to insert himself and the mess he was turning you into could not have been anticipated even in his wildest dreams.

He waited a few seconds before pulling out his tongue to reintroduce it again and slowly repeated the process, he wanted to hear again that you asked him to increase the rhythm, the sound of your voice trembling and how your words cut off because a sudden increase in pleasure, that was what he wanted to hear, the results of his good work.

"B-Bo, fa-faster" you whined.

He sank deeper into you before complying with what you asked, his nose making light contact with your sensitive clit causing a shiver to run through you and your legs trembled around Bokuto's head so he grabbed them with both hands to keep them in place without losing his concentration, his gaze was fixed on you, your hands were pressing the edge of the counter as hard as you could when you began to feel something unknown start to form in the lower part of your stomach, you had no idea what it could be but it would surely be Bokuto's fault. Using your feet awkwardly you tried to push him away but all you got was that he tightened his grip on your legs and increased his pace pushing you to the limit.

It felt so good, too good and it scared you because your body had never behaved like this before, your legs trembled and tried to close but he wouldn't allow it, you were totally sensitive to the touch there was no action on his part that didn't send uncontrollable currents to every part of your body and finally there was that feeling you had in your stomach, you wanted to ask him to stop for a second but you couldn't form words, your mind was too cloudy for that. Bokuto released one of your legs and brought his thumb to your clit, that being the straw that broke the camel's back.

Suddenly you weren't able to take any more and you felt like your body was breaking free. Bokuto had achieved what he wanted, to give you an orgasm, although he had no idea that it was the first one you received because your previous encounters were with selfish people who never cared about your pleasure, so he was the first one who had the chance to turn you into a disaster, prey to pleasure and your body full of spasms from the new sensation you had experienced.

The yellow-eyed man had his face covered in your fluids and a big smile of satisfaction, he used his fingers to bring everything he could to his mouth because he didn't want to waste anything that came from you. He stood up and covered your entire body with his gaze, proudly observing what he had achieved, supporting his hands on both sides of your waist and then approaching to kiss your cheek, you smiled slightly at his action and tried to get up for what he decided to help you by passing one of his arms behind your back and holding your thigh with his other hand, sitting you a little more on the counter because he was afraid that you would fall if you stayed on the edge. He put his hand on your right cheek to scan your face, you looked relaxed and tired at the same time but totally pleased.

"I don't know what you did but that never happen to me" you whispered looking into his eyes and a look of surprise crossed his face when he heard your confession.

"You never had an orgasm before?" He asked incredulously, when he saw you deny, the jealousy that he had developed before disappeared to make way for his ego to grow and he caressed your cheek and then got closer to your ear "How was it?"

You weren't even sure you could explain it to him in words, so all you did was take his face in your hands and kiss him hoping you could convey all the gratitude you felt, you could even taste the remains of yourself in his mouth, it was strangely bitter and but not unpleasant at all. Your hands traveled up to Bokuto's abdomen caressing it a little on the fabric of his shirt and then down to the beginning of it and holding it in your hands.

"Can I?" You asked, copying what he had said before and separating yourself just enough so that his lips and yours brushed against each other mixing your breaths. Bokuto nodded smiling so you took off his shirt to later throw it to the ground and delight yourself with the worked body of the man infront of you. You bit your lower lip while your hand slowly moved down the length of the yellow-eyed man's torso, paying special attention to his ripped abs.

You leaned towards him to kiss his neck and clavicles while your hands went down a little more until you found the button of his pants. He sighed, pulling his head back and stopping you with one of his hands, holding the back of his neck with the other digging in his nails in an attempt to control himself.

"Are you sure you wanna do that?"

You didn't give him time to think when you released the button and he looked at you in amazement at how quickly you did it, a confident smile crossed your face when you winked at him and right after you started leaving wet kisses on his chest. You unzipped his pants and then you finally managed to reach Bokuto's boxer and the huge bulge that was in it, you brought your hands towards his dick without stopping concentrating on his chest but when you took it you stopped stunned by its size, you looked at his member and when you saw him you swallowed some saliva, he noticed it and brought his mouth closer to your ear.

"That's why I asked you if you were sure" his voice was slightly deeper than before and that caused a tingle between your legs. With his ego increased he decided to tease you a bit. "Do you think you can handle that or do you want to stop?"

His words struck straight at your pride, you might have been slightly drunk from the alcohol but you weren't stupid, you knew perfectly well that Bokuto knew you very well, his little suggestion that you wouldn't be able to take it was only because that's what it would normally push you to do anything, you didn't like being underestimated in any way and although you didn't want to let him believe that his plan had worked, the reality is that you didn't want to stop either.

Lowering his pants only what was necessary followed by his underwear, you fixed your eyes on his, ready to admire how you made him eat his words. He smiled at you when he felt your hand completely surround his dick, the touch felt much softer than he expected and he looked away for a minute just to appreciate how your small hand made him look even bigger, there was no way that he wouldn't want to keep a mental image of it in your head.

Your hand initially moved timidly, somewhat slow and uncertain, yet it didn't take long for you to gain confidence as he grasped your thighs again and brought his head back letting out a deep breath, feeling the relief for which his body had been begging him ever since his erection began to appear. Without needing to be asked, you increased speed keeping a good pace, which he internally appreciated but there was no signal for you, no sound to tell you that you were doing it right and since you were looking to make him a disaster like he had done with you so that he regretted his words, you decided to change the strategy a bit. You pushed him away from the counter to get down, Bokuto followed your movements confused until he saw you kneel in front of him.

"Make an effort to resist a little, will you?" upon hearing your words, he swallowed saliva but did not respond, he concentrated on following everything you did with his eyes, first you licked your lips and took him with your right hand and then brought your recently moistened lips closer, you gave a small kiss on its tip before to start giving light licks to the head of his member, you could hear his breathing heavier than before and that encourages you to continue.

You decided to slowly run your tongue along its entire length, taking care of covering it completely with your saliva and then you began to move your hand from front to back, as slowly as you could just to torture him. He growled under his breath but didn't bother to utter a word. You saw the pre-cum peek out, so you finally decided to give him what he wanted, wrapped your lips around his tip and gave yourself the chance to look up just to look at him, biting his lower lip so hard you'd swear he'd hurt himself if he kept on like this, clearly annoyed at how slow you were taking everything and because he was sure it was on purpose.

"If you are going to..." you didn't even allow him to finish speaking and you took his member as far into your mouth as possible, so the rest of his sentence ended with a moan on his part, the first one you managed to get out of him. You wouldn't admit it out loud but it sounded so exquisite that you felt your entrance get wet again. "Fuck"

Trying to cover as much as you could with your mouth, you began to take him a little deeper each time, covering the rest with your hand and completely enjoying listening to the curses that he gave under his breath, in addition to the occasional moans that he could not hold back, you hadn't made him a mess yet but it wouldn't take much longer either. You brought your free hand to your clitoris massaging it lightly while you increased the speed and sucked slightly narrowing your mouth with your cheeks for him.

Bokuto ran his hands through your hair pulling it back to slow you down but his brain was barely able to process the amount of alcohol he had ingested added to the pleasure he was receiving, plus the work of measuring the strength he needed to stopping you without being too abrupt was too much for him so he just exerted almost no resistance. However, the second time he forcefully grabbed your cheeks, completely moving away from his member and forced you to look at him.

"Sorry" said that, he went back to your mouth and without any warning, he entered so deep that you would swear that you felt it in your throat.

Little tears welled up in your eyes but he was too immersed in pleasure to notice them. Although it was hard for you to breathe, the sight you had at that moment of Bokuto was the most exciting thing you had seen in a long time, his thrusts were constant and firm, his hands held your cheeks tightly and the way his jaw clenched had you totally surrendered to his mercy.

He took a few more thrusts before totally moving away from you, however, assuming what was about to happen you quickly took it back to introduce it back into your mouth and feel how a sudden liquid escaped from his dick, it was thick but still you swallowed it all and then you looked at him sticking out your tongue to show him what you had done.

"You were great" he caressed your cheek smiling as he caught his breath "That's my girl"

You smiled satisfied and put your hands on the ground to get up, Bokuto seemed to walk towards the door for what you thought was opening it so you rushed to look for your underwear and his shirt that would have been thrown somewhere, you turned your back on him as soon as you bent down to take your panties and when you stood up you felt like a pair of arms surrounded your waist attaching his whole body to you, allowing you to feel a bulge in your lower back. He tucked your hair behind your ear and then brought his lips closer.

"We are not done"

A chill ran down your spine, it didn't even seem normal that he could be ready so quickly but you were already used to the fact that Bokuto always knew how to surprise you. He brought both hands to your breasts cradling them and his tongue began to lick your earlobe making your entrance soaking wet. He turned you until you were both face to face and your eyes fell on his member, even with the dim lighting you managed to realize that he was now wearing a condom.

"Where did you-"

"We should thank Kuroo later"

You laughed before meeting your lips with his again and you put your hands behind his neck, both began to fight for dominance until Bokuto made you jump up to surround his torso with your legs, he put his hands on your butt because he simply loved it, besides that this way he could hold you more firmly.

You felt the tip of his member at your entrance and you moaned on his lips as he began to slowly insert himself into you, it didn't hurt but his size was definitely something you had never experienced, you rolled his shoulders with your arms and your nails dug into his back . When he managed to get all the way in as he could, walked to a free wall and lean your back against it then he slowly pulled out of you, almost completely to re-enter slamming and merciless.

"Bokuto" you moaned his name so loud the entire party would probably hear you if the music wasn't blaring.

"Say that again" he whispered in your ear without stopping, increasing his thrusts to the point of making you wonder if you would be able to walk after that.

You moaned his last name again and he inadvertently reached your G-spot, lashing out at the same place over and over again, the feeling you had in the lower part of your stomach appeared a second time and your nails dug deeper into his back making him growl again, he was trying to concentrate to not reach his orgasm before you but each time you made it more difficult.

"Bo, I'm about to..."

"Me too"

You tightened around him and a couple more thrusts were enough for your second orgasm to take place, after which Bokuto couldn't resist much more by himself. He rested his head on your shoulder and gave a few more clumsy thrusts than the previous ones to later let out a moan in your ear indicating that he had also reached his limit.

He came out of you to later lower yourself slowly until your feet touched the ground, at the moment his hands let you go you felt your legs shake so you grabbed Bokuto's shoulders again, an arrogant smile formed on his face. He lean in and place a small kiss on your forehead before carry you bridal style.

"Well done baby" the soft words of the yellow-eyed were the last thing you heard before resting your head on his chest and closing your eyes.

The next day you woke up in a soft bed, nothing around you seemed familiar, you looked for Bokuto but there was no sign of him although you were wearing his shirt, which was quite wide and it covered up to a third of your thigh.

You decided to leave the room and walked down a corridor to some stairs, standing there at the top you recognized the place where you were, apparently you never left Konoha's house. You went downstairs looking for Bokuto and you heard some voices coming from the kitchen so you slowly walked there.

You peeked out sheepishly and could see Kuroo, Konoha, and two other former Fukurodani members laughing as a shirtless Bokuto held cleaning supplies. The black-haired man's gaze found you and a mocking smile crossed his face.

"Your girlfriend woke up" he said making everyone's eyes turn towards you, your hands instinctively went to the edge of the shirt to pull it down a little more, perhaps you hadn't thought very well about the idea of going down with only Bokuto's shirt on.

You opened your mouth to object about the way Kuroo had referred to you and almost as if Bo read your mind he turned to look at you with puppy eyes that melted your heart, maybe you were his girlfriend after all.

"Can you all stop looking at me? It's not like I have a clown in my face" you complained crossing your arms.

"Not a clown but you do have a lot of hickeys on your neck" Konoha mentioned mockingly as did Kuroo. You widened your eyes and instinctively covered your neck with your hands, then gave Bokuto an annoyed look.

"Oops"

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu bokuto #haikyuu #haikyuu smut #bokuto kōtarō #bokuto smut #bokuto x reader #smut oneshot #minors dni #mdni #18+ minors dni

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the-bitter-ocean · 3 days

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( ACT 3/ ACT 4 SPOILERS) This is part 1 of the many responses/ dialogue options I wrote for the conversation that Rewind and Mirabelle have on what Rewind’s identity truly is. To understand the full context you can find the original post here. Writing is under the cut:

{{“So I suppose you must have a lot of questions for me don’t you? Theories as to who I might be?”}}

{ You do. You can’t help but feel overwhelmed by all of this.}

{“Let’s make this like a game so you can get to know me a little better. How’s that sound hm?”}}

{You nod slowly, still unsure.}

{{“You get one guess for this so pick whatever feels right in your heart.”}}

{One guess?}

{If you were being completely truthful the idea of prying into someone else’s personal lives felt invasive?}

{You wouldn’t want anyone- let alone complete strangers knowing deep intimate details of your personal growth like that. }

{ The thought of people assuming things or thinking they know you better than you know yourself makes you squirm.}

{In Vaugarde, it’s very common for people to change. Names, hairstyles, beliefs, clothes and hobbies- all of that is subject to change if the person wills it to. }

{It’s an unspoken rule that you don’t delve into asking on who people used to be before they change unless they explicitly wish to talk about that with you.}

{…And even though Riri is saying that she’s fine with talking about anything..you get the feeling that may not be the case.}

{You figured you’d give Rewind the same courtesy. Even if she is some sort of astral being ..they’re still a person and everyone deserves that respect right?}

=> {It doesn’t matter who you are.}

{“..Does it matter?”}

{Riri looked at you startled, as if she wasn’t expecting that answer at all.}

{“..Why do I need to know who used to be? It feels ..kind of rude to just demand that of you?” }

{{“…I suppose you’re right, Plum. It doesn’t matter at all who I was! Just who I chose to be now!”}}

{{ “..And who I choose to be now is someone that guides you on your journey through the loops!”}}

#in cycles and cessation #isat spoilers #in stars and time spoilers #isat game #isat #in stars and time #in stars and time game #isat fanfic #isat au #in stars and time fanfic #in stars and time au #isat mirabelle #in stars and time mirabelle #mirabelle chevalier #icac rewind #the bitter ocean writes #isat act 3 spoilers #isat act 4 spoilers

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scionsthings · 3 days

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CHAVIER NATION ( composed by me and other 2 people i know ) TODAY WE RECEIVED A BEAUTIFUL GIFT

My dearest friend @lilithkan wrote a Chavier fanfiction for us and it's AMAZING

They asked me to publish it myself so here we go with a little highlight from me ( What did Bill do? Just read ;)) , comments and feedbacks are very much appreciated! Enjoy

Just for the ladies

Words: 1,597

Characters: Javier Escuella, Charles Smith, Bill Williamson

Rating: T

Warm flickers of flame from the candles created miniature light shows, while the popping noises from the bonfire created a peaceful atmosphere. It allowed the gang to have a calm evening, some of them were gathered at the table, but our attention is going to be next to the fire itself, where a couple of cowboys were sitting idly.

<<You want another drink?>>

Said Bill in a hoarse but playful tone, offering another one to Javier. Both their noses and cheeks were reddened by the effects of the tequila they were drinking.

<<O-of course, compadre!>>

Replied Javier, his tone of voice still cracking from laughing at a previous joke the two shared. Apparently… Bill thought that Charles, simply… Dressed terribly. Javier initially snickered at the fact that it was Bill Williamson, not exactly known for being well dressed himself, saying so about the hunter… But maybe the Mexican could lend the dark-skinned man some clothes and he wouldn't look too terrible as well.

As if it were foretold by fate… Or as they say, speak of the devil: Charles walked up to the bonfire, to then sit next to it, on a log. The mixed man had a plate of soup in his hands- apparently Pearson must've served dinner.

As Bill was pouring Javier another drink, the man currently wearing a sombrero turned to the hunter, who was idly minding his business, as usual. But the Mexican's inhibitions were partly gone due to the beverage he was drinking. So, as he sided towards Charles, Javier spilled some tequila on the ground due to the speed of the movement.

<<Hey! Don't waste it!>>

Bill's voice cracked, as if almost saddened by the waste. It did cost a lot, after all.

<<You know, the ladies said you'd be a catch if only you dressed a little better.>>

Javier said, with a small smirk drawn on his lips, implying subtly as a teasing joke to Bill that he was one of the “ladies”, due to reasons clearly unbeknownst to him. Bill didn't really seem to mind, either ignoring the joke or simply… Not understanding it.

<<Huh?>>

Replied Charles, barely looking up from his food.

<<I could dress you up a bit, see how you'd look with a more… Thought out, outfit.>>

Added Javier, his tone was genuine due to the fact that the thought of actually dressing the other up like a doll seemed kinda… Fun, unlike how it felt just a moment before when he was laughing at the idea.

Javier took a couple sips from the remaining tequila in his cup, and brought it quickly down on the log he was sitting on, with a thud.

<<What do you say, you in?>>

He then asked openly, leaning forward to the other a couple inches. Charles looked at the man in front of him, then the other behind him, catching a glimpse of him drinking… Once again, his gaze was on his food. He took another bite, to then slurp the remaining soup.

<<Sure. Why not.>>

Replied Charles, his tone of voice low and serious as usual- as if the situation needed his usual dire manners. And with that, the three got up and, as the two drunk ones in particular left a trail of little snickers behind them, they all got to where Javier slept. His stuff was neat and tidy, in contrast with most of the others’ things around there.

<<So, what are you thinking, Charles?>>

Javier asked, his voice modulated and fluctuating, almost rhythmic as if he were singing a song in his head and instinctively imitated its sound with his tone.

<<Nothing fancy.>>

Replied the hunter, his only wish being to not be ridiculed.

<<Oooh, but we wouldn't dream of that, now would we?>>

Said Bill, his voice was made more accentuated and a little dramatic by the alcohol in his veins.

<<Ugh.>>

This was Charles response- and with that, the Mexican began looking around his stuff, to then take out a white shirt, black pants and a blue jacket. Then, he lent them to Charles, with a playful and slightly mischievous grin drawn on his lips.

Charles’ expression was hardened, but it softened just a moment as the sight of a Javier that seemed just so… Excited, about something. Something that stupid, might he add. So, a light hint of a smile was drawn on Charles’ lips as he took the clothes in his hands.

_______________________________

<<¡Ayy! Soy estúpido, dìos mio.>>

Javier looked at the button on the ground. One of his best shirts, damaged because he didn’t think about the fact that Charles’ body type was… Different from his own.

And oh, he sure did notice that the buttons were having difficulty holding on, but he didn’t really mind the sight. And got distracted by… Definitely, nothing in particular. So, the thought of making him change back didn’t even cross his mind… And now, as Charles looked kind of embarrassed, Javier didn’t hold back the jacket he was keeping for the hunter, and on the contrary, he held it out for him to take.

<<With your chest out like that you’ll definitely attract alllll of the ladies.>>

The Mexican commented, somehow trying to lift up again the mood, but kind of in a clumsy way.

Charles’ lips curled for a moment in a small grimace of confusion, but his expression quickly turned back to his usual harsh one.

<<Are you sure? I may ruin this too.>>

The hunter said, his voice rough, referring to the jacket Javier was lending to him, ignoring his comment. The Mexican brought back the clothing attire for a moment, to look at Charles with a raised eyebrow. He then rolled his eyes and brought back up the jacket towards the mixed man.

<<Sì. Take it.>>

And with that, the hunter took the piece of clothing the other was lending him, to then put it on- only one arm, as he immediately felt that it was way too tight around his forearm.

Charles looked at this, then raised his sight back up to the Mexican as he heard Bill’s laughter in the background at that ridiculous sight of a giant man trying to wear smaller clothes. Charles groaned lightly, as Javier looked at that sight as well- but his expression wasn’t one of mockery as the bearded man’s, it was one of awe. The hunter had quite the defined muscles, which you could clearly see underneath the tight clothing.

<<Fuck this.>>

Said Charles, feeling mocked by the both of them. He took off the jacket and then the shirt, quickly putting back on his own blue one and walking away.

Javier looked at the mixed man as he did this, a disappointed look drawn on his face for a moment, then one of slight frustration. He looked at Bill, to then give him a slap on the back of his head.

<<¡Idìota!>>

Bill looked confused as Javier stormed off as well, walking up to Charles.

The hunter got to the side of the camp, looking at the trees, right behind Arthur’s tent. Javier got up to him, stumbling around due to the still lingering effects of the alcohol flowing in his veins.

<<Came to make a mockery out of me some more?>>

Said Charles, his arms crossed.

<<Just wanted to say that it's not exactly nice to leave that way without even saying bye. Loved the scene though, seemed like a teenage girl.>>

Replied Javier, his tone still mocking for some reason even though he literally went there to say sorry on behalf of Bill.

<<I’ll take that as a yes.>>

Said Charles, to then begin walking away again.

<<No, espera->>

The Mexican said, landing his hand on the other’s shoulder. He turned back around, looking at him with a slightly raised eyebrow.

<<I’m sorry for Bill’s behavior, Charles. But don’t mind him, he’s just an idiot, he doesn't mean any harm.>>

<<But you were mocking me too. I saw your little smile.>>

<<...Me?>>

Javier tilted his head slightly to the side, looking confused.

<<I didn’t and I wouldn’t->>

I mean, he would make fun of someone, but not Charles. Javier respected the hunter too much.

<<Yes you did. Don’t take me for an idiot. You thought I looked so ridiculous with your clothes that you became speechless.>>

<<I was just in… Awe, at… You have a great body, you know that?>>

Suddenly, Charles’ cheeks reddened but for a moment, drawing on his face a confused and surprised expression for the length of time of a flicker of the eye- easily missable.

<<Huh?>>

He couldn't say anything else. And because of that, Javier’s cheeks became red as well for a moment. The two of them could thank God that it was night and neither of them could see the other well.

<<We could… You know, go shopping instead. Buy some clothes that actually fit you, you know?>>

Said the Mexican, bringing together his hands for a moment out of nervousness, but hit them together instead of playing with them or anything of the sort.

The hunter moved his eyes around, looking for God knows what. Probably Bill, thinking that this might have been another way to make a fool out of him. But he didn't see him, and Javier seemed oh so genuine in his proposal. With a light grimace drawn on his face, Charles sighed, looking down for a moment, but quickly raised his sight back up at Javier.

<<...I’d like that.>>

Replied Charles, with a light smile finally drawn on his face.

#red dead redemption 2 #javier escuella #charles smith #bill williamson #chavier #Lilitkan's Fanfiction #My Art #IM SO HAPPY I LITERALLY ASKED FOR MEMES BUT MY FRIENDS IS SO WHOLESOME #Really hope y'all enjoyed it as I #i may publish it in ao3 too #in case i'll make a post to let you know ;)

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myfairstarlight · 2 days

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Good day friend! I've been really enjoying your takes for bridgerton this season :D Would love to hear your thoughts about part 2, particularly Colin's character portrayal if you're at all inclined!

Well hello there dear, thank you!

And what a coincidence, because Colin's portrayal, always the polarising topic in this fandom it seems, has been on my mind ever since I finished watching part 2... I shall ramble here then! I hope you do not mind a long answer, dear reader, for my last analysis post was not a quick read indeed. And I will now also stop trying to sound like Whistledown.

So, overall thoughts? I think he was handled mostly brilliantly, actually. And thus still despite the pacing issues (but that's an overall issue I have with the show, not specific to this season). Controversial take, already, so let's break it down a bit.

I will try to organise my rambling, but this is pretty much my immediate thoughts after watching the season. Perhaps I'll make a more organised and proper post later, adding Penelope's side, like my friends to lovers love letter, but we'll see! So:

Colin's journey to self-love

Because just like Penelope, though we arguably see it less, Colin has his own journey to loving himself because the thing with Colin is that he's still so insecure. Yes, he's more himself in part 2 now that he realised he's in love, he no longer tries to pretend to be someone he's not, but he still struggles to prove himself, and we see it in those last two episodes, when the truth is truly out. People are harsh on him for being so caught up in what Whistledown wrote and constantly celebrating the idea that LW might meet her demise, almost like a child who just got some sweets, but as we've seen in his discussion with Eloise after the reveal, it's because Whistledown calling him out at the beginning of the season for his new persona poked at his biggest insecurity, and he's still stuck on that, even more so now that he learns Penelope was behind the words, the one person who always made him feel seen and in this case, made him feel too seen. To me, him bringing up Marina so insistently was him grasping at straws, clinging to the one thing he knows for sure was unfair so he does not have to face the fact that what Penelope wrote was the truth (sidenote, was a little disappointed they did not have Penelope say she did try to talk to him about Marina but he literally did not listen and did not care that Marina loved another). He is still trying to find who he is and for a moment, he thought he had it, thanks to the very person now making him question everything all over again.

And oh boy does he not cope well.

Hero complex and what it means to be the man of the house

Colin has a hero complex. That's news to absolutely no one, unless you have not paid attention, so I won't make a list of the instances in previous seasons again. But we see it right away in e5 as he stands up for Penelope in front of Portia, then constantly shielding Penelope as soon as Cressida is involved. Penelope even thanks him for it, telling her no one has ever stood up for her of the sort, which fuels his hero complex. In fact, it is Colin's protectiveness that leads him to learn Penelope is Whistledown since he followed her out of worry, and that leads him to the realisation that she may not need him as much as he thought she did (and in his mind, perhaps she even just pretended to need him, to love him). And that, along with discovering that secret, shatters him. His whole sense of purpose, the one thing he thought he could for sure provide? Gone, just like that.

Even more so later when he learns she may be richer than him lol

So he overcompensates. When Cressida's blackmail is revealed, he does not listen, he jumps on the opportunity to prove himself, to protect his wife even if he's still mad at her, no one can disrespect her and his family so blatantly. As the man of the house, he needs to do what he must. And then he fucking fails and makes things far worse. And you know what? How satisfying it was that for once he failed, arguably when it was the most important for him, to remind him that hey, don't get on your high horse, listen to your wife and your family, don't try to handle everything on your own! (A lesson that Penelope also has to learn at the same time! That's marriage baby!) I like that he gets humbled twice, by Penelope and Cressida, the person he loves most and the one he despises so, yet they both throw the truth at him - he's privileged, as a man, and as a Bridgerton. He gets to question himself, travel to his whim, be even reckless like he just was because he will always have unconditional love from his family, but Penelope had to hide a part of herself to be able to do something she likes, meanwhile Cressida has to resort to questionable means to avoid getting married off to an old man. They do not have the luxury that Colin has to just do things. And it pains him to face that.

I've seen the sentiment that part 2 has Penelope be more assertive than Colin, with the dynamic shifting again when it should not, and while it is true she is the one who seeks him out more, it makes sense, she is seeking his forgiveness all throughout the last two episodes. I love her, but you cannot argue she is not at fault here and Colin deserves to be upset and a bit withdrawn as he deals with the conflicting feelings suddenly assaulting him. Yes the entrapment accusation hurt especially since he was the one who couldn't keep his hands to himself, but with his history after Marina, it makes sense that's what his hurt mind decides to focus on that, to justify the fact he's still so upset (It does bother me he never apologises for that comment though, at the same time Penelope doesn't hold it against him. They, or the writers, probably forgot about it.) But I would also argue that him being so troubled, is a proof of love, he even says so to Eloise "you are lucky you've never been in love" because if he wasn't, this would be much easier to deal with. Despite it all, he loves her, he chooses her, he will protect her, he must. He decides to sleep on the sofa to still stay close to Penelope despite the fact he could just sleep in one of the empty bedrooms. He still reassures her during their wedding, with one look encouraging her to walk more confidently down the aisle, and he holds her oh so tenderly when they dance at the wedding breakfast. He's so upset, but he's still so much in love. Of course, unlike part 1, there's no urgency or desperation on his part, there's no Debling threatening to take Penelope away, or him trying to earn back her favours so of course suddenly his displays of love feel less outward. But again, they're arguing, no he will not forgive her so easily, and that's a good thing, yet he's still here to support and protect her, and that says so much because again, he could just leave, that would have no consequence to him as a man. And in kind, Penelope makes an effort to do better as well, no longer witholding any secret from him, and he sees that.

And deep down, he understands Penelope, we see it when he confronts Cressida and perfectly described why Penelope became LW without her telling him in such words beforehand, because he's had similar struggles, he just needs to admit it, and be okay to show this vulnerability with her.

Colin's writer struggles and jealousy.

Now, I must admit, this was the weakest and a bit disappointing part of his arc to me, which is why I'm writing it last. I wish we could have had more time exploring that, and not just being told so (hopefully in s4? Assuming the writers won't pull a Kate and Anthony and constantly have them leave for no reason). This, however, adds to the previous part and Colin's struggle to provide, be the man of the house.

Here his wife is, an accomplished writer, even if under a pen name, who may be richer than he, oh how it must have deepened his insecurity. After all, if he cannot provide protection, or financial stability, then what good is he to her? What good are his silly journals when compared to that damn column that has all of Mayfair on a chokehold?

And yet.

Is it not telling and precious that he kept all of Penelope's letters? And that they're the catalyst of reminding him why he loves her so much, and how her love for writing and her cleverness shine through and that it is unfair of him to expect her to give it up when he himself aspires to be a writer? Writing is what brings them together truly, the same way writing letters to each other was the precursor for him realising his feelings as well. He is at peace then, Penelope is Whistledown, and she shines with her pen, and Colin fell in love with her quill, long ago, he was just overcome with grief to realise Whistledown held the same brilliance.

And sure, Penelope does not need him to provide, but she loves writing so much, and it inspires Colin in his own writing as well. And I also think it's super cute that he was going through a writer's block until Penelope told him she's loved him for years and suddenly the gates were opened (granted, this was before the reveal but now imagine post-reveal, as he struggles to edit and write, Penelope comes up beside him telling him he's doing well and boom, he's determined to write again).

But, back to the topic at hand, most importantly... he offers her love and support, even through all this battle, he unconsciously kept caring for her, and that's what Penelope craves, just someone there for her.

And that? That Colin can absolutely be, and he will proudly take on the role of her husband rather than "the man".

So I think this about wraps it up! Colin is the definition of a sensitive man trying his best to tough it up, a third son who struggles to find a place in this world. But he found a woman who does not need him to be what he is not, the one woman who will love him not for what he can provide, but for who he truly is, kind and incredibly empathetic. The one woman who fell in love with him because she made him fall off a horse and instead of yelling because of a bruised ego, he laughed at his own expense.

And I just think Colin Bridgerton is neat.

Also as I hit post it's 2AM for me so if some of this doesn't make sense, that's why, don't hold it against me, thank you dear one <3

#bridgerton #bridgerton thoughts #bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton season 3 #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #polin #character analysis #also anon if you were asking me my thoughts on his portrayal as in compared to the books i could make another post #but i'll spare yall that and just say show colin >>>>>#BUT writer colin was better handled in the book #star.txt

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