#IT’S WONDERFUL IT’S AWFUL I LOVE IT I WILL NEVER RECOVER | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

harrysfolklore · 3 months

Note

Could you do an insta blurb with Anna Paul as a face claim? <33

never give up - ln4

my first lando blurb !! i was really excited to write for him so let me know your thoughts about this or send requests !

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

liked by landonorris, georgerussell63 and 4,836 others

yourinstagram starting the job of my dreams tomorrow 😭😭😭😭 see you soon bahrain 🏁

view all 190 comments

username1 omg congratulations ma friend !! ♥︎ by author

username2 all of those years of watching race cars finally paid off ♥︎ by author

↳ yourinstagram now i’m going to be making tiktoks for them HOW IS LIFE REAL

username3 PLEASE FEED US WITH GOOD CONTENT

↳ yourinstagram your wish is my command 🫡🫡🫡

maxverstappen1 Please don’t make us do any kind of dance… ♥︎ by author

↳ maxfan1 HES ALREADY COMPLAINING HELP

↳ yourinstagram you don’t make that decision sir

username3 i believe in the f1 fan to working to f1 pipeline now

oscarpiastri Hello new best friend ♥︎ by author

↳ yourinstagram HI BESTIEEEEE

↳ oscarfan1 counting on the oscar content

landonorris Welcome abroad 🥰 ♥︎ by author

↳ landofan1 whats with that emoji landoeeee

↳ yourinstagram i’m readyyyy

liked by yourinstagram, pierregasly and 338,504 others

lando.jpg touchdown in bahrain. @yourinstagram forced me to try matcha (awful experience)

view all 1,368 comments

landofan1 HE REMEMBERED THIS ACCOUT WE CHEER

oscarpiastri You’re a matcha girl at heart

↳ yourinstagram you’re so right my dearest pastry

↳ oscarfan1 LOVE THEM

landofan2 not lando being a matcha hater 😭

landofan3 yn in the last picture she’s so cuuuute

username1 lando posting a picture of yn 👀 i bet they’re dating

↳ landofan1 you must be new here lando posts literally everyone

maxverstappen1 I spot a Redbull jacket, thank you for picking favorites already @yourinstagram

↳ yourinstagram don’t flatter yourself okay. and tell checo i need both of you for rapid fire questions asap

↳ charles_leclerc I’m getting her ferrari red stuff soon

↳ lando.jpg she’s papaya heart, sorry losers

↳ username2 HEEELP😭

username3 looks like all the drivers get along with yn it’s so fun to see

georgerussell63 Why did you steal YN I needed to run something by her

↳ yourinstagram if by that you mean you need to know which one of your memes is going viral rn, check your messages

↳ username4 PLEASEEEEE 😭

username5 this comment section feels like a gc with all of them and i love it

liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 20,736 others

yourinstagram tifosi for jeddah. let’s gooo @/charles_leclerc, @/olliebearman ❤️ and sending big hugs to mr smooth operator @/carlossainz55, hope you recover sooooonnn

view all 466 comments

username1 SLAYYYY

charlesfan1 YAAS YN IS ON OUR SIDEEE

username2 such a cool jacket omg ♥︎ by author

scuderiaferrari We’re all Tifosi at heart 🙌

↳ yourinstagram love you ferrari admin

landofan1 i know lando won’t be happy

olliebearman Love you 🫶🫶🫶 ♥︎ by author

↳ username1 AWEEEE OLLIE

iamrebeccad 😍 ♥︎ by author

alexandrasaintmleux Ferrari girls >>> 🥰 ♥︎ by author

↳ charlesfan1 i love the ferrari wags sm

landofan2 lando complaining in 3..2..1

landonorris It’s always tifosi or gives you wings but never papaya

↳ oscarpiastri Ouch

↳ yourinstagram top cry babies of the grid: the mclaren boys

↳ landofan1 😭😭😭😭😭

↳ danielricciardo Can you blame them? They’re like 7 ♥︎ by author, georgerussell63, maxverstappen1, carlossainz55

↳ landonorris Can’t hear the haters

maxverstappen1 And who got double podium?

↳ yourinstagram you’re so annoying omg

↳ maxfan1 HEEEELP

liked by yourinstagram, landofan1 and 58,624 others

f1gossip Lando Norris enjoys Australia with mystery woman ahead of the Grand Prix this weekend

view all 409 comments

landofan1 HEEELP

landofan2 my brother in christ that’s yn

username1 mystery woman 😂😂 @/yourinstagram

landofan3 iconic duo

landofan4 i’m going to say what everyone is thinking: i ship them

↳ landofan1 HEEEELP

username2 we need the teaaaaaaa

yourinstagram i wonder who could that be ♥︎ landonorris

↳ username1 so mysterious

yourinstagram why does this look like i’m showing you receipts of something shady that you did @landonorris

↳ landonorris You look so done with my lies lol

↳ landofan2 WHAT ARE YALL DOING HERE

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris and 49,846 others

yourinstagram AND THAT'S A WIN FOR THE SMOOTH OPERATOR AFTER THE OPERATION ‼️ congratulations carlitosss, don't let the papaya fool you, i was rooting for you

view all 422 comments

username1 LETS GOOO

username2 this is such a cool picture ♥︎ by author

mclaren Our papaya heart just broke 💔

↳ yourinstagram NOOOOO

scuderiaferrari FORZA FERRARI ❤️

↳ yourinstagram YAAAS

username3 she really has the coolest job in the world

landofan1 lando finally made her wear papaya 😭 ♥︎ by author

landonorris I was in the podium too, you know?

↳ charles_leclerc Me too

↳ yourinstagram did you win?

↳ landofan2 CLOCK THEM

iamrebeccad 😍😍😍 ♥︎ by author

lilyzneimer Beautyyy

↳ yourinstagram PICTURE CREDITS TO BABY LILY !!

carlossainz55 The smooth operation 💪 ♥︎ by author

↳ landonorris I'm getting my apendix removed

↳ yourinstagram DO NOT

liked by yourinstagram, danielricciardo and 689,462 others

landonorris australia was nice :)

view all 3,045 comments

landofan1 BABYYYYY

landofan2 LANDOOOO THE LAST PIC

username1 yn what are you doing here

carlossainz55 Why don't you post a picture of my win?

↳ landofan1 😭😭😭

↳ yourinstagram bc i'm prettier ♥︎ by author

oscarpiastri Australia: the best country in the world

↳ yourinstagram you're australia's treasure 👐

landofan3 POSTING YN??? ON MAIN??

↳ landofan1 bestiesss

↳ landofan2 i had to double check this was actually his main

username2 he's in love with yn

georgerussell33 crushcrushcrush

↳ username1 he's so strange

yourinstagram i like being each other's personal photographers

↳ landofan1 SOOOO YN TOOK LANDO'S PICS

↳ landofan3 they're in love

liked by yourinstagram, oscarpiastri and 632,099 others

landonorris i didn't get that podium but i did get you some spam

view all 3,102 comments

landofan1 BOYFRIEND MATERIAL

username1 when will lando nowins ends

landofan2 YN AGAIN?????

mclaren 🧡

danielricciardo Is this a YN fan account? ♥︎ by author

↳ yourinstagram IT SO IS RIGHT

↳ landonorris Can't hear the haters

username2 it's so obvious that those two are in a relationship

↳ landofan1 don't be weird they're friends and yn kinda works for them

↳ landofan2 to be fair yn doesn't really work for the drivers, she works for the f1 pr team

carlossainz55 👀

↳ landofan1 WHAT DO YOU KNOW

yourinstagram thank you for the night walk and the pic buddyyyy ♥︎ by author

↳ landofan1 NOT BUDDY HELP

↳ username1 even i felt hurt by that friendzone

↳ landofan2 lando was found crying

liked by olliebearman, landonorris and 58,264 others

yourinstagram one moth living the dream life while having the dream job 🥺 let’s go shangai 🇨🇳

view all 501 comments

username1 im so jealous rn

username2 teach me your ways

lewishamilton 🖤 ♥︎ by author

maxfan1 REDBULL JACKET SLAY

landofan1 lando crying over the redbull gear soon

username3 traveling the world befriending the drivers and getting free merch this is really THE DREAM ♥︎ by author

lilyzneimer 💙 the bestttt!

↳ yourinstagram i literally lysm baby lily

↳ oscarpiastri Stop stealing my girlfriend from me thank you

↳ yourinstagram the mclaren boys being cry babies, exhibit B

alex_albon Why am I missing from the third pic?

↳ georgerussell63 We we’re gossiping about you ♥︎ by author, oscarpiastri, landonorris, lewishamilton, maxverstappen1

↳ yourinstagram exactly

username4 how does it feel to live my dream

maxverstappen1 Great great jacket

↳ landonorris i’m burning it

↳ landofan1 HEEEELP 😭

landonorris Best season so far 🫶🫶🫶 ♥︎ by author

↳ landofan2 LANDOOOOOO????

↳ landofan3 he’s down bad awe

liked by landonorris, yourinstagram and 159,635 others

mclaren A very special guest joins the papaya garage today 🧡 #MiamiGP

tagged: yourinstagram

view all 7,937 comments

landofan1 AHHHHH

username1 WAG vibes

landofan2 since when does lando have access to the mclaren acc

username2 she looks amazing

lilyzneimer 🫶🫶🫶

↳ mclaren Our other fave 🙌

↳ landofan2 mclaren hyping their wags up so trueeeee

redbullracing Give her back

↳ username1 the girls are fighting

↳ mclaren Never

landonorris 😍😍😍😍 ♥︎ by yourinstagram

↳ landofan1 CONTROL IT

↳ landofan2 JUST KISS HER YOU FOOL

yourinstagram GO PAPAYA BOYS 🧡🧡

↳ landonorris boy*

↳ oscarpiastri Cry cry cry

↳ landofan3 IM YELLING 😭😭😭

liked by yourinstagram, danielricciardo and 3,122,342 others

landonorris WWE FUCKING DID IT. P1 🏆

view all 49,687 comments

landofan1 IM STILL SOBBING WTF

landofan2 HE DID IT LITTLE LANDO NORRIS DID ITTTT

oscarpiastri Well done man 👏👏👏 ♥︎ by author

alex_albon Congrats!!! 💪👏 ♥︎ by author

mclaren PROUD 🧡🧡🧡

username1 this man is going to party like an animal tonight

landofan3 whoever or whatever put a fire on his ass to win THANK YOU

maxverstappen1 You had a great motivation to win. Congrats 👏 ♥︎ by author

↳ username2 HUUUUUH

lewishamilton WELL DONE ♥︎ by author

yourinstagram IM STILL CRYING 😭😭😭

↳ maxverstappen1 Because now you’ll have to go out with him? THIS COMMENT IS NO LONGER AVAILABLE

↳ landofan1 MAX WTF WE ALL SAW THAT

yourinstagram CONGRATULATIONS LAN 🧡🧡🧡 ♥︎ by author

↳ landofan2 when the camera focused on her after lando crossed the line 😩😩 my delusional ass is living

↳ username1 these two will be a thing before the season ends

↳ landonorris My good luck charm ❤️

↳ landofan3 LANDO DONT DO THIS TO ME

liked by landofan1, landofan2 and 16,936 others

f1gossip Lando Norris get cozy with mysterious woman after Miami GP win

view all 209 comments

landofan1 OMFGGGG

landofan2 CAUGHT IN 4K

username1 who is thissssss

landofan3 IF THIS IS NOT YN I DONT WANT IT

username2 wbk he’s always wildinggggg

landofan4 guys i think this is yn???? she posted stories celebrating with lando

↳ landofan1 omg i don’t want to be delusional

↳ landofan2 AND REMEMBER MAX DELETED COMMENT ????

landofan5 can somebody from the grid spill the beans about his

↳ landofan1 george where are you ?????

liked by yourinstagram, pierregasly and 1,390,180 others

landonorris I’ll remember this forever. Thank you everyone ❤️

view all 10,252 comments

landofan1 AHHHH

landofan2 THE SECOND PIC HELLO????

mclaren We always believed in you 🧡

landofan3 THATS LITERALLY YN IN THE SECOND PIC

oscarpiastri I bet this was your favorite weekend ever ♥︎ by author

↳ landofan1 WHAT DO YOU KNOW

georgerussell63 You finally convinced her?

↳ landonorris And did

↳ landofan2 WTF LET ME IN???? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

landofan4 LANYN IS REAL 😭😭😭😭

username1 yn is no better than me i would also fall for lando norris

landofan5 SEE YN WAS THE GIRL WITH HIM IN MIAMI

lewishamilton Did I miss something?

↳ georgerussell63 If you only checked your phone

↳ username2 HEEEELP

landofan6 SO THIS IS SO YN 😭 i really hope they’re together

maxverstappen1 Two things you had been waiting for: the win and the girl ♥︎ by author

↳ maxfan1 MAX HAS NO FILTER I CANT

↳ landofan1 SO THEY’RE TOGETHER

↳ landonorris 🥰

yourinstagram 🧡 ♥︎ by author

↳ username1 THATS ALL??? GIRL ADRESS THE RUMORS

↳ landofan1 GIVE US SOMETHING

liked by landonorris, pierregasly and 76,398 others

yourinstagram imola, monaco, montreal 🤍

view all 503 comments

username1 forever jealous of your life

landofan1 A LOT OF LANDO HERE OMGGG

username2 the second pic, is she dating anyone? 👀

↳ landofan2 lando so true

georgerussell63 You're welcome for the Hello Kitty face mask ♥︎ by author

↳ username1 OF COURSE george would have hello kitty face masks

↳ yourinstagram thank u georgie

landofan3 this is basically a lando appreciation post ♥︎ by author

username3 i sense a soft launch

landofan4 landoyn is sooooo alive

mclaren Our favorite 🧡

lilyzneimer 🤩 ♥︎ by author

oscarpiastri Thank you for the tiktok tips?

↳ yourinstagram you think those were for free? you owe me dinner

maxverstappen1 Why there is no Redbull on this collage?

↳ yourinstagram you and checo have been pissing me off lately

↳ maxfan1 HEEEEELP

scuderiaferrari Some red in sight ❤️

↳ yourinstagram as it should

landonorris so pretty 😍 ♥︎ by author

↳ yourinstagram you talking about yourself?

↳ landonorris nope 😍

↳ landofan1 STOOOOOOOP THIS

liked by daniel3.jpg, yourinstagram and 348,922 others

lando.jpg happy :)

view all 5,039 comments

landofan1 AHHHHHH

landofan2 I JUMPED FROM MY SPOT

username1 wbk they're together

oscaspiastri Cuties

oscarpiastri Lily wrote the previous comment, not me

↳ oscarfan1 HEEEEELP

↳ yourisntagram this is why she's my favorite

landofan3 THIS REALLY CONFIRMS THEY'RE TOGETHER

username3 what if they're not together and everyone is just clowning 😭😭

carlossainz55 I've been replaced

↳ landofan1 HEEEELP

↳ landofan2 CARLANDO FOREVER

yourinstagram 🧡 ♥︎ by author

↳ username1 stop it with the orange hearts SAY SOMETHING

liked by landonorris, olliebearman and 103,827 others

yourinstagram paps hard launched us before i could do it, but here’s our official instagram debut i guess 🧡

view all 2,099 comments

username1 AHHH FINALLY

username2 you've come a long way girl, from fan to working for f1 to dating a driver ♥︎ by author

landofan1 I KNEW ITTT I KNEW ITT

georgerussell63 We had been plotting this since you first met, btw ♥︎ by landonorris, oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1

↳ yourinstagram nosy bitches !!

↳ username1 HEEEEELP 😭

mclaren OUR PRAYERS HAD BEEN ANSWERED 🤩🤩🧡

↳ landofan2 the mclaren admin is soooo me

↳ yourinstagram stop mclaren admin im blushing

username3 slayest couple of the paddock already

oscarpiastri What happened to "my job comes first"?

↳ landonorris Mate do you want her to break up with me or something

↳ landofan1 😭😭😭😭

lilyzneimer Papaya girls stick together 💕 ♥︎ by author

↳ username1 queens of mclaren

↳ alexandrasaintmleux :(((

↳ yourinstagram i literally lysm alex

landonorris my girl my girl my girl my girl ❤️ ♥︎ by author

↳ maxverstappen1 We get it

↳ landonorris you're jealous bc she'll never wear redbull anymore

↳ yourinstagram 🥴🥴

liked by yourinstagram, charles_leclerc and 1,092,388 others

landonorris Never back down never what? Never give up

view all 15,390 comments

landofan1 YELLING

landofan2 I CANTTTT

username1 i want what they have

olliebearman ❤️

mclaren Our parents 🧡

↳ landofan1 its me im actually the mclaren admin

danielricciardo YN blink twice if you need help

↳ georgerussell63 She just did I'm next to her

↳ landonorris Can't hear the haters

↳ landofan2 😭😭😭

username2 i need yn's manifestation methods

landofan4 THE HAND PLACEMENTS ???? LANDO' SMILE ?????

maxverstappen1 Poor girl

↳ maxfan1 LEAVE HIM ALONEEE

carlossainz55 My biggest condolences @/yourinstagram

↳ landofan1 they grid has one mission today and that is to attack lando

yourinstagram 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍 ♥︎ by author

yourinstagtam leave my baby alone assholes @/danielricciardo @/georgerussell63 @/maxverstappen1 @/carlossainz55

↳ carlossainz55 Don't baby him even more

↳ georgerussell63 cAnT hEar ThE hAtErS

↳ landonorris my girl my girl 😍

2K notes · View notes

ceruark · 2 months

Text

eat your heart out

synopsis: you’re a vampire just trying to get by via feeding on your friends, having no desire to find a mate. sunday has other plans. notes: yan! sunday x vampire! gn! reader. (yan! aventurine if you squint) words: 3,396 notes: modern au. vampires are fully integrated into society. cw: yandere themes: obsessive and possessive behavior, stalking, drugging. not nsfw but definitely a bit horny, my bad. a/n: apparently the key to overcoming writer’s block is having a really questionable dream

“Come on.”

“Aven, I said no.”

“Just one bite?”

“No. I’m not hungry.” You shove his face away from your arm, but he just rests his head on your shoulder in response. You roll your eyes in annoyance. “Besides, you’ve had vodka. Your blood probably tastes like shit right now.”

The blonde scoffs at you. “It’s not my fault you have an awful alcohol palate.”

You glare at him, offended. “Wine is one of the only things I can tolerate. It’s not my fault you don’t have a more refined taste.”

Aventurine heaves a loud sigh and pouts, but drops the topic.

It’s common knowledge that, as a vampire, you need to drink blood regularly to sustain yourself. After much trial and error, you found that you can get by just fine feeding only twice a week. Thankfully, your friends don’t harbor any fear toward you and are more than willing to let you drink from them. You always feel bad for leaving such a painful mark on their wrists, but they wave away your worries, insisting that it’s not much to put up with so long as you’re fed and healthy. You’re grateful for all of them and will take what you can get, even if you have developed a particular taste for Black Swan’s and Ratio’s blood— and Aventurine’s, when he isn’t drinking that godawful liquor.

Others of your kind often tell you that it would be easier and more beneficial for you to find a mate. Drinking from a single person would mean that you could feed more frequently, and the consistency of drinking the same blood would make you stronger, and overall healthier. You’re reluctant to tell your friends that drinking blood of various types and quality leaves you feeling more lethargic than could be considered normal. They would react poorly to that information, and the alternative is something you don’t want to do— not in the near future, and maybe not ever.

The thought of being bound to one person until they die leaves you nauseous; you’d seen how well that worked out for your parents. Becoming accustomed and addicted to a single person’s blood is a tricky thing, and your father’s withdrawal symptoms had been brutal for decades. For a long time, doctors believed he would never fully recover.

So you always brush away anyone who approaches you with the intent of becoming your mate, insisting you aren’t interested and you don't need one.

Aventurine seems to be gunning for that position, anyway. He has a habit of clinging to you and flaunting his neck around you, wearing accessories that bring attention to it or leaving it completely barren while wearing a low-cut top. His intentions couldn’t be more obvious, but you refuse to acknowledge them; you love him dearly, but not enough to shatter your fear of taking in a mate.

You’re pulled out of your thoughts when the bartender finally places your order in front of you: a glass of classic red wine. You perk up as they bow to you. “Apologies for the wait, we’re quite busy tonight.”

You shake your head in dismissal. You were wondering why it was taking so long to pour a simple glass of wine, but you suppose some things can’t be helped.

“No worries,” you respond with a grin. The bartender watches as you raise the glass to your lips and take your first sip, and leaves once you hum in satisfaction and go back for more.

You remain at ease for a while longer, sipping at your drink and enjoying conversation with your dear friend (who ends up ordering another drink with vodka in it, how disgusting). The two of you are in the middle of an argument about who in your shared friend group would survive in a zombie apocalypse when someone settles into the empty seat on the other side of you.

“Having a nice night?”

You nearly jump out of your skin at the sudden voice sounding next to you. You manage to catch the way Aventurine’s fond gaze morphs into a heated glare, the way his laughter breaks off and his genuine smile twists into that of a bitter one.

“Sunday,” he says in greeting, though the name rolls off his tongue with loathing.

Said man’s sharp golden eyes flick to Aventurine briefly, meeting the glare with one of his own, before looking back to you. You repress a shudder and greet him with a tight smile.

Sunday Oak, world-famous actor and esteemed son of the distinguished director Gopher Wood, has an interest in you that you haven’t been able to shake. Mr. Wood had picked up a screenplay you wrote, and you were ecstatic to hear that he wanted to meet with you to further discuss your vision for the film. The movie the two of you crafted together was a massive success, and Mr. Wood quickly snatched you up, not wanting to lose your talent to another agency. He’d seen something in you— “a keen eye,” he’d said— and decided to keep you around as his assistant.

Needless to say, you were in no position to treat Sunday with anything but respect, even if he did unnerve you. The two of you met in Halovian Entertainment’s main office during a major company meeting; as the heir to the man’s fortune, he was always at his father’s side, but as his assistant, you now had a place on Mr. Wood’s other side. You two are frequently around each other, and the more you speak to him, the more he seems to pop up in your life, even in places he shouldn’t be. He has a way of conveniently being in the right place at the right time, always lending a hand when you’re struggling to carry heavy equipment, or running through lines and providing an actor’s perspective when you’ve hit a roadblock while writing a script.

He’s always showing up when you’ve gone just a few days longer than usual without feeding, standing closer to you than he usually does. He’ll linger nearby, and the normally graceful and composed actor will somehow manage to gain a small wound that causes him to bleed and fills the air with a scent you can just barely resist.

You considered him a good friend at first. You might still be taken with him if you hadn’t long since figured out that he’s trying to sink his claws into you by getting you to sink your fangs into him. His demeanor is sweet, and his blood smells even sweeter— but you know better than to bite into the apple that the devil tempts you with.

Tonight, he’s decided to crash your weekly meet-up with your friends and sit beside you at the bar. He’s wearing a sheer white top that hangs lowly around his chest, leaving his pale, unblemished neck and collarbones as yours for the taking. Aventurine eyes his outfit choice with disdain, and had this been anyone else sitting with you two, you would have called him out on his hypocrisy; the black off-the-shoulder top he’s wearing shamelessly leaves everything on glorious display.

You turn your head to face Sunday— maybe a little too fast, given the way the room seems to spin a little. You blink rapidly, trying to pull yourself together against the fuzziness in your head.

“It’s nice of you to join us,” you say pleasantly, trying to smooth your smile into something less forced.

Sunday returns your smile, before shaking his head. “I wish I could join you on more friendly terms, but I do have unfortunate news.”

You straighten up, a bit alarmed. “What is it?”

“It seems teenage drama is more serious than we thought. Yanqing and Yunli are unwilling to continue to work with each other.” He sighs. “They’re both demanding that the other drop the film.”

You stare at him incredulously. “We’re already halfway through filming.”

“Yes,” Sunday says, sounding as tired as you already feel. His eyes flit to Aventurine, before looking back to you. “I’ve already discussed potential solutions with my father, but we shouldn’t go over them in… mixed company.”

As an actor under a different agency, Aventurine shouldn’t be around for a conversation like this. He narrows his eyes, giving Sunday another strained smile. “Certainly you can discuss it another time then, yes?”

“It’s an urgent matter,” Sunday answers easily. “If we have to recast and reshoot, we should have this sorted out as soon as possible.”

The blonde is about to fire off another snarky response, but pauses when you place a hand on his shoulder. “He’s right, we need to get this figured out.” You squeeze his shoulder. “Why don’t you go and make sure Veritas hasn’t killed Boothill over poker? They both left the bar pretty drunk.”

Aventurine eyes Sunday warily, then looks back to you. “Fine.” He drops his voice to a whisper, “But you come find us if he tries anything, alright?”

“He won’t,” you whisper back, “I’ll be fine.”

He clearly doesn’t believe you, but he stands to leave anyway. He flicks Sunday a cool look before turning his back on the two of you, wandering away from the bar and toward the casino.

You turn back to Sunday, ignoring the way your head starts swimming again. You suck in an unsteady breath. You feel hot all over, burning like a million needles are pricking at your skin. You glance at your empty wine glass with concern— alcohol never hits you this hard.

You clear your throat, putting your discomfort on the backburner for now. “So what did your father say?”

Sunday hums, propping his arm up against the counter and resting his chin in the palm of his hand. “There aren’t many teenage actors with the skill to replace either of them, and those with the availability are under IPC contract.”

Your eyes go wide. Halovian Entertainment and the IPC don’t mix well, under any circumstances. “He’s not seriously considering extending the casting call to them, is he? The media will be a nightmare if we do that.”

Sunday opens his mouth to respond, then pauses. He takes a sweeping gaze of the crowd around them, too close for comfort. “Perhaps it would be wise to take this conversation elsewhere.”

You nod in agreement, rising to your feet—

—and immediately go crashing toward the floor.

The burning intensifies once you’re standing, and if it was swimming before, then the room is somersaulting now. You let out a cry of distress as you flail, your hands attempting to catch onto the counter or your chair as your legs give out beneath you. One hand feebly latches onto the counter, but slips off of it. Before you can hit the ground, Sunday rushes to your side and wraps an arm around your waist, steadying you against him.

“Are you alright?” He asks, voice dripping with concern and something else you can’t quite place.

“Something—” You cut yourself off, surprised at the way you slur your words. “Something’s wrong.”

Sunday’s face comes into view. His brows are drawn as he clicks his tongue at you. “Did you have too much to drink?”

“No.” You shake your head, and immediately regret it. “Alcohol doesn’t affect me much.”

He frowns more at that. “Might you be getting sick?” He presses his hand to your head, feeling for your temperature. At the contact, your stomach roils, painfully contracting within you.

With horror, you realize it’s hunger. You fed yesterday— you shouldn’t start feeling hungry for at least a few days, nevermind feeling like you’re starving.

You tremble as he withdraws his hand. Your fangs poke at your tongue in your mouth, presenting themselves against your will. Standing this close to you, Sunday’s scent is too strong, and you feel your resolve hanging on by a singular thread.

“You’re running a fever.” He leans in closer, and you clench your jaw. “Do you want me to take you back to your hotel room?”

You don’t trust yourself to open your mouth right now. You shake your head, then move to separate yourself from him. You need to find your friends, any of them, and you need to do it now. But the second you manage to slip out of his grasp, you’re unsteady again, sent tumbling to the ground.

Sunday quickly catches you by the arm before you can fall and pulls you back toward him. The arm around your waist is firm this time.

“Please,” he says, sounding stressed, maybe even a bit desperate. “Let me walk you back. You can’t make it back in this state.”

You want to talk, want to tell him that no, he doesn’t need to escort you back— in fact, you’d rather him take you to one of your friends. But you can’t, not with the way your hunger overrides your brain and leaves you salivating. You can only bring yourself to nod slowly. Once he dumps you in your room, you can call Aventurine up and feed all you like.

The walk to the elevator is agonizing, but the ride up to the thirteenth floor is even worse. At least near the bar, you could distract yourself by catching bits and pieces of the patrons’ conversations, or by staring at the lights of the machines at the casino.

In the small and confined space with no lights or sounds— just you and Sunday— it’s much harder to ignore the roaring of your stomach. Unconsciously, the hand you have settled on his hip to steady yourself tightens, your nails digging harshly into his shirt and leaving crescent marks in his flesh.

He looks at you again, eyes shining in what seems to be anticipation. You would notice it if you didn’t have your gaze resolutely fixed to your feet. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

You nod again, still refusing to open your mouth.

The doors slide open, and somewhere in your hunger-induced haze you manage to feel relief at the sight of your hotel door. You reach into your pocket and produce the key card. Sunday takes it from you and opens the door, holding you every step of the way until he can set you down gently on the bed.

Once you’re seated, you use every ounce of strength you have left to say, “You can go now.” Your voice is strained from the effort of holding yourself back.

“I don’t feel comfortable leaving you alone like this,” he says, and you grit your teeth at his words. “You’re clearly ill. I don’t want to risk things getting worse with no one around.”

“I’ll be fine,” you mutter as you close your eyes. He needs to leave, and soon, or you’re going to lose your mind.

His hand is against your head again, and you jerk away from his touch, clenching your hands into fists to ground yourself.

“At least let me take your temperature,” he pleads. “The first aid kids have medicine that will help with the fever.”

“Fine,” you concede, and he sets off to the bathroom.

His return is indicated by the bed dipping beside you and the sound of the first aid kit being rummaged through. You feel the press of the thermometer against your forehead, and then hear a beeping sound go off.

“102,” he says, sighing. “I’m going to give you some Tylenol, alright?”

You nod weakly. You sincerely doubt the medication will help with your particular ailment. You hear the packaging being ripped open, and for a long moment there’s nothing else.

And then, you smell it: the metallic, unmistakable scent of blood.

Your eyes fly open, pupils blown wide as they lock onto Sunday. He’s pricked himself on the needle in the first aid kit, and a small bead of blood sits on the end of his index finger.

Were you in your right mind, you might have been able to piece it together: the way the bartender watched you as you drank the wine, the way Sunday was in the right place at the right time again, and the way he holds the needle in a way that makes the injury look more purposeful rather than accidental. But such a train of thought has no chance of departing when your blood is roaring in your ears and your carnal instincts take over.

In an instant, you're lunging at him. One of your hands grips the side of his neck and the other settles on his hip again. You push him onto the mattress, using your body weight and enhanced strength to pin him down.

Your lips brush momentarily against the soft skin of his neck before you open your mouth wide and bite into him.

Sunday lets out a soft groan as your fangs pierce his neck. Your fangs hold no venom yet he finds himself going still, paralyzed from pleasure. Despite the stabbing sensation, he cranes his neck and presses it against your lips as much as he can, trying to make access to his blood even easier for you. In a haze of his own, he reaches up and tangles one of his hands into your hair, placing the other on the small of your back and pulling you into him even more.

His blood is sweet against your tongue— sweet like syrup, as sweet as he is to you. You’re past the amount of blood you need to drink to be sustained, but you persist in drinking, indulging yourself just this once. You need more, taking in such big gulps of it that it spills out of the sides of your lips and dribbles down your chin.

You move lower, trailing tiny bites down his neck until you bite down firmly into his shoulder, taking as much as you please. He breathes shallowly and moans at every nip and bite, but he makes no move to push you away. If anything, he only holds you tighter against him.

He trails a hand down your back, and a coherent part of your mind registers that his hold on you has gone slack. Suddenly, an urgency to stop manages to cut through the fog still lingering in your mind. If you drink anymore than you already have, you’re going to leave him weak and seriously injured.

You detach your fangs from his shoulder and peel yourself off of him. He gazes up at you through half-lidded eyes, desire evident and overflowing in his gaze. His hair is a mess from the rough way you handled him while keeping him pinned down. His chest rises and falls with the ragged breaths he takes now that you’ve stopped, drawing your attention to the blood smeared along his neck and shoulder, staining his white shirt beautifully. He reaches for your hand, delicately placing his own on top of it.

Coming to your senses, you pull your hand back as though you’ve been burned. And you have, in a sense— the realization of the night’s events and what he’d done to you hits you all at once. You pivot backward, scrambling away from him until your back slams harshly into the bed’s headboard.

Surprisingly, Sunday follows you, using the last of his strength to rise and move across the bed to sit at your side. He wraps his arm around you and pulls you against him. You curl in on yourself, turning your face toward the wall and away from him.

You can feel the haze already starting to pull at the corners of your mind. Whatever he drugged you with is still in your system, and it’s only a matter of time before you’re hungry again.

In a quiet voice, barely above a whisper, you ask, “Why did you do this?”

You can feel him hum where your back is pressed against his chest, then you feel his fingers settle on your chin. He coaxes you into looking at him, grasping your face gently and slowly turning it toward him.

The affection in his eyes makes your stomach turn. With what, you do not know.

“I thought it might be nice if you wanted me as much as I want you.”

He moves his hand to cup your face and pulls you toward him. He presses his lips against yours, relishing in the taste of his blood on your lips.

#yandere hsr x reader #yandere hsr #yandere honkai star rail #yandere honkai star rail x reader #yandere x reader #yandere sunday x reader #hsr x reader #hsr sunday x reader #honkai star rail x reader #sunday x reader #ceru.writes #ceru.yan #this fic came to me in a vision

470 notes · View notes

poetsblvd · 4 months

Text

SKINCARE BABE ꪆৎ CL16

“How do you not get confused at all?” Charles mumbles in awe of your skincare collection, staring at the jars and tubes of different sizes that sit prettily in organised containers on the large vanity of your bathroom.

You shrug, pulling him lightly by his knuckles towards a seat facing your bathroom mirror. “You get used to it, now sit!”

He smiles softly taking a seat on the cushioned stool next to yours, nodding as you pull out an array of different types of face masks to try with him.

“I have so many fun ones we can do! There’s this clay mask, this gel one, that’s a sheet mask, and then this one peels off.” A delicately manicured finger pulls out the containers and thin boxes from cabinets and lays them down in front of him.

He doesn’t quite know what you’re saying at all, the words mostly fly over his head and he doesn’t understand much of what you’re saying, except that maybe the world has far too many face masks to choose from, but he knows he can listen to you prattle on for hours on end about sheet masks, gel under eye patches, everything really, and never tire.

You hum in concentration, still looking through drawers for anything you may be missing to show him, completely unaware of your boyfriends’ attention being solely on you rather than your skincare.

“You’re so beautiful, you know?” He murmurs smiling up at you.

Your hands pause in their movements, a pretty flush creeping up your cheeks and down your neck, only endearing you more to him.

His hands come to rub at his chest unconsciously still staring at you in awe, a soft gooey feeling coating him turning his eyes into hearts and making his brain go almost numb.

‘’Tellement jolie.” He smiles, large hands carefully sliding around your waist and pulling you closer to stand in front of him, chin resting on the pretty pink silk robe that coats your body. ( so pretty )

“Mon belle amour, comment ai-je eu autant de chance?” He wonders, laughing softly when your hands bashfully come up to cover your face, french glossy nails shining in the light. ( my beautiful love, how did i get so lucky? )

“Charlie!” You whine, dragging out his name in exasperation mumbling a shy I love you, that’s incredibly well received if his ear splitting grin and giggle are anything to go by.

He tugs you onto his lap, making sure you’re comfortable, hands still woven tightly around your waist, his head in the crook of your neck, he smears a soft kiss on your shoulders and nudges you to the face masks again.

“Tell me what face mask you like the most mon beau.” You pull out a small glass pot labeled ‘volcanic clay mask’ and he fights all his inner questions down when you start rattling off its benefits of how it minimises pores and helps target fine lines?

“Okay amour, will you put it on for me?” He smiles cheesily, pushing his face forward and turning you around in his hold.

“We have to push your hair back first love.” You pull out a brand new headband from the drawer next to you and present it to him, grinning at his loud bark of laughter at the lightning mcqueen skincare headband in front of of him.

“Oh my God!”

“You like it?” You question, happiness bubbling inside you.

Nodding eagerly he lets you slip it onto his head and push back his hair “Love it! Love you, so much, Je t’aime mon coeur.”

“Je t’aime aussi Cha.”

“Wow, I am going to be the coolest in the paddock, Lightning mcqueen headband? Max is going to be so jealous.”

love note , hi i hope you guys liked this!! i’m not the most pleased with this but i had the teeniest crumb of inspo to write and it’s 4:20 am (again) so please bear with me!! but i found the idea cute and i was struggling to put it into words, but it is what it is! also i have a bunch of reqs in my inbox that i promos i’ll get to, but i’m recovering from the most disgusting flu and have the most awful writers block, so we’ll go slow and steady!! anyways happy reading mwah xx

#౨ৎ my works #✧. charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #max verstappen x reader #f1 x reader #charles leclerc x y/n #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc x fem!oc #charles leclerc blurbs #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc blurb #charles leclerc drabble #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc one shot #charles leclerc imagines #charles leclerc fic #charles leclerc x female reader #f1 imagines #f1 x y/n

454 notes · View notes

colourstreakgryffin · 7 months

Note

Sorry if this is spoiler-ish!! ;-; But can I request a scenario where the reader, who’s married to Alastor, is having a nightmare where she loses Alastor? This can be after the battle where she almost witnessed Alastor get killed and it haunts her still. Of course with some comfort from the Radio Demon himself at the end :’3

Not spoilerish! I’ve watched the Adam V Alastor fight in full detail and I ABSOLUTELY LOVVEEE this idea! You’re a legit genius, my dear! Thank you so much! Have a wonderful day! First we had big bro Al, then Dad Al, then BF Al, then best friend Al and now, we have best one: husband Al!

Alastor- Staying Here

It’s been happening nonstop for days… days. Weeks. You can’t sleep like this. Every night, the same nightmare but formatted differently like being tortured over and over again but with a different method. It’s almost like that awful angel has re-manifested and is getting back revenge on Alastor by submitting you to night terrors that have been destroying your sleep schedule

Waking up with a nasty shrill of fear and a cold layer of sweat, your body flung upwards with your eyes shooting open after such a terrible dream, tears welling up in them… your beloved husband, Alastor, slept right next to you with his tall deer-like ears twitching. Knowing that he’s still here and not erased by the head exterminator, Adam is such a relief. Especially since that same Angel, Adam himself, is the reason you’ve been having daily nightmares about a violent and gorey erasure scenario of Alastor with Adam. Adam laughing manically, killing off your husband in the most bloody and ruthless way, wounds all over his body, the radio effects dying out…

It’s awful. You can barely sleep and it’s making you deprived of just a single good night

Sobbing under your breath, right next to your seven year husband. Alastor’s ears twitch once more but this time, as a sign to wake up as well for his peacefully unconscious brain. Yawning and stretching out with a long drawn-out radio glitch in literally no time, his broad body sitting up with you leant over and sobbing into your hands. His crimson eyes looked over to you after a bit longer of waking himself up and just like that, he went from wondering what happened to immediately concerned

“Darling… what’s wrong?”

Alastor asks soft and sweet, his radio voice overtone has completely disappeared so his own organic voice is the only thing remaining. He didn’t even get a chance to speak again since you immediately clung onto him and buried your face into his chest, sobbing and crying for him to never leave you. Alastor doesn’t know what’s wrong but he won’t just let his beloved wife suffer

You legit have to sob and hiccup through your words, telling him about every detail of your repetitive nightmares and Alastor’s body tenses up in pure disgust and malice, mainly towards the idea of being erased by Adam, the now long dead head exterminator. He wouldn’t let him put his hands on himself or you, he loves you way too much. Alastor rubs his hands through your hair, letting you cry into his chest until you finally get over it

You need to cry out your fear and feelings until you can be rational and logical to think. Get the emotions out first

Alastor silently waits for you to come back to him, gently pressing your body together with his, one hand on your back to trace through soft shapes and the other stroking gentle brushes through your hair until you can finally just melt in his embrace, calm down and feel safer with your still very alive husband. Yeah, he was quite close to being erased but he escaped and he has recovered from his injury

“My dear, my love. How long has this been going on?” The guilt to lying and not telling Alastor sooner is already eating your heart apart. You just felt too shy to even drop him a hint about your midnight distress since you always assumed he is already too busy with the Hazbin Hotel to be able to prioritise your minor problems. Your nightmare issue isn’t actually a minor problem at all, that’s what you think but Alastor can see, clear as crystal, that this constant nightmare over him thing is breaking your psyche

“S-since it happened…” Alastor’s eyes widen in shock. You’ve been dealing with nightmares on the daily for two weeks?! How did he not even notice?! God, he is so pissed off at himself and just keeps rocking you, gently laying you down and cuddling you, continuing to massaging rubs of your big menacing hands. The wedding band over his left ring finger rubs on the silky thin fabric of your pyjamas and he can feel the wedding band on your own left ring finger clinging onto him like your hands clinging on his waist

Alastor continues to speak, not remaining silent since it may end up making you believe you’re mad at him for staying silent. He isn’t as mad as his body may seem, he is just worried sick for your health and your mental health over these constant nightmares that are driving a wedge inbetween your sleep schedule. His lips drop down and kisses your forehead, keeping up the sweet, caring and loving tone

His husband tone

“Darling, dearest. I am not mad at you, just embrace me and recover. I’ll make those night terrors go away” Alastor continues to comfort you, soft, quiet and sweet. His soft peppery kisses all over your silky-skinned face, your rosy cheeks. Anything to make those streaming tears halt and your now red puffy demonic eyes. He loves you and he has been neglecting this very serious issue. It’s now his job, as your loyal longtime husband, to take care of you

How grateful you are that Alastor is always right next to you and the nightmares you deal with will never be reality. He’s safe, you’re safe and he is going to be holding your hand through your recovery process

“Would you like to go out and get some fresh air with me?”

600 notes · View notes

flametrashiraarchive · 1 year

Note

Hey👋🏾 ! Can I request Shinjuro x Widowed Reader who lost her husband and child to a demon attack years ago and is now remarried to Shinjuro after after Ruka passed. And how Shinjuro deals with being in love with another partner while also being in love with his late wife still grieving her after all these years. Also I’d wonder how Kyojuro and Senjuro would take to having a new mom🤔.

Hey! Thank you so much for the prompt!

So, this story ran away with itself, but I think this had to be a longer piece because there are so many emotions at play here. I wrote this as if the events of Mugen Train never happened and Shinjuro never had that moment of clarity after Kyojuro's death. (Kyojuro will never die on my watch)

If you prefer, it's on AO3 here

Content warnings for: alcoholism, recovering from alcoholism, death of a spouse, death of a child, and Shinjuro just being awful at the beginning of the story. It is kind of a slow-burn but there is an explicit sex scene so minors DNI.

A Rekindled Flame

Shinjuro Rengoku x F!Reader

Shinjuro curls his lip as you approach. "What do you want now?"

Your husband reeks of sake and stale sweat, his yukata falling open, exposing his broad chest and thick thighs to the neighbors as he sits on the porch.

Enough is enough.

You hold your breath, "You know what I want. I've asked you every day since the day we got married; I want you to give up the drink and be a father to your sons. Kyojuro left for his mission brokenhearted."

"So?"

"So… what if he doesn't come back?"

"Why should I care? He's a grown man. He can make his own damn mistakes."

"You're vile. You're shameful!" You were raising your voice to him now, which you never did. You would take shit from Shinjuro all day long, but when it came to the boys, you would defend them tooth and claw. Your fists coiled at your sides. "How dare you!"

Shinjuro's shock at hearing your raised voice buys you a second to snatch the sake bottle from the former flame hashira.

"Give that back!" He growls, trying to stand. He sways and stumbles back down. "I'm not finished."

You defiantly pour the alcohol onto the earth and hand him the empty bottle. "There. You're done."

He simply stares at you, too drunk to form a reaction. "You… my…"

You turn on your heel and walk back into the house, heading to your room. Throughout the year you've been married, you and Shinjuro have never once shared a bed. Not even on your wedding night. He'd barely even made it through the ceremony before he was passed out in a drunken stupor. If not for Kyojuro and Senjuro, you might have run away there and then. Your marriage is loveless by every definition.

"SENJURO!!" Your husband bellows through the house, looking for his youngest. You know exactly what for. He's too drunk to go and buy sake himself, so he'll send the lad to do it. You step out of your room and find Shinjuro staggering through the kitchen. "Where's the boy?"

"Not here." You weren't about to tell Shinjuro, but his youngest son was at the butterfly mansion, where he would stay until he was ready to come home. You've had enough. You have all had enough.

Shinjuro closes his eyes and his throat flexes. He's either holding back from yelling or vomiting or both. "When you see him, tell him I need more sake. Some hell bitch threw mine away." And then he stumbles off to his bedroom and slides the door shut. A few moments later you hear a thud, and then snoring.

All things considered, it didn't go too badly.

Before you finish your chores you head over to Ruka's shrine. It has been a decade since Shinjuro's first wife passed, and you know how much he's hurting. You've lived through it yourself.

You had thought that having both lost your spouses, you would have been a compatible match and bonded over your shared loss, but Shinjuro had only ever reluctantly accepted you as his wife. You were more of a nanny and maid.

"Ruka… I'm trying," you whisper as you kneel and light the incense. "I'll keep trying, for the boys and for him."

The next day, Shinjuro is in a foul mood as anticipated. He trudges from his room and instinctively heads to the porch before remembering the events of the previous day.

"You owe me a bottle of sake," he grumbles, his voice deep and rough.

"You owe me a year of my life. Let's just call it even."

His thick black eyebrows furrow. "Where's Senjuro?"

"Gone."

"Gone where? There are chores to be done…"

You take a breath. "Senjuro left here yesterday morning. He's gone to stay with friends. Kyojuro and I thought it would be best."

"What the hell is this? My whole good for nothing family turning against me?" He shakes his head, furious tears forming in his eyes. "Why did you take my son away?"

"I didn't send him, he wanted to go," you try to keep your voice firm but calm. Your heart is racing, and as much as you want to get the hell out too, you need to do this for Kyojuro and Senjuro. "Don't you see what you're doing to this family?"

Shinjuro scoffs. "You're the one breaking us apart. The boys are all I have!"

"Senjuro flinches when you walk into the room. Kyojuro works so hard every damn day to make you proud and all you ever do is drink and tell him he's worthless. I don't want to drive your family apart. I want to fix it. I need to fix it, because you have two wonderful sons who deserve the world. And all you're giving them is hell."

He stares at you. A tear runs down your cheek and you quickly wipe it away. He knows you lost your own son, that you blame yourself for failing to protect him from the demon who killed both him and your husband. If Kyojuro had gotten there just a second later, you would have died too.

He steps toward you, muttering the first syllable of your name before he shakes his head. For a moment you could swear he almost showed you empathy. "So… what you're telling me is that I need to quit drinking, and then I'll get my boys back."

You nod. "I know how much you're hurting Shinjuro. I know Ruka was your world and you love her so much the pain is unbearable. But the drink isn't numbing it, is it? You're still hurting, and all the drink does is spread that pain to others." You take a step toward him and lay your hand on his forearm, gazing up at him with desperation in your eyes. "Let me help you, because you truly have such wonderful, kind sons, and they deserve a father. And you don't deserve to drink yourself to an early grave."

His jaw tightens and he looks away. "There's nothing left of me for you to save."

"That's not true." Your racing heart is breaking as you look into your husband's eyes and see there's no light in them at all. "Shinjuro, we'll get you back."

"It's impossible–"

"We're Rengokus. We do not give up. Please Shinjuro… let me help you and then… then I'll leave. You'll never have to see me again. But do this for your sons."

His eyes snap toward you. "Why would you leave?"

"Because I know you don't love me. You never have, and that's fine." A bitter chuckle leaves your lips. "I don't love you either. Let's just do this one thing. If all we ever do is get you through this, I'll consider our marriage a success."

He stares at you for a moment before his gaze drops to the floor. "Alright. I'll do it. For the boys."

The first weeks are hell.

The withdrawal keeps Shinjuro up at night. He shakes and sweats, throwing his guts up and snapping at you constantly. His irritability is worse than ever and you start to doubt either of you has the strength to keep doing this.

Every night you pray at Ruka's shrine. It's a comfort to feel like you're both trying to help. The photograph of her gazes back at you with endless patience and grace, and you try your best to draw strength from the hope that she's watching your efforts.

You wash the sweat and vomit from his clothes, you brew tea to help his nausea and let him swear and grumble at you all he wants. But he doesn't touch a drop of sake.

One morning, three weeks after his last drink, Shinjuro emerges from his bedroom and walks to the table where you're eating breakfast alone.

"Good morning," he says, his voice as deep and growly as ever but lately it's a little gentler.

"How was last night?"

"Better…" he pulls in a breath and walks to the pot of rice gruel on the table, ladling out a bowl for himself.

"You're eating breakfast?" You've never seen him eat breakfast in the whole year you've been married.

He nods. "Yeah… I'm hungry."

For the first time, your husband sits beside you and eats. He doesn't smell of sweat and sake anymore, he just smells like… Shinjuro.

"I'm going to cut firewood today," he tells you as he eats. "I noticed we're getting low, with the boys being gone."

Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Shinjuro has never done chores. "Oh, thank you."

"Don't thank me. I live here too. It's only fair I do my share." He finishes his breakfast and sets his bowl down. His eyes are downcast. "I'm sorry."

Silence hangs between the two of you.

You aren't sure how to respond. There are no words to describe the tangled web of feelings you have for the man. There's so much resentment and anger. But you're proud of him too, so very very proud. And truth be told, though your marriage exists in name only, you're attached to him.

His hand rests on your shoulder, so big and heavy and oh-so warm. "I've been a terrible husband and an even worse father."

"Yes."

He bows his head. "I know words mean less than actions, but I will atone for what I've done and become worthy of the name Rengoku once more." He pulls in a long breath and turns to face you. "My wife… will–" He shakes his head, composes himself, and says firmly, "Can I hold you?"

His request takes you by surprise. "But you hate me."

"No," he shakes his head. "No, I've never hated you. How could I? I've watched you keep this home running while I've sat idle and useless. I've watched you be a mother to the boys and put up with the hell I dragged you through with grace and strength." His gold and crimson eyes are fixed on you. "You are a remarkable woman, the strongest I have ever known. And I know I'm unworthy of claiming the title of your husband, I'm beyond honored to call you my wife."

You can only stare. This man is so different from the one you've been married to this past year. "Shinjuro…" his name emerges as a whisper before your lips curve and you smile at him for perhaps the first time ever.

Words are unnecessary as you lean into your husband's embrace and his strong arms wrap around you as he buries his face against your shoulder.

And God, it shouldn't feel this good to finally feel appreciated and loved by him, but it does. You hold each other as if your embrace could heal the deepest wounds, bringing your hand up to softly stroke the back of his head and his wild fiery hair.

"I'm so proud of you," you say at last. "I know nothing has been easy these past ten years."

"It hasn't been for you either, and I've made it so much worse." He pulls back from the embrace and looks into your eyes. "I'm going to be the husband you deserve, if you'll have me. But don't answer yet. Let me earn it."

He stands and takes your bowls to wash them. When he's done he silently heads outside and it isn't long before you hear the rhythmic thump of an ax hitting wood.

You go about your daily routine, keeping the Rengoku homestead together as best as you can. You clean, maintain, fix, and finally cook.

When dinner is ready you head outside to tell Shinjuro, but the sight which greets you knocks the air from your lungs.

He's still hard at work, his torso completely bare and his yukata gathered about his hips. His body is so big and burly, softened by age yet still so strong even though years have passed since he quit his hashira training. He's sweating and his cheeks and chest are flushed a warm shade of pink. He's slightly breathless. The golden sunset highlights every curve and muscle of his body.

You just… stand… transfixed.

Your body knows what it wants immediately.

He finally notices you standing on the porch and wipes his brow on his forearm. "Everything okay?"

"Mhm… yeah…" you nod as heat creeps across your cheeks and pools in the pit of your belly. "Dinner's ready."

He nods. "Almost done."

The heat in your belly seeps lower as you watch him swing the ax again.

You have to turn away. It has been years since you felt anything close to desire, and the sudden onslaught to your senses is more than you can handle. Heading inside, you splash cold water on your cheeks and add the noodles to the pot, ready to serve.

"Mmm…"

Your heart flutters as you hear Shinjuro's low hum of approval as he steps into the house a few minutes later. "Smells like miso."

"Miso ramen."

"My favorite!"

"I know." You chance looking around and instantly regret it.

His yukata is back in place but he must have quickly washed up outside as his hair is wet and scraped up into a ponytail. And though he's clearly made an effort to be presentable, the fact remains that his yukata is hardly big enough to fully cover his chest. You can't tear your eyes from the hypnotic sight of water droplets sliding down over his skin.

"Oh~" you clear your throat and turn back to the pot, fixing two bowls of ramen. "It's a shame Kyojuro isn't back yet. He loves this dish."

"Kyojuro loves every dish," Shinjuro chuckles as he sits at the table. "Feeding him costs a fortune. But your ramen is very good." A pained sigh escapes him. "I do miss the boy. I expect he and I will have a difficult conversation upon his return. Difficult but necessary. And as for Senjuro, I can only hope he wishes to come back home."

You set the bowls on the table and sit beside him. "He will. He wants his father. And I've written to him telling him how well you're doing, though it may take a while for the letter to reach him, since Kyojuro has the kasugai crow on his mission."

Shinjuro pauses with his spoon mid air. "You did that for us?"

You nod.

He reaches out and puts his hand on yours. "I would marry you again, you know. I know you probably can't say the same and I don't blame you for that one bit. But I would marry you without hesitation."

His hand completely covers yours; large, firm, and warm. You rotate your wrist and turn your palm upward to interlock your fingers with his.

"It hasn't been easy, Shinjuro, but I would do this a thousand times over to meet the version of you I see today." His stubble rasps against your palm as you reach out and affectionately cup his chin with your other hand, lifting it ever so slightly so he sits a little prouder. "I knew there was a good man beneath all those snarls."

He chuckles and smiles at you fondly. "Thank you. Ah, I should probably shave, shouldn't I?"

"It's up to you, I quite like the stubble."

"Oh you do?" He raises a thick, dark eyebrow. "Then I'll keep it."

Your cheeks heat. You're flirting with your husband! He laughs softly and continues eating his ramen.

"It's good. Thank you. You're an excellent cook and an even better wife."

When evening comes and it's time for you to go to bed, you stand together in the center of your house between the two doors.

"Goodnight, sweet wife," he says, squeezing your hand affectionately.

"Goodnight, husband who is trying very hard."

He laughs before he turns and heads to his room.

From that point on, each day gets a little easier. You sit and eat meals with your husband and both spend the day working around your home. You become a team, a family. And every day he recovers more of himself. Every day he becomes the man his family deserves.

When he's a month sober, you prepare a special dinner; a little banquet just for the two of you.

"Oh my!" His smile beams as he sees all your hard work. "My darling wife, you really are wonderful."

"Thank you." Your heart leaps as he leans in and gently kisses your cheek.

"No, no, thank you." He chuckles and sits down to eat. He'll never admit it, but since he sobered up it's very apparent that Shinjuro absolutely shares the same voracious appetite as Kyojuro. "Mm… tasty."

You sit together, shoulder to shoulder as you eat, discussing the day and what still needs to be done around the house tomorrow. When he's finished eating you hand him a letter. "It's from Senjuro."

His smile falters and he suddenly looks timid. His fingers are shaking as he opens the letter. You already know the contents, you know it's nothing but sweetness– of course it is, it's Senjuro– but you know how terrifying this must be for Shinjuro.

You put your arm around his back as he reads and a few moments later you feel him start to shake as he grits his teeth and a sob bursts out of him.

"Senju–" he cries, bringing the letter to his lips and closing his eyes. "Oh my sweet boys. I miss them."

You pull him into an embrace, wrapping your arms around him; one around his back, the other cradling his head to your chest as you press your lips to his hair. "It's okay. You're doing so well, Shinjuro. They'll be back soon and they'll be proud to call you their father."

He nods and wraps his arms around your waist, holding you as his tears subside and he composes himself. "You're right. They'll be back and they'll have a father they can be proud of." He keeps holding you, keeps resting his head against you. "Thank you. I can never thank you enough for what you've done for our family."

"I would do it every day, a hundred times over." You kiss the top of his head, letting your lips linger in his hair. The scent of him is so comforting now, so you draw a deep breath.

He raises his head to look at you, smiling softly, and leaning in to place a gentle, loving kiss on your cheek.

His lips are soft in contrast to his stubble which rasps over your skin and stirs a cloud of butterflies in your belly.

Your heart races as you close the space between you once more and kiss his cheek in return. Your kiss lands a little lower, a little closer to his lips.

He mirrors your gesture, exchanging another chaste kiss at the corner of your mouth. And another. And another.

The air between you grows thick and hot as those chaste kisses become loaded with a deeper need. And with every kiss your heart beats a little faster.

Your faces are just inches apart, his shallow breaths fluttering against your lips as the lids grow heavy over golden hued eyes. His gaze drifts to your lips. "Is it…okay if–?"

"Yes."

He chuckles, brushing his fingertips against your jaw and gently clasping your chin to bring your lips to his. His kiss is soft and tender, his lips slowly and tentatively caressing yours, as if he's rediscovering a path he once knew so well.

But once he finds the rhythm his kiss grows more intense, and a deep, desperate moan rolls through his chest and echoes in you. The moment his tongue slips against yours you're both gone; lost to the heat and the pleasant tingles shooting through your bodies.

He pulls back for a moment, checking in on you, but you quickly close the gap once more, kissing him with all the passion and adoration you've craved for so long.

Your fingers graze over his stubble as you cup his face between your hands.

"Oh, my wife," he whispers against your lips as he switches from deep, hungry kisses to feathery, gentle ones. "My sweet wife."

He presses his forehead to yours as he traces your lips with his fingertip, making you shiver.

"I should have told you every day; you're so beautiful," his voice is low and quiet and just for you. "I want to spend the rest of my life cherishing you as you deserve." He places a soft kiss at the corner of your lips. "I never thought I'd feel this way again."

You can hardly breathe; his tenderness is lovely and overwhelming. "I know I'll never replace Ruka. I don't intend to, and I would never expect you to stop loving her."

"You're right, I'll always love her, but I love you too, and there's room for both of you in my heart." He tucks your hair back behind your ear and kisses your temple. "I would never expect you to stop loving your late first husband either. The ones we lose, they're a part of us, and they would want us to be happy." He caresses your cheek and it isn't until he wipes away your tears that you realize you've begun to cry. "Before she died, Ruka begged two things of me: to take care of our boys and to find love again. And you've made both her final wishes possible. Ruka was my first love, but you are my last."

Your heart squeezes at his words. You caress his stubbled cheek before leaning in and letting your kiss tell him everything you can't find the words to express. His lips are addictive, and every kiss fans heat through your body. When you pull away you gently suck his lower lip, pulling a deep, needy groan from him.

"Oh~" his eyes flutter closed. One of his hands is at the back of your neck, the other drifts down to your waist. "You're making me weak, wife."

You can't help but smile as you lean in again and kiss him even deeper. That you can reduce this big, strong former hashira to whimpers with just a kiss is more thrilling than you ever imagined.

His cheeks are a deep shade of pink as he gazes down at you. "We have a lot of time to make up. I want to take care of you. Tell me how to do that."

"Well, we never got a wedding night," you say as your heart pounds.

"You're right." He kisses you again, runs his fingers through your hair. It seems he can't get enough of the sensation of you. "Would you like me to make up for that tonight?"

Your throat is dry, your breath stilted as you nod. "Yes. Shinjuro, right now I want nothing more."

You can see in his eyes how much this means to him. And you feel it too. It's not just the physical pleasure, but the intimacy, the outlet, the emotional release. He carries you to his bedroom and sets you down on the bed, his lips curving into a genuine and grateful smile as he kneels between your knees and leans forward, pressing his body against yours and kissing you.

It's been so long since you felt anything like this, and your body drinks it in. Before long you're kissing like teenagers, both flushed, your bodies heating. You wrap your legs around him, grinding your hips against his, seeking friction as his tongue strokes yours.

He chuckles softly. "Easy, little spitfire. I said I'd take care of you and I want to do it thoroughly." His fingers make short work of your clothing, laying you bare as his breath catches in his throat. "Beautiful," he whispers, his voice thick with reverence as he gazes down at you.

He kisses your neck, your collarbone, your breasts, latching onto your nipples with a wanton moan.

There's so much time to make up for, and he loves you. He desperately does. Never once during that year of lonely hell did you ever suspect that Shinjuro was a man who loves to fuck, but as he kisses his way down your belly and over your hips, he can't hide the curve of his lips or the gleam in his eyes.

His stubble rasps against your inner thighs as he teases you with hot, hungry kisses, inching closer and closer to where you so desperately need him.

"Just relax," he tells you in that soft, growly voice as he lies between your legs, his lips just inches from your pussy. "Let your husband take care of you."

And God, he does just that. Shinjuro eats your pussy like it's his first meal in forever, licking, sucking, groaning as he devours you. He's experienced; he knows exactly what he's doing, and he's enthusiastic about it, wanting nothing more than your pleasure and your fingers tangled in his fiery hair.

He listens to your moans, he pays attention, figuring out what works for you. Hooking a large, warm hand behind your knee, he lifts your leg and puts it over his broad shoulder and seals his lips around your clit, softly sucking as his tongue flutters. He's spurred on by your cries, your gasps, the way your legs tremble.

"Shinjuro…I'm close."

It's music to his ears. He doesn't stop, he keeps the same pressure, the same pace, letting your pleasure build and build until you fall apart, bucking against his skillful mouth as he laps up every drop of your essence. When your trembling subsides he gently and affectionately nuzzles your clit with the tip of his nose.

"God." You lie there panting as he kisses your inner thighs once more.

"Do you want more?" He asks, lifting your leg and trailing kisses down your calf.

"I never want it to end."

He laughs quietly, shifting his body so he can lie on top of you. You kiss him deeply, tasting yourself on his lips as you run your fingers over his back. His muscles flex and relax beneath your touch.

"Do you want me to fuck you?" He whispers in your ear.

"Yes." There's so much desperation in your voice.

A low, approving moan emerges from him before he rocks up onto his knees and stands to undress. His body is just as strong and burly as you remember and just the sight of him makes your breath catch. His cock is hard and standing straight out, curved slightly upward toward the tip, and thickly veined.

His eyes are soft as he looks down at you, but the shallow rise and fall of his chest tells you he's anything but calm.

Raising up, you sit on the bed and put your hands on his hips, pulling him toward you. He smiles and obeys your silent command, stepping closer to you to lay back down on top of you.

"I can't tell you how good it feels to know you want me," he whispers close to your ear. "My God, I have such a beautiful wife."

He trails kisses down your neck, pressing his lips to your throat as you run your fingers through his hair.

"You feel so good, Shinjuro."

"I want to make sure you're good and ready for me first." He reaches down between your legs, his fingers gliding over your overstimulated clit and down to your entrance. He gently pushes his finger inside, gasping at the wet warmth of your pussy squeezing him. "Ohh~ my girl, you're so wet already."

You're out of your mind with desire and pleasure as he finds the exact spot to curl his fingers against. "Shin… oh…"

"Hm? Is that good?" He adds another finger, circling your clit with his thumb and watching your every reaction.

He fucks you with his fingers deep and slow, stretching you out in preparation, enamored with your whimpers and the way you moan his name.

Lowering his head, he takes your nipple into his mouth and laps at it with his tongue. "Are you going to cum for me again, my love?"

"Y-yes."

"Good girl, I know you've got at least one more for me."

You're damn near feral as he keeps coaxing out your pleasure, that big, warm body of his pressing you down against the mattress. Your inner muscles flutter and clench around his fingers.

"That's it, my love. There it is. Let's get this pretty pussy all wet and ready for me."

Your orgasm tears through you and you cry out in pure bliss as he keeps on praising you in his deep, rough voice.

"That's my girl. Oh you look so beautiful; so ready for me. You want it now, huh?"

All you can do is nod. He chuckles and pulls out his fingers, bringing them to his mouth before he sucks them clean. "Mm~ I'm never going to get enough of your taste."

"Shinjuro," you moan as your hips involuntarily buck toward him. Your need surpasses all other sensation. You need to be fucked and you need it now.

Shinjuro's lips curve into a grin. He strokes his cock between your folds, coating himself in your slick essence before he presses his tip to your entrance.

"God, you're so big," you gasp as he pushes into you. Even with all his preparation there's still a little resistance.

"Nice and easy, little spitfire," he grunts, his brow knitting together as he slides slowly deeper. "Ohh, you feel so damn good."

He buries his cock to the hilt inside you, leaning forward so his chest is pressed to yours and he can rest his weight on his forearms as he caresses your face and strokes your hair sweetly while grinding his hips against yours.

"Look at you, my pretty wife, taking my cock so well."

As your passion grows, his vocabulary dwindles to nothing more than grunts and gasps. He rolls his hips, aiming to hit every pleasurable spot with each slow thrust. He's patient, savoring the sensation of you as he kisses every inch of your face.

His restraint starts to fray as you rock your hips beneath him, hinting that you want more.

Those golden eyes of his flutter shut, and his lips part around a silent gasp. "If you keep that up I'm not going to last, my love."

You kiss him, deeply, your tongue dancing slowly with his as you keep on rocking your hips. As much as you want this to last forever, you want him to feel good too. Watching him start to lose his composure is a beautiful feeling.

He groans against your mouth. "Do you want to get on top?"

"Yes."

He rolls you over and lies back, letting you align yourself properly to ride him. Putting one arm behind his head, he reaches out with the other and touches the base of his cock, sliding up until he touches your pussy, tracing the seam where your bodies meet, with a deep, approving moan. "So perfect."

You place your hands on his belly for balance and start to roll your hips, taking him slow and steady, rocking forward so your breasts are just a few inches from his face.

"Ohh~" He's in bits as you ride him, his cheeks flushed, his eyes heavy-lidded.

Ever-desperate to please you, he strokes your clit with the pad of his thumb, watching the way you move like he's bound by your spell.

As your pleasure grows you start to move faster, taking him harder and deeper until you're riding him with desperate abandon.

Your backs arch in sync as the pleasure becomes too much to bear, as waves of pleasure wash over you and you fall apart, he cries out, gasping, thrusting his hips up into you as he finishes.

And then you collapse, fucked-out and blissful in the arms of your husband. Finally, finally after all this time.

You both lie there gasping for air, exchanging soft laughter and gentle kisses.

"I love you, wife." He pulls you to him, wrapping his strong arms around you as if he intends to protect you from the world.

And finally you speak the words you've longed to feel since the day you married him. "I love you too."

You mean it. You truly do.

For the first time in your marriage you and Shinjuro fall asleep holding each other. And that's how you sleep every night thereafter.

~A year later~

"YOU'RE HOME!" Senjuro is only fifteen and probably only half Kyojuro's weight, but he barrels into his older brother with enough force to knock the man flying onto his ass. The boys' loud, contagious laughter rings through the house.

"Careful! Careful!" Shinjuro chuckles, ruffling his youngest son's hair before helping the eldest up from the ground.

"Thank you father," Kyojuro beams as he dusts off his hashira uniform and places his hand flat on Senjuro's head, measuring his height against himself and widening his eyes when he finds Senjuro is at nose-height. "Goodness! When did you get so tall?! You must stop growing. I'll be the shortest in no time."

"Then I'll call you 'little brother' instead." Senjuro grins.

A laugh shakes Shinjuro's chest as he places his hand on his eldest son's shoulder. "You may be the shortest soon but I'm still proud of you. I'm proud of you both. I have fine boys." He smiles affectionately. "How was the mission?"

"Successful." Kyojuro lifts his chin proudly. "We prevailed, and the demon's would-be victims are safe. He won't hurt anyone again."

A moment later, Kyojuro is damn near swept off his feet a second time as his father pulls him into a tight embrace.

You can't help but smile from the doorway before heading into the kitchen. It's late spring, the air is fresh and pleasant, and everybody's home. It's as good an excuse to prepare a feast as any.

Getting to this point took some work. There were many tears and long conversations. But in the end the family has come together and emerged from the darkness stronger. The Rengoku house is once again filled with love and laughter.

Kyojuro walks into the kitchen and wraps his arms around you. He knows what you endured throughout his father's recovery, and he'll never stop showing you how grateful he is.

"I'm so glad you're home," you say softly as you hug your stepson back.

He pulls back and his smile is beaming. Both Kyo and Senju have their father's hair and eyes, but Kyojuro is the spitting image of Ruka; his presence just as calming and comforting as the picture on her shrine.

"How is he?" he asks.

"Your father?"

"No, no I can see he's well. I mean…" his eyes dart downward to your stomach.

You laugh, "Oh, you're so certain you have a new little brother?"

"I'm positive, there hasn't been a girl in our family as far back as records go. Could you imagine a little girl with these eyebrows??" He laughs loudly.

There's nothing wrong with our eyebrows," Shinjuro interjects as he enters the kitchen too. "Now, if you don't mind, your stepmother and I have a feast to prepare. You and Senjuro have a lot of catching up to do, I'm sure."

Your husband rolls his sleeves over his muscular forearms and gives you a wry smile as the boys head off, chattering between themselves.

"We all love you, you know?" he says quietly as he begins chopping vegetables. "You brought this family back from the brink, and I can never thank you enough."

"You thank me plenty."

"It's still not enough."

He sets down the knife and stands behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and leaning around to place a dozen little kisses on your cheek.

You laugh– as you do so often these days– and kiss your husband, proud to be his and proud to love him so openly. Because Shinjuro Rengoku is a man to be proud of.

The end

#kny shinjuro #shinjuro x reader #rengoku shinjuro #shinjuro smut #rengoku #rengoku x reader #shinjuro rengoku #shinjuro x yn

1K notes · View notes

polarisjisung · 1 month

Text

BEST THING I NEVER HAD

synopsis: the line between giving up and seeing how much more you can take had always been blurry, tonight it seems nonexistent

wc: 3.1k

pairings: jaemin × fem!reader

genre: angst, hearbreak

warnings: mentions of violence, jaemin's injured, use of petnames, jaemin's oblivious and annoying, jaemin sucks, basically a situationship, slight gaslighting

notes: HAPPY JAEMIN DAY, i have a love hate relationship with this work (I suppose you could say its bittersweet 🤭) anyways here's part one! pls notice the beyoncé inspired title

Despite its softness, you can't help but jump at the sound of knocking against your front door.

just loud enough that you'd hear, but quiet enough that your parents wouldn't. It was a specific pattern of 5 knocks, delivered through the knuckles of an index and middle finger, in true jaemin fashion.

You wonder if its healthy, to be able to recognise the hooded silhouette that stands outside your door, to know someone from nothing but the tapping of their knuckles against a slab of wood, to know exactly the state you'll find him in if you swing the door open like you usually would.

It isn't, you suppose. but healthy had never been the word to describe you and jaemin. not the ungodly dessert bowls you made as midnight snacks together, not the lounging around all day doing nothing and certainly not the cycle of longing you found yourself in.

Time and time again you found yourself tearing yourself apart for him, for his love, and each time it would end with you slowly putting those broken pieces, shreds, of yourself back together, alone and all by yourself.

Though you're not sure you did ever recover fully, like a piece of your heart was lost every time jaemin turned his back to leave and never come back.

Like the tiny fragments of a broken glass, the ones you could never quite see as you sweeped up a mess of shattered glass and would find yourself stepping all over days later.

But he did come back. You suppose that was the problem, he came back every time.

Jaemin had this perfect ability of keeping you on edge, never pushing you far enough to leave, never pushing himself far enough to stay. It was the way he did most things, showing up at your door at a time you weren't sure was morning or night, coming back just before you'd manage to convince yourself he wouldn't, leaving just before your hope that he'd stay would come true. jaemin took this middle path in life that lead to the worst of both worlds, best of none. and it left you unsatisfied every time

Regardless, you'd been craving, almost desperate for his presence, anticipation bubbling in your chest every night since the last you'd seen him, in hopes you'd find a wounded jaemin helplessly stood at your doorstep with sparkly eyes and a smile that told you it would all be alright. it seemed that was the only way you saw him anyways, the way you hated most, injured that is.

So you'd prayed day and night, clasped your hands together and had gotten down on your knees and begged that he'd stay true to his word, that he wouldn't leave and that this wouldn't happen— yet here you were.

You haven't seen jaemin in weeks, but you still remember it all the same, the spark of glee that would ignite within you whenever you heard him at your door.

Tonight his presence makes your chest tighten and your mouth dry up— you feel the way your breaths force themselves through the confines of your throat, almost choking you.

The feeling is foreign and a sharp contrast to the way your cheeks would flush over and your heart would once race at the thought of jaemin.

Tonight you stray far from that love struck awe, eyes clenched so hard you were beginning to see colour. there's a growing lump in your throat that doesn't seem as negligible as before, with each shortened intake of breath it doubles maybe even triples in size— your vision, in spite of your shut eyes, blurrs into an abyss of absolute nothingness

And despite the thick wooden door that separates you, tonight na jaemin's presence feels suffocating.

You're not sure you'd describe it as love, certainly it wasn't that warm feeling of butterflies in your stomach and giddiness you knew before, like you were star struck, instead it was this feverish conjugation that made your hands clammy and your ears ring. Like the butterflies now had broken wings. You felt ill.

It had always been that way, only your heart would wrench after jaemin left and never while he stood expectant on your front porch. You suppose when he leaves for so long and stays for so little, your heart doesn't bother to acknowledge his visits anymore, like some form of a self-defense mechanism that protects you against yourself. because you never really could protect yourself against him

Suddenly, the difference being lovestruck and lovesick had never been clearer.

It had been three months.

A whole three months since you'd last seen him and tonight, tonight was the night he came back— unannounced, unexpected, and finally, finally, after days and weeks of convincing yourself, unwanted.

You know better than to let him in, not just into your home, but into your heart. And if you had learnt anything in your lifetime of knowing na jaemin, it was that those two were absolutely synonymous

Your heart that had only just now begun to learn that it could survive without him, thrive without him in fact.

You know that this is it, tonight would make it or break it— either way you know it would break you.

In the long run, it's not hard to figure out what you should do but you're a creature of habit, compelled by nothing more than muscle memory and indecision.

Your shaking hands reach for the door and begin turning the lock faster than you can convince yourself against the idea.

sure enough there he is, not an inch of skin that isn't painted in the cold shades of purple and blue yet hes staring up at you with so much warmth.

"How do you always get yourself like this, how do you get worse everytime" your words came as whisper.

You're not sure if your words hold the alternate meaning you hope they do, but as you take in the image of jaemin in front of you, you swear he's almost unrecognisable, so far beyond bruised that you wonder if you should be so cruel as to slam the door in his face.

He shrugs in response to your question, the cold breeze that brushes past the two of you biting at your skin, the thin material of your pyjama shorts doing little to nothing to keep your warm.

You're not supposed to let him in, but surely, you could always find a way to push him out, right?

There's some sort of a cheeky grin on his lips as you step aside to let him in, perhaps if he knew this was the last time he'd be stepping through the double doors of your home he would've worn an expression a lot different— you hoped he would at least.

But you know better than to occupy yourself in thoughts of what ifs.

Jaemin makes a beeline for the couch, as you do for the first aid kit that rests atop the kitchen cupboards, wordlessly.

Though the silence is nothing new, jaemin doesn't feel the welcoming atmosphere around him as he steps further into your home, in fact he feels nothing at all.

He looks over at you.

It's not tiredness that sits atop your features, the details of your pretty face all committed to his memory, yet the slight furrow of your brows and the way your lips pinch into a tight line aren't familiar to jaemin at all. There's something he can't quite put his finger on that sends him into a frenzy of panic and worry

"Hey doll?" you hum in response "are you okay?"

"Am I okay?" you chuckle wryly, "shouldn't I be asking you that jaemin?"

"Touche" you assume he lets it go, but jaemin doesnt know how, pushing a little further

"You just seem a little, off?"

After all, limits weren't something jaemin recognised well

You hate that he can't recognise the plain, simple and painfully obvious look of disappointment that's written all over your face either

Regardless you don't worry enough about his words to credit him with a response, rubbing the antiseptic roughly into his skin before reaching for the tube and letting it fall into the empty trash can, the thud as it hit the bottom filling you with ease.

You hate waste just as much as the next person, but wasting a little medicine was fine, just as long as you didn't waste anymore time on him.

Jaemin's brows knit together in a tight knot, watching you make your way back towards him with full consciousness, though there's something about the way you walk, trudge even, maybe its the way your feet drag across the carpet or the way your steps seem smaller, less eager, that has his heart sinking a little

"Doll, I'm not sure you meant to put that there" he says, attempting to brush a stray hair from your face, though you turn your head before he gets the chance

"Hmm?" your eyes trail over to the bin "oh, I just thought if I'm never going to use it again, there's no point keeping it around" you shrug

But you always kept it around, you kept it for him— remember he was allergic to the regular stuff.

What did you mean you'd never use it again?

Jaemin licks his lips, letting a soft sigh escape them as he watches you hurriedly place band aids over his cuts

"What's got you like this?" he says, you play innocent, shooting a look of confusion his way— jaemin doesn't expand, you don't answer

The room is cold, or at least it feels that way, despite the fire that's burning just a few feet away from him. The chill of silence is overwhelming, and the warmth you'd once emit in your words, in your actions, in your gaze, they're all missing.

"Did I do something wrong?" he whispers, innocent beady eyes forced into your face as he holds you close, not letting you slip through his hands— ironically you're already too far out of reach

All it takes is for you to bite at the left corner of your bottom lip for jaemin to know you're deep in thought

You wonder if he's just playing oblivious or if jaemin really and truly thinks that his little back and forth games don't have any consequences.

Either way, you shake your head at him— it wasn't all his fault.

Really you had no one to blame except yourself, you should've known better than to be so vulnerable to the likes of him.

You know better than to tell him what's wroong. You know that you can't risk receiving an apology from him, because if he made even the slightest inclination to sorriness, you'd accept it.

That's how you loved him. How much you loved him.

At one point you swore you'd let him drag you down to hell if it meant you could hold his hand on the way down— you're not sure the life you're living is much different though

You're not entirely sure you wouldn't let him drag you down now either, but the lack of certainty is the only push you need to know that this time, it's your turn to be selfish.

"All done," you whisper, his wounds quickly tended to with little precision and perhaps even less care, absentmindedly wrapped in a loose gauze.

This time, jaemin catches onto the ulterior meaning of your words, watching the way you head towards the staircase.

"Doll, talk to me what's wrong?" it's that tone laced with all forms of concern and worry that has the tears welling in your eyes

If jaemin hadn't reached out for your wrist and stopped you, you'd have made your way back up to your room without another word

But he does, he does stop you and it stops you from walking away

"I don't think I can" you say and all jaemin can do is tug at your wrist to finally get you to face him, a dull expression on your face. Every feature he knows and loves and remembers contorted into a look of nothingness.

"Y/n, please"

"Just go jaemin, you know the way out" you sigh, your speech is tired and lacks energy, a deep reflection of your soul and how you felt about the routine the two of you had established. If only Jaemin could see that.

"I can't just go when you're so clearly upset" he says— oh, but he can

You knew that better than anyone else.

"You let yourself believe that"

The words come as a whisper, like you almost hope he doesn't hear them, fast off the tongue but meant with true intent

And to jaemin they tasted bitter, superficial, like you didn't speak with your heart, but your mind, the sweetness he knew of your speech so severely lacking.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that you're so oblivious to how—" for a moment you're ready to tell jaemin all there is to know about the two of you, but you know its no use, jaemin would feed you the sweetest lies and you'd mistake them as the truest of promises.

"Actually you know what never mind what I mean, just go jaemin" you sigh, raking your fingers through your hair

You take his silence as reason to continue, maybe because talking is the only thing you know will keep the tears in your eyes from falling or maybe it's the look in his eyes that urges you to continue

"We're stuck in this never-ending loop, can't you see that?" the control you had over the volume of your voice diminishes with each word, but you're not sure you care, "just stop jaemin"

"Stop what?"

"Coming back" you suck in a harsh breath "just leave like you always do but this time, don't come back, please please please don't come back" you hate the way your voice cracks and your speech almost falters, burning your throat.

"I'll do whatever you say doll, just tell me what this is about and I prom—"

You cut him off before he can let the word fall from his lips, eyes widened before being clenched shut in the span of a few seconds

"Don't promise jaemin, you never stick to them" you sigh again "just go"

"You know I can't"

"you do it every time, what makes this time so different?" your tone is sour and jaemin knows better than to dispute your words, harsh but so painfully true

"You're upset" he tries, but it doesn't seem enough when you scoff right in his face and the feeling that follows only makes you hope you'd done this all so much earlier.

"Yeah? well that's nothing new, just walk out the door and break my heart like you always do— I'm begging" you shut your eyes, a harsh deep breath taken in before you continue "I need time to heal, you never give me time to heal, so I'm begging you this time, just don't come back"

"Break your heart?" the words echo from his tongue in fragments, like he's still piecing together your sentences to make sense of them. Jaemins eyes are soft and glossy as he looks up at you a couple steps away

"yeah"

"But I love you doll, I only come back because I love you" that's something you wish jaemin could've said sooner, maybe it would've meant something then.

It's a lie, you know it is, you're sure it is and despite all the lies he tells you, you'd never wished more than this for his words to be true.

"Then stop" you say, trying to shoot off up the stairs but jaemin's fingers remain wrapped aorund your wrist, grip firm and unwavering

"So what? you're just going to throw it all away? all this time we've known each other, all the memories, you're just going to pretend it doesn't exist?" he finally argued back, mouth slightly ajar as his breaths grew deeper "like we don't exist?"

"We don't jaemin, reality is that you're not mine and I'm not yours as much as I let myself be— you and I we just don't work" you wonder if he's even listening when he turns his head, scoffing to the floor with a tongue running across his inner cheek "we're not good for each oth--"

"How can you know that when we've never even tried" his voice is loud, the loudest you've ever heard, a deep booming from the pit of his stomach that has you reeling back, gulping as he cuts you off

"I don't know about you jaemin but I tried jaemin, I did but now I'm tired"

"How can you be tired of us?" his voice shakes, he seems feeble despite what he was just a few moments ago— you realise it's one of jaemin's best tactics, making you pity him when it's the last thing you should be doing.

Somehow despite how aware you are of it now, your heart still wrenches at the thought of upsetting him.

"it's not us" you defend, knowing full well that that's exactly what it was " I just, I don't deserve this jaemin, I don't deserve someone who keeps coming back" the glossiness of his eyes grows further " I deserve someone who never leaves"

"Then why are you telling me to go?" his eyes are telling, red and his heart, even if just for a moment rests on his sleeve.

"Because I know you, you're not capable of staying. You can't" his grip loosens, he takes a step back and though he argues again, you know this is it.

"I can. I will. I'd do anything for you" he says, and you swear your gulp is audible, you almost hear it echo through the room. Your stomach churns. You feel the way your insides tip upside down and back over again at the site of jaemin's furrowed brows and narrowed eyes, those pouty lips that you once loved bruised and trembling. His gaze though fixated on you is aloof, like he's not present at all. Suddenly it all feels too real. The way he pulls back, the spark in his eyes dimming and the confidence in his stance diminishing. Jaemin was giving up. But he wasn't giving up without a fight.

"You would?" you don't know why you ask, but jaemin nods anyway, and perhaps it soothes your broken heart ever so slightly to live in the blissful ignorance of thinking that his words were true. That he meant what he said.

To think that he ever loved you, even if for just a fraction of a moment, gives you reason to believe that this had all been worth it.

But you know better than to let a moments love turn into a lifetime's regret.

"Yeah" jaemin's words escape him in a sharp breath.

He finds himself holding onto the last thread of hope in your eyes that tells him that you feel the same. He holds your stare in his own for a while and though it was not warm, and it certainly was not kind— it was loving. And love was all jaemin had ever known from you.

"Then go" You say, and despite the various other words resting at the tip of your tongue, it's all you say.

Jaemin is left to do nothing but watch. You had taught him love, and now you had let him go.

The front door slams shut before you reach the top of the stairs, and it finally hits you that this is it.

Jaemin was gone, and just like you asked, he never came back.

permanent taglist : @sinisxtea @dearlyminhyung @nanawrlds

#jaemin angst #nct jaemin #na jaemin #jaemin #jaemin x oc #jaemin x y/n #jaemin x you #jaemin x reader #nct #nct dream jaemin #nct x female reader #nct x y/n #nct x oc #nct x you #nct x reader #nct angst #kpop angst #jaemin nct

180 notes · View notes

cranberryjuice-posts · 6 months

Text

-be still my foolish heart-

Pairings - Abby Anderson x fem! Teacher! Reader

Synopsis - rejoining the firefly’s has given Abby a chance to finally find love. Once she has she has no idea what to do with it.

An - HOZIER HOW I LOVE UR MUSIC

Cw - fluff to smut

Starting over wasnt easy. Anyone could testify to that.

Abby let out a deep sigh running a hand down her face. For the past year Abby had been readjusting to life, a former life she had long forgotten. Lev was helpful Sure but she didn’t know what to do with herself.

After becoming a firefly she had finally built up enough courage to admit that she herself was really only interested in Women.

But what made matters worse was you. Ever since that day in the infirmary where you helped Abby and lev recover You’ve just plagued the poor girls mind.

Washing her face Abby headed down stairs. Turning around the corner she almost fell, standing in the kitchen was you. Laughing with lev, coffee mug in and hand wearing Abby’s shirt— ONLY Abby’s shirt.

Looking over your shoulder you smiled at the blonde “morning, I made tea? Want some”

“Sure..” she mumbled walking towards the other side of the counter, where lev stood. You happily turned walking to the stove to pour Abby a glass.

With your back turned, abby grabbed levs hand dragging him into another room. “Why the hell is she here?!” She whispered yelled.

“She came by last night drunk, threw up on herself so I offered her one of your shirts I didn’t think it’d be a problem” he just shrugged his shoulders not really caring.

Abby however did. “Lev im going to beat your ass”

“It’s not That big of a Deal” lev continued on his stance, just as Abby was going to respond you called for her.

“Abby!” Turning around you saw Abby back at the kitchen counter, waiting like a puppy for your next command. “Here, Two spoons of sugar and a little cream. Just like how you like it” you smiled passing the mug over.

Abby just took the cup to her mouth not saying a word, secretly she preferred her tea without any additives that but she would never tell you. “I have a favor to ask” you tilted your head some to the side.

Abby perked up looking at you once more. “Yeah?”

“So, I know you use to be apart of some group before you came here and the teenagers that I teach are starting to want to get more responsibilities and with that they need to learn to fight. I was wondering if tomorrow you would come by and help me teach my lesson on the outside and how to fight the infected”

Abby kept quiet for a few moment. Mostly in awe that you wanted to ask her out of everyone else to help teach a class. Before she could respond lev did it for her. “She’ll be there” he spoke in his usual monotone voice while taking an apple off the table, leaving the room in the process.

Your shook your head finding lev to just be entertaining. “I got confrimation from your little assistant but I need a yes from you to”

“Yeah, I’ll do it sorry I just got lost in thoight” she tried to play her embarrassment off.

“Thankyou, your doing me a huge favor” you squeezed her arms gently. “I owe you one” you continued to Hold eye contact with her. Jesus fucking Christ Abby was down bad for you. She simply nodded watching as you to left most likely to get a change of clothes.

Now standing alone in the kitchen Abby looked down at her light tea and mentally debated on how to make a good impression tomorrow.

————

Nervously Abby stood in-front of the school house. Letting out a deep sigh she walked in, seeing your back facing her she took in your appearance.

Your natural hair pulled back with a bow, paired with a pair of bellbottoms that showed off your ass and a button down. Turning around finally you waved at Abby.

Making your way over to her you hugged her sweetly. “Thank you again, really I couldn’t do this without you”

“Don’t worry about it” she gave you a half smile back, admiring your body one final time she let you drag her towards the center of the class room.

Soon the class started to fill up, more and more kids coming in until all 15 of them were seated. “Good morning everyone” You smiled causing them to say it back.

“Today we have a Special guess Ms. Anderson, now I know you all want to go out and fight Infected and help keep us all safe so I had her come in today to help teach you all how to properly take care of not only your community but also the infected outside”

The way you held yourself and instructed your class honestly made Abby’s heart soar. Just how confident yet humble you were honestly made you more attractive in her eyes. Once you finished your speech you turned to Abby, allowing her to have the floor.

She awkwardly shifted in her spot not sure how to start. “Um.. hey, so like Ms.LN said uh I’m here to help I guess teach you all about infected.”

Once her sentence ended the entire class erupted into chaos questions with a new one shouted after the other. Stepping in and calming them down a kid named Liam raised his hand. “Is it true you almost killed a pregnant woman?”

“I uh” Abby stumbled on her words. “I highly doubt that has to do with killing infected”

“Liam, this is your last warning one more time and I’m having a talk with your mother” your threat only made the boy cower and Abby become flustered.

Calming her nerves she sighed, the important thing right now was to at least impress you. “I’ve killed people. I’ve killed infected and I’ve hurt alot of people.. a lot of them—

— and I think that’s it, unless you all have questions” Abby finally asked after her lecture. A few kids raised their hands asking important questions. The spotlight ended though once the bell rang.

“All-right everyone thats it, get out Go to lunch” You playfully yelled, saying goodbye to your students giving each their own smile. As the last one left you sat down on your desk, leaning on to Abby who still stood beside it. “They all like You”

“You think” she asked trying to ignore the growing blush on her cheeks.

“Yeah.. I know it” You mumbled taking her hand into yours. Kissing the back of her hand softly you rubbed her knuckles. “You’re coming to the party tonight right?”

Abby looked down at you embarrassed. “I mean I can, I know lev wants to go because he has this crush on a girl but I really wasn’t planing on going”

You kept quiet for a moment still holding her hand. “Well then if you’re not going, could I come by tonight and keep you company?” You sweetly asked.

If her face could of gotten redder it would of. “Yes!” She spoke a little to quickly causing you to laugh. “I’ll see you tonight Abby” you smiled looking up at her with a sense of admiration.

She nodded, awkwardly leaving the school house making you giggle.

————

You sat outside rocking gently on the swinging bench on Abby’s porch. The light from the party happening at the tavern light up the neighborhood.

“You like marshmallows right” Abby asked as she joined you on the bench, passing the cup of hot coco. You smiled taking the cup, taking a sip you let the sweet drink pass through your body.

Letting out a sigh of satisfaction you faced the blonde again. You took the quilt off your body passing it over Abby’s as well, wanting to share the body heat.

“So” you started, turning to face Abby. “You’ve been here for a year now, your hair has grown out into a cute bob and you’ve put half the men here to shame with your muscles.. so I have to ask Ms. Anderson, do You like someone?”

Abby sub consciously reached to her hair that rested just bellow her chin, she normally kept it in a bun though tonight a few strands weren’t wanting to cooperate. She cleared her throat not sure how to respond. “I guess so” she managed out. “I mean I do like this girl but I doubt she’d like be back”

“And Why’s That” You asked leaning into her. “And it’s a girl? Is this you coming out to me Abby” you softly teased.

“Shut up” she chuckled. “Yes it’s a woman and yes I guess technically this is me telling you I like women, more then men at least”

“And Why do You think she doesn’t like you?” You set your cup on the table in front of you before laying your head on your arms on the back of the bench.

Abby just sighed. “Well for starters shes Just beautiful, I mean really she’s just… wow— you know” she smiled sweetly at her mug.

“Yeah?” You playfully flirted.

“Oh yeah, I mean she’s just astonishing, and the nicest woman I’ve ever met. She holds herself with such confidence and grace that honestly she was probably royalty in another life” Abby continued with a foolish smile that was eventually replaced with a more remorseful look. “But I did some not so ok stuff in my past, and if she found out I don’t think she could ever look at me the same”

“Like What?” You asked not thinking that it could be any worse than anyone else. “We’ve all killed people abs, whatever you did it couldn’t of been that bad”

Abby hesitated, to tell you meant telling you all the bad shit she’s done. Closing her eyes she let out a deep breath before speaking.

“I beat a man to death with a golf club because he killed my dad and took away the only man who could of made a cure for the infection then his brother and some girl came after me, killed all my friends. I slept with my friends boyfriend, I shot the brother of the man I killed and beat the girl almost to death, I almost killed her pregnant girlfriend and shot this guy who was with them then I left the group I was with at the time and ran away with lev”

The silence was over whelming. She squeezed her cup in shame regretting even opening her mouth. The silence was replaced however with laughter. Finally looking up Abby looked over seeing how you laughed like nothing happened.

You continued to silently giggle before leaning your head back, looking over at Abby you gave her a dumb smile. “Really? That’s it?”

She just looked at you confused. How could you be so laid back after she told you something so traumatic. “Abby why would I ever care about you killing someone? So what you killed a man that killed your dad, sounds fair. You also got vengeance for your friends, again sounds fair; though the sleeping with your friends boyfriend I’m not sure about that”

Abby felt her face turn red. Looking back down embarrassing she fumbled her words trying to explain. “Look it wasn’t like that, we dated when we were kids and it ended messily. We got into an argument and were just mad at each-other and the only way to express our feelings was through actions, I regretted it and it was honestly shit I hated it the entire time”

“Well as Long as you regret it then I guess there isn’t a problem” you chuckled, leaning over you tucked a stray strand of Abby’s hair behind her ear.

Subconsciously Abby felt herself leaning into you, she held her breath- not wanting the moment to end. You followed her lead tilting your head into hers.

After a short second you smiled “just kiss me already” the was the last thing spoken before Abby crashed herself into you.

Her hands instantly finding themselves on your hips and in your hair, wanting to ground herself in anyway she could. A years worth of sexual and romantic tension building up being poured out all into one kiss.

In response you picked your body up, leaning into Abby you pressed yourself against her, slowly making your way into her lap. With your knee between Abby’s legs and the once heavy quilt now falling off you both you pulled away. Breathing heavily with your lips still close you muttered against her skin “wanna take this inside?”

She quickly agreed following your lead inside, leaving everything else behind the only thing that mattered was having you both against each other. With the door shut you locked your hands into Abby’s hair, kissing her once again.

While the messy kiss continued the stronger woman helped lift you off the ground causing you to wrap your legs around her waist. With her hands on your Ass abby carried you upstairs and to her room.

Once there she gently tossed you on the bed. With how much she’s had to hear about your hookup story’s and how you wish they’d man handle you more often she had a fake sense of confidence going through her body.

You threw your shirt aside, quickly making due with the bra. The confidence broke once Abby realized this was her first time with a woman. Her first time really ever since Owen. Wanting to curl up in embarrassment Abby looked away from your breast.

You laughed noticing her shyness and the distant look of doom. “Don’t worry.. it’s not as difficult as you think” pulling her down by her shirt you gave Abby a gentle, reassuring kiss. “We’ll take it slow”

Abby just nodded, shaking the feeling away she slowly stripped off her shirt, trying to hold the intimate eye contact.

Both taking turns, each stripping out of their clothes until you both were naked all while holding eye contact. You ran a hand up Abby’s chest, giving her sensitive breast a gentle squeeze she moaned, deep and raspy.

“You make me feel good baby and I’ll make you feel like nothing else exist” you mumbled while kissing Abbys neck. She moaned in response, laying on the bed she started to kiss and grab down your body. Every piece of skin that she could touch she loved. From your collarbones, nipples and to your stomach she sweetly kissed.

You took a hand, lacing it into Abby’s now messed up hair. Once she reached between your thighs she was already on her knees admiring what laid between.

“God” she groaned tucking her face into your plush thigh. Kissing it softly she slowly made her way towards your soaking cunt. Your stomach tensed, the teasing feeling of her lips dragging across your skin only riling you up more.

Moving her head towards your core by her hair you let out a small whine. “Please”

You opened your eyes to look down at her, she hadn’t even touched you yet but she was already so pussy drunk. You loosened your grip on her hair as she finally brought herself to you.

She gave a kitten lick on your swollen clit, slightly insecure of her skills before actually placing herself onto your sensitive skin.

Slowly sucking on the bud Abby kept the eyecontact with you, feeling herself getting off with the faces and noises you made. Without realizing it she slid two fingers into you.

“Oh fuck, Just like That Abby” Your stomach tensing up as your chest followed your rapid breaths. You clamped your thighs around Abby’s head not sure how much more you could take. Moaning her name you started to grind your hips on her face. The smell of sex quickly over taking your senses.

With your eyes shutting and your back arcing pushing your cunt onto Abby’s tongue, chasing your high; your legs started to shake as your orgasm crashed over your body.

Relaxing and allowing Abby to pull away from you, you looked down at her with a slight chuckle. Her face red and her pupil’s dilated. “You look beautiful” You smiled tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

“You’re one to talk” she grinned in response, kissing you, the taste of yourself in her tongue taking over. You sat up moving back towards the bed frame before laying down again.

“Here” you gestured to your lips. Both still breathless, Abby looked at you confused until it hit her what you were signaling.

It was cute how nervous she was. Straddling your body she bent down giving you a kiss. You let out a muttered moan wrapping your arms around her. While you gently rubbed Abby’s body you helped move her up towards your lips.

Letting her grab the headboard you forced her hips down. Abby was sweet, sweeter than you expected. Her small whines and grunts made you feel like you were going insane. She was just perfect.

You ran your tongue in rhymathic circles, squeezing Abby’s thighs wanting to bring her closer if it was even possible. Her moans. Her taste. Her skin. Everything about her was perfect.

You could tell she was close, from how she gripped the board to her scrunched up face. Her moans becoming louder up until the point she held her head back.

Abby was inexperienced it was obvious from her body language, her finishing faster than you would of thought was kind of expected.

Trying to help brace her body while she came down from her orgasm you helped Move her beside you, you both just looked at one another not wanting the moment to end.

Giving her a subtle kiss on the cheek you sat up, letting out a deep breath you smiled down at Abby who was softly rubbing your arm. You could of gone for a few more rounds but Abby really just wanted to lay down. Maybe another time

After making a shower for you both and getting a drink you laid on Abby’s chest, enjoying how her stronger arms made you feel secure. Softly kissing her neck you smiled against her skin. “I love you Anderson”

Though you weren’t looking at her you could tell her face was red. “Yeah— I uh i love you to” she managed back, her arm growing tighter around you.

#lesbian #wlw #abby anderson fluff #abby anderson smut #abby anderson tlou2 #abby the last of us #abby tlou #abby x reader #abby anderson x reader #tlou fluff #tlou smut #tlou2 #tlou fanfiction #the last of us fanfiction

333 notes · View notes

plutonianeris · 9 months

Text

pick a pile: how does this new love feel like a fairytale? ⛓️💗

this is a general reading so take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Interpret & choose based on your inner guidance and gut feeling. messages can be either from you, them or both🍒

𓆩♱𓆪Pile one

right off the bat this is someone whose been eyeing you for a while. they could be the type that stare in awe at the pictures you post on social media “so pretty” or when they met you that have that immediate attraction.. “who is that?” lol them asking their friends when you walk in. this honestly feels like a fairytale because theyve been wanting you for a while but theyve been super patient i heard “no hard feelings” theyre actually so sweet (im getting water sign suns: cancer, pisces, scorpio energy oop 🙈).

like they have no problem admiring you from afar at alllll. they are mesmerized by you. and honestly they could have been a little toxic before meeting you (not abusive, but someone unable to share their emotions in a healthy way). it seems like they dont want u to see them in the shades and shadows of their trauma, wounds, healing. for them you are the light at the end of that tunnel. i heard “my day was pretty shitty until you showed up” they are willing to work hard for you. they are also very attractive & in an unconventional way (unique hair, being really tall, tattoos, something like that makes them stand out especially in their friend group).

💌letter from their pov;

I know you dont need me. you dont really look like the type to depend on anyone. I can see it in the way you eye people, especially men, with suspicion. you question my motives and thats fair. when youre that beautiful and charming, theres bound to be people that just want to use you. that are dying to be in you energy just to get the chance to say they were in your presence. i dont wanna be like that. i dont wanna be another read message in your phone. i dont wanna be another face that disappears in the crowd for you. and i know you feel that way too. that the worst thing for you isnt to be talked about. its to be ignored. its to be underestimated. trust me when i say since the moment i laid eyes on you, i never once doubted you. i know you are capable of bringing men to their knees with your eyes. i know that your laugh makes my pulse speed up. i know that you make me feel special. and sometimes i get jealous, wondering if you make other people feel that way too. I want to give you the whole world if you just let me.

𓆩♱𓆪Pile two

this new love feels like a fairytale because this happened in the moment when you’re least expecting it and also after you’re recovering from something. Whether it be a relationship break up with a partner or you just changing things in your life, like moving to a different neighborhood or no longer believing in certain things that were very important in your belief systems in the past. this is like a prince or princess, waiting to rescue you. At first, though it seems like you’re suspicious of this energy. You could find that they are way too good with their words. “too good to be true” “I bet you say that to all the girls/guys” energy. but honestly, it seems like you’re the only one that can keep up with them. You don’t give into them like other people do, and they constantly want to impress you by telling you random facts or teaching you about some thing they learned abroad or when traveling.

I am getting a sense that they are very flirty, but with other people it never goes past that it’s just something they do in the moment or theyre just really playful. But even as they’re talking to someone else, their eyes can’t seem to leave you even if you’re across the room. You like your routine and consistency so changing things about your own life is hard, much less accepting other people in. So when they flirt with you, you might not immediately flirt back. you might roll your eyes, but you can’t help but smile when they turn away. you could be someone with earth placements, especially capricorn or virgo. They give off a lot of mischievous energy. This other person could have a gemini placement, third house placements or ninth house placements (if ur into astro).

💌letter from their pov;

Relationships have never really been a priority for me. I mean, cmon I'm young. Isn't it the whole point to experience as much as I can? I know other people have things to say about me.. maybe I lead some people on. Maybe sometimes you feel that way too. But I promise it's not really like that. Well, with you, it isn't. I'm just inexperienced. And I guess that doesn't really stop me from flirting so much and being so cocky…But the truth is I crave your attention badly. You look like you really know what you want in life. And for me, that's all I ever wanted. Because when you know what you want, you get it. and thats when you really start living. After that, even our mistakes are our own and beautiful and intimate in their own way. I see the weariness in your eyes when you look at me. I know you're wondering if I am even worth your time. I promise I am. I promise I can be. And if I'm not, then you can just never speak to me right then and there, I swear. But I know there's more than weariness in your gaze as well. I know you are just as curious about me as I am about you.

𓆩♱𓆪Pile three

This love feels like a dark romance. This pile is not as lighthearted as the previous two at all. It feels like a fairytale in that "magical" sense though because it will feel like love at first sight. You both will feel immediately physically attracted to the other but what makes it even more intense is that at first no one seems to be able to make the first move. It might seem too good to be true to the point where you don't even wanna disturb the "illusion." You dont wanna burst the bubble. Also, the magnetic attraction you feel/ that slow burn makes it even more desirable for both of you. In synastry, you both might have a lot of conjunctions (especially with pluto, moon, and mars). I also pulled north node synastry as well (and this synastry makes it feel like you're meant to be aka its destiny. but its also uncomfortable). "I have never felt like this before" energy.

Honestly, I see this pile as being able to go both ways and it can easily make you feel heartbroken. You might have venus-pluto placements yourself or 8th house placements or they do. When you are together though, you both hate when other people interrupt. You love your alone time. It feels really good. This pile is all about intense eye contact, glancing down at each others lips, meeting in secret, getting jealous when other people try to talk to the other, hands brushing as you walk but never fully touching. But then devouring each other when alone (if you both end up trusting each other when to get there because, again, one of you or both are hesitating). If you open your heart and learn to trust and communicate in a healthy manner, it could be a life changing connection.

💌letter from their pov;

It feels wrong to fantasize about you the way I do. But I can't really help it. I think about the way your back would feel arched under my palm. your lips on mine, tongues meeting, teeth clashing. I look at your hands and imagine them gripping the sheets at the same time I grip your thighs. It feels wrong that these are things that have crossed my mind since I first met you. sometimes I try to lie to myself. Tell myself that maybe im not really that into you. but its such bullshit. even then, theres the what if. what if. what if. it looks like every odds are against us. we are complete opposites. it might never work. but im willing to take that risk. im willing to bet on us. even if it falls apart. but judging from the way you freeze up when we make eye contact I know its far beyond that. I know you felt it too. the day we met, how you paused. i know that we would love hard. and fall harder. and if it doesnt work out, it would be devastating. and yet, i would still decide to do it all over again. and you would too. life is too short. I dont want us to be a what-if.

428 notes · View notes

senualothbrok · 6 months

Note

I was Inspired by that lovely fanart of waking up next to Gale, so...

Gale might have told you that waking up next to you was the most unreal part of your adventures--particularly that morning, after he'd defied a goddess and you all defied the odds and came out, alive and un-ceremorphosed, on the other side. You wonder, though, if the sense of unreality and awe that sweeps over you when you wake up first and watch him sleep isn't just as potent.

You're both more than a bit wrecked from your lovemaking the previous night. Gale's hair is a glorious, disordered mess on the pillow, a sloppy tapestry of darker brown, bronze, and silver. That ever-animated face and body are, for once, at peace--you've worn him out so thoroughly, you think with more than a little smugness, he can't even murmur or twitch his way through dreams. The bare chest you'd so adoringly marked with your teeth and fingers rises and falls, a drowsy metronome whose pulse you follow as your gaze wanders down his belly, the dip of his flank, to where a sleepy hand had pushed the covers down to his hip. That ever-present hunger in your belly stirs, a prompting to push those covers down or slide a hand underneath them, but it's at best a suggestion; for once, you might be sated, just drinking your fill of him lying here like this.

He has one hand tucked underneath his head, an oddly shy and childlike thing; the other rests on the mattress between you. Like the rest of him it's quiescent, elegant fingers resting like a benediction on the sheets. A few fine hairs dust the back of it, not enough to hide the sculpture of bone and tendon underneath, a work of art you never tire of appreciating.

The air around you is sleepy and slow, and through the tower window you can hear the sea's endless murmur Gale sighs softly and stirs, that hand reaching for you--it's so easy, so easy, to slide your fingers into his, to smile as he settles and shifts a little closer. You could lie here for the rest of the morning, the rest of the day, cloaked in peace.

What, you think, is eternity, compared to this?

Hello friend! Thank you so much for this, and sorry it has taken me so long... This was such a beautiful scene, and it was so lovely and warm thinking about it. ***

His eyelids flutter, dancing towards wakefulness. His eyes open slowly, a brown-bronze river which sways then stills. You gaze at each other, cocooned in silent contentment, echoing each other’s breaths. Your thumb circles the back of his hand like a rosary bead. His drowsy lips curl.

“Are you enjoying the view?”

You laugh, a husky rasp, your throat still recovering from last night’s exertions. “Always.”

He hums as you trace the curves of his temple, the cut of his cheek, the nook of his collarbone.

“It’s quite flattering, to be admired by someone whose beauty so dwarfs your own.”

His free hand cups the indent of your hip, warm and heavy. Claiming you as his.

You huff a little. “It isn’t a competition.” You nibble at his shoulder, savouring the bristle of his beard against your skin. “Besides, there’s perfection in imperfection.”

“Oh?” A flare of mischief in his languid features. “What imperfections in me are you referring to?”

You tickle his nose with yours. Even after all this time, his breath still catches when you draw near. Your lips seek his, a flurry of affection you cannot control, the sting of his morning breath reminding you that this is not a dream. He is reluctant, groaning faintly as you draw back. You weave lazily through his ruffled fringe.

“These.” You linger on the silver streaks that flicker across his earth brown waves. “I love these.”

“Do you?” His eyes beam, but shadows lurk beneath. Gale has always been confident in his appearance, but he is not immune to fears of aging.

“I do. I always have.”

Your fingers follow the tousled strands that tumble onto his forehead, chiselling the deep lines that accent his brow. You marvel at every groove, every trace of Gale’s tireless thoughts, bearing the weight of his wisdom. Marks of his sincerity. Those most priceless of treasures.

“And these,” you whisper. “These might be my favourite.”

His gaze is an embrace, but there is a grimace in his smile.

“You might be the only fan of those.”

Your heart is like the tide as you gather his face in your hands. It swells as you plant a kiss between his eyebrows, firm and fervent. His eyelashes tingle against your cheek as he sighs and pulls you against him.

“I love everything about you,” you breathe, before you melt into each other.

#gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #drabble tennis

156 notes · View notes

danikamariewrites · 1 year

Note

Could you do one with Xaden where reader gets hurt during training and he almost loses his shit? I can totally see him and Sygael, along with readers dragon of course, wanting to find the person who hurt them and burn them to a ✨crisp✨ lol.

Gotta have your daily protective and caring shadow boy lol

Injured

Xaden x reader

A/n: not me expanding the No One Left Behind universe (like that’s a thing lol) Cadmus is a beast in this one, he is taking no one’s shit. That sweet puppy dog dragon is gone for now.

Warnings: canon typical violence, mentions of injuries

Sgaeyl had told Xaden what happened seconds before Liam came and got him, panting and out of breath only wheezing out your name. He was now out pacing Liam on the way to the infirmary.

Amon had once again pulled a dangerous stunt during flight training. Flight training. The one time of day no sparring was supposed to happen. Xaden wanted to kill the little prick. He went too far this time and Xaden was at his limit with giving Amon chances.

Pushing the doors open Xaden scans the beds looking for you. His eyes find you on a bed on the far right of the room. You looked pissed as you messed with the bandage around your hand and arm.

You didn’t notice him until he was sitting next to you on the bed, gently taking your hand in his so you’d stop picking at the wraps. You looked up at him and you were fuming.

Xaden scanned your face taking in your injuries. There were cuts all over your face and dried blood coming from your nostrils and smattered on your nose. A nasty bruise went from your temple to your jaw. Xaden picked up the wet cloth on the bedside table, gently wiping the blood from your face.

“You ok sweetheart?” You flopped back on the bed letting out an agitated sound. “I swear I’m going to kill Amon next time I see him.” Xaden wanted to laugh but this wasn’t a joke. “Can I leave yet? I hate the smell in here.”

Xaden nodded, helping you up as you winced from the shooting pain in your ribs. As you walked to Xaden’s room you told him about what happened at flight training. Amon and his poorly behaved dragon attacked you and Cadmus in an impromptu fighting exercise.

Cadmus was thankfully unharmed and went on the offensive quicker than you could tell him to. You had never seen or heard him so pissed off, or using so many swear words. He was so well mannered. Of course Cadmus got Sgaeyl involved, who told Xaden immediately.

“Would it make you feel better to know they’re currently plotting their revenge on Amon?” You let out a laugh, relaxing on Xaden’s soft black covers. “Yes actually. I’d love to see Cadmus lose his mind. Is that why he cut me off?”

You spent that night in Xaden’s arms as he whispered loving words and promises of protecting you, never letting anything like this happen again.

The next afternoon you heard about the beating Xaden gave Amon during morning training. It was so bad Dain had to step in and pull Amon away from Xaden while Garrick, Liam, and Imogen had to restrain him.

Once Amon recovered you were both back at flight training. Xaden was overseeing your squad for the time being, just to make sure Amon understood his death threats were serious.

You had never seen Cadmus look so terrifying, it also didn’t help that he and Sgaeyl were next to each other glowering at anyone who looked at them. Even you were scared to approach him until you heard his voice in your head. “We’re just making sure we get our point across. It’s ok, I’d never hurt you y/n.”

You smile up at him and mount in the saddle, preparing for take off. Xaden mounted after you shooting you a grin once in his saddle.

Looking out at the field you saw Amon. Gods he looked awful. Xaden really did a number on him. “Sgaeyl showed me. It was wonderful, I’d never been so happy to see a fight.” He let out a huff which you took as his laugh.

Once up in the air Cadmus insisted you stay at the back. Just in case anyone tries to attack so he could be ready this time. You weren’t fully convinced by his tone but went with it anyway. Who were you to question the wisdom of a century old dragon?

About an hour in you had a feeling Cadmus was up to something. The squad was flying over a mountain pass you usually avoided because it was a third year course. And Sgaeyl was slowly making her way next to Cadmus.

They gave each other a look that made you and Xaden panic. Then they started to climb at an alarming rate. Their wings beating loudly as wind rushed past you, making you flatten yourself to the saddle. “Cadmus!” You yelled at him. “What are you doing?” “Doing what I should’ve done in the first place.”

Oh shit. That wasn’t good. You thought Xaden was joking when he said they were plotting. Looking down you noticed the other dragons had peeled off, leaving Amon alone to hover over the pass.

Passing each other, Sgaeyl and Cadmus dove for them. Amon’s dragon took the offensive too late and Cadmus got a chunk of his side, biting down hard enough causing the dragon let out an ear piercing shriek.

Letting go he flapped away best he could but Sgaeyl was ahead corralling him. Cadmus let out a roar that you’d never heard from him before. It shook the world around you causing your grip to tighten on him.

Unhinging his jaw as wide as he could, Cadmus let out a gust of flame in Amons direction. His dragon flailed and Sgaeyl went for its eyes. They started dropping fast, his dragon going lifeless. Unfortunately, one of Amon’s friends brought him on his dragon before the loud thud of the dragons body echoed around the mountains.

You couldn’t look away. In awe of what just happened. At least Amon would be a little less dangerous from Now on.

Later that night you were sitting in front of the hearth in the common room staring into the crackling flames as you went over the days events again. You couldn’t stop hearing the echoing thud or the silence from Amon as his dragon died. The way he felt nothing for the thing he was connected too didn’t sit right with you.

Xaden silently approached letting his shadows softly caress you to alert you to his presence. “Hey sweetheart.” You hum acknowledging him. Sitting down, he kisses you on your head. He places a hand on your back to comfort you. “Thinking about today?”

“Yeah.” You said absentmindedly. “I’m not upset they did that. I mean, I am a little. A warning would’ve been nice.” You both let out a chuckle. “Did you know?” “No.” You believe him from the seriousness of his tone.

“What’s still bothering you?” “How Amon didn’t care. At least that’s what it looked like to me. I’d be distraught if that was Cadmus.” Xaden wrapped his arm around your shoulders, resting his head on yours. “I know. He’s a psychopath. But we’ll see what happens.”

You let out another hum, relaxing into his warmth. At least you were safe in the skies now.

tags: @nyotamalfoy @auggiesolovey @bubybubsters @baybay123455 @msiecrane @aroseinvelaris @twsssmlmaa

#fourth wing #fourth wing fanfic #xaden fourth wing #xaden riorson #Xaden riorson fourth wing #xaden fourth wing x reader #xaden fanfic #xaden riorson x reader #Xaden x reader #Xaden x you

427 notes · View notes

recreationalfanfics · 2 years

Note

Hello sweetcheeks If you don't mind whether I can request Shiva, Hades, Hercules and Tesla with the very beautiful goddess S/O whose beauty even exceeds Aphrodite, S/O is very elegant and friendly to humans on earth. S/O also really loves immortals. You can freely ignore my request, don't forget to take care of your health and always drink water

Again, I only really follow the anime so I'm only writing for Shiva and Hercules but either way, I hope you like it!

Shiva (+ Wives):

- He loves you and all his wives equally, and while you were recently added into the relationship BUT TRUST ME WHEN I SAY THAT YOU NEVER FEEL LEFT OUT, not when Shiva himself has to keep all four of his arms wrapped around you just because Parvati, Kali, and Durga HAVE BEEN HOGGING YOUR ATTENTION ALL DAY.

- Shiva is so proud to show you off to the other gods, honestly. Making them all jealous and inflating his own ego a bit more.

- He doesn't just show you off, he likes to show off for you. When he's playfully fighting another God then he'll be sure to really flex his muscles and put on a show for you and wink, making you all shy and flustered which is ADORABLE in his eyes.

- He also doesn't just love you for your looks of course, your heart is so incredibly kind and loving. Which contrasts very nicely to his recklessness and sometimes violent side. He smiles seeing you with his son because you always uplift him and treat him like any mother would with their child.

- HE ALSO LOVES TO DANCE WITH YOU AND SO DO HIS WIVES. Like, they invite you and you stun them with your gracefulness and elegance, such poise and control in your steps.

- You were absolutely enchanting, even by a God's standards and everyday, Shiva is just in awe of you. When he's bored and lazy, he asks you if you can dance with him and gives you big puppy eyes to convince you so you roll your eyes and stand up and he gets all happy.

- Your love for humans can lead to...conflicts. Like, he already knew it and he found it odd but endearing but he still has his own opinions about them and they're not very good until Ragnarok happens.

- But, like, when the God's vote for humanity's execution and you're horrified at how they could all be so cruel, Shiva just genuinely can't wrap his head around it but he'll comfort you, a bit guiltily.

- So there is a gap in which you need space from them because its an important topic and while all couples fight, it feels colder in his home because he and everyone else misses you so much.

- NO BUT ALSO, LIKE, AFTER HIS FIGHT, HE STARTS TO SEE WHY YOU LIKE THEM AND HE APOLOGIZES and you're just concerned because HIS ARMS ARE LITERALLY FUCKED UP and you just dote on him.

- Ngl, his wives kinda hate him for a bit now (not actually) because while you help him recover, he acts like a big baby just so you can comfort him and coddle him and give him all your attention and shooting his wives a smug smirk as they roll their eyes but smile as you take care of him because it feels so nice to have you back.

Hercules:

- PLEASE YOU TWO ARE LITERALLY A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN, LIKE, YOU GUYS ARE LEGIT THE SWEETEST COUPLE EVER😭

- The fact that he used to be human was what drew you to him, like, Ares and the other Greek gods were celebrating and Ares is all: "Woah, (Y/n)'s been looking at you the entire time." and Loki bitterly pouts: "Ugh, of course the human turned God caught her attention right off the bat."

- Hercules doesn't understand why they were making a big deal and turned around to see you...only to make direct eye contact with you and immediately getting all shy and flustered. You greeted him with such warmness and you talked about what it was like for him to become a God, then he started to talk about his life as a human.

- And unlike other gods who side eyed him or looked down on him, your eyes were filled with such wonder and awe at him. You had so many questions for humanity and the way you seemed to be fascinated with them makes it so clear to Hercules that you truly do have a passion for humanity just like him.

- THE OTHER GODS THINK YOU'RE SO WEIRD FOR IT BUT YOU GUYS DON'T CARE, he answers your questions about humanity and even takes you back to his home when he visits his friends and they're ALL STUNNED BY YOU.

- "I-Is that Aphrodite!?" and you just look at them and smile and their hearts beat 10x faster as you're all: "Aw, you humans truly are too kind. I am not the Goddess of Love, I am the Goddess of (insert what you want to be the Goddess of)."

- Your elegance also compliments his strength and almost brutish build, one thing you absolutely adore about Hercules is despite his strength, he always treats you so gently and is always mindful of his strength when he's with you.

- PLEASE HE ABSOLUTELY LOVES TO CARRY YOU ADMIRE YOUR BEAUTIFUL FORM, NO MATTER YOUR BODY TYPE, YOU ARE THE MOST PERFECT THING HE HAS EVER SEEN.

- No because when he volunteers to fight for the God's, you were confused but he explains why he's doing it and you just supporting him and having nothing more than the utmost confidence that he can guide the God's into seeing their wrongs.

#record of ragnarok x reader #ror hercules x reader #ror shiva x reader #shiva x reader #hercules x reader #shuumatsu no valkyrie x reader

1K notes · View notes

peachsukii · 7 months

Note

Im in love with your writing and I was wondering if I could get a scenario with Deku, Bakugo, and Todoroki (if you want to ofc-) with a s/o who gets into a fight with another student about whatever and does that cool but scary angry grin? Take your time! ^^

aw thank you so much! i'm so happy you enjoy it. :) thank you for the suggestion, anon! hope you like it!! ♡

『♡』 fem!reader x midoriya / bakugo / todoroki ��➤ ꒰ how the boys would react to reader getting into a fight ꒱ -`✧ all the boys are aged to 18 & senior year of UA

☆ Izuku Midoriya ☆

Monday morning! Everyone's not so favorite day of the school week. You were still recovering from the previous week - back to back tests stacked on top of physical quirk training. It was exhausting, two days off wasn't enough to fully recover. You're not too proud of how irritable you are this morning, but it's to be expected. You make your way into the building and see Midoriya waiting for you, a can of your favorite energy drink in hand. "Good morning, y/n! I know we were up late all last week, I figured you could use a pick me up this morning," he greets, extending the drink to you. "Aw, thanks Zu, that's so sweet of you," you say cheerfully as you take the drink from him. Someone you didn't recognize scoffs near by, catching your attention as she leans to the person next to her and whispers, "What a desperate loser Midoriya is, chasing after her like a lost puppy." Little did she know you had excellent hearing. You swing your head in her direction, glaring daggers immediately. Stomping over, you stand with fists balled at your side. "You wanna say that again?" you growl, daring her to repeat her mistake. She scowls and take a step closer to get in your face. "Midoriya's a desperate loser chasing after you like a lost -" She's cut short when you shove her into the shoe lockers, thrusting her up against the row with a loud thud. Your lips curl into a snarl, tilting your head sideways. "A lost what?" Midoriya scrambles to your side, a hand on your shoulder to pull you away from the confrontation. “Y/N, it’s not worth it!” He pleads, putting his hands up in defense. “Don’t worry about it! I’m not upset.” “Keep your bitch in check, Midoriya,” the girl’s friend snarks, a cheshire grin spreading across her lips. The energy shifts as you look in Midoriya’s direction, catching a glimpse of the fire behind his emerald irises. He lowers his hands, taking a deep breath while relaxing his shoulders. ”Don’t you dare talk about her like that. Understand?” You’ve never heard his voice sound like that - so…assertive. You loosen your grip on the girls uniform jacket, letting her slip out of your grasp. “Whatever.” The girls leave you and Midoriya while a crowd of others turn their eyes away from the scene. You can’t help the exasperated sigh that escapes you, frustrated at your shitty start to the morning. He takes your arm gently and guides you toward your joint homeroom class. ”Let’s skip studying tonight, we’ll go get crepes instead. My treat!”

☆ Katsuki Bakugo ☆

After classes ended for the day, you and Bakugo decide to do your typical training regimen outside. It was a beautiful spring day - why waste it by staying inside? The two of you make your way to the training grounds, tossing your bags down and stretching in the grass. Another group of students appear and make their way to the other side of the training grounds. It wasn't uncommon to share the grounds, so you don't pay any mind to them. You begin warming up by jogging around the perimeter of the grounds together at a steady pace. By the time you circle back around, you're starting to get hot and unzip your gym uniform jacket, leaving it hang open for the breeze to brush against your skin. You're black sports bra becomes visible and it exposes your midsection, but covers more than the average bathing suit. You wear it all the time and Bakugo isn't bothered by it. He could care less what you wear to work out in as long as you worked hard. "Can I bother you to get this one knot out of my shoulder? I can't seem to shake it," you ask him, rolling your shoulder while wincing. "Think I pulled it during quirk training last week." "Fine, but you gotta be more careful, idiot. Gonna end up shredding your muscles before ya even get to be a pro," Bakugo scolds as he walks over to you. "Where is it?" You point to the spot on your shoulder blade as you discard your jacket, letting it fall to your elbows. He grips your opposite shoulder to hold you in place as he digs his thumb into the spot, roughly rubbing in circles to loosen the knot. He places his palm over the aching muscle after a few minutes and lightly activates his quirk, warming the area to help with the pain. You sigh with relief, the heat helping immediately melt the tension away. A few of the students from the other group approach you two, staring at you with disgust. "Get a damn room, you two. We're trying to focus," the one girl says annoyed, hands on her hips. "And do us all a favor, cover the hell up. No one wants to see you flirt with this jackass." "You really came all the way over here to bitch at me instead of just minding your business?" you argue, pulling your jacket back onto your shoulders. "Sounds like a you problem." She takes a step toward you and pushes you backwards, sending you tumbling into Bakugo. It catches you off guard, but you immediately use the momentum of his hands catching you to reverse the force and knock yourself back into her. She stumbles, attempting to take a swing at you and failing miserably as she falls to the ground. Bakugo barks out a laugh. "If it's a fight yer lookin' for, might wanna think twice." It's hard to ignore the sound of sparks fizzling from his palms, knowing he's definitely pissed she put her hands on you, despite his reaction. "Knock it off! Let's get out of here," her friend huffs, reaching her hand out to help her off the ground. She smacks her hand away, crawling to her feet on her own. "Hope to see you in the sports festival this year!" you call mockingly as they scurry away. "Really hopin' you get paired with her so you can kick her ass."

☆ Shoto Todoroki ☆

"Seriously?" you whine, staring at the empty space on the counter in the cafeteria. A girl nearby you cackles to herself, shooting a dirty look your way. "Should have been faster!" she yells, mocking your disappointment. You furrow your brows at her. This has happened every single day for the last two weeks - she takes your favorite snack (sometimes multiples) to purposefully throw it in the trash in front of you. "Why the hell do you have it out for me?!" you ask, frustrated as you shove your tray onto the counter. She tosses her hair over her shoulder, turning her nose up at you. "I'm doing you a favor, y/n. Only winners get what they want." She must have been referring to the sparring match you had last week against Ochaco. It's not your fault your hand to hand combat needs work - that's what school is for. "Fine, let me fight you for it," you say casually. "I'll win it from you." She lets out that stereotypical anime villain laugh. "I'd like to see you try!" And you do. You strut over and smack the tray from her hands, causing it to clatter to the ground. Your eyes are locked on hers, assessing her like a predatory identifying it's prey in the wild. "What the hell's your problem?!" she yells, putting her hands up in a panic. "What? You said try, so here I am." As you're staring her down, Todoroki walks up and casually stands next to you. "Y/N, I saved you a seat," he says nonchalantly. "Come sit with me." You scoff, rolling your eyes at the girl and how pathetic she looks, cowering at your actions that she dared you to do. "Fine." You follow Todoroki back to the table and sit down, pouting about losing your favorite snack for the umpteenth time. "You shouldn't be fighting over food, y/n," he voices quietly. "That's not worth the potential punishment." You sigh. "Yeah, yeah. I know, Sho." He then pulls something out of his bag from the floor, placing it on the table in front of you. "Here. I picked something up for you." Like magic, your favorite snack is presented on the table. Your eyes light up, ecstatic that he saved one just for you. "Aw Sho, this is so nice of you! Thank you!"Little did you know, Todoroki bought the entire tray with Endeavor's credit card, ensuring that you get your favorite snack for the next few days without being bullied over it. "Sure."

i hope this was sufficient & enjoyable!!

#☆.from the stars #katsuki bakugo #izuku midoriya #shoto todoroki #x reader #bakugo x reader #deku x reader #todoroki x reader #deku x y/n #bakugo x y/n #todoroki x y/n #☆.rei writes

137 notes · View notes

supernaturalscribe67 · 3 months

Text

Eyes

Words: 8,052

POV: 3rd Person

Pairing: Castiel x Male!Winchester!Reader

Warning(s): Language, multiple character death, torture, TWD reference sprinkled in there, Lucifer being Lucifer, Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Animal Abuse (?) idk the butterfly isn't real, Castiel is the sweetest boyfriend known to man

Summary: The reader recently got Castiel back, and he has convinced himself that everything is back to normal, but the past has a tendency to haunt us, refusing to let go. What happens when the one person he loves more than life itself begins to remind him of the one that caused him the most pain?

Request:

Hi! I was wondering if you could do a Cas x winchester!reader(male and romantic) where Reader wakes up from a nightmare, Castiel is there to comfort them, but he refuses to tell Castiel what the nightmare was about.

After more and more repetitive nightmares every night, Cas finally got him to tell him what it was about. It turns out it was about readers' experience with Castifer. (I'm giving you free range with what happened)

The brothers can be there too, or they can be on a hunt, you choose. Thank you! I love your writing sm btw

Anonymous

A/N: It's been a while! In the course of writing this story, which consisted of 38 handwritten pages, we've had two staff members at work quit, leaving only two teachers in the entire center with a director who refuses to be in the classroom, so I've been working open-close, coming in early and staying late off the clock, and just trying to mentally recover over the weekend. Yay us :) I hope to get back in the groove of things now that this request is out of the way, as I knew I wanted it to be long enough to add the detail I had in mind. I hope I did your request justice and, as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

~ Much Love!

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

The woods near the bunker were beautiful. Tall, thick oaks decorated the skies above. Below sat wildlife. Squirrels scurried about to gather food, rabbits burrowed beneath the base of various tree trunks, robins collected sticks for their nests, and butterflies rested on wildflowers that grew on the spare patches of grass. It was a stunning forest to explore, one that (Y/N) and Castiel had walked through thousands of times, and with each instance, new beauties were presented. There was never a dull moment in nature, which was what the couple appreciated about it. Even the parts of the world that some would consider ugly were attractive to them, and they were loved even more.

They wandered through the woods as they normally did, hand in hand. Their eyes scanned every aspect of the ground below their feet and stopped to mention the most notable elements. One thing that caught (Y/N)’s eye and halted their walk altogether was a stray flower that had grown at the base of a towering oak tree. (Y/N) pulled Castiel to the flower and knelt on the ground to get a closer look. The petals were a soft white, painted with a dusting of woodchips, and the center was bright yellow. Just as (Y/N) was about to reach down and touch it, the quiet flutter of wings filled his ears.

Out of his peripherals flew a magnificent monarch butterfly. It took a moment to brush past his nose before it landed gracefully in the center of the flower. (Y/N) broke out into a large, bright smile as he glanced over at Castiel. He, too, had a smile, only his was softer. Slowly, Castiel reached his free hand forward, his index finger extended. The butterfly confidently climbed onto Castiel’s finger, as if they were old friends. When it was fully nestled in his hand, Castiel withdrew it and moved his hand so it rested between their bodies.

(Y/N) stared in awe at the closeness of the creature. The intricate detail on the wings, the way the antennae moved, the small size of its body, all of it was beautiful. Remarkable. A true gift to the universe. For a moment, (Y/N) looked up at Castiel, and he could feel the love in his heart. He was so kind and caring. A gentleman - angel if you will - and (Y/N) could not ask for a better lover.

Then his smile changed.

Instead of the peaceful grin he wore before, the corners of his lips curled into - need I say - a devilish smirk. In an instant, Castiel grabbed the butterfly’s wings between his index and middle finger and crushed them. (Y/N) opened his mouth and felt his throat contract, as if to gasp, but no sound came out. He looked up at Castiel’s eyes, and one thing that he noted was the fact that they were no longer the oceanic color he had grown fond of. They were dark, and gloomy, as if to represent an upcoming storm. When Castiel’s look shifted so their eyes connected, (Y/N) felt his stomach drop.

That wasn’t his Castiel.

“Pathetic little creatures, don’t you think?” He leered.

Lucifer.

(Y/N)’s chest rose and fell rapidly in tandem with his breaths. He wanted to run, to scurry away until he was out of sight, but he couldn’t find the strength in him to move. It was as if he was bound to the Earth, held captive by God himself. Lucifer chuckled.

“What’s wrong, (Y/N)? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” The voice didn’t belong to Castiel, despite wearing the same face.

(Y/N) tracked the movements of his hand - his familiar hand - as Lucifer reached over and brushed his fingers through his hair. Still, (Y/N) couldn’t move. Even his touch was different.

“Oh, how I’ve missed that look. It was so much fun to mess with you. So fun that I just had to come back. Did you miss me?” The last question came out barely above a whisper.

Still, (Y/N) said nothing. He failed to notice that the world around him had stopped, frozen in time. All he could focus on was the terror that reflected in Lucifer’s deep, dark eyes. The eyes of his lover. The lover who was no longer there.

“Oh, it doesn’t matter. The important thing is, now we’re back together! And, in this little dreamland of yours, you can’t get rid of me. No, you’re not strong enough to. Because all you see in front of you is your precious little Castiel, and why would you want to get rid of him, right?”

(Y/N) felt himself blink rapidly. No. He’s not real. Nothing is real. It was all fake, a trick his mind made up to make him suffer. His sick, twisted mind. All he had to do was wake up.

“Sick and twisted is a little harsh, don’t you think?” Lucifer smirked.

Wake up.

“Stay with me, come on,”

Wake up.

“Stay.”

Wake up!

*~*

(Y/N) gasped as he jolted upright. His heart pounded in his chest, eyes blown wide. A thick layer of sweat coated his brow. One good look at his surroundings and he could see he was no longer in the forest. He was in his room, in the bunker. He was safe.

A hand pressed against his shoulder, which caused him to jump and let out a shout of surprise. To his right, Castiel sat on the bed, worry hidden behind his electric blue eyes. Blue eyes. His eyes. The eyes he fell in love with. His safety. As suddenly as he awoke, his nerves calmed and he could feel his heartbeat regulate.

“Are you alright, (Y/N)?” Castiel spoke with his normal, gruff voice.

It’s Cas.

(Y/N) let out a shaky breath and gave a small nod. “Yeah, yeah, I’m okay. Just…had a bad dream.”

“I’m sorry, Bumblebee. Do you want to talk about it?” Castiel asked as he reached up and gently cupped (Y/N)’s cheek.

He leaned into the comfort of Castiel’s hand. The fear and stress washed away. He smiled a little wider. “It was just a hunting dream, nothing more.” He spoke softly as he reached a hand up to touch Castiel’s.

With a troublesome expression still on his face, Castiel gently grasped (Y/N)’s hand, brought it to his lips, and kissed his knuckles.

“Are you sure? You seemed rather bothered by it.”

“I’m positive.”

Castiel smiled sweetly. “Okay,” he whispered and placed a kiss on his forehead. “Would you like to sleep again? It’s still early, and Sam and Dean aren’t expected back for several more hours. I can hold you while you rest. Perhaps that’ll keep the nightmares at bay.”

(Y/N) opened his mouth to turn down the offer, but quickly shut it. The idea of being held in Castiel’s arms while he slept seemed to put him at ease. Maybe Castiel was right. There was a chance he could feel better that way. More at peace. Then his nightmares wouldn’t appear and, instead, they would be relaxing dreams. He missed those.

“I’d like that,” he said and laid back down on his side, facing Castiel.

Castiel lay beside him, mirroring his position, one arm wrapped under him and the other around his waist. (Y/N) laid his head on Castiel’s arm, nose brushed against his chest, and was instantly filled to the brim with warmth. In his arms, he felt protected, safe, and secure. The same security a child had when they were covered by their blanket.

Gingerly, Castiel placed a kiss on (Y/N)’s forehead. “Goodnight, my sweet Bumblebee.” As he spoke, it was as if his words dripped with love and adoration.

“Goodnight, my angel.” (Y/N) whispered.

*~*

Just as he was about to drift off into slumber, light kisses could be felt on the shell of his ear. Stubble tickled his neck and cheek, and he couldn’t help but grin tiredly.

“Cas, I’m trying to sleep,” his mumble sounded more like a whine as he let out hearty chuckles.

Kisses turned to nibbles at his protests, and he couldn’t hold back the giggles that erupted within him. (Y/N) tried to swat him away, but Castiel was persistent. After a moment, he began to trail sloppy kisses down his jawline, to his chin, then gave him a peck on his lips.

(Y/N) slowly opened his eyes and smiled up at him, but when Castiel pulled back and opened his own eyes, he was met with a familiar look of dark clouds.

“Thought you could get away from me that easily?” He asked.

(Y/N)’s smile vanished and his eyes widened. He swiftly pulled back from Lucifer’s grasp. In his getaway, his hand fumbled off the side of the bed and he fell to the floor. Instead of the concrete bunker floor he had expected, he landed on a soft dirt ground that was littered with natural debris. As he quickly looked around, he could see that he was back in the forest he had been in before he awoke. In any other situation, he would be full of peace in that setting. All he could feel, though, was a sense of dread.

Lucifer let out a deep chuckle that rumbled the Earth below. He moved to perch himself on the edge of the bed, feet planted on the ground on either side of (Y/N)’s body. The smirk on his face stood out as he looked down at him.

“(Y/N), you wound me! After all the time we spent together?” Lucifer pouted and placed a hand on his chest to feign hurt.

“You’re not real.” (Y/N) breathed.

Lucifer pursed his lips. “Pretty sure I am,” he nodded and stood from the bed so he towered over him. “Maybe I can get another kiss to figure it out.”

(Y/N) began to crawl backward, his eyes never leaving Lucifer’s. “No, no, no! This is all a dream! It’s all a dream. All I have to do is wake up again and you’ll be gone.”

“Oh, sweetheart, it’s so funny that you think you can run away again.”

“Fuck you!”

“Only if you want to.” Lucifer laughed.

(Y/N) sneered in disgust and finally pushed himself off of the ground. For a split second, his eyes left Lucifer, and, at that moment, he had vanished. His heart thumped to the beat of a thousand drums, and he swore he could hear it in his ears. He turned around completely in an attempt to find Lucifer, but he was nowhere to be found. Oddly enough, he found no comfort in his absence. With the forest as eerily quiet as it was, it was as if he was in the eye of the storm. That he could be hunted before he knew it.

And he wasn’t going to stick around for it.

His movements were slow at first as if he were covered in a thick layer of honey. Eventually, he gained momentum and began to rush through the maze of trees. Leaves under his feet crunched and branches cracked under the power of his steps. He did not know where he was headed, nor where he would end up, if anywhere, but all he knew was that he needed to get as far away from Lucifer as possible.

“You can run, but you can’t hide, (Y/N).” Lucifer’s sing-song voice echoed against the trees as if he were right on top of him.

He swore at any moment his heart would give out. If he thought about it too much, he was sure it would explode. He wouldn’t put it past Lucifer.

“Come out, come out, wherever you are.” He sounded closer, but that didn’t break (Y/N) out of his sprint. If anything, he went faster.

“I see you! Can you see me?” Lucifer laughed, and that caused the back of (Y/N)’s head to throb.

The corners of his vision started to blacken and his heart felt like it stopped. At once, his legs seized to function, and his feet scraped against the ground, not enough stamina in his body to lift them. It would prove to be his downfall as, seconds later, the tip of his foot caught on a protruding root. His whole body fell to the ground with a heavy thud.

(Y/N) felt drunk, as if his entire world spun rapidly. A soft groan fell from his lips and he opened his eyes, but he was met with nothing but darkness. He felt so helpless. So lost. So scared.

He had to wake up.

Footsteps echoed around him as if someone actively encircled his body. They stalked him, teased him, and filled his mind with thoughts that raced, too fast to comprehend. They made him want to run, but his blindness made it impossible.

Have to wake up.

Please wake up.

Then, he spoke.

“Waking up won’t do anything, you know. I’ll still be here, waiting.” Lucifer chuckled deeply.

Suddenly, Lucifer snapped his fingers, and (Y/N)’s vision was restored. They were back in the war room of the bunker. Lucifer, still clad in Castiel’s face, had his hands placed in the pockets of his trenchcoat. He began to circle (Y/N), as a predator would its prey, eyes trained on his.

“I’ll be trapped in your little dream world with nothing to do but twiddle my thumbs. That’s okay, though, because I know that, while you’re out there awake and somewhat alert, you’ll be thinking of me. Not only that, but you’ll see me, too.”

“No-” (Y/N) began weakly.

“Yes! You will,” Lucifer’s voice got louder, and the ground began to quake. “Because every time you look at your sweet angel Cassie, all you’ll see is me. All you’ll hear is me. All you’ll feel is me.”

“Cas is nothing like you.”

“Maybe not in terms of charms or amazing personality, but when it comes to looks, we are the same.” Lucifer slowly walked up and squatted down next to him. “While you lay in bed in Cassie’s arms, and you look up at him one more time to say goodnight, you won’t be able to think of anything but me.”

(Y/N)’s jaw clenched. “I won’t let you control me.”

Lucifer let out a low chuckle, deep enough to sound similar to a growl. “Oh, (Y/N). Sweet, sweet, (Y/N). It seems you’re mistaken,” he reached over, grabbed his chin, and lifted his head so their eyes met. “I already do.”

*~*

Another pothole, another curse from the eldest Winchester. Kansas backroads and highways were notorious for their terrible patchwork. The cities and counties would spend weeks on end filling any hole that had been reported only for their work to deteriorate after the next rainfall. It was all a ploy to get more money from taxpayers, and the Winchesters were glad they didn’t have to contribute to such a scam.

While most in the car sat jolted by the road conditions, nothing seemed to rouse (Y/N) from his slumber in the backseat, something Sam and Dean were jealous of. Castiel, on the other hand, sat worried in the opposite seat. His eyes hadn’t left (Y/N) for some time, and the lack of response from his partner whenever Dean would curse nearly at the top of his lungs troubled him further.

“Have you noticed that (Y/N) has not gotten much sleep recently?” Castiel asked faintly over the car radio.

Dean reached over and turned the dial so the Classic Rock faded into the background. “What was that, Cas?” He asked.

Castiel looked up at Dean for a brief moment. “Have you noticed that (Y/N) hasn’t gotten much sleep recently?” He repeated.

Dean nodded. “I’ve started to notice that, yeah.”

He glanced over at his brother to see that his gaze was straight ahead, earbuds in. Dean sighed, slapped him on the shoulder, then returned his hand to the wheel. Sam flinched and glared at Dean as he removed a bud from his left ear.

“Dude, what?” He asked, offense obvious in his tone.

“Have you noticed (Y/N)’s been losing sleep a lot?”

Sam furrowed his brows and glanced in the backseat at Castiel and (Y/N). “You know, now that you mention it, I have.”

Castiel hummed lightly, eyes still attached to (Y/N). The confirmation from his friends gave him some comfort. “I’m beginning to worry about him,” he admitted. “He’s awoken from numerous nightmares as of late.”

“That’s normal for hunters, Cas,” Sam said.

“Not for (Y/N). He has never had this many before.”

“Have you tried talking to him about it?”

“I have, but he never wants to tell me about them. He only ever tells me they’re hunting dreams, but…”

“You think he’s lying?”

Castiel’s silence answered for him.

“Look, Cas,” Dean began. “Nightmares, to hunters, are a bit of a touchy subject. We see a lot of things in the field and our everyday lives, and (Y/N)’s been through a lot. Maybe (Y/N) doesn’t want to worry you. I think he’ll come around eventually.”

“You believe so?”

Dean shrugged. “I don’t know. Probably.”

Sam rolled his eyes and scoffed as he put his earbuds back inside. Dean shot him a look.

“What?” Dean asked.

Sam shook his head. “Nothing.”

Dean grumbled under his breath before he peered in the rearview mirror. “Look, (Y/N) loves you, Cas, more than anything - trust me, he’s told me more times than I can count. If there’s anyone he would go to about this problem, it would be you. Just give him time.”

Time.

Castiel was a patient man under normal circumstances, but when it came to his partner, he found that his patience wore thin quite easily if he was in distress. Castiel never liked to see (Y/N) unhappy, and it made his heart ache when he felt he couldn’t do anything to help. How he wished he could take the pain away. How he wished he knew where to start.

(Y/N) let out a soft whimper, brows furrowed tightly, and Castiel cast him a saddened expression. He reached over and softly pulled him closer so that his head rested against Castiel’s chest. While he knew Dean was right, one thing’s for certain;

Castiel hated waiting.

*~*

“We’re on Easy Street,

And it feels so sweet.

‘Cause the world is but a treat

When you’re on Easy Street.”

(Y/N) groaned and leaned his head back against the wall as the song repeated for, what seemed like the hundredth time. A faint laugh could be heard from across the room, but the darkness that surrounded him left him completely blind. He knew it was Lucifer, though. He could tell.

“Come on, cheer up!” Lucifer said. “It’s a catchy tune!”

It was the first time in a while that (Y/N) didn’t feel terrified while he dreamt. In Lucifer’s unorthodox method of torture, he had rather grown quite annoyed. He knew it was Lucifer’s way of getting under his skin, and he was doing a fantastic job at it. It wasn’t long before the short song came to an end, then repeated. Again. (Y/N) let out a frustrated shout and buried his face in his hands.

Suddenly, the lights flickered on and revealed the gray, dull, concrete room that they were in. (Y/N) clenched his eyes shut before he removed his hands from his face to look over at Lucifer, who paced around the room rhythmically as he snapped his fingers to the beat of the song. The music mixed with the bright lights and Lucifer’s arrogant face caused the bottom of (Y/N)’s eye to twitch. When Lucifer saw the look on his face, he snickered.

“Aw, is (Y/N) getting upset?” Lucifer teased, bottom lip pushed out in a mock pout.

“I will castrate you.” (Y/N) deadpanned.

Lucifer hissed. “You know, I don’t think you can do that.”

“I’ll find a way.”

Lucifer let out a loud, boisterous laugh that reverberated off the walls. (Y/N) shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. Once the laughter died down, Lucifer stared at him intently, uncomfortably so. He lifted a hand and snapped his fingers. The music stopped. Then, it was silent. They stared at one another. Neither broke eye contact. Lucifer tilted his head to the side, and (Y/N) was partially convinced it was Castiel in that body, but he knew better.

“This isn’t working,” he sighed.

Yep, still Lucifer.

“I say you cut your losses.” (Y/N) grumbled.

“I’ll take that into consideration.”

Lucifer tapped his chin and he began to study the stone walls around them. (Y/N) furrowed his brows. There wasn’t much to study. They were just walls. Concrete walls that looked new, as if they had been constructed mere hours propr, and expertly as well. A single light fixture was placed in the center of the ceiling with a bulb bright enough to attract moths from miles away. The room was rather uncreative. Unoriginal. (Y/N) needed to start constructing better landscapes for his dreams.

“I got it!” Lucifer’s voice broke through the silence.

With the snap of his fingers, the room vanished and was replaced by a darker, dimmer setting. A small, abandoned warehouse that appeared as if it should have been demolished decades prior. Broken glass and metal beams littered the filthy floor. The only source of light came from the moonbeams that shined through the shattered windows. He took a moment to stand from his spot as his eyes scanned his surroundings. Lucifer had, again, vanished. He didn’t hold his breath, though, for he knew he wouldn’t be gone long.

“You know me so well,” a voice came from behind.

(Y/N) whipped around and came face-to-face with Lucifer. The real Lucifer. Not the one who hid behind Castiel’s face. With Castiel’s appearance gone, (Y/N) didn’t feel as much hesitation as he had before. All he felt was irritation. Annoyance. His jaw clenched, fists balled up at his sides. Lucifer smirked as he reached behind him and pulled a long blade out. He walked over and held the hilt out to him. (Y/N) took the blade and examined it intently.

“An Archangel Blade?” He questioned.

Lucifer shrugged nonchalantly. “I figured I’d tortured you long enough. You might as well get your revenge.”

(Y/N) narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “You want me to kill you.”

“It’s not gonna kill me. That would be stupid of me to give you something that would get rid of me, don’t you think?”

“Then I’m not interested.”

“Aw, why not? You know you want to.”

“Nope.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Not even a little cut?”

“No! Now fuck off,” (Y/N) waved him off as he turned on his heel and walked away.

Lucifer’s jaw dropped in shock. He was quick to follow. “So, what? You’re just going to throw away your one opportunity to get revenge even when I serve it to you on a silver platter!?”

Lucifer reached out and grabbed (Y/N)’s shoulder. It was almost instinctual, the way (Y/N) tightened his hold on the hilt, the way he turned at a speed no human should have to face him, the way he grasped Lucifer’s shoulder with an iron grip, and the way the Archangel Blade seamlessly plunged into his stomach was almost a surreal experience. Then, there was silence. Nothing moved, nothing blinked, nothing breathed. It was as if he were part of a photograph or a television show that had been left on pause. Slowly, (Y/N) closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and let it out.

Play.

“This is why you should never let your guard down.” (Y/N) said, eased the blade out of Lucifer’s (?) stomach, and took a step back.

That was when he saw them. The eyes. His heart stopped. Baby blues. Deep blues. The ocean. Wandering sea. Hurt. Sorrow. Betrayal. Death. The sea is dying. No one can stop it.

Castiel.

Castiel gripped the wound in his gut as he stumbled back. In an instant, his eyes rolled into the back of his head and he collapsed. Under his back, a deep, black imprint of angel wings got singed into the concrete. (Y/N) stared at the scene before him, mouth agape, eyes wide, heart still frozen in time. The blade dropped to the ground as if it wanted to part from his shaky hand.

“Cas?” He barely registered his voice as he stumbled down onto his knees beside his body.

He could feel the tears flow down his cheeks and he watched them methodically drop onto his trenchcoat. The sobs built up inside, but were unable to escape, caught in the back of his throat. He used one hand to caress Castiel’s cold, rough cheek. Just as the cries rattled in his chest, a smirk spread across Castiel’s chapped lips and his gaze darted toward (Y/N).

“What happened to not letting your guard down?” Lucifer mused.

(Y/N) let out a loud shout that echoed in the empty building. He fell back and began to crawl away. Lucifer cackled maniacally and stood. The wound in his chest began to close as he stepped closer.

“I don’t know why I never thought of that before! To make you take down the one thing, the one person that means the most to you. But, now that I’ve got you right where I want you, we’re going to have so…much…fun…”

*~*

“Agent Bermudez.”

…

“Agent Bermudez?”

…

“Agent!”

(Y/N) jumped slightly as he was pulled out of his trance. The cup, that held scalding hot coffee, in his hand jostled, but thankfully the contents remained in the glass. His eyes shot over to the sound of the voice. Dean and Sam stared at him expectedly. It took him a moment to realize that they had been talking to him.

“Uh, um, yes D-Agent?” He corrected himself.

Sam and Dean shared a look before their gaze returned to him. Sam cleared his throat.

“Did you have any more questions for Mrs. Calloway about her husband?” He asked.

It was then that he realized the middle-aged widow had been sat there the whole time. They were in her living room. In her house. The gears creaked in his brain as he attempted to figure out what had happened. When he caught on, he sat up quickly and placed the cup on a coaster that sat on the coffee table between the four of them.

We’re on a case, (Y/N). Get your shit together.

“Um, no, no I don’t.”

The brothers nodded before they turned back to Mrs. Calloway. They stood from the couch, and (Y/N) clumsily followed.

“Thank you so much for taking the time to talk to us, Mrs. Calloway. You’ve been very helpful,” Sam said with a small, sympathetic smile as he reached into his breast pocket and pulled out one of his faux business cards. “Give me a call if you can think of anything else.”

Mrs. Calloway took the card with a smile that mirrored Sam’s. “Thank you, agents. I appreciate you taking this so seriously. David would be grateful. Don’t burn yourself out over it, though. I know how much of a toll this job takes on you.” As she spoke, her eyes were trained on (Y/N).

(Y/N) flashed a small, albeit embarrassed, grin and gave a brief wave. Sam and Dean turned to leave as (Y/N) trailed behind. They let themselves out through the front door and back into the promotional poster for suburban America. Compared to the white and blue colonials with SUVs and Minivans parked in each driveway, the Impala stood out as a historic relic. Once they closed the door, the brothers looked over at (Y/N), each of them sporting their own look with Dean’s of slight annoyance and Sam’s of concern.

“What the Hell was that?” Dean asked, exasperated.

(Y/N) shook his head. “I don’t know. I just zoned out.”

“Yeah, we can tell,” Sam said. “What’s been going on recently?”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” (Y/N) said, although he wasn’t too convinced himself.

“No, you’re not fine!” Dean said. “Look, Cas told us about the nightmares. I get how they are, but these seem to be getting to you. Bad.”

“I said ‘I’m fine’.”

“You’re obviously not, and until you are, I think it would be best if you sat this one out.”

“Dean’s right,” Sam agreed. “He and I can do this one on our own. We’ve done it before. You need to get better.”

“You’re benching me?” (Y/N) growled.

“Yes.” Dean nodded sternly. “Until you’re better, that would be for the best.”

(Y/N) opened his mouth to rebuttal, but knew it would be futile. He clenched his jaw and stormed over to the Impala. He opened the back passenger door, sat inside with a huff, and slammed the door shut. Sam sighed and ran his fingers through his hair stressfully while Dean shook his head.

“He’s getting bad,” Dean mumbled.

“Yeah, I’ve never seen him like that before. He needs some rest.” Sam said.

“Right, we don’t need him getting himself killed.”

“Cas wouldn’t like that very much.”

“No, he wouldn’t.”

“We still need to interview the employees at the bookstore. You can drop me off there and take (Y/N) back to the motel.”

“No, I’ll go to the bookstore, you drive him to the motel.”

“Why me?”

“Because he’s more likely to talk to you about it. You might even get him to talk to Cas about it.”

Sam gave a small nod. “For once, I agree with you. You suck at empathy.”

“Oh, bite me,” Dean grumbled. “Just get in the damn car.”

*~*

The bookstore sat three miles from the motel. Once they dropped Dean off, (Y/N) moved to the passenger’s seat - much to his dismay - and Sam shifted to the driver’s. At first, the two were silent while Van Halen hummed calmly over the speakers. (Y/N)’s arms rested at his side, head hung down, eyes half-lidded. Sam glanced over at him now and again as he drove through the middle of the small downtown. It was from the occasional peak that Sam truly saw how exhausted he was. The skin under his eyes was dark and heavy, eyes bloodshot. His body slouched, and it appeared as if he could fall asleep in an instant.

“Cas is worried about you, you know.” Sam broke the silence.

“Why?” (Y/N) furrowed his brows.

“Because of these nightmares you’ve been having. Hell, Dean and I are just as worried as he is.”

“I’m fine.”

“See, you say that, but I think the only person you’re trying to convince is yourself.”

(Y/N) looked down at his lap and began to fiddle with his hands.

“We care about you,” Sam continued. “And we hate seeing you like this.”

Sam made a right turn into the motel lot and parked in the vacant spot in front of their door.

“How did you deal with it?” (Y/N) whispered.

Sam looked over at him. “Deal with what?”

“Lucifer.”

Sam hesitated. “Is that what your nightmares have been about?”

(Y/N) could only nod.

“How long has this been going on?”

“Since a couple of months after we got Cas back. No matter how hard I try, he won’t leave me alone. It’s like he’s really there.” (Y/N)’s voice became shaky and tears streamed down his face.

Sam reached over, placed a gentle hand on (Y/N)’s shoulder, and gave it a light squeeze. “I’m sorry. I’ve been there before. It’s horrible…you need to tell Cas.”

“I can’t. I don’t want him to worry.”

“He’s already worried, (Y/N), and you’re getting worse by the day. You need to talk to him.”

“I don’t want him to blame himself.”

“Why would he blame himself?”

“Because Lucifer is always in Cas’ body.”

Sam raised his brows and sighed. When Lucifer used Castiel’s vessel as his own, it was tough on all of them, but he knew it was especially difficult on (Y/N). For Sam, it was difficult to see his friend a prisoner in his own body, he couldn’t imagine how hard it must’ve been for (Y/N). To see the face of your lover worn as a mask by an Archangel that tormented the people that you loved? ‘Hard’ must’ve been too light of a word.

“Listen, you know Cas would never do whatever Lucifer is doing to you.”

(Y/N) sniffled and nodded. “I know, I know. It’s just that it keeps reminding me of when I didn’t have Cas…and Lucifer was horrible when he took over his vessel and I just hated seeing him like that. I wanna forget that it even happened.”

“I know,” Sam rubbed his shoulder comfortingly. “But I think Cas’ll understand.”

“You think so?”

“I think so.” Sam smiled over at him.

(Y/N) reached up and wiped the tears from his cheeks.

“Tell you what,” Sam said. “Why don’t you go in and lay down? I’ll give Cas a call and have him come over.”

“Don’t tell him.”

“I won’t, but you need to. If you don’t, then I will.”

(Y/N) looked over at Sam before he gave a nod. Sam reached into his pocket and pulled out the spare room key, which (Y/N) graciously took.

“Get some sleep, okay?” Sam spoke softly.

“I will. Goodnight, Sam,” (Y/N) mumbled, got out of the car, walked to the door, and entered the room.

*~*

Please, make it stop.

The warehouse was the same as in his previous dream. Still old, still dilapidated. The only difference was the large array of angel wings burnt meticulously into the floor. There was no blood, no gore, no bodies strewn about to remind him of what he did. He didn’t need the extra detail, Lucifer knew that. The wings were more than enough.

No more, please.

“And, again!” Lucifer exclaimed.

No!

(Y/N) gripped the angel blade tight in his hand, despite his mental protests. Castiel appeared in front of him, blue eyes pleading. He wasted no time as he drove the angel blade into his chest. Onto the floor, he fell like a ragdoll and a new etching of wings joined the bunch. He breathed.

It was a vicious cycle.

“Again!”

Command. Kill. Breathe.

“Again!”

Command. Kill. Breathe.

“Again!”

Command. Kill. Breathe.

“Again!”

Command.

Kill.

Breathe.

He collapsed onto his knees. The angel blade slipped from his grasp and skidded across the floor. His eyes were so wide he was half certain they would burst from the sockets, lips parted to allow the heavy breaths of air to flow. Lucifer’s deep chuckle sounded in his ears as he stepped closer and knelt in front of him. Lucifer lifted his chin so their eyes connected.

“Good,” he smirked. “You’ve come a long way, my dear hunter.”

Fuck you.

“Thank you, Lucifer,” (Y/N)’s voice sounded fake and robotic.

Lucifer hummed and pursed his lips. “I still hear a little defiance in that head of yours. Perhaps we should keep going.”

No! Please!

“Of course, Lucifer.”

(Y/N) stood on shaky legs and made his way to the discarded weapon.

No, please, don’t do this.

“You are such a good listener, (Y/N).” Lucifer praised.

Don’t listen to him! Stop!

(Y/N) picked up the blade and held it with a death grip.

Put that down! You don’t have to do this!

He turned so he faced Lucifer, back straight, head held high.

Command.

No!

Kill.

Please!

Breathe.

I’ll do anything!

Lucifer smirked.

“Again!”

*~*

“No!” (Y/N) let out a loud, guttural scream as he shot up from his spot on the bed.

His eyes were red from the tears that stained his cheeks, and his chest moved up and down with the efforts of his breathing. When he felt a hand on his shoulder, he jerked away violently and scrambled off the bed, his legs weak and barely able to hold his weight.

“No, please,” (Y/N) leaned against the wall to keep himself upright. He had his palms pressed against his ears, eyes shut tight.

“(Y/N)? (Y/N), it’s me.” Castiel gently edged himself off the bed and walked over to him.

As Castiel placed his hands on (Y/N)’s shoulder, he felt his body tense.

“You’re not real. You’re not real. You’re not real.” (Y/N) repeated continuously.

Carefully, Castiel removed (Y/N)’s hands from his ears, despite the weak protests. He could feel the way his heart raced, the way his hands shook, and it hurt to see.

“Bumblebee, please,” Castiel’s voice was deep, soft, soothing. “It’s me. It’s Castiel.”

Bumblebee.

(Y/N)’s eyes shot open as he turned his head - eyes, look at the eyes. Elegant waves of blue. Sapphires. Full of worry. Full of life. Life. He was alive. Castiel was alive.

“Cas?” His voice came out hoarse.

“Yes, it’s me. You’re safe.”

Hesitantly, (Y/N) cupped his cheek. His thumb brushed against the stubble that decorated his jawline. The longer he stared into his eyes, the more he felt peace, comfort, a sense of love and longing, home. He brought Castiel close to him and embraced him tight enough that it was sure to hurt if he were human. The grip he had on him was tense as if he were convinced Castiel would vanish at any moment. Castiel returned the affection but, instead of wrapping his arms around him, he placed an arm around his back and another under his knees. He picked him up, carried him the short distance over to the bed, and laid him down. He lay next to him, their arms never retreating.

“(Y/N), please,” Castiel’s breath was warm against his ear. “I know that it wasn’t a hunting dream. Please, talk to me.”

(Y/N) was silent as he reveled in the fact that he was able to hold Castiel as close to him as he was. Alive. He took a moment to think back to the conversation he had with Sam - He’s already worried…You need to talk to him. Based on Castiel’s tone of voice, and the words he used, he knew Sam was right. He had to tell him.

“They’re about you,” (Y/N) whispered just loud enough for Castiel to hear.

At those words, Castiel pulled back ever so slightly, but never took his hands off him. He studied (Y/N)’s face and noticed the way he refused to look at him. His brows knit together in confusion and concern. He reached a hand up to caress his cheek.

“What happens in these dreams, (Y/N)?” He asked softly.

(Y/N) was hesitant to respond, a part of him terrified of the guilt Castiel could potentially feel, another scared at the mere idea of mentioning Lucifer’s name aloud. What if he wasn’t truly gone? What if he heard him? Would he find him? Would he kill him? Would the nightmares he had dealt with for the past several months come true? He knew he had to reveal the source of the dreams, though. Not only for his sake but for Castiel’s as well.

“It’s never really you in the dreams. It’s always Lucifer inside your vessel. He started by teasing me, mocking me, and then…he started to torture me. It was stupid shit at first, stuff that didn’t really hurt me. Then he brought you into the picture.” (Y/N)’s voice began to shake as tears appeared in the corner of his eyes, a result of recalling the events of his nightmares and exhaustion. “He made me kill you, Cas.”

Castiel was quick to pull him back into his arms. He brought their bodies so close together that it was as if they were one. At the warmth he felt wrapped around his body, (Y/N) finally let himself cry. Hard.

“And I try to stop him,” (Y/N) sobbed. “I try so hard, but nothing I do seems to work, and I have to kill you over and over and over again and he won’t let me go. I know he’s not there, but he feels so real.”

Castiel shushed him gently as his hand rubbed his back soothingly. They simply held each other as (Y/N) let out all the sadness, pain, and frustration he had kept in for the longest time. With each cry, with each shake of his body, Castiel felt himself break. The man he loved, the man who stole his heart, sat shattered in his arms, and he felt responsible.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered into his ear between sobs.

(Y/N) shook his head. “It’s not your fault, I knew you would do that.” His voice was broken and shaky.

“I let Lucifer in.”

“But you couldn’t control his actions. Lucifer is to blame, not you. I could never blame you.”

“But if I would’ve-”

“Lucifer would have found a way, we both know this.”

By then, his cries had mellowed out to mere sniffles and hiccups with the occasional stray tear. They spent the next several minutes holding one another, silent. The room started to get dark as the sun set, and (Y/N) couldn’t help but wonder where the brothers were. How they were doing on the hunt. He hoped his debilitating exhaustion hadn’t cost them any valuable time or extra hands they may have needed. It wasn’t long before Castiel spoke once more.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked.

“I didn’t want you to blame yourself. I knew you would. There isn’t anything you can do about it anyway. I thought I could get it under control.”

Castiel paused before he pulled back. “Maybe I can. May I try something?”

(Y/N) hesitated before he shook his head. “I don’t want to go back to sleep, Cas,” he said, voice laced with uncertainty.

“Trust me, Bumblebee, please? I believe I know how I can help.”

(Y/N) sighed. Despite everything he told himself, he was exhausted. He had been for the past several weeks, and the strength he previously used to keep himself awake had all but faded. He didn’t want to have another nightmare, but if Castiel could help him, he had to give him a chance. (Y/N) gave Castiel a quick peck on the lips.

“I trust you.”

Castiel smiled warmly. He nuzzled his nose against (Y/N)’s and grabbed the comforter. He draped it over their bodies. He shifted so their legs were tangled together, wrapped his arms around (Y/N)’s waist, and rested his forehead against his. He began to rub his back in small, slow circles, and (Y/N) could feel his body instantly relax.

“Get some sleep, Bumblebee. I promise I’ll keep you safe. I love you.” Castiel whispered, and his words alone sounded like a lullaby.

“I love you, too, Cas. So much.” (Y/N) mumbled back.

With the warmth of Castiel’s embrace, (Y/N) was quick to drift off once more with a new hope of content slumber.

*~*

Nothing. That was the best word he could use to describe where he was. It wasn’t dark, nor was it light. It wasn’t a basic abandoned warehouse, nor was it a location embedded in his memory. It was simply and utterly nothing. Although the implication of ‘nothing’ meant the absence of ‘something’. The question was: what was missing?

“Bumblebee?”

(Y/N)’s head perked up at the nickname. He began to look around but found no source. There was still nothing.

“I’m here, (Y/N).”

As he turned around, he was blinded by a bright light. He squinted and shielded his eyes. From the light, a heat radiated off of it and surrounded him like a blanket. He felt the urge to go to it as if a rope had wrapped itself around his waist and begun to pull. When he walked, he floated. His legs didn’t move. It was unknown what waited beyond the light, but whatever it was made him feel safe, loved, and wanted. Soon, the light engulfed him, and he was blinded once more.

When his vision was restored, he was welcomed to a sight he had never witnessed before. Yellow, sandy beaches surrounded by a deep blue ocean. The sun seemed to sit where it barely kissed the distant waves, giving the sky an orangish pink tone. In front of him sat a pier, one that he was no stranger to, yet he had only seen in movies and television shows. ‘Pacific Park’ was inscribed into the archway of the entrance. Behind it sat various theme park rides, all small in size, but worth the experience.

“(Y/N)?”

(Y/N) turned to his right to see Castiel, a small smile on his lips. He was uncertain at first, but once he saw the brilliance in his eyes, he relaxed and mirrored his smile.

“Cas,” he breathed, reached over, and took his hand. “Is this the Santa Monica Pier?”

Castiel looked up at the archway and nodded. “I’ve been here once during my exploration of Earth, and you mentioned that you had never been here before.”

(Y/N) shook his head and pursed his lips. “I think I’ve only been to California a handful of times, most of which were up North near Red Bluff.” He said. “But why are we here?”

Castiel gave his hand a gentle squeeze and began to lead him down the pier. Unlike the true Santa Monica beaches, these were barren. Not a single soul resided on the pier or beach besides (Y/N) and Castiel. It would have been an eerie experience had it not been for the sound of the roaring sea.

“Your nightmares focused on memories, or memories of how Lucifer was, correct?”

“Right?”

“Well, I figured the best way to rid you of those memories is to create new ones while you dream.”

(Y/N) couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his lips. “Like a date?”

“Yes. A date.”

“So, what? You’re going to take me on a date every time I dream now?”

“If that’s what it takes to stop the nightmares and allow you to get some sleep then we will have dates every night while you dream for the rest of your life.”

(Y/N) stopped in his tracks and slowly pulled back on Castiel’s hand. Castiel looked back at him and tilted his head ever so slightly. (Y/N) grabbed Castiel’s other hand, brought both of them up to his lips, and kissed his knuckles.

“Castiel, you are the best boyfriend that anyone could ever ask for. I don’t deserve you.” He said.

“No, Bumblebee. You deserve the world. I would love to give it to you.”

(Y/N) reached up and cupped Castiel’s cheek. “I have my world right here.”

He pressed his forehead against Castiel’s. Their noses brushed against one another, then they kissed. It was short and sweet, but it held all their love and passion behind it. When they parted, they stared deeply at each other.

“I love you, Cas.”

“I love you, too, (Y/N).”

(Y/N) beamed and dropped one of Castiel’s hands. He began to drag him towards the theme park rides.

“Now, come on! I’ve always wanted to ride these!”

Castiel followed at an even pace behind him, and he couldn’t help but feel the guilt and pain that had built up inside of him wash away. To see his partner shine with happiness was an experience he would not soon forget. He made it his mission, from then on out, to guarantee that every dream (Y/N) had would be just as wonderful, if not better, than the last. For, as long as they were together, Castiel pledged that nightmares would be a thing of the past, never to plague the mind of his beloved until the end of his days.

62 notes · View notes