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cloudlessly-light · 1 year

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The greatest thing that I have achieved 5/10

Chapter title: For a little lie down with me

Summary: After Haley’s death, Aaron isn’t sure how to move on from the grief. Then one night, months later he finds himself falling into bed with Emily, his best friend and that changes everything. Word Count: 3,1k Rating: Explicit Warnings for this chapter: Grief, pregnancy, feelings, smut

“You’re really pregnant.” Penelope’s voice startles her as she turns from looking at herself in the full-length mirror. It was Dave’s birthday and he had invited them all over for dinner and the women took advantage of having some time without the company of men before the dinner. The blonde is holding a glass of red wine in hand while handling Emily a nonalcoholic drink she had made up in her kitchen.

“Gee you think?” She rolls her eyes but still takes her glass from Penelope.

“No I know you’re pregnant, but this is the first time you’ve worn clothes that shows it.” She looks at Emily up and down. She was wearing a knee length burgundy dress, tight enough to show off her small baby bump. She looks to Emily for permission as she reaches her hand out, but doesn’t touch her until Emily nods and her hand strokes over the dress. “Hey Peanut, it’s aunty Pen.”

“You don’t think I just look bloated?” Emily asks but still smiles as her friends talk to her stomach.

“You look beautiful.” She tells her just as JJ walks up the stairs.

“What is taking so long up here?” She asks but already has her answer when she sees Penelope’s hand on Emily’s stomach and Emily’s eyes drifting toward the mirror. She knew that look, it was the do I just look fat look and she’s quick to put a smile to her face. “Emily you look amazing.”

“Really?” Emily had never been very self-conscious, but with the changes to her body and her hormones running amuck it was hard to feel anything but a mess.

“Yes.” Both blondes say at the same time. “That’s your baby in there, growing, trust me this feeling is normal but you’re making Peanut feel safe in there.” JJ continues and Emily smiles gratefully at her.

“It’s going to be hard when we actually name the baby.” She takes a sip from the drink on her glass.

“I think Peanut is here to stay.” Penelope grins as they clink their glasses together. “It’s Dave’s birthday, but this cheer is to Peanut. And for boss man knocking you up.”

“Penelope!” JJ chastises her as Emily bursts out laughing, her pervious mood gone as quick as it came.

Aaron laughs as Dave tells another one of his insane stories, this one about when he won a game of darts against Sting in the 90’s. He sips the whiskey he’s sure is worth more than his watch as he watches the older man cook, Derek and Spencer on either side of him.

“Anyways, that was all a long time ago. Let’s focus on now.” Dave says as he pours onions into a pan. “How’s Emily doing? She doesn’t give much away.”

“The morning sickness, or all day sickness as she calls it has gotten better. We’re looking for a bigger place.”

“And you’re not together?” Spencer asks tentatively. It’s the one question most people ask about, that they’re having a baby and are planning on moving in together but aren’t actually together.

“No.” He takes a sip from his glass. “I want to be there for Emily and for the baby and living separately, with our job and Jack… I just feel like I wouldn’t have enough time.”

“It sounds like a disaster waiting to happen if you ask me.” Derek says and Aaron frowns at him.

“I didn’t ask you now did I?” He snaps, the questions and doubts from the people he considered his closest friends were starting to get to him and he was tired of it.

“Look Hotch I…”

“No you look. I’m going to be there for this child, and this is what we together decided was best. What you, or anybody else thinks, doesn’t matter.”

“Aaron,” Dave’s voice cuts through his irritation at Derek and he looks at the older man. “You don’t think we don’t see the way you look at her?”

“It’s not that easy, we can’t complicate things even more. It’s barely been a year since Haley died…”

“You love her Aaron, and that’s okay. Haley would have wanted you to move on.” Dave interrupts as he stares Aaron down. Derek nods along to what the older man was saying and Aaron sighs. He knows that they’re right, that he’s fooling no one but a part of him still wasn’t ready to move on, and that part seemed to scream at him. He doesn’t get the chance to answer, Penelope’s heels and happy voice suddenly sounding through the foyer and only a few seconds later she, JJ and Emily are walking into the kitchen.

“Happy birthday!” Penelope cheers, Emily and JJ close behind to hand him gifts and hugs. Once they were done, Emily goes to greet Spencer and Derek, saving Aaron for last.

“Hey.” She catches the way he’s looking at her up and down, ignores the tingle down her spine as she chalks it up to him not being used to her bump either.

“You look beautiful.”

The way her cheeks tint pink is much harder to ignore.

Somehow the meeting with Strauss ends up working out better than any of them had thought. There would be limitations for Emily in the field naturally, something that Aaron already had taken care of the day after he found out about her pregnancy. There was a stern talk about inappropriate workplace relationships and yet, somehow she had let them go with a promise to keep her updated if there would be any problems.

Aaron thought that the only reason why she didn’t come down on them was because she knew about Haley and the struggles the team had already been through and the fact that it had been a few months already and nothing had changed workwise.

“Looks like we’re in the clear.” Emily says as they’re walking back from her office towards the bullpen.

“Apparently so.” He holds the glass door open for her and forces himself not to put his hand on her lower back as she passes. “So we’re leaving at 5 to go look at that house. Jessica is meeting us there with Jack.”

“And you’re still sure? I can always stay at my apartment and we’ll figure it out from there.”

“I’m sure.” He promises for what could possibly be the twentieth time since they started talking about living arrangements. Emily felt like they were in some twistedly domestic fever dream sometimes, like they were playing house.

But Aaron had been adamant about wanting to be as big of a part in the baby’s life as possible and Emily would be lying if she said that it wasn’t what she wanted as well. She had grown up with a mom who was physically there but never had time for her and a dad who was away for travel more often than not and she would hate for her child to grow up in the same way.

“Okay, everything looks good, baby is coming along nicely for 18 weeks.” Their doctor told them at their appointment. She smiles at them and Emily already know what she’s about to ask. “Do you want to know the sex of the baby?”

“Yes.” She says eagerly, her hand firmly in Aaron’s and she sees him nod in her peripheral.

“It’s a girl.”

“You were right.” Aaron breathes as turns to look at her. “It’s a girl. We’re having a girl.”

“A girl.” She confirms and gently strokes his cheek as he looks at her with shining eyes. “Look at that Peanut, mommy was right.”

One thing that happened as they moved from the first trimester and into the second one, was that not only was Emily’s hormones making her quick to anger and tears, but they also made her body sensitive to the slightest touch. It was something she noticed around the fifteenth week, by the seventeenth week it was hard to ignore that every touch from Aaron made her feel hot, her body reacting to him in ways she never had before.

Then they’re moving into a house and she finds herself alone at night and just knowing that Aaron was just down the hall in his own bedroom made her sweat and center pulse with the dull ache of arousal.

She pads down to the kitchen one night to get some water, her body’s craving making it hard to sleep. She isn’t surprised when she hears Aaron coming down the stairs as she pours herself a glass of water. He stops at the sight of her, a large shirt and sleep shorts on her body and he fights the urge to stare.

“You okay?” He asks instead.

“Yeah just getting some water.” She holds the glass up. “Is Jack asleep?”

“Out like a light.” He smiles at the thought of his son. Jack had been happy to move, loved his new room and house and Aaron once again found himself amazed by his son.

“Good.” She breathed as she tried to ignore the heat between her legs as she looked at Aaron in nothing but his pajama pants, hair still wet from his shower.

“Are you sure you’re all right?” He saw the way her cheeks tinted, how her eyes darkened as she clung to the counter, her knuckles white. He recognized that look in her eye, months later, it was the same one on the dance floor and a memory sparked from when Haley was pregnant and her hormones were driving her crazy.

“I’m sure.” Emily tried to play it off but when Aaron took a few steps closer to her she could feel her breathing hitch. “I’m just… going a little insane I guess.”

“Hormones?” He asked as he kept some distance from her.

“Let’s just say I see the appeal of having a partner right now.” She tried to joke but it came out breathy and low and she saw his eyes darkening.

“That… yeah.” He swallowed hard and shook his head. “We should get to bed, get some sleep.”

“Aaron…” Her hand around his wrist stopped him from turning, her touch searing his skin.

“Em…” He whispered and she knew that he knew what was happening, that he was fighting whatever it was as well. “We shouldn’t, it’s a bad idea.”

“Please, just once? I need you.” Later she would deny the whine in her voice, the way she was literally begging for him. But it had been almost five weeks of craving his touch and tonight it seemed like her body couldn’t hold out anymore. She let go if his wrist only to interlock her fingers behind his head and breathed him in when his forehead fell against hers.

“I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret later.” He forces his hands to stay at his side, even when her lips graze his and everything in him told him to kiss her.

“I won’t regret this,” She promised with a small grin “it’s just a friend helping out another friend.”

He can’t help to laugh slightly at the blatant lie but then her lips are pressed against his and he can’t not kiss her back. His hands move from clenching at his sides to hold her waist and when Emily moans against his lips he knows that he wouldn’t fight this.

They make their way into his bedroom, his hands already tearing at her clothes. She kicks off her shorts as he tears the shirt over her head and for a moment he’s stunned. He looked at her up and down, took in the way her bump stood proud and he couldn’t help himself when he kneeled down to kiss it.

“Aaron.” She breathed, low and wanton as she made her way to his bed, dragging him along.

He wasted no time in undressing and laying down beside her. His lips found hers before moving down to her chest. When he sucked a nipple between his lips she let out a moan, loud and needy and she immediately covered her mouth with her hand to keep any more sounds muffled. When his fingers moved through her he was surprised to find her thighs sticky with arousal.

“You weren’t kidding.” He smirked as she arched into his touch, his fingers gently brushing over her clit.

Emily felt like her body was on fire, just from his simple touch. It was maddening, the want surging through her body but she knew that it was normal, but feeling her entire body tremble after only minutes of his rough fingers against her wasn’t what she had expected.

Aaron peppered her neck with kisses as he dipped his hand lower and pressed two fingers inside of her. He pressed the palm of his hand against her clit as he curled his fingers and Emily immediately strained against him.

“Fuck, fuck don’t stop.” She was clenching the sheets in one hand, the other was clawing at his back. “I’m so close.”

Aaron pushed his fingers harder inside of her, pressed against her clit and rubbed his palm over it roughly and when Emily’s body started to tense he was quick to catch her lips in a kiss. Her loud moan of ecstasy was muffled against his lips as her body shook against his. He felt her clench around his fingers, soak his hand and he could feel his own erection leak precum onto her thigh as he tried to control his own arousal.

Emily felt like she was floating when she finally came down, her body finally feeling some kind of release that her own hand hadn’t been able to bring her in weeks.

“That was so good.” She pants and pulls him into another kiss, softer than the previous ones. When he pulls back she sneaks her hand from behind his neck down his body but his hand around her wrist stops her.

“You don’t have to do that.” He tells her and he means it.

“I know, I want to.” She gets her wrist free only to wrap her hand around him. He’s hot and hard, precum leaking from the swollen tip and she smiles knowingly.

“Fuck.” He mumbles quietly as his forehead lands on her shoulder. Her hand felt too good around him and when her thumb swiped over the tip of him he had to hold back a groan. He only opens his eyes when he feels Emily shift beside him. “What are you doing?”

“Fuck me.” She whispers as she turns her back to him and presses close to him. “Aaron fuck me.” She feels him shifting behind her and then he’s moving to hold her thigh up as her legs spread for him.

“You sure?” He asks somewhere in between worry and arousal as he slides against her wet folds, the heat of her electric.

“So so sure.” She nods and moves her hand back to gently grasp at his hair. His lips find the back of her shoulder as he pushes inside of her and Emily’s eyes roll back at the feeling of him. He feels even better inside of her than she had remembered, even bigger than her alcohol induced brain had let her remember and she gasped at the stretch.

“Jesus.” Aaron breathes into the crook of her neck as he feels her clenching around him, soaked and hot and tight. He pulls out slowly, drags his hips lazily against hers, partly because he wants to remember every part of this, partly because he doesn’t want to hurt her. The hand not holding her thigh sneaks around her body and when he palms at her chest she arches into it with a breathy whine.

“Holy shit.” She grinds her teeth to keep from moaning too loudly, well aware of the little boy asleep down the hall. She pushes her ass back against him, tries to get him in deeper, needs him to go faster and when he finally does she bites her lip to keep from crying out.

“Good?” He huffs as he sets a rhythm, fucking into her with long strokes.

“So good, so fucking good.” She mumbles and she feels him smile into her neck. She lets go of his hair only to move it between her thighs. She rubs her clit in tight circles, hears Aaron groan her name in her ear and she shivers from it.

Her second orgasm is hard, so intense she’s afraid that she’ll black out from the pressure of it. But Aaron is right there, whispering soothing words in her ear until she’s coming down and he’s spurting inside of her with a muffled growl. Once he’s done he keeps his arm around her, gives them both a moment to come down before Emily turns in his arms.

“Thank you.” She smiles, a flush still on her skin as their touches turns lazy.

“Pleasure’s all mine.” He winks and she rolls her eyes at him but the smile doesn’t leave her face.

“I should get back to my room.” She says then and she tries to ignore that his face falls slightly at that.

“Yeah.” He squeezes her hip gently and then watches as she goes to grab her clothes from the floor. “Hey Em,” he says before she reaches his door. “we got this right?”

She looks at him for a moment, his question having a million answers.

“We got this.” She finally says before opening his bedroom door only to walk back to her own.

Haley,

I miss you. I miss you but it’s not in the same way that I used to, it’s not with heartache and anger and sadness anymore. I miss you with love and happiness. I will forever hate what Foyet took from you, will blame myself forever.

During our last conversation you told me to teach Jack believe in love and I think I’m doing that. He loves Haley, fiercely, even after everything. He loves Peanut now when Emily is showing, and refuses to name the baby anything else.

Peanut is doing good, she’s a girl. I know you always wanted a girl, and somehow I just know that you’re watching over her too. We got a house, I’m not sure if that’s the right thing to do but it will be easier. Jack is happy even after yet another change, he loves his new room. The first thing he did was to put your picture up beside his bed.

I know you’re up there, I know you’re watching over our boy. And as selfish as that might be, it brings me strength.

With all our love - Aaron

#hotchniss #hotchniss fanfiction #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #aaron x emily #Criminal Minds Fanfiction #hotchniss fanfic

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smilexdrarry · 4 years

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If your parents were ✨Drarry✨

- Harry would constantly make your favorite dinner, because you would always complement the food, and that would make Harry proud of his cooking; while Draco would bug you with your love life just to have an excuse for him to go into long, detailed, stories of him and Harry, until Harry overheard him talking and throw a spoon across the kitchen at him and you two would start laughing.

- Whenever you would go out in public and see someone make a face at Harry and Draco holding hands you would start to take out your wand so you could hex them but then Harry pulled you away apologizing to the the person (who looked terrified of you) and once Draco would walk you away, Harry would turn around and jinx their legs together.

- After you got your Hogwarts letter you overheard Harry and Draco betting what house you would be in, whoever won got 20 gallons and something you could not hear them say, they were whispering in each other's ears...in the end Draco won the bet. You swore they betted on anything they could.

- Whenever you would come home for Christmas break Draco would ask you about your grades and how your academic work was while Harry would ask if you were dating anyone and how your friends were. Before you could say anything they got mad at each other for talking over one another, you smiled, glad you didn't have to answer any of the questions now (you were barley passing half of your classes)

- Draco would buy you the most loveliest clothes for Christmas while Harry got you all your favorite quidditch stuff. You hugged both of them and gave them your gift, which was a scrapbook of your life together with them. Draco sobbed while saying, "oh it's just so b-beautiful." Harry stroked his back while Draco cried in his shoulder and Harry kissed the top of your head, whispering thank you.

- Whenever you were sad you would have long talks with Harry, you would hug him and tell him thank you before running to Draco and begging him to watch your favorite movie with him, (when you wanted to watch 'your favorite movie' with Draco he always knew you were upset) he agreed, getting popcorn and cuddling with you on the couch, while you cried and he stroked your hair; Harry watched the two of you in the doorway smiling too himself.

- Once when you were little, like 5, Harry and Draco took you out with that for thanksgiving shopping (they were hosting the feast that year) and one minute later you ran out of sight. And Harry and Draco freaked out like they panicked to where they had called Hermione and Ron 7 minutes after you disappeared to tell them they had lost you. Then all of a sudden you showed up with a handful of flowers in your hand to give to your parents. Harry started crying then picked you up, thanking god you were ok, while Draco was yelling at you but only because he was scared out of his wits for your safety. They vowed that day they would never take their eyes off you.

- You called Harry Dad and Draco Father

- Everyone at school was jealous of you for having the coolest parents ever (that was your biggest flex), but what they didn't know was that you thought they were the dorkiest ever...maybe the cutest though, you could never decide.

- Whenever the three of you would watch a movie together Harry and Draco would always cuddle, Draco's head on Harry's chest staring intently at the screen, the two of them made your heart warm, you wanted a love one day exactly like their's, you loved them a lot. You punched Harry's arm and smirked at him, he would just ruffle your hair and bring you closer to him, putting a arm around your shoulder.

- One time you got really sick, it was a really bad stomach bug and you couldn't stop throwing up, Draco was a little disgusted but Harry rubbed your back the whole time and held you hair back. He would shush you when you would try to say you were fine, and then he would give you extra potions. Draco got the ice cream and patted you on the head before running out of the room clamming he didn't want to get your sickness. Harry rolled his eyes and you laughed digging into your favorite ice cream.

- the first time you tasted fire whiskey was when Harry offered just a sip and you tried it but then had half the bottle, Harry just stared. Then Draco came running over yelling at Harry that he shouldn't give you alcohol yet but then Harry said, "well I bet you were definitely drinking pumpkin juice at all the parties you went to when we were back at school." You snorted and Draco's jaw dropped by being caught off guard and Harry winked at you.

- Harry is the layed back parent while Draco is more strict, but Draco normally lets you get away with anything only if you hug him and kiss him on the cheek. Then he tries to tickle you and you always thrash your arms yelling and laughing at the same time, claiming you were too old for that but Draco always respond with "your always be little to me." You would smile at him and he would smile back, then you ran away, laughing that you got free.

- Draco always likes to bring up the time when Harry almost named you after all the people that had died that were close to him. Harry would scowl at Draco while Draco held back his laughter, while you'd roll around on the floor holding your stomach after hearing the list of miss matched names he came up with. "It was like he put all the names in a hat then pulled some out and put them in a random order." Draco smiled proudly at himself for making you laugh. "Well I'm just glad father picked my name then!" You laughed. "I had to yell at him for like a week before he finally gave in." Draco said. Harry then stomped off to his and Draco's bedroom like a 5 year old.

- You would always stay at aunt Hermione's and uncle Ron's place when Harry and Draco would have to go on a serious Auror mission, you were always so scared that they were going to get hurt, a couple of years ago they had went on one and Draco got badly hurt and had to stay at St Mungo's Hospital for at least a month. You could never forget the look on Harry's face when you arrived at that hospital. So you would pace the house at 3 in the morning till your aunt would come out and ask what the matter was. You told her you were worried and she said she was too. Later that next day Harry and Draco walked into the house perfectly fine, you flew into there arms.

- Whenever you arrived back at school, McGonagall always asked you how Harry and Draco were, you were happy to oblige. She always seemed to be so interested in them and know everything, you couldn’t help but wonder that she knew they were dating back in school in secret. You had asked her once and she claimed that “I have no idea what your talking about, I did not know that your parents were having a secret relationship.” You respond: “not even a little?” She had sighed, “I was just as surprised as everyone else when we found out they were together.” You nodded and right before you walked out of the classroom you saw a smile play on her lips. You smirked and headed to your next class.

- The day Harry got promoted to head auror was so fun. It happened at a banquet, all family members of all the aurors got to go, you sat at a table with of course your parents, your aunt and uncle, (Ron was an auror too) and your cousins Hugo and Rose. They called Harry's name to receive his promotion and everyone stood up and clapped, Draco kissed him full on the lips, (the clapping got louder) you laughed and gave Harry a nudge to go get his reward. After he came back to the table he hugged you and then kissed Draco again before sitting. You guys left soon after that and Harry said he wanted to do something to celebrate. "I could think of something." Draco had said with a smirk. You faked gagged and told him to shut up. They laughed while you covered your ears. You guys ended up ordering pizza and and watching a movie.

That’s it for now! I might do a part two if you guys like this though, let me know what you think! I think it’s wonderful tbh 😒 my serotonin level while making this 📈📈📈

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kiegosbby · 4 years

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all good stories have bad endings.

I’m going to make this a two part story, one with a good ending and one with a bad one, so if you want a happy ending, go here.

warnings:breakup, crying, drinking, cutting, implying suicide.

✁- - - - - - r- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

you were silently cooking dinner at your and your boyfriends apartment, he had been on a long mission and today was the day he was coming back. You were beyond excited, after not seeing the love of your life for months, you were absolutely bursting from how excited you were.

you were making his favorite dish, which was obviously any sort of chicken. your back was tired, from getting everything ready for him. the papers saying the fight was over and the hero’s had won, you were relieved of course, hawks couldn’t have any contact with you when he was on the mission so that’s how you found out.

he would be home soon so you started plating the dishes, and set them on the table. you sat and scrolled mindlessly on your phone, before you heard the doorknob jiggle. he was finally home, after all these months after the tears, the Lonley nights you stayed awake hoping he was ok, he was finally home.

you jumped up from your seat and went to meet him at the door.

he opened the door, dragging a suitcase in and he had a tired look on his face. he looked up at you and you quickly saw his facade change from tired to sadness, quickly back to tiredness, this time adding a little annoyance in it. He let out a annoyed huff

you went to give him a hug, a little confused from what had just happened, and even more confused when he pulled away from your hug.

“Is everything ok keigo?” you were a little hurt youd admit it. after all these months and all you got was a huff? anger started to stir in you as you waited for his response.

“why are you still here? Didn’t you get the hint when I didn’t reply to you at all?” he crossed his arms in front of him, giving you the most annoyed look he could muster.

you looked at him with confusion, rage, and disbelief. how could he say all this? after everything you’ve done for him. how much you helped him. you couldn’t believe this

“keigo this isn’t funny. I’ve waited for you for months and did so much for you! you can’t be serious?” your voice betrayed you and squeaked slightly at the end.

“do I sound like I’m trying to be funny y/n? I’m sorry that you thought I wanted you to wait but I’ve ignored you for months y/n. Get the hint and get out.” he looked bored? you were far past angry now. how dare he do this to you? how could he? he was your everything. everything you’d ever want from anyone. without him you were nothing. no one.

“I’m sorry I misread the situation.” your voice was a whisper, and you held back tears as you quickly ran to your shared room, packing everything you could see. Tears fell, and you quickly made your way to the exit of the apartment. you turned around before leaving, spotting hawks at the balcony, looking into the sunset.

you walked up to him and looked down at your feet.

“I hope your making the right choice hawks. I was the only one that was ever there for you. and now you’ve lost that to.”

you turned to walk away, before turning your head over your shoulder quickly.

“burn in hell”

you thought you heard a sniffle, but stormed away before thinking twice.

you walked down the empty streets, sobs running your body. the wind hit your skin as you walked, it felt good, at least you weren’t numb. you walked for what felt like hours, thoughts rushing through your mind and when you finally stopped for a second to see where your legs had taken you, you saw a small store and you were at the edge of town.

you walked in with puffy eyes looking around. Eyes landing on the alcohol isle, and walking towards it. you strolled down the isle and picked a bottle of whisky out. keigo always loved whiskey so you grew accustomed to it. you quickly checked out and started wandering around town again, downing the whisky in chugs.

you ended sitting on a worker catwalk on a bridge, having a view over the city. you looked through your bag for a jacket. even though you loved the coldness, you wanted to be warm. Warm again.

as you were looking through the bag, a knife fell out. you almost laughed as you picked it up. it was the knife hawks made you carry around when you went out alone. he wanted you to be safe. you set it down and continued looking through your bag.

you took your jacket out and as you pulled it on, one of hawks feathers fell out. you picked up in awe, and brushed your fingers along the soft feather. sobs started to overtake your body again. as much as you missed him, and how much you hated him at this moment, you wanted him badly. to hold you and tell you everything would be ok.

you put the feather down in your lap and grabbed the knife from your side, opening it slowly. you ran your finger up the blade, making your finger drip with blood, it was sharp, and you had a quick thought.

maybe your mind was clouded from the whisky, but you pulled your sleeves up, giving the wind access to your skin.

you grabbed the feather and put it up to your face, giving it a kiss.

“I’m sorry kiego. I didn’t mean what I said when I left. I know you don’t care but I wanted to say g-goodbye before I did anything. I’m sorry if I did anything to make you want me to leave, but you were my happiness keigo... you were everything I ever needed and everything I ever wanted. and now that your gone, I have nothing to live for. I’m sorry, I hope you live a happy life..”

you put the feather down and grabbed the knife again. funny how good things can turn badly so quickly.

this morning you were bursting with excitement and now here you were, sitting on top of a bridge, with a knife in your hand. how stupid could you be? you and him would never last.

you brang the knife to your arm and slowly dragged it down your arm. your blood seeped from your skin as you slowly killed yourself.

blood dropped into the feather and you quickly did the other arm. with all the power you had left you brang the knife to your throat.

“I’m sorry”

you quickly made a slit in your throat and saw the blackness incass your vision. you fell backwards and took in the last sight before you before you were gone.

#bnha angst #bnha fanfiction #bnha hawks #hawks x reader #hawks x y/n #katsuki bakugo x reader #mha hawks #pro hero hawks #bnha imagines #hawks #hawks angst #sad boi hours #bnha x reader

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deascheck · 3 years

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Family is More than Blood

Summary: The reader and Winchester brothers bond as the brothers try to help the reader realize family is more than blood when a hunt goes wrong.

Pairings: none

Word Count: 4439

Warnings: angst, description of physical pain, death and fluff <33 !!!

A/N: Also, this is my absolute first SPN fic I ever wrote and am now getting around to posting it. I’ve fleshed it out and edited it since then, but still. Not bad for a first attempt at writing SPN, I think! Thank you to the wonderful @winchest09 for beta'ing once again!!

Well.. At least my day could not possibly get any worse, you thought. After getting a rip from your parents for choosing to stay with the Winchesters, all you felt like doing was curling up in bed with a bottle of whiskey and drinking away your newest painful memory. Correction, you didn’t get a rip. You had just been disowned. You frowned as you thought about your parents. I don’t need Mom or Dad… They don’t understand the life I want to live. How long has it been since they supported me? You rolled your eyes as they filled up with tears.

You’d been with the Winchester brothers for four months now, grabbing any case you could get your hands on. You weren’t sure how they viewed you, given the short time you’d been together, but you were confident in how you viewed them; badasses.

They had first run into you on a case, interrupting your attempt to fight a vengeful spirit on your own. To this day you argued that you would have won the fight. Whenever you said it though, Dean just scoffed and Sam would muss your hair with a small smile.

As you thought about the adventures you’d had with the brothers, trying hard to keep your mind off your parents, you heard a knock on your door.

Quickly, you wiped your eyes to make sure they were dry, and then answered in a strong voice, “Come in!” You bet yourself it would be Sam, since Dean tended to just barge in. Sure enough, Sam poked his head in. “Y/N? Hey, we’re about to sit and eat dinner. You coming?”

Sighing, you nodded and got up. As much as you loved the Winchesters, you didn’t feel like bringing them into your family drama quite yet. It seemed best to keep up appearances. Wandering into the kitchen, the smell of hamburgers hit your nose. You smiled, remembering that Dean had made it a rule: Hamburgers every Friday night if and when the three of you were at the bunker.

Dean grinned at you as you sat down, happy with having a night off. You gave him your best smile back, hoping he didn’t notice you were off rhythm tonight.

“Hey Y/N! Haven’t seen you all afternoon. You been hiding?” Dean looked at you inquisitively as he took a massive bite of his burger, rolling his eyes in ecstasy.

You gave a small chuckle. “I think I’m allowed to hide from you two terrors every once in a while with what I put up with from you.”

As Dean’s chest swelled with indignity, you winked quickly at Sam. When Dean was happy, it was easy to tease him.

Sam gave you a quick smile back, though he seemed a little distracted.

Crap. He can tell. He’s studying me! Do better, Y/N. Get the banter going! Your inner panic began. Sam had always been able to pick up on how you were feeling, no matter how well you hid it. Even from day one, he had read you like a book.

You spent the rest of dinner working on making the two of them laugh, embracing the warmth their laughter brought you. You knew you’d have to hold on tight to this happy feeling once you were on your own for the night. The nighttime was always when any unhappiness you were harboring hit you the hardest.

As you stood up and started clearing the table, you missed a non-verbal exchange between the brothers.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah, Dean?”

“We’re gonna to head to the bar in town.”

You didn’t pause in your cleaning as you rolled your eyes. “Good for you.”

“No, we’re ALL going, ya moron. Stop cleaning and get ready! We leave in 10!”

Turning around from the sink, you narrowed your eyes as you studied him. “Why? I’ve got dinner to clean up and a good book waiting in my room.”

This time, it was Sam who answered with a big grin. “Why? Cause it’s high time you learn how to compete with us at pool. And you’re gonna need more alcohol than we have to deal with Dean’s cockiness.” He laughed at Dean as he walked around the table to grab your shoulders and guide you out the kitchen door.

“Sammmmm,” you complain. “I don’t want to have to do the dishes later! You’ve seen the mess Dean makes when he cooks!”

Sam bent down to put his mouth close to your ear. “I have seen the messes he makes. But I’ve also seen you hide when you’re hurting. So we’re going out to give you some fun memories to battle your bad ones with.”

Your eyes filled with tears at his thoughtfulness. You stopped resisting him and turned around to give him a giant hug. Being significantly shorter than him, if you wanted a comfort hug, you had to jump and wrap your arms around his neck. Sam caught you and wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you tight as your feet dangled off the ground several inches. You buried your face into the crook of his neck, squeezing your arms gently to let him know that you appreciated what he was doing. Sam’s arms squeezed back.

After a couple minutes like that, he lifted his cheek from your head and started to walk, straddling a bit to avoid hitting your legs as he walked. You laughed and started to struggle. “You big teddy bear – put me down! I can walk!”

As Sam laughed too, you could feel it rumble deep in his chest. He said, “So? I need my workout for the day! I’ll carry you to your room, m’lady.”

Appeased, you stopped struggling until what he said hit you. Indignant, you exclaimed, “Workout? I’m a workout to you? I am NOT that heavy!” Sam laughed at your outrage and then grunted as your struggling resumed.

“Ok! Ok! I’ll put you down. But only if you promise to be ready in a couple minutes!” Sam looked at you, more solemn now. “We’re serious about giving you some good memories, Y/N. You are a part of our family, and we want you to be as happy as you can be in the life we live.”

As Sam put you down, you gave him a quick peck on his cheek as a thank you, and ran into your room. It wasn’t hard to decide what to wear since you had all of two non flannel/jean outfits. Grabbing your white, high-waisted short shorts, you pulled them on as you ran into your bathroom, rummaging through the mess of clothing, make-up, and toiletries on your counter. Your fingers found your eyeliner, mascara, and lip gloss, and you immediately separated them by placing them on a tshirt as you pulled your crop top on. It was one of your favorite tops, and you loved to wear it when you got the chance. But you’d been so busy with the Winchesters, you hadn’t gotten to dress up since before you became a hunter.

Despite the lack of practice, you dolled up quite nicely within 10 minutes. You fluffed your hair as you walked to your door, hoping that you looked ok. Opening your door, you yelled for Sam and Dean, “Guys! I’m ready, let’s go!”

You walked down the hall towards the garage, suddenly impatient. You opened the garage door and saw that the boys weren’t there yet. You gasped. I actually beat them? How on earth did I beat two men in getting ready for a night out? Smiling smugly, you leaned against Baby, crossing your ankles and your arms as you waited. This was a day for the history books.

Sam and Dean walked through the door in button down shirts and jeans. You huffed softly, wishing they’d change it up occasionally. Talking quietly, they didn’t see you until they got close to the car. Glancing forward, Dean spotted you first and stopped dead in his tracks, his jaw hanging slightly. Sam, in the middle of a sentence, stopped when he saw Dean fall back. Confused, he looked around and saw you leaning against the car. His eyebrows go up slightly and his eyes roamed down and up your body slowly. Feeling slightly uncomfortable, yet flattered, you flipped your hair as you opened the rear passenger door.

Sending a quick look in their direction, you teased, “If you boys don’t hurry up, the bar is going to be closed by the time we even get out of this garage.”

They quickly shook out of their stupor and climbed in the car. Clearly they had not seen you dressed up enough. Dean started Baby up and the three of you headed out.

The drive to the bar was not very long, and before you knew it, Dean was pulling into a parking spot. You got out, and headed inside with the brothers. As you walked in, you noticed they each flanked you. You realized they were feeling protective, and you couldn’t help but loop your arms through theirs in a burst of rare affection for the two of them. Looking up, you caught them exchanging happy smiles over your head. This was going to be a fun night, you thought to yourself.

The three of you reached the bar, and while you and Sam sat down, Dean ordered three whiskeys. One thing that you knew the boys liked about you was that you could drink like they did. The bartender brought you your drinks, and you all took a big gulp from your glasses, wincing slightly at the burn that trailed down your throats.

“Ok, Y/N.” Dean looked at you seriously as he put his glass down. “This is the plan. We’re going to get drunk, and then I’m going to teach you how to play pool with the big boys. Because you, my dear, are sadly lacking in your pool skills.” He smiled a big smile, letting you know he was teasing.

You leaned in, and said right in his face, “Challenge accepted, Winchester. Bring it on!” You laughed at the surprised look on his face and turned to Sam. Raising your glass, you gave him a nod and a wink and downed the rest of your drink.

As the three of you ordered another round, you noticed something caught in the napkin dispenser. You moved closer to inspect it, and as you did, your face paled. It was a hex bag. Pulling a napkin out of the dispenser, you used it to grab the bag and bring it to you. You turned around and sat down again, wishing to God you hadn’t seen anything. All you wanted was to get wasted and make some good memories with Sam and Dean to counter the awful ones of your parents. But you were never one to back down from a hunt. And maybe you’d get to release some pent up emotions by beating up this damn witch.

Sam noticed the napkin in your hand and asked, “Hey Y/N, what’s in the napkin?”

You groaned and pulled it below the counter before you opened it up. Their eyes widened as they saw you reveal a hex bag. Sighing, you said, “Boys, we have a witch in our territory. We’ve got work to do.”

Dean hung his head and sighed. “Why tonight?” he asked, frustrated. “This stupid witch couldn’t have waited for us to get ONE NIGHT off?” He grabbed his second drink and downed it in three gulps. He growled, “Let’s go finish this mother fucker.”

You slid off your seat and headed to the door when your head started spinning. Unable to stay upright, you crashed into Sam, who caught you. “Y/N? Y/N what’s going on? What’s wrong?” His concerned eyes swam above you as you tried to focus on what he was saying.

“Sam.. ‘M so dizzy.. Why…” You left it at that, feeling more than dizzy. Your stomach turned, and you turned your head just in time as you vomited violently all over the floor. You felt fear threaten to overwhelm you as you saw blood on the floor.

Dean grabbed your head when you finished and shook you gently to get your attention. “Y/N! You gotta talk to us! What’s wrong?” His deep voice was slightly husky with his urgency.

You met his eyes and moaned, “So dizzy.. and my stomach!” You clutched your stomach as pain shot through it, draining you.

Sam’s arms tightened around you as you went limp, the strength quickly leaving your body. He hoisted you up bridal style and said to Dean, “Dude, what happened to the hex bag?”

Dean’s eyes widened in understanding, and he quickly checked your pockets. As he patted through them, he apologetically said, “Sorry Y/N, I promise you I’m not trying to feel you up.” Dean found it and tucked the hex bag into his shirt’s front pocket, handling it with a bandana, before heading for the car. Sam was hot on his heels with you in his arms.

When they reached Baby, Dean helped Sam get you into the back seat before they opened up the hex bag. They mumbled in confusion as they realized it must have been made for you. Its location originally seemed a coincidence. But the fact that once you held the hex bag and then got sick solidified their theory. The witch knew you and wanted you to suffer.

Dean worked on destroying the bag while Sam patted a wet rag along your face, trying to help the best he can. Your eyelids fluttered weakly as you turned your head to look at him. The bag may have been gone, but you were still weak from whatever the bag inflicted on you. As you felt the rag on your face, your feverish thought process picked up. This isn’t over… If I’m sick, Sam and Dean are distracted. It would have been too easy to just destroy the hex bag. Trap... Y/N, get your act together and warn them! You forced your eyes fully open and looked at Sam. He met your eyes in surprise, seeing a fear and determination in yours. You forced yourself to put full sentences together, and say, “Sam. This is too easy. It’s a trap- you two need to arm up. I think the witch is here.” As you finished, you heard two thumps. Sam leaned back and looked towards the sound.

“Dean! Y/N, Dean’s down!” As the reality of your situation fully set in, your adrenaline started to kick in.

Good to know that I can practically be on my deathbed and my adrenaline will bring me back, you thought wryly. You stayed low and slid out of the car, carefully watching the surrounding lot. Sam grabbed Dean and pulled him over to you. He had a lump on his head, but his pulse was steady. What the hell? How did he get knocked out? Friggin witch must be here…

Sam motioned for you to lie down and roll under the car. You rolled under the car and waited a few seconds, knowing the witch must be close. As you got ready to emerge from the other side, you heard an angry, rough, female voice utter three words in latin, and then you heard another two thuds.

Shit. She must have gotten Sam. What the hell does she want? Is she one of those psychos that plays with her victims before she kills them? Your stomach turned uncomfortably as your imagination ran away with you, disgusting images flashing before your eyes. Yo. Dude. Gotta focus, you told yourself. Sam and Dean need me.. With that thought you rolled out and sprang to your feet, ready to fight.

For the first time in your short hunting career, you were grateful that you had faced so many witches. Being a quick learner, you knew a spell or two yourself. As you located the witch, you yelled, “Obmutesce!”

Roughly, you knew you were removing her ability to speak. You saw her work her mouth in surprise and frustration, and you grinned. The spell worked. Grabbing a knife and a gun from your bag in the back seat, you faced her. As she tried to get around the spell, you took a second to study her. She had dark brown hair, dark eyes, and a long, albeit pretty face. She was a little taller than you, and clearly had some class. Her wardrobe just screamed ‘snobby rich girl’.

As the two of you locked eyes, hers went black. Immediately your mind went into panic mode. She’s a demon witch? A witch demon? I’m screwed! Sam and Dean need to wake up! Shit!

Your face remained hard and confident as you called out, “Ya know, you may be the spawn of hell, but without the ability to speak, there’s really jack shit you can do to me without having to fight me.” You forced yourself to give a big predatory grin that you learned from Dean. “And well, I’ve got two weapons here that will kill you.” You hold up the gun and the knife tauntingly. Thankfully, you’d stolen the demon killing knife from Dean after the last hunt, and had stuck it in your bag- intending to be the one to kill the next demon the three of you faced.

The witch raised a hand, looking smug, and flicked her wrist. Your weapons yanked out of your hands and went flying. Your jaw went slack. Ok, she’s a demon who isn’t afraid to use her demon powers. Bluffing, failed. Plan B. Attack? You grimaced as you realized you’d have to charge her. This is one fight I’m probably going to be feeling for a week... You groaned mentally and went to attack her.

If it was a fight she wanted, it was a fight she’d get. Thanks to your parents, you’d always been able to defend yourself. You knew aikido, karate, and boxing. You’d beaten both Sam and Dean in several training fights.

The minute you got close, she snapped her fingers and you found yourself flying through the air, crashing onto a car’s windshield a few yards away. Ahhh...That one hurt. Freaking bitch. Who does she think she is? You growled at her, “What? Afraid you can’t take me in a fair fight? Is that why you’re hiding behind your stupid demon powers?” You approached her again, taking your eyes off her for a split second to check on Sam and Dean. They were both still and unmoving.

That made you even angrier, and you attacked again. This time the witch let you get even closer before she waved her hand and sent you flying again. You contacted a car’s driver door, the impact jarring every bone in your body. You prayed to yourself, Come on Sam, come on Dean... I don’t know how to exorcise her! Wake up! I’m only going to be able to take this for so long... Even just two hits in and you could feel your body giving. You were sure you have a couple cracked ribs, and maybe a mild concussion. Cars were hard, unforgiving objects.

As you walked towards the witch again, warily, you noticed Dean stirring. Perfect. Time to help wake him up. Throwing caution to the wind, you charged her at top speed and full volume, knowing you wouldn’t get even close at that rate. Sure enough, she grinned maniacally as you got closer, before sending you off through the air once again. This time, you get knocked against a light post.

As you hit the post, and then the ground, you felt a searing pain in your knee and your shoulder. Eyes welling, you looked down and saw your kneecap was not at the front of your knee. Despite the rising urgency of the situation, you couldn’t help but think how gross it was. You couldn’t look at the disfigured limb without feeling weak and began to taste bile in your throat. Your shoulder was just about in the same situation. You could feel it out of its socket.

Looking up, you saw the witch making her way to you. As you watched her approach, you wished you could talk to her and find out why she had such an interest in you. Despite your pain-addled brain going haywire, you managed to organize your thoughts enough to try to identify your attacker. Do I know her? We haven’t faced her before.. or she’d be dead. Is it the demon that knows me? Which demon is it?

You started getting desperate, realizing you were completely helpless against a freaking demon. She stopped in front of you and crouched down to your level, staring at you closely. Your voice filled with pain, you ask, “Who are you? What do you want with us?”

As you asked, you heard the sound of flesh being torn, and you saw the demon-killing knife protrude from her chest. You looked up in shock, and you saw Dean pulling his knife from the witch’s body. His hard battle face changed into one of deep concern as he looked at you.

“Y/N! Man, you are messed up... What hurts?”

You responded softly, trying hard not to cry. “My shoulder and knee... I think they’re dislocated. My ribs feel cracked, and my head hurts like nobody’s business.” You looked at him helplessly.

Dean’s face battled between sympathy for you and anger at the witch. His sympathy won, and he said, “Here, let’s get you up.” He wrapped his arm around your waist and helped haul you to your feet, mindful of your dislocated knee and shoulder.

Now that Dean was awake and here, and the witch/demon/enemy was dead, you started going into shock. You began to tremble, and Dean saw you starting to deteriorate. He quickly said, “Oh no you don’t,” and slapped your face gently. “We still have some work to do, sweetheart. Don’t worry, Sammy and I will take care of you.”

Startled into calm, you look at him. The words started tumbling out of your mouth, “Dean, it was a witch possessed by a demon. I didn’t know who she was, and I muted her, so I couldn’t find out after that. She never let me get close. She just kept tossing me around like she was freaking Goliath, and oh my God, Dean, I hurt so bad...” At this point you couldn’t handle it, and the tears started to cascade down your cheeks, leaving you breathless as you lost control.

Dean brought you as close to his chest as he could without hurting you, and shushed you softly. “Shhh, Y/N it’s ok.. Shh. You did great, kid. You did great. The bitch is dead now- there’s nothing to worry about. Hey, you’re ok. Shh...”

He held you for several minutes, allowing you to cry your stress, fear, pain, and anger out. As you finished, despite the massive amount of pain you were in, you relished the moment of getting to snuggle with Dean; it happened so rarely that you’d take it, regardless of the circumstance.

Once you had quieted down, Dean helped you over to where Sam was, who was slowly waking up. He sat up slowly and put his hand to his head, groaning softly. As he looked around, he saw you and Dean. Immediately he was on his feet and hovering anxiously when you told him not to touch your right side. Dean helped you perch on the side of Baby’s backseat while you discussed how best to get you home.

Sam looked at you guiltily and said, “Y/N, I can put your shoulder and knee back into place, but it’s gonna hurt a lot. And you’ll probably be in even more pain once they’re back. Do you want to do this now?”

You looked at him wearily, with your tear-stained face. “Sam, I’m in more pain than I’ve been in my life, quite honestly. So since my pain record has been set tonight, it doesn’t matter to me how high it gets as long as I can get fixed quickly.”

Dean stepped in at this point, and explained, “Y/N, he’s just asking because we can take you to a hospital and have them do it while you’re on pain meds. You’ll be a lot more comfortable, but they might not let you go home tonight. If we do it, it’ll be a helluva lot more uncomfortable, but you’ll be home, and we can take care of you there.”

You attempted a smile. “It’s a no-brainer, boys... Help me out. And take me home? Please?”

Needless to say, your level of pain went from overwhelming to excruciating when they reset your knee and shoulder. But you were grateful the boys could get you right again. Dean was driving and Sam was helping prop you up in a comfortable position in the back seat.

You reflected as you were lulled into a half-asleep state. Ha... And here I was thinking today couldn’t get any worse. My parents disowned me, I don’t get to get drunk because I got attacked by a demon-witch, and then I’m almost killed because I can’t protect myself, Sam, or Dean. What a fantastic fucking day.

Sam’s voice brought you to a more conscious state. “Y/N? Hey, sweetheart. Sorry, I know you’re falling asleep. I just wanted to tell you I know you’re probably beating yourself up, and you’re probably thinking about how much today sucked. Which,” he paused to smile briefly, “would be fair. However, I want you to know that you were incredibly brave today. Not many new hunters would be willing to face such an intimidating challenge alone.” He bent his head around sideways to look at you and see what you were thinking about. “Seriously, Y/N. Dean and I are proud to call you our sister and fellow hunter. Family is more than just blood.”

You smiled up at him as you felt sleep starting to take over you. “Sam, there’s no one I would rather have as my brothers. Thank you for taking me in. I love you guys.”

You continue thinking as you fight sleep. The bunker, living with my boys, that’s my home. They’re my family. Sam and Dean are the only two who matter in my life. I choose my family...

Sam smoothed your hair gently as you nodded off. “It’s us who are grateful, Y/N. You are the sister we never had.”

#supernatural writing #supernatural fan fic #supernatural fandom #supernatural fanfiction #sam winchester #sam winchester fanfiction #dean winchester #dean winchester fanfiction #deascheck

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dothwrites · 5 years

Text

15.11 coda--calm before the storm

Happiness is fleeting. Happiness is just the calm before the storm. And the happier you are, the more you have to lose when it hits.--Ranae Glass

---

Happiness is a razor’s edge.

Castiel feels it bubbling underneath his skin and chasing itself like lightning storms across his grace. It’s persistent and sly, skirting just around the edges of his perception before darting coyly away, the prettiest girl at the dance wanting his attention.

When you finally let the sun shine on your face, The Empty had said, its mouth stretched wide in a death’s head grin. When you finally let yourself be happy. That’s when I’ll take you.

And Castiel had agreed because when was he ever happy? He’s nursed grief like a favored babe, held it close to his chest, nestled it in the folds of his coat, carried it until his hands were bleeding. Happiness was a myth, something meant for others.

Not for broken failures.

But now, he can taste happiness at the back of his throat and feel it dancing at his fingertips. It slides along the back of his neck and whispers in his ear. When he walks into a room to find Sam, Dean, and Jack inside, happiness bursts like galaxies in the pit of his belly.

They’re still fragile around each other, still figuring out how they fit together with their new, jagged edges. They’re no longer the sleek machine of before. Their gears stick, they jam. They’re not smooth, not whole.

Not yet.

The longer Jack stays put, the more that he talks to Sam, the better it gets. The more Dean’s eyes soften, the better it gets.

And happiness haunts his every step.

---

Castiel takes to locking himself away. In the basement, in his room, in his truck-wherever the Winchesters won’t follow him. He needs to get away. He can’t be around them--Jack laughing as he stretches a piece of cheese as far as it will go, Dean bickering with Sam over the last piece of pizza, all three of them glowing with the calm, sedate light of bliss.

And happiness brushes against Castiel’s face like cobwebs.

Dean smiles at him now--little, hesitant things that disappear almost the second that they appear, but Castiel sees them. He sees them all.

Dean trusts him. Again. Finally. He asks for Castiel’s opinion and takes his advice. When Jack says that Castiel told him something was all right, Dean accepts it. The gift of Dean’s trust unfolds in his hands like the tenderest bloom and it shreds Castiel to lay it aside. But he does and when the pain rips through him, he clings to it.

Dean’s hand twitches towards him. They never make contact, but the intent is there. And that intent, those smiles...They’ll kill him as sure as anything else in this world.

So he runs. He makes himself a ghost around the bunker, but the structure isn’t large enough to contain the Winchester’s joy. It bursts from the seams, leaks through the pipes and vents, slithers down his spine until he can feel it inside him.

And it would be so easy to give in. He wants to. Every part of him yearns for the easy acceptance of Sam’s hand on his shoulder, Jack’s knee pressing into his, Dean’s smile heavy on him. It would be so easy to walk upstairs and partake in the comfort that they’re offering him.

And it would kill him.

---

Despite what he says, Dean is not a stupid man. He notices Castiel’s absence and after two days, he comes to find Castiel.

He’s sneaky about it. He waits until Castiel is elbows deep in reorganizing the stacks in the basement, when all of his considerable concentration is focused on deciphering ancient Sumerian badly written in a shaky hand. He doesn’t even notice Dean until he speaks.

“So this is where you’ve been hiding lately.”

Castiel doesn’t jump, and for that he’s proud. He doesn’t turn around as he answers, “The files down here were disorganized. If we’re really looking for a way to defeat God, then we need to have all the information we can at our disposal. Wouldn’t it be awful if the key to everything was misfiled in one of these boxes?”

Dean makes a skeptical noise in the back of his throat. “Yeah. Well, I don’t think that you’re finding the answer any time tonight. What is it that you’re even looking at?”

“It’s um...It looks like the writer was attempting a spell to deodorize his shoes.” Castiel glances over the characters and sighs. “Which wouldn’t have worked because he had a faulty translation.”

This time Dean doesn’t bother to hide his skepticism. “Well. With that fascinating piece of work, I think we can say that your job is done here, right? Come upstairs. Play some Mario Kart. Just...” Something soft and desperate flashes in Dean’s eyes. It’s there and gone before Castiel can really appreciate it, and that’s good; he shouldn’t appreciate it. “The kid’s asking about you. Be nice if you were up there with us.”

If the words were spoken a few months ago, even a few weeks ago, there would have been venom dripping off of them. But now, Dean just sounds a little sad, a little wistful.

“We won Cas.” Dean’s fingers worry at a thread on the cuff of his sleeve. “It’s weird, don’t get me wrong, but...Anytime that we get someone back, it’s a win.”

He smiles and it’s like watching galaxies being born. Happiness curls around Castiel’s chest and works its way up his throat. When you finally let the sun shine on your face...

“Come upstairs. Please.” Dean gives him one last, searching look, and turns to walk down the hallway. The sound of him retreating up the stairs echoes through the room.

Castiel gives one last look to the boxes spread around the room.

After a long moment, he follows Dean.

---

“You should tell him,” Jack says, late one night when Sam and Dean are asleep.

“He doesn’t need to know,” Castiel says, the denial coming more as an automatic reflex than as a conscious thought.

“Dean doesn’t like being lied to,” Jack says, with the intensity of a schoolboy reciting lessons learned. “And omitting a fact is almost as bad as lying about it.”

When did Jack become smarter than him? When did his boy grow up? Was it between life and death? Or has Jack always been wiser than him?

“You should tell him,” Jack says again. “He misses you.”

---

“Is everything all right?” Sam asks him, a day later. “It’s just...You’ve been...” He waves his hand in what might be considered a reassuring gesture. “Ever since we got Jack back.”

“I’m fine,” Castiel answers. From the look on Sam’s face, Castiel can tell that he’s not convinced. “It’s just a lot,” he tries. “Jack, and Chuck, and Purgatory...”

He lets his voice trail off, because it’s the truth, but it’s not all the truth, and for a second, he lets himself wonder what it would be like if he were to come clean. If he were to look at Sam’s face and say, Sam I’m in trouble because I made a deal. I made a deal and I didn’t think that I would ever have to pay up because the price was my happiness and I didn’t think that such a thing existed. I made a deal and the price was my happiness, and it was supposed to be fine but your family makes me think that I could be happy. I look at your brother and I want to be happy.

“It’s a lot,” Castiel repeats, and there’s disappointment in Sam’s eyes, but that’s fine.

Kindness would kill him.

---

“Tell me what’s wrong,” Dean asks, late one night.

Dean should be asleep but he’s a perverse human that exists to torment Castiel.

Castiel thought that at one point, when Dean was still the Righteous Man and Castiel still had the honor of a garrison commander. He thought that Dean Winchester’s one mission in life was to thwart Castiel’s every mission.

And then he got to know Dean and discovered that yes, that was true, but there was so much more to Dean Winchester than mere disobedience.

“Cas, please. I just...we got Jack back. He’s back and he’s like he should be and...”

Dean’s faltering. Despite his prayer, despite the newfound peace within him and between them, he’s still the hurt, broken man of all those years ago. His edges still scrape against each other.

But Dean is also ever-changing, like deep waters, and even now, after all these years, he still has the ability to surprise Castiel.

“Why aren’t you happy?” Dean takes a step forward. The fall of his foot shatters the poor excuse for Castiel’s heart. “I just...I want you to be happy Cas. Please. Tell me what you need.”

And for a second, Castiel considers spilling the whole, sordid truth. Dean knows about making deals, probably better than almost anyone else. Dean knows about the sick desperation crowding the back of your throat, when a loved one hangs by a mere thread and only your paltry self can save them.

Dean doesn’t like being lied to, Jack said, and Castiel knows that as well.

Dean’s eyes are soft and earnest, pleading in the dim lamplight.

And Castiel has always been selfish.

“I’m fine Dean,” he answers, and watches Dean’s eyes shutter before he turns and walks away.

---

And still--

The sound of Jack’s laugh twists around his heart. Sam’s smile comes easier these days, especially when he mentions that Eileen might come back, Just for a weekend, he says, but the corners of his eyes crease with the force of his smile. And Dean...Dean is softer around them, gentler. He listens to Jack. He runs his thumb over Mary’s initials on the table. He washes the Impala and cooks elaborate dinners for them and makes popcorn on the stove.

And he doesn’t mention anything to Cas, but the question hangs between them. Castiel clings to it, the tiny, shredding pain, because without it he knows-he’d be lost.

And he has so, so much to live for.

---

He wants to be happy.

He looks at Dean’s hands and he wonders what they feel like. He watches Jack spar with Sam and he longs to be involved.

This was his family, once.

He’s the only thing standing in the way of it being that way once again.

Castiel wants, with a fierceness that only rivals his fear.

---

“Please Cas,” Dean says one night, after he’s had one too many fingers of whiskey, because old habits die hard. “Please. Tell me what you need.”

And because he knows that Dean won’t remember any of this in the morning, Castiel gives in. He leans in close enough to smell Dean’s skin, the scent of leather and oil clinging to him.

“I did something stupid,” he whispers, and there’s a brief flare of joy in the admitting of it. “But there was no other option and Jack was in danger...I promised the Empty that it could have me, in exchange for letting Jack go, and it said yes. But not until I was happy. And I thought...I thought that would never happen, but...”

An iron fist wraps around his chest and even though Castiel doesn’t need to breathe, he still gasps with the pain. “I want to be happy,” he says, the secret dredged up from the deepest part of him. “I look at you and I want...I want so badly, but I can’t because I want to be here more. I’m sorry Dean. I’m so sorry.”

Castiel drops his head onto Dean’s shoulder and takes comfort in the solid warmth of him. He might be mortal, might have been torn apart and patched back together too many times to count, but Dean Winchester can bear the weight of eternity, if only for a few moments.

“I want, so badly, but I’m afraid,” Castiel whispers. Fuzz from Dean’s shirt coats his lips as he moves his mouth against the soft fabric. “I’m so sorry Dean, I’m sorry.”

Dean looks at him for one second, his eyes sharpening in understanding, just before Castiel puts a gentle finger to his temple. One swift brush of grace, and Dean’s eyes fall shut.

---

“I remember what you said.”

Castiel’s head snaps up. Once again, Dean’s managed to catch him in a moment of weakness; not that he has anything else in Dean’s presence.

“You can’t be happy. Because if you’re happy, then the Empty comes and takes you.”

Dean takes a resolute step forward. This time he doesn’t stop until he’s standing directly in front of Castiel. He’s close enough to touch and Castiel’s fingers yearn for contact. Happiness nips at his ankles, scratches its nails over his jaw.

“You made a deal.”

Dean’s hands reach out towards him and unlike before, they don’t stop when they’re hovering mere millimeters away from his flesh. Dean’s hand is warm when it cups his face. Castiel can feel callouses formed from years of fighting rubbing against his cheek. He swears that he can almost feel the pulse of Dean’s blood echoed through his body.

He waits for the rage. For Dean to bluster and snap, for the thin thread holding Dean’s anger at bay to finally unravel. But Dean never snarls, his eyes never darken with fury. Instead, Dean just looks very, very sad.

“It was for Jack,” Castiel finally says, because he doesn’t regret it, he can’t. Jack is a miracle and worth at least ten of him. If there was anything that Castiel could do, anything in the universe to keep his boy safe--

“I get it.” Dean’s eyes turn misty and Castiel knows what he’s thinking of--Sam Winchester’s body cooling on a rusty mattress frame, the gravel cutting his fingers as he dug at a crossroads, the sour taste of sulfur in his mouth from a kiss. “I know why. I just...Why would you think that you couldn’t tell me?”

But then Dean stops, because he understands that as well.

Dean’s fingernails bite into his flesh, a dull pain that races through his veins. “Cas.” He makes the nickname sound an invocation. “I know why, but you know...there’s nothing in this world that we ain’t beat yet. There’s a lot of shit outside of it that we beat too. We’ve got Jack back and even freaking Death wants to lend us a hand.” Dean’s fingers turn Castiel’s face towards his. “Please.”

And Castiel doesn’t know what Dean is asking--Please keep trying? Please let yourself be happy? Please stop? But for once it doesn’t matter. None of it matters because Castiel might be an angel, but he’s not a stone and he can’t pretend to be. Not with Dean in front of him, eyes open and pleading and earnest.

Castiel leans forward and Dean tilts his head and then his lips are bumping into Dean’s, soft and tender, a gentle greeting of Hello. There you are.

I found you.

Stars burst into supernovas in the pit of his belly and whole worlds are created. Castiel gasps into Dean’s mouth. Dean swallows the sound, his hands gathering Castiel closer. Moisture prickles at the corners of Castiel’s eyes and he can taste the salt of Dean’s tears when he flicks his tongue across Dean’s lips.

This is happiness. Sam upstairs, Jack secure and happy with them once more. Dean’s acceptance and friendship. Dean’s arms wrapped around him, Dean’s mouth pressing into his, the warm glow of Dean’s soul covering his grace. Joy fills him, until he’s more a creature of ecstasy than grace.

Black crowds at the edges of his vision.

Castiel shuts his eyes.

---

It’s so hard to forget pain, but it’s even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace.--Chuck Palahniuk

#spn spoilers #spn season 15 #spn15 #destiel #destiel fic #destiel fanfic #dean winchester #castiel #jack kline #sam winchester #15.11 coda #15x11 coda #15.11 #coda fic #fare thee well spn #welcome to the end #dothwrites

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jensengirl83 · 4 years

Text

Sober Saturday Night

Dean x reader

Word Count-1080

Warnings- Angst, heartbreak, Dean and his self-loathing

Loosely based on the song “Sober Saturday Night” by Chris Young

Thank you @emoryhemsworth for showing me the song that sparked the inspiration!

Unbeta’d so mistakes are my own.

It was a lazy Sunday morning and Dean used to love mornings like this. Waking up with Y/n in his arms and a smile on his face. That was until two weeks ago. Y/n had gotten hurt on a hunt, nothing major, but that didn’t keep his anxiety from running wild. The thoughts wreaking havoc on his already self-depreciating mind. Sure, it was just a bruised rib, but it could have been so much worse. If he couldn’t stop her from getting hurt this time, what makes him think he could protect her from something else that could hurt or possibly kill her!

It all happened in the blink of an eye it seemed. His thoughts going straight to pushing her away because the alternative would hurt much worse. Dean knew it wasn’t the right thing to do, but the possibility of watching her die one day won out in his head.

“What the hell Y/n!” Dean’s voice startling her. They had barely walked through the bunker door.

“What now Dean?” Y/n knew it was going to be a fight. “I know what you’re going to say, and I don’t want to hear it Winchester.”

“You weren’t paying attention Y/n! How could you be so stupid?!”

Y/n stopped in her tracks. They had arguments about hunts before, but he had never taken it this far. Turning around to face him, Y/n looks at Dean to see if he was actually serious.

“Excuse me? Did you just say I was stupid Dean?” The look on her face was terrifying but he wasn’t backing down.

“Yes Y/n, you getting hurt could have been avoided if you weren’t being so reckless, and yes, STUPID!” The venom in his voice as he over exaggerated the word stupid. Y/n could not believe how he was acting.

“If I’m so stupid Dean, you can just hunt without me!” Y/n was trying to stay calm but is was almost too much.

“I’ve got one better. You can just leave.” Dean regretted the words as soon as they passed his lips, but his fear was getting the best of him. The look of heartbreak and sorrow on Y/n’s face was almost enough for him to apologize and beg her to forgive him. He didn’t have time as Y/n picked up her duffle from the war room table and walked out of the bunker without a word.

That is how he ended up here in his room with the gaping hole in his chest. Dean has regretted his words since she walked away from him. Just the thought of her brings tears to his eyes and makes it hard to catch a breath. She is the love of his life. She’ll never know because he was a coward and pushed her away before he could ever speak the words. Dean takes a deep breath to try and keep the tears from spilling down his cheeks.

He has tried everything to forget her, but she is everywhere. He sees her in the kitchen, dancing while cooking them dinner. He sees her in the library with her glasses on the tip of her nose helping Sammy with the lore. He sees her in the backseat of baby, singing along with his cassettes on the way to another hunt. The whiskey bottle they used to share on the hard nights. No matter what he does or where he goes, she is there.

The scent of her is still on her pillow. Dean clings to it every night before he goes to sleep, just wishing he could take everything back. He has never felt so empty, the heartache of losing her nearly too much. Dean hasn’t really left his room since she’s been gone, only if there is a hunt that he can’t delegate. Hunting isn’t even the same without her. Looking in the backseat of Baby expecting to see that smile that always warmed his heart, only to find it empty.

Dean has always been one to push his feelings down with women and whiskey. You could always find him underneath some neon lights with a drink in his hand, and a woman on his arm, but not now. There isn’t a woman on earth or a whiskey strong enough to mend his broken heart.

Dean just stares at the ceiling. He has tried to find her, but she does not want to be found. Sam keeps telling him to give her time, but the longer she’s gone the more he becomes a shell of the man he used to be. He never believed in soul mates or that everyone has someone out there just for them. He knows better now, she was and still is, his everything.

Dean runs a hand down his face and feels the tears he didn’t even know had escaped. How many times has he cried in the last two weeks? He has to do something, he can’t go another day without her, but what can he do that he hasn’t already done? A knock on his door pulls him from his self-demeaning inner monologue.

“You ever going to come back to the land of the living man?” Sam’s head peeking into the room.

“I don’t know Sammy, what do you think?” Sam just ignores the disdain in Dean’s voice.

“Just call her man, you can’t keep going like this.” Sam says as he closes the door.

Dean springs out the bed and nearly falls trying to get to his phone. Why hadn’t he thought of calling her? He dials her number hoping she hasn’t changed it yet. He holds his breath listening to it ring, it finally going to her voicemail.

“Y/n, I’m so sorry baby. I feel terrible for what I said sweetheart. I’m so miserable and I’m missing you and me. Waking up all alone underneath these sheets, and I’m not hungover like you think I would be. I’m just trying to get over another night with you. Please come back, because I can’t keep going with you not by my side. I love you.”

The tone letting him know he’s out of time ringing in his ear. He sighs and puts his phone back on the table in his room. As he lies back down, he prays to Chuck, Cas, or whoever might be listening, that she will come back home. Because, besides the pain, he can’t feel a damn thing. He doesn’t know if he can get through another sober Saturday night.

#dean x reader #dean winchester #spn fanfiction #angst #heartbreak #supernatural family

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babbushka · 4 years

Text

Something Funny

(biggest special thanks to @aweirdlookingtree for inspiring me with a prompt for a Passover oneshot! And sending my love to everyone celebrating tonight!)

Flip Zimmerman x Reader

1.8k ; Pure fluff

--------------

It’s time, he thinks. Time, finally.

You try your best to not appear too ready, not appear too eager. Flip can tell though, he can tell you’re poised to bolt, poised to run and search the house the moment the hunt is called. Sitting across from one another at the long table, you each catch the other’s eyes and look away in a blush, embarrassed for the fact of being caught.

“You’re going down.” You mouth, a wordless promise of defeat.

You’d been doing this all evening, stealing these glances, these looks, all while Flip’s dad stood at the head of the table, all while everyone followed suit for the ritual. You’d played footsie under the table, had smirked at one another, smiled, held back laughs when inappropriate. Your first Seder together, barely having dated for long, but oh, oh how Flip is in love with you. That’s what makes this even more important than normal, for Flip. How he loves you – he has to win, has to beat you.

“In your dreams.” Flip mouths back, and you break into a big grin, accepting and ready for the challenge.

Because now, now it’s time.

It’s all that he can think about when he eats his Ma’s delicious festival dinner, it’s all that’s on his mind as you grin at him so smug, so sure of yourself that you’re going to win behind your glass of grape juice. He had to beat you, had to find it – Flip had to find the afikomen before you.

It’d been something that you’ve both been talking a big game about, for the whole week leading up to Pesach. Every time Flip would drive his dad’s Oldsmobile to pick you up, you’d greet one another with a new idea for what the winner would get, should they find the matzah first when Seder was nearly over.

Each time, you made the stakes higher and higher, the both of you going back and forth with “well when I win I want…” “oh yeah okay well when I win, you have to…”

Such outrageous ideas had included you making Flip wear a shirt with polka dots all over it instead of his normal plaid and Flip making you eat his cooking for an entire day. Outrageous, indeed.

In the end, you wound up not actually telling the other what you really wanted, electing to keep it a surprise, a secret for the big night.

But if Flip found it first, if if if.

If he were so lucky to find the matzah first, as the winner his prize would be a kiss.

Not just any kiss either, a kiss that he gets to pick the time and place of, and he had already asked for permission to spend the weekend at the family cabin out in the mountains. He’d ask for his kiss there, if he won.

He’s nervous, he’s sweating, palms wiping against the fabric of his nice dress pants. He wonders if his yarmulke is crooked, wonders if you can see it. He momentarily gets hung up on how beautiful you look, how stunning, gorgeous in the low light of the dining room. It’s so dark outside, and yet somehow you are glowing, always. He is sure that even Elijah must be enraptured with you, with your beauty.

He shakes his head, clears his thoughts of the never-ending inner monologue of how much he loves you. You smile at him, bite the inside of your cheek. He has to keep his head in the game, he thinks, you’re cunning, you’re clever, surely you had worn your finest dress and done your hair so prettily on purpose, a means to distract him. But he can’t be distracted any longer, the dinner is over, you and he both know it, you can tell, all the food having been enjoyed and all the chatter coming to a pleasant stop.

You look at one another from across the table, before looking at Flip’s Ma, who is clearly trying to hide the smile that peeks through her cloth napkin as she wipes her face.

“On my mark,” She says, because she knows – of course she knows, Flip tells her everything, she knows and she knows how much this means to both you and him, “………………….go!”

You and Flip are out of your seats in an instant.

While you had both been so good trying to keep yourselves calm during the Seder, now you can’t stop laughing, can’t stop grinning. Flip has a plan – search the kitchen then living room then the den. He had paid attention to his Ma’s footsteps, used his budding detective skills to listen where she went, and she hadn’t gone upstairs. She hadn’t gone into the garage our outside either, so it had to be there, had to be there somewhere.

He was also lucky to have a better vantage point, as he was on the side of the table closest to the kitchen. It would seem that you had a similar plan, and Flip rushed to get ahead of you, laughing all the way.

“Hey, ladies first!” You complained, trying to literally elbow your way around him as you both began rummaging through cabinets, looking in the fridge, checking above it and behind it even.

“Age before beauty ketsl.” Flip winked, picking you up and physically moving you out of the way so he could lift up the couch cushions, look underneath the coffee table.

“I swear if she told you or hinted at where she was hiding it – ” You warn with no malice, whirling to point a finger at him for a moment, wag it in his direction.

Flip pinches your nose, gives your face a playful shake before bumping his hip against yours in the race to the den.

“She didn’t, I promise I promise – hey!” He laughs, as you somehow remembered the layout of his house and knew a shortcut he didn’t think of, somehow appearing in the den before you.

You both go through the whole room, the last room on the first floor in the immediate area that weren’t bathrooms. Flip didn’t think his ma would have hid food in the bathroom, but he checks just in case, coming up short.

You both look at each other, panting, out of breath from the excitement, and Flip scratches the back of his neck.

“Outside?” You prompt, figuring might as well look, it could be on the porch or in the mailbox, your family has done that before.

“No I didn’t hear the front door open.” Flip shakes his head, making you laugh brightly.

“You’re not supposed to help me honey.” You reply warmly, putting your hands on your hips. This was a competition, after all. There was going to be a winner and a loser, and it had to be a fair fight.

“Oh you’re right, never mind ketsl, definitely go check outside.” Flip rolled his eyes playfully, stuck his thumb in the direction of the front door.

You only laughed, sighed a little and looked up at him like he was the most dreamy thing in the whole world. He wished desperately that he could have a cigarette, that he could have you.

You leave then, sprinting down the hall, checking the coat closet, checking the pantry, anywhere you might have overlooked. Flip chases after you, and he can hear catches of conversation in the dining room as the two of you run past, laughing and play-fighting with one another.

Eventually, you meet back in the den, after having split up to look for the matzah that was really damn well hidden.

“You still didn’t find it?” Flip asks with a frown, and you shake your head, sit down on the ledge near the mantle of the fireplace, which is softly crackling and warming the early April night.

“No, you?” You reply, patting the space next to you.

Flip sits down eagerly, happily, always happy to be next to you. You lean your head on his shoulder, wrap your arms around his big bicep and sigh.

“No.” Flip answers you, trying to think what his Ma did with the damn cracker. “Huh.”

“Well we can’t go back without it.” You pillow your cheek against him.

Boldly, he presses a kiss to the top of your head, wraps his arm around your shoulders. You were both stumped, and both unsure. There were no plans in place for an outcome like this, who won if no one found the matzah?

“What do you propose we do?” Flip asks, always deferring to you, always wanting in the end, nothing more than for you to be happy.

You shrug, look up at him, look at him with your big eyes, eyes that are so full of love. Flip’s heart beats a little quicker, he swallows around a lump in his throat.

“You want to know something funny?” Flip asks softly when you don’t offer any suggestions, when the weight of his adoration for you squeezes his chest too tightly.

“Tell me.” You nuzzle your cheek against his shoulder, your eyes sparkling in the light of the fireplace, a smile on your lips, always ready to hear anything Flip ever had to say.

“I was going to ask you to kiss me.” He confesses, and really, why was it such a confession? You were dating, he was your boyfriend, had been your boyfriend for a little while. Long enough that you had certainly already kissed before.

But your kisses…they were magic, Flip thought. They were a privilege, something to be earned. He had to earn them, had to prove he was worth them. It didn’t matter that you’ve never once denied him, it didn’t matter that you’d asked for a kiss every day, ever time you see one another.

You grin to yourself, grow bashful then.

“You want to know something funnier?” You ask back, and Flip nods, too lost in your eyes to even really speak, especially when you bite the inside of your cheek and admit, “So was I.”

And you know, if his Ma had orchestrated the entire thing where the matzah was simply hidden behind her back the whole time, you didn’t mind. If his family asked where you were and sent her out to look for you, you didn’t mind that either. Because on the night of Pesach, the first Seder you spent together, you spend it with love.

And as his Ma hides in the doorway, watching her one and only son bestow the most gentle of kisses upon the girl she was sure would one day be his wife, well.

Barech could wait.

---------------

Chag kasher v’samei-ach to everyone celebrating tonight!

Tagging some Flip loving friends:

@kyloxfem @heldcaptivebychaos @solotriplets @formerly-anonhamster @lookinsidemyhead @candycanes19 @adamsnacc-kler @taylovren-types @whiskey-bumblebee @magikevalynn @tinyplanet-explorers @chelsjnov @romancedeldiablo @helloimindelaware @elfieboxcat @laurenshit @autumnlovesadam @peterisparker @goodboybensolo @intrestellarsarah @the-marvelatic @miasera @emily-strange @proxyfoxy @disaster-rose @hazydespair @yosoymuyloca @1-800-choke-that-snoke @ktellmeastory @anongirl007 @zimmerxman @okk–maaan @flapjacques @aweirdlookingtree @callmemania-pls

#flip zimmerman x reader #flip zimmerman/reader #flip x reader #flip zimmerman/you #flip zimmerman imagine #flip zimmerman fluff #young flip #flip zimmerman fanfic #blackkklansman #blackkklansman fanfic #my writing

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repulsivepangolin7 · 4 years

Text

Fic: Barbeque

A/N: Alright, so I played nice last time and I didn’t hurt anyone in that fic. Not even Luca. Well, then I made this little thing. Hope you enjoy it.

Word count: 1 782

All different sorts of meat was cooking on the grill. Hondo was taking the responsibility of chef seriously, and kept an eye on it. He had barbeque forceps in one hand and a glass of whiskey in the other.

Chris sat with her legs crossed under her, she had a cold beer resting on the table in front of her.

Deacon had some whiskey in a glass in front of him, chilled down by a couple of big ice cubes. He had one elbow rested on the table. The thumb of his other hand was hooked in his front pocket.

Tan had his hands wrapped around a drink he had mixed, squinting up at the sun above them.

Street held a glass bottle of coke up to the side of his face. He had his feet kicked up on the edge of Chris’s chair. The left side of his face still stung a bit from acquiring a new shiner the day before.

Luca had his right arm balanced on the table, like he was getting ready for a shadow arm-wrestling match. The fresh cast covering his lower arm promised that he wouldn’t do any arm-wrestling with that arm for the next couple of months. Next to his elbow a glass a tiny bit larger than a regular shot glass stood, golden tequila filling about half of it. In his left hand he held a bottle of beer by the neck.

“Anyone up for a burger?” Hondo called out, “I think they’re ready now.”

Deacon nodded and stood up,

“Anyone else?” Hondo asked looking over at the table.

Street nodded against the cool bottle. Tan also nodded and got up.

“So, how’s the head?” Chris smirked over at Street.

“Well, the doctor said I didn’t have any signs of a concussion, but I still have a slight headache…” Street shrugged.

“Well, guess it is like that sometimes.” Luca shrugged, “Getting someone’s fist slammed into your face is never a good day.”

Street hitched up one shoulder, “Guess not. Speaking of arms, how’s your wrist?”

Luca shrugged and took a swig of his beer, clearly considering his answer before he swallowed, “It’s fine. And it’s not really my wrist that took the brunt of it.”

Street nodded.

“Whatever, I’ve had worse…” Luca served up a lopsided grin, “I grew up back when child passenger safety meant your dad’s arm coming at you at the speed of light if you were about to crash into something. Not exactly the same as an airbag.”

Chris chuckled, “Let me guess, your biggest idol was Evel Knievel as well…”

“Hey, every boy growing up in the 70’s had him as their idol.” Luca shrugged, “You can bet I’m not the only one in this backyard with a couple of Evel Knievel scars from their childhood.”

“He’s right about that!” Deacon admitted as he sat back down by the table, one plate with a freshly grilled burger for him, and one for Street. “You know that scar I’ve got on the back of my left shoulder?”

The others by the table nodded, “A couple buddies and I had built a ramp, we were going to jump over each other. You know, like if the ones laying on the ground was the monster trucks and the guy with the bike was Evel… Well, I was first out as Evel. Turned out that we had grossly oversized the ramp.”

Luca grimaced, “Hey, we’ve all done that mistake. That always left you with roadrash. I remember once we built a ramp. I was the last ‘monster truck’, so to speak…”

Deacon frowned before Luca had gotten around to explaining how it all ended. He knew where it was going.

“Well. My younger brother, Terry, didn’t build up enough speed or the ramp was too small.” Luca shrugged, “Landed rear tire on my stomach. That was not fun.”

Street frowned and looked over at Chris, “Alright, that’s it. I wouldn’t have survived growing up with those two…”

Chris nodded, “Yeah, me neither.”

“Oh, come on!” Hondo chuckled, “It was a fun time! The world was a pretty safe place, or at least it felt like it.”

“It just felt like it!” Tan shook his head, “Do you know how many kids died in accidents back then compared to now? The statistics are pretty clear and obvious.”

Luca shrugged, “Yeah? Somehow I still want to claim that we were always fine…”

Tan shook his head a little, chuckling a bit.

“Hey, Chris. Luca…” Hondo whistled to get their attention, “Do you guys want burgers to start with, or?”

“Nah, I’m waiting for the pork chops…” Luca grinned over at their team leader.

“Yeah, same here!” Chris nodded.

“Alright, those are still a few minutes out.” Hondo shrugged and flipped something on the grill.

Luca nodded and took another sip of his beer, “Thanks for inviting us! That’s really cool!”

“Hey, had been too long since we just hung out together.” Hondo grinned back, taking a generous sip of his whiskey.

“Sure had.” Chris nodded and grabbed a tortilla chip and some salsa from the table.

Luca smirked and flexed and extended his fingers a few times. He knew it was important to help out his circulation like that, and to work on keeping the mobility of his fingers while his arm was in a cast. He couldn’t move his thumb though, it was trapped in the cast allowing a small break near the base of his thumb to heal, along with the breaks further up his arm.

“Good burger Hondo!” Street grinned and raised his coke bottle towards Hondo.

“Thanks!” Hondo grinned as he assembled a burger for himself, “There’s more of them if you want more.”

“Well, first I have to finish up this one…” Street chuckled, “But believe me, I will swoop in for seconds.”

Chris chuckled, “No one’s surprised… You food wreck.”

Street grinned and jerked one thumb towards Luca, “No, that’s him…”

“Can’t really argue with that…” Luca shrugged a little.

“Then why ain’t you chomping down on a burger right now…” Chris raised her eyebrows questioningly.

Luca waved the fingers of his casted arm a bit, and Chris dipped her head in embarrassment.

“Did not switch on my brain for that one…” she rolled her eyes.

Luca nodded, “Nah, looks like you didn’t. Thick homestyle burgers ain’t exactly the easiest thing to eat when you’re one arm down.”

Chris nodded. “Yeah, and not exactly something you eat with knife and fork either.”

Luca nodded and placed his beer on the table, looking down at the half full shot glass near his elbow. He picked it up and took a sip of it. Causing Deacon to shudder.

With a mischievous grin he looked over at Deacon after he had swallowed the golden liquid. “What?”

“I don’t get how you can drink that stuff..”

“Tequila?”

Deacon nodded with a sour grimace.

“It’s good.” Luca shrugged, “You know, as long as you don’t drink it like a college student during spring break.”

Deacon shuddered again, “Nope. I still have PTSD from a soaking wet night filled with tequila when I was Street’s age. I can barely look at it without my stomach disagreeing with me.”

Luca grinned and leaned over to pick up the tequila bottle, “Sure you don’t want some?”

“Completely sure.” Deacon nodded.

“Anyone else?”

“Yeah, I could go for a shot.” Chris nodded and picked up one of the clean shot glasses from the middle of the table.

“Me too.” Tan smiled, “Thanks.”

“Street?”

“No. I’m not going to drink today.” He shook his head a little, “I don’t want to wake up with a hangover on top of this slightly annoying headache tomorrow.”

“Alright, that’s fair.” Luca nodded, “I would probably have made the same call.”

Street nodded, “But if you need help pouring, I’m up for that.”

Luca looked up from where he had the bottle of tequila trapped between his knees in an attempt to unscrew the cap one handed. “Well, I can do it myself…”

“Yeah, and I’m pretty sure it’s easier for me.” Street shrugged.

Luca shrugged a little, but handed the bottle over to Street, “Thanks man…”

“Don’t mention it…” Street shrugged back and undid the cap, then poured up shots for the three who wanted tequila.

“Thanks.” Luca grinned once more as Street filled his shot glass with tequila.

“Hey, I bet we could make him agree to let us draw on his cast if we get him drunk enough…” Tan thought out loud as Street poured into his glass.

The three young teammates and Deacon immediately looked over at Luca.

“Oh, NO WAY!” Luca shook his head, “Not going to happen!”

“Come on, a little cast art don’t hurt…” Chris teased.

“Not going to happen.” Luca shook his head, “Drawings and get well messages on casts are for kids and people who’s never broken anything before.”

The four others at the table looked at each other. The bet was on.

SWATSWATSWAT

An alarm started blaring next to his head and it almost felt like it was trying to notify him that this was Pearl Harbor and planes were incoming. He reached out with his left hand and managed to kill the alarm. His head and right arm was throbbing like it was a competition.

He had no recollection of the second half of the barbeque at Hondo’s place, nor how he managed to get home afterwards. He had no doubt Street was the one to thank for not waking up in a ditch somewhere.

His stomach started to churn, and he knew the signs well enough to know that he had about 30 seconds to get into position in front of the toilet before the liquor of yesterday took the speed elevator back up.

He got up in a hurry and rushed to the bathroom.

SWATSWATSWAT

“Praying to the toilet fairies?” Street smirked as he opened the door a bit.

“Shut up.”

“Hey, I thought about getting some hangover grub for you. How does a GREASY hamburger sound?”

“I hate you…”

Street chuckled, “Served up in a dirty ashtray of course…”

Luca started heaving.

Street stood by the door, leaning on the frame and studying the damage he had caused with an amused smirk.

“Really hate you!” Luca followed up once his stomach had stopped evacuating its contents for long enough that he could answer.

“You’re going to hate me even more.”

“Yeah?”

“Check your cast.”

Luca looked up from the bowl, groaned and sighed. “Alright, you won…”

“I’ve got a couple of bottles of coke for you, and salt pretzels. Figured you would have the hangover of all hangovers.

“Thanks.”

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chucksbruins · 5 years

Text

two ghosts, ch. 7

Author’s Note: So sorry this took so long but hope you guys enjoy!

Things after the party returned to relatively normal between Eliza and Tyler, save for the occasional text from her congratulating him on a big game, or him complaining about having to deal with Meredith and Roope’s overzealous flirting. Eliza wouldn’t call their relationship a friendship, but they were definitely more than just acquaintances. On the few times that Meredith had managed to drag her to a nightclub and the Stars showed up, they exchanged pleasantries but he never bought her more than one drink before his attention was swept away by a leggy blonde or the occasional brunette. Eliza was at least glad he diversified his conquests on the occasion.

Whilst neither friends nor acquaintances, they had certainly never crossed the line of asking the other to hang out outside of an unplanned run-in or group activity. Until Tyler’s name had popped up on Eliza’s phone screen twenty minutes earlier with a simple request.

“Are you busy tonight? I need to see you.”

A million scenarios ran through Eliza’s mind, her emotions ranging from complete confusion to curiosity that couldn’t be denied. She responded to let him know that she was in fact free and asked what time he was thinking.

“9 pm. I’ll come to yours.”

Unsure how he could possibly have remembered her address from the one time he dropped her home, a new sense of worry washed over her. She knew she should have taken an Uber. Pushing her thoughts aside, she quickly changed from her sweatpants into a pair of grey leggings, throwing a knitted sweater over her T-shirt with 10 minutes to spare. Adding a spritz of her favorite perfume, she looked in the mirror and debated putting on makeup but figured her natural look was better than rushing and looking like a clown. Just as she was swiping on a coat of lip balm, the doorbell rang.

The sight of Tyler standing in her doorway was almost comical. Besides the way his broad shoulders just barely fit between the width of the door, his tailored pants and suit jacket screamed money while the peeling paint of her doorway said the opposite. Everything about the picture just seemed out of place and only reaffirmed to Eliza that a guy like Tyler did not belong in her life. His brows were furrowed, but otherwise his face gave no indication of his emotions.

“Can I come in?”

Eliza stepped back to allow him space to get by her, letting out a quiet breath as she shut the door behind him. She followed him, suddenly nervous, as he made his way into her apartment. She couldn’t explain the feelings of anxiety that coursed through her as she watched him take in her small living room and even smaller kitchen. She squeezed her eyes shut, forcing the memories of the last time she had been in the same apartment as a man out of her mind. Tyler, whilst sometimes and asshole and most definitely a playboy, was not Evan.

“Can I get you anything? Tea? Water?”

Tyler finally turned around and gave her a wry smile. “Got anything stronger than that?”

Eliza laughed. “So, it’s that kind of night, hey?”

Fishing through her top cabinet, she pulled out a bottle of Jameson and set it on the counter as Tyler followed her into her kitchen. Pouring a sizeable amount into two glasses, she joined Tyler at the small table where Tyler was now sprawled.

“So....are you going to explain why you’re here?” Eliza asked, her voice more abrasive than she’d meant.

Tyler stared down at his glass before taking a hefty swig and emptying it. Eliza quirked an eyebrow as he finally lifted his eyes to meet her own.

“I needed a distraction and you were the first person I thought to call.”

Eliza scoffed, using all of her self-control to refrain from rolling her eyes at him. She took a sip of her own drink before continuing on.

“Tyler, we both know that’s just simply not true. I’m sure there are a million and two ‘Ashley’s’ in your phone who would just die for your name to pop up on their screen. Plus, I’m not sure what kind of distraction you had in mind, but I’m not sleeping with you just for you to feel better.”

Tyler stared unamused at Eliza, although she was unsure whether the flush across his cheeks was indicative of the whiskey that was coursing through his system or from her knowingly calling him out.

“Eliza I’m very aware there are other girls I could easily call if all I needed was a fuck.”

Downing the rest of her drink, she stood abruptly from the table, slamming her glass on the counter before turning back to him in annoyance.

“Alright, well if you’re not here to get laid why are you here Tyler. And maybe try answering the fucking question without insulting me this time.”

Letting out a heavy breath, Tyler made his way to Eliza, leaning his hip against the counter and towering over her.

“Hey, hey, hey I’m sorry okay? I came here to talk because you’re the only person in my whole fucking life that I figured wouldn’t care about the fact that I haven’t scored in a month who wouldn’t try to just sleep with me to make me ‘feel better’.”

The accusatory hardness that held Eliza’s features softened, her brows furrowing as her eyes filled with a warmth that Tyler couldn’t deny pierced through his exasperation and spread through his chest. It was a feeling Tyler had been unfamiliar with for a very long time, and everything in him screamed to push her away, knowing he had already admitted too much. He couldn’t explain what had compelled him to text Eliza after their crushing loss and while his head battled with whether or not it had been a good idea, one look in her eyes made him feel calmness like he never had before.

Letting out a sigh, Eliza hesitated, drawing her lip between her teeth before folding herself into Tyler’s chest. As if on instinct, his arms wrapped around her small body as his head dropped onto her head as he squeezed her closer. Tyler truly couldn’t remember the last time he had hugged someone off the rink after a goal, and all of Dallas was enjoying reminding him that that hadn’t happened in far too long.

On the other hand, Eliza wasn’t entirely sure what compelled her to wrap herself around Tyler’s firm torso, knowing only that the sadness and frustration in his eyes were too much for her to handle. The only thing that ran through her mind was her mother’s voice, soft and kind as she would squeeze Eliza’s small body into her own and remind her that ‘Every problem in the world can be made a little bit better with a hug’. As she felt the tension release from his body, Eliza started to pull away, Tyler reluctantly dropped his arms from around her waist although the two remained only inches apart.

“Sorry,” Eliza mumbled, her eyes trained on his dress shoes as a sudden shyness overcame her.

“Don’t. Don’t apologize,” Tyler replied, his voice low and filled with seriousness.

Eliza sighed, turning back to the sink as she rinsed the two glasses before setting them back into the cupboard.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked quietly, her voice heavy with sincerity.

The pair made their way to the couch, falling into the old leather on opposite ends. Tyler took in the room around him; it was small and sparse of photos or mementos but still radiated warmth – much like the girl sat across from him. Leaning his head against the back of the couch, he let out a breath and began.

“I just, when I moved here from Boston I was determined not to be as lonely as I had been there. I mean, when I got drafted I was just a kid, you know? And they stuck me in this big high-rise apartment – the dream – but I was all alone. Didn’t know how to cook, barely knew how to do my own laundry, I was totally pathetic. Obviously, the guys were great, Marchy’s still one of my best friends, but they all had lives. Like they were all family guys or had a rocket of a girlfriend that they’d somehow found before they got drafted or who had stuck around for longer than a few months.”

Pausing, Tyler glanced back at Eliza whose eyes were fixed on him and never had he had anyone appear to listen so intently to the things he was saying outside of the press room. Shifting a few inches closer to him, she gave him a tight smile to encourage him to continue.

“Boston’s a huge sports city, right? So obviously the minute I started scoring goals people started recognizing me wherever I went. Which at first was totally awesome, I was this eighteen year old kid who could get served at any bar I wanted, had like twenty-five year old rockets slipping me their number on the street, it seemed like the life. Since all the other guys were busy with their families or whatever, I made other friends – guys I’d meet when I went out and eventually they became my friends. But the thing is, I was playing better than I ever had – hell we won the Stanley that year – but if I wasn’t out at a club I was alone at home save for the random girl who forced herself home with me.”

Eliza quirked an eyebrow at him.

“Okay fine, who I brought home with me.”

She smiled fully this time, inching ever closer once again.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is that Boston was awesome for hockey but awful for me and I swore it was going to be different when I got to Dallas. Don’t get me wrong, Jamie is the best friend I’ve ever had but he’s basically married to Katie and I feel like I’m just right back to where I started. I know I’m not great at the whole adult thing, hell the longest relationship I’ve ever had is with my dogs but now that I can’t seem to score a fucking goal, it’s like I can’t even do hockey right.”

Eliza could feel her heart breaking in her chest, and in that moment she felt like she could see past all the bullshit and bluster that Tyler gave to everyone else. She still couldn’t explain why he deemed her the one he could talk to about all of this, but she immediately felt like she understood why he came off the way he did. Despite all of the fans and his posse of adoring women, at the end of the day all he had was himself and his dogs. And not to say dogs can’t keep the bed warm and aren’t great companions, but sometimes you just need a person. Hell, Eliza could probably understand that better than anyone – in all the months prior to leaving Boston, despite the millions of signs telling her that she needed to get out, she was terrified that she couldn’t make it on her own.

Closing the rest of the space between them, Eliza reached out and took Tyler’s hand in her own and gave him a squeeze. Meeting her eyes, two sad and broken souls finally felt seen.

Speaking softly, Eliza trained her eyes on their conjoined hands before continuing. “Tyler, you have to know you’re more than just a hockey player. There’s undoubtedly so many people who would love you just as much as they do now even if you never picked up a hockey stick.”

“Fewer than you’d think,” he muttered, his eyes still fixed on her delicate features.

Pausing before continuing, Eliza swallowed her nerves and figured her pride wasn’t worth the comfort that the man in front of her so clearly needed.

“I liked you before I ever knew you played hockey.”

Upon seeing the smile that started to creep across his face, she smiled before clarifying, “Annoying, yes. Way too cocky and very much in love with himself? Most definitely. But I didn’t not like you.”

Pulling her closer towards him by their conjoined hands, Eliza’s body was jolted from her position on the couch and fell on top of his hard chest. Weaving his large hand around the base of her skull, he intertwined his fingers in her hair as their foreheads fell together.

“You know something Lizzie? I don’t not like you either.”

#tyler seguin #tyler seguin imagine #dallas stars #dallas stars imagine #hockey imagine #tyler seguin fanfic

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dontlikedarkness · 4 years

Note

Happier by Ed Sheeran prompt. Duncan sees Courtney with another man a 2 years after their breakup.

There had been a time, once, where Duncan had been Courtney’s everything. She was still his - there was no mistaking that - but that time where they only had eyes for each other, where they spent every waking moment together and relished each other’s touch, was long since gone. Two years was a long time to be apart. He had loved her all the while.

A lot of wallowing occurred before Geoff could convince him to go out again. It was made worse by the lack of closure; they had been at different places in their lives, according to Courtney, but he would’ve gone to the ends of the earth for her. He had begged her to stay, had said everything right, and still she’d left him. Without a big fight or a definitive end to things, his feelings had lingered. Days turned into weeks turned into months, and he loved her still. Everyone said he would move on, but how could he?

Leaving the house again was a gradual process. Going to work was a given as he still had bills and rent to pay, but beyond that, he could hardly leave his bed. DJ would force his way into the apartment to cook for him, and Geoff made a point of visiting twice a week, but it took a month and a half for him to get up and to say more than a few words to them at a time. He’d folded in on himself after she left - like his entire identity revolved around her. It did, in a sense.

It was nothing short of a miracle when they finally got him to go somewhere. It had been a long six months of chasing him around his apartment - eventually they’d gotten him to visit their own places, and even to let them invite Bridgette and a few other close friends, but still he’d refused to go any further. When he agreed to visit the animal shelter with DJ, Geoff had half a mind to ambush him with a surprise party. DJ spent a solid week talking him down, and even then, Geoff made a show of tagging along and inviting them for drinks at his place afterwards. It wasn’t much, but the pair of them were secretly relieved to see Duncan leaving his hovel, as they’d so lovingly dubbed his tiny studio apartment. It helped to see him genuinely happy, for the first time in months.

Eventually, their outings became routine, and Duncan found that he was content. He was laughing again, and being social - he went longer and longer spaces of time without thinking about Courtney. That ache was still there, but he was no longer quite so conscious of it.

Two years had come and gone in a heartbeat. Everything was repetitive, and his days blurred together, but he was still content. He no longer scanned every crowd for her face; his hand didn’t feel as empty, and he wasn’t so cold at night, without the warmth of her body draped over his. He dreamt of her still, but they were quiet, peaceful dreams, of picnics at sunset and rides on his bike instead of the dreams where she left again, where he could hear the echo of the door slamming behind her every time he shook awake.

Going to the bar was no longer so strange an idea. He’d go every so often, accompanied by Geoff and by Gwen, a pretty tattoo artist he’d struck up a friendship with a few months ago. Soon her girlfriend, Zoey, started to tag along, and then came her friends, Mike and Cameron and a few others he’d never bothered to learn the names of, and then DJ started to bring his boyfriend, and then Noah and Owen joined the group, and suddenly they were having massive outings and as overwhelming as it was to have that many people around, it provided an easy distraction. He had been caught on multiple occasions trying to send a drunk-text to Courtney, glancing around guiltily while he tapped away at his phone. Someone had always noticed, and stopped him before it was too late. With so many people around, often there was too much going on for him to have the space to think - and he liked it that way. Watching Gwen slam down whiskey sours like it was nothing and having to coax Owen down from tables meant he didn’t have the time to get emotional and make bad decisions.

There had always been an unspoken agreement that Bridgette was not to be invited to these things, no matter how much Geoff moaned and griped about missing her. Duncan didn’t have a problem with the girl, and they got along well whenever he crashed at their place, but she was Courtney’s best friend above all else, and she could be rather ditsy at times. The chance of her forgetting that Duncan was going and inviting her was too high.

“Dude, c’mon, it’s been two years,” Geoff whined, sidling up to Duncan with the saddest, dopiest look on his face that he could possibly manage. DJ noted Duncan’s answering scowl and shook his head, leaning back against the counter as best he could, given that it was short even by normal standards and that his stature was far above normal, hitting the 7 foot mark. “Geoff’s right, man. He promised that Bridge won’t invite her, anyways. Wouldn’t it be nice to have her around?”

Duncan threw up his arms in defeat. “Fine, fine, Bridge can come. But don’t think I’m happy about it.” Geoff made a noise not entirely unlike that of an air horn, pumping his fist in the air with all the excitement of someone who had just won the lottery. “Thank you, dude. You won’t regret it,” he promised. Something told Duncan he would.

***

His motorcycle had given him a great deal of trouble when starting it up, so he arrived at the bar nearly an hour late, already more than a little pissed off. He had several missed calls from DJ and absolutely none from Geoff, which wasn’t much of a surprise, given he now had his girlfriend there to keep him distracted. He fired off a few placating texts before setting his phone to silent and getting in line. Had he left his phone on, he might’ve been spared. Luck was not on his side that night, it seemed.

It wasn’t difficult to pick out DJ from the crowd, given how much he towered over everybody there. He wasted no time in joining his friend at the bar and ordering a couple shots of tequila. One look at the big man had him sliding a shot his way - he seemed visibly distressed, opening and closing his mouth as though there was something he wanted to say.

“No boyfriend tonight?” He asked, hoping to set DJ a little more at ease. “Not tonight, no,” he responded, his words clipped, eyes fixed on a point past his head. Duncan turned with a frown, curious as to what was taking up his attention.

He wished he hadn’t looked. Maybe he could have remained oblivious, if a little concerned about his friend, and saved himself the heartache.

Because there she was, looking just as gorgeous as she had on the day she’d left, if not more so. She was all legs and curves, and her dress did little to hide it. Her hair was longer, now, and her freckles a little darker, as though she was spending more time in the sun. DJ’s hand on his arm startled him back to reality, and he blanched, having stepped towards her without meaning to. “Courtney,” he breathed, wrenching free of his friend’s grasp. He needed to see her, needed to tell her how much he missed her, how much he loved her, and-

He froze. His veins turned to ice, and he thought he might shatter, right then and there. An arm was wrapped around her waist, large and muscled and possessive, and the way she leaned into the unfamiliar man’s shoulder implied they were a lot more than friends. The man said something, and she laughed, a loud, pretty laugh. Fuck, how he’d missed her laugh.

What hurt the most wasn’t the man there with her. It wasn’t the way she laughed, or how much he missed her, or the fact that he was seeing her at all. No, what hurt the most was her smile, because in all their years together she’d never looked that happy. She was positively radiant now, glowing from the inside out, and it was the most heartbreakingly beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

He clenched his hands into fists until his nails dug little crescents into his palms. And then he turned around, wallet out, and slammed a hundred dollar bill onto the counter. “Whatever bottle of liquor that’ll buy me is fine,” he ground out, ignoring DJ’s worried glances.

He found some secluded corner and planted himself there, taking long swigs from his drink. Eventually he lost count of how many friends had approached him to check up on him. He didn’t care. As the bottle emptied, so did the dance floor, and still he didn’t budge.

Nobody hurt her the way I did, he told himself, in an attempt to dissuade any thoughts of marching up to her and spilling his guts. But nobody loved her the way I did - the way I do - and nobody needs her as much, a second voice piped up, and he scowled, pushing the thought down. I was happier with her. So, so much happier.

But it was too late. She’d slipped through his fingers, and here she was. Happy. With somebody else.

As the night drew to a close, and almost everyone filed out of the bar, he was surprised to see her linger. They locked eyes, just once, right as he pulled the now-empty bottle away from his lips. I’ll be here, waiting, his eyes seemed to say, if he ever breaks your heart. Her answering gaze was so sad and so gentle that it took everything in him not to cry out in anguish. I know.

#thank youu anon #i had a lot of fun writing this!#ask box #duncney #total drama #total drama courtney #total drama duncan #td courtney #td duncan #song fic #dontlikedarkness

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blackmissfrizzle · 5 years

Text

Hot for Teacher part 3

Title: Hot for Teacher part 3

Characters: Steve Rogers x black!reader

Summary: The reader and Steve finally have their date

Warnings: Pre-smut, creepy dudes, and a long ass chapter and no keep reading cuz its mobile

A couple of drinks after your little performance, everyone decided to call it a night and went home. Well everyone except Shantae, she went home with Sam. Steve offered to take you home, but you declined his offer but you told him you would text him when you got home.

As soon as you entered your home, you texted Steve that you made it because if you didn’t, you surely would’ve forgotten.

“Texting Rogers you made it home,” a familiar voice from the shadows asked.

You dropped your keys into the bowl by your door and sighed. “You can’t just text me if I made it home safely like a regular dad?”

Nick Fury never did anything like a regular dad, except the fussing part. You remember the whoopings you used to get because you decided to be a smartass.

Your dad let your pet cat, Goose down, emerged from his seat and gave you a hug. “I’m not a normal dad, sweetie.”

“I’ve noticed. What are you doing here so late, old man? I hope you don’t want a report on my night with Steve.”

Your dad let you out of his embrace and returned to the couch. “No, I’m not even worried about Rogers. Now if you were going out with Stark, we would have a problem. I’m praying that this thing with Rogers work out. Your mama is already planning your wedding and for her future grandkids.”

You threw a pillow at your dad. “You told mama about Steve!?” You slinked down the couch in despair, your mom’s been bugging you about kids since you were an only child. She didn’t care if you got married, she just wanted grandkids.

“You know she’s a better investigator than I am. I couldn’t lie to her.” Its true, no one could lie to your mom, she had a knack for getting to the truth. “Anyways, I’m here to officially recruit you,” your dad stated as he slid a manila folder towards you.

Inside of the folder were photos of a local gang leader, Terrence and he recruited a lot of kids that go to your school. He truly was a menace to society. He didn’t care who got hurt as long as money was lining his pocket. As you went through more photos, you saw Terrence with an older gentleman.

“The older guy with Terrence works for Ghost, a terrorist who probably has done as much as evil as HYDRA. I know you got a couple of students connected with Terrence. I need you to find out what Terrence has planned with Ghost.”

On occasion, you were known to get involved with your students’ personal lives if they were in trouble. One instance, you fought in an underground fight club match so your student wouldn’t have to, but that was different. Your dad wanted you to work for SHIELD in an official capacity and that was big deal.

You pinched your nose, “This is a one-time thing. And I’m only doing this for the kids.”

Knowing that he won, your dad broke out into a shit-eating grin that few people got to witness. “Thanks, sweetheart. I’ll have Hill send you a briefing within the next 72 hours and you’ll report to me on Saturdays. Now I’ll see myself out.” He gave you a kiss on the temple on his way out.

Great, in the same night you landed a date with Steve Rogers and became a SHIELD agent.

The following days you and Steve were texting and talking non-stop. Sometimes it was silly stuff about the stuff he missed while he was in the ice. At least he knew about the greats like, Marvin Gaye and Aretha, but you had to put him on Beyoncé and the masterwork of Lemonade. Other times you would talk about more serious stuff like, his time in the army or you training as a super spy as a child.

One day, Steve actually stopped by your school during your planning period to bring you lunch, since you told him earlier that you didn’t eat anything that day, because you were so busy. Even though, you couldn’t talk to him because you allowed some students to come for a tutoring session, he stayed and helped you by grading some papers. You were convinced that Steve was angel and you were praying that everything would work out.

Friday came before you knew it, but the day dragged on. Somehow, your students found out that your date with Steve was that night and they teased you all day long, especially since they could sense you were anxious. When 3:30 stroked, you practically ran out with the students and sped out the parking lot.

Arriving home in record time, you decided to try and take a nap, because if you stayed up you would’ve gotten ready early and been a nervous wreck. The week must’ve caught up with you, because you had no trouble taking a nap.

—

Soon, you found yourself knocking on Steve’s door at exactly 7pm. He invited you over for dinner and the dance lesson at his place, because when he went out in public people typically recognized him and asked for pictures and he didn’t want to subject you to that invasion of privacy yet.

The breath was knocked out of you when Steve opened the door. He had on an apron over a blue Henley and black jeans, and you didn’t know if it was the domesticity of the apron, the tightness of the Henley, or a combination of both, but you had a hard time stopping yourself from jumping Steve’s bones.

“Hey, come on in.” Steve waved you inside and pulled you into his warm embrace. He smelled like the food he was cooking and his cologne, and you wanted to drown yourself in that scent.

“I like your place. Its comfortable and welcoming.” Your eyes wandered Steve’s apartment. It didn’t feel like the typical bachelor pad. He had photos of his old and new friends placed decoratively, a record player, and a couch that made you sleepy from just looking at it.

Steve grabbed your purse and jacket to put them in a chair in the corner. “Thanks. Tony had Pepper come and decorate.”

The smell of the food had you gravitating towards the kitchen. Before you had a chance to look in the pot, Steve is pulled you towards him and shuffled you to a seat at the dinner table. “No peeking,” he jokingly reprimanded you.

You kissed your teeth in disappointment. “That’s not fair. I just wanted to see what was causing my stomach to growl. I should warn you Rogers, I don’t play about my food.”

Steve gave you a deep belly chuckle as he came back to the table with two plates. “Duly noted.” He set before you a plate of shrimp alfredo pasta, one of your favorite dishes. Steve Rogers was really pulling out all the stops if he kept it up, he might just get lucky, you thought to yourself.

As dinner began the two of you made small talk. You talked about how you had to stop a fight between two of your students, because Lyric stepped on Diego’s shoes and then they began arguing about how the other were too broke to afford good shoes. The joke was on them because, both of their Jordans were knockoffs but you didn’t have it in you to break their hearts. Steve told you how Tony caused the electricity to short-circuit during making a new suit.

“Okay Rogers, enough stalling! Its time for your dance lesson,” you announced at the end of dinner. You backed out of your seat and stood by Steve and reached out for his hand.

He grimaced and regretfully placed his hand in yours. “Promise you won’t make fun of me?”

To soothe his nerves, you kissed him on the cheek and whispered into his ear, “I promise.” It was definitely not the kiss that calmed him down, that made him more nervous, but it was the smile that you gave him while you looked into his eyes that did calm him down.

Steve scrolled through his phone until he selected the song he wanted, and then the bluesy guitar riffs of Tennessee Whiskey began to fill the room.

“Ohhh, you wanna learn how to two-step,” you joked.

The super soldier smiled and down casted his eyes to the floor. “Yeah, you did say you love country and the dance seems easy enough, but,” he held up his hand in objection. “I don’t think I’ll be ready for any twirls or lifts.”

It was your turn to give a belly-out laugh. “You’re that bad, huh?”

Steve pulled you into him and swayed the both of you side-to-side. “You’re about to see,” he whispered into your ear.

His dancing wasn’t so bad, but then again you two were only doing a basic slow dance. Confident that he could start doing the two-step, you instructed Steve that he had to take two steps forward and one step back.

After his failed attempts and a couple of stubbed toes, you took the lead to demonstrate how Steve should lead. You took the lead before with your friends, but this time was different because first, Steve obviously wasn’t a female and second, you felt smaller than your dancing partner.

“I think I got the hang of it now. I can lead if you want me to.” Steve commented after you being in the lead for fifteen minutes.

“Are you sure?” Instead of verbally responding, Steve took charge and he was much better than he was at the beginning of the lesson. He would stumble every so often and mumble ‘shit, I’m sorry’, but other than that he was great. Steve even managed to end your last dance with a twirl.

Currently the two you were sharing dessert while sitting on his couch and listening to music.

“So how did I do, teach?” Steve asked between bites.

You nodded your head side-to-side in deep thought. “Umm, it was rough in the beginning. Like for the life of me, I don’t understand how someone who fights in life or death situations and still trips over their own feet while dancing. But you got it at the end and that’s all that matters.”

“True, but I couldn’t have done it without my wonderful teacher.” Steve’s voice dropped lower as he intertwined his fingers with yours.

The both of you sat there in silence while the sexual tension filled the room until it boiled over. You don’t know who made the first move, but suddenly you were in Steve’s lap exchanging kisses. Steve must’ve had some practice since 1945, because the things his mouth was doing to yours made you wonder if he could do the same thing to your lower lips.

Abruptly, Steve pulled away to stop kissing you. “Damn, I forgot to ask. Are you okay with this?” Wow, only Steve Rogers would stop making out just to ensure he had consent. At that moment you knew Steve would own your heart sooner rather than later.

In response, you assaulted Steve with your lips and he gave a growl of approval. He flipped the two of you so you were laying on the couch while he was on top. Both of you were exploring the other’s body, getting dangerously close to start undressing the other.

Your hands were reaching for Steve’s belt buckle when your phone started ringing. Steve tried to get you to answer it, but you were too wrapped up in the idea of seeing what Steve was packing under his jeans.

“Doll, I really think you should answer it,” Steve suggested as the caller called for the second time.

Angrily you reached for the phone and answered, “Hello.”

“Umm, Ms. Y/L/N this is Nia.” Quickly your attitude was gone and you were on high alert. You gave some of your students your phone number, because you knew they had some troubles at home and you told them to not to hesitate to call you if they were in danger or trouble. If Nia was calling she was in some serious trouble, because she always had this jokester/tough girl exterior thing going on.

“Nia, what’s going on sweetie?” Steve was automatically on alert as he heard you say your student’s name.

“Can you come by, please? My…my…my…my mmm-mom owes these guys money and they’re beating on her and I-II-III-I think they’re coming for me next.” The young girl stuttered through her tears.

You were already grabbing your things before Nia explained the whole situation. “I’m on my way. Just lock yourself up until I get there, okay.”

“I already did. Thank you, Ms. Y/L/N.”

As you gathered your things, you didn’t notice Steve was getting ready as well. “I gotta go. Nia’s in trouble.”

“No problem. I’m going with and I’m driving.” You didn’t have time to argue with Steve and you were grateful anyway, so you hopped on the back of his motorcycle.

Before you got to Nia’s apartment door you could hear the fight in the hallway and no one in the complex would go in help, but they sure did have time to stand in the hallway and listen. If you weren’t on a mission to save Nia, you would’ve cuss they asses out.

Finally, you and Steve approached the door with his shield on his arm and your sai in your hands. Giving each other a nod, Steve finally kicked down the door.

The two of you were greeted to the sight of two men, who looked like they belonged on someone’s defensive line beating on Nia’s mom, who was clearly a drug addict. Then another figure caught your eye. It was another man and he was trying to kick down the door that most likely held Nia behind it.

The two guys hitting on Nia’s mom made eye contact with the two of you and made one of the smartest decisions they made that night. They ran.

“I’ll handle that one and you go get those two,” you ordered Steve as you nodded your head in the direction of the door.

“Be safe!” Steve yelled as he ran out the door.

The other asshat finally stopped pounding on the door and looked you up and down with a mix of lust and mirth. “What? Are you the new diversity hire for the Avengers?”

“Ha ha ha. You’re a real comedian. Why are you beating on my student’s mom and trying to burst into her room?”

All of the laughter left his face and it was replaced by a mask of anger. “Because that druggie bitch,” he pointed his gun at Nia’s mom. “Owes my boss money and she refused to pay up so I thought a little fun time with that little ho she calls a daughter could be a down payment.”

Disgusted at the man’s sick plans for Nia, you rolled your eyes. “You thought wrong.”

“Oh, what you gone do about it?” Ole dude pointed the gun in your direction.

You let out a desperate sigh and rolled your shoulders. “Listen, you and your crew ruined my date so I’m already pissed. So, are you sure you wanna do this?”

He looked you up and down in contempt. “Am I supposed to be scared of you, teach?” That’s all the answer you needed. Next thing you did was throw one of your sai’s into the man’s gun and sent a flying kick to his chest, effectively knocking him out.

After you cuffed him to the dining table, you knocked on Nia’s door. “Hey, Nia, sweetie. It’s Ms. Y/L/N. You can come out now.”

Tentatively Nia opened the door, but once she saw you she bum-rushed you. You stroked the young girl between her puff balls as you held her while she cried.

“Thank you, Ms. Y/L/N,” Nia confessed between sobs.

“No problem, sweetie. Are you ok?”

Nia pulled away from slightly to look up at you. “Yeah, I’m good. Sorry I ruined your date with Captain America.”

You grabbed the young girl by the shoulders and knelt down until you were eye level with her. “No, I’m happy you called. It means that you’re safe now.”

After calming Nia down, you checked on her mother and gave her a gentle but stern warning about using drugs. It seemed that the woman took it to heart, but God only knows.

Once you were sure that they were okay, you took the intruder to meet with Steve outside. He currently had the other two guys knocked out as well.

Steve pointed at the guy you were dragging. “You know you could’ve called me to get him.”

You shrugged your shoulders and gave a look of indifference. “Eh, I liked that he kept bumping his head on the stairs. And besides I need the arm workout.”

All three men were unconscious and you needed them awake. With no water on hand you had to kick them to jolt them awake, but it’s not like you felt bad about it.

A chorus of ‘what the fuck’ pierced the air as they awoke.

“Okay, this is how it’s gonna go. All three of you are now my bitches and work for me now and gonna be my informants. I need you to tell me about any information you have on Terrence and any business dealings he has with a Ghost. And if you don’t wanna comply or I feel that you’re jerking my chain, I’ll throw your ass at a SHIELD black site like that,” you threatened with a snap of your finger.

The douchebags were pissed off and wanted to say something, but one look at your face and they knew you weren’t playing. You had those Fury genes to thank for that.

Each grumpily agreed to your terms of conditions. Before they left you did threaten to cut off their balls if they attacked Nia and her mother or any other woman like that again.

—

When the two of you returned, you immediately apologized to Steve. “I’m sorry, I ruined your night. I’m sure you get tired of fighting and that’s exactly what you did on your night off.”

Steve reached out to you and placed a kiss on the back of your hands. “You didn’t ruin anything. Tonight was perfect and I like that you’ll drop anything for your students to help them out.”

“Thanks, everything was really great tonight. I hope we can do it again, but I should go. I have an early morning tomorrow.”

As you reached for the doorknob, Steve pulled you back and ask about turning the guys into informants. You informed Steve of you officially becoming a SHIELD agent to find Ghost through Terrence’s crew.

“I mean it’s only if you’re comfortable,” Steve scratched the back of his neck as a nervous tick. “But since it’s late and my place is closer to the tower, you could stay here for the night. But that’s only if you want to,” Steve hurriedly added on the last part.

Steve’s place was closer and he was harmless, you thought to yourself. “If you don’t mind, I would love to stay.”

The soldier was elated you decided to stay. He tried to give you his guest room, but you preferred to sleep in his bed with him.

Thankfully, you always had a go bag, so all you needed from Steve was something to sleep in.

When you emerged from the bathroom, Steve automatically grabbed a pillow to cover his hard on. He didn’t think he would have such a strong reaction to you wearing his shirt. Right at that moment he vowed that every chance he had, he would try to get you into one of his shirts.

“What are you staring at, pretty boy,” you teased, knowing full well Steve was staring at your curves.

Climbing into the bed and straddling his lap, you felt Steve’s erection. Deciding to be a tease, you rolled your hips around, which elicited a sinful moan from Steve’s mouth.

Promptly, Steve plopped you on the other side of the bed.

“What the hell, Steve? What’s that for?”

Suddenly, there was a shift in the air. Gone was the sweet and nervous Steve, but there was the confident and dominant Steve.

He gripped your chin and pulled your face closer to his.

“When I fuck you, you won’t be able to properly function for the next couple of days. And I doubt you want to accidentally call me daddy in front of your dad tomorrow, but if you do, then by all means let’s get to it.”

Steve was motioning to take off his shirt when you let out a meek, “I’m good.” You wanted nothing more than to be underneath Steve writhing in pleasure, but the way he may it sound you would be silly putty in the end and you didn’t need that your first day at SHIELD.

The blonde pulled his shirt back down and smirked at you. He kissed the side of your head and told you good night before he wrapped his arm around your waist.

Now you had to go to sleep hoping there wouldn’t be a wet puddle on the bed from your dreams of Steve screwing you silly.

Tags: @jojolu @ladyamandapanda12 @kashirenae92 @areubeingserved @dumbchick @wakanda-inspired @blacknthemix @pastelastronomy24 @chaneajoyyy @chonisberonica @everything-is-awesomesauce @blackreaders-assemble @nickidub718 @valkyriesnymph @marvelmaree @lildashofmelanin @cyrioussoul @destinio1 @toniilaney @euphoric05 @yoyolovesbucky @the-undecided-compass

#black!reader #steve rogers #steve x reader #steve x black!reader #captain america #captain america x reader #captain america x black!reader #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x black!reader #mcufam #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #mcu

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suffering-and-happy-about-it · 5 years

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Favored Ones, Part 5. (Joel Miller x Fem!reader)

Description: When you spend every evening with someone who’s deeply under your skin, a certain relationship can be developed. So it’s crushing for Joel when Y/N suddenly disappears. But there’s way more to the relationship that one would’ve guessed.

A/N: Inspired by Ecstasy by Crooked Still (Bitches who saw TLoU Part II. E3 trailer know what’s uppp).

Warning: ANGST bcs knife dad Joel Miller is full of anger and he needs a fucking break. I swear.

Tagging: @jodiereedus22 @nemodoren @xxgoldenhour @missdictatorme

Word count: 2.9 K

If you like this story, please, more parts can be found here! :): H E R E

One day prior events of the hunt, 2038:

And so your plan was born. The great plan, as Ellie called it. Ellie was about to tell Dina and she was extremely nervous.

You were pretty calm thanks to your impulsive behavior - you finally calmed down during those last two weeks and prepared for confronting the old man with the intel Ellie gave you.

Joel already knew that your hunting lessons are far gone by that moment. He was a bit sad about that - though he hated to say it, he missed those evenings. He was missing those moments when you two walked in the woods and talked, sometimes you shut up in one second and the other one you both were in a hunting mood, trying to show the other one who's wearing pants and who's capable of hunting down more animals.

He usually won. But when thought about it... He liked your competitions. Joel tried to tell himself that there's no place for having any melancholy at those times. But he saw you a few times here and there in the city while you were walking around with that fisherman's son.

So was he right in the end? You truly were into that boy. And as far as Joel could tell, he was in love with so much it almost hurt his eyes. That kiddo was obsessed with your every move.

But it made him think - you had enough time to be with that kiddo, but you didn't have enough time to improve your hunting skills, which made him furrow. Joel decided that he needs to investigate that situation. And what could have been better than talking to Ellie? So he joined her on her walk through the small town.

"Well, nice to see you after a long time, old man. Will you come to today's meeting about that city exploration we're planning next week?" - Ellie smiled at him and took some sweet potatoes you, she and Dina planned to grill on hot coal. The next thing she needed was some onion and chicken meat. You definitely were the best cook.

"I think I need to. I haven't been to one since October. I had too much work with those kiddos. You and your friends are scheduled?" - Joel tried to ask innocently. He was walking alongside Ellie throughout the whole market.

"Yeah. But Dina and Y/N probably won't make it to the meeting at all. Jesse will be there as always. Why? Do you need something specific?" - Ellie stopped and her smooth lips parted. She was thinking about Joel's motivation behind his questioning. It was almost six months ago since she and Joel had a proper conversation just like that.

"They won't?" - Joel rose his eyebrows and mist slowly came out of his lips. - "How so? Dina doesn't have time and Y/N is ill, or what?"

"No. They're going on the dance night. Dina is after a breakup and Y/N is going there with Philip." - Ellie turned back to the seller and pointed her finger on the best looking chicken breasts. - "But why would you care, big guy? These girls aren't your responsibility."

"Yeah. But I kinda noticed that Y/N is really good at letting her responsibilities be just as they are in the last two weeks." - Joel took the chicken meat and gave it to Ellie so the marketer would not interrupt their conversation.

"Is she? I haven’t noticed at all." - Ellie was playing on really thin ice, but she was smiling and she knew it really well, because she finally figured out what Joel is after. You and your time management. That would not be anything bad - if he cared about the others as well. She looked at him with her eyes partially closed, but didn't say anything.

"I did. She isn't coming on our training, didn't talk to me for the last two weeks, she doesn't go to the forest anymore and she isn't on most of the meetings." - Joel put his forearms crossed in front of his chest, furrowing at Ellie. - "Is it the kiddo from the lake? She's rather irresponsible these days. If she doesn't stop, it will have bad consequences."

"Philip?" - Ellie stopped again and looked Joel in the eyes. - "Also, why you're so concerned about her? She told me that she doesn't need your training anymore, she's capable of hunting on her own. Something happened between you two?" - Ellie furrowed her brows at Joel. So maybe he could be interested in some way - no, Ellie corrected herself. He was interested. He never thought about anyone's time schedule when they stopped training with Joel. Joel just didn't care enough to ask.

It maybe wasn't exactly the flame of endless affection, but he was thinking about you. That was a good sign.

"Does something need to happen for me to be curious?" - Joel looked far away from Ellie because he started to feel uncomfortable. Joel wasn't aware that Ellie knew about your crush on him; nor did he knew that you had told her. Yet he was feeling uncomfortable. - "I'm just worried about her future. That's all."

"Riiiight. About her future. Ok. But she's not in any bad hands. Don't be worried." - Ellie patted his shoulder. So that was probably all that he will get out of Ellie. - "But on another note, will you come tonight on the dance? I would like to have a round or two with you. Just like old times, huh?"

"You know that those things aren't exactly mine area, do you?" - Joel chuckled in his low, singing voice. He scratched his forehead nervously.

"You can ask Y/N yourself, don't you think? I can't speak for her." - Ellie raised her eyebrows in his direction. Joel looked at her as if she was about to go fucking crazy. - "About the hunting sessions, I mean."

When the big dance came by, you went with there with Philip by your side. Dina came along as well, not even thinking about going on the meeting to stand Jesse's ass one more minute. They had broken up again, so everything was going a-ok for that shy lesbian.

Ellie went to the meeting with Joel and Jesse - and she promised you that she'll try to talk Joel down. Nothing was for sure.

But you knew one thing - you and Dina started your evening with glasses of whiskey down and its bottoms up. You poured down at least three of them, so you would be able to let Philip's hands roam around your body. It did nothing to you, yet you needed to let him be during the dance. You were suffering every time he tried to touch you.

Slowly, the band members, with whom you've been drinking until that moment, sat behind their instruments and started playing as the hall started to get fuller - with people of all ages, like children, youngsters, and adults.

You gently dodged all of Philip's tries to make you dance with him. You sighed with relief when Ellie slowly entered the room with he faced red from nerves and winter outside. Oh, yeah - it was her big evening. Telling Dina. You were excited.

You waved at her as you danced with a small boy named Louis. She waved back at you and took a glass of bourbon as well. She was excited about that. Then you left Louis there to catch up with the young ladies in the hood to go for Ellie.

"Hi, baby." - She hugged you tightly and gave you a second glass of alcohol. - "I hope that I'll survive this night. God may help me. What about Philip?" - She asked and gulped a bit.

"We're playing dodge all the time. I just don't like that boy, I'm sorry. I'm waiting for the big game to come around." - You giggled into the glass. Oh fuck, you were tipsy as hell.

"There he is." - Ellie pointed her finger at the other side of the hall. Seriously Joel stood there nervously, with hands over his chest, looking around him. - "Here, take this to him and see how it goes." - She gave you her glass of alcohol and smacked your ass playfully. You screamed a bit with a happy tone. Ellie showed you crossed fingers and one corner of her lips slowly crept into a smile.

So you approached Joel with your tipsy walk and lazy smile, rising your eyebrows. You gave him one glass and then smoothed your hair. The shirt you had on made your boobs irresistible. Every man must've looked at them at least once. Those old jeans were making your bum rounder... No wonder that Philip was into you so much.

"Look who we got here." - You gulped down the while glass and giggled, putting the glass on the table next to his hip. - "Really nice to see you here big guy, enjoying the life, having fun in the evening."

"Ellie wished me to come. Here she's with Dina." - He pointed at them and you just turned around to see them kissing. Good girl. Now, it was your time to hit the big jackpot. - "Oh wow."

"Do you want to dance as well?" - You blurted out so Joel didn't have to ask you absolutely anything. He just couldn't as he froze down. - "I mean... Ellie told me you wanted to ask me about something. A slow song is playing now, we have the time. What do you say?" - You asked innocently and played with the thought of taking his fingers into your palm, but you didn't do it.

"Youngblood..." - Joel sighed and drank the glass to the bottom.

"Just one dance. Come on. Won't hurt you, old man." - Joel looked at the people around you and then sighed again. He wasn't happy at all with you. But how could he resist?

You took a very similar hold on him as Dina did with Ellie; your hands circled behind his neck, your body so close to him that he felt how warm your body was. He put his hands on the small of your back and tried to look as annoyed as he could.

The trust was that Joel hadn't danced in the whole eternity. He was enjoying himself a lot at the moment, to be honest. Slow moves, gentle and romantic music, relaxed atmosphere, beautiful girl... No. He stopped himself with the melancholy. No space for that bullshit.

"So you stopped our sessions, you stopped the meetings, anything that I've missed? Or that's all?" - He asked quietly, his thumbs playing with a small part of your shirt.

"Oh, you missed my relationship with the nicest boy around." - You said sweetly and watched his jaw covered in a beard. Oh, how you missed that view. But now, you were too sensitive on the rhythm of his breath and on how warm he was even through the clothes. His chuckle resonated deep within you.

"Hard to be missed, youngblood. It's nice to see you happy." - He made you turn slowly before one of his hands caught yours and the second ended on your hip.

"I can be even happier. You know that?" - Your fingers gripped his shoulder tightly and for a moment, you pressed his body into his. And with that, he left you alone. He just stepped aside and you felt as your heart sank again. No. You slowly rose your head. Not this fucking time. This time, you were ready.

"And I don't do these things. You know that?" - Joel turned around with angry mumbling. - "So that's why Ellie made come here... Jesus Christ." - And with that, every of his one hundred and eighty centimeters disappeared into the white darkness outside.

"What the fuck is your fucking problem?!" - You ran after him, looking at him while the snow started to cover your hair and face. Your cheeks instantly reddened as you looked at him. He turned to you with the same affection as you yelled at him. Oh, this argument was about to be one of the best of your lives.

"What the fuck is my problem?" - Joel came closer to you, almost pushing you further away with his hands, but he stopped himself at the right moment. - “The question is what is your problem?”

“My problem is named Tess and your grief over her.” - You told slowly and then you stood up straightly. Joel just closed his eyes and turned away from you. Yeah, Ellie spoke to you about a woman who she knew for a very short amount of time. As she spoke about Tess five years apart, she figured out that there maybe was something more. So that was the spot you should attack if Joel gives you a chance. Just as she attacked Sarah’s little spot in Joel’s heart.

“Stop living in the past, Joel.” - You said loudly again, while Joel looked like he’s about to murder you. Nobody else knew about what happened to Tess, except Tommy, nor anybody knew that she did even exist.

Joel attacked every time someone attacked his own past. Then it was his time to be offensive.

“Like somebody who is still a kid, who basically never went outside the city’s boundaries and who has everything they need around them could ever tell me what living in the past is.” - He walked to you, his nostrils were getting bigger as he started to breathe louder. - “So I warn you to let all of this be and walk back, take that kiddo for a round or two and forget that we ever had this conversation.”

“Or what if you fucking tell me, that you want to have... Something with me? How does that sound?” - You came closer to him, still not touching him.

The snowy and cold air was slowly getting sultry. You needed to open up his eyes - Ellie told you everything she noticed while Joel caught up with her on the market. You spoke with her about that and Ellie told you that there might be something more into it, but that Joel is a much more complicated person to say for sure to say it. That he likes you.

“Just face it, Jesus fucking Christ, it is not that hard. You were curious about me stoping to come to our training, you asked about me and Philip even if you didn't have to care at all and you tried to get some intel from Ellie.” - You rolled your eyes and chills formed on your body. You two stood in a total snowy and ice-cold night. Fucking weather. - “And if you told me that you only care about my future, then you can shove this bullshit up your ass because I don't fucking care. Because you and me? We have something. We have a connection.”

So you brought up Tess, which hurt him - but Ellie was your source of information. He couldn't be angry with his baby girl because she told you after the two of them spoke at the market. She had to. She was trying to help the situation.

He wasn't sure, but something gave Joel the feeling that Ellie knows him way better he knows himself.

For a moment, Joel closed his eyes before looking at you once again without any of his normally forbidden feelings. You were a young, truly gorgeous woman. You were bright and capable of noticing small details even if you cursed like a sailor.

He wasn't doing any type of romantic relationship since the moment Tess has died. He wasn't exactly in love with her, but she was his girl for a long night. But you were absolutely right - there was no need for living in the past. And Joel was scared of it when the past was creeping up upon him almost every time he went to sleep.

And yet, there you stood, offering him a helping hand to let all of it go. You were offering him to bring him back to reality. And as you said, maybe the elders, like your very own parents, won't be too happy about that. Maybe young people will look at you differently. But you had courage which Joel was mesmerized with. You wanted to try.

To try leaving the past, both yours and his, behind you to focus on the future. And that was one of the bravest things he saw until that day.

In his own way, he missed your sense of humor, your cursing and your gentle fingers holding your bow just as he misses the way you smelled and smiled at him.

He wanted to try as well.

"You're right." - Joel said slowly and almost coldly, which made your heart sank with fear once again. - "I think that maybe we have something together."

"So is that a yes?" - You whispered and shook with coldness once again. Jesus, you needed to get on a warm place or a glass of whiskey. Maybe both.

"I think that it is a yes."

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x y/n #joel x reader #joel miller imagine #the last of us #tlou #ellie williams #ellie and joel tlou #ellie tlou #joel tlou #ellie the last of us #joel the last of us #naughty dog #naughty dog games

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meangirlsx · 5 years

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The End You Meant for Me (Part 2)

Pairing: Lydia Deetz x reader Word count: 2758 Warning(s): None Request: “Okay so like Lydia and her girlfriend spending a second christmas together and reader gets everyone in the house a gift, even beetlejuice! Lydia sees this as a huge step in their relationship because she sees how much her girlfriend has changed in a year considering she was very nervous, felt bad only getting Lydia a gift. To how shes more open and friendly with Charles and Delia, how she pokes fun at Beetlejuice, and how close she is to Adam and Barbara. Lyds is just head over heels in love.” and “Would you mind doing a Lydia x Reader (or Cady x Reader if you still write for Mean Girls) during the holidays? Christmas perhaps?” Note: MAJOR thank you shoutout to @sophiascaruso for coming up with literally all of the gifts the reader gives (including input on the gifts to Lydia) and talking through thoughts with me as I wrote this. She is magical and very possibly a modern-day muse in disguise.

And a special thank you to @spooky-scary-lesbian for sending a request that prompted my brain to produce way too many words that I’m way too excited about. Very excited to share the words with you all.

Part 1 Part 3

——

It felt like forever for Christmas to come, and somehow like no time had passed, too. But finally, it was here.

You got up so you had enough time to run out before meeting Lydia. You wanted to visit Emily.

Lydia had told you she was going in the morning, and you thought about asking to join her, but you thought it might be nice for her to have the time just between her and her mom. She had also told you that she had to finish wrapping presents between visiting her mom and coming over to your place, which gave you a good idea of when Lydia would be back at her apartment.

So you bundled up and headed out.

You weren’t the only one at the cemetery, which didn’t really surprise you. A lot of people probably wanted to visit loved ones on Christmas.

It felt strange walking up to Emily’s grave alone. You’d only ever gone with Lydia before.

You saw two bouquets of flowers lying there. One was from Lydia, you knew. The other was probably from Charles.

“Merry Christmas, Emily,” you said. “I brought you something. It’s not flowers, but…”

You pulled out two ticket stubs from a horror movie you and Lydia had seen around Halloween.

“It’s not quite the same as your haunted houses in summer, but I’m doing my best…” You placed the ticket stubs against her headstone. “I always do my best to take care of her. Look out for her. Celebrate Halloween to the fullest extent. In your honor.”

You took another breath to calm your nerves. You knew you had no reason to be nervous, but that didn’t stop you from feeling it.

“Charles gave me your locket to give to her. He probably told you that. It means everything to me. She means everything to me. It’s an honor to be part of such a special family tradition. I’m going to give it to her tonight.”

You took a moment and breathed in the cold air.

“I’m also going to propose to her tonight. Charles probably told you that, too. But I wanted you to hear it from me. And you know? I’m nervous. We’ve talked about it before, of course. It’s not like I’ll be springing the idea on her. I know she wants to get married. I kind of still can’t believe it when I think about it. I’m just so in awe of her. Every day.”

Your mind drifted to all the stories Lydia and Charles had told you about Emily over the years. The things Lydia said she learned from her mom. The ways Charles told you Lydia was like her.

“And it sounds like there’s so much of you in her. I can’t imagine how proud you must be of her.”

You sighed and watched your breath turn to fog.

“I know you’ll be with us tonight. I won’t really see you then, but… Thank you for welcoming me into your family.”

You had nothing else to say, but you weren’t quite ready to walk away, so you stood there for another minute before heading home.

Back at your apartment, you finished getting ready and cleaned up some until Lydia arrived. She helped you bring the cookies you’d made together and your presents for her family out and pack them in the car with hers.

“I’m so excited to be with your family for Christmas again,” you told Lydia as you rearranged some presents in the trunk. “It was so nice of them to invite me last year when I didn’t know them that well. I know I didn’t know them well enough to, but I still feel bad I didn’t have presents for them. I’m so ready to change that this year.”

When she didn’t respond, you picked up your head to see that she had stopped packing the backseat and instead started staring at you.

“What?” you asked.

She glanced at the presents piled up in the backseat, then back at you. “It’s just such a change from last year. You were so nervous. And you won everyone over right away. Not that I expected them to react any differently.” She smiled at you. “I knew they’d love you as much as I do. But you’re so close to them, now. My dad asks about you all the time. I’m still convinced Delia thinks you’re secretly a god. I’m pretty sure Barbara and Adam would adopt you if they got the chance. BJ always asks where you are when I visit on my own. Even Big Sandy gets excited when you come over with me.”

You smiled at her.

“I’m just really happy. And that catches me a little off-guard sometimes. My fifteen-year-old self would hardly believe this is where she would end up.”

You couldn’t help but think about how far she had come, too. You knew her fifteen-year-old self wouldn’t have been comfortable saying all of that, either.

“Well, I’m glad you’re happy.” You crossed to her and took her hand. “I’m happy, too.”

She gave you a quick kiss, then climbed into the driver’s seat.

When you arrived, the greetings were the same as at Thanksgiving. And as two weeks ago when you and Lydia had come over again.

Charles, however, seemed especially happy to see you. Truth be told, you felt the same way.

Beetlejuice had already started updating Lydia on an adventure he’d had since the last time he saw her, so Charles hugged you and whispered, “Are you still…?”

“I am. After presents. If I can get her away for a minute.”

He placed his hands firmly on your arms and gave a squeeze.

“The house looks beautiful,” you said, looking around at all the directions.

“Thank you. It has a little bit of everyone in it.”

He was right. There were some classic decorations, which you figured were his. Some were sparkly and more eccentric, which screamed Delia. Some were cutesy and dorky in the best way that could only be Barbara and Adam’s doing. A handful of decorations had a very specific color scheme of green and purple, from Beetlejuice, you figured. And some looked almost more like Halloween decorations.

Charles noticed your confusion and laughed.

“Lydia insisted we get them our first Christmas in the house. We haven’t put them up since she went to college, but she found them again this year and we had to put them up.”

“I love them. None of it really goes together, and somehow they blend perfectly.”

It wasn’t long before you all ended up in the kitchen to help cook. Beetlejuice didn’t touch any food, which was probably for the best, you thought. He proudly proclaimed that he would be moral support instead.

Barbara and Adam truly seemed in their element, rattling off recipes and sharing tips. They seemed thrilled. Really, everyone did.

Everything with the family was an adventure, even cooking and eating, and you kind of loved that.

After dinner and cleaning up, you all gathered in the living room. Charles and Delia made themselves comfortable on the couch. Barbara and Adam pulled up chairs from the table even though they didn’t really need them. Beetlejuice happily hovered between the two couples. There was still room on the couch, but you and Lydia sat on the floor by the fire.

You loved seeing everyone’s reactions as they opened their gifts from each other. You especially loved being part of it this year.

For Beetlejuice, you had gotten a pair of Crocs with one in purple and one in green, a shirt with the phrase “Give me a BJ,” and bugs, which had prompted a handful of questions from the saleswoman at the pet store about what kind of reptile you had. He reacted with a gasp, a hand over his chest, and a “You get me.”

For Adam, you had gotten a couple pairs of jean shorts and a couple pairs of white socks. You thought he was going to scream, he looked so excited. “I think I just leveled up in Dad! Oh, I can wear these with my Birkenstocks!”

“I thought you were kidding when you said you got him jorts,” Lydia said softly to you.

You just laughed.

For Barbara, you had gotten an assortment of seeds for her garden, gardening gloves for sentimental reasons even though she didn’t really need them, and a sun dress. She gave you the biggest hug. “I can’t wait to see how these little babies grow!” she said. “And this dress is gorgeous. I’m going to wear it tomorrow. Thank you.”

For Delia, you got a pair of sunglasses and a faux fur coat she’d tried on when you went shopping together but told herself she didn’t need. Unlike Adam, she did scream. “Oh! You remembered! I’m so glad because I’ve been thinking about them and I really do need these.” She immediately put them on, chucked her phone at you, and struck a pose. “Will you take my picture? Do I look like a celebrity?” You took a long string of photos as she moved through pose after pose. Everyone assured her she did look like a celebrity. And she really did.

For Charles, you got a tie, a bottle of whiskey, and a pair of tickets to the opera for him and Delia. Of course his reaction was more subdued than the rest of the family’s, but it was just as sincere. “I can wear this tie to my business dinner next week. I was going to get a new one for it. And this is my favorite whiskey, but it’s hard to come by. How on Earth did you find it?”

Delia grabbed his arm. “I can wear my new coat to the opera!”

“I actually also got something for Big Sandy,” you said.

Beetlejuice looked touched, and so did Lydia.

You picked up her gift and headed outside. You didn’t intend on it, but everyone stood in the doorway to watch.

Big Sandy approached you as soon as you stepped out of the house.

“Hey, girl,” you said with a smile. “Merry Christmas.”

She ripped the package with her teeth to reveal a hat and scarf. She let out a sound that sounded like a mix between a shriek and a chirp.

“I’m glad you like it,” you said with a laugh.

You helped her put them on, and she nuzzled into you.

Now the last gifts to be exchanged were between you and Lydia. You hadn’t planned it that way, but the way the adults had sort of steered the gifts up until then, you realized they had planned it.

“I want to go first,” Lydia said. “I’m really excited about your gift. But also a little nervous.”

That confused you. “I’d love anything you got me. It’s from you.”

She smiled and handed you the gift. It was a small box, nicely wrapped and even complete with a bow.

You placed the bow off to the side and unwrapped and opened the box carefully.

“A key?” you asked, looking back up at her.

“We’ve been talking about finding an apartment together, and I didn’t want to do it without you, but I came across one that was perfect. It has everything we’ve been talking about. And it’s even close to here… So I got it.”

“You got us an apartment?” you asked, almost in disbelief.

“I did.” She did look nervous, and now you understood. She was worried you might be upset that she had chosen a place without you.

You threw your arms around her. “You got us an apartment! Oh my God.”

Her arms wrapped around you in turn. “Also…”

“Also?” You pulled back just enough to look her in the eyes again.

“The building accepts cats. So I called the shelter, and they said the black cat we saw last week is still there, so if you want to get her…”

“Yes!” You hugged her again. “I absolutely want to get her.”

You felt Lydia tighten her grip on you.

“A cat,” you said. “In our own apartment.”

Lydia laughed, and you finally let go.

The moment had felt as if you and Lydia were alone, but you were suddenly very aware of the fact that you were not. You looked out at the rest of the room. Beetlejuice had his arms crossed like he was at ease, but he was smiling and shaking his head as if he were saying, “Took you long enough.” Barbara’s hands were clasped together in front of her chest. Adam had his hand on her knee, grinning. Delia’s hands were pressed together against her mouth. And Charles’s entire face was just lit up. He looked proud and happy and impressed all at the same time.

You turned back to Lydia. “Thank you. I can’t wait to see the apartment.” You smiled again. “I can’t wait to live there.”

“I have pictures on my phone,” she said. “Do you want to see?”

“Of course!”

“Me, too!” Delia said.

“You guys haven’t seen?” you asked.

“Oh, no, we have. I just want to see them again.”

You and Lydia laughed, and everyone gathered behind the two of you to watch as Lydia swiped through the photos.

It really did look perfect. It was beautiful. It had all the features you were hoping for. And you did love that it was close to her family.

“It looks amazing, Lyds,” you said.

She smiled at you, then tapped on her phone quickly to text the pictures to you.

“Okay,” you said. You picked up your gift and handed it to her.

“Also a small box,” she said. “Don’t tell me you got us an apartment, too.” She laughed, and it almost sounded nervous, but she continued to unwrap your gift.

When she removed the lid from the box, she froze. Her eyes went wide. The entire room felt like it went still.

“Isn’t this…?” her voice trailed off.

“Yes,” Charles said.

She turned to look at him. “I thought it got lost in the move?”

“It did. At least, I thought it did. But I found it just before Thanksgiving.”

“And you gave it to Y/N.” She faced you again. She looked like she had more to say, but instead, she threw herself at you with such strong force that you had to stabilize yourself with one arm. The second you knew you were stable enough to keep both of you upright, you were holding her tightly with absolutely no intention of letting go until she did.

After what seemed like maybe a full minute, you parted.

She looked at the locket again. “I wish my mom had gotten the chance to meet you. She would’ve loved you.”

“I’m sure I would’ve loved her.”

“She would have been delighted to see the two of you together,” Charles said.

Lydia glanced up and around the room. “She is. She might not be with us, but she’s watching. I have no doubt.” She paused, then added, “It’s Christmas.”

Charles gave her a gentle smile. “You’re absolutely right. And I believe she’s thrilled to know Y/N is the one to help carry on the tradition.”

Lydia reached out to run her thumb across the back of your hand. “Me, too.” Then she tugged on your hand and stood up. “I want to go put it on and see how it looks.”

You knew the tug meant she wanted you to go with her. That would be time alone with her you didn’t have to manufacture yourself. It was a little sooner than you’d expected, but all the presents had been opened, and you were about ready to start thinking of reasons to ask her to show you her old room or sit on the back porch with you even though you were there to spend the holiday with her family.

You could feel everyone’s eyes on you as Lydia made her way to the staircase. You knew they were all thinking the exact same thing as you.

If she had just wanted to see the necklace in a mirror, she could’ve gone to the bathroom on the main floor, you realized. But she was heading upstairs to her old room, and she wanted you to go with her. She didn’t know you were going to propose, but she was creating a moment for the two of you just the same.

So you grabbed your purse and followed Lydia up the stairs.

——

Part 3 (linked at the top, too, but also here for convenience)

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kiegosbby · 4 years

Text

all good stories have a happy ending.

here’s the happy ending you fluff whores.

angst version here.

warnings: breakup, drinking, crying, cutting, implying suicide.

*unedited*

✁- - - - - - r- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

you jumped up from your seat and went to meet him at the door. he opened the door, dragging a suitcase in and he had a tired look on his face. he looked up at you and you quickly saw his facade change from tired to sadness, quickly back to tiredness, this time adding a little annoyance in it. He let out a annoyed huff

you went to give him a hug, a little confused from what had just happened, and even more confused when he pulled away from your hug.

“Is everything ok keigo?” you were a little hurt youd admit it. after all these months and all you got was a huff? anger started to stir in you as you waited for his response.

“why are you still here? Didn’t you get the hint when I didn’t reply to you at all?” he crossed his arms in front of him, giving you the most annoyed look he could muster.

you looked at him with confusion, rage, and disbelief. how could he say all this? after everything you’ve done for him. how much you helped him. you couldn’t believe this

“keigo this isn’t funny. I’ve waited for you for months and did so much for you! you can’t be serious?” your voice betrayed you and squeaked slightly at the end.

you walked up to him and looked down at your feet.

“I hope your making the right choice hawks. I was the only one that was ever there for you. and now you’ve lost that to.”

you turned to walk away, before turning your head over your shoulder quickly.

“burn in hell”

you thought you heard a sniffle, but stormed away before thinking twice.

you went to give him a hug, a little confused from what had just happened, and even more confused when he pulled away from your hug.

“Is everything ok keigo?” you were a little hurt youd admit it. after all these months and all you got was a huff? anger started to stir in you as you waited for his response.

“why are you still here? Didn’t you get the hint when I didn’t reply to you at all?” he crossed his arms in front of him, giving you the most annoyed look he could muster.

you looked at him with confusion, rage, and disbelief. how could he say all this? after everything you’ve done for him. how much you helped him. you couldn’t believe this

“keigo this isn’t funny. I’ve waited for you for months and did so much for you! you can’t be serious?” your voice betrayed you and squeaked slightly at the end.

you walked up to him and looked down at your feet.

“I hope your making the right choice hawks. I was the only one that was ever there for you. and now you’ve lost that to.”

you turned to walk away, before turning your head over your shoulder quickly.

“burn in hell”

you thought you heard a sniffle, but stormed away before thinking twice.

you walked in with puffy eyes looking around.

Eyes landing on the alcohol isle, and walking towards it. you strolled down the isle and picked a bottle of whisky out. keigo always loved whiskey so you grew accustomed to it. you quickly checked out and started wandering around town again, downing the whisky in chugs.

you ended sitting on a worker catwalk on a bridge, having a view over the city. you looked through your bag for a jacket. even though you loved the coldness, you wanted to be warm. Warm again.

maybe your mind was clouded from the whisky, but you pulled your sleeves up, giving the wind access to your skin.

you grabbed the feather and put it up to your face, giving it a kiss.

you put the feather down and grabbed the knife again. funny how good things can turn badly so quickly.

this morning you were bursting with excitement and now here you were, sitting on top of a bridge, with a knife in your hand. how stupid could you be? you and him would never last.

you bring the knife down to your arm, dragging down your numb skin you only managed to make a small slit before a familiar red feather knocked it out of your hand.

you pulled your sleeve down quickly and turned to look where the feather came from.

“w-what are you doing here?” you tried to wipe your tears and looked over at him confused

when you looked over in his direction he looked distraught, he looked like he had been crying for hours, he was still crying, tears streaming down his face.

“please y/n I know what I said was bad but please don’t do this, we can talk about this, we can get back together you don’t have to do this” his voice was filled with fear, as he landed he went to put a hand on your shoulder, and you moved back, not wanting anything from him.

as you moved back his face filled with pain and hurt.

“hawks I have nothing to say to you. why are you even here? can you just let me do what I want? I waited months for you and all I get when you come back is to know that you didn’t want to be together anymore? how fucking cruel are you? Why didn’t you say anything to me? You made me look like a fool. you don’t want to be together so go. Leave!” you cried, and took steps back into the railing as he let silent tears fall.

“Y/n please you have to listen. I did that to protect you. My mission was really dangerous and I couldn’t protect you from that. I needed you to be gone so they couldn’t hurt you.. please understand. I don’t want you hurt. but with me you’ll only get hurt.” his voice was filled with pain and sorrow, as he let out his true feelings.

you felt all sorts of emotions run through you as you took in what he said. was he serious, or was he saying that so you wouldn’t do anything dumb?

“no your just saying that so I wouldn’t do anything dumb.” you looked away from him and cried. god you were so pathetic. thinking he would actually do that for you?

“No y/n I’m not! you have to believe me please. I don’t want you hurt because of me so I did it for you. just please let’s go home and talk more about this let me tell you exactly what happened.” it honestly sounded like he was begging at this point. it made you sad..

“fine but me only so you can tell me what happened.”

You looked into his eyes and relief washed over his face.

“yes thank you”

when you two got home, he had explained everything to you. and you had almost cried. he was risking his whole life for you. he lied to the people in his mission so you wouldn’t get hurt. your heart ached for him.

“I’m sorry for being bitchy” you felt terrible for what you did and said

“baby it’s ok, it’s my fault for not telling you”

that night, you two had fell asleep crying. But all that mattered was that you we’re together.

#bnha angst #bnha fanfiction #bnha hawks #hawks x reader #hawks x y/n #katsuki bakugo x reader #mha hawks #pro hero hawks #bnha imagines #hawks

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