#IM BACK TO BE SILLY AND TORTURE MY ANONS

[j3st3rfun3r4l]

Hello Tumblr dot com I'm back after fighting w myself to remember which one of my 4 gmails I had connected w this acc bc I have a new phone since a few weeks ago and obviously had to reinstall everything

[diagonal-queen]

HELLO!! i keep requesting them sotty im obsessed but what about hunting dogs with a s/o who has a child😅😅i got silly again

Hunting Dogs with your child

♡ pairing: Fukuchi Ouchi, Jouno Saigiku, Tecchou Suehiro, Teruko Okura (platonic), Tachihara Michizou x gn!Reader

♡ synopsis: How do these goofballs fare as stepdads? (or, in Teruko's case, fun auntie?)

♡ cw: Swearing, unofficial stepfathering, unrealistically good stepfathering, reader's ex situation is not established but it's assumed that their baby momma/daddy is not in the picture (Tachihara), mentions of violence

note: I just haven't written anything in ages, and for that I apologise. Wow, being in university is time consuming! I've had block for months and it's been an absolute pain in the arse but I'm back babey! Keep your requests coming anon- I am the Hunting Dogs whisperer and I will write them till I die. Apologies for errors and I hope you enjoy x

Fukuchi:

My dude is so so so enthusiastic. You mean to tell him that he gets a beautiful loving partner AND a new little guy to hang out with?? Sign him tf up

This man buys your kid so many presents it's genuinely concerning. Your child is spoilt to hell and back by Fukuchi. You need to discourage him from this behaviour STAT

He constantly uses dad words like 'buddy' and 'pal' and 'kiddo' to refer to your kid and they eventually start responding to these nicknames lol

He would totally also do dad stances and just embrace the fatherly aura that is slowly overtaking him day by day (bro starts falling asleep on the couch while the game's on at 9pm)

He's actually surprisingly gentle with your child. If they cry he'll pick them up and comfort them very well. He's like a whole different person when your kid is scared or sad- it's the cutest thing ever

If your child ever gets him a Fathers' Day present he'll probably cry like old man tears of joy. In fact if your child ever does anything nice for him he'll be incredibly touched. Kinda reminds him what he's doing his job for :')

Tells your child great exaggerated (CHILD FRIENDLY) stories about his heroic achievements as a soldier before bed. It's genuinely super cute you guys

If the kid ever runs up to him in excitement when he arrives home in the evening he returns the energy and is like 'omg there they are! that's my kiddo! how have you been??' and picks them up and AUGH they're so cute

Just....🥺🥺

Jouno:

Your child is probably scared of him at first. Within their first meeting he probably makes them cry.

Sorry y'all 😭 but he doesn't exactly come off as much of a teddy bear...and nor does he really act like one with anyone else other than you in private

Jouno just isn't good with kids. Not in the sense that he's scared of them but that he doesn't really know how to interact with them without being intimidating or otherwise just detached

But he really loves you, and he wants to be a good parental figure to your kid, so he tries to warm them up to him by getting them a gift. That probably helps- he might not know much about kids but he's right to assume that they fucking love receiving gifts

Whatever your child's hobbies/interests are, Jouno genuinely does try to connect with them over it, and after a while it does work.

Soon enough your child and Jouno are inseparable and your child is spewing sadistic military rhetoric and oh dear god you've made a terrible mistake introducing the two of them

Yeah, Jouno probably teaches your kid all KINDS of horrible things. He will tell your child stories about times he's tortured suspects, or slaughtered gangs, and just stuff that is not family friendly. You have to nip that behaviour in the bud or else...

He's generally pretty good at taking care of your child, but like, if your kid cried because they were scared there was a monster under the bed, Jouno would probably be like "Yeah. There is. Good luck." and then turn off the lights and leave 💀

Just give him time. He'll learn how to be an emotionally available parent at SOME point

Tecchou:

He's not the step dad. He's the dad that stepped up

Tecchou is definitely very aloof and awkward around your child- like, he knows how to interact with you, but children are different. Children are frightening. And they are his biggest fear maybe

In spite of this, he is fiercely protective of your kid. He will make sure that child is as safe and calm as possible at all times, and he certainly prefers to show that he cares through actions rather than words.

He usually wouldn't initiate physical contact with your child but if they hugged him he would hug back, if they gave him a hi-five he would do it back, etc etc. he will never let your kid down

If your child likes make belief, you can bet you'd walk into a room and find your kid all dressed up, off their rocker in full theatre mode, while Tecchou is sitting on the floor, also dressed up, but looking more depressed than ever before

Save him from your baby. They are taking YEARS off his life

He probably accidentally sends your kid to hospital at some point because he cooked for them. Damnit Tecchou, how don't you realise that a child's stomach wouldn't be able to handle a combination of chocolate and beef

It's okay though, he does learn from this. Plus, he takes care of your child and buys them presents and hangs out with them until they're better <3

He might not join your child in the ball pit, but he would watch them swim around in there with the softest, faintest, most affectionate smile on his face. And that is all that matters folks

Teruko (platonic):

The funnest, meanest, coolest auntie ever

Teruko will lead your child down a dreadful path. Limit their visits to holidays and birthdays for your own sake and the sake of your young one

She's really more than happy to negatively influence look after your child if you need her to though, and they love her because she's super chill and lets them get away with all kinds of things (that aren't violent crimes against humanity)

Your parent says one cookie after dinner? Screw it, have six. I won't tell if you won't. - Teruko, probably

She uses her ability to entertain your kid sometimes- usually she'll decrease her age so she can join them in things like building pillow forts and playing on jungle gyms

I'm just picturing them playing at the park and some concerned parent coming up to them asking where their guardian is and Teruko just fucking transforms into a grown woman on the spot and goes 'WHO'S ASKING' 😭

Teruko is a super cool fun aunt. But she is very wise, and she really will give your kid good life advice on occasion.

She'll also cheer them up when they're feeling down, and if they're feeling scared she helps them step out of their comfort zones and confront their fears (in a safe way!!)

If your kid is like, getting picked on at school or something, Teruko will nag you to phone their school about it. If you don't, she does. If they don't do anything about it, she does. Bottom line is NOBODY fucks with your kid when Teruko is around

I guess technically she really is scary dog privilege lmao

Tachihara:

Help he's so nervous at first? Tachihara this is a child, not a wise sage- you can be normal around them

He just wants to make a good impression on the child okay he's doing his best

But (obviously) your kid immediately loves him, and thinks he's the coolest guy ever, and wants to hang out with him all the time

Tachihara has a bit of a concern that the kid will think that he's trying to replace their other parent, which is fair, but it's unfounded because your child absolutely adores him and does not care about that at all

If your child ever calls him 'Dad' watch his soul fucking transcend to a new plane, he's so surprised and honoured that this beautiful person's child would consider him their parent

Your kid has Tachihara wrapped around their tiny finger. He will oblige them with anything- if you've got a toddler who likes uppies and piggybacks, say your prayers for Tachihara's upper arm and back muscles because he will carry them for hours

You really need him to stop leaving weaponry around the house, though- the absolute HEART ATTACK you had when you saw your precious baby carrying around an unloaded pistol

Also, Tachihara, babe, STOP SWEARING SO MUCH AROUND THE BABY. I CAN'T HAVE MY KID SAYING 'FUCK' TO STRANGERS - you, probably

Doesn't really ever talk about his job(s) with your kid, all they know is that he 'kills bad guys', and they think that's cool as fuck

He's not perfect, sure. But he is trying so hard to be The Perfect Parent™ and, more importantly, he loves your child to bits

taglist~ ♡ @gettinshiggywithit, @fyodorhatr, @flower-of-darkness, @bejeweledgirl, @kokoenjiandco, @pinkiipeachiikeen

of course, thank you to anon for this req!

[reorientation]

hey there. idk if you remember me but im the lesbian virgin anon

its been a while, hope youre doing well. im still a useless silly little virgin who is clinging to my lesbianism by a thread because i can only get off to the daydream of a man fucking me

i literally cant fantasise about being with a woman. the only thing that gets me wet and aching fast is thinking about a man forcing himself on me, either fast and hard or manipulative and slow, it doesnt matter.

in my mind he's always bigger, strong, and just appears out of nowhere, grabs me, bends me over whatever the nearest surface is wherever i am (public or not) and just fucks me like he owns me, and as he does he makes me keep repeating that im a lesbian to everything he says......

fuck.... im sorry i just.. rediscovered your blog again after a while and have spent the last few minuets getting hot and bothered while scrolling through, but rn im not in a place where i can get off so I'll just torture myself like this until i can 🥰

Of course I remember you, sweetheart! (Previously.) I was just wondering where you'd gotten to, in fact. (As opposed to what you'd gotten off to; I had quite a good idea of that.) I'm so pleased that you've come back - and that you weren't able to come as you returned to my words, so that you just had to be wet and desperate. ❤️

Have I told you how much I love that I've ruined you like this? That the very first thing you told me is that "im a lesbian 100%", and now you can't come without thinking about a man raping you? That's my touch on you, sweetness. Even if I never get to bend you over and use you myself, I've left my mark on your pussy.

There's even a little of me in your fantasy rapist - we both have you keep calling yourself a lesbian while that slips away from you with every moment and every word.

[ilikekidsshows]

About you being harassed by Marinette fans. I don't know if me doing this is weird, but you being open bout that makes me want to open up more too. I've send you 4 anons by now (u probably could already tell they were from one person) because I don't have a miraculous Blog anymore since the hiatus before Destruction because Marinette fans found one of my posts criticizing Marinette's treatment of Cat Noir and her leadership and they went after me for i think almost an entire week. I ended up deleting my blog in panic and fear of it getting worse the more traffic it got amongst Mari stans.

I followed the show and Fandom til now from afar to see if any of my Marinette problems were getting the fixes everyone screamed about season 5 would deliver but I can't say that happened. I wholeheartedly agree that with alot of other people that it only got worse with the doubling down and her gettin less heroic underneath the surface.

So I'm still here and upset that I was bullied out of this fandom for things I was apparently right about to degrees I didn't even knew back then how right I'd end up being....

I found a couple of blogs to follow that share my opinions and you guys have been interwoven alot now so I thought sending anons to dip my toe back into being part of the discourse is a good idea. I hope I didn't cause any Mari stans getting angry at you for it, I've been worried bout that ngl.

I would like to ask bout one of the topics Marinette fans cyberbullied me for but I still think I'm right for questioning:

How much value does Marinette see in being friends with her love interests?

Oc im not doubting that she sees at least some worth in it, but it feels very shallow. Fandom is working the lion's share to take what little canon gives and run with it til they think their fanon is real.

Marinette values friendship, sure, but Zoe is the only love interest of hers for whom that feels right to say

Marinette in Canon has said many times that for her being friends with the one she loves is the worst thing she could possibly imagine. E. g. Psycomedian. And she was rewarded with Adrien being her devoted and desperate prince for her doing probably the most friendship related thing she did in all season 4. She had a basic little convo with him about understanding to have problems and that's where it ended. Where did Marinette ever even try to be rlly Adrien's friend? She said 500x that she's finally gonna put her romance feelings aside for a bit to focus on her job (which I hoped would mean she'd work on her weaknesses in the platonic Ladynoir team dynamic too... Silly me... )

But that never goes anywhere? Weren't Adrien and Kagami the ones literally having been created out of the feeling love or to love someone in particular and even THEY could overwrite their senti programming better than Marinette ever could get over her normal ass feelings for a week? Adrien and Kagami value the friendship with the one they love deeply, is that the difference? That Marinette can't ever move one from loving someone because friendship feels like an awful downgrade and torture to her so she stays the same? What does that say bout her?

Or that Luka and Cat Noir never caused her stalker paranoia to break out that Derision claims she does to protect herself. Why does it only apply to Adrien? And not even Cat Noir, too? In my other anons I brought up how awful I think it is that Marinette seemingly has no interest in leaning anything rlly about the boy underneath Cat Noir's mask, now she barely acts like she remembers that he's real and that they'll one day reveal where he'll then find out how many times she deliberately deceived him with her civilian identity in very hurtful ways.

How does that correspond to her being in love and more important for my question, what does that level of refusal to treat someone like a real person say about her willingness to be Cat's friend? Cause I can't see friendship in Ladynoir anymore. Marinette was the one who killed that in season 4 and then season 5 didn't improve her in much. Friends don't treat each other the way Marinette so easily uses, hurts ignores, silences and deceives Cat Noir without batting an eye.

The only effort she really made was before Kwamis choice. When she thought he was still in love with her and expected that s4 magically caused no damage to his feelings for her. she seemingly thought she could just allow him to dedicate himself to her for an overall easy way to sweep everything under the rug and make him "happy" again without her ever having to really try and do better herself because that was the comfort she was seeking at that time (shoutout to Familyagrestefanblog and erisluna35. I've been paraphrasing them alot and wanted mention that too. Didn't get to write out my own opinion in a while and I agree with them x})

This refusal to face her hurtful actions of s4 quickly developed into her craving for him to give her his easy love and not wanting to take anything less than precisely the endless devotion she wanted from him now. No matter what the price. No matter how much it put him too in danger (what even meant Cat Blanc?), and yet, still no interest in him as a person.

Once she had to take the no, she left and then she never again made a genuine effort in Ladynoir. Any effort to better herself was romance related. Determination may have been the episode where she rlly noticed her changed feelings for him, but she did try earlier than that. But it fully stopped with his no as did her changed feelings vanish as quickly as they showed up. So what does that say about her and how she views their "friendship"?

Season 4 has her already show that she doesn't want Ladynoir to be an actual friendship since she treats him barely better than a magical pet she rarely ever thinks about, which caught her off guard over and over that she isn't being the kindest and adoring person of all time to him. She treats him so much worse than her actual friends and in s5 she isn't trying to build a real connection beyond wanting him to shower her in his devotion and love.

What season 5 shows bout Marinette's view of the Ladynoir friendship is in my most generous reading her not getting to hide behind any romantic feelings from either side that she doesn't know how to be his friend, after she had to learn in season 4 that she was a really really bad one. But even with that generous reading, it would still mean that Marinette then went on prioritizing not having to feel any further discomfort or having to owe up for her actual mistakes in their bond over her finally being the friend she SHOULD think Cat Noir deserves. A friend he desperately needed but never got cause she called it a day with her personal needs being met my having her best friend Alya with her.

Friends don't do that. Marinette denied him any genuine friendship he obviously truly needed as Cat Noir because she personally didn't need it from him anymore cause of Alya. And he rejected her desire to now be adored by him so there was no purpose left anymore for him to fulfill in her life besides the easy partner she made clear cant ask shit from her.

That is so unbelievably selfish... How on earth is that supposed to be FRIENDSHIP?

Srry, for this being long. Last point.

Luka of course needs to be mentioned too. Sure, the show says they are friends. But are they really? Their friendship is built on him being her platonic therapist back-up boyfriend who doesn't ask shit of her either. This is still the same pattern as with Catrien. Luka does all the emotional labor and Marinette just takes and takes and that's what makes her so comfortable around him but she isn't interested in him either beyond what she sees day to day in front of her.

That doesn't count as friendship in my book. For Adrigami you can still feel their friendship after their breakup. But Lukanette is Luka being a platonic therapist boyfriend and Marinette being just as disinterested in him as with Cat Noir while being just as comfortable getting showered in emotional labor that she's unwilling to work on giving back the way she should.

How is that friendship? What value has friendship for Marinette once any romantic feelings are involved from either side and it isn't Zoé (feels like a homophobic backhanded compliment lmao)

That was very long, I apologize. But thanks to writing in anon I started becoming more comfortable with the idea of joining the Fandom discourse again. I've got alot I wanna say after all that time in silence but I'm not sure yet if I should put myself out there again with a blog. With how season 5 ended Marinette stans are gonna be vicious beasts to any criticism they come across and I don't want that to happen again :(

---

I hope this isn't a case of speak of the devil and he shall appear but lately things have been really quiet on the Marinette stan front. The worst I’ve gotten was this really unhinged one, but they were so unpleasant they didn't have any friends so the harassment was very one-note and stopped pretty quickly since they had to run it alone. It could be that now that season 5 confirmed that season 4 wasn't an outlier, that the show’s writing has gotten incredibly sloppy and nasty, the critical side of the fandom has become unified and we add to each other’s posts and kind of back each other up. It's harder for Marinette stans to target us one by one, and their preferred tactic is dogpiling a single blog. A lot of the Marinette stans protesting my posts now shut up right quick when they see more people agreeing with me adding to the reblog chain.

As for the question, I agree with your assessment. It really does appear that Marinette hates the idea of being friends with a love interest. She whined about Adrien seeing her as just a friend all the way back in Riposte. Adrien sung her praises to Kagami, while she spied on them, and she had the gall to whine that the boy she “loves” thinks so highly of her because it wasn't the kind of thinking she wanted.

There was this one thing I said in a previous post that I think is accurate: Marinette part-times being Cat Noir's friend. Even the part of time she acts as his friend, she ignores his feelings, insults him, pushes him away, refuses to give him emotional support in any way and lies to him about anything she possibly can. She only approaches him as Marinette when she wants to complain about Adrien not coming to the date he didn't know was a date, when she thinks she can score a date with him or so that she can practice confessing to Adrien on him. Marinette's “friendship” with Cat Noir is all take with no give when she isn't outright ignoring his existence.

She also ignores boys who have feelings for her in her civilian life. Nathaniel is very suspicious of her in Reverser, having to be convinced that she wasn't planning to humiliate him, implying he isn't part of her friend group since he doesn't know her well enough to know she only humiliates people when they're in her way of getting at Adrien. (Alix makes it sound like she wouldn't do that period, but we know the truth by now.) She also refused to come to Juleka and Luka's shared birthday party if Luka was present after they broke up. I bet if you tried to tell Marinette, or her writers, that your romantic partner should also be your best friend to make a healthy relationship, they just wouldn't compute. 

I don't want to say Marinette doesn't hold friendship in high regard period, because the amount of exceptions she makes for Alya shows that she at least values Alya’s friendship. I think she just doesn't value friendship with boys. I feel like Marinette is the kind of person who doesn't think boys and girls can really be friends, which would explain why she thinks Adrien considering her a friend is worse than anything else. If boys can't really be friends with girls, Adrien using the word “friends” means they aren't even that.

Consider this: how often does Marinette hang out with her guy classmates when it isn't 1) a whole-class outing or 2) more likely that Marinette just wanted to hang out with his girlfriend? Like, in Animan, Marinette had no idea Nino had a crush on her, but she still acted like an outing with him at the zoo was the worst thing ever. I get that she was disappointed Adrien wasn't there, but Nino is one of Marinette’s oldest classmates, yet she doesn't want to spend time with him, unless she's planning to use him to get closer to Adrien, since he's Adrien’s best friend.

Of course, she doesn't really value the time with her other friends for its own sake outside of Alya either. It seems like the only times they hang out together is to plot or participate in her get Adrien quick schemes. The only times the girls do something not Marinette related is when Marinette hasn't called them together, like when they were going to the pool in Gorizilla, something Marinette completely forgot until Alya called her. Marinette has poor memory but, despite her knowing she has poor memory, she apparently gave herself no reminder to hang out with her friends. You bet I write down every occasion I’ve agreed to see my friends specifically because I have bad memory as well.

It seems like, unless you're Alya, Marinette only cares about you for how able and willing you are to help her catch Adrien's attention. I keep saying Marinette treats her Adrien romancing problems as the most important thing going on at any given moment, and it's true for all areas of her life. Maybe that's the reason we didn't see Socqueline for four seasons despite her supposedly being such an important friend to Marinette, and why she never joined the friend group proper; Socqueline couldn't help her get with Adrien so she wasn't worth Marinette’s time.

This is a yet another thing where Miraculous is actually pretty sexist; girls and boys can't ever just be friends and girls care more about getting guys than they do about their friends. Another thing of course is this idea that boys just don't have as in-depth feelings as girls or should bury their feelings and never ask for emotional support, which is why all of Marinette's love interests are her emotional support dispensers whose opinions on anything don’t matter when their job is to simply mindlessly worship Marinette while their feelings are devalued by the narrative every time they dare to try to ask Marinette for some support back. Luka gets Akumatized which convinces him to break up with Marinette when he had emotional needs she wasn't willing to fulfill. Meanwhile Adrien goes through the travesty that is Kuro Neko

“Power of love always so strong” but only when it's Marinette's toxic idea of love and when it isn't platonic love. Unless you're Alya, I guess.

[matenrou-fan]

im gonna hold myself back and only request 2 things,,,but like actually getting caught with a fem s/o during sex by their teams with jyushi, sasara, and gentaro ueueueue -rei boobie anon

Jyushi, Sasara and Gentaro getting caught with a fem! s/o during sex

Today there is a whole parade of NSFW requests in my askbox💀

femreader, teasing, oral (receiving +giving), skull-fucking, rough sex, mention of crempie, semi public sex;;

NSFW UNDER THE CUT

;MINORS DNI;

-Nah because this man would be ashamed for his whole life.

-Such sensitive crybaby, he's really attentive to any small sounds usually, but when he gets into his 'dark' mode AND also gets a little naughty with you at the same time, Jyushi doesn't hear anything. Cause now, lady of the night, he's ready to open the depth of his bosom and show you how easily his sinful dirty demons would make you lose your pure mind.. (That's a direct quote from him.)

-Ok but poor boy will forget all his funky pompous words pretty quick when your games with him get too wild, and there's just emptiness in his head with only one thought about finally cum, cum inside your clenching pussy that makes his legs weak from its tightness.

-And despite the fact that he prefers to do such things in his bedroom, sometimes when you visit him in his dressing room after a concert, he's taking you right here, too excited and full of emotions after a successful performance.

-And oops.. One time Jushi forgot he also invited Kuko to his concert too, or maybe he was ignoring this fact, being sure a vulgar monk would not ever try to get here. But not today, and Kuko is already in the corridor backstage, opening the door just to see how his teammate fuck you almost like a rabbit in heat..

-All of you three freeze for a moment before Kuko swore loudly and slammed the door, trying to forget what he just saw. Never in his life would he have thought this softie can do things like this! Hell, maybe he's tripping?

-You try to catch your breath, slowly realizing what just happened, but the feeling of Jyushi's dick twitching inside you more than usual didn't let you concentrate on anything else.

"Forget about this, my sinful princess… Mm, this tickling situation is just making us.." - he mumbled, really trying to come up with at least something in his mind but ended up whining on your shoulder. - "Just let's continue, s/o, I want to cum so bad.."

-Not really a fan of such things so after he gets in his casual mode would probably cry for the whole day and night, too ashamed to look both in your and Kuko's eyes. Probably would go to his temple just to sincerely apologize and start crying again…

-Yet if you tease your boyfriend a little about this situation, asking if he's closed the door properly this time, he would get aroused more quickly, letting you have control and just being a soft bottom.

-Ahh such a two faced man, actually!!

-Like yeah, always so goofy and everything, it sometimes looks like have zero thoughts in his mind, especially a naughty one. Yet when actually this man loves to get wild and you know this better than everyone else.

-It's actually even hard to say where you're doing this more often - in his house or in his dressing room. Starting with this shit about how your cute smile always cheers him up before the performance and ending with a flirt like: I'm so jealous of your heart right now, because it's pounding inside of you and I'm not…

-So helping your boyfriend to relax with his cock deep in your pussy is one of your favorite things to do. You both quickly get too carried away and absolutely not thinking about where you are and what risk you have.

-And ahh, poor silly Sasara, he absolutely forgot that today after his show DotsuHon will visit him for some important conversation!! Well, but can you really blame him when he pressed his face between your thighs like this, almost torturing you with long and slow thrusts of his tongue..?

-Not even trying to control your voice, you didn't even realize how loud you can be but when your blurry eyes shifted to the opening door, a wild smirk on Rei's face tells you everything.

-Where's Rosho? Well, of course he also was hearing you both so prefer to stay outside, when Rei is just peeking to tease you both and enjoy your shocked faces before closing the door back with a small 'Oopsie.'

-Too ashamed now, you tried to cross your legs and stop your boyfriend, yet he just grasped your hips, speeding up.

"What's wrong? Didn't know how loud you were..?" - Sasara chuckle, tickling your folds with hot breath. When he stops joking and talks with you like that, it always is so.. exciting.. - "I fucking hate how this old fart look at your sometimes.. So let him know you're only mine.."

-Ok but Rei would probably tease him about this, telling that he thought his teammate's favorite drink is a cream soda, not your pussy. And despite Sasara acting all flustered and giggling awkwardly, he does feel some pride arising in his chest. Mm, maybe next time you two should be caught up when you do something more interesting..?

-He doesn't want to make you uncomfortable, but if you would let everyone (well or at least Rei) see your cumming face, when you only can call your boyfriend's name and sob uncontrollably, then it would be just great..

-Well, Dice already caught Ramuda once with his onesan, so it's now Gentaro's turn, huh?

-Despite your boyfriend always acting all mysterious and incomprehensible, like he's the only one who notices all the details and can fool people around him, sometimes even he can get too carried away.

-Losing all his attention to the real world as your body is the only thing he sees now, as he just keeps groaning how good it feels to be inside you, while pounding you into the wall with a fast thrust.

-So for the first time it was just an accident, when Dice almost broke into his teammate's house, screaming about winning a small amount of money from bets and casinos. Oh, how bad that exactly at this moment you were on your knees in front of your boyfriend with his cock deep in your mouth as he was almost skull-fucking you.

-Okay, this time Dice got everything much quicker than in the same situation with Ramuda, stormed out back on his street with even more red face than you both have.

-Will Gentaro stop? No, he still wants to cum, and the way the hot walls of your throat clench around him just makes him tease you about this situation a little.

"Mm, I'm glad you didn't even try to pull away when you noticed him.." - your boyfriend coo, patting your head in some pitiful manner, and you clearly can hear mockery in his tone. - "You didn't mind showing him how good you can make me feel, do you?"

-But why did I say 'for the first time'..? Cause there surely would be another accident like this, but now Gentaro would leave the door of his bedroom open on purpose, playing with you knowing damn well his teammates would be here soon. It's like a new game for him - if he was capable of seducing you till the time they would be here? In which exact pose they would have caught you both?

-After you get caught for the first time, he suddenly feels some new kind of amusement in his chest, and wants to experience it again. To see your surprised face again, as you cling to him closer in a weak attempt to cover your body. Oh, just how delightful this sense of power you give him in such moments.. Gentaro probably can get a little bit addicted.

-Of course would try to tease you in Ramuda's workplace too, stroking your thighs more firmly than usual or place quick playful kisses on your neck when these two didn't see it. Well, he can't just start fucking you right here, but at least your boyfriend will make sure to bring you to the point where you would try to drag him back home for some private time.

-Or maybe he would even be capable of pushing you to try something new and get a little naughty in the darkness of a dead-end alley..?

[aettuddae]

first of all welcome back queen 💪💯💯

let me tell u i SCREAMED when i saw the cowboy carter cameo WOOOOOO (did u listen to the album, thoughts?) karina is such a troll for that pic with ning 😭😭

yes kai is the enemy, but he also is giving me himbo vibes but specially kelso from that 70s show and i love kelso so idk

sehun defense club 🫡🫡 he just a happy silly jolly fella 😕, seulgi & jiwon being so clueless is hilarious, my fav comedy duo

the new chapters taking a serious turn threw me off a bit ngl but they were soooo good like the ominous vibes the mocking birds have its great also lets NOT torture a little girl HELLO (EUNCHAE GET BEHIND ME)

also daein ur sleeping on the couch tonight for being an ass to karina (speaking off she literally got me kicking my feet back n forth 🫦🫦i love when girls tease ppl)

theres literally so much more too speak on BUT im dragging on so…what a great way to return, glad u got a life now 🫶🫶 sounds fun

im back to writing mini essays in ur ask WE ARE SO BACK

- 🕷️

well, hello once again 😌👋🏻

about cowboy carter.. i did listen to a few songs, but i'm sorry, it's not really my place 😭

kai as kelso is crazy, but kinda accurate honestly. never would have pictured it like that. meanwhile, daein's friends are a whole plot of their own and i'm glad someone cares about them 😭🩷

i'm happy you enjoyed the new chapters, i was quite hesitant about people liking them since there's a lot of drama ma ma ma ma, especially with the mockingbirds. hope it wasn't heavy to read.

you're self-destructive 😭 but that's fine cause i am a little too

thank you, anon. having a life is interesting, but i have much more fun writing my silly little aespa smaus. glad to read your asks again, it's one of my favorite parts of writing 😅🤍

[loveydoveylex]

[please imagine im holding a microphone like this is a street interview bHFFG] lex what do you have to say about your pirate boyfriends :D

HI TOBY!!! ANON!!!! OK OK OK OK OH MY GOD. JUST IN GENERAL. My Fuckifm Pirate Boyfriends. I Love Them So Much? THEY'RE SO FUNNY AND GOOFY AND I'VEEBEEN THINKING ABOUT THEM ALL DAY ANDNFNnns RUSTY PETE AND PIERRE LE FER MY ABSOLUTE FUCKING BELOVEDS. this is gonna show up in their character tags but idc i am forcing people to see how much i love and appreciate them (also no one checks their tags but me anyway). LOOK!!!!!!!!!! pete...

HE IS SO SILLY. HE IS SO GOOFY. (HE IS ABOUT TO COMMIT MURDER) i cannot even count the amount of times i have replayed tools of destruction + quest for booty purely for him HAHAHAHA I'M PROBABLY THE ONLY SOUL ON THE PLANET THIS OBSESSED WITH HIM BUT I LOVE HIM SO MUCH⁉️

LOOK AT HIM. PERCEIVE HIM ABOUT TO UNLEASH A CURSE AND BRING LEGIONS UPON LEGIONS OF TORTURED SOULS AWAITING THEIR CHANCE FOR REVENGE BACK TO LIFE ALL BECAUSE HE WANTS HIS DEAD CAPTAIN BACK. WHAT A FUNNY GUY!

and PIERRE. PIERRE. PIERRE. OH PIERRE.

THIS GUY. THIS STUPID FUCKING GUY. he's just an alternate dimension counterpart of pete they say. He Is Just Him But Blue They Say. NO. I COULD HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH HIM JUST BECAUSE HE'S ANOTHER VERSION OF RUSTY PETE, SURE. BUT I DID NOT. I FELL IN LOVE WITH THIS ASSHOLE BECAUSE OF HOW PATHETIC HE IS. HE MAKES HIMSELF OUT TO BE SUCH A HOTSHOT BUT HE'S A FUCKING LOSER. HE JUST SUCKS SO FUCKING BAD. THIS STUPID FRENCH ASSHOLE HAS CURSED ME AND STOLEN MY HEART AND WALLET.

AUGH!!!!!! PIRATES MAN!!!!!!!!!!

[6yuns]

( 💤 anon just came back 2 life again omg..... ) HIIII YARIIIIII IM SO SORRY 4 DISAPPEARING!!!! i forgot abt tumblr & i didnt remember your username so forgive me pls my fav writer silly scrunkly sprinkle tinkle :( also, pls show that youre alive at least i can live in peace

you dont need 2 worry abt writing or some shit like that, everyone needs to take a break for themselves ! its okay, im sure anyone will understand it ^_^ i get that some days can be rough, but youve already came this far, didnt you? im sure such a amazing & strong person like you would get over hard obstacles, go yari go!!! dont be afraid to cry, crying is a way of our body to release tension, im sure you'll feel better aftwr releasing even a liiiiiittle bit of frustration. stress, frustration & etc is not something that you should only bottle up (emotions & feelings tbh) until you break, its good to let it out when necessary, ya know? i dont appear around here often, but i want to know if things are better, worse or the same as before!! im sure your existence already makes a lot of change in other people's life, anyone would be glad to have you in their lives ^_^ make sure to take break for yourself, dont push yourself too hard for others' wishes! drink water, eat & sleep properly, okay? dont eat more than you should BUT dont eat less than you should, dont skip meals or i will find you and kidnap you and torture you to kill you ❤ dont forget to drink water, its very important!!! sleep at least EIGHT hours, take a nap if you couldnt sleep before!! i believe in you, yari <3

enflish is not my first langauge I HATE BRITHS PEOPLE AND AMERIFCAN OJ MY FUCKINH HOD sorry for any spelling or greammar mistskwes my brain is not workrkinh too well rn. also i like to play these satusfifjnh games but it genuinely pisses me off when a level is hard WASNT IT SUPPOSED TO BE SATIDFYING. YOU STUOID FUCKINH BITCH I FUCKED YOUR MOTHER SHES SCREAMING HIGH PITCH (/ref) im also not good at comforting people sometimes sorry 4 anything

im actually crying, i love you so much. having you interact makes me so happy, ive been going through alot, found out my gma hot cancer (idrc cus i never liked her but its putting my mom in a bad place), im moving, also starting school again so this made me feel better and gave me the motivation to try again, i love you so much 💤 anon

and its okay that eng isnt your first language i cant even read the spelling mistakes cus im dyslexic and dont notice it so its spelled correctly lmfao!!! and im glad your getting into new stuff!!!!! pls reccomend some games to play cus all i play is honkai and idv [ i dont rlly play either of those games rn ]

[the-post-crow]

Velvet remain calm and think of the fun it will be once we escape and beat the [EXPLICATIVE] Out of them ay? Also you could say im a Lab BRAT HA. Even while being tortured and having spikes come out of my back I CAN STILL CRACK A JOKE like how I will crack your silly face! (:<

-📱Anon

*velvet is starting to act.... strange. His posture is near perfect and crystals are growing out of his skull.*

[relaxxattack]

wait omg what are the canon endgame wof pairings you DON'T like? 👀 no pressure of course, im just not a fan of several of them either and im interested to hear what you think :]

honestly most of them?? like idk 😭

ripnami for one is just odd to me. like i don’t dislike riptide but there’s an age difference and a like, immediate love type thing, and the romance is just sorta Boring and Annoying imo?? maybe that’s just cuz im gay though

starflights whole debacle was ATROCIOUS. like i understand why he mightve had a crush on sunny— she was like one of the only other people he knew growing up— but they were all essentially adopted siblings and she obviously felt platonically towards him? and then fatespeaker was brought in, and one part of fans hated her for replacing sunny cuz they shipped sunnyflight, another group of fans hated her for obviously being practically written AS a sunny replacement, and then the last third just fiercely loved her out of spite. so like. starspeaker is Cute, sure, but it just feels like a weird work around to the supreme awkwardness of sunnyflight.

clay and peril? ehhh. clay seems like, SO aromantic to me, so that’s one reason i dont like it, and the other is just. peril as a character always felt like she was handled weirdly. like im not sure if she was a good concept poorly executed, or a bad concept that sort of followed itself through well, but either way my feelings on her constantly go back and forth. i get that she’s probably just like, genuinely mentally ill, but i don’t think the author really represented it too well? but at the same time, i don’t think i’m one to talk on the rep of people like that. (is sociopath the right word??? i literally don’t even know). basically it bothers me how she swings from like. yandere to hilarious older sister character. i love her, but i also feel weird about her. she’s like a girboss in a bad way.

glorybringer… okay theyre really cute, it’s just their development feels a little silly to me. then again, it’s a children’s book. also there’s an age difference, although idk how much that counts for dragons??

moonbli: i hate moonbli okay. they dumped qinter— one of the Only Well Developed Ships— for moonbli. ive ranted before about how much i hate the winter-qibli-moon love triangle, but GOD it’s so bad. like— in book six, moon is fascinated by both the boys. winter treats her like shit, but she can hear that in his thoughts he actually thinks she’s incredible. qibli is nice to her, but he’s like, super sus for some reason. moon actually TELLS DS that she doesn’t like either of them, but she Must pick one because her futures say so? like UM??? (she’s aromantic but denying herself or something) meanwhile in the winter pov book he’s absolutely tortured by guilt and his abusive family, so eventually he breaks off to find moon because he feels bad for treating her bad cuz he’s in love with her. also they have some Moments together. then in qiblis book, he’s also in love with moon, but spends the entire book bonding and flirting with his roommate winter! who is no longer an asshole now that he’s broken off from his family. moon is busy hanging out with some 2000 year old guy who attempted literal genocide, but it’s okay because he’s sad. anyway after like 200 pages of flirting, winter and qibli meet up with moon again and they’re happy because they’re both in love with her or something. except winter is upset because moon is defending the guy who tried to genocide his race and is going to do it again. moon and qibli decide this makes winter the biggest asshole in the entire world, abandon him, and then defeat DS together without him. then moon decides she “chooses” qibli and moonbli becomes canon and they leave winter in some random ass town. like? WHAT THE FUCK??? and we’re supposed to enjoy the moonbli ship :|

like no fuck off and PLEASE give us aromantic moon and mlm qinter please. THERE ARE NO CANON MLM RELATIONSHIPS. and im not just saying this cuz im a gay guy, like qinter legitimately had so much good development throughout arc two and then they get dropped like a hot potato

and then finally we have… whats left, turtlejou? i could take it or leave it ig. too much weird magic stuff there. i would actually maybe prefer turtle and peril just because they’re Actually Friends and their dynamic in book 8 was cool and way less creepy then cleril.

sundew and willow? they're cute but ive seen the mean lesbian and nice lesbian trope many times and they just didn’t pull it off too well. still better then 90% of the ships here though.

SORRY THIS GOT SO LONG I HAD A LOT MORE TO SAY THEN I REALIZED…. IF THIS SOUNDS AGGRESSIVE ITS AIMED AT THE AUTHOR NOT AT YOU ANON

[huntingingoodwill]

happy birthday !!!! idk if im early or late or on time so i hope you have a really good bday! treat yourself, because you deserve it! 🖤🖤 will you accept my jonathan crane and robert fischer headcanons as a bday present? 😢 (me asking this like i just got on my knee and asked for your hand)

dear jonny loves when he's the center of his darling's attention. i feel like if his darling upsets him or he's mad at her, she'd desperately do anything to make it up to him. she'd be groveling the whole time and feeling upset, and this little man...he'd be milking it the whole time. ya, he'd sit there pouting and being grumpy and looking away while darling continues to cover his face and his neck in kisses, but secretly he's literally dying. inside he's all like 🤯😝🤪😍😘😏🔥 if that makes sense. he'd give her the silent treatment and she'd just be so upset and eager to please him. he'd come home from work, and she'd immediately throw herself at him, hugging and kissing him, telling him she's so sorry. and silly little jon is just indifferent to it, even though he is literally EATING it up.

as for robert, i don't know why but i feel like him and his fiance would have like a private bachelor/bachelorette party with just the two of them. and this party, robert really lets loose because it's his girl, what is he if he's not open with her? he'd REALLYYYY go wild. he's be singing ABBA at the top of his lungs, dancing on tables, and even stripping (stripper robert in a firefighter costume is literally killing me right now im so sorry 😭) future mrs. fischer would just laugh hysterically and even throw her bra at him like people do at concerts. it definitely is one of the best nights of her life because shes never seen robbie act this way and frankly, she's fallen even more in love with him!

thats all i have for today </3 HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN !!! i love birthdays, im so excited for yours! i hope you eat lots of cake and do everything your heart desires <3 much love !!!

-🦇

send me hcs :)))

rpat anon mon frère i love you!!!

thanks so much for the wishes and the hc 💕 ily and of course i’ll accept 🤧 i love your hcs please keep sendin them in. you always make my day :,)

jonathan being toxic + emotionally manipulative and robert being cute below the cut

absolutely. i mentioned something similar in a yan alphabet response (tumblr and its tags refuse to work, perhaps it’s lost to the world now. i mourn it.) jon's used to secretly pining and having his world revolve around darling so any reciprocation makes him want to scream. so he takes advantage, because he’s... well... a bad person! jon's really stubborn. he already puts on a fairly cold front but when he’s mad it’s brutal. silent treatment, a lot of brushing by darling or just watching them across the room, then looking away when they look back at him. he's mastered the icy, condescending look and it's an immediate indicator that something's wrong, and it makes darling's heart sink. he knows how to amp up the hurt and push the blame fully onto darling and make them feel sooo guilty. they'd try so hard to get back into his good books. puppy dog eyes, pouting, extra affection (tons of kisses, hugs, darling suddenly becomes extra clingy. very much tugging on his sleeve.), bringing him lunch- it makes him melt. he wants so badly to fall at their feet like YES IT'S OKAY I LOVE YOU 😭 but he makes them wait. it’s torturous. they'll hug him, burying their head in his chest, mumbling "i'msorryi'msorryi'msorry", clutching onto his sweater. nothing. for days. he may even slowly remove their arms from around his waist and leave. but one day he’ll very slowly hug them back. as a gift. darling's so relieved as he's finally not mad at them, and jon's even more relieved because though he loves the attention, he's been aching to reciprocate it. he's probably the type to lecture them after- "it's all for your own good" (condescending, as always). he explains while holding them, wiping away their tears. he's suddenly so gentle, so comforting, so kind. manipulative.

s t o p. that's so cute. i've always thought about what rob would be like at parties (i had an imagine planned where he's at a house party but i put it on hold. idk if anyone would want that?? lmao lmk ig) he's a little shy and acts serious (busy businessman things) - but i think he's got a bit of a silly sense of humour and can cut loose in the right setting- if his s.o. works with him they'd cajole him into going to the office christmas party and he'd just stand there like 🙃 with a little party hat on his head. downer. but in private!! him drunk with a wide smile and flushed pink cheeks. he'd totally wear his tie around his head as a headband, shirt unbuttoned. drunk businessman chic!!! he's my lil rockstar actually, and he'd do a disco medley for his number one fan. his voice cracking as he tries to reach the high notes in the bee gees songs>>> so many slurred lyrics, clumsy saturday night fever inspired dancing, and "you're so pretty." "no, you're pretty!" flying around all night. they'd rent a karaoke room, one of those bougie private ones with drinks, snacks, fancy mics and cool party lighting. and a great view of the city. stumbling home with each other, arms around each other's shoulders, singing and dancing in the street. couple of the century.

thank you so much rpat anon!! ily ily

[allyrose28]

Fan girl thoughts on twd 11.06 “on the inside”. (Im on my phone tried to do the trick to do under the cut I don’t think it’s working so......)

Spoiler warning!!!

-Ok touché walking dead for finally making me care about C0nnie. If you read my blog, y’all know I’m pretty blatant about my dislike for the new characters and the (in my opinion) overhyping of this particular character. But damn! This episode was great! Lauren ridloff really did an amazing job. I was never looking forward to her stand alone return episode so here I am fully admitting I was wrong. It was far from boring.

- C0nnie and Virgil? That is some chemistry there. Am I spite shipping? I mean call it that if you want but I really did like their scenes together. I can see the story going in that direction if Virgil makes it out alive.

- I’m interested to read what the reviewers will have to say about their scenes together. I mean they wrote whole dissertations why C0nnie is the love of Daryl’s life based on an arm pat, some music playing in the background during their first conversation and an asl book. Surely if one can make a whole love story out of those crumbs they can also see signs here? ( haha I can’t even say this with a straight face I am fully expecting reviewers to write “now that C0nnie is back how will Daryl navigate through his feelings for both L3ah and COnnie the only two people he could possibly love”)

- I fully expect that to be the title of the insider article written by acuna or mason.

- speaking of L3ah. Saw the spoilers. Saw the absolute meltdown Caryl fans had not just in tumblr but other forums. Not everyone but those anons know who they are. Silence now that they see ONCE AGAIN the spoilers are misleading when you don’t have the full context of the scene.

- I know the frost scene is upsetting and It broke my heart for Daryl. But Im not going to lie I had so many nsfw thoughts when Daryl took off his vest before having to torture frost.

- I mean... he’s just so... and his tight shirt.. I just

- ok sorry back to the episode

- wait no when Daryl pulled out his knife when carver found the trap door under the rug.... also hot af. Showing once again Daryl is and will always be team family and no silly ex lover will change that.

- not looking forward to the melt down when spoilers come out for next episode. I do wish the anons and people in other forums who keep saying they give up on Caryl and want Carol to go to Mexico by herself to be truly happy would truly stick to their word and leave the tag. It’s fine if you give up. It’s fine if you really are just sticking around for carol and mmb...but then please stop posting on Caryl tags. I know this is coming off nasty but I had a super hard week and the meltdown on Friday when spoilers came out had me almost deleting tumblr... a place I go to escape the nonsense of real life.

- as for Caryl... I really cannot wait for Daryl and Carol to be reunited again. Idk how or when but I just miss them and fully expect their reunion to be epic after everything they are currently going through separately.

[infinites-chaser]

Librarian! PH. 52 MLQC MC / Victor :)

HELLO ANON U WERE ONE OF THE FIRST PEOPLE TO RESPOND TO MY LIBRARIAN ASK GAME I’M SO SORRY IT’S TAKEN SO LONG,,, victor is just. hard to write. aLSO I'm doubly sorry since i’ll be combining this with the Victor ask from @truth-be-told-im-lying ​ hope neither of you mind T-T i don’t think my mind could do two victor ficlets akwlfjsdkls

ANyway I love you both LOTS AND LOTS hopefully this attempt at Victor isn’t extremely out of character;;; it’s a lowkey soulmates AU if that counts for anything :> aND this fic gets the special treatment of an actual Title bc True was wonderful enough to help me by typing Victor as an Enneagram Type One

okaaay and without further ado, 

49, 52 + Victor/MC

‘[He] wakes up in [his] bed, determined to begin again.’- These Ghosts Are Family, Maisy Card. (pg. 49)

‘As [he] pushes through the onlookers to meet [her], he is certain he is the only person moving.’- These Ghosts Are Family, Maisy Card. (pg. 52)

((pronoun changes in both quotes to better fit the ficlet))

spoilers for Victor/MC’s childhood!

spend my whole life searching

Victor doesn’t believe in soulmates. (After half a lifetime of searching turning up nothing, he doesn’t believe in much.)

Once upon a time, he might’ve. (He wanted to). His heart rate doubled and sped up to match hers— a carefree little girl skipping across the road, too far away to hear his nerves cry danger, too caught up in dreams and fantasies to hear his warning shout. Time slowed down so he could save her, and on that afternoon on the crosswalk, drops of rain suspended in the air, he did.

At that age, he hadn’t had the sense to wonder why a young girl like her had been crossing the street without supervision. Why her smiles had come freely, but had always looked a little sad, a little wistful. Why she’d been so eager to accept his baked treats. Why she’d been at the playground without a parent. Why she’d always been alone.

Now, seventeen years later, he wishes he did. Wishes he’d known something as simple as her last name.

He dreams of her. Of finding her again: the girl whose heartbeat matched his. The girl whose smile had slowed down time itself for him, as if short moments with her could’ve each stretched into a gentle eternity. He’d wanted them to. He’d wanted to capture every moment spent with her, to make them last, to savor them, so they’d pass slow and sweet like honey on the tongue.

Time had passed slow when he’d wanted it to. Those sunlit afternoons had been sweet, they’d been happy.

Only, time is a fickle thing. When he takes his eye off it, it races away, too fast for him to keep up.

The kidnapping. The experiments. The torture.

The escape.

She saves him. He’s too slow to save her.

And even if he can stop time, here’s the thing: he can never turn the clock back.

Still, he wakes up. Every morning, he gets out of bed. Gets dressed and goes to work. The world around him moves on, and demands he does, too, even if his heart’s still eleven years old and clutching her motionless body, eleven years old, the only sound in his ears his pounding pulse, the absence of the accompaniment of hers an accusation more painful than any hateful words.

It’s a recurring theme in his life, time. It’s ironic, really, when he thinks about it. That he can stop time without lifting a finger, and yet, when it comes to things he cares about, people he loves most, he’s always eleven years old again, always too late.

(His Evol’s time control, but perhaps, all this time, he hasn’t been controlling time, it’s been controlling him. He’s imprisoned by a single moment, a memory, a regret. A past that can never be undone.)

Whenever he has spare time, he devotes himself to searching. Resigns himself to the fact he’ll probably never find her, if all he has to go off of is a child’s face, once preserved in his memory, now fading. Hair color. Eye color. Age. A name. Nothing more.

The searches turn up nothing. 

He spends late nights in the office to distract himself, builds up a capitalist kingdom of a company, if only to put off for a few hours more the prospect of returning home to face his nightmares alone.

His father praises him for LFG’s growth over dinners filled with awkward silences. The name Victor Li appears more and more often in business newspapers. Investors approach him. He gets interviews. Gets offers for TV appearances, for sponsorships.

He takes them, these material successes. Wonders if any amount of them could ever make up for the failure from his childhood. If they could bring her back. He tells himself if he finds her, when he finds her, when he brings her back, it’ll be to a more perfect world. One in which he’ll never fail her again. It’s a foolish thought, but it keeps him going. With it in mind, he proceeds to work twice as hard.

Souvenir is what saves him. A small allowance, a self-indulgence, a seed of hope planted in what he thinks is his darkest time.

It’s for her, more than any of his frantic searching ever was. A dream, a foolish one, that one day she’ll step through his memories and through the restaurant’s door, that one day they’ll share a pudding together again, their hearts beating as one.

He doesn’t get to open Souvenir often; his job doesn't let him. He made sure of that, long ago. But when he does, after the last customer’s left, and he’s put up the closed sign, he cooks for two.

(The first time, Mr. Mills had taken a single look at his silent, still face, and his expression must've spoken volumes. The older man hadn't said a word, only helped clean the kitchen after, the normally gentle lines around his mouth pulled taut in a worried frown.)

He sets the second place at the table himself: carefully places fork, knife and spoon beside lukewarm appetizers, tucks a napkin under soup bowls going cold. Watches the empty seat and the untouched meal for an eternity before finally eating his own. His technique's impeccable. It has been ever since he'd aced his culinary lessons, since he'd bought out the school. He'd used the finest ingredients. He always does.

The food still crumbles like ash in his mouth. (It always does.)

Mr. Mills will find him there, nursing a glass of wine long into the night. He knows better not to question it, but sometimes he'll pull up a chair, drink a glass, too. talk of everything and nothing, talk of his parents, his sister's family, of times gone by.

Victor will never admit it, but the older man's presence makes those nights less hard. his stories, his memories — they keep the ice in his heart from spreading any further when it feels like nothing else will.

Ten years stretch into thirteen, into fourteen, into fifteen, into a broken clock, time stopped because does the passage of time mean anything if he measures it, measured it in time with her? If she's gone?

The meals shrink. First appetizers vanish, then entrees too, until all that's left are desserts, puddings that he stares at all evening, puddings a girl had loved once, that he can almost imagine her sitting there eating, her noticing him watching her and her answering blush and smile. His smile back.

Almost, because after all these years without her, he can’t quite imagine her face. Not as she would look now. Not even as she was, seventeen years back.

(He dreams and finds he doesn’t remember what her smile looked like, exactly. Doesn’t remember the sound of her heartbeat mingling with the sound of his.

Memory is cruel. Memory is imperfect. No matter if you can stop time, no matter how hard you try to memorize a moment, when you revisit it, it’ll never be the same as when you lived it the first time.)

Then:

The day starts like any other. He wakes up, gets out of bed, gets ready for another day of work, another night of searching. He scrolls emails while waiting for his espresso machine to heat, then puts his tablet aside when the coffee's done. He eats in silence. As always, he's done five minutes before he needs to leave for the company, the perfect amount of time for him to do a last-minute check in the mirror— his tie's straight, his shirt unwrinkled, not a hair on his head out of place. The reflection that stares back at him is unchanging; these days it barely shows even the passage of time.

He sighs. Shakes the thought off like the piece of lint it is on his otherwise immaculate state of being, and heads for the door, the lock automatically clicking behind him at eight o'clock am, exactly on schedule, exactly as planned.

He's about to take a seat in his car when an inexplicable urge to walk to work takes hold of him. He pauses. Calculates and re-calculates the time it would take (fifteen minutes, not accounting for rush hour traffic making crosswalks slow), and he's about to decide it's not worth it, it's a silly thought, but the urge intensifies.

Do it, the eleven-year-old in his heart seems to be telling him. You won't regret it.

He frowns and rubs his forehead— for a moment, he wonders if all his searching, all his foolish hopes are finally getting to his brain.

He decides to take the walk, anyway.

He regrets it, not nine minutes later, when despite the sun's light shining strong through the clouds, a light rain begins to fall.

Worse still, the traffic lights haven't changed once in the past ninety seconds. He won't be late, he'd accounted for this, but he's stuck in a crowd of pedestrians, and their chatter's beginning to grate on his nerves. He's considering calling the mayor about it after exactly one hundred seconds have passed— clearly, the light's broken, this is far too long for commuters to wait— but then, finally the walk sign flicks on.

He's already across the street when it happens:

First, a phone rings.

Then, the loud honking of a car.

Tires screech.

Time slows. Time stops.

He's back on the crosswalk in a matter of heartbeats, the inattentive idiot in his arms (it's a girl, it's always a girl, hair dark, eyes wide, expression shocked).

"You..." She says, blinking up at him with those wide, almost-familiar eyes. Distantly, he registers the echo of a heartbeat overlapping with his.

"Who are you?"

Who are you? His mind asks, but deep in his heart, he already knows the answer. It can't be.

"Evolver?" He says instead, shoving down memories that threaten to surface: another rainy day, another crosswalk, another heart that had seemed matched to his. He tells himself he's being delusional, that he thinks he can hear her heartbeat because she's in his arms, wide-eyed and fragile, her heartrate skittering back and forth like a fool— this isn't like his careful, methodical searching, this is a fluke beyond flukes, it means nothing, it'll lead to nothing in the end.

But she's in his arms, warm and soft against his protective embrace, she's in his arms and it feels so right it's almost painful, his pulse pulled into a panicked pace to match hers.

He sets her down abruptly, as if burned, and turns to go.

"Someone can't come to your rescue every time."

Around them, suspended raindrops begin to fall. The world, resumed. The world, once again predictable and mundane. Except for her.

He knows, without looking back, she's staring after him, her heart, his heart, still racing.

He allows himself a smile.

He allows himself some small sliver of hope.

(His frozen time starts moving again.)

[thisdreamplace]

I had a nasty fight with my former bff. This was long ago. She did the whole 'boycotting me' thing at school and afterwards had a mutual friend pass her msg to me, saying "tell her [me] to get it into her skull that she's not the center of the world, who does she think she is? Stop acting like a #" Im simplifying the words, her actual words were nastier

I got thinking today abt this fight, and her comment abt me that is still way too fresh in my mind even tho I hadn't recalled it in 2-3 yrs!, and I actually decided to use the law to revise my friendship to feel better as what happened after the fight was shameful on my part. But before I knew it, I started rmmbring my relationship with her. How I became a total victim. Got so stuck on her validation, begged her to be friends with me (after I got the degrading msg. 🤕 silly me w/o a backbone lol) and stayed her 'bestie' for way too long. Only after it's all over im noticing smth messed up abt out 'feiendship'. It wasnf that normal I think. She would get so pissed if I did anything that went against her thoughts/beliefs/way (which is why she called me a selfish # that major fight). It was so subtle the way she showed her disapproval. To her, if I did anything not aligned with her, or even makih decisions on my own which didn't involve her, it was wrong. And had consequences like her beinf distant for days etc, or getting angry if I didn't mind read her bla bla, I just had to keep her at the top 24/7 and she expected everyone else to do the same... which I thought was normal... It wasnt. And what would be even more crazy is she never realized how that meant she always wanted the attention. That she always wanted it her way! It just makes me feel... Sad.... When I look back. How couldn't I have notived it before? I used to be strong headed, opinionated before I became 'besties' with her.. That all has changed. I wonder why -_-

It may be dumb on my part but with the weak mind and insecurity I had then, I took that fight/her reaction to the heart and internalisef this stupidiy (DENY MYSELF if the other alternative was denying HER. I didn't think it was wrong. For the oldme, it really wasn't wrong smh). Aaah I'm so sorry old me :(

This fight started bcoz she asked me for smth and I refused, instead of relenting like I always would, and I see now that her reaction (to me not being an obedient # to her ig?🤢) was basically her setting rules. It was wrong of me to refuse, yes, but why did she react that way? Why did this pattern continue? That everyone was selfish if they didn't think of her ;_; like how do u deal with this? And the icing is when I too started to defend her and make excuses for her all the time. And ik I'm making her out to be so strong, don't worry... I accept the strong only rule when the weak submit. And I was weak as hell, so its understandable this whole thing. I think 😅

Idk. I seen your posts abt eyipo with other anons so i hope u can tell me figure out what this was. Its clear to me she was projecting smth about me, and mb throughout our whole friendship she was projecting me. And I would think it was her hurting me, that she was right and I was wrong or maybe I did smth wrong. Mb I thought I deserved being punished that way?!

Today I suddenly had an aha moment and I realised... this is how a victim thinks. I didn't know I was a victim when I was living that stoey aka thought I was powerless. When in fact I really wasn't?! Haha still accepting I 555% created ALL that. The law can knock you out haha

Enough old story I just want to ask, what du u think the msg she sent to me was? Did I really deserve such a reaction (did I mention she included other girls in the boycot? 🤢) just for standing up for myself? What about the whole 'fight' aka showcase of power? And the entire yrs of being friends why did I never realize I was only hurting myself so much by putting her before me? And also, with the everyone pushed out thing, how did it fit in? Like why the hell did I give her too much power in validating me by giving in after the fight in the first place?, and while I did have some fun times (saying this so anyone else who reads this doesn't think it was pure torture lol. We had some common interests tyat no one else in the class shared when we first became 'friends'), deep down I was so unhappy so why didn't this reflect on her? I mean why didn't she ever sense just how much she'd hurt me, why didn't she see how much I put on the back burner coz of her?! Was it as she saw it as her right? I'm just so confused

This is still a bitter pill to swallow tbh but I have to face this in order to move on. This person and my life with her has left me wit many scars and I got to understand how I did this so I never attract such a person in my life again. Its not even abt bejnf a victim. As I said, these victimy things were subtle and I only noted them when it was too late and I was a shell, like she getting super pissed and disapproving if I had a differing opinion and me blowijg it out of proportion and tailoring my views or not expressing them so as to not feel the disapproval...thanks boycott conditioning ig? 😭 Aaaah even talking agaunst her rn is making me uncomfortable. Which makes me think I still am scared of her subconsciously even tho she's no longer in my life. Like, what in me made me choose her? I haven't healed, obviously by this ask as u can tell, but idk what is it in my self concept that had this whole thing in my past even happen

My friend, I also want to say I think you're a beautiful soul 🥺. And im sorry for the long ask lol. And I pray you'll always have all your desires. And plz, was it hard for u at first when u learned about u creating everything? The good, the bad, and the repulsive (like this story)? How did u get over old stories? Ty ty ty 😭

To begin with you're being really harsh on yourself. Like, I know it's hard, but it's never that serious. And trust me, this is something I have to remind myself of regularly. Because there have definitely been moments in life where I look back on myself in that moment, and I feel like I was pathetic and would slap myself if I could. But the truth is, there's just no need for any of that. We always did the best we could. We always did, period. We couldn't have done anything differently and this will continue to be true our entire lives. Looking back on the past with such overwhelming feelings, is really not needed. I get looking back to learn from it, but practice coming from a place of love and acceptance instead. It will help you grow, rather than get stuck back in this cycle of self-hate and confusion. Plus, you actually never need to analyze the past to grow but that's beyond the point right now.

To me, by reading your ask, the message she sent to you was clear. You feel you deserve less in life, you feel you're not good enough, you feel like a victim to life and others, you feel like you're not empowered or the operant power of your reality. It's not about her being wrong and you being right, and I get this is one of the hardest pills to swallow. Everyone is you pushed out. Therefore, there's simply no such thing as who is right and who is wrong anymore. It was only ever you.

When it comes to everyone is you pushed out, you have to understand this person isn't this way because that's who they are. They were that way because that's who you were. Inside of you, you brought their character to life. Therefore, the same way you are not stuck to such an undesirable self concept, neither is that person. It's not that you chose her and attracted her in. You were just dealing with yourself. That's what I hope you walk away from this response understanding. Because by thinking she was outside of you, you're missing the mark. And this is such an important concept to understand when it comes to the law of assumption, because it's really at the forefront of everything. People play such a huge role in our lives, whether it's relationships, jobs, opportunities, etc etc. So understanding how everyone is you pushed out actually works is extremely important.

So instead of putting all this blame on her or even putting the blame on yourself, all these memories really do is give you a glimpse into who you were at the time. It shows you the beliefs you held about yourself. It shows you what your self concept was. That's all it's doing. So in that way, there's actually no one to blame at all. I know it feels good to put blame, even when it's on yourself, but the truth is there's no room for blame when you learn about the law. You simply take responsibility and become empowered by the power you have held this entire time. And you practice making it work in your favor.

If you want to see how something was apart of your self concept, all you have to do is pay attention to what you are thinking/feeling. Shame, not being good enough, etc etc is all just stories you once held onto. Now you don't have to hold onto those stories anymore. Now that you know the power you hold, you get to make a new decision for yourself. Rather than ruminating of the painful past, allow it to be and know how that's not your story anymore.

Was it difficult for me to accept how I created everything? Yes and no. It's been a journey. While I could accept it logically, emotionally it was still very painful. Many times I wanted to cry and lash out when I felt alone and felt upset that no one was there for me. Although, I knew deep down it appeared that way because of my own concept of self. So yeah, it's been a journey. And it's honestly not always delightful. But this is the journey we have to take for the rest of our lives, so we might as well get used to practicing and applying these concepts. Instead of continuing to hold ourselves in such painful lights. I got through old stories, and I continue to get through old stories, by feeling all the pain that came up. By allowing myself to cry and feel however I felt like during those times. And in the back of my mind I knew I was getting stronger in my power. I knew how I would keep persisting once the pain subsided. And little by little, old stories fade more and more. That persistence to continue choosing better for yourself, is truly more powerful than it may seem in a difficult moment. Have trust in how it's all working out for you regardless.

Hopefully this is helpful! Thank you for your kind words. 💖

[writingsbychlo]

I saw the other anon's ask about tmr thomas slander and honestly, tiktok has a pattern of slandering characters who don't deserve it and trying to redeem characters who can't/shouldn't be redeemed. With that being said, what's your opinion on Teresa? I see so much on tiktok about how she "deserved better" and she "did what she thought was right" but I just don't agree personally.

At some point, Teresa had to realize what she was doing was wrong but continued to do it anyways. Sure she "saved" Thomas but she only felt bad about what she was doing because she was hurting Thomas. I really think that if Thomas had gone with her back to WCKD, she wouldn't have felt nearly as bad. Overall, I'm not a fan of Teresa.

teresa’s death was fully warranted and that ridiculous kiss at the end was a silly attempt to add some kind of romantic gesture to movies that didn’t need it at all to be good and only undid every piece of character/plot development there had been. she was a bad character and I get she was trying to do what was right and she was manipulated when she was young but so were the rest and everybody else chose to act in the majority interest whereas she chose to act in her own self-interest and literally excused mass murder, kidnapping and torture by saying “im doing it for my mom”. teresa is honestly just an awful person and she makes me sick, her choices were wrong, she’s selfish and cruel and only wanted to find a cure because she refused to move on from her trauma, she didn’t actually care for anyone else, because if she did she wouldn’t have killed and tortured people for a solution. ahem, anyway-

[maschotch]

hey, anon again. I wanted to message you after I finished the s5 finale. I like the unique dynamics btwn hotch morgan and prentiss as a whole, but kinda biased towards hotch so far. I would say that my fav season would be a tie between s1 and s4. s4 loses some points cause of Rossi related stuff but it had some strong eps and s1 was where it all started. (altho s2 is a strong contender now w your takes) One thing I'm still not used to about this show is the way the finales are one shots – (1/?)

hello anon! welcome back!!

im gonna put the discussion under the read more so its not too clunky. tw sa

hotch emily and morgan are definitely my favs lmao so im just gonna call it good taste and move on ;P

season 4 has some truly legendary episodes. pleasure is my business, 52 pickup, minimal loss, normal, demonology, a shade of grey... truly truly iconic criminal minds moments right there. i completely understand the rossi thing. personally, the atrocious acting and the just plain stupid writing is so funny to me. i think because its so bad it makes it easy to dismiss and ignore? and when im forced to look at it, it’s just funny, so i can laugh it off and call him a silly old grandpa. he definitely has some truly horrid moments (theres an episode wayy later that has his Genuinely Irredeemable Moment for me) but the rest of the season is so good i really just try to ignore it

i’m so excited to get to season 5. the parallels between hotch and foyet with elle and the fisher king is bone chilling tbh. and the practically explicit references to sexual assault? with elle we get it through her dialogue with reid, and it’s more an allusion than anything else. i think its meant to be more of a “he stuck his hand in her wound instead of outright sexually assaulting her” but her conversation and connection with the victims in aftermath is a direct reference. but with hotch i feel like it was more visual and less of a discussion. mostly because we got to see it happen, but foyet stripping, laying hotch down, impaling him over and over, watching his fists clench, “maybe this will change the way you profile” all of that can be directly interpreted as foyet sexually assaulting hotch.

and then the brutal beating of foyet in 100? again, the circumstances were different for elle in aftermath: elle sought out lee and foyet was on his way to kill jack. but its so so interesting to watch hotch’s sense of morality develop and morph and twist over the seasons and it really makes his treatment of her after the fisher king that much more brutal. i think some people like to call him hypocritical, but to me i feel like he becomes much more lenient with his team after elle and makes more and more exceptions for the others throughout the seasons until he’s finally confronted with foyet. it’s less hypocritical and more.. a change of heart. because i think if you asked season 4 hotch how he felt about how he handled elle’s situation in s2, he would know it was wrong. he just learned too late.

foyet/100 was a fun little torture session for hotch and i love watching my little guy get beat up <3 but it doesnt excuse the extremely misogynistic writing with regards to haley. the writers have never treated haley well: they abandon whatever semblance of a character she was intended to have and just twist her into whatever’s currently needed to hurt hotch the most. so doing all that and then killing her just so hotch can have another tragedy in his life was just really a bad move. if it was me i think it would be way funnier but just as emotionally devastating for hotch if haley just got remarried lmao. and his decision to return to work immediately after her death was absolutely the wrong choice. i dont think they necessarily outright approve it: they have to concede at least a little that hotch has to be some kind of fucked up in the head to just leave his son alone while continuing in his extremely dangerous job. and jessica suddenly appearing and being perfectly willing to take on the responsibility of his child whenever it’s convenient for him is definitely a cop out on their end. but unless they wanted him to leave the show, there was really no other choice to be made.

mild spoiler: there’s an interesting line wayyyyyyy later about how after haley died “aaron hotchner was never the same. which meant [the team] was never the same” and i think thats just such a neat way of confirming that just because hotch doesn’t talk about it at all, doesn’t mean the others didn’t feel the staggering effects it had on the team as a whole. it changed the mindset. there are direct consequences now. the monsters can follow you home. and sometimes, even if you do everything right, they can still win.

foyet really is the ultimate villain of criminal minds. they try to outdo him in different ways, trying to make things bigger and badder with each season, but nothing hits quite as hard as that last phone call with haley. and her final hug to jack? just kill me tbh. that being said, i truly dont think it could’ve happened to anyone but hotch. no one is as invested in the job. he’s dedicated so much already, sacrificed so much already. he’s dragged the team through hell and pulled them back to the light each time. he’s the solid unwavering pillar of the team, and he has no choice but to stand tall without risking the entire team crumbling. he’s invested more into developing the bau family than he has his own, so its not something he’s going to just abandon. and certainly not for his own sake. he lives for others so to have something so devastating be his fault rips through him to the core, scarring him deeper than foyet’s knife ever could. and even though he can’t falter and pushes on, that failure is a constant weight on his mind that he can’t--and honestly shouldn’t--ever brush off.

very happy to hear from you and very excited for you to get to season 6. i dont know how much you’ve heard, so i’ll keep my thoughts to myself for now. thank you for the update! it’s so so interesting to watch someone else experience significant events of a show for the first time. i think i was like 12 or 13 when i watched cm for the first time? i only got to s7 by then i think (honestly i dont think anything else had been released at that point) so its been a long time since my first experience. its cringy, its copaganda, its problematic in all the ways you’d expect from a crime show, but the characters are really something else and take it to the next level. time moves on, interests fade, but i keep coming back to this stupid fucking show and im excited to see someone else enjoy it.

(your third ask did not make it to my inbox :( tumblr fucking sucks lmao)