#I’ve never read the books so idk if it applies to them

[tilundsetning]

Ok, so this gif from @gifshistorical came across my dash and as Daphne’s turn of the wrong century-looking bloomers fed into my increasingly frequent thoughts of « wow, some of the underwear technology in Bridgertonland is certainly miles ahead » (Kate was wearing what looked more like 1940’s French knickers in s2, their shirts seem to button all the way down etc) and then it came to me:

Bridgerton is set in someone’s game of civilisation!

Whoever is playing has probably given up on a domination victory, so that’s why , even though this is set in the 1810’s, none of the several younger sons in the family seem to be even considering a military career.

And by not prioritising the military technologies they are moving very quickly forwards in certain areas of fashion technology (side note: I really want some sort of fashion history expansion of Civ now where you can actually choose these), so they have access to zippers and knickers and aniline dyes and plastic sequins. They haven’t got any « hair up or down » or « difference between daywear and eveningwear » civics in play, but they there’s some sort of Victorian sex ed for girls thing instead.

This also explains the « oh, no, we totally used to have racism too, but we solved that like 15-20 years ago » vibe - that’s when they got the totally colourblind society-civic!

[actualtoad]

mutuals idk if any of you have read little women but if you ever did which of the sisters was your favorite im so interested

[communistkenobi]

I read this article yesterday profiling a woman who actively denies the sandy hook shooting and harasses people online and in public about it (warning that it’s pretty disturbing), and I don’t think the article has much explanatory value, as in, I don’t think it does much to explain why people believe demonstrably untrue things, but I think the article itself a good example of why you cannot take anything conspiratorial people (who are overwhelmingly, if not entirely, right wing) say in good faith or at face value. The woman, Watt, never provides evidence for why she believes the shooting was a hoax; she only provides justifications for why her beliefs are rational. One of the angles the interviewer takes early on in the piece is that perhaps this woman is incapable of processing a tragedy that horrifying, and has to resort to denialism to cope with it. Watt rejects this explanation immediately, and the interviewer doesn’t really bring it up again in the piece.

But like, who cares what this woman has to say? Why are we trusting her judgment of her own behaviour when she is clearly incapable of engaging with reality? Over and over again the only explanation of this behaviour that I’ve found meaningful is that right wing beliefs are inherently anti intellectual, and extreme manifestations of those beliefs produce extremely irrational people. Now that still doesn’t explain why these people are irrational (the article tosses in possible psychiatric causes, which I don’t think it very helpful or useful), but it is a rebuttal to the idea that you can construct a rational framework for irrational behaviour. These conspiracy people actively reject reality for whatever reason, and so asking them about their position in reality is not only pointless, but taking their answers as valuable means you’re applying an intellectual sheen onto what is, again, anti-intellectualism given ideological form.

But like that also poses problems. Understanding modern conspiracy theories requires engaging with them on an intellectual level, and studying why these things are so popular is important. I’ve read socio-political explanations for why these things occur (white supremacy, settler colonialism, capitalism), as well as individual psychological explanations (childhood trauma, unstable relationships, social isolation), and neither of those explanatory models by themselves feel fully adequate. The answer is both, probably, but the degree to which either the macro or the micro is responsible for these things is in constant tension.

And always, always at the base of it there is this bizarre quality to it. It’s a frame of mind I feel wholly incapable of sympathising with on any level, which is horrifying for a number of reasons. It’s also a sentiment that seems to be a consistent theme in a lot of the literature I’ve read about right wing conspiracy theories - authors admitting that they quite literally cannot fathom living in the world in this way. Engaging with it intellectually almost requires your complete removal from it, but in that instance it’s also impossible to fully grasp what you’re studying.

Idk sorry this is kind of rambly. I think about this a lot. The Authoritarian Personality is a book I keep coming back to on the topic, and it’s something the authors actively grapple with as they attempt to study anti-semitism as a societal force (in their terms, an anti-democratic force) directly after WWII. It feels like an impossible problem to solve

[estrellami-1]

That is a very cute fic (though all of yours are💜) it’s adorable that you based that off of how you feel I really like the line about not being the first to discover it but getting it to discover it for myself, I’ve been to slam poetry events they are very fun I feel like I read so many beautiful lines in poetry online and they stick with me to the point I think about them often and it kind of puts the author on a pedestal a bit but seeing someone speaking their poetry to you and a crowd of people in person is so vulnerable that it allows you to see them as just a person in a really beautiful way, like yes their work is brilliant but they’re also dealing with things the same way you are and trying their best and filled with emotions it’s a privilege to be able to know them as more than their writing, like it’s a privilege to get to know you like this. I also backpacked around Italy a few years ago and it was the most magical experience, the Acosta valley is so beautiful and I hiked gran paradiso national park which was stunning highly recommend but you’re right the cost of living is already crazy 😅

I write poetry sometimes mostly just as a way to get my feelings out of my head I post them to my tumblr but they don’t do numbers or anything, like probably 8 years ago or so I posted some of them to an old ao3 account but i can’t remember what i had called it for the life of me, I have an idea for a book that I would really like to write one day, it started out as an after Cinderella kind of thing where people expect you to be happy and perfectly fine when you find something good and get out of a bad situation but you’re still going to carry the pain from that bad situation so it was going to be from her perspective and recovering from the trauma she experienced growing up anf learning to live with ptsd but I’ve written bits and pieces of it nothing major but along the way it kind of lost the Cinderella princess aspect of it and just became kind of a combo my story/original character story kind of thing if that makes sense 💜💜💜💜💜

Thank you darling ❤️ I have some poetry on here, I believe… I think it’s the links in the last paragraph on my pinned post. I’ll try and go through them in a moment and make sure 😂

Slam poetry events are SO fun, I love them!!! There’s a book I read in college called “The Poet X” and I HIGHLY recommend it especially if you like spoken word poetry!!! It very very quickly became a favorite of mine, partially just because it’s good (and partially bc it’s a Latina girl lmao) but also partially because I wasn’t aware that type of writing could become a book. I would absolutely LOVE to do something like that one day!

And I know what you mean, about authors and pedestals. I did the same thing too, a few times, with certain authors on here… but then we got to talking and it turns out they’re literally just people?? Which was honestly so fun to find out 😂 there’s a line I wrote for a fic a while ago (Marvel, if you are/were into that) that I think honestly applies perfectly here. “Put those stars in your eyes back in the sky where they belong. I’m not worth all that.” And honestly… it’s true. Putting someone on a pedestal only makes it hurt that much more when they inevitably fall, because we’re all only human and we’re gonna do dumb crap sometimes.

I have… a lot of feelings about that apparently 😂

Can I have your life???? Please???? 😂 Italy sounds SO fun… I was able to go to Hawaii once and that was nice but I don’t even like the beach/ocean! I got stung by a jellyfish!! My favorite memory there was going on a hike!!! 😂 take me to Colorado I swear. My family’s trying to decide where to go on vacation this year (if it actually happens, that is) and my sister LOVES the beach and wants to go, but we’ve gone SO MUCH and my family KNOWS I don’t like the beach and just. Don’t seem to care? Idk. At this point it’s kinda whatever. But I did suggest skiing this winter since we’ve never been 😂

Ooh honestly I’d love to read all of that!!! I LOVE poetry (like honestly it confused the hell out of me how some people just… don’t understand poetry? What??? 😂)(my favorite is Langston Hughes… how about you?) and I would LOVE to read that Cinderella-ish story, that sounds SO interesting!!! And yes lmao I’ve definitely started a story before, added OCs, and it turned into 6 parts (literally, in the case of my Solangelo series “This Love” on ao3 😂)

Two questions this time, if you don’t mind, darling: how old are you? Where do you live?

It’s more than fine if you’re not comfortable sharing either, or if you want to just share a general range; I understand wanting privacy, I’m mostly just trying to ensure you’re above 18, and as for where you live, I’m strictly curious as to the time difference; I’m in Texas, so it’s currently 12:24am. I just know last night (was it last night? 😂) I answered one at like 10 and you were mentioning how tired you were… so either you’re on one of the coasts (I can’t for the life of me figure out which one that would be at the moment 😂) or you’d had an early morning… or you have a decent sleep schedule, unlike me! 😂 my bedtime is routinely around 12-2am, which is why I’m constantly answering these at all hours of the night. 😂 ❤️

[doctormage]

anyway I wanna finish the show first (n we only have like 5 eps left!!) before deep diving into my Thoughts but I will say. I wish they’d given more thought to how the soul/lack thereof works with vampirism. this got rly long so have a read more

bc sometimes it’s like, no a vampire is just a human shell for a demon! (which is what they usually SAY, and what is shown most clearly w angel/angelus. especially when he has his soul and references the demon still inside him at least once that I can clearly recall - when they use that demon to kill the bad guy in that one halloween episode)

but sometimes it’s like, no it’s the same person as when they were human, they just lack humanity. (which iirc is never actually said, but imo VERY frequently implied with spike. esp now that I’ve seen the ep where he changes his mom to try and save her & she’s awful to him, and he’s viscerally disturbed by it. like, that’s still his mom to him. he still cared about her and wanted to help her. even tho he’s not william anymore, just a demon wearing his skin? make it make sense!!)

(the vampire version of his mom even SAYS he’s the same and always will be!!! like!!! is he just a special case bc he was THAT sensitive as a human lmfao help!!!)

it raises a lot of questions abt what makes a person themselves that I don’t think they quite took into consideration continuity-wise? like they SAY the demon can have the same mannerisms and memories as the person, but it’s still not the person they were. that’s a very frequently-made point when buffy is coming to terms w the fact that she’ll have to kill angelus.

so ok then, what makes the person. a functioning conscience? if the ~soul~ makes them who they are, what makes the demon NOT-them, besides that conscience? they have the same body, same memories, and (occasionally) elements of the same personality.

it just feels like fraught logic used to make the angel/angelus distinction very strict, but isn’t really applied to spike beyond the initial whiplash of seeing his human self vs who he is now. angelus couldn’t love someone but angel could, because he has a soul. so why can spike love people?? even if poorly? my first impression of him was that he was super devoted and loyal to dru!! what does it mean!!

and further! I find it really hard to believe spike did all the good things he did (as a demony vampire! sans soul!) exclusively bc of the chip. the chip prevented him from hurting people, it didn’t force him to help people. it’s rly how he is around dawn that sends this home for me bc yeah, buffy would’ve hated him if he put dawn in danger. but idk man! I don’t think a soulless demon’s hots for her inherently overrides his desire to not be tortured and killed by glory! and he continues to look after dawn even when buffy is dead!! why bother if the “reason” you’re being good isn’t even around to “reward” you for it!! idk!!! and that’s just ONE example like……please help

(I don’t want to talk about the Fuck Shit bc I was more than a little traumatized but idk. why would a soulless demon go out of his way, through much trial and torture, to get his soul back? genuinely I don’t understand how all this fits in. if humanity is something that can be learned and practiced, as it seemed to be with spike at the time, what is it about a soul that changes you so drastically? that then you innately have a conscience rather than one you have to actively choose to develop? these are not rhetorical Qs I’m truly not understanding the whole deal AND why a soulless demon would want to get his soul back. if he was so evilbad and incapable of love. which they imply is due to the soullessness. hello)

anyway I didn’t mean for this to become spike propaganda but he is unfortunately the reason I can’t rly grasp the show’s concept of the soul re: vampires. I know the real answer is that they just didn’t think it through (as a video game player and show watcher and book reader I am aware that this is USUALLY the answer) but!!! it fucking plagues me

[katierosefun]

hey there! quick quest, if you don’t mind answering— what’s it like studying law, would you recommend, and if someone were interested in that, do you know of any websites or books they could look at that that would give them a picture of what to expect if they study it? because i’ve seen some of your posts on law school and law sounds cool:D but idk much about it, and idk how to find out stuff about it, yk?

hi anon!

studying law is honestly fun for me, just because i've always been pretty interested in the legal field since i was pretty young. now that i'm actively studying it, though, i can confidently say that it's mostly a lot of reading. (like, a lot of reading. you'll be reading up to 100+ pages a night, and those 100+ pages are big pages, with small font and single-spaced and also with sentences that can be 5 lines long.) and also learning how to write for an impatient person. (the irony in reading some of the most convoluted opinions in writing history, only to have your legal writing/law practice/whatever professor go " u are writing for some of the most impatient people in the planet, so u better write as concisely as u possibly can".)

there's also something called cold calls in law school, which is basically when a professor will actively call on you on the spot. sometimes, professors will organize panels, so they'll only call on the same handful of people, but other times, professors will make sure that everyone is fair game for every class. at least in my school, i usually speak into a microphone and have to maintain eye contact with my professor as i explain why a court ruled this way or what this super complex legal theory exactly is or how to dismiss a claim in x court or whatever--which, for an introvert like me, can be a little bit intimidating, but i swear it's not as bad as it sounds.

at least in america, studying law and going to law school entails not just doing a lot of reading and struggling through cold calls, but it also means networking. and also trying really hard to get along with your classmates, even if you find some of them incredibly annoying. more often than not, a lot of the classmates that you have in law school are bound to be, like, your actual colleagues at some point in the future (because most law schools are pretty regional-focused). everyone's got incentive to at least be civil with each other, because you never know if the guy you're taking shots with one night mind wind up being your co-counsel or prosecutor or judge ten, twenty years from now.

re: the second part of your question: i didn't ever read any books or refer to websites about what it's actually like to study law. i actually mostly just asked professors of mine back in college (because i was lucky enough to have professors who either went to law school or were practicing attorneys themselves), but i know that a lot of my classmates read law 101: everything you need to know about american law (although i have no idea if you're american) before starting classes.

outside of that though, i know websites like lsatmax have some book recs about what law school might be like , , , but like! if law school is something that you're interested in, don't be afraid to ask actual law school students as well (which you're already doing lol). i think there's a good chunk of law schools (at least, in america) with students who are more than happy to have a virtual coffee and just chat about what it's like to be a law student, advice on what to do if you do want to go to law school/want to apply, etc.

and ofc, i'm more than happy to provide more information if you ever feel more curious!

edit: because i forgot to answer another vital part of your question--i honestly i am not sure if i would recommend studying law or not. it really is one of those things that i think you need to know for sure about yourself first, just because law school (at least, again, in america) is hellishly expensive, and depending on what you want to do with that degree, it might not be worth the expense. also, really ask yourself why you might want to pursue law--law touches so many parts of life, so it might not be as hyperspectific as, say, wanting to pursue medicine or a master’s degree in a certain subject, but again: you gotta think on it. i know a lot of my professors told me that if i even have a 5% doubt in going to law school, then i shouldn’t do it, just because it’s a lot of work. not to scare you off, but i can and will confidently say that the law school application process is hell, and the actual classes are pretty rigorous, and you’ll also usually be working with some of the most god-complex-slash-narcissist people you’ll ever meet. but i think that if you know who you are, then you can overcome all that and hopefully pursue this also incredibly complex field that i think has the potential to do so much good.

[goblins-riddles-or-frocks]

Favourite classics?

Oh my god, so in case you were not aware, anon, for the longest time my entire personality was Into Classic Literature. But I also burnt out pretty hard and it’s been a good few years since I’ve read most of my favorites so I’m not entirely sure how my feelings would shift on reread for most of these? And a lot of my thoughts are highly tied to nostalgia and my experiences at the time I was most fond of and actively reading them. But with that caveat, let’s dive in:

- Phantom of the Opera by Gaston Leroux

This should surprise no one. I am a Phantom of the Opera fan first and a person second. OG hyperfixation. I literally learned French to read it in the original language. I love the gothic drama, I love the wonky detective fiction vibes. Erik is fascinating and horrible as a character. Christine has never done anything wrong in her life and I love her. I used to project really hard on their dynamic. But simply by virtue of not being in an abusive relationship anymore, I’ve kind of outgrown this story? I still appreciate it a lot for the drama and themes, and the nostalgia means I’ll love it forever. I just don’t think I’ll ever go back to it with that same fervor. (I mean. hopefully lol)

- Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

Another book that was incredibly formative. I love the atmosphere, I love the poisonous relationships and the way the characters could never really escape each other. The way the second generation suffered so much for the mistakes of the first. It’s so good. When I was a teen, I read the entire fucking novel out loud for a group of other kids over the course of a few months? Idk it was weird and very earnest. And the utterly rapt look on everyone’s faces when we got to the famous “You say I killed you? Haunt me then” scene is a cherished memory lmao.

- Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky

I had a long Russian lit phase, and this was one of my favorites at the time. I love the complexity, the grimness. Raskolnikov’s spiral is fascinating. OG antihero. The angst and anguish and almost delirium of his character is so fucking good. And the philosophical questions and politics of the novel itself is also super compelling. Like from a historical standpoint it’s also just so intriguing to consider the context in which it was written in and the philosophical movements it’s in response to.

- Dracula by Bram Stoker

Vampires man, idk I love them. The Gothic melodrama of it all. The characters’ different journeys. The very nerdy focus on logistics lol. This is a story that I’ve loved long enough and consistently enough that it’s honestly hard to point out what I like about it because like. of course I do. But yeah it’s all just incredibly fun to me.

Dracula is also obviously a very flawed text and at its heart a lot of its metaphors are steeped in xenophobia, homophobia, etc etc. And as much as I love the story itself, I think it’s definitely just as interesting for those flaws imo. Analyzing the context of historical texts is a large part of the appeal for me. And that also applies to how much of a genre and trope codifier it was.

Honorable mentions because I’m out of time to talk at length actually:

Shakespeare’s tragedies, Jane Eyre, most of Poe’s short stories, War and Peace by Tolstoy, Yevgeny Onegin by Pushkin, Great Expectations by Charles Dickens (even though his prose kills me), Turn of the Screw by Henry James, the Oresteia, We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson, Frankenstein, My Cousin Rachel and Rebecca by Du Maurier

[1lvaites]

2, 15, 19… I just want your views on books bb I’m sorry 😫

hi i am giving u a kiss on the forehead rn <3 don’t be sorry !!!!!!

2.    top 5 books of all time?

in no particular order:   vicious,   six of crows duology ( package deal ),   the invisible life of addie larue,   these violent delights,   the raven cycle ( it’s a series ik but package deal ).

15.    recommend and review a book.

vicious !!!!!!!! god i go BRRRR for vicious and i think everyone should read it tbh. it’s a delicious concept and provides so much room for verses and ocs if we’re thinking how to apply our obsessions to rp. it’s by ve schwab so naturally, i’m a slut. its about people who get powers after near death experiences and the powers are based on their last thought as they die. it’s so hot i cannot say that enough. and the plot itself is???? yummy. the mcs are angsty and broody and there’s hot fighting scenes and tension and lore and BLAH I JUST. CAN’T RECOMMEND THIS BOOK ENOUGH !!!!!

19.    most disliked popular books?

HMMMMMM. im tryign to think thoughts bc i mentioned the atlas six, portrait of a thief, acotar ( i heart u im sorry ), and hp.   i’m trying not to be a pretentious hater by adding books i just already know i’d hate despite not having ?? any experience with them idk hmmmmm. this isn’t a book i dislike and im not even sure if it’s popular, but ninth house is taking me ..........too long to get into. i’ve had it for years already and i can never get past the first few chapters.  like i’ve already talked about how much i wanted to get into it but it is like.....so insanely difficult. the writing is hard to grasp not because i’m illiterate lmao but because it’s just messy and incoherent? i don’t know wtf is going on. i’m mad bc the aesthetics and concept of it? immaculate. i want to read it and just be done with it but mANNNNNN it’s hard.  im sorry this is lame i tried googling popular books and it did not work LKSFJDSLFJKS

[wishblown]

When you die and go for judgement God will sit there and infinitely not say anything and you’ll do all the damning work yourself.

— Glen Duncan; The Last Werewolf

August Reads!

Kassandra by Christa Wolf — 4.75/5: Christa Wolf my beloved <3 idk if I liked this better than her Medea but I really did adore this one; such a good retelling/new interpretation (?) that doesn’t reframe Kassandra as simply a victim or a modern new-wave girlboss but a three dimensional human being, a person responding to her circumstances, a woman trapped in her times and condemned by a future she cannot help but see, it’s so good bc Wolf just gets it: she lets Kassandra be scared and selfish and ignorant bc she’s human but she’s also brave bc there’s no alternative; she sees, she has to

Voraussetzungen einer Erzählung: Kassandra by Christa Wolf — 4/5: companion piece to Wolf’s Kassandra that I read right afterwards; it’s a series of lectures and notes on the books and it’s conception which was really interesting to read after the novel; I learned a little about literary theory and more on the mythology behind Kassandra (didn’t know much about it before, shame on me) but also the feminist reading of these topics and Wolf’s intentions behind her text/how it came to be; there was also an essay on current affairs (now no longer ‘current’, it’s from the 80s, though I do think it still applies) which I read more than once because the connections Wolf made between contemporary politics, feminist theory, and Kassandra were incredibly interesting

Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky — 4/5: my first Dostoevsky! and I’m really happy with it (and the German translation I got); I enjoyed the style of writing and the story arch/progression that let you explore the depth of the characters; I didn’t always love how he portrayed all his female characters (product of the time I guess) but overall his characters and the interactions between them really made this bc they were so flawed and had so much depth in their very human errors and attempts to make things right (for themselves at the very least); looking forward to reading another one!

Little Weirds by Jenny Slate — 4.75/5: such a lovely read and a breath of fresh air; her use of language felt so genuine in its simplicity yet in this simplicity she’s able to evoke such a range of emotions and depth; her metaphors and mantras never felt silly even when they were silly perhaps that ‘silliness’ or childlike way she would sometimes break things down with her big imagination even helped to bridge the gap to bigger, more ‘complex’ feelings she was talking about idk; I took so many notes; great read

The Last Werewolf by Glen Duncan — 3.5/5: this one kinda frustrated me because on the one hand it was written so beautifully with a compelling story and an interesting protagonist and I mean genuinely beautiful prose and heartfelt inner monologue of the protagonist but then oh boy the treatment of sex and sexuality and women in that kinda context just bothered me and eventually even began to annoy me. I get that the author was trying to put these things at odds and show the protagonist’s animalistic side and whatever but at a certain point I’ve read too many descriptions of what someone’s cunt and anus smell like or how much his cock reacts (not exaggerating), I got it yk? And it really took me out of the story a few times. Didn’t like the ending either; seemed very “a woman’s fate” to me idk, idk the women fit into a few specific roles and it icked me out a little sometimes — you could just tell it was written by a man i guess. but then it was also so good!!! I’m conflicted

Justiz (The Execution of Justice) by Friedrich Dürrenmatt — 4/5: I feel like you either like Dürrenmatt or you don’t? I fall into the former category and I did like this one as well, though I’m not sure if it’s my favourite. I like simply like his style, the mix of dry Swiss humour and social commentary + character study, he often does. Justiz is an interesting read bc the entire time you know what happened, you know who’s the murderer, but you also already know that the judicial system has failed. So what else is this about? What game is being played? Ofc there are issues with Dürrenmatt (sexism much, antiziganism too) so you gotta read critically but that���s the case with anything I think.

[rosencrantzsguildenstern]

1 & 2 for book asks?

okay yes thank you!!!

book you’ve reread the most times?

this is a little interesting because thinking back there's tv shows and especially podcasts that i've relistened and relistened to but with books i tend to reread them less....that said it’s definitely either the homeward bounders (by diana wynne jones) or the marvelous land of oz (sequel to baum’s ‘the wonderful wizard of oz’ of cinematographic fame).

the homeward bounders is just?? really good?? it’s got a crazy premise and is so good at like... showing this unique pov of this 100-year old immortal preteen and taking all this stuff he goes through and how it effects him but still letting him and the other main characters have very clear personalities. it’s really good at showing effects of trauma subtly and it’s also very funny in some points! it’s also got THEMES- the way it like adapts mythology is so so good.

anyway marvelous land of oz. i still really enjoy it but the amount of times i’ve reread it is because it was a childhood favorite;- i got a kindle paperwhite for christmas at about six or seven with a bunch of public domain classics predownloaded for me and that explains so much about why i am the way i am. anyway this includes all 24 oz books but the marvelous land of oz jumped out to me the most because i really loved ozma, and it’s her introduction/solo book, which she stars in. but then when i read further i felt like she had become this perfect paragon leader (bc of. like. gender roles idk) and all the depth and complexity and comedy of her character had kind of been lost. i think i liked it for slightly different reasons as a kid- i liked the oz books in general because after the first few, oz became this perfect world it was fun to imagine. even now i get hit by the urge to reread the marvelous land of oz! and i do and i enjoy it. i want to buy this fancy illustrated edition so much... it’s always on my mind

2. top 5 books of all time?

okay so obviously there’s gonna be overlap with the above but i’ll give a straight list. this is SO subjective btw

1. the homeward bounders- i mean see above but also know that everything i was talking about? yeah its an 80s book and the plot feels SO based on that 80s thing when everyone was obsessed with d&d and thought it would make demons and monsters. fun fact 

2. the war of the worlds- it’s a classic! it’s good! it’s well written! it’s got themes! but mostly something about it just hits the things i like weirdly well? i love sci fi and i also LOVE when characters go through the worst experiences of their life

3. frankenstein- i like being pretentious (this also applies to above) but no uhh legitimately it’s a really good book. BEAUTIFUL prose and the points it makes are brilliantly thought out and executed... like when we start off by walton being like i wish i had a friend!! and then we read through the whole thing and it’s got PAYOFF because a companion is the only thing the creature wants.... people could (and DO!!) analyze this book forever

4. in other lands- it’s a very clever, completely irreverent comic satire of a fantasy world that manages to end up very heartfelt and real! it’s fundamentally a coming of age story, where we watch the main characters go from 13 to... 18 i believe? somewhere around there anyway their arcs are VERY good, and the satire also has very interesting things to say about the real world

5. the marvelous land of oz- unlike the homeward bounders i can’t say much more about this.... charming kid’s book. movies do NOT do it justice and never did (and wicked does even worse. i could TALK about wicked)

bonuses i didn’t mention because they’re plays: ‘rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead’ (by tom stoppard) and ‘chitra’ (by tagore). i NAMED myself chitra so you can better bet the latter had an impact on me. that’s for personal reasons, whereas ragad is just really good and would probably be #1 on this list if i was counting it

[literateleah]

okay hi leah sorry for coming into ur inbox unsolicited but i was wondering if i could get some advice ah 😭 im 14 and ive been been known as that kid into literature and analysis always reading etc etc. but in the past few years ive gotten completely out of reading and im struggling like an abnormal amount w getting back into it but especially the analysis part. like lately ive been reading papers and crit about works before even reading them and i feel like my critical analysis skills are completely depleted or have never been there at all. idk i just dont think im picking up on obvious symbols or themes, or just things i feel should be apparent to me and its really draining and i constantly feel like an idiot when i do finally read. ig i came to you because i really respect your thoughts and obvious intelligence especially in literary analysis, and i was wondering if it came naturally to you? have you ever felt this way? i just hate feeling like i can't pick up on anything and i was hoping you had any advice on idk how to analyze better. i think reading analysis beforehand plays a big part but idk how to stop yknow. ugh im so sorry for this and if it made you uncomfortable please delete! again my deepest apologies

hi anon!!! no worries at all for sending this and asking questions i love asks like these!

i definitely feel what you mean about this stage of sort of reading burnout, and i would have considered myself in a similar stage until really recently honestly. when you’re consuming a lot of content and doing so to somewhat feed into your expectations for yourself and your thresholds and learning drives, it’s easy to burnout or lose focus! this is doubly so when you’re surrounding yourself with criticism that adds to your perception of a work before you even encounter it

what i do in these situations is i often start fresh with a completely new slate and find a new book to start from. i try to be less familiar with the author or critical coverage of it, and just immerse myself in a story that interests me. it’s also helpful to maybe dove into a new genre to be able to apply your skills and tastes to a fresh type of story! afterward, i’ll reevaluate what i read and maybe draft a brief review in which i focus on the following core tenets of critical analysis (for my personal process by no means officially in any capacity lol): plot, pacing, voice, character, narrative themes, cultural connections and implications. once i’ve broken down the story into those key elements, i feel i can more clearly articulate how i feel about it and what i understood from it! staying true to what i really think of and draw from a piece is key before clouding that judgement with the opinions and really valuable offerings of others that i dearly respect, but it starts in ur own mind ya know?

and honestly the main thing to remember is that reading is a pleasurable and joyful experience first!!! bringing urself back to the passion and thirst you had and still have for learning and reading is so important, and as cool as it is to use our incredible minds to dissect a story, it’s always. a good place to start by just experiencing it first. happy reading 💗💗💗

[urfavweeb]

feels - albedo x fem!reader

summary: albedo feels things for you that he’s not used to, but you feel them too.

MINORS PLS DNI!!!!! THX

word count: 1.9k

warnings: smut, unprotected sex, grinding, fingering, semi-public sex, virgin!albedo, idk what else tbh

author's note: if there are any issues pls lmk <3 i'm bad at endings lol so i'm sorry about that! i didn't proofread so if any errors pls say so!

days spent on dragonspine tend to drag on longer than others in your opinion. most of your friends would agree, but albedo is an exception to this opinion.

since he isn’t human, he doesn’t feel the cold quite as much as you do. that’s why whenever you mention being cold, he just raises an eyebrow at you as if you’re exaggerating.

you spend a lot of time at the mountain in albedo’s lab, often helping him gather materials or test out different potions and concoctions he creates.

you’d never been very good with creating things in the topic of alchemy, so you had decided to take up the position as his second assistant as well as a tester. sucrose had gotten more busy in mondstadt, which led to him needing more help.

being friends with albedo, you’d applied as quickly as possible. you couldn’t deny the fact that he was attractive to you (and thus caused your want to work with him to be emphasized).

and here you are now, almost a year into this job, shocked because it’s still not nightfall yet after hours of working on what feels like the coldest day of the year. you’re outside, looking in between bushes and trees trying to find different herbs for albedo.

you finally find a handful of the ones that albedo had explained, grinning at the thought of finally being able to go back to the campsite and curl up with a book by the fire. as you start your walk back, you look out towards mondstadt and admire the sunset.

eventually you reach the campsite, noticing albedo staring at a small stack of papers with an annoyed look on his face. his eyes go from the papers to you and a small smirk forms on his lips before disappearing right after.

“hello, y/n. did you get what i asked you for?” he asks softly as you approach him. you nod, setting down the pouch of herbs beside his workspace and showing him which ones you were able to find and telling which ones you weren’t able to find.

“it was a little hard to find a lot of them since so many were near groups of hilichurls and stuff. i really didn’t want to fight with any monsters or treasure hoarders today.” you say, looking up and meeting his eyes.

he nods, “that’s fine. i can go out later to fetch them.”

you notice that he seems a little off, expression more distant than it had been before you left. “is everything okay?” you ask, turning and walking up to the small fire pit and sitting down on one of the chairs.

“yes. i’ve just been dealing with some new thoughts and emotions recently, so i’ve been trying to get to the bottom of what they entail.” he says, and you nod as he speaks.

new emotions and thoughts? that’s interesting. you don’t want to press him for answers, but now you can’t help but wonder what he means by that, sending a questionable gaze in his direction.

you decide to reach over for a book you’ve been reading and pick it up, opening up to the page that you left off on and opting to occupy yourself instead of overthinking about what albedo could possibly be dealing with.

a few minutes go by before you can hear him sigh a few times and eventually approach you, standing in front of you and clearing his throat. you look up at him and raise your eyebrows, waiting for him to say something.

“i am attracted to you. i’ve been reading about human attraction and how different emotions can cause different bodily predicaments to occur, which has been happening to me whenever you’re around.” you look up at him, feeling your face go hot at his words.

you clear your throat. “um, what do you mean by that?”

his hand touches your face, stroking your cheek lightly whilst he smirks. “i think you’re smart enough to know what i’m saying to you.”

you swallow harshly, staring into his eyes as he leans in closer to you. you can feel his breath on your lips as he closes his eyes, hands falling down onto your waist as his nails dig into your skin.

once your lips meet, your lips move erratically against each other’s. his lips are as soft as you’d always imagined they’d be, and he seems more experienced than you would’ve expected. the way his fingers massage into your hips sends you reeling, whimpers escaping from your mouth.

eventually, he lifts you and leads you to a little cot placed near a small fire, pushing your back down into the mattress and kissing you once more. his body is on top of yours, his hips pushing into yours as his tongue finds its way into your mouth.

the feeling of his tongue swiping against your own overwhelms your senses, your panties growing more soaked by the second. little grunts bubble up from your throat when his clothed dick begins grinding harder against you.

his hands eventually move to your breasts and he begins groping them softly, hands eventually unzipping your coat and skillfully sliding if off while your lips stay glued together. his hands go underneath your shirt as he pulls away from your lips for a moment.

“are you okay with going any further?” he asks, voice sounding a lot more deep than usual. you nod quickly and he laughs softly, helping you get undressed until you’re in your bra and panties.

his eyes look over your body as he smirks, a hand reaching out and squeezing at one of your breasts. “you’re beautiful.” he says.

you smile up at him, tugging on his clothes and raising your eyebrows. “i’d like to compliment you too, so take off your clothes.”

minutes later, you’re both kissing again. this time both of you are in your underwear as his teeth nibble at your lips and tug a few times. his hips rut into yours, sending your head back as you gasp into his mouth.

his fingers play with the waistband of your panties before dipping down, his index finger reaching down and toying with your clit softly. you moan into his mouth at his touch, fingers digging into his arms.

his fingers enter you slowly, one after the next as they curl against your g-spot. your eyes are rolled back as he thrusts them fast, thumb brushing against your clit as his tongue swirls against your own.

you can feel your orgasm approaching quickly as you grind your hips against his hand, his lips finally leaving yours as he looks down at you and watches your face closely with a smug smirk on his face.

his face leans down and his free hand pulls one of your tits out from your bra, his lips kissing all over and sucking dark marks into your skin. you breathlessly moan his name out, feeling like you’re on the edge of cumming before his movements become more harsh and quick.

your toes curl as your orgasm washes over you, a moan escaping your lips as his teeth tug on your nipple roughly. his fingers don’t stop moving, your hips pushing back from the overstimulation.

“p-please stop, i’m too sensitive!” you cry out, hearing him chuckle lightly as he removes his fingers from your hole.

he’s quick to pull his cock out of his underwear, stroking the tip up and down your pussy. it hits your clit occasionally, sending you reeling into his touch as you shake from the stimulation.

as he gathers up your slick, he begins putting the tip in. he bites down on his bottom lip as he slowly slides in, and the stretch makes you moan loudly. once he bottoms out, he sighs at the feeling of your walls clenching against him.

his hands reach out for yours as he looks down into your eyes. “are you okay?”

you nod at him, “yes, now please move.” you whisper, feeling your thigh muscles twitching from arousal.

he begins thrusting slowly at first, having never felt this before. his movements aren’t as awkward as you would’ve expected, hands gripping onto your hips while he gets used to moving around.

once he starts going harder your moans become louder, feeling his tip hit your sweet spot repeatedly. your fingers grip onto his shoulders, trying to give your body some leverage against his movements.

despite his fast movements, you can’t help but crave more. you want him to make you sore for days on end. “harder, please!” you moan out.

you feel his hips move rougher against yours, smacking harshly and creating loud noises that echo against the walls of the campsite. the force of his movements causes your breath to shorten, shaky gasps coming from your throat.

the lack of airflow mixed with his hard thrusts have you going dizzy, eyes rolling back and tongue lulling out of your mouth. you’re close to cumming for the second time, your walls clenching involuntarily.

he grunts as he lifts up your legs, pushing them towards your shoulders as he thrusts at a new angle. your toes curl at the feeling, and one of his hands reaches down and he starts rubbing at your clit again.

this makes you moan his name out loudly, cumming against his cock and feeling your juices drip all over him.

he keeps going at the fast pace, thrusts eventually getting sloppier as he gets closer to cumming. his fingers dig into your hips, nails leaving marks as he grunts. the overstimulation of his movements hurts so good as you whine out.

eventually his hips stutter and you can feel him cum inside of you, thick cum filling up against your walls as he continues his movements through his orgasm.

after he’s finished cumming, he pulls out slowly and watches as his cum leaks from your pussy and down onto the cot. you adjust your body and stretch out your legs, wincing at the soreness between your legs.

“are you alright?” albedo asks, out of breath as he begins getting dressed. as he hands you your clothes, you nod at him.

you start getting dressed too, “yes. i honestly didn’t expect that to be so good, especially since you’re a virgin.” you tease him, a small smile on your face.

he laughs softly. “you’d be surprised what one can learn from reading.” he says, winking at you while he adjusts his papers that’d been sitting on one of the many tables in the campsite. as he finishes up, he decides to walk back over to you shortly after.

“thank you for allowing me to… experiment with you. it was an unforgettable experience, and i hope we can do it again soon.” he says, one of his hands reaching out and tucking hair behind your ear.

you giggle and press a chaste kiss on his lips, grasping onto his now gloved hands. “of course. i really do like you, albedo. i didn’t want that to be a one time thing.” you say, looking into his eyes.

you can hear shuffling behind you and turn to see sucrose walking in. “hey y/n! uh, your pants are on backwards…” she says, blushing as she looks between you and albedo.

you awkwardly look away from her, trying not to meet her eyes. “oh, thanks for letting me know.”

a look of realization forms on her face. “wait a minute! did you guys fornicate on MY cot?!” she shouts.

[remcycl333]

you don’t need to be happy to be manifest!! but...

who doesn’t want to be happy?

(long post alert, sorry in advance lol. but please read it all the way through, i really think it’ll be worth it<3)

ok, to preface this, you don’t need to be happy to manifest. i’ve manifested great, positive things while i was in depressive episodes. i manifested wonderful things with tears streaming down my face. BUT, i think something a lot of people overlook is that it’s really beneficial to feel positively about your desires.

this is something i realized a few months ago, saw great results from, and then forgot all about and, well, stopped seeing the progress i wanted. but i’m back on track now, don’t you worry.

(i’m going to be using the example of my sp, bc that’s what i have the most experience with, but this applies to literally anything u r manifesting) 

i’ve made a few other posts saying pretty much what i’m about to say in this next paragraph, so if you’ve already read those, i’m sorry for repeating myself. just bear with me lol. 

so i came to a realization a few months ago--and i don’t exactly remember how i came to this realization--that i kind of...hated my sp? like i fucking resented him. and i was like, wait a minute, that’s not right. i love my sp. that’s why i’m trying to manifest him! so why do i feel like this?

i used to focus on manifesting in steps, so naturally the first step was contact. so i’d be affirming all day every day “my sp is texting me right fucking now😡“ (and other variations) and then when he didn’t text me, it’d just make me angry at him. but technically, he didn’t even do anything wrong?? sure he didn’t text me, but he had no clue he was supposed to? idk it was all complicated and weird. and then when i wasn’t mad that he didn’t text me, i was having arguments with him in my head, preparing for some weird fight that my brain just assumed was going to happen whenever we did get into contact. which is weird, bc my sp and i never fight. like, this is my ex. yet i literally cannot tell you a single fight that we have ever had. we literally get along perfectly. we have never fought (or even argued) once in all the time that we’ve known each other. yet my brain was always fighting him. and it was just, exhausting?

and so one day, when i was troubleshooting, i realized: rem, if you were in a relationship right now with your sp, would u hate him? would u be constantly fighting with him? god i fucking hope not! 

now, what would i be thinking? i’d be laying in bed at night, hugging my pillow, thinking about how much i love him. reflecting on how happy he makes me, how perfect he is, how good he makes me feel. i’d be thinking about how he is the most perfect boyfriend i could ever have asked for. i’d be content after spending a long day with him, excited to spend the next day with him as well. 

and during the day i wouldn’t be wondering why he wasn’t texting me. if anything, i’d be wondering why he was texting me considering we were literally hanging out, together, at that very moment! 

i would trust him. i’d be walking on cloud nine. i’d be content. i’d be...happy. 

now, in no way am i saying that you need to be happy 24/7, or dancing on air, or feeling intense butterflies in your stomach. you’re allowed to have other emotions. you’re allowed to feel anger, you’re allowed to break down and cry! you’re allowed to have bad days. but if you’re feeling these negative emotions about your desire, i want you to try your hardest to release them. i don’t think any of us want to have breakdowns over our manifestations and cry about them, but if it happens, it happens. just pick yourself up afterwards--or stop it before it even really begins, trust me, it gets easier to do this--and maybe do a few deep breaths to calm yourself down, and remind yourself why you’re on this journey in the first place. once again using the sp example, it’s because you love your sp. because they are perfect for you! they make you happy. you love their smile, their laugh, the witty conversations you have with each other. you love being in their arms.  you love when they’re in your arms! they did something that made you fall in love with them, or want to be in a relationship with them. what was it? focus on that. 

enough with the sammy ingram (i could go on a whole rant about her) style affirmations. with the “he’s going to fucking text me, he has no choice, he’s my fucking boyfriend and he does what i say.” like....ew?? i used to say shit like this, and it was really what started making me resent my sp. i was ordering him around in my head, creating this weird dynamic between us (which, he wasn’t even aware was there), and getting mad when he wasn’t doing what i was ordering him to do. looking back, it was borderline psychotic. it was just turning it into me against him, and that’s not what i wanted at all. i want to be in a relationship with him, with mutual love. i don’t want to be his boss, or his mom, or his fucking military sergeant!! (i don’t even know if that was the proper term bc fuck the military, but u guys know what i mean lmfaooo)

(disclaimer if u use these types of affirmations and they work for you, go for it. but i used them for a while and they just weren’t it for me. carry on)

i guess what i’m trying to say is, those affirmations weren’t making me feel good. they weren’t making me feel like a “boss ass bitch”. they were making me feel...like a bitch. and strangely, powerless. i’d say these affirmations, or just bland ones where i wasn’t necessarily demanding my sp to throw himself at my feet and kiss my shoes and tell me he is nothing without me, and ultimately, if i wasn’t feeling resentment, i was feeling...nothing. 

once again, i want to make this so so so clear, you don’t need to be happy to manifest. but my belief? if your affirmations aren’t making you feel joy, or excitement, or contentment, then what’s the fucking point? if you think of your desire, and don’t feel positive feelings about it, then you might have lost your way a little. 

don’t worry!! it’s an easy fix. easy, and even...fun? rewarding? comforting? i just want you to take some time--laying in bed at night is the perfect time to do this in my experience--to think about why you want your desire so badly. do you want money? think of how great life is going to be once you have it. of all the stuff you’re going to buy, for yourself, and maybe even for others. don’t focus on the problems you want to fix with it right now. think of that clothing item you’ve had your eye on, or that book you’ve been wanting to read but haven’t felt like “wasting” money on. think of how excited you are to buy those things, because you’re going to! think of the good. not the bad.

remember: you create more of what you focus on. focus on the good, get the good. focus more on the bad...get more of the bad. 

your manifestation is done. it is created. it is on it’s way to you. it is here! all there’s left to do is feel excited. it’ll be here any moment now, how fucking exciting is that! it’s safe for you to be happy. it’s safe for you to focus on the feelings you would have if you had it, rather than focus on affirming specifically to bring it to you. it is safe to be happy. 

i used to affirm solely for contact, all day every day, and sometimes i’d get it. but it’d be short lived, my sp would be distant, etc. but then once i started focusing on truly living in the end and basking in my love for my sp, thinking about how perfect and amazing he is, i not only got contact (without having to specifically affirm for it), but he was actively engaged in our conversations, making up new topics to keep the conversation going, asking me about and expressing interest in my hobbies and interests, bringing up and reminiscing on old memories of our previous relationship, complimenting me, flirting with me, asking me to hang out, etc. shit i was not getting when i was “he is so fucking in love with me and he’s texting me right fucking now”-ing all day long. i started focusing on how amazing and perfect and good to me he was, and that’s exactly what i got in my reality. who would’ve thunk? 

and you know what? yeah, he fucking loves me. he misses me and he wants to be with me. but that’s a given. but that doesn’t fucking matter. i am the only person who matters in my reality!! sure he loves me, but do i love him??? that’s what the universe wants to know. that’s what truly fucking matters. the universe brings me my desires. so i’m gonna fucking desire it! 

guys, please trust me on this. just try it out, with whatever you’re manifesting. this could be what you’re missing. this could bring your manifestation to you. i promise, if you’re like i was and feel resententment or anger or hatred towards your desire, this is going to make you feel so fucking good. just stick with this for a week or two. i promise, you’ll see movement.

and remember, there is no one to change but self. don’t change them (or it), change your perception of them (or it). 

let’s make manifesting fun again!!! it’s the perfect tool to bring happiness into your life. so fucking let it!!!! 

so no, you don’t need to be happy in order to manifest. but....maybe, just maybe, prioritizing your happiness isn’t such a bad thing. i mean, who doesn’t want to be happy?

[plant-flwrs]

Heyy!! I wish you would write a fic where Fred is lowkey really into Shakespear and Romeo and Juliet and tries to woo the reader cs she’s muggleborn? Idk but it would be so cute!! 🥺

romeo and juliet // fred weasley

masterlist!

summary: Fred reads Romeo and Juliet and can’t help but fall in love

a/n: schools out, so hopefully that means more time for writing! thanks for the request anon i thought it was adorable, hope you like it!!

(2.5k)

At first, it was a secret. Fred had no intention of actually enjoying it. He had simply accepted the book Professor Lupin had lent him, thumbed through it, and stayed up all night to read it by accident.

Maybe it was because Lupin had seen the way Fred looked at you across the class, separated by hidden bloodlines and upbringings. You, with your muggle pens that you smuggled in. You, with your muggle records you used an entire bag to carry onto the train. You, with your muggle magazines that spread through the common room like wildfire. You, with those weird little things called cigarettes that you sold in your third year to the older students. You, with the way the older pureblood witches would sit and ask you to do their hair for them because only you could do all the newest muggle styles. You, with your reluctance to Quidditch but your love for soccer.

Fred was gone, absolutely gone for you. He was even more behind than usual in class because he couldn't help but find you with his eyes, no matter the room you were in or the distance between you both. Remus Lupin, the secret romantic, asked Fred to stay after class.

"Mr. Weasley," Professor Lupin called, feet kicked up on his desk while he levitated a novel wandlessly in front of him. A half-eaten apple rested on a napkin beside a chocolate wrapper and Fred was forced to remember the breakfast he had barely eaten, choosing to instead pretend he hadn't noticed the fact you had only sat a few seats away.

Fred stood in front of Lupin's desk, waiting as the room emptied out and George shot him a wink from the doorway.

"Yes, Professor?" Fred rocked on his feet, hands stuffed in the pockets of his robe. He tried not to wonder if you had noticed that he had been called behind, or if you had noticed him at all. He vaguely registered that this might what his brother would call 'pathetic'.

"You never turned in that essay on wandless defenses," Lupin said slowly, the book moving to rest on his desk as he moved his feet to the ground.

Fred was quiet, biting the inside of his cheek as he couldn't seem to recall the last time a teacher had bothered to talk to him about his assignments instead of deeming him a 'lost cause' or a student who 'simply wouldn't apply themselves'.

Professor Lupin sighed, moving again to stand. Fred thought he caught a flash of pain on the professor's face, perhaps a wince as he stood, but the moment was gone before Lupin was giving Fred a calculating and sympathetic glance.

"Do you need an extension?" Remus offered, leaning his hip against the desk and inclining his head to show Fred the importance of this offering.

"I'd appreciate that, Professor," Fred admitted.

They were silent again, Remus still looking at Fred like he was something to figure out. Remus shifted, eyes dropped to his desk and lips lifting.

"What's got you so preoccupied?"

Fred was blushing before he could think of a lie, and then he realized he didn't want to lie. He hadn't even told George about his crush on you- no doubt it was obvious. Fred had had flings and crushes on loads of girls, all fun and easy, but this felt heavier. He didn't want to have a fling with you.

"I guess-" Fred sighed, removing his hands from his robes and wiping them on his trousers, "I've just been distracted recently. A lot on my mind."

"Ah," Remus smiled fondly, nodding slowly.

A book began to move from a pile in the corner, elegantly and easily avoiding the tall stacks of clutter and various lumps of papers to levitate to Fred. Fred reached out for it, moving it in his hand to read the cover. Romeo and Juliet.

"I'll make you a deal, Fred," Professor Lupin said, his voice sounding so mischievous that Fred was surprised he hadn't become ten years younger right in front of him. "You can either write the essay on wandless defenses, or you can read that and write an essay on 'Romeo and Juliet'."

Fred thumbed through the book, eyebrows furrowed. He had never liked reading, most of the books at the Burrow belonged to Bill, Percy, or his father. He was pretty sure that George would find Fred reading Shakespeare to be just as funny as the time they released Cornish Pixies in the Slytherin changing rooms.

"Yeah, alright."

Fred managed to eat dinner that night, with you safely at the opposite end of the table. The curtains to his fourposter had been closed for hours and the light from his wand had been steadily bright for just as long. He had gone from laying on his back, head propped up beneath his arms, to resting his back against the headboard, to sitting upright in the center of his bed, head propped on his fist, to laying on his stomach, to laying on his back again with his head at the foot of his bed, and soon enough, the sun was flooding through a crack in the curtains. He had just finished Romeo and Juliet when he heard the showers starting.

"Lupin!"

Remus stopped and watched Fred catch up to him. He looked tired and simultaneously wide awake, his hair was a mess, and Remus was almost certain that he was wearing his pajama pants beneath his school robes.

"Mr. Weasley," Remus said cordially, continuing his walk to the greenhouse.

"I wanted to talk to you about that book you lent me-"

"Oh, you can keep it, if you'd like. I've read it dozens of times."

Fred hesitated, a wide smile spreading over his face, "Oh, thanks, Professor! It's just, I wanted to tell you I really liked it."

"You've finished it, then?" Remus asked with an impressed smile.

"Read it last night," Fred admitted, somewhat embarrassed.

"I look forward to the essay, then," Lupin said with a kind smile and a nod, turning into the greenhouses and leaving Fred in the corridor.

Inside his robes, he felt the weight of the tiny book against his chest. He kept it in a pocket there, fingers itching to hold it and read it again.

He couldn't help the roaring thoughts in his head. The idea that you were his Juliet, that you and he could find a hidden love, just for you two, amongst your external differences. He was oddly disappointed by the ending and decided he might not completely finish the book if he read it again, perhaps pretend it ended differently. He leaned his back against the stone wall behind him, fighting a blushing smile from his face.

So, Fred loved Shakespeare in secret. He loved reading in secret. He loved the weight of the book in his hands in secret. He loved the words and the phrases in secret. He loved the way it made him think in secret. He loved you in secret. He loved in secret.

Until you started dating Thomas Meadowbrooke. Thomas was a Ravenclaw, wickedly smart, handsome, kind, and the victim of many of the Weasley twins' pranks for a while. George didn't directly ask Fred why they were suddenly pranking this one boy so relentlessly all of a sudden, but he didn't need to.

Thomas wore blazers with patches on the elbows and combed his silky hair down the middle. He always had a flower in his coat pocket to give to you and he always carried a book of poetry with him. He was sensitive and wistful in all the ways girls loved, including you.

You thought Thomas was painfully boring. He would fawn over you in the most annoying ways, giving you poems that he wrote (horrendously awful, they were) and quoting lines from old and boring books to you. He didn't listen to Joan Jett or Janis Joplin and he cringed when you played your records. He suggested Bach or Debussy instead. He was boring.

You had only agreed to go out with him because he asked. Thomas Meadowbrooke may have been able to put a cornish pixie to sleep just by talking to it, but he was undeniably handsome. Well, he was more handsome before he had fallen victim to a particularly entertaining Weasley twin prank that turned his hair gelled and spiked up for a few days.

You broke up with Thomas soon after. He took it well, saying it gave him fuel to finish some poetry he hadn't been inspired enough for before.

Remus heard this gossip quite excitedly.

"She did, did she?" Remus tilted his head, a coy smirk on his lips.

The smell of fertilizer was strong, but he learned not to mind it as he watched the merry witch digging in various pots.

"He was quite heartbroken, the poor thing. Filius said that when he did routine bed checks, he could hear Thomas crying for weeks!" Professor Sprout sighed, patting down the soil and checking for weeds.

"Teen romance is always quite fickle," Remus commented, following Pomona as she moved to the next pot.

"Says you!" Pomona playfully scolded Remus, her red cheeks filling as she smiled.

Remus chuckled, thinking back to Sirius who would sneak into his office later to distract him from grading papers.

"You know, Pomona," Remus said in that voice of his, the one that got Sprout to drop her trowel and lean in close to hear the latest gossip. "I think Fred Weasley's got a bit of a crush on Y/n."

Pomona gasped, dirty hand flying to cover her mouth. She paused, scrunching up her face and sticking her tongue out to spit out the clump of dirt.

"He hasn't!" she continued, not minding Remus' amused smile and the clean rag he offered her to wipe her hands.

"He's always staring at her," Remus said, thinking on it. "I reckon he's quite the secret romantic."

Pomona cooed and awed as she continued to tend to her plants, she and Remus trading anymore gossip that they could think of.

The weather changed at quite a convenient time for Fred. With the slightly warm but still a bit chilled fall weather, Fred could dawn his lighter coats. His lighter coats that happened to have wonderfully shaped pockets on the inside, just the right size for a book.

Fred wondered if you had gone out with Thomas because Ravenclaw book nerds were your type, or if you had broken up with him because Ravenclaw book nerds weren't your type. Fred had spent almost all of the warm weather contemplating how he was going to continue to live if he was determined to remain secretly in love with you. By fall he had figured it out.

Fred wasn't going to hide anything, not the books he had recently begun to love, or the way he loved so strongly. He wasn't going to miss meals because you were so distracting. He wasn't going to suffocate under his crush on you.

It was a beautiful day. George was up in the dorms with Lee working on a prank and Fred had decided to take a walk down to the Black Lake. His lighter coat was a bit heavier because of the book in the pocket, and Fred pushed his hair out of his eyes as he looked down at the ground to avoid stepping on tree roots. He found a nice spot beneath a tree, resting against the trunk and reading.

"Hey, Fred," a voice called, coming closer as they easily avoided the maze of tree roots.

Fred looked up to see you, in those perfect muggle clothes you wore any chance you could, hair styled in that wonderful muggle way, one of those muggle cigarettes tucked behind your ear, walking towards him.

"Hey," he responded, surprised by how easy his voice sounded.

"Have you been reviewing at all for Lupin's?" You sat next to Fred like it was the easiest thing in the world, brushing your shoulder against his.

"No, not really," Fred closed his book with his thumb tucked between the pages saving his spot.

"Mmm," you hummed, leaning your head back against the tree and closing your eyes. "What're you reading?"

"Romeo and Juliet," Fred replied, looking at your profile while he had the chance.

"Didn't think that was your thing," you said playfully, opening one eye to catch Fred looking at you.

He flushed and turned his gaze to his hands in his lap. "Me neither," he admitted, swallowing.

"I always liked ‘The Taming of the Shrew’, personally."

Fred smiled to himself, because of course, you had also read Shakespeare, and of course, you would have a cool favorite.

"I like that one, too," Fred said lamely, enjoying the way you were smiling at him.

By winter, Fred had devised a plan. It was perfect, more perfect than any prank he had created or any Zonko's product he had bought. He would die if he kept all this love to himself, so he decided all he needed was one kiss.

The Yule Ball was in full swing, the classical and slow music long forgotten as everyone moved to the dance floor and rocked to the loud and fast rhythm. Fred had seen you when you first arrived, noticing with glee that you were alone, and hadn't lost sight of you since. He had removed himself from the heavily crowded dance floor, stumbling to the table with the juice he and George had spiked hours earlier. He loosened the collar of his robes and pushed his already disheveled hair out of his face.

You watched Fred move through the crowd like a tornado, a mass of energy that you felt required to look at and admire. He strode to the table, a quiet and self-satisfied smirk on his lips as he took a long sip of punch.

Fred caught you staring at him with pleasant unexpectedness. You looked just as beautiful as you did when the night started, skin glowing and everything dawned upon you with your magical muggle-ness. Fred put his cup down, a comfortable pink hue warming his cheeks, and approached you. He touched his hand to yours.

"Hey, Fred," you said with an entertained smirk, glancing down at his hand on yours.

"I need you to do me a favor," he slurred, voice easy and breath warm as it landed on your skin.

"What kind of favor?"

"I need you to kiss me," Fred pulled his mouth away from your ear, looking to your face.

He didn't have much of an opportunity, though, before your lips were on his and you stole his breath. He tasted of the spiked punch and his hands were trembling and careful as they rested on your waist. You grabbed a fistful of his robes, pulling him close to you with urgency.

He pulled away, lips red and swollen, with his eyes still closed.

"I need you to do me a favor," you said, mouth hovering above his.

"Yeah?"

"Kiss me," you whispered, just loud enough for Fred to hear.

He listened, and held onto you with less trembling and more confidence as you kissed for the second time.

[bonny-kookoo]

Under Your Skin (JJK x Reader) | 🔞

Pairing: Tattoo Artist!Goth/Punk!Jeon Jungkook x Secretary!Shy!Reader

Genre: Tattoo artist!AU, Badboy x Sweetgirl AU, Idk what else

Tags/Warnings: Ultimate goodboy Kook, He looks grr but is actually sweet, shy reader, smol reader, Kookers is WHIPPED, Also a tease, Dom!Jungkook because how could I not, Sub!Reader, Babygirl!Reader, Its not heavy on the whole ddlg-stuff but yeah they be having some vibes y'know, don't come @ me don't I'm not forcing you to read it lol, anyways moving on, because smut, yes I mean it's my content, and yall nasty admit it, slight hair pulling, manhandling also only a little, oral (f & m receiving), praising, mentions of emotional and physical insecurities, but Kook be supportive so we good, back to the nasty, body worship yes pls, biting, fingering, because why not, protected sex because we keep it clean in this household, light-hearted sex, kook being a romantic goof, yeah I think thats it?

Summary: Jungkook looks like absolute trouble; like one wrong look could set him off, and turn him into an absolute murderer. But oh well, ever heard the phrase 'Never judge a book by its cover'?

A/N: you might have noticed me only putting one emoji up top. I have decided to from now on only mark my adult fics with emojis (which is basically almost every single one lets be real). Also; stop reading my fucking fics if any of the tagged/warned things make you uncomfortable. I'm tired of everyone clowning in my inbox telling me how disgusting ddlg/smut content is. You can't even tell me you 'read it by accident' because that's why I'm always putting the cut underneath my fics =) so pls go finish preschool and then we can maybe shake hands. Maybe not. Covid and all. Yeah.

On the outside, Jeon Jungkook seems like absolute trouble.

He's working at a tattoo and piercing studio, dresses in all black, clattering chains and heavy boots always alerting everyone around of his presence. His long black hair is never truly tamed, his nails painted black, and his face expressionless most of the time. He's a talented artist and well trained piercer, always visiting conventions to keep up with the newest trends, styles, and equipment there is. He takes his job seriously- and is proud of it, knowing that he had proven his family wrong by now. They had been worried about him; especially his mother had scolded him that he shouldn't throw his time away trying to make it in a world of art many had already failed. But last year, he had finally invited them over to his rather nice apartment, showing them that he was living a good life, with nothing to really worry about.

Jungkook had made it.

Well, not quite.

Because as of currently, Jungkook had a new mission, a new goal.

"Ah, Jungkook!" You say, eyes sparkling as you smile at him when he enters the shop he works at. You had recently started to work there as well, since Taehyung was absolute shit at keeping files in order and track of schedules. You hadn't applied for the job specifically, that's at least what his coworker had told him- he had known you prior already, and was aware that you had wanted a change these days.

And Jungkook had been painfully crushing on you ever since you started.

"Your schedule for the week is already here- I uhm.. didn't put it on your desk cause, I didn't want to intrude your space and all.." You say, giving him a small black booklet where you always noted down his appointments. He appreciated it a lot- knowing how much of a hassle it could be to move dates back and forth just to somehow make it fit. You always made sure that he had enough time in between multiple daily pieces in case something took longer or less so you could make sure to be able to move things accordingly. You didn't want him to get overworked, you had said. He had smiled.

"Thanks- and you can go inside, no problem." He says, and you nod. "I know you don't make a mess, like someone else here." He says, hinting at Namjoon, who was known to be quite clumsy- yet a mastermind when it came to designing pieces he struggled with. Jungkook stayed at your front desk for a bit, making you tilt your head a bit, as you tried not to stare. He always took so much care of himself, you would have had to be blind not to see how attractive he actually was. But then again, you didn't get your hopes up- after all, he was nice to almost everyone around. "You've never been in there, right?" He asks, and you shake your head. You haven't been in his space at all- too scared to invade his privacy and making him upset in the process. "I mean- you got time right now? I can show you around." He casually tells you, and you look at your computer screen in front of you. Everything had been filed for today- so you probably had a bit of time to spare.

"Sure." You said, taking your phone and standing up from your chair, making sure to lock the pc so no one would accidentally make a mess out of your tabs. Or worse; close them. God knows all hell would break loose.

Jungkook had to really force himself not to let out any noise as you walked next to him.

You were so tiny next to him.

He wasn't that tall to be honest- with Namjoon and Taehyung both taller than him, he knew he was average at best. And for the longest time, he'd had a thing for tall girls, all elegant and confident. He still liked their aesthetic, yes- but now that he spotted you, he could really see the appeal of having a shorter significant other.

You were so cute.

You carefully stepped inside when Jungkook lifted the curtain that was used instead of a door, surprised to see how.. organized everything was. A little.. off- some things seemed to be randomly put somewhere, but in general, it seemed like everything had their proper spot. "I like to have it like this." He comments, and you nod your head to that, finally spotting his tattoo-gun. It was made out of purple steel- polished, and changing its hue depending on how you looked at it. It was absolutely beautiful, even though you had a rather limited understanding of these things. "Was a present from Taehyung last year." Jungkook says, sitting down on his chair. "I never asked- are you inked at all?" He asks, leaning backwards as you stand there a little awkwardly. "You can sit down somewhere, don't be so tense." He chuckles, and you look around, before you sit on the stretcher across from him. You shake your head, and Jungkook isn't surprised. Your pink converse sway back and forth as you sit on the stretcher, legs too short to reach the floor anymore as you rest your hands underneath your thighs; hem of your dress revealing more of them than he can usually see.

"I don't have any tattoos yet, but I've been talking to Namjoon about it." You said, and Jungkooks saliva tastes a little bitter at that. He doesn't want to pout or give away that it's bugging him at all that you're not talking to him about it- but he fails miserably. "Namjoon actually said I should talk to you about it, since the style I want fits you best." You say, and he can't hide his smile, bunny teeth on full display as he leans forward a bit.

"You'd let me tattoo you?" He asks, and you shrug, before nodding. "What do you have in Mind?" He instantly asks, not even bothering to hide his excitement.

If only you knew that it's because of you; and not just because he's gonna be the first to ink you.

You've both agreed on a design you want, and Jungkook can't deny that he thinks it's absolutely perfect on you.

"Are you scared?" Jungkook asks you as he prepares everything, his sweater's sleeves rolled up, revealing his own body art to you, as well as some bracelets; one that you recognize as the wooden-bead bracelet you had gifted him last year for his birthday. It was weird to see him wear it.

"I.. no. Just nervous." You say. "I'm worried I might cry and make a fool out of myself." You say with a laugh, and Jungkook chuckles, placing a reassuring and warm hand on your upper arm.

"It's fine. I've seen grown man cry like kids on this stretcher before." He casually says. "Don't worry; I won't think any less of you just because of some tears." He says with a smile, and you nod, turning your head to look at his room's walls instead; covered in drawings, sketches, and pictures of finished works he was most proud of. "Do you want anything to hold onto?" He asks, as he starts to shave the skin of your thigh to make sure he can work as best as possible. He's so into his work, so concentrated on doing everything perfect, that he doesn't even take much into account that you're laying in only your panties and oversized sweater; skirt neatly placed on a chair in the corner of the room, to get it out of the way.

"It's fine" You mumble, although you really want to. So instead you curl your fingers around the fabric of your sweater- something that doesn't go unnoticed by Jungkook, who decides not to comment on it for now. He simply throws the one-time razor away as well as the tissues used to clean your skin, before he carefully places the tracing paper onto where he seems fit.

"I think it would look great right here." He says lowly, carefully removing the paper to reveal the lines he's gonna trace with his gun in a few minutes. "You wanna look at it again?" He asks, and you shake your head. "Alright." He says, before he gets up and walks out his room; only to return with your small squishy and round unicorn plush that's usually sitting on your desk. "To hold onto." He winks, and you chuckle at that.

Jungkook really pays attention.

"So, Taehyung has told me you're a bit younger than me." Jungkook says to start casual chit-chat, trying to help your nervousness as his tattoo-gun starts to buzz to live. "Only a Year if I remember correctly." He says, and you nod.

"Yeah.." You say, and can't hide your dissapoinment flooding your voice. Jungkook, until now, only had relationships with girls older than him. He's even said before that he just likes having someone older than him around- which made you even more nervous around him.

"You sound upset about that." He chuckles, and gently holds onto your thigh as you jump a bit when he first presses the tip of the gun down. "Sorry. I'll be gentle." He lowly tells you, and you swallow.

Not the time Y/N, not the time.

"Uhm.." You say, fingers digging into the squishy plush in your hands. "I.. there's someone I like, but he.. only likes older girls, so.." You say, and Jungkook glances at you. You're already interested in someone? He continues to trace the lines, wiping afterwards to get the excess ink and blood off. "But I mean, then again I don't think I have a chance with him anyways." You chuckle, and Jungkook can't help but shake his head. Even if you're interested in someone else, he shouldn't let you have thoughts like that.

"Highly doubt that." He says. "If he doesn't see you, he's blind." He tells you, and you giggle, glad that he's able to make you feel a bit better about everything. "I'm serious." He says, and you nod at that, watching his inked arm flex every now and then as he draws with absolute concentration; black facemask hiding half of his face. You can see the way his eyebrows furrow, eyes fixated on his work as he moves with absolute routine. "Do I know the guy?" He casually asks, before he dips the tip of his gun in the tiny pot of ink again.

You don't know what to say.

He looks at you for a second, and decides not to dig. "You don't have to tell me. Sorry if I seemed nosy; didn't mean to." He apologizes, and you shake your head to let him know its fine. It's quiet for a moment afterwards, only the buzzing of his gun and your occasional whine of pain. "Sorry; it'll hurt a bit more now since I'm getting close to your inner thigh- that's always a little more sensitive." He comments, and you really hope he doesn't pay much attention to your panties.

When you can see his eyes stick to them for a second, you really want to just disappear.

He doesn't comment on it though. What is he suppsosed to say? He really doesn't want to make you uncomfortable, and considering that you already have a crush on someone else, he doesn't want to get himself in too deep as well. He simply works away, finally finishing the thin and delicate outlines of your piece- the first step, before he will see you again for color and shading. He finally connects the last line, and doesn't think twice about what he says next.

"Good girl."

It takes a second that feels way too long for the both of you to register the words, and Jungkook quickly occupies himself with turning off his gun and cleaning up your skin and his workspace to get the awkwardness out of his room. You try to instantly stand up, but his palm holds onto your leg- silently ordering you to stay put, which you do. He rubs something over the piece, before he gently lifts your leg to wrap it. "I'll give you a bottle of lotion for it. Leave that bandage on for.. I'd say until tomorrow morning at least. Afterwards, apply the lotion everyday to help it heal properly." He lectures you with a gentle voice, before letting you sit up.

"Thanks." You say, grinning eagerly at the now hidden artwork on your leg. Jungkook chuckles.

"We're not done yet, but I'll take it." He says. "I uh.." He starts, as you jump off the stretcher and go to take on your skirt. "uhm, you up for some fast food?" He asks, a bit hurried, before he can chicken out again. And he hates himself for a moment, because you had literally told him just half an hour before that you already had interest in someone else. But maybe you were too innocent to get his innuendo, maybe you wouldn't get that he was asking you on a date-

"Like a date?" You ask, and he really wants to hit himself.

"I mean, if you want it to be?" He says, swallowing as he averts his gaze, a sight very weird. His hand runs through his hair, chain around his neck and piercings on his ears clattering against each other and making sounds as he moves, his combat boots nervously tapping the floor a little. "It doesn't have to be.. I know you're already-"

"I'd love to." You say however, now fully dressed again, as you grin with your bright sparkling eyes.

And Jungkook feels like he's won the lottery.

It's your third time laying on Jungkooks' stretcher like this- waiting for him to work on your art, finishing it today. But the energy is different.

Things are different between you two in general.

After some casual movie dates and rounds of overwatch, Jungkook had admitted to you that he had a crush. It was rushed, while he was driving, so he didn't have to look at you and instantly get hit by your reaction. But then, you had told him that you felt the same- and the two of you agreed to let things process from then on. Whatever would happen; you would let happen.

And Jungkook was starting to flirt with you.

It was a little weird to get close to him like that. While everyone seeing you two was a little taken aback- with your dresses and skirts, and colorful and almost childish personality, he seemed like the absolute opposite- quiet, all dark and dangerous while carrying your milkshake so you could put your phone away into your purse.

"Alright doll, let's finish this." He said with newfound enthusiasm, winking at you as you laughed at his demeanor.

"You seemed more excited than me!" You say, and he chuckles. "You're really desperate to have me gone?" You say in a playfully upset tone, and he simply huffs out a breath, before cockily looking at you for a second.

"That's not true." He says. "I'd just rather have you laid out somewhere else than in my studio, that's all." He casually says, and you shut your mouth at that, cheeks red as he laughs at your cute display of embarrassment. He routinely prepares your skin, before he starts his gun. "Too much?" He asks, and you know he's not talking about the pressure of his ink filled gun on your skin.

"No-" You start, and he now seriously speaks to you, voice a bit muffled through his facemask.

"Please tell me if I ever make you uncomfortable." He says. "You're not upsetting me if you tell me I'm going to far." He says, and you nod, knowing that he now needs a proper answer. Jungkook is way more attentive and romantic than people may think he is. He's a gentleman pulled out of a dictionary- careful and gentle with you, and always keen on getting to know you for you, and not for the person you like to portray yourself as. He wants to know what you like, what you don't like, what you dream of, and what you hate about yourself.

"Don't worry- I will." You say, watching him work on your skin. "Jungkook?" You ask, and he hums a reply to let you know he's listening. "Is it okay if I sleep?" You ask, and he chuckles.

"Didn't I tell you not to stay up for too long before I left yesterday?" He teasingly retorts back to you, and you pout at him- with no hard feelings behind it. He had left last night after eating with you for dinner at your place; and he did indeed tell you to go to sleep a little earlier since he knew you would have an early shift today, opening up the store. "I'm really tempted to say no." He says, eyes now on your skin again as he dips the tip of his gun in a pot of color. "You know, as punishment for not listening." He mumbles, and you almost don't catch it.

Almost.

"Jungkook?" Taehyung stands in his doorway, finally finding him sitting at his desk. "Oh?" He says in a surprised tone, spotting your sleeping figure on his coworkers lap- head resting against the inside of his shoulder, with your arms around his middle.

"Yeah?" Jungkook asks, not at all shy or fazed by the fact that Taehyung is looking at you. "What is it?" He asks again, as Taehyung smiles, giving the younger man his small booklet that you usually give him every morning.

"Nothing left for today." He said. "Just wanted to tell you good work and send you home." The older one explains, zipping up his own jacket. "Guess she'll be coming with you?" He asks teasingly, but Jungkook doesn't bite the bait at all.

"Yeah. Don't burn the house down while we're gone, you two. " He says, slipping the booklet into his pocket before he pats your back. "Come on doll, let's go home." He tells you, waking you up at least enough to put on your shoes and lead you out the store to his car.

He buckles your seatbelt as the engine comes alive, radio playing its tune softly in the background as he drives you home. "You awake doll?" He asks, and you nod your head, turning towards him with barely open eyes. "You haven't had anything proper to eat today, so I'll make us some ramen at my place, ok?" He asks, and you nod, before your eyebrows scrunch up. "What is it?" He chuckles, and you now grow more awake.

"Wait- but if we eat at yours then you're gonna have to drive me home late." You say, and he shrugs. "Noo, Kook, what if you crash the car because you're sleepy?" You tell him with a whine, genuinely concerned for him, as he has the audacity to laugh. "Kookie, it's not funny I swear to god-!" You say, and he apologizes.

"I mean." He starts, casually dropping what he had wanted to ask you for a couple of weeks now. "You could always just stay over." He tells you, and you look at him, meeting his gaze at the red light he stops at, his head turned towards you for a moment until the lights turn green again.

"We.. would have to stop at mine so I could get some stuff though.." You mumble, and Jungkook looks at you with newfound enthusiasm, setting his turning lights to enter a different road.

It's in a parking lot that you first unintentionally confront him with your biggest insecurities and flaws.

You've tripped over a stray stone you didn't see laying on the ground, leading you to fall onto your hands and scraping your knees open. Just like any normal human being, you dust yourself off, instantly hoping that Jungkook inside the shop hadn't seen you fail at something so basic as walking. You had carried some of the items you two had bought into the car while also returning the shopping cart while he had payed- and by the look on his face, he had definitely seen you.

He wasn't laughing, or hiding his grin, or anything alike. He looked concerned, taking his card back from the cashier before walking out the store, jogging towards you, who sat in the open trunk, ready to get laughed at. Even though somewhere deep in your mind you didn't think he would, past experiences had led to you now having that fear, no matter with whom. "Are you okay?" Jungkook asks, looking at you as he squats down to take a look at your bleeding knees. He reaches into one of the shopping bags, taking out a water bottle and a pack of tissues, before he wets it, one hand holding your leg by the backside of your knee, while the other carefully cleans the small wound. "You gotta be careful Baby." He chuckles a little- nothing like the laughter you had expected.

"I'm fine." You say, not looking up at him.

"It's okay to cry, you know?" He says, and you stay quiet, trying not to breathe too much as you desperately hold them back. "I won't laugh." He promises, deciding not to look at you as to give you a bit more space.

"People will stare though.." You quietly murmur towards him, and he finishes his job, before he goes to throw the now used tissue away in a nearby trashcan. When he returns, he's taking his jacket off, the item way too large on your form as he throws it over you, pulling the hood up as you look at him for the first time since your little accident, eyes sparkling with unshed tears when he pulls the sides of the hood towards him a little. "There." He says, a reassuring smile on his face. "Now no one can see you but me." He tells you. "And I will never, ever, laugh at you." He promises, and pulls your head against his chest, as you start to let go.

He really hates to see you cry- but he's glad that you're letting him in enough to let him see you this way.

Jungkook is frustrated.

He tries not to really show it, because he doesn't want to blow up in your face like that, but then again, you're kind of the reason he feels the way he does. Because even though he thought you both had a genuine connection, you're yet to let him touch you.

And not just hugging and holding hands.

It's not that he's impatient- its because he knows you, at one point, wanted him that way as well. But something happened, something he didn't notice, that made you take ten steps backwards from him. You seemed to be retreating, giving up, and he has no idea what he had done to make you react that way.

As far as he knows, he had done everything right.

But then he sees them; the messages sent back and forth between you and Hana, a returning customer at the shop- well known to flirt with everyone around here. Jungkook himself had actually considered hooking up with her once a year back, simply to make her shut up, but then again, he wasn't into one-night-stands. And she had never truly been his type anyways.

'Ah yeah, just re-schedule that then, I don't mind at all! Just make sure we have enough time together, since we haven't had time to catch up on things recently, if you know what I mean.' She had sent, a week ago; exactly the timeframe you had started to distance yourself. He knew he shouldn't look into it, but then again- this was his business too. He had the right to know.

'Sure? I can give you an appointment at around 4 PM then, so you'll be the last one. Would that be okay with you? Again, sorry for re-scheduling on such short notice.' You had written, and Jungkook can't decide if you had been oblivious to her implication (which was bullshit), or if you were simply too polite to call her out. But it's the next messages that make him fume.

'Again, no troubles. As I said, I only care that its Jungkookie, I don't really trust anyone else with my body that way ;). 4 PM is perfect, you guys still close at around 6 PM right? He's got skilled hands, I'm sure we don't need much more time, if you know what I mean.' she has the audacity to write.

But its your answer that makes him fume.

'Good to know.'

"Jungkook?" You say, looking at the screen, as you suddenly dash forwards, trying to shut the screen off- as if that would make any difference. But he catches your wrist with ease, holding it in his palm as he looks at you.

"Do you think I'm sleeping with her?" He asks, and you try to escape his grasp; and he lets you, staying at your workspace however as he keeps you locked in place with his gaze. "Y/N." He urges, making you look away from him.

"It's none of my business." You say, shrugging. "I.. No, it's-" You start, but he cuts you off.

"No, finish that sentence. 'No' what?" He says, and you've never heard him talk like that.

"I just.. didn't think you'd.. do that." You meekly say, murmuring it as he tilts your head gently upwards to look at him; his face now more relaxed as he softly smiles.

"That's good that you think that way." He tells you. "Because I don't do that at all." He says. "She likes to start drama all the time- was probably bitter I turned her down so much. You know what?" He suddenly says, turning towards the screen as he clicks to change the account, opening his own Inbox as he starts to write an E-Mail.

'Appointment is cancelled, be glad I'm not suing you for defamation. JK.'

"Jungkook-" You say, trying to get him not to send it- but it's already gone. "Why would you do that? Just because I misunderstood?" You whine, and he chuckles, shutting down the system as he looks at the clock, signaling that it's closing time.

"No." He says. "But because I don't want her around anyways, and this gives me a proper reason." He tells you, ruffling your hair as he looks at you. "You coming?" He asks, and you nod, taking your bag and coat before following him out the shop.

In the car, you finally speak up. "Jungkook?" You ask, and he hums out a reply. "Do you.. think I'm attractive?" You ask, and he clears his throat at the unexpected question.

"I- what?" He asks, unsure what you mean.

"Just.. Namjoon said, that he thinks you.. see me as a friend only? Because I'm nothing like the girls you dated before.. If I misunderstood something here then Oh my god-" You start to ramble, and Jungkook laughs suddenly.

"You think I'm not into you?" He asks, and you shrug. "Of course I want to fuck you doll." He casually comments, and you can't help but feel your cheeks redden. "Wait- did you really think I didn't?" He asks, face showing genuine horror as he looks over at you.

"I mean.. you never really initiated anything so I thought.." You started, and he groans out.

Thank god you're staying the night.

"Looks so pretty, does it?" He hums out, palm running over the tattoo on your thigh, delicate lines and well-placed shadings complimenting the colors perfectly. "You know why I love it most?" He starts, hand suddenly gripping the flesh for a moment, before he pulls you closer on his lap by the small of your back. "Because that's mine." He says, before he leans in, placing an open mouthed kiss against your pulse. "The ink that's under your skin, the design, the idea-" He mumbles against your skin. "And the body it's drawn on." You whine at his tone, dark and low, as he urges you back and forth on his clothed thigh- your panties suddenly feeling uncomfortable. "Isn't it like that, baby?" He asks, and you nod, furiously, and he chuckles. "Hm, you seem out of breath baby.." He grins at you, like a predator.

"Jungkook.." You whine, not knowing what you're asking for.

He wordlessly moves, helping you lay down on his bed before he crawls over you, his lips instantly attached to the skin of your neck, hands helping you out of your dress wordlessly, as he can't help but let his gaze linger on your body for a moment. "I can't believe that-" He says, pulling off your overknee socks. "-you'd ever think of yourself anything less than perfect." He says, placing a gentle kiss to the colorful image now forever placed under your skin by his skilled hands. He continues to display his affection over your skin, wandering over your stomach up to your chest, where he playfully bites just above your breast. He struggles with the front of your bra for a second, unsure how to open the undergarment without breaking it, as you help a little; letting them spring free. But only for a moment.

Because in the next, he's got them in his hands, palms gently moving over them, feeling their softness as he groans. "You're so sweet." he comments, as he finally kisses your lips, smile interrupting him every now and then. "So soft." Another kiss. "So delicate." Another one. "And all mine, yeah?" He asks, and you nod, smiling as he grins back, the expression making him look so young and carefree you can't help but wonder how anyone could ever think he's a bad man.

He's anything but.

He's so careful touching you, so delicate in moving his palms over your skin, as if its the most divine thing he's ever felt. He's still smiling, as if in a trance, while he can't stop kissing you. Your hands move into his hair- way softer than you thought it would be, and he groans into your mouth at the feeling of your fingers running over his scalp.

There's no urgency in anything he does.

He slowly moves again, hands opening your legs for him as he sits back on his heels, playfully pulling you closer by the backs of your knees, making you giggle. "You sound so sweet baby." He tells you, innocently, as if he's not currently placing his hand onto your center, ring finger collecting your already leaking wetness before he spreads it, moving his thumb over your most sensitive bundle of nerves while his ring finger enters you slowly. You whine at the feeling, not enough to get you as riled up as you'd like to be. Also; this is the first time you're genuinely experiencing foreplay. You don't know what to do- and Jungkook seems to pick up on that. "You good?" He asks, and you nod.

"I.." You say, breathless as he tilts his head, smile still present on his lips. "What should I do?" You ask, as his eyes widen.

"You?" He wonders, before he stops for a moment. "Don't tell me- this is your first time?" He asks, now genuinely worried he might've gone too fast.

"No.." You admit. "But uhm.. no one's ever, like.. you know, what you're doing.." You say, and that's when it clicks for him.

What kind of guys did you date before him that never gave you any attention like this? He's upset by it, but also weirdly cheered on by that simple fact; it gives him even more reason to make sure you'll get the most out of it. "Ah, I see.." He humms out, letting another finger stretch your entrance for him. "..well, I'm not like that." He explains, before he moves, face now close to your center- and you're unsure what he's going to do. "Trust me." He says, mumbles out, before his tongue places itself flat onto your clit, licking painfully slow as you move your hands over your mouth, trying to keep your noises in. "nuh-uh baby." He scolds, free hand pulling yours away. "Let me hear you." He demands, before he places his mouth back where it was.

Your mind is completely blank at this moment, the only thing you can really concentrate on being Jungkook, working you up so quickly you feel dizzy. It's new, and it's a little weird- but it's more than anything you've ever experienced before. And it brings you towards your end so suddenly you suddenly gasp out, back arching off the mattress as you grab at the sheets below, one hand grasping for Jungkooks, who lets you ride out your high to its fullest. "So pretty." He comments after wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, smiling at your blissed out state.

"Kook-" You say, moving as you sit up, less shy now that your brain is still clouded by pleasure.

"Ah- you don't have to." He tells you, but you shake your head, and he lets you. He slips out of his clothes, finally bare, and you would've taken time to look at all the different pieces of art decorating his body- if it wasn't for his cock, red and ready in front of you. Usually, you would've let your insecurities and doubts get the best of you. But this was Jungkook. And you wanted to really believe that nothing you would do could ever be judged by him. So there was no hesitation as your hands reached out for him, gently moving, before you took him in, your lips wrapping themselves around his tip, before you moved downwards, fitting as much as you comfortably could. Meanwhile, Jungkook himself was steadying himself with one hand on the mattress, while the other was buried into your hair, his own head thrown back as he closed his eyes.

Of course he had fantasized about this every now and then; but he had never thought you'd actually be comfortable doing it. And even if- nothing he could've imagined would've ever compared to the real deal happening. There was something absolutely mindblowing about the way that you handled him, your sweet and pretty presence looking so divine doing such a sinful act with him. He had to pull you off by your hair, gently, because any more, and he would've been a goner. "G-Good god baby." He chuckles, pushing you a bit so you were on your back again, reaching for his bedside table to search for a condom. "I swear to god if I- HAH!" He tells you in victory, hands making quick work of opening the foil package and wrapping the safety over his length. "I swear I would've run out butt naked to buy one if I wouldn't have found this." He says with a grin, making you laugh.

"That's weird." You comment, and he chuckles, entering you slowly as to not hurt you, his breathing labored as he still kept the lighthearted energy going.

"You think?" He asks, and you nod, giggling as your eyes close, the feeling of him filling you up too good to keep them open. "Hm no." He said breathlessly. "Would've probably put on some pants maybe." He says, before he starts thrusting. "Doesn't matter if it means I'd get to fuck you." He says, and you giggle again.

"Kook!" You scold him, and he still continues to thrust into you, exhaling forcefully as he kisses your neck.

"What?" He whines high pitched as if to imitate you.

"Be serious!" You tell him, but can't help your own smile either.

"Oh, why though?" He says. "We're making love, not war baby." He whispers into your ear, and you still laugh at it.

"I can't believe you!" You complain playfully, moaning out when he suddenly thrusts with more force, obscene noises now interrupting you two as he picks up his pace, clenching his jaw.

"And-" He starts. "I can't believe how fucking good you feel." He presses out, hand now reaching between the two of you as he brings you towards an earth-shattering orgasm, making you mewl as you can feel yourself bursting. "Good girl!" He praises, watching as you squirt all over him, his own orgasm hitting him soon after as he grunts out, finally slowing down until he stills completely, his mouth attached to your neck to place gentle kisses and teasing bites near your pulse point.

"I love you." He mumbles out, and your eyes sting.

Because yeah, you love him- you absolutely do, but hearing it from him, hearing it in such an honest and warm-hearted tone, having this final proof of his own feelings towards you, makes you emotional. "Baby, why're you crying?" He chuckles out of breath, wiping your tears as you smile, and finally look at him with glossy eyes.

"Cause I love you too." You say. "So much."

And he can't help but grin at you.

You really are the sweetest thing.

You watch as Hana walks out of Taehyungs studio, arm wrapped up in clear foil as she walks towards your counter, pulling out her purse. "Taehyung agreed on 345." She says, until Taehyung yells another number out of his studio, making her eyes roll. She wasn't supposed to come back- but Taehyung had agreed to finish her piece at least. "Alright, here you go." She says, watching as you counted the money. "Does Jungkook work today?" She asks, and you nod. "I'm just gonna go say hi then. You can finish the receipt yeah?" She says overly sweet, and you're about to tell her that Jungkook doesn't want anyone entering without his permission, but he's already walking out his studio, black sweater and silver necklaces on full display as he walks towards you. "Jungkookie!" Hana exclaims, but her face drops almost chomically as she watches Jungkook walk up behind you, placing a kiss on your bare shoulder as he looks over it onto your screen.

"Oh, looks like I'm done for the day. You need anything Hana?" He asks innocently, one hand on your desk while the other rests on your chair behind your back.

"I- just wanted to apologize for uhm.. the emails. I didn't know you'd read them." She says, and you slowly close all programs, while Jungkooks humms out something.

"Yeah, I figured." He says, before he shakes his head. "As I said, I'm letting it go. No hard feelings." He says, shrugging, before he walks towards his studio again, stopping in his tracks for a second. "Ah, baby, can you text Jin-Hyung and ask him if we can come now? I'm actually starving I swear." He says, and you nod with red cheeks, pulling out your phone.

"Huh." Comes from Hana, as she takes the receipt from you. "I honestly.. would've never thought." She mumbles, before she simply leaves, without any more words.

Yeah. You would've honestly never thought either.

(c)Bonny-Kookoo. Please consider supporting me on Ko-Fi.com/bonnykookoo. Thank you for reading.

[iamsuchi]

Idk why i'm telling you this but it's about @girlpl6net .So she ALWAYSSS acts like her bf is in bts...like when you tell her is your bf in idk txt or straykidz she straight up said no but never gave a valid answere about bts ...She answered a question in which she said she just had dinner with his bf in south korea ...I got in her inbox and said SOOO bts are not in korea...then...your bf is not in bts ....AND SHE DELETED THE POST WERE SHE SAID SHE HAD RAMEN WITH HER BF IN SOUTH KOREA AND DIDNT ASNWERE MY QUESTION ...I SWEAR SHE'S LYING ABOUT HER KOREAN IDOL BF AND NOW I'M QUESTIONING THE WHOLE LOA 😭😭

Ok wow. ⚠️THIS IS GOING TO BE A LONG RESPONSE⚠️

⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️ PLEASE READ ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

First things first: YES I WELCOME ALL AND ANY QUESTIONS, COMMENTS AND/OR CORNERS. BUT PLEASE I ASK YOU GUYS NOT TO MENTION OR BRING UP ANY OTHER LOA BLOGGERS AND THEIR LIVES, ETC. THIS IS NOT A DRAMA BLOG NOR DO I HAVE TIME TO DISCUSS THE BUSINESS OF OTHERS HERE. I DON’T PART TAKE IN GOSSIP‼️‼️‼️ THIS BLOG IS SOLEY FOR THE PURPOSES OF HELPING MYSELF AS WELL AS OTHERS WITH MANIFESTING JOURNEYS. I DO NOT FOLLOW THE ABOVE BLOG MENTION SO I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE SECNARIO IS ABOUT. SO I WILL NOT BE COMMENTING ON THAT. I WILL NOT BE GETTING INVOLVED WITH DRAMA. I WILL NOT BE SPEAKING ABOUT THE MANIFESTING JOURNEYS OF OTHERS. AS I AM NOT THEM I CAN ONLY GIVE POINTS OF VIEW FROM MY OWN PERSPECTIVE. ‼️‼️ ⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️

With that being said I’ll only be addressing this anon’s issue about questioning whether the law is real or not. As always I will tell you DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH - DO NOT JUST COME ON TUMBLR AND HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE LOA IS AND TAKE THE WORD OF OTHER PEOPLE AS FACTS. GO TO THE MAN HIMSELF - NEVILLE GODDARD. You can find his lectures on YouTube (if requested I will make a post with the ones I’ve watched so far so others can hear it straight from the horses mouth), you can google him, you can get his books, you can look up quotes. They’re no excuses as to why you can’t go and see what he says for yourselves. Personally I found out about Neville 2 years ago and just like many people I had no idea what he was talking about my first thought was oh this is just some other religious nut case (because the lectures I watched he had a lot of references to the Bible and I’m not a religious person) but then when I decided to actually listen and pay attention to what he is saying things started to make sense for me. I’ve applied the law and it has personally worked for me, and as God of my reality I can only do what works for me. Using the law I was able to manifest getting a tattoo, I’ve manifested money, my kyphosis (look up if you don’t know what this is but it’s basically hunch back - has drastically improved), I’ve lost weight without exercising because I’m a lazy bitch🤣. So I know for me the LAW WORKS. I can only tell you based on my own personal experience it works. In the lecturers I’ve listened to Neville will tell you “test it”, “go on try it for yourself” you literally have nothing to loose but everything to gain so just try it. The Law of Assumption is basically believing that you have whatever it is that you deserve now even though your senses deny it. All it requires you to do (in my opinion - DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH) is just believe and have faith that whatever it is that you want is here it will show up. I know that for a fact because I have a whole tattoo on my wrist it showed up lol. I made a post about it but I’ll attach a picture so you can see I have my PROOF THAT IT WORKS - it’s not bullshit it works.

IT ALL COMES DOWN TO YOUR BELIEFS - IF YOU THINK THE LOA DOESN’T WORK OR IT JUST A HOAX OR WHATEVER IT WONT WORK. (See my pinned post about beliefs, faith and methods). This will happen because you’ve conditioned your mind to think it won’t work and your mind it that powerful and has no choice but to operate from the thoughts you’ve feed it (again my opinion right here). CHANGE THAT MINDSET- WORK ON YOUR SELF CONCEPT. And if you’re manifesting something and it hasn’t shown up in the 3D yet (KEY WORD HERE BEING YET) it doesn’t mean that you’re not going to get it!

➡️ See my post here for more info on that. For a quick note just look at this quote here:

“Oɴᴄᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴘʟᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛʜɪs sᴇᴇᴅ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ, ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴜᴘʀᴏᴏᴛ ɪᴛ ʙʏ ʙᴇɪɴɢ ᴀɴxɪᴏᴜs ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ɪᴛ ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴀᴄᴄᴏᴍᴘʟɪsʜᴇᴅ. Eᴀᴄʜ sᴇᴇᴅ ʜᴀs ɪᴛs ᴏᴡɴ ᴀᴘᴘᴏɪɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛɪᴍᴇ. Sᴏᴍᴇ sᴇᴇᴅs ᴛᴀᴋᴇ ᴀ ғᴇᴡ ᴅᴀʏs; ᴏᴛʜᴇʀs ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ʟᴏɴɢᴇʀ. Fᴇᴇʟ ᴄᴏɴғɪᴅᴇɴᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴘʟᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴀᴘᴘᴇᴀʀ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ.” – Nᴇᴠɪʟʟᴇ Gᴏᴅᴅᴀʀᴅ

This is one of my favorite quotes by Neville as it gives me so much hope and confidence within myself that it will come! I normally like to keep what I’m manifesting privately but I’m order to show you have strong my beliefs and faith is in myself as God and the loa, I’ll tell you this. I am currently in the process of manifesting moving to another country, I’m yet to see this materialize in the 3D as yet but thanks to this quote (every now and again I’ll turn to it when I’m feeling down or unmotivated for a little hope) as well as everyday I’d say to myself out loud or in my mind “I am now living in my desired country legally right now” and then I go on with my day because I have faith in myself as god I know that the 3D has to conform - every seed has its appointed time! I say that affirmation especially when I’m not in the feeling of the wishful filled because I refuse to give up. I’ve manifested before and I know I can do it again. They are no big or small desires all desires are equal so I know it’s only a matter of time before my desire is materialized into the 3D.

Final point: I can say all this and more, you can read success stories, you can even hear it From Neville himself but if you personally don’t believe it, it won’t work. As for success stories it’s up to you whether you want to believe it or not. I would say to use success stories as inspiration that the law works. Nothing is impossible. When you start to question and doubt in my opinion it’s like your questioning and doubting yourself and your abilities. Believe in yourself, that whatever it is that you want you can and already have it. As God you are limitless nothing stops you from getting what it is you want unless you decide that you’re going to allow something to stop you from.

DO NOT LET ANOTHER PERSON INFULENCE YOUR BELIEFS LIKE THAT AND CAUSE YOU TO DOUBT THE LOA AND ESPECIALLY YOURSELF LIFE THAT! BECAUSE YOU’RE ALLOWING SOMEONE ELSE’S STORY/PERSONAL EXPERIENCE/ETC TO GET YOU WORKED UP YOU ARE GIVING AWAY YOUR POWER TO EXTERNAL AN SOURCE OUTSIDE OF YOURSELF! THERE IS NO OTHER GOD BUT YOU WHEN IT COMES TO YOUR REALITY, SO YOU SHOULD NOT LET SOMEONE INFLUENCE YOU LIKE THAT AND THIS IS WHY DOING YOUR OWN RESEARCH IS IMPORTANT‼️ DO NOT COME ON TUMBLR AND/OR OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA AND LET NO ONE DICTATE ANYTHING TO YOU‼️‼️