#IT IS EMBARRASSING HOW LONG I SPENT THINKING ABOUT THESE

[voxisdaddy]

Love Me, Please

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel

Pairings: Alastor/Lucifer/Adam/Husk/Angel/Vox/Valentino/Tom Trench/Saint Peter

Type: Scenarios/Comfort

C/TW: Swearing, blood, reader written with fem parts in mind (bc this bout periods, duh)

In which you miss your boyfriend/cling to your boyfriend and are being emotional about it. Basically—period emotions.

This is more for me bc it’s that time of the month and I desperately want some comfort lol | also Angel’s I left up to either be platonic or romantic

Alastor

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ He was at yet another unremarkable overlord meeting when he felt something pulling on him. Back at the hotel, you laid on your bed wrapped in a cocoon of sorts, eyes tiredly watching your shadow pulling on one of Alastor’s shadows-which he left to keep an eye on you. Alastor’s grin turned to one of amusement—oh how needy you are when it’s that time of the month for you. The meeting finally came to a close and instead of making his way back to the hotel with a lovely stroll, he disappears in his shadows. Not before bidding a friendly farewell with his dear friend, Rosie. He materializes in the center of your room with a shit eating grin as he twirls his microphone around.

“I was hardly apart from you for more than an hour, my dear.”

Lucifer

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Lucifer had errands he couldn’t postpone today and so he made you promise to text him when you miss him and he’ll make his way right back in a jiffy! The bedroom door only closed behind him when he got a text from you. An ‘I miss you’ along with a sad face emoticon. He burst the door open, tears welling up in his eyes, as he crawled back into bed with you to hold you close. You honestly thought he was more emotional than you at the moment.

“My poor ducky! I’m sowwy!”

Adam

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Adam has been around for ages so I like to think he knows a bit about menstruation. On top of that, he has an army of baddies he likes spending time with-usually training but that's still time spent with them regardless. However he's definitely still rough around the edges since usually with his girls, he uses that to egg them on into being tougher fighters either physically or emotionally. If you're a person who's quick to be a grump or a crying mess then uhhh...just know he doesn't mean to be a dick all the time. He tries though, despite how annoying and tiresome it is. Especially since you make him feel oh so special with how you seem to demand his attention and his attention only. Right now you lay on his chest, looking on at the items set on the coffee table with a glint of amusement.

"Babe-you said pads with wings! I got that! I even made sure the chicken wings came with the good sauce."

Husk

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Husk is very vigilant so he's quickly able to come to the conclusion that you're on your period before even you realize it. It was just after he finished closing up the bar and returned to your room for a late nights rest when he smelt it. He might technically be an old man, but he's a respectful one and has been around for quite some time. He knows that small. Despite knowing you might be embarrassed to find out that he can smell it, he figured you'd be more grateful that he woke you up so you can deal with it before you wake up feeling all gross and annoyed in the morning. Plus it was worth it to almost immediately get a hug from you after being apart for a few extra hours than he liked.

"Come on. Don't wanna ruin your new pajama's now, do you baby doll?

Angel Dust

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ This man was out on a much needed night out with his long time bestie, Cherri Bomb. You of course coming as his plus one that his bestie always welcomed like the supportive girly she is. He couldn't quite enjoy himself as much this time around though as he sat at in a corner booth with you hunched over your drink. You're hand gripping one of his hands as if you're afraid he's gonna leave. Despite how awkward he felt trying to comfort you, he did his best and allowed himself to be as sympathetic as much as he could.

"Toot's-if you wanna leave it's okay! You know I'll stick with ya! No need to make ya headache worse than it already is!"

Vox

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Vox still holds certain belief's and mindsets he had from his time in the 1950's. Part of that meaning him being 'grossed out' by your period and beliefs in woman faking or over exaggerating their monthly disturbances. He learned to keep his opinions to himself though, due to previous encounters with Velvette, and found it easier to just well, cater to your needs. They were easy enough for the most part. Food and beverage cravings? He's got ya covered. Cramps and aches? You're in luck because this man is basically one large heating pad. Which quickly became a downside for him because then you wanted him all the time. Didn't matter if he was working or not. He tried to put his foot down once but it only made you emotional so uhhh-

"Honey, I'll only be gone for one hour. As soon as the meeting ends, I'll lay my head on your stomach, okay?"

Valentino

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Valentino can only smirk to himself when he finds out it's now your time of the month. Which isn't hard to figure out since he woke up to you latched onto him like a koala this morning. A puff of red smoke invades your senses as a pair of arms wrap around your shoulders, a third hand coming to play with the top of your head. Valentino, spending years working with woman and people who endure this bloody cycle, knows a few...remedy's. He has his favourite solutions, obviously. Only if you're down. The last time he tried being more...persuasive with his advances to you during these times, it didn't go well-to put it lightly.

"Mi cariño~A good fucking helps with this time of the month, you kno-" ... "Or we could share some snacks. Kitty!"

Tom Trench

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ For this man I pray you are not a bitch on your period. Poor guy already has to deal with his co-star Katie Killjoy everyday. Whatever you deal with on your period though, just know your man is there and keeps your needy ass close. Such as right now, as you sit in an oversized fuzzy hoodie on Tom's couch, watching him and Katie host the latest news live. You glance down at your phone with Tom's messages open. You want to text him but you knew it wouldn't reach him anyways-they had to keep their devices on silent while they hosted. As soon as they were finished with their shift of the day however, Tom rushed to his dressing room to find you staring at the door with open arms.

"The interns told me you were waiting for me."

Saint Peter

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ This man would never admit it out loud, and if he did he would word it very carefully, but he loves it when its your time of the month. I mean he feels bad for you obviously; dealing with an inconvenience once a month even in your afterlife does not sound like any sort of blessing, but he's clingy and affectionate himself. And you clinging to him just as much? Oh it's like he's died and went to Heaven-again! Currently he lays on the couch with you in his arms, you both engulfing each other in a snuggly cuddle. He periodically checks the time-as much as he loves this he's still got a job to do. He voices this but quickly finds himself soothing you.

"I'm only going to work, sweetheart! P-please don't cry!"

This was supposed to be reader missing them but some of them became not exactly that and I’m sorry lol

I’ve had this in my drafts for a month, felt about right to finally post it. I’m also ashamed to admit, it took me way too long trynna figure out what to write for Tom’s dialogue. I love him but if I don’t know him as well as I thought 😭

[farfromharry]

Summary: Lando finally wins a race and learns all he needed was a good luck charm

Lando Norris x Reader

w/c 933

━━━━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━━━━

It had been a long and tiring journey for Lando in regards to getting his first race win. 5 years in Formula 1, almost 700 points and 15 podiums and he thought it was never going to happen— at least not if Max Verstappen had anything to say about. And then came along you.

At first you were nothing more than a friend of a friend, someone who had suddenly started appearing at group hang outs, who maybe caught his eye once or twice, purely for the fact you were an unfamiliar face. Suddenly you were everything.

It was a party for someone’s birthday when you spoke for the first time. He had come to the bar for another drink, only to be completely ignored by the bartender in favour of some pretty girls down the other end of the bar. You appeared a few moments later, grinning at the racing driver’s clear annoyance. You tapped his shoulder gently to grab his attention, “Watch this.”

All you’d said was excuse me, which he had already tried, and the man came running. You ordered your own drink and urged Lando to do the same. From that point on he was in complete awe of you. It was such a simple action and yet he thought you were completely fascinating. He had found himself so speechless that he didn’t even say anything to stop you from walking away afterwards. Only then did he realise he’d gotten a free drink too.

It felt like the next few weeks of his life were consumed by thoughts of you, until he finally bucked up the courage to start asking around. It all felt pointless until he saw you again at a party he’d thrown in the hopes you would show up. And you did. It seemed his plan was off to a good start.

He tried not to make it obvious that he was looking at you, or for you. He didn’t want to creep you out. In the end it was you that approached him, which took a lot of the fear out of the situation. No longer did he have to find the courage to go up to you— which he was really struggling with.

“I heard you’ve been asking about me?”

His cheeks burned pink. “I, um… yeah, I—“

You laughed. The sound was music to his ears. “It’s okay. I’m honoured, really. A world famous racing driver is interested in me?”

His eyebrows raised. “You know who I am?” The first time you’d properly met you made no indication of such, so he’d just assumed you didn’t know.

“I might have done my own research,” you shrugged. Not a single part of you seemed embarrassed about it though, not like he had. You were owning up to it, you were outwardly telling him he interested you.

And he knew in that very moment, he was completely hooked.

The first race you attended, not only of the year but ever, was the Miami Grand Prix. Lando insisted it was a good atmosphere, unlike a select few that weren’t always the greatest. It was also warm and there were places he could take you after that he thought you would like. You had no hesitations. All you wanted was to see your boyfriend succeed. You didn’t know all that much about the world of motorsport, but you knew Lando hadn’t won before and seeing it in person would surely be something special.

But he had his doubts. He had qualified 2nd, beside Max, for what felt like the thousandth time. He knew exactly how this would play out. But you didn’t feel like letting him get in his head.

“You’re going to win. You’re such a good driver, Lando. Believe in yourself.” He wished he could have taken your words seriously, but he didn’t have it in him to do so. He had already spent 2 years doing his very best just to get stuck behind the world champ anyway. His hope was burning out the more it happened, it was almost ashes at this point. But even if his hope did disappear, you were there to believe in him on his behalf. It was refreshing to have someone think he could win for once.

“I’ll try.”

You frowned. “If you won’t try for you, try for me?”

Apparently that was all the motivation he didn’t realise he needed. He was going to go out there and win it for you. He couldn’t let the first ever race you attended be one that was forgettable.

And when he crossed the line in P1? Everybody went wild.

While waiting for him to get out of the car, you were almost lost in the sea of papaya surrounding the barriers, but there was no way he would let that happen. He threw himself at his team first and as soon as he pulled off his helmet he was throwing his arms around you.

“You did it! You’re a race winner!” you cheered.

“I’m a race winner!” It felt so good to say. He couldn’t stop grinning. “You must be my good luck charm. Gonna have to come to all my races now.”

Your expression was a mirror of his. “If this is how you’re going to perform at every one, count me in.”

So it had taken him 5 years and a whole lot of time, effort and emotion to get him to that top step of the podium, when all along he had been waiting for the final piece of the puzzle to make it happen; you.

━━━━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━━━━

[forthelostones]

𝚙𝚝.𝚎𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 ; 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚎𝚢𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚗𝚕𝚢 ─── ⋆

⟡⋆˙୨ᥫ᭡. 𝚗𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎 𝚊𝚞 - 𝚌𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚐𝚎!𝚊𝚋𝚋𝚢 𝚡 𝚏𝚎𝚖!𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛ᥫ᭡.୧⋆˙⟡

synopsis: abby was a woman whose presence was becoming deeply irresistible to you. in your final year of nursing school, you toil with the idea of pursuing her — ruin what you have or enjoy what’s in front of you?

warnings. 18+ (mdni); sub!abby, domsub!abby, sexual themes, jealousy, fluff, nickname: dummy, and modern au - pre-established relation.

an: guys. this has been such a crazy ride, thanks for the support on both of my stories. it means so much to me. sorry for the wait... lets get it.

CLICK HERE.

(no y/n)

Abby watched from the row behind you, observing how you chewed on the end of that neon #2 pencil. She could tell by the bobbing of your leg that you were nervous and stuck on a specific question. It was the same during studying — chew, bob, sigh. Almost on cue, a frustrated sigh left your throat. She knew it was her fault that this was happening.

She knew neither of you studied long enough for you to feel confident on this exam. Well, that’s what she kept trying to convince herself, she was already finishing up the last page. Although her pencil glided on the paper effortlessly, she couldn’t help but be distracted by your indecisiveness on the math equations and multiple-choice questions. The once full eraser had been subsided to pure metal scrapping into the pages.

The time on her watch read ten minutes left until the end of the exam and you were only on page two. Studying had become harder for you with Abby around. It wasn’t only the dating component it was mostly the difference in your skills. Her ability to memorize vocabulary and complete math problems without thinking twice about them made you academically insecure. While you averaged low B’s and high C’s, she had a 4.0 and made it look easy. The clock's ticking distracts you from the problem you are trying to solve. It was one you and Abby worked on multiple times, yet you’re frozen, unsure how to solve it. As everyone flicks their pages to finish, you just … froze. 

“Okay. Pencils down.” Your professor said just moments after you started a new equation. Your jaw dropped slightly and you squeezed your eyes shut. Abby shook her head, not at you specifically, but herself. You had practically moved in and the nights that would typically be spent studying were now used to learn more about each other beyond your friendship. Realistically, Abby understood that those moments would be worth more than a grade in the long run. But a part of her also resented getting this comfortable, ultimately impacting you. The feelings clashed within her. The heat forming inside of you could only be described as embarrassment. Why was it like your brain suddenly lost all power to its systems? It wasn’t unusual for you to skip a few questions but this was completely unlike you. 

You chew on your cuticles and fold the mostly blank pages and pass them down to the front, doing the same for your classmates. Their pages crumbled with computation answers and confidently filled bubbles exposed your shortcomings. You should feel relieved that the test is over but you don’t. A heavy anchor grounded you but you were still floating. Abby met you down in your row where you saw her concealing another A-plus smirk. Once you both exited into the hall Abby’s hand finds the center of your back and she begins to pet it slowly. You shrug her away gently. 

“Don’t.” You sigh. 

Abby knew it would set you off but she did it anyway to show you she sees you. The blonde’s brain was moving at a rapid pace. She so deeply wanted to ask you about the challenging problems and the scenarios on the quiz. Her translucent lashes tapped frantically as she imagined the sheet of paper behind her eyes. 

“I feel good about this one.” She finally says. 

“Good. I really did not do well. It’s — whatever. Right?” 

Abby looks to you and she couldn’t lie and tell you that it’s not just whatever. It’s your future. Both of your futures — together — it was important to Abby that her partner was just as successful as her. 

“You should be happy that you did your best but understand that if you did do as bad as you think, it’s worth asking for a makeup to understand the material.” She suggested. 

You hated when she got like this, rigid. Her posture was straight, her mouth set hard, and no softness found anywhere on her face. The regime her father instilled in her stayed and it was evident in moments like this. 

“Abby, sometimes I really need you to just listen to me and be rational later.” 

A chill followed down her spine following your sharp comment. 

“Maybe we shouldn’t study together anymore.” She muttered.

Part of you wanted that to be a joke but knew it wasn’t. The night before proved itself to be deeply uneventful for the both of you. 

“You’re distracting me.” You groan as you’re reviewing flashcards on Abby’s bed, the first mistake. She was wearing a thin, white tank top and a pair of loose black sweats, untied, on her hips. Her hair was drying from the shower you two just took and so was her body. The outline of her features was accentuated by the water being absorbed by the cotton. She was so casually beautiful and simply yours. The bed shifted behind you, her weight bending the mattress inwards, as she crawled towards you.

“Am I?” She asks, using the tip of her tongue to playfully lick a stripe of slick up towards your lobe. An instant bubble of relief popped inside of you. “Okay. Okay.” 

Abby couldn’t take her eyes away from you. She had seen you in this robe every night now but it was something about how it was gliding with you. As well as your skin's glint from your body oil makes you look regal. You sat at the base of the bed while Abby retreated towards the headboard, leg tucked under her butt. She took off three inches of hair and it looked so fresh, carving out her face perfectly, and highlighting her stiff jawline. “How about we make a deal?” She said brazenly. 

“What?” 

“For each answer I get right you remove something?” 

“Abby,” you chuckle, not denying her advances. 

You thumb the index cards in your hand and turn to tie your eyes with hers. 

“First question, the section is Anatomy and Physio. What best describes endocrine glands?” You ask. 

Abby taps her chin as if she’s searching for the answer. “They secrete chemicals into the blood, growth, metabolism, sexual development and function.” 

She raises her eyebrows and shoots her eyes towards your robe. A deal is a deal so you remove the silk, leaving you in your two-piece pajama set. Abby notices the goosebumps lining the outsides of your shoulders and can’t help but desire to rub them warm. 

“Question number two. Anaerobic respiration can lead to a burning sensation caused by which molecule?” 

“Easy,” she scuffed. “Lactic Acid.”

Her teeth appeared behind her Cheshire grin as your top found its way onto her floor. 

“Good job.” 

Your words made her cunt pulse. 

“The mediastinum is located within which cavity?” You ask. 

Abby’s face fell instantly. The outline of your nipples looked delicious and icy, she needed them in her palms immediately. “Fuck. I don’t know.” 

You lift yourself off the bed and bend right in front of her to retrieve your shirt, Abby’s shadow overcame you and her hips thrust into your ass in one motion. She spins you around to face her, mouths inches away. “Do you think you’re going to actually put that back on?” 

Her index finger traced the outline of your lips with her eyes following. You grip her wrist, halting her movements, “And if I do?” 

Abby gently places the index cards neatly on her bedside table and presses you into the wall behind you. Usually, Abby is submissive but the stalking woman imposed her strength on you, like she’s been wanting to do from the first time she saw you in clinicals. 

“I’ll just rip it off you.” She giggles. 

“Would that be so bad?” You reply, bringing her finger into your mouth, sucking it then adding another. Abby huffed a keen groan as she bent down onto her knees, immediately pressing her mouth into your cunt. She lapped at the fabric separating her from you and didn’t even ask for you to remove them. 

You insisted by beginning to take them off but she tore them off you and hoisting up one leg onto her shoulder following the other one. 

“Abby.” You gasp. 

“I got you, hold onto me.” 

She was flexing her skill by fine-tuning your pussy with her tongue while she slowly hoisted you up towards the ceiling. Not only did you feel as if you were floating, you actually were. She was a show off but you fucking loved it. 

After that, there was no more studying done.

“Do you think we should cut down on the time we're spending together?” You question, as the night replays in your mind. 

Abby’s face scrunched up in immediate disapproval without hesitation at the suggestion. She pulled her bottom lip slightly in her mouth and looked around as if the walls suddenly grew eyes. Abby wanted to tell you no but she knew what had to be done. 

“We can.” She grimaced with a shrug. 

Despite all the time you spent together the girlfriend conversation had yet to come up. She thought about it the most when you were in her presence. She didn’t comprehend how you liked her so much and yet, you refused to make it official. She truly believed that once you ditched Ellie she’d be over the moon, but right now it’s feeling the same and Abby doesn’t do stagnant. 

“Abby, we can still study together, in the library, several feet away from each other.” 

She forced a smile. “Fine. Does this mean you’ll still sleepover?” 

Before your crush on Abby developed you were denying yourself the fact that it was possible. But during this time, before the dating, your grades had been the best when you were alone, and you know for a fact, that it was because of her. You may not be as smart as Abby but you do want to come out on the other end with a degree too. 

“Why don’t we come up with a schedule?” She suggests.  

“That would be perfect.” You said. 

The schedule consisted of dinners at Abby’s during the week, sleepovers on non-clinical days which were Wednesdays and Fridays, and studying every day at the library. Abby liked the organization but her body had gotten so used to you beside her. A week into implementing the new schedule Abby felt an immense amount of anxiety without you around. She didn’t know how to break down the feeling and why it was so persistent. Although you two were next door to each other, text messages still provided a temporary cushion for her sadness, but it wasn’t enough. 

Abby clicked the icon that was the home for your name and called but there was no answer. Dinner was stewing on the stove, and in the middle of mixing a cocktail, Abby called to find out if you could taste what was missing. Another call led to another one and soon Abby was sitting with a candle flickering silently in front of her. Your plate sat untouched and she just picked at the remnants of hers. 

Little did she know you were closed off in your room after studying, panicking. You knew yourself more than you wanted to. The schedule was needed for you to clear your brain on the feelings you had for Abby. With upcoming exams and graduation where would that leave you? She'd move across the world while you were huddled up in your small town's hospital circulation? It was coming in so fast and before you could mix in a girlfriend you had to know what you wanted. The pages of your journal turned soft as you tore your pen through the book. 

A part of you wanted to hear the rapping of her fist against your door, ready to envelop you and reassure you that you would figure it out. She never came and because of that, a piece of you died. Conversations with her have turned short and passive since the last exam. It wasn’t just the exam it was a culmination of multiple things that either of you were ready to talk about. 

Abby put your dinner into a glass container and waited outside your door trying to gain the sense to knock. One of the many nights you spent together gave her a reason to knock instead of sulk in her bed, thinking about all of her shortcomings in the relationship. You were both lying down and Abby lit a candle that night that you bought her. The sweet scent of peaches and cream cut through the bitter smell of her pine products. She loved it. Between the sheets were your naked bodies damp and lazy. Abby had brought a glass of cold ice water and set it on the nightstand beside the candle. You took turns taking sips. 

“Thank you for the water.” You smiled. 

“Don’t mention it,” She nudged you. 

You twist your body onto your stomach and look up to her glimmering, post-sex face. 

“Abby?” 

“Yes, beautiful?” 

“You still make me nervous.” 

She cackles and brings her hand to your cheek and massages away your imperfections. With the roll of her eyes she licks her lips before curating a snarky response. But she quickly realizes you’re being serious. “Why?” 

“I care so much about you and that’s something I haven’t felt before. With anyone.”

A kind pause swells between you both. 

“I care about you too. I don’t want that to make you nervous.” She said. 

“I know you see me differently but I am a little insecure.” 

She leans down and kisses your forehead tenderly without a breath. 

“That’s normal.” 

“But I burrow. I distance myself when I get like that and I don’t want to subject you to that. I don’t want to hurt your feelings again. If I do that, get distant, don’t hesitate to just tell me to get out of my own head. It’s not your fault or your responsibility.” 

Abby’s fist banged on the door with your words echoing in her mind. The thuds startled you out of the sleepy daze you fell under. You shuffle to the door to see the goofy blonde in her pajamas and slippers holding what was supposed to be tonights shared dinner. 

“You didn’t come to dinner,” Her voice was more welcoming than usual. “I was worried. Are you okay?”

Shoving her way past you and nearly tossed the container on the kitchen counter. Without hesitation she opened her arms and you couldn’t help but to run into them. Although she didn’t say anything the affirmation from her presence was enough. 

“All too much in your head again aren’t you?” 

A sob escaped into her chest and she gripped you tighter. These past few days have been a blunder of confusing thoughts. A part of you knew getting together with Abby would make things unclear in your life. But if she was willing to get uncomfortable and support you, you were obligated to do the same to her.

“Abby, I should’ve answered your calls.” You pull away to notice how unswayed she is of your state.

“You should have but that doesn’t matter right now. We need to talk.”

You nod your head seldomly and she grips your hand and takes you to your bedroom. Abby pats beside herself to welcome you.

“I’m so scared.” You blurt out.

“Me too,”

Abby was scared for the complete opposite reason. When she was with you it seemed like all the decorative things such as school didn’t matter. She wasn’t familiar with how that felt. To have an identity outside of her accomplishments or care about someone. With you, she could flunk out of nursing school, move back to her home town, and still be satisfied. That scared her — that one person could allow her to have such a paradigm shift.

Hearing Abby say those words made your heart settle.

“I care so much about you. I didn’t think I would, this much. I should’ve known because on orientation when I saw you I thought, ‘I need to know who she is’ and I am grateful for that thought blossoming into my mind.”

You couldn’t muster any other word but her name. She picked up your hands to bring them into her lap. She leaned in to place a soft kiss on your mouth and lingered there with her forehead pressed against yours.

“When you moved next door, I just thought maybe this is the sign I need to do something different. To not let my ambitions lead me but instead my heart. And my heart loves you, Dummy.”

[chilschuck]

I love your writings so much!! I was thinking if you could do some scenarios of tall-man chilchuck and reader

`✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ thank you so so much anon WAHHHH!!! i hope these are okay!! it’s currently almost midnight where i’m at but i wanted to get these out for you!!! us tall-man chil fans gotta have something to eat fr!!! <333

— TALL-MAN!CHILCHUCK: x gn!reader hcs.

꒰ warnings: ꒱ none, sfw + fluffy!!!

꒰ wc: ꒱ 585

✦ hope these are what you were wanting!! if not, feel free to submit another request for more tall-man chil and i will happily oblige!! :D <333

✦ Even though he wasn’t a tall-man for very long, you still found yourself enamored with him in this form. You were already smitten with Chilchuck anyways, but this was something very different to the both of you.

✦ The fact he towered over you like this made your heart beat a little faster, and once he found out his effect on you in that way, you were doomed.

✦ It started with him instead resting his head on top of yours, using his height to his advantage now. Sometimes he’d even pull you to his chest, your back to him, and laugh at the reaction you gave him. You didn’t find his teasing very amusing at first.

✦ Even so, you couldn’t help but wrap your arms around his waist occasionally, nuzzling your head into his own back and causing him to jump slightly. You weren’t going to let any time you had him in this form go to waste, so you spent it giving him even more affection.

✦ Your hand sought his out any chance it could, your fingers intertwining and causing him to look up at you. All you gave him was that cheeky smile and a wink, causing him to grumble. The effect you had on him…

✦ If there was ever a time you took a moment to rest, you’d sit between his legs and just admire him. Holding his hand in yours and comparing the size, studying how broad his chest was, noticing little details like the shape of his chin… Chilchuck’s cheeks were always rosy when you gave him that kind of attention, embarrassed to be doted on like that in front of everyone. (Not that they cared all too much; Marcille was definitely squealing at the moment.)

✦ Chil was always so fun to mess with, especially with him being like this. You couldn’t help but pull him down to your height and place tender and sweet kisses to his cheek, before letting go and walking off like nothing happened. (Oh, that’d get him all flustered for sure.)

“Chil…” You’d whisper, hands behind your back in that innocent way you always did when you were scheming something. Raising a brow at you, he walked over to the sound of his name, waiting for you to continue.

Instead of giving him what he expected, you reached up for his neckwarmer, pulling him down until he was level to you. Before he could pull away, you pressed soft, fleeting kisses to his stubbled cheek. Letting your lips trail along his skin until you reached the corner of his mouth, you abruptly let go of him and walked off. Chilchuck scrambled for something to say, anything at all, but instead watched as you caught up to the others.

You knew just how much you drove him insane.

✦ You were used to protecting him before, but now he still couldn’t do much in this state. More than happy to assist, you’d make sure he stayed safe, while also appreciating just how handsome he was. (You’d give him another wink and he’d yell out for you to stay focused!)

✦ Noticing just how skinny he was, especially like this, you’d try and convince him to eat a little more than usual. All this affection and doting wasn’t unusual in the slightest, but he could tell you were enjoying yourself a little too much like this. Not that he’d ever catch himself saying anything about how he secretly revels in it…

— dividers by @/cafekitsune! <3

[meichenxi]

languages, travel, identity, grief

Maybe some of you have heard of Xu Zhimo's Second Farewell to Cambridge (徐志摩 再別康橋 Translation: Saying Goodbye to Cambridge Again, by Xu Zhimo | East Asia Student). It's an achingly lovely poem about a Chinese scholar who studied in the UK, and how he left so gently, taking nothing with him as he went. It brought me solace over the last year.

I thought for a very long time about how I felt about having to leave China, and what it felt like to mourn for a future that was never going to mine. I cried. How am I supposed to explain why? I'm not Chinese. I've got no family there, or a childhood to look back on. I couldn't explain it even to myself.

That pain was coupled with a type of uncertainty, a discomfort at myself for feeling so strongly. This feeling was not allowed. It meant - what? Something awful, probably. I was a racist, probably. I should hate myself, probably. Fetishization is the word that gets thrown around for white people and their time spent in East Asia at one end of the spectrum - at the other end it's just seen as embarrassing and deeply, you know, cringe. It's a self-interrogation - why do I feel so sad? Why do I feel this pull so strongly anyway, to a country that's not even mine? Why should it matter so much when I leave? I didn't feel like this grief has any sort of legitimacy. But it has taken from September - eight months after leaving - for me to pick up Chinese again.

I felt, for months, hollow and unsettled and drifting from place to place. I opened my textbook, and closed it again. The memories there were too painful. I'm not going to write about why I had to leave, but it wasn't by choice. I had loved the people in the school, even if it was for a short time. When you have no internet and are training eight hours a day, the days are coloured more sharply: bright and hurtful and wonderful all at once. We had no running water. It was in an abandoned hotel. I miss the monk at the temple door opposite the school, always on time at 6am to open it for our classes. I miss the folk at the local shop who invited me to watch films on their projector; once they killed a chicken for us. I miss the woman in the woods who gave me the chestnuts she had picked. I gave the chestnuts to the cook, and we steamed them and ate them by the lake. He wanted me to marry his son; he wanted it so strongly that he brought me pork, and desserts, and gave me paper, and promised me I could have a jade bracelet, that he would buy me a house. I miss the oldest martial arts teacher, who spoke in such strong dialect I could barely understand him. When I was sad and missing home one night, he told me that I should stay after dinner. In the silence and against the cicadas, he started to play the erhu for me. Later, my friend told me that he hadn't know what to say, how to comfort me; I was a foreigner and a young woman, after all. We had very little in common. But nobody has ever played a piece of music for me like that before.

And I miss X, my best friend there and partner in snack-smuggling crime. She is 19 years old, and a janitor's daughter, and one of the wisest people I have ever met. (She also rides an excellent motorbike, and lent me her hanfu, and we sped through the city giddy with our own daring and trying not to be caught.) We got matching haircuts; she had always wanted to cut her hair like a boy, and was too scared to do it alone. When I left, I told her to stay in touch: she shook her head. She said that some people were meant to know each other for some time, and no more. I think the death of friendship by attrition, by - as Elrond said! - the slow decay of time, is one of the saddest things of all. I deleted Wechat. I don't want to read over the old messages. By having this place - her, and the chestnuts, and the cicadas - as a memory, I can tuck it away it. I can keep it close.

I wrote a poem myself on the plane. That was the last I thought about China, the last thought I let myself have, in eight months. I kept myself away from it. It felt like a wound. And against that hollowness, there was constantly the question: Why should I have any right to miss this place? Who I am there? Why does it matter? We are all different people, wherever we go, and whoever we are with; we wear different skins, large or small. In China I was [...]. She was who I was. That name, that I introduced myself to people with - she was bright and friendly and tried to translate things just so. Everybody who goes as the only foreigner to a place - or the only foreigner that speaks the language - is a little bit self-obsessed. It happens. It's unfortunate, and something to guard against. But it also gives you its own kind of identity in a way: your identity is Foreigner. Your identity is a cultural bridge. Everyone you meet, in a country as friendly and curious as China, has questions about you. You stand with your feet in both worlds, and are not really part of either of them. That identity is easy to slip into, like cool water, like trying on new clothes. It's easier that thinking: who am I outside of that? Where am I going? I don't really know. I don't think anyone really does.

And then the second thing happens. I speak Chinese well, by this point. My accent is there, but it's slight. I am short, and have dark hair, and a generally similar build to many East Asians - so the questions I have got in the last few years have changed. Sometimes people think I have been raised here. Sometimes they think I am ethnically Russian, and nationally Chinese. Sometimes I get asked if I am half Chinese. Usually they know I am a Foreigner, 100% white - but not always. There is a peculiar rush that comes from that acceptance; from feeling the relief, just for fifteen minutes, that you belong. It's not about 'passing', or race-bending, or anything twisted - it's nothing so unnerving as that. It's just the human need to belong. Everyone gets tired of being stared at, after a while. And after a while, you start to think - I wish I understood. I wish they understood. I wish this were easy.

But then the conversation keeps going. You don't know a local word, or you misunderstand. You say something in a strange way, or you make a strange gesture, and the glass shatters, and - there you are again, naked again, exhausted again, explaining yourself again. That's the other half of it. There's solace in the Foreigner identity, because that means that's all you are. You don't have to think about your parents, or whether they worry about you so far from home; of course they do. The Foreigner is good and filial and a wonderful daughter. You can craft her into any shape you like. But it also marks you out again and again, endlessly and again, as Other.

There was a paper published a while ago that showed measures of acceptance of non-natives in native-speaking communities. It highlights a strange, but familiar experience to those who have lived abroad - the people who spoke the language to a medium level felt more accepted and less lonely than those that spoke the language to a high degree. It makes sense, and mirrors what I have found with both Chinese and German. When you speak a little Chinese, you are a wonder - a curiousity! Look at the Western girl go! People are kind, and curious, and will slow down to include you in conversations. You are thrilled with what you can access - all this knowledge, that other people don't have! Look how special you are!

And then you get better. And then you realise, cut by cut, that you will never be one of them. You don't want to be Chinese, per se; but you do want to be accepted. You are happy to be British; but you miss China like a wound, an old one, festering, even when it was never yours. How do you tell your family that you are not grieving a lost romance, a beautiful girl, but a language and a life? That there are words of majesty, of playfulness, that will never be yours? You speak well enough that people no longer bother to dumb things down, or explain them; you sit with your discomfort, smile painted on, because - you know. It's not bad. You understand most of it. And on the edge of that circle, smiling uncertainly, following the vast majority of what is being said, you are not clever enough and not witty enough to keep up with the chengyu, the cultural references, the slang, and the raucous laughter around you erupts, and you don't know what you've missed, and everybody says - she's quiet, that one. Maybe all the foreigners are? And all you are doing is sitting and feeling the distance between You and Them as heavy and as stifled in your chest as an ocean of dark.

So you go back. Back to your people. But when you sit with the other foreigners, you are apart. They laugh; what are these nutters doing? The Chinese don't make any sense. The Chinese do this - they do that. You sit there, and then there is a pressure building in your chest too, a discomfort, the desire to stand up and say - well, actually.

You are responsible for everything the Chinese teachers do, and have to explain things in a way that the students understand - Confucian thought, and Buddhist philosophy, translated in pithy bite-size adages for the West. You have no qualifications for this; everything you assert, you feel unsure. Uncertain. Someone else could explain it better, more nuanced, and you need to do more reading anyway - but here you are, and here they are, and you're the only one. And you do know. Not enough, but enough that their jokes, their pains, make you uncomfortable. You feel the need to defend both parties; to be a diplomat, every second of every day. In turn, when the students come to the teachers with problems, you have to translate their grievances in a way that the Chinese teachers will be sympathetic towards. Once I got asked: why do you never join us after class? Why are you always so quiet when you're not working? As a translator, you are always working. Every time you speak, you are working; what you choose to say, and what you choose to not say, and where you choose to intervene. You are building relationships, and disappearing, and you are becoming invisible, and you're a nothing, and you're everyone and you're nobody and nobody realises you are doing anything more than translating at all.

I wanted to stay. I couldn't have stayed. I wanted to be accepted as one of them. I wanted to be accepted for who I was. That means a foreigner. I wanted to be true to myself, which means that I would always be the Foreigner, which means I would always be apart from them. It is that contrast and juxtaposition which causes the grief. And there was never an ending to it, a resolution, a chance to reconcile myself (in China) with myself (in the UK), because all at once I had to leave. The grief comes most from the second arrow - not the pain of leaving, but the bewilderment of not knowing why I was in pain at all.

It's been eight months. Slowly, as spring comes, I feel like I am on surer ground. I can look at my old books, those painstaking notes, and I could look at new ones too and I'm starting to think, because this is what I tell my students, and maybe there's some truth in it - it's okay if you're not perfect. It's okay if you didn't achieve what you wanted to, and that the language - in its wholeness, and who can ever know that? - will never, not quite, be yours. It's the struggle and the process that means that I will know and understand Chinese in a different way, in my own way, in a slanted-to-reality sort of way, that is a treasure in and of itself. There is beauty in its brokenness too.

And there is sorrow, too. The sorrow that comes with easing yourself into a different life, and it holding you gently for a while. I sat there - I spoke to them. It's not only missing a place; it's missing a person you were, a stage of your life, for a time. It's knowing that a place has reached inside your ribs and taken root there - even if you don't return, you can never fully get rid of that again. You are two people now, with feet straddling two oceans. There are parts of you that loved and suffered and hated and grew in Chinese, not English. You can't explain that. You can't even begin. Sometimes - not often - you are a stranger in your own land. The poets spoke of that. In the age of fast travel, of the weekend break, we have forgotten the ways a place can burrow itself inside you, and find its own home.

It's not the same as the grief that someone Chinese will face. But it's still grief. I have put my life into Chinese. Maybe that is all it takes to grow love.

Now, I turn back to Chinese - as a foreigner, as Melissa, as myself. It's a bittersweet thing. I know that I cannot hold all of it. It will spill out, like the sun, and there is no way I can be that without losing myself and my history and my own green woods. But I think I am ready now. I am surer, and a little steadier on my feet.

[akookminsupporter]

What if this travel show debunks whole Jikook ? Imagine Jimin saying 'it's been long since we slept together in same room' 'it's been long since I heard his snoring' or something? If they are a couple they'll be sleeping together right ? Why would Jimin say that ? Well, it's kinda debunked already because Jimin said 'I got used to your snoring because we spent time together few days before aka their travel show shoot'. He only got used to it now because he had to sleep with JK for a schedule ? Also they are acting like Jimin bumping JK in sleep is a funny moment as if it never happened before. RM asked a question like that too 'did you elbowed him this time' as the last time it happened was when they together for NYC schedule.

Anon, I have several questions in response to your rather silly message. Why does it bother you that people like me think that perhaps there's something more than just friendship between Jimin and Jungkook? Why does it bother you to acknowledge, understand, accept that Jimin and Jungkook have always been close, probably the closest in the group? Unless you're a tkkr, it doesn't make much sense, or is it simply homophobia? Though I suppose it's not that simple. Or is it the parasocial relationship you have with one of them? What's the reason?

You clearly aren't a true fan because a real fan wouldn't be desperate to confirm that two members of their favorite group aren't or weren't close. That they had problems, etc. But you know what's funniest about all this? Your argument falls apart with the simple fact that Jimin and Jungkook enlisted together and not only that, but they applied to a program that guarantees they'll be together throughout their military service. That doesn't prove they're a couple, but it does confirm how close they are and that their relationship is different. And I know that that fact, that reality, eats away at you and at everyone who thinks like you. And I also know that you're terrified of seeing or knowing what they filmed before their military service. People like you, cowards like you who hide behind a screen and the option of anonymity, are embarrassing because it's obvious how empty and sad your lives are and that the only thing that makes you feel... something is being a horrible person.

[callumsgirl]

ONE SHOT

midnight summer

or: the first time Gale realizes that he has romantic and mostly sexual feelings for John they're still in fighter school. It just takes one summer night, laying outside in the gras, looking at the stars and Bucky telling him a story with his low, husikily voice. That's all Gale needs to allow his heart and mind to opens up for his feelings and when Bucky come closer and kiss him there is no holding back anymore.

(pre-war Buck and Bucky)

Fighterschool US Air Force, a warm midsummer night...

The week was finally over. Gale sighed in quiet exhaustion and slumped back on his elbows, the soft, lukewarm grass touching his legs and lower back. It was August and although the sun had long since disappeared over the horizon, there was still a pleasant warmth in the air and the crickets were chirping in the distance. It was still overwhelming to sit on the wing of a B-17 and watch the sunset. Watching the sky slowly turn yellow-orange and then deep pink and red was simply unforgettable. Gale loved those balmy summer evenings when they weren't flying and he had the time to sit alone on a wing - in between all the hustle and bustle of the day - and write in his leather-covered notebook and think about John and home as the sun went down.

He felt heated and the longer he sat in the grass, the more the tiredness continued to fight its way to the surface. Gale had been awake since 0500 and had had several hours of theory lessons, sports and a flying session. His muscles burned with exhaustion and the dull feeling of contentment spread through his chest as he finally leaned back completely until he lay flat on his back in the grass and closed his eyes. He could lay here forever, he thought and smiled.

Somewhere in the distance he heard the mingled voices and laughter of some guys. They were all sitting together around the campfire, telling stories. Basically, they all got on well, and yet at the end of the day it was one big tussle, like a motley family. Each of them wanted to be the best pilot - and some days it was Buck and Bucky, others it was some guys from another squadron. 

"Are you awake?" John asked in a raspy voice and Gale hummed softly as he felt Bucky drop into the soft grass beside him. John was so close to him that he could feel his body heat and smell his unique scent. He took a deep breath and inhaled the heady mixture of soap, aftershave and John. Hmm, heavenly.

Gale grumbled and opened his eyes a crack when he felt John press his knee against Gale's: "Hmmm, what's up, John?"

"I miss girls...god damn I miss their soft curves...and losing myself in them. Do you ever think about girls, Buck?", Bucky murmured in a low, raspy voice, sending a shiver down Gale's arms. His heartbeat quickened and, with his eyelids still half open, he blinked and felt himself blushing. Bent in the darkness, he was glad John couldn't see his embarrassment, even if he knew John knew. He knew Gale pretty well - probably better than he knew himself. That wasn't just because of the countless hours they'd spent together in the cockpit, but also because of the time they'd spent together besides flying.

While John had always been the loud, outspoken type, Gale had tended to hold back on such topics of conversation. Talking about his bedtime stories had never occurred to him before, but John would tease a few details out of him now and again. He usually embarrassed Buck, but at the same time he felt safe with John.

Gale remembered the first lukewarm evening they had spent here at the air base and to his surprise Bucky had started talking about women, their beautiful curves and their soft lips. He had remained silent, blushing and staring at the tips of his feet and then later into the campfire, while the other blokes had talked loudly and laughed about their conquests and sex. It had made Buck uncomfortable. Partly because he wasn't the loud type and partly because he realised how much less experience he had in all these things. So much less experience than John and when later that evening, on the way back to their lodgings building, he had held him by the elbow and forced him to slow his steps, his heart had almost stopped. 

Bucky's fingertips had brushed over the curve of his elbow and, slightly drunk, Bucky had grinned at him so irresistibly and curiously at the same time. His voice was hoarse and almost lost in the darkness, but Gale had heard his words perfectly. 

"Why were you so quiet tonight, Cleven? Don't you like talking about women?"

Gale had swallowed hard and shaken his head gently. He felt heat flush his face again and his cheeks turn red as he murmured softly and a little hesitantly, "It's just not my way to talk about women, John. Besides, you talk enough for both of us."

"There's some truth to that," Bucky laughed and Gale smiled slightly. "But you've had girls at home, right?" he chuckled, almost tripping over his feet. Just in time, Gale wrapped an arm around John's waist and pulled him close to the side of his own body. The moment Bucky's warm, minty, slightly wiskey-scented breath brushed his cheek and he blinked at him under half-closed eyelids, Gale knew that John was slowly becoming more than just a friend to him. 

When Gale hesitated and didn't answer the question directly, John pressed himself half a step closer to his body and lifted an arm to cup his palm around the back of his neck. It wasn't the first time John had come so close to him physically and yet it felt so different, more intense and somewhere more intimate than ever before. Buck swallowed hard and moistened his lips with the tip of his tongue as he looked expectantly and a little nervously into Bucky's blue eyes. He watched the corners of John's mouth twitch softly and playfully before he murmured, "Or am I completely off base and you're still a virgin, Buck?"

He widened his eyes slightly and shook his head. What, he thought angrily. Gale may have been quieter and less extroverted than John and a lot of the other blokes, but he wasn't really a prude. He just wanted sex to mean something to him.

"No," Gale mumbled and his arm, still wrapped around Bucky's hips, tensed slightly. "I've had girls at home, but I'm just not the type of guy to fuck around without a care in the world." His words spilled from his lips without another moment's thought. He sounded more biting than he had intended and then pressed his lips together. But luckily for him, John only chuckled again and moved a little closer. So close that John's lips were now brushing the shell of his ear and Gale inevitably held his breath. "Your words almost hurt me, Buck...if you weren't so damn beautiful and important to me."

"You're drunk, Bucky. Let me take you to bed." Teasingly, he'd tried to deflect the attention away from himself and thank God John had been drunk and relaxed because he'd dropped the subject and they'd walked the rest of the way quietly side by side. 

Buck hesitated for a moment as he was thrown back to the present by the memory.

"Buck, do you ever think about girls?" John repeated quietly.

He blinked and frowned slightly as confusing thoughts collided in his head and he felt slightly dizzy. One of them made him pause and he thought first of Marge - his beautiful Marge. Her soft blonde hair, her delicate features and her warmth and kindness. His best friend from childhood was truly beautiful and yet, apart from her, he had hardly thought about women in the last few moments. Gale licked his lips and opened his mouth slightly to respond. But instead he pressed his lips together once more, swallowed hard and cleared his throat before trying again.

"Yeah, sometimes I think about Marge," he replied slowly.

His heart pounded in his throat and he closed his eyes again. His cheeks burned too much and he bit down hard on his lower lip to keep his next words to himself: But I'm thinking of you too, John.

"Marge," John repeated thoughtfully. "The great Marge," he added, and again his knee bumped against Gale's. The corner of Buck's mouth twitched a little and he sighed. A little louder this time and he rubbed his right palm flat across his chest. Hoping to dispel the tingling in his chest, he rubbed sometimes harder, sometimes lighter across his torso. But it didn't help. No amount of rubbing with his palm, no amount of deep breathing, no amount of sighing dispelled the urgent heat and the tingling that ran through his veins when John was near him. He'd first really noticed it when Bucky had fallen asleep next to him in bed one night last month - a little drunk and so incredibly relaxed and beautiful that Gale had stared at him half the night. It wasn't until the next morning that he'd realized what he'd done...and what it might have meant. 

At first he had pushed it to the back of his mind, but then - a few days later - when the memory didn't go away - he dredged it up again and wrote a letter to Marge. She was his closest friend and the only one who had noticed in his first letter about basic training and Fighter School that there was something different and special about John Egan. 

Maybe it was because of the way Gale had expressed himself a few months ago. Or maybe it was how often he talked or wrote about Bucky...or maybe Marge was just too damn smart and knew him too well. 

Gale had only grinned and shaken his head wildly when Marge's letter had arrived, and even now, as it was beginning to dawn on him, her words still sounded too loud and somehow too strange in his head, and at the same time he wanted nothing more than to find out what John was all about.

"What do you think about Marge?"

Gale winced slightly as Bucky's voice snapped him out of his own thoughts and back to reality. He opened his eyes and turned his head slightly to the side to observe John's side profile. His fingertips twitched and he wished he could reach out and touch him. But he suppressed the urge and whispered instead, "That I miss her voice and the way she laughs. Do I really have to tell you what it's like to miss someone, Major?" Gale grinned slightly and this time it was he who pressed his knee lightly against John's. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the corner of Bucky's mouth twitch and the next moment he turned his head towards Gale and looked deep into his eyes.

"Did you ever imagine being more than just her friend, Gale? I mean look at her...she's beautiful." John's usually bright eyes glittered ocean blue and dark in the embracing darkness of the night, somehow promising, and Gale felt his body temperature rise.

Buck frowned and faster than he could realize it, he mumbled, "No, not really."

John laughed and the husky vibration rushed through Gale's entire body like a shiver. Then John turned his head to Buck and licked his lips with a grin. "I just don't understand you, Gale. You don't drink, you don't gamble, you don't bet. You don't even want that beautiful young woman, so what does it take to convince you?", Bucky murmured in a hoarse voice and Gale watched every movement of John's body. He leaned back in the grass now too, turning on his side and resting his head on the side of his palm. They were closer now and Gale closed his eyes momentarily as a new wave of John's scent wafted over to him.

"Currently I' dont really know what I want", he lied. "I know I should love Marge like a lover and not like just a friend, but it is what it is, Bucky."

John stared at him for a few breaths before he lifted his hand and stroked his chin. "I suspected you were deep, Cleven, but really that romantic, huh? Are you really looking for the one woman worth writing to in war?" he teased him in a low voice. 

Even though the words hit him like an unexpected punch in the gut, the corners of Gale's mouth twitched and John's fingertips brushed his lower lip. They both inhaled and exhaled loudly, staring at each other...and then it was over. Still, their eyes remained locked together, and when Buck opened his mouth slightly and whispered, Bucky's heart skipped a beat in his chest. "Who says I'm dying to write to a woman? Maybe I just want to write to you, Bucky."

There was a vulnerability in his words that squeezed all the air out of Buck's lungs. His chest suddenly tightened so much that the gentle teasing of Gale's words was completely drowned out, leaving only seriousness and profundity instead. He leaned forward a little, curving his hand fully around Buck's chin now and forcing him to look gently but firmly into his eyes. Despite the darkness, John caught a glimpse of Gale's deep red cheeks and in that moment he was sure he had never seen anything more real and beautiful. "What would you write to me like that, huh?" he whispered playfully and only with the last bit of restraint did he manage not to let his thumb brush Buck's full, pink lower lip. "After all, you'll be seeing me every day for a while."

"I just want to write down everything that happens to us. I want to be able to remember everything...to remember us," Gale confessed and as he realised the meaning of his words, John's eyes widened. With his heart pounding, Gale closed his mouth again and when he tried to avert his gaze from Bucky, he shook his head almost imperceptibly.

"Don't," he whispered and Gale felt his fingertips twitch on his chin. "Why do you want to look away?" he asked quietly. "It's romantic and maybe the wrong thing to say, but you can always be honest with me, Buck. I've got you and even though you may have thought it was bullshit when I said to you a few weeks ago that I'd always catch you and be your safe haven here, I'm here for you." Without really noticing the movement, John's thumb traced the outline of Gale's lower lip and they both caught their breath. Gale clasped John's wrist with one hand, and when he expected to be pushed away, Buck hesitantly pressed closer into the touch. 

"Always?", Gale asked huskily. 

"Yeah, always", Bucky answered. "No matter what you need I give it to you."

Kiss me, Gale pleaded silently, blinking several times before looking back up at Bucky and into the blue waves of his eyes. "I know you'll always catch me. Bucky."

"There'll be two more planes in the sky at the end...if there's one thing I'm sure of, it'll be you and me, Buck," John whispered. "No matter what this war costs us, we'll get through it together," John promised.

"You can't really promise that," Gale mumbled hoarsely. They both knew it was an empty promise and yet it gave them both so much warmth and security, hope and confidence that everything would be all right in the end, that at that moment it almost didn't matter. 

John leaned his forehead against Gale's and a few breaths passed in which they both just lay there in the grass and time seemed to stand still. 

Gale was the first to clear his throat and breathed in a hoarse voice: "John?"

"Hmmm," he mumbled, slowly opening his eyes as he lifted his head slightly. Gale was lying half under him, his eyes still closed and his full, pink lips - so seductive and kissable - that John could hardly resist the urge to lean down and find out what Buck tasted like. Instead of kissing him, John memorised every detail of Gale. His unruly blond hair, the long lashes, his beautiful, seductive lips and the curve of his cheekbones and jaw. 

"I just meant it," Gale whispered after a while. John frowned in confusion for a moment, not knowing exactly what Buck meant, but before he could ask, Buck whispered, "That I want to write you letters." 

Buck opened his eyes, blinking, and when their eyes met again in the darkness, the air suddenly crackled between them. They were so close that Gale didn't know if it was static energy in the air or if it was their two heartbeats making the air crackle. He exhaled audibly and this time John didn't hold back. No, his thumbnail grazed Buck's jaw and traced its outline. Gale's eyes fluttered shut again and he sighed softly as John's thumb stroked his lower lip. 

"What are you doing?" Gale breathed, his heartbeat skipping a beat or two as a wave of heat rippled through his body.

"I'm looking at you, Cleven," Bucky murmured, making Gale laugh. "You really are the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

"Don't say that," Buck asked with a sigh. "You got all those girls..."

"What if I told you I only have them to distract me."

"Distract you from what?" muttered Gale, heart pounding. 

"From wanting you," Bucky murmured, leaning his forehead against Gale's again. He stopped breathing for a few seconds, then his chest began to heave and he sucked the air in and out greedily. His fingers clutched John's wrist so tightly that he was afraid of leaving marks. So he loosened his grip and stroked from his wrist up his forearm and upper arm until Gale could bury his hand in John's neck. "Don't say things like that if you're not serious. It'll kill me."

"Then I guess it's best I tell you again...I want you, Buck. Since day one you've just been blowing my mind and hearing you talk about Marge...god you really want to torture me."

Gale opened his eyes and for the first time in his life he was sure that something was really going right. "It wasn't my intention to torture you," Gale confessed. "But I had to say something...you kept talking about all the girls."

"I know..." John sighed, again tracing the curve of Gale's lower lip. Their eyes still held onto each other and as their breaths both mingled, Bucky mumbled, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay...," Gale breathed, leaning further into the gentle touch of Bucky's thumb on his lips, "I'm sorry. 

"Is that really what you want?" Bucky murmured softly and Gale nodded slightly before he even realised it. 

"You said you'd give me anything I wanted...and I want you."

Bucky's grinned and lowered his lips to Gale's. At first their kiss was slow and uncertain, then it became more aroused and curious until John leaned fully over Gale and pressed his hips against his. They were both breathing heavily and when a dark moan escaped Bucky, Gale intensified their kiss and licked John's lips with his tongue. He begged for entrance and as John's mouth opened, their tongues began an erotic dance that fuelled them both.

While Gale buried one hand in Bucky's soft brown curls, he placed the other on the spot between his neck and collarbone. John's pulse raced under his fingers and when their kiss ended, they were both breathless and completely aroused. The air crackled with the tension between them and when John pressed another brief kiss to Gale's lips, he smiled. "So that's it now...", Buck murmured in a husky voice. "We're doing this together now?"

"Yeah, you're not getting rid of me any time soon."

Hey FELLAS ❤️

I felt the need to write another one shot about our two Majors. I've been thinking a lot about the pre-war time when Buck and Bucky where still in fighter school and that back in the States everything started. Back in fighter school they both of them realizes that there is a invisible bound between of them and it's more than friendship or camaraderie. It's deeper and I wanted to write something about the first time they kiss and touch each other. Explore new desires and feelings, and I could just scream because I really love them! 🫢

Enjoy this one and please LMK what you're thinking! I love to read your comments! ❤️

xoxo callumsgirl

[nileart]

this started as a "I think ichi should dual class as a hero and a magical girl" joke but it got out of hand so uhm. arakawa family magical girl au noone asked for.

[krisget-thebanana]

Oopsies my hand slipped and I drew this

[qeyond]

You're my safe house.

[waterlogged-detective]

🍁, 🌺, and/or 🌾

Criminally Soft Asks

🌾 Describe your OC through the eyes of someone absolutely head-over-heels in love with them

I have another ask where Imma do this one because it's gonna be more jokeish lol so I'll skip it this time

🍁 Where does your OC go when they need to have some time to themself? Would they ever have their own “comfort corner” filled with all the things they like? Do they have a favourite spot outside that feels like its theirs and theirs alone?

He has a study that is DEFINITELY NOT FILLED WITH STOLEN BOOKS don't snitch and a little desk with a patchwork armchair to work at. I suppose that's sort of a comfort corner? It has a small fireplace to brew tea, and both Nebbie and Boots' beds (although Boots often just plods into Doe and Darcy's bed because he knows he wont be kicked out).

🌺 What does your OC do to calm down when they’re scared or after a nightmare? Do they have any special comfort items or need to be reassured by a specific person? How do they handle this if they’re alone?

Oh man this is sort of a boring answer but Doe doesn't really get scared by nightmares in the way I think the prompt means. Like sure he's scared in the moment. Maybe? But he isn't scared after. He's more "huh that was kinda neat" and then forgets about it.

See Doe doesn't really experience emotions in the same way a human would. He's books. Just words. And if one of the books he's made of...doesn't tackle the emotion in it then it's not really something he can quantify for himself in the feelings department.

Existential dread and a vague terror of the infinite? 100%

Scared at specific things that are quantifiable? That he can observe? Not really.

The only reason he has that feeling at all is due to one specific book that was in his little birth trunk, a lot of the rest were romantic or academic. History or science or facts about surface beetles. Having a banned dictionary stitched into the fabric of your suit doesn't help much beyond giving you a definition of a word.

He does, however, feel ennui, thanks to the same specific book, and when he does he tends to isolate himself in his little study, where he locks the doors, closes the windows, and curls up on his armchair until he feels better. Sometimes he brings Boots or Nebbie for emotional support because their heads are empty and they're quiet. He'd do the same if fear was more of an issue for him, I'd imagine.

[asordidbarwere]

gggggggg

[falled-over]

i recently watched the madmen episode where timeline wise MLK was just assassinated and hey they didn’t handle it well

[waterrtribe]

i keep trying to imagine what the smallville writers room was like and what they were thinking when it came to certain decisions, particularly lana's character arc.

(this is long im so sorry i dont know where it all came from)

so okay. they're writing this show about superman's origins, and they're plotting out where the characters will end up, and since it's technically a prequel, they already know how each main character's story is going to end: clark will become superman, lex will become his nemesis, and lana is going to be his ex-girlfriend.

they clearly wrote clark and lex's relationship with the intention of reaching those endings. they knew and we knew that clark and lex would eventually fall out and lex would become a villain. they foreshadowed it constantly, even as early as season 1. and with each new season they showed clark and lex's relationship deteriorate and lex's character regress just a little bit more. sure, there was a little back and forth here and there where they tried to repair their friendship but overall, it was a pretty steady decline. there was never truly a question of whether lex could turn himself around, even if we wanted him to. especially after first two or three seasons, that became pretty clear. it seemed like the writers knew that they were writing a tragedy when it came to clark and lex (there were so many references to julius caesar and hamlet and other classic tragedies lmao).

i think that's why i liked it so much - the tragedy of it all, where you find yourself hoping for a different ending despite knowing that ultimately it will end badly, is what makes it so compelling to watch. it's effective because they make you hope for a happy ending before taking it away.

so what i don't get is, why did they drag out clark and lana's relationship and frame them with the Will They, Won't They trope, when they know and we know that They Won't? why didn't they instead let their relationship reach its natural conclusion and let lana's character grow and progress past their terrible relationship? why didn't they approach this story as a tragedy in the same way they approached clark's other major relationship on the show (outside of the one with his parents) -- his relationship with lex?

like their constant back and forth was already annoying to watch, but even more so when you know that they're ultimately going to break up and none of it will really matter. they Could have made it matter to us emotionally by writing an actual compelling romance that we would be sad to see end like they did with clark and lex's friendship, but they didn't. when they finally end things eight (!!! kill me!!!) whole seasons in, i didn't feel any sadness or loss, i just felt so relieved (especially because those episodes in season 8 were just so bad overall lmao). i just thought, oh finally. thank god.

it's just that part of the reason the writing of lana's character is so frustrating to me is because there were so many places to take it, since they basically put No effort into developing her as an individual, (and i personally believed she was headed to a darker place character-wise and i have a whole story idea for how it could've happened but i'm already rambling too much), but i could never see what little potential she had actually lead Anywhere because they kept dragging her back to the same terrible relationship repeatedly and there was never any satisfying conclusion for her and i just find that so Aggravating

anyway, considering that she's like the third main character on the show, i just think they did her a huge disservice

[katnissgirlsmakedo]

very cold outside now. maybe time to break out the ole peacoat… hashtag henry mills core

[scoreplings]

also helpful for remembering that my ex is a shithead im better off not having in my life is the fact that whenever i tell anyone how our relationship ended theyre horrified by the way he acted.