#I’m like Neil wanting to play exy so bad

[crazy-fangirl2524]

Sometimes I genuinely forget that exy isn’t real like wdym I know this sport better than myself

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - Part 43

PREV

FF is a pretty good student. Solid Bs in his Gen-eds and As in regard to his major. With one C+ that he’s still working on with Captain Neil but it’s higher than the D+ that he had been pulling before Captain Neil had started to tutor him and he really just needs to pass the one gen-ed required math class.

There was many a deep breathing exercise before he made an appointment with his educational advisor for the next semester back in October but it hadn’t been that bad even though she was the one that had asked if he knew anyone good at math since it obviously was not a strong suit of his. So he dragged his grade up from a D+ to a C+ and he was pretty proud of that.

FF has a preferred spot in each and every one of his classrooms. In his Gen-Ed courses he sits in spots that the Professors don’t even notice and where there is almost always a gap between him and the next person. He arrives perfectly almost late every single day for every single class he can to achieve this feat.

For his Major classes he sits near the front with the few Foreign Language major friends that he has.

FF likes to be prepared. Studying was a nice way to prepare for the future. If he’s already read the entire textbook front to back and taken notes then a pop quiz can’t catch him off guard. He double, triple, and quadruple checks homework. He could probably recite the syllabus for any of his classes off the top of his head. He has read it so much to make sure he’s gotten everything and is on track.

FF kind of likes finals week.

For once, for one week, everyone is as anxious as him.

He sits next to Nicky patting his back as his friend sobs into a pillow. “I’m not going to graduate and it’s going to delay seeing Erik by an entire year!” Nicky yells as he brings his face out of the pillow.

“Nicky, you only got one flashcard wrong how about you shut the fuck up!” Aaron yells from his desk where he seems to have spontaneously developed ambidextrousness as he writes notes with both hands. “Fuck I am NEVER fitting all of this one one index card.” Aaron slams his face into the table.

“I don’t even need this degree.” Matt says looking down at a textbook that he has not turned a page on for the last hour. The fact that Matt had also not even opened that textbook before now was a bit of a cause for concern. “I’ve already got offers for professional teams. I can just play Exy. I do not need to pass a workplace psychology course.” Matt says.

“You think Dan wants an idiot?!” Nicky demands not wanting to go down alone.

“She thinks it’s cute that I’m stupid!” Matt exclaims.

“No she doesn’t!” Aaron points at him, “She said and I quote ‘I love it when you use that big ol sexy brain of yours.’ the last time you had her on speaker phone!” he uses a slightly more…effeminate voice when he impersonates Dan but FF had spoken with Dan and to his memory she did not sound like that.

“Fuck you’re right she deserves an all rounder!” Matt cries, head in his hands.

“Why do I even have to TAKE this Gen-Ed about history?” Nicky demands now holding onto FF as if he were a teddy bear.

“So that we’re well-rounded individuals with a wider perspective on-”

“Smithy, my sweet child, I was not looking for an answer.” he feels Nicky’s hand come up to his hair and maybe he’s being treated more like a favored pet?

“You’re having trouble with a Gen-Ed?!” Aaron asks turning around in his seat, “That’s embarrassing.” he turns his nose up.

“I’m having trouble with something that is going to be useless in my adult life.” Nicky says as if he were not currently an adult. “You are having issues with a class that will have huge ramifications on your future if you don’t manage to learn it!” Nicky points out.

“Eat my shorts Nicky.” Aaron hisses.

“Maybe I could study if you would wash your shorts Aaron. I can smell your laundry pile from over here!” Matt spits.

The fight devolved from there and FF slipped out of the dorm as Nicky was holding a chair over his head to seemingly throw at Matt for his ‘unreasonable number of sticky notes messing up the flow of Nicky’s studying’.

He heard a crash.

“It’s probably fine.” he says to himself and he has his index cards with the speech he has to give for and he really should go over to talk with Captain Neil.

He walks to Captain Neil, Andrew, and Kevin’s door and- “There faster-!”

FF walks away from Captain Neil, Andrew, and Kevin’s door, remembering only in this moment that Kevin had declared that he would be “Living in the library until this paper is done or I am.” to the team at the last practice of the year.

Captain Neil and Andrew were never the type to waste an empty dorm room.

He misses Pepto Bismol as he hears a particularly dirty line of Russian coming from his Captain’s dorm room.

***

Eventually Finals week is done and dusted with only 4-5 more blow-ups in his dorm room that result in Nicky, Aaron, and Matt stopping their fight to see if they accidentally had knocked him out with all of the thrown debris (only happened once when Aaron threw a textbook that Nicky ducked but he didn’t.)

FF came out of his final…final feeling pretty good all around. He had managed to get some extra tutoring time with Captain Neil after Kevin managed to finish his history paper a little early. Despite all of their fears and complaints Aaron, Nicky, and Matt all did manage to pass all of their finals and their classes.

The Tower was closing tomorrow for the rest of the year and despite checking almost every day with Nicky he still was invited to go to New York City with most of the team to stay at Allison’s house.

“Smithy, did you pack a swimsuit?” Nicky asks.

“Nicky, we’re going to New York for Christmas break. Do you think we’re going to swim?” Aaron asks incredulously.

“Two words, my fetus of a cousin: Hot. Tub.” Nicky holds his hand up and putting one finger up and then another. “Is hot tub two words?” Matt asks as he reaches for his own swim trunks.

“Yes Matt hot tub is two words.” FF says nodding.

“Thank you Smithster.” Matt says.

“I can’t believe you don’t know that hot tub is two words.” Aaron says with a huff.

“I can’t believe that you don’t know how to not be an asshole even after you started getting regular sex with Katelyn.” Matt returns, “Look at how not a thing that was when Smithster answered it.” he gestures to FF.

“You cannot compare Smithy to Aaron. Apples and Tomatoes.” Nicky dismisses.

“Whatever, so Allison got a hot tub at her place?” Aaron moves past the conversation.

“Aaron you just made fun of Matt for asking stupid questions.” Nicky says with a hand on his cheek.

“I fucking hate being part of your family.” Aaron says without any real heat.

“Yeah sure.” Nicky says, rolling his eyes and smiling as he saw Aaron packing swim trunks that FF knew he had bought for his cousin.

“Okay, I’ve got the packing list that Allison sent. Do we wanna run through it so that we’re all properly packed?” Matt says holding up his phone.

“Yeah, let’s run through it.” Nicky says with a sigh.

They went through Allison’s provided list twice and then zipped up their suitcases. Smith was going to be driving to the airport with Matt. Neil and Andrew were going to be driving the Maserati up alone while the rest of them were going to be flying up to New York City.

Now onto something that filled FF with far more dread than simply passing tests that determined whether or not he continued to get a free ride in college.

Meeting new people.

NEXT >>

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

[sunnyupsidedown]

Thoughts On: The Sunshine Court

by Nora Sakavic [goodreads]

Aka, if I didn't put myself on a social media blackout, these would have been my live tweets. Spoilers below.

Gosh. What if Jeremy starts to hate Kevin for not doing 'enough' to help Jean. That’d probably hurt him so bad lmao Though I don't really thing Jeremy gives off those vibes. He's too sunny.

Also, now I’m thinking of Jeremy being a very normal kid with a normal background completely unprepared to help someone with absolutely massive amounts of trauma. Like. This kid being like, look at my normal jock life and then suddenly is exposed to the dark underbelly of organized crime.

Like. With Andrew and Neil, Neil was already familiar and Andrew at least is familiar with how bad law enforcement is so it’s all a non-issue. Jeremy though… what’s his story???

Jean over here probably texting with T9 on a flip phone

Which fox uses T9, which one taps the number until it gets to the letter they want, and which one has a phone with a keyboard?

Have I mentioned that I love Renee? I feel like she’s often seen as an uwu good girl Christian. But like. She’s so badass. I think she said it herself that she’s a bad person doing her best to be good and you really get that with the “smile that doesn’t reach her eyes”. Fucking love her.

Okay the uni president thing is actually kind of funny. Because I work in an athletic department and it reminds me of when the president requested access to the team practice schedules so I was in charge of setting up an account in our messaging app with the instructions to grant him access but with absolutely no power to do anything else

Do you think Renee will put "Destabilized Evermore leading to its eventual downfall" on her resume when she applies to the Peace Corps? I know this is not how it works but....

We’re going to see the reaction to Riko’s death from Jean’s POV!!! I wrote a ficlet about this!! It’s gonna be so cool to see what really happens!!

Wtf Jean’s 19?!?!

I'm saying this like everything that happened to him wouldn't have been just as horrifying if he were Kevin's age. But like. WTF??? He's Neil's age!!

LMAO everyone wants to choke Kevin out

“You were injured in a scrimmage” DAMN. I did not expect that from Abby. She's so done with Jean's evasions

I was being kind of mean to Kevin earlier and now I’m going to cry. He was just doing his best too :( what can you do when you’ve been raised in the system?

Kevin, Neil, and Jean are in the idiot exy trio

It’s so fascinating to know that this was the version where Jean lived because you can see the parts where his life could have ended. Like if Abby left the pills. If Jean made it back to Evermore. If Wymack didn’t threaten Tetsuji.

The way that they’re (Neil is) playing 5D exy mafia chess is so extra 😭

Everyone really looking to Neil for their courage. Neil was brave so I can be brave (or at least follow him). What would Neil do?

Do you think the other exy coaches know exy was built on blood? Or at least that Evermore was?

Jean and Kevin in the corner at the party full of Ravens: They don’t know the extent of Riko’s violence

I’m starting to realize that Jean is a lover... [Redacted: This is getting it's own post because I have feelings about this.]

JEREMY!! HELLO!! I DON'T KNOW YOU. ARE YOU DEPRESSING TOO?

Jeremy is so normal. This is going to be so good. He’s literally going to be like “why did you say it like that? You know that’s fucked up right?” Call it like it is my dude!!

How the hell did they get the seniors on board with a smaller line up? They’re giving up a chance at a championship run... Ah.

Oh. He’s rich?? Jeremy is rich? With a butler? Is he secretly going to be tied to the west coast mafia? And taking Jean on will create a bond between east and west?

OH HE’S POLITICIAN RICH. Damn. You know there's blood money somewhere

Are you telling me that the sunshine court is a nickname between Kevin and Jean (and maybe some others? I don't remember if it was ever mentioned in the other books) for USC? And it’s typically called the Gold Court? Cause if so, they’re soooo starved

Do you think Jean knows (or remembers) how to use money? Since he’s been locked up in the Nest for so long? How many social norms has he forgotten? How awkward is he going to be relearning them?

Oh god. Jean found out from Jeremy! Holy shit I was not expecting that. Damn. Also. He's alone :(

Renee and Jean 😭

I’m so glad they talked about redshirting. I was SO confused why they could go five years when the rule is 5 years to compete 4 seasons.

Radiology equipment in their exy stadium?? Man I forget how rich some schools are

Watch Jean break out in hives the moment he gets on clothes that are outside the monochrome color scheme

Oooo Jeremy, show me your spine. I want to see him mad. I want to see him lose control.

And then I forgot I was taking notes because I was too absorbed. When is the next book supposed to come out again?

[rainbow-femme]

I just. I’m never going to understand Kevin’s happy ending being that he ends up with Thea

Thea, who shows up after Kevin makes the terrifying decision to announce part of the abuse he suffered on television in a way that for the first time directly implicates his abuser, and is speaking in a way Neil describes as “angry and mocking” about what Kevin just did

Kevin says “If you’re going to believe me, you need to see Jean first” and Thea does not deny needing to be convinced. Meaning the implication is that Thea is fully aware of the extent of abuse the normal Ravens dealt with, and when hearing that her ex who escaped in the middle of the night did so because of a severe injury given to him by a teammate her reaction is to show up and need to be given a reason to believe him, the abuse victim, and she’s clearly angry at him the entire time she’s demanding evidence of his abuse

There also is an implication with how she talks that she is angry Kevin did not tell her these things himself, even though, again, her reaction was to get angry at Kevin and need to be given a reason to believe he actually was abused

And it’s been confirmed that Thea will always view herself as a Raven, the thing Kevin risked his life to escape, and that she views Kevin’s life of abuse as “no harm no foul” because the abuser died and the horrific physical and mental injuries didn’t stop him from playing the sport

I just. How is that a good ending for Kevin? That he escaped an abusive cult and spends the rest of his life with someone still connected to the cult who views the direct abuse he got from the cult leader as basically a wash because he’s still playing the sport and the cult leader is dead now?

I mean just have it be like Allison or Renee where he marries a woman he meets after the books end, someone who represents the future he chose and not the abusive past he had to endure and then escape. I just don’t see how him ending up with someone who thinks the cult he barely escaped from with his life was ultimately not that bad and she’s proud to have been a part of it is in any way happy for him.

It just feels like Kevin is never actually going to be able to escape his past and he’s going to spend his life with someone skeptical of his experiences after spending years with the Foxes and specifically Andrew whose views are “you are never at fault for what other people did to you, you can always move forward, it’s never too late to leave and be happy, there will always be someone who can see what happened to you and believe the best of you and want to support you moving forward”

Why make him a fan of the Trojans, whose culture is the exact opposite of the Ravens, and not at least pair him off with someone there? Have one of the women they play against in that game approach him with compassion like Renee does to Jean? Suggest that she’s happy to support him in any way he needs and then show him calling her a few times in the background of other scenes?

Also the extra content I just

Kevin keeps an apartment right near the place he was abused his whole life

He has a daughter he forces to play Exy even though she doesn’t want to, that she views it as being forced into a life she never wanted but ultimately it’s fine because she meets their expectations. Like that just sounds like Kevin physically and mentally goes back to the place he was in before and does to his kid some of what was done to him, that he makes his child so miserable she becomes an “emotional nightmare” but it’s written off as fine because she plays well, similar to how Kevin having no choice in life and being treated horrifically was ok because it made him play well

[lostintheuniverseslies]

Fic Master Post for AFTG and 9-1-1

AFTG

Trying My Best

Rated E ● 75,271 Words ● 20 Chapters ● Pairing: Neil/Andrew ● Part 1 of a Series ● Finished

“You refuse to talk to Bee. If today was any indication, I’d say you cannot afford to continue going on without talking to her.” “I’m not talking to her,” Neil said resolutely. “Then we’re at an impasse. I will not waste my time worrying about a rabbit who will neither call me nor see a therapist for his problems.” Basically Neil and Andrew figure out how to help each other through the good and bad days.

Safe Zone

Rated G ●  3,062 Words ● 1 Chapter ● Pairing: Neil/Andrew ● Part 2 of a Series ● Finished

Andrew wakes up with a fever but like the hard headed shit he is, he tries to power through it. Nothing goes as planned and he finds a begrudging comfort in Neil.

Stay With Me

Rated E ●  97,333 Words ● 21 Chapters ● Pairing: Neil/Andrew ● Part 3 of a Series ● Finished

Neil had let Andrew say goodbye to every important person left in Palmetto while he stood on the sidelines and cheered Andrew on. There was only one goodbye left and it would be the most painful one. It seemed as though it was finally hitting Neil too. They only had twenty-seven days together and then Neil would return to Palmetto alone for the first time since Millport. -They spent the first year after everything healing. Now they have to learn how to navigate being away from each other while Andrew is off playing in the pros and Neil is still at Palmetto finishing his fifth year. Things aren't easy. They never seem to be for them but they're fighters. And they always come out on top.-

Three Steps

Rated M ●  33,033 Words ● 3 Chapters ● Pairing: Neil/Andrew ● Finished

After Mary died, Neil went to the FBI and helped them take down not only Nathan and his inner circle but also the Moriyama family. Now free to do as he pleases, he decided that he wants some normal life experiences. What better way to accomplish that than to enroll at Palmetto University. He doesn't expect to find friendship in his roommates and definitely doesn't expect to fall for the man who sits in the corner of the café with blades under his armbands and hair that shines like a halo in the sun.

If Only I Were Enough

Rated M ●  50,970 Words ● 15 Chapters ● Pairing: Neil/Andrew ● Finished

After Andrew moves to Colorado to start his professional Exy career, he intends on everything being okay between him and Neil. But when his self-destructive tendencies tell him that he doesn't need Neil Josten in his life, everything goes to shit. Things between them seem unrepairable and he's not so sure he wants to even try. But when Neil gets into a dangerous car wreck, Andrew finds himself back at the junkie's side with a deadline to fix things or walk away forever.

Somebody's Watching Me

Rated G ●  4,960 Words ● 1 Chapter ● Pairing: Neil/Andrew ● Finished

It's October and the monsters are out shopping when they come across a very creepy doll. Neil decides to have some fun with it by scaring Nicky at every corner.

Monsters, Friends, and Candy

Rated G ●  3,211 Words ● 1 Chapter ● Pairing: None ● Finished

Bee has spent the last two years hoping that she was doing good by Andrew and Aaron. Hoping that she had done a decent enough job that they truly believed they were safe and loved by her. She gets her answer when she overhears Andrew comforting a scared Neil.

Nothing Mattered Until You

Rated M ●  22,497 Words ● 5 Chapters ● Pairing: Neil/Jean ● Finished

On the docks in Marseille, Neil fell in love. But his mother ripped him away and for years he never dared hope to see Jean again. He believed that he would die before ever getting the chance. But when recuperating with his uncle after his father is killed, Neil's chance comes. Unfortunately, he isn't the only one who went through some horrible things over the years. Despite their horrible pasts, they decide to try for a future together. Going to college and even making some friends along the way. But Riko has other plans and wants back what he considers his.

A Quiet Little Seedling

Rated E ●  83,293 Words ● 15 of 30 Chapters ● Pairing: Neil/Andrew ● Ongoing

Neil had a lot of secrets. He didn’t want much in life except to live quietly, run his botanical store, upload TikToks covering plant care, and for not a single person to find out that he’s the best-selling author N.A.J who published one book anonymously five years prior and disappeared. His life takes a turn when his literary agent tracks him down for a follow-up book with the theme of feeling settled and at peace. Two things Neil is not. Thus begins his journey of planting roots in a town he’s lived in for years, starting with making friends with people who have tried to bring him into their circle. As Neil gets closer to them and his secrets become less guarded, there’s still that one big secret he intends on taking to his grave. But the closer he gets to his friends the closer he unknowingly gets to that secret being revealed.

9-1-1

Right in Front of You This Whole Time

Rated E ●  14,992 Words ● 1 Chapter ● Pairing: Buck/Tommy & Buck/Eddie ● Finished

Buck enjoys figuring out his sexuality with Tommy. Everything is good, almost too easy, and when Buck comes out to everyone in his life, he's not expecting the silence from Eddie. It doesn't last long, not when its seems accidentally hurting someone out of jealously on a basketball court isn't strictly a Buck thing. Now everything Buck felt toward his best friend in the past was making a lot more sense.

What Was I Made For

Rated G ●  2,410 Words ● 1 Chapter ● Pairing: Buck/Tommy ● Finished

After the disaster that was the bachelor party, Chimney was found alive though things could have been better. Buck feels guilty about what happened though he knows he had no control over it and it was no ones fault. His mother, however, blames him and Daniel gets thrown in his face once again. It's no surprise that no one stays for Buck and he expects Tommy to leave after seeing the blow up with his parents but Tommy proves that maybe there is someone who will stay.

I'll Be Lying Awake Counting All My Mistakes

Rated T ●  13,627 Words ● 4 Chapters ● Pairing: Buck/Tommy ● Ongoing

After being given the option to transfer or keep Buck at the 118, Bobby decides on the former. Believing he has failed Buck in some way, Bobby hopes the kid might learn his actions have consequences. Buck’s new firehouse is the 217 and Bobby reaches out to Tommy with a request: look after Buck. Tommy’s not sure what to expect but it certainly wasn’t falling head over hills for the man he's supposed to be looking after. Meanwhile Buck is struggling with Bobby’s decision and not feeling good enough. Not to mention he doesn’t understand why he gets butterflies around Tommy so much. It can only be admiration, right?

6am Happiness

Rated G ●  2,339 Words ● 1 Chapters 1● Pairing: Buck/Tommy ● Finished

They were supposed to sleep in late but Buck woke up thinking about the future.

[darkblueboxs]

Hi 💙!! I’m not sure if you’re still answering asks and I don’t want to be too much of a nuisance but i just NEEDED to let you know how much I appreciate you （╹◡╹）♡

(First of all, in advance I want to apologise for me rumbling so much, I hope what i wrote makes sense)

I have been on the internet for many years now and I can proudly say that I’ve read some of the best works in my entire life here; out of all of these incredible writers I’ve found, you are truly my favourite- I absolutely adore your writing, have read every single one of your fics and often reread my favourite ones to cheer myself up when I’m feeling down (sometimes I wish I could forget them so that I could read them for the first time again hah, I don’t know how to describe this feeling)

My absolute favourite work of yours is “The Sphinx and the Hare” (I wish it was infinitely longer simply because then it would have no end and I could read it forever and ever; I could read about andreil’s (and Lexia&Fìrinn’s) day to day lives for the rest of mine because the way you tell your stories is so compelling and phenomenal I just can’t, won’t, don’t want to stop reading). I cannot tell you how much I love love love this fic. The amount of time you spent writing this work is visible in the thought put behind even the smallest of details. From the very well written dialogue, interactions between characters (especially Andrew, Neil and their daemons), and Neil’s inner thought process to the so on point characterisation of every single one of the characters and amazing descriptions of the world in this AU, characters’ actions and their overall being. I want to call it a testament to how good of a writer you are- you make readers feel everything the character is feeling right alongside them and that shows how much of hard work you put into perfecting the skill of writing

THANK YOU for sharing your terrific works, clever and funny thoughts and memes (here on tumblr, on ao3 and twitter) for free in your own free time; you are a blessing if I can say so myself :DD

And what is there more to say- you are incredible <3333 Hope you have a great day!!

PS. If it’s okay (and of course feel free not to if you don’t want to answer) I would love to know how you think andreil and their daemons are doing now- maybe they’re in Columbia cuddled up on the sofa watching sth on the TV? Or maybe they’re on a road trip somewhere having some time to themselves? Or maybe they’re in their dorm quietly enjoying each other’s company?; either way I hope both Fìrinn and Lexia get some pats and cuddles i love them with all of my heart 🥹❤️

Hi! 💞💞💞 I am still answering asks, I'm just incredibly bad at it 😭

You're an absolute joy, you've made me want to get back to writing more than anything has in a loooong time

(one day, maybe, when the exhaustion abates)

It has been so long since I last looked over my daemon au, so forgive me if I contradict my own canon!

Lexia has discovered play fighting, which mostly means launching herself from beneath the bunk to nip Neil's toes when he swings his legs out of bed in the morning. Neil pretends to be annoyed- only for Lexia's satisfaction - but it's ticklish more than anything. (The morning Lexia trips Neil over on his way to the bathroom is the closest Andrew comes to showing signs of amusement)

Fìrinn likes to sit on Andrew's chest when he's lying on the couch and drum her feet on his sternum until Andrew shoves her off. Whenever exy comes on she gets a major case of zoomies unless Neil or Andrew can catch her- although neither consider it worth the effort. Lexia prefers to sit herself on the TV stand at inopportune moments to block everyone's view of the screen, particularly on penalties and overtime, and especially if Kevin is watching. She is still, at heart, an instigator.

More nights than not, Fìrinn falls asleep curled around Lexia or vice versa, and inevitably Neil or Andrew will follow their daemon into the others' bunk. On these nights, and only these nights, safe and surrounded, Lexia will sleep.

[gaypomegranate]

Quotes that remind me of Andreil: 

Neil: 

“Like any unloved thing, I don’t know if I’m real when I’m not being touched.” (Natalie Wee) 

Thinking in the context of Neil’s life living in Baltimore, going on the run, playing with the foxes, falling for Andrew, etc. While he may not like all touch, or is hesitant to it, he is grounded by the touch he experiences, both the good (His touches with Andrew, “Yes or no?”, the ruffling of his hair from Matt, the casual touches from the team he slowly grows more accustomed to) and the bad. (The abuse from his father, Lola’s knives, his mother’s tugging of his hair and hard hands, Riko’s violence) 

Andrew: 

“I wept and wept. I had come to believe that if I really wanted something badly enough, the very act of my wanting it was an assurance that I would not get it.” (Audre Lorde)

I associate this one with Andrew more so in his earlier years, in the years in which so much was taken from him he had to learn to give up his needs and wants for survival. His continued denial of his wants in reference to his growing relationship with Neil due to the fear he has of losing the little he does want, much like what had happened in the past. 

Neil:

“I was so alone that every day was like eating my own heart.” (Junot Diaz)

Makes sense throughout the majority of his life, but is specifically relating to the period he spent truly alone for the first time after losing his mom. His loneliness and bone crushing fatigue of trying to keep going, keep running, to stay lost, keep away from the very little he has. (Exy) Past tense because he has grown and found a home and people he cares about who care about him. Found a home in Andrew and given him his heart to hold. 

Andrew: 

“Where can my lovers touch me when all of me hurts? Certainly not my body. Certainly not my heart.” (Molly Burton)

Obviously connecting to Andrew’s trauma. I was thinking about this in terms of him and Neil, in his refusal to think of their relationship as anything more than “nothing” (at least at first), his need for control and fear of giving up what little he does have due to having it be taken from him so much. Obviously he outgrows this, at least to an extent, (I like to think his need for control always stays but overtime evolves and changes) but I think of this as a internal background thought in his mind, an insecurity he had to learn to overcome through his trust in Neil. 

[sweeterthanyou-blog]

i’ve had this aftg hc/fic stewing in my head for a while and I’m not much of a writer so I’m gonna lay it out here instead :)

setting the scene:

- it’s christmas-time during Neil’s sophomore year at psu. the year had a rocky start but with their win against the ravens and their return to the court in the fall, Neil has settled into this new life quite nicely

- this year, in an effort to make up for Andrew and Neil’s absence last year, the upperclassmen (along with Nicky) arrange a secret Santa among the foxes, to be given at a final fox dinner at abbeys the first night of winter break (before everyone goes their separate ways for the holidays)

- someone (probably Nicky) arranges it so Neil has Andrew because why not

now some gritty stuff:

- Neil doesn’t like the holidays. He usually thinks nothing of it, but this year the foxes are determined to celebrate the holidays. Despite all this cheer, Neil has a Bad Day (tm) beginning at the exy winter banquet that won’t go away.

- he tries to hide it, and is mostly successful as the foxes assume it’s purely memories of the previous year and his time at castle evermore resurfacing

- while this definitely is contributing to Neil’s overall declining mental state, there’s more to it

- during his early childhood, the Wesninski household didn’t celebrate Christmas (it was a busy time of the year for Nathan and he didn’t care to indulge in happy holiday celebrations). Neil, knowing no better, didn’t notice

- until he begins kindergarten (as an Aussie I hope that’s the correct US term). he learns all about the wonders of Christmas, he makes friends who whisper excitedly what they hope to get from Santa. On the last day before winter break, his whole class is allowed to watch a Christmas movie and colour in (all round the best day of his life)

- he goes home, ready to demand that they celebrate the holiday, interrupts his father during important business, Nathan proceeds to teach his son a lesson, and from then on Nathaniel is homeschooled and the thought of Christmas doesn’t cross his mind again.

- until he is ten years old. he’s at the age where he spends as much of his free time outside as he can, despite the cold. what he really wants is to play a sport, a way to release all his pent up energy (that does NOT include knives). Nathan, unusually happy, surprises Nathaniel one day. An early Christmas present, he exclaims. Nathaniel will begin in the Exy little leagues. Nathaniel is taken aback, but inside is a tiny spark of hope. He falls in love with exy, plays with Kevin Day and Riko. He and his mother run away. While on the run Christmas becomes once again just another thing he can never have.

- basically Christmas = bad memories

- this year, Neil knows Christmas will be different. The foxes make it mean something. But the bad days aren’t ending. It’s making him restless. Which scares him. He doesn’t want to be a rabbit anymore, and yet he can feel his body itching to grab his duffle bag and run.

- he manages to bottle everything down until the first day of winter break. That night, presents will be exchanged, but with all his mental battles Neil has yet to find something for Andrew.

-Andrew, who has been the only thing holding Neil up for so long. Andrew, who Neil knows can sense that something is off, but who respects Neil enough to give him space until he is ready.

- until today. Andrew finds Neil on the roof after a particularly long run. Lights a cigarette and stares at Neil.

- they have their heart to heart. Neil “self-sabotage” Josten finally opens his eyes and stops bottling down his emotions. Andrew told him to stay and he will.

- though there is one last thing he has to do first. It’s almost time to head to abbeys, but Neil tells Andrew he’ll meet him there.

- of course Neil arrives late to the party, drinking is in full swing, Nicky is wearing an awful Christmas sweater, presents are on a table ready for secret Santa.

- Neil finds Andrew outside by the fire, cigarette in hand, waiting for him. He hands over the gift in his hands.

- Andrew, curious as ever, opens it to find Neil’s binder.

- Neil’s binder, which contained everything he needed while on the run, fake ids, numbers for his mothers contacts, (everything you need to know about Kevin and Riko), minus all the money safely tucked away back in their dorm.

-Neil and his way with words: “this was all I had on the run, and I don’t need it anymore” it’s a promise that though he will have bad days, will feel jittery and as though his only option is to run, he won’t. Because Andrew told him to stay and because Neil wants to stay.

- he tells Andrew to toss it in the fire. Andrew rolls his eyes and goes to give it back. He doesn’t need this kind of promise, he already knows. But Neil asks again.

- Andrew gives in, tosses it in the fire and that’s that. They go back inside, join the foxes, and Neil experiences his first real Christmas with his family :))

[void-and-virtue]

Neil as a team captain is positively delightful, because making him captain is both absolutely insane and absolutely brilliant. It capitalizes on the passive effect of having one (1) Neil Josten (god knows the world couldn’t handle if there were more of him) on the team in the most efficient way. Like. I’m 90% sure that after spending some time around him on the same team, most people will look up to him completely awestruck for how much he has impacted their lives, but that’s just not what is actually happening here. I feel like what’s going on is this:

Neil is a terribly amazing choice for team captain entirely because Neil is a meddlesome little asshole who will forcibly fix all of his teammates’ personal problems and improve their entire lives for literally no other reason than that he needs them to be able to focus on fucking ball so he can win at sports. It’s not even that he genuinely cares about people and their well-being (apart from his original foxes). He just gets pissed when things aren’t working properly because it makes Exy annoying when the lineup can’t communicate. Exy isn’t supposed to be annoying. Exy is life. He’d meddle whether he is captain or not, but by making him captain, he has so much more official executive power at his hands. It’s like people are explicitly asking for him to do his worst. So, fueled by his own competitiveness and love for the sport, off he goes.

Neil is just as bad as Kevin when it comes to his Exy obsession. The major difference between them is that Kevin is endlessly tactical and he runs Exy with a focus on a technical and physical level entirely, whereas Neil’s approach is to look beyond a lack of practice and basically psychoanalyzing people on why they are not doing 110% for Exy. Kevin says “let’s run this drill 500 times, then we will inevitably be better”. Meanwhile Neil is scheming how to coerce and bribe people into life-changing decisions and long-needed healing, entirely because he wants to optimize playing a sport. Exy is a team sport, which is why this is the most logical approach his little Exy brain comes up with rather than minding his own fucking business. He looks at the team and is like “is anyone gonna whip this into shape? No?? I’ll fucking do it then cowards” and goes and does exactly that. It’s like he’s fixing the equipment so he can play.

I don’t think anyone except for Andrew is really aware that Neil really isn’t doing this out of the innate goodness of his heart, but because his personal brand of practicality involves the most convoluted and creative kind of scheming. I feel like Neil is a lot more selfish than people give him credit for. Sure, there’s people he cares deeply and unconditionally for, but that’s really not everyone. It’s fascinating to watch, especially because it’s not like he ever hides that he doesn’t particularly care, but people kinda assume he does, because why else would he put in this much effort?

Exy. The answer is Exy.

[liveyourlastbreath]

Neil Josten’s adventures in Exy as an (unwilling) Amputee (PT3)

Holy cow the response to this au has been amazing, thank you all so much!

Riko saunters onto the stage like the bitch that he is (i hate him very much)

because this is my au and I can do what I want, when Kevin sits back down basically on top of Neil, Neil has an out-of-character moment and grabs Kevin’s fist that is crushed between their bodies, hoping that it’s enough to keep him from bolting live on air

Riko and Neil are just that one meme, ya know, the one

Somehow this conversation also happens, and Neil seriously considers taking up Wymacks idea of beating someone over the head with his leg

Kathy: So Riko, what are your opinions on Neil being the first amputee playing in Class 1 Exy? 

Riko: I think it makes the Foxes more of a joke than they already are.

Kathy: So you think it’s a bad idea

Riko: I think it’s a risk

Neil: I mean we already have Kevin, what was it I was saying about starting over from the gutters? 

Neil is really tempted to bring his leg up between Riko’s when he’s slammed against the wall.

Riko: I don’t approve of cripples, Kevin. You need to get rid of him as soon as possible, save the little dignity your team has left.

Kevin: He has potential, you saw him last night. He played just as well as any of them.

Riko turning on Kevin is Neil’s last straw, because I’d like to think in this au, their hand and leg bring them closer together faster, they really do understand what it’s like to start over, to relearn something everyone else has known since birth

So he grabs Riko’s shirt and throws him back harder than in cannon. Meaner than in the book because he’s beyond caring about his own safety, and he just really wants to hit something

Riko slams into Neil and sends him tripping into wires, tangling up his leg and making it impossible to get away. Neil’s hands are already clawing off his leg when Riko pulls back to swing

And then Andrew is there with Neil’s now detached leg, the sole of the shoe backing him away from Kevin and Neil. Neil is up on his foot and away from Riko as soon as he can find his balance hopping on his one foot

Andrew doesn’t give Neil back his leg, so aids are watching as Kevin holds up a hopping Neil as they get back to the team. 

“The fuck did your leg go?” “I think Andrews using it as a bat”

Andrew passes it back to Neil with a lingering touch and a bored expression. No blood on the foot, that’s a good thing, doesn’t explain why Andrew’s touch lingered or why there’s goosebumps on Neil’s back

Neil eventually walks into the mess that is the cousins’ room, glass everywhere and Neil is increasingly concerned about how it could have ruined Andrew’s goalie abilites. 

“What would it take to make you stay?” “What?” “Name it and it’s yours, I’m not above hiding all your little legs until I get an answer.” 

So they go to Columbia again

Neil's no longer a rabbit

Neil takes off his contacts, gives them a little more of whoever was hiding behind the scar tissue of his life

Neil and Andrew start their game again, and Neil gives him bits, asking Andrew for protection against his father

The truth hurt, if he was being honest. It burned like the scars on his leg were fresh, sounded like his father's cleaver against his own bone

"He already took my leg. If he finds me, he will kill me." "Not a car crash then?" "Called it a lesson, never planned on letting me go but I got away anyways." "What a mess."

And then Neil gets shoved into Andrew's side, and all he can think about is how Andrew can hold him up. How he's nothing like his mother, who never held him up for anything other than to run.

Andrew was holding him up and telling him to stay, that meant more than his mother ever did.

Kevin and Neil find themselves alone at the table later in the night, and is to drunk to keep his mouth shut

Kevin: You were going to hit him, with your leg.

Neil: Andrew beat me to it

Kevin: Would you?

Neil: Wish I had, we could all bond over being cripples together.

Neil: Did my talent catch my eye or was it my leg

Kevin: Both. But your leg doesn't define how well you play. You learned a new sport on one leg. A lot of people couldn't say the same.

Kevin: (beat) We can do this

Neil: You're wasted

Kevin: If I didn't think you could do it I wouldn't have fought for you

Neil: You're learning on your right and relearning on the left.

Kevin: I guess cripples like to stick together

And that was the end of it, they ignored each other after that

Seth overdosed right about then, Neil didn't get it, understand how someone could actively want to die when his entire life had been about survival

He could have curled up and died at his father's feet that night, he didn't

Even Andrew's hand at his neck couldn't soothe the confusion and fear that came with a the realization; Seth's death was planned

Neil hated Andrew already knew him, knew the look in his eyes that told him to run

So he pressed a key into Neil's hand and went inside.

Home, that's what Andrew had called it. Home.

Neil wasn't sure if this was some kind of joke, a dream or a nightmare. He hoped he never found out.

PART ONE || PART TWO || PART THREE || PART FOUR

[high-queen-of-the-court]

The Foxes Reading Mean Tweets

Neil, reading tweet: “A lot of people I know have Neil Josten syndrome. They are judgmental, unreasonable, two-faced... oh wait. These are all of the qualities of a bitch.”

Neil: At least with my bitch-iness i have more personality than you

Kevin, reading tweet: “Kevin Day always acts so tough and like he’s the shit. I bet he can’t even open a pickle jar.”

Kevin: I can’t open a pickle jar because I waste my strength trying to keep my team from killing each other on the court. I’m not acting tough. I just have a bad case rbf.

Andrew, reading tweet: “I love how people can inspire you to go all kinds of places. Like when I’m in a restaurant and they start showing an exy game with Andrew Minyard playing so I go to another restaurant.” 

Andrew: I bet the servers wanted you to leave anyways.

Matt, reading tweet: “Matt Boyd looks so cheap. I bet he does’t even pay his bus fees.”

Matt: You don’t have to pay bus fees when you’re riding a sports tour bus.

Dan, reading tweet: “No hate to Danielle Wilds, but she seems like a pick me girl...”

Dan: Yeah, I’m not like other girls. I was the first female captain of a class I collegiate exy team.

Aaron, reading tweet: “I bet Andrew would trade Aaron for one foot massage.”

Aaron: Can I get a tweet that’s not from Andrew?

Nicky, reading tweet: “Nicky Hemmick shouldn’t be on a college exy team. I mean, he just slipped through the cracks and we said, ‘Whatever.’”

Nicky: I’m literally just here for the scholarship *cough* and drama *cough*.

Allison, reading tweet: “Allison Reynolds only plays exy for attention.”

Allison: I must be really dedicated, you know, considering my team won the finals last year.

Renee: There’s no tweets for me? 

BONUS:

Jean, reading tweet: “I bet Jean Moreau’s feet smell like a moldy baguette.”

Jean, takes shoe off and sniffs foot: Smells like success and depression to me. 

Jeremy, off camera: NO!

[jingerhead]

Hi idk if you’re accepting prompts but if you are would you write something with the concept of Cassandra!Andrew? Like Andrew being cursed like Cassandra of Troy to see the future but no one believing his warnings?

Oh my god this concept just makes me want to sob. Like, imagine Andrew knowing about Neil being taken, trying to warn him, and Neil the stupid martyr that he is just tries to play it cool so that Andrew isn’t getting involved. Andrew knowing about EVERYTHING before it comes to pass? The ANGST POTENTIAL? I had to write just a little something for this, I hope you enjoy it anon oh my god.

This is just such a good concept I love it, you don’t have to restrict it in canon either - we could jump to something like fantasy!!! (my favorite I’m sorry but also not) We need more 'Andrew reading the future' fics I need them JSJS

~*~

Most of the visions Andrew had came at the worst of times. Case in point: it was time to get back on the bus to Binghamton, and he could feel a headache coming on already. He didn’t focus on the fact that Kevin had wandered off to talk to Dan and instead headed towards the back, where he could work through the upcoming vision in peace. He sat down on the cushioned bench and crossed his arms, the headache growing more painful with each passing second, until his vision went white.

The first thing that Andrew saw was himself on the court. He was watching the game unfold across the field, the large clock ticking down in the second half. It didn’t last long, suddenly shifting to the team heading towards the locker rooms in good spirits, the rush of noise something Andrew didn’t pay attention to as he looked around, as though searching. He didn’t find what he was looking for by the time the vision shifted, melting into a different hallway, one where Andrew was staring at Neil.

The look on Neil’s face was something almost indescribable. A strange relaxation despite the clear tension in his jaw, the way his eyebrows were drawn up as though in sadness or pain, and the glossiness in his dark blue eyes. But the thing that caught Andrew off guard the most was the smile Neil was wearing - he could count on two hands the number of times he remembered Neil smiling as though he couldn’t help it, like he was genuinely happy and the upwards turn of his lips showed it. This wasn’t one of those times. This smile was different.

Then, Neil opened his mouth. “Thank you,” he said, voice quiet but not a whisper. “You were amazing.”

The vision shifted again. This time, Andrew found himself standing in a rioting crowd, unable to duck in time to avoid an elbow tossed back towards his face. He barely felt the sharp stab of pain.

And then it shifted again, only this time Andrew was running through a mostly empty parking lot, looking around frantically. He spotted some orange towards his right, so he ran to it, freezing when he saw it was a duffle bag and exy racket. One Andrew knew could only belong to one person. He knelt down and looked at it: at the way it had been dropped on its side to display the ‘JOSTEN: 10’ towards the darkened sky. Neil never went anywhere without his duffle bag. He wouldn’t have left it behind if his life depended on it.

Andrew stood up and looked around one last time, still holding onto the long strap attached to the duffle. “Neil!” he screamed into the empty parking lot.

Very suddenly, Andrew was back in the present moment, headache fading away. He blinked a few times, heart pounding as though he’d actually been running. Every single one of Andrew’s visions came to pass eventually, even if nobody else believed them. This would be no different, and like the other times, Andrew was being warned. Something bad was going to happen tonight, something that would make Neil leave behind his duffle bag and force Andrew to run around the parking lot shouting for him.

“Andrew?”

If he was anyone else, Andrew probably would’ve jumped. Instead, he just let his breath go and looked up to see Neil leaning over the back of the seat in front of his, arms crossed and staring. There seemed to be a hint of concern in his eyes, though this wasn’t the first time Neil had caught him mid-vision.

Instead of playing it cool, like Andrew had been doing ever since he realized nobody would ever, ever believe his words, Andrew sat up straighter. If there was ever the outlier, Neil Josten had proved himself that he would be it. “Listen,” Andrew hissed, making sure to keep his voice quiet. “Something is going to happen tonight.”

Neil nodded. “Okay?”

“After the game, there will be a riot,” Andrew continued. “Stay close to me.”

For a brief second, Andrew thought a spark of understanding flashed through Neil’s eyes. He tricked himself into thinking that Neil was going to believe him, and was going to say ‘yes’ like he had been doing. But instead, Neil seemed to close himself off. “How do you know that?” he asked.

“Don’t deflect,” Andrew said. Neil would take the chance to deflect every second he could, even if the question was warranted at the moment. 

“Did you see something?” Neil pushed.

“Yes,” Andrew said, enjoying the flash of surprise that went through Neil’s eyes. “People are going to get hurt and go missing. It’ll be a handful enough keeping track of Kevin.”

“Just keep track of him,” Neil said, completely nonchalant. 

“Don’t make me go looking for you,” Andrew said. It was almost a plea.

“Then let me go,” Neil replied, like it was easy. To someone who didn’t know the future, it probably was. “Stand with me, but don’t fight for me. Let me learn to fight for myself.”

The immediate answer Andrew had was a resounding ‘no’. Not after what he’d seen, and especially not with Neil Josten. Though he didn’t have the details, it was clear that Neil did, and he wasn’t going to do any fighting at all. He was being his typical, suicidal martyr self.

Should Andrew have expected anything different?

“Give me a reason to think you’re capable,” Andrew said.

“You wouldn’t have let me watch over Kevin if you didn’t think that I was.”

“You didn’t watch,” Andrew hissed. “You let yourself be bait. You’re the martyr no one asked for or wanted.”

Neil didn’t seem bothered. Andrew really wished he would be. “Maybe I’m tired of being the bait,” Neil said, voice like a rumble to match the engine of the bus. “Maybe I’m being the martyr again. Only one way to find out, right?”

Andrew felt like he was trying to swallow razor blades. “You’ll regret it,” he warned, the image of Neil’s abandoned duffle bag flashing through his eyes like a reminder.

“Maybe,” Neil said again. Andrew was really starting to hate that word and the face Neil made when he stared. “Maybe not.”

Shoulders slumping, Andrew turned to look out the window and attempted to relax against his seat. Once again, the curse was reminding him just why he only let the future pass instead of trying to interfere with it. “Don’t come crying to me when someone breaks your face.”

“Thank you.”

A spike was driven through Andrew’s chest. He wondered how many hours it would be before he heard those words again.

[aftgficrec]

Hi!! I caught it open and I'm so happy. Thank you guys for you work! I've been reading fics via this platform for a year now and love it!! I was wondering if you guys have any new (or old) sick fics. Or andreil caring for each other when they're sick is my guilty pleasure. Preferably over 10k but I'll take anything really😁 Thank you so much!! 🥰

There are some really excellent long sickfics available, just look at the list of our previous recs below.  We seem to have rec’ed most sickfics over 10k already, but there are plenty of good shorter fics as you can see. - S

From previous posts:

‘Pause and Restart my Heart’, ‘The Bones of You’, ‘let them hear me shout (for you)’ (since updated) here

‘Back to the Start’ here

‘you're not next before forever’ here (now complete)

‘Broken’ here

‘just like that day’ here

‘no straighter path than to struggle’ here

‘Speaking In Silences’ (now complete) here

‘Virus’ here

‘Secondhand Lovers’ (now complete) here

‘and in a flash, it’s gone’ here

‘Muscle memory’ (now complete), ‘The Memories I Never Can Escape’ and ‘last piece of gold’ here

Paint me a picture of you by peachycloudsworld [Rated T, 20525 words, complete, 2022]

After spraining his wrist, Neil is off-court for four weeks. It doesn´t take long for him to start spiraling down. Luckily there´s Andrew and his new interest in painting to keep him afloat. Still, nightmares suck and his wrist is a constant reminder that the yakuza can take him out whenever they want.

[Or: Neil has a bad couple of weeks and Andrew does whatever he can to take care of him.]

tw: panic attacks, tw: homophobia, tw: scars, tw: nightmares

The Songs Around Us by doodlingstuff [Rated M, 14484 words, incomplete, last updated June 2022]

The mission was simple: Nathaniel would join Astral Foxes as Neil Josten and make them part of Moriyama Music.

In reality, Neil became real, found a home, and fell in love despite his lies.

When the Moriyamas send the Butcher to remind Neil of his mission and Andrew's life ends on the line, Neil will have to decide how to escape his fate and bring Andrew back.

Sometimes, music is the only answer, and others, as Neil will realize, truth is the only weapon you have to save the ones you love the most.

tw: car accident, tw: torture, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: panic attacks

There Now, Steady Love by jingerhead [Rated G, 7040 words, complete, 2022]

All it had taken was a broken strap, a helmet flying loose, and a rough push. That was all it took for Neil to feel like his entire life was taken away from him. He could barely remember that one of the things Andrew told him after he’d woken up, caught in a panic because he couldn’t see, was that his uncle had pulled through somehow and he didn’t have to worry. That things were taken care of, and they’d figure it out, together. But Neil’s world still came crashing down piece by piece.

He could never play again.

Due to a sudden head injury, Neil ends up blind and can't play the sport he's built his life around. Andrew teaches him how to again.

Palmetto Plague by ace_astronaut [Rated T, 5899 words, complete, 2022]

“I should tell you to stay in bed,” said Andrew, as Neil’s thoughts were interrupted by a fit of coughing.

“But?” Neil managed through coughs.

“But I know it won’t make a difference because, as we have established, you are both sick and stupid.”

“I promised Dan I’d captain the team while she was gone—”

“Save your voice. I’m not interested in your never-ending Exy excuses.”

With Dan out of town, Neil is promoted to acting captain for their upcoming death match. He’s not going to let something as insignificant as the flu stop him from leading his team to victory.

Andrew is Not Pleased. But he knows better than to try and talk sense into his junkie boyfriend.

I Never Said I Loved You by phan_taloon [Rated T, 5281 words, complete, 2022]

Andrew never learned how to love, never quite learned what loving someone or something means or requires, never knew how loving felt like. After so many fucking years with Neil fucking Josten and their not-nothing, he has no idea if he loves him.

This didn't go in the direction I initially planned and might be the softest thing I've written.

Title from Ripple by Moonfall

tw: car accident, tw: blood

As It Was by Exyshmexy [Rated G, 3088 words, complete, 2022]

Neil gets the flu, Andrew comes to the rescue.

One Hundred by TheRainbowElectric [Not Rated, 4553 words, complete, 2021]

The most shocking thing about the sight of Neil is how still he is.

Andrew has seen Neil bloodied and bruised before. But even beaten to a pulp and beyond exhausted, Neil talks and twitches and kicks in his sleep, restless fucker.

Now, Neil’s only signs of life are the shallow rise and fall of his chest and the steady beep of the heart monitor beside his bed. That’s all Andrew has to hold onto as he drags a chair from beside the window to the gap between Neil’s bed and the door and sits down.

Andrew breaks into Neil's hospital room after Baltimore. (Inspired by this artwork by @himawarrior)

tw: implied/referenced torture

Safe with Neil by Autumnalpalmetto [Rated T, 2392 words, complete, Aftg Winter Exchange 2020]

For JostenLovesMinyard on tumblr

prompt: Andreil, sick with the other looking after them, cuddling in front of a fire, snowball fights, and staying at a winter cabin.

Andrew gets sick on their first night in the cabin, and Neil takes it upon himself to nurse Andrew until he's feeling better.

Art

sick Andrew by @paradoxolotl

more sick Andrew by @paradoxolotl 

how to remedy high fevers by @microolli

Let Neil nap by @crowtoeoe

Injured Andreil by @bookaholic5

maybe they invented love by @broship-addict

[the-chicken-or-the-banana]

andreil and goodbye kisses (pt 2) ft. kevin

you can find part 1 here :) you probs need to read that to understand this one!

part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8

neil tries to kiss andrew out of sight of the other foxes, but it's not always easy

matt knows already, of course, about neil's newfound way of saying goodbye

but keeping the others away proves to be slightly... impossible

kevin catches them first

the three of them are at night practice, but andrew was refusing to participate

"this is homophobia, you can't force me to play, kevin"

"what the fu-"

anyway. so neil and kevin are practicing. they do their thing

(andrew is most definitely not staring at neil's shorts, of course not surely he has more self-control than that)

(spoiler alert: he does not, it turns out, have that much self-control)

about an hour in, kevin and neil go on a short water break because hydration

neil jogs up to the bleachers where andrew is sitting and quietly speaks to him, out of kevin's sight

kevin leans against the wall of the court, drinking water and scrolling through his East Asian Studies group chat (no Jackson, the Chinese were not "blazing it" during the Opium Crisis)

he gets so caught up in his rant that he realizes the time is now 10 minutes after their break was supposed to end

and that's certainly unusual isn't it? because neil is just as obsessed with exy as kevin is, and it's really weird that he hasn't come to tell kevin to start practice again, oh god what if something's wrong, what if kevin wasn't paying enough attention and something bad happened shit shit SHIT

so kevin runs over to the bleachers where he remembers andrew and neil usually sit and finds... them in a very heated make-out session

and yes, kevin can admit that he feels some relief that everything's okay. it's mostly just annoyance though. what did he ever do to be cursed to see this much PDA from his roommates?

"ahem. neil. josten. get off of andrew's lap right now, we're supposed to be practicing"

neil quickly twists around at kevin's voice, nearly toppling off of andrew. he regards kevin with a sheepish look

"ah right yes i just got a bit, um, distracted"

"evidently"

so kevin thinks neil will go about disentangling himself and starts to turn away

but of course, neil lives to surprise him

instead of getting off of andrew immediately he leans in once more

kevin is resigning himself to have to physically break the two apart at this point

but instead of going in for another long kiss, neil brushes his lips on andrew's nose and gives him a softer smile than kevin is used to seeing on the striker's face

kevin cannot believe his eyes

but the pink on andrew's cheeks is certainly real. so he couldn't have imagined that

quite frankly, kevin doesn't think he has the brain capacity to come with something like that in the first place

but he doesn't say anything. yet. he and neil practice as usual, and after some cool-down stretches and a quick shower, andrew drives the three of them back to the tower

andrew shoves neil into the their room and emerges again outside to where kevin is waiting

"spit it out day, why are you acting weird?"

"nothing really. you're just... a lot softer these days. with neil at least"

"what, do you want me to start kissing you too? i thought it was easier to remain heterosexual"

kevin rolls his eyes at this

"shut up. ugh. i guess i'm just glad he's making you a bit happier"

andrew gives him an appraising look (it's not as intense as he thinks it is considering the height different but kevin decides not to bring that up)

"and if i told you i'm never happy? that i may never be happy?"

kevin shrugs. "then i'll be glad that he's helping you feel safe enough to tell me that"

andrew is quiet for a moment. then—

"don't go around giving josten all the credit for that. he already has a big enough ego"

andrew turns on his heel and walks into the bedroom, leaving kevin to realize what andrew just implied

kevin lets himself smile for a moment. no matter what he says, he really is happy for his friends. even if what he saw today was horribly sappy

he goes to bed with the knowledge that andrew and neil are in good hands with each other

(but really, he's already drafting plans on banning PDA in the court because he desperately does not want to walk in on neil and andrew again)

[andrew-isnt-for-the-game03]

It’s cute to imagine the Scenario of Neil bleeding out on the field while playing and Andrew getting angrier and angrier because he sees the blood on Neil, and Andrew just wins the game for them?

He doesn’t let anyone make a shot.

He throws the ball into the other goal not once not twice but FIVE times

And now I’m going to write a short story for this.

E n j o y 🤍

Neil was darting across the field trying to get the ball. He knew he shouldn’t be going as hard at the beginning, but he felt so free and energized he didn’t care.

Neil goes to reach for the ball but he gets shoved into the wall with so much force from the other guy he could almost see stars, the guy immediately got a yellow card because of the unnecessary violence.

Abby, the foxes nurse immediately had Coach pull him off the field so she could look at him.

Andrew’s worried eyes followed him, inching to check on Neil, but Andrew knew if he moved now he wouldn’t be moving toward their side of the field but their opponents.

He squeezed his fists together, his fingers inching for his knife right now. It seemed that Andrew wasn’t the only one with this thought, half of the tear was glaring at the player who did this.

Neil brushed it off tho, telling Abby he was fine to play, but she always heard this from his mouth so she didn’t listen to him, so Neil stands up, gently brushing Abby, Renee, and Nicky off of him, as he grabbed his gear.

“Listen, if I don’t play right now I will lose it,” Neil didn’t even give them a chance to object he was already on the field getting in place. Everyone looked at him worryingly, but got in place. The only one noticing the blood on his face was Dan, but the game had already started so she couldn’t say anything until they reset.

Neil ran for the fall as his opponents tried to shot but Kevin was able to catch it in time and run off the other way.

Neil turns to run, but he hears his name for the gritted teeth of his goalie. Neil tries to place the stick in his hand in front of him, but he knew Andrew could see all the blood running down his face.

“Neil…” Andrew warns, feeling his body temp rising as he watches the blood run down Neils face.

“Why are you still on this field?” He demands stalking toward Neil, forgetting all about his position on the field, for the boy he loved.

Luckily, when Neil looked to the other side, Kevin was tossing the ball to Dan.

Andrew grabs the base of Neils mask, forcing Neil to look at him.

Andrew could only see red. Literally and metaphorically.

Blood covered Neils face, but Neil pulls back, shaking his head at Andrew, who was now planning an exy players murder, maybe two if Neil doesn’t get off the field to get help, like he should have been doing this whole time.

“Andrew, I know it looks bad-“ Andrew cut the idiotic player off.

“Bad? You have fucking blood everywhere,”

“If I don’t play I’ll lose it, I need to be here, and I am staying on this field, I don’t care what anyone says right now.” Neil was benched from the last two games because of his injures and he’ll be damned if he doesn’t play this one.

Neil yanks himself away from the goally harder than he met to and starts backing up to go help his team.

“I’ll sit and listen to you bitch about this later, but if you make me leave this field right now-“ Neil knew he didn’t need to finish the airless threat for Andrew to understand what he was saying, Andrew wanted to object badly, he knew one look from him to their coach and Neil would be pulled, but he hates when Neil loses his cool more, he doesn’t happen often, if actually ever, but when it does it scares everyone including Andrew, so Andrew angerily goes back to his place.

Everyone could see how angry the goalkeeper was, but no one said anything as he didn’t allow anyone to make a goal tonight.

Andrew even scored the winning points. Causing everyone to cheer and run to the end to meet him, but Andrew was already stalking toward Neil. Andrew grabs him by the elbow, fingers digging in Neils skin a little to hard as he shoves him off the field and into the medical box.

“If he comes out of this room still bleeding I will lose my shit.” Andrew storms out of the room, detoured to the locker room where he quickly throws off his gear and grabs his knife. He had to deal with that scumbag.

Kevin enters the room, realizing what was happening and immediately changed and followed silently behind Andrew. He knew he couldn’t stop him, but he knew if Andrew needed help he needed to be there.

It didn’t take Andrew long to find the player who did it to his boy, he grabs him by the shoulder slamming him into the wall.

“You think you’re tough playing like that?” The player goes to say something, but when he feels the knife cutting his playing arm he grunts in pain.

“This is the only warning you get, you mess with my striker again, and I will kill you.” Andrew leaves one more cut along his wrist, before punching him directly in the face, insuring he has to deal with exactly what Neil has to now, before he goes back to his team, still pissed off.

Neil runs into Andrew and Kevin on the way back, but the look on Andrews face he doesn’t want to ask.

“I’ll deal with you when we get home.” Andrew growls passing by Neil angrily.

Neil knew what this meant too.

He wasn’t going to be sleeping tonight.

[ohanthonytomallamadingdong]

Currently reading All for the Game for the first time. I’m on chapter 6 of the first book. Here are my current thoughts.

Neil: not overly Bright but very Smart; survival instincts an interesting combo of phenomenal and terrible; willing to be literally murdered to play a game; baggage is not designer nor vintage; yells in French for Dramatic Effect when he should’ve kept it a secret

Kevin: has exactly one passion and will die/kill for it; he and Andrew have Tension; he and Neil have Tension; would definitely hate him in real life but he’s currently the character I relate to most; don’t know what that says about my self-image; ornithophobic

Andrew: goblin; smol but I keep forgetting that because he is Big; interesting sibling dynamics; bad person? good person? I don’t know and neither does he; will commit murder; stabs as a warning; mom dead? buy car.

Aaron: judgy; Done with everyone; honestly I vibe with him but I don’t know if I like him???; honestly haven’t really figured him out

Nicky: gay; minor rapey vibes with his comments about Neil and Kevin but I hope he gets better; should apologize for those things; but otherwise cool; very welcoming to Neil which is refreshing; was there for the twins when they needed him which I appreciate

Wymack: so nice?? And like?? Aware of his team’s trauma??? And how his size/gender/appearance/attitude affects that????;gave Neil a home and a lock and a key and a chance and I love him; Dad; also Daddy; def dating Abby and I’ve only seen one interaction between them

Matt: Lovely; Precious; loves Neil; getting himbo vibes but we’ll see; dating Dan????; wants Love; waiting to find out his trauma….

Dan: badass; o captain my captain; first woman in NCAA exy???; hottttt

Those are all the characters I feel okay commenting on so far.

In conclusion: everyone is hot; many are problematic; this is a very complicated life Neil’s got; I want in on whatever Dan and Matt have; I ship Andrew x Neil x Kevin (only if they figure their shit out) and I’m getting major poly vibes and I’m poly so I want v bad plz give

Stay tuned