#I said oh gross y’all

[pastelprince18]

Guess who left work early

This fucker :]

[tailsz]

Demon slayer men boyfriend headcannons‼️

(NSFW INCLUDED)

——————————

Includes : Tanjiro , Zenitsu , Inosuke , Tomioka , Sanemi , Tengen , Obanai , Muzan , Akaza , Douma , and Kokushibo

(this is my first post so bear with me AND english isn’t my first language so sorry for mistakes!)

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Tanjiro!

okay so we ALL know this guy has the sweetest heart so expect a lot of lovely dovey gestures such as….

Cute little morning letters if he leaves before you or you just don’t work as a demon slayer!

something along the lines of “i made you breakfast eat it before it gets too cold!! I hope you have a lovely day and i love you so so much”

(if ur parents are still alive 😍) he will absolutely win them over EVEN IF THEYRE THE MOSG HARDCORE PEOPLE EVERRR

he has a way with people what can you say

multiple lunch dates a week are a must! you guys go out and try as as many restaurants when you guys go on missions together if ur a demon slayer!

if not he will personally bring you takeout from his missions!

you and nezeko bonded a lot and she LOVES when you play with her hair it makes her sleepy ASAP (tanjiro walked in during the middle of this and his heart almosy exploded)

for y’all’s free time you both decided to try new hobbies together like Yoga, art , dancing ETC ITS VERY CUTE MOMENTS!

NSFW!

he’s a soft dom! but if you bring up the thought of you topping him he will NOT object

OH HE IS SUCH A ROMANTIC IN BED

Sex with him is literally the embodiment of “love making” because he showers you with love and pleasure

MISSIONARY 100% OF THE TIME

he is vanilla but that doesn’t matter because he’s drowning you with praises and caressing your perfect body <3

his aftercare is literally going to heaven and back

he’ll massage you and whisper sweet nothings into your ears

THIGHS GUY

———————————————

Zenitzu!!

at the beginning he’s really REALLY awkward

might even like be hella weird towards you (because you’re the first woman/man he’s ever been perused as romantically)

SO GIVE HIM TIME HE’LL GET THERE

Once he does he will quite LITERALLY will kill everyone in a room and then himself for you

you are his princess (your also his knight and shining armor because… well… it’s zenitzu…)

1000% shows you off like a medal of honor to ANYONE AND I MEAN ANYONE

this one time he was blabbing about you to a stranger to the point where said stranger just respectfully told him he doesn’t care

you had to STRAP HIM DOWN to prevent bodily injuries

he likes taking afternoon walks with you , he really enjoys the beautiful site with his beautiful partner

he randomly picks up flowers from the ground and gives them to you because they reminded you of him!

NSFW!!

he is a switch with a bottom preference

the thought of you just absolutely demolishing him will get his body all fuzzy and tingling 🤭

reverse cowgirl is his FAVORITE POSITION OF ALL TIME HANDS DOWN

the nights when it’s not just pleasure he likes to top you and take things slow to show you just how much you mean to him

as well as absolutely showering you with corny praises (he’s so silly!)

HIS AFTER CARE IS ODD

if he’s SPENT he will most likely pass out leaving you in charge of aftercare

if not he’ll just cuddle u to sleep

(totally not because that means he’ll see u naked again in the morning)

TITS GUY

—————————————————————

inosuke!

he didn’t comprehend the fact that you 2 we’re dating 🧍🏽‍♀️

you had to explain to him and half way through the was flustered and asked you to SQARE UP?? (HE HAD A NO IDEA HOW TO RESPOND TO THAT)

like zenitsu he was also very much awkward if not more at the start of the start of the relationship

But not awkward in a hes shy way

NO HES AWKWARD BECAUSE HE DOESNT WANT TO SHOW??? FEELINGS??

because that’s gross

Tanjiro and Zenitsu had to help the guy to at least an OUNCE of a romantic

he’s really not much of one though

his idea of dates or romance of training or fighting w/ you!

you don’t really mind but if it does get to a point where it bothers you by the lack of romance

HE WILL TRY (key word TRY) to be more affectionate towards you!

he sees a pretty rock? it’s yours!

he sees a pretty branch it’s yours!

he sees a cute cayote? It’s you-

the time he actually brought you one you almost SHAT yourself 😓

NSFW!!

oh he’s a dom

he views smexy time as a challenge

so you bringing up the idea of topping is you trying to WIN and he would rather DIE than lose

again the concept was a foreign area to him

and if you both get to the sexual parts for a relationship , he will seek guidance from you!

(while also refusing for you to demonstrate for him because he “knows what he’s doing” 😒

what’s aftercare?

he does not do it at first meaning you are doing it

after a while he’ll start picking up after you and do it himself

(if you tease him about it he will throw you off the bed)

ASS GUY

—————————————————————

Tomioka!

When he asked you out he said

“will you take my hand in a relationship”

it’s as serious as it sounds

he is comfortable as soon as you begin the relationship because of 2 reasons

for him to consider a relationship with you , you’d guys would’ve have to know eachother for a while

and because if you didn’t want him you would’ve said no

AND SINCE YOU DIDNT😍

hes 100% sure you guys will be just fine WHICH YOU ARE :D

little small gestures of affection from you will get his heart flipping like—

holding his hands ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU BEGING CONTACT WITH PINKY TOUCH 😓

(he’s touch starved FEED HIM)

the one time you begged him to let you style his hair was the day that he won’t let you do anything else BUT that

he loves how your fingers feel against his head

sending tingles down his spine of safety yk?

he carries anything you give him in his haori (like little charms!)

he likes it when you whisper sweet nothings into his ears it gets him all giggly

NSFW!!

he is a switch with no preference

he will be whatever you want him to be 😍

when he top’s he can get carried away with eagerness

when you guys have sex he very much loses his mind which is why he can be rough when he tops

HOWEVER WHEN HE BOTTOMS JESUS CHRIST

He will be a whimpering mess

being your little slut asking for more n more <3

being a hashira he can and WILL last very long

he’s 1000% into hair pulling both giving n reviving

as u guys last longer n longer into the relationship he will be more open to risks 😍

(like public sex)

this one time did the deed in a public bathroom in a restaurant while the rest of the hashiras were waiting on the food 🤭

He will run a bath for the 2 of you afterwards and fall asleep in each others arms<3

he’s an ass guy

—————————————————————

Sanemi!

like giyuu , for him to consider a relationship with you , you have a LONGG history

it took him a while for him to actually ask you out 🧍🏽‍♀️

it got to the point where he was going to lose you to someone else because of how long it took

shinobu “helped” to ask you out

and by help i mean he forced him to ask you out in front of her

shinobu top tier wingwoman fr fr ‼️(she had enough of him wasting an opportunity so she took matters into her own hands)

he will absolutely NOT do PDA (at least at the beginning of the relationship)

his ego n pride are too much for that

once he gets over himself he will at MOST hold hands with you ig 😒😒

he forces u to train with him

he is an AMAZING cook and makes you breakfast n lunch (house husband material!!)

he’s also surprisingly good at doing hair whether it’s short or long! (he makes u buns a lot )

he’s such a romantic behind closed doors

shinobu caught him in the middle of that act and while she didn’t tell anyone…

she teased him to DEATH

NSFW!!

oh he’s a MEAN top no questions asked

he will degrade you to the BONE (which you don’t mind 🤭)

he’s also very VERY rough hitting and attacking ALLL of your sweet spots on your body (inside as well 😋)

he loves calling you a needy slut 🤭

ONE TIME. he has a wet dream where you topped him and... HE WOKE UP WITH THE HARDEST BONER OF HIS LIFE

he will never ever EVERR bring up the idea of u topping him ( if you bring up he MIGHT let it happen🤨 he’s so stubborn)

HE IS SO MEAN WHEN IT COMES TO ORGASM.

if he’s fucking you because he’s jealous or you pissed him off???

he’s going to deny your orgasms for an hour ☠️

SEX DRIVE?? MEDIUM

STAMINA IS . HIGHHHH

he’s pretty average with aftercare , he’ll bring u water n a towel

on a good day you both will shower together! (50/50 chance that y’all will fuck again!)

he’s a thigh guy

—————————————————————

tengen!!

what’s another wife to the list?

all four of them (tengen n his wives) found you very attractive at first sight and they had NO shame into admitting that

after knowing you for a while THEY ALL asked you join the relationship! it caught u off guard 😨

when you entered the relationship they literally all wanted u for themselves 😓

tengen is SUCH A ROMANTIC AND WILL ABUSE PDA SO MUCH

if you’re a fellow hashira my god he will tease you in public so much??? and you’re like FOR WHAT???

hashira meetings will get HELLA awkward with both of y’all (everyone is just like “this again??☠️”

like zenitzu he will FLEX U SOO BAD especially to single folks because in his eyes being single is such a skill issue 🤨

his form of affection is expensive gifts so

EXPECT TO BE PAMPERED WITH A LOT OF JEWELRY 🤭 ( we love sugar daddies )

he also refuses to NOT take y’all on fancy restaurants because anything other than that is LAME AND TACKY 🤨

MATCHING OUTFITS ARE A MUST!!

after he retired, you guys have religious weekly movie nights a lot (you all take turns in picking movies)

NSFW!!

OKAY SO TENGEN IS A SWITCH WITH A PREFERENCE ON TOPPING

now he has 2 different ways of going about it

if it’s sex on One on One , HE IS SO MEAN??

he will 100% mock you during the whole thing

mocking when you choke on air or a moan is his specialty 😓😓

seeing you cock drunk will drive him CRAZY

thighs are so HOT TO HIM (thigh highs are a must!)

he leaves so many bite marks and bruises on your inner thighs

HIS HANDS ARE HUGE DAWG

he likes fingering before fucking and GOD HES SO GOOD AT FINGERING?

he can n WILL make u come more than twice with just his fingers😓

it’s a the whole group sex with him n his wife’s

he’s a sweetheart! taking care of his little princess nasty needs!

when he bottoms with all 4 of you on him he gets so cocky 😒

he loves how you all take care of HIS nasty needs in such a good way

HAIR PULLING

and he’s very much into orgasm denial HES A JERK

def a tits guy

bdsm king

—————————————————————

OBANAI ( i love him sm ) <333

okay uh

before y’all started dating he was so shy around you because??? you’re so??? perfect?????

if you so much as breathe into his direction he will literally die

he asked u in the most romantic cliche ever (but it doesn’t matter because he pulled it off so well??)

he made you follow little notes at night eventually leading to a tree that had a saying “will you be my mine and go out on a date with me?” with 2 boxes saying yes and no

at first you were confused until you saw a familiar snake 🤭 making you giggle you chose the yes box!

HE WAS INTERNALLY SCREAMING BC HE THOUGHT HE WAS BEING HELLA CRINGE 😓

moving onto the relationship…

he is literally the perfect boyfriend

when he gets needy n wants to talk to u , he sends kaburamaru to fetch you!

kaburamaru literally loves u too ! ( obanai also send u flowers through him!)

he gets jealous easy like VERY

he’s very protective of you ! and he expects the same because you are his and he’s all urs <3

will literally end the bloodline of ANYONE who talks smack abt u

at first, yalls kisses would be with his mask on. he still wasn’t ready to let that open yet

after a whole LONG while , he got enough confidence to kiss u with his scars and everything (which u appreciated and enjoyed very much <3)

he likes holding pinkies while walking together

he’s not really a fan of PDA but if someone is trying to flirt with u????

oh U BETTER BET HES GOING TO BE ALL OVER U (u don’t complain)

he makes flower crowns for the both of y’all daily <33

y’all have hella picnic dates it’s getting out of hand atp! y’all barely eat at home

NSFW!!

obanai is a top with 2 sides to him…

A- he can be the most sappy romantic when y’all have sex

OR B- HES LITERALLY BEING ASSHOLE TO YOU

There’s in NO between

when hes being a jerk he denies orgasms

and his liking to marking is x10

he loves leaving bitemarks he knows u can’t hide🤭

def into u riding him but HES in total control

u brought up that you like it when he puts his hair in a pony tail when y’all have sex so HE DOES IT ALL THE TIME

he’s not really much of a risk taker

will not stop unless your trembling😋

if he’s being sweet he’s take things slow making sure your enjoying yourself as well as him <3

will whisper sweet nothings <3

HIS EARS ARE SENSITIVE‼️‼️

he treats u like a goddess in aftercare

will get u water , a towel , a warm bath , tons of cuddles and a lil snack 😋

HES INTO BONDAGE

HES AN ASS GUY 🤭🤭

—————————————————————

Muzan 😨

to how you got together? you don’t even know

if your a human , you ran into while im a hurry ! you work at a flower shop and was carrying flower pots getting dirt all over his clothes

now he was so ready to end the puny moron who ran into him but..

when he saw you apologizing and apologizing your heart out he felt something? what the hell was that? well it’s not like matters… 😁

If you’re a demon you first of all had to have know him and been loyal to him for CENTURIES for him to even REMOTELY like you

once he does tho you’re always buy his side , like his right hand man/woman! it may seem like he just thinks ur strong but this is his way of spending time with u<33 (while being in denial😓)

now how he asked you out. he didn’t do anything fancy! he just called you in and he straight up told you he liked you and would like make yalls relationship more

if you are a human.. he brought you to a demon meeting and told everyone there that if they even THINK about doing ANYTHING to you he will turn them inside out and throw into the sun<3

he thinks akaza is the best fit for his lovely human wife! you guys get along rlly well

he will keep DOUMA FARRRR AWAY FROM YOU.

koko and u like to read and drink tea together! he finds ur being calming

if you’re a demon everyone already knows u but know muzan expects equal respect from them to you!

though he can be very cold at blunt at time , he can still be romantic towards you!

he likes buying you expensive things to make u feel like a queen

if a human or demon disrespects you in ANY WAY not matter how big or small?they will be no more 😓

NSFW!!

oh man no matter how i see it.

HE

IS

A

TOP

he’s the demon king he expects to be in full control at ALL times and 9 times outta 10.. HE IS MEAN TO U

Doesn’t matter how much he loves you , you will never be superior to him 🧍🏽‍♀️

certified brat tamer!

oh he’s definitely into marking you just the thought of owning what’s rightfully his gets him hard

he’s into degradation so much it’s a problem atp☠️

dont ever degrade him tho

he’ll make sure you NEVER walk again

he puts the d in bdsm

will not stop until you’re a whimpering and crying mess only able to scream out his name :(

he doesn’t know if he likes public sec because he doesn’t like the idea of the chance that people have on seeing what only HE can see

ON THE OTHER HAND. THAT MEANS PEOPLE KNOW UR HIS AND ONLY HIS EVEN MORE….

—————————————————————

Akaza!!

Whether your a demon slayer/hashira or a fellow uppermoon, akaza admired you for being strong

after all akaza think people who r both mentally and physically strong r the best as u can tell with rengoku

before he asked u out, he had to come to terms with it , as he felt he was betraying his late wife

after he accepted the fact that’s it’s okay to move on.. he asked you out in the most akaza way!

he got you a bouquet of flowers 💐 with a little note in it telling u about all the things that he absolutely loves abt u! after reading them , he asked you out!

if you’re a demon you both will be more relaxed about people knowing abt you’re relationship!

until muzan found out.. at first he disapproved because he saw no benefits from u two being in love 🤨

but later on seeing how you two empower eachother be GUESSES it’s ok 😒😒

HOWEVER IF YOURE A HASHIRA..

you two r trying to HARD to keep it super lowkey

it’s mostly night dates n visits you guys can do :( but it’s ok u guys make it work

because the SECOND one or both of ur masters find out… YALL R DEAD

REGARDLESS akaza is very flexible with himself (as a metaphor BUT HE PROBABLY IS LITERALLY)

he absolutely LOVESS self care nights with you!!

talking shit while doing eachother a face masks is one of his favorite pastimes! (the pretty mama gotta do what he can to stay pretty DUH)

douma teases him abt u so much it’s driving him mad

especially because douma is hella touchy w/ h JUST to piss akaza off

which it always ends with douma head on the floor😨

NSFW!!

akaza is 100% a switch with a top preference

he teases u a lot.. BUT IF YOURE A HASHIRA HE STRAIGHT UP MOCKS U😓😓

like he’ll say things like “i thought hashiras we’re supposed to have a lot of stamina.. what’s wrong :(“ ALL WHILE HES SMIRKING

he likes eating you out before fucking you

THE THINGS HIS TOUNGE CAN DO TO UR BODY 😓

he is very rough with you, but holds back a bit if you’re human because if he goes all out he will quite literally break u

IF YOURE A DEMON THO YOURE IN FOR IT ALL😍‼️‼️

even when he’s bottoming he’s still being a little asshole 😒

he completely switches up w/ aftercare! he’s such a sweetheart making u a bath for the two if u to cuddle in for a bit<33

he is a THIGH MAN ALL THE WAY his hands r always resting on them 🤭

—————————————————————

douma!

oh my ?

ok douma likes energetic people so that’s a starter for him to start liking you and ofc knowing you for a couple of decades

i think the thing that sealed off his love for you was the fact that you didn’t treat him like he was weird yk?

you talked to him like he was normal person (well demon but you get what i mean! but he’s SOO far from normal ☠️☠️)

MOVING ONNN he asks you out by making a little game out of it! maybe like pictionary or hang man! it’s rlly silly <33

while your dating even if your a demon or human he will treat you like your made of glass

he views you like one of his dolls ! therefore your his precious

he rlly likes it when you style his hair , in fact he asks you to do so regularly

during the summer time it gets rlly humid n hot as hell in japan even at night so he used his demon art to cool u both off !

akaza asked you to blink 3 times if the relationship was not from ur free will when he found out 😨😨

u guys both have matching fans 🤭🤭

muzan has to literally rip his head off because douma won’t stop talking to u during meetings ☠️

HE IS A BRITNEY SPEARS STAN ‼️‼️

NSFW!!

douma is a switch with no preference it just depends on hows feeling that day (it’s mostly bottom)

He is such a bratty bottom i tell you, he just pushes your buttons til u snap

and snapping means you literally demolishing his ass until she can’t even form any sentences :(

oh jesus christ but when he tops?????

praying for u fr fr

douma is unfair as hell

HE WILL DENY YOUR ORGAMS FOR FUNSIES?? like NOTHING ABT THAT IS FUNNY??

he is súper into bondage

AND EVERYTHING HES SO KINKY

never feel afraid to tell this man any of ur kinks even if they’re weird bc douma will try it out with you no hesitation!

his aftercare is a little rocky but it’s nothing too bad..

at most hes get you both waters and y’all will just chill in bed or anywhere

speaking of anywhere.. HE WILL FUCK U ANYWHERE HE DOES NOT CARE‼️‼️

one time muzan heard y’all bc y’all are SO LOUD (he decapatated both of you on the spot)

he is an ass guy oh my god he can’t go a day without touching it 😓

—————————————————————

Kokushibo!!

okay first all i dont think he cares what type of personality u r (extroverted or introverted)

it does take him a while to accept his feelings towards you because he doesn’t many to get distracted from his duties

but when he pushes that aside he just straight up asks you to stay by his side for the rest of time 💐

he doesn’t do PDA because your love life is not the business of others (muzan thanks the lords for this because he does NOT want to see that)

you guys randomly found a black cat following you one time while on a mission and you wanted to keep it with him!

…..YOU HAD TO BEG HIM FOR AN HOUR BUT HE eventually GAVE IN💔

y’all named her Ei (he will never admit but he will kill anyone who harms her bc he loves her sm)

you like to kiss all 6 of his eyes after a long day (he expects you to do it regularly and gets upset when u don’t)

sometimes asks you do braid his hair to change up his hair style 😋

he makes u train with him to he ensure you’re able to defend yourself from anyone!

matching katanass!! (much to his dismay because god forbid y’all do something cute 😒)

hel likes to carry you in piggy back style a lot 😋

NSFW!!

oh he’s a top no doubt

he will absolutely NOT let u top

BUT YOURE OK WITH IT BECAUSE GAWD DAMN

he is so rough with you that’s all he knows what to do<3

before touching you he wants to see you beg for it he LOVES seeing you all pathetic

HE LOVES FUCKING YOU AGAINST A WALL‼️‼️

he loves it because that means your trapped within in him, with no where to go and he has you EXACTLY how he wants you

oh he pulls your hair a lot when you give him head 🤭

he’s always biting your ears bc he knows they’re sensitive 🤭

he loves missionary as the main position because he gets to see all the expressions he’s making you have <3

HE IS A ASS GUYS ‼️‼️

———————————————————

okay that’s it guys! leave me any request i’ll be happy to do so! <33

[povlnfour]

ੈ✩‧₊˚ HEY TWITTER! (AA23)

pairing: alex albon x f!reader

summary: alex spends the night of a concert dancing with a beautiful stranger, he remembers everything about her, from her outfit to what her favorite song was — well, except for her name.

genre: humour, fluff

authors note: dedicated to my fabulous 🪐 anon for the most incredible idea (and also just being the most beautiful human being)

*faceclaim for y/n: yasmin wijnaldum (but please imagine her as you see fit)

dutch anthem antis ੈ✩‧₊˚

alex_albon just tweeted ੈ✩‧₊˚

twitter reacts ੈ✩‧₊˚

meanwhile, texts between lily and y/n ੈ✩‧₊˚

lilymhe just posted a photo ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by yourusername and 23,018 others

lilymhe one of us had way too much to drink last night, you have one guess

view all comments

yourusername um idk this is really difficult

lilymhe it’s the sticker gem still on your face that is getting me

user wait…. is this her…

lilymhe is this WHO

user GUYS I THINK THIS MIGHT BE HER

user GOOD JOB INTERNET

user @/alex_albon CAN YOU CONFIRM OR DENY

alex_albon OH MY

user IM TAKING THAT AS A YES

new activity ੈ✩‧₊˚

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⬅️ yourusername followed alex_albon back

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y/n’s dms with alex ੈ✩‧₊˚

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liked by lilymhe, alex_albon and 50,081 others

yourusername challenge: which one of us had the most fun this past few days

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alex_albon well if you don’t say you then i fear i bought you dinner for no reason

user IT WAS HER!!! WE DID IT GUYS

user he found out who she was a few hours ago and he’s already on her instagram… maybe he has more power than we thought

lilymhe definitely not me i’ve been sat in a hotel room while you go meet boys

yourusername he bought doughnuts for us to share. omw to you with them now🤝

lilymhe i take it back @alex_albon you can stay

alex_albon just posted a photo ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by yourusername and 150,608 others

alex_albon a story in 3 parts

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user idk what you did but i’m sure you deserved that middle finger

yourusername that food coma hit different

lilymhe you’re telling me i walked in to you both laying like vampires passed out

user the plot thickens

user heavily entertained by the idea of alex legitimately falling in love with a girl whilst drunk, hunting her down using the internet, and then going instagram official within 72 hours

user i don’t think they’re dating aha

user @/user ok well if he doesn’t want her then i do

user okay answer quickly are y’all dating

yourusername no one knows

alex_albon dating? what’s dating?

dutch anthem antis ੈ✩‧₊˚

williamsracing just posted a photo ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by yourusername, mclaren and 100,058 others

williamsracing hit tweet, who’s this?

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user WILLIAMS I LOVE YOU

lilymhe can u ask him to order me more doughnuts pls

user so real, using best friend privileges

user he’s not a want but a need

yourusername oh i miss that face already☹️

liked by alex_albon

mclaren @/williamsracing heard you may be in need of our services…?

williamsracing we’re listening👀

mclaren plans are already in action🤝

yourusername just tweeted ੈ✩‧₊˚

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yourusername just posted a photo ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by lilymhe, landonorris and 56,109 others

yourusername safe to say he learnt the meaning of the word dating

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user FINALLY

user alex albon most successful twitter user

lilymhe AND I DIDNT HEAR ABOUT THIS???

yourusername i tried to ring you but you didn’t pick up😔

lilymhe @/yourusername RING ME AGAIN WTF

alex_albon @/lilymhe she’s busy rn😁

lilymhe @/alex_albon GROSS

alex_albon @/lilymhe NOT LIKE THAT

alex_albon just posted a photo, 1 year later ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by landonorris, yourusername and 105,660 others

alex_albon got her number, remembered her name, kept her around for a year

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user wow who said romance was dead huh

user when we talk about having fanfic moments… that’s these two

user ok now bring her to the next race we miss seeing her in the paddock

landonorris and yet IM the one with no rizz

yourusername your girlfriend literally called you cute and you folded. shut up.

landosgf babe our relationship started because you hit me with your car ? that’s not rizz it’s stupidity

landonorris i regret ever introducing you two

yourusername i love you, or whatever🙄

mclaren @/williamsracing i’m not seeing a thank you?

williamsracing logan would have thanked us

alex_albon yes that’s right set him up next

logansargeant no thank yOU i can’t deal with the headache

——————

a/n: okay🤓 first post in a while. half written pre baby half written post. hopefully i’ve still got it LMAO. off to finish some written bits / write a new oscar imagine idea i had over the month

will i ever stop this mclaren matchmaking saga? i don’t think so

taglist: @iloveyou3000morgan @scopeiguess @gwginnyweasley @hetfieldd @sweetbabygirlsworld @wittywhispers @bingewatche @sebvettelsgirl @casperlikej @geniusalpaca @namgification @orangetreekid @

[itgetsdark-x]

This Heat is Gettin’ To Me

Summary: Beach day’s with your dad had always been enjoyable; the sun, the sea, the beer and now Joel was there, it was far more enjoyable for you.

Warnings: 18+, MDNI plssss!! Public sex, age gap (unspecified but Joel would be mid forties, reader in twenties), unprotected p in v (do better & wrap it)

Characters: Dbf!Joel Miller x (f) reader

Word Count: 3.1k

(Divider by @saradika-graphics)

It was a baking hot day, the peak of summer and here you were; at the beach with your father and his close friend, Joel Miller. Days at the beach had always been your favourite times and now that Joel was here it provided a new level of attraction to the day out. You had been here since pretty early in the morning which luckily meant you had a good spot on the beach, there were people everywhere; families with young children, couples, friends and even a few dogs running around. Somewhere in the back of your mind you wondered if people thought your father and Joel were a couple. 

“Do you not ever get worried that people will assume you and my dad are a couple?” You asked bluntly, peering up over your sunglasses to stare at Joel who was rubbing sunscreen into his muscly biceps. 

“What?!” Joel laughed, pausing his motions in confusion. 

“Well I was sat here reading my book, people watching and looking at all the couples and stuff and then I thought about you and dad.” You shrugged. “I mean, I totally ship it. Just you men never have girlfriends and now I’m thinking it’s because ladies are scared off by thinking you’re a couple.”

Joel shook his head with a fond smile on his features, he went back to applying his sunscreen; you leant back onto your arms and greedily watched him behind your shades. His large palms rubbed over his arms and eventually reached his chest, soft white and dark hairs peppered over his tanned skin and you would lying if you said it didn’t make you wet. You gently rubbed your thighs together, trying to stave off the throbbing as you imagined how it would feel to have his hands all over your body. 

You were ripped from your filthy thoughts when an outline of a man appeared in front of you and handed you a beer, you looked up the sun blocking his features but you knew it was your dad. 

“You okay, sweetie? You look flushed.” Your dad asked and resumed his position next to you, he laid down under the sun shade and rested his arm behind his head. 

“Y-yeah, must be the sun. I’ll go into the sea in a bit and cool down.” You lied, Joel looked over at you with a raised brow but directed his attention back to rubbing the sunscreen into his legs. 

It almost killed you off and you stared into the can of your beer and sipped at it, trying to distract yourself in any way possible. 

“Oh, your sweet daughter there seemed to have an epiphany whilst you were doing the drinks run.” Joel laughed, sitting the other side of you and cracking open his cool beer. 

“Yeah? What was it, sweet pea?” 

“Nothing. Just maybe wondered if the reason y’all don’t have girlfriends is because people think you and Miller are dating or something.” You shrugged, your gaze darting between the two men. 

Your dad barked out a loud laugh, which in turn, cause your own to erupt and soon the three of you were sat there in your own little world, crying with laughter. Your dad recovered from his laughing fit, wiping his tears away with the backs of his hand and shook his head. 

“Sweet pea, I can’t speak for Joel but I’m single because it’s not a priority for me. I go out to bars and see all these younger women with their next-to-nothing outfits on and it just makes me sad. I’m yet to find a woman but that doesn’t mean I haven’t had offers.” Your dad smirked. 

“Gross. So. Gross.” You fake gagged and looked down at your book. “Fine. I’m still convinced people think y’all are a couple and that’s why. But sure. You’ve had offers.”

Joel was still softly chuckling, he looked at you both with adoration and his heart ached softly for his Sarah, she had gone off to college and found herself a nice guy there so she was rarely home anymore, mainly just for the big days like Thanksgiving or Christmas. He watched as your dad joked around with you, his heart bloomed at the thoughts of Sarah but more importantly, he kept staring at you. The way you moved or the way your eyes seemed to sparkle whenever something made you laugh; he could watch you all day with intense interest, he wanted to make you laugh more just to see the sparkle in your features. He certainly couldn’t help the way his eyes followed your heaving chest as you laughed, the red fabric of your bikini top seemed like it could give out any second, somewhere in Joel’s mind he urged it to happen, just so he could catch a glimpse of you, more of you. 

Joel knew his feelings, his lust for you, was wrong on many levels but he also felt like it was mutual at times. He was sure he could see your eyes roaming his body, he could see your mind ticking away at thoughts of him. He tried to be better than his thoughts and not get carried away with them but days at the beach made it impossible, especially when you would walk off to go swim or get a drink; the bottoms of your bikini rose up so high he could almost see all of your ass as you walked. 

-

The day wore on, you had your nose in your book for the majority of it, only occasionally leaving to go get another drink or take a dip into the cool sea to cool yourself off. That’s where you were now, you were in the sea, just bobbing along and swimming casually, more just there to feel the cool embrace of the salty water on your tanning skin. You could see your dad and Joel, still, your father had fallen asleep after a couple of beers and no doubt, the heat. Joel was there, his thick legs outstretched as he watched people walk by; you couldn’t help but feel your stomach drop when Joel smiled at a younger woman who walked by, his eyes followed her as she left his line of vision. 

You left the water, walked back over to where your father and Joel were sat and you grabbed your towel from the floor, making sure to bend yourself over in Joel’s direction. He noticed, of course he did. His eyes tracked up the length of shapely legs until his gaze bored into your behind, the wet material of your bikini bottoms clung to your ass. 

“This,” you gestured at your dad. “Is the reason you old men shouldn’t drink in the heat, you can’t handle it.” You teased with a soft laugh as you sat yourself down next to Joel on the beach towels. 

“I’m still standing, aren’t I?” Joel retorted with a roll of his eyes. 

“Barely, Miller.” You smirked and grabbed your sunscreen from your bag. 

You took a generous amount and started to rub it into the soft skin of your legs, stretching yourself to cover every inch of your skin liberally. Joel’s eyes watched you, they watched your delicate hands rub your flesh and he hungrily thought how it should be him rubbing you down like that. 

“Joel?” You said annoyed, waving your small hand in front of his features. “I just asked could you please rub some into my back for me?”

Joel was pulled from his trance, crashing back down to earth and silently, he thanked someone up there for answering his prayers. 

“Of course I can, darlin’.” He smiled sweetly and tapped the spot on his towel next to him. “C’mhere and sit in front of me.”

You nodded and placed yourself in front of the male, as instructed. Joel’s large hands were soon rubbing at the bare flesh of your shoulders and you shuddered under his touch, the sunscreen cool against your burning skin. His hands dipped lower, his fingers rubbing the creamy liquid into your skin; his fingers dug into your shoulders roughly and you couldn’t help the small moan that escaped your lips. 

Joel couldn’t help but smirk to himself as he let his fingers expertly massage your tense shoulders, your head lulled forward as you enjoyed the sensation of him massaging you. 

“You wanna stop moaning so loud, your daddy will wake up and get the wrong idea, sweetheart.” Joel chuckled, his voice fanning across your ear as he leant forward. 

“Feels so good though.” You sighed happily, your eyes falling shut as Joel continued to rub your body down. 

“Too bad your sunscreen is applied then, isn’t it.” Joel teased with a smirk. 

You whined softly, feeling annoyed as his hands left your body and you turned your head behind yourself to look at the male. 

“D-don’t stop… please. Feels so good.”

Joel cocked his head to the side as you took his hands and placed them back on your body, you held his hand as you guided them back over to your skin. You slid them slowly down the curved lines of your side, back up and let them draw slowly over your bikini-clad chest until you rested them back onto your shoulders with a soft, contented sigh. 

Joel cleared his throat behind you, he could feel himself almost immediately stiffen in his swim shorts as his palms rubbed over your chest, he could feel the hard bud of your nipples under the thin fabric. There had always been flirtatious jokes between you, ever since you came into Joel’s life you had become this sort of forbidden fruit that lingered over his head. He knew he couldn’t ever have you, you were his friend’s daughter and so much younger than him. But there you were today, in an impossibly small bikini, your smooth skin just begging to be devoured by him there and then. And your hands on his? Leading him over the most forbidden expanses of your body, right whilst your father snoozed by you both. 

“Darlin’…” Joel warned breathlessly, his hands still massaging your shoulders. 

“Joel.” You smirked. 

“What are you playing at?” He asked quietly, his face lingering near the skin of your neck, his lips ghosting over you causing you to shudder. 

“Hmm?” You hummed innocently. “Just putting you to work, your massage feels amazing. Plus you’re protecting my delicate, young skin from the dangers of skin cancer.” You jested. 

“Oh is that right? I forgot you needed sunscreen smeared over your bikini.” 

You laughed softly, you knew you Joel wanted you and you wanted him just as bad. You weren’t sure whether it was a cumulative reaction from the baking sun, the beers or Joel’s heady scent but something was making you bold; your eyes scanned the area to ensure no eyes were on you before you took Joel’s hands once more and landed them onto your breasts. You squeezed his hands this time so he could properly cup the fleshy mounds and you bit back a soft moan. 

“I want you…” you whispered, you could still feel Joel’s lips near your skin and he soon took it upon himself to kiss at the sensitive pulse point in your neck. 

You pressed your body backwards to his and almost immediately you could feel the hard curve of his thick member pressing against your ass; just the thin materials of your swimsuits keeping you away from what you craved. You clenched around nothing, your body throbbing to feel him where you wanted him most. 

“Fuck.” Joel cursed. “Keep making me touch you and I’ll cum in my shorts like a teenage boy.” He laughed, his hands following down the curve of your sides until he gripped at your ass roughly. 

Joel stood up behind you, you turned around to protest but he was holding his hand out for you to take it. You obliged, unsure of his plan but willing to follow him anywhere. 

“Where are we?” You asked and Joel just turned around to smirk at you. 

He led you over to the shoreline, towards a more secluded area and slowly he submerged you both into the water. The ocean came up to around your chest, you were able to stand but the waves splashed around you to hide you both well. 

“Needed to hide away from everyone, need to have my way with you.” Joel said quietly, cautious in case there were nearby people. 

“We are not fucking in the ocean.” You laughed ludicrously. 

“Why not? You scared, princess?” Joel smirked, his hands held your hips strongly as you both bobbed with the motion of the sea. “Thought you wanted me?”

“I swear to god, Miller if I get a UTI from this, you’ll be the one that’s paying for the prescription to sort me out.” You rolled your eyes and let your hand cup at Joel’s still hard member, your fingers squeezed his length and he let out a low groan. 

“Come here and kiss me.” Joel said softly, holding the back of your head to land a bruising kiss to your mouth; his lips moved dominantly against yours, you were entirely at his will as he kissed you. 

You wrapped your legs around Joel’s waist, the water making you almost weightless and your hands gripped either side of his face to kiss him deeper. Your tongue dipped into his mouth and you whimpered as you tasted him for the first time, you had craved him for so long. His rough facial hair scratched at the skin of your face and you relinquished the sting as his tongue fought against yours. 

Joel reached a hand down between you both, his awkwardly pulled his member free in the water and yanked your bikini bottom to the side so he could push himself into your wet hole. He held both your hips once more and used them as leverage to bring your body down until you were fully seated onto his cock. You pulled away from the kiss to rest your forehead against his, a breathless gasp falling from your kiss-swollen lips. 

“F-fuck,” you whimpered, your arms looping around Joel’s neck to hold him weakly as he built up a steady rhythm of you bouncing onto his dick. 

To any passers-by you would both be seen cuddling, bobbing in the current of the ocean; just a sweet moment between a loving couple. The thrill of potentially being caught made your body ache and you fluttered your walls around Joel as you somewhat awkwardly worked yourself onto his cock. 

“So tight, never wanna leave you. Should stay buried in your pretty cunt, need you warming my cock forever.” Joel mumbled against your lips.

You couldn’t help but blush at his words, your hands clawed gently at his bare shoulders as Joel nudged his cock against the bundle of nerves buried deep in your walls. You could already feel your stomach bubble with your impending orgasm, you knew you needed to be quick as to not arouse suspicions if your father awoke from his nap. 

“Joel,” you whined quietly, your head still lulling against Joel’s forehead. “God I wish we were somewhere more stable so you could fuck me as rough as I deserve.” You whispered, lips tickling against Joel’s sun-kissed skin. 

Joel let out a breathy laugh as his large hands pawed at the doughy flesh of your ass. He groaned softly as held onto you and pushed his hips up harder and faster. 

“We need to speed this up, baby girl. Don’t want your daddy questioning where we are, do we?” He whispered. “Dip your hand down and play with your clit, need you to cum at least once before we go back.” 

You bit your lip as Joel manoeuvred your hips below the water, you bucked your hips forward as Joel’s thick cock filled you deliciously and you pushed your hand into your bikini bottoms. Your delicate fingers nimbly circled your clit and you gasped loudly, the sensations building throughout your body. 

“Please tell me you’ll fuck me again?” You asked, eyes pleading with the older man as your fingers moved faster. “Fuck, need you again and again and again.” You moaned, the noise louder than initially intended. 

Joel groaned and nodded as he brought your hips down again roughly, the water still slowing his motions. “I’ll fuck you whenever you want, princess. Whatever you want.”

“I-I’m gonna —“ you whimpered, your voice dying off as a high-pitched whimper fell from your lips. 

You clenched around Joel, your spongy walls gripping his cock like he had never had before and he moaned gruffly. 

You removed your fingers from your clit and you knew Joel was close by the way his cock was twitching as he thrust into you again. You giggled as you reached under the fabric of your bikini top and released your tits from the refraining fabric. Your soft mounds bobbed in the water but it was enough to push Joel over the edge. 

He came quickly, holding you in place to take every last drop of him and in that moment, you were grateful that the ocean would at least help you somewhat freshen up before you headed back. Your name fell from Joel’s lips softly as he clumsily thrust up a couple more times before his head fell forward to rest on your chest so he could suck in a few deep breaths. 

“Please never put your top back on, it’s a crime against humanity that you cover your body up.” He laughed, his chest still heaving with the effort. 

You rolled your eyes with a fond giggle and finally unlatched your legs from around Joel’s hips. You redid up your bikini top and ensured your bottoms were on correctly before starting to swim off away from Joel. 

You reached the sand once again and began walking back to the spot where your dad was still snoozing. 

“Meet me tonight.” Joel whispered, his hand resting on the small of your back. 

“What?” You asked, looking back at him as you continued to walk. 

“Come to mine tonight, let your dad fall asleep and I’ll come and pick you up. You’ll be back before he knows. I need to fuck you properly.” 

You nodded, not trusting your shaking voice to speak. 

“And for now, enjoy the feeling of my cum slowly leaking from you for the rest of the afternoon and evening. I’ll clean you up later, I promise.” He smirked, running ahead of you to go back to laying down on his towel. 

You sat down and picked your book back up, pretending you had any interest in the words on the page in front of you. 

-

-

[baocean]

NOT INTERESTED - JJ MAYBANK

Summary: your friends have been trying to set you and JJ up all summer, they just don’t know one tiny detail

Pairing: JJ x pogue!reader

Warnings: none

“Kie, how many times will it take to get it through your head that I’m not interested?” You groaned, turning away from her.

She followed you off the porch of the chateau. “Cmon, just think about it. You and JJ have so much in common. It would be like…like a power couple.”

“No. Not a chance.”

Kiara had been going on about you and JJ all summer, Pope, John B, and Sarah too. Trying to push JJ and you together.

They had fifty bucks that the two of you would start dating by the time school started. Someone was going to be broke.

You joined the boys and Sarah over on the dock, Kie following swiftly behind.

“So?” John B asked Kie once she sat down, out of breath.

“I got nothing, but I’m not giving up.” She said, giving you a smug look. Your friends laughed. JJ and you exchanged an annoyed expression.

“Maybe y’all should just give up. I’m not even sure y/n here likes boys.” JJ spoke, slinging his arm up and over the wood.

Your mouth fell open and you flipped him off, rolling your eyes as he laughed.

He was right though, while the other pogues were flirting with anyone and everyone, you were off with, well, JJ.

“I like boys. Just not you, JJ.”

“Oh, that explains all the guys you get.”

“Not like you’re getting any action either, pretty boy.” You gave him a wicked smile, letting him know that two could most definitely play at that game.

“Oh, I am certainly getting action.” His head tipped to the side. You grimaced.

“Gross, dude.” Pope groaned, shaking his head.

It was quiet for a minute, just you and JJ looking at each other, with your friends surrounding.

“Would you look at the time? We’ve got to go!” Sarah looked at her phone, pulling John B up with her, Kie and Pope following suite.

You rolled your eyes again, peaking over at JJ. He wasn’t even trying to hide the smirk that was painted across his face.

As your friends giggled and ran off the dock, JJ chuckled. He scooted closer to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

“Now that we’re alone,” He trailed off, leaning in.

“JJ, our friends are right there.” You turned and pointed towards one of the big trees in John B’s backyard.

Sure enough, four pairs of eyes were staring back at us, disappearing once you two looked their way.

“But babe, I haven’t kissed you all day.” JJ whined. He threw his head on your shoulder in protest.

“You’re the one that came up with that stupid plan.” You told him.

JJ and you had already been dating since last summer, but it wasn’t something we planned on telling your friends anytime soon.

For half of your relationship, you two were pretty much terrified of telling your friends that you were dating, afraid of what it would do to the group. So you and JJ kept it a secret.

When you realized our friends were trying to set you up with your boyfriend at the end of the school year, your relationship turned into a game of how long could you go until your friends found out. JJ had come up with the plan.

“Baby, just one kiss. One peck, that’s it.” He tried again, leaning up to look you.

He peaked down at your lips as he smiled, knowing you were gonna give in soon enough.

You guys had pretty much lasted all summer without your friends catching on. You sort of wanted to fool them until the first day of school.

“No, J. You decided until the end of summer and then we’d tell them. Who am I to go against your plan?” You gave him a sweet, sick smile.

You suggested you tell your friends the second you found out they weren’t going to be mad. JJ had other plans.

“I’m overruling this plan. Let’s make out right now.” He pulled you into his lap in a swift second and placed his hands loosely on your legs.

“JJ-,” You laughed as he cut you off with a kiss.

JJ’s kisses were like your drug, because you couldn’t remember how long you were kissing his lips and neck before your friends ran back down the dock.

Kie got there first, screaming as the two of you pulled apart.

“I just won fifty bucks!” She yelled, throwing her hands in the air. Pope and John B shook their heads, watching Kie dance. Sarah was leaning against John B, giving you a smug look.

“I dunno, babe. Should we just pretend this is our first kiss?” JJ grinned at you as you slid off his lap. He stood up with you, standing behind you and linking his arms around your shoulders.

Kie’s smile dropped, along with her hands. “What the fuck did you just say?”

The rest of your friends looked just as confused as Kie did.

“No, nothing.” JJ played it off, placing his head on yours.

“We’ve been dating since last year.” You spoke over your boyfriend, slightly annoyed by his game playing.

It looked like Pope’s eyes were going to fall out of his head. John B and Sarah shared a confused expression.

“Huh?” Was all Kie could muster. You looked at your bestfriends, certain that your boyfriend behind you was sharing the same look you were.

“So does that mean we win the fifty bucks? It would be great for the date we have planned tomorrow night.” JJ joked.

…..

[beababoobies]

Oh my stars so I saw your post for Hazbin hotel requests can I PLEASE get a reader w Sir Pentious who is low-key jealous of his crush on cherry but he ends up getting w reader in the end?

I would love you forever 🙏

yurp, I gotchu. I love cherpentious with my entire heart but anything for y’all 🫡

edit : THERE IS NOW A PART TWO!

Somethin’ Stupid - Sir Pentious

words : 1.77k, slight warning for ep 6 stuffs

God, this fucking sucked. 

Cherri, who was - and you don’t mean to be direct, or self-loathing - downright fucking gorgeous, had been bribed to take you all out to a bar - well no, that wasn’t the exact instructions, but it was clear enough that Charlie didn’t expect much more from her. So here you were, slouched back on a vodka-stained couch in the corner of this bar, Husk lounging beside you while Nifty giggled and played with his fur, and your oh so beloved Sir Pentious across from you. 

You kicked back another shot of whatever Angel had brought to you, pretending to find whatever Husk had just said funny (you were far too caught up in the way Sir Pentious was goo goo eyeing a certain Cherri Bomb.) and Husk spoke up, eyebrows furrowed. 

“What’s up your ass today, kid?” He said flatly with a swig of his beer, raising one of his eyebrows as you finally snapped your attention back to him, trying to smile non-chalantly as you watched your beloved little drunken ball of insecurity slither towards Cherri again from the corner of your eye. “ ‘ts nuthin, Husk. Leave it.” You say with an annoyed sigh as you watch Pentious stumble over his words to an annoyed and unimpressed Cherri. 

“- I’M HAVING SSSSEX WITH EVERYONE HERE!” He turns around and yells, which has both Nifty, Angel, and Husk snap their heads around with wide eyes. He gives you a sad look and you try to give him a reassuring one. That is until he gets dragged into a separate room, and you inhale sharply through your teeth, wincing at the way he screams before the door is shut properly. Cherri doesn’t even look like she cares. 

“Ah.” Husk says flatly, catching your attention again. “Should’ve guessed after your fuckin’ ramble last night. ‘But Husk he doesn’t even know I’m here!’ and all those fuckin’ ‘I’ve been here longer than he has and he won’t even talk to me!‘s. he’s just nervous around you, like he is with Cherri. Fucker has some self-confidence issues. Just do it already.” He says, looking almost annoyed as you flushed deep and slapped your hand over his mouth, which he quickly swatted away. 

“Shh! Jesus fucking Christ Husk, not so loud! Fuck!” You grumble as Angel giggles with a hand over his mouth from the other end of the booth, before taking another small sip of his cocktail. “Not a secret, toots.” He says with his casually shit-eating grin, gesturing to a very drunk Nifty who was giggling now too, nodding her head. Great. 

“Sometimes, when I’m out killing the bugs that think they’re all sneaky, and gross and cool at night, I walk past your room and you’re listening to super bad romance music. Which scares the bugs away and makes them surrender their lives. Which like, it’s supposed to be a fight! You’re ruining all the fun… ” She adds the last part with a annoyed grumble, but despite her unbelievably drunken state, she’s still speaking fast, high-pitched, and with the exact same creepy undertones. “And I walk past that bad boys room and he’s all rehearsing romance poetry he wrote. It’s so bad! Ehehe!” 

She giggles out, eyes falling on a bug on the floor, hopping quickly off of Husker’s head and falling face first onto the floor, before quickly picking herself back up and running after it. “Shit.” Angel groans, putting his cocktail down quickly and shuffling out of the booth. “I’m gonna make sure she doesn’t end up with some creep.” He grits out through his teeth, before disappearing into the crowd with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I’d better help him out.” Husk says with a sigh as well as he placed his beer bottle down carefully, pulling himself up with a groan.

He turns back to you for a second, just looking over his shoulder, before smiling. “You should start considering the possibility of Cherri being a distraction.” He says, humming softly before he adds one last thing. “Please do check in on the awkward fucker though, I don’t know what kind of shit he’s got stuffed in him or is stuffing at the fuckin moment.” Husk says with a sigh, disappearing right into the ground of flashing lights and bumping bodies right after Angel. 

You took the last courage swig of your drink and stood up, doing a little tipsy stretch as you got up, before dejectedly walking over to where a very, very exhausted Sir Pentious was sitting, hyperventilating and sweaty. You let out a soft sigh as you walked over, kneeling in front of him and taking his hands away from his face, holding them softly in your hands, looking up at him with furrowed brows and concern.

“Hey Pentious, that was a lot wasn’t it?” You say softly and he nods, refusing to make eye contact with you. He looks grossed out, ashamed, everything. You let out a soft sigh and rub small circles into the back of his palm with your thumb, doing your best to comfort him in the loud and overstimulating bar scene. 

“They were very kind - I jusssst, kept ssssssaying yessss. I don’t know why.” He says softly, and you nod, standing up and helping him up too. “Let’s get you back to the hotel, ‘Kay? You can take a nice hot shower and go to bed.” You reassure quietly and he finally looks up from the ground, smiling at you quickly before nodding, but as soon as Angel catches his gaze again, he’s out of your grips and right back to focusing on Cherri. You grimace softly as you watch him rush up to angel and ask where Cherri is. You watch as he groans in defeat as she goes into another room with a random guy. 

Some part of you feels happy, relieved of some jealousy. Another part of you feels bad. That was all he was doing the entire night, trying to get her attention. You shook it off and walked over to where everyone had re-grouped, giving them a tired wave, and getting one in return. You let out a small gasp as you saw the dried blood from Angels’ nose all the way down or his lip, his new black eye. 

“Oh dear, what happened?” You cooed softly, reaching up to wipe some of the blood of his face, and he softly moved away, shaking his head in a polite ‘thank you, but not right now’ way, and you nodded. “It was just a run-in with Val.” He says with a sigh, wiping another fresh stream of blood from his other nostril onto the back of his hand. “Let’s get going - I’ll tell you when we’re back at the hotel, Toots.” 

An unceremonious end to the night; but not exactly the end to yours. Even when you got back, debriefing everything that happened with Husk and Angel while Nifty snored on the couch and Pentious took a shower, even when you had finally wished them a good night and made your bed, sighing as you let your head fall to your pillow, you couldn’t stop thinking about what happened with him. What Husk had said. 

“You should start considering the possibility of Cherri being a distraction.”

You repeated it in your head for hours while you tried to think about anything else, scrolling on your phone aimlessly through Hellflix, InstaScam, Crime Video, even YouCrude - there was no one to e-stalk, no new shows for you to binge, not even something you wanted to re-watch. No new uploads from your faves - just an endless amount of scrolling. 

Until about 3 a.m.

That’s when you heard it - shaky, nearly silent sobs from Pentious’s room, small sniffles. You checked the time, sighed, threw a shitty pair of smiley-face PJ pants Charlie had made for you on, and slumped over to his bedroom, knocking softly on his door. It went dead silent, not a mouse, no the small clinking or squishing of Nifty’s bug-killing sewing needle. 

“Who issss it?” He said in a shaky, tired, raw voice, and your heart absolutely melted, hand against the doorknob as you spoke. “It’s me, Pentious. I just heard you - uh - being sad. I know I’m not your favourite, but can I come in?” You say with a soft sigh, running your fingers through your hair tiredly. It takes him a minute and a soft hiccup before he rasps out a small “pleasssse, y-yeah.” And you open the door.

What you find is absolutely heartbreaking. Your favourite little serpent, curled in on himself, hugging his tail to himself, eyes red with tears that fall softly down his face, hat resting on his old worn down dresser, angry and frustrated swipes if his claws leaving him on top of torn up bedsheets and pillows, and you nearly cry with him right then and there. This sweet man who has been nothing but a pure angel, stuck with all the sinners, including yourself, down here. 

You walked over to him, sitting beside him on his bed, hearing the old mattress frame squeak softly as you sat down, putting your hand on his, gently cooing him until he took big, deep breaths, gently and encouragingly rubbing circles back into the palm of his hand.

“Tell me, what’s up? I’m all -“ you start confidently, being cut off by an annoyed but desperate call from Pentious himself, pulling his hand away from yours and groaning into his palms, shaking his head. “that ISSSSS the problem! You’re the problem-  you’re so pretty I can’t think sssstraight around you! And now you think I hate you!” He cries out, looking at you with desperate eyes, like he wants you to say something - anything, really. But you really can’t.

You’re completely frozen, hand frozen in mid air when it was going to rest on his shoulder to comfort him, eyes wife, lips pierced together and all you can do is stare at him like some stupid idiot. You are at a mental battle of grabbing his face and kissing him until you can’t breathe or slowly talking it out. He sighs dejectedly.

“I want to get closssser to you. Wanted to be your friend, at leassst. But… then I’d go and ssssspoil it all by ssssaying ssssomething sssstupid like…” he stops for a second, swallowing thickly. “…I love you.” He looks up at you again, nearly desperate for an answer. You finally get some words out of your closed up throat -

“I love you.” 

~

Frank + Nancy Sinatra My Beloveds &lt;;3

[herbirdglitter]

ok send help. I found this reddit post with a bunch of links to a ton of really cool articles on asexuality and resources and that kind of thing (X) but OH MY GOD. I’M DYING. One of them was a link to an article on what sexual attraction actually feels like (X) and NOOOOOO JUST NOOOOO PEOPLE ARE JUST WALKING AROUND LIKE THIS??? Y’ALL ARE CRAZY

Edit: for fucks sake, stop being so mean in the comments. I know what I said but people who experience sexual attraction are not crazy, nor are they gross. I was merely trying to illustrate how foreign these feelings are to me. Trust me, I understand what you’re saying, I don’t have a sex drive and I’m sex repulsed, but try and be decent human beings PLEASE. The allos are lovely. Sex is beautiful. I’m beautiful. Which wasn’t really up for debate but it’s worth mentioning

[whoreforchr1s]

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒

bf!chris sturniolo

a/n: y’all please give me one-shot suggestions🙏🙏

- HUGEEEE pda guy like he wants his hands on you 24/7, whether thats on your waist, you hands, you thighs or even your back, it doesn’t matter. expect this man’s hands to be GLUED to you.

- compliments all the time! even if your sick and look disturbingly gross, he would still think you are the most beautiful human to walk this planet, and he will always tell you that.

- he defo gets jealous easily but trusts you with his whole heart

- you guys are just literally bestfriends in a relationship. i dont know if this makes sense, but y’all literally laugh at anything and just get along so well!

- he acts all tough but he has a HUGE soft spot for you.

- he honestly doesn’t like pet names, but ‘ma’ is an exception. He calls you ma ALLLLL the time, but nothing else. Not babe, not baby, nothing! but if you call him babe or baby, he loves it. But he’ll just stick to ‘ma’

- morning 🪵 pretty much everyday.

- protects you all the time from haters. if you get hate, he will be replying to every comment/ message that he sees. even if you tell him it doesn’t bother you, he doesn’t care, no one is gonna hate on his girl.

- back to the pet names, when talking to other people like his friends or just random people, he always labels you as ‘his girl.’

‘oh sorry, i’m going with my girl’

‘i gotta go find my girl’

- matt and nick always tease him about sappy stuff he has done for you/ said to you.

- he’s defo the type of guy that pretends to hit it from the back when you bend over to get something.

- he’s low-key a freaky bitch..

- whenever you are in a short skirt or dress in public, he always walks behind you so no creeps can stare at you.

- ass guy. i think alot of people agree that chris is an ass guy, of course, but my man loves soke boobs too. Like he loves grabbing and slapping your ass, and loves backshots, but honestly when your wearing a low neck shirt, he can’t help but stare..

- if you’re a reader, he will always ask about your books and what is happening in your current read, he has no idea what your saying but he just loves to hear you talk about something your so passionate about.

- he finds it hard to say no to you, you wanna do his makeup? sure thing! wanna get a cat? okay! no problem!

- he loves complimenting you. He knows that sometimes you are a bit self-conscious, but he will do everything in his power to make sure you know how beautiful you are. because, you are the prettiest person he has ever laid his eyes on.

masterlist!

[lookingoutforstarrs]

nsfw alphabet with hamzah!

cw: uh like everything very nsfw

aftercare- biiiiig aftercare man. he makes sure you’re all good and gets you water. he needs to be HELDDD loves to just lay in your arms after the deed. eventually falls asleep from you rubbing his back

body part- his favorite body part of his is probably his arms. he loves when you hold onto his biceps, it makes him feel all manly lol

he doesn’t really have a favorite for you, he loves it all lol. lives your thighs and hips and if you workout he looooooves your muscles. thinks they’re really hot.

cum- LOVES to cum in you and watch it drip out (slight breeding kink lols) but if you’re not using birth control then definitely in your mouth or on your stomach.

dirty secret- steals your panties. this man is a perv 100% and will steal your panties to jerk off to them. and he acts all surprised when you notice that some pairs have gone missing. he be all like “whaaaat thats wiiilddddd”

experience- he had never had sex before you. he had kissed one girl in high-school but nothing after that so you have to break him in a little

favorite position- looves when you ride him. like lives for it. but if you’re tired that day he doesn’t mind missionary!

goofy- tries to be to calm his own nerves but it just comes across like he’s nervous (which he most definitely is). depends on the day really. if yall are drunk/stoned he is really goofy. always giggling.

hair- he’s well groomed. very conscious about it at first but then he knows you dont rlly care. he doesnt care how shaven you are as long as he gets some ass lol

intimacy- again, he starts off goofy but then hes like “oh they fr want to fuck me” and he locks in😭😭 loves for you to look him in the eye while riding him. also loves to make out while feeling each other up.

jack off- he jerks off regularly but then he meets you and he’s horny 24/7 so he does it wayyyy more often. even before y’all start dating he’s thinking of you and touching himself :((

kink- biiiiiiiiiiig praise kink, but mostly receiving. he needs to be told he’s making you feel good, it makes him 10000% hornier.

location- preferably the bedroom but doesn’t mind car sex. he likes watching the windows fog up lolz

motivation- anything you do. like anything. but usually its when he sees you concentrating on one thing really hard, he pictures that you’re looking at him like that and it gets him all hot and bothered

NO- no gross shit. also doesn’t like tying you down or restricting you.

oral- he’s a munch and i will die on this hill. i’ve said this before but he could spend hours between your thighs. he gets off on it. when he gets head though he’s a crier 100%. constant rambling because it feels too good to keep quiet.

pace- you have to go slow with him the first couple of times so he doesn’t cum too fast :((. it all depends on how fast you want to go tho! he will hang on the edge for hours just for you.

quickie- not big on them. prefers that you take your time

risk- he will freak the freak out if someone catches him subbing. needs people to think he’s manly.

stamina- needs a lil break after but can do 4-5 rounds a night. again, he will sit between your legs for years so he only stops when you’re ready.

toy- loves when you use your vibrator on him. he never thought it would feel so good. also the pervy part of him likes to watch you use it on yourself

unfair- he’s not much of a tease, he’ll give you what you want when you want it. but he loooooves when you tease him.

volume- LOUD. constantly rambling nonsense and cant keep quiet. whimpers when you tease him and MOAAAAANNNNNSSS.

wild card- loves dry humping SO MUCH.

x-ray- a good 6-7 inches. not too much not too little, and he knows how to use it

yearning- he is always ready to fuck dude. before yall start dating he wants you so bad it physically hurts

ZZZ- like i said for the aftercare part, he makes sure you’re taken care of then falls asleep in your arms.

[s-4pphics]

ellie's a sub :3

and is. ive been envisioning her in cat ears so i wrote it kinda i miss writing lol hi btw lol

ellie in cat ears omg 

when you bring it up for the first time she gets so fucking shy she’s like “…huh?” but her eyes are getting all wide n glossy

literally 🥺

y’all were literally on the couch watching chronicles of narnia and now she’s horny like what😐 edmond just got kidnapped by the white witch—

she starts fiddling with her thumbs and kinda shies away from saying anything until shes 100% clear on what the fuck you just said

and you’re just like can you gimme head with kitty ears on? they’re upstairs! you’ll look so cute! :D

she nearly passes out… falls to her knees…. starts crying and praising the gods for sending you her way… nasty slut

you’re smiling so bright at your own proposal 

before you lean into her, your eyes devilish—sinister before you whisper against the side of her face

be a good kitty’n make me squirt? 

you lick up her ear for emphasis and she melts

her breaths are so heavy and her clit is throbbing in her shorts

the walk upstairs and into your bedroom was tortuous for her

she looked like a nervous virgin about to get plowed for the first time… she’s shaking in her boots fr😞

and when you dig around in your underwear drawer for them…. she’s holding her own wrist so tight while she watches you work

until you pull out a pretty set of fluffy pink kitty ears with decorative bows and ruffles on the band 

you turn when you hear a thud and see… oh

oh

ellie on her knees with her shirt thrown off onto the bed, staring up at you with glitter sparkling in her orbs 

so ready to please

so ready to fucking submit

so ready to be a good kitty for her pretty girlfriend 

you smirk and walks towards her, sensuality in your step before securing the band atop her head like a halo 

you’re so fucking wet and you know she is too 

you can almost hear her fucking purring… she’s so gross

you can feel her breathing right against your stomach as you massage the back of her head 

she hooks her fingers into your panties and slides them down slowly… teasing you…. teasing herself 

until she’s face to face with your drippy angel cunt

she’s eager enough to eat it right where you stand but you yank her soft hair back before she can lick into you 

her nails dig in your thighs so hard… sharp as needles and you shake 

you barely get the words out but when you whisper them to her she moans so fucking pretty and her head shakes in approval 

kitty’s been so good today. does she want her treat? 

[naturesapphic]

Hello! I have a request for Olivia. Maybe a situation where reader and Olivia were held hostage. Reader hasn’t been doing good since, with having to witness Olivia being tortured. All week reader would try to remain professional and nonchalant. Olivia knew when reader was masking her emotions, end of week she goes reader’s place. Reader opens the door already in a bad way as she’s been all week after work. She opens up and tells Olivia all that’s in her mind and heart, including how she has feelings for her boss. She starts to have a panic attack at her own confession.

Confession

Olivia benson x fem!reader

Warnings: mentions of kidnapping and torture, mentions of rape, hurt/comfort, cussing

~ flashback ~

You were lying on a gross marble floor with no lights around you. You tried to move around but you were restrained by something. All of a sudden, a bright light flickered on and you looked up to see Olivia on the ground tied up like you. “O-olivia?!” You called out to her and she didn’t respond. You kept calling her name until you heard a groan and Olivia trying to move around. “Olivia! Are you okay?” You asked her and she forcefully turned around and saw you on the ground tied up. “I’m fine. But are you okay?” She asked you and you looked at her as tears sprung to your eyes. “No…Olivia I’m s-scared…” you whimpered out and you saw Olivia’s eyes soften as she saw how petrified you looked right now.

“Don’t worry sweetheart. I’ll get us out of this.” She reassured you but that was soon gone when someone came into the room the both of y’all were in. “Don’t make that a promise princess.” The man laughed out as he bent down to Olivia’s face. She glared at him and he didn’t like that. He socked her in the face and you screamed out “no! Please!” He kept hitting her to “teach her some manners” and you kept screaming at him to stop but he never did, not until her face was bloody and she could barley see. You started sobbing and the man walked over to you and started kicking you in the stomach to make you stop screaming. You eventually did so he would stop kicking you and he finally did. He left the room as she gave y’all a sinister smirk which made you feel the chills all over your body.

You looked over at liv and whimpered at how badly he has beaten her. You needed to go over there, you needed to see if she was okay. Your arms and legs were tied up but you managed to lay completely on the floor and start rolling over to her. You successfully got to her and had trouble sitting up but you eventually did it. “Oh livia…” you whispered to her and you leaned down carefully and placed a gently kiss on the top of her head.

~ flashback over ~

Your thoughts were interrupted by fin calling your name, snapping you out your daydreaming, “Y/n! You alright?” He asked you and you blinked a few times to focus on the world in front of you and not memories in your mind that haunt you. “What? Oh yeah…I’m good…” you said quietly as Olivia watched you from afar, noticing how you haven’t been the same since y’all got kidnapped.

~ flashback ~

It was the next day you suppose, when someone came into the room. A scared nurse was pushed into the room and the door was immediately locked. She saw you and Olivia and rushed over to y’all. “Please do her first…” you begged her and she gave you a small nod. She cleaned up Olivia’s face and told you that she would wake up soon. You thanked her and she quickly examined you and made sure that you were alright. She told you that you will be okay, that you just had some bruising and you will be sore for a week or two. You thanked her again and a loud voice called her and she went back to the door and she went out. Someone turned off the lights and the room was pitch black, then someone turned on the heat and the both of you were covering in sweat, and this went on for who knows how long.

~ flashback over ~

You were brought back to a gun being shot near you and you quickly shot at the person who was trying to shoot you. Olivia came rushing to you with backup behind her. “Y/n! What the hell happened?” She said sternly as she grabbed your weapon from you and scanned you over to make sure that you were safe. “I-I don’t know…I blacked out…” you explained to her and she gave you a disappointing look. “You could have gotten killed!” She yelled and started massaging her head. You sighed “I’m sorry…I just got distracted but it won’t happen again.” You try to explain to her but she wasn’t having any of it. She couldn’t take the chance of someone getting hurt or worse, you getting hurt.

“Go home y/n…” she said sternly but with a hint of gentleness to it. Your eyes widen and a look of hurt crossed your face and she noticed it. It hurt her to do this to you but she didn’t have any other choice. “Please y/n go…and call me when you get home. That’s an order.” She demanded and you walked by her, hitting her shoulder on purpose as you walked home in the night. Olivia hates that she sent you home but there was no way in hell you were going to get hurt as your mind isn’t in the right headspace right now.

~ flashback ~

It feels like it’s been years since we’ve been abducted here, but in reality it’s probably only been a couple of days. Everyday we would get beat up and tortured, apparently one of the men knew Olivia. She sent this guy away for rape and child abuse and he swore he would get his revenge out for Olivia. He wasn’t going to take you but he thought y’all were together because the both of you seemed really close, so he decided to take you as well.

You were in and out of consciousness when you heard gunshots and screaming. You tried to stay awake and see what was happening but you were so sleepy… you tried to look over at Olivia but found people around her. You looked up to see munch, and fin surrounding y’all. Munch and fin helped Olivia up on her feet but she was wobbly as she was trying to walk, so munch let her use him to walk. You smiled weakly at her, knowing that she is safe now and closed your eyes, but you didn’t wake up. “No! Y/n!” Olivia screamed out and fin immediately picked your limp body in his arms and ran outside where the ambulance is.

When you woke up, you were in a hospital bed. Blinking a few times, you looked over to see Olivia wide awake in her own hospital bed beside yours. “O-Olivia…” you called out to her weakly. “Y/n…hey.” She rasped out as she smiled at you. “Did they catch the people who abducted us?” You asked her and she nodded her head yes as you sighed in relief. “It’s over now y/n”.

~ flashback over ~

You launched forward in bed and looked around the room hurriedly. It felt like your heart was beating out of your chest and you couldn’t breath. Since Olivia sent you home, you’ve been having terrible nightmares about the few days y’all were trapped. You breathed in and out slowly and focused on Olivia. She always makes you calm, especially when you have your panic attacks. She was always there since she knew how to help you as she was the only person you trusted and who could help you from it, But a sudden knock from the door made you confused and a little scared.

You got up from your bed with only in your tank top and short shorts, you walked to your front door and open it to reveal your captain. “Olivia? What are you doing here?” You asked her confused. “It’s been days y/n and you haven’t called me at all to let me know you are okay.” She explained to you and you stepped aside for her to enter your apartment. She went in and looked around your place “it’s nice. Seems comfy.” She said and you looked at her awkwardly. “Uh…thanks?” You said and she sighed. “Y/n…what’s been going on with you recently? Ever since what happened when we got kid-.” She was interrupted by the haunted look on your face as she mentioned the incident and her heart immediately broke in pieces at the look you gave her.

“Y/n….” She said and got closer to you and you whimpered out. “I-I’m sorry okay! I’m sorry I haven’t been a good detective recently! My mind won’t stop replaying the memories and moments in my head. I keep seeing you get beaten and tortured!. And while you were unconscious…he came in and raped me…h-he wouldn’t stop! He kept saying how this is going to hurt you…he thought we were together. He wanted his revenge and this was one of them!” You cried out as you kept talking. “Do you know how hard it was seeing you in so much pain? I couldn’t do anything to help you! Watching the woman I love get beaten repeatedly to the point where you were barley conscious and hearing the boys talk shit about you and how the guy who raped me said how he fucked your girlfriend.” You said and Olivia gave you a shocked look. You looked at her with a confused expression until it hit you like a bus. You just claimed to your boss that you were in love with her. Fuck.

“Oh God…I-I’m so sorry Olivia! F-forget what I s-said I-I’m sorry…” you said as you started hyperventilating. You got on your knees and was panting hard. Olivia instantly got down on the ground with you and put you in her strong arms. “Hey hey shhhh sweetheart it’s okay…” she said trying to reassure you but you just kept crying and apologizing to her. She can’t believe that you just told her that you loved her. She didn’t think you were interested let alone love her. She had her eye on you ever since y’all become friends all those years ago and now…she knows that you have the same feelings for her like she has with you.

“Y/n. Sweetheart look at me.” She softly demanded and you sniffled as you looked up in her brown eyes. “I love you too…I’ve had for years. That’s why I’m always so protective and insisting that I go with you everywhere. I’m in love with you y/f/n.” Olivia confessed to you and you swear you could pass out right then and there. “Y-you do? But what will t-the others think?” You said with a bit of worry hidden in your time. She gave you a soft smile and shook her head. “Almost everyone already knows. They see how I look and how I treat you. The only person who didn’t know was you.” She explained as you sniffled and gave her a goofy smile to which she laughed at. She rested her forehead against yours and held your body close to hers. “Will you be my girlfriend Angel?” She asked you softly and you nodded your head excitedly. “Yes of course! Captain.” You said giggling and hugging her tightly.

“Don’t worry darling. The bastards who hurt us will rot in prison for the rest of their life. That’s a guarantee on my behalf.” She reassured you and you hummed in acknowledgment as you nuzzled your face into her neck. She smiled down at you and continued to hold you in her arms.

A/n: whew, 1936 words. I hope the anon who requested this enjoys it! Remember to stay hydrated and to rest! I love y’all!

[girlboypersonthingy]

FIRST SALLY FACE POST!!! I know, I’m late to the fandom. But 🤷🏻 ya know…just some cute fluffy Sally Face headcanons about reader’s first kiss with Sal, Larry and Ash. Just can’t stop thinking about kissing them…🫠 ENJOY!

First Kiss 💋

SAL FISHER 🎸

Honestly, I think he would have wanted to kiss you the day y’all met but…his face :( he’s too worried about his face

Whether yall are dating, just friends, pining hard asf for each other…you will have to initiate the kiss.

You’ll def have to have a conversation about it first, ask his permission and prepare him for it. He’d prefer you ask him/tell him before just pouncing on him.

If you decide you want to kiss him on his prosthetic tho, LITERALLY NO NEED TO ASK, JUST. DO. IT. BABY. He’s been dyingggg to have you kiss his face, even if it’s not his skin, he still feels the kiss, feels his gut drop…feels his hands and feet become hot and tingly with excitement. Kisses over his prosthetic make him smile so hard.

When you finally do get to your first lip-to-lip, no prosthetic kiss, SALLY IS SHAKING IN HIS BOOTS. Maybe you’ve already seen his face, maybe even traced a finger along his scars before…but KISSING?!?? He’s so fucking nervous. And you are, too.

You really had to work up the courage to ask him but you finally do. It goes something like…

“Hey, uh, Sal? Can I kiss you?”

“Sure.”

“On…the lips?”

“Oh, heh. Sure.”

“……like…without your prosthetic?”

and he starts SWEATING under his prosthetic as he mumbles a shy “o-oh, okay. C-cool. I’m down.” Internally, he’s excitedly punching the air rn. Externally, he’s shaking like a leaf.

He’s honestly so worried you’ll be scared and/or grossed out by the parts of his lips and cheek that are missing and revealing his teeth. He worries he might drool on you a bit too…just praise this sweet boy after the fact, okay?

~

“Hey, uh, Sal?”

“Hm?” He responded as he fiddled with the knobs at the top of his guitar, gently plucking the strings and then twisting the knobs accordingly. It took you literally like 5 minutes of staring at him and hyping yourself up in your mind to even open your mouth and say his name. After his short response, you felt you needed another internal pep talk before you said anymore. This strange pause made Sal look over at you. He looked back to his guitar and then did a double take at you, just to make sure he actually saw you staring at him. His room became suddenly silent.

“Can I kiss you?” You finally spit it out, looking him dead in the eye as the words leave your mouth. He seems chill about it, his eyes relaxed, his shoulders slowly shrugging as he leaned back on his bed more. “Sure.”

You take a quick but deep breath, your cheeks beginning to feel hot. You could feel your blush slowly spreading. “On the lips, I mean…” He’s still keeping his eyes on you and you can tell he’s smiling a bit from the way his eyes squint and slightly wrinkle at the corners, his prosthetic covering his actual smile. “Heh, yeah. Sure, (Y/N).”

At this point, it’s almost painful how embarrassed you are and you’re sure you probably have a really stupid look on your face. Shit…this is not going as smooth as you’d like it to.

“Like……with the prosthetic off.” You say bluntly, watching for any sign of a reaction from him. His eyes fell open wider, leading you to believe he was no longer smiling, but maybe had his mouth hanging open in shock? It takes him a moment to process it and respond.

“O-oh! Right uh…c-cool. Yeah, sure.” He lets out a shaky sigh before pushing his guitar off his lap and to the side of his bed. As he reaches behind his head to unclip his prosthetic, you just watch and feel yourself becoming increasingly warm and tingly, your nerves really getting the best of you right now.

His prosthetic falls gently from his face onto his bed. He closes his eyes immediately and leans in quick, hoping you won’t look at his face too hard and change your mind. You can’t help but smile as you watch him for a second before your eyes close and you lean towards him. Your lips meet his and it’s…not what you expected at all. But in a good way! His scarred lips are actually really soft, he must put chapstick on often. And he’s so gentle. It’s just really warm and soft and sweet and the kiss is lingering but very still.

You pull back to see him smiling ever so slightly, his eyes still closed. The smile slowly becomes a frown which becomes a quivering bottom lip. Sal still has his eyes closed as he silently cries. He then spends the next few minutes very quietly telling you about the time he watched some lame romance movie with Larry and asked him if he thought someone would ever love him like that and Larry told him he totally would.

Larry was totally right.

LARRY JOHNSON 🤘🏽

Larry most definitely asked you if he could kiss you. He’s like really fucking into you but also he’s such a gentleman. He’s very considerate and would for sure ask for your consent first.

He’s probably tried to ask you at several different times but he always chickens out. He’d always start by saying your name to get your attention. Then you look at him, your expression is always one of expectation and wonder. He can’t bring himself to say what he really wants to, so it’s always like…

“Oh uh, sorry. Lost my train of thought.”

“Does it smell weird in here to you?”

*insert shitty pun here* (always makes you laugh and makes Sal groan)

You find it very cute that he says your name so often. It sounds nice paired with his small lisp.

I JUST KNOW that this boy practices what he’s gonna say to you in the mirror like literally every morning. He’ll stand at the bathroom sink, talking to himself. Most the time, he thinks he’s doing good until it dawns on him that he’s talking to himself in a mirror. Then he’ll just facepalm, sigh and continue on with his day, knowing he’s such a chicken shit.

One time, Sal was going to the basement to show Larry some cool shit he’d found on the fifth floor of the apartments and he froze just before he knocked on the bathroom door. He heard Larry, repeating the same thing over and over.

“(Y/N), can I please kiss you?”

“Please let me kiss you…”

“Would it be okay if I-“ *frustrated sigh*

Sal finds it equally hilarious and endearing to witness. He definitely didn’t tell Larry that he heard all of that tho.

Finally, one day, Larry found himself in the perfect position to finally say what he wanted. He called up the whole group and invited everyone to his place to chill. Everyone was on board…until Ash canceled to finish up some homework and Sal canceled bc he forgot he told his dad he’d be home for dinner.

A group hang out turned into a sort of date for you and Lar Bear.

~

“Damn, what a bunch of losers! How dare they blow us off for homework and family!” You jokingly declare, making Larry look over at you with a toothy grin. “No, really!” He agrees, trying to offer you a genuine smile but he…sort of feels like he has to puke right now. He’s always had a weak stomach. And you make him extra nervous.

The two of you sat in the treehouse, both sitting on the floor across from each other. The room would be silent now were it not for the heavy metal music playing lowly in the background. You didn’t feel awkward though, not at all. It was actually nice to enjoy some peace and some music with your crush friend. Larry kept looking frantically between you and his feet, his breathing speeding up as he readied himself. Right as he opened his mouth-

“Hey, I forgot I-“

“(Y/N), I wanted to-“

You both stop simultaneously and then you both start laughing. “You first.” You say in unison, making you both laugh even harder. “No no, you first, (Y/N).” He insists, holding his stomach from laughing so hard.

So you start, “I forgoootttt I got you something.” You turn and reach into the bag you brought along with you and pulled out a plastic package with a set of paint brushes inside, sliding them across the wood floor to him. “Saw these at the dollar store and thought maybe you could use some more. They’re…well, from the dollar store so they probably suck but…” You shrug and watch as he picks them up. It’s such a small simple thing but…he’s so flattered. Youre so nice. Instead of thanking you or showing any gratitude, he just…

“Can I kiss you?” And you don’t even give him an answer. You just crawl over to him and smush your lips into his. You’re smiling into the kiss, leaning forward on your hands as one of his big hands reaches up and rests on your cheek.

He brings you a painting of a pretty landscape on regular white paper the next day. He’s sure to tell you that he used the brushes you got him and that they are actually pretty good for dollar store brushes.

ASHELY CAMPBELL 💜

BITCH

This bitch

This cute, sweet, amazing little-

I’m gonna try to make hers as long as the boys but

YOU CANNOT CONVINCE ME THAT THIS BABE WOULD NOT JUST SMOOCH YOU SUDDENLY IF YALL WERE ALONE AND THE VIBE WAS RIGHT

Like what am I supposed to write for her?

She would for sure just press a fat kiss to your lips if yall were alone together one day, chilling in her room while watching a movie.

I’m sorry, she’s all for consent ofc. But…she’s pretty spontaneous and bold asf.

“It’s easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission.” That’s her! She’ll just go for it.

Kiss now, ask questions later.

If you’re chill with it, cool. Let’s…do it again maybe?

If you’re not chill with it, she’ll very sincerely apologize and ask you to totally forget about it (and pray you’ll still wanna be friends with her)

She’s also very obviously smart. She wouldn’t just kiss you if she thought you weren’t into her that way. She picks up on your hints and the way you blush and smile at things she says.

She knows you like her. She wants you to know that the feeling is mutual. 😘

So she invites you over for a movie night, tells you to bring pajamas and snacks if you want!

And then she waits until the best part of the movie, when you’re really invested in the plot and not expecting it-

She says your name in a breathy voice and as you turn your head to face her… 💋💋💋

Also doesn’t even bring it up to the boys until a couple days later. Says it very lowkey but she’s totally bragging.

~

“Oh my god. This movie is actually so sad.” You sniffled a bit as you watched the flashing colors on Ash’s TV in front of you. She laughed softly into her hand, watching you get teary eyed. “Aww, you’re such a softy, (Y/N)!” Ash nudged you playfully, making you laugh along with her.

Ash’s parents had gone to bed already and just you two were awake in her home, both curled up on the couch under the same blanket. Just being under the same blanket made you both so nervous. She kept stealing glances over at you, her smile never leaving her face. You were too into the movie to notice.

Ash pulled the blanket up on herself a bit more, the edge of it now sitting right under her chin. Her hand very slowly crept closer to yours, the whole time she was holding her breath. As soon as her pinky touched yours, you stiffened and she finally exhaled. You tried to keep your eyes on the TV and not look over at her with red cheeks, all embarrassed with heart eyes for her. But that’s exactly what she wanted.

She wrapped her pinky around yours, gently tightening the grip she had on you. Then very quickly, almost too quickly, she pulled away. You wondered what that was supposed to mean. Was that like…a flirty thing? Or a “you’re my bestie” type thing? Or a romantic thing? Or just nothing at all?

Before you could get too deep into your thoughts, she softly cleared her throat before saying your name. It wasn’t a whisper, you could clearly hear her over the TV, but her voice was so low and whispy and her breath smelled sort of minty (as if she was fully prepared for this moment).

As you turned your head, your lips brushed against hers, your noses slight bumping together. She was so still, so calm and relaxed, like she’d rehearsed this moment over and over again. You on the other hand…are taking a moment to grasp the situation here. You sort of just kissed, not fully but kind of by accident. Was that an accident or…? No, why would she be this close to you if it was an accident-

Ash is about to laugh at you and your expression but stops herself. She can tell you’re flustered and confused but also very into this. She smiles with adoration for you, her eyes nearly shut as she leans in. Okay, now you’re sure that was definitely not an accident. You suck in a breath and let your eyes fall shut just as her lips finally rest onto yours. A soft hum vibrates through her as she pushes into the kiss just a tiny bit more.

As you part, the soft kiss noise the two of you make is enough to make you both lose it. Ash is now completely hidden under the blanket, her stomach doing flips as her face continues to burn bright red. She’s laughing, you’re laughing. Finally, she speaks up from her hiding place under the covers.

“Was…that okay?” She asks, seemingly much more shy now. This makes you smile even bigger as you pull the blanket up to join her under it. “Oh yeah! Totally. I…I liked that.” She seems to perk up a bit at your reply, now looking over at you in the shadow of your blanket fort.

“We can do it again. If you want…”

[artdcnaldson]

on the topic of utis,,, just wondering how art or pat would react if you said you got a uti after having sex with them lmao i love patrick but i rlly do think that man would give me a uti

Oh absolutely. With the amount of sweaty or gross sex you’d have with Patrick, I just know that UTIs would be annoyingly frequent.You text him and tell him you have a UTI and he just texts back an Apple Pay for $10 and a screenshot of ocean spray cranberry juice. Just absolutely vile and evil like breakup worthy.

Art would scream cry and throw up bc he feels guilty. It happens once and he never forgets. The second y’all finish fucking he’s like “You should probably go pee btw <3” Sweet little angel

[somanyratsinthewalls]

Kinktober Special Part 4

Mo’s Kinktober Special 

The Crew’s Whore (Part 4) (+18)

Summary: You are the former owner of the Grand Line’s most popular brothel. Your power fighting abilities got the attention of the captain of the Straw Hat Pirates. He had asked you to join their crew but what would you bring to the team? Your battle skills were hardly comparable to many of the other Straw Hats… but you actually had a great skill. Your years working as a high end escort had prepared you to become the private plaything for this pirate crew. You joined the Straw Hats as their personal sex toy.

Pairing: Usopp x afab!reader

WC: 3200 ehehehe

TW's: Alcohol consumption, cowgirl, face sitting, oral sex m receiving, blowjob, a little exhibitionism, virginity loss, virgin usopp :( , oral sex f receiving, pet names, begging, submissive usopp :(

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Chapter 4: The Liar

——

Earlier in the Day…

Zoro, Sanji and Usopp sat side by side on the railing of the deck watching their fishing poles in the water. The stores of meat were getting a little on the low side, and the whole crew knew what a nightmare their captain would be if there was a shortage of food, so it was all hands on deck for fishing duty. 

“So I had y/n in the bathroom the other day, it was insane.” Zoro starts after several long minutes of silence and no bites on the hooks.

“Yeah, I KNOW.” Usopp snaps back at the mention of what he walked in on a few days ago. 

“Haha oh yeah, I forgot about that.” Zoro chuckled and leaned back on his arm. “Sorry I’m not sorry, you were bound to see it some time. I don’t know why you don’t just have her for yourself for once, you’d understand it then. Oh wait, you’re too chicken shit.” 

“Chicken shit? Oh sorry I RESPECT women, and whatever configuration you had her in was NOT respectful.” Usopp shot back at the swordsman. 

“Oh yeah? Then why was she cummin’ all over the floor? Seemed pretty respectful to me.” Zoro smirked.

“He has a point, moss head. You obviously have no idea how to truly, romantically, pleasure a woman.” Sanji didn’t even turn his head to insult Zoro. 

“At least I’m not in there whimpering and begging! You think you’re quiet? It’s gross, shitcook, be a real man.”

Sanji stood up, abandoning his fishing pole, his right ankle beginning to flame. 

“Oh you want to fucking go, asshole?”

Zoro stands up to unsheathe a single sword. 

“Anytime, curly fuckface.”

“You guys really suck, man, I hope y’all know that.” Usopp sighed and grabbed his fishing pole to move it to the opposite side of the ship. He plants his pole against the railing as he lets Sanji and Zoro’s yelling fade into the background.

“HEY BROS? I SPECIFICALLY SAID NO DIABLÉ ON THE SHIP! CUT IT OUT!” Franky’s booming voice came from the top deck as he interrupted the idiots’ argument. 

Usopp thought about what Zoro said… he wasn’t chicken shit…

— —-

That Same Day, Much Later

This evening aboard the Thousand Sunny, the weather was warm and quite breezy. As per usual there was a large spread for dinner that Sanji had expertly prepared, and the alcohol was certainly flowing. You sat in between Luffy and Usopp, your ear drums basically exploded from the decibel of their laughing and story telling. 

“-And if I wasn’t there, that old lady AND her cat would have DIED!” Usopp was regaling the crew with some ridiculous story about a walnut tree that had been set on fire back in Syrup Village. Was it true? Absolutely not. Was he adorable? Of course. 

Luffy was laughing his ass off, believing every word. 

“Wow Usopp! You’re a real hero! I bet Mr. Snuggles owes you his life!” Luffy said between bouts of laughter. 

You giggled before you leaned in and poked the tip of Usopp’s nose, teasingly.

“You’re so cute, you know that?” You chuckled at him. 

“I.. uh…” Usopp stuttered out before quieting down, his cheeks flushed a dark red. Luffy, oblivious, picked the conversation up again, telling a story about a cat he accidentally tried to eat during his childhood with the bandits. 

After everyone had their fill of food and drink, the crew each returned to their own respective tasks and business. You hung in the galley for awhile, drinking another glass of wine and drying dishes for Sanji. He was always such a good boy for you, why not help him out?

One finishing your task, you gave Sanji a peck on the cheek, to which he fussed and fawned over you briefly, and you grabbed another glass of wine before heading down the stairs towards your room. With airy steps and chardonnay in your hand, you treaded down the hall towards the bedrooms. Before you turned the corner you heard something. A beautiful melody was being played somewhere nearby and it caught your ear. You decided to follow the enchanting sound to the door of the lounge and you pushed it open. 

Inside, Brook was playing a gorgeous tune on the piano alone. You smiled seeing him so happy and in his element. You sauntered over to the piano bench and sat down next to the large skeletal man. He notices you next to him and slows his playing to a softer volume. 

“Oh beautiful y/n! How nice of you to join me! Any requests?” 

“No, this is great. What you’re playing is lovely, please continue.” You sip your wine and close your eyes, enjoying the soft notes from the piano keys. Brook finishes his song and you clap your other hand to the wine glass gently to mimic applause. 

“Bravo, Bone Daddy.” You smile. You continue, “You know… I am sorry that you can’t… you know…” 

“Oh, don’t worry sweet y/n. It’s quite alright, it’s the thought that counts, right? Yohoohoho!”

“Hmm… I guess you’re right… Here.” You stand up from the piano bench and slide out. You hike your thumbs underneath your short, black pleated skirt. You grab the edge of your pink lace panties and pull them down to your ankles and step out of them. You grab your panties and fold them up nicely. You grab one of Brook’s skeletal hands and place the panties in them and close it up. “Keep em. My treat.”  You wink and you turn to walk out of the lounge. As you leave you hear unintelligible thanks spill from Brook’s bony mouth, saying he would cherish them as long as he lived (too bad he was already dead). 

You chuckled to yourself as you closed the door to the lounge behind you. You realize your glass was once again empty, so you returned to the galley to fill it. You poured another full glass of wine before heading out to the deck again. It was quiet, but you notice Usopp sitting on the deck fiddling with his slingshot and some sort of supplies from his bag. 

“Well hey there,” You holler at him from across the deck and begin to saunter towards him. 

“Oh, hey y/n. What are you doing out here?” Usopp doesn’t look up from his project. 

“Just hanging out. Though I’d enjoy this nice weather.” You walk towards the railing of the ship and lean forward on it. 

“Yeah it is nice out, hey if you go back in for another drink could you grab me a-“ Usopp looks up towards you facing outwards towards the sea. You were leaned over the railing and the wind was blowing your skirt up over your ass. Having taken off your panties, your bare cunt and cheeks were on full display for him. 

Usopp instinctively jumped up and moved his body behind yours to cover you. Although there was no one else on the deck, he thought to immediately shelter your most intimate bits from any prying eyes.  You felt him behind you and shot up. 

“Usopp…” You ask as you turn yourself around to face him, chests almost touching. 

“Y/n! What the hell are you doing? You…” He whispers and looks around, “you don’t have any panties on!” He very quietly but very harshly breaths out at you. 

You giggle. 

“Oh, that? Yeah. Does it bother you, Usopp? You don’t like seeing my pussy on the deck like this?” You tease him as you step closer to him, bringing your breasts to press against his torso. 

“No I mean I never said- I mean no! Wait yes I mean yes! Hold on, no, no I don’t dislike it I just-…” His brain was fried as if he just stuck his finger in an electrical socket. He could feel your nipples through your tight crop top. 

“Ohhh… so you DO like it?” You purr at him.

“YES obviously, yes it’s great I mean-“ He stutters as you wrap your hands around his neck. You pull him closer to you and you gently press your lips against his to shut up him. He freezes. It took at least a full 30 seconds for him to start kissing you back. Usopp finally gathers the courage to place his hands on your waist as you kiss him deeply. You pull back, holding the side of his face with one hand, looking into his nervous eyes. 

“Would you like to take me back to your room, Usopp?” You seductively ask. He blinks blankly at you. He wasn't chicken shit. He grabs your hand and pulls you quickly through the ship to his room. 

Closing the door behind you, you wrap your arms around him again, consuming him in another heavy make out session. You could feel his hands on your body shaking. 

“Nervous, sweetheart?” You pull back and coo at him. 

“Ha, nervous? Nah, no never. I do this all the time! You know I used to have a girlfriend back in Syrup Village, she was basically a princess and she and I-“ You press your finger to his lips. 

“We both know that’s bullshit.” You smirk at him. You trace your finger along his lips. “You’ve never touched a woman in your life. Never felt the hot, wet mouth of a woman on your cock. You’ve never tasted the sweet release of a pretty girl on your tongue. You’ve never felt the tight squeeze of a cunt while you’re deep inside of it.” 

Usopp whimpers at your filthy words. You snake your left hand in between your bodies to palm him over his overalls. 

“Shit- okay fine. You got me. I have no idea what I’m doing. I want to make you feel good but I.. I don’t know how…” 

“Then let me show you…” You push his body back towards the bed making him flop onto it. You slunk in between his knees  and removed his clothes. You slipped out of your shirt over your head and your skirts down your legs, not needing to remove your panties since you had already gifted them to your Bone Daddy earlier. His cock was so painfully hard already, it bobbed angrily in front of your face as you pulled down his coveralls. 

“Are you gonna… what are you gonna do?” Usopp asks you anxiously. “well… nothing you don’t want, okay sweetheart? I was going to take you in my mouth… if that’s alright my sweet boy?” You settle yourself between his thighs and start to stroke his cock slowly. 

“Yes… I-I want to be in your mouth please…” He stares intently down at you, hypnotized by your beauty and eagerness. 

“Hmm…” You hum as you slowly lave your tongue over the hot mushroom tip of his cock. 

“Holy shit y/n-!” 

You felt your cunt grow wet at the desperate sounds of pleasure that came from his mouth. You wanted to ruin him so bad. A loud whine escaped Usopp’s mouth as you took his full length down your throat. You brought your right hand up to cup his tight, heavy balls in your palm. 

Usopp’s thighs and abs tense as you continue to work him in your mouth and your hands. Nothing but moans and heavy breaths left his lips. He had never felt anything like this before, cursing himself for being too… well chicken shit, to ask for your services before now. 

“Y/n wait stop I’m going to-“

You used your left hand to grab his hip and press his body further into you as you took his cock in your mouth so far that your nose met him pelvis. Usopp whined as he released his heavy load down your throat. After several more ropes shot into your mouth, you pulled off Usopp’s dick as he flopped down back on the bed. 

“Woah… I kinda get what Sanji’s been talking about now…” Usopp uttered as he stared at the ceiling. You chuckled as you snaked your body up his chest to give him a peck on the nose. 

“What can I say? I’m a professional.” You cupped his face in your hand and winked at him. His expression changed. 

“Wait… What about you?” Usopp looked up at you with concerned eyes. “Oh sweetie don’t you worry about that!.” You stroked his cheek. 

“No… I said I wanted to make you feel good… can you… can you help me? Show me?” He desperately grabbed at your hips, grinding you down onto his cock that was already starting to harden again. 

“Hm… If you insist…” You smiled devilishly and sat up on your knees and moved to hover over Usopp’s face, leaving your sopping cunt mere inches above his drooling lips. His eyes bugged wide out of his head, the sight of your gorgeous bare pussy so close to his face was too much for him to handle. 

“Do you want to taste it, Usopp?” You teased at him, being barely out of his reach, not sitting down fully just yet. 

“Mmm Yes! Yes just sit! Mmm please just sit down I’ll do whatever you  want, just use me, please!” His speech was almost slurred due to him trying to reach his tongue out of his mouth to taste you already. You gave into his pleas and fully lowered your body onto his face. A breathy sigh of pleasure escaped your lips as his tongue prodded your weeping hole. 

“Mmmprhh so-mrrph good!” Usopp whined out against your sex. He bucked his hips up shamelessly, already fully erect again. You leaned forward to grind your clit against the base of his nose while his tongue fucked your hole. You threw your head back in pleasure and moaned loudly. 

“Ohhh, sweetie that’s so good! You’re so perfect for letting me use your pretty face like this. Such a good boy for eating me so well!” You praised him as you continued to ride his face, bringing yourself to orgasm. 

“I’m going to cum on your face now, Usopp. You’re going to lay there and take it, right sweetheart?”

“Mhmm! Mhmm” He nodded his head as you finally pushed over the edge. Your slick juices sprayed his face and neck as you cried out. Usopp moaned underneath you as his tongue darted out of your hole to lap up any remaining release from your folds. 

You collected yourself and slid your body back down his chest, your pussy dragged a wet trail down his torso as you moved. You hovered over his weeping cock, leaking a puddle of precum onto his toned abdomen. 

“Would you like to fuck me now, Usopp?” You looked him square in the eye. He was so drunk on your body and pleasure. 

“Yes! Yes, Please, I’d like to fuck you now! Please let me inside of you!” Once again he was begging beneath you. You could definitely get used to his. “Ok sweetheart, you can fuck me now. You’ve done so good.” You coo at him as you line his cock up with your soaked entrance and slide down. He wasn’t as long as Sanji or Zoro, but it was thick and hit your spot just right as you took him to the base inside yourself. 

“Fuck-!” Usopp cries out as his hands fly to your hips to ground himself, so lost in the pleasure of your tight cunt. 

“Sweetie you fill me up so nice, doing such a good job-“ You moaned out dreamily as you began to grind yourself back and forth on Usopp’s cock. 

“Fuck y/n… I can’t… I just gotta…” 

All of a sudden Usopp plants his feet and slams his hips up into yours making you almost jolt off his dick in the process. He hit you so deep. 

“Usopp!” You cry out in both surprise and pleasure. You shudder forward and lose your balance, hands landing on his firm chest to hold yourself up. Usopp continues to piston his length inside of you at an animalistic pace as you felt that familiar tightness in your belly begin to form again. 

“Shit, Usopp I- I think I’m gonna- AH!” He was bouncing you so forcefully on his cock, the soft, shy Usopp you knew was long gone as soon as he sunk balls deep into your filthy cunt. Your body was being tossed in the air with every thrust, your full breasts bouncing lewdly in his face.  “Gotta feel you cum again… Fucking do it… Cum on me again…” Usopp growled out at you as he took your right nipple in his teeth. You cried out in pain and pleasure as his grip tightened on your hips, holding you so hard you knew you’d be left with black and blue marks where his fingers were now. You screamed out his name as you let your orgasm wash over your body and you released all over his lower half. 

“Y/n, fuck, where should I-?” Usopp gasps out. 

“Inside… Need… inside…” You choke out between gasps, your body still recovering from your orgasm.

Usopp groaned loudly as he pulled your hips down so far into his that you felt his cock kiss your cervix harshly. You whined as he shuddered and came deep inside of your still spasming pussy. 

His body went limp. You leaned forward while he was still seated within you to place a gentle kiss on the tip of his nose. You tried to as gently as possible remove yourself from his overly sensitive cock. He still groaned as you pulled yourself off of him, feeling his cum drip out of you onto his hip bone in the process. You laid down next to him and wrapped him in your arms. You pulled his down comforter over both of your naked bodies. You scratched his scalp as he nuzzled his face into your shoulder, and he wrapped his arms around your lower back. 

“SooOOOooo… What’dya think?” You giggled as you asked him how his first time was, already knowing the answer. 

“Y/n it was-“

“GLAD YOU FINALLY GET IT, LOSER!” You both heard Zoro’s drunk, booming voice from outside Usopp’s bedroom door. 

“FUCK YOU, ASSHOLE!” Usopp shouted, briefly rising from his resting place in the crook of your neck. 

You both laughed. You pecked him on the lips. “Goodnight, Usopp.”

“Goodnight, y/n.” 

You both quickly fell asleep in each others arms. 

[dollfaceksj]

THE SEXYAL TENSION U CANT CUT US OFF LIKE THAT WE NEED 10

u ask for drabble #10 and i shall deliver

warnings: teasing, tension, fuckboy!jk back in action, dilemma

have fun and all i’m gonna say is… THINK.

taste of a poison paradise | jjk (m) #10

masterlist

<- previous ; next ->

u jog up to the rest and swing the bag of snacks back and forth in their faces

“look what jungkook got us!” you beam, opening up the bag to show what’s inside

hyunjoo and isabella are just as excited as you, seokjin is just digging into the bag and yoongi is trying not to care

“good taste,” isabella quietly says to hyunjoo as she nudges her hip with her own

😀😀😀😀

inside joke?

she said it so quietly that you’re sure you weren’t supposed to hear that

you watch as hyunjoo starts blushing and she hides her face behind her hands whilst telling isabella to knock it off

….

alright then…. moving on?

“y’all are just in time for dinner, tae and jimin already set the table.” yoongi is the rational one as he keeps you up to date with what happened when y’all were gone

at least SOMEONE that actually thinks about you

he’s so :(( <333

you smile at him and just as you’re about to ask if you can have a talk with him, you hear the drop of water bottles hit the ground behind you

oop

hello

you turn to look over your shoulder and jungkook is right behind you, staring you down

eyes so black you’re convinced you’re staring down two bottomless pits. just an abyss

he looks

annoyed

“oh, thanks jungkook!” seokjin yells as he runs up to the packs of water and takes a few out to keep them in the coolbox. “you too, y/n!”

jungkook doesn’t respond and neither do you

but before you can get back to what you were doing

he wraps his hand around your bicep and pulls you with him a few meters, creating enough distance between the others and you to make sure no one hears

oh gosh

oh no

cue squidward voice

oh no he’s hot

oh ur gonna fold

ur gonna fold

ur gonna FOLD

jungkook starts, “i hope you know this means we’re even.”

you blink at him a couple times. “meaning?”

he lets go of your arm. “meaning it’s gonna go back to the way it was.”

ha

right right

???

you cross your arms over your chest, mischief glinting in your eyes as you glare up at him. “i don’t know, i liked it when you were all pathetic and needy, those eyes of yours just pleading and begging at my mercy.”

he narrows his eyes at you for a split second and then chuckles,,,,

he CHUCKLES

Yeah… he wasn’t kidding when he said it’s gonna go back to the way it was

cause you’re starting to feel smaller and smaller by the second

“speaking of,” he begins, completely disregarding your comment. “shouldn’t you apologize to me too?”

you frown. “and why the fuck should i?”

he laughs, shoulders bouncing as he LAUGHS in YOUR FACE. “i know you’re older than me but don’t pretend like you’re losing your memories. you said some hurtful things to me too.”

older than me

why

did he have

to remind you

for FUCKS sake wow

why did he kinda gag you😭

your lips twitch and you grit your teeth together trying to come up with a response.

“no comment? shall i remind you, then?” he starts, shoving his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants

you’re not gonna let him assert his dominance. “oh, do enlighten me.”

“good for nothing, narcissist, fucking loser, gross, nothing but a fuckboy,” he lists

damn that shit was weighing down on his mindddd

he listed that so fast. like he’d memorized it

you shrug your shoulders. “alright then, i apologize for those things.”

he squints his eyes at you again, already anticipating something mischievous from you

and he’s goddamn right

“but you are a fuckboy. i’m not apologizing for calling you that.”

there it is

he takes a step forward, closing whatever gap was between the two of you

“stop calling me a fuckboy.” his brows are furrowed and his breath fans over your face

“or what?” you retort with all the defiance you can muster

oof

this is

getting intense

cause why do you feel the back of your neck heating up….

he tilts his head slightly as he continues to stare you down. “if i really was a fuckboy, i’d have fucked you already.”

WOOP WOOP THATS THE SOUND OF DA POLICE

HUH

wait

okay

lets calm down

lets not let him get to you like before

you snort, “and you want me to apologize for calling you a narcissist?”

“saying that doesn’t make me a narcissist.” he looks around for a moment, head turned to the side

the side of his face that you smacked back in that club LMAOOO

your eyes instantly trace his jawline, his lips, the column of his throat, the adam’s apple bobbing up and down whenever he speaks or swallows

he’s so fucking fine…

“but if me thinking i’m the fucking best at what i do makes me one, then i’ll take it.” he turns his head again, facing you fully as his eyes shift back to yours

best at what i do

????

what is he…

is he referring

to

is he referring to fucking people?

don’t embarrass yourself.

ask for clarification.

your frown deepens. “what do you mean?”

he stares at you for what seems like ages, an unreadable expression on his face

his eyes drop down to your lips for a moment before they shift back up to make eye contact with you

then, a small smirk tugs at the corner of his lips for a few seconds before disappearing. “i think you know what i mean.” he nonchalantly takes his phone out of his pocket and glances at the time

does he know

you were thinking about …

him … having sex …

jesus girl stop being embarrassing 😭

he says, “now let’s go have dinner.”

and with that, he walks away

hm

okay…

nicely done

you know, before you didn’t know how to handle him

but now… now you know exactly how to play his game

you’ll take the bait

during dinner, you’re seated in between yoongi and tae and right across from you

is that FUCKER again

ugh life is just taunting you atp….

you’re all just sitting around, empty plates with food remnants on them and paper cups filled with water

“we should play never have i ever or truth or drink!” tae beams

hoseok replies, “we don’t have any alcohol.”

“so? we can just do it with water!” tae suggests and everyone’s just glancing at each other

“fuck it, why not?” yoongi says as he pours water into your cup without you asking

yoongi is such a gentleman… wow.

fighting every urge not to drop onto your knees and give him the filthiest, sloppiest blowjob of his life

you’re looking around and it seems like everyone is starting to like the idea of a game

“never have i ever gotten high,” tae starts and immediately reaches for his own cup

you watch as joon, yoongi, tae and jimin drink

well… whatever is revealed on the camping trip, stays here

you sheepishly reach for your own cup and take a sip

everyone starts laughing, asking you when and why but you quickly dismiss them with a wave of your hand

“okay, never have i ever masturbated more than 3 times a day,” jimin says

DAMN? going straight for the inappropriate asks

and you watch as seokjin, hoseok and joon reach for their cups

more than 3 times should be illegal…

put these BEASTS behind bars

IMMEDIATELY!!

but then

hyunjoo raises her cup to her lips too

wow??? shes been so quiet and shy

like don’t judge a book by it’s cover but you’d have never expected it from her😭😭

not that she masturbates a lot… but that she’d admit it like this 😭

props to her

everyone roars at the revelation and shes just hiding her burning face

you laugh at the scene in front of you and shake your head, they’re so ridiculous

“i have one,” hoseok starts, making everyone turn to him

hoseok is known as the guy that always asks ridiculous things that no one can drink to

“never have i ever had sex with someone that’s sitting at this table.”

see? ridiculous.

like how would–

wait

why are hyunjoo and isabella giggling as they reach for their cup :)

and why is jungkook raising the cup to his lips :)

this

uhhhh

wow

😂😂😂😂😂😂

yeah let’s not act crazy rn

so

this means they either had a threesome or he fucked both one on one

you don’t like either outcome

wait

what are you even saying?

jungkook can do whatever the fuck he wants

like literally why the fuck do you care

everyone’s laughing and asking stuff but jungkook and the girls are staying quiet and shaking their head while laughing

okay well at least they’re having a good time😂😂😂😂😂

😐

smilin’ but it ain’t funny. smilin’ but it ain’t funny.

you should have known these two random ass girls have had sex with that fuckboy

community dick

hm

college community dick

yeah

college community cock?

CCC

LMFAOOOO

yeah. new nickname alert.

you glance at jungkook but he’s not looking at you, no, he’s glancing at the two giggling girls at the end of the table with a small smile on his lips

and you don’t like it one bit

“moving on,” you interrupt, “never have i ever been brutally rejected.”

everyone turns to look at you. “brutally?” joon echoes

“yeah like, with a slap to the face or something.”

they all go “ahhh” but they shake their heads, implying that has never happened before

you stare jungkook down and he’s staring back. you watch as the realization sets on his face and that he has to be the only one that has to drink to this particular scenario

he wanted you to take his bait, right?

his eyes glimmer with something you can’t quite put your finger on but he picks up his cup nonetheless and drinks, being the only one at the table who does so

right right

let’s see if he’s still up to play games with you

everyone laughs at the fact jungkook had gotten slapped before and he nods with a smile, allowing them to laugh at him

“my turn,” he starts and then his eyes land on you again. “never have i ever thrown my good friend under the bus by lying to save my own ass for something insignificant.”

record scratch

ohfuck

IS HE

Oh no

WHY WOULD HE DO THIS

everyone looks around. “ohhh good one, that’s so messed up,” jimin laughs as he slaps jungkook’s shoulder

fuck

fuck

FUCK

no one’s drinking

oh you’re gonna look like a shit fucking friend

you scratch the back of your head as you slowly reach for the cup and take a sip

everyone at the table is now focused on you

“y/n! it better not have been me!” tae yells as he pokes your sides which almost makes you spill water over yourself

you grumble, “no, of course not.” you put your cup back down and glance up at jungkook, who is sitting right across from you, still fucking looking at you

hands against the bench he’s sitting on, on each side of his hips as he leans on them, head tilted back and staring you down with the most shit-eating fucking grin

you need to slap that right off his pretty face

JERK

the games continue and whenever it comes back to you or jungkook, it’s just underhanded jabs between you two that thankfully no one else seems to notice

it’s past 11pm now and it’s time to go to sleep so you slowly rise to your feet

you and jungkook were kinda the only ones without a task aside from picking up water so you were assigned to clean up with him

he told you to wait for him while he goes to pee

but ur not gonna wait for him so you gather the plates of everyone, watching as yoongi suddenly appears next to you to help you out

“you prepared the food, you don’t have to clean up.” you remind him of the delicious food he helped preparing for you

like yoongi is such a good cook yo😭😭

he shakes his head. “i want to.”

you smile and continue to gather plates and cups

ugh and you’re moments away from getting into a tent with jeon jung fucking kook

like just being that close to him for that long has got to be some kind of divine punishment

wait

you’re such a fucking bitch

this man is being so fucking sweet, cleaning up with you when he literally doesn’t have to and you’re thinking about some random fuckboy?

enough.

it’s time to set the record straight before shit gets out of hand

you need to make a choice

and you need to choose wisely

“yoongi?” you call out to him, watching as he swiftly turns to you, responding with a soft ‘hm?’

“can we talk?” you quietly ask as you place the plates back down on the table and walk up to him

“of course.” he says, reaching out to adjust the earring in your earlobe. “what’s bothering that pretty head of yours?”

fuck

his hands are so soft

wow

get real

you need to be serious

calm down

you can do this

CHOOSE WISELY

to be continued

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[adorejungkook]

Baby Got Back!!

Synopsis; Jeon Jungkook has the fattest fucking crush on you meanwhile Jimin and Taehyung don’t find you too hard to look at either. Now Jungkook has to find a way to confess his feelings, maybe even show you,  before the other two find their ways into your pants during your “staycation”. 

Warnings; series, eventual (almost immediate) smut, pining, the boys are horny they talk a bit raunchy about you, big dick!jk (they call it small tho they're just bullying) ,first chapter is pretty tame, you canonically have a nice booty <3

chapter. 1 , 2, 3, 4 , 5

Jungkook hated it when you were around.

You were just so fucking nice, so pretty. He could barely think around you.

The best days were when you decided to let Jimin drag you to lunch along with him and the other two boys. 

“Wait, you’re really leaving us for a whole week? Whyyy,” Taehyung whined, leaning into your side, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you closer. They were all so comfortable with you, Jungkook had no idea how. He knew he’d combust if he was in his friends position, especially with the way you were running your fingers through his hair. 

Was it weird to wonder how you smelled right now?

“ Not even a whole week!” you say, giggling a bit when Tae groans at you pushing him off you a bit, “My parents really wanted me to come home for like three days, you’ll live.”

“You promised you’d come with us this weekend,” Jimin puffs, pushing cerulean strands away from his eyes, “I already rented our Airbnb and it was expensive as shit! If you don’t come I’m just gonna assume you hate me,” 

It was so hard to focus on the conversation, with the way his friends were sandwiching you between them. He looked down, knitting his eyebrows and running his tongue along the side of his cheek. He kept his eyes on his plate when you said you had to leave early and pushed out a small ‘bye’ when you squeezed his shoulder on your way out.

“Kook, you can stop crying now,” 

“I wasn't!” Jungkook huffs, whipping his head up to pout at his older friends laughing at him. They only made his situation harder, teasing him about you every chance they got.

“Uh, why are you yelling at me when I just got your girlfriend to come on the trip?” Jimin asks, a hand over his heart to feign hurt. Taehyung wiggles his eyebrows at the younger boy before stealing a couple fries from his plate.

“What? She said she was coming like a week ago hyung,” 

“Oh my god,” Jimin snorted, “Have you not been paying attention? What were you doing for like the past twenty minutes?” 

“Probably looking at her ass,” Taehyung interjects, waving his salt covered fingers in Jungkook’s direction.

“She was sitting down bruh,”

“I know. Her ass is still amazing,”

Jimin pauses for a moment, staring at his grinning friend. 

“You’re right, though,”He giggles, eyes turning to crescent moons with his bright smile.

Here they go again. Jungkook’s friends were never shy about their attraction to you, even though they knew about his long held crush. He figured it was because they thought he’d never act on it. They were probably right.

“Listen, she was thinking about going to her parents for three days but I convinced her to only go for the weekend so that she could still come with us,” Jimin smirked, puffing out his chest as if he deserved a medal for his ‘work’. 

Well, considering he just saved Jungkook a good two hours of sulking, maybe he did.

“Thank god, I packed like 3 pairs of grey sweatpants and no underwear! I would’ve wasted all my ‘sexy’ on… you two,” Jungkook said, pretending to gag with a finger in his mouth.

“Ew, bruh.” Jimin grimanced .

“I’m gross but y’all were just sitting here talking about ___’s ass?”

Taehyung patted his shoulder from across the table, giving him a pitiful stare.

“Her ass is actually sexy and your little dick is like a Kandinsky painting.”

“Beautiful?” Jungkook snorts, a smile creeping onto his face.

“Nah, abstract!” He replied, falling back on his seat in a fit of giggles.

It was going to be a long two days without you.