#I’m going to spend my life alone while everyone I know and love finds partners and becomes a unit with someone in a way I’ll never get to be

[justmeinadaze]

What about a girl who on the surface seems to be happy. She's the one that is always there for people no matter what. Yet no one is there for her when she really needs someone. In a dark day where she thinks if she leaves the world no ones life would really change because she never really meant anything to other people. But Eddie finds her in a really bad state and somehow talks to her down and slowly overtime helps her feel wanted and loved. Shows her she's not alone.

A/N: I pushing this request and another someone gave me together because they were very similar. I get this to the core of my being and please never forget you aren't alone <3. You matter and the world is 100 time better because you're in it.

Warnings: Heavy material, mentions of emotional pain and depression especially feeling like no one cares and feeling like a burden. Enter with caution. I imagine a lot of us here have felt this at least at one point in our life.

Word Count: 2476

Everything is loud. 

Especially that voice that tells you no one cares.  Yeah you have your friends but they have their partners and their families. Yeah you have work but that’s all it is…work. The people you help are there for just that. As soon as you leave their peripherals it’s like you no longer exist. You have your family but it always feels like they are looking for number one…themselves. You’ve done everything for so many people and yet it feels like no one would do the same for you. 

It's not like you expect anyone to. You do things for people because you genuinely want to. Sometimes, however, it would just to be nice to feel like you were someone else’s first choice… 

Someone who woke up and was excited because they knew they were going to get to spend their day with you. Someone who while out in the world saw something random and their first thought was to call you to tell you. Someone who when you needed something whether it be to laugh or shoulder to cry on wouldn’t hesitate to be there. Someone who asked about your day because they were genuinely curious and not because they needed something. Someone who loved you unconditionally because you’re you.

It was a slow build up to tonight.

It starts with the little voice throughout your day telling you that no one would care. They’ll all move on after you’re gone. How long would it even take for someone to notice? No one calls unless they need something and you’re always the one to text first. You initiate meet ups with your friends and even then it’s hard to get everyone together. You fade in the background at work unless your boss needs someone to belittle. 

You haven’t seen your family face to face in so long. They always say their busy or their schedules are tight. Sometimes you call just to talk to your parents and no one answers. 

You had tried dating but most people you met up with just wanted sex. Anytime you tried finding a genuine connection, it was met with an innuendo that made your eyes roll. 

Today was particularly hard. Your account was overdrawn and you didn’t know how you were going to make it to the next check. Your boss said you seemed distracted and that you need to get your numbers to a better place or else you’d get a write up that could lead to a termination. You called your sister during your break but she didn’t answer instead posting online a selfie with her and her friends at lunch. You messaged a friend with a joke hoping to start a conversation about your worries without coming off like a bother. 

“I’m so exhausted. I wish I could meet a millionaire so I don’t have to work anymore lol”

She responded with a simple laughing emoji. 

You laid in bed scrolling through your phone at all the happy photos of people with their partners, other friends, and or children. They all seemed genuinely happy…why couldn’t you? You were really good at playing content but it took every ounce of energy you had. You didn’t want to pretend anymore. 

You wanted to place the weight of everything down for even just one day of relief while someone took you in their arms and told you that you were safe. 

The voice was practically screaming now in your head that you would never get that relief. The only way to end the pain is to remove yourself entirely from the equation. 

Your logic brain knew it didn’t want that but you didn’t know how to turn it off. 

Opening your front door, you ran outside in the rain in no particular direction hoping that you would end up wherever you were meant to be. You don’t know how long you were on your feet but suddenly you were swept off them as you fell forward into the mud beneath you. 

You heard a faint voice but it was hard to understand under the wind and thunder that shook the sky. A leather jacket covered your arms before you were lifted by your biceps and carried into a home nearby. 

“Jesus, sweetheart. Are you insane? You’re going to get yourself killed walking out there in this weather.”, the boy scolded as he shook his hair like a dog and took off the shirt he was wearing without any hesitation. “Fuck. Here let me take that here.” Grabbing his jacket, he rung it out in the kitchen and hung it on the counter. 

You watched him with wide eyes as he moved around what you realized was a trailer with purpose. 

“Alright, here’s a towel. Do you need to use my phone to call someone or—” The towel he handed you promptly feel to the floor when you didn’t reach out to take it from him, giving him pause as you both stared at it on the ground. 

His bare feet scooted against the rug as he placed himself in front of you and bent down to grab the towel again. You could feel his eyes scanning over you and when you glanced up to meet them you noticed they know reflected concern. 

“You know what? I’m being rude. I haven’t even introduced myself and I just pulled you into my humble abode.” With a big tooth filled grin, he extended his arms out wide and bowed. “My name is Eddie Munson and you are…?” He waits but when you don’t respond, he nonchalantly shakes his head as he stands to his full height again. “No worries. You can tell me when you’re ready. Um, I don’t think a towel will be enough and since it’s still storming you are more than welcome to use our shower. I have some fresh clothes you can change into and we can wash the mud off your outfit. If you want, of course. No pressure.”

“O-Ok.”

One of his eyebrows quirks at the sound of your voice before he flashes you another soft smile.

“Ok? Cool.”

***

When you step out of the shower, you can’t help but feel more relaxed under the steam that filled the bathroom. Eddie’s cigarette smelling clothes added an extra layer of comfort as they hung off your small frame. Glancing at the items on the sink, you smiled at the aftershave and hair product that lingered. Picking up his cologne, your smile grew as you inhale the smell that could best be described as home. You could get lost in that smell…

Continuing to dry your hair as you headed towards his room, you found the metalhead shoveling arms full of clothes that were on his floor into the closet. 

“Oh, uh, hey. Sorry. Yeah…my room isn’t usually this messy but…”

“It’s fine. I’m sorry for ruining your night.”

His face visibly scrunched in confusion as he took a seat on the edge of his bed. 

“What makes you think you ruined my night?”

“I just…kind of…appeared.”

“Nice, pretty girl like you shows up on my doorstep. Introverts dream right there, honey.”, he chuckles as you blush. “Naw, you didn’t ruin my night. I was just going to lay here, smoke some weed and listen to some music. Would, um, would you like to join me?”

You think for a moment as your eyes take him in. Eddie had changed out of his wet clothes and put on a long sleeve shirt with some shorts that reached past his knees. His hair had begun to dry and frizz in an adorable manner that had butterflies flutter in your tummy. 

“Ok.”

“Yeah? Cool.”

“Y/N.” As he slides down to the floor, his head tilts when he hears you speak. “That’s my name.”

Grinning, he reaches under his bedside table and pulls out a little box with a couple of joints pre rolled within. 

“That’s very beautiful. So Y/N, is there a particular genre I should stay away from or are you openminded with music?”

“I’d like to think I’m pretty open minded.”

Eddie lights the end of the paper between his lips and his chest moves with every inhale and exhale before passing it to you. The effects are immediate as you feel calmness wash over you, handing it to him before laying on your back beside him. 

While you continue to listen to the music that plays neither of you says a word as you pass the joint freely between each other. The most recent song ends and a guitar rift begins to play that you feel like you’ve heard before. When you turn to look his way, your eyes lock with his earnest ones as if he’s waiting for you to recognize it. 

When the singer begins to sing the lyrics, your eyes close as you grab your stomach and laugh harder than you felt like you ever had before. Watching the way your personality unfolded has Eddie cackling with you until you were finally able to catch your breath. 

“Is that a fucking rock version of Lil Wayne’s ‘Lollipop’?! Oh my god it sounds amazing.”

“I have this weird fascination with rap songs turned into metal covers. It just tickles my funny bone the right way.”

“I love it.”

“And I love your laugh. It’s infectious.”

Glancing his way, you softly smile as you pass him the last of the bud in your hand for him to finish. 

“Thank you.”

“It’s nice to see you smile. You seemed a bit sad when you came in.”

“Yeah…we don’t have to talk about it though.”

“Do you not WANT to talk about it?”

“No, I just…you don’t wanna hear all that heavy stuff.”, you sigh as you sit up and lean against his dresser. 

“I mean I want to hear more about you, Y/N, and if that ‘heavy stuff’ is a part of you than I wanna hear it.”, he responds as he sits up as well. 

“You don’t know me, Eddie.”

“I’m trying to, sweetheart.”

“Why?”

“What do you mean why?”

“Why do you want to know? Like I said you don’t know me. Why do you care?”

“I care because I want to know why a gorgeous, seemingly kind woman like you was walking out alone at night during a thunderstorm. Whatever caused her to do that must be really hurting her and I know how much that sucks. I want to help…if I can.”

Your eyes take him in as he pulls his knees to his chest and wraps his arms around them to hold them in place. It was so odd to feel safe with someone you didn’t know. You weren’t sure if it was his smooth voice, the intense yet soft hues of his own eyes, or the protective concerned energy that surrounded him but you decided to take a leap and let go.

“When I get lonely…sometimes the voices in my head…get too loud. Not like you know voices, voices but just like that little voice…that makes the world…seem hopeless.”

“Like…no one cares about you to put you first and maybe the world would somehow be better without you in it?” When your gaze shifts his way, you find his have moved to the void in the floor in front him. “Yeah, I know how that feels especially when you hear it being reiterated with that voice.”

“It’s like an extra weight is pushing down on me and I can’t breathe.”

“You just want someone to take off some of that slack and tell you everything is going to be ok. And not because they want something or because they feel like they have to but because they genuinely want to.”

As you nod, you hastily try to dry the tears that fall before he notices.

“Y/N? I promise everything is going to be ok.” When Eddie slid closer to you, you couldn’t stop yourself as you climbed into his lap and curled into his broad chest as his arms circled around you. “You’re safe and the world is 1000 times better because you’re here.”

He continued to coo softly that everything was ok, rocking you gently in his arms as you continued to cry. 

################

Six Months Later

You beam as you hold Eddie’s hand at the table with your friend and her date as you wait for your food to served. 

“Hey, you know what would be fun? Maybe after we eat, we can head over to Scoops and try that new peanut flavor they have.”

“Oh, yeah!”, your friend exclaims with bright eyes. “I heard it’s so delicious.”

“I mean ice cream sounds great but Y/N can’t have that flavor. She’s allergic remember?”, your boyfriend replies nonchalantly as he quietly thanks the waiter as he places plates down in front of everybody. Without skipping a beat, Eddie opens your burger and steals your pickles he knows you give him every time before wrapping his arm around your shoulders as he eats with his free hand. 

Since that first night you met him, everything came almost easy with Eddie. For the first time, you felt heard and understood. Those first couple of months, you half expected him to disappear but every day he showed up with the same enthusiasm that made your heart want to explode. 

The first time you two fought, he realized it was because you were afraid to be open. 

“Sweetheart, how am I supposed to know it bothers you if you don’t tell me?”

“I just…I don’t want to lose you. I like you a lot, Eddie, and I’m afraid—”

“To be yourself? Baby, I like you a lot to. YOU… not some image of you. Don’t make yourself unhappy to make me happy. I don’t want that.”

From that moment on, you did everything you could to express how you felt and every time he tried to meet you in the middle. Every bad day, you were there for each other no questions asked. Every good day, you relished especially the small moments where you two would just lay on the floor and listen to music enjoying each other’s company without feeling like he’d rather be somewhere else. 

You were his first choice and he was yours. 

“How about we go to the arcade? They have that ice cream shop next door and then we can play some pool.”, you suggest knowing Eddie can smoke while you guys play as the music you both like plays. 

“That sounds like fun.”, your friend grins. “I’m not good with pool but I know Adam likes to show off.”

“So does Ed.”, you giggle. 

“Pfft, like you don’t like watching me bend over the table when I shoot my shot.”, he teases as he throws a wink your way before kissing your forehead.

##############

Eddie Asks/ Donate to me :)

Just in case y'all wanted to hear the song :P

[ikigaisvt]

lucky

in which your boyfriend realizes how lucky he is to have you.

pairing: idol!jeonghan x gender neutral!reader words: 1.6k content: fluff, comfort warnings: jeonghan is exhausted/sad and he cries, petnames (for jeonghan: angel, babe, baby, love / for reader: precious), mention of food and eating. note 1.0: omg sammy posting smth?!?? thought we'd never see that again,,, felt like writing fluff lately since i feel there's a Lot of smut for seventeen so here i am feeding my own wishes note 2.0: this idea came after seeing the last inside seventeen where jeonghan looked tired at the end (and it's so unusual of him, to show how tough something is). also felt awful yesterday night, and instead of being comforted by him, i wished to comfort him. minors are allowed to interact but please don't follow. hope everyone likes it, please be nice i haven't wrote anything in month,, reblog/feedbacks are always appreciated!

Jeonghan has always felt lucky to be an idol. Of course, as any job does, it has its downsides – and this one has a lot, despite what he can say. He never once complained about his job, no matter what can happen. Being able to share his love for music to his fans, his brothers by his side is the biggest blessing of his life. That is well known to his family, his fans but mostly you, his partner, who hears him pours his heart out about his job until dawn.

However, there are days when it is harder than usual; days where practice or filming is so hard, he wishes to go home and sleep the worries away; days where he questions if he actually was made for that job. Today, that came in the form of a hard practice. What maybe Jeonghan hasn’t realized yet is how lucky he is to have you, especially at the end of a tough day.

 You haven’t seen your boyfriend a lot lately as he was busier than usual; preparing for his new comeback as well as going overseas to film content. However, as he has been back from Hungary a few days ago, you knew you’d be able to see him again today. You spent hours cleaning your apartment, cooking his favorite meals and stocking up on his favorite drinks, picking shows and music to listen to so you could spend the night talking, catching up together and laughing at the new memories he made. You were looking forward to it, but most importantly, you were looking forward to seeing him again. To feel his presence, to hear his voice and laugh and to be able to touch him. Oh, how much you missed him.

As you finished preparing everything for him, you were lounging on your couch, the TV playing quietly in the background. Looking at the hour on your phone, you realized it was almost 11pm – which meant you were only minutes away from seeing your boyfriend. Getting up from the couch, you went to the kitchen to warm up his meal. You started pulling out different plates – jajagmyeon, tangsuyuk, kimchi pancakes and tteokbokki. "Okay, maybe I made too much this time, but I just want him to eat well," you think out loud. While you were filling smaller plates with side dishes, you heard the door opening, signaling that your boyfriend was finally home. Leaving the food behind, you left the kitchen to find your boyfriend – disheveled, hair picking out in all ways and tiredness showing on his face, struggling to get his shoes off.

“Jeonghan,” you call out to him softly, his head lifting up to find your eyes. And that’s when you realize how tired he really is. His smile is meekly showing up, his hair looks like he ran his hand through it multiple times – which is something he does when he is frustrated, dark circles are showing under his eyes but mostly, his eyes look sad, the usual playful lightness in them gone. “Are you okay?” you ask, your hand reaching out to him to let him know he is not alone.

“I-” he starts, his voice breaking a little bit, before clearing his throat, “I’m okay, I just can’t seem to get my shoes off.” he says, bending once again to work on the shoelaces.

You watch him for only a few seconds before sitting on the little step in your entryway, “Here, let me help you,” you say, gently tapping the floor in front of you, silently telling him to put his feet forward as you chase his fingers away.

“Babe, no-” he starts protesting, his fingers brushing with yours, trying to untie the knot faster.

“Shh,” you say calmly, getting a hold of his fingers, squeezing and letting go to work on the knots again, his feet slightly moving towards you, “You really tightened those well. That’s good, don’t want you falling down on your shoelaces during practice.” You say lightly, trying to make your boyfriend lighten up. You get his first shoe off, placing it gently next to yours, before working on the second one. As you were almost done with the second knot, you feel something wet falling on your hand, and you look up to see Jeonghan looking down at you, eyes filled with tears.

“Hey, hey, hey,” you say, getting a hold of his hand, “You’re okay, it’s fine,” you reassure him, squeezing his fingers tighter as he looks away from you, ears slightly red from the embarrassment of crying in front of you, his girlfriend. That’s such a Jeonghan thing, you tell yourself, “Let me get this one off and then we’ll get you to the couch, okay?” you tell him, earning a little nod as an answer. You get his second shoe off in record time and gently get up from the ground as you reach out for his hand, pulling him behind you as you lead him to the living room.

Reaching the couch, you make him sit down first before sitting down next to him, pulling your linked hands on your lap, your thumb slightly caressing his hand, “Are you okay?” you ask gently, trying to find his eyes but all he does is look down at his lap.

“I’m okay- Sorry about all this, practice was hard and I know you were excited about having a good time but stuffs happened and yeah-” he starts ranting as you listen intently to whatever he has to say, “Ah, sorry again. I’m rambling. I’m okay,” he says again, almost as he tries to convince himself, too, “Really.” He confirms as he meets your eyes, his smile not even reaching his cheeks.

“Love, you may be able to lie to your members but this doesn’t work with me,” you chuckle slightly, “What can I do?”

“I-” he starts, blush creeping on his neck again, his eyes looking around the room, “Will you hold me?” he whispers, hoping you heard him right as he finds your eyes again.

“Of course, angel,” you say as you lean back on the couch, opening your arms for him, his head finding a place to rest on your chest, “Let’s just stay like that for a little while, hm?” you whisper as you start running your fingers through his hair, “You can tell me anything, in case you need to pour it out.”

A few minutes passes by where you can only hear his soft breath – and little sniffles, his body slightly relaxing into yours as if it realizes it’s now finally home. “Practice was so hard today,” he says softly, his arm squeezing your waist a little more, your shirt getting wet with more tears, “That new choreography requires so much attention to details and we need to keep our energy up throughout all of it. I guess I wasn’t prepared to put that much work in it today.” He sighs as you let him know you’re still listening through little hums, “And we’ve just been back from Hungary, my body is still used to that time zone so I have a hard time sleeping. Also, I’ve missed you so I haven’t been able to recharge my batteries at all.” He admits, knowing he would have felt better if he saw you more in the past month.

“I’ve missed you too,” you tell him, leaving a little kiss on the top of his head.

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes again, “For my mood and for ruining tonight.” He says softly, as more tears fall down.

“Baby, angel,” you say, your voice almost breaking to seeing your boyfriend like this, “Please don’t ever be sorry. Your job is not easy, you’re doing so much at all times and you do it well. It’s only normal for you to break down from time to time,” you whisper, running your fingers down his back, “I am so glad you decided to still come to me. It means the world. Please always come to me,” you tell him as he looks up at you, “Anytime you break down, I’ll help you build yourself up stronger, okay? You didn’t ruin anything, you’ll never do so. Your presence is always welcomed, no matter your mood. I love you so much.”

“I love you too, precious.” He says, as he gets up a little to meet your lips. You can taste the sadness – and the saltiness of his tears – on his lips as you take it away from him, take everything bad away from him, lodging it deep in your own body. So it can never hurt him again. You kiss once, you kiss twice, you kiss thrice; you kiss until there is no more sadness within him. You kiss until he can feel how you will always be here for him.

“Feeling better?” you question as you pull away from his lips, brushing hair out of his face and meeting his now shining eyes.

“Very much so,” he chuckles lightly, his forehead resting on yours, “Thank you,” he says, leaving a kiss on your forehead before finding rest on your shoulder.

“Wanna eat now?” you ask, still running your fingers along his back.

“Yes actually,” he says, looking up at you, “I’m so hungry,” he says in a whisper, still making no attempt to move away from you.

 “I made so much, I hope you’ll love it,” you answer him, still not getting up either.

“Let’s just- Let’s just stay like this for a little longer, hm?” he tells you, wrapping his arms around your middle, cuddling even closer – if that’s even possible, “Food can wait.”

Jeonghan truly feels lucky to be an idol – on most days, at least. But if he had to mention one thing, he feels the luckiest about – it’s to be your boyfriend.

aaaaa thank you so much for reading! i forgot how nervewracking it was to post something- please like, reblog, comment and i'll love you forever!!

[acidballz]

music is the most powerful thing ever (emotional rant ⚠️)

i’m very much going through it chat. i recently made the decision to go no contact with my mom, i am temporarily moved in with my partner and their parents and they gave us 6 months to find an apartment.

my mom and i have a very codependent relationship. i am diagnosed with BPD, and i am almost certain she is undiagnosed with the same thing. thus she is the woman i understand the most, i have dedicated most of my childhood to being as kind and understanding to her as possible despite the manipulation and cruelty, because i knew it came from a world of hurt and pain and trauma that i couldn’t even imagine going through. i love her and did my best to try and get her to see things in a different perspective, and to take care of her as much as i could, but i can hardly take care of myself. she relies on me emotionally as if i am her best friend or sometimes even a life partner. if i don’t do something right, or im not around enough, or i can’t drop everything to go out of my way for her in the very second she asks, she guilt trips so hard it guilts me into hating myself more and more every single time. she refuses to even acknowledge that i may ever want to part with her, and im 22 years old.

it’s been the hardest thing i’ve ever had to do, and the hardest parts aren’t even over. i haven’t talked to her yet, i haven’t gotten my things, all i have established is a safety net. im terrified, it feels like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. i felt so alone in this emotion, but i have a place to stay and save up. i’m so grateful to my partners parents for giving me this opportunity. they show me so much love and kindness, a tenderness i’ve never recieved except for from their kid. they raised a beautiful, and incredible person that i want to spend the rest of my life with. i wouldn’t have been able to do any of this without them.

my wonderful friends gave me advice and helped me get my mind off things for a while, they also offered to let me store a lot of my things and their place. i am losing my family, but i have my chosen family on my side and that is enough. when my partner and i were driving home, i put on this song by fall out boy. they have been my favorite band since i was 12, so 10 years now. their music has helped me through some of my worst moments. this song felt particularly close to home. i also had an edible so i was like, really feeling the lyrics and the tone of the song.

my partner and i aren’t the most functional adults, we’re both drop outs who are barely skating by, feeling like we’re just old kids that never grew up. this situation feels too real for both of us. we are the kids who didn’t make it. i’m not doing as well as my partner is, but i know they’re scared too. with my BPD mood swings (fun!) i have been constantly flip flopping between terrified and hopeless, and overtly excited and naive. it’s been really overwhelming, i feel like im half dead when my brain isn’t screaming at me.

with my mom, i have felt like i need to compare myself to everyone around me. i needed to be better than my siblings who didn’t make it, i needed to be better than my father who used drugs to hide from his past, i needed to be kinder to my mom because in my young eyes the world had wholly treated her unkindly, i needed to be the best kid. i needed to prove myself, and i crumbled under the weight of all of those expectations our relationship had forced me to take on. i listened to this song and closed my eyes, and i let myself feel the weight of everything i went through with her. it felt like it was going to crush me, but i let myself feel it anyways. i cried silently to not disturb my partner, not because i didn’t want them to see me cry, but because i wanted to feel entirely present and alone in that moment with myself only. i don’t take the time to do that, and i needed to.

when people say music saves lives, this is what they mean. the music itself doesn’t save people, but it inspires people to relate, to introspect, and most importantly to feel. music is powerful, and powerful music looks different to everyone. but to me, this song is more than just a song, it’s an inspiration for me to continue going. a reminder that no matter how much i feel like i didn’t make it, and that i deserve to feel guilty and suffer for not being perfect, im still here and im fighting for myself. i won’t let myself go back.

[ff7-has-taken-me-over]

“You’re in love with Angeal. Aren’t you?”

Zack froze, and he swore it was only for a micro second but he could see the way Cloud’s frown deepened. Just a touch.

“What? What gave you that idea?”

Cloud continued to stare at him, his gaze searching and features stoic as ever. It was the first time Zack had ever been faced with that look and he honestly hoped it would be the last. He understood what people meant when they said Cloud could be unnerving sometimes.

“You don’t have to deny it you know. It’s ok.”

Zack scoffed, throwing away all pretences and crossing his arms. He knew Cloud wasn’t but he couldn’t help but feel like he was being accused, even with the blond giving him a small, reassuring smile.

“It’s not like that Cloudy. I just look up to him is all.”

It was Cloud’s turn to scoff this time, rolling his eyes just for the extra sting of disbelief.

“I look up to Sephiroth but I don’t look at him like I look at you.”

The blond coaxed his arms out from their position across his chest, holding his hands gently while trying to catch his gaze.

“Zack. I love you. So if you want to, I dunno. Confess or explore a relationship or even just be with Angeal alone, I’ll support you.”

Zack couldn’t help but glare at his partner, hurt and a little offended that he’d just disregard himself in this situation. Or expect Zack to do that to him in the first place.

“What the fuck Cloud? What do you want me to just leave you? Is this some fucked up way of you trying to break up with me?”

Cloud gave a soft laugh, and in the edges of it Zack could hear how much the thought of it hurt Cloud. How much he didn’t want to be talking about this in the moment. So why the hell was he?

“Fuck no Zack. I’d quite literally fight a platoon to keep you by my side. But I see the way you look at Angeal and I can see how sad you are when you come home after missions or training with him.”

The blond took a deep breath, and when he let it out his eyes shone like he was letting his emotions out with it.

“I just- I don’t want you to come home one day and see the disappointment when it’s me waiting for you and not him.”

Zack felt like his heart was splitting in two with the words, and he felt like such an asshole when Cloud looked away to hide the welling tears in his eyes. Cloud never cried. Only ever let himself do so once when he’d thought his mother had gotten deathly ill and he couldn’t find a way to get back to Nibelheim.

Zack hadn’t realised he was being that easy to read. Had thought he was burying the feelings far enough down that they were hidden away from everyone. Especially Cloud himself.

He still loved Cloud. Gaia, he was still so madly in love with him it made him stupid sometimes. But there’d always been something with Angeal that he’d never looked at too closely. Always brushing it off as hero worship and burning any thoughts he had with a bonfire.

Somehow they’d gotten the better of him though, and in the process he’d hurt the one person he swore he wouldn’t.

“Cloud I-”

He couldn’t lie to him. He wouldn’t lie to him. Not after hurting him this much and putting this much doubt in his head.

“Yes. I love him.”

Clouds breath hitched, but instead of the devastation Zack expected he was just met with an understanding smile, tears breaking from the corners of his eyes as he pursed his mouth closed.

“But I love you as well. Fuck cloudy, I’m so fucking sorry I ever let you doubt it. Yes I love him, but I’m still so madly in love with you and I will do anything to make it up to you.”

Zack felt desperate. Felt like his relationship, the love of his life, was going to slip through his fingers like sand if he wasn’t careful. He could never be disappointed coming home to Cloud. Would always be happy to see the blond and spend the rest of his life with him.

“Please Cloudy, just- please.”

It didn’t feel right asking anything of the blond. Felt like he was being selfish if he asked anything else of him. Made him feel icky and like he’d already cheated if he were to ask the blond to not leave him. Ask him to forget it all and move on. Felt wrong to even suggest it.

Cloud had always been the more sensible one between them. No matter what everyone said about him he was probably more emotionally adept than Angeal himself, and that man made it a point of his personality to be like that.

“I’m not gonna leave you Zack. Unfortunately for you I’m stuck to you until one of us dies. Although even then you probably wouldn’t get rid of me.”

Zack couldn’t help but laugh, his own tears welling up now as he gripped at Cloud’s hands with all the desperation he could muster.

“But if you really wanna make it up to me. At least confess to Angeal. If not for your own peace of mind then for mine.”

Zack didn’t really know how that would give Cloud peace of mind. If their roles were reversed he would have denied everything and pretended it never existed. Hoped against hope that Cloud would just forget about the other person and live out his days with him.

Though maybe that’s where Cloud was coming from. Not wanting to live on a constant knifes edge of anxiety about whether or not Zack would suddenly flip a switch. Decide that yeah, he was better with Angeal and he wasn’t as in love with Cloud as he thought.

Zack could certainly deny it to hell and back in the moment but no amount of reassurances was going to work on Cloud. Not when the man was always set on self sabotage and self depreciation. Whether it was intentional or not was always a toss up and Zack was always all too ready to try and fix it. In whatever way necessary.

This instance just so happened to be by confessing to his mentor and long time friend.

[risingscorchingsuns]

hey guys! my posting/writing/general activity is probably going to get a little slower for a bit. i’ll still be here, but im going through a tough time right now. its been a frankly pretty awful week and im getting the feeling its gonna be rough for at least a solid minute. longer explanation below if you���d like it, but tw for mentions of trauma and abuse.

So ive mentioned it before, but i have complex PTSD. my parents split when i was very young, and my stepmom moved in with my dad almost immediately afterwards. when i try and remember it too much my brain gets foggy, but to put it simply, she was horrifically abusive to me and my younger siblings. she resented us for being born, as living reminders that my mother got to my father first. for over a decade she was the sole adult influence in my life, and from the age of eleven she manipulated me to believe she was the only person in the world i could trust. she bullied me for my neurodivergence, my appearance, my interests, anything she could get to lord over me. i had no escape for most of my formative years, because she cut me off and isolated me from any form of support I could possibly have, from trying to force me to change schools to convincing me my own father gave up on me. I only cut her off permanently last year.

Summers are really, really hard for me. When she and my dad moved across the country, I had to spend summers in Texas with her, and her alone. I had nobody. In a state far away from everyone who loved me, where she had full control and access to any form of communication. She’d regularly go through my messages I sent to friends, partners, even my mother to make sure I wasn’t “making up lies about her”. I was trapped, and completely, utterly isolated. Every day was about survival, and every day was about just making it to that night, through that hour, through that minute. Every single minute I lived in anticipation of the next, walking on eggshells to appease her impossible standards. When the weather starts to get warmer, my brain starts to anticipate going back there. I shut down, and go into survival mode. I have a tendency to isolate, though it’s something I’m working on.

The weather is starting to warm up where I live. I’m starting to get nightmares again, and I wake up feeling heavy. I’m stressed out all the time, and I constantly feel either hypervigilant to the point of paralysis, or completely dissociated. I know I’m in for a rough patch until my brain realizes I dont have to go back, and settles down my trauma responses. But it may be a while before that happens. I only ask to please be patient with me for a little while. I’m really sorry.

It’s hard for me to admit I’m not doing well. I might take this down if I find myself overthinking it. I will have good days, I always do. But for now, I’m in a bit of a dark place, and I deeply apologize for the resulting change in my interactions. I love you all deeply, and I want you to know I’m safe- I have a support system, and I dont ever have to see her again. I’m in a better place than I used to be, and I’m stronger every year. But the weather is starting to warm up, and I’m starting to shut down.

Please be well. I’ll respond to things as best I can, and I’ll still be around when I’m able.

Leon 🪲

[bloughjobs]

Life and Love

Feeling nostalgic and weird. These last few days, I've been going through a ton of old messages and posts from 8-10 years ago. It is such a strange feeling to see how time comes and goes without you realizing how much everything has changed, and then suddenly you’re living a completely different life.

Ten years ago today, I was broken into so many excruciating pieces over a boy who couldn't even decide if he still loved me after not seeing me for a whole 7 days… LOL. Can you believe it? I really thought I'd be depressed (or at least alone) forever.

But fuck, I am so HAPPY I took the chance to change everything and experience real love. I'm doing everything I dreamed of and said I'd do back then, and I'm doing it with the true love of my life.

More and more often, I find myself stopping simply just to think about how unbelievably grateful I am to live the life I do. I truly am living my dream with my favorite person in the world, and we have a connection that I’ve never experienced before. We've made it so that we've gotten to spend virtually every minute together for the last 7.5+ years, playing and working with each other in a multitude of different places. We’ve lived in tents, campers, a van, a yurt, a cabin, fancy pool house, a barn, 2 apartments, and now we have our own 3-bedroom HOUSE with a finished basement and screened in porch. It is so cool to have experienced all of these different ways of living together all over the country, and I’m excited to see what comes next!

So many new experiences with a vast amount of free time and few responsibilities while we are still young af; seriously, what is better than this?

I can genuinely say I have the kind of relationship I always knew could exist between two people, but which I could never find in the couples around me growing up. How I was fortunate enough to not only find something so rare and precious, but also to find it at such a young age, I'll never know. He's shown me what it is to be truly loved by another person, to be their sole priority, always. To never have to wonder if he's changing his mind or thinking about anyone else, ever. To be safe in another person.

I've found what every person dreams of, but very few ever actually find: my best friend, lover, protector, life partner in all things. I wish everyone could experience a love and life like ours. I don't ever want to take this for granted, so I will soak up every minute of our existence together.

I guess I just wanted to document these thoughts because I don't post a lot of updates on my life anymore. I actually don't believe I still even have any followers who know me in real life. So this is mostly just for myself lol. But if you're creeping and knew me 10 years ago, and happen to be very bored, maybe you'll have enjoyed reading this.

[alterrune]

Color My World

Darkhold: Henry Stickmin and Ellie Rose

…

I’m gonna be honest with you, “Color My World” is the Darkhold Story I’ve had the most fun writing so far, solely because I wanted to make something crazy. I know how to write romance, I’ve read and watched a-lot of it to know how to do it to a degree.

On top of this, for better or worse, the Yandere trope inspired me to write this, which I will shamelessly admit is something I’m into and enjoy, because at least you know they’ll always love you, care for you, and never betray you, so long as it’s not taken to an extreme where it makes me uncomfortable. 

I’m someone who has standards when it comes to this kind of trope and I prefer something that’s healthy.

Which really makes me wish Yuri from DDLC had a happier outcome alongside everyone else, especially Monika.

Thus this story is a personal favorite of mine as a result. Yes, I’m crazy, and I’m fully aware of it. Take that information as you will.

So I decided, why not make a Darkhold Story about Love?

As such, “Color My World” is a romantic story twisted in its own right, about how dangerous passion can sometimes be, and how far one can go for affection.

While the Darkhold story revolved mainly around Henry, Ellie also played a major role in this story, so it is a Darkhold Story for both of them.

This is one of the types of love stories and romance I enjoy making, a lovesick one at that, even if I’m able to make something wholesome.

An honorable thought of mine, if rather morbid.

- John Locsin

…

"Let me tell you a little something about love, Dennis. It has a voracious appetite. It eats everything: friendship, family, it kills me how much it eats. But I'll tell you something else, you feed it right and it can be a beautiful thing, and that's what we have. Y'know, when someone believes in you man, really believes in you, you can do anything, any fucking thing in the entire universe and when you believe right back in that someone, then watch out world! 'Cause nobody can stop you then! Nobody! Ever!"

— Arnie, Stephan King’s “Christine”

…

Henry found himself sent to The Wall complex, without a proper lick of why he was sent there. Dimitri didn’t specify the reason, was it because Henry robbed a Bank, was it because he previously escaped prison, stealing the Tunisian Diamond, or taking the Ruby from the Toppat Airship?

It doesn’t matter to dwell on the reason why, because Henry was sent to an even more secure prison complex than last time, and that he would spend a long while in the wall complex.

If there was one thing Henry noticed about his other experiences, is that he never had a proper partner to work with. Henry spent most of his life alone, getting in all sorts of mischief just to scrape by, society failed him after all, and he was standing alone for a long time.

Henry imagined what it would be like to be with someone like minded like he is, to find that “love of your life”. 

To be married, is to be much like an accomplice with another. A relationship between two people who have sworn their futures with each other.

Where betrayal is never forgiven.

Henry was sent off into a cell. No bars, just walls, a reinforced door, with tempered glass that couldn’t be broken easily. 

Besides a small vent… connecting to another person’s cell. Henry inspected it as best he could, he deduced that the vent connecting to the other cell can allow two people to communicate to each other through it if they talk loud enough.

So Henry called out through the vent grate. “Hello?” “I can hear you!” It was a female voice, it sounded fun and charming. “Hey!” Henry greeted the girl who was in a cell close to his.

“Do you want anything?” The girl asked, Henry didn’t know if he disturbed her or not. What Henry did know was that both of them were in close talking distance, meaning they didn’t have to shout just to hear each other.

Henry simply requested “I just want someone to talk to, what’s your name? I’m Henry Stickmin.” The woman responded, “Ellie Rose.” Ellie… Rose… That was a beautiful sounding name for Henry.

“You seem like a nice man, Henry. I haven’t had a proper conversation in a while with anyone.” Ellie told Henry. 

“I would like that very much… how was life before you ended up here?” Henry asked Ellie. “Well, it was mostly me on my own, I don’t even know where my own brother is these days. Wasn’t really the best kid you know? My parents didn’t want me around, so I decided to scrape by however I could.”

“What about you, Henry?” Ellie wanted to hear from Henry’s side as well. “Well, same thing as you I guess… I did so many crazy things before I ended up here… wanna hear it, we might be here for a while?”

Ellie didn’t know what was going on with her… but she wanted to listen to Henry more, because his voice alone sounded oddly comforting, something fun and charming in a way.

So Henry told his story to Ellie, and she listened closely, not letting herself become distracted by anything. Henry, this man, seemed no different from Ellie, and she understood him, both she and Henry began to.

Both of them were surviving against all odds, society didn’t give these two a chance. It wouldn’t be long before Henry and Ellie became the centers of their own worlds.

Neither Henry or Ellie could stop thinking about each other when they needed rest, no one else would be talking to them except each other.

If only both Henry and Ellie would be able to see each other in person… face to face. The two inmates could only imagine how handsome and pretty the other would be, if that was hopefully the case for them.

The conversations between Henry and Ellie got longer over time, spanning hours to even half of the day, who else would they be able to talk to who would even understand them?

Henry was given some paper from Ellie, who knows where she got it. Henry began drawing as many interpretations of Ellie as he could, how she would look like should they finally meet face to face? Henry didn’t skim over a single detail on each drawing, he didn’t coloring, all he needed was a simple pencil to get the job done.

And Ellie? Oh she wouldn’t stop writing all sorts of things about the things she would be doing with Henry if they ever got out together. She imagined their life together, getting married, imagining them dancing under the moonlight so many fantasies to think of.

Henry and Ellie found a way to sneak their breakfast, lunch, and dinner into each other's food they could share together. Henry had a way to turn prison food into something truly exquisite, hoping it would taste as good and feel like eating at a restaurant for a late night date.

It didn’t take long for Wall Staff to begin noticing this behavior, they saw Henry’s and Ellie’s Cells.

Henry had drawings of Ellie strewn all over his cell, he must’ve had an abundant amount of time to do all of this, though one could admit he was an excellent artist in a way. Some drawings were on the ground, others plastered on the walls.

Ellie’s writing, on the other hand, went from pages worth of written stories of her and Henry into all sorts of ramblings, “I am your first and last.”, “Please love me back.”, “I would do anything for you.”, "Marry Me. Marry Me. Marry Me.”, “Love him so much.”

And it just kept going.

So the guards dragged Henry and Ellie out of their cells, separating the two from each other. They resisted as much they could, how could they do this to them?

Would the tale of Romeo and Juliet repeat itself?

The two separated love interests were dragged into another cell away from each other, and they were both beaten by Wall Staff with Baton’s. They remember hearing the words their abusers said, “Stay down you freak.”, “You both don’t deserve each other.”, “See how it feels when you’re both far apart.”

All that Henry and Ellie could do was just keep thinking of each other to ease the pain as best they could, just imagine what they could both do together.

The days and nights that followed were unbearable, all Henry and Ellie wanted was to be with each other again, just their voice was enough to make them feel better.

Eventually, the days leading to its boiling point would show just how powerful love can be.

The two lovers couldn’t take it anymore, they had to see their beloved, one way or another. Ellie began banging on the reinforced door on her cell, which pissed off a guard nearby.

Ellie managed to dent the door, and the guard opened the cell to deal with the prisoner. Ellie seized their opportunity and bashed the guard’s head against the wall, destroying his skull.

The girl ran out and destroyed a panel to the rest of the cell doors, releasing the inmates. Ellie set her eyes on Dimitri… She wanted that man dead for taking Henry from her.

Henry on the other hand had already beaten another guard to death with his fists, he had to see if Ellie was okay, this opportunity was too great to pass up. But first, he had to kill Grigori so he wouldn’t get in his way.

Both lovers ran around the complex looking for each other, killing any Wall Staff member in their way, none of these people were innocent in their eyes.

Both of them made their way to the top of the complex where Dimitri and Grigori were, Henry and Ellie couldn’t let those two escape. 

Both Henry and Ellie found themselves covered in so much blood from their victims, but they didn’t let the gore faze them, they only focused on each other and their revenge.

Then they came face to face with Dimitri and Grigori, both the lovers had rage and madness in their eyes, they wanted their captors dead.

But Henry and Ellie didn’t notice each other until they began their acts against Dimitri and Grigori. More Wall Staff swarmed in towards Henry and Ellie… they didn’t bat an eye as they began killing all of them, and during the bloodfest, 

The star-crossed lovers finally saw each other, face to face amongst the carnage, they saw how they fought and killed, how they dealt with those who stood against them and their love for each other. 

So the moment Henry saw Ellie sever Dimitri’s carotid artery with a piece of glass while he was strangling Grigori, while she was given the touch of red, he knew, right there and then… She was the one.

Ellie watched Henry’s grip on Grigori tighten, and Ellie’s thoughts circulated in her head, “Come on, crush his neck, break it until I hear it crack… Do it for me, Henry!”

A loud crack was heard as Henry choked the life out of Grigori… that was all it took.

Both Henry and Ellie finally got to see each other, finally, face to face, and they were right, they were handsome and beautiful.

Henry spoke to Ellie, running a hand through her hair, “Ellie… I can finally see you, after so long. These days, they were so unbearable without you. I couldn’t imagine what it was like for you when I was gone. Those bastards separated us from each other, I will never allow that to happen ever again. You saw my drawing’s, right? I wanted to see how you looked… I was right, you’re the most gorgeous woman I’ve met, someone who finally understands me. Please, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have taken so long.”

Ellie wanted to tell her piece, she didn’t want Henry to be sad, not right now. So Ellie let it all out to Henry. “You do not kill like any man I have ever seen, Henry. You're more like a force of nature. An earthquake or a tidal wave. A tornado. Watching you kill is like watching Rembrandt paint, or hear Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart conduct his 9th symphony. You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, Henry Stickmin. I think I'm going to cry. Thank you, Frank. Thank you for being you. I can't believe I got to meet you.”

Henry and Ellie saw as a large squad of Wall Guards began surrounding the outside of the room they were both in. They were all heavily armed, and they wouldn’t be able to handle fighting this many people.

The lovers both embraced, hoping that in death they would reunite on the other side, it didn't matter if it was heaven or hell, so long as they went together. Suddenly, an explosion went off, destroying the walls connecting from the room Henry and Ellie were in into the outside of the complex.

Inmates had gotten access to the armories, and they used it to kill the Wall Guard’s trying to get to Henry and Ellie. Why did the prisoners save these two, what made them so special? 

For the convicts, they saw everything Henry and Ellie had done, as if the actions of two people who had an obsessive love for each other influenced most of the inmates. The prisoners all understood something, even those of High Power can fall, the system failed so many people, so what didn’t give them all the right to fight back, to show how much of a threat they can be to those in power.

Henry and Ellie woke up from the explosion, laying on top of the rubble. They heard the shouting of the inmates surrounding them, they were all yelling at them, telling the two lovebirds to get up and stand.

Both Henry and Ellie clung on to each other, to help support each other as they both got up, for both themselves and everyone else. The crowds all cheered, they finally found people to lead them, to guide them in such a dark and ugly world that stomped on all of them.

Ellie wrapped one of her arms over Henry’s back as she held his hand, while Henry held Ellie by her waist. They were their agents of chaos, their world, their new ray of light in madness.

Henry asked Ellie a simple question… “Have you ever danced with the devil under the pale moonlight?” Ellie’s face lit up, and she smiled, “I would love this dance, Honey.”

And both Henry and Ellie danced together, like two lovers in a ball as flames, cheering, and destruction surrounded them. This was how everything should be… It was all perfect, all so brilliantly done with excellence.

The crowd all looked happy as they watched their new leaders dancing, awe struck at how both of them could bring everyone together like this, all united perfectly. All of a sudden, nothing felt crazy anymore. Madness was like gravity, all it took was a little push.

As Ellie wrapped her arms around Henry’s neck as he held her close, they said their vows, Henry said his part, “In health and sickness, I solemnly vow that I will walk this world with you.” And Ellie said her part, “We have nothing left to lose anymore, my love… nothing can stop us anymore.”

A smile across both of Henry’s and Ellie’s faces showed everyone…

How fucking happy they were.

And both the lovers kissed, their vows finally sealed.

Nothing will hurt them anymore.

Story Ends Here

...I don't even know what to say about this one.

Neither do I. Aside from the fact that this is...well...very fitting to the whole "DDLC"/"yandere" thing you mentioned.

Also, you think we're gonna give you slack for being "crazy"? Locsin, we're ALL crazy here. We just use the crazy to our advantage.

This was...well, rather nice for a Darkhold story.

Indeed. Great story, Locsin. We both enjoyed it.

This one in particular was REALLY good. Keep up the good work, Locsin!

[zakmarcin]

Hey Zak, I’ll like your advice if you have time to give. I took my ex back last year April. He told me yesterday he doesn’t want his mind to wander and I know he’s talking about his ex b/c he went back to her earlier next year. He was honest with me about how tired he was waiting for me to move in with him. He said he didn’t cheat on me. Almost been a year and I still haven’t been able to move in with him because I’m talking care of my mom. He took his ex back because I wasn’t able to move near him. I didn’t cry but I was hurt.

However I’ve been taking my stuff to his home in these past few months cause my mom is ready to head back to her homeland.

One day while on FT, he was playing video games and overheard him talking this his brother and he was talking about other how hard it is to find a woman with the whole package such as intelligence and body. That kind of hurt my feelings because I don’t fit the description he really want.

I feel like I should leave but he’s my first bf I had. I never had someone have so much patience with me. I grew up neglected and never had a man take their time with me been all alone these years because I’ve been losing my immediate family. I’m almost 30 years old and have been sad, stressed and overwhelmed for a long time. All I have is my mother left and she’s been going senile for about two years now so in reality she’s not really here, just physically. I have a few best friends but they are mothers now and I don’t want to bother them.

He tells me he loves me and once told me tolerates me and wants to start a family but something about it feels off. I feel like if his ex was not hard to deal with he’ll be her and not me. I’m scared to start over honestly.

I think that if you still have any concerns about his ex and he JUST told you about his mind wandering, you shouldn’t be with him. I’m very big on not tolerating anything ex related.

Also, if someone is gonna push you to move in like that, the bare minimum is they should definitely be 100% sure of you. It’s also a huge red flag that he was that pushy about it and even left for an EX because you were staying to take care of your mother. I understand wanting to advance the relationship and take those steps, but that’s very inconsiderate and telling. That combined with the “tolerate” comment and the conversation you overheard, makes it sound like comfort and attachment more than love.

My overall advice - trust your intuition. I know life has been hard for you, but it will get even harder if you choose the wrong partner, one who is not certain of you. You don’t want a lifetime of those sad, overwhelming feelings, and a partner is a very pivotal decision. It’s also very important to distinguish patience vs. tolerance. How patient is a guy who left you because you couldn’t move in because your mom was sick?

Starting over sucks, it really does, and it’s especially hard for everyone when it’s their first, but it’s important to realize that the concept of the “first” is just something we romanticize. I was completely daunted by the idea of it not working out with my first, and fast forward all these years, I don’t think about her at all, and never in any positive light.

Once I truly let that go, with more maturity/wisdom and no concept of a “first” to cloud my vision, I met someone I feel even stronger about, (which back then I didn’t think was possible) someone that I want to spend my life with. Whether I get to do that or not, it taught me what matters is who becomes the last. And if I can do it, I know you can. 30 is not too late for anything. You deserve someone you don’t have to second guess.

It *could* be worth a conversation with him if you haven’t voiced your concerns in depth to see what he has to say. But overall I think we both may know enough to know what the best thing to do is. I hope this helps. Wishing you blessings and discernment through this time.

[sweetmusingss]

“I think you forget the effect you have on me, baby. I get weak just from you looking at me with those beautiful baby blues. And as for the house, I don’t want to do this unless it’s something that you 100% want. I just find the idea of moving into a home with you so exciting. I never experienced that with a partner before,” I say honestly to you. My ex-husband moved into my house that I had already bought before we met. There was something so exciting about moving into a new house together with the person you loved though and having Noah made it all more exciting. “I just like having projects to work on and you know that I have fun organizing. Plus, Noah and I have a lot of stuff. Packing is going to take a while,” I laugh softly, excited at the idea of it. “I like having something to keep me busy. Sometimes I feel like I don’t have a lot going on.” I loved my life and having the privilege of being a stay-at-home mom but sometimes I felt like it seemed like I did nothing. My mind was always running and it was nice having projects to work on lately to keep me busy. I missed being creative and working on music so instead I was just constantly cleaning and tidying up the house, finding new things to do every few days.

“I’m not 100% set on it, I’m a 1000% set on it, angel. I can’t wait to move into a proper house.” Seb’s eyes widen when you mention you having a lot of stuff, realizing that he had to help you move everything, you having so much stuff. “Oh jeez, baby, it’s gonna take us like a year to move all your stuff! Renee and Alexis are out of commission for helping move, so that just leaves me, Chris and Don... we might need to bring in some guys from the diner.” He chuckles, knowing CHris and Don would be down to help no questions asked. “I know you like having projects and one of your biggest projects will figuring out how 3 men are going to move your entire bath time collection of things and your make up alone. We’re going to need to hire professional movers.”

__

“I have heard enough bad things about LA to keep me away but then again, you’re there,” Frank said, looking back at you when he took a long drag of the cigarette before exhaling slowly. “Yeah, I think I just might. If you don’t end up moving back to Jersey, I might have to visit you just so you don’t forget about me,” he laughed softly. He knew Jamia probably wouldn’t be thrilled about him going to see you but he also knew she probably would not even care. And he had held himself back from a lot of things he wanted to do because of her and he wasn’t going to do that anymore. “I need to be able to see you more. Just texting isn’t enough and you know I’m a shitty texter anyways. I want to see how you’re living out there in L.A. It would be nice to see what your place looks like and all, Miss Hollywood,” he teases you, bumping his hip lightly against yours before handing you back the cigarette.

A few days pass, everyone getting into their tour routines. My routine was spending my entire day on My Chem’s bus before going to do my own set, then showering on my own bus and heading over and getting side stage when their headlining set was starting. I always stood with Mikey’s and Ray’s girlfriends, the three of us getting along, and I couldn’t deny that it was so nice not to have Jamia here like usual. When Frank finished his sets, it was my arms he was running into, not hers. I was the one praising him after every show and admiring him, not her. It was early and I had just finished making the boys some breakfast, handing Frank his plate of vegan pancakes, sitting up on the small counter facing all of them, watching them as they started to eat. “Soooo... I wrote a new song.”

Gerard was mid-bite as I speak, rolling his eyes good naturedly. “I should’ve known, you never just come here and make us all an amazing breakfast for no reason. Manipulative, much?” He smiles, obviously loving to hear my new music and he knew that I used them all as my sounding board for any new music I write. “Did you stow your guitar somewhere, too?”

I throw a blueberry from my plate at him, laughing quietly, shaking my head. “No, my guitars don’t come here since you’re all a liability and get too drunk. I’d worry you’d crush my babies. I just figured I’d use one of Frankie’s.” I look down at him, giving him a sweet smile, swinging my legs that were totally bare, just wearing one of Frank’s old t-shirts and some short shorts, never thinking much about what I wore in front of the guys, figuring they all saw me as a little sister and I didn’t really worry about any of them ogling me... except for the hope that maybe Frank would glance at me and admire me, but he made it quite clear in the past he only has eyes for Jamia, anyways.

[prouddogboi]

Stray dog (Part 1)

To find the most recent chapters, please go to @doggoboigaugau 's masterlist

Pairings: Ghost x Soap x Male Reader

Summary: Male Reader is traumatized and forcefully refuses affection from Ghost and Soap even in his sleep.

Word count: 1852

Warnings: It's my first time posting my writing on Tumblr. There are so few CODxM!Reader fics I just want to contribute lmao TToTT. The warning is it can be shit because I'm new.

It was a successful mission. A tough one, yes, many soldiers got serious injuries and had to spend days in the hospital, but still, the mission was accomplished with minimal loss. The people at the base decided to throw a party at a well-known bar in the area. As usual, you stayed close to your team, until they left you all alone again for whatever they were up to: Ghost and Soap went into the dark corridor doing ‘secret’ business except for the fact that everyone knew what that business was; Price meeting up with the Captains of other teams, talking about the ‘kids’ in their care like the good ol’ tired dads and moms they all were; Gaz hitting up on some pretty guy or girl; and Roach just immersing himself in the music on the dance floor. 

“The usual shot?” The bartender smiled at you. He was an ordinary-looking guy, not too tall, not too short, but he was always nice to you.

“Yeah.” You replied, eyes looking down at the empty glass in your scarred hand. Your usual shot was one of the heaviest types served at this bar, you found its bitter, stinging taste and the dizziness it brought about worked wonders for you, helping to repress the strong emotions that always came up to the surface to trouble you whenever you were off the field, whenever you were not having to fight between life and death. Free time and a mind that was offered the opportunity to relax were not something you felt grateful for. Instead, you loved being constantly stimulated when being in battles, since it left your mind no time to overthink unnecessary things other than trying to keep yourselves and your teammates alive.

“A successful mission, huh? Everyone is enjoying themselves a lot tonight.” The bartender said, clearly trying to keep talking to you as he was preparing your drink.

“It was.”

“Did you get injured?” 

“Just some scratches, nothing serious.”

“You seem to do your job very well.”

You did. You were a good soldier. An excellent one even. You were showered with praise from the Captain, the teammates, the higher-ups… just anyone after almost every mission. Even Ghost himself had to admit that you were a good one. However, you didn’t know for sure what made you excel while most others didn’t. Maybe it was because every mission you paid no mind as to whether you would be alive or not. It was true that everyone in this line of work had to come to terms with the notion of death upon themselves, no one could be sure how many days they got left on this planet doing this kind of job, but you were still different. You weren’t actively trying to get yourselves in situations that would get you killed, because it often meant a great threat to your teammates too, but you were not one that would hold on to life that much. You were always ready to sacrifice.

“I notice that you’re always alone. Well, the others do join you, but after a while, they leave and you’re still here.” The bartender passed you the shot.

“They have things to do.”

“Why don’t you? Getting out there and having some fun.”

Fun? It did not sound fitting to who you were. “Thanks for the suggestion, but I prefer it this way.”

“By the way, can I ask for a guy’s number? The one with the mohawk.”

“You mean Soap?” You left out a soft chuckle, “Give up, mate. He already has a partner. A scary one.” 

“Who?”

“The fuckin’ huge one with the skull mask. I’m sure you know well who he is and how scary he is.”

“What? That guy? I’ve always thought he’s into you though.”

This time you laughed out loud. The thought of someone interested in you was just so ridiculous, it felt surreal and impossible, “Ain’t no way, why would you think that?”

“He always looks at you with those piercing eyes, as if he will eat you up in no time.”

“Probably it’s because the Soap guy is always leaning over me. He’s so mad that I dare to get that near to his precious partner that he just wants to end my life right here.” You drank up the whole glass in one breath, then smashed the now empty glass on the bar, resulting in a huge ‘thump’ sound, mainly due to the fact that it was your fist that came into contact with the wooden material. It sent a burning feeling to your skin and fresh, but it was nothing compared to the physical pain you had to endure in battles or the mental one off field, when your mind was free to drift away. 

“Could be. But I still think he is into you.” The bartender shrugged, knowing you so well that he went ahead to prepare another shot for you. Nights like this often led to you drinking non-stop until you were so drunk that you’d pass out, and that masked guy was the one who carried you back. That was another reason besides the intense glare that made him convinced that the guy was attracted to you. Well, the hot man with the mohawk was always there too, but he usually waited in distance and smiled at how the masked guy having trouble carrying you as you thrashed around in his arms, clearly too drunk to know that he was just helping you. But the bartender only thought that the mohawk and the masked guy were close friends. Now that you mentioned it, it was indeed possible that they were in love with each other. 

Wouldn’t that make a love triangle though? The bartender threw a glance at you, studying you with amusement. Everyone loved some drama in their mundane lives. You were a handsome boy with sharp facial features, those damn bright eyes that lit up the whole place when you genuinely smiled, and all those strong muscles. He would’ve asked for your number instead if that scary big masked man wasn’t into you that much.

A few hours passed and the party came to its near end. All those smiling and laughing soldiers slowly hopped on the vehicles, making their way back to the base, clearly not wanting to wake up a mess the day after. They still had training as usual after all. One didn’t seem to care though. You collapsed on the bar, your handsome face grew red with how drunk you were and how much alcohol your body had absorbed. Ghost and Soap assured Price that they would bring you back safe before the tired dad of your Task Force got in the car with Gaz and Roach. They didn’t usually drink too much when they were off base, but you were quite the opposite. The team had no idea why you would pour so much alcohol into your mouth and stomach on these occasions, it was like you were grieving over something rather than celebrating the good news of a successful mission. Everyone in this line of work had their own past and troubles, but there was indeed something different in your troubles as they never felt that you were comfortable to open up. Soap even joked a lot about how much harder it was to get closer to you than Ghost. It was true that you were always smiling, chatting, and gossiping with him and Gaz and Roach over stupid things, but there was this invisible wall that you had built around your heart, unwilling to let anyone in. 

Ghost and Soap got to the bar where you were lying. 

“Come to get him?” The bartender was cleaning all the glasses that you and some other regulars used.

Ghost looked at you as your eyes were tightly shut, clearly not happy with your current condition, “Maybe next time don’t let him drink too much.”

The bartender raised his hands, “C’mon, I’m just serving my customers. He appears to need those shots to handle whatever emotions he’s having.”

Ghost and Soap turned their head to look at each other for a few seconds before Ghost stepped up and got you off the bar. You were too drunk to know anything, but surprisingly tonight you were very silent and cooperated well with your Lieutenant. 

“Let’s take you back to your room, huh?” Ghost was content with this sudden change and Soap just casually used his strong hand to rub your neatly cut hair. 

As Soap parked the car in the base's park, Ghost threw one of your arms over his shoulder and carried you off the vehicle. However, your tightly shut eyes suddenly opened, they widened as you turned your head left and right to make sense of your surroundings. 

“You’re up early.” Soap said jokingly.

“He’s too drunk to understand your stupid sarcasm, Soap.” Ghost scoffed. 

However, it took both men aback when they heard you sobbing. Soap was quick to cup your face with his palms, “Baby, what’s wrong?”

You shook your head, sobbing almost uncontrollably, trying to get your face out of his grip. One of Ghost’s arms went to your waist in an attempt to hold you in place and calm you down, but you started to act the usual way when you were drunk: thrashing around hysterically, as if you were striving so hard to escape from something inescapable. 

“Let go of me!” You screamed.

“Y/n, calm down, calm down! It’s us! Ghost and Soap!” Soap tried to talk some sense into the heavily drunk you.

“Stay away from me!” You didn’t seem to listen. Feeling Ghost’s grip was still firm around your body, you got more and more violent. Screaming and kicking, you definitely hurt him in the process as you finally succeeded in getting away. You stumbled a few steps on the cold cement ground before you collapsed on it due to the perfect dizziness that you hoped the shots at the bar would gift you. You curled into a ball, trembling violently yet not from how cold the ground was. Shuddering sobs still escaped your lips, and your eyes were tightly shut again. Price and Gaz hurriedly ran to where you three were, their eyes filled with worry given how loud and heartfelt your screams were (Roach didn’t come with them because he also drank too much). The two men saw Ghost and Soap standing beside you, their arms were hanging in the air as if they were holding on to something, while you were there, laying on the ground sobbing and mumbling unintelligible words. 

Luckily you quickly fell asleep again, still sobbing but unconscious enough for the men to carry you back to your room. They tucked you nicely into your bed, watching over your now peaceful sleeping face. Soap wiped the tears left on your cheeks with his hand, his mind questioning the reasons why you reacted so fiercely to them taking care of you earlier. When you finally stopped sobbing, they carefully left your room. There were things to be discussed, but they could wait.

to be continued bc I have class tmr and I need to sleep :D

[sluttyhollow]

Garden

Ken “Draken” Ryuguji

Can you remind me of my gravity? Ground me when I'm tumbling, spiraling, plummeting down to Earth You keep me down to Earth

Warnings: fluffy smut, feelings, reader has anxiety, talks of toxic relationships, weed smoking, past Draken and Emma, oral sex (f receiving), reader gets pick up, reader has fem anatomy no pronouns, use of honey/love dubcon (?) just in case because they were smoking, consent implied but not explicitly given, let me know if I missed anything

Notes: this is part of @sirenh4ll’s sza collab for Garden! You don’t have to listen to the song while reading but it does set the mood. I had a lot of fun writing this. As always, reader is implied as black! No descriptors used though so feel free to read.

You were never one for fairy tail romance or relationships. Dealing with other people was never easy for you. Riddled with a brain that didn’t produce enough serotonin and an amygdala that reacted so often your body was always in a constant state of restlessness you usually kept to your self. So when you did find people that you could connect with you attached yourself to them and stayed with them as long as they were supposed to remain in your life. This lead to a series of toxic friendships and partners that sucked every ounce of who you were from you until you were nothing more than a shell of your former self. Which is how you ended up here. After your last relationship ended and you graduated you packed up your things and accepted a job that allowed you to move out of your home country to Japan giving you time and space to start over.

Everything wasn’t perfect, no. You still struggled with things, and had your days where you sat in your bed and cried for hours, but it was better than it was. You were growing, learning how to be yourself without repressing yourself or fear. Plus, Being a foreigner people tended to avoid you anyways making it easy for you to matriculate through the streets, to work, and back home without hassle. Everything was going great until you met him. Not that he made things worse, no he undoubtedly made things better, easier, you felt comfortable and that’s why you were scared.

Ken Ryuguji, or Draken, as he insisted you call him the first time you all met on the stairs of your shared apartment building, he lived a few doors down. You two became quick friends as he insisted on showing you around considering you were all alone. As time progressed you two spent hours hanging around each others houses, spending nights out with each other until the sun started peaking above the horizon. You two shared bits and pieces of your lives before your paths converged, never fully allowing the other in. You weren’t eager to make the same mistakes you’d made again, unwilling to bare yourself to him completely just so he wouldn’t disappear like everyone before. Unbenounst to you draken fely the same.

Currently the two of you sat on the floor of your living room passing a lit joint between the two of you. Draken propped up on the floor against the couch right beside your legs that were dangling over the edge. As usuall, in times like these both of you let your guard down just enough to let your mouths move freely with each other.

“You know Kenny, I’m glad I met you. I was fucked up when I got here, felt like I just floating along and then boom you’ve been keeping me grounded ever since” the words just sort of slipped out with an airy giggle at the end.

Smoking always made your tongue a little looser. He had been your saving grace, always coming through when you needed him, even if you never said you did. The man had a sixth sense, felt your turbulence and acted as the pilot to guide you through it. He’d been there to give you sound advice, called you on your bullshit, encouraged you when you needed and pushed against you when he knew you needed him to. Made you stand on your own but was always close enough to catch you. Even let you hang out with his friends and make them your own.

“I don’t think you’d say that if you knew everything about me honey”

“I don’t think you’d think that way if you knew everything about me”

“‘s nothing like my pas- ”

“I like you just how you are now Kenny, that stuff doesn’t matter to me”

“And I’ve stuck beside you this long haven’t I”

Those two encrypted confessions leading your next actions, making them feel like they weren’t your own. Your body instinctually moving from the seat of the couch to rest on his, arms wrapping around his neck and pulling your mouth to meet his, which he easily reciprocated.

He was unhurriedly savoring the way his lips fit against yours, the way your tongues were introducing themselves to each other, hands coming to clasp behind your back dragging you just that much closer to him. He’d be lying if he said he hasn’t been thinking about this, not initially but days spent with you had left him in need of making his thoughts tangible. After his messy breakup with Emma, he didn’t think he’d be willing to trust another person to be in his life in that way again. But with you it was easy, you didn’t want anything from him which made it so easy for him to give you everything that he saw you needed and deserved. He wanted to pick up your pieces, see the rest of what you hid within your little garden, and help you make it grow.

Pulling himself away from you just enough to push a few words through the space “ready to be mine ‘s forever or nothing” instead of words you pushed your mouth back against his in response. Bending his legs and pushing himself up to stand still holding you in his arms he walked the path down to your room in the back of the apartment. Lips never leaving yours all the way, before flopping you onto the bed causing you to giggle. Without wasting much time, he looped his fingers into the band of the sweats you had been wearing and pulled them down your legs, grabbing your underwear in the process. Reaching up to remove your shirt and toss it over your head before reaching to take his own off as well.

His hands, rough from years of mechanic work, roamed across your body before spreading your legs apart. He fixed you with a look, giving you another chance to back out which you declined with the slight incline of your head, before dipping his head and attaching himself onto your arousal. A deep moan left your mouth, he was everywhere. Hands still exploring your body, tongue writing love notes across your clit before taking exploratory licks into your hole, his eyes locked on the expressions flittering across your face. It was too much, his ministrations leading you into your first orgasm faster than anyone, yourself included, had ever done before. Ensuring he drank everything you gave him he placed a small kiss on your clit before making his way back up your body to meet your lips again.

“pants off now” a whine of words, more than anything but unwilling to make you wait any longer he quickly disregards his pants and underwear in one motion leaving him exposed to you. He was pretty. Sized perfectly for his tall and lean frame, veins leading their way towards a perfectly pink tip. Grabbing your legs, looping his hands around your knees pushing them up to meet the sides of your chest and lining himself up with your now throughly dripping hole he slides himself in to the hilt not giving you much time to adjust to him as synchronized moans rack through both of your bodies.

“S-so good for me baby, jus fits in you so perfect” his hips start moving, just barely enough to be a noticeable amount of friction but also just enough to have constant stimulation hitting that one little spot inside of you. “Feels soo good hugging my dick so tight love” constant streams of his praises falling into your ears causing your second orgasm to rip it’s way through you without warning. The constrictive pulsing of your walls around him sending him over the edge just after you. Draining every drop of himself into you before pulling out to watch it drip out and down towards the sheets. Using his tongue to capture the fallen droplets and kissing your sensitive clit he finally dropped you legs and laid beside you.

Arms wrapping around your body to pull you into him, eyes meeting yours filled with a deep affection you were sure you missed before “you know I love you right” looking in his eyes you were sure you believed him, how could you not “when you say it like that, I don’t think I could believe anything else” returning his embrace with a small “I love you too” mumbled into the planes of his chest.

[clairecrive]

hi!!! can I ask for darkling smut after he and the reader get in an argument? like it starts out angry but by the end they're super passionate and cuddly? thank you and congrats on so many followers!!

A/n: you ask and you shall receive, hun! I love writing this so so much. I hope you'll like to read it too. Thanks for requesting and for your words xx This is also for this anon.

Warnings: angst, smut, fluff at the end

Word count: 2.9 K

Tags: @blackst0nes7077, @thefictionalgemini, @louweasleymalfoy @jupiterandbutterflies , @for-bebbanburg, @tarkanelima-blog, genre), @pansysgirlfriend, @acciorudolphx, @kaqua , @hannaxmaria, @vintagebitc, @deardiarystuff (if you want you can add yourself to my taglist by filling this form)

SHADOW AND BONE MASTERLIST

“You will not believe what-” y/n had the habit of not knocking before entering his room. The general had been more than annoyed with her initially, but she insisted that it was a way for him to distinguish her from everyone else.

Hear the door open? You don’t have to guess who it is, you’ll know it’s me, she used to tell him.

Now, however, she was wishing she didn’t have that habit in the first place. Stumbling into a room, your partner’s room, to find him standing way too close to another girl, wasn’t on her list for tonight. Maybe a warning would have been nice but at the same time, if she had knocked she wouldn’t have found them this way.

Her initial enthusiasm at the prospect of sharing this gossip with him had suddenly vanished. The smile on her face turned into a frown as Alina cleared her voice and took a step away from the general for decency’s sakes. Too late, y/n wanted to tell her.

It was painfully clear what she had interrupted. She willed her face to set into an emotionless expression but she couldn’t help a glance in Aleksander direction. Arms behind him, he looked nothing but proper and collected. But y/n knew him, probably better than anyone else in this world, and had learnt how to read his body. His jaw was clenched which meant that he wasn’t as calm as he wanted to appear.

Good, y/n thought, let him drown in guilt and misery.

Clearing her voice, she realized she had been standing there without saying anything for too long.

“I’m so sorry, General, I didn’t know you were busy. I should have knocked,” she excused herself without looking at them. “I’ll leave you to it.” With a slight nod, she added before hightailing out of the room.

She could feel Alina’s questioning gaze on her back as she closed the door behind her. There were already rumours going around about her supposed relationship with the General. No one knew for certain, neither y/n nor Kirigan had ever bothered confirming or denying them. Now though, she knew that words of this little encounter would spread, further cementing the already existing gossip.

Oh well, she thought as she walked to her room, by the looks of it there wasn’t going to be a relationship to gossip about anymore.

Her bedroom had lost every sense of familiarity and comfort a private space like this should have. She hardly ever slept in it anymore. Not since she and the general had become a thing. She only went there to change and so slipping into the bed felt weird and anonymous. As if she was in someone else’s bed and not hers.

Her sleep was doomed to be restless, she knew. However, tomorrow’s busy schedule prompted her to at least try and get some sleep. Even if it only was a couple of hours. Shuffling to change position she tried to keep Aleksander out of her mind.

An unachievable task, she was aware but she tried nonetheless. Things between them had been tense ever since he had come back to the Little Palace with her. y/n knew of his plans. She knew why he needed to do certain things and how Alina was involved. That didn’t mean she was fine with it though.

Not only did it bother her the fact that he was stripping the girl of her will and powers eventually but it also bothered her that he had chosen to get to her by manipulating her feelings. They had had countless fights because of this but nothing ever came out of it. A centuries-long existence meant that he was stubborn beyond belief and there was no way of making him change his mind once it was set on something.

After what she had witnessed today though, y/n wondered if the jokes were on him and he did end up feeling something genuine for Alina. Y/n herself had met her and spoke with her a couple of times and she had to admit begrudgingly that she wasn’t that bad.

Lost in her thoughts, y/n was snapped out of it by a loud knock at her door. As soon as she started to wonder who could be bothering her at this hour, the door opened and she stopped guessing.

Of course, it was him.

“I’m in no mood to talk to you, Aleksander. Please go.” She spoke, not bothering to turn towards where she knew he was standing. Y/n knew that while she couldn’t see him in the dark this wasn’t true for him. Shadows didn’t hinder his view like they did everyone else, they were an extension of him.

He didn’t speak but she also didn’t hear him walking away. She let out a sigh and that was the only way she was willing to acknowledge him. He wanted to stand in the shadow and stare like a creep? Fine, two could play this game.

Set on ignoring him, she stubbornly stared ahead of her. She was very aware of his eyes on her, stinging like needles. If sleep was arduous to achieve before now it was impossible. In any case, she closed her eyes and pretended to be at least. He wouldn’t know the difference and would leave her alone at some point.

But of course, she knew him well enough by now and he wasn’t as easily deterred. She didn’t know how much time passed but her eyes flew open as she felt her bed dip. Her breath hitched and she laid on full alert.

Then she felt the shadow of his touch on her neck and knew that he was close. Way too close that he should be. He was probably propped on his arm as she felt her pillow dip too.

“We don’t have to talk if you don’t want to.” He whispered close to her ears, his lips suggestively tracing her earlobe.

Despite the chills that his touch would usually send to her body, y/n stifled a treacherous gasp. Instead, her body stiffened and she almost pushed him away but she wasn’t sure that touching him wouldn’t backfire.

“If you think I’d let you lay a finger on me after you touched her, you’re sorely mistaken.”

“Who says I did?”

“Please, stick to manipulating one girl, okay? Move. away.”

He didn’t reply but the hand that was on her neck moved to her shoulder and pushed back so that she was laying on her back and facing him. Well, the darkness was too thick for her to actually see his face but she could feel his breath.

“Do not push me away.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.” Y/n bite back.

“You’re well aware of my plans, don’t act so betrayed now.”

“Well, maybe I’m tired of being a pawn in your schemes.”

“A pawn isn’t aware of its role nor of the whole plan.”

“Being smart with me won’t help, Aleksander. You want Alina? Fine, go get her. But leave me out of this.” Pulling her face free of his grip, she turned on her side. The shadows around him had dissipated a bit, allowing you to glimpse at his face.

“You cannot do this, y/n.” he growled, pushing her on her back again, “you said you were in this. You said you wanted me, that you were going to be by my side always. You can’t just change your mind. You can’t.” His voice was strangled with emotion almost breaking on some words.

Y/n had never heard his voice so filled with sorrow. Because that’s what he must be feeling. She thought that he was also feeling betrayed by her but then she realized-- no, he was afraid. Afraid of losing her.

He knew what he did and he also was aware that y/n was not one to mess with. She was just as stubborn as he was and just as prideful. What she had seen had hurt her and it was only what she felt for him that prevented him from being mindlessly dismissed and removed from her life. She had not resisted him more forcefully because she cared, because the wound was still french and that meant that there was still a tiny hope left.

“That was before you fell for another woman. I can’t stand by and watch you be with her. You can’t ask that of me.” She whispered, meeting his eyes. No matter how much she loved him, that was simply something she was not willing to put herself through.

“That’s not what I’m asking. That’s not what's happening.” He pledged. Y/n didn’t know if it was a trick of the moonlight seeping in from her window but she saw his eyes well with unshed tears.

“Isn’t it?”

“It isn’t.” He insisted, his hand on your jaw holding it closer. “Alina is a pawn, Alina doesn’t know what is going to happen, she doesn’t know me.” Heaving a sigh, Aleksander held her face, his thumb caressing her cheek.

“There is no one on this earth that has ever seen me more clearly than you do, solnishko. I know what you saw, I know what it looked like because that was intentional. But I trust you to know the difference between what it’s really happening and what it looks like because they’re not the same.” His eyes were alive with an intensity y/n had only seen a few times before. He was ancient and he was skilled at manipulation amongst other things. She always tried to keep that in mind but now, looking at him, she couldn’t help but feel like he was being genuine.

Why would he want me near? There wasn’t an ulterior motive for wanting her by her side. Yes, she was the only one who knew about his plans but that wasn’t it. If it was, he would have simply killed her. Took less time than this. Also, y/n knew that the power was in her hands. If she said no, that she couldn’t do this anymore, she was sure that Aleksander would let her go.

“But the way you were looking at her, Aleks, I just-” a lump formed in her throat as she recalled the look on his face, “you’re spending more and more time with her and I can’t help but fear that- I mean she’s literally the embodiment of sunshine.”

“You’ve never seen the way I look at you, then.” Thumb trailing over her lower lip now, he gave her a weak smile. “I swear that there’s no one dearer to me than you.”

“I’m not sure I can’t stand the idea of you kissing and touching her, Aleksander, I’m sorry.” Y/n insisted as well because she knew him and she knew that the way she worded things was crucial.

“That won’t happen then.” He assured but she was still not fully convinced.

“I promise it won’t come to that.” So Aleks rephrased. It was better but still not good enough. But they could work on that surely.

“It seems to me though, that I have not done a good job at showing you what you meant to me. I need to reinforce it, don’t you think?” He proposed, using the hand on her face to pull her closer to him.

“I agree.” y/n mumbled on his lips before they smashed together. She didn’t wait for him to initiate the kiss. She thought she had lost him tonight and had already been trying to plan her life without him. She wasn’t willing to waste any more time. She was going to show everyone that he was hers and only hers so as not to leave any more doubts around them. Fuck gossip.

Propping herself on her elbow she used it as leverage to reach up to meet him. The hand he had on her face moved backwards to hold her head while her hand did the same in his hair. Both of them pulled the other impossible close, not willing to leave the smallest of spaces between them.

Sitting up, y/n used her other hand to first the lapel of his kefta. She quickly unfasted the buttons to get rid of it before she pushed him on his back.

“She thinks she has a chance, uh.” She taunted as she straddled his waist, roughly gathering her sleeping gown around her waist while his hands instantly shot up to rest on her hips.

“She thinks she’ll be as lucky as seeing you like this?” she continued, her hands caressing his naked chest, “that she’ll have the chance of touching you? kissing you?” she leaned down, one hand at the nape of his head to make him meet her halfway. It wasn’t a long kiss, she needed to make a point after all. Pulling away, she bit his lower lip earning a moan from him.

“To feel you like this?” she whispered in his mouth as her hips wiggled over his clothed member. His hands tightened his hold on her hips, pushing her down on it increasing the pressure.

“She’s delusional,” Aleks gasped as her mouth trailed kisses along his jaw and neck where it nipped and sucked.

“Mh,” y/n agreed, “let’s make sure she knows.” She promised before her mouth went back to sucking a few hickeys on his neck. Aleks only moaned and gave her more space to work on. His hands trailed up from her waist, cupping her breasts before playing with her nipples.

As her mouth lowered on his collarbone, Aleks decided that enough was enough. His hands roughly gripped the end of her gown before hastily pulling it up and off her body. One arm snaked over her waist pulling her flush against him as he sat up.

“Enough teasing,” he warned as the hand that wasn’t on her quickly discarded his undergarments.

“As you wish, moy sovregni,” she whispered sultrily on his lips knowing fully what effect those words had on him. Aleksander growled on her mouth, his hands kneading her ass cheeks as he gently lowered her on him.

Gasping as she felt every inch of him enter her, y/n gripped his shoulders as she started to move. Aleks’ hands guided her as she set a steady pace.

“She’s never going to feel your hands on her body,” she breathed as Aleks’ hips snapped up, setting a rougher pace.

“You’re mine.” She growled possessively on his lips as her hips met his.

“I’m yours, y/n. Just as you’re mine.” His tone matched hers. He sealed his promise with a bruising kiss. The trusting was becoming more and more frantic and Aleks’ could feel y/n clench around him.

With no previous warning, he lowered his hands from her ass to her thighs so that he could hold her while he changed their position. Guiding her legs to wrap around his waist, Aleksander leaned on his knees while he pushed her upper body down with his chest. Y/n gasped on his lips not knowing if it was for the movement, for the change of position that meant that he was now able to reach deeper than before or because she could feel her orgasm approaching.

Whatever the reason may be, Aleks swallowed her gasp as his lips refused to leave hers. Snapping his hips, he moved his hands from her legs. One went to stimulate her clit while the other choked her lightly. He knew that this combo would prove to send her over the edge. Not long after, as a matter of fact, he felt y/n’s nails on his shoulders as well as her walls tightening around him. He was not behind.

While y/n whimpered his name over and over as her orgasm hit her, Aleksander’s thrusts began to falter. With one deep thrust, he emptied inside her, obscene sounds leaving his mouth.

He leaned over y/n’s body, both of their breaths heavy, they basked in the afterglow. Aleks’ head rested over her chest, comforted by her steady heartbeat while y/n’s hands trailed over his back.

Once their breath had levelled and they could regain control over their limbs, Aleks propped himself over his elbow, his nose nuzzling y/n’s making her giggle at the soft touch. She loved these rare moments of softness and intimacy between them. If she could, she’d never let them end.

“I promise you’ll never have to doubt me again.”

“If you keep this up, it’d be impossible for me to.” She chuckled, referring to her limp body. She couldn’t trust her body to move. Sex with Aleksander always had this effect on her.

“Good to know I can still satisfy you.” He smirked as he leaned down for a small kiss. Giggling on his lips, y/n pulled him close, making him rest his weight on her rather than his elbow.

“I’m thoroughly sated, my love. You have nothing to worry about in that department.” Aleks couldn’t see her but could feel the smirk on her lips. Intertwining their legs, he got more comfortable on her. Her arms held him in a tight embrace.

“You’ll do well to remember it, dearest.” His voice came out muffled since his face rested between her breasts but y/n got what he meant anyway. Laughing at the idea that she could ever need anyone else, y/n held him closer to her chest. The embrace her form of a promise to him.

She had everything she’d ever need right here in her arms.

[miekasa]

M-mie could we get some athlete boyfriend eren hcs too if you don’t mind, please and thank you😩

He is: my boyfriend, and I love him dearly. Perfect amount of himbo and athlete without being a jock, everybody give it up for Eren for being my dream boy <3

Eren plays sports year round, with the exception of maybe one or two winter seasons, just because his school/work/home life was too busy for athletics at those times. Otherwise, he’s always go something to practice for: soccer in the fall, hockey in the winter, and his choice of baseball or basketball in the spring.

He’s not a varsity athlete; that is, he’s not “committed” to any one team, so he’s not tied to playing one sport every year, nor are his academics linked to his athletics, or vice versa. He’s just a pretty athletic guy, and he’s got a lot of energy, and he enjoys sports, so naturally he plays whenever he can.

As it turns out, it does help him with his academics. Knowing he’s got practice the majority of the week forces Eren into building a schedule that prioritizes both schoolwork and sports so he can enjoy them equally. It teaches him to be independent in a way that he wasn’t expecting, but he’s come to really love.

And because he loves it, he doesn’t mind working hard for it. Liking the way he’s set it up for himself encourages him to do his best in both areas. It’s really just good for him all around: a good outlet fo his energy, a good way to spend his time, a good way to keep his grades in check, and a good way to keep himself comfortably happy and busy.

His appetite is insatiable, so it’s only dramatized when playing sports. He takes the all you can eat in all you can eat sushi a little too seriously.

The thing is… he’s a shit cook, too, so it’s not like he’s meal prepping to make sure he’s satisfying his appetite. He just buys a shit ton of food whenever he’s hungry. He’s always asking you if you wanna grab food, and part of it is to ensure that you’re eating—not as much as him, but eating nonetheless—but part of it is that he just likes sharing meals with someone.

He also doesn’t like to eat alone, so even if you only have your ten California rolls to his forty six spicy tuna rolls, that’s fine; he just wants the company.

That’s also why even if you say you’re not hungry, he’ll drag you out to eat with him anyway. And you’ll probably get fed some of his food even if you don’t order anything and insist that you’re not hungry because, “It’s really good, baby, just try it—just one bite, it’s okay I’ve got plenty left!”

He usually keeps a few granola bars and chips and other snacks of his liking on him. But because of Eren’s nature, he keeps them on you, too: in your car, in your backpack, in your apartment/dorm. You’ll meet him after class and he’ll kinda just start walking behind you, and you realize he’s opening your backpack, and you don’t even have time to question him before he’s pulling a bar out of the smallest pocket with a smile and munching on it.

Sometimes you come home and see his little protein shakes in your fridge. You definitely didn’t put them there, but you don’t move them, either. When you stock up on more when they’re running low, Eren contemplates marrying you.

If it’s been a hard week of practice or school, he tends to get sleepy when studying (usually when studying for his least favorite class, no coincidence there). He’ll close his laptop, put his hood up, and scooch his chair closer to yours before leaning his head on your shoulder.

He gets increasingly clingier the longer he naps; hand wrapping around your waist, nose poking at your neck. He’s not so subtly trying to hint that he wants you to quit studying and take him home to cuddle instead. If you don’t get the message, expect him to shut your laptop for you.

When you protest, Eren just looks at you with pouty lips and tired eyes, “Chemistry sucks anyway. Wanna nap, and also wanted you to do that thing with your hands when you massage my back for me.” (He then promptly falls asleep mid-massage on your bed).

He’s actually got a waiver to see a physical massage therapist because of how frequently he’s exercising. On occasion, he goes, but he claims he likes your massages much better. Also because he’s hesitant about a stranger touching him and once he moaned when the guy was working on his back and Eren swears it was one of the most embarrassing moments of his life.

He doesn’t get upset if you can’t make it to every game, but he does like it when you show up. Gets all cheesy and cocky with his arm around your shoulder, going on about how, “You’re my good luck charm, baby. I play better when you’re watching, you know?”

He has so much team clothing, from sweats to hoodies to t-shirts to socks. All he asks is that you wear something on game days, even if you can’t be there to support him while he’s playing. And that you keep one or two things for yourself anyway. He’ll put them in your closet for your if you don’t take them yourself <2

Because seeing you in his hoodie is always great, but his team hoodies are extra special, because they’ve got his name and his number on them. Whenever you’re wearing one, he trails just a half step behind you so he can see JAEGER printed on your back while you walk. Something about you wearing his last name around is… enticing, to say the least.

Even if it’s not the clothes branded with his name, Eren’s got a thing for you in sweats and/or workout clothes, so he’ll toss them at you whenever you sleep over. He’s always handsy, even if you’re just wearing an Under Armour shirt with the school’s logo on it; the material of it, and knowing that it’s his just makes him want to keep his hands on you.

Truthfully, he doesn’t workout all that much outside of practice. Occasionally, he’ll go to the gym with some of his teammates if they need a buddy, or go himself to stretch or take one of the free classes, but he doesn’t have a strict schedule for it. If you go to the gym, he’ll follow you if you ask, tho.

Turns out something that he does like is yoga. He’s not particularly flexible lmfao, but the stretching helps with muscle pain and tension, and he kinda finds the whole atmosphere of it relaxing. He’s still not so great at the meditation part of it, but he’s getting there.

(Actually, it’s pretty cute because on Tuesday and Thursdays, the yoga classes at the gym on campus are open-level and beginner friendly. That’s when the majority of the athletes show up, and you see people like Eren, Jean and Connie holding tree pose in the back room).

This, of course, makes him think that couples yoga is a great idea. Let’s just say, you’re lucky that Eren is strong enough to catch you and has sharp reflexes, because he’s certainly not the most balanced partner for this activity.

Game days are fun for him, and usually even if his team loses, he’s still so pumped up on adrenaline that he’s pretty happy. He only gets moody if he thinks the other team is playing dirty, or the refs are unfair, or he’s just been in a bad mood because of something that happened in his personal life; sports are an outlet for him, not his drive in life, so losing a game doesn’t take a huge toll on him.

Usually, even if he is upset about something personal, he’s able to funnel it into his game play. Small things used to make his whole sportsmanship sour, but overtime, he’s really gotten better at using his energy to fuel the right things. However, one thing that makes him foul (emotionally and literally; as in he might foul out of a game), is if he’s been fighting with you.

Sometimes it works in his favor—using the game as outlet, like usual—but it goes south pretty quickly. Because instead of using his aggression in a productive way, he gets distracted and easily pissed off, and it’s no good for anybody, especially himself. Because if he fouls out, or the coach takes him out for doing too much, then he can’t play; and if he can’t play then all that pent up frustration has no where to go; and then he’s forced to just sit with himself and his thoughts, but usually he starts deflecting and telling everyone else to piss off. Truly a no good, very bad box he’s put himself in.

You guys don’t fight that often, and it’s rare that it drags out for an extended amount of time when you do; but as with any relationship, it can happen. And when it does happen, if Armin doesn’t get to you first, expect one of Eren’s teammates to come groveling at your feet.

Or, rather, two. Because when you and Eren were fighting for over two weeks about god knows what at this point, it was Connie and Jean who ambushed you in the library. Jean had some pride to keep, but Connie was practically begging you to make up with Eren: “Look, I know he’s probably the one who said or did something to piss you off, and I’m not saying you gotta forgive him, but please just talk to him. I can’t run anymore extra laps because of him, and it’s gonna be so embarrassing if we lose to a C-list team on Friday because Eren’s funking up everyone’s attitude. PLEASE!”

Jean is more interested in the tea between you guys, but he also wants Eren to go back to being his normal hotheaded self, and not his current moody self. “He’s been playing like a bitch baby all week, and I’m gonna knock his skull in if he doesn’t fucking get his act together,” Jean rolls his eyes, “So just show up on Friday, alright? Do it for me and Connie, at least.”

When Eren does see you in the crowd at the game, it’s not a Troy and Gabriella moment, but when he sees you he feels so much relief that he’s physically calmer and way more mentally relaxed—because at this point Eren wasn’t even mad, he was just scared you might break up with him, and that fear brought out the worst in him. Seeing you in the stands, even if you didn’t wanna speak to him, was reassurance that you still gave a damn about him, and that was motivation enough.

He rushes to you after the game, wanting to make sure you don’t get swept away or leave with your friends. He’s smiling and so happy to finally see you that he almost forgets that you’re mad with him; hugging you and grinning ear to ear. When the reality kicks in, he kinda steps back at bit and rubs at his neck, embarrassed, but at least he knows he still has a chance to make things right with you.

(When you do make up, you’re surprised to find flowers and $10 coupon for your favorite pizza place in your mailbox a few days later. They’re from Connie, and his poorly handwritten note thanks you for “saving the team” and “curbing Eren’s temper).

[dannywagnerenthusiast]

Empty Seat Moments Two: The Auditorium Chair DRW x SFK x Reader

Hey everyone! Part two of empty seat moments is here! This one is a little angsty, so let me know how you like it!

A/N: leave a comment if you want me to post Sam's letter to Danny and y/n ;)

“We’ll be right out in the audience, my love. I am so proud of you.” Danny dropped a quick peck to your cheek before adjusting your sleeve and rubbing your arm gently before leaving you alone backstage.

Even though you had your typed-up speech in your hands and had read it over and over throughout the past week, you were still shaking with nerves. You were finally being acknowledged with an award for your hard work at your job, and you were being celebrated as the guest of honor at an elegant gala.

At this point, it had been weeks since you and your boyfriend Danny invited your best friend Sam into your relationship, and things were going almost suspiciously easy.

Sam slotted into your relationship seamlessly, spending nearly all of his time at yours and Danny’s apartment. The ease with which the three of you shared affection made your heart flutter even just thinking about it.

And even just a passing glance about the way Sam slotted into your sex life caused a deep throb between your legs. You find yourself getting lost in recalling the way Danny had spread both you and Sam out on the bed the night before, going down on you torturously slow while fucking Sammy in the spooning position.

“Hello, earth to y/n!”

Embarrassed, you clear your throat and say hello to your work partner, who is also being honored tonight. You two had spent many long nights making this project come together, and you were ecstatic that everyone you loved was coming together to honor your work tonight.

“I’m really proud of us.” You said, bumping your hip against your co-workers as you made your way towards the side stage. You could hear your boss speaking, no doubt giving introduction to the project you were being honored for.

“I’m just glad it’s fucking done, honestly!” Your coworker laughed. “Now I just need to flex on my boyfriend from the stage so he gives it to me good tonight.”

Your mind flicks to Danny and Sam, who would be sitting in the audience, along with your parents and Danny’s. You were really excited for them to see what you had been working on for so long- and your coworker had the right idea too, the afterparty would certainly be fun.

Again, the nerves flare in your stomach. You were confident in your project and your coworker, but the speech left you feeling shaky.

As a surprise to both Sam and Danny tonight, you would be referring to them as your partners in your thanking portion of the night. You would keep it lowkey with your parents and in-laws there, but nonetheless, they would know what you mean. And damn if you weren’t excited.

Suddenly you’re being escorted onto the stage under blindingly bright lights, and the audience is whooping and cheering on their feet. You proudly make eye contact with your coworker and allow the moment to wash over you. For now, the lights are too bright to identify anyone sitting in the audience, so you allow yourself to simply relish the pride for just a minute.

Your coworker is the first one to step up to the podium so you shuffle to the side, smiling on as she describes your shared hard work and dedication. When her personal portion of her speech begins, you begin scanning over the crowd to search for your loved ones.

You spot Lori and Dan, your mom and Dad, and Danny, all smiling at you proudly, beaming. But when Danny catches your eye, he looks apologetic. Then your eyes land on the empty auditorium seat next to Danny.

Sam hadn’t come.

Your smile falters for a fraction of a second right as your coworker is finishing her speech. You adjust your face and graciously hug your friend before stepping up to the podium with your heart in your shoes.

Somehow you’re able to make it through the portion of your speech where you describe the trials and victories of this project, and the crowd is responding to your subtle humor and grace beautifully. They can’t tell that your heart is breaking.

You obviously can’t read the part of the speech that you already had written, so you decide to just speak from the heart to close out the night.

“Finally, I owe a lot of people some very sincere thank-you’s for not letting me go crazy while working on this project.” The crowd chuckles.

“To my parents, who flew all the way here for this night. Thank you for always believing in me and my dreams. I wouldn’t be anywhere without your love and support. I owe this all to you. I love you.” You can see your dad wipe away a tear and your mom blows you a kiss from the crowd.

“To my in-laws Lori and Dan, thank you for being like my second parents and providing me with a home-away-from-home. Thanks for being a listening ear and letting me rant like a crazy person sometimes,” more laughter from the crowd. “You mean more to me than you’ll ever know, I love you.” Dan is looking misty-eyed and clapping hard, and Lori is fully crying, holding on tight to your mother.

“Danny, you’re my everything.”

The look on Danny’s face is hard to read, but his eyes give him away. There are tears brewing on his lashes, threatening to fall, and even from the stage you think that you can see his lip shake.

“I really think I would have lost my mind a long time ago without you. I don’t know how to tell you how much I love you, so I’ll just say thank you for everything. Thank you for being you, thank you for loving me.”

Before you can stop yourself, your eyes dart to the empty seat to his left, so you add to your speech, “thanks for being here, Danny. I love you so much.”

“It really is the honor of a lifetime to accept this award with my coworker, who has been nothing short of a dream to work with. We worked so hard, and now we are going to relax even harder! Thank you all so much.”

With that, you and your coworker walked arm-in-arm off the stage, celebrating the successful speeches and successful night. Still, your mind was on that cursed empty seat beside your boyfriend.

“Baby girl!” Your mom is pulling you into a bone crushing hug the moment you’re off stage, and you allow yourself to be wrapped up in her warmth and comfort. “Hi, ma.” you smile at her.

“I am so proud of you baby!” She finally relinquishes your hug so that she can share you with your dad, who also sweeps you into a big teary hug. “So proud of you, my girl.” As your dad holds you, you can see Dan, Lori, and Danny happily watching the tender moment. You give a little wave as best you can from within the hug, causing the Wagners to smile.

“That was an incredible speech, y/n.” Dan says when your dad finally lets you go. “You were great up there, you should think about replacing Daniel on the next tour!” Laughing, you thank your father-in-law and move to give Lori a big hug, who is still working hard to compose herself.

“I’m sorry, I just can’t stop crying! You’re amazing, sweetie!” Lori says, gushing over you. You laugh and hug her again, thanking her and Dan again for coming. They, along with your parents, decide to go find some circulating champagne to give you a minute with Danny.

“Hi.” he smiles at you from his spot a few paces away.

“Hi, yourself.” You give him a small smile and close the distance between the two of you. You thread your arms around his waist and lean back, letting yourself look into the face of the man you love for a moment.

“That speech, my love… you had me in tears. I am amazed by you, sweetheart.” Finally Danny is pulling you into a sweet kiss.

You hum contentedly, but when you pull away from the kiss, Danny’s eyes are scanning over your face.

“So he didn’t come, huh?” you ask your boyfriend sadly.

“I’m really sorry, baby. I’ve been calling him all afternoon to remind him. I just can’t get a hold of him.” He reaches his thumbs around to stroke softly under your eyes where large droplets of tears are starting to fall.

“I just really wanted him here, Dan.” you whimper pathetically, letting your head fall against Danny’s chest. “I even put the stupid tickets on the fridge with a magnet.” You huff out a sad laugh.

Danny just gently sways you back and forth and hums a bit in thought. “Get a drink?” you ask him, and he nods. Grabbing your hand, you move to find your little group of parents that have taken up residence at one of the standing tables in the reception room.

“Everything ok, honey?” Lori asks you, handing you a flute of champagne.

“I’m ok, just feeling a little overwhelmed.” You sip your drink and lean on Danny as he rubs soothing circles on your hip. She smiles gently at you and continues the conversation at hand.

***

Some hours later, you find yourself holding Danny’s hand on the walk back through the hallway to your apartment door. A little tipsy off the celebratory champagne, your mind was more at ease than it was before the drinks started flowing.

That is, until Danny opens your apartment door.

Instantly, you’re hit with the overwhelming smell of weed. Sitting on the ground in front of the couch is Sam, with his head tossed back onto the cushion, eyes closed and looking blissed out.

You and Danny both stop dead in your tracks in the doorway. Sam is too far gone to even hear his two partners arrive before you’re bolting down the hallway into your bedroom and slamming the door shut.

“Baby, wait!” Danny calls out after you, chasing you down for a few steps before deciding to deal with Sam first before comforting you.

Danny calling out to you finally alerts Sam to your presence, so he’s lazily picking his head up off the couch cushion and smiling lustfully at Danny.

“There you are, been thinkin’ ‘bout you all day” Sam giggles, making grabby hands towards Danny as he very clumsily stands up.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Sam?! We’ve been calling you all afternoon!” Danny’s voice is a harsh whisper. He’s up in Sam’s face now, grabbing at the collar of Sam’s shirt to bring him close enough so that you wouldn’t have to hear him yelling.

“Turned my phone off Dan, was waiting for you and y/n to get home…?” Sam trailed off, seeming confused but not at all clarified to the situation at hand. “What are you…” Danny is shoving Sam away from his space with a disgusted scoff, leaving Sam with a bewildered look on his face.

Louder now, voice approaching a shout, Danny gestures wildly at the lone ticket that is still stuck by a magnet onto the fridge. “Did you forget?!”

In an instant, Sam seems to sober up. His eyes are wide and when he looks down he realizes that his hands are shaking wildly.

From your place under the covers, you can hear Danny, enraged, yelling at Sammy, asking him if he forgot the most important day of your career. Once again you can’t stop the tears from falling, and this time you decide not to fight them. Instead, you tuck your head under Danny’s pillow and will yourself to fall asleep.

Back in the kitchen, tears have begun flowing from Sammy’s eyes, too. Danny scoffs at him again and turns on his heel towards the bedroom to go comfort his girlfriend. Suddenly, Sam grabs at Danny’s wrist gently.

“Wait Danny, please. I didn’t handle this right, but I didn’t forget, please follow me, Dan. Please, I’m…just please follow me.”

Danny takes pity on his best friend turned lover and lets Sam lead him around the corner from the kitchen into the formal dining room of the apartment, which rarely gets used.

When Danny saw what was spread out before him, he let out a barely audible gasp.

He turned to Sam with his eyebrows raised, and instantly Sammy was melting into Danny’s embrace. Sam was a puddle, crying and heaving into Danny's button down, fists clenching the fabric.

With a gentle kiss to the crown of Sam’s hairline, Danny asks Sam, “what happened, baby? Talk to me.”

Lifting his head off Danny’s chest, Sam’s pitiful teary eyes search Danny’s before he begins explaining himself.

“When I saw the tickets on the fridge, I assumed it was, uh, it was a...couple’s thing. So I thought that you two would go to the event and I would stay here. But I needed y/n to know how proud I am of her, so I set all this up so that the three of us could celebrate when you guys got home.” Danny’s heart was breaking listening to Sam’s voice crack as he stumbled over his words.

Sammy cleared his throat and went on, “I even wrote everything out in a card, Danny.” He points to a sealed envelope on the dining table next to a vase of white roses. “ I wrote down everything I  was feeling about her. About you. Everything I am feeling. And you know how bad I am with words, Dan.” He emphasizes that point with a gentle swat to Danny’s chest.

That earns a gentle chuckle from the taller man, who is so proud of his best friend. The two boys take a moment to just hold each other and admire the work that Sam had put into the usually neglected dining room.

Soft twinkling white lights bordered the perimeter of the ceiling, casting the entire room in a pale glow. An enormous glass vase at the center was filled with fresh white roses. Three empty wine glasses and a bottle of red wine sat to one side. A large platter of cheese, crackers, and various other treats sat to the other side. A beautiful cake with “congratulations, y/n!” written on it sat front and center, alongside a large envelope with your name on it, scrawled in Sammy’s script.

Taking a deep breath, Danny gave a playful smack to Sam’s ass before turning him around by the shoulders, pointing him toward the bedroom. “You’d better go get our girl and show this to her before she accuses me of conspiring with the enemy.”

For a quick second, visible nerves flash across Sam’s face. With a reassuring smile and nod from Danny, Sam makes his way to you.

****

You’re starting to get very frustrated at your inability to fall asleep. The multiple glasses of champagne should have helped you greatly, but your mind is fighting it hard.

You had heard Danny raise his voice at Sam once, asking him if he’d forgotten about tonight, but you hadn’t been able to hear anything since. Just as you’re about to get up and make sure that the two haven’t killed each other, you hear the hinges to your bedroom door open.

You can’t see who it is through the dark, but you venture a guess anyway. “Danny?”

“It’s me,” Sam says quietly, standing in the open doorway.

“Oh,” you allow yourself to sink back into the blankets you were tucked into, waiting for him to approach you.

“Can I come in?” Sam asks. To you his voice sounds shaky, scared almost. You’d feel bad if you weren’t the one heartbroken here.

“Okay,” you resign with a sigh. You sit up a little higher against the headboard and wrap yourself snugly in the cocoon of warmth you had created. You were being cold, but you weren’t going to shut him out completely. You’d hear what he has to say, and then decide.

Sam approaches your bed and looks a little hesitant before deciding to also sit at the head of the bed next to you. You look at him expectantly while he looks at you apologetically.

At the very same time you say “You didn’t come.” He says, “I didn’t know you wanted me to come.”

You roll your eyes and shirk down a little lower into the bed. “It’s not like I had yours and Dan’s tickets on the fridge for the past two weeks” you mumble.

Sam stays silent for a minute, but from the corner of your eye you swear you can see a sad smile on his face. Suddenly you jump as he barks out a harsh chuckle. You look up, so confused, to see your best friend in your bed, doubled over in laughter with tears streaming down his face.

You can’t help from chuckling along with his monstrous laugh, and eventually you’re able to force out a, “Sammy, what?!”

“I thought those were Danny’s and your tickets.”

Dead silence fills the room before the two of you are uproariously laughing. You find yourself tucked into his embrace as the two of you can’t control yourselves, stomachs and cheeks aching. “I didn’t need a ticket, babe, I was the big event!” You laugh.

This, however, stops Sam’s laughter in his tracks. He looks down at you in his arms.

“I really am sorry, baby. I know this was such an important night for you. I truly thought this was like a… couples only thing.”

At this, your heart shatters more than you thought it already had.

“Sammy, that’s why I wanted you there.”

Sam’s breath hitches in his throat, and fresh tears are pricking at his eyes. He frantically pulls you in for a stifling kiss, pouring out all his feelings of love, commitment, passion, longing; everything you could put into a kiss is there. “Come with me, baby. Need to show you something.” He rasps as he breaks the kiss, leaving the two of you gasping for air.

As Sam drags you from your bed, down the hall and towards the dining room, you see Danny’s shadow sitting at the couch. He’s obviously listening, so he knows what’s going on. When Sam turns the corner, you’re presented with the transformed dining room and all the work that Sam put into it.

Before you can even thank Sam for how stunningly decorated the room looks, he’s shoving an envelope into your hands. “Danny! Come here!” He’s shouting, and sitting you down into one of the plush dining seats.

When Danny rounds the corner, he’s wearing a smile at the sight of his two loves having made up. Nobody has said that word between the three of you yet, but Danny has a feeling that the envelope in y/n’s hand is about to change all that. Sam places a swift kiss on your mouth, then one on Danny’s as he shoves Danny’s shoulders to get him into a chair as well.

“You guys know I’m not the best with feelings, but I hope this gets the message across. I, uhm, I really love you two.”

Tears shine in all three of your eyes as you look between Sam and Danny, frantically tearing the envelope open…

[earnestly-endlessly]

*flies in like magneto* can i get some exes to lovers™?

Do I have some exes to lovers fics for you? Yes I certainly do. It seems that the cherik fandom loves some exes to lovers cherik and I don't blame anyone because this ship really calls for all the angst. I hope you enjoy this list.

Exes to Lovers AU

Bound – FuryRed

Summary: Is there anything worse than someone else’s wedding? Well, perhaps your sister’s wedding- where the groom just has to invite his boss and that man just happens to be your ex-boyfriend; a person you had an extremely passionate and tumultuous relationship with that ended badly.

Charles hadn’t seen Erik for a year by the time Raven had told him about the wedding. He wasn’t looking forward to the occasion, particularly when Raven explained that they would be celebrating the event with a two-week extravaganza at a luxury hotel, meaning that Charles would be forced to spend a whole fortnight with the man who he’d given everything to; the man who had ultimately broken his heart…

Preheat to 350 (just for you remix) – ikeracity

Summary: Charles realizes he's in love with Erik. But there's one tiny little problem: he just broke up with Erik.

Thread Through a Needle – Black_Betty

Summary: Erik and Charles are broken up. Neither of them want to be.

Carry Me Anew (Frost & Darkholme Remix) – kianspo

Summary: While working as a model for Raven and Emma's clothing line, Erik experiences a strong attraction to his shoot partner. These things happen, except Erik has a boyfriend, who does not take this at all well.

Linger like a tattoo kiss – ikeracity

Summary: Six months apart gives Erik a lot of time to think about what he really wants.

(Erik's POV from Carry Me Anew (Frost & Darkholme Remix) by kianspo)

Symphysis – ikeracity

Summary: After Charles and Erik broke up four months ago, Charles convinced himself he'd never see Erik again. But life has a funny way of bringing people back together.

Call/Response – phalangine

Summary: Charles and Erik have a real conversation for the first time since breaking up. Charles is looking to avoid confrontation. Erik is not.

Regression Therapy – Fantine_Black

Summary: O, God, he’d made a terrible mistake. Whatever he’d expected to find here, Erik was still Erik, a man he’d moved continents to avoid. In retrospect, that felt like a rather good idea…

Four years after Charles walked away from Professor Lehnsherr, the two meet again for a drink.

Because things are better the second time round, aren't they?

Forever is Only a Drunk Dial Away – bettysofia

Summary: Charles is sad and drunk and stalking Erik's Instagram.

Shop Space – Caradee

Summary: Charles and Erik break up but still meet at their favorite coffee shop and manage a completely friendly relationship. The kids who work the coffee shop don't understand it, Charles' overprotective twin brother doesn't understand it, and even Charles doesn't understand it. Then, Erik shows up with a new date, someone who seems to be everything that Charles is not.

How will the Professor handle the surprising heartbreak that comes seeing Erik with someone else?

Mutant House at Dead Kings College – mabyn

Summary: When it comes to romance, Charles has terrible timing.

Can You Feel My Heart – FuryRed

Summary: Erik Lehnsherr hates Charles Xavier.

It’s as true as the words written on the wall in the bathroom at the university that Erik attends. Erik sees them one day- accompanied by a crude drawing of Erik and Charles glaring at each other- and recognises the truth of the sentence, and smiles.

He hates Charles.

Probably…

Believe (One More Time) – luninosity

Summary: For the prompt, Charles and Erik dated during college and had a bitter break-up right before graduation. It's five years later and they both meet again at their class's reunion for a weekend. Someone was even stupid enough to have them room with each other for the weekend...

Old Flame Burning – TurtleTotem

Summary: It's ridiculous for Charles to dread meeting the best man at his sister's wedding, just because he shares a name with Charles's ex. It's not as though it could possibly be the same Erik.

Don’t speak to the bartender – Wild_Imagination

Summary: Logan is a bartender, it's a gloomy evening, and in his bar there's someone with a broken heart. But this is not a movie.

Right?

Somewhere I’m Going & Have Never Been Before – Yahtzee

Summary: In late December 1984, Charles falls victim to the terrible pandemic sweeping across the globe. He's sick, probably dying, and utterly alone in an isolated cabin...until he's not.

Walking in a Winter Wonderland – TurtleTotem

Summary: Charles hasn't seen Erik since their devastating breakup ten years ago. He's certainly the last person he expects to run into at a Christmas lights display.

Lean On Me – SpiritsFlame

Summary: Ten years ago, Charles and Erik split up, dividing their six kids between them. None of them expect them to meet at summer camp. And no one could have predicted the results.

It was a yellow umbrella spring – ikeracity

Summary: Three years after Charles left for Oxford, Erik discovers that Charles is coming back to New York.

Second chances are wonderful things.

My heart above my head – annejumps

Summary: Emma thinks her coworker Erik and her friend and fellow telepath Charles should get together. No one expects things to get so intense so quickly.

The Edge of What Doesn’t End – populuxe

Summary: When a mysterious object appears on the moon, Moira MacTaggert calls in two experts with very specific mutations to investigate.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, after years of breaking up and getting back together again, those two experts have finally broken up for good—and they’re the last people in the world who should be stuck together on a spaceship.

Exit Wounds – LemonadeGarden

Summary: It's been eight months since Charles and Erik had a fight that broke apart their marriage. When a mutant rights protest goes awry and Charles begins to get sick, past memories and present obstacles begin to blur the lines of their ideological differences.

Alternatively: Charles and Erik learn how to fall in love again in troubled times.

Note: Unfinished

11 Days, 8 Hours and 12 Minutes (or Bruises, Stupidity and Anger Management) – ximeria

Summary: For six months, Erik and Charles have been the disgustingly happy couple of the school. Considering their pigheadedness and general communication skills (or lack thereof), things are bound to go boom at some point.

Moon Song – ikeracity

Summary: Werewolf AU. When Charles is captured by hunters, Erik and his pack go after him. It turns out there might be some room for redemption left for both of them after all.

I will Never Stop Loving You – swoopswoop

Summary: Erik and Charles split up three years ago but Erik never really got over it and then one day when the man who walked out of his life three years ago is walking down the street towards him, Erik sees an opportunity to mend fences.

Please leave your message after the tone – ikeracity

Summary: Spending his evening getting shitfaced and pining over Erik seems like a totally productive use of Charles's time. Luckily, it turns out to be a better idea than it sounds.

When the Spell Breaks – kianspo

Summary: Erik, a high-profile lawyer with a successful career, meets a 21-year-old grad student in a bar, and within a few short months marries him. He and Charles are blissfully happy, until Erik's boss runs a background check on Charles and discovers he's been cheating on Erik. Charles denies everything, as there was no affair, but Erik doesn't believe him and throws him out. As Charles tries to figure out how to survive and stay at school that he can no longer afford and makes a lot of bad if not plain dangerous choices, Erik has to fight his own battle of discovering the truth and winning Charles back.

We have not touched the stars, nor are we forgiven (the things you love don’t last remix) – hllfire

Summary: Charles hands Erik the signed divorce papers, but Erik has changed his mind. Too late, it seems. All he can do is go forward with the divorce.

A year later, Charles comes back, and Erik can't help but wanting to see him. The only problem is things don't go like Erik had planned.

Suddenly There’ll Be a Blizzard (Let it Snow Remix) – kianspo

Summary: Charles was never at his best while jetlagged, but locking himself out in a snowstorm while barely dressed might be a new low. The last thing he expected was to be rescued by his high school nemesis, the man he hadn't seen in over ten years, who might have broken his heart for good once upon a time.

Write this number down (you can call it anytime) – pocky_slash

Summary: When Erik upsets his children, they have a habit of running away from home--and straight to Charles' school for cookies and consolation. Charles doesn't mind the visitors, but as they appear more and more frequently, he realizes that sooner or later, he and Erik are going to have to talk about what happened on the beach and what it means for their future and the future of Erik's children.

All we do is break up (and make up) – Stuckyl0v3r

Summary: "So instead of making the most out of this next months, because you don't know where either of you is going to end up, you decided to stay away from each other to get used to the feeling?" Hank summed up, stopping in front of the class. Charles nodded his head confidently and beamed at him, but somehow his smile didn't reach his eyes.

"Yes, something like that."

Well, that was the most idiotic plan Hank's ever heard.

Three wheels of cheese and a Great White – ximeria

Summary: Charles and Erik were friends with benefits in college.

They went their separate ways and 18 years later, they run into each other in New York.

The sex was never a problem back in college - and sex was all it had been. But now Erik is a divorced father and Charles has admitted to himself he needs more than just sex in a relationship. So in their usual round-about way they try to navigate becoming friends after so many years. The whole quest is aided by Raven, Edie, Wanda and Pietro (and a large number of shark jokes).

[dreamescapeswriting]

Curiosity Killed The Cat ~ LMH & LF [M] [Request]

WORD COUNT: 4.9K

PAIRING: Minho x Fem!Reader x Felix

GENRE: consensual smut, Hitman au, mentions of death, assisnation, bombings, blood, face riding, oral, threesome, M/F/M, after care, no protection

A/N: Please I had so much fun with this! I love writing AU’s so much!!! 🥺🥰💗 Hope this is okay for you my lovely little anon!

"If you don't stop tapping that pen I'm going to shove it so far down your neck you'll whistle when you breathe," Minho growled in Felix's direction as they sat together in an old beat-up car. All Felix had done for the last four hours was tap and click the pen over and over again deciding that he was single-handedly going to be the one driving force that made Minho want to quit his job.

"I don't see anything else to do," Felix countered as he stared back at his partner who simply glared at him before looking out of the window again. It was a stupid idea to stake out a university it looked suspicious that two men were waiting in a car outside but it was the bosses orders. Stake out the school and wait for the suspect to come out but it felt creepy. Although it was a university and most of the students were their age it was strange to them both.

"Have we actually seen him go in?" The truth was no one had seen the guy that they were after in almost seven months, he was good at hiding which was why he was nicknamed "The Chameleon," something Minho hated. Why give the bad guy a name it was only going to boost the ego even more. 

"He's supposedly acting as a student," Minho handed the folder over to Felix keeping his eyes on the door, the Chameleon could walk out right under your nose and no one would have an idea it was him. 

"Why a student? Surely it would be feeling for him to be a teacher," Felix flicked through the folder the guy was a serial bomber that his company had been after for years. He'd killed almost over 100 people with no remorse whatsoever. It was as if the guy was a robot, he didn't care who he hurt as long as he got what he wanted, not that anyone knew what that was. His clues were always so vague. One thing for sure, it wasn't money that he was after. 

The government had tried to pay him to stop the needless killings only for the guy to blow the bag up in the middle of the street. 

"Easier to hide...Won't be so obvious when things go missing around the school...The student we're looking at fits his usual MO." Minho sighed taking a deep breath and looking at Felix for the first time in an hour. It was beginning to worry him the closer the two of them got to catching the guy. Their job wasn't a simple catch him and arrest him, no, they were the last resort. Kill him on sight as soon as they know, without a shadow of a doubt that it's him. Assassins or as they were better known as now, Hitmen. 

"Transfers in the middle of the year, things from the science department go missing and then there's the-" Right as Minho was about to explain that there were constant fire drills the alarm began to blare out through the school. 

"Those," He mumbled staring back over at the double-doored exit from the school. There was no use sitting at the entrance when they knew he liked to hide from everyone, if he was the one doing this they needed to find him and quickly before anyone else got hurt. 

"Another drill?" You mumbled looking to your left to see your best friend Mina smirking at you, you rolled your eyes knowing why she was so happy. Thanks to the fire alarm she was going to get out of her final exam and pass it no matter what, 

"It wouldn't surprise me if you were the one pulling them," You mumbled sarcastically as you pulled your satchel over your shoulder, looking around for her so-called boyfriend. 

"What did you do? Get Farara to pull it?" You teased as you jabbed your elbow into her side, walking out into the courtyard and taking in a deep breath, 

"You need to relax, we've just finished exams and you're still studying," Mina rolled her eyes at you, it was always the same with her. She wanted you to let your hair down and relax while you wanted to focus on things that were important to you, like actually passing your course. 

"I have another two years to go, you're done. I'm just getting started." You reminded her as you looked around, you loved Mina with all of your heart but since meeting Farara she seemed to be getting in trouble more. Not only with the university but with the police. Just last week you'd been called down to the station to bail her out because she was caught driving around in a stolen car with enough products to set a whole house on fire. 

"Take a year off, come with me and Farara to England. He's going to take me away and spend time with his family." The more you heard about the guy the more worry began to grow inside of you. She'd hardly known him and yet she was planning to run away to a different country with him,

"What does he even do for a living? To get all of this money?" You questioned hoping she wouldn't get too annoyed with you asking her about him. It seemed as though whenever you asked questions she would get pissed at you, claiming that you were just trying to poke holes in their "relationship,"

"What does it matter?" She stared at you with a disgusted look on her face, 

"Hey, baby!" A voice cried out as a pair of strong-looking arms wrapped around Mina.

"Snuckums!" She practically squealed making you jump as she turned around and began making out with him grotesquely in front of everyone. 

"That's my cue to leave," You said loud enough for them to hear, turning to head home to your dorms when Mina grabbed your arm. 

"Party tonight. Come with us," She begged looking at you with pleading eyes, as you were about to decline Farara scoffed at the thought of it. 

"Y/n? At a party, don't make me laugh. She's the party pooper baby, she doesn't know how to have fun." For some reason, the anger bubbled up inside of you and it seemed to annoy you more. If Mina had been the one to say it it wouldn't have bothered you as much but from him, you wanted to prove him wrong. 

"I'll be there. Text me the details," You smiled smugly in his direction but he just seemed to smirk, it made you feel uneasy to see him smirking at you like that. 

"This will be great! A going-away party right baby!?" Mina squealed before making out with him once again.

After spending almost four hours trying to pick something to wear you finally felt ready to go and headed straight to the party. It was at the frat house Farara had been living in since he got to the university. The whole walk over from your dorms you could have sworn someone was following you along. 

"Glad you could join us, take this." Mina handed you a drink and then laid a flower necklace around you before disappearing into the house leaving you alone. 

The whole house seemed to be partying hard, loud music was blaring for different speakers each of which was playing a different song. People were already yelling and dancing drunkenly along the floor and not to mention someone throwing up in a flower pot. 

"You came pretty late, didn't think you were going to show," Farara smirked once he caught sight of you in the kitchen. You hummed before putting down the cup Mina had given to you, there was no way you were going to drink that night. Not unless it was water at least. You didn't know anyone besides Mina and she was clearly preoccupied with other things.

"We have juice boxes in the basement," Farara joked earning a laugh from someone else in the kitchen but Mina pushed him softly. 

"Leave Y/n alone, she came and that's all that matters. Come on, let's go dance." She pulled you straight into the living room without giving you a chance to answer her. 

"Isn't this fun?! I'm so sad you never got to have parties all year," She pouted at you, wrapping her arms around your waist as she swayed in time to whatever song she heard first. The mixture of the songs and stench alcohol all starting to hurt your head the longer that you stood there but you were at least going to wait an hour before heading home. 

"What the fuck are we doing?" Minho mumbled as he stared down at the jeans and shirt he was wearing, Felix had dressed in the same outfit only a different coloured shirt. When Felix suggested going to the party Minho didn't think he meant actually attending it.

"We're blending in." He chuckled laying one of the flower necklaces around Minho's neck who stared at him with a filthy look the moment it touched his chest. 

"What better way to find out information than going to the people that know the guy." It still didn't make Minho feel any better about being at some kind of dumb University frat party. Everyone was drunk and drooling over one another except for the girl that they had followed over, you. 

"Look," Minho nudged Felix and nodded in your direction as they watched you heading for the bathroom alone. You stood out amongst the rest, instead of dancing or drinking you were simply looking for a bathroom and keeping your head down. They only knew about the party because they'd overheard you and Mina talking about it earlier that day. 

"She looks like she could be here to help, we saw them speaking with one another earlier," Minho reminded Felix but he shook his head,

"She does look like she wants to be here, they didn't look like they liked one another." Minho shrugged his shoulders as he thought back on it, 

"All good acting," The two of them weren't sure if Farara had a partner this time but in all of his other bombings, he had someone. Someone who would take the fall for him, usually the good girl gone bad once they met him and fell for his traps. Promising them a life of happiness in another country, planning everything out so it would seem as though he truly loved and cared for them when he didn't. 

"I'm just saying we find The Chemelon, take care of business and leave," Felix whispered as they made their way through to the kitchen when they saw him. A loud laugh spread through the air that physically sent shivers down their spines, watching as he left out of the kitchen door and down the back garden. 

"Follow him," They said in unison as they headed out of the same door, keeping their heads down as they tried to see what it was he was doing. 

Stepping out onto the back porch you took in a long deep breath of the cold air, it felt nice to have it circulating through you instead of the stuffy air from inside. Mina had begged you to stay once she caught you trying to leave, making you promise her that you wouldn't go anywhere until she found Farara who had run off leaving her in charge of the party. In your mind, he was out fucking someone else since he seemed like a player but you weren't about to tell one of your best friends that. 

The longer you stood there the more you wanted to go home but as you looked down at the end of the garden you frowned. Inside the small shed, there was a flashing light coming through the window and you could have sworn you heard someone grunting. 

"I swear to god if this is Farara I'll murder him," You mumbled to yourself as you began to walk towards the building. All you were going to do was look through the window, if it was him you'd find Mina and tell her. If it wasn't him you'd just act as though you hadn't seen anything but the closer you got the more uneasy you began to grow. Something inside of you was telling you to turn back but you weren't about to let your friend get cheated on by some good for nothing low-life.

"Tell us what you're planning and maybe we'll let you off easy," Felix whispered in Farara's ear from behind him. They'd followed him out and found him packing up a suitcase which meant the bombing was sooner than expected from him. 

"I don't know what you're talking about," The boy stuttered as he stared between the two men in front of him, both of them had guns on display to intimidate him into speaking. As if being strapped into a chair with garden rope wasn't scary enough for him.

"Look, we know who you are. Just tell us where the bomb is," As soon as the word bomb left Minho's mouth he heard a gasp and branch snap from outside the shed. His eyes met with Felix and he nodded over to the side door where Felix could easily get out without being seen. 

Stepping back from the building you tried to move out of the way but ended up backing into someone who pushed you back to the window. Forcing you to stare through it as the man inside shot Farara in the chair he was strapped to. There was no sound from the gun you just saw a blur before Farara dropped forward, lifeless in the chair as blood pooled from the small entrance wound in his head. A small scream was building up in your throat but before you could say a word a hand was covering your mouth and you were ushered into the shed. 

"Clean up to Agents 322 and 366," The man who had killed Farara said down a small earpiece looking over at you with a small smirk on his face, 

"What a curious little kitten," Felix purred in your ear as he ran his fingers up and down your cheek making you shiver, 

“Curiosity Killed The Cat you know,” Minho chuckled as he looked over at you from his phone.

 "I'll ask you once, and only once." Minho lowered himself to your level, looking you in the eyes. 

"Do you know who he's working with? Your friend maybe? Could she have known what he was planning?" Bile rose up in your throat as you watched the blood pooling onto the floor, running along to Mino's shoes as he stood there. 

"Mina. S-She wouldn't have know...I don't think," You looked back at Minho, the gut feeling inside of you seemed to subside as you looked at him and Felix who was now standing in front of you. 

"You don't seem scared that we just killed your friend?" Felix questioned looking from the body and back to you, your eyes get dancing to and from Farara, half expecting him to jump up and have this be some kind of joke. 

"A friend? I didn't know him and he did nothing but belittle me...What was it you said about a bomb?" Curiosity began to build in Minho as he watched you, there wasn't even an ounce of fear towards them from you. 

"Have you heard of the Chameleon?" The realization hit you as you stared at Farara. 

"He fits the MO." You mumbled shocking Felix who just seemed to stare at you in disbelief. 

"You're training to be in the forces?" Minho asked as he laid a garden sheet over the body, your eyes staring back at him this time. 

"My father was an FBI agent, I know some things...I know you're not FBI." A smirk plastered across Felix's lips as he watched you and Minho interacting the way you were. It was the first time he'd ever seen Minho act so casually with someone in months, not to mention he seemed laid back. 

"How do you know that?" Felix quizzed looking over at you as he folded his arms over his chest. 

"For starters, neither of you have a badge otherwise you would have shown me by now, your guns aren't standard issue for agents...So you're hitmen...That or random psychopaths." Minho blinked at you before standing up straight when he heard a knock on the door. 

"Clean up crew," Minho pulled the door open and ushered you out with Felix on your other side. 

"Do you need help with her?" A female voice asked as you turned your whole body to see a female staring at you. 

"No thanks, you go and clean up. We'll take her home." Your eyes shot up to the one with the deep voice, Felix, and you frowned. 

"We'll make sure you get home safe," Minho added when he could see how confused you were. 

Leading you over to their car you stared at it, it was the same car that had been following you earlier. 

"You followed me here," The back door opened and you crawled inside, looking around at all of the empty food packets. 

"Ignore the mess, we were on a stakeout," Felix chuckled as he got into the front passenger seat and glanced back at you. 

"I'm Felix and this is Minho," He shook your hand and you felt a spark ignite inside of you. The way his hand fit around yours made you shiver a little, 

"Look at that, someone liked your touch Lix." Your eyes shot to Minho started up the car and smirked at you through the small review mirror. 

"Give us your address kitten," The small nickname made you clench your thighs as you could feel an aerosol building. After giving them your dorm address you began trying to pull yourself back together, you'd just watch them kill someone and yet you were getting wet at the thought of them calling you kitten. It didn't help that they were insanely attractive, Felix's muscles could be seen through the thin white shirt he was wearing and Minho's ass looked like he worked out an awful lot. You blinked, ignoring the growing wetness that was pooling between your legs. 

"Look at that, we haven't said one suggestive comment and you're squeezing your little thighs together," Minho chuckled as he reached a red light, turning to look at you from the front seat and licking his lips at the sight of you. Completely innocent and sitting there rubbing your legs together as if that was going to give you any kind of satisfaction that you were desperately craving. 

"My guess is she's going to go home and touch herself to the thought of us," Minho teased as he began to drive once again, watching Felix as he turned to look at you. His eyes locking with you as he reached behind to rub your knee softly. 

"I mean she doesn't have to think of us, we could do it for you princess." The car stopped outside your dorm but you made no attempt to move as the car was shut off. 

"Would you like that?" Minho questioned turning his body to look at you. The need to press your thighs together built up but Felix kept them apart, licking his lips as he waited for you to answer the question. A finger trailed up and down your knee and you shuddered, 

"Yes! Yes...Yes, I would like that," You spoke loudly as you stared at both of them, the two exchanged a smirk with one another before climbing out of the car and holding your door open.

"Then who are we to let a pretty little kitten go home needy," Felix growled in your ear, holding your arm as you all walked in the direction of your dorm room.

Neither of them wasted time when they got into your room, attaching their lips to either side of your neck as you let out small whimpers of pleasure. You could already feel each of them smirking against your skin, Felix's hands around your waist while Minho kept his on your breasts, massaging them softly with his hands whenever you would whimper. 

"Here we thought you were the good girl," Minho whispered making you jerk away from him, 

"I'm not. I'm sick of people saying that to me," You spat at him your eyes locking with his as he tilted his head to the side, a smug look on his face. 

"Prove it to me," Without another word you pushed him down onto your bed sinking to your knees in front of him. You pulled down the jeans he was wearing discarding them behind you, forgetting about Felix behind you until he laid down on the floor. 

"Up," He ordered, you rose to your knees and he slid under you so his breath was right against your core. 

"Looks pretty," He whispered referencing the bright pink thong you had worn under your dress that night, 

"But it needs to go." One snapping sound later and you felt a cool breeze on your core,

"Dripping wet Minho, you should see her." A finger began to trace along your folds making your hips jolt forward, 

"So wet, pretty and-" A small kiss was placed on your clit and your eyes widened, 

"Tastes define." Felix moaned out in a deep voice, you whimpered looking at Minho. 

"The confidence seems to have faded from you kitten," You ignored him pulling his cock free from his boxer and smirking at the length. He was larger than you expected but you slowly pumped him in one hand, looking up at him smugly as he jerked. Minho shifted a little, leaning back against the bed letting his elbow prop him up. Running your fingers over the indent under the head of his cock your smirk grew wider as he moaned out.

"Good girl," He breathed out as your tongue began to caress him, swirling around the head of his cock before you took him into your warm mouth pumping your head back and forth while your other hand rested on his thigh. 

"My turn," Felix whispered pulling you to sit down on his face as you let out a moan around Minho's cock who seemed to moan out in pleasure. Hollowing out your cheeks you ran your tongue over the indent you'd found earlier and he cried out gripping onto the sheets around him. 

"Oh shit!" You moaned out as you could feel Felix's tongue running through your folds while he worked two fingers in and out of you, curling them up to meet your g-spot making you cry out again. 

Minho thrust up into your mouth as you took him back, moving your head faster this time setting his whole body aflame. Each thrust of your head caused his whole body to stiffen and he looked at you, holding your face as he began to thrust a little more. You smirked around him nodding at him to let him know it was okay and he slowly began to thrust into your mouth. 

"S-Shit she likes that Hyung, clenching around my tongue." Felix chuckled as he continued to eat you out aggressively as you rode his face, your hips bucking little by little as you felt an orgasm beginning to build up inside of you. Minho thrust up once more before his whole body shook and he let out a moan of your name, cumming into your mouth as he rolled his head back. You swallowed every last drop and focused on the pleasure Felix was giving to you, gripping onto the bed as you rocked your hips in time with his licks. 

"So pretty when your face contorts like that," Minho chuckled as he began kissing you softly, holding your neck in his hand lightly as he forced you to look at him, 

"Do you like this? Two strangers fucking you?" You nodded as you let out a choked moan, pulsating around Felix's fingers as he continued to thrust them into you at a rough pace. 

"Cumming!" You screamed out as your hips continued to buck as your orgasm ripped through you, your legs shaking as you tried to stay upright on your knees instead of falling to the floor the way you wanted to. 

"Y/n?" Felix whispered as he pulled himself into a sitting position, watching you as you ripped your dress off from your body, you were ready and you needed one of them inside of you. Now.

Lips met yours over and over again as Minho pulled you up onto the bed, sitting back against the headboard as you straddled his lap. Kissing him wherever you could, lips, neck, collarbone, anywhere you could get your lips on him. Felix sat behind you naked, his cock pressed against your ass as you let out a whine. 

"Still so wet," Felix chuckled as he teased your entrance with two fingers, meanwhile Minho had worked his fingers down to your clit circling slowly. 

"Holy fuck," You breathed out as your head fell forward to rest on top of Minho's. Your brain was in a fog as they continued to tease you with their fingers until Felix sank two inside of you and Minho applied the pressure that made you cry out pushing your hips back into Felix. 

A third finger was added and your whole body felt as though it was on fire, your fingernails dug into Minho's arms as you cried out a mixture of both of their names. 

"Someone is ready for us," Minho chuckled as they removed their fingers making you whimper at the sudden lack of touch from either of them. Felix moved to the edge of the bed and sat in the same position Minho had before. 

"On the floor kitten," He whispered as you got onto your knees in front of him, this time Minho sat behind you with his cock at your entrance causing you to clench around nothing. 

"You sure?" You ignored the stupid question as you sank down onto Minho's cock crying out as you adjusted to the size of him. 

"That..Oh shit...That's a yes Felix," Minho moaned out as he held onto your thighs, grunting at the tight feeling as you wrapped around his cock. Smirking to yourself you looked up at Felix, taking him into your mouth and began to bob your head as you had done with Minho. The two men moaning out in pleasure as you controlled them, moving your hips up and down at a slow pace just to torture Minho that little bit more. 

"Fuck," Minho's hands gripped onto your waist and he thrust up harder and faster into you, his breathing jagged as he moaned out your name. Felix's cock twitched into your mouth as you began to roll your tongue around the head of his cock, reaching your hand down between your thighs to circle your clit. 

Fire was beginning to build in your stomach with both moans from men titling you over the edge. 

"Just like that," Felix cried out as you moved your head in time with Minho's fast thrust. The room filled with wet sounds and slapping skin as you cried out around Felix's length. Felix's hand rested on your cheek as he began to thrust into your mouth, grunting as he came down your throat holding you around him until his hips stopped jerking. 

"M-Minho! I-I’m cumming! I-I’m cumming!" You screamed out as he continued his sinfully fast thrusts until he came into you touching you deeply as your head rolled back against his chest. Clenching onto anything you could get your hands on, screaming out his name. Cumming around him as you pulsated in pure bliss, your whole body felt as though it was shaking. 

Minho smirked as you slept in his shirt, they'd managed to clean you up with a warm wet cloth and got you into bed. 

"Poor thing must be exhausted," He smirked running his fingers over your face as your frowned in deep slumber. 

"That was a nice reward though for finishing our job," Felix laughed as he looked at your body, you were curled up in a small clutching onto the sheets and he smiled. 

"We should get going, paperwork to report and all that," Minho mumbled grabbing a hoodie from your wardrobe as he turned to leave.

The morning you woke up images of what had happened flashed before you and if it hadn't been for the achiness between your thighs. You would have thought it a dream and yet, you were laying there in a shirt that wasn't yours and a note beside your bed,

Until next time Curious Kitten x 

Written at the bottom of the note were two numbers with the boy's initials by the side of them, you clutched the note against your chest as you laid back. Enjoying the memories of the night before. 

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