#I hope he's genuinely trying to protect Jin

[cryinginmyroomsposts]

Growing into Love

pairing:Husband!Seokjin x fem!reader

tags: fluff, slight angst, husband Jin, non-idol!au, Arranged marriage trope, mentions of parent issues

summary: Arranged marriage could've been a lot of things, but with Jin, it was nothing but comfortable. Maybe too comfortable that you hadn't realised when you'd both fallen in love.

masterlist | Let me know your thoughts and feedback.

“You know what Mom, I’m sorry. I thought, for once, you’d understand me but of course. My bad. Let’s just forget this. Bye.”

No matter how long it had been, it was never easy. Even years of therapy cannot make the complicated relationship between your parents and you easier to deal with. After everything said and done, you still did love your parents and you knew they loved you too. Even if they weren't great at depicting it without it affecting you.

It was tiresome nevertheless. The constant back and forth, you still hoping they'd understand even though they haven't in the last twenty-seven years and them hoping you'd finally see their side.

It had gotten easier when you had moved out after high school. You had enjoyed the taste of freedom and independence for 6 years since high school, mainly because you knew it came with a deadline- arranged marriage. It was a tradition in your family, everybody always got an arranged marriage. Even after knowing that it’s your destiny, the fear of “what ifs” had eaten you up for years.

For years you'd fought against it, but eventually, you lost all the will to fight and gave in. You had no choice. No matter how much you did, they always demanded more. Maybe you were to blame, for hoping even after everything.

With all the thoughts and the pain still fresh in your heart, you slump against the sofa on the floor throwing your phone on the coffee table. You're trying your best to not let the tears fall. Leaning your head back you just breathe and try to stop the well-known spiral that was going on in your brain.

"That bad huh?"

The voice startles you. You open your eyes to see your husband standing at the kitchen entrance looking at you. His wide shoulders clad in his favourite white t-shirt, a pink worn-out apron on his slender waist, glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, the soft features on his face slowly turning into concern as he assessed you.

Being married to Seokjin had been a pleasant surprise. Both of you knew what you were getting into, had spoken openly about your needs and kept to your boundaries. You understood that love was not exactly an option in your situation, but there was never any animosity between the two of you.

After a year of marriage, you'd become friends and partners/ teammates of sorts and constantly enabled each other to succeed. You had a routine, shared chores, shared your hobbies with each other and existed in perfect harmony. There was never a need or yearning for more, as it felt comfortably natural at every point.

Everything you'd learnt about him made you want to remove all the unfair pain he'd been through and protect him from further pain. One month into your marriage you got to know that his family had caused him a broken heart and forced him into this predicament. Yet he was always polite and nice to you and his family, and your respect for him grew multifold. Then you began noticing how he was often silent and blue when he thought no one was paying him attention. His smile faded every time he turned away from people which made you feel like it was you who was getting hurt.

But along the way, in the last year, Jin had genuinely become more balanced. His over-hyper nature around people and the eerily silent persona at home had slowly eased into a balance that dances on the verge of both. He makes you laugh almost every day, has cried in front of you a couple times and always cooked the most delicious meals every weekend. Jin was also a complete crackhead, especially when his younger brother Jungkook visits- which is almost all the time. Jungkook had been a big part of your life since your marriage and you would not have it any other way. Especially since it made Jin smile from his heart (and annoyed him to know bounds that you spoiled Jungkook).

"Y/N, are you okay?"

You blink at the voice, Jin is now crouching in front of you, back leaning against the coffee table as he looks at you. His eyes filled with worry, lips puckered and hair tousled. You bite your lips to prevent the threatening tears from falling down.

"Didn't you hear ?" You ask with a quivering voice, referring to the phone call you had with your parents moments ago.

"No, I was caught up in making lunch." He settles one hand on your shoulder in a pat. "But from the look on your face, I assume it didn't go well. If you want to talk, you know I'm here."

You nod, blinking more furiously in a futile attempt. He smiles and wipes the tears away.

"It's ok to cry, we spoke about this."

"I know. That's what I'm doing." You say as more tears fall and a smile graces your face. "Aha, I know what will cheer you up." His eyes widen and a mischievous smile plays on his face as you look at him in confusion. "I'll call Jungkookie, you are always happy when he annoys me. I don't get it but it'll work for now." You look at him for a moment to gauge how serious he is and end up laughing when he picks up his phone to call the younger one.

"No no Jin don't call kookie. Poor thing, he really wanted to sleep in this weekend. Plus he really needs to start hanging out with people other than us." You say between laughing as Jin puts his phone down.

"Hmmm," he thinks as he absentmindedly wipes more of your tears away and you're watching in anticipation waiting for his next suggestion. "In that case, maybe ice cream will help?" He asks with big eyes and a pout, looking like an innocent child. You immediately nod like an excited 5-year-old at his suggestion.

Jin brings you the ice cream tub you'd both bought at the supermarket and hands over a spoon.

"Here, enjoy!" "Hehe thanks, I love you. You're the best Jin." "Aissh, love you too. I'll go check on lunch. don't eat too much."

You were about to hum back in response but froze mid-action, ice cream spoon on the tip of your tongue. Your eyes widen in reaction and you drop the spoon on the floor. This causes Jin to stop midway to the kitchen and look at you.

"Y/N, are you okay?" He says rushing to your side. You just look at him in pure shock.

"We, I- we-" The words fail to come out of your mouth and your mind is a mess. "We what?" He asks, the concern back on his face.

"wesaidiloveyou" The words leave your mouth in such a hurry that Seokjin almost misses it. When he realises he gets more confused and replies with a shrug, "Yeah so?"

"What do you mean so? We said THE words Seokjin." The incredulous look on his face stays put and you add, "For the first time."

He scoffs and smiles. "This is not the first time."

"What?"

His smile falters, "You don't remember?" "Remember what? Jin don't mess with me now." Your voice is timid and you feel a giant lump creeping up your throat.

"You're the one messing with my head right now. Do you really not remember saying I love you to me that night?" He looks at you in disbelief, ears reddening and his pout in full display. "What night?"

"Y/N, come on seriously?" "I really don't remember Seokjin."

He stares at you for a moment too long, sighs and walks back to the kitchen. You close the ice cream tub and run to follow him in. He's stirring the stew in the pot and even though his back is facing you, you don't miss the agitation in his movements. You wait for him to close the lid on the pot and watch as he just stares at the wall. Slowly you move closer to him but he whips around even before you could tap on his shoulder, and looks at you.

"Jin, I really do not remember what you are referring to and I'm sorry. Just tell me when it was, please." You give him your best puppy eyes and he sighs leaning his head back on the shelf above, before facing you again.

"The night after we went to your cousin's wedding, in bed, before sleeping you told me you love me and I said it back." Your jaw drops to the floor. "That was three months ago," is all you say as you try your best to jog your memory of the night.

That had been a particularly rough family function- with your father questioning every career choice you had made, your mother constantly criticising your outfit choice and every other relative asking you only about your plans to have kids. Seokjin had been very comforting and stayed by your side the entire night. You remember how his hand never moved from the small of your back the entire night and how he kept running circles on your palm whenever he held them. That night you were sure you had fallen for Seokjin, but you did not remember vocalising it to him. And definitely did not remember him saying it back.

Jin's strained sigh brings you back to the man in front of you, he is doing his best to look positive and lighthearted about this and you can see it.

"Why didn't you bring it up the next day?" You wanted to say sorry, you wanted to hug him but this was the only sentence that came out of your mouth. "I figured you said it in a sleepy daze. And maybe you didn't mean it." Jin sounds so small and nervous at the moment.

"But then it happened again." He adds before you can say anything and all you can say is, "HUH?"

He rubs his palm on the back of his neck and nods. "Yeah, actually you've said it 7 times in the last three months including today."

"WHAT?" Jin looks as shocked as you do at this revelation.

"Why the hell do I not remember it?" "How the hell am I supposed to know." Jin's voice comes out sharper and you realise how all of this might be for him. But he turns back to the dish on the stove and you are left to jog your memory to see if he was right.

"The second time was when I bought you the big chocolate cake when you were on your period- two months back," Jin says in the most neutral tone and the memory comes back to you.

You hadn't even informed him about your periods, he somehow always knew. But you were positively shocked when he walked into your shared bedroom with a chocolate cake in his hand, explaining that it will ease your cramps. It might've been possible that you voiced the exact feeling you were having in a moment of joy.

"Then it was a week later when you were leaving for work." Jin is now back to stirring and assessing his pot and his voice seems muffled.

"When?" He turns to look at you for a brief second, he assesses your confused face and turns back smirking.

"You said 'I love you bye' on your way out the door, I knew you didn't realise it. In fact, you did this again twice, Kookie was here during the fifth time."

"Wha- How... Do I have memory loss?" Jin turns around and you can see the smile he's trying to control. "Don't laugh, Jin. How else do you explain my not remembering saying it?" He stays leaning on the counter with his smirk playing on his face and says, "So you definitely don't remember drunkenly professing your love for me last week and then proceeding to cuddle me the entire night until I laid you on the bed in the morning right?"

If you were shocked till now it was nothing compared to this bombshell Jin dropped on you.

"Are you lying?", "No why would I!" Jin looks convincingly innocent but it only worsens your confusion. How did you miss such an important moment of both of your lives. Your husband loves you and has said so multiple times but your brain has successfully managed to forget that. You try your best to remember but nothing out of the ordinary jumps from your brain.

He breaks down laughing- screeching noises and all, as he watches you process it. Your first reaction, post-shock, is to hit him in the arms and exasperatedly pout.

"Jin, that's not fair. Why the hell did you not tell me any of this ?"

He sobers up then and stands in front of you, holding both your shoulders and a sweet smile on his face. "I didn't mean to hide it, I just thought you didn't want to bring it up. Y/N, you told me yourself that you're a flight risk and that you weren't looking for love. I didn't want to make you panic."

"Aww that's sweet of you." He nods annoyingly smug and you roll your eyes. "But I still feel horrible that I didn't even notice it fully. I mean.. how does one forget that?" Jin shakes his head at your words and gives a little squeeze to your shoulder as he says, "You didn't forget it, it just came so naturally to you that it wasn't a big deal."

You look up at his eyes hearing his words. "Was it the same for you?" Jin gulps and rubs the back of his neck again. He's turning redder by the minute and you love seeing him like this. "Well, yeah. I actually said it a week before you did for the first time." You open your mouth to react but he interrupts you. "And no, you didn't forget it. I was scared and told it when you were sleeping."

"When?"

"Aiish, I don't remember Y/N." He's almost as red as a tomato now. You scoff at his words. "Oh please, you just listed the 7 very random days I told you I love you. And I know for a fact you remember when you first said it. Spill it, Jin." Jin is fully blushing and you're sure you are too by how heated up your cheeks feel. You continue riling him up by poking his arms till he swats you away and answers your question.

"I- Oh god stop Y/N, I'll tell.", "Okay, go on."

"It was the night you suggested we sleep in the master bedroom together because you felt it was unfair that I had to sleep in the guest room." Jin covers his hands in his face and cringes at himself while you've got the biggest smile playing on your face. You start giggling and that makes him look up from his hands with a pout.

"Ya don't laugh at me!" "No, no I'm not laughing at you. It's just... that's all it took for you to fall in love with me?"

His face immediately changes from his pout to a soft smile. "That's because I didn't fall in love, and neither did you.", "Oh." You try your best to let it not show but you know that your face has deflated just the way your heart felt.

Jin notices it and smiles before adding, "We didn't fall in love, we grew into it, and that's much better. I've fallen in love before and you know what, when you fall it feels like you're flying until you crash. I think falling in love is a sad thing." He moves closer and holds your face in his palms as you look up at him without breaking eye contact. "With you, with us, we didn't fall and we won't crash. I've been in a relationship where even the smallest things were a big deal- every 'I love you' and anniversary. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, I'm just saying I really do prefer how natural it feels to just say I love you and not make a big deal of it. With you, specifically. I love how we just started doing things together without overthinking it. So yea, we grew into loving each other."

By the time he is done you're eyes are watering and the tears flow down your cheeks. He wipes them away and you just stare at him, thinking about his words. He was right, almost all of your firsts since your wedding have been entirely unspoken. One day you just cuddled against him while watching a movie and neither of you questioned it. Or when he randomly pulled you in a bear hug and cried after a tough day, or when he comforted you during your family functions and you did the same. Even when you were busy trying to fight off any feelings because of your fear, you couldn't succeed. It all felt natural.

"Y/N, please don't cry. You've been crying since the damn phone call and now I've made you cry too." You shake your head sideways and pull him into an embrace, leaning your head on his chest and sniffling your tears in. He rubs your back trying to calm you down, which you do because Jin always knows how to calm you. You lift your head from his chest and look at him, still in a tight embrace.

"How are you this smart and amazing?" He smiles shyly and then smirks before adding, "I am 3 years older than you and I know a lot more than you do!"

"Tch, what a shame I didn't record that and send it to Jungkook. He'd be so happy to see you admit that you're old." You tease and Jin looks at you in mock anger which causes you to laugh.

"I've been realising it here and there but like you said nothing felt out of the ordinary or uncomfortable enough to question it. So... okay I agree, we grew into loving each other." Jin nods with a fond smile. "Now what?" you add with raised eyebrows watching keenly as Jin smirks and his hug around you gets tighter. Your face heats up as he leans into you slowly, your eyes trained on those plump lips of his that have always caught your attention. You close your eyes and wait for his lips to hit your lips and finally fee-

TRIINGGGGG

The sound of Jin's ringtone blaring from his pant pocket makes both of you jump away from the embrace. Recovering faster from the shock, Jin picks up the phone and curses as he shows you the called ID- Jungkook.

You laugh as Jin attends the call and immediately starts cursing the younger one and Jungkoook lets out his usual Elmo giggles and shouts for you to support him.

Jin was right, this all felt natural. This is your family, your home and you'd cherish it forever.

[bihanspookies]

Okay Jin and Hwoarang are rivals when it comes to fighting, how about them also being rivals when it comes to the reader’s heart? Do you think you can write something about that, and how they each would try to win the reader’s affection in their own way🤭

Omg yes of COURSE

The first Tekken ask 👹

LESGET IT

Okay so actually I think they would attempt to woo you the same way just done differently. Jin is more quiet stoic, calculated while Hwoarang is loud, cocky, and not reckless per say but you know, he’s willy nilly.

Jin brings you your fav drinks, takes you out to lunch, will give you his coat if it’s a little too chilly outside. He will reprimand you for not being fully covered but it’s not mean in anyway, he just cares about you. He prefers to show his interest in you with actions rather than words.

Hwoarang will bring you stuff and then add on a “That’s your favorite right? I just know you so well.” But it’s not snarky or annoying, especially when he gives you that smirk, you find it endearing. It’s cold out? Puts his jacket on you but grumbles about how you should’ve worn something warmer.

Give them a thanks and appreciative smile and you’ll have them right in the palm of your hand.

They’d both ask you out on a date, just bc it’s common courtesy but also I think they’d both be the type to just show up at your house and be like “🧍 so… date?”

Jin I think would take you somewhere peaceful like maybe a botanical garden OR a drive on his motorcycle to the beach. Anywhere where you two can be around each other without many distractions. He wants to focus on you.

Hwoarang would take you for a ride on his motorcycle as a date. Take you around the city for sightseeing or to see this local rock band that’s in town. He wants to spend time with you and he wants to see you having fun doing things he enjoys. Of course he’ll do things you like too but he wants to show you his world first.

When it comes to actually flirting like with WORDS, they’re diff in that category.

Jin’s admiring you in silence, how you carry yourself and how you make him feel so at ease. He feels safe around you and wants to convey it with a protective arm around your shoulders or locking your pinky with his. He may not be like Hwoarang who isn’t afraid to to be flirty but when Jin DOES flirt, he’s very smooth with it and it always catches you off guard. Says you have something on your cheek and very casually wipes it off and holds the side of your face for a few more seconds longer than needed.

Hwoarang on the other hand, like I said is not afraid to be a flirty little creature. Compliments your looks, says one liners, tells you you should hold onto him tighter while you’re on the back of his motorcycle. BUT! He’s not over the top about it. He knows the limit and the fine line between genuine flirting and just love bombing you. He’ll test the waters to see if you’re okay with physical touch by wrapping his arm around your shoulders or a hand on your back to guide you through a crowd and once you’re out he’ll leave it there to see if you push him off. If you don’t then he’ll slide his hand down to hold yours. Says nothing and laces your fingers together as if nothings changed

When it comes to CONFESSING

Jin wouldn’t outright say “I like you”, he’ll tell you how you make him feel though. Safe, happy, calm, and all those emotions he’s not used to feeling. He says he wants to spend more time with you and hopes you can accept his feelings (even tho he knows exactly how you feel about him)

Hwoarang would tell you he likes you but then immediately add on how much fun you two have, how there’s never a dull moment, and how you make him feel like there’s more to life than just fighting (and his rivalry with Jin lmao)

WHEN IT COMES TO A KISS

Jin asks you if he can kiss you, hand to your cheek and giving you A Look™️. He’ll put a hand on the small of your back and guide you towards him as he leans down for a smooch.

Hwoarang I think unfortunately will be like those guys who wait for you to look at him so he can make the move 💀 but he’s looking at you with such tender eyes that you can look past it. He def grabs your chin (softly) and leans in slow enough for you to pull away if you want.

Overall they have their own ways of showing their affection, it just depends who calls to your heart more 🫶

[yannig]

And this right here is the first proof we have that Huaien is lying to Xiaobao.

Of course, he's lying on his background as a bodyguard, but that's different from lying to Xiaobao's face - it's a general cover that the Jin's men discovered through investigation. It's not directly relevant to their relationship.

But the rest of it? I'm expecting most if not all of the stories about his family to be truthful - as well as his disbelief in love. Sure, he's hiding a lot, but most of what he's revealed to Xiaobao was likely true.

It doesn't, however, mean that it was genuine. I was asking last week if Huaien's vulnerability was genuine or a calculated way to manipulate Xiaobao. I'm of the opinion it's going too quickly to be entirely genuine - Huaien doesn't strike me as the type to make love declarations that early.

This lie proves that it is at least part of said vulnerability is manipulative. He pretends to have sacrificed a great deal to save Xiaobao when in reality his mission was perfectly fulfilled. Of course the document he gave whoever this asshole is was a decoy; Huaien isn't stupid.

But he nods when Xiaobao asks if he gave their attacker what he wanted, lying to cement the idea that he's falling in love with Xiaobao and that he's ready to risk his father's anger for him. It's the first clear confirmation we have that he's purposefully manipulating Xiaobao.

Of course, it comes to bite him in the ass instantly when his father's next order it to kill the Jin family, which actually puts him in a situation where he has to chose between his father and Xiaobao.

Up to that point, he could tell himself that every time he was allowing Xiaobao close, it was for the good of the mission. That he was seducing him to use him to get the accounting book. That he was being vulnerable and open to manipulate Xiaobao and not because he was enjoying his attention, his care, his warmth. That he was protecting him to endear Xiaobao to him and not because he cares about him. That he was being possessive because the seduction plan will work better is Xiaobao's attention is focused solely on him.

Now though? Now he's going to have to make a choice.

Does he follow his father's orders in hope that he will actually give him his freedom, but lose Xiaobao's warmth?

Does he try to pretend he followed his orders while hiding Xiaobao somewhere?

Or worse, does he fully disobey his father and try to save the whole family, because Xiaobao has both shown and stated that he'll be sad if his family dies?

[doumadono]

mmm emergency request

take as long as you need to answer!! or if this is too triggering, no need to answer at all!!

tw for mention of childhood m*lestation

so recently (couple of weeks ago) i found out that my dad’s friend/girlfriend kind of knows the guy who m*lested me as a kid…

she knows everything that happened and knows how difficult it was for me to heal from. now finding out that she knows him— it set me back and i distanced myself from her.

a bit ago she called me, telling me that i should forgive him for what he did to me… and it went into a whole thing and now i’m trying not to cry while writing this lol

but anyways

it set me back really far and all of my progress is gone so i was just hoping for some comfort??

like twice or dabi comforting their gf/s.o. through this and helping them try to heal again.

maybe even twice or dabi getting a bit of revenge on the two people lol /j

sorry if this doesn’t make sense i’m just a bit out of it

- twice & dabi anon

EMERGENCY REQS MASTERLIST

Twice

Twice is initially shocked and angered when he learns about your troubled past and the person responsible for your pain.

He lets out a string of curses directed at the one who caused you harm, showing a protective side that you hadn't seen before.

Immediately, Twice pulls you into a comforting embrace.

"I might be a bit crazy, but I'm crazy about you. We'll get through this together, I'll never let you face it all alone."

After learning more about the person who hurt you, Twice puts together a plan for justice. "Nobody messes with my girl and gets away with it."

He ensures you have the support you need, encouraging you to take good care of yourself and promising to be there for every step of your healing journey.

As you try to hold back tears, Twice pulls a playful expression, "And if you need someone punched, I got a clone for that too. Or ten."

Twice is genuine, realizing that some battles require a team effort, and mental health is no exception.

Later, you discover Jin had discreetly gathered information to ensure the person responsible faced the consequences.

Twice, without a moment's hesitation, serves justice to the person who has caused you harm.

One day, accidentally overhearing him in conversation with Toga, you catch her asking for "the blood of his new friend." The request surprises you, but you eventually shrug it off.

The next day, Twice seeks you out and declares that the case is concluded, justice served.

When you express a desire to learn more, he simply smiles at you, smoothly shifting the topic, leaving the details in the shadows of his actions. "Don't worry, little mousie, Twice did his best to make sure they won't hurt you ever again."

Dabi

Dabi listens silently as you open up about your troubled past. His eyes, however, betray a mix of anger and concern.

"No one should go through that. I'll make sure they pay for what they did to you, princess."

Dabi, in his understated way, offers a warm touch, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. "Don't think about that anymore. Let me take care of everything."

Dabi, true to his straightforward nature, ensures justice is served.

As you express your fear of encountering your past abuser, Dabi assures you, "I won't let them get away with it, don't ya worry your pretty, little head, princess."

Dabi, true to his character, never utters empty promises. Swiftly acquiring information about the person's name and address, he becomes a rare sight within the League of Villains' hideout for the next few days. Unbeknownst to you, he meticulously stalks every move of the individual, methodically transforming their life into a nightmare.

Days pass, and news reports flood the airwaves. Resting your head on Dabi's shoulder while watching the news, you hear of a house engulfed in flames, with a person unable to escape the inferno. The police chalk it up to a gas leak, citing eyewitnesses who observed the flames as an eerie shade of blue.

Your eyes widen, and you glance at Dabi, seeking confirmation. "Dabi..."

He, however, responds by gently placing his index finger to your lips, silencing any questions. "I promised you something, and I'm a man of my word, yeah?"

[chimchimmarie]

OUT OF THE FRIEND ZONE (Part Two)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Genre: College Au, Friends to Lovers

Word Count: 1,500ish

Summary: Jimin finally realizes he wants out of the friendzone, but will you feel the same way when he finally makes his feelings known?

AN: I finally found the time to write pt. 2. I hope you like it. I listened to “Fire Away” by John Michael Howell while writing this.

Read Part One.

The mood in this movie night has quickly shifted from playful banter between friends into one in which you feel judged for sharing that you had finally met someone. You feel yourself crawling into yourself more and more. For a moment, it feels like your friends were ganging up on you, deeming you as some unattractive, poor excuse for a woman who is unworthy of attention and love.

They didn’t actually say that, of course. But your mind has gone into the rabbit hole of overthinking that fast. At this point, you believe it’s becoming more of a second nature to you. You just can’t help it, and you hate yourself for it.

The whole conversation had really made you so self-conscious. You genuinely believe that Taehyung doesn’t mean to hurt you in any way. He’s not a bad person. He’s your best friend. But sometimes words could cut even if you don’t intend them to.

You just don’t get why he just had to make it sound like you’re making the biggest mistake of your life, that you’re being crazy for wanting to finally date.

What’s wrong with dating anyway? Don’t you have a right to meet guys and go out on actual dates?

Are you really that awful as a person to the point that even your friends would forbid you to go out with a guy you think is great?

You feel so betrayed. What kind of friends would gaslight you into thinking you aren’t good enough to date?

And if they tell you one more time that this is them being protective of you, then they’re being complete jerks. This is absurd, you think. You’re a consenting adult, capable of making choices for yourself. And you don’t need to be babied like a middle schooler.

By the time Jimin showed up, Taehyung started acting more frantic than he was prior. He’s still going on and on on why you can’t be thinking about going out with Namjoon. The other guys chimed in, too. Going so far as judging him because he’s a varsity player. But you genuinely think that Namjoon looks decent and nice for someone who plays sports.

He’s nothing like most jocks you’ve come across with in campus. Most of which have either been a fuckboy or a totally egotistic maniac. Namjoon was a great guy. And all these misconstrued notions they have of him is getting in your nerves.

Jimin has been quiet ever since. He hasn’t said a single word to you. He didn’t back you up like he usually does. He’s being too quiet, actually. You’ve been trying to catch his eyes but he hasn’t looked at you since he entered the room. He also suddenly picked a seat on the floor, instead of his usual spot next to you. It’s almost as if he’s suddenly ignoring you.

Feeling so frustrated, you fire back at Taehyung, raising your voice and startling everyone in the room.

“And why should I listen to you!? You’re not my dad, none of you are! You can’t tell me what I can or cannot do! ”

“Oh come on, that’s not even what I’m trying to do, y/n. I’m just worried about—“

“Worried about what?? Can’t you just be happy for me for once?! Damn it Tae!”

“Hey, hey, guys… Stop it. We came here to watch a movie and hang out. Come on.” Jin tries to pacify the tension while blocking your view of Taehyung.

“Right. I’m sorry Y/N. I didn’t mean to—“

You didn’t even let Tae finish, you stood up and made a beeline for the door.

Before you could hit the elevator button, a firm warm hand grips on your wrist.

“Y/n. Please… Don’t leave.”

You recognize Jimin’s voice. You feel the warmth of his body close to you. His scent overpowering you for a moment.

You scoff as you try to pry your hands away.

“So, now you speak. Where were you when Tae was in my face the whole time in there?”

You turn around with much force, yanking your arm away from his hold.

“He doesn’t mean it. He’s just—”

“—being Tae. Right. And I’m supposed to just let it slide, like every time?” You cut him off. Frustration and disappointment laced heavily in your tone.

“You know what, I’m sick and tired of taking all this shit from you guys. Whenever I talk to you about my dating life, you get like this. EVERY. DAMN. TIME! Am I not allowed to do that? Is there some kind of rule that I cannot go out there and meet people? I know you guys care about me, but for crying out loud, stop treating me like the helpless little sister you never had!”

The silence that followed your outburst was excruciating. Jimin was wide eyed as he watches you lash out on him, mouth agape and jaw stuttering before he could manage to respond.

“That’s not how I ever saw you.” His voice was soft it’s almost a whisper.

“What?” You ask.

“I never saw you as just a little sister y/n.” Jimin pauses to look at you.

You don’t understand where he’s trying to go with this but you keep mum and decide to let him talk.

“You were more than just that to me. You have no idea.” He scoffs. He keeps his eyes on you as continues to speak his mind.

“And can you please stop thinking that we’re ganging up on you. That we don’t care. That we’re out here to hurt you—God! That’s the last thing we’d ever want for you! And Tae—he’s just trying to… get me to do something about it.”

“About what?” You press him to go on.

Jimin seems hesitant to speak again but he decides it was now or never.

“Y/n, listen to me. Don’t go out with Namjoon. I—“

“Jimin, not you too! For fuck’s sake just—“

“I like you, okay!! There! I said it! I like you!” He cuts you off, hands thrown in the air.

You stop moving and breathing altogether. His sudden confession rendered you unable to speak. You didn’t really know how to respond to that. You feel like you’ve been blindsided by your best friend. You just stood there with eyes bulging, seemingly shocked at what he had just blurted out. Before you could figure out what to say, he’s talking again.

“Look, this isn't how I wanted to do this. Part of the reason Tae acted so rashly is because he knows I was supposed to tell you tonight after the movie but.. you just—I mean, you’ve started seeing people and you’re not supposed to—I mean, I can’t dictate what you can or cannot do.. but.. I haven’t… I just… I had to— God, why is this so hard!? I feel like an idiot!”

Jimin pauses to catch his breath. He rakes his fingers through his hair as frustration starts to crawl up to him.

Taking a step closer to where you’ve been frozen in place, Jimin takes your trembling hands in his. In another breath, he bares his soul to you.

“I’m in love with you y/n. I have for quite some time now. I just— I haven’t been brave enough to admit it. Even to myself. But I want to change that now. And this is me finally doing what I should have done the first time I realized it.”

Jimin watches you for any reactions. But you’re beyond speechless with how things turned out. You’re suddenly hyperaware of his existence in front you.

He’s held you like this before, so many times actually that you’ve lost count already. But the touch of his skin and the way he tightens his grip suddenly feels foreign to you. It almost feels wrong. Like he’s not supposed to hold you like this. He’s your best friend. He’s not supposed to touch you and tell you these absurd things while looking at you like… like he… like he’s actually in love with you.

“Please say something?” He demands with his voice that suddenly sounds so sweet yet yearning.

You look into his eyes as your mind goes haywire in full panic mode and all you can think of doing at the moment is the one thing you genuinely believe you’re good at—running.

And so that’s what you do. You run.

You run from this situation. From your best friend. From the feelings that suddenly feels so suffocating.

Your voice finds you as you tremble and break the contact to hastily step back into the elevator.

“I… I can’t— I can’t do this.. Jimin, I—I’m sorry.”

As you wait for the doors to close., the last image you see is Jimin’s hopeful eyes morph into pain. Like someone just ripped his heart out of his chest.

Part Three tbc.

[mejomonster]

Just watched till the end of the moon ep 9:

I'm so down bad for these 2

I cannot stress enough that skipping them to marriage so no stupid "innocence" or naivety stuff as is the usual situation is here

I cannot stress enough how much I LOVE that li susu seems adult, mature, seasoned in battle love etc, and just generally like a late 20s early 30s adult trying to save the world instead of a young adult Hero and how nice it is. Just for me, I'm happy for the variety

I LOVE tantai jin. He's a fucked up guy. He's the wet skinny pathetic man fangirls always say they want. He's genuinely a pretty cold bitch AND he gets to be lead (in a cdrama!). He is monstrous cause bitches have treated him monstrous so like susu said! He responded to a cruel world with cruelty back. It's not a lead I'm used to but I AM loving it. I also love how for him a kind gesture really is worth it's weight in gold like? For him. As awful as ye xiwu was in marriage pre susu, as much as susu literally said she wants to kill him more than anyone else in the world... she keeps saving him. Giving him food. Risking HER life for his. And for him those specific actions are worth more than anything anyone's ever given him. Maybe even more than what Lan gave him, since at least ye xiwu is upfront about wanting to imprison him and being mad at him so like she probably isn't going to "secretly" betray him since she's fairly honest (now). I love that he is JUST a fucked up guy with a fucked up destiny meant to be devil God, who the universe was probably intentionally shitty to cause its hoping (on like a cosmic scale) he will Suffer and Die and become devil God in revenge. I love that its not trying to make the bitch noble. He is who he is. For whatever that means, it's just a story about 2 people who'd never have met. But susu has changed the trajectory just by being herself around him and it's COMPELLING.

The transformative power of love (or simply being kind to another person) and all that. How the cursed jade said she's mostly just SO SURPRISED someone would help another person. I feel like that's probably the Theme of the show right there. Even susu is probably surprised by herself helping him. And in the jade transfer moment, I think she's surprised she genuinely does NOT think he only is comprised of bad traits. For all the cold bitch that he is, betraying her that he's done, cruel view he has of the world... actions speak louder than words to susu too. And for all the bad he's done... he has also done some good things. And she finds herself seeing him in shades of grey instead of a monster like she expected to.

I just love their bickering lets be real. Susu just SAYS shit on the top of her mind (to be fair tantai jin is a bitch and deserves to be bitched at). But she's like "from now on let's have NO CONNECTION" to 6 hours later being like "your life is in my hands and I say when you can die I'm imprisoning you forever ill see you nonstop bitch." And it's like... susu honey, that was LITERALLY tantai jins plan to do to you like 6 hours ago. Yall have the same plan. Just who's the prisoner is switched lmao. No wonder he's oddly attracted to you. You see him being a big manipulative bitch and like you're not stealthy, but you ARE like "WELL FINE ill say some SHIT and BREAK YOUR HEART then. Cry me a river! Oh you thought I was dead? You cried? GOOD. Now anyway fight is over as long as I'm winning!"

Their emotional fights are both ridiculously huge (like rumor of the Kingdoms wild) but also so shallow cause these bitches will be like "I DECIDE when you DIE" then you find them clutching each other in the woods BOTH unwilling to abandon the other and BOTH taking life threatening damage trying to protect the other and BOTH trying to then heal said damage of each others! Like. That's just so fucking funny??!! And fun. Xiao Lin is going to be like "what in the world??" But move on

Anyway speaking of Xiao Lin: I love how he genuinely seems to care for tantai jin! Probably only person in the world who does! I hope one day tantai jin finds out its genuine heartfelt care for him. Buy knowing tantai jins life... he's going to do some awful shit to Xiao lin that ruins his life or kills his wife or kills thousands of innocents in front of him, THEN Xiao lin will be breaking down crying how he never thought tantai jin would do this and he thought tantai jin was a good person who wanted to avoid seeing the ppl in harm and he always wished tantai jin could have a better life. And then tantai jin, probably newly learning compassion from enough bullshit attempts with susu, that his own heart will be breaking BECAUSE of the consequences of his own actions. So. Thrilled to cry later I guess

Speaking of susu and tantai jin. tantai jin LAYING ON HER SHOULDER THINKING ABOUT WHAT SHE BULLSHITTINGLY SAID LOVE WAS AND HOW HE THINKS SHE LOVES HIM AND HOW HE THINKS HE MIGHT LOVE HER AND CUDDLING

that is what watchers want!! (At least me!!) Men lying heads on their lovers shoulders and thinking dreamy about them

Bai Lu gives off such bisexual lead energy tho even without a woman to flirt with I'm sure thats part of the appeal for me. Bottom line is I like in my b/g romances on occasion (who am I kidding more of the time than not) to have a dominant kind of woman. And bai lu delivers. Her man leans on HER shoulder. Is carried around her shoulder with HER arms.

Speaking of, people who cast this were 1. Fulfilling so many wishes letting Luo yunxi just play PURE FUCKED UP and I love it. 2. By casting him as this suffering Weak physically nearly always dying willfully little skinny twink of a man, who's also God tier powerful especially with rage, who's costume entails constant bloody whump, collars, choking and ropes, like. There's a HELLA SPECIFIC NICHE Luo yunxis character resides inside this show and it sure is feeding That Demographic. I'm up for it. It's like if mo ran and chu wanning had a fucked up mashup

I'm fearing the jade maker witch was somehow susu in a past life and now I'm wondering if time travel is gonna be in this bitch

If there IS time travel? I really like the idea of tantai jin specifically time traveling the 2nd time around, once he and susu fell in love, once he knows what susu knew from the beginning. I think that could open a lot of new avenues that he is not currently able to go into given his current personality and knowledge

It's still funny as hell to me tantai jin is kind of angling for death cause he KNOWS he gets super-powered once he dies. But his wife keeps being like NO BITCH YOU GOTTA LIVE WELL. And I'm hoping eventually he's like: maybe she's right... maybe the revenge means more if I'm alive for it and not dissassociated. Maybe I SHOULD try to become a God tier monster without dying. Which would still lead to oh no devil tantai jin lol, but a version of it that is fully Himself which I would like

You know I'm liking a show when I'm contemplating binging beyond what's on youtube rn

[yuri-is-online]

I’ve been playing so much Tokyo debunker since it came out CAUSE THE STORY IS SO GOOD LIKE OMLL I’ve currently started the jabberwock story and I’m liking it so far honestly! When I first started my favorites were Lucas (and kaito, mainly bc both of them reminded me of adeuce in a way) but now I’m all sho. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH LIKE ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY. And also screw Leo, I’m glad the few people I’ve seen who play Tokyo debunker all collectively hate him.

(Sorry for the rambling btw I’m just glad to see someone plays Tokyo debunker!)

I made you a meme my annon friend I hope you like it (this is a ramble welcome zone, I'm happy to hear from you friend ♡)

I WAS SO HOPEFUL ABOUT LUCA AND KAITO. I love adeuyuu's dynamic... but it is probably for the best that tdb didn't try to copy that. I hope we get more interactions with them in the upcoming chapters TᴖT I don't want to spoil Jabberwock for you but I need to see Luca, Kaito, and Sho's reactions... and Jin, Alan, and Tohma but meh. Bring me the bandanna boy-

Sho... i have shomany thoughts... girlies on the reddit pointed out he probably just gave MC the fixings from the fridge so he could have an excuse to hang out...

"I need your help with this, senpai." Sho says that a lot I think, always asking MC to come along and do something with him. He gives you the fixings and makes sure to flex when he picks up the refrigerator, trying to ignore how excited your wide eyes make him feel. He knew this was going to be a good idea, he loves how amazed you get over such simple things. His cooking? "Senpai I need your help testing this recipe." You give genuine compliments and are always so excited when he shares it, it should make him sick. Bonnie? You coo over her so much he actually gets jealous of his own damn bike. "That's enough senpai, you'll spoil her." It's usually annoying being the junior but he LOVES using the kohai card, especially on the Frostheim ghouls. "Sorry I need senpai right now, it's really urgent."

He's got a million little excuses for why he needs to see you senpai, all of them with an excuse to show off how useful he is. You'll see, your kohai really is the only one for the job of protecting you~

[dangermousie]

You can tell Susu is hardcore gone for TTJ because she is genuinely jealous of Bingchang. Earlier, when she was emotionally not involved, she clearly got that TTJ was only interested in Bingchang because he was imitating Xiao Lin but now she’s involved emotionally, she is not clear headed at all.

Their terrible fight is, ironically, another proof of her feelings. Because if she was not involved, she’d just lie and say whatever to maintain her precious nails, but she can’t, she doesn’t even think about it, all she thinks is her disappointment and heartbreak. 

I really do love this scene so much because I think it’s entirely in character for both of them and shows that they would have a horrible time getting to a happy ending even without Bingchang or Tantai Minglang and his corpse army. Because their particular issues just are designed to hit the other in the worst way. Whenever he does anything that looks in the least suspicious or not perfect, the reason she jumps to the worst conclusions is because she starts seeing in him the monster who set the world on fire and killed her father and sect in front of her eyes, and then almost killed her. It is easy for us, the viewers, to look at poor meow meow Tantai Jin and go “but don’t you see he’s OK, woman, he’s just an abuse victim and xianxia non-neurotypical.” But she SAW him murder everyone in sight, she saw it with her own eyes. The fact that she’s been able to look past that and see him as his own person and not yet that devil, and even further to fall in love with him is huge but this trauma, this knowledge is always in the back of her head and that is why I cut her immense amounts of slack whenever she jumps to the worst possible conclusions. I mean, here she literally starts seeing the devil god as she looks at him. She has her own horrible trauma, even if it’s different from TTJ’s.

But the reason this is such a terrible combination is that her issues hit his square dead center. Because his greatest fear AND his default expectation is that he is a monster, he is unloveable, nobody can truly love him if they know him, nobody can choose him over a $2 bill let alone the world, nobody will believe him or trust him or take his side. And so the moment she flinches, the moment she distrusts, he does not jump to tell her the truth about that awful night (where he was fully justified in what he did and more merciful than 98% of people would have been) but instead revels in showing her “yes, I am a monster, I am the worst, I am everything you fear and loathe, of course you can’t love me” because he wants to shove away before he gets shoved away first, he does not expect anyone to believe him if he tells the truth and if he shows his vulnerability, he will not get consolation but another stab in the back. Basically, both of them need him to be perfect and perfectly good - she needs him to be so and he needs her to believe him so, for that to be a workable relationship, but it cannot be such. Even paragon Xiao Lin is not perfect, let alone how could Tantai Jin be?

If she just asked him “but why” or said “I know you must have had a reason,” the train would not derail. But for once, I genuinely get why the heroine always jumps to conclusions. And so he, hurt but her lack of trust decides to show her he is as bad as she fears, even worse. In a way, it’s like an animal who tries to make itself as fearsome as it can to drive away predators. Only the predator here is emotional and what he is trying to protect is his heart. Their different traumatic experiences make them incompatible.

Oooof! You know, I normally would wonder why she doesn’t learn since this is not the first time she jumped to conclusions wrongly. But she is so damaged by seeing the devil god rampage in the future, by believing it’s inevitable (she tries to change but she never believes she can, not really), that she walks into the same mess over and over and it is actually realistic.

He so hopes she will say yes. He does not expect it, but he really wishes.

That is what he thinks of himself, isn’t it? Because it’s been drummed into him his whole life.

Susu needs to learn the future is not immutable. She is here actually because she believes that - to change the future. But that also means people’s characters in the future are not immutable either! She needs to take that next step.

He does jump on that, he really is smart.

Oh, Susu!

He says that because at this moment he’s so hurt he wishes it were true but alas his heart is pretty damn human by now and the opposite is true.

Their problem is not some other chick or crazy half brother raising a zombie army or even tragic destiroy of TTJ. Their problem is that they love each other immensely and trust each other zero.

[my-drama-heart2406]

Warning: A long Rant

Okay, so I've spent the whole span of AoS season 2 seeing people criticize Jang Uk for not recognising Naksu.

And I can't take it anymore.

Yes it is a bit of a lazy writing on the writers part. But this is not wrong in any way. See the biggest mistake they did was show us Jang Uk 3 yrs later, but there's just one flashback scene. ONLY ONE. We don't see him building into a dark character. That was definitely lazy writing.

But have you gone through a dark patch in your life? It takes so much away from you. It makes your mind foggy. It hampers with your thinking. You behave weirdly. So much so that people around you tell you're not you anymore. Which just adds on to the misery.

Which is exactly what happened to Jang Uk. He died guys. Protecting the woman he loved. But he came back alive. And he couldn't save her. And then he finds out that in some f**ked up way he's responsible for her death!

The 1st season was very clearly showed how smart Jang Uk was. Witty, edgy, sharp, spontaneous. A genius. He had to be. He had been judged and humiliated all his life, left with not even a speck of power. His wit was all he had.

He had read, understood and memorized books far over his level.

He had recognised Naksu by looking at the blue marks in her eyes and the way she held the crab leg to his neck.

Remember he copied Heo Yeom's breathing technique even when he knew nothing about energy usage.

He had figured out they were trapped in the ice stone and was already finding solutions even before Mudeok mentioned it. He was also the one who came up with the solution.

When Naksu stabbed him, before the pain the surprise registers. You can actually see the wheels turning in his head. Which is why he pulls her in. He knows she didn't do it. Even to the very end he was the smartest. Jin Mu managed to fool the entire kingdom, but not him.

So what changed?

Do you remember that flashback scene. It was sometime after he'd come back to life. And in that short span of time he'd completely figured out that she was not responsible for those crimes and who were. Till that moment Jang Uk was still sharp.

But Park Jin telling him he's responsible for her death is the point of no return. You see in his eyes the moment he breaks apart (Lee Jae Wook deserves all the awards for this). For the first time in his life there is something, that with all his intelligence, he can't wrap his head around.

That not only could he not save the love of his life, but he was responsible for her death, and all of the misery in her life.

After that Jang Uk changes.

He doesn't see and notice things like before, because he's not like before. He's not bright and witty anymore. He considers himself dead, which is why he says he's not going to do anything. He wants to die. Do you think he's seeing things straight when he's suicidal?

We do see some semblance of the old Jang Uk when he's with his close ones. When he meets Yul and Dangu. When he's with Park Jin or Kim Doju. When Yul is sad he understands. He is genuinely happy Jin Bu-Yeon lights up the lamp.

When Park Jin asks Jang Uk who he would save between him and Kim Doju, he says Kim Doju. Which was a funny scene. But this not what season 1 Jang Uk would have said. Remember Jang Uk sacrificed his own powers to save everybody trapped in the ice stone. And when Park Jin says that he should save both, you see realisation hit his eyes. He was not given a scenario where he could only save one. He can save both, but this didn't even occur to him. Season 1 Jang Uk would have answered that he would try to save both. Or he would have answered something completely out of the box like Park Jin himself was pretty capable of saving them both, why did he need to save them.

He saves Jin Bu-Yeon only so that she can kill him. But you see he does recognise her. He looks deep into her eyes. Searching... But he doesn't find what he's looking for. Her actions confuse him. But at that point he's to scared to be hopeful. Because it's too good to be true. Which is why he outright says to Jin Bu-Yeon that she could be a replacement for Naksu since she reminded him so much of her.

But she retaliates. Everytime. She repeatedly tells him she's not that woman. That she is herself. That he should see her for who she is. Which is how he is finally able to mourn and heal. He's finally able to be happy again.

Also him finding out who she was would have made him happy and relieved that she was alive. But it wouldn't have brought him out his guilt or his darkness. He would still be haunted by events of his past. He wouldn't have been able to mourn or heal.

And you see Jang Uk come back. He's accepted the fact that sometimes his wife might remember things from his past because she has the blue jade egg. He knows that she reminds him of his lover, but that's okay, he can love again. He's made peace with his past. And just when he is happy, she leaves. Again. But this time he's not confused. He tells her that he doesn't care about her past. Or that he fell for her over some confusion. He also knows that she does like him, but also is only lying to him. But he doesn't pry. He only says that he'll wait for her.

Yes, I see the problem with him finding out about her so late. Or prolonging the amnesia plot. Because there's only 2 episodes left.

And there's your problem. Only 10 episodes. If season 2 was also 20 episodes that wouldn't be a problem. Moving at this pace is not actually wrong. But leaving only 2 episodes to solve the rest of the problems is.

If you've read this far, you do see my point. Don't you?

P.S. I knew they weren't going to let them find out before they fell in love again. I knew that they were going to find out just when they were happy again. Because for some reason Hong Sisters don't like happy couples.

[leconcombrerit]

Results so far :

Main outtake for now : Phee is apparently this fandom's babyboo angel. Ta did a very good crying scene. Let's protect Phee together.

Por takes the lead as Non's main bully and de facto leader of the friend group. His attitude doesn't help. Seriously, we haven't seen Por do anything genuinely kind so far. I think his mom doting on him and everyone licking his boots inflated his ego beyond the point of no return. His father abuses him, which leads him to try and get his own achievements (in hope of impressing him? Make the abuse stop?) ; viewers might have been more sympathetic towards this if he didn't use people (Non) to do it. He never faces consequences, so he doesn't learn anything -until he gets impaled and realizes they did something bad. Far too little far too late to keep him from the Most Hated Position.

Tee gets the second place for now, mostly for dragging Non into real, illegal trouble. He's stuck in it himself, and I take he's been shaped by his surroundings a lot. But he's still ruthless and merciless. Unlike Por and Top, he does it for a reason, sure. But he goes way further than strictly necessary, and doesn't show remorse at all. I guess that's what gets him so high in the poll. He doesn't fucking learn either.

Top gets third place. He's an ass. I don't have much to say about him except that he seems to follow Por and Tee a lot. A bit like a leech. Seriously we don't have anything on him. He could represent gratuitous cruelty, I don't know. He's easy to hate.

Last with a significative amount of votes is Jin. His actions and betrayal are very fresh in everyone's memory, I guess timing doesn't help. I still don't think Jin is a terrible person -he's very human to me. He did something horrible in a moment of hurt, didn't seem to realize that dragging Non back was bad, and probably didn't even leak the video. Jin has a conscience. Whatever happened is eating him alive, and he's the only one to feel guilty in the OG group (Fluke is debatable). All this makes him even more easy to hate, because he was that close to being fully good. Jin's worst flaw is constantly falling short of viewers' expectations, just like he fell short of saving Non when he took the pills.

Fluke, Tan and Non have a few votes too. I'm curious about whoever voted for Tan. Seriously. What has Tan done to be worse than our main contenders. Tell me please I need to understand.

And WHO voted for White. WHO READ MY TAGS AS A CHALLENGE

[armpirate]

UNDER HIS SKIN || JJK || Ch. 35

Pairings: tattoist!jk x fem!reader

Genre: smut, angst, friends to lovers, tattoo au, virgin reader.

Summary: They say there are two versions for every story, and it's important to hear both of them. Everybody is hearing your side of the story, but it's just fair to get to know his.

After breaking up with his girlfriend, the only thing he wanted was to have fun with no attachment. You wanted to get rid of your virginity, and he wanted to tick you off his list. What he didn't expect was getting so emotionally attached to you that he would regret the deal.

Previous || Next

MASTERLIST

Aprox. time of reading: 13 minutes

Chapter warnings: smut, oral sex (male receiving), non-protected sex, dirty talk

Ever since I came back to our table, I haven't been able to think about anything else that isn't that picture. Not because of the content itself, because I know Y/n would never do something behind my back, and I really doubt she'd choose Jin if she ever did, basically because of all the consequences that would come right after. It activated something that I thought I overcame when we both decided to be exclusive. The possibility of Y/n finding someone better has always been in the back of my head, because I genuinely think she could do way better than me.

A few times she interrupts my inner monologue, she tries to cheer up the mood by making some jokes or being touchy, but it only makes me disconnect from my thoughts the short seconds it lasts. 

—Is something wrong? —she asks, wrapping her arm around mine and squeezing it.

—I'm just a bit tired —I lie, after hearing her ask the same question a few more times. 

—Do you want to leave and get some rest? —she suggests, resting her chin on my shoulder—. I've already finished mine. And I'm sure it won't be a good idea for me to get another one.

When I feel the weight of her head on my shoulder, I can't help but turn to her. Her big eyes are looking at me with a shining light I'm not able to describe, but it for sure works on making me feel more relaxed. 

I nod at her question, making her move away from me so she can stand up and follow right after her.

—Tae isn't here today? —she frowns, trying to find him among the customers.

Honestly, I'm glad Tae and her get on well. At first, I was afraid he'd be too harsh on her after everything that happened with Areum and Leslie. But Y/n's personality captivated Tae instantly, and even made him protective of her sometimes.

—No, he didn't feel well. So Brooke is in charge of the place.

—I hope he feels better soon —she mutters as we head outside—. Tell him that if he needs something...

—I will —I cut her up.

The fact that Brooke, someone Tae also trusts, twisted things just to damage Y/n annoys me, but I know it'd make Tae freak out even more if he ever knew. 

While I drive her home, I feel her hands playfully rubbing my side and tummy, before she's resting her cheek back on my shoulder. Seeing no reaction from me, she just stops trying until we reach her place. 

—You aren't sleeping here? —she looks at me confused, when the engine of the motorbike is still on when she hops off.

—I'd rather go to my place tonight.

—Cut the shit, Jungkook —she crosses her arm over her chest—. What's wrong?

—I told you I'm tired.

—And I'm not buying it —she tilts her head—. You were fine tonight, and out of nowhere you started acting like...

—Like what?

—Like an ass —she rushes to answer—. If you were tired, you could've told me. And we would've gone straight to my house or your place.

—If my attitude bothered you so much, you could've called Jin so he could keep you better company.

Those words leave my lips before I'm able to realize it. Something so insignificant as that picture, got me overreacting and losing control of my own tongue.

Y/n just looks away, pressing her lips together before her eyes are back on me. Sweetness is long gone, and now she's the one who's annoyed here. 

—Why are you bringing up Jin?

—You tell me —I turn off the engine to hear her better—. Why did I have to learn from someone else that you and Jin went out for drinks, and were all over each other?

—All over each other? You have to be kidding me.

She just scoffs, her eyes going blank as she throws her head back and looks at me again with both hands hanging on her hips. 

—He's my fucking boss. He invited me for drinks, because he couldn't do it on my first day —she tries to explain—. He knows we're seeing each other. For fucks sake, the day after, you came to pick me up and he saw us being all over each other.

—And that's why you didn't tell me? —I insist— You told me you'd get home late, and that's why I didn't go to pick you up.

—I didn't tell you because I didn't think it was important —she squints her eyes at me—. I went for a drink with my boss. He himself made things clear when I asked him, so I don't know where this is coming from.

She doesn't say much more, she just waits for me to answer back. But I really don't know what I should answer back right now. And it seems like my silence annoys her even more. 

—It's unbelievable you're the one trying to be offended over me hiding things though —she continues—. Maybe you're being an asshole because Jimin can't tell you what to do right now. Right? —she crosses her arms over her chest— Maybe he'd tell you to man up and bring some sense to that tiny brain of yours.

The fact that she knows about that little thing, and what a dickhead I was because I talked about something that involved her with someone else, and took their advice instead of just accepting what she wanted, makes me aware that she has pretty more reasons to be annoyed at me than I do. 

—I've dealt with your big walls constantly, with your stupid ideas, and even how you don't even want to consider us as a couple. And you really think I'd run after someone else after how much it took us to get here? —her voice trembles as she speaks—. You could've talked to me about it, because I know you would've gone home without saying a single thing about it if I hadn't insisted. You should discuss everything with me.

Everything that was crossing my mind, everything that could've made me distrust her in the slightest, completely disappears when her voice cracks towards the end of the sentence. I allowed my insecurities to get the best of me, and blind me into thinking she'd ever be able to hurt me while being aware of the pain she could put me through.

—I'm sorry —I say, getting her to look at me—. When Brooke told me and showed me the pic, I don't know...

—I don't know either —she crosses her arms over her chest—. It wouldn't cross my mind to do something like that to you.

—I'm sorry —I apologize again, hopping off the motorbike to feel somewhat closer to her.

—If you are sorry, then I really hope you park that damned motorbike and bring your ass up to my place —trying her best to hide her smile, she tilts her head.

—That's it?

—What? —she steps back— Were you expecting me to throw a tantrum and go two weeks without talking to you? —her eyebrow raises with that last comment— I could do that, but I don't want to. I just need you to understand that I'm only into you. And next time something like this happens, you talk to me first —she starts walking, but she suddenly stops again—. I'm not bringing up the whole deal issue because we made up a few days ago, but I hope something like that doesn't ever happen again —she warns me, lifting her index in my direction. 

Trying not to show off my smile, so she doesn't regret her words, I press my lips together and nod. 

Honestly, it feels weird that we both made it out so quickly and so easily. Not like we've gone too long without talking with each other, and the few times were because of a serious issue -at least more than this-, but I still can't believe everything's been solved so fast.

As I sit on the couch, I see her moving uneasy in front of me, puckering her lips, until she finally speaks again. 

—I really can't believe you still think I could look at anyone else the way I look at you —she straddles me, and the way she feels against me will make me go insane—. Maybe I should use actions, because words don't stay long enough up here —she rubs my temple with her index as she says it. 

—How will you do that?

Her fingertip runs over my skin, digging behind my ear into my hair, as she bends over me to link our lips together. One hand holding my head and playing with my hair, while the other travels down my neck and chest. Her touch makes me feel so needy, I see no point in holding back before I sink my tongue in her mouth.  

Not ready for her to move yet, I keep her tight against me, enjoying the taste of our saliva mixing together while our tongues just twirl against one another. And it only gets messier when I feel her pressing her core against me. I unzip her jeans, making them baggy enough around her waist so I can sneak my hands through them, cupping her ass tight. 

She bites my lip before she breaks the kiss, pulling it in between her teeth with her eyes fixed on mine. She seems so dangerous while she does it. But I don't care, I want -and need- more. I move my hands back to her back, holding her tight. Although she's still able to move, I made sure of that after I saw her intentions taking over her eyes.

She kneels slowly in between my legs, moving her hands over my thighs until she almost reaches the noticeable bulge under my pants, and that's screaming for attention at this point. I let out a heavy breath, a feeling all my muscles tense under her touch the closer she gets to my crotch. She unzips my pants. And while I keep my hands in the air -trying to allow her to have as much control as she wants over me-, she finally takes them off, along with my boxers. 

My hard cock jumps free as soon as she slides the fabric down, and I'm sure I won't last too much if she keeps looking at it as if it was something she had been waiting for forever.

She licks my shaft, from the base to the tip, and I'm only able to sigh when the warmth of her tongue traces one of my marked veins until she reaches my most sensitive part. Her fingers wrap around it, letting her tongue tease me. She moves it in circles around the tip,cleaning the precum that keeps leaking. 

Not enough with the feeling, I move her hair away, wanting to get the perfect image of how she looks while she drives me crazy. 

—Suck it, baby —I ask, rubbing her cheek with my thumb. 

As she bends over again, my hand goes back to the back of her head, taking all the locks I can away from her face. 

She wraps her lips around my tip, covering her teeth with them -feeling my heart pounding with pride when I remember I was the one who taught her that-, before she starts going down on me. She bumps her head up and down slowly, having me lifting my hips in the air so her mouth could never leave me. 

—Keep your eyes on me, babe —I command, trying to get her eyes back on me as I notice her closing them.

But maybe it’s the biggest mistake I could've made. 

She looks up to me, big eyes digging for any hint of pleasure on my face, while her lips are wrapped around me tight. Not only is it the way she looks, but how she makes my cock vibrate when she whimpers on it. And I can tell by the way her body tenses, she wants attention just as much as I did. 

—So fucking good —I praise her again—. Sucking it like I taught you, like a good girl.

And that praise must've awakened something in her, because she pumps my cock with her fist, making sure her movements were in sync with the ones in her hand. I can feel my cock twitching with every move she makes, and I'm reaching that point where I'm not able to control my body as I'm too hooked on the shivering.

—I'm gonna cum, baby. Stop —I warn her.

I made her move back. And, after only giving her a few seconds to recover, I cup her face in my hands. 

—Come here.

While we kiss, I do my best at taking her clothes off. First moving her pants away and sliding them down her legs along with her panties. And like I'm attracted to it, my palm covers her slit, fingers digging to know how wet and ready she is for me, at least until she's back at straddling me. 

I'm so desperate for her, that I don't even care about the ripping sound her blouse makes as I tear it apart. I see her lifting her hips, and I help her by holding myself up, aiming to her entrance. A united, and harmonious gasp, leaves our lips as she sinks me deeper in her slowly. Her walls wrap around me tight, taking me in so easily, yet molding around me so well, that I doubt I'll make it for too long. 

She jumps slowly at first, helping us both get used to each other, lifting and lowering her hips, taking me back in when I thought she'd be letting me go completely. Her hips increase the speed slowly, making the clapping sounds of our bodies louder with every jump. 

—You're the only one I want to fuck like this —she moans, one hand on my shoulder and the other on the backrest of her couch—. Do you understand it like this?

—Fuck, yes —my voice cracks in the middle of the sentence—. You're only mine.

—Uh-huh.

I pull her in for a kiss, as I lower my body on the couch, dragging her along with me. Taking control away from her, I hold her hips up and start drilling into her in a speed that soon has her moaning louder, while her pussy clenches around me tight. I lower the cups of her bra, sucking and biting her hard nipple as I fuck her like I've never done before. Fucking her like I'm sorry for being such a dumbass today. 

—I'm close —she holds onto my wrist as she says that

—Cum with me —I move even faster.

Her pussy clenches around me again, before her body collapses over mine with a loud moan that has my ears whistling for a while. Although all of it only makes tingles run over me, from the tip of my toes to the top of my head, before I cum in her. 

—We didn't use protection —she panics, suddenly looking at me.

—It's alright —I move under her, trying to get back to the initial position—. I'm clean. And we can buy the morning after pill tomorrow.

I kiss her again, slow and sweet, enjoying every bit of her right now. 

✸ ✸ ✸

A placid smile adorns her face while she closes her eyes, trying to recover from her high, when I fall next to her on the bed, still not able to believe that all of this is real. Turning to me, she starts moving some stamped locks from my forehead, although I use that soft gesture to pull her from her wrist and make her wrap her arm around me so I can feel her closer. 

While I look her in the eyes, and how they look at me as if I were the only person in the world for her, I instantly remember how I made her feel bad just a few hours ago. 

—I'm sorry about tonight —I apologize again—. You didn't deserve to be treated that way in the pub.

—Kook, we already talked it out.

—We didn't. I apologized and you let it go —I stop her, before she tries to move on from it again—. I should've thought better of you, but I was so blinded by the idea of you being into someone else... I'm just scared of losing you, losing this, being played with again. I know you wouldn't do that, but I can't help but be prepared for it.

As I speak, and I let all my insecurities drop with each one of my words, I feel the knot in my throat tightening. Not even her fingers playing with my hair can make me feel better right now. 

—I'm not going anywhere, Kook —she assures me—. Not now, not tomorrow. So get that idea clear in your head.

It's all about the honesty in her words, and how she makes sure I understand each one of them while looking deep into my eyes. I want to speak, tell her everything that's going on in my head when it comes to her, but I know I won't be able to say a word without accidentally sobbing. When I cover my face, as soon as I feel my lips trembling, she simply pulls me in for a hug.

—I thought you wanted me to say cute things to you —she teases me. 

I giggle on her chest, hiding my face from her, before I move back again, just to look at her. It's right then, when she weeps some of my tears away and rubs my cheeks ever so gently, that I know what all those mixed thoughts mean, and how I could express them perfectly in just one sentence. 

—I think I'm in love with you, cocktease.

When she stops, and looks at me intensely, I know she's not ready to say those words back yet. But I didn't say it because I wanted to hear the words back, I just said them because I wanted to let her know everything she causes in me. 

[bcdluckstumblcd]

some !! random Elsa and Jin stuff cause @variantia got me thinking

Not really relevant to anything but IN the event of a zombie apocalypse or something of the sort and IF he were to be in a situation where it was him and Elsa, he's obviously going to be super protective and careful and make sure she's rested and safe and gets her share of food first and he's absolutely jumping into danger for her and IF he gets bit or hurt on the way it's FINE, he's always been tough, he'll be okay. He won't tell her because he doesn't want to worry her if it's not that serious! But he's going to be a bit more distanced just in case.

Jin surviving and being saved by Elsa and knowing she's genuinely trying but WHEW yike seeing her be close and friendly and defense of Hawks!! Next time he saw her after that he'd just be so cold but like also !! He'd just blame himself more like Oops here he goes TRUSTING people again wtfff

Him in the rehabilitation au when Elsa gives him a job at her agency!!?? Oh he is employee of the MONTH, of the YEAR. He is on his BEST behavior!! He is volunteering for any assignments he's allowed to take and really does his best to be a type of hero HE needed and he absolutely expresses that to Elsa like, he def sits down and expresses how grateful he is to her and that he hopes he can be useful on her team and not a waste of an oppertunity (cause it's one of the first times besides the League when someone took a chance on him and trusted him

!! Villain Elsa's verse just Jin opening up to Elsa about losing HIS little sister hoping it'll be like a bonding thing like depending on how much he knows and how much Elsa tells him he'd be like "i get it, i lost family too and it felt like my fault because i couldn't do anything to save them." like he wasn't a child himself and he's showing Elsa so much kindness and care because he can tell she needs someone gentle and that loves and accepts her just like HE needed and honestly his favorite hang outs are when it's him and Elsa and Toga watching movies or something.

psssst Jin absolutely picking up/learning some Norwegian and asking her for help when he gets stuck on a word/phrase!!

Still thinking about the second one because she would have to work SO HARD to get on her get to even acknowledge her genuinely like whew that's on the brink of "eveyone treats me like a villain so much maybe I might as well play the part huh? Cause HAWKS REALLY?! Him being like yeah all heroes must be trash, of course you'd defend your own even though he admitted to trying to kill me and betrayed me and my family." Oh he'd be so heated and hurt

[not7wu]

Chapter Six: A Symbiotic Relationship

Recap: You might have remembered why you woke up naked in Jin's bed...but the hope you had to explore something more came to a screeching halt when you learned about Rule Five and Jin's first love. Jieun instead encouraged you to spend less time on Kim Cho-hee and more time with your family of eight, so you do just that. Oh, and you have a cleaning lady, apparently.

Tae is waiting for you with a corsage outside of your apartment.  Both dressed casually and comfy, the corsage brings a note of whimsy so uniquely Tae that honestly you should have expected it.  Wrist now decorated with periwinkle, thistles, and eucalyptus, you walk hand in hand to the parking garage.  

When you tried solidifying plans with Tae earlier in the day, he said he wanted to surprise you, so you happily settle in and enjoy conversation with him as his driver navigates the streets of Seoul.  There’s a mischievous twinkle in Tae’s eye when you pull up into an alley.  You’re led through a backdoor, through the kitchen, and down a staff hallway to a secluded, closed dining room.  The table is set low with seating cushions.  The wood accents from the trim to the table are rustic with blackened knots and scars.  It’s beautiful and you wonder if Namjoon has been here before.  Your server enters with water and menus and you finally find out where you are.  

Ossu Seiromushi, Jin’s brother’s restaurant.  You peek over the menu at Tae who is staring back at you unabashedly.  You don’t know what he’s planning, but you can’t do anything but go along with it, completely at his mercy.  After your order is put in and your juices placed in front of you, the silence stretches, but it’s different than what you’re used to–the comfortable silences, the anxious silences and the silences that are too loud.  This silence feels buzzy and slinky, like an animal crouched, waiting to pounce.  The Tae sitting in front of you is the same Tae, but he seems different from the persona he normally projects like he has decided to set aside his hahoetal mask for a short time.

“Hello,” you murmur.

“Hi.”  He seems to take the measure of you, stripping you of your own mask that you hadn't realized you had on. Though it's not like he's ripping off this protection you made for yourself, but more like he's letting you breathe unhindered for a while. 

You clear your throat. “How are you?”

He settles into the cushions to consider, leaning back on his arms in a calculated way to seem casual.  You know he's trying to allay your anxiety, but you're actually okay.  Everyone says he's your first friend, one of the ones closest to you, if friendships were to have levels, and even with this given fact, you've never felt deceit from Tae. All of his emotions and reactions have been genuinely and sincerely broadcasted to you.  You trust Tae.   

“Today, I’m content.  It’s a rollercoaster otherwise,” he shrugs.

“Why is that?”

His smile turns half-hearted.  “Our Map of the Soul Tour got canceled.  That sucks.  And you'd think we would have more time to take breaks and see family, but our schedule is still going at the same pace we usually do, if not more, to make it up to Army.”

The pandemic has been difficult for many people.  Even you know that the reason you rarely venture outside their condo isn't entirely to isolate and guard you, but because the world is on edge with these social distancing regulations.  But social distancing for a performance group like BTS, whose relationship with fans is more intimate than most fandoms, must be agony.  “I’m sorry.  I know you were all really looking forward to the tour.”

“Yeah, concerts are the endgame prize for all our hard work and it got snatched away.  We can’t even blame anyone.  So I guess our schedule is a double edged sword to protect and distract us from depression.  Idle idols are not a good thing.  On the other hand, the Tour being canceled wasn’t all that bad either.”

“Because…”

“Because it means we can stay home and spend more time with you.”

“What?”  That was an unexpected turn.  The boys love performing.  It’s the only time they can see the people they’ve inspired to move to the beat, to live life to the fullest, and to dream quietly or loudly.  And Army is like a mirror in that way, inspiring the boys to make the beats, to breathe life in verse, and to accomplish their dreams.  You suddenly feel like an obstacle and it doesn’t sit right with you.  

Tae chews on his lip for a few seconds, assessing your stricken expression, your face an open book.  "Can you handle some heavy conversation? Or do you wanna put a pin in it and we can come back to it when you have the emotional energy for it?"

You want to blurt out that you can handle it, but you respect him for considering your well-being, so you instead take a moment to actually gauge yourself.  Your mind is calm, your emotions are stable, and you feel safe here with Tae.  Confidently, you say, "I can handle it."

His expression is grave, but there's some pride there too, like he's proud you weren't carelessly eager.

He wets his lips, his next words deliberate and conscientious.  “Your attack happened near the beginning of 2018.  We were already burnt out.  We hadn’t seen our families properly in over a year, and then you got hurt.  It felt wrong to leave for the Love Yourself Tour while you were still in the hospital, confused and disoriented.  And the hits just kept coming.  Jungkook’s foot injury.  Jimin’s issues with his muscles and overworked voice.  We became submerged in a blue and grey fog, but that wasn't fair to Army, so we used Army as our focal point.  The guiding constellation until we could be home again.

"But I still felt out of focus, like double vision.  I was giving it my all, but my angel's voice would be drowned out in cresting and ebbing waves of this other voice whispering things like 'Y/N doesn't know who you are.  She doesn't recognize anyone and you abandoned her.  She doesn't have anyone else and she's scared and sad and panicked.  And you left her.  You left her line of sight.'

"And I worried.  Worried that the people we left behind to care for you wouldn't know how best to quiet your brain, how best to cheer you up, how best to distract you.  And as all these worries piled up, I realized I needed you to quiet my brain, cheer me up, and distract me, but you couldn't.  I couldn't call you for encouragement or comfort.  Like a snake biting its own tail I just went round and round in the guilt and depression.  And it wasn't just me.  Jin-hyung, Hobi-hyung–we wanted to leave.  Not just the Tour but everything."

Tae was right to ask if you could handle this.  It's a lot to take in.  You're trying your best to listen, to process, because this moment is for Tae.  He's been holding all of this in and steadily marching on for you.  So you anchor yourself, determined to hold his ship steady.  

You prompt him, "But you didn't leave."

He plays around with the condensation on his water glass.  "No. We didn't leave.  Yoongi-hyung convinced us to stay."

“How did he do that?”

“Eh.  He said that we had more power now to advocate for ourselves in contract negotiations and more means to delegate.  But the ultimate selling point was when he said you would kill us if we left," he chuckles here, melancholy lacing the velvet of it.  "He said you wouldn’t want us to break up.”

“I wouldn’t.”

“Yeah, Yoongi-hyung tattled on us to you during one of your 'lucid' moments and you really laid into us.”

“Good.”  

Tae rolls his eyes at your satisfaction, but he shares your grin.  He leans in almost conspiratorially.

“You know, you’re the reason why I’m even in BTS.”

“Bullshit.  You’re in BTS because of you.”

He laughs, shaking his head.  “No, seriously.  I’m here because Park Haneul asked you to go with him to an audition, but you couldn’t ask off work.  So, you forced me to go with him instead.  It’s funny cuz’ you were oblivious that he was trying to ask you out and then I passed the audition.  Actually, now that I think about it, that super sucked for him.”

You giggle, “Oh, shit, that’s horrible.  Is it too late to send him an apology gift basket?”

“Eh, I don’t know if that would help or just rub him the wrong way.”

“You’re probably right," you concede.  "Still, even if I got you to the audition, you did all the hard work.”

“Oh, Y/N.  What people don’t tell you in this business is that you can work as hard as you want, but it all ultimately comes down to luck.  I was lucky.  We were lucky.  Now we’re racing towards a ceiling and we can’t predict when it’ll all come crashing down.”

The humor subsides, Tae looking the youngest you've ever seen him, troubled and vulnerable.  You’d do anything to erase that expression forever, but you don’t think you have the power to.  You want to try though.  

“Tae.  It might hurt when you reach the end, but you’ve got parachutes.  You’ve got people like me who are more than ready to catch you.  You say it's all luck, but we are lucky to have you.  Trust that we've got you.  And, it’s all ultimately out of your control, so let’s just enjoy the ride.”

“Advice you could take too, you know.”

You flinch, his words stinging a bit.  “You’re right,” you admit.  “That was a bit careless.  I didn’t mean to dismiss your feelings.  I just meant that I’m here for you, no matter what state I’m in.  And I know you’re here for me too, that all of you are.  I’ve never once felt neglected or abandoned.   If anything, I would understand if you guys put me up in some hospital and went on with your lives.  Seriously, you’ve gone above and beyond what any normal person would do for a friend.”

“Family, Y/N.  You’re family.”

“Yes.  Above and beyond what any normal person would do for family, then.”

“Well, you should know by now we aren’t normal.   I adopted you when I was just a scrawny kid with ears too big for my head and you were just a bookworm who stubbornly refused to get glasses.”

“I don’t know why you’re so dead set against glasses.  But fine.  Let’s ask seonsaeng-nim to move you to a desk in the front,” Tae suggests.  He’s sitting on your desk before class starts, drawing abstract cartoons on the desktop.  There’s a little alien character saying ‘Fighting!  You can do it!’  You’re gonna have to erase it before the test, but it’s still nice to have this reminder and encouragement beforehand.  In turn, he’s making you draw cartoons on his shoes with markers.  You decided to go with a plant theme and he giggles when you add sunglasses to a cactus.

“If I move, we wouldn’t be sitting next to each other, Tae. ”

“Aww, you love me," he coos at you.

You huff.  “We have a symbiotic relationship at best.”

“So you’re saying I’m a clownfish and you’re my sea anemone.”

“Yeah, Tae, you’re a clown.”

“So zappy.  Nice.”  You stick your tongue out at him and he sticks his tongue out at you, crossing his eyes.  It inspires you to draw googily eyes on a sunflower, earning you an approving pat on the head that you bat away.  “Well, just cuz we don’t sit next to each other doesn’t mean we won’t see each other.  We can make it fun!  Passing notes is not a challenge when you’re literally sitting right next to me.”

“So you’re saying you don’t want to sit next to me.”  You mean to say it as a joke, but a tinge of hurt manages to bleed through.  He’s been pushing this idea for the past couple of days, ever since you mentioned your nearsightedness.  Now, you wish you hadn't.  

You know he means well, but it’s hard for you to make friends.  Well, it’s not like you don’t have other friends.  You could end up sitting next to Hanuel or Bora and it’d be fine.  But they’re not Tae.  And you’re the only one who can help him concentrate during lessons.  As you’re thinking that though, you fight off the knowledge that, ultimately, Tae would be fine without you.  Yes, Tae is your person, but Tae is so friendly and charismatic, he doesn’t need to stick with you.  

Tae gets up with no warning, making you accidentally draw a red line through a sunflower, as well as getting a bit of ink on his khakis.  Whoops.  He doesn’t care though, draping himself over you and almost strangling you in the process.  

Some classmates think that you’re together when it couldn’t be farther from the truth.  Many of them are beginning to be interested in things like kissing and sex, so they find your physical closeness suspect, but Tae has confided in you that while he doesn’t think he’d mind kissing, the idea of sex makes him nauseous, makes something wriggle and itch under his skin, so he isn’t interested, nope, no way.  You, on the other hand, aren’t interested in kissing and sex because you’re barely comfortable with hugs.

You remember the first time Tae hugged you.  This boy plopped himself next to you during lunch and proclaimed he was adopting you.  You were particularly sensitive that day being in a new school alone, afraid people would notice that your secondhand uniform (or rather fourthhand) was frayed.  That people would notice no one had dropped you off or would pick you up.  Afraid they’d know you’re an orphan, something abandoned and not worthy of nice things like friendship.  

Orphanages are survival of the fittest.  You only get adopted if you are young and pretty or cute or handsome or charming.  You know you aren't ugly.  Objectively, you think you look generic.  Cookie cutter.  Not only that, you know you aren't charming.  And while your facility tries to be fair and equal, there isn’t always enough to go around, so you often are skipped over for things like new clothes, toys, and treats and get smaller portions of meals, the caretakers citing your apparent 'independence' and 'maturity.'  

But your independence is not voluntary.  It's loneliness.  You are not mature.  You are resigned.  And here was a boy who had already guessed all this, smelled it on you, and was making fun of you for it.  The little hope you had for something different, for something completely your own, died.

You burst into tears and the boy panicked, stumbling over an apology and eyes wildly searching for help before he dove at you, squeezing.  You immediately froze, unused to skinship, arms awkwardly hanging by your sides unsure what to do with them or where you should place your hands.  No one had ever hugged you or held your hand.  None of the caretakers ever tucked you in bed or comforted you after nightmares.  

Like a plant, you wanted to soak it all up like water.  Like sunlight.  You didn’t know how you could prolong it, how to keep this or even if you were allowed to.  So, you froze because maybe if you didn’t move, if you held your breath, this boy wouldn't let go.  

He did eventually let go, but he stayed.  He didn’t ask you questions, but he patiently waited for you to reveal parts of yourself until days, weeks, months went by and you realized he could see all of you.  The world didn’t end and he continued to stay.  He saw your insecurities and he built your confidence with attentive prodding and careful wheedling, drawing you into seemingly innocent arguments and discussions that emphasized the double standards you set for yourself.  He saw how anxious you are and he listened to music with you, introducing you to jazz, trap,  emo-rock and a healthy coping mechanism. He saw how touch starved you are and he hugged, cuddled and held your hand, wearing down your awkward hesitancy with exposure therapy.  Now you grab his forearm and squeeze.  He returns your squeeze bodily, the weight of him grounding you.  

“I’ll always be next to you,” Tae says.  “You can’t get rid of me.  You’re my sea anemone, remember?  I just won’t be in your direct line of sight is all.”

“Well, I’d still rather see you than the board.”

“Aww, you do love me.”  You duck your head, but can’t fight the smile.  His declarations of love are apparently also part of his exposure therapy.  No one has ever said they love you, except Tae.  You only ever read about it in books, books with passionate romance, covenants of friendship, and embers in the hearth of home.  And you think you feel love for Tae too because his love feels like home.  

Tae laughs and ruffles your hair.  You huff in feigned annoyance, shrugging him off and smoothing out your hair.  He moves back to his desk, reaching to ruffle your hair again and you bat his hand away.  “Okay, so if you don’t want to move to the front then you could, I don’t know, get glasses?  You know, those things people wear so they can see?  Come on.  You can get the round ones like Harry Potter!  It’ll be magical!”

“Tae, for the last time, glasses are expensive and–they won’t turn me into a wizard,” you say breathlessly.  Your eyes refocus on the present moment and the first thing you see is Tae stunned, eyes wide.

You remember him as he was in your youth and you now see this beautiful man.  He really has grown into his ears.  The freckles on his nose, cheek and lip are more prominent now from so many days in the sun.  His eyes, though, still hold the same child-like wonder you’ve always admired.  His face lights with that boxy smile, the one that holds so much joy his face can barely contain it.

“Aww, you love me,” he teases.  His expression and tone is playful, but there’s a sincerity, a gravity, a note of bittersweet, a whisper of a question at the end.  His words don’t encompass like a blanket or taste like strawberries.  They don’t weigh you like an anchor or light you up like a firework.  The words flow through you like a river, the surface running free, vibrant and frolicking, but with depths that cut paths in unexpected ways.  A path that connects you to him.  So you have no hesitation, no doubt when you say, “I do.  I love you, Tae.”

He beams and you can’t help grinning back.  You stick your tongue out at him for old time’s sake, but instead of returning the sentiment, his smile softens.  “You know, that’s all we’ve ever needed.  I’m in your corner and you’re in my corner.  As long as we have this, then nothing else matters."

“You’re right," you nod.  "I just–I just want to remember more.  It’s like I have all these pieces to a puzzle, but I’ve lost the box, and every time I remember, I finally get a glimpse at the picture of what I’m supposed to make.  Our experiences and memories make us who we are, Tae.  I wanna complete my puzzle so I can start living my life, you know?”

“But you are living your life.  No one’s puzzle is complete anyways.  It’s constantly changing.  We’re different from when we were twelve and we’re different than we were yesterday.  So even with all that’s going on, you are allowed to be different and to change.  We can make new memories.  Have new experiences.”

“Still.  Those memories are precious.  I don’t wanna throw away the box completely.”

“Then I’ll remember for you.  You can take or borrow any piece you want.”

“What if I stray too far from the original design until I’m too different for you to handle?”

His eyes issue a challenge.  “I can handle it.”

You believe that.  You do.  It’s just–

“Plus,” Tae continues.  He cocks his head at you.  “No matter how many times you’ve reset, you’re still the same at your core, even if you can’t see it.  You’re resilient and kind.  Anxious in yourself, but fierce for others.  And you still baby me.  

"You know, I’m the oldest hyung in my family.  I always take care of my brother and sister and all of my cousins.  I’m expected to be the rock of my family, and in a way, I guess I succeeded.  I worked hard to be where I am so my siblings can do whatever they want.  But you were the first person to let me be me without any expectations.  You let me be silly and strange.  You follow my whims and encourage my weird.

“And if you hadn’t, I don’t know if I could have made it with the hyungs.  I’m a hyung to Jungkookie, but without you, I wouldn’t know how to be a dongsaeng to the hyungs.  To be soft so they can be hard.  To let go of control so they can be in control.  You gave me time to figure it out.  So you can be you without any expectations.  You’ve always taken the reins so I can daydream.  This is your daydream now and I can take the reins.”

You’re deeply touched, and you get it.  Just as you see the twelve year old him still buried in the man he is today, in the way he smiles, the dare in his eyes, he’s still just your Tae.  But you lightly scoff.  “Thank you for taking care of me, but you don’t fool me, Tae.  You still act like an oppa, like a hyung.  You take care of everyone in your wily ways.  You really are our dramatic alien, but I also know that you turn it on, on purpose, for BTS to give them energy.  I know you turn it on, on purpose, at home so everyone can turn off and get comfortable.  I know you turn it on, on purpose, to bring out the oppas’ instincts.  I know you turn it on, on purpose, so Namjoon-oppa, Jimin, and Jungkookie can be silly dongsaengs with you.  You are my silly dongsaeng, but you are also my oppa, Tae.”

“Just let me take the reins, noona.”

You watch the switch happen.  This conversation has been much too serious for far too long and, being called out for his ways, Tae retreats now, putting his hahoetal mask back on with that grin, his eyes twinkling in the way they do, impish and goofy, but wiser than anyone suspects.  The perfect disguise for the enigma that is Kim Taehyung.    And just because you know it’ll please him, you tell him, “You’re an enigma, Kim Taehyung.”

He pumps his fists in victory.  “Yes!  That’s all I’ve ever wanted!  Wait!  Does that mean I’ve peaked?!  I’m too young to peak!”

You’re so fond of this man as he rambles on a mile a minute.  The boy who adopted an anxious girl and a girl who was chosen by a fearless boy.  A Tom Sawyer who wanted you to be his Huckleberry Finn.  You know you fall short, but he’s always had enough Tom and Huck in himself that he never cares that you don’t.  That’s why you will always play along wholeheartedly.

You scoff.  “Oh, please.  I have no doubt you’ll always find a way to top yourself.”

“Ooh, kinky.  That’s what they call self-cest, right?”

“Oh, my god, Tae, are you reading fanfics?!”

“If Army didn’t want me to read their dream journals, they shouldn’t post it online.”

“But you’re asexual.”

“There are some asexual fanfics.”

“Then how do you know about self-cest?”

“Trial and error.  Lots of error.  Sometimes I can’t help myself, okay?”

You both laugh because if that isn’t Tae’s motto, you don’t know what is.  

The rest of dinner goes much like that, tangents you can’t fathom how you found yourself on, but filled with humor nonetheless.  By the end, you feel more settled than you’ve ever felt.  Maybe Tae’s right.  Maybe you can let him take the reins and just be the person you are right now.  Figure it out as you go along.

The both of you are waiting for the bill and you’re trying your best to reenact Jieun getting caught by Bang PD-nim doing an impression of him rapping, Tae giggling manically, when a man you don’t recognize enters.  

“Jung-hyung!” Tae shouts.  He tackles the man as you smooth your hair down, hoping this guy didn’t catch the last bit of your reenactment of Bang PD-nim flailing because when he sat down in Jieun’s chair, it was too tall, so he pulled the lever to lower it and it shot down too fast.

The man pulls back from the hug and says, “I saw ‘Vante’ on the reservation list and had to come say hi.  You know that pseudonym doesn’t fool anyone, right?”

“Yeah, I should have used Y/N’s name cuz’ she’s not as famous at all,” Tae says, pointing his thumb at you.

You sigh, but don’t take any offense to his teasing because you’re honestly grateful you’re not famous.  You don’t know what you would have done if your privacy was invaded on top of all your other issues.  You politely bow to the man and his lips quirk in amusement.  “Y/N,” he says, startling you.  “It’s been a while.  I hope the dongsaengs have been behaving themselves.”

“You hope for too much,” you say with a straightface, earning you chuckle.  Apparently, you have some sort of relationship with this man?  You try to silently communicate your need for assistance to Tae, but he’s paying you no mind, too busy climbing the man like a tree.  You don’t have to worry though because he receives your telepathy.

“Noona, Seokjung-hyung is Jin-hyung’s hyung.”

Realization dawns, Seokjung remembering that you might not remember him and you remembering that you’re at Jin’s brother’s restaurant, so this really shouldn’t surprise you.  

“Aish!” Seokjung exclaims.  “I’m so sorry, I forgot. I’m your Jungie-oppa.  I give Jin shit.  You give Jin shit.  We’re the give Jin shit team.”

You like the sound of that.  You can see a slight resemblance now, except he’s taller and has broader features than Jin.  His easy going nature immediately sets you at ease.  The charm must be genetic.

“All you need to remember is that I’m your favorite oppa,” he says with a very Jin-like wink.

“It’s just me here,” Tae says.  “If you want to sow the seeds of chaos, you need to wait till the rest of the hyungs are here.  Where is Jin-hyung by the way?”

“He’s at the park down the street with Areum and Byeol.  Areum is my wife,” Seokjung explains to you.  

“Areum and Byeol are here?!  You’re saying I can hang out with all three of my favorite girls?!” Tae exclaims.  He shimmies off Seokjung, nearly kneeing Seokjung in the groin.  

“What about Jieun-unnie?” you ask as Tae crouches in front of you.

“Jieun-noona is a menace.  A menace, I tell you!  Hyungie, pay for our dinner!”

“I already did.”  Seokjung rolls his eyes with no heat.

“What are you doing?” you ask incredulously.  Tae remains in his crouched position and you have no idea what’s going on.  

“Get on my back!  You’re too slow!” “I am not and I will not!”

“Get on my back, noona, or I’ll bridal carry you instead!”

At the very real threat, you grumble as you clamber onto his back.  He’s out the door before you can adjust yourself, but you manage to call out, “It was nice to see you, Jungie-oppa!  We ate well!  Thank you!”

“It was nice to see you too!  Kiss Byeol for me!” he calls back to you.

Tae marches you hurriedly down the alley towards where you assume the park is.  It’s funny watching all the plainclothes bodyguards trying to catch up with Tae’s antics.    

“Who’s Byeol?”  You sputter around wisps of Tae’s hair in your nose.

“Only the most beautiful girl in the whole wide world!”

“Wow, thanks.  That was some helpful information, Tae.”

“Anytime!”

The park comes into view, pathways lit, faerie lights in some trees, and a dark lake reflecting the moon.  You don’t know how Tae could possibly know where Jin is in this expanse, but he marches assuredly on.  It isn’t long before Jin comes into view.  There’s a small deck with a few benches.  He’s standing by the railing pointing at something on the lake and you hear a child-like squeal.  The sound seems to spur Tae on because he’s excitedly jogging with you struggling to find a comfortable position.  

“Tae, lemme off!”

“We’re almost there, you potato sack!”

“I am not a potato sack!  You forced me up here!”

“Cuz’ you’re slow!”

“I am not slow!  I am efficient with my energy!”

“Whatever you say, sloth lady!”

“I am not a sloth lady!”

“Okay, sloth man!”

“Tae!”

Your argument alerts Jin who turns around with wide eyes.  The deck is a bit in shadow, jutting out from the path and its lights, but you think you see him panic as you both approach.  

“Taehyung, what are you doing here?” Jin asks incredulously.  

“I’m here to see my niece!  Seokjung-hyung and Areum-noona have deprived me of her for too long!  Hand her over!”  Tae drops you unceremoniously and you stumble to catch your balance.  When you find your equilibrium again, Tae is blowing raspberries into the belly of the most adorable giggly little girl you have ever seen.  She can’t be more than two years old with pudgy cheeks and flailing miniature limbs.  She has Seokjung’s eyebrows and nose, and her dark hair is short, curling at the end.  This is not doing good things to your uterus, oh my god, she’s so cute!  “Byeol, look who’s here!”

Tae points you out and Byeol babbles happily, reaching out to you with chubby hands.  Who are you to deny this little one?  Byeol settles comfortably in your arms with no fuss, her little body tucked against all your curves.  She grabs your corsage, crushing some of the flowers and looks up at you with big beautiful brown eyes and long soft lashes.

“Aren’t the flowers pretty?  But not as pretty as you Byeol,” you coo conversationally.  You pretend to nip her cheek and she squeals in delight and you wish you could make wind chimes out of it.  You are literally melting, goo, a puddle.  Byeol’s nose is so cute, you don’t even try to resist eskimo kissing her, her face scrunching up toothily.   

“Noona, watch this!  Byeol!  Who’s the best?  You’re the best!  Kaepjjang!”

Byeol fists a hand and then gives a thumbs up.  She’s pleased when you all break into laughter.  Even Jin who has been quiet all this time laughs and you want to make a windchime out of that too.  It’s squeaky and hiccupy, and it is such an odd sound to come out of a handsome man, endearing in its contrast.  

“Aigoo, I can’t believe she remembers what samchon Yoongi taught her.  Our Byeol is so smart," Jin says.

“Yoongi-hyung is gonna be so jealous we got to see her,” Tae states gleefully.

Byeol reaches out to Jin and emits an excited squeal as Jin immediately scoops her up making airplane sounds.  You pout feeling bereft of her warm, sturdy, compact body.  

As Tae points out a bird to the little one, you glance around, realizing you’re missing someone.  “Where’s Byeol’s eomma?  Jungie-oppa said she’d be here.”

“She’s here,” Tae answers instead of Jin.

Jin huffs a sigh.  “Areum-noona is just a little ways down the path.  The stroller decided it was the best time to malfunction during a night stroll.”

Tae begins playing peekaboo with Byeol, so you move in closer to Jin to catch her radiant expression.  

“So you met, Seokjung-hyung, huh?  And now you’re here to see Areum-noona and Byeol.  How fortuitous.”  Jin’s tone is weird.  When you glance at him, he’s giving a pointed look at Tae who easily ignores him.

You suddenly feel bad, even if this wasn’t your idea.  Jin hadn’t invited you to meet his family and you blindsided him.  “Sorry for intruding on your family time.”

Jin instantly turns to you, expression horrified.  “No, Y/N.  Don’t apologize.  Tae is just annoying.  I just–you could never intrude.”

“Smooth,” Tae says like a brat.  Jin responds with a jab Tae isn’t quick enough to dodge.  “Ow!  Help!  Byeol, I’m dying!”  

Tae dramatically flops to the ground to the chorus of  Byeol's giggles.

“Now look who’s slow, sloth man," you say as the three of you tower over him.

“I’m not a sloth man.”

“Okay, sloth lady.”

“How did I get stuck with you two on my night off?” Jin despairs.  “It’s like I’m watching three babies.”

“Wow.  Filicide.  Way to turn this biblical.  I like it!” Tae says from the ground.  He gives a thumbs up and Byeol gives him one too.  Oh, you could just eat her up. So cute!

Instead, you lightly elbow Jin.  "I don't think you have a leg to stand on with your Mario figurines and Maplestory plushies," you tease.

"Cuz that's so much worse than a room with my face plastered all over it like a shrine."  Jin smirks at your growing horror.

Oh my god.  You kick Tae who "oof"s. "Tae, I told you that in confidence!"

Tae's eyes widen.  "You can't remember what you ate two weeks ago, but you remember telling me that in confidence?!"

"I didn't remember, but thanks for confirming, you dog bird! And no one remembers what they ate two weeks ago!" you hiss.  

"Waffles. Chapagetti. Ojingeo bokkeum."

"You made that up!"

"No, I didnt!"

"Dog bird!"

"Y/N!" Tae whines.

There's no way you'd ever volunteer that info to Jin who is now squeaking the most you’ve ever heard him squeak.  Of course, Tae told him.  He’s a sucker for bribes and probably traded that secret for nothing more than dumplings.  Tae begs apologies to you, but you're having none of it.  You're so embarrassed you could die.

Byeol reaches for Tae so Jin carefully sets her on Tae’s stomach, who immediately pulls her down to nuzzle her ruddy cheeks.  Ignoring Jin’s continued amusement at your expense, you dig out your phone and start taking pictures.  As you snap pictures of the two, you can’t help but think this is what Tae meant.  Making new memories.  Having new experiences.  You feel eyes on you.  Jin’s laughter has subsided, but he watches you three, content.  He winks at you and you wink back.  

A small woman appears beside him.  “You know, the other day, I almost thought Byeol was having a stroke, but I finally figured out her weird blink was just her trying to wink.  I’m kind of scared to see what she’s gonna be like as an adult with all of you influencing her,” she says wryly as she parks her stroller.  

“Well, at least she has Y/N and noona, so it won’t be that bad,” Tae coos, stroking Byeol’s back.

Areum waves his flattery away, for this must be Areum.  Light brown hair and fae-like with her sharp eyes and sharp nose, but soft lashes and delicate hands.  You’re immediately intimidated by her, but to your surprise she pulls you in and embraces you.  For such a small person, she hugs like a bear.  She pulls back and gives you a once over.  

“You look like you’re in one piece, so that’s good,” she says, gently brushing your hair back.  “I’m Areum, Seokjung’s wife and Jin’s hyungsu.  I know you don’t remember me, but if you ever need anything, like a break from those crazy boys, you just call unnie, okay?  You have my number in your phone.”  

Her motherly tone is warm and inviting and you can't hide the eagerness in your voice.  “I don’t need a break, but I’d love to spend time with you.”   

Areum exudes a quiet confidence that you wish you could emulate.  It isn’t arrogant or vain, even though she’d have every right to be with her looks, but rather it’s a surety in how she holds herself.  Like she knows who she is and what she brings to the table.  You could do with some of that.

You’re graced with a pleased smile.  “Let’s do dinner on Saturday then.  We’d love to spend one on one time with you.  Plus, I think Byeol would love that.”

“Me too.  Let’s do it.”

“What about me?” Tae whines.  “I want to spend more time with Byeol.”

Areum turns a stern look at Tae.  “I know for a fact you have a GQ photoshoot that evening.  There’s no way you’re getting out of it.  Don’t pout.  You don’t think I’ve become immune?  Byeol has taught me resolve of steel.”

Tae makes a sad cry when Areum lifts a sleepy Byeol off him.  

“Sorry, samchon.  You can schedule a different day.  I need to get oppa and this little one home and into bed.  Say goodbye, Byeol.” 

Byeol rubs her eyes and half-consciously waves.  Your eyes catch Tae’s and you share a telepathic contemplation of kidnapping, but you’re scheming is interrupted by the sight of Jin kissing Byeol.  With a sleight of hand you’re not normally capable of, you manage to take a picture in time.  It’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever seen, and you secretly set it as your homescreen.  Movement has you looking up as Areum starts moving away.

“Wait!  Seokjung told me to give Byeol a kiss.”  Areum pauses and kindly waits for you, her smile encouraging despite your outburst.  

Byeol is already asleep in the stroller, hand clutching a blanket and mouth open in a soft o.  You stroke her hair and press your lips to her soft cheek.  “Sweet dreams, Byeol.” 

You place your corsage next to her, petals brushing her hair.  You know Tae won’t get mad at you for passing the gift on.  It just feels right to do.  The three of you watch Areum make her way out of the park, carefully pushing Byeol.  

Your hair stands on end.  Your heartbeat quickens and your body tenses, your gut clenching.  You’re not sure why, until you spot people following Areum and Byeol.  Your mind sounds an alarm, words like ‘stalker’, ‘sasaeng’, and ‘protect’ blaring.  You move to chase after them, but Jin catches your naked wrist.

“It’s okay.  Breathe, Y/N.  They’re just bodyguards,” he explains.  He rubs your wrist and takes a deep breath, showing you how to breathe.  And now you see it, when Tae and Jin’s bodyguards nod to those people.  You continue the deep, steady breaths, the ball of panic dissipating.

Tae tugs the hem of your sweater from your hand.  You hadn’t even noticed you were fiddling with it.  “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.  I’m okay,” you answer weakly.  You suddenly feel exhausted.  Exhausted from a full day.  A good day that you refuse to let the last thirty seconds ruin.

Jin shifts his hand to interlace your fingers.  “Let’s go home.”

You nod and Tae loops your free arm into his, a note of whimsy in your steps as you all stroll home.

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[myechoecho]

Love You Seven Times, eps 15-16

Jin Luo took her own stone heart. She sacrificed herself for Zihui, because he loved her and she truly loved him. She saved him.

To be honest, I'm not sure I entirely trust the king/emperor who is Chu Kong's half brother. Though he does not seem bad?

When Xianguyn she was a cloud she stayed by Chu Kong for thousands of years? I would love that but it seems like the old guy has lied before about her origin.

LOL at Chu Kong setting the conditions for this tribulation.

So Xiangyun's primordial spirit is feeding Chu Kong's?? Well this is not going to be tragic in any way.

The third tribulation starts out dark. Xiangyun has to watch her parents die. But Chu Kong (Sect Leader this time) is there to pick up the pieces.

Please don't tell me I am going to have to suffer through the Punchable Prince in every one of their tribulations. Realistically I knew this but I don't have to like it.

Jin Lian is in this tribulation and is Shangque-esque

Chu Kong is genuinely worried about Xiangyun. He keeps looking at her finger that she bit when her family was slaguhtered

It's really interesting that the Fate Book for the tribulations is only a general outline but the immortals make the story what it becomes

Xiangyun being disobedient, when Chu Kong deliberately asked that she be obedient this time round, further solidifies that whomever they are in the mortal realm, the underlying personality of the immortal remains. unless Li did not write the obedient part in.

LOLOL at the "Listen to the strands of white hair growing out of my scalp"

The look that Chu Kong gives when she says she likes him. Except she keeps talking and it's not quite he wants to hear.

And then he kisses her when she was only trying to tell him he had crumbs on his lips. He is SHOOK by the kiss. He also gets a little emo and pouty after, refusing to drink his tea,

I love that he gave her the little pig (in reference to their first tribulation) and she knew he gave it to her. I laughed at his horror when he thought she cooked Stinky.

It's also nice to see Chu Kong ask for help in winning Xiangyun's affection. Except when he tries to cook for her. Considering he gave all of them food poisoning, he probably should have let htem help him.

Honestly, I love this tribulation more than the second one. I'm sure it's going to get angsty at some point - maybe next episode? It's not meant to be a long tribulation.

Whatever Punchable Prince is planning, is probably going result in her dying which makes me wonder if this might be a recurring theme in Chu Kong and Xiangyun's tribulations. He'll butt in under the pretense of protecting/saving her and ultimately be the one who is responsible for her death. Though honestly, I don't think it would make sense for her to die every time. If the story results in Chu Kong dying first, then I hope Xiangyun stabs him again.

[jiangwanyinscatmom]

Sorry if you have been asked this before, but what do you think of the whole 3zun romance thing some of the fandom likes? Be it the poly or the lxc was with one but then cheated/broke up for the other thing?

Like i know in canon that’s not a thing, yeah lxc was close to jgy but that was a brotherhood like friendship, same with nmj. But in fanon it also kinda gives me the ick, whenever i read a fic and they just casually put some flavor of romance 3zun in it, ends up turning me off to the whole thing. For some reason lxcxjgy or the poly version is what makes me most uncomfortable, I don’t mind lxcxnmj that much to be honest. I guess it might have something to do with just jgy’s character, idk.

But even tho it gives me the ick, im very much a live and let live kind of person so if it is something you like im sorry if I offended you. I understand everyone is free to ship whatever they want

Happy Tuesday, anon.

I don't think about it because I detest it in any kind of romantic implication for Lan Xichen.

It simply isn't and was not ever the most important thing within his life. We get explicitly shown where his concerns were at, which was when Lan Wangji took a stand to protect Wei Wuxian. Who, in Lan Xichen's eyes took advantage of Lan Wangji emotionally. It's without actual character context to say either man personally was his romantic dedication. They weren't as he has no romantic interest in anyone, and is vastly more concerned about his brother's ventures and what he sees as a failed one.

He also isn't completely broken up as fandom likes to portray about Nie Mingjue having died. He is more horrified in the way he was pierced together as a fierce corpse and it's underlying suspicions concerning Jin Guangyao's fake facade. He had hoped that Jin Guangyao had reasons to keep his trust for so many years despite his own misgivings, due to the multitude of unfair condemnations Jun Guangyao was faced with that were untrue. None of these men were as close as fandom portrays, friends also don't mean they know every private thought of the other, or really truly knew each other. Being on good terms does not make a romance.

It also is a disregard for the genuine once true feelings Jin Guangyao did have for Qin Su. However twisted it turned into, he did try to make her happy and wanted her to be happy despite how easy he was able to use it against her. He has a failed love that he kept hold of as a caricature of what could have been.

Anything else, is reader made up preference and reading an intention that was not there to begin with. I know I have had years and generations of friendship with my own friends and it's not at all a thing that would pop up in my mind that our dedication has to be influenced by romance only. It's mean and cruel to propose these bonds have to be important because of romance only.

Have fun as much as the next person, but do not use the argument of "Death of The Author" for personally preferred interpretation that has no contextual merit or authorial intent. Makes me have no interest in the exploration of it when it's proclaimed as being secretly meant to be.

You are allowed to have your fanon much as I am allowed to disregard it as being a viable point of the story we are given.

[mysteriousdoll]

Ishimaru Sibling Headcanons

Inspired by @incoherentramblings posts, I’ve decided to finally sort of properly post about my own Ishimaru family headcanons. I’m of the small majority of the fandom who headcanons Taka, Celeste, and Gundham to all be siblings.

Taka and Celeste are both trans! They quite literally just swapped uniforms (until Taka had to swap schools… twice…)

While Celeste was often out further engaging in her talent (and somehow always at someone’s get together), and Gundham was… somewhere, usually a shelter program with his grandmother or the local pet store, Taka was often with his grandfather being sculpted into a fit replacement. Nobody really knows what took place during that time, but it wasn’t until Taka was 11 that, after an incident, his family cut ties with his grandfather

Celeste hand makes all her clothes, as well as quite a few outfits for her siblings, and often patches her father’s trench coat.

Gundham is EXTREMELY protective of his little siblings. After word got out of them being siblings between their classes at Hopes Peak, he was much more vocal in his distaste towards Mondo, and only bites his tongue regarding Celeste’s admirers because she knows how to blackmail him.

Unlike the game Hifumi has good writing here because I liked his character up till the creepy Alter Ego thing… anywho, him and Celeste are genuinely friends! They bond a lot regarding specific manga and Lolita fashion! Celeste likes being a model for him for his art… plus it means she gets to play dress up no matter how extravagant the outfit.

While both twins have their own self destructive habits, Celeste having a tendency to bite her finger that the claw is on as well as straws and even some plastic items, Taka has more. He tugs on his hair, scratches his hands, and bites his lip.

Gundham notices this and tries to help as best he can. He’s gotten multiple stim jewelry for Celeste, and will try and occupy Taka’s hands when he gets distressed. Either with his own hands or his scarf.

Gundham was closest with their mother, and upon her passing, made a promise to her to keep the twins safe. He’s been caught a few times scolding Celeste for something mischievous or Taka for not taking care of himself

Taka is the best cook out of them all! He originally didn’t know many recipes but asked Teruteru to each him more about cooking… and while he doesn’t understand why Teruteru seems sort of frightened, he’s enjoyed the lessons he’s had.

Gundham is strong willed but the moment the twins tear up they give in. No hesitation.

Taka is a system! Ishida is part of that system, as well as a child alter known as Kiyo, and one other known one who Ishida is cautious of, only ever referred to as “Ishiru”.

While the siblings don’t associate much with one another before Hopes Peak, once there and the secret gets out, they’re much more open about it all… which secretly makes Taka happy as can be. Even if he knew that his siblings only used other names to avoid connections to the family, part of him always wondered if it was him.

Ishida doesn’t really get along with anyone in the family but Takaaki, as shown by him allowing him to call him Kiyondo (the only others allowed to do this being Taka, Kiyo, Sakura, Hina, Kaede, and Makoto.)

Celeste constantly pokes fun at Taka and Mondo’s relationship (calling Mondo whipped on a regular basis, Taka never quite understanding why), but Gundham can’t stand the two being together only due to seeing delinquents previously hurt Taka.

The kids are all very close with their father… but no one understands how such animated kids came from a man who has little to no emotion ever.

Celeste is trying to learn more and more about her father’s teenage years, as according to Hiroko and Jin, he was extremely rebellious.

Realistically, nobody in the family can resist Taka’s tears… and while it’s very rare… he will take it to his advantage when he really wants something. (Ex; hanging out with mondo late at night, having Chihiro over so she can help him with ‘computer studies’)

Taka was introduced to ARGs, unfiction, and Wham City Comedy by Chihiro. She suggested it to him when he made a passing comment that the series his friends showed him were nice but didn’t feel like they called for much beyond enjoyment… so she showed him This House and the two spent the entire weekend trying to break it down. Now he’s trying to get his siblings into some of them… they don’t seem too interested until he makes a small note about the Wyoming Incident which causes Celeste to question it, and finding herself just as invested as him.