#I'm gonna dive right in | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

john-gosh-darnielle · 6 months

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I will go down punching,

but I will go down

#I'm gonna dive right in #i can't swim #bleed out #eponymous #the mountain goats #tmg posting #mountain goats posting #tmg lyrics #tmg fan art #doodles #the mountain goats fan art #artists on tumblr #SoundCloud

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detectiveneve · 11 months

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the fact of wyll being generally accepting and good toward those who are in the midst of making mistakes, are about to do a folly of some kind, or are perceived as lesser than or in some manner "evil" in society, made me think of how, to an extent I wish we could pry more at his perceptions of monsters as a monster hunter and deep dive into that in conversation but more than that I Do Think about how he reached this point of near unflappable patience and understanding after being raised a noble's son. an honorable noble's son, yes, but a noble still (with his little stories of his Youth he gives a few times.) he doesn't deny that's how he was raised but the expectation of a noble upbringing is so far removed from how he acts today, with you. his patience + sincerity + openness. and thinking of that in the context of how he is proud of the moment he swore his pact, the moment he was shunned, but no one else was proud of him in that moment, no one else even knew. how much that singular moment of such deep misunderstanding and harshness toward him must have embedded in him a very deep capacity for empathy for failure and mishap. no one ELSE was there for him so he can continue to be the Single Person there for you when you're faltering, quite badly, maybe even embarrassingly. no one was there to help or guide him with his pact with mizora either. he had no choice but impulse and hope that he was doing the right thing. as A SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD. so he can be that guy for everyone else in the meanwhile.

#augh... auuuuuugh Wyllyam..........#I still need to deep dive into his romance scenes so his character is a bit more distant to me but he can be such a guy. SUCH a guy.#I'm gonna give you the most insufferable little bard Wyll. don't thank me #and when I say I wish we could deep dive I only mean I'd love to pick a little bit at what his standards are for monstrosity #how he decided who to fight for and against. were there ever moments of hesitation. does HE wonder #if he fought the right people in the past after his thing with karlach.#let me inside your MIND sir #bg3 meta

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orionsangel86 · 5 months

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#I know this is gonna come across as a bit pathetic #but I was already feeling a bit untethered today #wondering if I actually have a purpose here #ever since I came back to tumblr after my 4 month break I've felt very alone here #it feels a bit like everyone moved on without me #and I dunno i guess I hoped I'd be able to dive right back in again and just start engaging and enjoying it #but honestly I have been plagued with anxiety and intrusive thoughts about not being wanted #and the last thing I needed was some asshole anon #I'm already wondering if people are finding my event annoying #like maybe i should just shut up and quit #but I really fucking like doing this stuff I just wish I didn't feel so isolated #I'm being stupid i know #you should never trust how you feel about yourself after 9pm #but bleurgh its a horrible feeling #shut up saz

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savage-rhi · 2 months

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Fuschia/Magenta?

#*deep breath kicks down uni door*#VERN!!! VERNIFRED!!! I GOT A HUGE BONE TO PICK WITH YOU!!!!! YES YOU!!!!#“we're only gonna read 1 chap of Don Quixote because it's too much to dive into.”#THIS COMING FROM THE MAN WHO MADE US READ THE ENTIRETY OF DANTES INFERNO #WHO MADE US WRITE 20 PAGE ESSAYS ON THE ODYSSEY #WHO MADE US FOLLOW HIS CANTERBURY TALES HYPERFIXATION FOR NOT 1 BUT 2 SEMESTERS #DISSECTING EVERY. FUCKING. CHARACTER. ACTION.#MAKING ME RESENT CHAUCER TO WHERE I COULDN'T WATCH A KNIGHTS TALE FOR 3 YEARS STRAIGHT #one of my all time favorite movies btw YOU MADE ME HATE THE THING I LOVED VERNIFRED #and you had the GALL to say the class only had 1 chap to dedicate to Don Quixote?#YOU MY FRIEND JUST DIDN'T WANT THE CLASS TO LOSE THEIR SHIT LAUGHING EVERY OTHER CHAPTER #IF YOU'RE AROUND HUMAN HAPPINESS YOU'RE LIKE A WORM DISCOVERING THE BAIT SECTION AT WALMART #ITS EASY TO READ FOR A CLASSIC HAS WIT IS BITTER SWEET AF IS TRAGIC IS FUN AND MAKES YOU WANT TO HAVE CRAZY MAN BIG DICK ENERGY #WHEN YOU HAVE A FOOT IN THE GRAVE #and the banter...THAT SHIT ROCKS #AND IM NOT JUST SAYING THIS CAUSE OF MY OWN HYPERFIX WITH LUIS AND I'M READING FOR RESEARCH #these stories FUCK #I AM SO MAD #SO SO MAD MY PEERS AND I GOT A TASTE OF SOMETHING THAT WOULD'VE KEPT US ENGAGED #AND I AM MAD THAT I RESENTED THAT CLASS SO MUCH THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO TOUCH THE CLASSICS FOR A WHILE #and that it took me until I'm 31 WRITING A DAMN FANFIC IN MY SPARE TIME TO READ THE ENTIRETY OF WHAT I FUCKING MISSED OUT ON #astarion voice: IT WAS RIGHT THERE!!!!!#vernifred...can i can i call you vern?#look...i love you. you were one of the most humble profs i had i looked forward to going to class every mon and tues for lecture and reading #i get the hyperfixations my guy i really and truly do #BUT I STILL RESENT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU FOR THIS ONE #i finally get why luis loved this shit so much too and im seeing more connections with re4 now and it feels like the cherry on top of it all #vern....just....SIGH....GIVE THE DON A CHANCE MAN #FOR THE SAKE OF THE CHILDREN WHO WILL BE IN YOUR CARE #YOU KNOW...YOU JUST...MAKE ME...GRRRHFHFHHDJDJ!!! 🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼

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dazzle02 · 3 months

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TW: Self Harm and Suicide

Imagine the 118 getting a call to a house for a suicide attempt. It's a teenager, maybe 13. She's hurt herself badly, maybe she hadn't meant for it to be as bad as it was. But her parents are not happy. And not in the sense that they're worried because their daughter just potentially tried to kill herself, but they're actually upset with her.

And they start saying about how she's been hurting herself lately, but it's just for attention. (You know, that horrible thing some people say about SH...) That she's not actually got any problems, she just wants attention.

And they're all pretty pissed at the parents, but they're trying to be professional, because they have to be.

But Buck just snaps. He was a kid who was hurting himself to get his parents attention. And it was awful for him. It severely damaged his psyche. To this day he still struggles to deal with people not giving him the right attention. So he knows how this kid must feel.

And so maybe he snaps at the parents, or maybe he just totally shuts down.

Either way, the rest of the 118 pick up on it. And it suddenly hits them what he was telling them all those years ago when he was telling them about his parents. It really hits them all that he was purposely hurting himself as a kid.

#911 on abc #evan buckley #118 firefam #this may or may not have come from me thinking about their response to buck telling them about that #it just didn't really seem like they totally got it #that he was literally telling them that he has a history of self harm #starting from like the age of five #it also comes from really wanting to dive into his psyche #he has some issues #maybe he adopts this child because her parents aren't fit parents #and she becomes kinda attached to him because he checks in on her at the hospital #her parents didn't come to the hospital #so they lose their parental rights #i'm literally trying to give this kid a happy ending here #she doesn't even have a name #but i care about her so much!#so yeah #buck adopts her and they both live happily ever after #also gonna tag this #bucktommy #he's adopting the girl with him #they're all just happy #someone write this if you want #fic idea #no pressure

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shirogane-oushirou · 5 months

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[little vent -- tldr definitely not gonna have the planned art ready for the renniversary lol.]

me: "oh hell yeah i'll have a dog-sitting "job" for the next few days, so i'll have plenty of time to work on the art leading up to friday :) "

the dogs: untrained, poorly behaved, require constant attention (not their fault but it's the reality of the situation)

so uh. i might have some simple chibi art for friday if i have enough energy between putting the dogs to bed and going to sleep hghghghgh ;;;;; i'll finish the more detailed pics as i have the time and energy :')

#(edit: just to be clear -- the 'job' is in quotes only bc in my case i'm not being paid as much as a proper job LOL LMAO. :') )#the last post abt this was more 'i'm giving myself an out if i can't do it'. now it's 'i can't do it' ksjdnksjn #i'm still gonna try to do some other things that don't require as much undivided attention as art does though...?#blah blah blah ren wouldn't want me to stress etc etc etc. still disappointing.#he came to me RIGHT when i needed him... but also... why did it have to be 6 days after my other closest main's anniv JKASN #i'm debating making the wedding the same day as the r!ren anniversary just so it's one less date to worry about LMAO ;;;;;#anyway. just venting about the fact that so much is happening Right Now and not Literally Any Other Time.#at least i'll have a little extra pocket money for a comm or two once i finish redoing his ref sheet...!!#and the reality is... i've made SO MUCH art of him over the past year. i won't be struggling to find posts to rb on the day ksjdn #i should probably get started gathering that art for the yumeship sheet though jsdnk time to dive through my tags.#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]#vent -

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raayllum · 2 years

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Can you fix my flaws? Are you a bad excuse for therapy? How am I supposed to live One foot out and one foot in? I fear the fall Right now I just can't find thе energy Weighеd down by a ton of bricks I'm forgetting how to swim

#rayllum #rayllumedit #s4 #arc 2 #noah kahan #my edits #graphics #multi #water motif #fun fact: this is my favourite noah kahan song and one of my favourite songs Ever #the ending makes me cry every time #now i'm not afraid of the water / i'll dive right in #and i can be brave so i'm gonna give it a try / cause you'll be on the other side #and it's been The Kanej song for me for a few years now but also very very happy #to give it (and my tears over it) to rayllum as well #tag ramble #forbidden op lore #music #personal fave

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baphofemme · 1 month

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nah...

#my mom is acting a mess right now 😭#she was in the loft watching skynews and left the tv on #this was before she went inside one of the rooms to have another debate with strangers on tiktok live #i wish i was making this shit up #not to mention her being casually homophobic & transphobic to one of the ppl in the live despite the subject being entirely different #and she kept asking 'how old are you?' repeatedly to one of the ppl in the live #i predict she's gonna dive headfirst into qanon by the end of the year #i'm not in any immediate danger for anyone who's worried but i just find this situation ridiculous #what's cookin' in hell's kitchen?

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angered-box · 3 months

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back to beddddd

#my mental state is taking a nose dive right now i do not think i'm gonna be able to draw and be happy with anything today #which sucks! i really should have called to get a refill before i was on one last pill but i will never learn :/

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thedreadvampy · 1 year

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idk I had a very interesting therap today but I just

like it's all very well to recognise that I gotta have a fucking open-ended breakdown and jump face first into the Sadness Bog sometimes instead of sitting on all my feelings

but like

I still have to go to work, you know? it's like. ok yeah have a breakdown which like until you jump into it you don't know if it's going to last an hour or a year. yeah go ahead that's all grand. you do have to get up in the morning and go to work though. you're not allowed to not do that. or to not pay the rent or not shower or not eat.

like all my friends and loved ones are constantly like 'you know you're allowed to be sad right' and it's like. AM I??? because I STILL HAVE TO PAY RENT.

#red said #the thing my therapist keeps pointing out is like. i got on this adulthood thing WAY too early #metaphorically i have Had To Go To Work In The Morning since i was like. 4. bc i am congenitally incapable of #Not Thinking About Consequences. and it's so important to be Good and Tough and Have It Together #but like. maybe if id done more crying and melting down when i DIDN'T Have To Go To Work In The Morning bc i was a Literal Infant #i might be a more balanced adult now that i actually DO. Have To Go To Work In The Morning.#what do people like. do. when they have to have feelings but also meet adult responsibilities? impossible. gotta choose.#i think it doesn't help that i already really struggle to work a full time job. like I'm already late basically every day bc i a night guy #so it's like. there's no give in this. maybe if i was back into a 3-4 day week? but idk if i can afford that #but also the work is only partly work. it's also like. having human relationships. eating. washing. being a person.#but idk. like. until i have some genuinely open-ended time i think I'm gonna always find it impossible to actually let go #i said in therapy it's like. like sadness specifically is like a thick muddy bog. and i can dip a foot in it #but bc i know i need to be able to keep moving #i can only stick a foot in and deal with a bit of it if I'm holding onto something. so in practise i can only cry #right before it becomes inappropriate to cry. so like. end of a therapy session. heading to a train station after seeing someone.#that kind of thing. it's a safety thing.#it would be much more effectively Dealing With to go dive into the bog and plough through it #but I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG THAT'LL TAKE and i have to like. come out all muddy and deal with that #and there's always somewhere i gotta be soon. i can't just jump into the mud. not cause I'll get hurt i just Don't Have Time #anyway. feelings. how do they work. embarrassed about having them. embarrassed about suppressing them. generally just embarrassed.

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pleasetakethis · 11 months

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oh oh oh The gay pirate show season 2 finale Got Me.

#no spoilers #just #aslkfjldaisjfaslkjfd #if you know...#you know #ofmd #ofmd s2 #i'm gonna sit with my feels for a long time #thank you david jenkins + crew #eventually spoilery reblogs will end up in my queue but not today #i don't have the emotional capacity to rewatch or dive into the tag right now #all the feels #every single one

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raeloganthesonic06fangirl · 7 months

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Went to Target during a trip to the next state over with Mom so we could have a fun day out, and I found DC Comics Manga, and this Joker one is so tempting to grab an ebook of

This sounds like a typical fanfiction plot idea and I'm all for it

Also, found some cute Lego polybags, which is a nice bit to add to my Lego collection I'm rebuilding, as I'm mostly grabbing small bags and bricks from thrifting

A cute farmer with a scarecrow and a bunny, and a "birthday train" micro build.

Also, I decided to finally try a minifigure blind box, since my Lego are gonna need some people for them, and golly, they've changed since I was a kid

I got an Olympic runner guy with running blades prosthetics and a Harpy with articulated wings! I found out that they're making minifigs now that includes some wild fantasy elements and disability representation. I really want to find the dog groomer one with the Afghan hound and has a cochlear implant, the dog is cute and since hard-of-hearing runs in my family, that has a bit of a personal sentimental concept there...

Anyway, my Valentine's day was pretty cool. Nothing but good luck, people were very polite and friendly, and absolutely nothing went wrong this year. 🥹

#We also went to a Mongolian buffet and it was great #And I found an epic Lego Dots set marked down to an irresistible and reasonable price #They have these wonderful color tiles that are like a neon 90s aesthetic and the tiles will smooth out the builds nicely #I got some second hand bricks and tiles and have been testing out ideas that includes tactical fidgeting functions #I haven't built with Legos since 2011 so this will be a great time #I used to have a massive box of pieces my brothers gave me over the years but they had to be donated because they couldn't fit in the van #I'm gonna just keep everything in a bucket now #To save space #But I mostly want bricks and tiles and snot bricks and technics #Snot bricks just means studs not on top like an acronym #It's the funny bricks with connections on the sides #I've been watching so many cool lego deep dive videos and the new techniques and possibilities I've seen makes me want to try new ideas #I've always been a builder at heart I just love making stuff and I miss my old lego because I used to build visuals for my art as a kid #Lego ain't just for kids anymore and I love it #I'm obsessed with the Dots right now too #So cute

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spaceratprodigy · 8 months

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right now tho I'm really fixated on rogue trader lmao I want to work on Ceciliana ✌😔