⋆ ★ Once again, for the first time ⋆ ★
{Ellie Williams x Reader}
Summary: Being in love with your best friend has got to be one of the most emotionally exhausting things someone can experience, so it’s time you put your foot down and moved on….at least, try to move on
an: God it almost feels wrong to just come back after so long without a continuing chapter to what I’ve been working on, pls don’t be mad at me 😵💫. I’ve been really busy you guys! I just got home yesterday and while I know you’ve all be asking for other things, I just haven’t been feeling super inspired to continue them RIGHT NOW, and I feel that’s why I’ve been MIA for so long. While I say I’m not inspired to continue them right now, that doesn’t mean I’m abandoning them! I will be coming back to them don’t worry! For now, I hope this little angsty fic is enough for you all, and I hope you’ve stuck around to read it, and if you haven’t, that’s okay too. Anyways, I’ve missed you all so much, and I hope you like this one 🖤🖤🖤.
Warnings: ANGST!!! Eventual smut in future chapters, Ellie is an oblivious idiot, Quiet!reader, momentary alternative love interest (it’s just for the story I promise 😉), jealous!Ellie, possessive!Ellie, Please let me know if I missed anything!
Part 2 can be read, here!
The warm glow of your tv screen became blurry with each passing second. You could barely make out the erratic movements of the video game characters beating each other to a pulp as Ellie’s fingers tapped away at the buttons on the game controller, soft huffs leaving here lips ever so often. “Fucking dick..” She mumbled under her breath, eyebrows knit in deep concentration, eyes almost growing watery from her lack of blinking.
You on the other hand, you were nearly fast asleep. Cuddled into your sofa, resting your head against a pillow that was propped up against the arm of the couch, a plush blanket draped over your body as you watched your best friend control a scantily clad character to violently fight the opposite person.
This was tradition for you and Ellie. She’d come over, you would force her to study with you because she was often too stubborn to do it without you, you’d order shitty take out, watch her play video games, and then you’d fall asleep. It always ended with her dragging you to your bedroom, staying with you for a bit before she left, and then in the morning, she’d be waiting for you outside your apartment to go to school together.
And that was life, life with your best friend that is. It had been that way since you were practically babies, your routines changing and adapting to whatever phase of life you were both in within that moment, but it was always more or less the same. And you couldn’t complain, you wouldn’t change it for the world.
Not even if you were given the chance to have her as something more.
Ellie had always been a charmer, and unfortunately, the extent of her charming demeanor had made its way to you. It was something you noticed early on, as soon as you were able to decipher feelings of love, you were able to link those with Ellie. When people would explain love to you, or you’d see it in others, you thought of Ellie. You realized quickly after that though, that Ellie was your best friend, and feelings would greatly complicate the long history that you two had together.
And so, you swallowed them down.
It wasn’t like it was painful or anything. Sure, seeing Ellie with other girls wasn’t great, but you coped. Life went on, and you promised yourself you’d never let your feelings get in the way of Ellie’s life, your life, or your friendship.
“Man…I’d let Mileena rip my head off any day…” Ellie sighed out, the girl never a stranger to gawking at the make believe video game characters in her favorite games. You let out a sleepy hum, giving her a nod as you cuddled further into the couch, not fully able to comprehend your friends words due to your sleepy state.
The sounds you made caught Ellie’s attention, causing her to sit forward a bit so she could catch a glimpse of your nearly sleeping face. She chuckled softly, shaking her head a bit as she reached forward for the controller, turning off the console followed by the tv before she stood up, taking your hand in hers and pulling you slightly.
“You have the energy of a seventy year old woman…come on, let’s get you to bed grandma” she teased, and it only causes you to whine softly. The couch is so comfortable, and you’re more than happy with sleeping there for the night just so you didn’t have to move and lose the blissful drowsy feeling that came with the sounds of Ellie playing Mortal Kombat lulling you to sleep.
“I’m fine here…” You tried, knowing that she wouldn’t settle for you sleeping there on the couch all night. And she didn’t need to be told twice, she let out a soft hum, one that almost sounded like she’d leave you there, but suddenly you’re being lifted off of the couch, into Ellie’s strong chest, even stronger arms wrapping around your body, which once again caused you to whine.
No matter how tired you were, how close to sleep, you can’t ignore the burning fire in your chest when she holds you like this. Even though being Ellie’s friend was the furthest thing from painful, it was times like this that it got a little too hard. Ellie was always a very affectionate person, especially with people she was close to, and you happened to be at the top on that list.
So, when she’d do things like this, pull you up into her arms and carry you to bed, or slip her arms around your waist and spoon you from behind when you were watching movies together, or when she’d pull you close to her when you were in a crowded room, it was easy to imagine how things would be if it were different, if you were able to have her in the way you wanted.
Only for a moment though.
Ellie hummed softly as she gently rested you on your bed, making sure to pull your socks off because she knew you’d kick them off in your sleep anyways, and pull the blanket, not the duvet, over your body because it was how you preferred to sleep. She knew exactly what to do with you, and it always made your heart tug.
She smiled softly down at you, watching as your heavy eyes grew even heavier once your head hit your soft pillows. She gave your elbow a gentle nudge before she turned off the lights in your room, closed the door, and left your apartment.
And even though you were already falling asleep, you couldn’t ignore the urge you had to ask her to stay. The urge you always had to ask her to stay with you.
You let out a soft yawn, rubbing your eyes a bit before you began writing down in your notebook again. Your headphones played soft music into your ears, the blessing of a noise cancelling headset always making it easy to study in your college library, for a moment, pretending as if you were the only one there.
Until Ellie showed up.
She gently pulled one side of your headset up, her lips close to your ear as she approached you. “Hey stranger” she giggled softly, causing you to whine as you pulled the headset down to rest against your neck. You gave your friend a soft smile as you set your pen down, watching as she promptly took the seat next to you and tossed her bag onto the table.
“Hey yourself…came all the way to the library to see me?” You teased her, propping your elbows onto the table and resting your head against your hands as you watched her slump down into her chair, oversized hoodie hanging on her broad shoulders, light washed denim jeans hanging loose on her hips, short hair lazily tugged up into her signature half up half down ponytail, pretty strands falling down and framing her face perfectly.
God she was a fucking dream.
Ellie groaned softly, her head falling back as she blew air past her lips, staring up at the ceiling of the library. “I have time between classes…so I came to bother my favorite little scholar” She hummed out, giving you a lazy grin as she turned her head back towards you, causing you to roll your eyes at her words.
“You know, you could use this time to study” you try, narrowing your eyes at her playfully, which causes her to roll her eyes right back at you. “Ahhh, please. You’re probably the only one here that actually does that shit” she hummed out, which causes you to shrug, closing your books and stacking them upon one another. “True, but I have the grades to show for it” you nod to herself before you push your things to the side, turning back to your friend and giving her your attention.
“So? What’s happening. You look like you’re just itching to tell me something” you smirked softly, knowing your friend all too well. Whenever became fidgety, or absolutely needed to find you, there was something on her mind.
Ellie smirked softly, staring down at her ring clad fingers before she let out a soft hum, purposefully keeping you waiting with anticipation before she began speaking.
“Do you think Sofia is into girls?”
For a moment, the twinkle in your eye, and the soft smile on your lips as you watch your best friend drops completely. You’re glad she isn’t looking, because you’re sure anyone would be able to see the visible disappointment written on your face as soon as she says it. You only let it fall for a moment though, because you’re immediately collecting yourself, picking yourself up off the ground and giving your friend a soft, reassuring nod.
“Has being straight ever stopped a girl from being into you Ellie?” You tease her, recalling the frequent times girls claimed they were straight, yet somehow always ended up chasing after Ellie after they’ve had one too many drinks.
Ellie groans softly, shaking her head as she sits forward a bit. “No man…I don’t wanna just hook up with her..or..or be her fantasy or something. I wanna…ask her out or something” she mumbled out, cheeks burning red as she toyed with the shiny rings on her fingers. You blink a few times, trying to find the right words to encourage your friend to do it, to pursue whoever it was that she wanted.
No matter how much the words tasted bitter on your tongue.
“Well…ask her, or you can ask around? A close friend of hers would definitely know if she was interested in girls or not” you tried again, watching as your friend frowned in concentration, eyebrows furrowed, green eyes narrowed.
Whoever this girl was, Ellie was doing her head in over her….
It almost bothered you that this was your first time hearing about her.
“You think? I’ve just…I’ve had my eye on her for a while and I think I’m ready to finally make a move, you know?” She sighed out, and you nod slowly, giving her a soft smile paired with a reassuring nod.
“Then go for it, Els. The worst she can say is no, and even then, there are plenty of other fish in the sea” you assure her. Because it’s true, Ellie never stayed single for long. There were always girls interested in her, or her them, and it wasn’t long until she was introducing you to a new, pretty girl that she’d have on her arm for the next however many months.
She smiled softly as she nodded, your words clearly getting through to her, as they always did. She gives a determined nod, moving to stand up from the chair she was sat at. “You’re damn right there is…hey, I’m gonna try to find someone to talk to, but I’ll catch you later, yeah?” She nods, slinging her bag over one of her shoulders, already walking away from the table as her eyes never left yours.
You give her a soft nod, eyes lingering on her form as you let out a low hum. “Always” you confirm, knowing that it was true. You’d always be there when Ellie needed you.
She beamed back at you, giving you a nod. You could practically see the excitement shining off of her body, seeping through her pores. “And I’ll catch you this weekend! Your place!” She shouted, causing your eyes to widen at her volume, the other students instantly shushing her. You give her a quick nod, your hands fanning away as you shoo her out of the library, a soft giggle leaving your lips.
You ignore the little cracks in your heart, because the smile on her face makes up for it. You know it’ll pass, you know this is merely a phase of your life that you’ll look back on and laugh at once you’ve found the person that was right for you, one that filled up the little holes that Ellie left in your heart.
And oh how you couldn’t wait for that day to come.
You don’t see Ellie that following weekend.
In fact, the last time you actually saw her was that day in the library, with the few times you saw her in and out of classes that the two of you shared.
Ellie ended up talking to Sofia that same day, and it turns out she was interested in girls. From the texts that she sent you that night, she was raving about the day that they had set up after hours of talking out in the courtyard. She tells you she’s sorry, that she can’t make it out to your place for your routine weekend together, and you tell her it’s fine, to have fun and tell you all about the date the next morning.
And suddenly, you can’t remember the last time you spent more than five minutes with your best friend.
You text here and there, and she catches you outside of class when you happen to make it there at the same time sometimes, but you don’t really have lunch together anymore like you always do, you don’t sit outside in the courtyard to kill time between classes together, she doesn’t visit you in the library, all of those things just suddenly stop.
And then she tells you, she’s dating Sofia.
She tells you they made it official after the first four dates, and at first you feel it’s a bit fast, but you realize they spend all of the time that you and Ellie used to spend together, with each other instead, and it suddenly makes sense. Ellie had a girlfriend now, and it was the explanation for the sudden lack of her presence, the absence of your best friend on weekends. While you stared at your tv screen alone, she was with Sofia.
And you were happy for her, of course you were happy, why wouldn’t you be? She was your best friend and she had gotten the girl she wanted for so long, just as you expected she would…
But the happiness you felt for her lived alongside the sadness that you felt. The two emotions becoming tenants in the home that was your heart, sitting across one another, glaring at each other as they battled for control of you, controlling how you dealt with the situation, how you coped with the sudden disappearance of your best friend.
So, you didn’t give either one control, you ignored them both after a while, and you simply carried on as if nothing had ever happened.
Ellie really was the only person you occupied any free time with, opting to be with her rather than anyone else, because it felt good. You liked it when it was just you and Ellie, it was easy, and it was easy to not overthink things and simply be, rather than worry about how you were behaving.
So without her, you simply did all the things you did with her, just on your own.
Ellie tried to make time for you, while juggling the escapades that come with the early stages of a relationship, you couldn’t take that away from her, but you saw how hard it was. You didn’t want her to feel bad, or feel like she was neglecting you, or her friendship, even if she sort of was. You convinced her it was fine, that she deserved to enjoy her new relationship, and that it needed more attention than your friendship ever would, not right now at least.
And Sofia was great. She was beautiful, and kind, and sweet, and after meeting her a few times, you considered her to be somewhat of a big sister figure. Seeing her made it clear to understand just why Ellie was so keen on taking her off the market as soon as she could.
But that seemed to make it even harder to deal with.
It was on days like this one where it hit you a bit harder, Ellie’s absence. You didn’t mind being alone, but walking to and from classes without her constant banter and jokes definitely wasn’t the best, and heading out to the cafes for lunch was far too quiet on your own, but, you prevailed.
You were making your way out of your third and last class for the day, a soft sigh leaving your lips as you adjusted your bag on your shoulder. The week was finally closing in, and you couldn’t be happier. You yearned for the warmth of your home, your cozy little bed, your favorite mug filled with your favorite hot chocolate, it called to you as you pushed past the large doors of your college building, making your way out to the brisk outdoors of your campus.
The sound of quickening footsteps behind you was almost drowned out as you took your headphones from behind your neck, and began setting them onto your head. A hand suddenly pulled them down, forcing them back around your neck, which caused your eyebrows to furrow as you turned around to see who in their right mind would try to fuck with a girl and her music.
You almost passed out when you were met face to face with your best friend.
Seeing her made you realize just how long it had been since you saw her. You tried convincing herself it had only been a few weeks, but you found it hard to remember the last time you were staring up into those big green eyes, and not imagining them instead.
Your frown was quickly replaced with a soft smile, adjusting your bag on your shoulder as you stared up at Ellie. “Ellie…god…I was ready to start throwing punches” you joked, pulling your headset from around your neck and pushing them down into your beg before you looked back up at her.
Ellie chuckled softly, watching as you went about putting your things away. Her smile was so bright, eyes twinkling, cheeks red, all signs that pointed towards the same thing.
Ellie Williams was properly smitten.
“I’ve been looking for you, dork…you’re always hiding these days” she groaned out, which caused you to hum softly, giving her a slight shrug. “Been busy studying Els…I’m sorry” you tried, giving her a half smile.
Knowing that your studying was not the cause of the divide in your friendship, and neither was it you hiding.
She pouted softly, stepping forward so that you two could walk together. “I miss you…” She hummed out, staring down at the Nikes on her feet, nearly swallowed up by her baggy jeans. Her words make your heart tug as you stare up towards the large trees, swaying with the autumn wind, sun peeking in between the thick foliage of the leaves.
“How are you And Sof? Things going well?” You questioned, opting to ignore the way you heart beat faster when she said she missed you. You were also genuinely curious, you wanted to hear more about Ellie’s relationship, you wanted her to confide in you and trust you as anyone else would trust their best friend with their relationship.
Ellie instantly smiled bashfully at the mention of the girl, a soft hum leaving her lips as she nodded. “Fuck…she’s amazing, man. She’s like a fucking dream, I swear, I’m honestly not sure what I’ve done to deserve her” she sighed out, voice sounding so dreamy and love sick, you can’t help but smile.
“You like her…don’t you? I mean…you’re my best friend, your approval is one that’s pretty fucking important to me” she chuckled out as she looked over at you, head dipping down a bit to try and her a glimpse of your down casted face, her hands shoved into her pocket.
Her words make you hum, and you’re giving her a soft smile as you look up at her. Her expression is written with one that is concerned, concerned that you approve of her relationship, that you think she’s making the right move with Sofia.
And you know in that moment, you have the power to break it all. You have the power to rip things to shreds, just by telling Ellie you think Sofia isn’t the right girl for her, because you know she’ll listen to you. You know she’ll take your feelings into consideration, because she trusts you.
“I think she’s perfect for you, Ellie” you breath out, giving her a reassuring smile.
Because just as much as you know you have the power to be horrible, and rip everything away from them both, Ellie doesn’t deserve that, and neither does Sofia. They don’t deserve to hurt for the sake of your feelings, at the expense of what you feel for Ellie.
And the smile you see your best friend shoot your way makes it all worth it, because it’s like she’s been waiting for those words to leave your lips to go all the way, to give herself to Sofia completely and give into her as she wanted to this entire time.
“Fuck…you don’t know how happy that makes me” she sighs out, looking up towards the sky and letting her eyes flutter shut as she takes a deep inhale, and you know she’s truly happy.
And that makes you happy.
“Hey, are you busy next weekend? There’s a party Sof and I are going to, you should come with us” she says as she looks down towards you. You know it’s a bad idea, because it means you’ll third wheel the entire night, tucked away in a corner to avoid watching them make out all night long until it’s time to go home, where you’ll be just as miserable there as you are in your house.
But you know Ellie won’t take no for an answer.
You let out a soft sigh before you give her a nod, paired with a half smile, and she’s already cheering loudly, causing people around you to stare, and you groan softly as you give her a gentle shove, urging her to stop.
“I’ll text you the details! Sof and I will pick you up” she confirmed, and you give her a soft giggle before you nod. “Get out of here…I’ll see you then” you promise, and she’s smiling brightly as she begins walking away.
And despite the fact that it’s the first time you’ve talked to her in far too long, and it was mainly about her girlfriend, you can’t ignore the way your heart ignites for that small interaction on its own, and the excitement you feel knowing you have plans with her in the near future.
It’ll be fine, you remind yourself. It always has been, and it always will be. And with that, you made your way home.
The following week, is when you met Alex.
You were making your way to your first class of the day, the early morning sun shining down on you, giving you only a bit of warmth from the brisk air that swirled around you and the other students scattered about within the large courtyard that served as a main point sprouting out to all other campus buildings.
Your eyes were trained on your feet, a habit you had that had caused you to run into many people, many times. It was an easy way for you to stay deep in thought, focusing on the way your shoes sounded hitting the pavement with each steps, watching as they crunched against leaves.
“Excuse me?” A soft voice broke you away from your locked gaze on your feet, your eyes blinking a few times as you looked up to figure out who it was that was trying to get your attention.
When you laid eyes on the person looking at you, you nearly passed out.
It was a girl, she was tall, with pretty eyes and a charming smile. Her jacket hung loosely on her shoulders, bag draped over one of her arms, a paper in one of her hands. Her features were strong, yet soft at the same time, mixing together both masculine and feminine and almost making your mind go completely blank as her beautiful eyes stared into yours.
“Um…could you help me? It’s my first day and I’m sort of lost” she chuckled out bashfully, her hand reaching up to run through her hair as she tried handing you the paper in her hand. You simply blinked a few times, watching the girl almost in awe as she stared down at you, before you realized you were in fact gawking at this woman.
You cleared your throat, giving her a quick nod before you giggled. “Yes! Yea…sorry..I…can I?” You question as you gestured towards the paper, which caused her to chuckle softly and nod as she handed it to you.
Your eyes scanned over the paper, furrowing a bit in concentration before you zeroed in on the first class she has in her schedule, and it made you smile.
“Oh, that’s where I’m going! You must be the new transfer student the professor was talking about” you explain, your heart beating a bit faster as you come to the conclusion that not only is this insanely hot girl speaking to you, but she’s also in your first class of the day.
She smiles brightly, pearly white teeth flashing your way as she raises her eyebrows. “No way…would you mind if I walked with you then?” She hums out, eyeing you carefully before you look up at her from the paper, giving her a shy smile as you nod. “I wouldn’t mind at all…come on”
You learn that her name is Alex, and that she was supposed to start the semester with everyone else, but there were issues with her documents so she had to transfer instead. The entire way to class, you take your time together, strolling along the pathways and hallways of your school, getting to know one another. You realize that although it’s your first conversation with her, you feel as comfortable with her as you do with…
As you do with Ellie.
When you realize that, you realize that you’d gone the longest without thinking about Ellie than you had in a long time. Alex takes her off your mind completely, because she’s pretty, and her smile makes you swoon, and being with her feels comfortable.
And you reckon you could get used to it.
When you both finally reach your classroom, there are students scattered about, waiting for the professor to arrive and for the lecture to start. You hum softly as you look over at your usual seat, turning around to look up at Alex. “I sit over there…there’s an empty right next to me if you want” you suggest.
The empty seat used to be taken up by Ellie before she started dating Sofia.
Alex smiles brightly as she nods before you can even finish your words, and that alone prompts you to grab her hand and drag her along through all of the seats to get to the two seats tucked away in the corner, the ones you used to look forward to making your way to almost every day that you had class.
When you two are settled, you fall into a comfortable conversation, your head resting against your hand as you listen to her speak. She tells you about her old school, about her favorite books and movies, her favorite music. You’re so caught up in the conversation with Alex…
That you don’t even notice Ellie walk into the room.
She walks in as she usually does these days, laughing softly at something Sofia said, her arm draped around the girls waist, keeping her close. Had it been any other day, she would’ve made her way down to the usual seats in the front that she has recently taken with Sofia, but the sound of our laugh quickly catches her attention.
At first, she realizes she hasn’t heard the loud sound in quite some time. The only thing she’d received from you in the small moments she shared with you were tiny giggles, or small hums, but never that deep, belly laugh that she loved so much.
Then, when she looks at you, head tilting back as you cover your lips, laughing loudly at something she was oblivious to, her eyes finally fall on the person your body is turned towards. A head of short hair and a leather clad, broad back is turned towards her, and suddenly Ellie is frowning.
Because that seat, is hers.
Ellie gives Sofias waist a soft tap, mumbling for her to wait for her at their seats as she presses a soft kiss to her cheek, green eyes never leaving you and Alex as she continues to make you laugh uncontrollably.
She doesn’t think about much, other than the annoyance she feels that someone is in her seat, regardless of the fact that she’d left that seat empty, leaving you alone for weeks on end. All she knows, is that she doesn’t like that someone is sitting in her seat, she doesn’t like that this is the first time she’s heard you laugh in weeks…..
And she sure as hell doesn’t like that it’s this mystery person that is causing that laugh in the first place.
“I know! I can’t believe you like that show too, I was convinced that-“ your words are cut off by the dark, looking presence that is suddenly hanging over you and Alex. It makes you frown softly, looking up to find a very angry Ellie standing in front of both you and Alex.
“Ellie? Hey! What are you doing here?” You question softly, unable to remember the last time you’d seen Ellie up there at those seats with you. The question is genuine, and for a moment you assume something might be wrong, but Ellie’s expression seems to be even more annoyed than when she first got there.
Instead, Ellie completely disregards your question, the girl annoyed with how innocent and genuine your words are, your big eyes blinking up at her with a twinge of worry as you await her reasoning for being there with you. She looks at Alex, her tongue pressing against her cheek before she nods her head towards the seat she’s sitting in. “That’s my seat” she deadpans, not leaving any room for argument.
Alex raises her eyebrows, staring up at Ellie before she turns to you for a moment, humming casually as she gives a half shrug. “I was told no one sits here anymore” she hummed out, staring up at Ellie in a challenging manner. It causes Ellie to scoff softly, rolling her eyes before she inhales deeply, and you know it’s because she’s trying to control her temper.
“Well I do, so you should find a different seat” she barks back, her tone progressively becoming more and more irritated with Alex. Alex simply chuckles softly, clearly taking Ellie for a joke as she sighs out. “Doesn’t have your name on it…so I’m not going anywhere” she finishes off, clearly done with the conversation with Ellie. Ellie raises her eyebrows, finally looking over at you as if to silently ask if you’re just going to let someone speak to your best friend that way.
And it annoys you to no end.
It annoys you because Ellie didn’t care about the seat for the past however many weeks since she’d been dating Sofia, you were sure it had been a good month at least, and suddenly she cares about it when someone is taking up the spot.
Taking up her spot.
You frown softly, staring up at your friend before you let out a soft sigh. “I think Sofia is waiting for you, Ellie” you try, giving her a slight nod as if to remind her that her girlfriend was in fact waiting for her down at the bottom of the sea of chairs. You hope it’ll clear her head, and whatever this sudden urge to come and check up on you with it. You see a flash of something ripple across her face, something you can’t quite make out for a moment, but once you do, it’s clear as day.
Betrayal.
She inhales deeply, eyes never leaving yours, only when they dart over to Alex. She wants to stay and say more, try to get the idiot next to you to sit somewhere else, anywhere else, but suddenly you’re turning your attention back to Alex, a soft smile on your lips as you fall back into conversation with her as if Ellie wasn’t standing right over the both of you. Ellie feels like she could burn a hole through the floorboards with how much it makes her seethe.
And the worst part is? She couldn’t even understand why it made her feel that way.
Soon, she’s stomping off like a child, down the stairs of the lecture room towards Sofia. She gives you an apologetic look from her spot at the bottom where she sits with Ellie, and it makes you so confused because why is she even looking at you that way? As if she was to blame for her girlfriends behavior? You give her a small smile back, and she turns around towards Ellie, her small hands rubbing the girls back gently as she bent her head down and pressed a soft kiss to her head.
You eye them for a moment, but your eyes don’t linger like they used to. You’re quickly looking back at Alex as she speaks to you, making you forget all about the very strange behavior your best friend just exhibited.
“Sorry about that…she’s…she’s great, I promise. I’m sure you two would like each other” you nod, giving Alex a reassuring smile. Alex hums in response as she looks down at Ellie, her eyes narrowing down at her for a moment before she nods. “I’m sure we would” she smiles out, and you can tell despite the rude interaction they just had, she’s genuine, and she seems to want to know more about Ellie.
But you save that for later, because you’d much rather get to know Alex than talk about Ellie.
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Valentine Boy
Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 (Final)
Special Cover Art by @nakayutasama <3
Summary:
You've been dating College Student! Jaehyun for a few months now. He's unbelievably sweet, smart, oh..and very handsome. Best of all, he gives you the best love you've ever had. He's the love of your life and you can't see anything going wrong as your relationship sails smoothly.that is….until you discover his biggest secret. He's been hiding the fact that he's a camboy and you start to wonder..ls Jaehyun as sweet and honest as you think he is?
Pairing: female reader X college student and camboy!Jaehyun
Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff
Chapter Word Count: 13.5K
Warnings: cursing, cheating, cam boy (video-recorded sex with online audience), brief sexual assault mention (nothing detailed), deception, manipulation, blackmail, alcohol use, minor character death, descriptive smut (fingering, dirty talk, BDSM themes (toy usage, spanking), oral sex (m receiving), threesome, some masturbation, rough sex, vaginal penetration, anal sex, breast fondling).
(A/N): HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!!!💗💗 Jfc I cannot believe this took 3 years 😵💫 please PLEASEEEE forgive me for completely abandoning this as well as other fics, things happen and I couldn’t find any motivation to write for a while. It’s slowly starting to come back, so you’ll notice my writing style is rusty, please be patient with me❤️Anyway, I’ve introduced a new character *hint hint* his name starts with T hehe! Thank you guys so much for reading this series!! I really want to know if you love Cam Boy! Jaehyun or can’t stand him after this finale. So please comment or send an ask! I hope you enjoy! low key, I’m relieved but I’m also kinda sad, anytime I finish a series it’s really like closing a book and leaving the characters behind, it’s weird.. nonetheless!! ENJOY!
Tag List (if you’re still here, I’d be VERY impressed😭): @teddybella @nakayutasama @nainjun @moonflower-98 @cherrym4rk @hwangjinkkami @jeongyoonohs @starlightdustspots @80sjaeden-blog @poisonedsultana @breadjaehyunie @lilaewe @hash-brownsss @lazydepkkst @greatbakerypaperoperator @mymy127 @tiramisubox @cactus-rocks @justineasian @nakamotonikkoru @joyfulghosteagletree @nainjun @bluehippoo @suhtements @lonely-moon-in-the-sky @ratchet-sebooty @mrshatakekakashi-blog @painted-hills @haylo4ever @celestiababie @ubbesson @tinybangtanstan @oddeyecirca @hongtyong @johnnysmybabydaddy @yesitsmeavi @polarlight-b @chanyeolscoon @ncteaxhoe @suhweo @jiyoungiejae @suhfluffy @the-universe-in-you-jjh @yutyongie @isolemnlyswearimgood @staywritten @hnvbin @jhhooppppeeee @yunohflwr @gotoartistprofile @shiningstarsarah @glitterfall @minsik-k @yoooori @26zcl @ahtisa02 @wonw00t
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[2:30 PM]
“Miss y/n, I understand that you believe you’re innocent in this situation, but the fact of the matter is that these scandalous photos WERE taken with your permission. You voluntarily posed for these photos”
The Dean flips the posters over on his desk so that he doesn’t have to look at them anymore. You appreciated it, but really, you wished she’d be more sympathetic.
“Y-yes, but not with the belief that they’d ever leave my boyfriend's computer..I’m sorry, I don’t know who is trying to blackmail me, but I’d really appreciate it if campus police could do an investigation. I think my boyfriend was hacked.”
You say quietly, unsure of whether or not you even believed that.
“Of course, miss Y/n, this will be done and the perpetrator may be convicted of sexual assault, should there be enough evidence and should you wish to press charges, but right now, our main concern is maintaining our campus peace and the respectful treatment of others that we pride ourselves in having.”
You nod.
“That being said…” she sighs.
“Myself, as well as your professors, have decided to forbid you from entering the campus.”
Your mouth falls open as your eyes widen. “Wha-“
“It’ll only be for the remainder of the semester. You can join us again in the Fall, but in the meantime, you must finish your classes online at home.”
Your eyes start to fill with tears.
“But it isn’t my fault, I-I don’t understand.”
“Things have to calm down right now, you’ll also be at risk for even more harassment if you stay.” She stands and fixes her blazer, signaling that the conversation was over.
You nod and stand up. She was right. You were in a vulnerable state right now. People that hadn’t known you before now knew what your body looked like without your consent. They’d have perceptions about you, they’d look at you scornfully or maybe even make advances.
“Thank you for your time.” You hold your head down and leave the office.
————
Back in your apartment, Bella and Jackson talk about how they ran Jaehyun away. He came to look for you, but they told him they’d have him arrested for trespassing.
“He and the fucking bitch Reina deserve to suffer! I swear to God I will ruin them!” Bella stomps through the apartment.
You hold your face in your hands and sob while thinking about what your life has turned into. You couldn’t show your face on campus now and it’s all because you decided to trust Jaehyun.
“I know what I’ll do, I’ll hack into their account and fucking delete it, how dare they make money after this!”
Bella continues. “They’ll have to start all over.”
“Bella..please..that won’t do anything right now.” You cry even harder. You knew she cared for you and hated seeing you like this, but her getting revenge really didn’t make you happier.
Bella stops in her tracks, rushing to sit beside you and hold your back.
“I’m..sorry, I’m so wounded up, I didn’t even remember that your health is a priority right now. You don’t deserve this and you didn’t do anything wrong, people are just assholes. Have you eaten?”
You shake your head.
“I’ll grab something for you, okay? Stay right here, I’ll be right back!”
While waiting, you hesitantly unlock your phone to check your notifications.
You had nearly 100 missed calls and texts from Jaehyun. You ignore them and block him. You aren’t sure what to think at this point, and it’s not like Jaehyun hasn’t deceived you before. You refuse to be taken for a fool any longer.
You open up the college social media app, CamPak, an app that allows only students on campus to connect with each other anonymously. It’s like Twitter, but for college students whose IP addresses fit the location of the college. You know you probably shouldn’t, but curiosity eats away at you in the silence of your apartment now.
You sigh and scroll through the posts.
Did anyone see those posters this morning? Is this a new nsfw club kkkkk sign me up
She’s hot!! Put the flyers back up
Poor girl must be so embarrassed
Why? She’s the one that posted them obvi, she wants attention
Nah that’s revenge porn
I’d show her a good time
Whoever posted these is a HOE
We don’t need to see this..let it stay on OnlyCams girl
The posts could’ve been worse, you think to yourself and put your phone down. You still feel embarrassed and know you need to be away from it all.
———
[Two Days Later]
“Hey, mom” you drop your duffel bag to the floor and pull your mom into the biggest hug.
“Oh! You’re home early, I thought you had about another month or so?”
You sob quietly, but not because you’re sad, but because it felt good to have someone hold you so lovingly. You’re relieved to be away from it all, and although it sucks having to switch to online classes so late, you prefer working from your home with only your mom around you.
“Yeah..well, I decided to leave early and finish up my classes from home.”
She pulls away to look at you, a frown coming across her face when she sees your swollen, red eyes.
“Wait, what’s wrong?”
You hesitate to tell her the truth, how could you explain that you were the one that allowed the photos to be taken in the first place? The last thing you needed was for her to scold you for not protecting yourself.
“Nothing…it’s just been a difficult semester, I’m glad to be home now.” You give her a small smile.
“If something was wrong, you’d tell me, right?” Her eyes plead for an answer.
You nod. “Of course.”
You don’t need to relive your embarrassment by showing her the pictures and explaining everything, it’s all going to be okay now.
———
[Two Weeks Later]
You focus on your studies and get your work done online as expected. Bella tells you that students stopped talking about what happened a few days after you left. Luckily, social media and preparation for exams kept them busy enough to forget about it.
You breathe a sigh of relief when you finally feel like things are going back to normal, slowly, but surely.
However, you still cry yourself to sleep on some nights. You miss Jaehyun and wonder what you did to deserve this treatment from him. All you did was love him with your entire heart. He took that for granted by risking your privacy and pulling you into a game you had no understanding of.
You never think of texting as this distance is necessary, but you didn’t know that he was keeping in contact with your mother.
She loves him so much, thinking that he is incredibly charming and thereby, perfect for you. She thinks of him as her son already. So when he shows up to her house one day, she doesn’t hesitate to let him in.
“Honey!” She calls out to you as you wrap up a final paper while sitting at your desk in your room.
“Yes! I’m almost done.”
She still opens the door and peaks her head in.
“Jaehyun’s here. He says he couldn’t get you on your phone, so I told him you’ve been studying h-“
“What?!” You turn to look at her with wide eyes, your fingers begin to tremble over the keys of your laptop.
A week later, you’re finally starting to heal, and here he comes to ruin it all, to remind you of everything that went wrong.
Your mom’s brows furrow. “What’s wrong? Did you guys have a fight?”
“No..no, it’s fine.” You know how much Jaehyun means to her, but now is not the time to explain everything that’s happened.
“Oh..ok. I’ll tell him to come up then.”
You fix your hair and put on lip balm to look somewhat decent while wearing a hoodie and sweatpants.
It doesn’t matter what you look like, but you don’t want him thinking your life has fallen apart completely.
He knocks and waits for you to answer.
“Y/n..”
You clear your throat. “Come in.”
He pushes the door, stepping in quietly.
He wears a black hoodie over sweatpants too, but his hair is disheveled. He has a faint mustache and beard under his dark eye bags. He looks like he hasn’t slept in days.
“What are you doing here?” You find it hard to look into his tired eyes so you look to the floor.
He closes the door behind him and steps towards you quickly, raising his hand to caress your face.
“Y/n..I’m so sorry, please forgive me..I-“
You step back away from him, bumping into your desk before gripping the edge hard. You feel the blood start to leave your knuckles.
“Get out..I don’t want to see you..” your eyes start to fill with tears as you speak weakly.
“Y/n..baby, it wasn’t me, and I swear to you I will get Reina back for this. She’s ruined you, she’s ruined us.”
“Us?” Your eyes flicker up to him.
“Stop acting like this is as difficult for you as it is for me, you’re not the one whose nudes were plastered all over campus and parts of the internet without consent. If you really cared about me, you would’ve done something already.”
Jaehyun’s hand goes to his side as his face falls. He shakes his head. “I’m sorry, I was a fool..please let me make this right.”
He leans in again, and you flinch as if scared of him for some reason.
He stares in confusion. You don’t want him to touch you anymore.
“Jaehyun…you can make this right by leaving. Don’t contact me or my mom again..” you start to cry and turn your back to him.
“It wasn’t me, I was hacked, you have to believe me!” He starts to cry as well. “I’d never do this to you.”
But the fact of the matter is he already did. He betrayed you by getting this job with Reina in the first place.
”You’re pathetic for trying to claim innocence right now. You know what’s funny, Jaehyun? I would’ve never known of Reina had it not been for you..”
He swallows hard and steps back.
You turn to face him. “If you hadn’t lied..if you hadn’t been greedy..If you weren’t the coward that you are.”
You’re almost unrecognizable as Jaehyun sees the rage in your eyes.
”Get. out.” You say firmly with tears streaming down steadily.
Whether or not Jaehyun released the pictures and posted them online, he was still the one that took them, he had possession. It would be hard to prove his innocence, not only to you, but to the world as well.
He knows this, but he doesn’t care. He just wants to love you again.
He turns to leave, but stops at the door. “I don’t blame you for being upset with me..but I will always love you, regardless of what happens.”
You exhale before falling onto your bed and wrapping yourself in your blankets. Your heart still aches for him, it hurts to be so cruel.
———
[Later That Day]
A plastered drunk Jaehyun slams the counter at the bar.
“Another shot!”
“Ooo..don’t you think you should slow down a bit?”
Reina sneaks up behind him while rubbing his back.
“Fuck..” he puts his head in his hands. She’s the last person he wants to see.
“You’re always so happy to see me, makes me feel loved.” She says sarcastically while sitting on the stool next to him.
“You’re..such a bitch..” he slurs out.
“But you love it, don’t you?” She pouts and places her fingers on his chin to tilt his face towards her. “If it makes you feel better, I do like the scruffy look.”
He pushes her hand away and stands up, he drunkenly stumbles through the crowd to get away from her, but she wraps an arm around his waist and helps him to the back. She pushes him against a wall and leans in close.
“Come on, Valentine Boy, it’s just you and me now, we can do whatever we want. We can make so much money again, what do you say?”
Jaehyun chuckles. “Reina..even enhancement pills won’t get me hard for you again.”
He was done with her and completely disgusted after all she’d done to hurt you.
Reina’s fall smiles. “You don’t mean that..”
She tries to kiss him, but even in his drunken state, he’s able to push her way.
“Get off of me!”
She still doesn’t stop. “Look at me, Jaehyun, don’t I remind you of her? Treat me like you would treat her if she comes crawling back. You’d love to make love to her, wouldn’t you?”
She kisses his neck while holding his face in her hand. And for a brief moment, Jaehyun does imagine it’s you kissing him. Then, he has flashbacks of your heartbroken and angry face watching him leave. He’d never forget it, because it had been burned into his heart.
“You’re not her! You’ll never be her!” He brushes her off again, but in a fit of rage at his declination, Reina throws herself to the floor to make it seem as though he pushed her.
A ruckus is caused as men storm over to Jaehyun. “What the hell was that?!” They push him into the wall before he can explain.
“He hurt me!” Reina pretends to cry.
Jaehyun said no to her again, and this was unforgivable. She made her feel pain, so it’s only right that she does the same.
“Is he bothering you?” One of the men asks.
“Yes.” She sobs and stands up slowly.
The men take turns kicking Jaehyun down on the ground, making him spit up blood and groan. They pick him up and throw him outside of the bar and onto the street.
Eyes black and blue, stomach filled with bruises, and arms sore, but Jaehyun was convinced that he still didn’t feel as bad as you did. If this was his way to receive pain for what he did, then he’d gladly take it.
Reina hasn’t given up on him just yet, so she devises a plan. She bends over Jaehyun and chuckles. “You should’ve just said yes, Valentine Boy.”
She takes his phone out of his pocket and looks for your number. When she finds it, she puts it into her phone and heads home, leaving Jaehyun to groan in pain and roll around on the dirty pavement.
She calls you up and to her surprise, you actually answer.
You aren’t sure if it’s a professor trying to reach you about one of your finals so you answer just in case.
“Y/n..it’s me, Reina..I’m so sorry.”
You roll your eyes. “I should choke you for what you did.”
“I know..it seems like I’m the one that did this..” Reina starts to cry and sniffles over the line. “But it’s not true..I want to explain everything, I want to help you.”
And for some reason, you listen to her, you trust her. Jaehyun had proven he’s a liar before, but you wanted to hear Reina’s side of the story. So you listened and decided for yourself what you needed to do.
—————
[Three Days Later]
Your thumb hovers over the [send text] button on your phone. Did you really want this? Were you ready?
You take a deep breath and hit send.
You to Jaehyun: let’s meet
You put your phone face down on your desk right away and look to the floor, but just a few seconds later you hear a notification.
Jaehyun to You: yes, I can pick you up now if you’d like
You to Jaehyun: ok
You finally style your hair and put makeup on. You hadn’t felt like yourself since everything happened. You felt ashamed for some reason and a part of you felt that you didn’t deserve to feel pretty. All that changes tonight, however, you’re going to get your life back.
Within an hour Jaehyun arrives at your mom’s place to pick you up.
His eyes grow large at the sight of you in a flowy dress that compliments your body so well.
He hurriedly opens the passenger door and smiles.
“You look amazing.”
“Thanks..you look..better.” You give a small smile and sit inside his car. He cut his hair and shaved his beard and mustache. His eyes still look tired though.
You look at the side of his face and observe all the features you missed. The way his slender neck looks in white crew neck shirts and how his sturdy pecs often peaked through if the collar was stretched. His arms looked toned, his veiny hands gripped the wheel hard. It all reminded you of the many nights you spent together with him pinning you down and making the best love to you.
Is this all that you missed him for though? Is it just lust, is it truly love? You question everything as you sit next to the man you once swore you would grow old with.
The air is tense during the drive to his place, neither of you want to be the first to say what’s on your mind.
“Are you…almost finished with your exams?”
Jaehyun breaks the silence.
“Y-yeah..I have one more. You?”
“I’m done, had my last one this morning.”
He nods and focuses on the road.
“That’s good” you look outside the window.
More time passes between you, creating an awkward space that you just have to break.
“I…forgive you, Jaehyun.”
He hits the brake a little too hard, causing the car to jerk you both forward in your seats. He turns to you now that you’re parked right outside his apartment.
“I-I’m so sorry, y/n…thank you, I promise to make it up to you and find those assholes. I was hacked and the techs at the library were able to wipe my hard drive so it never happens again.”
Did he wipe it to hide something or did he really get hacked? You thought to yourself.
You nod, desperately trying to hide your skepticism.
He leans in close, caressing the side of your face like you’re a precious jewel. “I love you..so much, you mean the world to me..and I’m sorry this happened to you.”
You place your hand over his, keeping his stare, but finding it hard to feel the love for him that you once felt in your heart.
“I know…let’s put it behind us..I just..want to spend time with you.” You start to tear up. You wish things to go back to how they used to be, but deep down you know that isn’t possible. He’s broken your trust more than once now, and you’re finding it hard to put the pieces back together.
Jaehyun, however, is ready for a third chance, his heart racing at the thought of you being his again. He’s going to do everything in his power to keep you this time.
“You mean everything to me.” His eyes fill with tears and it breaks your heart. You can’t help but feel sad when you see him like this. Despite all he’s put you through, it still hurt.
“I know..don’t cry, I’m right here..I’ll always be here.” You wipe his tears away before kissing him.
Your lips stay together for a few seconds before you pull away.
“Come on..let’s go inside.” You tilt your head towards his door.
As soon as you get inside, you resume your kiss while peeling your clothes off of each other, but stop when you feel movement around your ankles.
You pull away from Jaehyun’s lips and look down. “Wh-what’s that?”
“Oh!” He chuckles and bends down to pick up the gorgeous white and brown dog with huge ears. “This is Dora, I got her for you..for us, before everything went down..”He says softly as Dora sniffs your face.
You take her from him, your eyes welling with tears in the process.
“She’s..so precious, Jay.”
His eyes follow your soft face and he thinks of how much he missed you and hearing you call him that.
Your heart kept breaking that night, an overwhelming amount of emotions flowed through you.
Why is he doing this to you? Why is he making you fall in love with him all over again?
You sniffle and place her back down.
“She’s perfect…thank you.”
You take his face in your hands and resume kissing him.
He drags the zipper of your dress down with one hand behind you, then overtakes your tongue with his, gaining a quiet moan from your body.
The way he did things with such skill always turned you on.
Your dress falls to the floor, bunching up around your feet. You step out of it and bump into his kitchen counter while your lips are still attached.
When you open your eyes to unbutton his jeans you see bruises all along his midsection.
“Jay…what-what happened to you?” You pant.
“Oh..it’s nothing.” He tries to go back to kissing you, but you pull away.
“No..it definitely looks like something to me. No more secrets.” You look into his eyes.
“I-it’s stupid, I don’t want to talk about it right now..”
“Well..I do.”
Jaehyun sighs and looks to the ceiling. “Reina tried to get back with me and I told her no…she got a couple guys to beat me up.”
Your mouth falls. “What? Why would she—“
“Because she’s delusional..now kiss me before I go crazy.”
You smirk and raise an eyebrow. “Why should I kiss a guy that can’t win a fight?”
He sticks his tongue in his cheek and chuckles while stepping back. “Touché”
“I’m just joking, come here..”
“Nah..I’m good.” He walks to his room.
You run after him. “Okay I’m sorry, let’s forget about-“
He turns around and grabs you by the waist, swiftly bringing you onto his bed.
He kisses you harshly, biting your lip. He shows off his multitasking skills once again by taking your bra off for you as you hover over him.
Once off, he lets your lips go and smiles. His dimples and soft crescent-shaped eyes make your heart weak. He holds your arms while nuzzling his face into your neck. You giggle at how ticklish it feels.
He then flips you over onto your back and looks into your eyes.
You feel goofy as you smile up at him.
“I missed you so much, baby” he whispers while searching your eyes.
“I missed you too..”
“Oh yeah?” He raises an eyebrow.
You nod and bring your bottom lip between your teeth.
He leans back on his knees and licks his lips.
“Did you touch yourself when you missed me?”
You nod again.
“Sweetheart, let me hear your pretty voice..” he says lowly.
Your chest rises and falls rapidly as he looks down at you with lustful eyes.
“Yes..I did.��
“Naughty girl, you know your fingers can’t replace me, right?” His eyes fall from your exposed chest to the waistband of your panties.
“I know..but they still feel good.”
“Hmm, show me.” He demands.
You take your panties off and throw them to the side, then begin to finger yourself with Jaehyun watching intently.
He brings his jeans and underwear to the middle of his thigh before cupping a fist around his hard member.
You watch him move it up and down slowly and at the same tempo at which you tease your entrance to build your own arousal.
When you put two fingers in you moan and throw your head back.
“That’s it, baby. Fuck..you’re so wet already”
“Only for you, Jay..” you whimper and close your eyes tightly while thinking about the times when Jaehyun had you reeling from his thrusts.
He nearly cums from hearing your breathy words.
You move your fingers in and out of your silky walls, pushing in deeper and deeper. You find that fleshy spot and massage the tips of your fingers against it, just barely applying pressure.
Jaehyun pumps his cock up and down as well, nearly drooling from the sight of your essence-covered fingers entering you over and over.
“Fuck..I’m gonna fun, baby.” You move your fingers faster, but Jaehyun quickly grabs your wrist, placing your dripping fingers into his mouth to suck them clean.
“So good..you taste so good..”
He kisses your neck while aligning his cock with you. Your hands massage his back as you call out his name.
“Jay..it’s been so long baby, I need you.”
He teases you for a bit, running the tip just along the slit.
“I know..” he groans into your neck and finally pushes into you all the way. You gasp, your nails dig into his back.
No matter how much you prepped yourself for him, he always felt big.
He thrusts into you slowly, ensuring that you feel every vein while adjusting to him.
You mewl as your head spins. It feels so good to have him on you after all this time. For a moment, you forget about everything that's happened.
“Ahhh pretty baby, God you’re so tight.”
He kisses your neck and thrusts harder.
“All for me, right? I just have to stuff you well. You can handle it, right?”
You moan. “Yes! Harder, please!”
And Jaehyun listens, pounding you into the bed over and over to hear your scream louder.
He places both legs over his shoulders, grasping your ankles as he fits himself into your body at a different angle.
Your mouth falls open as you call out his name again.
It doesn’t take long for you to quiver around him, cumming hard while your eyes roll to the back of your head. He moves a few more times then cums too, coating your walls with so much, you’re sure that some will leak out.
“Better than your fingers.” He smirks and falls down onto the bed beside you.
You chuckle and lay on his chest.
“I think I need another shower.”
———
[One Week Later]
For Jaehyun, everything went back to normal. You love him and he loves you, you both take care of your darling Dora together. You go on dates and talk about life as you always do. You make love and spend time cuddling together whenever you’re at his place.
For you, however, it feels different. Jaehyun was the love of your life, but he kept hurting you and you felt the scars on your heart hesitating to heal. You try your best to smile and act as if you don’t suspect him. Your brain tells you everything is okay, but your heart is saying something else.
In the end, would this hurt you or him more?
“Hey. What do you think of this one?” Jaehyun breaks you out of your thoughts as you stare across the vast land of the vineyard.
You’re on a vineyard tour together and get the pleasure of trying different wines.
He hands you a small cup to take a drink out of.
You drink it and close your eyes for dramatic effect. “Oooo..” you exhale. “Nice.”
Jaehyun smiles widely. “I like that one too. Come on, let's grab a bottle.”
“Whoa whoa there, we just started the tour..” you laugh. “What if there are others we like?”
He steps closer to you, gazing down into your wide eyes. “I’ll buy every single one you like.”
You look away and scoff. “You’re so cheesy.”
He chuckles before taking your hand in his and kissing it. “Only for you.”
The day goes by and you finally get to Jaehyun’s place.
You make out by his front door as you say goodbye.
“You sure you don’t wanna stay over?” He says in between kisses. He rubs his hand along your back.
“I’d love to..trust me, but I have something to take care of.”
You smile back.
“Oh..ok, do you need me to drive you?”
“No, I got it!” You say quickly while stepping back.
“Oh. Well, I’ll see you later then.” He smile before waving you off. “Call me when you get home, okay?”
“Okay!” You yell over your shoulder then walk swiftly out of his sight.
Jaehyun felt something was off about the way you said bye just now, but he shrugs his shoulders and heads inside to Dora.
“Just me and you now, girl.” He bends down and kisses the top of her head.
Meanwhile, once far away, you look back to make sure Jaehyun’s door is shut and he is inside. You then call an Uber.
The Uber drops you off at a place you never thought you’d be at again.
Reina’s apartment.
——————
[One Week Later]
You and Jaehyun have dinner and a Netflix movie date. The food was fantastic and you truly enjoyed your time with Jaehyun. It was romantic and reminded you of the old days.
Something about him at night with his sharp facial features illuminated by candle lights made him irresistible.
Your dress suddenly felt tighter as he gazed into your eyes while holding your hand.
“Should we go now?” He asks smoothly as if hearing your thoughts about how badly you wished he’d rail you across the table right then and there.
“Sure.”
While on your way to his place, you receive a text.
You’re coming over tonight, right?
A big bidder messaged me saying he’ll be there
Remember you get half
You quickly closed your phone screen and looked out the window.
“Everything okay?”
Jaehyun squeezes your thigh gently.
You turn to him. “Yeah..yeah definitely. It’s just…”
His brows raise. “Just what?”
You frown. “I have to take care of something again tonight.”
“Oh! Are you sure? Is it something I can help you with?” His hand grips the wheel as he speaks huskily. He was slowly starting to get tired of you leaving him alone at nights. Something felt off again and he wasn’t sure why.
You sigh. “Unfortunately, no, I have to go in about 30 minutes.”
“Oh…damn.” He exhales.
You sit in silence for about two minutes as he drives home, then he pulls over on the side of the road.
“Something wrong with the car? What are you doing?” Are you nervous about him suddenly stopping? Does he know?
Jaehyun puts the car in park then turns to you. “You said 30 minutes, right?”
You nod as you stare at him with wide eyes.
“Okay..we have time..I’ve been thinking about you in that dress all night.”
He runs a hand through his hair then licks his lips.
He leans in for a kiss and you kiss him back fervently, he kisses you like he’ll never get a chance to again, tugging your bottom lip before licking over it. He turns his head to get more and you give him just what he is asking. His hands hold the sides of your face still as you fall into him more and more, but then, you remember the texts and pull away after a few seconds.
“God..you’re so good…but I really can’t..” you say breathily.
Jaehyun’s brows bunch together. “W-why?”
You look at his lips. “I really want to…I’ll make it up to you, okay?”
“But baby, we have like 25 minutes at least let me taste you..”
You shake your head. “I’m sorry, I’m just not in the mood tonight.”
You lied to him, but it was the only way to get him to start driving again.
You hadn’t had sex in 2 weeks, you wanted to, but it didn’t feel right.
“What’s wrong? Did I do something wrong?”
You shake your head again while looking to the floor. You couldn’t look him in the eyes as your heart beat out of your chest.
“No..no, it’s not you, it’s me..I just need you to be patient with me, okay?”
“Oh, of course! I’m sorry.”
Jaehyun nods and puts the car back in drive, feeling like a huge jerk for making your discomfort about him.
As you’d done a week prior, you wait for Jaehyun to get inside then call an Uber.
You head inside Reina’s apartment and get ready for your second love video with her and Taeyong, her new male counterpart.
“Are you going to be able to do it this time?” She asks as you place your bag down on the couch. You look onto the intimidating setup with lights and a tripod before swallowing hard.
“She doesn’t have to if she doesn’t want to..although it would be nice, I’m sure she tastes amazing.” Taeyong leaves the kitchen and heads towards you.
“I’m ready.” You look into his eyes. You couldn’t put up with this game of playing with Jaehyun’s heart for much longer. You were slowly starting to fall in love with him all over again, only hurting yourself in the process. You knew how this would work out.
If it hurt you to do this to him, why didn’t it hurt him when he had done the same for months? Did he truly care about you?
“Great.” Reina smiles before handing you a baby pink lingerie set complete with a leather collar to put on.
You freshen up in the bathroom and put the lingerie on. You look amazing, but you wished you felt the same way. It’s hard to be cruel, especially to someone you once loved.
You step out and hear ooo’s and aaa’s by both Reina and Taeyong.
“Thank you..” you smile slightly.
Having your pictures being shared all over, being labeled as a slut awakened something inside of you. Was it so bad to have people list after your body? Well, not really. But you should at least get paid for it, right? At this point, you didn’t have anything to lose, but you’d get the opportunity to enact revenge on Jaehyun. That was your true goal.
“Now..let’s have some fun.”
Reina places the final touches on your lipstick and looks into your eyes. “You look beautiful, y/n. I know it’s your first time, and I know you’re nervous, but it will be okay, just follow my lead.”
You lay down on the bed and stare at the camera as she turns it on.
Comments flood the screen of the laptop behind it almost immediately. So many people were waiting for her, and in your novice mind, you still couldn’t compute just how big this online community is.
How could Jaehyun hide this from you for so long?
Taeyong wore pink shorts to match your set and a collar as well. He crawled onto the bed beside you before getting on his knees and leaning down.
“Baby girl..look at me..” the tattooed boy says smoothly. He uses two fingers to tilt your chin towards him. He smiles softly before placing his thumb on it and kissing your lips.
You had met him once before this to take your tests at the clinic together. Everything came back negative for all 3 of you, relieving you of any concerns regarding that. Nonetheless, he seemed to be a sweet guy and his looks were just as striking as Jaehyun’s.
His sharp jawline provided a wildly stark contrast to his large brown eyes. Reina described him as the perfect partner, and even thanked Jaehyun for leaving her as Taeyong was more “flexible,” and not just in terms of working hours.
He’d take any position she asked him to.
But when preparing for tonight, you asked that they both be in charge. You’d be the one to listen and follow their instructions.
Taeyong maneuvered his lips in a way that made you dizzy. Jaehyun was a great kisser, but Taeyong wrote the guidebook. His tongue overtaking yours as his bottom lip caressed yours. You moaned quietly, raising a hand to grasp his arm and pull him closer. He smelled and felt amazing as he bent over your body.
For a moment, you forgot about everything, you didn’t think about Jaehyun or even remember the blinking red light of the camera. All you felt was Taeyong, but then Reina places her phone down and gets onto the bed beside you. She kisses your neck, leaving her rouge and warmness all over it.
She kisses along your shoulder, sucking hard and biting into the skin slightly. You whimper at the sudden harshness of her teeth against you.
She then kissed lower and lower until getting to your bra. She pulls the cup covering your hard nipples down and begins to suck the nub. Taeyong releases your lips and kneels back away from you.
“Mhmm..just as sweet as I imagined.”
He smirks while rubbing his thumb along your lips, dipping it in and out slowly as you hollow your cheeks and suck.
They way he looks down at you with swollen red lips and they way Reina flicks her tongue against your sensitive breast makes your toes curl.
You watch him palms his hard member through his boxers, noting how a wet mark appears where his precum has already leaked. Turns out he’s just as turned on as you are.
“Do you want it?” Reina pulls away to ask.
You nod, completely unashamed of how desperate you seemed.
She chuckles. “You have to work for it first.”
Meanwhile, Jaehyun gets a text on his phone after getting home from his walk with Dora. His eyes widened.
He immediately tries to call you, but you don’t answer. He doesn’t stop, dialing you over and over hopes that you pick up. Little does he know that all parts of you are currently occupied by Reina and Taeyong.
Your phone lights up on the kitchen counter from his notifications while you take Taeyong’s cock into your mouth.
Your fingers find Reina’s dripping flower as she continues to suck your nipples.
Taeyong grabs the leash attached to your collar and tugs it slightly to choke you.
“Such a good girl..taking me all in like that.”
You involuntarily moan, sending vibrations onto him. He groans and curses as he moves his hips to drive himself deeper and deeper into your throat.
Reina dips her fingers into your thong and begins flicking the tips against your clit.
You begin to choke as you have trouble breathing while Taeyong destroys your throat. The feeling is raw, but you’re so wet by being like this for them, you don’t mind it.
You feel dizzy and drool drips down your chin.
Taeyong is turned on by the sight below him, his movement stutters as he pulls out and pants. You look up with wide eyes while breathing heavily. Something about him was hypnotizing. You lay your tongue out as he unloads onto it, feeling yourself clench around nothing as you cum as well.
Jaehyun stares at his screen after hearing your voicemail come up for the 10th time. It was vital that he get through to you now. What could’ve been so important that you wouldn’t answer him?
He then sees a notification pop up at the top of it.
“watch Rein on Me Live right now! First 2 minutes FREE”
“Rein on Me” is Reina’s username.
His breath hitches in his throat. Why does he still have her notifications set to “on”?” He thinks to himself and turns the screen off.
He sits down on the couch and puts his elbows on his knees while thinking about where you could possibly be right now.
And then, curiosity gets the best of him. He picks the phone up, clicking the link while holding his breath.
Why is his heart racing? Is he curious to see if she’s gotten another partner for her videos? He’s not sure why, but what he sees shocks him, breaking his heart instantly.
You are on your knees with your ass up, having your collar pulled by Reina who is below you.
Taeyong pushes into you while you choke on Reina’s strapped on cock.
Taeyong grabs your ass, slamming into you so hard, feeling tears escape the corner of your eyes.
“Oh look..she’s crying, Tae. I think you should give her something to cry harder about.”
You put a hand up behind you and onto his abs, pushing him away slightly, begging him to be softer on you.
But he chuckles then slams into you again while placing two fingers into your clit and rubbing circles onto it.
“Oh? Is this too much for you?”
They did give you a safe word for when it all came to be too much, but you wouldn’t dare say it now. Although you were being stuffed on both ends and had trouble breathing as a result, Taeyong felt amazing in between your velvet walls and his loud groans and whimpers told you he felt the same.
You shake your head.
“Good, because you’re gripping my cock like you love this. Isn’t that right? Our girl is a slut, Reina, look at her drooling again.”
The chat room is filled with praises and donations. The viewers loved seeing you like this and hearing the dirty talk between the two. Some wanted to be you, and some wanted to fuck you.
Jaehyun’s eyes grow, his focus shifts from the video and to the comments requesting even lewder acts from the 3 of you. How could this happen? How could you betray him like this? Either way, he has to stop this now.
He puts his phone in his pocket and heads out.
He drives angrily, finding it hard to see the road through his teary eyes. He was so angry he could feel the heat escaping his nostrils as he gripped the steering wheel hard.
Meanwhile, it was Reina’s turn to fuck you with her strap.
She lays on the bed on her back, facing the camera upside down. She rubs her soft hands along your thighs as you mount her.
“Ride me well, or we’ll spank you until you can’t sit on your ass for weeks.”
“Yes..” you lower your aching pussy onto the dual ended strap and begin moving.
Reina whimpers as her side of the dildo enters her with each time you go down.
“That’s it, baby, don’t stop.” Taeyong says breathily in your ear while unhooking your bra.
“Fuck.” He kneels behind you, bringing your hand to cup his hard cock.
He kisses your neck as he pinches your nipples to hear you cry out his name.
Reina rubs your clit with her thumb making you gasp and swivel your hips faster to gain another high. Taeyong then tilts your head towards him and kisses you deeply. He grips your throat, squeezing slightly as his tongue explores your mouth.
He begins to leak all over your hand, but you don’t stop pumping him. You close your eyes and ride Reina even faster, enjoying Taeyong’s passionate kiss as you imagine it to be him you were on top of.
He pulls away, allowing a string of spit to connect your two mouths.
He licks it up then looks into your eyes with a lustful stare. “She’s close, be a good girl and make her cum.”
You nod then lower yourself onto Reina, pulling her bra down to reveal her incredibly perfect breasts. You lick and suck her nipples while fingering her clit.
Taeyong licks his lips at the sight of your dripping opening gliding up and down on the dildo with ease. He pumps his cock and aligns it with your ass while your focus remains on coaxing a well deserved orgasm out of Reina.
He enters you unexpectedly, forcing just half of himself into you before you let out a high pitched scream.
“Oh my god!” You grip the sheets on either side of Reina’s head while your legs tremble at the feeling of being stretched out.
“Ahh kitten, so tight..fuck.” He grabs your waist, digging his fingertips into it to leave what may be a permanent indentation.
He pushes himself all the way in, making you cry again.
You rub your own fingers into Reina faster, making her cum hard. Her eyes roll to the back of your head as she pulls on your leash.
“You’re so pretty like this, isn’t she Tae?”
Reina moans out. “Yes..the prettiest kitten.” He struggles to get out while watching himself enter your tight opening once more.
Reina moves from under you, pulling the strap out of both her and you.
She takes the end that was inside you and puts it in front of your face. “Open, and taste yourself.” She demands.
You open your mouth, sucking it off while looking into her eyes.
You whimper as Taeyong goes so deep inside you, you feel you might go crazy and truly won’t be able to walk for another week. It’s a miracle how he's able to be so big.
“Come on, baby, tell me how good it feels to have me fill you up like this.”
“Feels..so good..” you can’t hold your body up anymore, you fall into the bed as he pounds into you.
More and more payments flood the notification on the laptop screen. Taeyong pushes into you faster while grabbing your leash, and you’re both about to cum again when you hear the front door fly open.
Your eyes open in confusion as you look up at Reina.
She looks confused too. She quickly pauses the broadcast and right after the bedroom door flies open.
“Get the fuck off of her!” Jaehyun stomps towards Taeyong, laying a fist into his face so fast, all 3 of you fail to comprehend exactly what’s happened.
Taeyong falls into the bed as Reina rushes over.
“Jaehyun!” You yell, jumping off of the bed and grabbing the sheets to cover your body.
There goes your dazed feeling.
“What the FUCK is going on here? Reina, what the hell did you do? How could you get her involved in something like this?!” Jaehyun is so angry, his hands create fists at his sides as he glares at Reina. She doesn’t pay attention to him, however, trying to see just how bad his punch was towards Taeyong.
You calm your nerves and finally tell Jaehyun the truth.
“It was my idea, Jaehyun..I want to do this…to get back at you.”
He turns to you with a confused look in his eyes. You don’t turn away from his stare this time, you look into his eyes and remain strong. You thought of all the nights you cried yourself to sleep, of all the times you felt like you weren’t good enough for him.
You thought of his betrayal and the acts it left you.
“W-what?”
You scoff. “Don’t give me that, Jaehyun. I know it was you..I know that it was you who sold the pictures of me and put them up on campus.” You walk closer and closer to him while speaking harshly.
“I know you wanted to embarrass me and make me desperate for you..so I tricked you..like you tricked me this entire time, I made you fall in love, just so I could break your heart.”
Jaehyun’s eyes widen as they fill with tears. His mouth falls open. “You…you really think I could do that to you?”
You nod. “After everything you did to me, you still try to pretend to love me.”
Jaehyun gasps. “Pretend?” He shakes his head. “I have always loved you. There’s not a moment in my goddamn life that I don’t think about you.”
You finally break your gaze, finding it hard to keep your eyes focused on him as he cries endlessly.
“Look..I may have done something shitty and I deeply regret it, but I could never embarrass or dehumanize you like that.” He sniffles. “I’d never put you in danger.”
“Stop lying Jaehyun! We know you were trying to get back at both of us, I tried to stop you!” Reina yells while holding Taeyong, who is still knocked out.
“Fuck you! You’re the reason all of this is happening.”
He takes his phone out and shows you a text he received from his friend. The text he had been calling you about all night.
“Look.. it’s a photo taken from a security camera on campus. I asked my buddy, who volunteers at the police station, to do some digging for me two weeks ago because I wanted to find out who’d done this to you.”
You look at the picture, a breath leaving you once you see who is stapling a print out of your scandalous photo onto a tree.
You turn to her, tears falling onto your cheeks.
“You fucking bitch.”
Reina loses a semblance of her coolness and clears her throat.
“Why? Why did you do this to me?” You sob.
“Because she wants me! She’s so desperate to have me to herself, she’d do something as cruel as this!”
You hold your face in your hands.
“Jaehyun..I’m so sorry..” you reach out to hold him, but he pulls away.
“I’m not surprised by her, but I’m disappointed in you. You’ve hurt me..so badly.” He walks out as you run after him, still clutching the sheet to your body.
“Jaehyun, please!! She showed me the video you made a week before you came to my moms house! She said you were back to making videos together!” You tell him, but Jaehyun shakes his head and turns to you in shock.
“I’d been taking exams the entire time, y/n. There’s no way I’d do that! She just uploads old videos of us to get more money!”
You look back at Reina as she leaves the room too. “Oh..my God.” You crouch down to the floor. How could you be so easy…again?
Reina chuckles and crosses her arms before leaning against the door frame. She nods. “Well..this isn’t exactly how I’d expect things to go down, but I should’ve known you’d still be subscribed to me as part of the notification crew..” she whistles before continuing.
“Yes..I lied, yes..I hacked his iCloud and printed those sexy pics of you, y/n. But it’s only because I wanted to teach him a lesson. He can’t leave me..I made him.” She laughs again. “And to leave me for you? Oh that pissed me off even more. He makes you seem like you’re an angel on Earth. No..he doesn’t deserve you, he deserves someone like me.“ She walks towards him and attempts to touch his chest but he steps back and looks down on her in disgust.
“Valentine Boy deserves someone as lustful, self-centered, and greedy as himself..”
“You’re cruel. And what you did was a crime. I hope it was worth it.”
He speaks sharply.
You cry and remember the call you had just a few weeks ago with her.
[REINA’s CALL]
“I understand why you’re upset..I’d be too, but you have to understand that this is just Jaehyun’s way of getting back at you.. he was upset that you made him stop. He was desperate for cash so he sold your pics y/n.”
You gasp while listening to her over the phone. Should you have listened to her? Maybe not, but could you really trust Jaehyun after everything? After all, he did take the photos.
“I begged him not to..I told him this would ruin you, but he did it anyway..he made some cash, but he didn’t expect whoever these jerks were to print them out and put them all over campus as a joke.”
You scoff. A joke? That’s all this was for them, a joke.
Reina continues. “He got drunk the other night and came to see me. He said that he didn’t expect all this to happen, but that it worked out in his favor anyway. You’d eventually realize that no one else would love you because you've been exposed and praised as a pornstar slut all over campus. You’d be reliant on him forever..or so he hopes. But I won't let that happen, y/n. I want to help you get your revenge.”
“Why should I believe you?”
Reina exhales. “Listen, I have nothing to lose by telling you the truth. As a matter of fact, I have something to gain. If he gets back with you, he’ll stop doing videos with me, and I’ll stop making money. So I’ll need you to break his heart, therefore he’ll come running back to me. Capeesh? Everyone is happy. And I’d you don’t believe me, take a look at the link I just texted you..”
You look at your phone and click the link. It’s a video of Jaehyun and Reina on OnlyCams with the broadcast date showing “One Week Ago.”
Your brows bunch as you grind your teeth. This bastard was already back to this without you being in his life.
He was misleading you again.
“See? You’ve only been separated for a few weeks and he’s already back to making videos and money with me..”
You can almost hear her smile over the phone as you sit there with steam escaping your ears.
“What is it you want from me?” You let out through clenched teeth.
“Ask to be his girlfriend again, then start making videos with me..break his heart this time so that he gives up on you..get your revenge and make money at the same time. You’re pretty enough and by now I’m sure you’re used to everyone looking at your body. So…join us.”
[PRESENT DAY]
“Jaehyun..wait..please, I was stupid, I’m sorry I hurt you!”
You stand up from the floor and hurriedly change into your T-shirt and sweatpants that you brought. You run after Jaehyun as he heads out of the door.
However, Reina pushes you to the side to run after him first. She hurries down the stairs.
“Jaehyun!! Don’t go..I love you more than she does, can’t you see? I went through all this trouble for you! I never doubted you, I never hurt you, I only loved you and shared what I had!”
She wraps her arms around his waist from the back, keeping him still as she sobs.
“You’re everything to me, I need you, baby.”
Your mouth falls open as you watch from the top of the stairs.
This was Reina’s plan all along and you fell for it, like an idiot. You allowed yourself to be played.
You rush down and run away, through the trees, hoping that no one will find you. You’re beyond embarrassed and devastated at how everything has turned out.
Jaehyun pries Reina off of him, grabbing her arms off and pushing her away. She calls onto the ground and reaches up for him, but he only grimaces and steps back again.
“Leave me alone!! You’re fucking crazy! If I see you again, I swear I will call the cops!”
In a final desperate attempt, she grabs his ankle. “If you leave me, I will send everything to your dad!”
Jaehyun’s mouth falls open.
“You wouldn’t dare..” he says with venom on his tongue, he truly couldn’t believe she’d do this to him.
“I don’t love you, I never have and I never will.” He pulls his foot away and continues to his car to drive after you.
He looks all over but doesn’t see a trace in the night sky.
He then takes his phone out of his pocket and goes to dial you, but Reina grabs it out of his hand and throws it to the ground in a fit of rage, breaking it instantly.
“You fucking bitch!” He places both hands around her neck and begins to choke her.
She smiles. “Yes, Valentine Boy, come inside and punish me.”
He grows even angrier, letting go and jumping into his car.
“No no no..don’t go!” She slams the trunk of it as he drives off.
“Fuck…” he drives everywhere, looking through the woods to see if he can catch a glimpse of you running through them.
You find somewhere to rest and crouch down while crying. Your hands shake. How could everything go to shit so quickly?
You take your phone and call Bella.
“Hey..I’m coming over.” You sob.
When you get to your shared apartment, Bella welcomes you with a big hug. “I missed you so much.” She tears up.
You sit down and explain everything to her as she consoles you. Jackson is there as well, making ramen noodles in the kitchen for you.
“Y/n..it’s not your fault, I probably would’ve done the same thing.” He says as he walks in with a bowl.
You take it from him as you sniffle.
“She’s a bitch, she manipulated you. God I can't wait until she gets arrested!”
Bella clenches her fists.
“How..will Jaehyun forgive me? He’ll never look at me again.” You cry harder again.
“No no don’t say that, you’ve forgiven him more than once, he’ll probably forgive you too. Just talk to him…give him some time to calm down, then call him.” Bella rubs your back as you listen. She was right, if Jaehyun truly loved you, maybe he would see it from your point of view and forgive you.
You nod. “Okay.”
And after finishing your noodles and taking a shower, you fall asleep.
———
[The Next Day]
You rub your swollen, red eyes and pick up your phone instantly.
You have no new notifications Jaehyun, only his missed calls from before everything went down. You swallow hard and dial him back, but it goes straight to voicemail. You then send him a text, but receive a message.
The subscriber you are trying to message is not accepting calls or texts at this time.
You sigh and put your phone down on the bed. As expected, Jaehyun blocked you. He’s deeply hurt and wants nothing to do with you. And so you cry again, clutching your pillow to your chest as the day goes on.
Jaehyun stares out of his window and thinks of you. He misses you so much, and now he can’t call you as his phone was destroyed by Reina.
Now that he’s calmed down and erased the image of you having sex with another man from his mind for a moment, he realizes you both messed up, you both hurt each other and he wanted to talk with you to see if you still don’t trust him or rather, do you love him at all anymore?
He’s not sure if you’re at your mom’s place or your place near campus with Bella, or if you even made it home safe..but he needs to find you.
He takes a shower, feeds and walks Dora then gets ready to head out in the afternoon, but he is stopped when he hears a knock on his door.
Dora barks before he shushes her and taps her behind lightly.
He braces himself. Could it be Reina? Could it be you? Could it be the guy he knocked out?
He looks through the peephole and sees someone he didn’t expect.
He opens the door and allows the man in.
“How’s my favorite nephew doing?” Jaehyun’s uncle, Charlie, pats his shoulder before stepping towards the couch.
Jaehyun looks at him nervously, but follows behind.
His uncle is a professor at the college. He was instructed by his father to watch over Jaehyun carefully, but in respect for Jaehyun’s growth as an adult, Charlie never overstepped or took his role too seriously.
“Hi..what’s going on?”
He places his bag down and sits beside him.
“Well..you and I…I guess I should say, you are in some deep shit.”
Jaehyun places his hands in a fist in front of him and his eyes lay on the coffee table.
He placed his fingers over his bruised knuckles, swallowing hard as he anticipates what his uncle will say next.
Not many things bothered Jaehyun, but impromptu visits from his family members always made him uneasy.
“You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that girl whose pictures were put all over campus the other day, would you?”
Charlie leans forwards
“Why do you ask?”
Jaehyun clears his throat.
“Oh well…I just thought you might know something..”
Jaehyun turns to him and speaks softly. “Uncle..why are you really here?”
“Jaehyun..you know..how your father is..”
Upon hearing this, Jaehyun suddenly remembers Reina’s threat. His eyes widened.
“He knows..I know, your mom knows…I mean, personally, I don’t care, it’ll all be erased at some point, but Jaehyun..it’s not looking good for you.”
His uncle continues as he sits back on the couch and exhales.
“Why’d you do it? It’s not like you need the money. Is this like a young couple thing? Is she your..girlfriend?”
“No!…no, not at all..” Jaehyun stands up. He’s furious that Reina really actually exposed him to his father despite knowing their rocky relationship with each other.
“I’m not sure why I did it, Charlie, maybe I needed to feel independent. Maybe I just don’t like asking my hypocritical father for anything..”
Charlie nods, sighing again before fixing his tie. “Well, Jaehyun..whatever your reason is, I get it. You’re your own person.”
Jaehyun stands in silence while clenching his fist.
“Nonetheless, your father is pissed…he wants you back in Korea.”
“What?!” Jaehyun turns around and stares in shock.
“I know..I know..he’s a bit dramatic, but he’s not happy about you becoming a “pornstar.” His words, not mine.”
Jaehyun shakes his head. “I’m not going back.”
Charlie stands and holds his hands out in front of him. “Look, I know you love it here and you don’t want to be anywhere near your father, but think of it this way. You can start fresh back home and learn what it’s like to run a business. Eventually, you’ll make your own money again and won’t have to rely on anyone!”
“But that’s exactly what’s gonna happen! I’ll have to rely on him to get the position! It’s not fair!”
“Jaehyun..I know, you’re upset right now, but just go..at least for the summer break. Maybe you need some time away to rethink everything.”
“No..I won’t.” He looks into Charlie’s eyes.
“Tell him I said “no.””
Charlie sighs and looks to the floor. “He won’t pay for your college anymore…you’ll officially be on your own, cut out of the family name completely, is that what you really want?”
Jaehyun remains silent as he contemplates his choices.
“Think about it and let me know soon so I can help, I’ll try to calm him down for now.”
He lays a hand on his shoulder and leaves.
———
[3 Days Later]
You finally leave your bed and decide to treat yourself to some coffee from the cafe on campus. Jaehyun never showed up or called so you stopped expecting him to. However, you still thought about him all the time. You missed him so much, but if space is what he wanted, then you were in no position to deprive him of that.
This was your punishment for hurting him.
You stuff your hands in your hoodie and look up at the menu, knowing very well that you’ll just choose what you always do. An iced grande caramel macchiato.
You smile while taking the drink from the barista and look for a seat.
You find your favorite comfy chair in the corner and place your laptop on the table in front of it.
So far, your day is going pretty well. Favorite drink, favorite seat. What else would go right for you?
You needed to distract yourself from thinking of Jaehyun. You take a few sips while reading a novel Bella recommended to you.
Gentle Monsters.
It’s about a woman who runs, literally, into a handsome man that operates a glass conservatory. The catch is he happens to be hiding a dark secret.
Your eyes scan through the pages quickly as the drama gets juicy and then..your laptop screen is pushed down.
“Hey! What the h-“
“Hey..”
Your eyes grow when you see who takes a seat across from you.
“T-Taeyong?”
“Mhm” he smiles while sipping a pink drink. He wore sunglasses and as he tilted his head, you could see remnants of the bruise Jaehyun left him.
“What..are you doing here?”
“Oh, I didn’t know dashingly good looking boys couldn’t be college students too.” He says sarcastically.
“I didn’t know you studied here..so does that mean..you saw my pictures? Did you know about me before we met?”
Your face becomes warm as you lean forward and whisper.
“No..I didn’t..I don’t pay that much attention to what happens on campus to be honest.”
You exhale and relax in your chair.
“And if I had, what would it matter now? I’ve already seen…everything..” he eyes you up and down. His gaze is almost too much to bear and you start to feel like Patrick Starr’s rock home under the sea is the perfect place for you right about now.
“Ugh..” you close your eyes and shake your head. “Please..don’t remind me.”
Taeyong’s mouth falls open. “What? Was it that bad?”
“No..it was..magnificent..you were, I mean, are magnificent..it’s just…”
He chuckles as you stumble over your words.
What could you say? He had an intense aura about him that made you nervous. What made matters worse was the fact that a small part of you wanted to kiss him again.
“Oh..magnificent, I like that.” He says in a growl while running a hand through his luscious brown hair.
For some reason, it felt like you were cheating on Jaehyun again so you looked away quickly. “I’m..sorry about Jaehyun, he shouldn’t have hit you..it’s all my fault.”
He shrugs. “It’s fine..you can just make it up to me later.”
You laugh and look outside the window. “Gosh you’re interesting..”
“And magnificent..” he places his sunglasses on top of his head to wink at you.
“Hey!” A girl stops by your table and squints.
“Aren’t you that girl from the posters?” Her friend beside her snickers.
“Oh..” you look down at the table.
They laugh loudly, and begin to create a scene inside the quiet cafe. “Nice! I guess nothing is left to the imagination anymore! Talk about desperate!”
You swallow hard and tap the table while waiting for them to just walk away. You could’ve gone off on them, but what would that do? They’d only make fun of you as more people look up and start to recognize your face too.
Taeyong grows angry once he sees how upset you look. “What’s so funny? Look, I’d be insecure too when she has a perfect face and body and I look like..” he looks her up and down and grimaces.
“that..” he fakes a total body shiver.
“Better get going, I think Shrek is looking for his long lost cousin.” He says smoothly while giving an evil glare. He puts a finger on his chin and squints. “Congratulations on being the first ogres to be admitted to this school. Yay! diversity!”
You can’t help but laugh.
“Go away now before I call animal control.” he shoos them away.
Damn, he was lethal. You’d hate to be on his bad side.
The girl’s friend scoffs before saying “fuck you..” and walks away.
“I wouldn’t fuck you with the lights off, bitch.”
Your eyes grow.
“Taeyong!”
“What? They’re rude and ugly.” He rolls his eyes.
You found it hot that he’d defend you like this and simply laugh again.
“Anyway, once I found out about Reina’s plan and what she did to you, I left. I want nothing to do with her.” He sips his drink again.
“Yeah..I’m sorry she used you too..”
“Oh don’t be sorry, on the bright side, I got to meet you.”
A moment of silence rests between the two of you.
You nod and start to gather your things.
“Well, I should get going!”
“Y/n..” he says as he touches your hand on the table.
“I’d love to spend time with you again..”
You take your hand away and tuck it into your pocket again.
“Oh..I don’t plan on doing anything like that ever again, I’m sorry.”
Taeyong laughs. “No..of course not like that, get your head out of the gutter…I mean, time like this at a cafe or park, or something..you’re nice to talk to.”
“Oh..shit, I don’t know why I was thinking that like of course you meant just regular time like this, it’s just the way you said it, you know like the way you touched my hand, I-“
He laughs before standing up from the table. “You’re a mess, let me walk you out.”
Taeyong held your hand to help you stand up from the soft chair.
You walked outside together, but said your goodbyes as you headed in different directions.
“Y/n..” he calls out to you as you walk away.
“Yeah?”
“Phone.”
You fish your phone out of your pocket quickly and hand it to him. He smiles from ear to ear as he puts his number into your phone.
“Don’t be shy now, remember I’ve already seen everything..” he leans in close to your ear. “And I love it..”
You gasp as you punch his chest lightly.
“I’ll see you later, sweetheart.”
He waves while trotting away.
You stand there dumbfounded and completely smitten by the man, then you suddenly remember Jaehyun and wonder if these new feelings told you you were over him.
Jaehyun wonders the same thing as he watches from across the street.
He was heading to your place with a bouquet of flowers when he saw you and the man he punched leaving the cafe. He decided to park into a spot a few spaces away and watch your interaction.
You looked..happy. This man made your eyes light up, and the sight was much more painful than watching you get fucked by him.
He now knew that emotions were involved. But did he have any right to be upset? If you decided to move on, why shouldn’t he accept that? You’re doing what’s best for you.
He looks at the flowers in his passenger seat.
He was hurt by everything, but he still felt bad for dragging you into all of this in the first place. He was going to apologize and attempt to prove his worthiness as a boyfriend once more, but after seeing you so happy with another man, he isn’t sure if he had any more chances to take.
A few hours later, you receive a call from campus police.
They positively identified Reina as the person that placed the photos everywhere so they ask if you’d like to press charges for harassment while they charge her for vandalism and breaking into private property.
You nod and say “yes.” The process would be long to convict her of this crime against you, for anyone could argue that you voluntarily took the photos. But you’re determined to teach her and anyone else that thinks of posting “revenge porn” a lesson.
———
[One Week Later]
You finally receive a text from Jaehyun.
Jaehyun to You: I just got a new phone..I’m sorry for taking so long, would you like to go somewhere?
You tremble slightly and respond. You were starting to get used to not hearing from him so this shocked you
You to Jaehyun: yes
You needed to apologize again, but more importantly, you needed to know how Jaehyun felt about you after everything. Does he still want to date you? Could you make this work?
Later that day you meet up at the park.
Jaehyun arrives with Dora and sits on a bench.
You immediately sit down as well and start to per her.
“Y/n..” Jaehyun says with his warm honey voice. You always grow weak when he calls your name.
You look up at him, taking in the brokenness in his eyes
“I’m so sorry, Jaehyun..I..I don’t know what I was thinking.”
Jaehyun shakes his head. “No, I’m sorry. After everything I put you through, I honestly deserved that.”
“Jaehyun..I’m so tired..I don’t know what’s going on anymore, everyone on campus thinks I’m a slut and I feel so dumb and pathetic.” You start to tear up.
“No, they don’t. They’ve already forgotten about it, okay? And come fall semester, absolutely no one will remember you as that girl.”
You sniffle and nod. Thank God for summer break.
“I think..I just need time..it’s all too much.” You look up at him and Jaehyun isn’t sure if you need time away from everything or just time away from him.
He scoots closer to you on the bench and takes your hands in his. “Don’t worry about anything, I’m here for you, okay? We can start over. We can be completely honest with each other this time.”
You look to the sky as he continues.
“Please, y/n, please come back to me. I promise to make it all right.”
If you say yes, I’ll stay, even if that means betraying my father, he thinks to himself.
You still sit quietly and think to yourself.
You loved Jaehyun, but you found yourself second guessing everything, could you truly be like how you once were. Then, there are your wandering eyes and emotions. If you loved him with all your heart, how could you possibly think of another man in that way?
And the question that screamed the loudest was why? Why did Jaehyun click the notification from Reina’s livestream in the first place?
You look back to Jaehyun who anxiously awaits your answer, his eyes glossy with tears.
“Jaehyun…I” you start to cry, you can’t hold back your emotions as you fear that deep down, you already know the answers to all of these questions.
”Do you still love me?” He asks with tears flowing in a steady stream. Your heart breaks to see his lovely eyes so red.
Your mouth falls open.
Why are you hesitating?
“I- '' want to, is what you wanted to say, but just couldn't.
You can’t answer because you know you still don’t trust him. Furthermore, you aren’t sure if you love him or only lust after him.
But still, why is your heart cracking slowly while you both cry? You can almost hear it inside your chest.
Jaehyun nods and stands up before wiping his tears away. “I won’t bother you anymore, y/n..”
“Jaehyun..don’t.” You stand up and grab his hand before he can walk away.
He pulls away and takes Dora’s leash.
Make it easy, lie and rip the band aid off.
He clears his throat. “I actually wanted to meet with you..because I’ve been thinking during our time away from each other…I don’t think I love you anymore…”
And there it was, the sound of your heart finally falling to the ground and breaking into a million pieces that were beyond repair.
You weren’t sure if you loved Jaehyun, but to hear him say he doesn’t love you is a pain unlike any other.
“…and I think it’s time to move on.” He turns away from you, knowing that the look on your face would only make him fall to the ground and sob.
But deep down, he knows he lies because it’s easier for him to decide for you. This was the only way you could move on. He had to make you hate him.
“You and I both know we only use each other for sex…this isn’t love, it never was, and it has no chance of ever being that..that’s why I cheated on you and felt no emotion.”
He turns back to you and speaks sternly. “If we were to date again, I’d probably cheat again in hopes of finding the true love I crave and don’t receive from you..”
His words stung like sharp daggers and you’re pretty sure even Caesar had an easier pain than what you feel right now.
For a few minutes, you are completely speechless and debate whether or not you should argue with him. But instead, you nod and walk away. “Okay Jaehyun, goodbye.”
You can't see your way through the park as water floods your eyeballs. You finally stop at a stream and clutch your chest.
The tears never stop, your head starts hurting and you feel yourself on the verge of a panic attack.
You call Bella who hears your gasps and panic over the phone.
“Take deep breaths! I’ll be right there!”
She rushes from home to get to you while you go dizzy.
Jaehyun has trouble driving home, his teary eyes causing the road to blur. He pulls over and pounds his fist against the steering wheel.
“Fuck!” He yells before holding his face in his hands. He didn’t expect saying goodbye to be so difficult, he didn’t expect to regret it for the rest of his life.
He just broke the heart of his one true love.
———
[A Few Months Later]
“Come on, Dora, let’s get back inside.”
Jaehyun calls after Dora to go back into his mom’s house in Korea.
His mom sits at the table as she goes over the final preparations for his father’s funeral.
The real reason Jaehyun’s father sent for him was because he was ill and only given a few months to live by doctors. He did scold him for creating such scandalous videos, but didn’t spend too much time on it as he had more pressing matters at hand.
Jaehyun deleted all social media and focused on his father’s health as a result. To you, it seemed he had fallen off the face of the Earth.
He trained Jaehyun and taught him some of what he needed to know about the business during his final days alive. Jaehyun was thankful for the opportunity and finally found himself bonding with him after all this time.
“I can teach you all about finances and numbers, Yoon Oh, but I can’t teach you about being passionate about it. At the end of the day, you’ll only regret what you didn’t do for your heart..I guess, that’s why we didn’t see eye to eye before.”
He chuckles before coughing. “It took me getting to this point to realize..All my life, I had no true passion. Nothing worth missing.”
Jaehyun sits at his father’s bedside as he prepares to say goodbye.
He cries while listening to him speak.
“You were always so passionate about art and all this stuff I didn’t understand..I didn’t respect it because I didn’t get it..but what does it matter? It’s about you.. and if it makes your heart happy…if it makes your soul complete, then why should you let it go?”
His father passed away peacefully the next day, leaving Jaehyun with wise words he’d never forget.
A few weeks after the funeral, Jaehyun is tasked with deciding whether or not to stay and gradually take over the business or to go back to college and finish his studies.
Being away from you gave Jaehyun the chance to learn more and think with a clearer mind, hence his decision to go back.
He told his mother he’d be going back only to get his degree, but really, he found his fathers words hard to ignore.
“If it makes your heart happy, if it makes your soul complete..then why should you let it go?”
For Jaehyun, this was about you. He couldn’t fight the urge to love you, he couldn’t just let you go like that.
So he leaves Dora with his mom and heads back.
He knows it will take some time to make up for his shitty actions, but he’d do whatever it takes to love you again, even if that meant watching you from a distance. Just seeing your smile and laugh was enough for him.
He’d complete his studies, but he’d always have you on his mind.
He keeps in touch with your mom without you knowing, that is, until Christmas dinner that year.
He knocks on her door and waits patiently for her to open it. It would be the first time you’d see each other since he broke up with you. It was going to be difficult, but he had to try.
What he didn’t account for was the fact that your mind may have already been set on someone else..the strange, handsome fellow named Sicheng that sat across from him now at the dinner table.
The End
Thank you again for going on this journey with me, i hoped you enjoyed it xoxo - Krys
(Hint: check out the agreement to see what happens during the Christmas dinner hehe)
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