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#I think I'm just a little tired today...
pixelatedraindrops · 2 months
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Sorry to sound weird or negative here, but after spilling my inner emotions on a discord server I kinda wanna know.
Do you all enjoy what I do here?
Or do you find it repetitive and boring?
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cerise-on-top · 5 months
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Hi, love your writing. it's so good 💚💚
Could I request some HC for LV + Graves who have an S/O who has three cats that love to sleep on top of them?
😸💚
Thank youuuu! That's very kind of you! This ask actually inspired me to text my friend again and ask her for some cat pics since those critters are just so goshdarn adorable!! I wish I had a cat! I once had a tortoise, though, and she was just the most lovely and adorable little thing out there! I loved her so dearly! Anyway, thank you for the request!
Alejandro, Rodolfo and Graves with an S/O with Three Cats
Alejandro: He gives off quite some canine energy, so there’s a chance your cats won’t like him too much. That, of course, you can try to combat by having him feed them. Either way, if they like Alejandro, then you can expect him to be all over your cats, always talking to them, petting them, picking them up, kissing them and what else it is you do with a cat. He loves your little kitties and would kill someone for them. Although he’s more of a dog person himself, he doesn’t prefer dogs by much, so he can really go either way. When he sees just how cuddly your cats are and when they take a nap on his chest while he’s watching TV with you or something, he will not hesitate to pet the cat, scratch the little fella behind its ears and try his best to make them purr. He loves the sound and the vibration, it brings good vibes and makes him just as content as the cat. The rule that one must not move when a cat is sleeping on top of them holds true for him. If he needs to use the bathroom while one of your cats is sleeping on him then he’ll just have to endure until it wakes up. But if he’s content as well, then he might just cuddle the cat, or your cats even, and take a nap himself. While he’s not usually one for napping, he will when he genuinely can’t move because of your lovely little felines. If your cats let him, he will give them big hugs as well. Is so smitten, he’ll buy them some toys and play with them, if he has the time. And if your cats are too lazy to actually play, then he’ll pick them up and lovingly scold them for being so unmotivated. Meows back at cats too.
Rodolfo: He gets along well with just about any animal. While he’s not scared of them per se, he does have a healthy amount of respect for them and won’t just walk up to your cats to give them pats and kisses and hugs. He will comply if your cats walk up to him because they’re curious, but he really doesn’t want to annoy them or worse, end up with him getting scratched. While he may not meow back at your cats either, he will talk to them as though they’re regular human beings. It’s somewhat funny, he takes them seriously and will, in a deadpan tone, tell them that there will be no more snacky treats for the evening. No matter how annoying your cats might get, he won’t budge. His decision is final, so there are no more snacky treats. He quite likes the thing where if you scratch a cat’s butt, it will move it upwards. Loves doing that to your cats, it’s funny and endearing to him. When your cats are sleeping on top of him, then he won’t particularly budge either. He’ll pat them, but he will also move them if he really needs to use the bathroom. No privileges for your cats this time. However, considering he is, more often than not, pretty tired, he will pretty much always take a nap with your cats if he can. The pressure on his chest is comforting to him, plus he gets to feel something nicely warm and furry on top of him as well. However, he sometimes moves in his sleep, which might wake up your cats, which might wake up him. It’s a never ending circle, but if he can, he’ll just sleep with your cats in his arms. Take a picture of him like that and he’ll try to take embarrassing pictures of you as well with your cats.
Graves: He is definitely more of a dog person, since those are strong and reliable. A cat will meow at you in the dead of the night because it knocked over its water bowl and can’t turn on the faucet on its own. Honestly? He always has something to complain about. Your cat pooped again. It knocked over the food bowl. It farted in his face. Things like that. He means them, but the way he says those things is sort of just funny. Imagine a 40 year old man having beef with a cat. He has very little shame when it comes to scolding your cats. At first, he will use his human words to get them to listen. But as soon as he realizes they believe it’s snuggle time, he will meow at them, making the situation even worse. However, every time you hand him one of your cats, he will take it from your arms and cuddle it a bit. Every time one of the critters walks up to him, demanding attention, he will pick it up and carry it around a bit. Sometimes in his arms, sometimes he just slings the cat over his shoulder and keeps it there. It’s sort of funny, he might pretend to really hate them, but he would never yell at them, only be stern and tell them to not be so gluttonous. When your cats are sleeping on top of him, he does not move an inch. He would never admit it, but they are your shared furry babies and he, like any American, would shoot anyone who ever tried to hurt you or them. Takes naps too when he can, or when nothing of interest is on TV, but he prefers getting to hold something instead of having your cats lie on top of you. You can take pictures of him to show him that he really doesn’t hate your cats as much as he pretends to, but he will always claim you photoshopped it, despite knowing fully well that happened.
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jils-things · 1 month
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by the lighthouse.
dividers
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why-the-heck-not · 3 months
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insomnia? do u mean my true crime podcast time
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icewindandboringhorror · 10 months
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... why he sit like this
#in this position his face is extremely 'cartoon cat' shaped.. like the perfectly round cheeks and little#rounded bump of a snout.. big round eyes. etc. stretched over the arm of a chair like a weirdo#cats#It's still Hot Evil Summer time and I have so much to do so am just aimlessly hopping between various projects but not actually#getting anything done. as usual. Also so so so so tired. I almost fell asleep in the middle of the floor like 3 times today lol#Trying to finish some costume photos and also another poll adventure thing. plus I do really want to do a sculpture sometime#I haven't finished one in a while. Hopefully my tiredness is nothing bad.#Maybe I'm anemic again so that's making me tired. Or maybe it's just a Listless phase. not that I'm ever really THAT productive considering#all of the health problems and etc. always holding me back. but still. I'm not usually 'sleep or just stare at a wall literally all day' ty#e unproductive.. at least not for multiple days in a row so. hmm... Sometimes especially in the summer though I will have periods of time#that are listless like that. I am under low level phyiscal stress for months at a time due to summer heat so I guess it makes sense#that would eventually take a toll. I just have SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO!!!!! AAUUGhhh#I also came up with a new idea for a game that is so so cool and I wish I could make it but I have to finish the other one first lol#which I will NEVER do. if I spend all day just sleepy unfocused barely able to do anything#I also really need to sell some clothes and sculptures because I'll probably have to buy a new computer soon so I need money. (plus still#recovering the costs of having to euthanize my other cat.. wehh) There's nothing clearly wrong with it right now but it's getting gradually#slower and there's more weird glitches happening randomly and idk.. just weird things that make me think 'hmm... bad.. possibly.'#ANYWAY... I just have so much to do that I both REALLY want or need to do - so it's perpetually frustrating that I just can't for whatever#reason like. Time is always mving forward. every day I waste is a wasted day. The year is already almost half over. I havent finished#any of the projects I wanted to .. and there's only more and more things to do each day. It's overwhelming and stinky#and thats not even considering having to do all of my tasks also with the background noise of economic inequality. everything increasingly#going into an even scarier political direction. active climate change crisis. pandemic that still exists and is insane to act otherwise. et#etc. HOW am I supposed to solo make two whole games . write 3 book series. finish sculptures. do costumes. make outfits. game videos. make#stable network of social connections. do my little side crafts. take care of myself and cats. pay rent. manage health issues. keep a routin#.try to make some sort of money. go to doctors appointments. handle regular maintenance like cleaning and cooking and self care#and buying new plates when old ones break or etc. make sure to do other things like backup my computer data regularly. do shopping lists.#take care of plants. pursue like 6 different academic interests. do the other side side projects I have for fun (like music or carving avoc#ado pits). eat in a healthy way thats okay for my Special Health Issue diet. exercise so i don't die early. etc. etc. etc. AND all while it#82F in my apartment all the time and I have tiny income and also need to move to another country/climate somehow??? lol......#ANYWAY.. ..very frustrated today over my chronic Tired Sleepy.. time for Cat Photos - which cure all of life's ailments lol
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lit-in-thy-heart · 10 months
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been trying out a new writing technique recently and it's called chilling tf out and reminding myself that fic is written for fun.
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Mc has to catch Belphie but all they are doing is throwing a blanket over him and watching how the struggling slowly stops until he is deadly still
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toasteaa · 10 days
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If I seem like I'm a bitch today, I'm very sorry. I'm genuinely cranky and trying to keep it together 😔💙
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non-un-topo · 9 months
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Talking to my sister can be one of the most aggravating experiences
#just allowing myself a few moments of self-pity today#because i'm a little overstimulated/sick of people talking AT me#i have begun to notice that i'm never asked anything... not a single thing. no questions about my life or interests or how school is going#no questions about my partner or our anniversary and no acknowledgement of the big haircut i just got#no questions about my BIL's wedding. none about my health.#every day it's just people talking AT me. kind of tired at the moment...#and this is made worse by my sister's holier-than-thou attitude about literally the smallest and most insignificant things#like washing clothes? and cooking rice?? idk she talks like a housewife now.#and i get to listen to her complain about her 35 year old boyfriend and not say ONE kind thing for 2 hours straight#not a single question for me. not a single nice thing. and i'm talked over constantly#it's not like i don't raise my voice or speak my mind lol#it's just that. between my family and my partner's family. it feels like no one knows just how smart i am and how much fun i can be.#my partner is perfect in so many ways. my best friend and the kindest and most compassionate person i know.#but i really could brag and boast like my sister does over absolutely nothing. because i have actual achievements. but i don't#because who does that lol. fucking annoying and rude people.#maybe my family just thinks i'm okay and so they never ask me anything or call me. ever.#but see.... i don't talk to them because i want advice or help or money. i talk to them because they're my family#and i would very much like to feel cherished and loved by them#/ end angst and self-pity boo hoo
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theimpossibleness · 5 months
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I wish I was more than what I am
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criscura · 4 months
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I wish I wasn't so exhausted and I could make more art.... I even planned out a whole prompt-a-day month for Saigenos/Genosai, TWICE, but the first time no one seemed like they could participate when I asked about it, and the second time I friggin lost the damned plan. I could remake it a third time, but I just....I don't know.
I've been really struggling to get along for a while, and I think if it didn't hit it off--or even if I just got really productive and it seemed like I was reaching crickets--I'd be so incredibly discouraged that it would bring me down even further. It usually takes my stuff a few months to a year to get reach, and that really doesn't do anything for me when I need the support immediately.
It's not that I don't have a billion ideas for so many different things, but my battery has been taking longer and longer to charge up and it's been running out faster and faster, and it's been like this for....a year?? Ish?? Maybe longer, I don't know.
I wish I could just stop needing so much fucking time to bounce back.....
#written from my bed as I'm almost crying from exhaustion and hopelessness#I'm PMSing and I had a really tiring day so i know this feels worse than normal#but when you've been struggling to fall asleep for months because waking up means being disappointed in yourself#for everything you failed to do the day before and everything you know you're going to fail to do again today#it's really hard not to feel like shit about yourself#trying to be constantly hopeful but never living up to your expectations#and then the few times that you do you completely crash for days#and then the only way to not crash is to have your big accomplishment be 'i went to the gym' 'i took a shower' 'i answered a message'#and just. again#to have the be the way you're living for months and months and months#it's so embarrassing to admit how little i can do and it makes me so ashamed knowing how much I've done and see what everyone else around me#is constantly doing#and then when i do share things it just kind of dies off because I've been too exhausted to maintain most relationships#which ALSO makes me feel like absolute fucking shit because i think people think i just don't care about them#when it's really that it takes me hours to get out of bed and I'm lucky if i remember to eat before 4#and I hate so much of myself and see it as such a huge waste of time that it uses up almost all the energy i have to take care of myself#but if i don't do it I'll just hate myself even more#i know i keep on complaining about this but I'm. I'm trying to fix it#i have BEEN trying to fix it actively for so fucking long#but it's.....i think I've stopped believing anything i do has significant worth and it makes it hard to keep trying#and i know people will read this and say take something for it but when you're only interactions with medications and drugs#are one experience that scarred you so bad you didn't go to the doctors for ten years and one experience so bad#that you couldn't even explain it at first without HARDCORE disassociating#it's hard to convince yourself that anything will ever be any better and that it won't make everything intensely worse for years
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lupismaris · 4 months
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Didn't get to smoke before work this morning (also not at all confident I took my meds) and while I'm managing the immense stress of the day (hello three new projects) rather well I'm reminded that the ritual of a spliff and a cup of coffee does in fact help keep my teeth dull and my temper subdued
#asked my fellow hiring committee members one of whom is my supervisor if i was really the only person who liked one candidate#and was blatantly honest that I think the issue at hand is the ego/insecurities of the man who oversees this role/department#and we have to toe the line of choosing someone good for the job and who wont be bullied by him/clash with him 24/7#and id been shocked that i was the only one who saw potential in one or two candidates and ultimately i think it's due#to the fact im less willing to let the supervisors insecurities/ego play a role in this. and i said as much#and the response was a laugh and 'well shit everyone duck for cover he might hear us james is getting nasty '#and I'm not really im just tired of pretending like that isnt the core of the issue here. his ego has been wounded for the whole o last yeat#*year and now he's continuously making it everyone else's problem and whomever gets this role with be the Andy to his Miranda#except he has so little to offer in terms of real guidance i feel. hes going to bully and boast and be petty to whomever gets chosen#but any attempt to say that to leadership will get waved away ultimately because he's leadership and he's fought to get his own admin#so rather than get someone with a diverse and varied skill set who can match him in work and intensity#we'll end up with some kid who probably cant set boundaries and will get steamrolled completely#so yeah im irritated by the whole process. and my lack of meds today is making it hard to play nice about it
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mothram · 6 months
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youtube
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shoreline-system · 1 year
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listen man i have to be real with you. the constant need + expectation to keep pushing yourself as a disabled person is utterly exhausting and i don't think this is sustainable actually
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ghcstcd · 6 months
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Also, I'm not making any changes to Dew and his design anytime soon, unless it naturally occurs. (Like how I flip flop with some of his design features, same happens when discussing his character.)
Again, thank you to those who reached out, clarified, and reassured me.
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I have found a beautiful perfect humble rock specimen that is light yellow with a weird dark yellowy brown lining, somewhat resembling a chunk of smoked gouda cheese... effervescent
#I am still very into trash collecting at the moment and even went out and got one of those grabby sticks for cheap and a little#bucket I can carry around and put trash in. so I am going on walks in nature a bit more (not really to enjoy nature but more to play the#very fun Real Life Hidden Object Point And Click Game that is 'hunt for bottle caps and cans' .. but eh.. whatever gets me out of the#house lol).. anyway.. some nature places near water will have cool rocks#Which I know you're not supposed to take them and I MOSTLY dont.. but every once in a while it's like... when else will I ever find a#gouda rock... I have cleaned up 4 buckets of trash today.. I have helped the environment.. mayhaps.. i could take a One Single Rocke as a#treate... ANYWAY. but yeah. I don't know the names of rocks but there's a rock that's a matte muted marigold yellow sort of#color and I call them 'cheese rock'. I'm pretty sure this one is of the 'cheese rock' species but it just has weird brown coloration#like maybe it got stained or something on one side of it. Most of the other cheese rocks have no markings. though sometimes there will be a#auburn reddish sort of hue on a corner or something.. hrmm.. curious. I also got a Beginner's Hobby rock tumbler and some supplies#so I might try polishing some of the rocks from my enormous rock collection. even though they're all street rocks I picked up from sidewalk#and stuff. I saw a video where someone put random gravel and stuff in a rock tumbler and none of them were Stunning Gems or whatver#but some still turned out cool enough that I would be pleased with the result... OUgh.. I want to post more I need to like do costumes and#sculptures and stuff and be Active On Social Media and think about my Future and Career and how it always benefits artists to keep an#active social media or etc. but I just feel so tired and bad lately. I think the summer heat waves have really exhausted me. I also have#been trying to make new friends + on a weird schedule so I've been socializing and also watching media too much. I notice I always start#to feel this kind of unsettled stress of not making any forward progress in my life if I do that for too long. like 'Okay this week I've#done nothing but meet up with two friends & watch like 10 episodes of tv and only worked on a few projects on the side.. this is HORRIBLE!'#(ppl who follow me here that I talk to on discord: this isn't about you! Im specifically just referencing being tired of introductory talks#with a new round of random strangers during my Friend Hunt. Just clarifying so it couldn't be misinterpreted as vaguepost implying that I'm#secretly bothered by talking to you or etc. lol.. anyway) . Which I know to MOST people 'I talked to a lot of friends and watched some cool#stuff!' sounds like a GOOD relaxing time but.. to me it is not ghhj.. Those are 'external' focuses on things outside myself which bothers#me if not moderated. Like.. i MUST retreat internally to work on my worldbuilding and my own thoughts and etc. at very regular intervals or#it will really start to bear on me too much. Brain Mandated Hermit Isolation lol. Just being too detached from my world and stuff for#too long feels increasingly bad. PLUS. every day I don't make tangible progress towards my goals is a day wasted that I could have been#investing in my future by working on novels/games/sculptures/actual career relevant stuff. Not even in a Capitalism way i just genuinely#enjoy Completing Tasks & feel miserable if I don't for too long. EVEN the media I'm watching I turn into A Task since I rank in a detailed#google doc list after viewing lol.. Like EW movie too boring on it's own. NEED to turn it into something I can categorize and analyze ghghj#LOVE to make things more complicated than they need to be. like YAAAY organizational tasks! yaay meticulous sorting!! BOO ''mindless fun''!
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