#I want what Perry the Platypus and Doofenshmirtz have

[r0-boat]

Villain submas head cannons

I have priorities

CW: degrading and dirty talk are mentioned, it gets kinky, but everything is a consensual relationship between two villains and their beloved hero.

Sfw

World info:

World leaders, governments, and other higher up hire Heroes to combat world threats. What they don't know is that some of the heroes are villains and are dating each other. ( or they know and don't care, as long as they are stopping the problem, even if it's temporarily, LOL)

Villains doing their villain things is their actual job, and they have work hours off hours, vacations, and weekends, just like Heroes. Their main bases are not only their homes but their place of work when they are not being super villains; they're basically living like normal people.

Emmet

Alignment: chaotic evil

Emmet's evil schemes are like his art don't diss his art. He spends years perfecting each evil plan. Just to be foiled by the hero(you), hehe; it's not like he minds, though.

Once he's done with his evil scheme, he sends it to his brother

He crafts each evil scheme with your weaknesses and likeness in mind to show how much he loves you. Pretty much, he sees it like a date.

Has a minion Army of jail text each one has their own names, like Giovanni, he sits on a chair petting his galventula

Unlike ingo he likes causing chaos because he's bored.

Nothing Else Matters except his brother his Hero, and his army of joltics.

Unironically agrees with Megamind the presentation makes you a supervillain.

If he plans a juicy take over the world evil plan just to see some fucking hero that isn't you walking through his base, he just says screw it and throws the plans away for another day, making sure to kill the No Name hero in the process.

Emmet: "You like me, and you like that I'm evil" and you're angry because it's true

Ingo

Alignment: lawful evil

Some villains just don't have class, no dirty tricks and is willing to negotiate.

"I got to get ready. I'm supposed to face the hero in an epic battle; I hope they think I'm cool."

"Brother please stop antagonizing the citizens further we've already made our point"

Emmet may have planned this, but ingo is a force to be reckoned with; ingo not only knows and is responsible for executing the plans,

Ingo and Emmet plan together, but Emmet is usually seen on the front lines because Ingo has a nasty habit of doing villain monologues where he Reveals their entire project. So Ingo Works within the Shadows, ensuring everything goes according to plan.

Other villains are jealous of their relationship with their arch nemesis

Vilain: I'm so jealous of your relationship with your hero; mine is usually too tired for cuddle time afterward. They don't even come over on our days off.

Ingo: well... anyone would be tired after a long day of work Please make sure your hero gets plenty of rest time before you execute your plan. A key to any good relationship is communication. Do you have your hero's private number... No?... Oh, dear... If you want to have a special relationship with your Nemesis, make sure they know that they're special. I hope that helps

Villain: * writing on a notepad* yes! Thank you!

He will always leave you snacks in secret places for you to find just in case you get hungry trying to find him.

And always leaves at least some videotape or message praising you for getting out of a trap.

He's still working on his evil laugh.

Steals precious material just to make you jewelry you thank and kiss him but then threatened him to put it back.

Nsfw

Never opposed to railing you on the job. They always has condoms on them because of it.

Emmet absolutely loves taking you after he captures you. Watching you struggle against the shackles as he explains his plans with his cock deep inside of you.

No matter during work or in the bed you will always have a safe word.

Ingo drools at your hero costume wishing that you could step on him just once.

Emmet made executed his plan just for you to find rose petals leading to the bedroom yes this actually happened; you're starting to think he makes some of these just to get your attention, then yes, yes, he does...

They Always always asks for your consent before doing any darker role-play kinks.

Don't mind Emmet's harsher degrading and dirty talk he'll never actually mean it, he likes the immersion.

They almost had a sex dungeon they only didn't do it because they would have a lot of explaining to do if, someone other than you raids their main base.

Emmet may or may not have a collar made with (insert your Heroes weakness here)

During after work hours or on their days off they still hit you up for you to come over and have couple time ; )

[this-is-a-name-dont-worry]

wait concept: Perry is asked to have a young agent in training with him for one day, so they can observe an agent on mission. When Perry goes to fight Doofenshmirtz, Doof ends up not wanting to fight when he sees that very young agent in training; he says it's because he doesn't want to help owca train more agents that could defeat him. So instead of fighting today, Doof and Perry will make sure this young agent is happy and spoiled (so they'd want to join the side of Doofenshmirtz of course!)

[snoopledrooplecheesedoodle]

Hero and Villain Au! TWST Ideas

Bear with me I working on other's requests and fics I want to write. My neurodivergence has been kicking my ass, but I suddenly had an idea. If you want me to write any of these let me know.

Reader is a reporter from some big news company ordered to interview the two models Vil Schoenheit and Neige LeBlanche. Vil acts very cold towards you thinking you are trying to smear his pristine reputation, while Neige is desperate to talk to someone out of the business. You've got a hero and villain soon pinning after you in disguise and regular outfits.

Poor reader is being pulled around like a ragdoll as Vil kidnaps you to have some one-on-one time without that heroic twerp interrupting. He wants to be your hero not Neige. Neige swoops in to save the day but is Neige really as heroic and kind as the media makes him out to be?

Another idea is Malleus being the most powerful villain in the city, being third most terrifying in the world. You are a regular civilian who works as a nurse. Your long shifts prevent you from keeping up with the news, so you have no idea of the evil you let into your house. Malleus was severely wounded by a hero and was on death's doorstep but angelic little you saved him and now he's convinced you two are meant to be. He won't take no for an answer.

Final idea, a Dr. Doofenshmirtz vs Perry the Platypus style feud between hero you and Idia. Idia grows frustrated with always losing to you, making deadlier machines to defeat you. However, one of the machines turns on him and you save him before he becomes a blue grease spot. This gets his delusional little mind whirring with the ideas. Now he's trying to trap you in order to have cute little "dates" with you (no babe this is still kidnapping). It doesn't help that he has a cute little brobot that also thinks you and his "brother" are meant to be. Fitting song for this is My Freeze Ray from Dr. Horrible sing-along blog.

Tell me what you think?

[inators]

From that one prompt that said 'Heinz Doofenshmirtz has died'

The main console nearly bowed to the power of Perry's fists as he slammed them down, chair behind him clattering to the ground from the force at which he stood. He glared up at the screen, murder in his eyes and a ferocious curl to his lip. That was not funny.

Major Monogram and Carl glanced at each other, then back down at Perry with some amount of trepidation. Everyone knew of Perry's less-than-professional connection to Heinz Doofenshmirtz; they just didn't know how deep that connection ever went. "We understand that this might come as a bit of a... shock. We just got the news ourselves."

Perry's fists clenched even harder, if such were possible; his nails dug into his palms as he ground his teeth. Heinz, dead? Impossible. He had just thwarted him yesterday. The resultant explosion from his self-destruct button shouldn't have been near enough to cause serious harm. Not to the most resilient man he knew. Could it be? Did someone finally manage to thwart his nemesis? But that was his job. Who else... What else...?

( If this was Peter's work, he thought savagely, then OWCA would have a rogue agent on its hands in no time flat. )

「Show him to me,」demanded the agent without preamble, his signage snapped out restlessly. He held up a finger when Carl opened his mouth to object.「Now.」

Carl pressed a button. A pneumatic tube appeared next to Perry, which he tried not to hurry into. His mind was still reeling from the news... If it was news. Some elaborate plan, perhaps — or a duplicate, a clone, a doppelgänger of some sort. He'd cloned Perry before. Why not himself? He felt sick. His stomach was tying itself in knots. It was as if his body knew, even if he refused to believe it himself. Don't be dead, Heinz, he prayed, his heart beginning to ache as its beat thundered in his ears. Don't. Don't. Don't.

The morgue was clean in a way that was disturbing even to Perry. Every inch of it gleamed with a sickening promise. I will take him, it whispered as Perry exited the tube. I will take him and tear him apart.

He was so small.

Perry swallowed hard and approached the gurney, his body beginning to shake. Monogram and Carl stood nearby the tube, but he didn't care about his audience just now. Heinz — wonderful, ridiculous, extraordinary Heinz — lay there cold and lifeless. His arms were missing; someone had put them to the side in preparation for the autopsy, he guessed, but it only served to make his nemesis look... Tiny. Frail. Helpless. His fingers danced over his narrow forehead, down his cheek and along his neck where he finally stopped to check for a pulse. He bent, listening for a cough, a breath, anything, but nothing came. His own breath caught in his throat. No. No-no-no.

Ever so slowly, ever so painfully, Perry realized that yes, he was looking at his esteemed beloved cherished nemesis. He could remember every burn, every scar, both pink and grey, old and new. They were all there. Every single mark, every single story, mapped out on the stiff body displayed before him.

Perry choked.

Was he sick, or was that a sob? There was a constriction in his throat that he didn't recognize, and a wetness in his eyes that he refused to name. He breathed hard through his mouth, tried to let the pressure out, but he couldn't. For once, Perry the Platypus couldn't control himself. His fingers clenched on the side of the gurney as he tried and failed to stem his tears, determinedly blinking them away. Heinz wouldn't want him to cry. He would never want Heinz to see him crying. He needed to be the personification of unstoppable, dynamic fury that Heinz knew. For Heinz, he needed to be Agent P.

I never got to tell you, he lamented, and let his fingers trace over Heinz's cheek again. I never got to tell you... but I will show you.

He took one last look at Heinz, not knowing what his expression looked like — not wanting to know what his expression looked like — and turned away, heading back for the tube.

"Agent P — " Monogram tried; but Perry shouldered past him and took the tube back to his lair, where he shouldered his jetpack and headed straight for Doofenshmirtz Evil, Inc. He would find out who did this if it took his last breath.

And they would pay.

[mammalsofaction]

SIKE! GET LOVED IDIOT

Rating: G

Relationship: Heinz Doofenshmirtz & Perry the Platypus, Heinz Doofenshmirtz/Perry the Platypus

Add tags: fix it fic, rewrite the unmentionable chibiverse episode, the destiel-fication of Perryshmirtz, this is an excuse for me showeing Heinz with love and aftercare.

AN: Many thanks to my lovely, sleepy beta @agentlizardofowca, who sent me the video through discord so it could be the first thing i would see upon waking up so we could both yell at each other about it. They fucking destiel-ed him.

---

"Perry the Platypus!"

There is a brief, but meaningful applause as he descends in appropriately melodramatic way. The stage is well built, and the mic doesn't screech. Perry keeps an eye on the prize, even as he swallows the given pill.

Heinz looks…wary. He did not, at least, have his arms crossed, but over the course of the last few hours Perry notices how he's grown to hunch further into himself, curling into his seat. His brows were deeply furrowed, like he was waiting to be physically hit at any moment, which still might be likely.

The pill goes down smooth as butter. There is a discernible electrical buzz, from his insides. As he coughs, he expects himself to belch smoke. Instead, as he approaches the mic, he speaks with a voice that was his-and-not-his-own.

"Well, hello there!"

Heinz yells in disbelief. Perry blinks.

"Oh, that is weird, hearing you speak,"

It's an even weirder sensation, Perry thinks, to be able have Heinz firmly understand him speak. He grips the edges of the podium tightly, then forcibly relaxes.

"Heinz," he laughs nervously. It still sounds like it came from someone else. "What can I say, about my greatest frenemy? I'd take my hat off to you, but then you'd have no idea who I am,"

A chorus of laughter follows . Heinz harrumphed, briefly looking away to stubbornly insist that he "Doesn't get it." But Perry does not miss the distrustful twitch of his lips.

God he can't do this. Perry takes in a deep breath.

"There are many things you continue to surprise me about, my friend," Perry continues, and he watches in real time as Heinz both blooms and flinches in anticipation of his next words. "But most astonishingly is how you…can twist your mind into such horrible directions."

A confused silence ensues. Someone yells out a demanding "What?" that breaks the man's confused daze.

"Yeah, what?" Asked the man of the hour. "Are you saying I think in a really evil way, or are you just calling me dumb?"

The former, Perry knows, would be a compliment the man sorely needs, but it would not be an accurate one.

Perry isn't interested in playing this stupid game. "Neither. Heinz, look around you. Don't you see?" Perry's mouth pursed tightly. "You are surrounded by friends."

There is a perceptible change in the air, punctuated by muttering and distressed whispering. Perry exhales loudly. "Do you really think all of us genuinely think so lowly of you?"

Heinz scowls, confused. His eyes dart to and fro, but they eventually land back to him. They always do.

"Some friends. I don't have any friends.That's half the point we've been making all day."

"I'm your friend." Perry says, a little desperately, but it isn't about him. "Heinz, you insist that the people you surround yourself with think of you in ways you already think of yourself in that too big brain of yours, that you don't see the affection and respect of the people who like having you around. This event is your idea. Do you think people would have thought about anything cruel we've said if you hadn't said you wanted to hear it? "

" There were plenty of volunteers."

"We're an outgoing group who like to help one another! Heinz, look," Perry scowls back. "I don't agree with everything Darcy said, but she was right about one thing. Your biggest enemy is, and always has been, yourself. You tend to think of yourself as a being a failure, as being hated. But that isn't true."

"Yeah!" Marcy yells helpfully from the crowd, followed by some pointed hushing. She doesn't seem to notice. "I do actually think you're talented, Dr. D!"

"I think you're really fun!" Someone adds.

"You always know when to stop when we ask."

"You really rock a labcoat, too, Dr. D!"

"I actually like your shoulders!"

The auditorium grows loud, as more and more chibis cheerfully add their kind, honest opinions of the man in the throne. It seems to throw him off, and he looks panicked, shocked, and heartbreakingly, astoundingly confused.

"Wait, WAIT! Everybody STOP. You guys were supposed to make fun of me!"

"We can keep making fun of you if you like, Dr. Doof." Star answers happily. " If you want, but it's all in good fun, right?"

"That doesn't mean we don't think you're also really cool, Dr D. " Mabel adds cheerfully. She has her little piglet in her arms, rocking him affectionately back and forth. " I do it with my brother all the time! I still love him to bits and bits."

From behind one camera, Dipper makes an embarrassed sound. He's still smiling, and Mabel comes around to tug him into a hug, sandwiching Waddles in the middle.

"But that-," Heinz began to sputter indignantly. Somewhere far below, there is a grinding, whining noise. Perry frowns. "But you-! But what about-what about-what about my, hey, what about my doctorate, huh? I bought it off the internet for 15 bucks! My teachers hated me! Im not actually a Doctor."

"We both know you never needed one to prove yourself more than capable of breaking the laws of physics on the daily." Perry chirps drily. There is another chorus of laughter for the not-quite-insult. "And I'm the last person to make fun of you for enjoying a spot of alliteration. Hello, Perry the Platypus?"

"Hey!" Heinz shouts, as the crowd continues to giggle. "This is my roast! Get in line!"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Perry coughs into his fist, hiding a smile. " Where were we? Ah, yes, embarrassing you."

Heinz harrumphed, slouching back down into his seat in the assumption that the self loathing party was about to continue apace. Perry clears his throat. "Let's talk about how much you love your daughter."

Heinz shoots straight up, hands clenched into the sides of his seat. He looks, for a second, genuinely hurt, and angry. But Perry meets his gaze dead on, and the man eventually unclenches himself enough to speak, taking a deep breath as he looks away. "Fine. Fine. Whatever. There's nothing you're about to say that will make me feel even a little bit ashamed of how much I love my Vanessa."

"Yes, that is quite the pickle, isn't it? You, Heinz Doofenshmirtz," his voice turns soft despite his best efforts, feeling his cheeks burn fondly in reminiscence. "Are one of the strongest, kindest, sweetest parents I have ever had the pleasure to meet in my life."

Heinz blinks, caught off guard once again as the crowd goes "Awww,"

"You are embarassingly loving, you never let yourself forget the things she tells you she enjoys, even if they're gifts she asked for when she was barely a child. You are protective and vindictive of anything that could possibly come to hurt her, and you have never, ever, ever once forgotten to throw her a birthday, even when you've never had a decent one yourself in all your life,"

And finally, finally, Heinz blushes. A tint of red for being pleasantly flustered instead of the ashamed flush from before. The chibis laugh, coo and yell in playful disgust. Perry smiles smugly, pleased for having turned the tide of the event on its head.

From beneath their feet, the rumble grows, and the whining increases in fever pitch. Chibis begin to jump in surprise, the sounds of joy and celebration turning into ones of distress. Quite tellingly, Heinz looks perfectly unbothered, arms crossed petulantly. Perry raises an eyebrow.

There is a distant boom, muffled by a safe wall of dirt. One part of the stands collapses in on itself, and the chibis get off of it hurriedly. There is an ensuing silence.

Perry and Heinz had not, even once, looked away from one another. Perry leans on his elbow on the podium, raising his second eyebrow. Heinz slumps down his seat.

"Fine. I had an inator that was being charged by the negative energy of insults to take over the chibiverse, yada yada yada. It was supposed to be Platypus proof, because I didn't have time to put a self-destruct button. You jammed the energy input and made it explode by calling me nice things, happy?"

"Delirious." Perry answers, as the crowd cheers in celebration, another scheme thwarted, and another day saved.

The crowd climbs the stage in droves, chanting his name. Perry lets them have their fun, though he's not particularly enjoying being thrown into the air and carried over their heads, off the stage, to the backstage buffet.

He slinks off the second he was able to get away with it, to where Heinz was still curled on the throne in the auditorium hall, scribbling into his inventions book. He's not noticed Perry approaching, peeking over his shoulder to see he was already brainstorming his next scheme for molecular chibiverse domination, muttering angrily to himself.

"-tupid to think he actually meant what he was saying, I should've kept my lid on the plan better, hide my blueprints-,"

"I did, you know." Perry interrupts, and Heinz jumped, clutching the notebook close to his chest. "Meant them, I mean."

Heinz sighs gustily, posing like he's meant to retort something clever, but he's not sure what it is, yet. To render Heinz Doofenshmirtz speechless was no easy feat, adding another tally to Perry's accomplishments this day.

Not that he was ever unappreciative of Heinz's chatty nature.

After opening his mouth and closing it a couple more times, the doctor blurts; "I don't think I'll ever get used to that. You, talking, I mean."

Perry shrugs, self-conscious. Heinz adds, hurriedly, "I didn't say I didn't like it."

Perry tilts his head in question.

"I'll get used to it," Heinz assures, a bit shyly. It's making Perry blush too.

The agent shakes his head. " I don't think…, "

Heinz frowns. "You don't like it? "

Perry shrugs. "I don't need it. " He looks down. "I have you. "

He's not looking, so he isn't able to tell what expression Heinz might be wearing in the following silence.

Heinz breaks it eventually. "You keep doing this, you know?"

When Perry looks up, Heinz had donned a poorly executed scowl. It makes him smile. "Reminding me about the good things. Call me nice, I mean. That's not right. It's ruining my street cred."

The idea of Heinz having a street cred makes him laugh, and even if he does not enjoy most of the actual talking for now, this was nice. Laughing together, and being able to communicate, thoroughly and well, what exactly he adored of his best friend, uninhibited of Heinz's own self-esteem issues.

I love you, Perry wants to say, desperately. He wants to say it more than anything in the world, but even with all the communicative technology at his disposal, he is still hesitant, still scared, of putting his vulnerability into words.

Later, he keeps telling himself. Soon. Eventually. He reaches out to hold Heinz's hand in his own, leadened with all the words he can't bring himself to say.

Heinz smiles, and squeezes like he understands him anyway. Like Perry would have all the time in the world.

It can wait.

[puppiesareperfect]

Tri-state trilogy of terror 2 should I literally have a pitch for each individual segment:

1) “Ghost-busted”—Candace sets up a camera to try and catch the boys but they notice a ghost is messing with their stuff and drop what they’re doing to catch it meaning all Candace has to show is proof of a ghost (but that’s not what she was going for)

2) “Perry the platy-plus Perry the platypus”—due to shenanigans an evil clone of Perry shows up at DEI and Doofenshmirtz has an existential crisis about which one to zap to another dimension bc “well in movies they zap the evil clone but I’M evil so should I zap the original?” (shocker: he chooses normal Perry) (either that or a Doofenshmirtz clone appears and the Perry clone starts fighting with it, therefore resolving the issue)

3) “Black reflective glass” (get it?)—Phineas and Ferb make some sort of robot helper that for some reason wants to be evil but none of its robot features really work with that (ex. It has laser eyes expect it’s just a laser pointer so it can help people with cat sitting). It modifies itself but gets bored with evil and decides that it’s true passion is something ridiculous and out of left field like. Being a professional bird watcher or something.

Anyway these are my ideas, give us more Halloween episodes PLEASE

[nobodyfamousposts]

How would Littlebug react to characters like Doofenshmirtz? Or Jack Fenton?

(In Doofenschmirtz's living room...)

(Doofenschmirtz and Littlebug are having tea.)

Doofenschmirtz: …all that to say, I am kind of off the market for an arch nemesis, though I do appreciate the offer! But I promised Perry the Platypus that I wouldn't take on another arch nemesis and then I promised my daughter, Vanessa, that I would stop my acts of villainy after she made me see that it wasn't actually healthy or what I really wanted in life. And now I'm helping out at OWCA, supporting my daughter, and sharing my non-evil inventions meant to help the world instead of trying to settle petty grudges. So I am sorry, but I hope we can still be occasional rivals or maybe allies?

Littlebug: (Confused)

Littlebug: (Looks down at List)

Littlebug: (Looks up at Doofenschmirtz and points to name on the List)

Doofenschmirtz: (Looks at the name) Oh! I see where the mixup is! I'm Dr. Doofenschmirtz! Mr. Doofenschmirtz is actually my father!

Littlebug: (Tilts head)

Doofenschmirtz: Well you see, a lot of my villainy has been related to my backstory…backstories. You see, back when I was…

(15 Minutes later.)

Doofenschmirtz: (Still going)

Littlebug: (Eye twitching)

Doofenschmirtz: And then there was the time I was shamed for not jumping off the high diving board and—wait, where are you going?

Littlebug: (Leaves)

Doofenschmirtz: Okay! Well feel free to drop by again sometime! What a strange girl.

(Suddenly, Perry the Platypus bursts in.)

Doofenschmirtz: Perry the Platypus! I'm not evil anymore! What are you doing coming in through my window?

Perry: (Chitters and pulls up a screen showing Littlebug)

Doffenschmirtz: Oh, the little living doll thing. Yes, she just left.

Perry: (Looks around warily and chitters)

Doof: What? No! She was perfectly nice!

Perry: (Gestures to Doof)

Doof: Oh, it turned out she actually wasn't looking for me, she was looking for my father.

Perry: (Worried)

Doof: What? What harm could she do?

TV Announcer: This just in! An attack in Gimmelshtump as an elderly citizen is being dangled from a rope off the condemned diving board at the old community pool.

Doof: (Eyes widen) …oh.

-----------------------

(In another universe, in the Fenton household...)

Jack: (Going to the kitchen when he sees a piece of fudge on the floor) Floor fudge!

(As he picks up the fudge, he notices another piece on the floor and proceeds to pick that up as well.)

(Then he notices another piece.)

(And another.)

(He follows the trail of fudge all the way into the basement and leading to the Fenton Stockades.)

Jack: And that's the last piece! (Picks up the piece inside the Fenton Stockades)

(The door slams shut on him, trapping him in the Fenton Stockades.)

Jack: HEY! Who's there?! Let me out!

Littlebug: (Nods resolutely and marks Jack Fenton's name off The List and starts to leave the Lab)

Voice: Ahem?

Littlebug: (Turns)

(Danny is standing there.)

Danny: You're not another ghost sent by Vlad to kill my dad, are you?

Littlebug: (Shakes her head and shows him her Bad Dad List)

Danny: Why is my dad on this list?!

Littlebug: (Gestures to the Fenton Stockades with a flat look)

Danny: Okay, I know that looks bad. But he's a good dad, really!

Littlebug: (Frown)

Danny: Look, I know he's fought me, but that's only because he doesn't know I'm half-ghost. And the times he found out, he was pretty supportive. I mean, there were situations going on at the time, so we didn't really get to talk it out, but he still seemed to care about me. Even in an alternate reality where I accidentally erased my existence.

Littlebug: (Uncertain)

Danny: If you want to look for bad dads, you should see Vlad Masters. He keeps wanting to kill my dad, marry my mom, and make me his son like some sort of twisted setup of Hamlet.

Littlebug: (Eyes widen)

Danny: So yeah, there are already enough plots against my dad, so I'd really appreciate if you—wait, where are you going?

Littlebug: (Holds up The List, now with Jack Fenton scribbled out and "Vlad Masters" written in on it)

Danny: ....you know what? Have fun.

(They leave.)

...

...

Jack: Hello? Anyone?

[onawhimsicot]

HELLO I wrote a supervillain!Tango + superhero!Jimmy AU fic for the @mcytblraufest​​ where Tango is essentially Dr. Doofenshmirtz....so Jimmy is lowkey Perry the Platypus lol

Shockingly, it's not a Crack AU, but I have been describing it to everyone as “not a Phineas and Ferb AU...but it’s not NOT a Phineas and Ferb AU?” LOL This is the longest thing I have ever written (the initial estimate was 11k..let’s just say it’s not that anymore) It's a fic full of silly fun times, so please check it out!

Please check out the amazing works of art that got made for my fic!!! @quilldesignz​ made this gorgeous piece and @arofundy​ made the most adorable game!!!!!

This was beta’d by @vesperaink (fun fact: the idea of the AU was initially created for her birthday, so it wouldn’t exist in more ways than one if not for her!)

As the supervillain Dr. Blaze, Tango has a penchant for oddly named "-ificators" and stylistic flair. His goals include trying to take over the city, shaming superheroes for their basic costume designs, and then sending said heroes home with better equipment that actually matches their aesthetic because clearly, if he wants a cool fight scene to happen, he's got to do everything around here himself.

For some reason, not many people think he’s evil. His one comfort though is that his nemesis, the superhero Canary, does and has made it his personal mission to bring down Dr. Blaze.

But when Canary suddenly goes missing, his superhero partner, Parrot, is convinced that Tango is at fault. Seeing as this is not true at all (kidnapping is so gauche), Tango is offended that someone is trying to steal his nemesis right from under his nose. If Tango wants to get his nemesis back, he'll have to work together with Parrot to find and rescue Canary from whatever danger he's got himself into this time.

After all, what's a supervillain without a nemesis?

[ominous-feychild]

✦ Character Voice Tag ✦

Following tag from @honeybewrites!

Characters from Sun and Shadow: Freya, Crow, and Daleira Characters from the Arcane Rifts: Gene, Tazin, and Mislav

Lines to be used: - "Move over! I wanna watch too." @honeybewrites - "A little help, please?" @the-golden-comet - "Unhand me!" @the-letterbox-archives - "Okay, someone has to come up with a plan" @fractured-shield

"Move over! I wanna watch too."

Freya: "Move! Ugh--please, sorry!" *has already shoved her way past* Crow: *teleported through shadows to get to a better vantage point* Crow: "Excusez-moi!" *at the same time as slapping them aside with their wing* (note: they are not French.) Daleira: "Excuse me, please. I want to watch this too." Gene: "Uhm... ex-excuse me... please..." Tazin: "OUT OF THE WAY!" *meanwhile shoving people way more violently than necessary* Mislav: *way too quietly* "excuse me? I... excuse--vynost, I SAID MOVE!!!" *will shove if they haven't jumped out of the way of the screaming 9-year-old*

"A little help, please?"

Freya: "A little help over here!? Sooner rather than later???" Crow: "Ey! Over here! HELP!" Daleira: "Hey, could I get some help please?" Gene: *is not physically capable of asking for help* Gene: "Uhm... could-could I... please get some help?" Tazin: "Get your ass over here and HELP ME!" (note: read in a nasally, obnoxious 9-year-old's voice) Mislav: "hey, um... could I get some help? Please?"

"Unhand me!"

Freya: "what the--let go of me!" *will tear away from who/whatever grabbed her if she's able* Crow: *combat mode: engaged. Duck into their own shadows and teleport to get a moment to process the scene before reacting further.* Crow: *calmly, making eye contact* "you have less than five seconds to let go of me. Five. Four--" Daleira: *making eye contact, but trying to figure out if the grabbing was malicious or well-intentioned* "what's wrong." (hint: you do NOT want to be on her bad side.) Gene: *at the top of his lungs, voice cracking from under-use, and simultaneously yanking away with more strength than a 7-year-old should have* "LET GO OF ME!!!" (*panik attack*) Tazin: *insert unintelligible demonic screeching here. And imagine the grabber being set on fire. Because both will be the case.* Mislav: "LET GO OF ME!" *will yank away with, yet again, more strength than a human child should have. In fact, even more than a human adult if the grabber is intimidating. Will headbutt and leave a GNARLY bruise if necessary.*

"Okay, someone has to come up with a plan!"

Freya: "Guys??? What are we doing??? Don't tell me I have to figure something out!" Crow: *deadpan* "Don't make me break out Plan B. Trust me, you do NOT want Plan B." Daleira: *taking a deep breath and tying her hair back with a hairtie that JUST magically appeared* "alright, here's what we're going to do." Tazin: "GENE, COME UP WITH SOMETHING RIGHT NOW!!!" Gene: (regardless of whether or not ^^^ just happened) "I... I think I have an idea..." Mislav: "ohvynostpleaseno--does anyone have a plan??? Anyone??? Anything??? Ohvynostno--PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME HAVE TO USE IT!!!"

Your line: "Well, you see, Perry the Platypus, it all started on the day I (...) AND THAT'S WHY I PLAN TO CONQUER THE TRI-STATE AREA!" (in other words, if you don't want to Doofenshmirtz it, "This is why I'm about to do this No Good, Very Bad Thing. That is also why you are not going to stop me or change my mind." I thought it'd be fun with Doofenshmirtz's way, but either should work!)

Tagging (with no pressure) @darkandstormydolls @yourpenpaldee @.honeybewrites @.the-letterbox-archives (avoiding double-tags) and whoever else wants to join!

Divider from @cafekitsune

[phoebepheebsphibs]

Wait- you like Phineas and Ferb aswell?! Hehe

I

LOVE

Phoneas and Forb

It was legitimately my entire childhood. Me and my cousins watched the show non-stop and memorized the songs. I have two Perry the Platypus plushies, and a friend crocheted me an Agent P beby boi!

It was also the thing that helped me choose my dream job as animator! I had a lot of interests - specifically acting, drawing, and writing. After I found out that the creators of Phineas and Ferb were also Dr. Doofenshmirtz and Major Monogram, I realized that I wanted to do what they did! Create my own animated series and be an animator! That way, I could write the stories, I could act through the characters, and I could draw as much as I wanted!

[iprefertheterminsane]

Take me Home (Where I Belong)

I'm almost finished with my domestic perryshmirtz 5+1, which I'm gonna upload to ao3 soon so here's a tease in the form of the first chapter!

Rating: G

Relationship: Perry the Platypus/Heinz Doofenshmirtz

Tags: Human Perry the Platypus, pre-slash, domesticity, Perry's moved in before they even stopped calling themselves enemies, it's normal to want to kiss the homies sometimes, right?, long suffering Charlene, Perry's got 4 kids actually and that fourth one is Vanessa, haha Perry the Platypus you are dating my father.

Even after having his plans foiled for the day, Heinz doesn’t let him drive home.

“Look at yourself, Perry the Platypus, you’re barely standing on your own two feet.” The scientist points out. He’s right, of course, not that Perry will let him the satisfaction of agreeing with him. It seems to mean less than little; Heinz had already buckled him back into the passenger seat of his truck with the tenacity of a father, and Perry is just barely conscious enough to comply- a bit dumbly, but the taller man does not seem to mind-without much of a fuss. He’s still talking, naturally. Perry has gotten so used to the chatter the droning had begun to take on an ambient sort of feeling, like brown noise. “-practically an accident waiting to happen. Honestly, you’d think Francis would want to try keeping his best agent alive-that agency is gonna do you in better than I would, one day.”

Perry considers giving up a token protest-he had gotten here with the hoverjet on auto-pilot; the routes between the lair and Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc. has long been keyed in as his defaults-but decides otherwise. He really was quite exhausted, surely it would be no bother to let Heinz drive him back to Evil Inc. where he’s parked. Why waste fuel when a cheaper of transport was on offer? The Major has particularly been going on and on lately about turning the office more green and saving energy, no doubt one of their latest efforts to cut costs-so he was doing the agency a favor, really. He trusted that Heinz was a reliable enough driver when they’re neither forced to undergo the serial killing obstacle course that was the Drusselsteinian Driving Test Route.

He would sleep in just until Heinz gets them back home. Decision made, he lets himself rest his eyes.

00..00

“Up, up, up, Perry the Platypus you don’t really expect me to carry you up the stairs do you-,”

“-Ok, here we go, sit here-no, no, don’t lay down just yet you need to take your shoes off Perry the Heathenpuss-,”

“-I am not letting you sleep in the corset of a waistcoat Perry the Platypus, wow is this Kevlar? No wonder you can stand my Titanium punches-Ok uppies, I should probably help you take this tie off too, huh? They could strangle you in your sleep, y’know, nuff said, if nuff was-y’know, me-it’s so weird to see you so biddable, Perry the Platypus-,”

“-ok, last thing Perry the Platypus, yes I promise, just need to help you get under the covers, alright? Now, isn’t that better? Aw, look at how cute you look, Perry the Platypus, like a little angel-,”

“Good night, Perry the Platypus.”

00..00

Perry snorts awake in the penthouse guest room with the covers pulled up to his chin, blinking against the light of the setting sun from behind the half-shaded curtains facing east of Danville.

He isn’t sure what’s woken him, but finds himself unable to go back to sleep. This was probably a good thing-he’s never stayed behind in Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc. for so long without making his excuses before, and the clock shows that he’s nearly late for dinner back at the Flynn-Fletcher’s household. He’ll have no trouble flying home now, he feels perfectly well-rested.

Rising to his feet, he finds himself underdressed. His hat rests on the right-hand nightstand, right next to his sleeping head, and the rest of his clothes-vest, tie and shoes-draped carefully over the chair that looks like it’s been dragged over from the kitchen, positioned right next to the room’s entryway, deliberately left ajar. He shoves the hat back over his head and toes his shoes back on, but blinks deliberately at the rest of his attire. They are, of course, crucial parts of his armour, but what was to fear for stepping out without them? Heinz’s scheme was thwarted for the day, and lest the man was suddenly overcome with another plan while Perry was out, which he sincerely doubts, Heinz would not have reason to attack him out of the blue, and certainly not out of armour. He was obsessed with playing fair, and acting by the book. As far as they are both concerned, they were now both off the clock.

Perry decides to take the clothes and fold them over his arm, but he steps out without putting them on- the vest tends to cinch, which he tolerates, but not without reason-and goes to search for his host to make his goodbyes.

It’s easy enough to find him; Heinz is in the kitchen, naturally, making dinner for himself, with Norm at the dining table carefully slicing vegetables and making prep; something doughy, it seems. Perry wonders if it’s pie-Heinz makes wonderful doonkleberry pie. He rests his hips against the doorjamb, and chatters his teeth to make his presence known, a noise Heinz is well familiar with. It cuts off the man’s mindless chatter, and he beams. Perry can’t help his own answering smile.

"Ah, Perry the Platypus!” He crows. “Just in time for dinner! I don’t suppose you mind setting the table, just need to give me another couple of minutes-,” he cuts himself off as he sees Perry shaking his head, and Perry signs, regretfully, that he has to make himself scarce.

“YOU AREN’T STAYING FOR DINNER?” Norm asks, as despairingly as his cheerful-sounding robotic voice could make it sound. His mouth is down turned.

“Yes, it’s already so late, Perry the Platypus, surely your report could wait a couple of more hours.” Heinz adds, cajoling. “I worry you know, a man has to eat homemade meals every couple of days, else you tend to get sick to the stomach. I don’t know if you cook. I’ve made lemon pie for dessert.” Heinz sing-songs enticingly at the end, and Perry has to admit it’s persuasive. The man really does have a knack for baking.

But he’s already missed out on family dinner yesterday, due to making up for Agent G’s maternity leave, and the Flynn-Fletchers would worry if he missed out on another. He knows for a fact Linda’s made her award-winning meatloaf tonight, and hedgehog cake for supper. He’d hate on missing out on the treat for the world.

He’s halfway through realizing he’s said it out loud, ‘I have homemade meals at home,’ before he freezes, taking in Norm’s and Heinz’s curious blinks, and his hands pause abruptly, letting the sentence trail off awkwardly. He could see from the look on Heinz’s face that he was curious, mouth opening as if to pose a question, but seems to ultimately decide against it. They’ve both scrambled enough of the expected norms of their Villain-to-Spy nemesis-ship today, and crossing the line to figuring out Perry’s home life seems a midge too far, even for them.

Heinz hums, and changes the subject. “Are you really driving home fully dressed like that?”

Perry looks down at himself. ‘What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?’

“Nothing, which is my point. You could just leave them here, you know, they’re all dirty, Norm can run them through with the rest of the day’s laundry, and you can pick them up tomorrow. It’s weird to see you all dressed down, you know, but not bad weird, a good weird, makes me feel like a good host. That’s how you know you’re an adult sometimes, ugh, just listen to me talk about good hosting etiquette, Vanessa never has to worry about that sort of thing you know, even though she should. I hope Charlene’s teaching her.”

Perry’s wandered over to the coffee machine at this point, using context clues to figure out how it works and avoiding the large red button in a transparent case on the right-hand side of it’s case. He taps it, and churrs again.

“Oh, coffee! That’s a good idea, Perry the Platypus, some strong caffeine to help drive you through that traffic, I bought this travel mug for you!” Heinz hands him a short and stout chrome and teal travel mug with a silicone top and an anti-slip base. “I saw that color while scrolling through Etsy while I was looking at bento-boxes for this scheme I’m cooking up next week-oop, forget I said that Perry the Platypus, no spoilers! It reminded me of you! But the travel mugs aren’t related, it was just in the same shop, I love travel mugs, especially these newer novelty ones, you know there were never any novelty items back in Drusselstein, on account of the state largely frowning on any sort of color or patterns-,”

Perry churrs again, twisting the top of his cup back on and pointing out the door. Heinz visibly deflates.

“Oh, right, yes, leaving, of course, Perry the Platypus, let me just let this simmer and walk you to the door-and leave the clothes with Norm, Perry the Platypus, I’ve told you, you can come to fetch them tomorrow.”

Heinz helps hold the mug for him while he gets himself settled back in the hoverjet, and the clock on his dash informs him he should reach the house just in time to reach the Flynn Fletchers begin dinner if he rushed. Heinz leans forward to hand him the travel mug, leaving them close, just close enough that Perry feels the ridiculous urge to-maybe-leave a soft kiss on the other man’s cheek, the way Lawrence does when Linda was about to leave the house for the errand of the day.

Heinz doesn’t seem to notice, mumbling about setting the mug just right into the cupholder behind the handlebar, because it was hot, Perry the Platypus, we wouldn’t want a repeat of the driving test incident, do we? When Perry switches the jet on, Heinz waves. Perry, inexplicably, tips his hat back in return.

It isn’t until he’s 15 minutes away from the house that he realizes he really had left his vest and tie behind at Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc. He hopes Heinz doesn’t plan to do anything inadvisable with them.

For some reason, Perry doesn’t believe that he will.

[instantpansies]

and so it begins

First Chapter!!! Most Recent Chapter!!!

as we all know, Perry the Platypus won the @hellsite-hungergames and killed @hellsite-hall-of-fame.

the first polls, in which you people chose: - third person - author's notes in the middle of text - weird epithets to denote speakers - smirking

i'll be working on the first few chapters as i have time and releasing them one by one on ao3. my user is twenty_four_manticores and i'll be releasing this fic under the pseud instantpansies!

example of what we can all look forward to here. (holiday special sneak peek here)

current ship names in running: Pellsite, Perrysite, S.W.C.N. (Ship Without a Cool Name) - compiling a suggestion list and will run again with new options in a bit. round one poll

giving perry a tragic backstory here and here.

y'all decided i shouldn't refamiliarize myself with the og hunger games here.

messing with povs, decided here.

capital building doorway message here

i'll be releasing additional polls throughout the writing process to really crowdsource this fic. it'll be so much more authentic that way. they'll be released at random times but i'll have a featured tag on my blog with all the posts related to this fic. updates will follow.

finally, i will be open to all suggestions at any point! if we have a lot of people asking for things i'll make a poll! tell me what you want and i'll make an effort to get it in there, no promises though.

guidelines: hellsite-hall-of-fame has asked to keep this fic relatively sfw. while there will obviously be some violence and MCD, we're keeping this strictly smutless. pg-13, people, i'm rating this fic T on ao3!

tags to search on my blog if you only want to see fic content: - #enemies to lovers angst hurt no comfort 200k hellsite hall of fame x perry the platypus (all) - #the fic (all) - #LORE (things i might add later/won't be in the story but might help add some texture as i'm writing. mainly stuff from blogs involved acting in-character) - #hellsite hall of fame - #perry the platypus - #hellsite hunger games - #fic polls (if you only want to see polls) - #fic suggestions (anything y'all give me to work with that isn't in a poll!) - #chapter announcements

also, all pnf/mml/hng/etc posts are organized under #dwampyverse, not their own individual tags (except perry the platypus and dr doofenshmirtz)

disclaimers below cut

please note: i am a student with a ridiculous schedule and adhd. i make absolutely no promises to update this fic in a timely fashion.

fair warning: i've written fanfic before on my main pseud (twenty_four_manticores). i don't write smut but i occasionally write ~weird~ things. if you have a problem with any of my writing i don't care, send anon hate right here on tumblr dot com and i'll defend myself (or not) as i see fit.

what the hell am i doing. i write oneshots. i don't have the attention span for this. oh no. oh no

[doofsimp]

"It's still quite early…" Dr Doofenshmirtz says to his assistant, looking at his wrist watch while, and holding a broom with the other hand. "Yes Mr Doofenshmirtz. Perry was quick today…" She says next to a trash can, where she just put some trash out. "Hunf… Curse you Perry the Platypus… -The evil scientist says, shaking his fist in the air - But anyways! There's this new Ice Cream shop down the street! I wanted to go there. They have lactose free Ice Cream and a bunch of flavors, from all around the world. I heard they have Drusseinstein's Doonkelberry flavor!" Dr Doofenshmirtz says excitedly. "Oh that sounds great! I hope you have a good time there. I'll be waiting here until you're back." Eda says shyly. "What are you talking about? Come on, let's go before it closes down!" He grabs his assistant’s hand and takes her outside his lab in the direction of the elevator. Eda looks very embarrassed at him, but follows him while trying to hide her embarrassment. Dr Doofenshmirtz is smiling all happy while going down the elevator, they don't talk much, until they get there, but it's clear they enjoy each other's company.

"What?! Doonkelberry is out of stock?!?! No, I wanted that one! Don't you have any other flavor from Drusseinstein?" Dr Doofenshmirtz is disappointed after the bad news. He looks defeated and goes to talk with his assistant, but she's distracted, looking at some flavors. He looks at the flavors she's looking at. "Are those from your country?" Eda nods and says "I used to like that one a lot" she says pointing to one called 'Raisins in rum'. "Rum huh? I didn't know you…" Eda interrupts him: "No no! I don't drink at all. But that flavor, it was very sweet…" Dr Doofenshmirtz smiles, and says: "We should get some then! - He looks at the cashier and murmurs - I wonder if they may have garlic ice cream…"

A little after… "They didn't have garlic ice cream… So I settled for Mint chocolate chips and chocolate… You got that one you wanted?" He says sitting down. "Yes, I got it and strawberry." "Ah nice, everyone seems to like strawberry flavor right…" He smiled, but for some reason, he didn't know what else to say, but he sat there smiling at her. It was a bit awkward. Eda looks down, embarrassed again, she decides to get her spoon and she also says "I never had mint chocolate chip before." "Oh!" He promptly got a bit of it on his spoon and said "You should try it then, it's good!" He reaches for her face with the spoon, then both of them blush. He realizes that was kinda awkward, but he says "If…If you want of course…" Eda is blushing a lot, she replies quickly "Y-Yes! But… But you gotta try mine too… I mean… if you want to!!!"

"I want it!" He replies quickly. They are still blushing, but they each get a little bit of ice cream on their spoons and give to each other on their mouths without even thinking they could have just let each other get a little bit without being so silly and awkward.

*ahem* sorry I'm just getting back to writing lately...

[agentlizardofowca]

🤲🏼🤲🏼🤲🏼 for the writer ask prompt. 7 and 8 ple

-MoA

How tragic @mammalsofaction was brutally murdered whilst typing this ask, and wasn't alive long enough to finish it 😢 I shall answer anyway to honor her memory

7. Share the first line of your 5 most recently published fic (why the tedious one?! What have I done to deserve this?) Doofenshmirtz Heirloom theft: The weather channel had been broadcasting only one thing for days; Summer Storm Paula would arrive today. The Misconception: During preliminary testing of the switcheroo-inator, Heinz Doofenshmirtz accidentally fired it out his window. I'll be honest with you: "Gentlemen, how nice of you to hang around." Agent Perry the Platypus and Agent Heinz the Ocelot exchanged glances.

(Got bored, if you wish to read the first line of the other ones, check my Ao3. Leave kudos plz)

8. Share the last line you wrote

(ooOOOoohh the drama) "You're uncomfortable!" Heinz retorted, and he realized that he was shouting. "Be honest with me Perry, you can't stand to be here!"

「That's not true!」 Perry signed quickly, but Heinz's attention was not on his hands.

"I know. I KNOW I'm not good at social clues but I am not stupid! If you don't want to be with me then just leave!"

[fried-eggs152]

What are your Phineas and Ferb ships and how do you imagine their dynamics? Love your blog btw! :)

I saw this question and suddenly I wasn’t as tired as I thought I was I sat up and ran to the kitchen I felt like entrapta

(Thank you so much)

OK OKOK!! I have a couple in hand not much but some :D (I went on a rant I’m so sorry)

Let’s start with my two obvious favourites

1. Buford x phineas, sure bully x nerd cliche but this is a different type of relationship I see.

Slowly but surely they become close friends and even buddies, I feel like Buford would be a the same just less defensive with phineas and his random unhinged moments. Usually listening phineas rant about what seems to be a bug (or other things) and what type of bugs he’s allowed and not allowed to eat (summer belongs to you episode), and Buford would talk about his fish they both could keep each other going if they didn’t have their best friend (baljeet and ferb) they can remind each other of the small things they forget say perhaps phineas waking up as early as Buford does. Or reminding Buford to take care of himself once in a while that type of thing. As much as Buford tried to be a bully he has a limit of being a bully and honestly he isn’t so bad of a guy and I can see phineas reading that pretty well.

Their dynamic would be like..not like baljeet and Buford’s it just as much as a symbiotic relationship but a lil differently. Clownfish and anemones!!! That’s their relationship! Buford’s the anemone and phineas is the clownfish! (Ironic because of his shirt) it’s healthy and they keep each other going and safe! (Also phineas would prolly help with biff alot)

2. Perry the platypus x Peter the panda

Yeah I know I doubt Perry likes Peter after doof ‘cheated’ on him with Peter but when they work together (when they saved doofenshmirtz) I feel like Perry’s bitterness would fade slowly. (Also the time they went on a date when they fixed the balloon) as it did happen. Perry would find a way to get Peter in the picture, long term relationship wise. Their dynamic is kinda like ‘I secretly love you but I have to much of a lone wolf ego to say it’ and Peter ‘I know.’ Peter understands Perry’s relationship with Heinz and respects what was probably said boundary wise. The two having to listen to their nemesis or not listen it would be nice to just be with someone you can open up to even if it means in your own agency. And different species. It’s like a..hero x hero typa thing! They can keep each other up and going if their nemesis gets abit..much..I also feel like he’s be texting Peter on how stupidly naive Heinz could be and Peter rant about mysterious (what’s his name) being too closed off to open abit more.

Ok this one is especially weird- like ‘wtf 🤨’ weird

3. Lawrence x Heinz; OK hear me out (pls)

They had one interaction (when Lawrence temporarily became evil..it didn’t last) I didn’t think of it, it’s the dynamic I thought of.

Lawrence watching as Heinz talks to himself about it some platypus and the explosion leaving marks behind he would probably tend to the dirt and messes. Listening to Heinz rant and rant and rant- and when Heinz is done he’d ask for Lawrence’s info about antiques and such and they’d just share each others special interest (ADHD + Autism) and he’d take care of norm every once and awhile so Heinz doesn’t flip out on him. It’s healthy and Heinz would be so affectionate (probably) AND ferb would get to meet Heinz which works out to help Heinz make some fun inator’s (not evil Heinz’s attention would be on ferb and Lawrence’s safety his own is irrelevant) Lawrence would be oblivious to the evil but not to oblivious to see the inator’s. He’d prolly go “what is this dear?” -L

“It’s my new inator that vines down to a traumatic period of my life!” -H

“That’s healthy to put it in scientific technology. Do you want to talk about it over some almond brittle and tea?”-L

“You know me so well” -H

IT WOULD BE ADORABLE. (In my eyes)

4. Buford x ferb.

Alright almost the same thing as BxP but ferb’s silent demeanour would probably have an affect with Buford’s bully behaviour. Like put them in a room together Buford would say a couple mean things then suddenly he’s quiet. Almost sleepy at this point. Then suddenly ferb says one fact and Buford adds on to that fact and suddenly they’re having a one sided conversation as Buford debates said fact and ferb debates silently.

One would be the voice of the other (Buford being ferbs voice) about what’s right or wrong.

(Not much on this ship tbh)

5. Baljeet x phineas the two’s dynamic is simple and easy!

Anddd baljeet would be there to fix little mistakes phineas would do (Audhd) and phineas would be sorta annoyed but literally happy he doesn’t think about that small mistake for the rest of his life.

Another symbiotic relationship. Unknown animals though I’d say Coyote and badger, both smart in their own ways.

Almost about It maybe Isabella one day attention for her x someone

Maybe a fireside girl

Alr let me think some more

[mammalsofaction]

Hi I wanted to ask you about a fanfic idea? You don’t have to answer this but I have a couple ideas and I’ve been to busy to really put it to use.

You know in the movie into the 2nd dimension where Perry’s able to hold up 2 kids, 1 teen, and a fully grown evil scientist. I thought of the idea of what would happen if his host family saw that or if he got a bit to rough with Dr d during a fight.

You might have already had this idea or have even already done it but i thought it would be a fun short fic or something.

Early Days

Rating: G

Relationships: Bg Lawrence Fletcher/Linda Flynn-Fletcher

Characters: Linda Flynn-Fletcher, Lawrence Fletcher, Perry the Platypus, Heinz Doofenshmirtz mentioned, Flynn Fletcher siblings mentioned

Add tags: Non graphic depiction of violence, non graphic depiction of injuries, family feels, light angst, PnF S1 Hail Doofania, human Perry the Platypus, mute Perry the Platypus

A/N: This takes place in the early days of Perry and Heinz's nemesis ship. In the episode Hail Doofania in S1, Perry spends almost the entire episode wearing a protective collar. His flashback shows us that Heinz pushed him down a sandpaper making factory that tore up the fur on his body, making Linda suspect he's scratching himself up due to some sort of rash.

In the human!Perry version, I take this further to mean that he's wearing some sort of neck brace, meaning that Heinz had--at some point early in their relationship--had hurt him quite bad. I thought it's fitting to fulfil the ask. Perry still calls Heinz 'Doofenshmirtz'.

This fic mainly centres around Perry's relationship with Linda and Lawrence, and how they worry for him. The boys are maybe 5 years old here, making Candace 10.

If you want to understand the reference to Ferb's mom, i recommend reading my human Perry lore post linked in my pinned post.

Im sorry this took so long @salty-frenchfry . Between life happening and my laptop going Ka-put, finding the time to properly address this ask took longer than I'd like. I never forgot it though! I hope this little short is ok 😭

---

In his line of work, injuries were unavoidable.

Often times, they were easy enough to hide. Bruises were most common. Perry's long since taken to keeping a spare set of make-up with a replenishable bottle of concealer on his person, whether that be the dash of his hovercar or the storage box beneath the seat of his scooter. And what the concealer couldn't hide, his sleeves and long trouser pants could.

He's good enough at what he does. That being said, sometimes Doofenshmirtz gets a lucky shot.

Linda stormed into his private ward like an avenging angel, and Lawrence trails behind her in a more sedate, nevertheless eager pace. The nurse, as well as a be-suited nameless OWCA insurance representative slips out silently to leave him to their harried concerns, though not before the former sends him a small smile for good luck. The married couple barely notices.

"What happened?" Linda demands. Lawrence makes himself at home in the bedside chair, letting his wife take charge of the mother henning for now. "The hospital told us you'd gotten involved in a car accident? Oh Perry, your handsome face." She cried, bottom lip wobbling, and if Perry didn't have his left hand in a cast and his body completely leaden with drugs, he would have reached out to reassure her. As it was, he could only attempt to do what he can with a strained smile.

He hadn't known, until this point, what excuse OWCA had given the Flynn Fletchers to obfuscate the circumstances surrounding the severity of his injuries, but he really should have guessed. OWCA loved car accidents. In truth, he'd lost his balance over the edge of a rooftop while fighting with Doofenshmirtz, and he'd somehow managed to push Perry over. Perry had fallen through a roof of a sandpaper making factory, down 20 feet onto some crates and toppling heavy machinery. He'd almost broken his neck, fractured his left wrist, dislocated his left knee joint (the side that had broken his fall) and his face looks like he'd gone 5 rounds with Mohammad Ali. Thankfully he'd found he'd managed to thwart Doofenshmirtz's scheme anyway (he'd thrown a shoe into the revealed gearwork of his Unpaved-Inator, a machine designed to revert paved walk lanes into unstable cobbled paths. As if Danville didn't suffer from enough sabotage in terms of accessible walkable infrastructure), so at the very least, it was not a complete failure. The paperwork would've been impossible, instead of just insufferable.

He'd been given a voice to text machine by his bedside by his functional hand, a small voice box in respect to his disability, and he uses it to lie in it's emotionless vaguely feminine robotic voice. "T-boned into a truck running a red light." He says. OWCA would take this lie and run with it later. "Thrown onto the road. Think it slipped."

Linda and Lawrence made appropriately sympathetic noises. When Perry lolled his head to the side, he realizes his brother-in-law looks far more haggard than he'd initially noticed; red rimmed eyes and a glassy smile. Stiff upper lip. Well. Ferb had gotten it from someone. "You'd scared the children out of their wits, Perry." He says quietly, likely to conceal the shaking in his voice. "They're waiting in the car as we speak. None of us had quite the appetite for dinner after we'd gotten the news."

The strained smile slips into a slightly more sincere, more painful smirk. "Just the kids?" Perry asked, and Lawrence barks in laughter that sounds far too similar to a sob.

He can't imagine what he sees, what it must've been for him to have gotten the news. OWCA had told him it was a car accident too, for Ferb's mother nearly 5 years ago to the dot, now.

He'd not even got to see the body, then.

His heart squeezes in guilt, an all too familiar ache. Lawrence had been through enough: the point of a stable nemesis ship was to avoid injuries of such a caliber. To provide stability, safety. Security. Perry didn't want Linda, didn't want the kids, to ever worry about whether he would come home, especially not with the line of work he tells them he's involved in.

A gentle knock on the door heralds a familiar face: a specialist Perry had seen once or twice walking down the corridors of OWCA's medical bay as an emergency field medic, sans the white fedora with a red band denoting his position within the organisation.

This time he was simply wearing a signature Doctor's lab coat, holding a clipboard and flanked by a pocky young adult in scrubs, buzzing with caffeine. "Flynn-Fletchers?" He requested gently. Linda makes an affirmative noise, and the duo welcomes themselves inside the ward with that familiar professional smile.

"He's got banged up pretty bad out there." The doctor offers in a vague, sympathetic manner. "Has he told you what happened?"

Perry thinks he sees Lawrence and Linda share an unreadable look. "A car accident." Lawrence echoes hesitantly. "With a truck?"

The unnamed doctor nods, writing something down on his clipboard, likely the cover story he would need to report back to Francis shortly. "The impact had broken his collar bones and given him a mild concussion." He reports. The pocky nurse at hands out a print of Perry's X-ray reports, and Perry watches the married couple analyse the given print like it was anything comprehensible. "He'd landed on his left side, fracturing his left wrist, up to the back of his ulna, so we're casting it for now. No surgery beyond the one we've done to his collarbones immediately upon his arrival to the AnE, which has already been covered by his work insurance."

This seems to surprise Linda. " As an accountant?"

The doctor doesn't even blink. "Seems like it. Good health insurance plan. We're assigning him to a couple more days in the hospital to watch over his condition, and about 2 months bedrest before he can go back to work. If everything goes smoothly, we can discharge him by the end of the week. Any questions?"

"Paid vacation?"

It's a question asked through the robotic monotone of Perry's given voicebox. The doctor gives Perry a secretive, sympathetic smile for the unspoken concerns he understands far too well. "I'm afraid you will have to ask your superiors. My influence remain within these walls, I'm afraid. But I'll put in a good word."

Perry sighs. It comes out weaselly and creaky, and Lawrence reaches forward to squeeze his uninjured shoulder in reassurance. "Thanks, doc." Perry says, because he wasn't an animal.

"My pleasure." He says, which must've been some sort of cue. The pocky nurse moves to exit, leaving them with the X-Ray prints, and holding the door open. "I'll let you get your rest, and you may refer to Consultation for any questions regarding visitation hours. We'll be able to greenlight him tomorrow."

Linda and Lawrence thank him, watching him leave before they redirect their attention back to Perry's prone form.

Linda has her lips pursed in displeasure. "Your boss doesn't really want you back so soon after your accident, would they?"

Perry sighs again. This time, the exhales brings his attention to his parched throat. "I can't say." He types into the voicebox. It's not the answer she was looking for, he can tell from the continued sour look of her face. Lawrence face becomes even more pained.

"Can you promise you won't be doing this again?" He requests, and while his throat and his guilt tears him from the inside out, Perry lets himself chuckle lightly.

"I can't help these things, Lawrence."

The silence that follows is heavy with things Perry feels they're both keeping from each other. Linda sits heavily in the chair next to her husband, and reaches out to squeeze his hand, hanging limply by the armrest. Lawrence looks him in the eye, pointedly silent, and he smiles something wane and unreadable.

"No," he says. "No, I don't suppose you can."