Sorry, I just need to get this off my chest.
You know what's shit?
That I always come back to work on my explanation posts on why Alya, Plagg, and Emonette being treated unfairly and being disregarded by Maribug's writing is by now pissing me off to similar degrees as her bad treatment of Chat Noir
But that always ends in a domino effect of me putting together more of the overall narrative that ticks me off so much cause my ADD brain can't NOT look for the continuous string of the writing pattern I follow once I'm at it.
You probably can imagine that this isn't very good for my mental health and the only reason why I'm still doing it is because I have a strong suspicion on what the new story arc will do with Cerise after this agonizing hiatus, and only once the actual new story arc proves me wrong can my ADD brain let this emotional investment of 7+ years in my "comfort show" since I was a 16 rest in peace.
Being neurodivergent is exhausting of FUCK...
So I always stop writing any of the posts about the other topics and come back to my Adrichat corner because that's the "safe space" my brain is the most familiar and comfortable with by now since season 4 to make a post AT ALL that isn't running the risk of leading me down 7 new rabbit holes I can't unsee anymore afterwards...
I MISS looking into several narrative threads in this show and voicing my opinions on them. In hindsight, I regret not having done it more when it was still possible, but I feel like it should have been alright in any other normally written show to have a fan blog dedicated to a specific part of the story. I feel like I shouldn't be the one in the WRONG for having done that.
Anyway, I honestly MISS the time where I knew that Maribug's benefit and comfort weren't the only things accepted as "valid" readings of the story. From both sides. Supporters and critics/salters.
Where saying anything that isn't immediately connected to Marinette's benefit and comfort didn't need a full-blown 20 page essay post going into any detail possible to fight for the right to even be taken seriously as a realistic reading of the story at all.
I know I'm not the only one upset at this, but I wonder how many people really realized by now how batshit insane this is right now. That only the most vanilla and vague-ass posts that do their best to not in anyway say something that would be "mean" and "non-validating" to Marinette can be posted now without it automatically being categorized as at least "critical" or running the risk of getting perceived as salt or wishful-thinking.
You can't point ANYTHING out anymore without at least one person running in and either saying "You just HATE Marinette and want to see her punished! You people never care about HERRRRRRRRRR (regarding a topic that isn't about her or is her fucking JOB as a narrative tool to DO)" or "Yeah, nah, the show would never let that happen because of the Marinette bias lol"
You can't even say anything anymore about Adrien's abuse without it being either undermined to all hell because of Marinette having been bullied and needing to be a girlboss who does to others what she's declared "tortured" for, or Félix "hypocrite and victim-blamer" Fathom. Gabriel being abusive was once the most basic ass thing to talk about, what the fuck happened?? (don't answer that, I know the answer...)
The whole analysis' side of this fandom that isn't catering to Marinette was either killed or basically exiled into the "critical" or outright "salt" tag because you can't even be interested in world-building anymore without having to fight for the post's right to be taken seriously under the crushing weight of Marinette's narrative benefits and comfort.
Because mademoiselle ain't fucking interested in ANYTHING lore wise beyond what's convenient for her (not to mention the retcons), so talking about the Guardian and Kwami lore for example counts as SALT now because it automatically implies for people that Marinette isn't all that matters and her flaws of not being interest in ANYTHING might actually COUNT as flaws she should work on. I know, the fucking HORROR! 😱
I MISS writing theories, analysis posts, and speculating about this shows future plots in even the most basic "set up and pay off" manner but I know I can't because my default approach is always complementary to the main character - meaning what challenges them and the narrative the most to grow, expand, and develop. This isn't a Marinette specific thing, I ALWAYS do this.
And contrary to popular belief in this fandom, I get by perfectly fine doing that for the majority of other pieces of media I consume. It is MIRACULOUS and this damn Fandom that now genuinely did it's best to convince themselves that this level of main character centric morality and revenge porn level writing is NORMAL when it's seriously NOT.
There is a REASON why this show hardly ever gets recommended on social media the way one would think despite its success. Or why the Fan backlash is so enormous despite a solid part of the Fandom already having left long ago and the young target demographic not uniformly having a voice in the social media discourse.
Or why people actively advise others AGAINST watching the show, AGAINST forming an emotional investment, and AGAINST going anywhere near the Fandom.
Cause no fucking shit, this isn't normal.
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Was browsing through early BOBF/Mando S3 criticisms on Tumblr and WOW, 93% of S2’s viewership dropped when S3 finished airing for an extremely understandable reason. As someone who got into Dinluke after all the dust settled I can only imagine what it was like becoming invested in Din’s story and being floored by the S2 finale only for it to get totally swerve-balled after a long-anticipated wait. How did you avoid the disappointment and burnout?
Spite is an incredibly powerful motivator, let me tell you.
I'm halfway joking about that, btw. I could say I'm used to disappointment and I also worked really hard not to take things too personally after being disappointed time and again year after year by fandoms I was in. Imo the healthiest attitude is that no show/movie/book/videogames/etc will ever play out the way you want/think it should so take what you can get and trash the rest. By the time I started watching The Mandalorian, I'd been burnt badly by Star Trek AOS, the Sequel Trilogy, the MCU, and the Disney machine, and I had to figure out how to accept that I like what I like, I can't change what I can't change, and I can/will run the fuck off with what I can change, which is making wildly fun and fulfilling transformative shit like fanfics and fanart.
I was actually excited about TBOBF and was utterly betrayed by the executive decision to throw him and Fennec to the side in order to absolutely trash the Season 2 finale of the Mando Show by having Din and Grogu reunite just like that. I guess I got lucky in that I had a long-running fic series that I was heavily invested in and I was not about to let Disney stop me from finishing it. Instead of letting my frustrations kill my interest in the show and fandom, I turned it into motivation to keep telling the story I wanted to tell based on the fallout of Season 2. It also helped that Andor happened.
I quit Season 3 of the Mando Show after the 1st episode and it was the best decision I ever made. I had a really rough time with it and was encouraged to step away if it was giving me too much stress. I'm glad for that. Less time and energy picking about Filoni&Favreau and Disney Lucasfilm's decisions and disappointments, more time and energy spent writing and drawing the dinluke I want to see. The nice thing about Star Wars is that it is an old and vast sandbox. Plenty of room here to build whatever sandcastles and dig however many holes you want while canon goes floundering by.
I think also that it really helped to find spaces to share with people who vibe on the same wavelength, so I'm not alone to my thoughts and spiraling myself out of a fandom I enjoyed (like what happened with TLJ but I shan't go there bc this response is long enough). Those posts about having friends you can shit-talk things with? Valid af. You need outlets to vent your grievances without setting bridges on fire, and it'll help your enjoyment of things in the long run.
I didn't avoid the disappointment but I figured out how to make something of it, so I'm still writing dinluke, I'm still drawing dinluke, I'm still getting giddy over dinluke. I actively choose to do what I want with them, and nothing Disney Lucasfilm puts out is ever going to stop me.
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An outfit/height ref thing I did for fun, for a post canon OC riddled thing I've dubbed "Echoes of Chalcedony" that lives eternally rent free in my head and probably will stay there forever, barring the occasional art or lore post I make about it
Featuring:
Adult Steven and Connie- Steeb's like 20 and some change, and Connie is 19. Steven's now living somewhere out on the west coast of the country and Connie is neck deep in college. They still visit Beach City and are involved in Gem related matters/politics sometimes (the formal outfits are for an Era 3 anniversary ball, which Steven begrudgingly attends), but they have their own lives to live too.
A Gem-human hybrid OC I have named Jean Maverick. They're 18- and lived a very sheltered human life for all that time before seeking out the Gems at Little Homeworld... craving more understanding about the Gem half of their ancestry. The Crystal Gems are very baffled at the notion that another Gem-human hybrid existed on Earth this whole time, and they never knew about it.
(Visualized in the second image) One of the unique Gem abilities Jean harnesses over time is dubbed 'palette swapping'- in which they can consciously shift the hue of their features into a more Gem-like appearance, according to their gemstone type. This is likely caused by projected hard light from their gem snugly wrapping around their form like a glove. There is no practical benefit to this ability (in fact, it actually drains Jean's energy pretty fast), and it's theorized that it was born out of Jean's deep alienation from their human ancestry and their intense desire to shed this and simply be a Gem.
Past and current forms for my Gem OCs Tourmaline and Morganite! In the past, these two were highly respected on Homeworld and a romantic item. Tourmaline was an aristocratic Gem in Blue's court in charge of managing whole cuts of Gems for special functions and balls, and Morganite was a young general bequeathed to Pink Diamond at the start of her Earth colony. Thousands of years later, the two found themselves fighting on opposite sides of the same conflict... with Tourmaline defecting and becoming a Crystal Gem, and Morganite remaining loyal to her Homeworld to the very bitter end. There's... some feelings of intense betrayal here.
In the present day, Morganite ends up as an antagonist in Jean's story, unhappy with the status quo of this new era and prepared to tear it all down to the ground- although the particulars of her actions suggest she has some... alternative motives here, too. What could they be?
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Followup to the headcanon-intensive drama from this post:
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"Sister," Rakha mutters, crouching next to Z'rell's fallen body. Her head lifts; her eyes bore into Wyll, watching her. "What did she mean, sister?"
Wyll shifts uncomfortably. "I don't know," he mutters. There's a long, strained silence. Then he adds awkwardly, "I wasn't-- I mean, I thought I must be... wrong..."
She looks down at the dead woman again. "You knew this. And you didn't tell me."
"I knew you looked similar," he says, somewhat defensively. "That's all. What good to tell you a guess with no weight, and hurt you for no cause?"
She flicks her glare towards Lae'zel. "And you? You knew this?"
"I noticed nothing," Lae'zel growls. "She was an enemy. Why should I see anything of you in her?"
Rakhya ignores this sentiment just as she ignored Wyll's. "And you?" This to Minthara now, who is standing some distance from the others, watching silently.
For a long time, Minthara doesn't answer, just looks back at her steadily. Then she grunts with a slight shrug. "That you are related? Obvious in retrospect, though I did not look for it. But did I know it? No. She never spoke of a sister." She takes a step forward, kicking aside the body of one of the cultists that stands in her way. "Z'rell and I spoke only a handful of times. She considered herself superior to all she spoke to, save Ketheric himself. I am sure she would have thought it far beneath her notice to be bound by blood to anyone."
Another long silence. Then she steps forward again, to Rakha's side, and rests a hand on her shoulder. "I see it troubles you. But you are not the first to kill kin, if kin she is," she says gravely.
Is that what I am? Troubled? Rakha looks down again at the dead woman with the face so like her own, and tries to parse some comprehensible thought out of the mess of emotions swirling in her head. "I do not remember her," she mutters. "I do not think she remembered me, until just at the last. But she knew me. Had I let her live... perhaps she might have finally given me answers."
"Had she lived," Minthara says bluntly, "it would be her knife in your throat instead. Do not fool yourself with impossibilities." She looks down at Rakha keenly. "You are stronger than that."
Rakha shrugs. She feels empty, drained to the dregs, a shell for the beast to live in. "Who am I?" she asks the unmoving corpse before her in a low mutter. Then, louder, "Who am I?"
A sudden shout, bursting from her like an explosion. "WHO AM I, DAMN YOU!? WHO AM I?!"
The corpse does not answer.
She remembers the spell He Who Was cast out in the darkness, the spell that dragged the soul back into the body to answer questions.(*) She starts to her feet abruptly, her hands lifting, dragging at the Weave, forcing it into the shape she remembers.
Her eyes glow pale green and the energy surges out of her into Z'rell's body. The corpse lurches into the air, its back arching as if suspended at the waist by a rope. Its eyes open, blank and staring in its slack face.
"Who am I?" Rakha demands.
"Interloper. Returned exile..." rasps Z'rell's corpse.
Not good enough. "Who am I?" Rakha demands again.
"Tables turned..." whispers Z'rell. "Under my boot at last..."
"Who am I?" Rakha growls between her teeth.
"The chosen... the worthy..." The corpse's death-whine is mocking. "Always the first in line..."
Rakha's breath is quickening with agitation and rage. "Who am I?!" she demands, and it's half a shout now.
"My sister!" wails Z'rell; her head spasms to one side. "Twin but not equal--"
"WHO AM I?!" Rakha bellows, and the green fire in her eyes glows brighter still.
"Child of... murder..." wheezes the corpse.
The light fades. The body sags down out of the magical grip and hits the floor with a heavy thump.
Silence. Rakha stares down at the dead woman's body, her shoulders heaving, her fists clenched white-knuckled at her sides. No one moves - not Rakha, not her companions, not the two or three frightened-looking Harpers who have been watching this scene unfold.
"RrrrrraaaaaaRRRGHHHHHH!" Rakha lashes out abruptly with a kick at Z'rell's head. The corpse's head snaps to the side with a visceral crack. "Damn you. Damn you. Damn you!"
She hisses out a heavy breath through a clenched jaw and turns away. "We press on."
"Rakha..." Wyll takes a cautious step towards her, reaching out a hand towards her arm, but she jerks away.
"We press on," she repeats sharply. "Ketheric must die too before I'm satisfied."
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(*) Rakha actually has Speak With Dead as a slotless ritual spell as a result of having turned some pages in the Necromancy of Thay, months ago. But the business with He Who Was is much fresher in her mind. Tragically, Z'rell is not actually available for Speak With Dead in-game for me to get screenshots of her corpse in it; I tried, all the way to the point of sending Rakha back to camp for a respec so she could disguise herself while doing it. But it's my story and I do what I want.
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