#I'm sorry I didn't break out the text tool

[hackedmotionsensors]

>_> okay okay okay okay Im sorry okay?? I'M SORRY MY HANDWRITING IS SO FUCKING SHIT YOU CAN'T READ IT

I CAN'T READ IT EITHER LMAO

PLEASE I'M SORRY. I PROMISE I'M TRYING. I'M NOT TRYING TO BE A DICK PLEASE I'M SORRY.

[loveroftoomanyfandoms]

Sweet on You, Chapter 5

Pairing: Matt Murdock x F!Reader

Story Summary: HERE

Warnings/Tags: Sugar Daddy!Matt Murdock, Idiots to Lovers, No Age Gap, Alternating PoV, No Use of Y/N 

Word Count: ~2k

A/N: None for this chapter except enjoy!

(Divider by the superb @theradioactivespidergwen !)

Tag List: @danzer8705 @capylore @shouldbestudying41 @atemydadforbreakfast @peachy-flxwr @sleepysleepymom @fishinsuits @milkbummm @lazyxsquirrel @beezusvreeland @caughtthefever @bohemianrhapsody86 @yarrystyleeza @indestructeible @pepperthebi-spy @kezibear

How does Italian sound for tomorrow night? I was thinking Casa Italia over on 51st.

You couldn't help but smile as you noticed the text notification from Matt on your phone. 

He had apparently texted you several hours prior but you had been busy taking notes for Mr. DiStefano during a meeting with an important client most of the morning and had just gotten a second to breathe before having to go pick up lunch for the partners (because God forbid they be willing to pay a few extra bucks for delivery and tip instead of sending you to go fetch it). 

That sounds great, you replied. What time and where did you want to meet?

You put your phone back into your pants pocket and gathered your purse, then stopped by your boss's office. “Excuse me, Mr. DiStefano, I'm heading out to go pick up your lunch.”

Mr. DiStefano nodded. “As soon as you get back I need you to input the payments that came in this morning and bring the checks to the bank since you didn't do it earlier.”

Your eye twitched. The reason you hadn't done the deposit yet was because right after you had signed for the incoming checks and the courier had left you had been called into that 3-hour meeting. As it was, you'd barely had time to lock the envelopes in your top desk drawer and forward the main phone line to voicemail before Mr. DiStefano was exaggeratedly sighing while looking at his watch.

You plastered a fake smile on your face. On top of still needing to do the day's deposit you also had to transcribe the notes you had taken during the meeting while they were still semi-fresh in your mind, return phone calls, forward voicemails, schedule more meetings, and prepare and send the day’s invoices. “Of course, sir.”

You continued down the hall towards Mr. Williams’s office, passing the doorway without stopping when you heard him and Mr. Abbott laughing together in Mr. Abbott’s office.

“...So then she goes -- she goes, ‘oh, okay’ and drinks it anyway!” Mr. Abbott was saying. “Dumb as a box of rocks, but at least she had a nice rack.”

You rolled your eyes before stopping in front of his office. What a tool.  

You knocked on the doorframe. “Excuse me, Mr. Abbott?”

Mr. Abbott paused and looked past Mr. Williams to you. “Yes?”

You fought to keep your smile. “I'm sorry to interrupt, but I'm just letting you both know that I'm going to go pick up your lunches now.”

Mr. Williams, who had also turned towards you once he realized you were in the doorway, nodded. 

Mr. Abbott dug his wallet out of his pocket and handed you a laundry pickup ticket. “While you're out, pick up my dry cleaning for me. Thanks, dollface.”

What you wanted to say was ‘fuck you and your fucking dry cleaning’ but instead you forced yourself to remain calm. “Sure thing, Mr. Abbott. Mr. Williams, do you need anything else while I'm out?”

Mr. Williams glanced at Mr. Abbott briefly before looking back at you and shaking his head. “Not at the moment, no.”

You nodded. “Okay then, I'll be back soon.” 

Your smile dropped as soon as you turned away from the doorway. There goes any chance of me having a lunch break. At least by some miracle all three of the partners had ordered from the same restaurant today so you (probably) wouldn't be late getting back.

You took a deep breath. It'll be fine.You got this.

You made sure that the phone was still forwarding to voicemail then headed out.

You waited until you had gotten down the block a ways before you took your phone out of your pocket, pulled up your contacts, and pressed the dial button.

You put your phone up to your ear as it began to ring.

“Sky’s the Limit Tech Consulting, this is Roxanne,” said the voice on the other end.

You smiled at the sound of Roxy’s voice. She was the little sister you had never had -- despite your 11-year age difference the two of you had grown close over the three and a half years she had worked at DiStefano and Associates. “Hi, Rox.”

Roxy said your name. “Oh my gosh, hi!”

“Is this a bad time?”

“For you? Never. Just give me a second.”

You heard Roxy set the phone down and close her office door. 

She picked the receiver back up. “Okay, I'm back. What's up?”

“I just needed someone to vent to for a minute.”

“Still haven't replaced me and Tab yet, huh?”

You sighed deeply. “No, and it'd be one thing if they'd at least mention advertising your positions, but I haven't even heard a peep. I'm honestly starting to feel like they aren't even going to bother replacing you, because why go through the trouble of replacing the two people they lost when they can save money by just running me ragged instead?”

“I'm so sorry, I feel terrible leaving you by yourself. Maybe I should have stayed there instead of accepting my position here.”

You shook your head. “Nope. Not hearing that. You worked your ass off in order to earn your master's degree so you could get your dream job in Silicon Valley. You didn't know Tabitha was going to get fired 2 days after you left New York or that DiStefano was going to decide that 1 assistant was enough for all 3 of them.”

“Still, I feel bad leaving you to have to deal with all 3 partners by yourself.”

You rolled your eyes. Despite the fact that she had been absolutely useless, it had almost been worth having Tabitha around just to distract Abbott from hitting on and making gross, sexist comments towards you. “Ugh, yeah. Abbott just ordered me to pick up his dry cleaning while I'm out getting the partners lunch today and called me ‘dollface’.” 

“Eww.”

“And DiStefano pulled me into a 3-hour meeting this morning in order to take notes then made a passive-aggressive comment about me not having done the daily bank deposit yet.” You sighed. “At least Williams hasn't sexually harassed or made me feel incompetent yet today, but since the day’s only half over there's still a chance!”

Roxy groaned. “Girl, fuck them. Why don't you just quit?”

You shook your head. “You know I can't, not if I want to eat and keep a roof over my head while trying to help my mom with her hospital bills.”

Roxy hummed. “Speaking of that, how's your other job going? Found you a hot, rich ‘companion’ yet?”

You grinned as you thought about Matt. “Actually, yeah, I have.”

Roxy gasped. “Hey, that's great! So what's his name?”

You bit your lip. Roxy was the only person who knew about your S&S profile -- after all, she was the one who had gotten you to join -- but your contract made it clear that you wouldn't reveal the nature of your relationship with Matt to anyone. “I can't tell you. He wants to be discreet so he had me sign a contract saying that I won't tell anyone about him and me.”

“Ooh, is he a celebrity?”

You huffed out a laugh. “No, he's an attorney.”

“Married?”

“Nope. Or at least, he told me he was totally single.”

“And you believe him?”

You thought about how honest and genuine Matt seemed to be so far. “Yeah. Yeah, I actually do. He doesn't seem to be trying to hide me in particular, just how we really met and what our arrangement consists of.” You paused. “Anyway, it's really new. We met up for coffee on Saturday and had dinner together Monday night. He took me to Okinawa.”

Roxy whistled. “Okinawa? Wow, he must be loaded. When are you seeing him again?”

“Tomorrow night after work, actually. We're going to Casa Italia.” Which was again a very nice restaurant but thankfully wasn't nearl y as expensive as Okinawa.

“Ooh, nice. Fingers crossed that everything works out for you and that he doesn't turn out to be a creep.”

“Thanks. He seems really sweet so far.”

You slowed as you reached the restaurant from which you were picking up lunch. “I gotta run, but thanks for listening.”

“Hey, any time. Let's FaceTime soon, okay?”

“Okay. Bye, Rox.”

“Bye.”

You hung up and repocketed your phone, slightly disappointed when you didn't have another text from Matt waiting for you.

Even though your arrangement was strictly business, he made you feel like you mattered -- which was way more than you could say for DiStefano, Williams, and Abbott.

“Hey, how did the emergency hearing go?” Foggy asked as Matt walked into the office. 

“The judge granted the retrial,” Matt replied with a relieved sigh. “Now we just have to finish reviewing the rest of the evidence to find everything else we need to get Conrad's conviction overturned.”

He’d had to go to court first thing that morning for an emergency hearing -- a new client of theirs who had been wrongfully convicted of first-degree murder in the double shooting of his former fianceé and her then-husband (who had happened to be a U.S. senator) had been scheduled to be transferred from Rikers to a federal penitentiary in three days, but luckily while reviewing the case Matt had discovered a major discrepancy in what the responding officer had testified to on the stand versus what the police report had stated and managed to convince the judge not only to a retrial, but also to delay the transfer so Matt could have access to his client.

Foggy sighed. “You’d have thought that Sanders would've caught that, especially since his trial notes included what Officer Stanton had stated in his initial report.”

Matt shrugged. He had found in his and Foggy's years of law practice that most of the wrongful conviction cases they had taken on (and won) was because some harried public defender had botched their clients’ cases because of overlooked details (or in more than a few cases, just not caring since they weren't getting paid extra for it). “It happens. Either way I'm sure we'll be able to find what we need.”

“Yeah.” Foggy paused. “So hey, how was your date on Monday? Things were so crazy yesterday that I didn't even get to ask you about it.”

Matt smiled. Even though it hadn't actually been a date he had genuinely had a good time with you and was looking forward to your next evening out. “It was good.”

“And? I want details, man!”

“There really aren't many details to share -- she met me over here, we walked to the restaurant, had a nice dinner, then said goodbye and went our separate ways.”

“That’s it?” Foggy sounded disappointed. “Guess that means no second date then.”

Matt grinned and shook his head. “Actually, we made plans for tomorrow night before we left the restaurant.”

He took his phone out of his pocket and turned it back on. “Which reminds me…”

He waited for it to boot up and smiled when his phone announced that you had replied to his earlier text confirming your plans for dinner.

He tapped at his screen and waited as it read off your reply. “ That sounds great. What time and where would you like to meet?”

He tapped the ‘reply’ button. “ Is 7 PM at the restaurant okay with you?” With the retrial being granted, Matt knew that he would be staying late at the office since he needed to prepare.

“That sounds fine,” his phone dictated when you replied a few seconds later. “I'll see you then.”

“At least tell me about her if you're not going to give me specifics about your date,” Foggy said. “What does she do and is she hot?”

Matt chuckled. “She's an office assistant at an architectural firm not far from here and I really wouldn't know if she was hot, but what I do know is that she's nice and that we have a lot in common.”

“So when can we meet her?”

Matt shrugged. He wanted to make sure you were completely comfortable with his and your arrangement before he introduced you to his friends. “I don't know yet. Maybe in a few weeks? Depends on how things progress.”

He shook his head. “Anyway, let's get busy. We've got a trial to prepare for.”

[1ovede1uxe]

00. prologue ┊ ┊⋆ beyond the stars

synopsis - you've been sent to join the joestar crew on their mission to defeat dio by... dio? y/n is an undercover stand user who joins the sdc to report back to dio their findings and notes about their stands, up until a few moral dilemmas get in the way of your original mission.

Upon receiving Hol's texts, you ascend the stairs to Dio's room. A wave of dread washes over you, but not the intimidation you're used to. Dio wanted to see you. Specifically you. And it messed with your head big time. It's also likely this is another little joke that Hol wants to play on you. That has to be it, right? Just a sick joke, right? But he's never taken it this far as to disturbing Lord Dio. As you journey the vast halls of the mansion, you curse yourself for getting into this mess all that time ago.

Two years ago. I remember it so clearly. My graduation trip to Egypt. My mom went missing as we were strolling at night. One second she was there, the next she wasn't. I began to search like a madwoman, going down every street going in every business asking if they had seen her. I stumbled upon the wretched mansion and I was drawn to it. I called for anyone to open the door or greet me, but no answer. I entered anyways. I don't know why I did that. I finally reached a set of french doors at the end of a corridor after going up a seemingly endless flight of stairs. I heard her scream. Mom. I burst through the door just as he was about to drink her blood. It's all a blur to me but at the same time its just so clear. "Take me instead. Do what you want, but let my mother free." He let out a snide chuckle. I don't know why he agreed. I almost wish I hadn't in a way, I didn't know the consequences. I never saw my mom again. I hope she made it back home. After that it's hazy to me. I only remember the last moments that Lord Dio was with only me. I was pierced by the arrow. I was the test dummy for these stupid stand arrows that old hag brought him. The only somewhat positive thing out of this was my stand: Fly by Day.

Fly by Day - User can turn light energy into tools, objects, weapons and other items, and create structures/buildings of varying permanence. Users who have mastered this ability can use it for any size object, but bigger object take more work to grow. The objects created can only be things the user has touched with their own hands.

"Your stand should prove useful, creating a strength out of my one weakness." The twisted man said. Can I even call him a man? He's a monster. During my time in Dio's hell hole, I did get to meet Mariah and Hol Horse. I guess thats a positive, but I guess my only friends are a khaki cowboy and also Mariah, who was tough to warm up to.

You entered Lord Dio's room. Aromas of frankincense and the musk of myrrh flood my nose. "Ah, (y/n). It is time you prove your use to me for more than just materials."

"What is it you wish, Lord Dio?" You kneel to the ground in his presence, not wishing to upset him.

"I have a special mission for you. It appears my other young underlings have failed. They've not only failed, but joined the loathsome Joestars. My head with this body isn't capable of maintaining my connection with the Joestars much longer and my understanding is you're close in age to them, so you're impressionable to them. I command you do the same as those who have failed. Join them"

"Forgive me, but I'm not understanding."

"You'll go under a guise of being transformed from my minion to one of them."

"I understand, Lord Dio." This could be my break.

"Just remember, (y/n). It's been a while since you've left the mansion. If you attempt to run, what little of a life you have left will be gone."

With that, and the little motivation of a known false freedom, I was on my way to go find these so called crusaders.

Yay! Prologue is knocked out! Sorry if Dio is a bit out of character, I wasn't really sure how to write him! By the time the next Dio interaction happens, I'm sure I'll have better practice by then. please send any constructive criticism or comments on what can be changed! much love to you all <3

taglist is open! request through askbox :)

next chapter // masterlist

[kenziedrawz]

Malfunction.

- A Ruikasa g/t fic - cross posted on AO3 -

fic underneath the cut. - 2,106 words

Rui quickly locked the bathroom door behind him, muttering an apology to whatever students who would want to do their business or whatever. Thankfully it was empty when he went inside, otherwise he didn't know what he'd do. He placed a collar shaped device onto the counter, how had it broken? He was sure that it worked fine this morning. So there should have been no issues! But, either way, his regulator had broken. And that was very bad, because without it he couldn't control his abilities.

His body already felt tight, he knew that he should try to calm down but he just couldn't right now.

But when did it break? Why did it break? He didn't know, but he had to fix it as soon as possible. He dug through his pockets to try and find a tool, any tool, but his rapid search turned up fruitless as he realized he left his tools on the rooftop. On the rooftop, with Tsukasa. Tsukasa, who surely must be very confused because he just bolted out of the roof top.

He felt sorry for suddenly ditching the blond with no explanation, but this was an emergency. One so grave that if he didn't fix the problem he might destroy the school, or be seen as a gigantic monster by everyone he knows. He stared down at the faulty latch of the collar, he was fucked.

Either he miraculously found a screwdriver in his pocket or he had to keep a grip on his form long enough to go back up to the roof top to get the one he left on the rooftop. And that meant he had to confront Tsukasa. But what would Tsukasa think? Would he call him a monster? Would he kick him out of Wonderlands x Showtime? Would he just simply not believe him?

God, he needed to calm down. the counter was already drifting away from him.

Unfortunately, he didn't find a screwdriver.

He was screwed.

His head hit the ceiling, reminding him of his current problem. Right, he just needs to calm down... but how could he when his secret, his very big secret, was in danger of being revealed? He just couldn't, but maybe he could keep calm enough to not destroy the bathroom? Yeah, yeah he could probably do that. He took a deep breath, held it, and then let it out slowly.

There was a knock on the door, was it a teacher? No, it was much worse. " Rui? Are you alright?" Tsukasa's voice rang from the other side of the bathroom door, concern in the blond's tone. He should have known that Tsukasa would eventually follow him, he must have seen Rui enter the bathroom. Crap, this was bad.

" I- I'm fine, Tsukasa-kun." Rui replied, quieting his voice so it would sound normal. Tsukasa must have picked up on the anxious strain in his voice as the blond didn't leave. Damn it, why was his star so stubborn?

" You don't sound fine, Rui." Tsukasa replied, Rui could just imagine Tsukasa's puffed cheeks and stern hands on hips pose. The thought made him internally chuckle, it was cute, but he still didn't shrink. " Do you need help? Can I come in?"

" No- I mean- I'm fine, I can handle this by myself." Rui hastily answered, hoping that Tsukasa would take the hint and hopefully give him some time alone to calm down. But unfortunately, He didn't hear Tsukasa walk away. Maybe Rui could retreat to the SEKAI if things got bad? No, Tsukasa could still follow him there and find out.

Wait, did he even have his phone on him? If he didn't... Well, then he was even more screwed. He couldn't call his parents or text Nene to bring him a screwdriver.

The door was opening, he forgot that this bathroom's main door was easy to get open even if it was locked. Tsukasa was going to see him, fuck, no no no no no no no-

" Rui, I'm coming in to help you whether you want my help or not!-" Tsukasa froze as he stepped into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. The blond stared up to meet Rui's panicked gaze, his amber eyes slightly widened. Rui was prepared for him to scream, to try and run away, to faint dramatically. But he really wasn't prepared for what Tsukasa actually did.

The blond took a deep breath, holding his hands in front of his face in a prayer motion before he lowered them with an exhale. " Okay, this isn't the weirdest thing I've seen." The blond muttered under his breath before looking back up at Rui. " So, how'd this happen?" Tsukasa asked.

" You... aren't afraid?" Rui asked, staring down at Tsukasa with confusion and curiosity. 

" Well, this isn't the weirdest thing I've ever seen." Tsukasa said with a shrug. " Considering that we've been stranded on an island before, and the whole world made from my feelings that exists this isn't actually the strangest thing that could have happened." He explained. Rui let out a sigh of relief, thanking whatever gods there were that Tsukasa didn't seem to be afraid of him.

Silence hung between them, whether it was comfortable or not is debatable. It was almost peaceful until Tsukasa spoke up again, inching closer to the gigantic director. " So, to restate my question from earlier, how exactly did this happen Rui?" The blond asked, staring up at the other man.

This made Rui panic a little, what would he do? would he tell Tsukasa the truth? Or would he lie to the troupe leader? Would Tsukasa be scared of him if he told him the truth? Or would he be accepting? These questions swirled in Rui's mind like an endless whirlpool of anxiety, one that only calmed when he felt Tsukasa's tiny hand brush against his knuckles. God, Tsukasa was so tiny compared to him, one wrong move could send him flying through a wall or worse.

So Rui did the best thing he thought he could do in this situation, avoid the question. 

" Nevermind that Tsukasa-kun,  I'll tell you later." Rui lied, or well, it was more of a half lie. Rui still didn't know if he wanted yo tell Rui the truth yet, he honestly hoped that the blond would forget that Rui was supposed to tell him later. " But for now, could you help me a bit?" He asked.

Tsukasa looked up at him, their height difference bigger than it had ever been before as the small blond nodded. Tsukasa's hand was still on his knuckle, hell, he'd even began stroking his knuckle as if he were petting a dog. Rui's heart fluttered at the sight and he swore that he shrunk down a bit. No, he definitely shrunk down a bit. " Rui! You're- You're shrinking now?" Tsukasa said with a surprised gasp, it must have been a significant size change then.

" It- It's a side effect." Rui lied again, the fear of Tsukasa running away ever present in his tone. He felt the urge to hold onto Tsukasa to prevent the blond from running away if he decided to, but that would make them both panic. And not to even mention how he could accidentally hurt Tsukasa. It was a bad idea all in all. He looked down again, seeing the concern in Tsukasa's eyes as the blond gazed up at him. Oh- right, and he was still caressing his knuckle ever so gently. The actions of the blond were still somehow strangely calming, as if he was a flower of lavender being held close to him. Then again Tsukasa isn't purple.

Wait. He was supposed to be doing something, right? Oh yeah, his regulator.

" Tsukasa-kun, you didn't happen to bring down any of my screwdrivers, did you?" He asked the blond, who was still much smaller than him. You wouldn't believe the sigh of relief he let out when Tsukasa nodded. " Could you hand it to me? I know that it might seem that I'd be clumsy with these large hands of mine, but I have a precise hand, fufu~" Rui smiled when Tsukasa handed him the screwdriver, he held it in his fingers for a few seconds in order to get the best possible grip on it before he plucked the collar from the counter. He eyed the latch carefully as he brought the screwdriver to it. He got to work on the latch. And if the author knew how to write about Rui fixing the latch, then they would absolutely do that, but they don't.

After Rui had fixed the latch, he stared down at the collar in his hand. He just needed to shrink down in order to put it on. But he was still nervous. So with a sigh he placed the device back onto the countertop, to Tsukasa's confusion. " Rui?" The blond asked, having found a nice spot to wait against Rui's ankle. Tsukasa had now moved from this position and had come closer to Rui himself. " Is something wrong?"

" Sorry, it's just... I won't be able to put it on unless I'm, y'know, regular sized again..." Rui explained, looking away from the blond. His attention was soon called back to Tsukasa however when he felt a tug on his cardigan, soon finding Tsukasa attempting the climb up the article of clothing. It was a cute sight to see, one that made Rui's heart swoon once more. It was like the little blond was climbing up a mountain, a mountain that could change size at any moment but still.

Soon, Tsukasa stood upon Rui's stomach, with Rui having to adjust himself slightly so Tsukasa wouldn't fall off. " Not to worry Rui! I will help you in anyway possible in order to restore your regular height!" Tsukasa proclaimed, it was a miracle that nobody had heard them. How thick were the bathroom walls anyways? Hopefully thick enough to conceal both their voices. He gave the blond boy a soft smile, already feeling a lot better.

And then he shrunk again, thus proven from a yelp by Tsukasa as the two fell to the floor. Tsukasa landed on top of the formerly gigantic director, who now only stood at around nine feet tall, almost knocking the wind out of the poor purple haired boy. " Are you alright Tsukasa-kun?" Rui asked, helping Tsukasa to a kneeling position on the ground by holding his shoulders. For a moment, Tsukasa's eyes looked like rapidly spinning yo-yo's before the blond shook his head to regain his focus.

" I'm fine!" Tsukasa replied, looking up at Rui. Rui hummed in reply, pulling the shorter in for a hug. The blond squeaked in surprise before reciprocating the cuddle semi-awkwardly before falling into it. It felt nice to be able to hold Tsukasa like this, with almost no worries. The tight feeling in his body had cooled down significantly, as it was no longer over taking each of his senses.

Of course, Rui Kamishiro can never have nice things since five seconds later he heard banging on the door. The first thought that came to his mind was to immediately hide. So he let go of the hug with Tsukasa, grabbing onto the blond's blazer pocket with one hand before instantly shrinking down enough to hide inside it. This of course, was a surprise to the blond who immediately gawked at Rui's sudden actions, of course, before Tsukasa could protest the teacher who'd been banging on the door moment's prior called out for them. Thus leaving Tsukasa to quickly scramble together a lie and hope that the teacher would believe it. Rui didn't really bother to listen to what the teacher and Tsukasa were saying, he was more focused on the comfort of Tsukasa's pocket.

It was nice, warm, and he could hear Tsukasa's heartbeat. It was also pretty dark though. He could hear Tsukasa getting scolded by the teacher for 'accidentally locking himself in the bathroom', poor Tsukasa, he'd certainly have to make it up to him later. Perhaps he could treat him some way? Take him on a date- friendly outing? Ah, right, he could only hope that Tsukasa took his regulator with him out of the bathroom as well. He could tell that by now they had left the bathroom because he could literally feel the vibrations that came with each of Tsukasa's steps. He could probably just fall asleep in here, Tsukasa wouldn't mind, right? The blond's blazer pocket simply had the downside of being too comfortable to resist the temptation. Tsukasa would probably wake him up for class...

probably.

[sampofan28]

MINI RANT ABT SMTH THAT ANNOYED ME

I was scrolling through a mha tag looking for fanart of one of the villains and i saw someone like talking about their opinions on each of the different characters and YKNOW ITS FINE TO HAVE DIFFERENT TAKES THATS OKAY I GET IF SOMEONE HATES/DISLIKES MY FAVORITE BUT THEY HAD A RLLY AWFUL TAKE ON SHIGIRAKI AND I NEEDED TO RANT.

ok so they stated they didn't like shigiraki because he lacked motivation WHICH IS A TAKE IVE SURPRISINGLY SEEN MORE THAN ONCE, AND I JUST WANNA BREAK IT DOWN.

Not every character needs a super strong motivation.

IDK MAYBE THATS A HOT TAKE BUT I CAN THINK OF PLENTY OF CHARACTER'S I LIKE WHO DON'T HAVE SUPER STRONG MOTIVATIONS. Actually same series, MR COMPRESS I LOVE THE GUY I DON'T, AS FAR AS I KNOW, THINK HE HAS SOME CRAZY STRONG MOTIVATION. This point might be more my personal opinions-y but i just wanted to say it. NEXT POINT:

2. Shigiraki DOES have a motivation

HIS MOTIVATION IS KILLING ALL MIGHT. I'm in season 3 rn, so maybe he suddenly changes his opinions later but as of the story he wants All Might dead, that is his goal, and to some extent he wants to destroy everything, to ruin hero soceity. I could see an arguement the latter is his true motivation, EITHER WAY HE DEFINITELY HAS ONE.

also ik some ppl look at character motivation differently so alternatively: you could argue his motivation is the rlly messed up event in his childhood with his family, or:

3. His raising by All for One.

OKAY SOME PEOPLE SEEM TO BE UNABLE TO UNDERSTAND THAT ALL FOR ONE MANIPULATED SHIGIRAKI, AND GROOMED HIM TO BE A TOOL. LIKE IT IS VERY BLATANT; he took in shigiraki as a child, after (SPOILERS)

(i couldn't figure out how to do the spoilered text on tumblr sorry)

shigiraki had killed his own family, and he convinced shigiraki it was all his fault, that he'd meant to do that, that he had evil inside him, an urge to destroy. Shigiraki is the product of over a decade of manipulation and grooming, and it also made blatanlty clear that he is not mentally well, probably depressed LIKE EVEN IF YOU DONT COUNT THAT AS A MOTIVATION THE MANIPULATION IS A REASONING BEHIND HIS ACTIONS.

IDK IFTHIS MAKES SENSE JUST BUGS ME WHEN PPLHATE ON A CHARACTER I LIKE FOR A REASON THATS FACTUALLY WRONG. (IVE PROLLY DONE THE SAME BEFORE WITHOUT REALZIING BUT YEH IDK)

ANWYAYS RANT OVER.

[nacregames]

Hello! Sorry if this is a stupid or uninformed question, but may I ask why you are moving from CoG to Twine? I'm only asking because I myself was planning to write IF on CoG but have since seen a lot of authors move platforms, and I have no idea why...

Hi! It's not a stupid question at all. There are many reasons why I personally switched from CoG to Twine, but I think the main reason why the majority did was because of the toxic community over there.

I've never been truly active on the forum, but it was apparently bad enough for lots of people to talk about and that's how I heard about it too. Some of the readers were said to be very rude to the authors and others, who showed support were suspended for very banal reasons. Also the mods did not take care of the situations properly and actually caused everything to escalate further by applying the guidelines and rules to their own liking/opinion. It was a very messed up situation all over.

I think this will make you help understand better: [link]

The "breaking point" for me though, was that this little evil man called Jason S. H. (CoG staff) supported NFTs and let me tell you friend, I will never ever touch that BS and all that other crypto currency shit. Nor will I work with or for somebody who supports it. I don't care if it was just an idea or his own personal opinion or whatever, I just didn't want to risk falling into that pit and so I decided to switch to Twine as early as possible. I didn't like the idea of being on edge and having to worry about this, especially since that man already has his little villain campaign going on over there and it's spreading like a virus.

Apart from that...well you can do whatever you want with Twine, while you obviously can't with Choicescript. You see, cs is a very easy and practical coding language and it was so much fun using it for my game, but as fun as it is, it's just not worth the trouble. You can do the same and more with Twine. You can even save your game, add images, music, and overall give your game a personal touch. The options are limitless and there's no one to tell you what to do.

Twine is an open source narrative engine and the community is already big enough to make the learning process as good and fast as it was with cs. It was very difficult at first since there were so few authors using it, but that's not the case now. Even if you have are a very slow learner or have a hard time coding, if it's your story you want to share, you can do that.

TL;DR: Long story short, ppl on the CoG forum (mods and readers alike) were mean and Twine offers so much more possibilities to design your game and has way less restrictions!

If you need a quick rec of narrative game engines, here's a list:

Narrat is a very nice engine too, but since it's still new, it's not as "fleshed" out as Twine, but there's a community to help with problems for it too, and it grows with each day! I'm personally trying to figure it out, since I plan to use it in the future.

Inkle writer (or Ink) is pretty much the same, though way easier to use since you can literally just click which command you wanna use and it inserts it itself. Like e.g add a variable or make a choice etc. It's actually a nice tool for scripting purposes, tho I'm not sure how much exactly you can do with it, so there's that.

You could also just use Ren'py. It's generally used for VNs, but you can just as well use it for strictly text-based games. The community is huge, you can always ask for help and you can code the wildest things with it since it uses python. I mean it's said to be for beginners, but I found it more difficult than Twine, so take that as you will. But anyway, I don't think there are any restrictions to either Twine or Ren'py tho I'm just an amateur and are throwing wild guesses in here lol.

[detroitbecomeonline]

DBH MODDING (1) - HOW I MADE JUICY

Hi everyone :) I'm going to start a lil mod diary because I'm trying my best to learn how to do stuff with like, 0 prior understanding. I'm writing everything I find out because frankly, I can't find info like this elsewhere. I have to figure everything out myself. If you're like me, and have no experience or knowledge in manual modding what-so-ever, I hope this series of entries will help you! If anyone has any information or extra points, PLEASE say something lol. If I'm wrong, I'm begging you to correct me!!!

It's currently 30/12/2022 and for the last 3 days, I've been looking at modstuffs for Detroit: Become Human. I started with the browser model swapper and successfully located the game file it needs. For me, I downloaded DBH through Steam, so I go the HDD (where I keep my Steam stuff) > steamapps > common > Detroit Become Human > and the file will be in the list of BigFiles. HOWEVER I made a new folder just on my HDD called "Original BigFile_PC idx" and copied and pasted the original file into there so if anything breaks, I can just plug my original back in.

That's how I can get shots like this, because I swapped Connor's game model for North's:

I have been hanging out in a DBH modding server, and they're talking words my uneducated ass can hardly understand. But what I have picked up is this:

Mokit is like, movement capture? Like how Bryan explained that the little dots on his face capture the actors movement. And there are a bunch of cameras and stuff. idk here's a YouTube vid. So anyway these movements are saved in files and you can switch mokits with characters.

Pretty sure points on mokits are labelled or something, because in the model swapper, an elbow is an elbow, whether you're North or Sumo.

And so also in the model swapper, you can switch out these files. I have no idea how to do this manually. I haven't experimented with the mokit swaps yet anyway.

After that, I downloaded the Custom Texture Tool (also found in More Tools) and yesterday I cracked it open. Here's what it looks like upon opening:

I locate my game through HDD > steam > steamapps > common > Detroit Become Human. Then this all comes up on the left:

And I'm like dang. I have no idea what any of this does, but what's really cool is that I can see which files are attributed to which BigFile (which I previously couldn't open). Immediately I go for the catalogue, because SURELY that's where the textures live. It looks like this when I open up the Catalogue tab.

I chilled out and browsed the files for a bit before searching for Connor. I really liked how these files are named just because of story structure and specific scenes. It makes so much sense, thank you CONNOR_INTO2.

So rn I can't view a lot of files and I didn't quite understand why, but after a quick Google, it's because you need a specific program to grab em. But anyway, you see that black-red-green-blue square in the third row fifth column in the screenshot? I was like oh man. I know what THIS is for. I export the DDS file (I save the image) and it opens up in PAINT DOT NET. so im like ok ok i'll do it. I gotta.

Using Common Sense, I swatch the red and the green and I keep the text in the parameters of where the old text was so that it goes on Connor's uniform in the right spot. I have no idea what the red and green colours mean. After that, I save it as a separate file in another folder on my HDD. Here is a comparison of the before and after:

I don't know why they have to be upside down, but yep. + Sorry, it's unfortunate I can't upload the Juicy texture to this post. Must be to do with the DDS file format or whatever.

Anyway, this was the result:

crying

So I'm like okay, I understand this a little. I want to colour other stuff. After a whole bunch of dicking around with files (and I will not document my painful process), I watch a video on texture maps. My mind BLEW because:

I could identify the normal maps (purple ones).

I understand now that roughness maps will be the maps that make uniform textures shine or not. (I don't know which ones are roughness maps yet).

A few more things:

This is Connor's uniform jacket and this is his belt, but they're completely different texture maps. I have no idea what the red and green mean. Maybe it's to communicate to the roughness maps what to apply? (Shiny belt buckle vs leather strap.) And for Connor's jacket, here is where I can change the colour and look, but it won't change the fabric texture and actual shape. Anyway, so I'm going to download a 3D model program to see if that gives me a better understanding of things.

I'll update you soon!

~ Trinity

[art-i-know-yes]

AHHHHHHHHHHH SPOILERS FOR LIMITED LIFE

got the notification during lunch. stimming uncontrollably. crying.

this is tango's view im watching. i'll be watching Tango, Jimmy, Grian, Martyn, maybe Scott, maybe BigB

TWENTY FOUR HOURS

SCOTT WAS BOOGEY AND HES QUICK WITH IT

ANOTHER BOOGEY

SKIZZ HAS ALREADY LOST 2 HOURS

BDUBS OMG

"WHERE IS THE SUSPENSE"

so what it's 2 per episode

I HAVE A TEST BUT I'LL BE BACK

SCARRRRR

I think I'm about to have like a stim attack or smth. my teeth are chittering

HE ADDED ANOTHER

IM GOING TO GO FAIL MY TEST BYE

im actively ignoring school work

ah Tango noises

ohhh scar and bdubs

love the groups so far

skizz noises

ohhh scar's pitching

ETHO in the nether

"like the we!"

JIMMY AND JOEL BAD BOIS

BREAKING THE #1 RULE

"I only killed Skizz!" "ONLY?!"

"you replaced me with a cow etho!" :0 boat boys ref!

Grian's got diamonds

"sorry rancher!" AHHHHHHH

don't be burny. plz.

Tango influencing speech

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LOST HIM

"can we do better"

etho hiding stuff immediately

CLEO DEATH

constantly losing cows

tempting death

impulse and skizz

skizz is not ok

WOOOO

tango's got text on the screen. which makes me feel like 'this tool will come in handy later'

and two out of three statements come true

oooooo and impulse

skizz's third hour gone

"their death cry!"

everyone is so much more careless

MARTYN

you know who was better at keeping cows alive? no no im totally over it

*gets redstone* "alright i'm going to put the sugarcane down"

WHO'S BOMBED YOU

all of them against the walls immediately

"no one's allowed in" "top security"

"no I locked my door"

Big B death and Martyn boogey

ditched the cave then

the door

of course the clock

6

YEAH

"explosion?" "i didn't hear anything"

all great things to the homewreckers

IMPULSE. GIVES. HIM. THE. CLOCK. AGAIN.

*starts choking*

AN AMPHITHEATER???

you've killed all the cows

"im okay with chickens" in the most dead inside voice

you know who else had a chicken hole. IM OVER IT.

was i ever on main about how normal i am about the ranchers

why are you making a mob farm

you wanna die again skizz???

lmao let's ignore the tornado warning at my school rn

"Well he's the smart one"

"we're building YOU this season"

anyway im so normal and ok and im normal-

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

and I don't know if these are the correct tags . i did them as soon as the video came out so.

[rileyandreagan-blog]

9-14-2023

My dearest Riley & Reagan,

its been over 3 years since I've written, and I'm so sorry for this absence. Riley, by now this has been a few letters in that I've written to you but Reagan, this is the first for you.

Girls, I'm sorry that most of what you read on here is always daddy being sad or daddy being depressed but honestly this is my way of venting and also giving you girls some insight into who mommy and daddy are. Mommy & daddy got married on a Friday, February 22nd 2019. as of today we have been married for a little over 4 years. Daddy loves you guys so much and I would do my best to never hurt you. 2 days ago on 9-12-2023, Mommy has decided that we separate and possibly get a divorce. Now, I just want you to know that this has nothing to do with you and you girls are our first priority. I don't want a separation and/or divorce but daddy has to let mommy go and have her space for now hoping that one day she will come back and love me again, just as much as she loves the both of you. Riley, I've told you before that I promise I would never lie to you and that I would always be open with whatever information you would want to know and I plan to hold that same promise to you, Reagan.

In the beginning, daddy wasn't always the best daddy. I was a bad guy who did nothing but selfish things and cared for nobody but myself. it took a long time for me to learn how to be the daddy that you know today and it wasn't an easy thing to do but I'm sure you'll hear the phrase "nothing worth it comes easy". I hurt mommy emotionally and also physically. I never beat her nor had any intentions on hurting her physically but there has been an instance where I threw her on the bed to prevent her from fighting with mama and she says I threw her against a wall. Now that's not how I recall it but I can't be the one to say I didn't do it if that's what she felt. I also pushed her aside to the point that she almost fell over trying to get Reagan out of the car. I'm not proud of these things and I completely regret my actions and how I was. I want to be the best example of how a man should treat your mom as well as you girls in the future when you decide to date. Now, Riley you're only 10 currently and Reagan you're only 2 so I have some time to get better and improve so that when the time comes I have all the tools I need to be a better daddy for you and hopefully a better husband for mommy.

Mommy wants a separation which means I had to move out of the house and back into mamas house so that she can have her space. This is only happening because daddy messed up and was flirting and talking to other women through text. Now, I just want you girls to know just what I told mommy. I never had intentions of meeting up or even being with anyone else but your mommy. I just wanted that emotional attention that your mommy wasn't able to give me. Mommy has also been very short, distant, and cold towards daddy for a few years now and that's what caused me to seek attention in other places. Just to be clear, what daddy did was wrong and it should have never happened. People make mistakes and its up to them to learn from it or run deeper into it.

Daddy's heart breaks every single day not having mommy around and it breaks even more because I can't see you girls every single day like I'm used to. I love and miss you guys and your mommy so much that this pain is making it hard for me to breathe. I've been surviving these past few days and just existing with no motivation or desire to do anything but sleep hoping that the time will pass by faster so that mommy and daddy can be together again. I can't sleep well, I can't eat, and I can't even think straight because I'm constantly thinking about you guys, my family. I've been praying for the past few years hoping that mommy can find her way back to me but so far it's been a hard uphill battle. It started making daddy sad and even sometimes mad. There's even been times I'm mad at God for not hearing my prayers and it's been making me not believe that he listens to daddy. I was listening to music hopefully to make me feel better and I came across a song that made me cry because it spoke to me and how I'm hurting.

"I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing Just prayin' to a God that I don't believe in 'Cause I got time while she got freedom 'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even"

I have hope that one day, mommy will love daddy just as much and we will be all together again, a family. I can't let you girls know enough that I love you with all my heart and I miss you.

you guys are still young and this might be confusing right now but one day, it'll be clear and easier to understand. I just want to say sorry for not being the best daddy you thought I was. I hope I can change that and you can forgive me and love me as much as I love you two and mommy. I'll do my best to write you more often and let you know how I am.

From the bottom of my heart with love,

Daddy

[aspen-mayne]

As an autistic person, I've found that professional types of writing are the source of many meltdowns for me. My roommate and I got into a discussion today about just how inaccessible some of these writings are, i.e. research papers, tax forms, job listings, etc.

I've spent the last few months job hunting. During this process, I found myself needing anywhere from 2-14 days of recovery time after doing an afternoon of job hunting because my meltdowns were so taxing, and I am in burnout. I realized a big reason I kept having severe meltdowns was because the job postings were overwhelming. For every job I looked at, I found myself breaking down every sentence into small pieces I could understand. For every piece I didn't know, I had to Google it. Reading through a job description in itself was a chore.

I found myself working up to a meltdown today while filling out forms for a job orientation. What should have taken a person 30 minutes or less, took me 1.5 hours. I had to Google every question and analyze it to understand exactly what I was being asked, so I would not be penalized or fined for answering something incorrectly.

Now, I am a college graduate. I graduated on time with honors and a minor. During college, I found myself breaking down and analyzing texts, articles, and even lectures. It was a wonderful skill I developed, that I often used to help other students digest information when it was overly difficult. This skill helped me to consistently get some of the best grades in class.

But I am struggling here. In the real world.

By all means, I should be okay reading job listings and filling out paperwork, but it's extremely difficult. And I have to wonder, if it's hard for me, someone who has the tools and experience digesting hard to understand pieces of writings, then how hard are these things for other people who don't have that? How accessible is our system really?

I know some people just get it. But I also know that if I'm struggling, others are too. And other people may not have the skills I do that help make things not completely inaccessible to them. And I just- It hurts. I'm angry about it. The things that are vital to survival in America shouldn't be this hard to understand. I should be able to apply for jobs or fill out tax forms without needing recovery time.

If you've ever sat in front of your computer crying over FAFSA, tax forms, job applications, or anything else because it's hard to understand, I'm so sorry.

[brawltogethernow]

Very good advice you had re: writing more succinctly. A related problem—some scenes are blow-by-blow, some events are vague in passing. Transitioning from scenes with less detail > more detail is easy but knowing when /how to drop it and go back is SO hard for me. any advice on that?

Thank you! It sounds like I'm your polar opposite here, so I'm not qualified to tell you how to tackle this. I'm gonna throw some guesses anyway but I'm just saying.

You could probably train yourself up on managing this with a writing exercise too - I'm making this up on the spot, but maybe take an exhaustingly layed out scene you've written (or written by somebody else!) and rewrite it zoomed out a level, and then another level, and so on until the whole thing is brushed past e.g. "One Fall, he fell in love." Just to familiarize yourself with the tools available to you in a deliberate manner/practice the "how" part. Practice sketches and technical exercises are not heavily associated with being a writer, but they're useful.

I'm hesitant to advise you to stop before writing a very zoomed in scene and interrogate what the benefits of keeping the camera so close are going to be, because for me places where I didn't think there was anything to say tend to be ~where the magic happens~, buuuut. Maybe you need to do that. Everybody's writing process needs different maintenance, which is why so much writing advice from successful authors sucks.

That established, maybe pause periodically as you're going to check whether the amount of effort you're exerting on detail is rewarding or not. You are a limited resource and you gotta optimize how you expend yourself. Similarly, and often contestingly, your readers are finite mortals bargaining a precious fragment of their lifespan on your implicit promise your story will have an enjoyable ebb and flow. (Page counts are also theoretically finite, which if you publish exclusively online it can be helpful to remember for the purpose of keeping yourself civilized and breaking conventions with purpose.) If you shift gears to hit only the key notes of the next scene, will you mourn what you left out later? Will your story be worse? Or not so much? If it's the latter why NOT do less?

Horribly, planning in advance so you're following a preexisting roadmap while writing can really help with that kind of question. (This is also something everybody does differently while regarding others' processes with baffled disgust. Trial and error is key. I am very sorry.)

I'm way less twitchy about suggesting shaking down a scene demanding to know what it's done for you lately after it's written, while you're editing. If the answer is "nothing" it's time to get the gun. (The gun is copy-pasting deleted text to a word document of ephemera.) But like, is this paragraph forwarding the reader's understanding of the plot, a relationship, worldbuilding, characterization, story aesthetic? It's probably doing at least one of these things, in which case the best path may be to combine it with a planned or existing scene. Plot threads get stronger if you twist them together into a plot rope. Turning the...fibers of ideas into...the cable that is your story. ...It's 3 a.m. as I'm writing this. AHEM, anyway. I'm a proponent of writing dense over writing vague (which is probably why I'm tired all the time; see previous point RE: resources): If you spilled out a whole bunch of details, they're probably there for some reason. ...Unless they really aren't?? In which case train yourself to notice when you're writing empty air and stopping.

All that said, once they're invested people like details, and if readers weren't resilient to suboptimal pacing people couldn't read webcomics update by update, so don't sweat it too much.

[modern-vellichor]

Motion Sickness

summary: Bucky's Handler finally breaks. pairing: bucky (winter soldier) x reader warnings: grief, torture, angst, violence a/n: Motion Sickness by Phoebe Bridgers (Demo - Bonus Track, my fave version)

Masterlist || Bucky Barnes Masterpost || Lay A Little Love On Me

As Soldat's hand tightened around your throat, tears began to fall down his cheeks. You were sobbing, begging your creation for your life. You regretted everything you had ever done, but it was that or be killed. You loved him, loved him like he was... you didn't know what he was.

"I hate you for what you did," he growled.

"Don't do this," you whispered.

"I can hardly feel anything, I hardly feel anything at all!"

"I can fix you," you begged. "I know how to get Bucky back."

He dropped you at that. The first mention of his past self ever uttered within these walls. He had killed your whole team already. There was no reason to let you live, until this.

"I didn't want to break you, Bucky. I had to, they'd have killed me otherwise."

He said nothing else, just took you with him when he made his escape. You sobbed with relief when you were a safe distance from the torture chamber that you had called home for most of your life.

"You know, they had me working part time on another serum, like the one we gave you. But just the slowed aging, not the superhuman strength or anything, just for us biologists, or whatever you want to call us."

He grunted in response, pulling you further away from the compound.

Somehow you ended up in Manhattan. Bucky got a job doing God knows what and you spent your days locked up in an apartment that Bucky visited in the evenings. He brought you all sorts of trinkets and tools to toy with, chemicals and reagents, expensive metals and all sorts of high end scientific equipment. Sometimes he would stay to eat, but he never slept or stayed longer than a few hours. Sometimes he would disappear for weeks at a time with nothing but a text.

"Here," you said quietly. Handing him a wad of cash, and then returning your focus to your overcooked dinner.

"What's this?"

"there's a hypnotherapist upstate, go see her. She can help you."

"but you could do it for free."

You shook your head. You could do it. You were trained for it. But ethically, morally you couldn't. Not after all you'd put him through.

"you're giving me 1500 to see a hypnotherapist?"

You nodded.

He would only go once, but you let it slide. It was hard. This last year had been hard. You let everything he did slide. Like sleeping on the floor, and disappearing, and never speaking to you, and controlling you. You had done the same to him for all those years. You remember sleeping next to him on the cold, damp concrete because you were scared he felt lonely. You never feared your death, even though you always through it was coming. You always thought he would wind his hand around your neck one night and you would never wake up, and you welcomed that idea with open arms. Freedom and rest.

"Bucky?" You called tentatively. His grunts were muffled by the closed door, but you were worried. He had come home covered in blood and went straight to his room and shut the door. Whether it was his blood or not, you still worried.

You opened the door just enough to peek through. He threw his knives at the wall and angrily shucked off his uniform. He stood with his back facing you, bruised and bloodied, several stab wounds weeping down the expanse of his back.

He turned around suddenly, eyeing you up and down with a murderous glint in his eyes. You slammed his door and ran out of the apartment. You leaned your back against the front door, bare feet on the carpet of the hallway. You heard his heavy footsteps echo through the apartment, you knew he was mirroring your stance inside the apartment, pressing a bloody imprint of his back into the door.

You'll be glad that you made it out.

"I'm sorry that it all went down like it did," you whispered. He heard you and thudded away from the door and back into the safety of his bedroom.

You've got a sort of heartache that will never resolve itself. It will never leave you. You carry a deep rooted guilt. a type of grief that embeds itself into the very fibre of your being. It's complicated and everlasting. It's the kind of sadness that follows you around like a dog with a bone. It looms over you, threatening and ominous. You know in your heart that this guilty grief will last forever.

"What's wrong with you?" He asks one day.

You rack your brain for a simple answer. A simple sentence to sum up the vast expanses of all your emotional turmoil. You stutter over your words for a bit, and Bucky is uncharacteristically patient.

"I have emotional motion sickness," you say finally. "And there's no one to roll the window down."

He nods, in agreement or in sympathy you don't know.

"There are no words in the English language that I could scream to drown it out."

"I know how that feels."

"and I wanna know what would happen if I surrender to the sound."

He reaches over the table and grabs your hand. You flinch. His touch is cold. You attempt to pull your hand away, wanting to wallow rather than be comforted. He doesn't let go. Instead he pulls you in, so his face is mere inches away from yours. He presses a cold, unsure kiss to your cheek. Tears well in your eyes. You choke on guilt that bubbled up from your soul into a throat that twists and constricts until you can no longer breath and you are sobbing and gasping for air.

He holds your face gently while you sob. You try to scream but your voice fails you. You wail and cry until it seems your body has been drained, of tears, of blood, or life. Suddenly you are nothing but a shell, Bucky sees a mirror of who he used to be.

He presses his lips to yours and you gasp. He holds you still, his hands cold against your cheeks. Life and colour and salt and blood and water and wine bleed into your empty corpse once again, air fills your lungs and you feel brand new, Everything is bursting with colour and alive and screaming and while you didn't ask you are suddenly bursting full of life and everything seems good again.

"Thank you," you breath.

he just nods and leaved. He shuts the door quietly behind him. You don't know when he'll be back but you're free of your once sided dependency and the city seems undaunting and the air seems fresh. Looks like things will be alright.

[prayforelves]

hi! I know you're probably going to add on to your woodcarving text posts in the near future, but I figure it wouldn't hurt to ask a question rn anyway. if anything it'll give you another topic for later. :)

I'm a noob at woodcarving (I only did some experimental cuttings on a block and i carved exactly one little 1" sphere... like last year 🙈) and I'm starting to get the itch to try it again.

anyway, my question: do you have to worry about the grain of the wood at all when you start carving? I'm not sure if going against the grain would cause your piece to splinter & break or if it'd just be fine, but I don't wanna waste my basswood. but also, if you're carving something totally 3d, won't you have to carve against the grain at some point anyway no matter what??? I really don't get it 😅

sorry if this is weird or confusing lol. and no worries about answering quickly. (or at all honestly. and you can just answer this through one of your woodcarving 101 posts if you want.)

I might just be brave and start messing around and not worry about the whole grain thing...

Ah, the good ol grain. Short answer: no, I don't really worry about grain direction too much when making a piece, and I'll give you the reasons why. But before that I will backstep and say that I do consider grain direction, but it's based on how I think the final product will look, not the difficulty of cutting it. And adding on to that, it can be difficult, depending on the wood species, which I'll address below as well.

Here's why grain direction doesn't bother me too much, and what you can do to help your carving go better!

1. Use sharp tools.

It makes a sh*tload of difference. For the first like, 6 months I started woodworking, I didn't really have sharp tools because I didn't have a stropping kit. Then, I bought a stropping kit, and my tools actually became sharp and like, 75% of my problems went away! So if you don't have a stropping kit, buy one here. It's a 100% worthwhile investment. I also recommend a whetstone if you do this enough. Consider stropping a daily activity and a whetstone more a ...weekly to monthly-ish activity. Buy one if you decide you like this hobby enough.

2. Some woods are just crappy to work with.

I spent like, months trying to get some cedar wood carved and it was having the grain splintering issue/just overall ugly cutting and you know what? I finally said THIS WOOD SUCKS I HAVE A BILLION OTHERS and threw it out. And I moved on to make other, better things. If it's not working for you, there's literally thousands of other types of wood to use. Some woods are better for certain things than others. Don't waste your energy trying to get some weird wood to do what it doesn't want to. (That said, if your tools aren't sharp then more woods will be crappy to work with, so make sure you've followed tip #1!)

3. Ditch the knives.

You mentioned you'd tried to carve a sphere in the past--spheres are one of the hardest shapes to carve in my experience! Whenever I start running into a plane or shape that's giving me consistent trouble, I'll pull out the rasp, file, or some rough sandpaper and try to shape it with those. You can use more than just knives for woodworking! And you don't have to wait to sand until the end! Shape it however works for you. Make it your bitch. But listen to the grain--different planes require different approaches.

Hope this helps!

[inkdemonapologist]

SESSION TWELVE of the BatIM Call of Cthulhu game, aka Continuing to have a Great Time At The Masquerade! : )

Joey and Bendy destabilised early on, meaning Joey went through the ENTIRE masquerade UNABLE TO STOP SMILING

getting some mixed messages here, Joey

Sometimes u dress ur characters up as rabbits for fun but then you have a lot of emotions about them losing their minds and then u gotta draw them losing their minds while dressed as rabbits... anyway Jack being mind-controlled did NOT help Sammy hold onto his mental stability at this nightmare party in case you were wondering,

ANYWAY HAVE, MORE OUT-OF-CONTEXT QUOTES, UNDER THE CUT

[Sammy is played by me, Joey is played by Boo (inkyvendingmachine), Henry is played by Maf (inkcryptid), Jack is played by Mochi (whatyouwantedmetosee) and Thren (haunted-hijinxer) is our GM!]

[GM] Joey, make a POW roll also... [Joey] Oh, boy, [GM] ...because Bendy was also told to enjoy this party, and you guys just passed a plate of food, and he wants to eat! [Jack] FEED YOUR SON! [Joey] No!!! [Henry] HES A HUNGRY BOY! [Sammy] A GROWING BOY!

[Henry] Henry will look back to see if Moonlight is trying to follow them! [GM] He will see that Moonlight has grabbed onto the railing of the stairs and is hobbling slowly down them. [Joey] *extremely evil-sounding cackling*

[Jack] All Cthulhu Official Dice actually come weighted, to make you fail.

[Henry] Gotta try harder than that, bitch! [Henry] ....that wasn't in character. [Jack] It's in character, but he's only thinking it. [Sammy] That's the golden text you see on the wall if you use the seeing tool

[Henry] My Luck is 68, I don't know what y'all are doing! [Jack] We're spending Luck so that we'll fail! [Sammy] BEING UNLUCKY! I've barely spent any Luck, I'm just NOT A LUCKY GUY

[Henry] Oh, Avedon's here, [GM] There's a gunshot, and he tries to shoot Fowler! [Joey] Um, well, uh, whoops!, rest in peace Fowler! [Sammy] Yeah, that'll sort itself out, let's go! [GM] Moonlight seems to reconsider from telling people to grab you guys, to grabbing Avedon instead. [Joey] Oh! THANKS AVEDON, your sacrifice will, not be thought about in the slightest!!!

[Sammy] Is... weird question, does this room look like it matches the architecture of the rest of the house? [GM] [GM] [GM] ...make a sanity check.

[Sammy] It would be a like, Come on Jack, do you know where you are, shake it off, snap out of it, kind of thing. [GM] Why don't you make a... a.... oh boy, [Sammy] One of my REALLY persuasive social skills?

[GM] This probably just registers to Jack as, Sammy griping about a party, which isn't that strange. [Jack] Yeahhhh, he wants to leave. He always does that. I wanna stay at least a little longer! [GM] That just means it's Jack's job to find them something fun and good to do. [Sammy] Oh boy, [GM] I don't think Jack is being compelled to be aggressive about this necessarily, he just feels like he's Jack at a party, doing the things Jack normally does, and trying to have a good time! [Sammy] Ah, and everyone else is being weird, [GM] Yeah! Everybody's being really weird! You're at this nice party, and now you're in this weird room? The party's back there somewhere! [Jack] I mean not that he's opposed to bein' dragged into side rooms at parties by cute boys, but,

[GM] The table looks like a table that Henry has in his house, actually. [Sammy] Have I ever been in Henry's house? These are questions I didn't expect to need to ask tonight.

[Sammy] Jack, this is weird! You see this is weird, right?! [Jack] Well yeah, it is kinda weird that we're in-- what are we doing here? [Joey] Joey is going to grab Jack's arm, and point to the next door, and go "Party is this way!"

[GM] Peter looks worried... [Sammy] Sammy looks worried too! Well, Sammy looks angry, but in a worried way.

[Joey] Joey is going to scream frustratedly. [Sammy] Is there ink in this room? [GM] There is not. [Jack] Is there a party in this room? [GM] Definitely no, only the party you bring with you.

[Joey] Joey is going to scream again. [Joey] He's also going to kick the door. He might stub his toe. [Sammy] Through all this, Joey is smiling. I just need us all to remember that. [Joey] YES. Also his tail is furiously going. [GM] Bendy is also upset! There is nothing to eat here.

[Joey] Joey is going to try to feed Bendy some ideas, [GM] He doesn't want ideas, he wants food!

[Joey] So.... what happens if you fumble a sanity roll?

[GM] See, here's the silly part. At this point, right? At this point, the best place to do the tasks you want to do, involve either getting the stone out of the room with the safe, or having the staff that Henry is currently holding. [Sammy] So you would arrive, by completely different means, to the same place that we are! [GM] Clearly Joey is inside the safe.

[Jack] Bad and naughty Joey Drews get put in the safe to atone for their sins!

[Henry] Henry is going to channel his inner Joey Drew and round the corner and say "No, sorry about him, we're just here on inspection, we need to check the safe." [Henry] Which is probably a Fast Talk, which I hope it isn't, because my Fast Talk is a 5. [GM] Unless you wanna try to turn that into a persuade somehow? [Henry] I'll do Persuade! [GM] What are you doing to persuade them, rather than just lying? [Henry] *rolls* I failed... I'm gonna push it... [Sammy] *uneasy noises* IF YOU PUSH IT AND IT GOES BAD, IT GOES WORSE [Henry] AH! HAHA! I ROLLED A SIX! [Sammy] THAT'S STILL NOT LESS THAN FIVE! [Henry] WELL IM DOING PERSUADE! [Sammy] That means you have to NOT LIE! [Henry] ....Fuck. [Henry] Okay, uh, there's an emergency, we need the contents of that safe. [Sammy] THATS STILL A LIE??? [Joey] NO actually, THAT'S TRUE! [Henry] It IS an emergency!!

[Sammy] Sammy cannot believe that this is working.

[GM] Bendy does wonder what his plan is for getting out of the safe. This does not seem like a fun party place. [Joey] Um, [Joey] Joey says it's a surprise.

[GM] Henry, the safe does indeed open! And there's a Joey! [GM] Bendy says "Oh wow!" [Henry] Henry tries his best to keep a straight face, like yes! this is exactly what he came here for! [Sammy] (Sammy is NOT keeping a straight face) [Jack] (Straight? In this party?)

[Jack] He's probably saying something like, "What are you doing, he's one of us!" [Jack] And that could go either way. That could mean "No, he's chill, I will persuade you to stop!" Or that could mean, "We are also criminals!"

[GM, as the guards] Then why does he look like the Yellow King's messenger? [Henry] *not missing a beat* We get that a lot.

[GM] Something falls from the sky and lands in front of him. And it's a person! [Joey] Is he alive? [GM] Very much not. [Sammy] How... how Illusion of Living canon-compliant is this Joey...?

[Jack] So... it would probably occur to Jack that this is weird for a party,

[Henry] Joey don't touch it! [Joey] Why not? [Henry] There's runes around it. I don't know if you can touch it. [Joey] Joey's gonna touch it. [Henry] *long-suffering sigh* If you get zapped, I'll tell you I told you so!

[Jack] Jack really wishes we were just back at the party right now, you guys... [Jack] Only bad things have happened. [Jack] Pete's traumatised, Joey's goopy, the Lurker ate all of the snacks,

[Sammy] Can I try to break free from Henry? Sammy's gonna try to run over there. [Henry] At this point, Sam can go, if he wants. [Sammy] Okay, cool. Then Sammy's gonna go and put ink in his mouth! [Henry] Goddammit. I was hoping you were going to check on Joey!

[Joey] You can’t take all of the sanity hits! You have to leave some for other people! [Jack] Says you! You got so many temps!! And an indefinite!!

[GM] Bendy probably is complaining loudly about WHY DID HE WALK THROUGH THE RUNES??? [Joey] Oh! I thought he was going to complain about the party, or lack thereof, [GM] That’s part of not having fun at the party, he’s not into that! [Joey] Well, [GM] This is not a fun party activity!!

[GM] But he doesn’t think it will destroy either of them, if you do it right! [Jack] That’s a nice, way to end that sentence,

[Sammy] Let us hurry! May I take the stone? [Joey] Joey shrugs. [Sammy] Sammy will, uh, attempt to reach inside of... whatever this is, and find the stone. [Henry] Reach INTO your LOCAL boss, and you will find A Friend And Boy,

[Sammy] Is there anything in this room that I can pick up, and then hit him in the head with? [GM] Henry has a stick... uh....there’s a projector.... [Sammy] Can I pick that up? [GM] No, you cannot. [Sammy] It would be REALLY funny if Sammy dropped a projector on someone else’s head. [Sammy] HOW THE TURNTABLES!!!

[GM] ...Can you impale with a rocking horse...???? [Sammy] I don’t want to impale, I want to knock him in the head so he passes out!!! Rest your head, it’s time for bed!!!

[Jack] I don’t think Jack has any plans after this! [Jack] I meant that in the sense that he doesn’t know what he’s doing next, but the way I phrased it, now it just sounds like he’s hitting on Fowler, like, he doesn’t have anything to do after this, are you free? That’s not canon.

[Joey] I don’t know how this will go, [Sammy] Good luck! [Joey] But Joey would like to-- [Sammy] Sammy believes in half of you! [GM] w-which Sammy? wHICH HALF?!

[Jack] I know you said “note.” But my brain at first processed that word as “milk.” [Henry] *laughing* “Did you get my milk, Fowler?” [Jack] He drank the last carton and he didn’t buy more! [Sammy] “I’m going to the store, want me to get anything? *jumps into the lake*”

[GM] Combat Jack! [Jack] *exasperated* He’s not a Combat Boy! Jack is soft and warm, like mashed potatoes!!!

[GM] Norman is wondering to Henry if he oughta be concerned about you all getting what you want out of this. [Henry] .....Maybe.

[monsterrae1]

*tiptoes in* "Everyone is already thinking that we're dating" *scurries out*

Oh love this one, I'll give it my best and hope you like it!

*

"Dispatch to Station 118"

"Go a head dispatch" Eddie smiled a little, hearing Bobby's voice, even if it was over the coms felt familiar in a nice way.

"You're needed as back up on a fire on..." Eddie looked at his screen and repeated the address to them "the 136 is already there commanding the scene"

"Copy that Dispatcher Diaz, we're on our way"

Eddie took a deep breath nodded, it was his first day, he really didn't want to screw up.

"Dispatcher Diaz?" A familiar voice said, Eddie left his smile grow on his face.

"Go ahead Firefighter Buckley"

"Good luck on your first day, you got this"

"Thanks Buck"

-

"Firefighter Buckley, second door to your right, you should find a tool box there, see if you can use anything" Eddie said into the coms, hearing as Buck moved through the house following his instructions.

"Found it, hey Eds, now that you're here, I was thinking we could do the zoo this weekend? To celebrate Chris' report card" Eddie smiled, biting his lip.

"Not really the time Buck"

"Well, you didn't answer my text"

"The zoo sounds great, just remember we need to be at my abuelas for dinner"

"Boys? You can't to this at another time?"

"Sorry Bobby" They both answered and focused back on the emergency at hand.

-

"Evan Buckley I swear to God if you don't answer me right now..." The chair hit the cubicle behind Eddie as he stood up, eyes watching all the monitors and waiting for an update on Buck, who had gone back into an unstable building because he heard something, and now he wasn't answering his radio "Buck, c'mon, what am I gonna tell Chris" He said softly, ignoring the wetness pooling on his eyes.

Another 5 long minutes later, the radio came on, Buck telling them to prepare for transport of an open fracture and several third degree burns, Eddie focused back on his job and dispatched an extra unit for the transport, and taking a deep breath when the line went dead just as the entire time focused on the last victim.

After that call Eddie took 5. He made sure to text Buck to check in that he came out of that building fine himself, and also texting Hen to update him with any information Buck was gonna leave out of his typical "I'm doing fine Eds, just doing my job". He looked at his watch and sighted, 3 more hours until he could go home.

"You know" One of the others dispatchers said walking into the break room with him "We weren't sure why you transferred here, guess now we know"

"What you mean?" Eddie frowned, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Your boyfriend? Firefighter Buckley? We figured they made one of you transfer and you took one for the team"

"Oh" Eddie blushed a little "He's not... we're not..." Married? Together? "It's a little complicated" He finally settled on, they weren't together, but they were sort of raising a kid together, and they weren't married but they were family.

"Shit, sorry"

"No worries"

The rest of the shift went by with less tension, both Hen and Buck assured him that Buck was alright, aside from a few bruises, so he could relax. On his way back to his house he started to think about his conversation on the break room, the implication that everyone thought he and Buck were together, a lot of comments started to make sense.

In the 4 months he'd been at Metro Dispatch Eddie had been invited to a few cookouts and drinks after shifts, when he'd politely declined, he was told he was welcome to bring his family along, and he never gave it much of a thought about how they had pulled Buck in the family box, because that's what he was, but now thinking about it it made more sense for them to think that they were together, instead of just being weirdly attached best friends.

The jeep was parked outside of his house when he finally made it, Chris was probably already sleep, even by the time Buck arrived, but the lights were on in the kitchen and there was a shadow moving through the place, Eddie smiled and took his bag to finally make his way in.

"You know" He said walking into the kitchen, letting his eyes watch Buck and catalogue the visible bruises on his skin "Everyone at dispatch already thinks we're dating" He watched as Buck froze in place, nearly dropping the plates he was taking out of the cupboard

In a moment of bravery, he closed the distance between them, standing right behind Buck and caging his body in between his arms, taking the plates out of his hand and placing them in the counter, when Buck tried to move, Eddie took a step back, in case he wanted to leave, but Buck only turned around to face him, dropping his hands into Eddie's hips.

"Yeah?"

"Hmm" Eddie hummed, closing the space between them again, chest to chest, almost nose to nose "So, why aren't we?"

"You think you're ready for that?"

Eddie took a moment to think about it, he'd been working on a lot of stuff on therapy, one of them being able to accept the things he wanted for himself

"I do, you?"

A huge smile took over Buck's face, in a second moving his hands from Eddie's hips to cup his face gently.

"Just waiting for you eds"

Eddie smiled and finally, closed the space between them with a soft kiss.

[softhxtch]

TITTLE: Just Be Here

SUMMARY: Reader just finished a case and her husband, Aaron Hotchner is always there to support her. 

PAIRING: female! reader x Aaron Hotchner

CHARACTERS: reader, Aaron Hotchner, Emily Prentiss and David Rossi (literally for a second), Allison (OC)

WARNINGS: child assault and abuse; mentions of misscariage, alcohol usage, body fluids (blood, urine, vomit), pornography.

WORD COUNT: 3,5K

A/N: am i back? i don’t know hahah, but it’s something, right? again in this story Jack doesn’t really exist, sorry. and again CAC - Crimes Against Children.

'Hey, sweetie. You're safe, okay? Nobody's gonna hurt you anymore.', you whispered taking little girl into your arms. She was sobbing quietly with tears falling down her pink cheeks. She was no more than three years old, still in her purple pajamas, that were dirty form all the body fluids person can imagine and also dirty room she was held in. 'You're safe, Allison. You're safe.', you kept repeating and little girl just held her hands around you even tighter.

You looked around the room and the whole sight was just horrible. No windows, barely any lights, cages, blood and urine all over the floor. Just an awful place to be in let alone to live for months. Even the smallest thought of what was going on before the whole team came in gave you shivers and blood started to boil inside you. The place was there for years at that point and no one knew about it. You were just looking at your teammates, taking the rest of the kids out of the building. Some were crying, some were screaming and some were just clinging to the agents hoping that they would never comeback. And they never will. You would make sure of that.

' Allison, we have to go.', you said quietly, trying not to scare her. But little girl just shook her head and tightened her arms around your neck. 'We have to go. You need to see a doctor. It's scary, I know, but I'm gonna be with you all the time, okay?'

It wasn't easy to convince Allison to come out of the building, but after some negotiations and conversations with you she agreed. You're holding her in your arms as close as possible, trying to avoid the blue and red lights that were blinding both of you in the dark night.

Hospitals were always the last place that you're wanted to be. If you were the it only meant that either someone from your team or family was injured or one of the victims from your case were in tragic condition.

To put it straight, hospitals were never a good sign.

But you couldn't go home, not just yet. You promised Allison, that you would be with her this whole time, so you were also there when she got a check up from the pediatrician. You were holding her hand, caressing the back of it from time to time just to reassure her that you're there. Sometimes your would just add how great she was doing and how strong it is.

'Home.', Allison whined as doctor was checking on one of her bruised legs. Few tears fell down her cheeks, which made your hear break. It was horrible to seeing anyone in that position, but especially a child.

'You're doing great, Allison. Just few more minutes, okay?', you said quietly, taking hair out of her forehead.

'I just need to check the other leg and then you can have a long nap, till morning. How does that sound?', doctor asked and written down something on her notepad.

'I think it's great! Do you, Sonnie?', you said with a happy voice, looking at a little girl. She just nodded, still pouting from her cry few seconds ago. 'I'll be right back.', you said when you heard familiar phone ring. Doctor nodded understanding, but Allison held your hand not wanting to let you go. ' Allison, I'll be back in few minutes. I just need to answer that call, okay? You will be able to see me through the glass. I'm not going anywhere and until then you'll stay with Doctor Ashley.', you explained.

She wasn't convinced at all. It took you few more minutes for to actually let go of your hand. You explained everything a least three times. Doctor eyed you few times, but you just tried to ignore her. After years of working with children you knew how long it sometimes takes to convince them. Especially the ones that have been seriously hurt. They just wanted someone to be with them through the whole process and you understood it one hundred percent.

You sent Allison a small smile, saying one more time, that you'll be back in few minutes. After that you left the room and took out phone, dialing number that called you before.

'Hi.', you heard deep, yet soft voice on the other side. You sighed and replied with the same thing. 'Long night?'

'Yeah and I can't even see the end of it.', you answered and heard your husband's laugh. 'It wasn't a joke.', you added, rolling your eyes.

'I know. But it's kind of ironic considering that the sun will be up in less than an hour.', Aaron said. You could hear him moving around the house. Walking from bathroom to bedroom, probably getting ready for work. 'How are the kids?'

'Fine, if you could say it after living in a basement for most of your life and posing for creepy middle aged men.', you answered, feeling the shivers on your arms. The images that you saw literally just came back. And you can expect they will be coming back more often, but this time in your nightmares.

'All alive?', Aaron asked. You could hear him doing something in the kitchen, which made you smile, still looking at Allison. You actually would do everything to be right now with him in that kitchen. Waiting for his famous muffins with bacon and eggs, like he would do whenever both of you had day off.

'Yes, all eight of them.', you nodded. 'You're heading to work now? It's a bit early, even for you.'

'Not yet.', he answered quickly. You could hear another chews from the other side, which actually made your stomach going louder. 'But yesterday I picked up from the post office that coffee table, that you ordered and I thought I would put it together.'

'You're gonna put a coffee table together? At-', you asked surprised, looking at the watch on your phone. '-4:38 in the morning? Are you okay?', you added with a laugh.

'What can I say? I'm just bored without you.', he answered. Right after that you heard a loud noise from the other side and a quiet curse from Aaron.

'You're okay?', you asked, furrowing you brows.

'Yes. I'm looking for the box with all the tools.', he replied. 'I think I'll ask Morgan about them. He'll know what I should use.'

'How about you leave it to me, huh? I'll do it, because we don't want another trip to ER. It'll be third time this year, they'll assume that I'm assaulting you.', you laughed, hearing just quick 'hey!' from your husband.

For the first time in hours you actually felt nice. You didn't had constant fear in your head about the case. You weren't even thinking about it, right now what you were thinking about was Aaron and that stupid coffee table. And he knew about it, that was the reason why he called. After you were in a car with Allison and two policemen, you texted him that the case was over and you're headed to the hospital with victims. Both of you always do it, just to reassure each other that the other person is fine. Aaron on top of that would always call you. He's a very light sleeper, even waking up when you stir in bed sometimes, so every vibrations of his phone wakes him up. No matter what the time is on the clock, he always calls you. He knows how much you love your job and how saving kids was your thing. You loved it, after few years in narcotics unit you know you found your place. But Aaron also knew that you get very into the cases and you involve yourself a lot and if the case goes wrong you blame yourself really hard. Especially being a unit chief, just like him. So he always tried to light the mood even just a little and talk about the day, whatever comes to his mind.

'You're staying in the hospital, right?', it almost wasn't a question. It wasn't anything new to be honest. A lot of the times you would comeback to the hospital with the victims and especially with this case. He knew it wouldn't be different. You were working on it for over a month and it was draining you.

'Don't think I have a choice.', you admitted, looking back at Allison who was also starring at you. The doctor stopped examination and was about to leave. 'One of the girls won't let me go.'

'Just be careful, okay? And take care. Don't forget to eat something.', he reminded, knowing the previous situations.

'I will.', you reassured him. 'I love you.'

'I love you too, sweetheart. Give me a call later in a day.', Aaron said and you agreed.

After you said your goodbyes, you put the phone in the pocket and went back to the room. Allison immediately opened her arms and you laughed coming closer.

'You're back!', she said loudly, which made you laugh even more. Doctor Ashley smiled at both of you and left the room.

'I said I will.', you reminded her, patting her head. You could clearly see the tiredness in her eyes and how hard she was trying not to fall asleep. 'I think it's good time for a sleep.', you proposed, but Jade just shook her head immediately, taking back. ' Allison, you need to sleep.'

'Not sleepy.', she answered quietly, putting knees closer to her chest. 'Don't want to sleep.'

'You've been awake for a long time, Sonnie. You need to rest. I do too. Everyone needs to sleep so they will have energy for the next day.', you explained, but she once again shook her head. 'I'll be there the whole time. Nothing's gonna happen to you. You're safe.'

'Seven minutes?', she asked, trying to stop the yaw. You nodded and observed how she put her head on the pillow, drifting away from the real world.

Aaron Hotchner looked at his watch for the tenth time in the last 8 minutes. He signed and went back to signing papers in front him.

It was a slow day. Most paper work days were slow, but this one was even slower. He just couldn't focus. His thoughts were everywhere but in that office. He was thinking about his wife and what she's about to at that moment, probably still at hospital with the little girl. It was literally breaking his heart when he was thinking about your job and side effects, but also about your personal issues.

Being married for almost six years and together over eight, was something he was very proud of. He loved you with his whole heart and couldn't see anyone but you. The whole team always loved to see when a woman would flirt with Aaron, because it was always so funny to see him nicely declining the actions. Aaron Hotchner was a strong man with a very intimidating vibe, his voice could literally break you into a meltdown and get when a woman would approach him his eyes would always look for you. He just couldn't see his world existing without you.

With that being said he also knows you very well. Whenever something was wrong, he could feel it. Just from the look in your eyes or movement. You almost didn't have to talk to have a conversation. He understood you without any words and so did you.

After long nights when there were only you two together, Aaron knew what you wanted. Be knew all your dreams and wishes. Where you would like to go for vacations or favourite cuisine. Things that he could control. He also knew about your dream job and family wishes. Things he couldn't control and everytime Aaron would think about this, his heart would break into thousand pieces. Because if he could he would give you everything that you wanted and to do that he would sacrifice anything he could.

Quiet sound of a clock, that was announcing noon, got Aaron out of his thoughts. He looked at the clock just to assure himself of the hour and pressed his lips into thin line. Then he just closed the files on the rest, took coat and walked out of the room. Aaron walked to his friend's office and knocked on the door. He opened them after quick 'come in'.

'Dave, I'm gonna be back in an hour.', Aaron said, looking at the older man working on his papers. He looked up with pen still between his fingers.

'Everything's okay?', Dave asked and got quick nod from Aaron. 'Y/N's at the hospital again?'

'Yeah, they finished the case few hours ago so I'm sure she hasn't ate anything since.', he explained. 'I'm just gonna bring her food and come back.'

'No problem. If anything happens, we'll call you.', David said, waving younger man off. Aaron just laughed and closed the door. Then he walked down the stairs, wanting to leave the office.

'Hey, Hotch! Are you going again to get some food?', Emily's voice stopped him from going further. He turned around to face not only her, but three other agents. 'You're going outside, right?'

'Yes, Emily.', he sighed. 'But I'm not going to the place you love to eat from.'

'I figured. But maybe you would want to do us a favor and go there? Since you're already going outside the office.', she explained and Derek started to come closer with JJ right behind him. 'Look, it's raining outside and it's pointless to have two wet agents in the office. We will pay for the gas and also your food, huh?'

'Just text me your order and I'll see what I can do.', Aaron said, rolling his eyes slightly. Then he turned around and started walking towards the elevators, still hearing voices of agents behind him, who were deciding on the order.

Pediatric floor of the hospital was as always busy. Kids running around, parents trying to keep up with them, crying children from everywhere you can imagine and on top of that walls with so many colours, that he thought that someone vomited on them. He had no problem of finding the room where you were. Of course with a help from nurses.

Aaron slowly opened the door from the hospital room. He was expecting for either you or the child to be asleep and he didn't want to wake anybody up. But the sight inside made just his heart to melt.

You were sitting on the couch with Allison sleeping in your arms. Her head was on your chest and arms were really tight around the back. Her moth were slightly open, just like yours. But you also had your head hung back and he was sure he'd hear your complaints about the neck pains for the next week.

Aaron slowly put the package with your favourite food and something tasty for children on the small table near the door. Then he took the blanket from the bed and put it over you and the little girl, knowing how cold you must be from laying down in one place for so long. After that he just put a light kiss on your forehead and with one last look he left the room.

Aaron got to the elevator and took out his phone, checking out one message from Emily.

If you are going to the place near the hospital and there's a girl with short red hair, then say that you would like to order for Agent Prentiss 😘

He furrowed his brows at the message and dialed her right away.

'Did I say something wrong?', she answered after one signal.

'How this girl supposed to know your order?', he asked, looking at the numbers of elevator going down.

'She'll know, trust me. I've been there many time.', Emily laughed and Aaron could practically see her smile through the phone.

'Whatever.', he sighed, hearing the ding from the elevator. 'Oh and Prentiss?', Aaron called and heard quick 'yeah' from the other side. 'Stop sending me emojis. It's highly unprofessional to do it to your boss and it's making me uncomfortable.', he ended, walking out of the hospital.

You could physically feel lighter closing the door to you home. Everything related to work you always tried to leave outside this house and treat this place like an escape. And it was a long few weeks, so you were nothing but happy and relieved that it's over.

The house was quiet and dark. You could only see dim light from the living room and just thinking about it made you smile. You took off your jacked and boots, leaving the bag at the usual place and started walking towards the light. As you saw Aaron sitting on the couch with his eyes closed, you smiled even wider. His feet were on the coffee table and he had a glass of whiskey in his hand.

You leaned on the door frame and with arms crossed on the chest, you observed him.

'I'm awake.', Aaron said with raspy voice. You knew that he was probably sitting here for a while already.

'I know.', you answered and started walking towards the cabinet with alcohols. 'Aaron Hotchner is at home before me. What's happening in this world? Did they closed the FBI building?', you joked while pouring wine into a glass and sitting next to him.

'Very funny.', he answered with a sarcasm. He put arms around your shoulders and kissed your temple.

'I actually am.', you said, taking a sip. 'But I'm glad you're here.'

'Anytime.', he hummed, placing one more kiss on your head.

'Except the time you're working.', you joked and he just rolled his eyes. 'Thank you for the dinner, by the way. Although I would get something to eat myself, you know?'

'Yeah, you would probably eat your first meal of the day right now. I know you, Y/N.', he said, caressing your arm. 'So, how's the girl?'

'Allison?', you asked, reminding yourself of her beautiful smile in your head. Aaron only nodded, taking a sip from his glass, telling you to continue. 'She's gonna be okay, I hope. But she went through a lot.'

'You got close to her.'

'Yeah.', you admitted. 'I know what you think, Aaron. I know that it's not a good thing, I Get close to those kids and then I come home and they're not there. I know how this looks like. But I swear I just want to help them.'

'I know. But also you need to realize, that when they'll go to foster care they won't have someone to look after them every minute they're there. That there's gonna be many more kids their age and the attention you're giving them right now won't be given to them anymore.', he finished, looking down at you.

'Maybe they don't have to go to foster care.', you whispered, hugging your husband closer.

'You want to adopt a child?', Aaron asked slowly getting to the conclusion and realizing something else. 'You wanna adopt Allison.'

'I do.', you admitted. 'But I won't do it.', you added, sitting straight. Aaron just gave you questioning look. 'They found her mother in Portland, she'll come and get her tomorrow. Ignoring the fact that she doesn't have any job, is living in a two bedroom apartment with four other roommates and all the money goes to the alcohol. Yeah, so Allison has a bright future ahead of her.'

'You never know.', he answered. You put head on his chest once again and laid there for few minutes in silence, trying to relax.

'So, you actually put that table together.', you said keeping the eyes in small brown table in front of you, with Aaron's feet on top.

'I thought you'll never notice.', he answered almost sounding hurt.

'Oh, I did. Just wanted to hold the suspension for a little while.', you smiled and kissed him on the lips. 'Derek did it, am I right?', you whispered, narrowing your eyes.

'No.', he answered simply.

'Liar.', you whispered again, kissing him one more time, but stopping after you hear his phone going off. 'Everything's okay?', you asked.

'Yeah, just Emily.' he answered, but started explaining seing your confused face. 'I gave Emily's number to one of the girls that she has crush on from the restaurant. And I guess she had a good evening.', he ended and showed you the text.

SSA aaron 'Hotch' Hotchner, you are truly THE  man 🥰🤭💗🍑