#I’M SUCH A SIMP FOR HER ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY

[donna-medusa-gorgon]

Genuinely nobody:

Me at random hours of the day: Rosie~<3

[bbyjackie]

𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒 𝐊𝐈𝐃'𝐒 𝐆𝐅 — ♡

one piece social media + dating feat: kid

♡ liked by hey_its_heat, CAPTAIN.KIIIID and 2.9k others

_ynln: kid waiting patiently infront of the den den mushi

13 mins until the @/dominicfike album releases!!!

tagged: CAPTAIN.KIIIID

CAPTAIN.KIIIID: LETSS GOOOOO 🔥🔥

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: SUNBURN IS SUCH A BANGER

killerrr: no wonder it was so peaceful on the victoria punk

↳ _ynln: the only time kid isn't wrecking havoc, the fike effect!!

trafalgar_d.law: rare photo of eustass where his hair isn't radiating hairspray fumes (liked by p1rateking_luffy)

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: ITS ALL NATURAL

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: dont be mad that i actually take care of my hair

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: i can smell ur 10 in 1 from here

↳ p1rateking_luffy: HAHA Tra guy is write 😂😂

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: STFU YOU DONT EVEN SHOWER. YOURE A NATURAL HUMAN REPELLENT.

↳ trafalgar_d.law: omg strawhat please learn how to spell

↳ _ynln: PLEASE YOU GUYS ARE SO ANNOYING TAKE THIS TO THE DMS 😭

♡ liked by trafalgar_d.law, killerrr and 3.7k others

_ynln: kid refuses to share his lipsticks with me 😪😪

tagged: CAPTAIN.KIIIID

CAPTAIN.KIIIID: ew why would i want cooties from you

↳ _ynln: ive seen you eat pasta off the ground 😐

↳ hey_its_heat: puts you into perspective

↳ _ynln: WTF WHY AM I GETTING SHIT ON

CAPTAIN.KIIIID: YEAH CAUSE YOU LOSE THEM

↳ _ynln: IT WAS ONE TIME

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: I STILL WANT MY ROMAND#23 NUCADAMIA BACK

killerrr: simp 🥱🥱

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: how do i dislike a comment

lovenami: wtf why does he have a better collection than me

↳ _ynln: life is so unfair 😔💔

♡ liked by theroronoa.zoro, wirewirewire and 4.1k others

_ynln: i'll never shut up about this

thanks for the tickets loser <3

tagged: CAPTAIN.KIIIID, m.by__sana

CAPTAIN.KIIIID: thanks to yn im a certified once now

wirewirewire: YOU GUYS WENT TO TWICE WITHOUT US?!

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: imagine not being able to see the feels live 🥱🥱

↳ _ynln: kid wtf KFJWBHJDJ 😭😭

lovenami: HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO GET TICKETS I WAS STRUGGLING

↳ _ynln: IDK HAHA KID GOT THEM FOR ME

doflamingo_: I'll get you VIP tickets next time, hmu

↳ _ynln: im blocking u, you're practically a senior citizen

↳ trafalgar_d.law: wtf are u doing on her page?

↳ killerrr: when worlds collide.

↳ lovenami: yn take one for the team 🤞🤞

↳ heyl_its_heat: you’ll be remembered 🤕🤕☝️

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ARE YOU DOING ON MY GIRL'S ACCOUNT

↳ p1rateking_luffy: 😆

↳ theroronoa.zoro: this is actually funny asf

♡ liked by killerrr, lovenami and 4.8k others

_ynln: im thirdwheeling my own relationship ☝️

tagged: CAPTAIN.KIIIID, killerrr

hey_its_heat: being self aware >>>

wirewirewire: THIS IS CRAZY LFMAOO

lovenami: GIRL ITS NOT YOUR RELATIONSHIP ANYMORE 💀💀

killerrr: bffr i was the one third wheeling, if i have to see u guys kiss one more time i’m ending it 😐😐

↳ _ynln: 😭😭

CAPTAIN.KIIIID: you woke us up cause u were bored and wanted to gossip

↳ _ynln: okay and you weren’t complaining when i was telling you all the new world drama 🤨🤨

↳ killerrr: how do you even know about all of it 😭😭

↳ _ynln: nami, robin, chopper and me have the best gos talks <3

↳ nicorobin: so real (liked by lovenami, ilovecottoncandychopper)

CAPTAIN.KIIIID 2h

[CAPTAIN.KIIIID] _ynln replied to your story: omg why are u being cute, what did u do

[brazilsho]

Request idea: JD meets a feisty country fem troll and literally is like “WOW OK, 👀 tough lady” and immediately thinks he’s got the rizz to win her over but gets humbled so fast, so now he’s just this simp chasing a country girlboss

━ FEISTY LADY

summary; the request <3.

notes; NAH I love this idea smsm that I HAD to immediately do this BC WHAT?!?! I generously don’t know what I’m writing ;-; AND ITS SO SHORT IM SO SORRY :‘)

side note; I didn’t actually mentioned that you are a county troll, sorry ‼️ and it’s cringe asf :‘)

When John first met you, he immediately knew you weren’t one to play with.

You where someone that didn’t let herself be fooled around and knows what she’s doing if someone would try something.

John though, found your toughness and fearlessness attractive in his words and wanted to try actually MANY times to either flirt with you or even interact with you.

Well actually he never tried it, he only had many scenarios about how he could talk to you and get your interests into talking to him but eh.. no.

Each time John saw you around, he wants to speak to you but you where a feisty one and didn’t really let anyone know you well, unless your someone you like. (*cough*)

You knew though by the way John looks at you always, that he wanted to speak to you, but you knew that he wouldn’t do it which makes you chuckle always.

Just like today again, John just casually saw you being the lady you are and his mind immediately went to the thought of flirting with you to get your attention and somehow his ego was that high today that he really decided to do it.

The moment though when he was close to you and you took notice of his approach, he was a humbling mess.

Trying so desperately to get a word out of his mouth while you just looked confused as hell on what’s wrong with him, until..

"Hey sweet cheek, are you a toaster? Because you’re even to hot for it to handle"

Oh dear.. you should see his face the moment he said that.. cheeks practically crimson red and him mumbling on and on about that he didn’t mean it.

You though, thought it was funny seeing him like this and actually even if his rizz wasn’t the best, you chuckled a little as you moved closer to him just a little,

"Nice try, handsome"

That’s all you said, playfully placing his googles over his eyes and moved away, but turning your hove over to see him now on the floor, practically giggling and simping over the fact that you even acknowledged him..

© brazilsho ─ 2023. works i post are not allowed to be translated, stolen, copied, or reposted on other platforms.

[sunofpandora]

Authors note:

AYEEEE CHAPTER TWO

Wow! I was not expecting all the kind comments and the taglist requests from chapter 1. I’m genuinely in shock, still. The comments and reposts got me teary eyed. 

                                                                   V I R A G O            

Word count: 6k       

Chapter 2

The son sun made of stone  

words.

𝓭𝓮𝓽𝓪𝓲𝓵𝓼/𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼/𝓼𝔂𝓷𝓸𝓹𝓼𝓲𝓼/

‘Y/n was made of fire. Oh, a goddess girl with lips of lightning and a caged Phoenix under her skin. Neteyam is just the ashes and remains of the heavens she crushed under her heel.’

General Warnings: na’vi reader/ reader is a war orphan/ as always, spider, the reader, and Lo’ak are a trio/ Lo’ak and Reader being platonic soulmates?/ Spider and Reader being trauma twins/ Neteyam being lovesic/ Neteyam being nervous and shy around reader/ Neytiri being mother/ Jake being the husband i wish i had/ Tuk being a little sister and looking up to y/n/ Mentions of grace’s school./ reader fell first but Neteyam fell way harder/ sun x moon relationship 

Chapter 2 warnings: jealous neteyam/ mentions or anxiousness/ mentions of war and death/flirting/ mentions of dead animals/ mentions of grief and injuries/

Extra info:

Y/n is one year younger than neteyam, she is 18 and he is 19.

Lo’ak is 18 and Kiri is also 19. Tuk is 7-8 and spider is 19.

Extra characters: 

Ka’lik (y/ns father. A deceased warrior of the Omaticaya clan)

Zensira (y/n’s mother. deceased best singer and head songstress of the Omaticaya clan)

Makeyo (a warrior of the omaticaya clan. The same age as neteyam and went through iknimiya the same day as well. A filthy simp for y/n)

Kailo (Y/n’s ikran. Your ikran is a male ya’ll. sorry.)

Popiti (tuk’s best friend according to the visual dictionary)

Chapter two synopsis:

Neteyam comes to return y/n’s bracelet and has some internal conflict about his feelings towards her. Makeyo attempts to make a move on y/n and Neteyam experiences a different type of burning in his heart.

Neteyams Pov (trying something new by writing from neteyams pov as a little experiment. Lemme know how yall like it.)

☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆

“Neteyam”

For a moment the sound of my name leaving her lips in a breath is almost enough to forget myself and drop to my knees. 

The tuft of my tail thwacks the back of my head gently and i force my heartbeat to endure boundaries.

 I clear my throat, finding the words.

My eyes fan over her figure.

The moonlight contours the crevices of her curves. Her eyes, an amorous gold, spark themselves luminous. Almost Neon in the darkness of night. 

There's a bandage around her torso, and one around her left bicep. Her skin smells of grandmother's salves and wooden bowls.

It’s funny how fast the memories flood back. 

There was a time before she was made of fire.

Well, actually, I don't think that’s a fair statement.

There was always a spark. Always that small flicker refusing to perish even in strong winds.

I have memories of playing in the stream with my siblings and Y/n, and occasionally spider.  

She’d chase me. Her feet assaulted the shin deep water with the harsh sloshing of her feet. She tackled me and pulled on my tail. The sunburst air is sweet like nectar against our glistening skin and shrieks of laughter and springtime memories. 

Her laughter challenges the brightness of the sugared sun rays that danced through the canopy, it shakes the stars with its loud singing.

The scattered droplets of water seize on her skin as she chases lo’ak, carrying a smaller spider on her back.

Now she stands before me. Taller, stronger, a warrior in all its forms. 

I clear my throat once again, my eyes flickering over her body.

“How are you? Grandmother was able to treat you?”

She nods, leaning lightly against the wooden entrance frame of the marui.

“The wounds could have been worse. Mo’at was able to clean up the wounds just fine. Tsahik suggested i rest here for the night..’

She trials off, clicking her tongue as she gently taps her finger against the bandage.

The dwindling echoes of our breaths gently keep the silence afloat.

My eyes flicker up when her voice catches my ears.

“You? Any injuries?”

I shrug. “A few scratches. Nothing Serious. Lo’ak has a small bruise on his head but he’ll be fine. Mother treated us earlier.”

Something somber in her irises flickers. It’s small, but its not quiet. I open my mouth to speak but like most other things between us, she beats me to it.

“Why did you fly down there today? You could have been killed.”

There’s a hiss at the endnotes of her voice. And I don't blame her for being pissed. Not for a second.

I frown, I can feel my tail thump lightly against the ground.

“Lo’ak flew his way down there first. I wet after him.”

My confession trails a veil of blankness behind it that lingers in the air. She shakes her head, staring down.

“It’s not a thing of fault. I should have been more responsible. Im the older brother, after all-”

“Bullshit.”

The suddenness of her words make me pause. It wasn’t unexpected, but it seems a bit more vague than usual. Even for her.

“Y/n i-”

“No. No, Neteyam this has to come to an end. You can’t keep taking the fall for him. How many times will you let yourself fall off a cliff before you learn not to justify the one who pushed you off the ledge?”

I’m quiet for a moment. I feel another frown etch itself onto my lips.

“I must hold myself accountable as well. I am the future leader of this clan. If i cannot even keep my siblings out of trouble, how will I protect my people?” 

I’m sure loak had told her of the scolding we received from my father.

She takes a step closer, the fire in her gaze challenges all it sees. My heartbeat speeds up its sympathy.

“Then who protects you, Neteyam?”

I’m still for a moment. My throat hitches quietly and my words come up short.

She takes a breath and shifts herself back a bit, rubbing two fingers to her temple.

Her eyes creased with exhaust. I can tell the day has drained her.

“I’m sorry. I spoke out of line.”

“You never have to apologize to me.”

I can tell it surprises her a bit. How fast my words chased after her own.

My hesitation creeps its way through the blanket of gray that treads along the silence.

I clear my throat once again, averting my gaze.

“I’m glad you returned safely. I was worried sick.”

She chuckles and gently flips the small spiral in her hand.

“Had my lucky charm on my bow today. I guess i have you to thank.”

I cannot help but feel an ache every time I see that damned spiral. Iv’e tormented myself with an object so small it's pathetic. Really. A substitution for the words i couldn't speak.

I force a smile, a gentle chuckle to follow along.

“Well. I see its made some sort of use.”

She nods and places it gently back into the pocket of her loincloth.

I find myself doing the same, fishing around my own pocket until i hear the small clatter of beads.

Ihold her bracelet out to her.

“Here. You lost this today.”

She gasps softly. My heart beckons for my unspoken yearning whenever i saw her eyes light up like that. And fuck, I curse myself for looking away.

She placed it back on her wrist.

“Thank you, Neteyam. I would have been looking for days.”

When her fingers brush my palm a new wave of sun-streaked warmth swallows my chest in the pale moonlight.

“You don’t have to thank me.”

I would do anything for you.

She chuckles softly and I swear I feel my knees buckle at the sound.

All I can do is stare at her for a moment. My eyes tracing her curves and imagine it’s my fingertips, kissing my small apologies onto her skin.

The small breeze wisps at the small loose hairs that edged at her forehead, scattered out of her braids. Her scent is sweet. Her eyes are wondrously doe-like. 

I wish i could pocket the sounds of her laughter. I wish i could reach for her and brush her skin against mine if it meant even a second of her warmth is relished in. 

I want her. All of her. I want her fire even if it burns me. I want her wild high-tide seas even if they drown me. I want her heart even if I must beg for it. I want her lips, and her hands. I want every rough edge and every smooth surface.

It finds a way to bind me in its threshold of longing before I even register what I've done.

My hand reaches out. The planes in the lines of my palm rest against her cheek and the pad of my thumb rubs small circles on the small temple of a space in front of her ear.

I’d forget I ever existed if it was convenient for her.

There was a time I pretended she didn’t exist. Where fear and thought collided with my panic.

Years ago. After I gave her that spiral.

I made her mere presence become a voidance in my life. A small patch of blankness that traced her shape.

There’s a reason this void stands between us. I hurt her. And I will never forgive myself for it.

I was afraid. I was afraid of what my feelings would do to me. Of what it would do to the future olo’eyktan of this clan. I feared distraction. I feared devotion. And now i yearn for it. Call it a punishment, call it karma or something more. All I know is that I pushed her away. It of my arms, out of my circle, and I thought giving her that spiral would fix my mistakes.

It hurts me. The look in her eyes when I avoided her around the village. The way her gaze chased after me when i walked away

I was 15, afraid and stupid. I still haven’t forgiven myself from keeping her out of my circle.

Now I stand before her. This woman I may never deserve. This beautiful woman who will forever hold my heart in her hands.

She stares at me. But it's full of a sour memory that resonates on the edge of her tongue.

“Neteyam..”

There it is. How she says my name.

Fuck.

Fuck, why did I ever think, even for a mere moment my heart wasn’t hers?

Say it again.

Say it again,y/n please i beg you.

But I don't dare say it aloud.

Instead I whisper to her, my thumb stopping its movements for a moment as i cradle her head.

“Y/n, yawne. I am so, so sorry I didn't protect you today. I couldn't bare the thought of you in danger. “

She pushes my hand away, and for a moment the moonlight feels bitter.

“I don’t need your protection.”

It’s not that I think I don't deserve that.

But is it wrong for it to still ache?

“Y/n. please-”

“It is late, neteyam. I wish to rest now. Please.”

Theres a small tremble in the endnotes of her voice.

And i want to strangle the one who caused her this.

But what more can i do when i caused it myself?

I take a step back, gently bowing my head.

My eyes linger on her for a moment longer.

“Good night, Y/n.”

“Good night, Neteyam.”

As the tent flap closes, I take a step back. Staring up at the moon through the large crevices that topped the mountain of highcamp.

Maybe she doesn't belong in my arms.

I ache for her at night. I dream of holding her. I beg for the figment of her not to feebly collapse into  stardust and watch her wither out of my grasp. Her arrow aims at my heart and I tell her of my heartache.

She says nothing as I’m on my knees for her. Her glare is a cryptic mockery. She weakens me. Every moment of this fleeting moment within my reverie is a punishment. The morning sunset is bitter and the sky feels skeletal. 

To her my devotion is a joke and all I can think of is how fucking beautiful she is when she laughs.

I had a dream once that I kissed her. I kissed her until I couldn’t breathe. She tasted dark and delicate. 

I am hers. I was always hers. 

I’d let her ruin me.

Unravel every piece of me and stitch back together what left is salvaged of those small fragments and watch as they spell out her name.

Y/n.

Y/n.

Y/n.

Y/n.

☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ 

☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ 

The next morning was calmer than yesterday to say the least.

Lo’ak went with my father to hunt.

Kiri went with my grandmother to help in the Tsahik tent.

Y/n was off with her own duties, and that left me to help my mother in our family's marui.

Oh yeah, did I mention Tuk?

It wasn’t abnormal that I often found myself conversing with Tuk.

She sits in with her smaller legs tucked under her body. Her hands are much like mine and my mothers, but small and juvenile. They lack gracefulness as they scramble with my braids, slipping the beads she made all by herself (Kiri helped) into my braids. She giggles when I tell her about my hunts. She smacks my forehead with her palm when I tilt my head the wrong way. She climbs over me in all sorts of odd ways while I wince every now and then at the occasional stepping on of my tail.

“Teyam. Stop looking down!”

Tuktirey huffs and my head snaps up, all my attention shifting to my youngest sibling.

“Ah. sorry tuk-tuk.”

She sighs dramatically and continues stringing the beads into my hair.

I smile at my youngest sister. I was close with Tuk. me and her being the only two children out of my siblings that closely resembled my mother’s na’vi features. I don’t credit myself completely. I don’t think it's fair to say that my mother and fathers genes are divided narrowly. Lo’ak my have my fathers appearance but he wields my mothers rebelliousness with pride. Her survival instincts. Her thrill for a chase. Her fire and her wind. Grandmother always found herself amused whenever my mother found herself annoyed with Lo’aks antics. Apparently my mother was no different when she was his age. Chasing rainstorms and dancing through fire. Grandmother always says lo’ak is my mothers shadow.

Me, on the other hand? i've always strived to be like my father. I still do. I remember sitting around a fire as a small child, listening to stories of his days of battle and heroicness. I don’t glorify my father as much as I did then. But he’s still the same man to me, all the same.

Tuk is in the middle of rambling about her morning gossip she gathered from Popiti, as she strings another bead onto my braids.

It's a bit of a guilty pleasure, I suppose. Being entertained by other’s conflicts.  Certainly not proper behavior for the eldest son of toruk makto. Alas, what kind of big brother would I be if I didn't let Tuk carry herself away with her words without worry?

I can’t hide that I enjoy it. But telling myself its for tuk helps a bit.

“And then what?” I query Tuk softly, urging her to continue her story.

She giggles before placing a green colored bead on my braids.

“Well, Popiti’s big sister, Kyuna, didn’t take Takuk’s courting gift!”

I gasp, over-exaggerating my shock to amuse my younger sister, she nods, equally as shocked.

“I know, right!?”

I shake my head, feining disappointment as Tuk giggles.

“My eywa. Poor Takuk.”

Tuk nods, patting down my braids gently.

I try to look over to my right side at where she sat without turning my head.

“Did she say why?”

Tuk shrugged.

“Popiti heard her mom and Kyuna talking. Kyuna said that she didnt want Takuk for a mate.”

I nod, fidgeting with my beaded choker.

“Huh. Well then, good for Kyuna. She knows what she wants, i guess.”

I trail off with my own internal theories.

I knew Kyuna. She was a young healer in the clan. I didn’t care for her much. She was a bit cocky. Always had some excuse for getting out of tasks she didn’t feel like completing.

I also knew Takuk.

I had been in hunting groups with him. We went through iknimaya training together. He was smart. A fine huner. A decent provider. He seemed like a fine mate for anyone. 

Tuk suddenly gasped, her ears twitching as she stared up at me with her big eyes.

“Teyam! You could be Kyuna’s mate!”

I still at her revelation, she blinks at me with baited breath for  response.

I cant help but chuckle as i ruffle the smaller girl’s braids.

“It's a kind offer, Tuk. But I'm not ready to mate yet. Remember what I told father?” 

Who could forget? The most awkward family dinner in the world where i pleaded with my father to give me more time before I choose a mate. My siblings watching as me and my father bickered for a good hour. I think its really the only time iv’e stood up to him. Disagreed with him. My father has been patient since then when it comes to finding my tsahik. But the only reason he is because of my mother finally convinced him to give it a rest.

Finding a mate can be a long process for some.

I already knew who i wanted my mate to be. There wasn’t any debate. And I will wait for her. I will wait to earn her trust back. For as long as it takes. I will be hers for when shes ready. I am hers even when she’s not. That is a promise I refuse to break.

Tuk huffs.

“But whyyyy? Kyuna is pretty. Not as pretty as mama or kiri or y/n-

But she’s not mated.”

I sigh and gently rub Tuk’s back.

“You’ll understand when you’re older. I promise.”

She huffs again but nods, going back to braiding my hair.

Shes in the middle of telling me about the big fish she caught when my father took her to the creek the other day when my mother enters the tent, a basket of fruits under her arm.

I straighten up a bit and Tuk gasps happily, standing to her feet and jogging over to my mother.

“Mama! You’re back!”

She hugs my mothers waist, and my mother places a hand on tuks head while trying to balance the basket filled to the brim with yovo fruits.

I stand up, gently taking the basket from under her arm, chuckling softly.

“Here, Sa’nok. (mother) Let me take that for you.”

She sighs in releif, nodding at me, now fully embracing tuk with two free arms.

“Irayo (thank you) Neteyam.”

Tuk sits back down in her previous spot and i carry the basket to the small wooden table, placing it down.

“Nice haul today?”

She smiles at me. “The new grove has almost completed its growth cycle. It's almost time for a new harvest.”

I nod, making a mental reminder to tell my father that later so he can organize more foraging groups. 

“Mama, look at how pretty Neteyam is.”

My mother gently examines my newly beaded braids with her fingers, gently taking each braid between her thumb and her palm.

“Very good work, tuktirey. You should help me do mine later. Why don’t you go to your grandmothers tent, hm? I left a large bowl of new beads on the far side corner, near her salve pouch.

Her eyes sparkle and before my mother can say another word, Tuk is racing out of the tent flap.

I laugh along with my mother, and she sits, starting to cut up some fruits.

“Ma’itan, could you help me with this?”

I nod, unsheathing my knife and sitting down next to her, helping her peel some fruits.

A silence fills the air for a moment, until my mothers soft, accented voice breaks through the gray.

“What troubles you, Neteyam?”

Of course she knew.

I was born from the pieces of my mothers ash-littered broken promises and my father’s guilt-ridden internal death sentence. 

My mother and i were tapestries weaved from the same colors.

I am my mother’s son.

She knew me like the back of her hand. She doesn’t have to recognize me by face. I know my father and my mother both love me. But when my mask cracks like this, my mother isn’t like my father. He tries to tighten it to ensure it doesn’t fall down again. My mother tries to mend the cracks.

I sigh, avoiding her gaze.

“Nothing Sa’nok. I am fine.”

I’m a shit liar. That’s just a known fact about me. She knows i’m lying. And maybe thats a good thing. Maybe she knows to just leave it be.

She chucks another fruit skin peel to the side as it forms a small pile with the other discadrded peels. 

“Is it because of your fathers words, yesterday? He was harsh, I know..But he is just afraid, Neteyam.”

That’s not what’s wrong, but I decide it's better than saying ‘hey ma i’m helplessly in love with a woman who probably hates my guts’

Daddy issues it is.

I nod, still avoiding her gaze.

“Yes. I know. Father just wants what's best for us.”

My mother sighs for a moment, pausing her movements, her knife ceasing its carving into the new fruit.

She looks over at me and she smiles.

There’s something about that smile. It’s like an echo that beckons your name. It’s like a face with lines scribbled over it. Sometimes when my mother looks at me I feel as if she’s seeing someone else. Flesh wrapped around the stories foretold under my bones. 

She see’s someone else’s shadow in my place. As if a ghost welcomes itselfinto the sequence of a wreckage of memories unknown to me. 

She speaks quietly.

“Your father and you are more alike than you may think, Neteyam.”

I can’t hep but smile at her words. Theres fanned flowers that grow under the gray cast of gilded clouds under the garden of her irises. She smiles too.

“I mean it, Neteyam. I see more of him in you every day, my son.”

I’m quiet for a moment, but my smile only falters slightly.

“What was he like, my father? When you first met him?”

My mother sighs, the infinite memories flickering past her eyes.

“When I first met your father, I was trying to kill him.”

I can’t help but chuckle. The story all too familiar to me from being told countless times as a child. But it’s not quite what im looking for.

“No, no- i know how you met but-

What was he like? Really?..”

My mother thinks for a moment, not sparing me a glance as she continues cutting her fruit.

“He was stupid. An idiot. I did not think he would survive a single day out here in the forest.”

I hum in agreement trying to visualize everything from her eyes.

“But he was..”

She sighs.

“He was persistent. Like a weak animal with no hope of survival. But it just refuses to die. Sometimes I thought the world moved twice as fast for him..he was eager. To learn, to live. To taste the wind and the sky..”

For a moment, I see a secondary shadow behind the  fragments of my parents love story.

My father told me he felt drawn to my mother from the first moment he saw her.

I see something else in place of the ghost behind the path of stars that led my mother to my father.

I see a man who yearns for a woman. I see a man on his knees, I see his devotion. I see his heart in his hands, i see his stained fingertips of an unfamiliar sleepless skin.

I see a woman so beautiful she might as well be a figment of the moonlight, and i’m jealous of the wind and the air and the breeze because of how easily it touches her skin.

I see her arrow aimed at his heart and the distrust in her eyes. I see her anger, and her betrayal as it echoes through a bitter blue heinous flame.

I see y/n. And I see her wall that kept me out.

I look at my mother, a shell of something that once was taking a new shape.

Was it possible? For history to rhyme?

“How..how long did it take you to love him? Even though he was an enemy.. Even though you didn;t trust him?”

My mother is silent for another moment.

She gently places her knife down, placing her hands on her thighs as she stared at the blank tented wall infront of her.

“I think it was foretold by the stars, ma’itan.

I hated him. I hated him because of what he was and where he came from. I hated his false demon body and i hated the way he walked, and talked. I hated his hair and his hands and his eyes. 

I hated him because of what his people took from me. I hated him because of the pain they caused my people..

The day I found him in the forest i was going to kill him. My arrow was aimed at his heart. But when the great mother spoke to me I knew better than not to listen.

I think i was always meant to meet him. To teach him my people’s ways..Because it led me to loving him. 

That morning when I returned from the tree of souls with him, 

My mother had told me if i choose this path, to be his mate, i could never be tsahik.

I told her, "He was my path.”

I’m still as i take in my mother’s words. But the clouds still creep behind my uncertain heartbeat.

“But hometree. And the war. How did you forgive him?”

My mother gently takes my hand in hers, and she takes a breath

“Ma’itan. You will someday learn that love is not easy. It is hungry. It is impatient. It is loud and it is often hidden.

Love gave me many gifts. You, your siblings, my home and my family.

But it has taken much from me all the same. 

Love is like swimming in the ocean at night. It's deep, it's dark, the shallows far from reach. But Within that darkness I found your father. I found my light, and someday you will find yours.”

Love is sacrificial. My mother was right. Love isnt easy. Love is sometimes caged and flightless, thick with bitter scents and tearstained starlight. Its bare, and its real, its bruised and blemished and its beautiful because its her. Its Y/n. My y/n. Her name is a hymn of scattered prayers lost to a dreaded dawn and a coppered colored sun. She’s made of every broken and perfect piece of the universe and the stars stumble over their words to describe her beauty

She’s the moon and i’m the sun. Withering myself away every night to allow her to shine. 

I will sacrifice. I will work. 

She has weakened me. The night sky canvases her skin while the bleakness of sunlight mosaics mine. Famined for her touch, I refuse to look away. I refuse to blink. The sky is a game of chance and the sunset swallows me whole. The scarlet screams in the hellish hues of cerise ablaze under her skin.

I will not settle for anything less than her.

Love is sacrificial. Then i will steal the night sky for her.

I softly smile at my mother before squeezing her hand.

“Thank you, mother.”

☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ 

(Y/n’s pov) 

Love was a funny thing.

You used to think your love for neteyam was forged from heartbeat-rhythmed nightskies and dripping orange soaked sunsets.

It was dreamlike. Bleeding through every crevice and hidden place with its incandescence. 

He was a part of you. Apart of everything you were and everything you did.

He was in your dreams when you closed your eyes at night.

He was in the shied morning sun rays that crept over the mountain tops. He was in the wild winds and draped under midnight melodies.

Its the memories of smaller things you remember most. 

Giggling while he fumbled with an arrow when he noticed you were watching him practice. 

Helping Neytiri stitch together his cummerbund to gift to him when he had completed his iknimiya. You remember the look of pride in his eyes when he wore a piece of your handiwork to represent this new chapter in his life. Concluding his training as a hunter, and becoming a warrior.

You remember taking walks with him through the forest, and the way he would hold a branch back out of your way.

You remember hunting with him, and racing him down the trailed path. 

You remember perching on a branch and watching the stars with him. You remember his warmth as he whispered to you all the constellations his father taught him. You remember his hands gently guiding yours to trace the patterns scattered among the stars.

You remember a spark.

And then, you remember a gust of wind that dulled the warmth.

Distance. You can recall distance.

It started out small.

Frequent training with his father.

Watching his siblings.

Hunting. Preparing. Working. 

His touch became something you started to crave. Not something that came granted. You remember waiting for him. Waiting for him to return from his hunt, waiting to go stargazing. Liek he promised. You remember checking the sky, the scarlet and blue collide to signify the subduing trials of daylight making its exit.

You remember your mother asking you what you were doing outside.

“Waiting.”

Is all you responded.

You didn’t tell her what you waited for.

Waiting.

Waiting.

Waiting.

He never showed up.

As the sky darkened, it started to rain.

There weren't any stars that night anyways. spider dragged you back inside. Complaining about how he wasn’t taking care of you if you got sick. 

Maybe it wasn't rain at all. Maybe the stars didn't come out that night because they were too busy falling through the cracks left in your heart.

You felt forgotten. Unloved. Unwanted.

Lo’ak told you that Jake was always on Neteyam’s ass about his training, and thats why he was so distant.

But it wasn’t just the distance.

His eyes no longer brightened when he looked at you. Its the gaze you give someone when they’re speaking to you, and you aren’t really listening. You’re just waiting for them to be done talking.

Spider watched you come home and cry one night, listened to you scream into your palms and rant angrily for hours about the boy who broke your heart.

Then, the night the sky turned red, a new kind of broken was born.

You remember hearing the whooshing of wings and panicked shrieks of stray ikrans, The unfamiliar scent of something metallic and sulfured. 

You remember running into the morning that barely crept ist light over the canopy tips, the still dark sky like a cloak encased the world.

You remember finding your mothers songcord on the ground. You remember finding her body. You remember seeing your fathers not but a few feet away.

You remember the feeling of the air being mercilessly ripped from your lungs.

You remember Jake running towards you, his own panic flooding your ears as he begged you to leave with him. That it wasn’t safe there.

He had to drag you away, holding you tight to him as you practically collapsed into his chest in the front of his ikran. 

You remember stumbling into the village upon return, Neytiri catching you in her arms and the blurred sight of her own tear stained face as she cupped your face in her hands. You screamed and cried and fell to your knees as Lo’ak rushed to your side, shushing you gently and rubbing your back.

You remember showing spider the song chord.

You think he cried harder than you did. You both lost your family that day.

You remember the hollowness in the cup of your palm as neteyam held your hand. 

You remember when he gifted you that spiral under the starlight.

You always thought he was the sun. And now you know for sure.

Forever out of your reach. Aching for the stretches of salvageable warmth blessed upon your finger tips. You could chase it to the ends of Pandora but every night it would abandon you. 

You loved him even if you didn’t know what he was.

Like the sky he was a mystery. Endless but in the midst of the universe it held many treasures he swore he kept just for you. Songs of starlight and supernovas.

You reached for nothing. Hoping to grab the sky and pull yourself into his light. Feel the sunlight on your palm and chase it like the golden hour was a game of chance. 

But now, you knew for sure he was the sun.

But he wasn’t your sun.

This sun was made of stone. It was heavy and roughed. 

The sky was no longer a mystery. The sun no longer honeyed your skin in favor. Tragedy prevailed the night sky and when his blanket of warmth tried to regain its sanctuary of safety to encase your tainted trust, all you saw was a trail of falling stars you called rain and broken promises.

☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ 

One of your tasks is to teach the younger children of the clan.

You didn’t mind it much. You often found it quite enjoyable.

You beat out most of the young warriors in your group when the clan was discussing who would train the young warriors. Only the best archer of your age group would have such a role.

It was down to you and a girl named Kyuna. She was skilled, but you were better

You chuckle as the little ones scurry past you, little shrieking giggles as they place their practice bows in a pile. 

You doubted yourself. You doubted your ability to train those younger than you.  What reasons can you give them for fighting when your own was grief?

Seeing the children and watching them learn gave you hope. Hope for a better future. 

The lessons today seemed to drag on. The thought of Neteyams words had lingered in your mind since last night. 

You sighed to yourself softly as you started to gather all the bows in a basket. Letting your thoughts run free.

“Need help with that?”

You swung yourself around, a hand instinctively resting on the top of your knife sheath, 

You found yourself face to face with a slightly taller na’vi boy. His braids to his shoulders. His smile hatched itself on baited breath, his white freckles that scattered across his face.

“Makeyo. For eywa’s sake don’t sneak up on me like that.”

He chuckled in mock surrender, throwing his hands up.

“I know better than to mess with the mighty Y/n. Don’t want to end up with an arrow in my neck.”

You roll your eyes and shoved him playfully.

Makeyo was one of your fathers students. He was a skilled archer, often competing with Neteyam. You grew closer after your parents death. Makeyo was your partner when lt came to training the younger children of the clan. Having already completed his iknimiya, and being a strong piece of the people, he was perfect for assisting you with your role.

“Great practice today, huh?”

The two of you found yourselves chatting while you walked back to the supply tent to return the arrows.

You nodded.

“Ya’here is getting better. Her form has improved.”

He smiled at you, his tail gently brushing your thigh.

“She’ll make a fine warrior one day. She always tells me she wants to be just like you?”

You try to hide the small shock that jolted through you at the sudden contact, with an awkward smile.

“Well, thats scary as shit.”

He raised a brow.

“Why?”

You shrugged.

“Knowing she wants to be just like me? I’m a wreck.”

He sighs, holding the tent flap open for you.

“Well, I think you’re perfect.”

The world seems to still for a moment, and your body feels stiff.

“You’re brave. And strong, and honorable…”

He took a step forward. 

“You’re passionate, and you care for others. Especially those kids.”

He gently places a hand on your arm, its firm, but its not demanding.

You feel your breath hitch, and your tail flicks behind you.

“Makeyo. We shouldn’t-”

“Are we intruding?”

You turn to see spider and Lo’ak.

Lo’ak glares at Makeyo, and spider marches in between the two of you, his smaller frame seemingly less intimidating, but you appreciate the effort.

“All right back it up lover boy.

No no, farther than that. far enough that i don’t smell your lack of personal space.”

Spider tugs at your wrist, shooing Makeyo away.

You groan, smacking  spider with your tail.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Makeyo.”

Makeyo nods, waving awkwardly to spider and lo’ak before making his exit.

“Uh huh. Keep it moving.”

Lo’ak ushers him away and you hiss at both of them.

“Hey. Dumb and dumber. what the fuck?”

You glare.

Spider throws his hands up in surrender, shaking his head.

“I don’t like that guy, sis.”

The three of you start making your way back towards the sully tent for the night.

You bickered the whole way.

Spider sighs,pointing his thumb in the opposite direction. 

“All i’m saying is, big mac over there-”

“His name is Makeyo.”

Spider shrugs.

“Same thing-

But anyways. I don’t like him.”

Lo’ak nods.

“He’s desperate. He wants you bad.”

You roll your eyes.

“Makeyo was just being nice.”

Lo’ak scoffs.

“Y/n, I love you. I really do. But if that’s nice, then flirting might mean getting you pregnant.”

Spider jumps and smacks the back of Lo’ak’s head, making him stumble and wince.

“Son of a bitch-

What was that for!?”

Spider glares at the taller blue boy. 

“Don’t jinx it! I’m not ready to be an uncle!?”

“Who’s going to be an uncle?”

Its the moment you hear Jake’s voice the three of you realize you’ve stumbled into the Sully's tent.

The three of you look at one another, then back at Jake.

Spider whistles, pointing to an imaginary watch.

“Oh boy. Would you look at the time? Time for me to go meet norm for dinner…I’ll catch you guys later.”

Lo’ak calls spider a bitch under his breath for abandoning the two of you two deal with the heap of awkwardness.

Jake resumes his task and Neytiri’s voice calls from inside.

“Lo’ak, Y/n. come on, its time to eat.”

You make your way inside, and Neytiri and Kiri come into view, steaming some meat over a fire.

Kiri waves and jogs her way over to give you a hug, her only slightly taller frame pressed against yours.

“Hey. how was your day?” She hums, tucking a braid behind your ear.

Kiri’s voice was melodic and soothing. It drips like the dew drops onto morning grass, kissed by the forest scent.

You go to answer, but before you can you’re body slammed by a smaller na’vi.

“Y/n! You’re back!”

It only takes a blink of an eye for you to open your arms for her, picking her up and putting her on your hip.

“Hey Tuk! How’s my sweet girl?”

Tuk giggles and nuzzles her head onto your neck.

Lo’ak rudley pushes his way between you and kiri.

“Excuse me, don’t i get a hug?”

He huffs dramatically, flipping his braids like some sort of diva.

“Of course you can, Ma’itan.” Neytiri appears behind him and kisses his head. You and the girls giggle and Lo’ak groans.

“Maaa. come on-”

He swats neytiri away and she chuckles, giving you a quick shoulder squeeze next.

“Did your lessons go okay today? How were the children?”

You take a seat next to Kiri, Lo’ak on your other side as Neteyam takes a seat next to Tuk, 

You nod in response to Neytiri as Jake hands everyone a piece of meat.

“Doing well. They are making progress. They are learning faster every day. I think they will be ready to try larger arrows soon. Possibly farther targets.”

Jake pats your back.

“Nice work, kiddo.”

“Speaking of targets...”

Lo’ak mumbles under his breath,you respond by smacking him with your tail.

“What?”

Kiri raises an eyebrow.

Lo’ak shrugs.

“Makino or whatever his name is was flirting with Y/n.”

Kiri smiles at you, gently shaking your shoulder.

“Makeyo? He is a fine warrior.”

You groan, not noticing how Neteyams ears pinned back slightly.

“Makeyo?”

His deep, accented voice pulls your focus towards where the boy sat.

All the sudden the space arounds you feels a bit shallow. Lo’ak answers for you.

“Oh yeah. He was really quite brave. He wouldn't have been so brave if he knew me and spider were planning to feed him to a thanator.”

Jake sighs.

“Must we plot a murder at the dinner table?”

Neytiri nods, swallowing her food and handing a piece of her fruit to Tuk.

“Your father is right. Besides, There is no rush for any of you to mate. Y/n, Makeyo would make a fine life partner but you need not decide anytime soon, my sweet.”

Tuk pipes up suddenly.

“Teyam is gonna be mated with kyuna!”

Neteyam nearly spits out his water, going into a coughing fit as he repeatedly brings his fist to his chest to attempt to stop it.

Jake immediately started patting his back, concerned.

“Jesus christ boy! Easy now, don’t forget to swallow.”

“You have chosen Kyuna?”

It comes out more bitter than you thought. The mere thought of another woman in his arms stinging an unfamiliar scorch in your chest,

Or maybe..it wasn’t so unfamiliar.

Neteyam finally breathes normally again and shake his head frantically.

‘“What? No! Of course not.”

“Kyuna? Really bro? Shes kinda a bitch…”

Lo’ak says, attempting to mask it with his own fake cough.

“Hey. Language.”

Jake scolds, pointing his knife he was using to cut Tuk’s meat with at Lo’ak.

“Its true though! She’s always hustling me to do her chores!”

Neytiri raises her eyebrow.

“If it happens repeatedly why do you keep falling for it?”

Lo’ak had no answer.

Kiri clicked her tongue.

“Y/n, didn’t you overrun Kyuna’s role for training the younger children.”

“Oh yeah! That's right! Y/n made her eat dust in that archery trial. No surprise there.”

You felt a small heat spread to your cheeks out of embarrassment.

“It wasn’t that big of a deal…”

Neytiri chuckles and Neteyam speaks up.

“so..Makeyo. You work with him?’

You nod.

“He helps me train the younger group of children. He’s actually quite helpful.

You didn’t notice the way neteyams ears pinned back slightly.

But Lo’ak did.

“Yeah. But he sucks at Ikran riding.” 

You raised your eyebrow. 

Come to think of it, You don’t think you ever saw him ride his ikran.

“He is?”

Lo’ak nods.

“He and Neteyam went hunting one time. The idiot crashed into a tree while neteyam swerved it easily.”

You can’t help but laugh at the image, and Lo’ak winked at neteyam.

☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾𖤓 ⋆⁺₊⋆☾𖤓✮⋆⁺₊⋆ 

Authors note:

HOLY FUCKKKK! I’m finally done! This actually did not take as long as i thought it would. 

It’s not as long as the last chapter ya’ll i’m sorry. But hopefully the close times in which both were posted makes up for it?

We’re gonna get some kiri and y/n bonding time in next chapter and hopefully some more jealous neteyam. Btw what did we think of the neteyam pov? Leave some comments about it so i can know whether to add it in later.

Taglist:

@mntx666

@isnt-itstrange

@thebestrouge

@bay7let

@fairuzwhat

@jackiehollanderr

@6423btw

@satesatesate2009

[3terna15unshin3]

Connected

—

A/N: idea came from this ask, so thank u anon🥰🥰 it was so fun to think of how Matty and Este’s relationship was seen from the other side like what fans pick up on, and also establish how much they decide to share with fans vs keep to themselves. this concept is so interesting to me but i had a hard time writing from the pov of a fan hahaha so i just did it this way instead :))

This obvs is based heavily on TBSG lore so none of this makes sense if you haven’t read the main fic - go do that first!! and also check out the Instagram AUs, they add to the pizazz

—

“Love, look what I just saw on Twitter. This is hilarious.”

Este points her phone screen towards Matty as they sit in bed on a Sunday morning. He yawns, tired and still half asleep, then blinks his eyes a few times to read what she’s showing him. It’s a tweet from a fan that sits in her mentions from a couple of days ago when a clip from his Zane Lowe interview resurfaced.

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

thinking about the fact that matty mentioned meeting e.manansala when she worked at a bookstore in manc to zane and in this 2018 interview he said his fav spot in the city is Greenhouse Books …….. what are the chances this is the same bookstore bc that would be so😭😭😭💔💔💔💔 https://manchesterwire.co.uk/?s=matty+healy+give-yourself-a-try/arts&culture/article

jaymie SAW UNDO LIVE trmanb1ackk

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND

Hold on you might be onto something

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

→ Replying to trmanb1ackk

right like okaayyy bookstore worker x customer to lovers notting hill pipeline????? 🤭 huge if true

She watches his eyes scan over the text and a fuzzy smile grow on his face. Matty loves talking about Este when he can—to bring some much deserved attention to her writing—and did so often, but does’t always mention many the details of their relationship. That was until strolling around the Northern Quarter with Zane brought a bit of it out of him.

Este is what brings him back to Manchester the most often, from visiting her family and Cate and Georgia to just needing a bit of a homey feeling from its familiar pubs and nostalgic shops. So, naturally, Matty talked about her in the interview done for the release of Being Funny—explaining how they’d met and how much the city means to them both.

“How they put two and two together is beyond me,” he says, scratching his head. “That Manchester Wire interview was five years ago now, you know. Did you ever read that?”

She chuckles. “Course I did! We had a few fans come in that summer with the sole intention of coming to a place you recommended, actually.”

“Why have you never told me that?” Matty asks, “You’re welcome for the business, by the way.”

“You never even told me about your little shout out, to be fair. I had to find out on my own,” Este teases. “Plus, we weren’t even a thing at that point—we’d met once! Quite creepy, in retrospect.”

“When you put it like that it’s honestly so cringe so please change the subject now.” Matty buries his head in the bunches of sheets that sit in her lap, embarrassed and frankly too sleepy to defend himself.

Este giggles, letting her hands settle into his curls. “Oh c’mon, you weren’t cringe. I’m just pulling your leg. It was sweet,” she reassures him.

“You’re just saying that because you feel bad,” he whines, then rubs his eyes to try and get the sleep out of them. “That’s so crazy that they dug that up, though. I’m not sure if many people know you’ve been around since then.”

“They probably looked at your life in 2019 and figured you were a rockstar with a new girl in every city but in reality you were calling me to get to sleep every night and doing origami in your free time because it reminded you of me.”

Matty’s jaw drops at her blunt comments. “I was about to get mad but I can’t even disagree.” He sits up, raking the hair out of his eyes. “Do people still use the word ‘simp’? Can that be applied to this situation? Was I a simp?”

She throws her head back, mouth wide, as she laughs at how ridiculous his question is.

“Please don’t say ‘simp’, love. You’re 34.” Este squeezes out between her giggles, “But no, people don’t use that word anymore. And yes it can be applied. And also yes, you were. And still are.”

“Proudly am,” he adds.

She leans into his side and he snakes his arm around her waist. They sit there, Matty only in a pair of pyjama pants and her an oversized tee, scrolling through the funny replies to the tweet and how big of a deal some fans were making it.

“You should respond. Tell Megs that she’s right.”

“Seriously?” Este asks, shocked that he’d want her to engage in something so meaningless and speculative.

But alas, he nods casually with a smile. “Yeah. They seem sweet, and just curious. And maybe being such a simp will give me some brownie points,” confirms Matty.

“God, enough of that word!”

Este e.manansala

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND

Can confirm🤝

liv livmymistake_

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND and e.manansala

MEGS OH MY GOD

Jude 🥾🌎 ittsjudesk

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND and e.manansala

UMMMMMMMMMMM

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

→ Replying to e.manansala

omg hi😭😭😭 are being fr i can’t cope

Este e.manansala

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND

Greenhouse is the bookstore i worked at and is where matty and i met that year:)) and hi💌

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

→ Replying to e.manansala

i think i’m psychic for guessing that🤭🤭🤭🤭

—

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

k now i’m going crazy bc i had no clue him and este had been dating for that long💀 was genuinely convinced it had been 3 years max

Jude 🥾🌎 ittsjudesk

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND

Literally they didn’t post each other until like 2020

sarah🧸 _102sar

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND

I think she was at the 2018 Pryzm show too. Not sure but I was at the after party and remember seeing her there lol

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

→ Replying to _102sar

WHAT…….. this lore being uncovered omg

“Someone recognises you from the Brief Inquiry album release show?!” exclaims Matty in disbelief. “There’s no way.”

They still sit in bed as Este types away, having fun interacting with the small group. He leans his head on her shoulder and watches her as she does it.

“They’ve known you longer than I have, you know. They know their stuff,” she responds.

“Even I don’t remember you being at the Pryzm show.”

Este’s mouth falls open in shock, thoroughly offended. “You prick.”

“I’m joking!” Matty defends through fits of laughter. “C’mon E, I’m joking.”

She knows he is, but enjoys the theatrics of it all; shoving his head off her shoulder and scooting away from his touch in protest.

“That was a special night for me! The first time I saw you play and met the guys! Don’t make fun!” Este pouts, crossing her arms playfully.

“Fine. I take it back, I take it back,” Matty begs, dragging her back over to him and bringing her legs over top of his. He grabs her hand and places a kiss on her palm. “I remember meeting Cate, and introducing you to Louis. And Ross making fun of my gallbladder surgery, and leaving Cate on the dance floor to get drinks, and screaming at each other over the music at the bar. You telling me about the anniversary party. I very much remember!”

“Okay, okay. Enough gushing. I forgive you.”

Matty pecks her palm once more and shuffles her even closer. “Open Twitter back up. This is fun.”

Jude 🥾🌎 ittsjudesk

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND and _102sar

This is absolutely shocking bc how did his chronically online ass manage to hide a whole gf that long

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

→ Replying to ittsjudesk

fr!!! like do we think she was on the abiior tour with them bc i swear jordan absolutely fed us with so much bts content it would be impossible to miss?? someone dig

sarah🧸 _102sar

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1D and ittsjudesk

If u scroll back on her IG u can see Matty in her comments since then. And they’d repost each other on their stories and stuff🥲 So not that hidden if ur a stalker like me lmao

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

→ Replying to _102sar

thoroughly upset that i missed so much bf matty content </3

Este e.manansala

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND and _102sar

Ignore me stalking u🤭🤭 i was indeed at that Pryzm show lol but we weren’t dating yet. And during abiior tour I saw a few UK shows but otherwise i was just in Manc working/being a bad groupie x

Este e.manansala

→ Replying to PL4YINGONMYM1ND

Also matty is sitting beside me now and he is cool with me filling u in (it was his idea) and he says hi. and that u guys are cute

megs ⎕ PL4YINGONMYM1ND

→ Replying to e.manansala

ohhh yes u are a working woman how could i forget!! bookstore worker/groupie same difference. thank u for responding😭 u are the coolest❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 (also hi matty😳)

Jude 🥾🌎 ittsjudesk

→ Replying to e.manansala

Hi Matty sorry for calling u chronically online x

Este e.manansala

→ Replying to ittsjudesk

He forgives you (but it’s true imo)

liv livmymistake_

→ Replying to e.manansala

este wait i have to know …. since u are a former bookstore girlie turned writer are u the reason matty periodically spam posts a bunch of literature on his instagram stories???? did u convert him to bookstoregirlieism??

Este e.manansala

→ Replying to livmymistake_

I am obsessed with the idea that he was illiterate before meeting me so i’m gonna say yes. thank u for that

Este e.manansala

→ Replying to livmymistake_

Liv it’s me I stole the phone and don’t appreciate this sentiment tbh. You should know I’ve always been a wanker so all the literature spams are just me letting that out and este just enables me. hope that helps x Matty

[arkive78]

ATZ Fanfics I’ll Forever Reread

Ok so most of this blog is me reblogging some of my favorite ATZ content, and I thought I’d make a masterpost of some of my all-time favorites. Please let me know if links aren’t working btw! A lot of these have NSFW/18+ content, so minors please DO NOT interact with those mentioning 18+ or NSFW below the cut!!!

** Updated: August 25, 2022 (added some fics and also tidied it up a bit hehe)

✨ Mists of Celeste by @hongism

NSFW!!, space pirate au

Ok, so if you’ve been on ATZ tumblr, you SURE have heard of this story by now, its at like 46 (roughly I might be remembering wrong) chapters of pure space-pirate galore and it’s honestly one of my favorite stories ever. It is NSFW, and is. M/18+, so yeah, it’s got smut and violence and trauma. 

The way she writes is absolutely amazing from the world building to character development it’s insane. No character is perfect, and honestly the MC is such a badass it’s just amazing. The personas she builds is just crazy and I swear she’s a god at tying plot points together or dropping some of the juiciest info or moments at the BEST TIME!!! 

Also, if you love pirates, this fic is great. I’m such a hoe for this fic it’s insane, it’s so well done and just everything one could want. It also has MANY funny moments that had me cackling. I do love the very “human” moments of just dissecting the human psyche or emotions and dealing with trauma and the like, or even the complications of relationships and ethics. Overall a work of art.

✨ Horizon by @pxedpiper

SFW, pirate au

Another iconic pirate ATZ fic, I read this one a LONG time ago, but it’s a classic pirate AU with the MC as a princess who gets stuck on ATZ’s ship and it’s very found family vibes and cute. 

It’s 21 chapters of everything I love too, and is completed hehe. It is Hongjoong x reader, so it’s even 100000x better because I am a huge simp for Captain Hongjoong on so many levels it’s a shame that there’s not more pirate Hongjoong fics. 

✨ Do you believe in fate? by @lettersfromaphrodite

SFW, soulmate au, magic au

A glorious HJ x reader chapter story with soulmates, magic, and all that good stuff. I read this one a long time ago, but the story is just so good and I love a good soulmate AU ahhhh. There is a sequel that’s a Chan x reader one (as in Chan from SKZ).

✨ Pirate King by @chaseatinydream

SFW, pirate au

NOW THIS!! THISSSSSS!!!!! I rmb when I first found this and was like huh this is a lot of chapters, and I wonder what it’s like. I swear hands-down I obsessively read the HELL out of this. IT’S SO GOOD!!!! 

It is another Pirate AU (my favorite), and it’s done so well I screeched multiple times, the whole story is so immersive and you literally cannot help but keep reading it, I would read this story til like 3AM it’s crazy. 

The MC’s storyline is SO COOL and unique from what I’ve seen. And the ending is just absolute perfection. I would make everyone read this if I could (like MOC LOL).

✨ Body Talk by @jungkxook

NSFW, 18+ smut

This is a 3 part story FWB! Wooyoung x virgin!reader, and the story is basically, reader asks wooyoung to take her virginity and the like. The smut is written so well and I just love a good ole idiots to lovers vibes because obviously they’re both in denial LOL.

✨ You’re the one that I want by @ateezmakemeweep

18+ NSFW

this is peak Badboy!Seonghwa do not get me started. This author has the tendency to pull you in and immerse you and then destroy you in the best of ways. 

I have actually not finished this out of fear of what happens next but lemme tell you, if you love a good angsty love story, read tf outta this. the way they write this story is just PERFECTION with the build-up and everything. 

Highly recommend this author in the first place but man, this was so good and the relationship building is awesome too (and ofc the angst if you love it). I swear I’ll finish this one day when I’m emotionally ready.

✨ Richboy!Seonghwa by @ateezmakemeweep

18+, NSFW

but another iconic writing by this amazing author. You will become obsessed immediately. It’s just absolute perfection.

✨ Into the Aurora by @honeyhotteoks

18+ NSFW

one of my favorite ot8 x reader fics, premise is really great and written VERY WELL. 

It’s so good it will have you absolutely SWOONING!!!!!! 

✨ Murphy’s Law by @uhmingi

NSFW, 19+ a/f/s, soulmate au, alien au, enemies to friends to lovers, san x reader, and ?/reader

the way I’m absolutely OBSESSED WITH THIS STORY??? should be illegal, it literally had me geeking out from the very first chapter, especially with the whole AU itself. 

Because aliens? How you gonna portray that? what kind of world are we in? And like literally it has me on the floor freaking out over how GOOD IT IS. 

Literally I had no idea what would happen next with each chapter. There is sadly only going to be 4 chapters, BUT I feel like this story will end satisfyingly, that’s the vibes I’m getting. 

But man, I will forever wish I could look at this story for the first time all over again just relive the shock moments. 

You will NOT regret reading this story. I would sell my soul for more chapters, but man this author got me YEARNING for these characters AGHJJJJJJ. 

Literally this story had me SWOONING

✨ Letters to a Ruined King by @ zetsumyona (on AO3)

18+, mature, 

another pirate AU that has me having heart eyes over captain hongjoong tho he hasn’t done a lot yet in this story. I

t is marked as an ateez x reader, tho granted they can always throw surprises at us but my assumption is that any member is game LOL. this series is also Mature and 18+ btw. 

It’s got great worldbuilding, portrayal of emotions, and it’s been fun to guess how each relationship is gonna go.

But the level of depth they’ve given the characters is crazy, and you don’t know what to expect next

it’s definitely an interesting take on a pirate AU

✨ You Belong to Us by @teeztheflag

18+, mature, ot8!werewolf ateez x werewolf!reader

about four parts right now, but man I love this fic. I think why I always liked werewolf!aus is the found family vibe but also the soulmate vibe and I always love re-reading it because it makes me so curious about their dynamics.

✨ Der Damonen Klan by @teeztheflag

18+, mature, demon au, poly teez

this was the first fic I found on their page and I love it. It' just such a vibe and I'm such a fan of ot8!fics because they're so entertaining and seeing the dynamics of each relationship (but also lowkey having people interested in you woohoo what fun). The storyline here I really like too because the MC is still trying to figure out what works and how she feels about them and the like. hehe.

✨ Blood Masquerade by @hongism

M/18+, fem!reader x tba, smut, violence

So ofc it's Miss Caly herself so obviously it's amazing. It actually mimics a dating simulator so she'd have choices after each chapter. and man this story is so immersive and I love how the MC is such a badass and isn't letting the boys win her over so easy, and although there's only 2 chapters so far, its stunning. The best part is you don't know what to expect since it's a twist on dating simulators and it's just so good, I cannot wait for more parts.

✨ catlike by @ maganxx (AO3)

witch au 

san gets turned into reader’s familiar and I’m about halfway thru it but it’s so good!!! It just finished I think.

✨ Kiss of Chaos by @ tenelkadjo (AO3)

Here’s the tumblr link as I’ve learned recently they’re also on tumblr @tenelkadjowrites

NSFW

another witch au

THE WAY I WAS OBSESSED WITH THIS THE STORY IS SO COOL AND THERE’S SMUT AND WORLDBUILDING AND AHHHHH

Seonghwa x reader

literally I wish they would write one shots with each member because I think it would be so cool (please write one about Fae Hongjoong I might lose my mind) !!!!!!! And Seonghwa is such a hottie in this too!!!!!!

-------

One shots! One’s that are NSFW are labelled but please read the further content readings when you go to the post.

✨ Can’t Stand You by @domjaehyun 

NSFW, HJ x reader

basically HJ is bad boy and reader is good student, and they get paired together

✨ 5 weeks by @ zetsumyona (on AO3)

NSFW

strangers to lovers, colleagues to lovers, smut, there is an age gap btw (the reader is older)

idol!wooyoung x fem-stylist!reader

✨ Can’t take my eyes off of you by @bobateastay

NSFW

san x reader

70s college au, boy next door san, smut

✨ Take me home pt 1 by @yeosanghwas

NSFW

wooyoung x reader

THIS WSS SO GOOD WTF, it gets so heated in the best of ways

sub!wooyoung, softdom!reader, smut, frenemies to lovers, college au, fluff

✨ hop hop little bunny by @bngchnsi

NSFW

yeosang x reader

when I read this for the first time I about died thank you very much

brat tamer!yeosang x brat!reader

✨ A Fever You Can’t Sweat Out by to_shinestar (AO3)

NSFW

wooyoung x san x reader

!!! the iconic duo!!

this literally got ME sweating

✨ The House of Eden by @ faerbloom (AO3)

literally the softest thing I ever read

this is a very wholesome fic and just makes me wanna live in the woods with my lovers as a witch like wtf

ot8 x reader

✨ Room for Three by @honeyhotteoks 

NSFW

yunho x reader x seonghwa

a duo I didn’t think I needed

there’s a second part too

this fic is literally so good i was SWOONING!!!!! just the dynamics and everything got me SCREECHING if they made a whole series of this I would go feral please and thank you

[whomstress]

She can handle it (Jax x Ragatha)

Yet another fic while my hyperfixation is still on high!

Ragatha standing up for herself. Jax being a simp but only in private.

Again human au!

“Ragatha.” Zooble said, “You can’t be serious.” They said this, staring incredulously at the doll-like girl. Who was avoiding eye contact, letting out a simple hmmm? As if she didn’t know exactly what they were talking about.

Still avoiding their gaze, she tried to defend her actions by saying, “He said he was lonely.”

“I’m sure.”

“He asked nicely!”

Zooble rolled their eyes hard enough that Ragatha could feel its intensity. “Be serious.”

The red head nervously played with her curls. “Well, he did say please without sounding too sarcastic, so it was kind of nice.”

“You always let him step all over you, Rags.”

“Not always!" She fumbled.

"Ragatha, he is literally putting his legs over your shoulders while you sit on the floor right now! Why do you even give him a chance?”

“That’s 'cause she’s different from you, bozos.” She looks up to see him finally bend over from his relaxing position on the couch. They ask Cain, with an assortment of other things, to make for a sleepover in Zooble’s room tonight. Face as close as it can get to her while looking into her eyes with a wide yellow smile stretched across his face, almost predatory. "Right, sweetie doll?"

She feels herself gulp as his purple, soft-like rabbit hair tickles her face, and his triangle pupils and smile sharpen.

“Jesus, can you not pick on her for two seconds? She doesn’t even like you.” Zooble said, getting Jax’s attention. He looks up at their eyes, farrowing, but his usual cocky smile fills his face as he moves to rest his arms on Ragatha’s head, squishing her down more with his weight.

“HeY!” She says with a glare that she finally got annoyed enough to knock his arms off his head, only to practically slam his chin against the top of her head and wrap his arms around her neck in revenge.

“What do you mean? She loves me! Everyone does!” He said he was holding her tight as she tried to wiggle herself out from underneath him.

Zooble doesn’t really like getting in the middle of their stupid fights; they honestly don’t want to get in the middle of anything here. But between knocking off Gangle’s happy mask and laughing at almost everyone's karaoke tonight, almost because the jerk just happened to mostly not talk while Ragatha was singing, but instantly made up for it when he threw a fake centipede at her. Even if Gangle did, she kind of deserves to be haggled with her anime opening. All in all, this night was actually supposed to be relaxing for once, and he was finally getting on the last of their nerves.

They grab Jax by the arms and hoist them off Ragatha, tossing them the other way towards the door. He rubs his head and juts out his lip, pretending pouts at Zooble’s reaction: “AWW jealous, I’m not giving you enough attention tonight, Potato head?”

“You’re pathetic. You think you're so funny, but the truth is, no one thinks you're funny; no one cares. God, sometimes I wish if any of us could escape from this hell hole, it’d be you, just to never see that stupid smile again.” They closed in on him and practically spit in his face, “No one wanted you here tonight. That’s why you had to beg the only person you knew who couldn't say no to anyone. No one wants you at all.”

His smile had turned into a grimace at this point and his yellow eyes into dangerous slits, but unlike Ragatha, Zobble didn’t phaze Zobble for a moment. “Please. No one?”

“No one.” They repeated. And Jax finally looked around the room at everyone awkwardly, avoiding eye contact. His eyes landed on Ragatha, and she looked back a moment, then, with a small frown, looked away as well.

He was silent, finally letting his face rest for a moment before he scoffed, threw the door open, and said, “De todas formas, sois unos cabezas de @#$% molestos.” Slamming the door

“Good riddance!” Zooble finally said he was sitting on the bed. They looked over at Ragatha, who was staring at the door, and rolled their eyes. “I’m not apologizing. He deserved it.”

“I know. You shouldn’t have to.” She knew Zooble didn’t really care about how she felt bad for Jax.

“You shouldn’t either.” They say. Ragatha nods, but Zooble sighs and pinches her arm with her claw hand, soft enough to only hurt a medium amount. She yelled and looked back at Zooble, who gave Ragatha a serious look. “I mean it. I know what you're thinking. ‘He spoke Spanish; he must be really upset!’ It doesn't matter if he is. He was mean to everyone tonight, and he really did you dirty. I know you care about him, for whatever reason. But don’t you dare let him make this your fault, got it?”

It came out more of a threat than advice, and Ragatha just nodded with a guilty smile. She knew where Zooble was coming from, and for what it was worth, it actually meant a lot that they were standing so much up for her even after all the apathy they gained over all these years.

“Good. Now go comfort your dumb@#*”, and if you even bring him near my room, I will lock you in both of yours for a week.” Ragatha smiled and hugged them, and before they pinched her again, she headed off with a wave to everyone.

“You’re just going to let her go?” Pomni said, looking worriedly at the door.

“She’s a big girl; she’s tougher than she looks. She can handle herself. If anyone can really give it to that *#$hole, it’s her. It just sometimes needs a little push.”

Zooble then brought out some crazy-looking liquid that made the others almost gag. “What’s that?” Gaggle said with a sniff.

“The closest thing in this hell hole to getting me wasted. If anyone needs me. Don’t.”

Ragatha went out into the hall, only stopping a second before ringing his doorbell, “Jax?”. She rang it again and still didn’t get a response but heard a sound like shifting on a bed: ”Please come out.” Once again, she rang and heard a heavy sigh this time. He was definitely in there, so she held the bell a bit longer this time. “Ja-”

The door flung open, and he was in her space so fast she had to take a step back. “What?"

He looked angry, but his hair was a mess, like he’d been angrily ruffling with it. He seemed annoyed that she was taking so long to answer before she moved a little more in his space, bushing a stray lock out of his face, and softly said, “You look so tired, Jax.”

He paused for a moment, flinching away from her touch, before sighing, an almost invisible lavender blush forming on his mix of brown and purple skin. He relaxed and rolled his eyes, saying, “Jesus, I’m not dying, doll face,” and pulled back, walking in his somewhat messy, dark room. Using a lazy hand, he waved at her to follow him in. “Close the door, would ya? It’s getting cold.”

Which was of course untrue, but she smiled, closing the door softly behind her and locking it before turning on the light and following him to his bed. He watched her as she organized some stuff on his table and once again rolled his eyes.

His room wasn’t even that dirty, besides some dust and sloppily laid items around. He barely was in there, so he didn’t see the need to keep it spotless like her room. But if Ragatha was anything, she was a creature of order and habit. She liked to clean the little weirdo, and despite how weird it was to let anyone touch his stuff, he did have to admit he liked actually being able to find things the second he wanted them.

Getting annoyed at her lack of attention, he grabbed her by the waist and flipped her over so he could have her on top of the bed. “Are gonna just clean, or are you here to make up for earlier?”

She frowned at hearing Zooble’s words repeat in her head about not letting him blame her. “Don’t give me that. You were too much tonight, and you know it!”

Surprised for a moment, she instantly pushed back instead of waiting until he taunted her. He scoffed and looked away, only to feel her cross her arms under him, effectively stopping him from pressing any closer. He groaned at this, flipping over to the other side of the bed. “All of you are so annoying. Why do I even put up with you?”

“We could say the same thing.” She has smart backs.

Ragatha gave it to him when they were alone. He asked why once, and she said something dumb about not wanting to fight in front of other people. He did kind of like it, though; she only showed this little rebel side to him. Made him feel special or whatever, not that he’s ever told her.

“Yeah, yeah. Join the club.”

Despite him causally blowing it off, his body was still obviously tense, and his foot was thumping hard against the bed. She looked at him, and her face softened. She moved closer, so she was leaning over him. “You could say sorry.” He raised an eyebrow in a sarcastic way. “I know you feel bad.”

He scoffed and turned his head. “Not in their dreams.”

“What about me?” She said that, and he flinched again. Only eyes moving to look at her from the corner of his eye with a tight-lipped frown on his face.

“No.” He said it like a stubborn child.

She rolled her eyes. “Really?” He huffed in response, and she decided to bring out the big guns. She moved so she could softly move his face to look at her and rub her nose with his. “Please, bunny?”

His eyes widened, and he almost pushed her away if his hands weren’t shaking from his heart, nearly jumping out of his chest. He never knew how to react when she did stuff like this. For as long as it took him to admit he had any type of feelings for her, long after they regularly made out, he finally figured out what it was about her that made him crack like no one else.

She was soft. Not only physically, despite how much he loved her almost plush tan skin. But in her words for him, the movements she made around him, the way her lips pressed into his He loved it. He loved…

Plush lips brushed against his, ghosting but not quite touching. Soft. “Please.” She says it with hooded eyes. Soft. But she still refused to move closer or let him, until he apologized. She pressed fully against him and weaved a hand in his hair, gently rubbing his scalp, and his breath hitched. Soft.

With one more failed attempt to fill the gap, he finally gave in. “Please,” he almost begged. “I’m sorry.”

She smiled and cooed, “That’s my bunny.” Finally, by filling the space between them and connecting them where they desperately needed

Soft

Her lips press into his, moving almost painfully slowly.

Soft

His hand cupped her face and the other followers her curves.

Soft

Her slightly frizzy red lock brushed against her forehead, tickling it like a kiss.

So.

Damn.

Soft.

He was melting into it, and for once in his life, he doesn’t care about being manipulated like putty in someone’s hands. As long as it was her.

Suddenly, her lips broke from his with a small pop. “Will you say sorry to everyone in the morning?"

He tried to fight, but she pressed a barely there kiss, setting another spark, and said, "Whatever you want, dollface.”

She smiles and presses back into him. He’s so glad they don’t need to sleep because he was going to make sure they were busy all night.

In the morning, he grumply apologizes to everyone at the table, and as the newest of them, Pomni looks in shock as he sits down next to Ragatha, who is smiling widely at him. "I told you she could handle it.” Zooble says they are rolling their eyes. "God, do they have to be so obvious about it, though?" While nearly gagging at the bruises littering their necks.

[bluexiao]

#the memory of you (chapter three)

—it all starts when you saw someone who looked like someone you know in a game, only to come to know that it was him all along 

—(or) scaramouche gets transported to Earth and you have become a part of his story 

THEMES. reversed isekai; self aware!scaramouche; crack, angst, open ending 

WARNINGS. mentions of his real name; may have curses from reader and scara; may have spoilers from the 3.3 interlude quest; mentioned wanderer’s voicelines to fit the narrative

WORD COUNT. 1.3k words

NOTES. this wouldn’t probably make sense if you haven’t read the 2 previous chapters but you do you. also, thank you to summer irl for beta reading this and sharing ideas also! she was the one who came up with the main plot it’s her big brains era

The Memory of You; Beginning, Mean, End 

“I wish I’d never been born at all” 

That was the thought that remained in SCARAMOUCHE’s mind when he had entered the Iminsul, and it had granted his wish. 

But in a different way than he could’ve ever expected. 

Standing in the middle of a pavement–markings he could not recognize and surroundings so unlike the ones he had ever seen. He had traveled to all of the lands of Teyvat, but never had he encountered such gigantic glass buildings and weirdly shaped lights and… are those carts? Carts with glasses, shaped like windows–what is it? Is it a new invention by someone from Fontaine that he had no idea of? 

He restricts himself from speaking as he silently observes his surroundings; it was dark, stars nowhere to be found and not a single person around, high signages at the same height as the buildings, filled with words he could read but does not understand its purpose, and faces of people that he could tell from a glance is quite odd for someone–or anyone from Teyvat could ever do. 

He must be in another world. 

┌───────── ·  ·  ·  · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

It was December, and you were freezing. 

“Can’t believe you’re still playing that game, Y/n. And all for one character!” 

You scoffed with a laugh, eyes strained on the screen display as you replied to the microphone of your earplugs, “Funny. Says the one who’s waiting for Ayato’s rerun banner just because she first played right after his first one.” 

“Hey! That’s foul!” you could hear your friend shout over the receiver, which only caused you to laugh even more. 

“Poor you. Now, I can get Scaramouche but you still don’t have your Yashiro Commissioner.” 

“Hmp! I want to say you won’t get your Scara today but you even loaded a bunch of genesis crystals for him. Your dedication outranks any Scara simp I know.” 

“I’m probably the only Scara simp you know, dumbass,” you pull away and lean onto your seat, eyes closing and sighing heavily. 

It was time.��

“So? You got him?” 

“Not yet,” you say, once again opening your eyes and clicking the Wish button–a single pull, and next, and then another one. 

“How much pity are you in now?” 

“Uh… pretty sure I’m on 40. Oh my god-” 

“What? What?!” 

“It’s gold! Oh fuck… I got him…” 

“You got him?!” 

“Yeah… I got him.” 

“Well, isn’t that a good thing?” 

┌───────── ·  ·  ·  · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

“It’s so weird…” 

“Why? What’s weird?” your friend caught on just as she hears your weak voice. “Is this about the story or you? I haven’t finished the quest yet though so I might not have any idea what you’re going to say.”

“Yeah, there’s this constant headache I get just from playing this patch. I think I should log off but…” your eyes drift to the screen and as if you expected someone to return your gaze, they land on Scaramouche’s back, leaving him idle in the meantime. 

“Then you should rest! Y/n, it’s not good for your health to force yourself.” 

“Yeah…” you absentmindedly mutter, only to ignore what your friend’s voice was saying, along with your mind, leaning forward and pressing on the profile button, seeing Scaramouche’s face along with the rest of his profile. You head on to his Profile and click on his Voicelines, only finding a few as you haven’t really leveled your Friendship with him yet. 

Click. 

“You want me to introduce myself? I've gone by many names and titles during my journey. Although each one is more eminent than any ordinary mortal could imagine, they're all just water under the bridge to me now. Call me whatever you like. Go ahead, let me see what you can come up with. Don't disappoint me.”

“Mouche, you said your name is Mouche, right? Like legit? That’s a pretty unique name,”

Your voice echoed in your mind–or was it really? How can you not even remember uttering such words nor to who you uttered them, and when exactly? 

Your eyes trail up to the screen, searing pain in the side of your head palpitating still, urging you to press and massage with your  hand over them, in hopes of easing the ache even for a bit. 

Pretty purple eyes–one that you swear you might have seen somewhere with someone else. In this world, however, such a thing is rare, and you’ve never really met anyone with purple eyes–probably cosplayers, but why is it that no matter how you rack your mind for something or someone, you could not find it. 

“You and I have crossed paths in the past, but our journeys will eventually diverge. Who knows what will happen next? Let's just wait and see.”

His voice echoes in your mind, almost as if it is something you’ve heard before. 

Of course, you’ve heard of this character’s voice before, you’ve played for quite a while and he had also appeared in a lot of quests, especially in the Sumeru Archon Quest. But…

Nevermind. 

You chose to ignore your aches as you went through each and every single voiceline of his that you can unlock and before you know it… 

“Wait, I can… hear them without unlocking?” you stopped in your tracks right after accidentally clicking on one of the locked voice lines. 

Shrugging to yourself, thinking it probably was just a glitch, you went on and tried to hear the rest of the locked voice lines, smiling to yourself at how you could possibly be so lucky on encountering such a glitch–it’s better to do them now that the company still haven’t noticed and fixed it yet. It didn’t seem to be something that big of an issue though, you might be able to see YouTube or TikTok videos later on about how they experienced the same glitch. 

Unbeknownst to you, however, no one else did. 

There was no glitch at all. 

At least, none that was caused by the game itself. 

┌───────── ·  ·  ·  · ꒰⚘݄꒱₊

It was like fluttering his eyes open in the middle of cold water and rising from the depths of the sea to reach the light and inhale a large chunk of breath, burning his throat but awakening his lungs. 

It was like that when he came back to his own world—he who was called Mouche, was The Balladeer and Kunikuzushi, but now… nothing. No one. He is no one. 

As he stared at the empty, dark skies, rain blurring his eyes as it got stuck to his lashes, clothes drenched by the never-ending storm, he who has had many names do not remember anything. 

“Where… am I?” 

Surprised by his own voice, he blinks away from the doom of the heavens and looks around to land his purple eyes right upon each of the trees, the bushes, and everything that he could see under the haze of the misty weather. He was but a man, a blank slate, no name, an empty mind. 

Who am I?

The words die down in his throat with a question that held no answers. 

Then it came: the voice–one voice. 

“Who are you?” (it came, weak but clear enough for him to assume that it was coming from somewhere near him)

“Someone who knows you very well.” (but apparently, it wasn’t, as he hears his own voice without him even speaking–it was all in his head.) 

Whoever the other voice was, it was the one that urged him to stand up and breathe again–take in the air after unknowingly holding his breath. 

He might be an empty slate, but this voice (your voice) filled the gaps of his craving to know, to find the memories that he had lost–his memories of you. 

fin

reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated ♡

taglist on reblogs!

[ringdabel]

My thoughts on OP ships except I’m being 100% honest (P.3)

SLIGHT SPOILERS FOR THE HEROINES ONE PIECE NOVEL

*LawBepo

- I don’t know about you but to me I’m neutral about it, if you ship this, good for you! If you don’t then okay!

- I do think it’s a cute ship though with their interactions, relationship between the two, etc..

- And it actually MAKE SENSE

- Like hear me out, Law would actually marry a polar bear because of how much of a freak he is and considering he’s a pirate, he wouldn’t care if other people think it’s weird, at least he has his fluffy boyfriend.

- I draw these two a lot in my sketchbooks, like every single one just HAD to have Law and Bepo together or else those sketchbooks are not mine

- he has a soft spot for Bepo, definitely Bepo. He hates everyone and everyone but his crew, Corazon and BEPO.

-In the SBS, Oda did tell us about how Law met Bepo (with Penguin and Shachi), at that time Law was a kid along with the three others so that means Law and Bepo knew each other since they were children and are super close.

- FUNFACT : You know how Law hates Umeboshi right? Well Bepo likes eating it with onigiri pretty much! I like to imagine that if someone ever gift Law some onigiri with umeboshi inside, he will give them to Bepo.

*Smoshigi

- Small girl with her gigantic DILF (idk what that means but I think it’s fitting).

- it’s the size difference isn’t it?

- I like their chemistry a lot! It’s pretty cute in my opinion.

- for some people, a 10 year age gap is too much (Shigi is 23, Smoky is 36, so that means it’s 13 year age gap then) but they’re both adults so I guess it’s legal? I mean Rayleigh and his wife has a 10 year age gap and they’re old now-

- this might be controversial but… Smoshigi is better than Zoshigi or Lawshigi in my PERSONAL OPINION.

Zoro is confirmed to have no interest in women by Oda and for Law i don’t think he’d date her or even taken interest in her in general.

(I telling all this like a hater I’m so sorry I don’t mean to sound like one DDDX!! If you ship Zoshigi or Lawshigi it’s totally fine and valid! It’s just my opinion!)

*Sanami

- MY FAV SHIP!!!!! I love them so much they’re so cute!!! <3333333333

- Theres this one part of the OP stage actors and actresses like an event or something?? And I saw a video of these two where basically Sanji is being a simp as always, drops on one knee and like hold out his hand to Nami

Nami holds his hand then blows him a kiss!!!!! IT MADE HIM STARTED BREAKDANCING ITS HONESTLY SO CUTE AGSHSVHSHSHSHWHHSHW

- They’re the DEFINITION of GIRLBOSS MALEWIFE FRFR!!! No 🧢!!!!!!

- wait did I already put this ship in part 1 or part 2? Man idc anymore I just genuinely LOVE this ship!! If it becomes canon I will become happy! (Even though it’s highly unlikely it’s fine!)

- I just love their moments together you know? When I was young I always wanted the two of them to kiss a lot, I have never change at all 😈

- Like look at the sad French man! How can you not kiss him!?!?!?! He makes you desserts you really like, compliments and swoons at you everyday, cooks for you, loves you for who you are, patient and will listen to you whenever you have a bad day, shows affection to you, a gentleman, IN A SUIT, ALSO WEARS AN APRON AS WELL, Respects you, etc… etc… he’s the only French I like <333/j

- They’re also both good with kids and have a soft spot for them! Oda stated that if Nami is ever kind to someone it’s women and Children, for Sanji he always has a motherly nature surrounding him, his interactions with the DK crew proves this!!!

- AGH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!!! IM DYING!!!

*KozaVivi

- a HUGGGGEEE fan of childhood friends to lovers trope <3333333333

- I love these two a lot, I ship them a lot TOO! I want them to have more interactions!

- in the Heroines novel, I just love Vivi’s episode with Koza and the love letter (NO CONTEXT HEHEHE 😈) it’s so so so SOOO sweet it’s giving me diabetes

Like it’s so funny, full of sweetness and wholesomeness! I love them!

- I wish these two would be canon… if not it’s fine as well… because I have another ship up my sleeve… *takes out hand*

[enriquemzn262]

What are some western cartoons you've enjoyed?

Amphibia

A fun western take of Isekai, without the wish fulfillment escapism that plagues Isekai, which was actually criticized with the character of Marcy, with a lovable cast, great animation and a well made story with a bittersweet yet satisfying ending.

Hilda

The best modern cartoon period, a cozy and sweet yet action packed and even sometimes dark adventure show about a little girl exploring her magical realism world.

Gravity Falls

Not nearly as fantastic as everyone and their mom claims to be, but still a great show, with tons of good characters, excellent animation, and an overarching plot that while ultimately flawed (the second half of season 2 really dropped the ball on that one) was still great.

She-Ra

Great solid show from beginning to end, but especially towards the end when the silly princess stuff finally began to be properly integrated with the actual plot. Also Catra best character don’t @ me.

Kipo

The most underrated modern cartoon I’ve seen, a superb show with a great story, characters and a truly unique setting, not to mention it did the whole villain redemption thing everyone and their mom was doing at the time, but actually did it fantastically.

Invincible

Like many others I was drawn in by the brutality of the first episode, and boy did it just keep getting better after it! Just skip everything with Amber in it, and you should be in for the best animated superhero show since JLU.

Arcane

Love it! From beginning to end it was a wild ride of a show, and this is coming from someone that only knows about LoL through memes and porn. At times it almost felt like I was watching an extended movie.

The Amazing World of Gumball

This has to be the funniest modern show there is, at least before they decided to use a ton of “funny faces”, when it went down to being among the funniest. Still, a love letter to animation, featuring just about every style of it there is, and with an extremely weird yet fun cast of characters.

Before jumping back to anime I used to watch a ton of these, so I’m sure there’s more, but these are on too of my head and from the last decade, but I can honestly tell you, that my favorite cartoon of all time is:

Courage the Cowardly Dog

There’s just not a single bad episode in it, and every character has been as memorable as Courage himself.

Dishonorable mentions:

The Owl House: Amphibia but actually embracing the bad of Isekai.

Steven Universe: Started weird, got good but ultimately fell down the stairs due to its terrible obsession with finding good things about terrible people.

OK KO: Garbage character models and too obsessed with making references.

Adventure Time: Everything wrong with modern animation.

Regular Show: Modercai is a simp and just looking at the guy gives me cringe.

Bee and Puppycat: Everything wrong with AT and SU COMBINED.

Korra: Not canon

[streaminn]

Twin anon here!

I think the council of anons is incredibly funny. I’m just gonna forever imagine us all sitting at a round table or something dhdhhd

on the moderates for streamer enid note I do think my theory would die then :( definitely be more aware of what siblings Enid had. I mean I think it was said before that Endespairs fandom knew she had a bunch of brothers so the closer my twin theory is to enid the more it kinda collapses.

Also because I’m here- I never realized how sad the twin theory was till he pointed it out. Like oh my god that is devastating. Like imagine the twin you have marrying your idol that’s actually so horrifying. (It’s also a good fanfic idea for a cheating au…)

NAWH BC

Enid spent three years attached to Wednesday, going through all kinds of shit together and you're telling me-

One break, just two years of far apart so they can build their own lives and Wednesday gets married to enid's twin

Girl would be devastated. Obviously you aren't entitled to someone's feelings but Enid, who most likely has a more successful twin in terms of wolfing out and thus better connections to the birth family- holy shit, she'll be bitter. She'll wonder, what is it like, to have everything she wanted. Everything she needed. A family, better treatment and her mate.

She wonders what's it like to see them dead

Its not even an idol thing either twin anon! I like to think, Enid genuinely loves Wednesday at this point and like, it'll probably hurt to see someone get so close so easily. But she'll accept it, she's Wednesday's best friend, she needs to accept it.

And when she stands in the altar, in the wrong side of the platform, she will clasp a hand so dangerously close to her twins neck and whisper a congratulations before Wednesday walks down the aisle.

Can you blame Enid, for closing her eyes for just a moment and wishing that Wednesday was walking to her?

The toast afterwards is essentially a confession. She spills her whole feelings, of the gratitude and the greatfulness and the love she has for Wednesday. She waxes it with waving hands and trembling fingers. Wednesday is smiling at her throughout this and it hurts bc her hand is on someone else's and not hers.

Nobody reads it more than a clingy bestfriend who most likely can't spend more time with the other now. Nobody sees the shine of tears barely hidden back and theres a tremble to the glass she's holding when she finishes.

By the end of the whole thing, Enid hugs Wednesday like it was their very first time. It's tight, just like how Wednesday wanted and the sigh that she earns from that has Enid free falling back into how in love she is with Wednesday.

But, it isn't reciprocated and so she pulls back and the tears are spilling. Wednesday chuckles and wipes it away with such softness and care that was once only theirs.

She says, "I love you too, Enid." she sees the love, yes but she is blind for she doesn't see how willing Enid is to die for her. She doesn't see the regret of pushing for the necessary space between them, she doesn't see- she doesn't know that werewolves mate for life.

Enid smiles and savors the eyes of her love. She traces the skin on Wednesday's face, the dip of her dimple and gives a single kiss to Wednesday's forehead. It isn't enough, it's never enough but Enid can't be selfish so she pulls away.

She walks out of the event and Wednesday's life with such ease that it leaves her gasping down a block away.

Enid feels like a ghost since that day onward, untethered and lost in the world.

Idt streamer Enid would exist at this point if the twin thing were true 😭 she'd prob just be a movie reviewer like the og concept of sin. If she ever does become Endespair, she'll probably have a more sarcastic and melachony vibe to the streams. Not alot of Wednesday simping, just cold analytics and if you're a Lil delulu, fondness in her tone.

Didn't expect it to turn into a whole ass drabble but I'm feeling angst so I hope yall liked it.

[skyland2703]

Now that I have access to good quality pictures of The Coinless #1, I believe I can give it a proper review~

SO LET'S GET STARTED!!

I'm gonna start with saying the art here was fucking gorgeous. And I’m not gonna cover the basic points, too many people already have. Just lil things that held MY attention, knowing all the plot twists and spoilers~

Does this mean Drakkon DID have public executions in the street??

Bulk/Kim crumbs!!! Bulk is such a Simp man. OHHH

and and and— he tells Skull everything. Every part of his day. And I think skull hears, Skull understands.

This might get a little out of order now, but

It’s so sad the way she sits here bundled up like this. It also melts my heart. And she misses Zack So MUCH. And the guilt is swallowing her whole.

SHE IS NOT YOURS—

You know what I’d be up to kill him too if I were in this world.

ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE MOMENT OTP DOUBLE TEAMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!! Please I love THIS SO MUCH.

Bro deserved this shot ngl.

…now why do you have this stowed away like this, huh jason? Are we keeping the trauma like a trophy?? Are you going to wear that when you leave your little recluse’s hut???

Untreated PTSD made worse by more incoming trauma. This guy got so fucked up and yet he finds a way for ME to be annoyed at HIM.

Baby. Baby. Babyyyyyyy. Ultimate himbo Simp. BBY!!

These women are in LOVE by the way. For the record. Just so you know. And every single scene they had deserved a post of its own because HHHHH

But this one in particular. They’re SOFT but they’re pretending to be so tough. They just need a HUG. That’ll fix like 99.9% problems.

Also does anyone remember what did happen to the scorpina of that universe??

This is so funny to me and I don’t even know why

Iconic shot. Could hear the BONK noise in the background.

Glad finster got this moment. Even if it was short lived~

Zack what are. You. Trying. To. Achieve. Why does he keep calling her out like this?? Like he's ridiculing her for what happened to HIM?! WHAT. IS. THIS.

Also does this mean we get lava zombie kim???

HE SAID HIS NAME HE SAID HIS NAME HE SAID—

oh he betrayed them.

oH buLk is hurt.

aSDFGH

Like i said, the art was GORGEOUS. Drakkon was annoying as fuck. I needed to punch him in every single shot he was in.

This feels like a potential redemption arc for him, and I don’t LIKE IT. I don’t like redemption arcs. 99.9% of them. They’re almost never done right.

Obviously, this COULD be something really good, but I feel like

Also the fact that all of the characters not explicitly mentioned are all zombies now saddens me beyond explanation. It somehow kills scope for fanfiction to me?

But on the bright side, Bulk’s development is some of the best of the BEST. He’s the glue that’s holding the team together, he’s also the guy who thought he’d never get this, the underdog, the guy who thinks he doesn’t deserve any of this, and yet, and yet in every interaction of the team, he shines through. He’s the one who’s holding them all together, even though his own world— aka skull— is collapsing.

and i hope we get more development for him.

And please please PLEASE can we have everyone turn back to normal when this shit ends?! These people need a goddamn break.

[gojonanami]

Lovely Sab,

Nanami is not my ult (even though he’s a wonderful character, I’m just not attracted to him), but I have this idea that’s been floating in my head around for a while which I think you and all those who ‘simp’ Nanami might enjoy:

Big Dog CEO Reader x her very dedicated & caring employee Nanamin (CFO? Head of Financial Department?)

oh my god, you know what's funny, my sugar daddy nanami fic is basically the opposite of this (reader is a executive assistant who is going to night school and nanamin is a CFO)

but i love this concept a lot - it reminds me of a manga i read (18+) where an heir to a company falls for her assistant - its very very cute <3

[justanisabelakinnie]

Fandom Lesbophobia

No but the way fandom treats lesbianism, whether canon lesbian characters or characters headcanoned as lesbians, or ships involving lesbians(whether canon or fanon) is fucking whack. 

Whenever a female character is canonically confirmed to be a lesbian, “fans” will always go the whole nine yards in trying to prove that the character is bi; they’ll always headcanon the character as bi and ship them with men. If you politely tell them that the character is a lesbian they’ll snap at you and call you biphobic or say there’s no proof of that or that “everyone can have their headcanons regardless” not when it’s actively erasing a canon sexuality being represented, ya dipshits. I can’t think of a single gay female character I’ve seen that hasn’t been called bi or even straight or had their sexuality dismissed by being shipped with men: Apple White, Tomoyo Daidouji, Robin Buckley, Amity Blight, Velma Dinkley, the list goes on and on. 

Even when the character isn’t canonically a lesbian but is headcanoned as such people seem super against it and will be super bothered by it for some reason. Like they’ll always ask you “why” you hc the character as a lesbian and say “but she could be bi!” And yeah, she could, but what’s so wrong with me seeing her as a lesbian? Why not just make your own post about the character being bi? And then they’ll go on to derail your post by talking about how much they ship the female character with a man. Why are you so offended at the possibility of a female character not being attracted to men? Why do all women have to be available to men, even in fiction? 

Imo people seem to hate lesbian headcanons the most, even compared to other headcanons. It’s as if a female character being unattracted to men completely intimidates them and/or is something they can’t comprehend, whether it’s canon or not. Just looking at the Encanto TikTok, when it comes to queer headcanons, fans on there seem to hate the lesbian Isabela one the most. And no, I’m not talking about Colombians who don’t want the message of the movie to be erased, I’m talking about people who simply don’t like the headcanon because they are homophobic/lesbophobic. Maybe it’s just me being an Isabela simp and looking at more content of Isabela and since I’m a lesbian the headcanon I tend to look at the most is Isabela being a lesbian as well(especially since I also have the headcanon myself), but I see it all the time, even more so than hatred for Mirabel being bi or Camilo being genderfluid even though the latter is possibly the most baseless. 

Like I am so sick of people getting mad at others for headcanoning Isabela as a lesbian and using Bubo as an excuse even though his character is a rough draft and not canon. And it’s funny as well because most people don’t even like Bubo. Bring him up to an Encanto fan and they’ll instantly say they dislike him. But suddenly you want him to be with Isabela because it’s still better than Isabela being a lesbian. I even saw someone’s account receive death threats, attacks, and hatred just because they headcanoned Isabela as a lesbian, and it culminated in them taking down all their Isabela lesbian content and uploading an apology video instead, and all the comments were saying “it’s okay I forgive you now that you understand” WHAT?! So you only feel bad that she received hate because she no longer has the headcanon? It’s fine for her to receive death threats as long as she does have it though because she deserves it for thinking a fictional fucking female character isn’t attracted to men. Fucking sickening. 

Don’t even get me started on how much more popular slash generally is compared to femslash. Because as we all know if a relationship doesn’t have men at its center then it’s not worth paying attention to and not to mention people will attack you for having the ship all the time as well. Even if it is canon don’t think that will stop fandom from tearing the ship apart and pairing one or both characters with boys. Alternatively very often slash pairers will only ship f/f ships to get them out of the way of their slash ship, and I’ve seen a lot of fics while looking for a femslash pair that I want that are tagged as such but only have that relationship in the background/as secondary. And the main and “foreground” ship is always an m/m ship every. single. time. This post goes into it in more detail so that I don’t have to, but the point is made that it’s so upsetting because this all directly stems from centering of men in society as well as fandom. idk it just frustrates me. And I wish this was acknowledged more. 

TLDR: I’m tired, please just respect lesbian characters more in fiction and let people have their lesbian headcanons and ships, that is all. Lesbians deserve better. 

[oddballwriter]

Big Top Burger & Zomburger Relationship HC

Summary: What I think the Big Top Burger and Zomburger characters are like in a relationship

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol & bars, and the possible undead

Author’s Snip: I got into Big Top Burger again, and I want to expand out of just writing for Slenderverse. And also because some of these characters are real cute and just wanna think about how they’d be in a relationship.

Notes: I’m excluding Steve because... he’s just weird. I don’t think he could really be normal if he tried. I don’t think anyone is simping for the clown man so I think it’s fine. Also, this is the only Bigtop and Zomburger post I have so far, if you like my writing then feel free to request something, so long as you read the rules and boundaries for my blog first.  

I’ll shut up now. Enjoy!

꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦

Penny

MILF /j

No, I’m just yanking your chain a bit

She is really cute and she’s implied to be a mother 

I think it’s actually confirmed by WorthiKids that the little girl we see in the s1 credits and s2 intro is her daughter

We don’t know if she’s a single mother but for the sake of this post I’ll just have it that she is

So as a single parent its inherent that she needs time to take care of her daughter along with work so she might not have a lot of times for dates

I feel like she’s one to enjoy simple dates like the movies or a small night out 

She’s so sweet and polite I love her so much aaa

Obviously there’s a bit of a requirement and need for you to be looking for a serious relationship and that you’ll remain since she’d most likely want someone good to stay for the sake of her daughter and her

She would be sooo happy if you took quickly to being some type of figure in her daughter’s life 

She seems like she’d give you cheek kisses regularly

Love is stored in the Penny /hj 

Billie

She’s definitely a chill hang out date kind of person 

You guys would hang out at her place and listen to some music or watch  movies that she has 

Billie is pretty monotone and tired sounding when she speaks and I feel like in a way that’s charming 

Depending on your personality, you might be the one with the energy in the relationship

She just feels so laid back and chill , Idk what else to say, she just seems so cool

She’d totally tell you about all the weird things that she’s seen while on the job at Big Top

Tim

He has such a buddy buddy vibe outside of work and that it peaks through a bit while on the job as you watch the series 

He’d take you on the typical dates but I feel like he enjoys going to bars with you every once in a while to get some beers

He also tells you about the oddity that is Steve

He seems pretty funny, he just has that vibe to him that he’s a really funny guy outside of work

He probably flirts a bit but in a light hearted easy way

But over all he just has the vibes that he’s just really cool and he’s a neat boyfriend

Frances

She seems very fun loving and buddy buddy outside of work

Cesare said that his workers are just a bunch of theatre majors and I believe that for Frances

I’m gonna say it, she has theatre kid energy

I really think she’d be fun to hangout with if not date too, similar to Tim

She seems like she enjoys the gimmick of working at a themed food truck and even enjoys them as a customer since likes bad food

Would honestly get shitty food with you just to eat it and hate it

Conrad

I love him

I love me some beefy strong dumb guys

He is an absolute idiot yes, but he looks like an absolute sweetheart too

He seems like he’d gladly go on any type of date with you

He’s totally able to pick you up, he can man a canon for crying out loud

He’s real gentle with you if he’s carrying you or picking you up since he’s really tall and super strong

If anything is ever too heavy for you, he’ll be a sweetheart and offer to hold/carry it for you

He looks like he’s lowkey real soft on the inside

Some of that tough brute exterior, soft sweetie interior

Doctor

He tries to be a gentleman

He succeeds for the most part

Also, I hc that he didn’t actually talk like that but he would be doing it for so long and would do it off the clock for fun, to the point that it just… stayed

He treats you well regardless though

He’s probably more into the romantics than the rest of them and goes out to dinner with you to a restaurant

He wants to try and make his own meals so that you guys can have your own dinner dates at home

But judging by the s2 intro, our boy can’t cook for shit

Cooking dates are probably a most simple type of date night activity though

Cesare 

You are… you are dating a dead guy possibly

Most likely

Maybe some type of entity of the underworld

I don’t know but obviously he’s an interesting person to date either way

He’s very… strange to put it in simple terms

You have never been to his place (most likely because it’s some type of underworld)

You’ve probably asked and he did a little tangent about how you’re not allowed there

He does come to your place a lot

Cemetery dates? Cemetery dates

You can bring food for yourself but the food is only for you since he “doesn’t eat”

He probably walks about with you making fun of some of the headstones

Rants about his evil schemes, his workers, and Big Top Burger all the time to you

I feel like you’re relationship is more leaning to the situationship side since you will go days without seeing him and then he’ll just show up

You think that he’s just a busy guy with his food truck business

But in all honesty that’s obviously not the case with the shit that he can do and is up to

Well at least you have a strange and off-putting, possibly a real undead, goth boyfriend

[lolotheparagon]

Jim Carrey Movies That I Recommend and Have Aged Well:

The Mask ** - You get a cute movie about a shy guy wanting to date Cameron Diaz and ends up becoming a Looney Tune man cos of a Norse mask and ends up getting the police and the mafia after him. It’s pure unfiltered fun. Even if it has a bit of that 90s stink.

The Grinch *** - While it does reek of early 2000s writing, it’s a decent Xmas movie about how consumerism around Xmas sucks, learning to trust others again and getting revenge on your bully who’s ridiculed you since childhood and Carey’s hammy as fuck in this movie. Seriously he’s the only reason I’m recommending this movie at all.

Bruce Almighty - Some sexist jokes and a shitty third act misunderstanding aside, it’s a fun movie that takes advantage of its plot about a guy with literal God powers but learns a lesson in appreciating the small things in life. Which is an important lesson to learn if the main character’s a white guy with a good job, nice apartment and a hot wife.

Yes Man - it’s ultimately Liar Liar but with learning about openmindedness being the message rather than honesty. Also it’s more soft and less raunchy than its spiritual predecessor and l like that.

Batman Forever - yeah he was in this. Riddler has never had such an ideal casting choice until Wally Wingert came along. The movies just jam with bats on it, you’ll love it

Horton Hears a Who - Its a shame Blue Sky Studios shut down cos this is the most accurate adaptation of a Dr Seuss book and it also knows how to have fun with being a kids film. Also it’s meme-tastic.

Mr Popper’s Penguins - no seriously it’s a wacky kids movie. It’s not the end of the world. I love how Carrey only took on this movie just to tap dance with a bunch of penguins like Dick Van Dyke, who is his hero. That’s really sweet.

Sonic movies - the only time Jim Carrey has been funny in recent years. I don’t really watch his content anymore cos of obvious reasons. (anti vaxxer) but it’s nice he’s returned to his silly roots.

Liar Liar * - it’s an inherently sweet movie about a dad trying to learn a lesson in honesty to save his relationship with his son. Although Fletcher winning back his wife as well is a bit of a stretch. Has this movie never heard of exes that are amicable to each other?

Asterisks:

* - Liar Liar is really into men being SA’d for a joke and it’s really uncomfortable to see Fletcher get roped into sex by a senior executive and him getting fondled and forcibly kissed by his female client. Wasn’t the 90s all about stopping workplace harassment?

** - There was one scene in the Mask where he seduces Cameron Diaz and it reeks of Pepe LePew vibes. Although things didn’t go too far apart, the fact we didn’t have a scene of Stanley immediately regretting that or at least have him and Cameron Diaz’s character bring that up during the jail scene later on really bugs me. Also Stanley’s sleazy friend pisses me off.

*** - Someone on the crew was really horny for Martha May Whovier (mostly cos she’s played by Christina Baranski) cos she’s clearly only there for fanservice. Seriously she wears slutty Christmas dresses, there’s a scene where Grinch’s face gets plastered into Martha’s cleavage, the mayor simping for her is played by Jeffrey Tambor is just creepy. What’s even worse is that during a flashback scene we see a younger Martha May suggestively licking a lollipop at a young Grinch during class… YIKES. I don’t care if that was meant to be a joke it’s still fucking creepy.