#I’ll try to write how the show goes and adding her in

[emiscringe]

The demons won

*kneels near my OC like it’s a cat, hiding the very blatant hell I’m about to unleash onto her*

Come here pls

[julienbakerstreet]

I’ll never get over what an iconic choice it was to make A Scandal In Bohemia the first Sherlock Holmes short story. A Study In Scarlet and The Sign of The Four had already made Holmes a popular character, but he didn’t truly explode in popularity and become the cultural phenomenon we know and love today until after he started appearing in short stories in The Strand. And for the very first story, Doyle chose to write about a woman outsmarting Holmes. Holmes being a misogynist, underestimating a woman, and learning from it.

It’s such a contrast to the two previous books. In A Study In Scarlet, the only woman who is relevant to the mystery (Lucy Ferrier) serves as motivation for the killer. In the flashback passage, she’s depicted in relation to the men in her life. In The Sign of the Four, Mary Morstan takes a more active role in the mystery, seeking out Holmes and accompanying him and Watson through much of the investigation. She’s a woman who works to support herself and Holmes even praises her intelligence. Yet so much of her relevance to the story (beyond being the daughter of a man involved in a mystery) is Watson’s feelings for her. Additionally, she fits so neatly into the damsel in distress archetype that Doyle references it in-text:

“It is a romance!” cried Mrs. Forrester. “An injured lady, half a million in treasure, a black cannibal, and a wooden-legged ruffian. They take the place of the conventional dragon or wicked earl.” "And two knight-errants to the rescue," added Miss Morstan.

Irene Adler is different. She’s an opera singer at a time when female performers were stigmatized as scandalous. She supports herself independently. She’s described as a “spinster” and an “adventuress” (used as another word for mistress). She had an affair with a King and then goes on to marry a man for no plot reason other than she wants to. She’s familiar with male costume and uses it to “take advantage of the freedom which it gives”— freedom which Victorian women were not normally afforded. She’s a contralto with a deeper voice (it’s worth noting that the most common operatic contralto roles are female villains and women playing men). In sum, she has a lot of traits that would read as unconventional to a Victorian audience. Unlike Mary Morstan and Lucy Ferrier, she doesn’t really embody the ideals of a chaste, refined, and benevolent Victorian woman.

The King of Bohemia describes her as jealous and out to ruin him, but it’s revealed that she isn’t interested in him and only keeps the photo to protect herself from him. Holmes is fascinated by her in a way that a lot of readers construe as romantic, but the text explicitly tells us that his interest in her is platonic. She earns Holmes’s respect and admiration as an equal. While she’s presented as an antagonist when the King of Bohemia first describes her, Holmes ultimately views her as a sympathetic person and the King as a rich asshole trying to control her.

Doyle could have easily written the story so that once Holmes switches his sympathies, he helps Irene and her husband get away from the King. It would have been a better look for Holmes not to get outfoxed by a woman and act (as he does in other stories) as a valiant gentleman always willing to assist a woman being mistreated. But instead, Doyle chose to show Holmes as a flawed character who lets his prejudices cloud his judgment and is beaten at his own game by a woman in his very first Holmes short story.

Furthermore, Irene comes out on top using her intellect, rather than falling into the trope of a woman using seduction to beat a man. She’s also better than Holmes at disguise- something he is very skilled at and prides himself on. The story literally ends with Watson writing “The best plans of Mr. Sherlock Holmes were beaten by a woman's wit. He used to make merry over the cleverness of women, but I have not heard him do it of late.” I find it very interesting that the story starts off with Watson saying how emotions would cloud Holmes’ judgment as a reasoner and ends by showing us how his biases hurt his ability to reason.

Irene exhibits dramatically more agency than Lucy or Mary. She drives the mystery rather than being an element of it. One of the reasons female Sherlockians have historically been inclined to identify with Irene Adler is because while male readers get to identify and project onto Sherlock Holmes, female readers gravitated towards the idea of a woman besting Holmes (in part because of his misogyny), earning his respect as an equal, and making Holmes stop being quite so misogynistic.

One of my adaptation pet peeves with Irene Adler is when “the woman” is used as a negative epithet. In A Scandal In Bohemia, Watson specifically says that it is an honorable title that Holmes uses with respect. Although she’s frequently adapted as a villain/antihero, as James Edward Holroyd wrote, “One may fairly claim that the only dubious and questionable aspect of the adventure was the conduct of the three men principally concerned!”

The overarching theme of The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes is righting social injustices. Of the twelve stories in The Adventures, six of them deal with women in varying degrees of trouble because of men who have power over them (SCAN, IDEN, TWIS, SPEC, NOBL, COPP). Three deal with Holmes clearing people of false allegations (BOSC, BLUE, BERY). Many cases also deal with the theme of rich men acting entitled and getting comeuppance (SCAN, REDH, NOBL; and to a lesser extent TWIS, and SPEC). A Scandal in Bohemia combines these themes. Irene is falsely accused of being jealous and trying to ruin the king. The king has used his resources to harass her repeatedly:

“Five attempts have been made. Twice burglars in my pay ransacked her house. Once we diverted her luggage when she travelled. Twice she has been waylaid."

The King of Bohemia is presented as rude, arrogant, and entitled, with Holmes flat-out telling him that Irene Adler is on a higher level than him, despite being of a lower social standing.

A Scandal in Bohemia is also unconventional in the fact that it’s not really a traditional mystery where Holmes is hired to help solve a crime. It was an odd choice for Doyle to reintroduce his detective to readers in this story on so many levels, and I think that’s why it tends to be one of the most popular Holmes stories. It shows Holmes as human and flawed, a man who can recognize his blindspots and grow from them. But of course, the enduring popularity of SCAN is primarily due to Irene Adler herself. Sherlockian spaces have traditionally been male-dominated, with the Baker Street Irregulars only allowing women to join in 1991, 100 years after the publication of SCAN. Although Irene only made one appearance in canon, she captured the hearts and imaginations of so many Holmes fans, and gave female fans assurance that they have an equal claim to everything that Holmes embodies.

[samandcolbyownme]

CAN YOU PLEASE WRITE ZACH JUSTICE STORIES I NEED THEM SO BAD!!😭😭

Summary: Drunk reader gets a confidence boost, thanks to tequila.

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, mentions of alcohol, lightweight Zach, fully willing/consensual drunk and unprotected sex, hair pulling, biting, scratching, hair pulling, dirty talk, creampie (oops), general filth

Word count: 2.5k | not edited

“Come on, Zach.” You plead, hand sliding up his arm to grip his shoulder, “Just one shot with me?”

His eyes scan over your hand and up your arm to your face, “You don’t really mean it when you say just one, do you?”

You smile, already feeling kind of tipsy, “You can’t say no to me.”

A smirk plays with his lips, “I can saw whatever I want to you.”

“Will you pleeease take a shot with me, Zachary?” You pout your lip, giving him your best doe eyes with the added batting of your lashes.

“Yes.”

“Wait, really?”

He leans in, lips brushing against your ear as he whispers, “I just wanted to see you beg.” He goes to turn but stops, “You looked so hot doing it, too.”

You feel your cheeks turn warm, if you were sober, you would have walked away from him by now, laughing it off like usual.

“Oh yeah?” You look up at him, “Well, I think you’re hot in general.”

He looks taken aback by your words for a split second before he rolls with, “Of course you do, I’m Zach Justice.” He laughs and you roll your eyes, “If Zach Justice wants to come home with y/n y/l/n after this, I suggested ordering us a shot.”

His brows raise, “Huh?”

You chew on the inside of your lip as you smirk, “You heard me.”

“Did I?” He gives you a wink before turning to the bartender, “Two shots of..” he looks at you and you smirk, “tequila.”

Zach’s eyes about pop out of his head before he looks back at the bartender, “Tequila.”

He nods and Zach looks back at you, “Why do I let you do that?” You smile, playing it off, “What ever do you mean, Zach?”

The bartender places the glasses down and you hand him your card, “You can leave it open.” He nods and walks away.

“You know how to do these right?” You tease and Zach licks his lips, “I think, you should show me first, I’ll buy you another one to take with me.”

“You’re trying to get me drunk, aren’t you?” You laugh and Zach watches as you lick the back of your hand slightly so the salt can stick to your skin.

“Kinda seems like you’re already there because you’re no longer the shy, quiet, tease. You’re just teasing me.”

“Shy.. quiet tease.. and now..” you look over at him, licking the salt off the back of your hand before you down the shot, a line wedge between your teeth quickly follows.

Zach stares at you and you smirk, “Did you catch that, or do you need to watch me do it again?”

“I picked up on it the first time, sweetheart.” He scoffs, biting down on his lip when you bring the back of his hand up to lick it before adding a dash of salt, “Your turn.”

He clenches his jaw from being slack, tilting his head as what you just did makes him want to take you home right now, “I see what you’re doing.”

“What am I doing?” You tilt your head and he smirks, “Living up to the nickname I gave you.” You watch as he licks the salt, knocks back the tequila, and finishes with a lime.

You bite down on your lip, “As soon as you take me home, I won’t have to be.” You stand up and Zach whines, “Wait, where are you going?”

You look at him, “Going to find the others.” You smooth your hands over your mini dress, “You coming?”

“You’re not going anywhere in here without me.” He stands up, hand immediately going to the small of your back. Zach doesn’t drink much, like at all, so he was classified as a major lightweight - he was feeling kinda good after that shot.

By the time you walked over to the other side of the bar, you see Tara’s eyes light up as she points, screaming, “No fuckin way! No fucking way!”

“What what what?” Jared asks and Tara laughs, “Did he do it?” You laugh, sitting down next to her as you nod, “Oh yeah, he did it.”

“Did what?” Jared asks, “What the fuck did Zach do now!?”

Zach whips his head over to Jared, “So I had one tequila shot, big whoop. Sue me.”

Jared eyes go wide and his mouth drops, “Tequila!? Oh my god. No you didn’t!”

You nod, “He sure did.”

“How did you get him to do that?” Alyssa asks and before you can answer, Zach cuts you off, “She batter her lashes at me and told me i was just soo hot to her.”

Your mouth drops open, “Thanks, Zach.”

“I’ll make it up to you later.” He smirks, giving you a wink and you smirk, looking away, “In my, defense. He could have always changed the order. Or said no, so.”

“Well, I guess we know who’s taking care of Zach.” Jared laughs and Tara leans in, “Fuckin’ get it girl. Hell yeah!”

You lean in, “Thank god for the liquid confidence boost.” She nods, “Totally get what you mean.” Zach leans over and looks between you and Tara, “I like secrets.”

“Yeah, and I bet you like y/n, too.” She laughs and he nods, “That’s only if she likes me back.” He says it like you’re not even there, making you laugh, “I need more to drink.”

——

An hour later, you’re on the dance floor, Zach holding your hips against him as you move to the beat of the music.

His grip tightens and you turn around, arms going around his neck. You look up at him, smiling as you see him smile.

His hands slide around to the small of your back, pulling you into him, “You ever pull an Irish goodbye?”

“A what?” You laugh and he slides his hand into yours, “I’ll show you.” He laughs and pulls you through the crowd, leading you outside and down the side walk.

You look back laughing harder as you lay your hand on the bed of his elbow, “So you just leave without saying bye?”

He nods, laughing, “Yes ma’am.”

You shake your head and giggle as he pulls you into him, taking a few steps forward with his arms around you. You smile, tilting your head as he kisses your neck, “You know..” he starts out, “I’ve wanted you for so long.”

“Well, looks like you finally going to have me.” You say lowly, turning around to pull him with you as you walk backwards.

“You’re not just doing this because you’re drunk, right?” He asks, making you stop, “Do you really think I don’t like you?”

His eyes look from your eyes to your lips before you both lean in, having a heated, slightly drunken kiss in the middle of the city.

“Mkay. How far from the hotel are we?” Zach asks and you point across the street, “I don’t think we’re far at all.”

“Look at you navigating your way to pound town.”

You lose it, covering your mouth as you laugh loudly, “Zach! Theres people around.” You playfully smack his shoulder and he shrugs, “I feel bad for whoever on the other side of the hotel room.”

You smile, seeing the crosswalk turn green and Zach pulls you, running across the white striped walkway, laughing as he pulls you to him.

You were way more drunk than Zach was, he stopped after half of his third, he had you finish it.

You get in to the elevator and Zach pushes you up against the walls hands on your waist as his lips find yours.

Your hands go to his neck and you moan against his lips. He pushes his hips into yours, groaning as his cock rubbing up against you, “I need you.”

You nod, “P-please.”

The elevator dings and you’re being pulled into his hotel room not even thirty seconds later.

His lips find yours again as both of your hands travel each other’s bodies, unbuttoning buttons, unzipping zippers. You kick your heels off as you step out of your dress that’s pooled over them.

“You are literally so fucking sexy. C’mere.” He lifts you up, legs wrapping around his bare waist before he lays you down on the bed, hand going down to slip two fingers into you.

You gasp at the sudden feeling, back arching as you squeeze your walls around his fingers, “Fuck.” You breathe out, looking up at him.

His fingers slowly thrusts in and out of you a few times, curling upward which makes your roll your hips with a moan, “Fuck, Zach.. please.”

His lips find the skin on your neck, nipping and biting as he keeps working your cunt, gasping at husband thumb brushing over your clit every so often.

“I can already tell you’re going to feel so good around me.” He groans as you reach down, pumping his cock with your hand a few times, “Need you, baby.” You whimper, “P-please.”

“The begging, babe, fuck.” He kisses up to your ear, “makes me weak.”

He pulls his fingers out and you can feel his cock slowly taking their place. Your hands go to his shoulders, digging your nails in as you wrap your legs around his waist, “Oh my g-“

Your eyes roll back as he bottoms out, a gasp leaving your throat as you feel his hand slide up to squeeze your neck, “Feel so fucking good.”

His lips crash into hours, a heated make out underway as he slowly retracts his hips and slams into you. You moan into his mouth, nails dragging up and down his back as he brings you closer to climax.

“Fuuuck.” You whine loudly, walls clenching around him, “S-so close. So close.” You whimper out, laying your hand on his and squeezing.

He smirks, shaking his head as he squeezes harder, “You like that, hmm?” He gasps lowly in your ear, “Cum for me, sweetheart.”

That’s all it took, Zach’s command had you squirming, in a good way, underneath him. His cock guides you through your high, moaning when your nails lightly drag over the scratches that are already there.

He moves his hand from your neck, using it to cup your cheek as he rests his forehead against yours, “Should have made you mine a long time ago.”

You nod quickly, squeezing his cock as you feel another orgasm coming on, “Fuck, flip flip please.”

Zach nods and rolls over, pulling you with so now you’re on top. He throws his head back, hands gripping your ass tight as you slam your hips down, leaning forward to kiss him.

“Gonna cum for me again, huh?” His one hand slides up your back, pulling you down to him. You whimper against his lips, “Y-yes.”

He thrusts his hips upward, not knowing that his own release was right around the corner, “Fuck I’m not-“ Zach groans, throwing his head back as you cum on his cock again, “That’s it, fuck.”

Zach groans, sliding a hand up to the side of your neck as you keep bouncing, “Where do you want me to cum?”

Also thanks to tequila, “Don’t stop. Don’t stop.” You gasp out, one hand tangling into his hair as you cum with him this time.

He pushes your hips down, thrusting up into you as his cum floods into your satisfied cunt, “Fuck, fuck.” He groans, “shit.”

You let out a sigh, laying on his chest as it heaves you up and down, “Why didn’t we do this sooner?” You giggle looking up at him.

He shrugs, giving your forehead a kiss, “I genuinely didn’t think you actually liked me.” You laugh rolling off of him, “Well you can stop thinking that and come with me to get a shower.”

He up and walking over to you, “Marry me.”

“I’ll accept a blue raspberry ring pop and blue raspberry only.” You point to him and he raises his brows, “Noted.”

—

Your eyes opened, squinting at the sunlight peaking through the curtains. You slowly roll over, letting out a slow and quiet breath as you blinking a few times before staring up at the ceiling of the hotel room.

You were more or less convincing yourself not to heave up everything you consumed last night - which was a little bit over your limit.

You looked over at Zach, smiling slightly until you remembered what happened last night and just how many times.

Your body literally aches. You have a literal hangover from hell, and you needed to pee. You push yourself up slowly, grabbing his shirt from the floor before making your way to the bathroom.

You pinch the bridge of your nose, letting out a sigh as you flick the lights on. Your all fall on the shower and what happened there, instantly replays in your head.

You let out a moan as he slips into you from behind, your pussy dripping from just a few minutes ago. You reach back, looking for his hand, his arm, something.

He pins your hand down to your lower back, leaning forwards as he pushes his cock all the way in, “You feel so fucking good.”

You moan out at his words, other hand sliding down the steam filled shower door, “Fuck, yes yes yes.” He sucks a mark into your skin, right where people could see if you moved your hair just right, “You’re talking me so good, baby.”

“Y/n?”

“Bathroom.” You call back out before finishing up. As you’re washing your hands, there’s a knock on the door and you look over as it opens, “Thought you left.”

You shake your head, drying your hands on the towel, “Pretty sure we’re a thing now right?” You glance over at him and smirk.

He smirks, nodding as he sees his shirt on your body, “Keep that. I like it better on you.” You look down, grabbing the hem of the shirt, “Are you sure?”

He nods, “Yes.”

You walk over, “Oo. My boyfriend’s first stolen clothing item. Oh, no wait..” Zach looks at you confused, and you smirk, “I have that black knit looking crew neck. It’s in my suitcase actually.”

“I’ve been loo-“ he scoffs with a smirk, “When, how, and why did you?”

“I was going to wear it to the podcast one of these days. See if you noticed.” You smile and he just shakes his head, “Why didn’t I think of that?”

He huffs, laughing as he pulls you in for a kiss, “So you are my girlfriend right?” You kiss him again, “Only if you’re my boyfriend?”

He smirks, nodding his head, “Yeah, I think I can do that.” He smiles up at you and you bite your lip, “How much time do we have before they’re banging on your door?”

“Our door, this is your room now, too, babe,” Zach corrects you and you smile, “Sorry, how long do-“

“I don’t care.” Zach says as he lifts you up, “They can wait.”

——

I really loved writing this for some reason, I have no idea, but let me know what you think! As always, thanks so much for reading! I love you all so much!

Also, I’m sooo close to 3k followers! Thank you all so so much, again!

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

[pennyellee]

preview

LACRIMOSA | MYG MAFIA YANDERE AU

pairings: mafia leader!yoongi x f!reader genre: mafia!au, yandere au, historical au

summary: Their interlocking gaze served as a butterfly effect on his heart, stirring it to the core. She, in turn, only dreams to find a way to escape. But perchance, over time she might forcefully learn to love the man who has taken so much from her.

Thus unfolds a twisted tale of love and loss, of hope and despair, of life and death. The music reverberated through the dimly-lit streets. Tears of sorrow, weeping symphony - reflects the hurt, the scars that linger deep within and the wounds that never healed. Lacrimosa.

warnings: minors dni 18+ | mafia au, dark!yoongi, mafia!yoongi, smut, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, yandere, threatening, kidnapping, partial religious behaviour, graphic violence, graphic depictions of torture, manipulation, possessive/obsessive behaviour, angst, implied non-con, minor character death, spanking, blood, gaslighting (more to be added)

word count: 655

author’s note: yaaaaaay!! can't believe I actually made it to post a fanfic I desperately wanted to write for two whole years now. I am very much excited to share this preview from one of the chapters ♥ I'm rising from the dead when it comes to writing fics, so excuse any ridiculous mistake I make, I'll always try to look into it backwards. Lastly a big thank you goes to Bex @chaoticpuff17 who not only inspired me to write but constantly showed me love and support, therefore I would love to express my unending gratitude and admiration, love you baby ♥ lots of love, 𝖕𝖊𝖓𝖓𝖞𝖊𝖑𝖑𝖊

m.list CHAPTER I

“You crave the throne don’t you?” she asked cocking her head and chin defiantly, her narrowed eyes fixed on him. “I want you too.” She chuckled at his response. “I'm merely a convenient excuse, am I not?” Y/N smiled too sweetly. “You’ll kill m—” he rose from his chair, not even letting her finish. Grabbing her by her shoulders in steel grip with a penetrating gaze.

The fragile cup slipped from her trembling hands and shattered on the floor, a nearby maid prepared to clean up the shattered shards. “Leave us!” he barked at the startled girl, his voice filled with anger. Y/N's eyes widened. He was even more aggressive and intimidating than before.

“I could—” his voice seething with fury, “— I could gather man and slaughter your entire clan keeping you as a trophy, a symbol of my power.” The threat hung in the air, and she could feel the tears welling up in her eyes. Fear was coursing through her, yet she resisted letting it control her.

“Matter of fact—” he continued, his grip tightening on her shoulders, eliciting a whimper of pain from her, “—you will be a symbol of the magnitude my power has, no matter if your father and family remain alive. So it’s on you. The fate of your kin rests in your hands. Their survival hinges on your decisions and how well you’ll cooperate.” He tightened his grip again, eliciting another whimper of pain from her.

“But I will never dispose of you.” he growled through gritted teeth, his tone a mixture of possessiveness and frustration. Gathering her courage, she managed to speak again, her voice trembling but filled with resolve.

“You cannot manipulate me like this. You think I’ll fall for this fucked up scheme? I have spent my entire life under the orders of others, forbidden from making choices for myself! And you have the audacity to use my innocence thinking I will willingly crawl into your bed and love you like a devoted lover.” Venom in her voice and the desperate tone made fall for her even more.

“I've only recently met you, so spare me your attempts to deceive me that you’re being my saviour.” Y/N has enough fire to still conquer and fight him back. “I refuse to be a passive participant in this game.” She shall not take it lying down.

“I'm giving you a choice—” he asserted, his voice laced with a dangerous undertone “—either you’ll walk down the aisle to me or there will be a bloodshed. I won’t send you back to your father nor will I relinquish you easily.” His eyes locked onto hers, and she could see the darkness consuming his pupils when anger consumed him.

“Call it love, obsession, or whatever you please, but no matter what imbecile attempts you make to fight or flee, we will inevitably end up together nonetheless," he declared with conviction. Was this the fate God had laid out for her? Her faith wavered, and if he didn't provide assistance soon she shall forbid him altogether.

“You just want to fuck m—” he cut her off abruptly, his voice low and seductive.

“I can either fuck you hard or I can make love to you,” said he, whilst setting her left arm free and sliding his to her thigh, caressing it sweetly.

Breathing started to become harder for Y/N. Unfamiliar sensations welled up in her lower belly whilst his touch was sending shivers through her body. Was this attraction? Excitement? Mother told her this is how love is supposed to feel like. Butterflies in her stomach. But she certainly wasn't in love with her captor.

He sensed her confusion and distress. Leaving her fall back to the chair. Finally letting her breathe freely. Yoongi sat back to his chair, collecting himself and his three peace suit he wears today.

“Loss of words, innit?” He chuckled.

.

.

.

.

coming soon CHAPTER I

©pennyellee. please do not repost

disclaimer: this story is purely fictional, it does not depict real-life events or involve any actual members of BTS. This story will contain depictions of violence, blood shed, death, mentions of abuse, smoking, alcohol drinking, illegal activities, old social norms and traditions, which we do not condone.

taglist: @chaoticpuff17 @honsoolgloss

[apothe-roses]

I Wanna Ride

Modern Aemond Targaryen x Reader

Part 3

Previous Part | Next Part

Summary: the deal is struck between you and Aemond

Warnings: none, really

A/N: Sorry this took so long! I’ve been really busy with work, and this part was kinda hard to write. That’s also why this is shorter

Word Count: 1.6k

“And he didn’t tell you what he wanted?” Aly looks over at you while adding a slice of turkey to the sandwich she’s making? You shake your head. It had been a few days since everything went down, yet you were still trying to wrap your head around it all. The fact that Aemond would consider helping you at all—foreboding debt aside—just didn’t make sense to you.

“Why does he have to be so cryptic and spooky,” Aly asks, adding a generous amount of mayo to the sandwich.

“Beats me,” you reply. A shout startles you both out of your conversation. You and Aly turn your heads to the living room area. Benji Blackwood and his two friends Kermit and Oscar Tully—“the muppets” as Aly likes to call them—are sprawled across Aly’s couch, cursing at a video game they’re thoroughly engrossed in.

“Oi! You tryin’ to wake your dad up?” Aly calls to them. Currently, Aly’s brother Sam was down the hall, trying to sleep off a migraine. The boys cringe slightly.

“Sorry,” one of the Tully boys stage whispers back to Aly. She sighs. “Anyways, lunch is ready.” In a flash, the boys were on their feet, making their way to the kitchen. Aly pushes the sandwich with the mayo mountain towards Benji.

“Would you like some sandwich with your mayo?” She teases. Benji scowls back, but his expression quickly morphs into a grin. The boys make their way back to the couch. Aly turns to you.

“Listen, if he tries to pull anything with you, just say the word and I’ll kick his ass. Then I’ll call Cregan and he’ll also kick his ass.” You laugh in response. “What’s his deal with them anyways? Are they friends?”

“Acquaintances is more like it. They get along well enough, but Creg’s friendship with Jace sorta puts him on thin ice.”

“…Yeah, I still don’t get it.”

“Look, rich people friendships are weird, okay?” Aly explains. “Sometimes it’s better if you don’t ask questions and just go with it. I find the truth usually comes out on its own time.” She starts resealing containers and putting them in the fridge. You follow suit, deciding to take her advice. You two clean in silence for a couple minutes, until your phone buzzes. You look at the name on the screen, suddenly feeling very nervous.

You show the conversation to Aly. Her eyebrows raise, and she notes the tense expression on your face. “You know you don’t have to do this right? I’m sure I could find some time to give you lessons.”

You think about it for a moment. Aly would certainly be a nicer teacher than Aemond. But her Raven is much different than your Meraxes. Plus, you’d be lying if you said you weren’t looking for an excuse to learn more about the enigmatic, handsome Targaryen.

“I don’t want to cut into your time with your family. I know how important it is to you,” you tell her. “Besides, we’re all adults. I can handle a little tough love.”

“Alright then. Lemme know if you change your mind,” Aly relents, leaving the kitchen. You turn back to your phone to text Aemond.

Saturday morning comes far too soon, and you find yourself heading back to Aemond and Aegon’s shop in the passenger seat of Aly’s truck. One of the doors is rolle up, and you can see Aemond working on a bike. He lifts his head when he hears the engine.

“Well,” you breathe, “here goes nothing.”

“Remember, I’m only a text away,” Aly reassures you. You grin then exit out the passenger side door. Before you turn away, you see Aly glare at Aemond, pointing at her eyes then at him before making a u-turn and driving off. You take a deep breath, then walk over to Aemond. By now, he’s standing and wiping his hands with a cloth. He’s wearing the same outfit as when you two first met, only this time the coveralls are unzipped with the sleeves tied around his waist. The white singlet he’s wearing does nothing to hide the definition of his chest or arms. A few streaks of grime decorate his body, along with a few tattoos. He’s not overtly bulky, but he’s definitely in shape. His biceps flex slightly as he cleans his hands; you try not to bite your lip.

You both stand in awkward silence, waiting for someone to break it. You decide to bite the bullet yourself.

“Where’s Aegon,” you ask, peering into the garage, but there’s no sign of Aemond’s brother.

“He doesn’t typically come in on weekends,” Aemond answers. “Prefers to sleep in.”

“Oh.” You’d hoped he’d be here; his easygoing nature could’ve served as a good mediator.

“So I take it you’re interested?” It takes a moment for you to realize he meant the training.

“Oh I’m yeah. But I want to know what exactly you’re hoping to get out of this,” you reply quickly. Get your shit together you mentally chastise yourself. He’s not worth it.

“Hmm, yes. I’ve been going back and forth on what I want from you,” he starts, setting the rag on a nearby workbench. He turns his back on you.

“And you’ve decided on…” you prompt. He drums his fingers on the table, silent. Then…

“The Conqueror’s Gala. I need someone to go with me,” he states. That’s it? He needs a date to some fancy event? You thought you’d have to do something like clean his house or shine his bike for a month. Not this.

“If you want me to pretend to be your girlfriend, Targaryen-“

“No. Gods no. Nothing like that.” Aemond hastily replies. “My mother is always on my as about bringing a date. Normally, I’d just go with Helaena, but this year she’s decided to side with mum. They want me to prove that I’m capable of spending time with people I’m not directly related to.” His mouth presses into a thin line, and he averts his gaze. He starts drumming his fingers again. It looks like that’s something he does when he’s agitated. You let the silence simmer, silently enjoying the way his jaw clenched.

“Hmmm. I suppose I could spare one evening to get all dressed up and rub elbows with the Westerosi elite,” you sigh in pretend annoyance. He gives you a disgruntled look. “Trust me. It’s not the fun time you think,” he says sharply. Of course a cryptic like him wouldn’t enjoy social events. You try not to laugh at the thought.

“Well, fun or not, I’ll take it,” you tell him. His shoulders relax a little.

“Good,” he says stiffly. “Shall we?” he gestures his hand towards the bike. You realize it’s his own, the bronze coloring of the Vaghar catching the late morning light. You make your way over and take your seat. The bike has the same controls as your Meraxes, but his has extra side mirrors affixed.

Aemond leans over you, one hand on the handlebar and the other on the seat behind you. It takes all your willpower not to gawk at his arm.

“Alright,” Aemond says softly. “Now I want you to start the engine.”

You turn and look at him, incredulous. “You think I don’t know how to start a bike?”

Aemond levels a flare at you. “I’m just being thorough.” You scoff and roll your eyes, but you do as he says.

“Good,” he muses. He’s inches from your ear. The soft timbre of his voice sends a shudder through you. “Now what?” You choke out. You hate the effect he has on you.

“I want you to shift to first gear,” he instructs. All you can do is obey blindly.

“Good. Good,” he praises. He has you go through all the gears and how to break, giving a little praise each time you do something correct. It’s all painfully easy, and you should be insulted he’s making you prove such basic knowledge. Instead, you silently relish the rush of warmth you get with each praise. Hell, you’re almost tempted to get something wrong on purpose just to see how he’ll react? Would he gently explain the correction, or would he go back to being rude and insult you?

“Well then,” Aemond says, pushing off his bike. You mourn the loss of his warmth on your shoulder. “It seems you really do know the basics.” He drawls the last part. Oh yeah, that’s what it’s like when he insults you. You get off the bike, and he starts to wheel it into the garage. “But the Dragon Rally isn’t for the feint of heart. You’ll need to be able to ride long distances in potentially rough weather. You need to be adaptable, ready to make a decision at a moment’s notice. And that’s not even including the Rally itself.”

“What happens at the Rally?” you ask.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” Aemond replies, turning his back on you. You scoff. “Yes. I would. That’s why I asked”

He smirks. “All you need to know is that you need to build up your endurance. I’d like to take you on a ride through the Kingswood when you’re next available. Once you’re comfortable, we’ll take more challenging treks. Sound good?”

You nod your head. At least you won’t have to have weird conversations with him when riding.

“Good. Check your schedule, and give me your next available date,” he says before pulling the garage door closed in your face.

You stand there in stunned silence. What the fuck is up with this guy?

You text Aly, and a few minutes later her truck pulls up to the sidewalk.

“Well that was quick,” she observes as you put on your seatbelt.

“You’re telling me,” you reply, looking back at the garage as Aly pulls away.

You were confused. You were intrigued. Something told you this was only the tip of the iceberg that was Aemond Targaryen.

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Taglist: @valeskafics @carriellie @let-love-bleeds-red @wintrr13 @queenofshinigamis @seabasscevans @fangirlninja67 @toodlesxcuddles @almostpurplelady @goldenpanda16 @aemonds-fire @yentroucnagol @tssf-imagines @n4tforlife @mooncalvin @julczimozart @kezibear

Bold means I couldn’t tag you

[claymoresword]

I Choose Her | Chp: 11

Hermione Granger x Slytherin Fem!Reader

Summary: You are the daughter of known death eaters from one of the richest and oldest wizarding family. Are you prepared to abandon everything you know for Hermione Granger?

Pairing: Hermione x Reader

Wordcount: 4.6k

Warnings: angst, fluff, smut (?), mention of death and violence, sorry to any ron enjoyers out there

Note: halfway through writing this chapter i realised how im really giving ron the short end of the stick in this story lmao i hope y'all don't mind i'll try to go easier on him

this one is more plot driven than usual but i added fluffy hermione x reader moments to make up for it hopefully its still enjoyable!

alright that's it as usual i hope y'all like this one :)

(btw sneaked in a little hermione pov let me know if u like or hate it 👀)

taglist: @gvrsto @aweidlich @xxsekhmet @arielj @poppyflower-22 @scarleigh1989 @smut-religiously777 @coralieesau @blackbirdv98

An hour had passed now since Hermione agreed to cut Harry's hair and you had merely been sat in the corner, spectating.

Truth be told it was a rather fascinating sight to witness Hermione Granger struggle at something.

She snips another section of hair off, leaving an uneven patch. She winces and you couldn’t fight the snicker that slips out of your lips.

Harry throws you a worried expression and your girlfriend only glares at you.

With the pair of scissors in her hand, she points it at you.

“Alright that’s it. You either be quiet or wait outside until I finish this.” Hermione warns.

You raise your hands up in surrender pursing your lips to avoid bursting into laughter.

“Okay I’ll be quiet, I’m sorry.”

Hermione looks less than convinced but eventually goes back to cutting Harry’s hair.

A few minutes past and you decide you wanted to get a proper look. Standing up, you leaned over Hermione’s shoulder.

Seeing the state of Harry’s hair now only causes you to let out a hysterical laugh.

Harry reaches back, fumbling as he finally had a feel of the uneven patches on his head.

Hermione slaps your arm harshly but it does nothing to subdue your laughter.

“Y/n, you’re being so rude.” She whines, a pout forming on her lips.

“I’m sorry but you’re truly terrible at this.”

You say, finally recovering from your laughing fit.

Harry stands up and glances at you for a moment, the look on his face shows he agrees with your statement.

“I think that’ll do for now Hermione, thank you.” Harry tries his best to be polite but he isn’t fooling anyone.

You take a seat again and watches as Hermione slams the pair of scissors against the table.

A petulant look on her face, you can’t help but feel at fault.

You held out your arms, gesturing for her to sit on your lap.

“My love come here, I’m sorry.”

Hermione was reluctant for a moment, but inevitably situates herself on your lap, looping her arm over your shoulder.

You leaned in to place a kiss against her jaw, you attempt to plant one on her lips but she was quick to turn her head.

“You’re great at a lot of other things sweetheart, maybe just avoid a hairdressing career in the future.” You try to reassure her but Hermione makes no effort to look at you.

Reaching up, you began massaging her shoulder absentmindedly and she welcomes the feeling.

“I didn’t mean to make you feel bad, I’m sorry.” You repeat.

Finally turning to you she leans in, capturing your lips with hers.

Moving your own hand to the back her neck as you deepened the kiss. Your lips were against hers for several moments before Harry can be heard clearing his throat.

He turns to walk out of the tent but Hermione was quick to stop him.

“Hang on Harry, we have something to tell you.”

Your girlfriend looks at you signalling for you to continue.

“Last night, Hermione and I figured something out regarding the horcruxes.”

Harry is now intrigued, he steps closer, folding his arms before giving you his full attention.

“What about the horcruxes?”

“Well, we figured out how to destroy it.” Hermione stands up to grab the book you were reading the night prior.

Handing it to Harry, she waits for him to skim the page before explaining.

“Harry, you destroyed Tom Riddle’s diary with a basilisk fang.”

“But before that you killed the basilisk with the sword of Gryffindor. The blade was then impregnated with it’s venom.” Hermione says.

“That’s why Dumbledore left the sword to you in his will, it can destroy horcruxes.” You add.

“That’s brilliant! You’re brilliant– the both of you!” Harry exclaims and you swear you have never seen him so excited before.

“There’s only one problem ofcourse–”

Harry stops talking as the lights in the tent go out for a moment and you instinctively move to stand next to Hermione.

“The sword was stolen.” Ron states, stepping inside the tent. He holds out Dumbledore’s deluminator and the lights quickly come back on.

“That’s right, I’m still here. But you three carry on, don’t let me spoil the fun.”

You roll your eyes, Ron truly picks his timings.

“What’s wrong?”

Harry asks with a deadpan tone, evidently feeling as annoyed.

“Wrong? Nothing’s wrong. Not according to you anyway.” Ron says.

“Look if you have something to say don’t be shy, spit it out.” Harry slams the book closed, stepping closer to Ron.

“Alright I’ll spit it out.”

“But don’t expect me to be grateful just because there’s another damn thing we’ve got to find.” He says, glaring at you.

You feel Hermione grab your hand.

“We’re supposed to be out there destroying these things but now it seems you prefer sitting around playing house with a traitor instead.” He accuses.

“Traitor?” You grimaced at the insult.

Hermione moves her hand up your arm but it does nothing to soothe you.

“I’m sorry, but what part of this isn’t living up to your expectations? Did you think we’d be staying in a 5 star hotel? Finding a Horcrux every other day? Did you think you’d be back with your mum by Christmas?” Harry raises his voice.

“I thought you knew what you were doing I thought Dumbledore would’ve told you something worthwhile.”

Harry rolls his eyes and you grow increasingly agitated yourself.

“I’ve told you everything Dumbledore told me and incase you haven’t noticed we have found a Horcrux already.”

“Yeah, and we’re as close to getting rid of it as we are to finding the rest of them aren’t we?”

Hermione releases your arm, walking towards Ron she attempts to take the necklace off him but he pushes her off harshly.

“Please take the necklace off, you wouldn't be saying any of this if you hadn’t been wearing it all day.”

He pushes her away again.

“And what about you? When are you going to snap out of it Hermione? Can’t you see she’s just using you to help the Dark Lord? I don’t get why you still believe she is on our side. She doesn’t love you.”

Ron practically spits the last sentence, pointing in your direction.

The sight of tears welling up in Hermione’s eyes set you off.

Storming towards them you quickly shoved Ron, his back hitting the pillar, you kept him pinned against it with your forearm. He tries to fight you off but the adrenaline coursing through you allows you more strength than him.

“Take the Horcrux off.” You ordered him calmly even though it took everything in you not to choke him out.

Reaching up he removes the necklace, roughly throwing it onto the ground. You release him from your hold but he makes no effort to walk away, keeping eye contact with you.

A challenge you gladly accepted.

“What is it Weasley? Are you going to hit me?” You taunt.

You notice as his jaw clenched in response. He glances at Harry one last time before storming out of the tent.

The sound of Hermione sniffling finally urges you to look at her. You catch her trying to wipe away her tears on her sleeve.

“Oh, Hermione come here.”

You stepped closer, pulling her in for an embrace and Hermione doesn’t fight it. You feel her sobbing against your shoulder and it shatters you.

════════════════════════════════════════════

Your impromptu walk along the lake with Hermione had somehow turned into you teaching her how to skip rocks.

She’d been glum since the argument with Ron yesterday and the fact that he had apparated to Merlin knows where in the dead of the night only made things worse.

“Come on, try again you’ll get it.”

Hermione throws the rock and it makes a large splash in the water.

“This isn’t working.” Hermione groans turning around to leave but you stop her with your hand on her arm.

“No, baby you’re doing really well. It’s just your stance is all wrong.”

You say, picking up a smaller stone before moving to stand behind her.

You handed her the stone and carefully guided her arm up. Your hand still over hers, you leaned in to plant a kiss against her neck before whispering directly into her ear.

“Bend your knees a bit.”

Hermione does as she’s told, the blush forming on her cheeks doesn’t go unnoticed by you.

“Good girl.” You smile.

“Now lean back slightly.”

“Release the stone when I say.”

Hermione nods and you guided her arm backwards and then rapidly forward.

“Now.”

She let’s go of the rock and it flings towards the water, skipping twice before sinking. A clear improvement from before.

Hermione smiles widely.

“I can’t believe I did it!” She exclaims.

You chuckled before clapping your hands, applauding her.

“Well done, I knew you could do it.”

Hermione turns to you, wrapping her arms around your neck.

“You’re a great teacher.”

She says directly against your lips. Your girlfriend doesn’t allow you the chance to respond before eliminating any distance between her lips and yours.

Your lips have been on hers thousands of times in a hundred different ways but somehow every kiss still felt like the first.

Hermione tracing circles against your neck made you giddy, you never wanted this feeling to end.

The distant sound of footsteps on gravel urged the both of you to turn around.

Harry can be seen approaching you with his rug sack hanging on his shoulders.

“We need to keep moving, Hermione.”

A pause before your girlfriend responds.

“Any sign of Ron?” She asks and Harry merely shakes his head.

“Okay.” Her voice was quiet.

Harry begins walking away and Hermione follows, she tugs on your arm but you don’t budge.

The look Hermione’s giving you now is one you had been dreading all morning.

“I can’t come Hermione, I have to go back to my parents.”

Your girlfriend sighs and you reach forward holding her face in your hands.

“I will find you again I promise.” You reassure, looking directly into her eyes which are now glossy with unshed tears.

“I hate this.” Hermione grips your coat and you lean in to kiss her deeply.

“Listen, when all of this ends I will never leave your side again.”

“If all of this ends.” She says.

You place a firm hand against her jaw, lifting her head slightly forcing her to look at you.

“Don’t say that. We will defeat him.”

Moving your thumb you stroked her cheek gently and your girlfriend closes her eyes at the sensation.

“And try not to worry about Ron, he’ll turn up I’m sure.”

Hermione nods but doesn’t say anything else, only wrapping her arms around you to pull you into a hug.

“After everything we’ve done so far it can’t be for nothing.”

You say before giving her a gentle peck on the forehead.

════════════════════════════════════════════

Frustration overcoming her, Hermione groans as she flips the pages of her book harshly. After going through it thoroughly dozens of times, she basically knows every word on every page by heart.

Dumbledore must’ve left this with her for a reason.

There has to be a reason.

Carefully scanning the pages once more something catches her eye, a triangle shaped symbol near the top of the page.

Flipping through the book again she realises the symbol is only drawn on a single page, clearly not meant to be apart of book.

It could mean nothing of course but there is no way for her to know for sure.

This is something but not nearly enough to go on. It still isn’t the clue she was hoping for.

Hermione’s mind starts to wander and like so many times today she's once again plagued by thoughts of you.

She wonders if you might know what the symbol represented, being more naturally versed in the wizarding world than she is.

The nauseating feeling in the pit of her stomach returns and she has to fight the urge to cry, again.

She had no way of knowing when you’ll return but the ring on her finger provides her with a much needed reassurance.

Hermione glances at it, examining the strand of light that’s emerging from the ring.

Something she’s done many times before for comfort.

She knows where you are, she knows you’re safe.

“Hermione!” Harry’s voice in the distance snaps her out of her thoughts.

“You were right.” Her best friend says, taking a seat in front of her.

“Snitches do have flesh memories, but I didn’t catch the first snitch with my hands. I almost swallowed it.” Harry says, handing her the golden ball.

Hermione carefully reads the words etched into the metal.

I open at the close.

“What do you think that means?” Harry asks.

“I don’t know.” Hermione says.

Still not enough to go on.

“I found something as well.” Hermione holds up the book and Harry takes a look at the symbol.

“At first I thought it was an eye but now I don’t think it is.”

“This isn’t apart of the book, somebody drew it.”

“I think Luna’s father was wearing that at Bill and Fluer’s wedding.”

Harry says and it only worked to leave Hermione more perplexed.

“Why would someone draw it in a children’s book?”

A beat before Harry speaks again.

“Hermione I’ve been thinking, I want to go to Godric’s Hollow.”

“It’s where I was born, its where my parents died.”

Hermione stands up before shaking her head in disagreement.

“That’s exactly where he’d expect you to go because it means something to you.” She says.

Harry scrambles to his feet, walking after her.

“Yes but it means something to him too Hermione.”

“You know who almost died there. Isn’t that exactly the type of place he’d be likely to hide a horcrux?”

Harry’s practically pleading.

“But its dangerous Harry–”

Hermione stills for a moment, as much as she hates to admit it this is the only lead they have.

“But even I have to admit recently I’ve been thinking we have to go there.”

“I think it’s possible something else is hidden there.”

Hermione says, walking ahead of Harry.

“What?”

He asks and she turns to look at him.

“The sword.”

════════════════════════════════════════════

A week since you’ve seen Hermione and you were getting nowhere.

No solid leads on where the Hocruxes might be hidden and you had no idea where the sword is.

The death eaters planning their next attack on Harry only exacerbated your anxiety.

“Nagini tells me the boy was at Godric’s Hollow.”

“He wasn’t alone.”

The Dark Lord says and you begin to feel a pounding in your ears.

He stands up walking around the table.

The room is silent as he eventually stops, settling behind your chair.

“A girl was with him, a mudblood.”

“Hermione Granger as I understand it.”

The pounding in your head was now intolerable, you shut your eyes bracing yourself for the inevitable.

You were foolish to think you could maintain a relationship with Hermione and get away with it.

To your surprise, Voldermort fails to acknowledge you entirely.

Instead, he addresses the man sitting next to you.

This provides you no relief, you would still prefer torture over what came out of the Dark Lord’s mouth next.

“Scabior, when you find this girl, make sure you bring her straight to me. It seems wherever the boy goes, she follows.”

You recognised the man he was ordering to be the leader of a gang of snatchers.

“Yes, my Lord.”

He says, getting up from his seat and quickly apparating out of the room.

Voldermort does the same shortly after and soon the other death eaters follow.

Leaving you alone in the dining area with your parents and the Malfoys.

The Dark Lord may be gone but you are still struggling to catch your breath.

Getting up off your chair you begin making your way to the bathroom.

Your parents do nothing to stop you but your best friend notices your distressed state.

“Y/n, you alright?” Draco stops you, placing a hand on your arm.

“Yes, I’m fine Draco.” You say without looking at him.

Finally reaching the bathroom you quickly closed the door.

When you got to the sink you turned on the faucet, splashing some water on your face.

It did nothing to help, the room was still spinning.

You shut your eyes tightly as you tried to control your breathing.

At the forefront of your mind all you could see was Hermione.

Your stomach turned at the notion of her getting hurt but the idea of finding your way back to her worked to calm you.

You had to get back to her.

You will get into Bellatrix’s vault tonight.

Once the ringing in your ears dissipated you stepped out of the bathroom.

Making your way to the living area of the home, you were abruptly stopped in your tracks.

Snape was stood before you. As expected, his expression remained unreadable.

“Professor.” You greeted him and he wordlessly steps closer to you.

Holding up a key, one you didn’t recognise but if you had to guess it would be a key to somebody’s vault.

It’s as if the professor read your mind with what he says next.

“The key to a vault in Gringotts.”

Snape says and you eyebrows knitted together.

Despite your obvious confusion he does not elaborate.

“Sir?”

He moves forward slipping the key into the pocket of your blazer.

“Use the key and you will find the thing you require.” He says rather ominously and in any other circumstance you’d find humor in his dramatics.

Could a horcrux be hidden in this vault?

Even if that was true why would he want you to retrieve it?

Hundreds of questions and the Professor doesn’t allow you an opportunity to ask any of them.

He dissaparates without another word.

You were left dumbfounded.

Who’s side is he on?

════════════════════════════════════════════

You wasted no time in making your way over to Gringotts.

Your parents barely batting an eye when you lied about where you were headed. Pansy had clearly done a good job at covering for you which also meant you owed her a ton of favours.

A small price to pay.

“He sent me to retrieve something from his vault.” You responded to the goblin.

“Do you have his key?”

“Yes I do.” You say, holding it up.

“Very well. Come with me.”

The goblin barely gives you a reaction before guiding you past the barrier.

Upon reaching the vault you prepared yourself to look in every corner for the hidden items. Having no idea what they might even look like, you were prepared to spend hours searching if need be.

You were certain of one thing, you were not leaving the vault empty handed.

“Vault 713.” The goblin says as he opens the door to the vault. Passing the key back to you he swiftly takes his leave.

Your shoulders slumped once you took notice of the contents of the vault.

Or rather the lack thereof.

The vault was virtually empty.

Stepping further inside you noticed something propped up against the wall, covered in cloth.

Rapidly making your way over to it you unveiled the item and your mouth fell agape once you realised exactly what it was you were holding.

It was the sword of Gryffindor, sitting in this vault of all places, when it had been presumed to be missing.

Most baffling of all, Snape had been the person to lead you to it.

════════════════════════════════════════════

You found yourself in a hillside after apparating.

You don’t recognise the area at all, making your way down you silently hoped for Hermione to show herself.

“Lumos maxima.” A bright light emerges from your wand, igniting the area.

Soon you spot a figure in the distance.

You let out a sigh of relief once you realised who it was.

“Potter!” You called out.

Harry runs up to you, his eyes were quick to settle on the sword in your hand.

“How?” He asks, pointing at it utterly perplexed.

“Long story.”

“You have the Horcrux with you?”

Harry nods, taking the necklace off.

He sets in on the ground.

You held out the sword, waiting for him grab it.

Harry merely looks at it.

“I think you should do it.” He says.

You are taken aback for a moment but Harry’s expectant expression was quick to convince you.

“Okay.”

You prepared yourself, holding the hilt of the sword with both hands.

“Now I’ll have to speak to it in order for it to open. I don’t know what’s in there but the bit of Riddle in the diary tried to kill me.”

“Whatever it is, don’t hesitate.”

“Alright, I hear you.” You gripped the sword tighter.

Harry begins speaking in parseltongue and before you know it, a large black mass bursts out of the locket, throwing you back onto the ground.

The dark lord’s voice can be heard echoing around you and it makes your blood run cold.

“I’ve seen your dreams y/n and I’ve seen your fears.”

“A disappointment to your parents.”

“Because of you, the only one you love is in constant danger.”

The voice says.

“Y/n don’t listen to it, it’s lying!” Harry exclaims.

Images of Hermione appear in front of you. Innocent at first but develops into more violent visions the longer you stared at it.

It was as if you had stepped right into one of your nightmares.

A vision of you throwing the killing curse at Hermione causes you to flinch, a dread suddenly overwhelming you.

It was so vivid you could feel the pain in your chest.

“Y/n kill it!”

Harry’s voice snaps you out of it.

The locket using your fears against you was the worst kind of torture.

Your hatred for the Dark Lord only grew, he truly was evil in its purest form.

Your anger worked as the courage you needed to grab the sword off the ground.

With one large swing you cut the locket in half, finally killing the part of Voldemort inside it.

════════════════════════════════════════════

“Is everything alright?” Your girlfriend asks Harry, as she emerged from the tent.

“It’s fine.”

“Actually it’s more than fine.” Harry says, pointing at you.

You smiled as Hermione’s eyes finally settled on you.

You hold out your arms as she walked up to you, expecting to pull her into a hug.

She catches a glimpse of the sword in your hand and the look on her face causes your smile to falter.

Hermione is angry with you.

She turns to look at Harry and he only holds up the broken Horcrux.

“You destroyed it?”

“How is it that you just happened to have the sword of Gryffindor?” Hermione asks, crossing her arms.

“I got it from a vault at Gringotts.”

Before you could register what was happening Hermione was hitting you repeatedly.

“I told you not to go into her vault! If you had gotten caught you could’ve died!”

In a fit of anger she grabs a handful of leaves from the ground and chucks it at you.

Placing both hands on your chest she attempts to shove you.

Quickly dropping the sword you held her arms in place before speaking.

“Hermione wait, will you please calm down and hear me out?”

Hermione fights to get out of your grip but fails as you are considerably stronger than her she is.

“Hermione, please just listen.”

“I didn’t get it from her vault.” You explained.

“What?” She asks.

Before you could elaborate, Ron emerges from the tent.

“How come you’ve got the sword?”

Ron repeats the question and you glower at him.

You assumed he was finally done throwing his tantrum now that he’s back.

“As I was saying, I got it from a vault. Snape gave me the key to it.”

“What?” All Harry, Ron and Hermione say in unison.

“Snape led you to the only thing that could kill hocruxes?” Harry asks but it sounded more like a statement.

“That doesn’t sound right.” Ron adds.

“Well it’s the truth.” You state.

“I know it sounds insane but I don’t think this was an accident. I think Snape wants us to win.”

════════════════════════════════════════════

You sighed happily as you watched Hermione grab your pullover from the edge of your bed, putting it on.

She lifts the sheet to cover the both of you before leaning back, resting her head against your chest.

“You know we have two pillows for a reason. You can lay your head against yours once in awhile.” You joked.

Hermione hums, snuggling into you.

“Why would I do that when you’re so comfortable.”

You chuckle, your arm instinctively wrapping around her.

The both of you laid silently for a few minutes, basking in the afterglow before Hermione breaks the silence.

“How’d you manage to get the sword without your parents knowing?” Your girlfriend asks.

“I just made up a lie about Pansy needing me for something urgent and when my parents asked she covered for me.”

You say, not putting much thought into your answer.

“Pansy Parkinson?” Hermione asks, an edge to her voice.

“Yes.” You mimicked her tone.

Your girlfriend moves out of your hold, resting her head against her own pillow.

“Oh.”

“I didn’t know you two were friends.”

Hermione says and you can’t help the smirk forming on your face.

“Since first year. Surely I told you that?”

You decided to keep taunting her a little longer.

“No, you didn’t.”

Hermione remains quiet for a few seconds and you accepted it to be the end of the conversation but she speaks again.

“How many girls have to been with? Before me?” Hermione blurts out and your smile returns.

You shrug.

“A few.”

“A few?” Hermione repeats, sitting up.

Her eyebrows furrow and you don’t think you’ve ever seen anyone behave so adorably.

“It’s just meaningless sex Hermione.” You reassure, sitting up with her.

Hermione’s pout doesn’t leave her lips and you’re tempted to kiss it off.

“It’s different with you.” Your voice low as you planted a kiss against her shoulder.

Your hand finding her bare thigh, stroking it dangerously close to her center.

“It’s so much better with you.” You say into her ear and you feel her shiver under your touch.

“Really?” Hermione asks, turning to face you.

“You are the best sex I’ve ever had.” You plant a kiss against the corner of her mouth.

You watched as Hermione bites her lip, an obvious glimmer in her eye and you anticipate her next move.

Your girlfriend straddles you again, this time pinning you down against the mattress.

She kisses you with little restraint, she sucks on your bottom lip before her tongue entered your mouth.

Hermione’s lips are moving against yours shamelessly, her hands roaming your body as if claiming you her own.

If this is what it took to get this side of Hermione then you ought to make her jealous more often.

Your hands manage to rest on her ass for a moment before she grabs them to pin over your head.

Hermione runs her tongue along your jaw, eventually settling at the base of your ear.

She moves downwards, biting down playfully and you feel her grin forming against your neck.

Running her tongue along that same patch of skin before sucking on it.

You didn’t have to look at your neck to know she had left a bruise.

Evidently proud of herself, Hermione flashes you an innocent smile before climbing off you to get back under the covers.

She resumes her earlier position with her head on your chest.

“If you’re marking your territory next time it’d be easier to just pee on me.” You quip.

Hermione lets out a laugh before scrunching up her face in disgust.

“You’re nauseating.”

[maxverstappensflatbrim]

Show Me Yours | Matty Healy [42]

chapter forty-two, act five: the ballad of me and my brain

masterlist

November 3rd 2017

Tommie had woken up alone in Phoebe’s apartment, with many missed calls and texts of people asking if she was okay.

Her brows had furrowed and she’d hesitated to call Adam back first. He’d called her eleven times, and although they haven’t spoken since that day he came to the apartment she still worries something is wrong.

Her mind goes to her grandparents, but she spoke to her nan yesterday. They were on their way to a trip to Tenby in the caravan with the dog, they’re fine. Unless something happened on the trip. 

Nan can’t swim. Granch got sick. Or a heart attack, or an accident-

“Tom? Tom, thank god, are you still in LA-?”

It’s then she realises how late into the LA afternoon it is, her clock reads one o’clock and she realises she’d probably been up way longer than she should’ve been writing away until her heart's content (until she passed out from exhaustion).

“What’s going on?”

“Matty’s missing.”

This is the first time she’s heard his name in months, and her heart stops.

She sits up straighter, both Button and Max looking up at her in question. “What?”

“We tried to stage an intervention, shit-” She hears him sigh, can hear Ross and George arguing in the background with another voice that sounds a lot like Jamie, “He took off, a few days ago, he’s been doing it alot lately, he’s never been gone this long.”

“Where are you?”

“San Jose.”

She sighs and climbs out of bed, putting her phone on speaker and setting it on the bedside table. She grabs a pair of jeans from the chair she’d thrown them onto last night, getting a random t-shirt and throwing it on quickly, not even bothering with the effort of finding a bra. She does however, go to the effort of saying goodbye to the two dogs before shoving on her shoes, grabbing her bag that holds her essentials (keys, wallet, journal, lip balm, cigs, lighter and some other unnecessary shit.).

“I’ll come meet you, you in the place we stayed in last time?”

“No, we’re in the fancy one across the road you liked the look of.” She hears more arguing, and then a door slams, “It’s seven hours, Tommie, you- stay in LA, I just- has he tried calling you?”

“No, no he hasn’t. I haven’t talked to him since TRNSMT.”

Adam sighs, “He’s not himself, Tommie, I don’t know what’s going on with him. He’s in his own head, doing so many fucking drugs, Tom, I-” He sighs, she hears a sob-like sound get stuck in his throat, “We’re trying but he’s not listening, saying he needs to clear his head-”

Suddenly it dawns on Tommie and she pauses halfway down the steps outside of her building, “What has he said?” She asks quickly, fumbling to get the Uber app up as she walks down the street, “Tell me exactly what he said before he left, Ads.”

Adam sighs, stutters a few times as he tries to remember the conversation he had with Matty five days prior, “Um, something about the drugs helping him sleep, clearing his mind, helping him write and create, said that the drugs are his muse or some philosophical shit. I-I don’t know, Tommie.”

She watches her Uber pull up and puts the phone to ear, “Ads, I’ll call you back, don’t worry alright.”

“Tom, please don’t-”

“Don’t worry.”

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ

The studio is a mess, clothes thrown over floors, crumpled up pieces of paper, cans of beer, coke and all different kinds of things ruin her path to the booth.

There’s a drum beat on loop, it's so loud she can hear it through the headphones and it almost drowns sounds of snoring from the curly haired musician.

He’s half on the settee half off, wearing only a pair of boxers and a large hoodie of their own band.

Tommie pushes her way through the mess on the floor that her hands shake to clean, she satisfies the urge for her hands to move by moving her foot to kick at Matty's side.

When he doesn’t wake she hits him harder and he gasps, curling over on himself, “Ow.”

“Get up.”

His eyes snap open at the voice and he sits up, fumbling to pull the hoodie down to cover himself and she rolls her eyes, “What are you doing?”

“Making music.”

She looks around, “Looks like it.”

She walks over to the mixing board and pauses the drum beat playing then looks back at him, “What are you doing, Matty?”

“Why don’t you call me Roddy anymore?”

She sighs and clenches her jaw, “You’re not my Roddy,” She tells him quietly, “I don’t know where he went, but… he’s been gone a while. I miss him, If you see him- if you see him, will you let him know?”

Matty rolls his eyes and runs a hand through his hair, “What are you doing here?”

“The guys are worried, so worried that they actually mentioned your name to me, which, I’m gonna be honest, I haven't heard since Scotland.”

“Bet you loved that.”

“I did, actually.”

He scoffs, eyeing her up and down, she crosses her arms and leans back against the desk behind her.

“What are you doing here, Tommie?”

“I care about you, Ma-”

He scoffs again harsher this time and stands up, “Don’t make me laugh, you’re the one who walked out on us all, remember? Back in July, picked up your guitar and ran off to LA like it meant nothing.”

“I- what did you expect me to do, Matty?” She asks, keeping her voice on a lower level despite his shouting a few minutes prior. “Did you expect me to sit beside you and hold your hand as you killed yourself I-”

She shakes her head and looks away, “You left us. Not just me, you left-”

“Just because I left doesn’t mean I don’t still love you.”

He pauses, mouth open as he was preparing to shout something else. Tommie sighs, hands coming up to cover her face for a few seconds. Too many seconds, although he counts his head, he reaches twelve, he still thinks it's too long for her to hide away from him.

“I’ll always love you, Matt.” She promises, she avoids looking at him and he takes a few more steps forward to get closer to her, “I love you too much to sit by and watch you do this to yourself-”

“So you left me? Made it worse-”

“You won’t listen!” She moves her hands away from her face to shove his chest. He moves back to arms length then. Just watching her.

She shakes her head, finally raising her voice, “You won’t listen to any of us, to me, G, Ads, Ross, your own mother who’s gone through the same thing, we’re all worried about you.”

“I’m fine-”

“No you’re not.” She tells him, “Look at yourself,” Despite his better judgement he lets his eyes glace to his reflection in the dark tinted window behind her, “You’re a fucking mess, Matty, and quite frankly it’s fucking pathetic.”

He lifts his head, looking at her down his nose, “Half the time you can’t string a sentence together, you’re passing out on stage, lashing out at everyone, you’re a mess, Matthew.”

His jaw quivers as he tries to keep his composure, “You’re so- so god damn stubborn, and blind. Look around, Matt, you have so many people here trying to help you, trying to love you and you just won’t let them. Why, because you’re scared?”

“You don’t know anything about-”

“Quite the opposite, “She bites back, “I know you, Matty, I know everything about you. I know everything about my Matty.”

She steps to him this time, lifting one hand ready to hold him, “Are you scared, Matty?”

He looks to the small coffee table in the studio, one they'd spent many nights gathered around with pizza boxes listening to music and telling jokes. On the table sits a joint, beside it empty packets that she doesn’t even want to know are inside of it.

“I’m not-”

“Matt.”

‘You’re in love with her but you’re afraid a guy like you will ruin her. And you will.’

He nods quickly, letting the tears welling in his eyes linger a little longer, “I’m afraid, Tom.”

“Of what?”

He shakes his head, mumbling something under his breath; neither of them can understand, “Of what?”

She shakes her head and walks closer to him but he fights her off, not letting her touch him, “I-”

“Matt-”

She watches his eyes dart to the door as he licks his lips, “I’ve got a flight.”

“Matt-”

“Tomorrow, I need to pack all my stuff.”

“Matty, please, just slow-”

He nods to himself as he gathers the only thing he brought with him, a little tote bag, her little tote bag. One from the record shop she likes in London. He shoves inside his wallet, phone, charger and notebook then starts stumbling around until he finds his jeans and shoes.

“Matty, would you please-”

“I’ve got to go-”

“Matty,” She huffs, trying to follow him around but his longer legs are moving too fast, closing up his laptop, stopping the demo, throwing the stupid memory stick with the song he was working on into the mess around them, “Matt, please, just stop for a couple seconds- Let’s talk-”

“Nothing to talk about, I have to go, seven hours to San Jose-”

“Matt!”

He still doesn't listen so she pauses as he opens up the door, “I broke up with Caleb.”

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ

“Why’d you break up?”

Tommie watches him dip his fries into the red sauce and then shove them into his mouth as if he hasn't eaten for years.

She sighs and looks down at the table in the little diner they’re sitting at, she picks at the table cloth beneath them and leans back.

“Creative differences.”

He snorts and she finds her lips curling a little bit into a smile.

“Seriously?”

He shakes his head a little, “I always hated him, I mean, not just because of the whole you thing, but because he was a raging arsehole-twat-prick dude.”

She nods her head in thought, “I mean, he hated Deftones, you love Deftones, if I hated them- hell, if I uttered a single bad word about them you'd break my neck- literally! I can’t believe you didn’t break up with him over that. And one major thing you should’ve ran from was his love of country music, I mean, If I heard Jesus take the whe-”

“He got me pregnant.”

Matty pauses, fry mid air, mouth open ready to bite down on it, instead his gaze is settled right on her, missing the ketchup dripping down to stain the white table cloth on the table.

“What?” He looks down towards her stomach slowly and she shifts uncomfortably covering herself with her arms, “You’re pregnant?”

“I had an abortion, few weeks ago, that’s why I’m out here, Matt.”

“What did he-”

“He told me I had no right because it was his baby too, and threatened to tell the press.”

“Did he? I mean, I haven’t seen anything but-”

She shakes her head “I told him if he did that then I’d make sure his band never made it. Then I kicked him out of the apartment, cut my lease short and moved in with Phoebe.”

He hums in thought, picking at the table cloth.  

“I was so scared, Matt. I’m terrified of the thought of having children, of ruining my career, my life, not because I’m not as strong as other women or anything like that, or I won’t be able to do that. Because I just don’t want that-”

She breaths in slowly and tilts her head at him, “I wanted my Matty. Phoebe told me I asked for you, when I was out of it. Said I asked her to go get you for me.”

He looks down, staring at the heart shaped hole he’s ripped into the dining table cloth. “I was terrified of doing it without you. What were you scared of?”

He scoffs and shakes his head, “Matty, please-”

“Did you tell me that just to try and get me to open up?”

“Trade you.” She shrugs and leans over to steal a chip.

He sighs, “When Gemma broke up with me she told me some harsh truths, one’s that I needed to hear and I don’t know. I guess I just know deep down that she’s right. I don’t want to ruin you.”

She tilts her head, reaching across the table to set her hand on his, “You won’t ruin me, Matty.”

“I will. Cause you’re you, you’re a good person, Tommie. I don’t want to ruin you.’

“Matt-“

He shakes his head and stands, “I have to go. I’ll see you around, yeah?”

“Matt-“

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ

She looks around the mess in the studio. Now that he’s gone, that he’s back on his way to the rest of the band she can let herself go nuts and clean it.

She starts by cleaning up the takeaway boxes from the floor, then she folds the blankets and cleans the messy table.

Half way through cleaning up she finds the discarded memory stick he’d tossed aside. There’s a post it note wrapped around being held there with cellotape.

‘Baby, two.’

She lifts up the memory stick and then slowly puts it into the computer. 

There's a small sniffle and then a sighs as he strums a few chords. "Baby, two. Um..." He sighs again and shifts around, the leather chair creaks but is cut off as he clears his throat, "This is my deepest confession, I guess. This is for Tommie, I'm sorry. I'm sorry about a lot, that it took me so long to realise and that when I finally did I'd already pushed her out. But, I don't want to hurt her, I don't want to let her back in-" He sighs again, "Anyway, this is take one. Baby, I don't have a title yet."

I've been watching you walk I've been learning the way that you talk The back of your head is at the front of my mind Soon I'll crack it open just to see what's inside your mind … Inside your mind

Marry me, I will wait until you're fast asleep Dreaming things I have the right to see Lately you are dreaming you're in love with me The only option left, is look and see inside your mind

… Inside your mind I can show you the photographs Of you getting on with life I've had dreams where there's blood on you All of those dreams where you're my wife

Inside your mind Inside your mind Inside your mind Inside your mind

She raises her brow at the deep voice but sits there to take it for a few moments taking it in.

Every moment between her and Matty has ever shared floats through her head. From meeting to starting the band, to being on tour, to living together, to that night in LA, to watching him leave yesterday.

She thinks over every decision she’s ever made.

Being with Caleb, never telling Matty.

Maybe if she just told him, if she’d let him know how she really felt none of this would have happened. He wouldn’t have turned to drugs, he’d be safe.

Or maybe he still would have. And they’d be unhappy. Together but unhappy. And they’d hate each other.

They must be good. She wonders. The drugs, there must be something about them. Why else would he love them so much? More than her, more than the band.

Before she can stop herself she’s sitting on the floor, eyes not moving from the baggie on the table as her fingers drum right beside it.

She just wants one look. One look inside Matty Healy’s mind.

taglist

@thereisaplaceintheheart, @indierockgirrl, @sofaritsalrightt, @julezs-bl0g, @eaglestar31, @sophinthealpss, @noacfemcel, @if-my-heart-bleeds, @befrwime, @fallingforel, @sexorchocolateorpillowsorclouds, @3terna15unshin3, @1975sophie1975, @thesocraticjunkiewannabe, @littlesoldierelleora, @procrastinatinglikeapro, @beatr2x, @byyourside28

-let me know if you want to be added :)

[choicesmc]

CEDAR STATION - MEET THE MCs - DROP ONE

What’s this, you ask? Well, @aria-ashryver is doing this wonderful little series called Welcome to the Jungle! [here’s the latest episode], I thought it’d be a cool idea to make moodboards of all the MCs featured in the series. I also made this decision after episode two when there was only six MCs. Episode 3 added a couple more MCs whose moodboards regrettably will not be on this post. …Instead, they’ll be in the next post [DROP TWO] (<- I’ll link it here when it goes up.) 

You cannot imagine the amount of fun I’ve had learning about all of y’all’s MCs and trying to create moodboards that are 1) cool and 2) reflect them and your vision of them. I hope I’ve done all these wonderful MCs literally any justice so without further ado onto the moodboards! 

(It's under the read more)

ANITHA

tagging: @lover-also-fighter-also Can I just say? More Anitha content? Please? Especially about her childhood? Absolutely fell in love with the fact that she sings and plays soccer and used to ride motorcycles with her dad.

DORIAN

tagging: @/aria-ashryver (<- i wasn't sure whether or not tagging the same person multiple times in a post would show up multiple times in your notifs and didn't want to risk it)

Dorian is lovely. It's kind of embarrassing how many times I've poured over literally any mention of Dorian on your blog. I took the wants to be a hero and fucking ran with it. anyway please enjoy the fruit of my obsession.

EVIE

tagging: @cadybear420 Admittedly, you were expecting this. I wanted everything to be a surprise but I also wanted to make sure I especially got Evie right. I hope this one is miles better than the prototype I sent you like forever and more ago! (Can you tell l adore Evie's style? Can you?)

LUCA

tagging: @/aria-ashryver + @lilyoffandoms (that's their amazing work smack dab in the middle of the board!!)

Love Luca, don't think I can say much more than that about it 😭 (Wanna know the inspiration for the main background? -> Luca always having a cracked screen. the minute I saw that the rest of the board fell into place xD)

MARIANNA

tagging: @rosesnink

My stars. Prior to this project, I'd briefly come across Marianna in tidbits and snippets. I regret not knowing this brilliant woman sooner. I fell in love with her and your writing! It reminds me of soft kisses and secret trysts. Thank you so much!!

RIN

tagging: me + myself + i

look. I couldn't not include Rin??? I'd be a monster to do that!

So, really hope y'all like your moodboards! Like I said, I have another big post planned (though it'll take a hot minute before it drops xD) It was so so hard keeping myself quiet. You do not want to know how many times I almost leaked this 😭 or the urge to post each on individually!! But I am so glad I resisted! It's so much more fun in a big post like this :D

[inconspicuousmaker]

Worm: A Parahuman Musical

Nobodies gonna see this but I don’t fuckin care I want to write about a Worm musical and so I am.

I have done 20 minutes of research (I typed in worm parahuman musical Reddit) and while people have already done amazing work, because duh, none of it quite fulfills what I want.

Specifically an actual makeable concept.

So no end of the world

No slaughterhouse 9

Heck probability not even leviathan.

2 and a half hours to fit the themes, plot beats, and messages of over 1 million wordsinto. So we gotta cut stuff.

Warning this is just me rambling and I didn’t even grammar check it.

My proposal is thus, and I’ll probably come up with more over the next few days, though I’d need to reread the first few arcs to truly do this justice.

The plot beats I would use (and I’m sure I’m missing good ones)

Open to Taylor in school per canon singing a solo called something like “I’m gonna be a hero tonight”. Have some cut ins with the trio, and have it fuel Taylor’s rage that she redirects into song furthering that she not gonna stoop to there level and go Carrie. She’s gonna do good.

Slowly transition to her walking around town in costume looking for a fight and have song end with Lung speaking.

Fight happens and we get to see her powers (light, sound, and good physical acting) and defeat lung

That’s all I have right now (because that’s all of canon I can keep straight without research) but I do then have some song ideas and endings

Originally I suggested using the bank as the finale or the end of first act with Leviathan finale. But as I got halfway through writing that I remembered Bakuda and had a better idea.

Bank is halfway.

Before that we get songs about the undersiders and Taylor’s growing friendship.

Her and Armsmaster at odds (exactly like the Wormilton one in placement)

One with her and Danny

Aswell as coil meet

I think cutting the trio is the time efficient move aswell as any Locker references.

Alternatively cut coil and add the trio but that then leaves other problems.

Maybe I’m overestimating time though and Trio could fit (I don’t think shadow stalker though)

Then bank heist which is a large ensemble peice (maybe cut Vicky and amy? Depends on time) and finish with undersiders escaping and making a name for herself.

Second act start in after action report at procterate interlude style. All the wards retelling (clock blocker bemoaning bugs is a must) and cut ins form armsmaster and Piggot. (A song from piggot something like “I hate this city” or “capes are crazy” would work well but alas, time is a harsh Mxstress)

We then get undersiders loft charcters bulding 

Bitch goes for a walk and Lisa pulls Taylor aside to tell about Dinah. 

They decide Coil needs to go down (song “spider and the fox”?) and then go look for Rachel.

Bakuda introduction and short fight (they lose badly but get away)

My ideas get a bit fuzzy here

But somehow Bakuda breaks lung out

And Taylor hatches a on the spot plan on the chaos that lures coil out and simultaneously defeats Bakuda and Lung. 

Include her having to blackmail Colin to help her as a nod to her having to force the “heroes” to do the right thing and have her rematch lung

Finally have her hand over all the villains she captured to the heroes at which point they offer her a chance to join them as a probationary ward.

She gets stressed her secrets revealed but Lisa double reveals that they knew all along and that they trust her.

She of course says fuck the heroes and the show ends with a song about how she’s gonna be a hero semi reprising the first with the added addition that she’s gonna be a hero as a villain (maybe “it takes a villain to be a hero”?

And of course that she has freinds now.

That’s all I got

Okay I lied

Here are some miscellaneous ideas that wouldn’t work in this version

Leviathan finnaly ibvoiuslt could be super fun

Have first act end in undersiders lair planning bank robbery and second start from wards perspective as they try to stop it

Rewriting the whole thing about Amy

leviathan puppet

any E88 stuff (which like. Does make stuff a bit iffy without them balancing out ABB)

Okay that’s actually it

Enjoy my incoherent ramblings empty void of the internet

[bookshelf-dust]

🖋️ want another blanket?— you know Im picking Billy and fluff of course! 😊

slumber party shenanigans

billy hargrove x gn!reader

a/n: hi!!! i thought of this pretty quickly and figured it could be sweet. i hope you like it!! thanks for sending one in <333

————

🖋️ want another blanket?—i will write you a little ficlet (under 1000 words) for the character of your choice. i would appreciate if you’d specify whether you want comfort/fluff/angst/whatever and i will try and come up with something for you!

“I don’t understand why we can’t go buy ice cream at the store and eat it here. Shit, baby, I’ll take you to that place in town if you want it that bad.”

“Because, Billy. They’re my friends! I’m being supportive of their endeavors.” Billy rolls his eyes at you. “How many times have I come to the pool while you’re working? Or how often do you come to the store and pretend like you’re in dire need of a book?”

“That’s different,” he says.

“No it’s not,” you argue, and then pause, thinking.

“They have strawberry cheesecake,” you add.

Billy stares at you, trying his best not to show any emotion. He disappears for a moment and comes back with shoes on and his keys.

“Let’s go then.”

You knew that would work.

When you get to Starcourt, Billy holds onto your hand for dear life. Not only has he avoided the mall as often as possible, but there are way too many shithead kids running around in here.

You turn a corner, and the crowd thins out, less children and more young adults meandering through the record store or walking towards the Gap. Billy spots the boat booth sticking out of Scoops Ahoy! and sighs.

There’s a long line, and it’s no wonder, because it’s fucking scorching out today. Robin looks up from where she’s been scooping ice cream into a cup and hands it to a sticky-fingered child. She catches your eye and perks up, her bored look turning into a much more pleased one.

Steve is at the register, poorly flirting with some girl you’re pretty sure you went to high school with. She awkwardly takes her change and walks away.

Robin slides over when you and Billy are at the counter. Steve’s rubbing his forehead, ashamed at himself. He’s really losing his charm. She elbows him.

“Ow, Robin! What the hell?”

“We have special guests!” She proclaims, smiling at you and Billy.

Steve finally looks up, focusing on the both of you. “Oh. Hi.”

Billy’s practically hiding behind you, his fingers tucked into the belt loops of your shorts. He really doesn’t like this.

“Hi, Robin. Steven,” you say. You’re the only one he’d let get away with that. Perks of spending time in the Upside Down one might say.

“What can I get the both of you on this fine Tuesday—it is Tuesday isn’t it?”

“Yes, Rob,” Steve reassures her.

“This fine Tuesday afternoon?” She finishes. You order for yourself and Billy does the same. You pretend not to see the glimmer in his eye at the prospect of his favorite ice cream. It’s hard to find these days.

You stand there while Robin takes her sweet time, possibly adding a little more than you asked for, just because she can.

Billy opens his wallet, handing Steve cash. “Harrington,” he says in greeting.

Steve nods, smiling as politely as he can. “Hargrove.” He takes the cash and counts out the change. “Everything going swell?”

Billy chuckles. “Yeah, I guess you could say that.”

Robin hands you both cones, and you give Billy his.

The four of you stand there for a moment. “Well,” you finally say, “I hope work goes okay today. You guys wanna see a movie for something this weekend?”

“Sure!” Robin says. She’d decidedly in charge of her and Steve’s outings.

“I’ll call you,” you tell her. She shoots you a wink and a thumbs up.

You walk away from the counter and turn to Billy. “I assume you don’t want to sit here and eat?”

He kisses your forehead in gratitude. “Please don’t do this to me. I’ll sit anywhere else.”

You laugh, watching him lick the ice cream that’s already begun to drip from the cone and then from his hand.

He raises his eyebrows. “See something you like?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know.” You pat him gently on the ass and move away from Scoops, off to find somewhere else to sit. You hope to revel in the air conditioning for a bit longer.

[daydreamgoddess14]

Landslide pt. 1

MASTERLIST here

Summary: Jason approaches a singer/songwriter about a request for Ted Lasso Season 3.

Jason Sudeikis/Reader Insert (OFC, no use of y,n/l,n)

Rating: General for now... we'll see how it goes 🤭

Disclaimer: I absolutely own none of these songs, I also don’t want to diminish Sam Ryder’s contribution in creating Fought and Lost. This is all completely fictional. I also know nothing about the music industry so this is drowning in artistic license! 

Playlist Link: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1crFZfdqL1fspNXb80u5sK?si=e90f5f8f357b4647

It leans very Swift heavy but also has songs that I feel fit the main character and her style. I've never created a playlist for a fic before but it seemed appropriate given the main character's profession.

Songs used in Chapter 1: 

If I had a gun - Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds (piano cover version): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xvoxDXxdok)

Landslide - Fleetwood Mac (piano cover version): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5JP43fk_SM)

Chapter 1

“Have you checked your emails yet?” A voice sounded through your apartment.

“Not yet, why - anything good in there?” You ask, your head deep in the fridge searching for eggs.

“Marcus wants to talk to you, he said he’s text you?”

“Yeah, he wanted me to show up at a couple of his Canadian dates but I’ll be in Spain. Or France... Europe, I’ll be somewhere in Europe.” You emerge somewhat triumphant, a two egg omlette will have to surfice.

“You’ll be in South America actually.” Your assistant Lily takes a seat at the counter and slides a coffee over to you.

“Oh. Well, I won’t be in Canada that’s for sure. I already told him I couldn’t do it, I wonder why he’s still asking.” Lily passes your phone over and goes back to attempting to tackle your inbox while you drop a message to Marcus.

Hey, sorry I missed you. Can’t do Canada - I’m in South America that week. Thought we’d talked about it already? Would love to catch up with you & Carey when you’re back in L.A though. Let me know xx

You’d actually met Carey long before Marcus. The same age, you’d crossed paths a lot in your early and mid twenties when she’d been an up-coming actress and you’d been a struggling musician. You’d drowned many, many sorrows together in dingy South London pubs, you’d been in the audience at her first performance of The Seagull in London and you’d followed her to New York to watch her Broadway debut. In contrast, she’d cheered you on in dark clubs and pubs for endless weeks and months. When she’d reconnected with Marcus, he’d tagged along to a couple of gigs and asked you to join the band for a number of their shows. Eventually you were added to the billing on your own, and supported them on a range of tour dates. From there, your career had really taken off. Now, you were regularly selling out arenas and festivals. Next on the masterplan was a worldwide stadium tour, but that was some way off. First you had music to write for a new album and a summer of festival appearances planned.   

“Aha! Figured it out!”

“Did we miss an email?”

“Not entirely, it went to junk so it’s not really your fault. Or mine.”

“What is it?” You ask, pushing the eggs around the pan.

“Hang on, just reading now… It’s from a Tom Howe?” You look blankly in reply, the name sounds vaguely familiar but you’ve no idea where from. “Hi, I’m trying to get in contact with you regarding Ted Lasso season 3. Jason came across some of your older work and the sound is a great fit for the show. He asked if I could reach out to you to discuss further. You also come highly recommended by Marcus Mumford who I believe is a friend we all have in common. Don’t hesitate to give me a call on the number below or reach out via email. We don’t have too long on this so would appreciate speaking with you. Best, Tom” Lily finishes reading the email on her device just as your phone rings.

“Do you just not read your emails, or?”

“I’m a bit behind! It’s been a busy few weeks.” You dump the eggs onto a plate and team them with a toasted muffin.

“Ah yeah, the life of a superstar.”

“You should know, you’ve sold out more gigs than me.”

“Not true… maybe still true but not for much longer.”

“If you say so. How are you? How’s Carey and the kids?”

“All good here, they’re missing you though.”

“I’m back in a few weeks, we’ll have a day out. Lily just read me the email from Tom.” “What do you think?” “I’ve no idea, I need to hear it again. How on earth did you think of me?”

“I didn’t. Well, I did. I play your stuff all the time. We were working on Season 3 and it just so happened that Jason heard some of your really early stuff and liked it. He asked if I thought you’d work with us so I said I’d ask - or rather Tom would.”

“That makes sense. He said something about a tight timescale?”

“Kind of, the show premieres next month but we’re thinking of you for the back half of the season so wouldn’t need anything from you till early May.”

“Do I get an idea of what you need?” “That’s where you’re better off talking to Tom and Jason. I daren’t spill any secrets, I’m not getting in trouble.”

“Ok, I’ll get in touch with Tom and set something up. Is he based in L.A?”

“He’s there at the moment, yeah. Why, are you still in New York?” 

“Yeah, I’m here til the 13th I think? But I might be able to get there early.” You reply, looking to Lily for confirmation who nodded, stealing the last bit of your muffin.

“Ok, definitely call Tom, cos if the timing won’t work then he’ll need to think of something else. Let me know. I’m in L.A at the same time as you so we’ll catch up.”

“Love to Carey and the babes.”

“See ya darlin’.”

“Right, I’d better read that email again properly before I call anyone else.” You sit next to Lily who opens the email back up for you. You can see that Marcus and what appears to be Jason have both been copied in. It had been sent earlier the following week so had been stagnating in your junk folder for about 6 days. “Shit.” You mumble, realising. “What’s the time in L.A?” 

“Umm 8.30am.” Lily checks. “Acceptable enough for a work related call?”

“Fuck it, I’ll leave a message if it’s not.” You read the number from the email and dial it from your phone, taking a deep breath. “Hi, can I speak to Tom please?” Tom was, it turned out, really lovely. You’d grown up not a million miles away from each other in various parts of London and he was a similar age to your older brothers. You instantly felt at ease with his good humour and musical knowledge. He’d explained that they were looking for a specific song to be used towards the very end of the season in a highly emotional moment. Though he and Jason had heard your recent music, it wasn’t until they’d been with Marcus who was listening to your much older back catalogue that the penny had dropped for all of them. In the days that had followed, Marcus had given them a masterclass of sorts, sending them copies of your early work and showing them how it had grown as you had and how your new music still has similar themes and styles. You’d blushed furiously while pacing in your apartment. Marcus hadn’t exactly been telling the truth about just how in depth your music had been discussed in recent days. You admitted that you wouldn’t be in L.A for another two weeks and questioned whether it would be a problem, he thought not and you’d promised to respond to his email. You hung up feeling elated at the prospect of a new project to get stuck into.

From: vialilyevans@gmail.com

To: thowe@gmail.com

CC: mmumford@gmail.com, djs@gmail.com

Subject: New Project

Date: 27th February 2023

Hi Tom, 

It was great to finally speak to you earlier, I apologise for missing your email - thankfully Marcus set me straight. From what you’ve said this project sounds really interesting, I’d love to hear more about it. As discussed, I’ll be in L.A from 13th March but can be there earlier if you have time? I know that’s pretty close to the premiere so I understand if you think we can’t fit this in - there’ll always be something else! On the off chance I am still in luck, I’m going to spend a couple of days binge watching 🙂

To: vialilyevans@gmail.com

From: djs@gmail.com

CC: mmumford@gmail.com, thowe@gmail.com 

Subject: RE: New Project

Date: 27th February 2023

Hey,

Thanks for reaching out, I won’t speak for Tom on how much time we have, but I really want to make this work so happy to hang on for as long as possible. Here’s hoping you can turn a track around in 24hrs, I guess?! It would be great to meet with you as soon as you can make it to L.A, then you could also attend the premiere if that sounds OK? I'll get the details sent over to you. We can meet first and then figure out next steps. Don’t worry about timing, that's on me.

JS

You’d received a reply within minutes. Literally minutes, and you were buzzing. It was from Jason himself. You’d only been half joking about binge watching, you’d done that already with Season 1 but had run out of time recently for Season 2. Now you were even more itching to watch it. Though you had no idea of storyline or what kind of song they were looking for, you could tinker with melodies and riffs. Tom had talked specifically about family, love and fighting for what you believe in so you could use those basic prompts to get you started. Over the following week, you'd worked on some new music and planned to bring your trip to L.A forward by a week. You were going to be there for up to 4 weeks. The information had come through inviting you to the season 3 premiere of Ted Lasso, so you'd made sure to catch up on season 2 just in time. But first came the initial meeting with Jason and Tom. You almost wished you could get away with waiting till the premiere but knew that wasn't realistic and you could totally understand why they'd want to get to know you sooner. L.A afforded you a little more anonymity than New York and with Tom's studio as the meeting place, you had a reasonable cover for being there if you were to get noticed by anyone. You slipped out of your Uber and followed a path through a pretty little courtyard. You'd gone for a denim skirt and Bon Jovi t-shirt, it felt miles warmer in L.A and you'd tricked your body into believing that Spring had fully arrived. You pressed the door buzzer and waited patiently. Lily had offered to go with you but you were still very much unused to having a real life assistant and still attended most meetings, interviews and events alone. 

"Hey, you made it! Come in, I'm Tom. You're alone?"

"Yeah, it's easier to go unnoticed." You smiled stepping into the entryway. 

"I wouldn't know, thankfully no one knows who I am."

"After the few months I've had, I'd wish the same thing." You follow Tom through the building, a handful of offices, a small kitchen and then into a corridor with a recording studio on either side.

"I don't pretend to keep up with gossip so I'll just have to take your word for it." He admits, you're grateful for that. It had been a rough 6 months or so. Your last relationship with a well known actor had ended abruptly - in that you'd escaped. He'd then leaked all over social media and outlets such as Deux Moi that you were 'emotionally unavailable', 'manipulative' and 'high maintenance'. He'd placed horrible, false comments that you'd supposedly made about your fans and friends, and he'd tried to alienate everyone against you. There had been a pile-on of negative press about you. Say nothing the management team had said, do nothing, stay calm and quiet they'd insisted it'll blow over. Bullshit. You'd gotten a little drunk and joined a friend in playing a dumb Tik Tok game where she'd asked what your 'Ick' was… you'd replied "Boyfriends who gaslight you and are emotionally and mentally abusive and then try to blame you in the media to make everyone hate you'' with an arched eyebrow and a knowing look. She'd posted it to Tik Tok and within minutes Twitter was ablaze with your retort. It had completely taken over the press tour for his new movie and overshon his interviews. Other exes of his had posted similar confirmations and praise of you on their socials. You’d then gone totally dark on the subject and not commented any further. Your team were still picking up the pieces from the escapade but you had so far been hailed a bit of a hero and it appeared that people were leaning more on your side now than they had been. It was only a matter of time before he’d produce some other lies though, at which point you fully expected that you’d have to go public and go all in on substantiating your initial comments. The how and the when preyed on your mind heavily. Tom led you into the studio on the right, a huge mixing desk took up much of the space but there were a couple of desks and sofas, space for downtime and collaboration. Beyond the mixing desk you could see into the studio itself with its acoustic panels and sound deadening equipment. Jason sat at the mixing desk, elbows up on the table typing on his phone. He turned and smiled at the sound of the door opening.

"Hey, glad you could make it. I'm Jason." You hold out your hand to shake his, his large hand engulfing yours. Your skin instantly felt like it had been set alight. He was tall, broad and ridiculously handsome. Binge watching the show had given you an almighty crush, so you'd sought out his other work too. Once you'd found out how funny he was, you were done for. Get a fucking hold of yourself you thought. It had not been so long since a man had touched you that you should be this affected by him. But, oh those eyes. And that smile is really something. He takes off his baseball cap and drags his fingers through his dark hair, greying at the temples and if you’d focused for any longer than half a second on that alone you couldn’t be held responsible for your actions. He greets you like he's known you for years and as Tom gets the meeting going, he's charming, attentive and so quick witted it makes your head spin a little. "I'm looking for a song specifically about the relationship between hope and failure and perseverance. That's the basic outline at least - I can't tell you much more than that." He apologises. You whip out your phone, 

"Just taking some notes, that OK? I get it, you don't want some rando knowing the ending." He motions for you to go ahead, smiling as your fingers frantically move across the screen on your notes app. 

"Yeah you might spill the beans on Twitter."

"It was Tik Tok actually."

"Ah how's it go? 'Tik Tok made me do it'?"

"And a lot of wine." You smirk, "Can I ask, how you feel about season 3 generally? For the song, I promise I'm not fawning over you to get information."

"I don't know if it's the end of the end, if that makes sense. It could carry on in different ways." 

"I'm just trying to figure out if it’s a goodbye to the characters, or to this chapter of their lives… from what you've said the song needs to be really personal. I want to make sure the emotion is there. Are you really sure I'm the right person for this?"

"I'm sure. I've heard enough of your music to know that this is what we need, I know you're more than capable. Between what you can do and what Tom already knows I need, I'm completely confident." Tom nods in agreement having stayed silent for much of your conversation. 

"So is this like The Voice? Do you guys have a list of people to see?" Tom laughed, 

"Not at all, we're hoping you're it to be honest. Though since you're here it would be great to hear you sing if you're happy with that?" 

"I didn't bring anything with me, so as long as you don't mind sharing your piano or a guitar?"

"It's all yours." He gestures into the other room and you head through nervously. They both join you, not wanting to listen via speakers. You stop for water first, and then flip through your notebook to find a suitable song, settling on something reasonably new but not so well known. You'd been performing for the best part of 20 years, you knew every note, every line, but performing in front of two people was about a million times more nerve wracking than two hundred people, or even two hundred thousand people which was exactly what you had lined up in the summer at Glastonbury. You closed your eyes, honed in on the piano at first, allowing yourself an extended intro to give you time to compose yourself. 

If I had a gun,

I'd shoot a hole into the sun,

and love would burn this city down for you.

If I had the time,

I'd stop the world and make you mine,

and everyday would stay the same with you

Hope I didn't speak too soon,

my eyes have always followed you around the room.

'Cus you're the only God that I will ever need,

I'm holding on and waiting for the moment

for my heart to be unbroken by the sea

You didn't play the full song but it was one you were extremely proud of. You let the piano trail off and risked a glance at Jason and Tom who were grinning at each other. Jason let out a whistle, 

"Y'know how you always wonder how people are gonna sound when they sing live and it sometimes doesn't live up to expectations?" He said mostly to Tom. You’re stomach dropped, oh god, were you about to fall into that camp?

"Yeah. Yeah that was pretty special." Tom agreed, vocalising Jason's thoughts. You breathed a huge sigh of relief. 

"Thank fuck for that. I haven't done that one for ages. You scared me then!” You said more to Jason.

"It's a beautiful song. I could just use that for the show to be honest, but I'd regret not working with you on something original." Tom said, as he did so, his phone rang so he left to take the call, “Sorry, be right back.”

“Any chance of another song?”

“I don’t see why not, while we’re waiting for Tom.” You flipped back through the notebook again, this time choosing a classic cover you’d done for years and years. It had been one of the first songs you’d learned and the lyrics seemed to change meaning for you in different chapters of your life so that it always fit you.

I took my love, I took it down

I climbed a mountain and I turned around

And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills

'Til the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky

What is love?

Can the child within my heart rise above?

Can I sail through the changin' ocean tides?

Can I handle the seasons of my life?

“Holy shit.” He mumbled, sitting on the piano bench next to you. You could see through the glass that Tom was still on the phone. You run your hands over the keys playing mindless notes and melodies, no real intention behind, just filling the comfortable silence. You feel him leaning against you a little as he watches you play, the narrow bench not quite big enough for two.

“I played it with Stevie Nicks once.” You say quietly. “I actually thought I was going to die. It’s like I have this black hole in my memory, where I remember meeting her and then I remember coming off stage and we had a couple of drinks together, but I can’t for the life of me remember actually singing it with her.”

“I think that’s probably to be expected. Our brains do weird shit and make us feel like idiots.”

“That is definitely the truth.”

"I would really like to get to know you a little better while you work on this," Jason admitted almost hesitantly, "if that's OK with you?"

"I'd like that a lot." You smile, he returns it, relieved. 

“So how did it go?” Lily asks when you call her from the Uber ride home. You’d stayed far longer than any of you had probably anticipated, throwing ideas around and experimenting with melodies. You can’t help but gush over just how much fun you’ve had - probably for the first time in weeks. 

“I can’t wait to get started, they were both so welcoming.”

“And Jason?” Lily asked, knowing about your crush. You pause slightly, it’s been hard to know who you can actually talk to recently. With your ex on a campaign to smear your reputation, it’s hard to know who is really on your side. You know that the comments he’s made are all false but it still worries you that some people will believe him over you. 

“He’s just… lovely. And my god he’s gorgeous, like up close in person? He’s insanely handsome. I felt like a creep staring at him!” Lily giggled along with you,

“Oh my god, I didn’t realise this crush was like a full on crush?!”

“Neither did I!” You admit. “Tom had to take a call so we were just mucking around at the piano for ages.”

“You had to sing?”

“Of course I did! They want to know that I’ll be the right fit for what they need.”

“What did you sing? How was it?” Lily knew you hadn’t sung properly for weeks, you were rusty and unprepared and it made you anxious just thinking about it.

“I did ‘If I had a gun’ and ‘Landslide’. It went ok, my voice is a bit rough, but nothing some decent exercises won’t help.”

“Classics! I’m so happy for you.”

“Thank you. I wasn’t expecting this… connection. It’s weird, like he saw me immediately, like he’d known me forever. I feel like someone’s just plugged me back into real life.”

“You should write a song about that.” She teased.

“Well, I need to. They want to move forward with me so I need to bring my A game.” You reply, anticipation fizzing in your belly.

~~~~~~~~

Let me know what you think! I'm excited to get started on this 😊 As usual, my inbox is open!

[shrinkthisviolet]

do you have any headcanons, old or new, for the kf!Barry possibility? i am so intrigued by it, fascinated even and i'm curious about your own takes, or what's the most interesting thing about it to you?

Ahh I love this question! It’s an idea I periodically get obsessed with from time to time, and I’ve talked a bit here about how I’d write it. And to expand:

I’ve never been a fan of Killer Frost’s split personality thing in the show, and it’s not comics accurate, so I’d probably do away with it. It’s just the general colder body temperature affecting his mind (chronic cold effects are terrifying, and that wouldn’t even be as bad as this, because this is inside him), not to mention his constant hunger for body heat to try to reach homeostasis (comics-based and…also, given biology, makes sense)

There’s a few different times I could give Barry powers, though I love the idea of them manifesting during s2 and him using them to defeat Zoom, freezing and shattering him to pieces

On the other hand, I also love the idea of them manifesting during s3, the way KF’s do in canon, maybe after he’s already met his frosty E2 doppelgänger. I doubt he’d team up with Savitar…unless Savitar was Iris and they became a genuine evil duo (not the leader-subordinate dynamic that Savitar and KF had in canon, but a true equal partnership)

He could also get powers in s1, and they start to affect his mind. He’s snappish, more irritable…and most of all, he doesn’t trust Eowells (especially if Iris is the Flash, and CSI Barry’s hero worship for Eowells is overridden by suspicion and worry…especially as he starts noticing more things off about Eowells)

And, to slip in a little Barrisco, I think KF!Barry and Reverb might’ve been the dynamic duo on E2. So KF!Barry on E1 might be very keen to recruit Cisco and replicate that…👀

Maybe he becomes an anti-hero like KF does in canon—still with villainous tendencies, but using them in service of the heroes (I do usually love that trope 💞)

I also have quite a few thoughts about “what if I wrote him in the Morgan AU as a spinoff AU” (4 additional headcanons for anyone interested in that):

He gets powers from the accelerator in s1, and they affect him as per the first headcanon outlined above. And, ofc, no split personality

He doesn’t fall into a coma, and instead, decides to use his powers to protect Central City. He doesn’t tell anyone—and if Iris is the Flash here, he ofc can’t tell her. While out on patrol one night, he meets a young hero who calls themself “Sentry”—definitely a kid or young adult, and definitely in need of guidance. Barry might not know how to be a hero, but he knows how to guide people. Probably (and their powers certainly make them useful…even if he’s horrified at that fleeting thought)

Barry and Morgan’s dynamic is thus pretty different. It’s less equal from the start, and it never really approaches that. Morgan looks up to him, and Barry…doesn’t quite look down on her, but as time passes, it gets close. Even as they become friends outside of their superhero identities, she’s still very much someone he needs to protect, not so much someone he can count on to protect him

He also notices some things are up with Eowells and Morgan. Some…not so great things. As time goes on, a picture starts to form in his head—abuse? Neglect specifically? Something. He’s only a CSI, he can’t investigate that…so he drops anonymous tips to CPS. Eowells gets out of all of them, and Morgan is visibly much more anxious after that, so Barry takes the hint and stops, but he’s still pissed that his effort was futile. But also…maybe it’s for the best. Where would Morgan go? Tina raised her for a little while but gave her back to Eowells, she can’t be trusted. (Maybe the only person he can trust for such a job is himself—and he should be horrified by the thought, but…he’s not)

send me an au and i’ll share 5+ headcanons about it!

Taglist (send an ask or DM to be added or removed):

@arrthurpendragon @ocappreciationtag @raith-way @vexic929 @ironverseocs @thechaoticfanartist @goldheartedchaoticdisaster @negative-speedforce @starstruckpurpledragon @angst-is-love-angst-is-life

[ntaras]

Would you be willing to speak of this OC you added to the Lin Kuei brothers' dynamic? (Just kidding, you have no choice. 🫴)

HI i’d love to talk about her!!! i’ve been purposefully quiet about her because i’ve been making some changes to her + waiting to finish writing a fic about her 

but because you give me no choice i’ll talk about her

i’ll talk about her in context of her role in the new era because that’s what i’m really currently focused on in regards to her. that and her role in the previous timeline(s) are currently to much of a mess to coherently write about because i’m reworking her previous roles 

ANYWAYS. her name is luna which i did take from the “look to la luna” easter egg because 11 year old me wanted her name to somehow directly reference something in mortal kombat. she is kuai liang’s daughter even though i do view/headcanon kuai liang as someone who would not have kids, but i think it’s fun to bring that element into their relationship. 

the usual backstory for her goes that when kuai liang was a teenager he met a girl named nariyaana (whom i mostly refer to as yaana) and their relationship can honestly be described as a very quick-paced love because they were both so young when pursuing each other. like had they not met when younger, they would never be together because their relationship is solely based on them being young. so far in every timeline yaana has died during childbirth, resulting in kuai liang being a single dad and that moment marking the change from his youthful naivety and growing into the mature man we usually see him as. 

in mk12 before he became the god of fire and was still making his own timeline, liu kang made sure kuai liang and yaana would meet so luna could be born, but what he didn’t decide was when luna would be born. one of the things that frustrated me about kuai liang in mk12 was how he was already treated as a character dealing with so many inner demons and very quickly became this wise and flawless leader, so luna’s inclusion allows me to dump a whole bunch of hardships onto him that make him more tolerable for me. and one of those hardships is the quick and rushed love he had with yaana, resulting in her pregnant and unfortunately dying in childirth at 16 and him bieng a father at 16 (i also decided on doing that because ik the characters are meant to be on the younger side, so making him a teen dad was the route i went with trying to make him as young as i could when the actual story would happen). 

ik cryomancer used to be established as something that was able to be harnessed at an older age (with the exception of the ice brothers and frost), but for mk12 i’m establishing that it’s something that begins to develop at a younger age. i’m still unsure what to do with pyromancy but the idea i’m going with is that it’s something that can very rarely develop in cryomancers instead of cryomancy. 

what happened with luna is that her powers were not showing at all and as she grew older and past the age cryomancy develops (and she showed no signs of pyromancy) it was assumed that she didn’t get her father’s genes of either cryomancy or pyromancy. but eventually at around 10 years old she reveals to bi-han that she does have cryomancy (albeit developed very late and a weaker form of cryomancy), and at that moment bi-han saw potential in her and became her mentor and eventually choose her to be his heir to the lin kuei. 

before i get into the dynamic she has with the brothers (her father and uncles) i need to establish the most important thing about her is her inner powers and her physical body. the reason why her cryomancy developed so late and is weak is because her body is meant for someone who has pyromancy, but she was born with cryomancy. her body is constantly struggling to keep up with itself, but i’ll get more into that in a bit because that’s like one of the most important factors to her relationship with her family. 

bi-han is luna’s mentor, and he chose that role himself after she revealed her cryomancy to him. and the reason he chose to be her mentor is because he 1. Saw potential in her and 2. wanted to build her up to become something greater than the current lin kuei. her issues with her cryomancy and her body already pose a tough a life for her but bi-han’s insertion into her life as her mentor makes things worse for her, as he’s really tough on her. 

bi-han himself was mostly trained by his dad, so a lot of methods bi-han uses are from his dad. BUT the thing with bi-han is that he is also trying to further himself from his father and teach luna differently, but luna still experiences the same harshness bi-han experienced through his own training with his father. it plays with the idea that cryomancy just inherently causes not just physical pain, but a specific isolation that no one else can understand. because of this (and for other reasons) luna struggles making connections with other people and forms a unique connection with bi-han that she cannot form with her own father.

it’s eventually why she chose to stay with bi-han rather than flee with kuai liang and tomas during the story. her inherit cryomancy bound her to bi-han while also she felt like she lost a sense of who she was and felt guilt for having something that sevrerd her relationship with her dad, so it was easier to let him go rather than go with him. 

her physicality (which is constantly causing her pain) is her father’s, while her inner self (which is also constantly causing her pain) is bi-han’s. she’s kind of like the physical representation of the dispute between the two brothers. just like her body cannot naturally keep up with herself, she cannot handle being stuck between her family’s war without it causing immense confusion with herself.  

that’s the most condensed summary i can offer because other wise you would be getting a 100k word response from me lmao. but thank you for asking!!!!!!!!! i adore luna and i can only appreciate mk12 because of her

[campbyler]

ok. a genuine question. how do u guys write 20-30k *chapters* bc i will outline fics minutely or i will just let myself start writing based off a vibe & either way i will get 600 words out of maybe. two hours of work. on a good day with no distractions/interruptions, & i very much do not have an uninterrupted two hours to write very often, so you can imagine how slowly things get written T_T so i’m interested if there’s any aspect of any of your writing processes that really enables u guys to write so much or if it’s not really something you think about? anyways i really like ur guys’s work, & thank you for deciding to write for byler bc i know me and a lot of people enjoy it a lot. thanks!!

hello !! this is a super valid question and i’ll try my best to answer it for you 😗✌️

andi infamously writes a lot faster than thea and i do (she finished draft 1 of chapter 3 in like. two days. which was so scary. i’m in awe of her fr) but she has also spent a lot of time editing ch3 so it’s definitely not like these chapters are publish-ready in a short amount of time by any means! it took thea a couple of months total to fully write + edit ch1 and it took me about 3.5 weeks to write ch2 and another two weeks to edit it which is part of the reason we’ve spaced out our posting schedule like we have — we put a lot of effort and care into these updates and we want to give ourselves as much time as possible to get ahead before all 3 of us inevitably get so super busy with work and/or school in the fall!! so while we do write a lot, please don’t think we are so insanely speedy about it because unless we are having Really Good Writing Days, that’s definitely not the case. sometimes we do have days where we are really in the zone and write more than usual, but at least for me, this is so so so rare. whatever i write in this time gets heavily edited because so much of it was nonsensical brain vomit LOL

as far as writing process goes, i think one of the things that motivates us a lot is that we genuinely do just talk about this au constantlyyyyy like we’re always coming up with silly little hcs or drawing for it or adding to the Lore ™️so we’re always getting inspired to write! all three of us are definitely people who use writing as a way to relax or even reward ourselves after a long day; we would probably die if we had to go too long unable to :/ messages like “i can’t wait to get home and write after work today” or “i’m going to write a little bit of ___ before bed because i deserve it” are very commonly found in our gc because we really just look forward to it so much! as for our scary word counts, i feel like there is a lot of worldbuilding in this universe specifically, and pacing is really important to us — we want to make sure introductions and set-up to a scene and character interactions are meaningful and flow naturally, and building tension (which is a hallmark of this fic hehe) does take some time, which can definitely add up word count-wise.

for the most part, none of us usually have a solid few hours to sit and write either (unless it’s on our days off or after work if we’re not too tired) and we get a lot of writing done in chunks! we hold each other accountable for short check-ins (“ask me for a snip in 30 minutes”) which is super helpful when you’re stuck, because it kind of forces you to get Something down without worrying if it’s super polished and edited and perfect. if you’re writing on your own, something i’ve started doing lately is setting a 15 minute timer and just seeing how much i can get done in that time, and then setting another and doing it again (up until however much time you have to write that day). i’ve found that the artificial deadline helps break the monotony of sitting in front of your computer for Hours on end with nothing to show for it bc TRUST we’ve all been there and it sucks so bad 😔✊

this got super long so i apologize but i hope at least a little bit of it was helpful! it definitely helps that we are constantly feeding into each other (i.e: having brainrot) and offering inspiration and advice, which does wonders for creative flow tbh. we’re definitely not cranking these chapters out as quickly as people might seem to think — thea started chapter four, which won’t be posted for about a month, maybe a week or two ago. i just started chapter 5 — about 6 weeks away — yesterday lol so we do take our time! don’t be scared by the giant chapters, we just had a lot of content we wanted to include in each one and are in too deep to take anything out 🥳🥳 thank you for the question! good luck with your writing we believe in you 🫡

[rabbittwinrithings]

I’m finally making it, My Beyond Reach Review

Disclaimer: While I didn’t have the best time with this mod, that doesn’t mean you may not. I never want my opinion to sour someone else’s, and have the risk of them not playing the mod. So I highly recommend you check it out. 

I’m putting this disclaimer as well since my playthrough of the mod is a bit unfair. I played it with godmode (since I suck at game combat,) and after a while started to clip through dungeons to get them over with. This started to happen around halfway through as I found myself more frustrated with the mod and kinda wanted it done. I also played through only mostly the main quest. However, a friend of mine did tell me about one sidequest I do have a problem with. So keep this in mind with my review that I may be treating it a little unfairly. 

There’s also the point that mods are hard to make, let alone one of this scale. The mod author did an amazing job at creating this mod and I never want to invalidate that. With all that said, let’s get going. 

CW: Sexual Assault, Child Abuse, Ped*****, Cannibalism, and Harm Towards Women.

And Obviously Spoilers!

First off, I’m not the best at writing reviews. It won’t be wonderfully crafted or anything, just mostly detailed bullet notes of what I liked and disliked. While there is more I disliked, I did find some positives and will be layouting things in a sandwich review (that’s the right word?) going from positive to negative. Here we go!

This is a review for the mod, Beyond Reach by razorkid. 

Good: Grimdark. I will always love me some Grimdark. Hell, my current playthrough of Skyrim is currently a grimdark playthrough all with dead trees, gallows, horror monsters, ect. And while I think some parts of Beyond Reach’s grimdark-ness falls flat, most of it holds up and creates an eerie atmosphere. There were bodies hanging, creepy monsters, creepy dungeons, and a lot of stuff that fit the tone of the mod. However... some of it did not... 

Bad: A lot felt like shock value. In grimdark there’s always a tendency to add a lot of stuff for shock value, and sadly, BR had an abundance of it. I knew the mod got dark, but still I decided to play the uncensored version as I did want to get all the content. However, some it felt just... unneeded. At one point the player is tasked to go raid an Orc stronghold where there are legionnaire prisoners. However, you end up finding two of them, both women, one alive, one dead. The player can piece together what happened from that alone, and yet the mod goes as far as to have the alive prisoner wail at one of the soilders about how she was raped and would have an Orc child. The only purpose of this scene felt like to show how horrible these Orcs were. But why not just do that with dead prisoners (doesn’t need to be SA,) or why have her go on a whole speech about it.     After playing through this part I really was trying to rack my head around how it could have been done better. And honestly, after a day, I was reminded of Red Dead Redemption 2, and the scene were Arthur finds a woman who was also SAed. The only difference is that the scene added more than just “wow, those guys we killed were pretty bad,” instead, it added to Arthur's character. He helps the woman home. When she’s about to explain what they did he simply said “I know.” Subtly in situations like this tend to be the most powerful. As people our brains peice together what we want to see and having the woman simply say “They...” and the solider reply with “I know,” would have made the scene much more powerful. (She’s also naked during the whole ordeal, let me give the woman a blanket, something!)    There’s other darker themes that I felt like were shock value (mainly the ending place with some children, however, talking about will just make me sick. So I think I’ll just move on. Basically, some stuff happens to kids and again I feel like it’s only there to prove how bad someone is and doesn’t give much of anything else. I feel like something horrible and big like that need to have numerous reasons to be there than a singular “look how terrible this dude is!”)

Good: Cool enemies. I don’t really feel like there’s much to say on this part. I just thought some enemies were really cool. I think the ones that stuck out to me are part of Vicn’s Creature Pack, but could be wrong. Mostly it was the bloody skeleton monsters. Very cool to see. 

Bad: Not much role playing. Honestly, this part kinda made me the saddest as after one sidequest (which may have been my favorite part of the mod,) I had become an enemy of the state. It felt super in character as I was playing Alllin and despite being a serious guy, is also a little chaos gremlin who will flip off authority. But despite all that, I still ended up becoming a knight of the very state I was an enemy of and was forced to pick dialogue options that bended my knee to the king and was very formal. I’m not saying multiple path options in the way of a knight or criminal are needed, I just wish there were more dialogue options. 

Good: Neat dungeon horror design. So this one is a bit here and there as the dungeons I went through had super neat astrosphere that did have the grimdark feel to them. One was an asylum dungeon which I found pretty neat. However, there was also a problem with length... 

Bad: Long Dungeons. While this whole review is subjective, this part may be the most as I hate dungeons. If they’re neat looking I don’t mind. But when they take around thirty minutes to complete and little progress has been made I get real tired of them. This is why I started clipping through dungeons to just get the thing I needed and get out. 

Good: Music is nice. (But as I type this I went to go find the composer. But I don’t see any credits to music, so a slight bummer. If you know who did the music, please let me know and I’ll edit this part with credits.)

Bad: A lot of dead women. And I get it, a lot of people in general die in this mod. And maybe I’m misremembering stuff, or looking to deep, but in the main questline there was one main female character. And she is killed. And then there are several spots that are just about women in harm. (Like the SA I mentioned before, a part where a little girl is killed by a griffin, an Orc woman being tortured, a brothel getting massacred.) And I just didn’t see so much focus on men. And that sounds weird. But when it leans to one side so much, it is just super noticeable. 

Good: Voice Acting is nice. I know there isn’t too much to say there. I just really liked it. There were some unvoiced lines, but I don’t have too much of a problem with that since they are still looking for voice actors for various roles. I think the only problem I have with the unvoiced lines is that there’s no white noise for the line so the dialogue would just blink in and out and I couldn’t read what was said. 

Bad: Very railroad path. You are forced to be a knight, and see red flags of the nobility and yet you can’t do anything. Most of the time when you question a noble why you should do something it’s “well I’ll just have you killed,” and sure, not dying is great, but then the next line I’ll talk as if my life wasn’t just threatened.     A friend of mine who tried to be a bit more through in the mod took a sidequest where it told you a noble (who turns out to be evil later on in the main quest,) is a cannibal. Can we confront the noble about it? No. Can we warn those who may be hurt by him in the future? No. Do we talk to him as if we don’t know that he eats people? Yep! It’s all just odd and I think again it just falls back to the lack of player choice. 

Good: So on my list I wrote “Liked sick town,” which makes no sense to those who haven’t played it. So to explain it better there was a Side quest I really liked. Not only did it give a ton of player choice, but it actually made me feel like a good person, and the people were nice to me!    During my playthrough I made a rule that if someone was mean to me, I wouldn’t help them outside of the main questline. Cause why would I help someone who is rude to me? (There’s also an issue that most of the place is filled with mean people, so it creates little to no agency to help High Rock.) But one event was with some guards at a city I had to get into. I had to help them with an issue of some sick people and one of their guards who went missing. Come to find out the guard got sick and was trying to find medicine for the town so that they could live about three more years in peace. And in the end I was given a choice to kill the town, or help it. Obviously I helped it and became an enemy of the state. But I loved it! While the sick people would threaten you if you got to close to them, the guard with them was understanding. And his compassion for these people really stood out to me. It’s a shame I later had to bend my knee to the very people that wanted to kill them... 

Bad: Lore Friendliness. This one is very short as I see lore in ES as free real estate. I don’t care what you add in your mod. That what makes it fun. However, I know this will be a turn off for some so I thought I would say it. I think the main factor is you talk to Mara on various occasions and I’ve been told that isn’t possible. 

Good: City Design. I just like the layouts and looks of the city. What else can I say? Districts were interesting. (I think I'm running out of typing juices...)

Bad: Too much going on at one. There’s an Orc extremist group, there’s reach men attacking, there’s Namira shit, there’s a plague, and there’s a civil war starting. That is a lot, and it’s just the main quest. I realize it’s good to have a lot going on in a location, but not all of it needs to be in the main quest. All this stuff makes it super confusing and hard to keep track of what is really going on. 

Bad: Buggy. I’m doing two bads in a row as I do want to leave the review off on a good note. There were quite a few buggy stuff. However, considering how I played through it I wouldn’t doubt if a lot was my fault. That being said, I know some who did play through it correctly did also suffer from bugs. That being said, I know the mod author is still working on the mod so bugs will most likely get fixed.

Good: Dialogue explanation. One thing I really found helpful was that in front of dialogue options were [lore], [quest]. These little tidbits made it super easy to tell what dialogue I was picking or which one I needed to pick. Very small detail, but works wonders. 

Oh me, oh my, that is long... Sorry about that. 

TLDR: The mod is successful in it’s eerie astrosphere, but is dragged down by heavy writing. lack of player choice, and shock value issues. 

Thanks for reading all this and want to say again I don’t want to sway anyone away from this mod. I think it’s always important to try out something for yourself. Though, if the Content Warnings from above upset you, I recommend playing through the censored version (it will ask you in the game.) I haven’t played through the censored version, but it says it get’s rid of those events. 

I may try and do more reviews in the future, but understand these reviews are never an attack on the modder as I get modding is extermley difficult. My reviews are here to be optional constructive critism, and if I’ve said anything wrong or you disagree with I’m more than happy to have a conversation in the comments.  (I also say optional as sometimes modders aren’t looking for critism and just want to mod/create and that is 100% valid.) 

Thanks for reading again, and hope y’all enjoyed! 

[corruptedplaylist]

act iii: final notes

edit: 4/9/2024: added some more stuff!!! i'll put this emoji 🫧 next to the new things so u know where to scroll.

AHHHHHHHHHHHH I FINISHED MY FIRST FULL LENGTH FIC HOLD ON LEMME JUST THROW UP IN THE CORNER REAL QUICK

i am sooooooo normal rn anyways let's get into it thank u for having me on the show, mr. kimmel. i've had a raging headache all day so the content underneath each sections will be kinda short. i'll go through and add more to it once i recover but i wanted to get this up before the week got too busy!

krolia

guys…. im so sorry for the angst….. it was necessary for the plot…….

maybe it’s just me projecting but in the actual show, i kind of wish we had seen more of the emotional fallout that occurred after krolia revealed that she was keith’s mom. because let’s be real here, there’s no way that keith’s traumatized ass would just willingly accept her back into his life. he’d have questions. he’d be in disbelief. it’s hard for him to open up to others and he carries a lot of hurt from being abandoned.

it was crucial in the course of this fic to have that confrontation between krolia and keith. it's not always going to be rainbows and sunshine, and even though they both missed each other deeply, you don't just automatically connect and forget everything that's happened. even if keith hadn't gone into the foster system, he definitely would have carried a lot of anger and hurt towards krolia when she shows back up. i'm sure that things won't just be smooth sailing and they'll need to hash things out multiple times as they rebuild their relationship but that first fight was a big hurdle to get over.

if you’re curious, i have a whooollleeee backstory for what happened with krolia and why she couldn’t get back to her kid. i couldn’t really fit it into the fic but i’ll put it right here for those who are interested:

2000: krolia in the US on student visa, first year of of PhD program

krolia meets heath and they fall in love

2003: krolia gives birth to keith

2008: krolia finishes grad school/PhD program/doctoral degree and applies for a work visa 

2009: she and heath and baby keith are living their life but krolia’s parents find out and are like girl you need to come home NOW or we will disown you 

krolia’s family are really wealthy and powerful 

krolia: i’ll come back for you guys idk how but i will 

krolia goes back to the states

2009-2011: she and heath write letters but then the letters start getting intercepted by the family and eventually peters out

krolia in arranged marriage and thinks her partner forgot about her or didn’t care

meanwhile heath doesn’t know what happened to krolia but can’t do anything about it bc she’s in a diff country and he doesn’t speak korean

2011: heath and keith move to texas for job or whatever

heath tells keith all about krolia and how she loves him but can’t be there and obvi that fucks keith up bc he misses his mom but where tf is she? how does he know she loves him if she’s not even there? he's a little kid

2013: heath dies and keith is put into the system

heath has no other family members

krolia put her english name on the birth certificate and so ofc she doesn’t exist in the US

texas social services try to reach out to krolia along with some friends but letters are intercepted

2016: someone reaches out to krolia after she finally gets facebook 

friend: thinking of you. miss you. so sorry about heath

krolia: …. what the fuck about heath?

friend: uhhhhhhhh

krolia goes on rampage to her family like wtf u mean u didn’t tell me that the father of my child is dead

cousin shows up with the intercepted letters (official notice from social services, heath’s letters and pictures, keith’s little notes and drawings)

krolia starts the process of legally and financially emancipating herself from her family (she basically was Britney’d)

2017/2018: finally is free and able to get a job in the states

starts tracking down heath (they only had a forwarding address for krolia so they’re like wtf who is this bih)

at this point, keith has already met the shiroganes and changed his name

krolia is in a different state and can only do so much 

spends the next few years trying to find him, hires P.I., again keep running into blocks bc social workers and case managers are NOT going to budge on giving up keith's personal information

2023, winter break: krolia reaches out to keith through facebook but it goes into his spam since they’re not facebook friends

allura

what better allegory for sacrificing yourself to save the universe is there than graduating college? in all fairness, i felt like sticking to the notion of allura saying goodbye and leaving the group had its merit, just y’know, i wanted to take a step down from the whole dying thing. i tried to pay homage to the canon material as much as possible while also providing my own spin on things.

one thing that’s been important to me is depicting allura as a college student. sure, while i think most iterations of allura as a kind and a great leader and intelligent are great, even in modern au fics, i just wish there had been a bit more... silliness? outside of her being like the girlboss, the hell yeah supporting character or love interest or bone-tired leader, i always wonder what she would have been like if she hadn't had to save the universe and was just trying to heal on her own terms. yeah, i nerfed her parents in this universe but i tried to showcase her doing normal college things as well, like presenting at research conferences, getting a bit messy drunk, having pizza nights and group hang outs. the funny thing about grief is that life does not stop for it, so you have to just figure things out along the way.

i also didn't want to elaborate too much on her relationship with lotor. she didn't magically heal from that one conversation with lance in chapter 8 but i wanted the readers to get a taste of what was going on in her head through their dialogue. plus, it was a little moment to show how she was allowing herself to open up to other people like lance. no one woman is an island, no matter how much of a bad b!tch you are.

🫧 also, i wanted to include it somewhere but basically, keith knew allura and romelle were hooking up since chapter 14! keith caught romelle sneaking out of allura's room early one morning and he just kept it to himself because snitches get stitches.

pidge

they are so precious to me. they're an amalgamation of 2 of my closest friends, and well, me.

i always knew that pidge was going to be a super important piece in klance development. while lance and keith are great friends, i think pidge played a crucial role in bridging them together in the beginning, before the two of them had cleared up their misunderstandings and made that truce. sure, allura asked them to be on the paintball team but pidge really forced the two of them into close quarters. lance might have extended the offer to keith to hand out without pidge or he might not have. honestly, i'm not really sure. but pidge inviting keith to hang out in chapter 4 was a quiet but big moment because both keith and lance are friends with pidge and will set aside their differences long enough to tolerate each other's presence in a shared space. pidge just has #babyofthefriendgroup privileges.

🫧 i honestly think that after the main two, pidge has undergone the most growth (physically and emotionally) throughout the fic, even though they're a supporting character. we can all benefit from community and friendship but i think pidge needed it a little bit more.

🫧 i partially wrote pidge to represent my younger self, especially when i first attended college. i was scared and alone and i had never been away from home and it was a struggle to form new relationships (and figure out my gender identity. mannnnnn fuck that). it was nice to see pidge find their place and niche among the greater social fabric of college, kind of like comforting my younger self for all the loneliness and uncertainty i endured.

hunk

i love hunk so dearly. ngl, i wanted him to have a bigger arc than he did but hopefully i did a decent job at making feel more well-rounded as a supporting character. i decided to actually kind of lean into this distance in the later chapters as well, esp from lance's pov, as they both got busier. at the end of the day, though, i knew that those two would come back together. hunk is a kind and sympathetic friend and his and lance's friendship will persevere because they're good communicators. their little talk in chapter 17 was me talking to myself and to anyone else who has went through a similar thing where they find themselves drifting a little farther from a friend.

people get busy and that's okay! there will be ebbs and flows in every relationship. even though shared history is a crucial part of a friendship but it can't be the only thing that will keep it going. you need to nurture it and tend to it in order for it to keep it alive and flourishing. hunk understands this and he and lance will be just fine after their talk. hunk is probably the most emotionally intelligent person after adam in the group, and i'm glad he was there to help both lance and keith out when they needed it.

adam

this man!!!!! got i have gotten so fucking attached to adam throughout this fic. he is so dear to me. i know in chapter 10 i wrote from adam's pov and he's a goofy guy in his twenties who's just trying to be a good dad friend but somehow he ended up being a voice of reason and comfort for klance in this fic. lance misses his family a lot and i think adam can not only relate to lance with the homesickness but also lance has started to rely on him a bit like he would with his siblings.

i wanted to try my own spin on adam and keith's relationship. i've seen fics where adam and keith hate each other, don't interact much, or adam takes on a parenting role towards keith as a kid. i wanted to look at keith and adam in the context of two people who both love shiro and then grow to be good friends/surrogate brother-in-law? idk. long story short, adam is very emotionally intelligent and i think he genuinely wanted to get to know keith outside of his connection with shiro and was patient enough to coax keith out of his shell. i tried to write in small ways adam takes care of keith like giving him LactoJoys because Keith likes the taste better than Lactaids, being there for him for his panic attack, adding food to his plate. things that won't draw too much attention, because we all know how keith is about receiving acts of kindness.

i mentioned this in a comment under one of the chapters but all of the advice adam gives keith is either advice i personally received myself or something i wish i could tell my younger self. i hope those words bring you comfort as well!

shiro

i had a lot more planned for shiro but goddammit i had no fucking time or space at this panned out. it's more so klance's story than shiro's.

look, there's a small moment in chapter 18 where shiro is very pleased (and a little surprised) that keith has talked about him with krolia. it has less to do with his faith in keith and more with how he sees himself. shiro has already acknowledged that he has heavy imposter syndrome and deals with his own struggles with self image. it's just always a jolt to your system when someone (could be your own family or your partner of years) validates your relationship.

shiro loves keith very much and just wants to be the best big brother. he has such eldest child syndrome, where he tries to pretend that everything is fine even though things are actually crumbling around him. the thing is, though, you can't build intimacy— real, lasting intimacy and depth in a relationship— without being vulnerable. shiro understands that even though he wants keith to work on opening up, he has to do the same and reciprocate the actions, or else neither of them will really get anywhere and be stuck in that loop of "are you mad at me/i feel like you're hiding something from me/i don't really know who you are."

i tried writing a bit from shiro's pov but i quickly realized that that would drastically change the tone of the fic so i had to scrap it. i might post a little oneshot in the distant future with adashi, though.

keith

🫧 i've talked about this before but although i think keith grew the most as a character in the canon show, that shit was WAY too fast and off-screen. also, i know that the whole found family trope is what drew a lot of fans to voltron in the first place (like me) but is the found family in the room with us rn? i felt like they all started to fall apart or at least weren't as close as the show wanted us to believe. it felt a lot like telling with no showing. other than some occasional moments in the show, the whole #teamasfamily felt hollow.

🫧 i wanted to build on this potential found family for keith's character. he's never had a support system before and he's used to pushing people away but now he has a whole ass friend group that's ready to fight for him if he gives the word.

🫧 initially, when i was writing keith's pov and trying to get a feel for his voice and tone, i struggled a bit. keith is one of those characters that i liked and sympathized with, but getting into his head was a whole different story. i'm more of a lance kinnie but once i got the hand of keith's voice, it was a lot easier. some of my best pieces of writing are from keith's pov! i tried to be as cognizant of keith's development as much as possible as i wrote (think me having various checkpoints for his journey whereas with lance i could just coast on vibes), and i'm pleased with how far he's come.

🫧 although both keith and lance's progress can showcased through their consciousness and thoughts (like duh ur reading from their povs), i leaned into keith's behavior as a way to portray his progress a bit more than lance. things like him being more open to physical affection, not sitting on the outskirts of group dynamics and sticking to shiro, and allowing himself to collect things, which by the way:

🫧 i like the idea of keith's room, once being so empty and ghost-like, is now full of stuff, mementos of his relationships that he's built. i tried to sprinkle in some relics from past chapters (paintball flag, polaroids, ticket stubs), as well add some new tidbits, like shiro giving him a cacti and that korean cookbook!

proud of u, keith bby <3

lance and marco

no i did not just torture lance for the sake of torturing him i would never do that to my boy.

i know this is a fanfiction, but from the start, i wanted to ground this fic in reality and breathe some life into it. lance's little arc with his brother having a substance abuse problem was loosely inspired by events in my personal life.

🫧 i'm not saying that everyone goes through something as drastic as a loved one going to rehab, but as young adults, when we leave home for uni, jobs, other opportunities, etc, there's this worry that something bad will happen while we're away. and often times it does. someone gets sick, a beloved pet passes away, it's all bound to happen. your childhood becomes a thing of the past, and things that you thought would stay the same just won't.

i projected a lot of my feelings onto lance ngl, and writing him work through his own grief and guilt over not being able to be with his family when they're going through a crisis helped me process a little bit more.

although lance had a happier ending than a lot of families might get in reality, i still wanted to show lance having a support system at college and realizing that he has a second family to lean on, and people who love and support him. he doesn't have to pretend to be okay for anyone and that's okay.

black paladin lance or as close to it as i could get

it was so important for me to make lance the new captain of their paintball team, as a stand-in for the black paladin arc he could have had in the show. he’s always been a selfless guy who puts others first and really pulls up when he needs to. he deserves to be recognized for that. not only did every single one of his friends validate him, but the person he looks up to the most literally endorsed him. lance struggles with his inferiority complex and the election scene was a little feel good moment for me, personally, so that he could receive the acknowledgement he deserves, especially with his growth. he's gonna be an awesome team captain (he'll be shuffling down to shiro's room at 2am covered in hickeys and talking about paintball strategies).

wrapping up loose ends

i tried to wrap up as many loose ends as possible and give all the characters a proper send-off. originally i wanted lance and hunk to also move into the house in castle street, like repurpose the basement or something but i realized that that just wasn’t possible because most college basements don’t even have heating or like,,,, a livable arrangement.

ultimately, i think it makes sense for pidge to be the one to take up allura’s room at the house. pidge has lived a single during the academic year but they also had lance and hunk right fifty feet away so it’s not like they REALLY lived alone that year. there was also the logistics of the house having a vacant room, and as much as i would have loved to have all of voltron under the same roof (hunk and pidge sharing a room, keith and lance sharing a room), i think they would kill each other. pidge filling in the gap felt like the right move. and lance and hunk are gonna be over a lot anyways, so it’s not like much has changed in the trio's group dynamic.

🫧 what was your favorite chapter to write?

i think i have different chapters in mind for different reasons, even if it's a copout answer. here are the chapters that are dearest to me:

chapter 4: recalibration this is the chapter where i really got to play around with character interactions. keith and lance's worlds were beginning to integrate in chapter 3 but in this chapter, i got to explore different friendships, like keith & pidge and lance & hunk, and the dynamics they entailed. you can see how important these friendships are to both lance and keith, and how their connection with others eventually helps them to reflect on their previous feelings toward each other, like "hmm maybe i've been too harsh with the other."

chapter 10: let's go to the beach the group dynamics were so solidified to this point, and it was so fun to write. i loved writing from adam's pov and being able to zoom out and showcase klance's relationship progression.

the winter break interludes i waxed poetic about these in a previous faq but to reiterate: i'm really pleased with the way each individual chapter turned out. i love a good character study, and it was a great challenge to my writing and characterization to dig deeper into their home lives and see how the past confronted the present, where their respective childhoods were brought into the light, and how long-held notions of belonging, home, and identity were challenged and remolded.

chapter 17: warm and light my beta reader drunkenguac said that this was some of my best writing and i've been coasting off of that validation for the past 4 months. keith's reunion with his mother was especially cathartic for me. as an adoptee, writing this chapter honestly helped me work through some of my feelings about my adoption as i pictured what it would look like if i was ever reunited with my birth mother. i'm very fortunate that i didn't have to go through the same experiences keith did, but i tried to imbue as much humanness as possible into his section.

chapter 18: moving on it just felt like a proper send-off, the one that we never got from s8 of voltron. i wanted the last chapter to basically have this vibe of "hey, things won't be the same but it's going to be okay because we have each other." when shiro tells matt in the end, "we'll still be here," that's me as the author, telling you, the reader, that this fic will still be here whenever you want to revisit it. it was a comfort to write and i've heard that it's a comfort to read, which is so so so gratifying. when i set out to write this fic in august of 2023, i didn't have any plans of grandeur or even expect like more than 100 people read it— it was just a passion project that i decided to share, and i'm glad that others have sought safety in it. outside of fandom, this fic is a love letter to my own college experience. i remember reading a college au fic when i was still in high school and lonely and closeted and repressed and wondering if i would ever be able to get out of my hometown and find a community as tightly-knit as the fic portrayed it. in a way, i got to reflect on my college experience by writing looking out for you. i find solace in this fic when i read back over it, and i can see aspects of my adventures throughout my freshman and sophomore and junior and senior years, waving from behind a thinly veiled curtain. this fic is dedicated to all the people who made my college experience.

anyways that's me rambling for now! thank you again to everyone who has tuned into looking out for you. this is the first piece of creative writing i've done in a long time, and i never expected to actually finish it. i'm so happy with the way it turned out and the love it's received. until next time!