#Ill listen to all your stories even though you wont listen to mine

[bruhstation]

you never change, do you

[slashingdisneypasta]

Human!Freddy Krueger x Fem!Reader || Oneshot

Title: What The Fuck Now, Freddy!?

Notes:

This is not inherently romantic, at all. Or sexual. Just... Freddy being a bastard, and you are caught in the crosshairs- and are forever linked with him because of it.

I've been listening to Lizzie, a lot lately- and this is inspired by 'What The Fuck Now, Lizzie!?'

Also- I'm thinking this will have a part 2. Due to the ending not being quite enough. Maybe a part for the court proceedings!

Plot: Many will know the story of that terrible day Krueger essentially snapped- killing his wife, Loretta Krueger. She saw the basement, they say, and he didn't like that. Their daughter saw the whole thing and suffered a traumatic response to seeing the sight of her mother, strangled to death, by her father- and forgot the whole thing.

But if she were to remember something, one day.

She may remember something no one knows about that day, aside from Freddy himself.

She may remember, that someone else was there.

She may remember you.

//

Alternatively- you're being blackmailed by Freddy who found out you, another supposedly Plain Jane in Loretta's 'mothers club', is cheating on your husband and calls you up to help deal with the mess he made. Because who else did he have?

Warnings: Okay lemme see, its basically a potluck of triggers. Hm. Murder, swearing, cheating (You, on your husband. Not with Freddy), getting rid of a body, a child gets traumatised (Obviously, Kathy/Maggie), Freddy himself, mention of the basement and all that entails, reader with a very questionable moral compass. Look, I think if you can watch Freddy's Dead, you're good here.

I'm just heading out the door, to go grocery shopping - or, at least, that's the story I tell my husband. When really I don't do the grocery shop until the day after tomorrow. He never notices... - when the phone rings. By very nearly tripping over my feet in my endeavour to catch it before the ringing stops, I manage pick up the phone with very little injury besides an achy, slightly twisted ankle. "Hi! Hi, sorry, I'm here. Hello?"

Pouting, I sit down at the kitchen table; Rubbing my poor ankle to sooth the pain, which would soon diminish anyway. Still- I'm sorry, ankle. I'll try to chill.

When the voice on the other end reveals who it is who's called the house, I lose all need to be pleasant. Damn. I really need to memorise this goddamn number... so I can not answer it. "Whatcha wearin'?"

"Thank god Harrison didn't answer this, you fuck." I deeply roll my eyes. Thank god Har's out. No, this is not my mister, not the man I was going to meet just now- but its bad, enough. In an entirely different way. Its stupid, blackmailing, son of a... hundred maniacs. "What do you want?"

"What a way to answer the phone, Y/N. Gee, seems like every time I we talk, I'm learning how you really aren't in the right place, are you? Cheating on your poor husband, swearing... These aren't really signs of the perfect suburban house wife, is it?" Gritting my teeth, I keep from lashing out. I've learned, if you stay real quiet, Freddy wont have anything to pull from and will get bored quick. "Why so silent, hm?"

"... " Oh, fuck me. I cant help it. "Wondering where you get off judging me on being 'suburban', actually."

"Anywhere I like, thanks."

Oh... oh. Gross?

He doesn't see the disgust tearing my face into two perfect halves right now, but my silence must be enough as he laughs. The sound is directly into the phone, and harsh on my poor eardrums. Ugh... "Oh for gods sake... What are we? Fourteen years old?? Come on- why'd you call?"

"Uhhhh... " Quickly, midway through that drawn out 'um' sound, Freddy's voice transitions, and gets a whole lot darker. Something deep in his chest dislodging, to make it so. Perhaps, his heart. "Well... you might wanna come and see for yourself."

"Uh, I don't think so. I have somewhere to be right now- "

"Oh well you don't, anymore." And its clear what he isn't saying- or else I'll tell Harrison about Carter and set your life on fire. "Tell your boy toy you're takin' a reign check for the day. I think you'll last. In fact... after you come over here, you might be out of the game for a couple a hours at least- maybe days."

Hold on, hold on Freddy what the fuck- "What!?"

"... Believe it or not, I didn't actually mean for that one."

Moron.

~

Nevertheless, no matter how just... off setting, Freddy is, I had to when he asked. I had to jump when he said so.

Because if not, then he would tear my life apart.

So here I am, about to knock on that big red door he lives behind, wondering what I'm walking into. Where's Loretta? Where's Kathy? How long will the visit be? I told Carter I'd be an hour or two late- any longer and I wont see him at all today. Which would absolutely suck.

Just after my knuckles come down on the wood the first time, a hand comes down on my shoulder and I immediately jump out of my skin... then slowly look around.

There's Freddy, a cheeky grin on his face. It does nothing to set my nerves at ease. "Ugh... Why are you out here?"

"We're going to the backyard. Lets go." Taking me by the shoulders, he marches me around the side of the house, instead of through it for some reason, and into the familiar backyard. I've been here numerous times, as Loretta likes to hold our club meetings here - Barbecue's, tea's... that sort of thing. Just to let the kids play together and so the adults can enjoy some adult conversation. Its a nice yard... but depending on what her horrid husband is about to show me, it may not be considered as such anymore... - , but I'm now starting to develop a sick feeling in my stomach.

Honestly- I don't know much about Freddy at all. Yes, I went to school with him, but that doesn't mean much when he was a freaky loner kid the whole time. I remember he killed the class hamster once- that's about the only splash he ever made in the news pool; But it definitely stuck.

Yes, Loretta cleaned up his image a fair bit since getting married, but now he's blackmailing me, and as far as I know I'm now alone with him.

Suspicious of him suddenly, I slip out of his grip with a dirty look flashed his way. Don't touch me.

He just rolls his eyes, leading me around some hedges.

And then everything stops.

Him, me, the air; The air around me, the breeze, the breath in my throat.

There lays Loretta, on the ground. If I was really really naïve, I could imagine she were sleeping... or passed out, at least, due to the way she's sprawled out. No one would lay down like that willingly.

But... her eyes are open.

For a moment I'm tempted to kneel down; Take a closer look. Find out how, myself. Is she bleeding anywhere that I cant see now? Are her lips turning blue? If I moved some short red hair out of the way- would their be marks on her neck yet?

But then I come to my senses...

And freak. The fuck. O u t.

"What, the fuck, did you do!?" I whip around, looking at Freddy now which entirely new eyes. I mean, before I sure wasn't fond- but now I'm filled with something new, looking at him. Something a lot worse, something that makes me want to run. Run, and hide, and stay there.

And all these, even though he hasn't really changed. He still wears a mischievous smirk, stony blue eyes eating up my reactions... like always. But this time its just so so much worse. "Made some dead weight- now you're gonna help me get rid of it. So!" Finally, though its been only a matter of seconds, he turns his gaze off of me and I'm glad. That gaze is far too heavy. "Ideas?"

Only for a moment am I lost for words, struggling to push anything out. "I... I'm sorry??"

His gaze returns to mine, but this time my eyes are hard as his are dark. "Help. Me. Get rid of her. Fucking. Body. Or do you want your dirty laundry aired for the whole community to hear?"

Before I can help myself, I let out a sharp laugh, only succeeding in making Freddy's scowl deeper. "Freddy- this secret's a lot bigger, then mine. Sure, I might get divorced- but you're going to prison!" Does he get that? He's g o i n g to j a i l. Crossing my arms, I try to avoid looking at my ex-friend's body. I cant. "I'm sure as hell not gonna be in there with you, for being an accomplice."

I really cant look at her... I can only focus on Freddy. And that takes a lot of energy- its taking everything in me, in fact. Everything I have. But I have to. If its him or her, there's no choice.

But... then a creepy smile spreads across his face- a vast polarity to the frustrated glower of before. It makes my blood run cold.

"Ohhhh..." He looks almost ferocious, even in his composed state. Like a monster. Like any moment a fanged, inhuman creature is going to burst out of him and I'm going to wake up, and this will have been a nightmare. A horrible nightmare. The kind where that creature haunts me for a long time, after its over. After this over.

He's going to haunt me.

"You must think this is my first time... " My heart turns to ice, mouth hanging a little open... what the fuck have I found myself a part of!? Suddenly all the children's disappearances on the news lately come to the forefront of my brain... "Sweetheart, give a man his dues. I'm a hard working kinda guy... " I watch his gaze flicker to a door - the back door? No... The basement door, - and when a filthy smirk pulls at his mouth, my heart flies up into my throat. God, it makes me feel sick. I want to be violently ill. "My first was my adoptive Dad... pretty sick, huh?"

The fact that he didn't say anything about the basement, makes my imagination go wild. I swallow it down, though.

I just need to get out of here, and never think about this again.

And to do that I need to help Freddy get rid of this goddamn body- and... probably... testify at court... As the panic starts to finally rise up in my, right up to fill my throat, I immediately take in a deep breath and slowly let it out. "Okay... " No time to freak out. Now's the time for action.

Gaze flickering to Loretta again, I try to acclimatise to the sight. I think its a lost cause, though. "How did you get rid of him? Your Dad?"

"No, that's not gonna work. He was a drunk dead beat, and I just had to tell the police some guy's he owed money to came over to the house." Freddy grins happily at the memory, but then just as quickly, scowls at his poor deceased wife's body- that certainly cant fight back. I just tack this onto the long list of reasons I hate him. "Lore's such a goddamn goody goody- we cant do the same thing. You don't think I woulda thought of that??"

"Hey." I snap, hands braced on my hips as I flash a glare his way. "This is not the time to get defensive!"

"Whatever... "

Then- suddenly, something occurs to me. Confused, I look around; A deeply horrified feeling disturbing my stomach. "Hold on... Where's your daughter?" Seeing no sign of her anywhere, I definitely start to panic again- especially when I look to Freddy and just see a pert look in his eyes as he looks back at me, a smile that strikes something horrid inside me. My eyes narrow. "You sick fuck- where the fuck is she!??"

"Under the bed."

"What the fuck does that mean!?" I exclaim, frustrated and freaking out. He did not- he did not! Killing your spouse is one thing, but the kid?? Your own kid??

I don't wait around for him to be cryptic some more, and rush right into the house to look for her. Under the bed, under the bed, under the fucking bed...? Which fucking bed!? Forcing ferocity out of my voice, I carefully call out to Kathy. Hoping to god she answers. I try to sound normal. Maybe a little bit cheerful; Excited.

But my voice wobbles.

"Kathy?? Sweetheart, its Y/N! Are you hiding? I have something for you... " ?? You have something for her, Y/N?? God... now you have to figure out some kind of treat.

You know what? Whatever. We'll figure that out later.

Lets just hope we aren't searching for a corpse. I'd definitely be sick, seeing a child... the way Loretta is...

Shaking my head and clenching my fists, I try to focus on Kathy.

I check under the bed in the guest room because it comes into view first and she isn't there, then her bedroom and she isn't there either... and get a sick feeling as soon as I enter the last bedroom. Freddy's and Loretta's.

God, I've never been in here before but its like a museum peace now. A horrible one. Like if you would walk into the Titanic... or the Borden house.

"Kathy? You in here?" Flicking on the light I kneel down on the ground, and check under the bed.

And something immediately crashes over me, as the sight of her covering her eyes down there. It isn't exactly relief, because this whole situation is still phenomenally fucked up for her, but I am selfishly glad to not have to see her body... crumpled, just like her mother.

"Hey sweetheart," My voice quivers slightly now, but I quickly swallow. No. No. Now, you must be strong Y/N. "Its just me. Your Daddy was looking for you, and couldn't find you! It got him worried!"

"I... I don't wanna see Daddy. He hurt Mommy." Kathy doesn't remove her hands from her face, and stays firmly by the wall- too far away for anyone to grab. My heart sinks.

Slowly straightening up again, I try to take that piece of information in. Turning to the doorway, I see Freddy there. he must have followed me. I didn't even notice. Slowly, and quietly ferociously, I say; "She saw?!"

He has the good sense to look embarrassed, even if it is just to make fun of me. "It was spur of the moment... " He shrugs. "I didn't have time to get a babysitter!"

What a fucking excuse. For gods sake.

I'm definitely dealing with a psycho- if that was even a question before now.

Swiftly, I look down under the bed again, because I'm afraid that if I continue to engage with him- I'll scream, and I'll lose my breath, and I'll scare Kathy even more. She's at the forefront of my mind; That's all I can think about.

But what to do with her after I get her out from under this bed, I don't know. I cant give her back to her father... but I cant hand her over to the police either because that would involve telling them about Loretta, and... Freddy will definitely kill me, for that.

This is a nightmare of a situation.

I'm just opening my mouth to say something - what, I don't know yet, - when she speaks, instead. "Is he there?"

"... Yes." I wont lie to her; That would be treating her with not nearly as much respect as she deserves.

When she takes a deep breath and rubs her eyes, as if just trying to keep herself together, my heart clenches. God... and to think I might not have picks up Freddy's call today. I would have been leaving her with this. For the first time today, I'm morbidly glad I came.

She speaks in that loud, hissy way that kids think is a whisper. "Can he... can you please make him go away?"

Immediately I straighten back up and look to Freddy again, my eyebrows raised halfway up my forehead. Like well? "Get out."

"I don't think you're in a position to make demands here, bi- "

"Do you want Kathy to live down there now!??" I snap, trying not to be scared. Not really feeling scared, actually. Just happy to have a reason to tell him to get the hell away from me.

A deep frown creases his mouth, deeply unhappy about the situation, but steps back. I only hear him step out of the way of the door, but its good enough. Quickly, I get up and close the door - fighting with myself not to slam it, - and lock it.

Then I return to the floor, and see this time Kathy has uncovered her eyes. She looks so small, smaller then she actually is, and she looks like she's shaking. Little red bows and piggy tails in her hair are messy from crawling under the bed. "He's gone, sweetheart. And I locked the door."

She just nods, so I take the silence as a chance to offer my hand to her. "Take my hand, sweetie? Come on out from under the bed. Its cold down there, and no one wants you getting sick." I need to upkeep the family friend bit, I need to sound caring and collected. I need her to trust me.

Her big eyes, not Loretta's colour or Freddy's, look nervous as hell. And she shakes her head.

Taking a deep breath, and I conjure all the sincerity as I can. And mean it. My eyes soften and I try really hard, to resent myself as someone trustworthy- which is hard, seeing as I've never really been that. I mean, I'm cheating on my husband. I told Carter today the same lie I told Harrison when i knew I was going to be late. The only person I think who knows the truth behind all my lies is Freddy. That says something about a person, that the only person who knows them is a psychopath.

But I want to, I need to, be good for this little girl. And there's no time for me turn my life around so it has to start with this. How fucked is that?

"... I promise, I'll take care of you. He wont hurt you."

After a few whole minutes, in which I stay silent because yes she's a child, but she's still thinking, she crawls over and takes my hand, letting me lead her out. Crawling into my lap as I cross my legs under her, she buries her face in my shirt- hiding. "You promise?"

Taking a deep breath, because I've really done it now, I offer my pinky for her to see if she turned her head. I know Freddy's listening to all of this through the wall, but I try not to freak out. "Pinky swear?"

"Pinky swear." She peaks out from my shirt, and curls her little finger around mine. Okay... "Y/N... I'm scared."

"Yeah... Me too, sweetie."

What am I going to do?

[kitten-mafiagang]

Waiting You From Season to Season [Kitsune Atsumu x Reader]

(Reader's pov)

As a shrine maiden myself,i usually just stay from the shrine cleaning it everyday,watching the foxes pass by.Its been a family tradition,But who am i to complain? Adjusting my kimono and went out to brush the leaves of the blooming cherry blossoms,A familiar orange fox walks beside her and sits staring at the falling leaves of the cherry blossom.

"Oh.. its you again,do you want to go inside and have some tea with me?" i smiled.Even though the fox wont understand me,i would treat them like an equal human with love.

I set the broom at the tree and walked inside the shrine,i glanced at the fox who's patiently sitting."Hmm.. ill be back for a sec.." I went inside and grabbed left over onigiri's and some tea for myself.I walked back to the patient fox

"Sorry i took awhile,here.." i placed the treat at the ground and the fox slowly walked up to the treats and eat.

I took a sip of tea and stared at the sky. " Looks like winter is about to come.. its gonna take awhile to see the cherry blossoms once again.."

.

.

.

.

(Atsumu's pov)

Day and the day next i would visit the shrine caretaker and become their companion,I would always feel bad watching them talking to no one else but themselves. As usual i came to see them once again,but they were not out,the white snow was slowly falling from the sky,as the path through her shrine was slowly getting packed by snow.

I peeked through the small door as she was drinking as usual

"Oh..its you,come in its snowing outside" They called,their sweet smile plasting through their face.

Being her company everyday isnt boring at all,listening to their rants,thier stories,and the feeling of lonelyness

(Timeskip)

One day i decided to finally show them who am i,My tail happily swaying as i walk to the path back to their shrine.

As i knocked through the door,no one answered,I knocked again and again,i waited patiently.Worry got into me and decided to go inside.I saw them laying at their futon,face was beatroot red.. Theyre having a fever.I went to her small kitchen and boiled water,and grabbed a rag to clean them up.

"..Huh.." they called out

"Shh,just rest.."

" I gues.. my fever are turning worst.." They tried closing their eyes and stared at mines again

" Shh.. dont worry ill take care of you "

.

.

.

A snow storm went pass through the nights as i tried to put effort giving heat that (y/n) needs.It was hard trying to cook food,i have no idea how human cooking works,does she even now im a kitsune..?

As few more days passed,the snow started to melt as (y/n)'s fever went down they become more responsive.

"So youre that fox?"

"Yes"

"Why are you here"

"Keep you company"

"Youre just annoying me"

"Stop"

"Sorry"

As the spring went by,their pale skin was visible,but she still continue to clean the shrine,and i decided to help.Even though their fever dropped,she would often cough here and there,But i make sure she stills eat her proper meal,and take care of themselves.

"I can do it myself tsumu.." i held the spoon infront of her

"Just say ah lil cutie" i teased

"Shut up!"

Summer came,and the hot season didnt help (Y/n) at all I patiently cutted the melon and gave it to them,"Eat" I said as she replied "Alright alright"

As the gods above didnt become generous today,the water circulation through the shrine stopped working,And i would bring buckets of water everyday to keep her hydrated,Luckily theres a near river.

Finally the summer passed by as the Autumn went,Their condition become worst.

"*Coughs* *coughs* I-ill be fine.. i promise" they stared at me and smiled,I couldt hold to stare at them in this stare,their once pretty skin was pale,their blossom lips where dry,and their usual glowing eyes were dull and out of life.

I cant do anything else but to hold them and stare at the sky.

"Tsumu..,thanks for keeping me company.. this year" they smiled.

"Its.. no biggie"

"If i were to disapear one night,will you wait for me to come back?"

"I will.."

Its been years,seasons keeps cycling,And ill wait for you from season to season.

Ps.This isnt supposed to end but angst got me lmao

[inspriredlyuninspired]

The Stalker

Part 7

Modern!Ivar x Curvy!Reader, Able-bodied!Ivar x Dark!Ivar

Hey Guys!! i know its been a really long, i’ve been struggling a lot lately and i had the motivation to write! i hope you enjoy!

First peron POV (this s my first time doing first person POV in this series so let me know if you guys like it!)

The night with Ivar was so much fun, i can’t remeber the last time i had this much fun with someone. From pillow fights, jumping on the bed, ordering as much room service as we could. Ivar and i laid on the bed spread out with full bellies.

“i don’t want to eat anything every again” Ivar said taking a deep breath after.

“Hey, last time i checked you were the one who ordered it” I said back, just getting a grunt in response.

He slowly got out of bed and started walking towards the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Not thinking anything of it i just rolled over and started admiring the room and the extravagancey of it.

A few minutes later, Ivar emerged from the bathroom and motioned with his fingers to go over to him. Without a question i obliged, i don’t know how he had this effect on me.

i followed him into the bathroom and when i walked in a saw a drawn bath, with candles all over the place. This was the most romantic gesture anyone has done for me, it felt as though i could start crying. Too many emotions just ovewhelming me.  

“Oh Ivar” is all i could manage to say. The smile on his face brightened the candle lit bathroom. He walked towards me, putting his hands on my hips, gently lifting my shirt.

No one has ever seen me naked or even almost naked, well technically Ivar had but i did everything in my power not to think about that. I did not stop him from lifting my shirt over my head. He ran his hands ever so lightly down my sides to the top of my shorts.

He kneeled down, sliding them down my legs, peppering kisses to the top of my thighs on his way back up. Once standing again, he looked me up and down.

I moved my arms to cover myself, which he didn’t see immediately because he was taking off his own shirt and shorts leaving him in his breifs.

‘Wow’ is all i could think, he was lean, toned, and out of my league. The thoughts wouldn’t stop, thinking about how handsome he was, and then how i looked.

I was taken from my thoughts by feeling his strong hands gently pull my arms to my sides

“Never hide yourself from me, you’re the most perfect woman i have ever seen, you are all i have every wanted.” His voice was soft and calm.

His hands slowly reached behind me to unclip the hooks of my bra. i grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Ivar, no one has seen me like that before” i said matching his volume

“not even you” I managed to whisper

“i know little dove, if you want me to stop, i will and i will let you bathe alone.” he said. He didnt sound mad or annoyed, he sounded sincere.

“im just scared, that you will see eveyrthing, and wont like it.”i said, a slight saddness in my voice.  Because i had not told him to stop, he started to slowly unclasp my bra as he said

“In my eyes there is noting more beautiful than you, you are my light, you are my love, you are my everything. I love you Y/N, and i love your body” he began to slowly pull the straps down my arms, i immideatly moved my arms to cover myself. He did not stop me.

He peppered kisses from my neck, to my chest, down my stomach until he got to my navel. He looked up at me throuh his eyelashes, as if asking permission. I nodded and then closed my eyes, i did not want to see his reaction when he saw me. All of me.

I felt his hands leave my body and i kept my eyes closed, expecting the worse, but not too long afer i felt his arms wrap around me again. I opened my eyed to the most piercing blue eyes looking at me.

“you are so perfect” He whispered

By this time he had taken off his briefs, we both stood there completely open and exposed to each other.

He moved his hands to gently hold my jaw, unconsciously my hands left my chest, now completely exposing myself to him, to hold onto his arms.

He leaned down and pressed the sweetest kiss to my lips, it was as if his lips were made for mine, the way we fit together was so natural. I felt safe, i felt protected, and mostly i felt something i never thought i would. Loved.

We bathed together, just admiring each others presence, me leaning back against his chest as he cupped the warm water and poured it over my shoulder. a sweet gesture that meant more to me then i think he thought.

There was nothing sexual about this, it was sweet and loving and more than anything i ever wanted. 

*A few hours later* 

We laid in bed together, me curled into his side listening to him talk about his upbringing, school, and his family a little more. It fet so nice to just lay here with him and hear his stories, i listened to every word that left his mouth. He stopped abruptly and looked down at me with a pouty look on his face 

“can i ask you something?” he said with a whiny voice i giggled softly and nodded

“can we switch positions? Will you hold me?” i gigglle lighlty again and without saying anything i flipped over onto my back and he immediately curled into my side, laid his head on my chest and threw a leg over my waist. 

It must have been a funny sight, a man almost double my size laying onme like a child. But i loved it, i gently played with his still damp hair and listened to him continued with his stories. 

The conversation gradually shifted to the party we would be going to the following day 

“stay by my side tomorrow night, i dont wanna lose you” 

“ivar its just your family” 

“exactly! i would not want you getting stuck in a druken conversation with one of my brothers” I giggled lightly and ruffled his hair

“It will be okay Ivar” 

i saw his tone change almost immediately, he got tense all of s sudden as he sat up and leaned over to his bag 

“i actually have another question for you, i told them all you were my fiancé, so if thats okay with you ill introduce you as that. I have this to make it more believable. I know that after we leave here we will probably never see each other again, but after the party you can keep the ring as well. ” and he handed me a small ring box.

i opened it to reveal the most beautiful ring i had ever seen, not to mention it was also huge 

it was the ring i had always wanted.... and he knew it. I tried to shut those thoughts out of my head. 

i just nodded slightly and handed him the box, he placed it on the bedside table and shut off the light. 

When he laid back down he didn’t try to hold me, or cuddle into me again, he just laid next to me. 

The entire mood changed immediately, back to grey. 

I wanted to scream or cry, or bury myself away never to be seen again. 

I had finally opened back up to him, just for him to remind me that this is temporary, that we were nothing, and that when we got back. i would never see him again. 

i turned on my side facing the wall, i didnt want him to think that i was being petty or that i was mad at him. it was just, looking at him made everything harder. 

i fell for him, hard. I was in love with the man who had stalked me. He was the first and only person to see all of me. But we were nothing, and were not going to be anything. 

The thoughts kept pouring into my head, keeping me awake. I could not sleep knowing that the only person i have ever loved, stalked me and then madem e fall in love with him, not by force. 

Pretending to be in a relationship with him tomorrow won’t be difficult, because it came natural to me. I loved him, and i wanted him. Despite everything, i wanted the man who had stalked me. 

I heard his soft snoring, and i let out a small cry. I did not want him to worry, so i waited until he was asleep to let it out. 

All i wanted was to turn arounf curl into him, but i couldn’t. it would make it hurt more. 

i let myself cry until i was too exhausted to keep my eyes open, falling into a restless sleep. 

Taglist: 

@youbloodymadgenius​ @lostgirl14480​ @artstyle​

[yourdaddychan]

wow-

literally just wow- i genuinely have nothing to say about this please- i cannot explain how much this means to me- there's 1000 of us- *hugs all of you* [ especially the porn bots ] *turns into formal luna asf*

i remember when i started in may, just a tiny chatbot with only one mutual, only known to you guys as [ answer : admin ]. and now, almost a year later, i have 1k of my chainsaw eating demons who are metal as fuck 💪ive learned so much being on tumblr, as a part of both the skz writers community and the chatbot community. ive made a bunch of friends, lost a bunch of ones, and 1k of you stuck with me. i cannot begin to express my gratitude to all of you, and how much all of you and your interactions with me mean to me. all of the simping, the random stories, everything. i cherish all of it, and i love all of you. aight so letz get to the personal thanking asf

alsoer i kinda wanted to do something sexy so imma do what color they remind me of :D most of them can be found at this link : https://louisem.com/29880/color-thesaurus-infographic

@kvinly linn bb 🥺through all the drama we've been through and shit im so glad we ended up becoming friends again cause we're kinda sexy together 😉thank you so much for being my 1000th follower bb you mean so much to me and if anyone hurts you im about to *turns into jennie and kachows them* licherally lets nevah fight again

-> you remind me of the color punch , and not only because of the name- underneath that grr me edgy grr me bully you're just a softie simp and that reminds me of punch :D

@undeadbots steph 🥺lemme be your personal broken chopsticks pls :( KLDSKLD anywayz we've also gone through some sexy drama and thankfully you saw da light 😉and now look at us, with our own band, and our own producing line 🥺brohemian rhapsody for life bro 🥺 *big kithie for da best dad in da world :D*

-> you remind me of the color viridian , because it gives me confident vibes :D you carry yourself proudly and confidently as you should tbh go steph

@binniesthighs oh look its a cutie *pushes you to a mirror* right there :D RORORO YOUR BOAT :DD we havent talked too much, besides my simping for jisung- but you give me very sexy energy so imma propose rq *gets down on one knee* will you be the rororo to my boat 🥺thank you for being my moot :D

-> you remind me of the color espresso , because espresso looks like the color to be pretty chill and laid back, and you're all of those, and calming to be around

@toshis-flower BAYBEE BEBE BEEBEE :D thank you so much for being my moot and making me a wifey asf ‼️ you're literally so much like me whats not to love <3 JKSDJKD JKJK you're really sweet and really just a good person to rant to, i love you so so so much and i think im going to remarry you :D

-> you remind me of the color taffy , because you're sweet, cute, and bright :D *eats you* yummy

@lov3ric seyoung. i love you. so much. MY SOULMATEEEE :DD even though we tell the story over and over like a bunch of grandmas, ill still never forget how we became soulmates and then bonded over boba 🥺im licherally going to marry you one day like ez 💪also i wanna eat you can i eat you youre really cute *eats you*

-> you remind me of the color daffodil , because it reminds me of banana milk which reminds me of you tbh- buuuttt did you know that daffodils are one of the first flowers you see when spring starts? that definitely reminds me of you because through all of the cb drama, you've always been there with me, like literally always- i cannot express how much i love you *kithie*

@simpchimp LIDDLE CHEESE FUCKER THEMBO :DD drink water *spank* i love you so much you cutie 🥺you're also licherally the funniest person ever like stop bae i kinda need to be the funniest but noer its you 😔alsoer i love how random you are KDSKLD so nevah stop that because then *revz up arm* youre going to get luna-ified

-> you remind me of the color jam , because even though you seem kinda scary at first [ yes i was 100% scared of you ] you're really soft :D

@berrywoo the sun themself 💪you are easily the purest person ive met, and im so happy i somehow became moots with you :D you literally hit diff, yk? theres something about your personality and the way you act thats so comforting, and that means i eat you because youre too cute :D you cant just be a wholeass teacher for kids and expect not to get eaten kids are licherally demons whoever deals with them properly and treatz dem nicely gets a nom asf

-> you remind me of the color honey , because you're a sunshiney yellow, and you're sweet like honey :D i think you need to hear that its okay not to be okay bb, and you can come to my dms anytime you want to rant 😎

@yourchungha MS OG CHUNGHA MS IM KINDA SCARED OF THE SHIT YOU DO MS FURREH LOVER 101 MS ANNA BANANA :D yeah youre like really nice- thats all i have to say- like how tf do you deal with [ redacted ] like eggsplain- ALSO YOURE CARRYING OUR CONVERSATIONS BECAUSE IDK HOW TO TALK TO PEOPLE DKSJKD I LOVE YOU FOR THAT AND WE SHOULD HAVE LIKE ACTUAL CONVERSATIONS MORE OFTEN

-> you remind me of the color scarlet , because youre a sexy bitch tf and scarlet gives me 'idc what you think im hot' kinda vibes which is like exactly you

@satosimp WINTER DADDY :DD i lub you asf *insert we dont talk anymore by charlie daddy* ugh the way your personality matches mine is kinda sexy or whatever im also kinda in love with you but lets ignore that part 🙄 💪 *big kithes* *eats your cats casually*

-> you remind me of the color lilac , because it just gives me tsundere vibes, you act like you dont care but really do care :D you liddle sawftie *noms your cheekie*

@nightshade-minho DUCKIE :DD *insert we dont talk anymore by charlie daddy pt 2* licherally bae where the fuck are you i miss you you bettah be doing well in school otherwise im going to smack you with a chappal asf DSJJKSD *eats your cat because hes such a cutie*

-> you remind me of the color marigold , because you're adorable and sunshiney :D

@onigirimeeya MICHIE MICHIE MICHIEIEEIEI MY DAD :DDD i like you mucho much if you didnt know *kithes you* you're like one awf da best listeners ever- which is such a weirdass compliment but its true- you're really good at listening, and just being a comforting presence in general, like when you go to the beach and youre just staring at the waves all edgy mode, and it calms you down a fuck ton

-> you remind me of the color mint , for obvious reasons- mint choco chip cookie michie :DD

@hhjs bae we dont talk a lot but im kinda lurking on all of your posts- JKDSJSKD bae remarry me please youre really fucking hot 😭and the way you have with words is like damn- teach me oppar asf

-> you remind me of the color wine , because you're refined, and carry yourself in a way that makes everyone want to be you. the color wine is rich and deep, which reminds me of the way you write :D

@nsfw-stay MY LICHERAL BABIE YOUVE BEEN AN ANON FOR SUCH A LONG TIME AND WEVE TALKED ABOUT SO MUCH SHIT TOGETHER [ a lot about seungmin and jisung but shhh ] I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BB AND I WILL NOM YOU >:( BUT SOFTLY AND OUT OF LOVE *nomz yew* :D

-> you remind me of the color cerulean , because its a baby blue and what fits better than a baby blue yk? you're adorable and squishy and i want to nom you 24/7

@secretary-yeji *iz chan ig cause we dont talk admin to admin* oh erm gee is uncle chrith 😉DKLSKLD my liddle koala :D my liddle burgah :D my liddle aussie :D my besth frien :DDD evah since may i think we've been friends, and i think one of the highlights of that day was me marking you as spam twice and on accident too- LKSDKLSD WE DONT TALK ABOUT THAT anywayz thank yew for being uncle chrith's friend *kith*

-> you remind me of the color seafoam , because it's a very soft and light color yk, you're delicate asf which sounds like a bad thing now that im typing it BUT IT ISNT DSKLDSLK YOURE VERY CUTE YOU AND YOUR FLOOFY COWS :D

@ayolistenupp im kinda... in love with you? wtf? KDSDKSL MY DESI DADDY ASF I LOVE YOU SOER MUCH :D our music nights™️ mean so much to me, like theres just something so personal about listening to what the other person likes to hear even though half of your songs are sexy asf KLDSKLD

-> you remind me of the color ocean , because the ocean is loud but calming yk- like you're full of energy but you're also calming :D

@yanderexchungha OH ERM GEE YEW :O YOU PROBABLY WONT SEE THIS IN LIKE 10 MONTHS BESTIE MERRY CHRISTMAS IG KLDSLKD anyway i love you dad your lessons about vape >>> to quote your drunk ass exactly "vape isnt cool" JKSDJ anyway its gonna be sexy if we accidentally run into each other in the hallwayz asf

-> you remind me of grey cause youre a hag- JKJK KDJSD you remind me of the color caramel , because you're sweet, and licherally addictive caramel isnt good for my braces but i keep eating it 😰but youre addictive in a good way :D

@yanderelee literally only doing this because you were moping about not having a simp sunday and im such a good person 🥸you're cool 💪and unfortunately, you're funny too 😥and even though i bully you asf dont take it personally because i dont mean it asf

-> you remind me of the color dijon mustard because you just give those hacker vibes please dont hack me after i said this i like to keep my location private

@kpopswitchbot BESTIE 😏MY FIRST MUTUAL 😏 LICHERALLY DA BEST CUTEST FUNNIEST SMARTEST SEXIEST KEWLEST I CANT EVEN EXPRESS WITH WORDS FISHIE IN DA WORLD :D LICHERALLY STOP OUTDOING ME WITH YOUR GOODNIGHTS LIKE *spankz yew* YOURE LITERALLY TOO GOOD WITH WORDS ITS NOT FAIR- AND THE DAY YOU JUST TALKED TO ME IN SHAKESPEAREAN BECAUSE I FELT DOWN- AND EXPRESSED YOUR LOVE THAT WAY LIKE- PLEASE I ACTUALLY ADORE YOU AND I WILL LITERALLY EAT YOU ONE DAY

-> you remind me of the color coffee , not only because youre addicted to it but also because of the way you act, you're like the definition of an old soul- with the words you use, the drama kid you are asf, etc- you're a talented bitch *mwah* i love you so much you also remind me of those movies where they find an old ass book and they kinda hafta dust it off and it gives you treasure or something cause yeah that reminds me meeting you

AIGHT DAS IT ASF MWAH I LOVE YOU ALL :DDD

[peachiikawa]

Caged Bird | Prince!Oikawa Tooru x Reader

a/n: if you know anything about fairytales then you might realize that the reader has the flute of the pied piper, though modified for the story. been watching a lot of once upon a time and got the idea from the neverland arc. hope you enjoy!

word count: 1.9k

genre: fantasy, romance

trigger warnings: reader gets hurt a bit but nothing graphic

summary: oikawa has always lived a lonesome life in the cage that is his castle. one day he sneaks out and a beautiful melody leads him to you, a traveling musician. oikawa is about to find out that his luck is going to change for the better.

oikawa gazed out over the town from his balcony

he let out a long sigh as he grew bored from his studies

“why the long face trashykawa?”

his bestfriend and knight walked up next to him and leaned against the railing

“oh you know, just bored of being in this castle. theres a whole town of people out there and im stuck in here. gets tiring after a while”

iwaizumi listened to his friend and nodded along to what he was saying

“then sneak out for a day”

oikawas eyes widened

“youd help me sneak out?”

“only if you come back by sundown”

so oikawa grabbed his cloak and thanks to iwas help got out of the castle

despite being born and raised in this town oikawa had no idea where he was

and after about ten minutes he was completely and utterly lost

until he heard the faint sound of a flute

he followed the sound until he ended up in the mostly cleared out town square where he saw you playing a small wooden flute for those who were present, though you had no audience

everyone walked past you as if you were invisible like you werent playing such a beautiful song

he approached you slowly and listened until you finished your performance

“that was really good”

you looked up at him and smiled

“always a pleasure to play for those who need it”

the bright smile on your face felt warm and inviting

like he was meant to be here

“would you like to take a seat next to me?”

you gestured to the spot next to you and he gladly took it

“so...whats your story”

hes hesitant to answer your question

“ill tell you mine if you tell me yours”

you set your flute down in your bag next to you

“well first of all my names y/n and my life is nothing too interesting. im a traveling performer and play my flute as a way to pass time and help those who need it. always come across the most interesting people this way”

traveling. thats something oikawa could only dream of

“so cmon now tell me about you”

he peaked at you through his hood

“ok but dont make a big commotion..im oikawa tooru”

you laughed a bit

“thats funny you share the same name as the prince”

you stopped laughing when you saw the serious look in his eyes

“oh..oh! im so sorry for being so rude!”

you started to scramble around when he grabbed your wrists to stop your movements

“shh yes im the prince but stop flailing people are starting to look”

once you had calmed down he went on

“ive been confined to my castle my whole life and stuck to certain rules i have to follow. it seems like even if i catch a break something else comes along. i have to stay this perfect image because im the prince and it just gets so lonely. its as if im a bird trapped in a cage and theres no way out”

ah so there it is

the reason he could hear your flute

you picked a flower that was growing next to you and placed it in his hair as you spoke

“im sorry your lifes been like that but oikawa, if i may be so bold, even a caged bird will become wise enough to break free. the dream of flying is too great to resist”

Once you had properly placed the flower you smiled at him before standing up from your spot and grabbing your bag

you then held your hand out to him

but he couldnt gather his thoughts

you were so bright it was almost blinding

“now cmon! lets go have some fun!”

he looked at the hand held out to him

and with a leap of faith, he took it

he was going to get out of this cage, this perpetual cycle

and finally add some meaning to his life

day after day you two spent your time together

oikawas days that were once filled with hollow words and empty actions were now filled with happiness

filled with you

and everyday slowly but surely he was falling for you

passing glances turned into prolonged gazes

his heart could no longer stay still around you

you became the key to his happiness

but for now...he had to be content with just being next to you

it would be too selfish otherwise

to ask you to stay with him here in the kingdom...he could never trap you like that

“so what are we doing today y/n?”

you were strolling through the town on a quiet sunday afternoon like you had the last few sundays

“how about we go to the bakery? theyre usually busy but since its sunday i bet its not as packed and then i want to take you somewhere”

he was curious as to what you had in store but decided against asking questions

so you two got some baked goods and headed out towards the woods

“cmon we’re almost there”

you pushed some branches and shrubs out of the way

and one eventually hit him in the face

“watch it y/n! i keep getting wacked by you”

you just chuckled a bit which oikawa had found adorable in itself

it made his heart slow just hearing it

“just come on!”

eventually you two made it to a clearing over a beautiful lake

he didnt know that there was something like this so close by

he was absolutely amazed by it

“take a seat oikawa! we can rest and eat here!”

this moment was just too perfect to him

with you here he felt as if nothing bad could happen

that if he only could see your smile everything would be alright

being content with just being at your side...was no longer and option

he knew that if he wanted this he needed to take his chance

“y/n”

your eyes were full of life and he couldnt help but feel so happy next to you

and before he knew it he was closing the gap between the two of you with a hand gently cradling your cheek

but right before you two could kiss you were ripped away from him

“dont you dare touch the prince commoner!”

oikawa frantically looked around as many of his guards came out of the brush

“get your hands off of them!”

you were pressed to the ground and the sight almost broke his heart

“sorry your highness but we’re under strict orders to bring you back and throw whoever was seducing you to leave the castle into the dungeon”

the guard that had been on you lifted you up like you were a sack and bound you by rope

you gave oikawa a final smile before you were taken away even though you were so banged up that it made him want to puke

he was speechless

this is what he was talking about

being so controlled and monitored made him feel so small and helpless

and he absolutely abhorred it

“your highness your mother is waiting for you in the throne room”

oikawa was beyond upset

this isnt how he wants to live

“mother how could you throw the only good thing in my life away!”

his mother sneered at his words

“only good thing? what need to you have for that filthy peasant! and how dare you cast me aside as if i hadnt given you everything you own, everything you are is because of me! i will not allow for any of this nonsense! now go wash up. and dont you dare ever leave the castle again and i forbid you from seeing that nasty peasant again. wasting your time with such a person...”

he gritted his teeth and was about turn to leave

his emotions were running too high

he wasnt himself and he knew it

but even so...he wont allow it to end like this

he was going to end it on his terms

“no”

“what did you say?”

he stood his ground

“i said no mother. im going to live the way i want and with who i want. ill gladly give up my title because frankly, i never wanted it in the first place. and dont you ever call y/n filthy or nasty again. their so incredibly kind and full of joy and laughter. i can only hope to be like that one day. so ive decided that im leaving. with y/n.”

as soon as the doors shut behind him he let out the breath he didnt even know he was holding

but it also felt as if there was a giant weight off of him now

“im coming y/n dont you worry”

it had been a couple hours since you were brought to your cell

you didnt have any major injuries, just a few cuts and scratches from when you were body slammed to the ground

“do you mind if i play?”

you pulled out your flute and the guard nodded

“thank you!”

you started playing and filled the cell you were in with a relaxing tune

“why do you play if it doesnt make noise?”

you stopped and looked at the spiky haired man who stood outside your cell

“it takes a certain person to appreciate its music”

he just looked at you as if you were crazy

but you continued anyways

until you heard frantic running coming from down the hall

“iwa you gotta let them out”

oikawa was panting trying to catch his breath

“dude no offense but your mom would kill me and you if i just let them out”

oikawa grabbed the key from iwaizumis waist before he even realized what had happened

“dont worry about it iwa. and dont worry about me. today i start my new life. it was good knowing you buddy”

they gripped hands the way they always had. A solemn but knowing look was shared between them

“if i had known me letting you leave the castle one time would lead to this...i would have done it a lot sooner. good luck out there bud”

oikawa quickly turned to you and helped you off of the ground

“you ready to run?”

he cupped your cheek and ran his thumb over one of the small cuts

hed be sure to treat that later

you nodded and leaned into his hand

“are you sure this is what you want?”

you were happy to leave with him

its more than you could ever ask for

“y/n youre the only person thats made me feel free. and by doing this i will be.”

you two finally got to share the kiss you had been deprived of and not only was it full of love but also full of hope for your future

“then lets go”

and you two sprinted off to your next adventure together

the flute you possessed was one he could no longer hear the sound of after that day

for it was enchanted, only to be be heard by those who were lost and lonely

with you he was neither anymore

and he couldnt be any happier than living out the rest of his days with you as a free man, a bird outside of its cage

[shhh-no-ones-home]

not an obituary javier pena x reader

+++++++++

i am in my feels, hello yes, it is sad boi hours. holy shit this is depressing as hell.

tw: strong mentions and themes of self harm, abuse, death, and past traumas. read at your own risk.

to anyone dealing with this it is okay to reach out, to get help, and to even feel this way. what matters most is your health and safety and just know that it absolutely does get better, i promise. i went through it and i know first hand, you will get through this, and you will live a beautiful life.

song: dead butterflies by architects 

tag list: @cynic-spirit

+++++++++

my hands shook as i listened to the ringing of the receiver. i had been crying for hours and my face was still stained by tears. i was only just beginning to calm down, staring at the broken mirror in front of me. god i looked so tired. how did i let this happen again? i said id never let this happen again. well. i guess i hadnt broken my promise yet. i hadnt actually done anything, but the thoughts alone made me feel like i was betraying myself. i squeezed my eyes closed tightly. maybe i should just hang up and let it run its course. then i heard the ringing stop.

"pena."

he said urgently and i felt a sob leave my body.

"hello?"

he asked, a little concerned and the tears started again.

"javi i need help."

i said, crying into the phone as i slid down the wall of my bathroom.

"im leaving now, dont do anything till i get there."

he sounded so worried. but in all fairness he had every right to be. i had told him about my past, at his request, but i still did it. it was hard to hide them given our usual past time so i figured i might as well. he knew where the scars on my body came from. each one had a story that i longed to forget, the new bruises on my wrist just bellow one of them. it was from the rubber band i refused to take off, being apparent of a better habit i had once picked up. it was just enough pain. but what does one do when that isnt enough?

"hurry."

i whispered before the phone went dead. my whole body shook as i kept coming back to the memories of how it felt the first time. god i craved it. i wanted that life back but id come so far. i shook my head as i pressed my forehead into my knees. i just want it to go away. i want the suffering to go away, the memories, the way it felt then and the way it feels now. i could easily let it go now, i knew a million and one ways. but javi was already on his way. i couldnt do that to him. i couldnt let him find me like that. especially not after he'd pushed me to celebrate a decade of being clean. ten whole years of not hurting myself. i almost couldnt believe it. it felt like such a long time when i heard it out loud like that.

"y/n!"

i heard, snapping my attention to the bathroom door as it swung open. javi was staring down at me with a worried look on his face but he sighed in relief when he saw me still fully intact.

"jesus, you scared the shit out of me."

he said, standing beside me and sliding down the wall to sit beside me. i just stared at him, eyes blurry as he looked back to me.

"i cant do it anymore."

i croaked out, feeling another hot tear slip down my cheek. he looked at me with the utmost pity before kissing my forehead and pulling me into his side.

"talk to me, please, what happened?"

he said softly, petting my hair as i pushed my face into his chest. i just shook my head.

"i dont want to feel this way again."

i mumbled against him, moving my hand into his. i looked down at them together as he ran his thumb over the back of my hand.

"when was the last time you left the house?"

he asked and i bit my lip, watching as he turned my hand over. i felt so guilty in that moment. he knew the answer, i hadnt been to work in over a week.

"would you mourn me?"

i asked and he pulled me up, holding my head in his hands and looking between my eyes. i wanted to cry again, seeing now just how broken he was too.

"you know i would."

he said softly and i nodded, closing my eyes but only for a moment. i looked back at him as he pressed his thumbs through the tear tracks on my face, pushing them away.

"but you and i both know i dont do funerals."

he said and i let out a shaky laugh, watching as he tried to flash me a smile, albeit unconvincing.

"i dont think i could trust anyone else to write my eulogy though."

i said and he moved his hands slowly away from me, taking my hand back in his.

"well if i have any say in it, you wont need one for a long while."

i glanced over his face a few times before he stood up, pulling me to my feet too. he brought me out into the living room and it was the first time id really had a good look at the damage id caused. my furniture was all flipped about, glass shattered from the flower vase on my coffee table and the water from it poured out onto the rug. if anything it reflected exactly how i felt about the situation. i sighed at the sight of it.

"ya know,"

i started, taking his attention as we made it passed the wreckage and to the door. he paused as he reached for it.

"once upon a time i wanted so badly for my address to be six feet under."

he looked over my face again as i spoke.

"but even all the depression in the world couldnt make me leave you."

i said and he just stared at me for a second. when i looked down and moved to open the door he pulled me into a tight hug, holding me like id slip away if he let go or loosened his grip. i hugged him back like my life depended on it, and in that moment it felt like it did.

"ill do everything i can to keep you safe."

he whispered before kissing the side of my head. i breathed deeply, feeling some of my stresses melt away as i inhaled him.

"as long as thats true i promise to stay out of the paper."

i said as he pulled away, nodding once at me and opening the door.

"if i ever got that call i dont know what id do with myself."

he confessed as we made our way to the stairs of the apartments that led outside. i side nodded.

"i guess we'll never find out."

i said, offering my pinky as we stepped into the warm open air of the Columbian summer. he just looked at me for a second before interlocking his pinky with mine.

"thats a deal. now lets go get you something to eat, im sure you could use it."

he mentioned and i laughed a little, looping my arm around his as we made our way down the street. i watched the ground for a moment as we walked, thinking how lucky i was to have him in my life. how lucky i was to be able to live for someone that wasnt myself, because the one thing they never tell you is that if you arent tethered to someone it makes it that much easier to let go. now i had someone who would look after me, keep me dependable, and keep me alive. even if he didnt know it. i half smiled at the thought, slipping my hand in his and swinging our arms back and forth. he just looked at me and i kissed his shoulder lightly.

"thank you javier, i dont know what i would do without you."

[pinkbutterfly84]

48 Hours of Hell - Happy's POV

H - Sly where is the Doc? I wanted to say bye before I head out

S - um he's gone Happy, took Walts car think he had an errand to run

H - oh ok thanks Sly, have a good night oh and by the way you were amazing today in that plane

S - thanks Happy it was a difficult case but we did it, never going back to Chernobyl again though

Happy laughed as she walked out the garage, as she got in her truck she sent a message to Toby

'Hey Doc, Sly said you had some stuff to do call me when your home'

A few hours later Happy was home tinkering on an old engine keeping one eye on her phone, she hadn't heard from Toby and it has been 3 hours since she left the garage. She picked up her phone and called him, it went straight to answerphone

H - hey doc where are you, Sly said you were running errands but even you can't take 3 hours. Call me back

A couple of hours later Happy was shattered it had been a busy day they'd been to Chernobyl, saved the world from another Chernobyl and now the dipstick who called himself her boyfriend was awol and she was starting to worry old habits had kicked in. She would dump his arse so quickly if he was gambling again. She called him again and it went straight to voicemail again!

H - Dumbass where the hell are you i swear if you are gambling again im gonna kick your arse so far you will no longer be the only member of the team not to have visited Chernobyl. You better have a good explanation at breakfast and your buying so don't be late.

Happy went to bed fuming ready to rip Toby a new one in the morning.

The next morning Happy arrived at Kavalskis and sat in thier usual booth, Toby was late which was unusual for him, since he slept through thier first date he always picked her up or arrived early, she knew he did it so she would never feel like she did in that restaurant again. Which she would of thought was sweet if she wasn't already so pissee at him.

Happy phoned him, straight to voicemail again

H - where the hell are you Doc and why is your phone dead? I'm giving you 20 more minutes otherwise I will meet you at the garage and kick your arse there

20 minutes went by, she gave him another 10 and spent it planning all the ways she could hurt him but it was really a distraction from thinking about the reality of if he'd gone back to a casino and got himself hooked on roulette or worse beaten up by loan sharks. Happy made her way back to the garage on her bike, she walked in and threw her helmet down

H - is that hat wearing dipstick here

......................................................................................

Happy walked out the garage tears streaming down her face. She had never felt like this before she couldn't get the look of heartbreak and confusion on Tobys face off her mind.

She sat in her truck luckily she had parked it in a unlit quiet area of the road. She let it all out, she wasn't a crier but she had never felt like this before Toby was the first person she truly loved and let herself be loved. She knew he would would be hurt when he found out she was married but thought she would sit down with him alone and told him the full story, sure he would be upset but he would understand. Having to turn down his proposal, tell him at the same time and do it publicly was something she has never thought would happen.

She needed to collect herself, calm down and go back and talk to him alone.

Was Toby ever going to forgive her, what happens if he turns to gambling, what happens if he leaves her for good. She was used to people leaving her but she never had anyone she loved leave her it would break her.

Suddenly someone knocked on the window, she wiped her face and rolled the window down a touch. Walter stood the other side looking very uncomfortable

H - hows Toby?

W - drowning his sorrows in tequila refusing to talk to anyone. Why did you refuse his proposal?

H - what the hell Walt im not accepting his proposal with such a huge secret hanging over our heads. I'm going back in to tell him everything in s minute

W - Happy please you can't not yet, not until we have a solution so I can stay in the country. He loves you so much he will want us to divorce and I wil have to leave the country and Scorpion will split up

H - are you going to make me chose between the man I love and my family?

W - no I'm just asking for some time to come up with a solution so we are all happy

H - fine but I won't lie to him and I won't stop him looking if he finds out he finds out. I am going yo marry him and I won't build our relationship out of lies and mistrust

W - ok Happy, why don't you go home and sleep ill look after Toby and tomorrow you can talk things out im sure tomorrow Toby will feel differently

H - I'm not sure Walt I've never seen him look so broken, you have to promise me you wont let him out on a gambling bender he stays here or you go home with him

W - you have my word

Happy rolled the Windows up turned over the ignition and went home, she cried herself to sleep and slept on and off until Cabe called with an urgent case.

.....................................................................................

Happy followed Toby and Sly out of the garage and caught up with Toby

H - hey doc

T - hey Hap, look im really tired I don't think I've slept in well over 48 hours can we talk tomorrow?

H - I know doc I was gonna ask if you were coming back to mine, you can sleep and we can talk in the morning

Toby looked at Happy, it hurt her that he didn't immediately say yes he was always bugging her to stay over or her to stay at his but she liked a few nights a week on her own, gave her chance to think evaluate and she supposed keep some sort of distance and independence. The fact he wasn't sure about staying over shows how hurt he is.

H - come on you know my bed is much more comfy then yours

T- ok Hap but I have 101 questions for the morning

Happy hoped up into the truck as Toby walked around and got in

H - I know you have questions Doc but as I said I can't answer them all now but I will I promise

Toby leant his head back on the head rest and sighed

T - I know but you gotta know how much this is killing me

Happy didn't answer she drove them both home i silence. When they got home they both headed straight to bedroom getting unchanged they both got into bed. Toby sat up slightly as Happy lay on his chest with her arm over his stomach, she could feel he was uncomfortable and that was something she had never felt before.

T - I need to ask why, why keep it from me I get you wont tell me who but st least tell me why the secrecy

H - when we were friends it didn't seem appropriate, then as we got closer and closer I got scared, scared you wouldn't understand scared you would leave and then it got harder and harder to bring it up as the consequences git more real the more I fell for you

T - Happy you must know it would take a hell of a lot more then this for me to leave you, I have never loved anyone like I love you, your my world and I wanted to spend thd rest of my life with you

H - wanted to? Does that mean you dont anymore

T- of course not i want to live every day with you but we need to get over this first before we can plan our future

H - I know Doc i really sm sorry I couldn't bare the thought of you leaving me too

Happy coluld feel the silent tears dropping onto Tobys naked chest

T - that will never happen, you can't get rid of me that easily but im not going to lie this is going to take some time and I will be looking into who you are married too

H - Toby!

T - look if you wont tell me you leave me no choice

H - fair enough but I will tell you soon I promise I just need some time

T - I love you Happy and im sorry I said I rescinded the proposal when we get this mess sorted I plan to get back down on one knee

H - ok Doc and I promise no more secrets when you do, I love you too

T - I'm knackered now, sleep now talk more tomorrow

H - I never thought I would hear a time when you want to delay talking

Happy leaned up and they kissed softy

H - night Doc

Happy lay there listening to Toby sleeping what a 48hours, she needed to sort this mess out with Walt and she just hoped Toby would leave the investigation work to real detectives and give her the time she needed......

[hyeri-yah]

SONGS I ASSOCIATE THE SEVENTEEN MEMBERS WITH

I'll make this into a tag game ksksksks

List songs in your playlist and strictly on your phone playlist which you associate the Seventeen members with! It's up to you if u wanna add an explanation!

Tagging: @serriannah, @shuasvteen, @woozisnoots, @shoshishua + everyone who wants to do it!!

Seungcheol

• Raise Your Flag - Man with a Mission

• Epiphany - Taylor Swift

Seungcheol reminds me of Orga from MSG: Iron Blooded Orphans and Jihoon as Mikazuki (if u watched it ull know), but he's the leader, the one who'll "raise the flag" and sing the battle cry or something . On the other hand, Seungcheol is also soft and vulnerable, which matches well with Epiphany, which talks about moments of dreaming before the battle.

Jeonghan

• Angel of Mine - Monica

• Bad Boy, Good Man - Tape Five

Oh this guy,,, yeah he's an Angel but sometimes...not. Jeonghan is a caring person and a really good listener, which makes him truly an angel. But c'mon let's face it this guy is mischievous 😂 which is why i listed the second song,,, he has this suave, playboy like aura skksks just listen to the second song, you'll get it.

Joshua

• Time Machine - Goosehouse

• La Vie En Rose

Joshua to me is like a calming energy,,, he kinda looks like a really pastel kind of person 😂 that's why i picked "light-toned" songs! And these are quite acoustic songs for our guitar man. No. I wont pick generic Sunday Morning

Jun

• 戀愛ing - 五月天

• Lovely Icecream Princess Sweetie - Egoist

Jun to me is a sweet child 😂 he reminds me of the feeling I have when I watch Kung Fu Hustle or any Stephen Chow movie ksksks that's why I picked the first song bc it's a really funny and cute song!! The second one reminds me that even though he's like a child, he can still be quite sexy and alluring! It's an upbeat song which is actually perfect for dancing!

Soonyoung

• All Star - Smash Mouth

• Sugar Song & Bitter Step - Unison Square Garden

Ahhhh this guy....he makes me laugh so much I have to list songs that make me laugh 😂 the first one i remember hearing on Shrek,, the second song is fantastic (it's an ending song for an anime and the animation for it is such a fun and energetic dance,,, probably one of the best anime endings) I wish I can list Eye of the Tiger but I dont have it on my phone :((

Wonwoo

• Utakata Hanabi - Supercell

• Cardigan - Taylor Swift

After I heard Wonwoo say that he likes IU songs, I just associate him now with ballads or slow songs 😂 These songs are both lovely and soft and dramatic 😂 Wonwoo to me is that kind of person!

Jihoon

• All the Small Things - Blink182

• Saturday Night Waltz - Aaron Copland performed on piano by Anderson & Roe

Alright the first song...it's not alluding to anything ok!! It's rock but has a warm and touching lyrics that matches well with Jihoon's rough exterior but is really soft and sentimental in the inside. Also, I wouldn't let it pass not to add a classical music piece in this list!! And ofc i'll give it to Jihoon bc he's the one who was classically trained in music,,, and this piece is actually beautiful!!

Minghao

• Royals - Lorde

• Welcome to the Black Parade - My Chemical Romance

Hao has this mysterious and dark vibe with him that reminds me of a Fae Prince or something 😂 that's why i picked these two songs where i think reflects his classy taste on things and his rather reflective kind of personality despite the brooding vibe 😂

Mingyu

• Gorgeous - Taylor Swift

• Back For You - One Direction

I mean this guy is idol material,,, gorgeous and cheesy to his fans 😂😂😂 ill let the songs explain themselves

Seokmin

• Defying Gravity - Wicked

• Summer Sunshine - The Corrs

DK to me is literal sunshine!!!! That's why I picked the second song!! It's upbeat , energetic and fun!! I picked the first song bc of how he had already performed in a musical, of how im sure he can perfect this song, and how he has literally defied gravity with his talents and hardwork!!!

Seungkwan

• FLY HIGH!! - Burnout Syndromes

• Mr. Chu - A-Pink

Well....Seungkwan is huge a volleyball fan and I'm pretty sure he had watched Haikyuu in some way or another 😂 but I do think the story of Hinata matches him quite well!! And with Mr. Chu...well he did sing this song,,, and i also heard this song in a clip of idol room 😂😂😂

Vernon

• Waltz of Anomalies (cover) - (Vocaloid) Kamikita Ken

• Daybreak Frontline Rap Cover - (Vocaloid) Fantastic Youth

I picked songs which are sorta niche, and no one used to mainstream music would probably heard of these songs, which reminds me of how Vernon can be quite "niche"... he's different and eccentric sometimes and u dont know what's going on in his head 😂 but if u get to know him, u'll be fascinated and intrigued! Just like these songs!!

Chan

• Dinosaur - AKMU

• Me! - Taylor Swift ft. Brendon Urie

The first one is a joke i'll admit that lmaoooooo but it's such a nice song by akmu 😂 with the second song, dino often reminds me of my cousin who wants just a little bit of attention, and this song is really perfect like...just with the lyrics "there's no awesome without me"....well....

That's all!! Thank you for coming to my tedtalk sksjhdjshs i mostly had alt rock/anime songs in my phone so there's that 😂😂😂

I really had fun with this tho!!! I hope u guys would try it too!!

[legion1993]

Never Let Me Go

Never let me go

A/N : this is just a small little tiny story to get myself out of a writing block.. im branching for a moment or 2 away from the world of Supernatural and into a similar but very different universe! lets see how this goes!

Pairing: Kol Mickelson x Reader

Tags: fluff, flirty talk, some dirty talk, touring new orleans, Kol turning you into a vampire at your request, mean drunks trying to get you alone, Kol saving you, anything along those lines

Summmery: not mine to give…

Masterlist

This was to be the day, the start of your new life. You had moved to new orleans, more specifically into the french quarter to get away from your past.

You arrive at night, walking from the airport to the french quarter you find the streets alive with music, dancing, musicians and most importantly drunks.

You head to your apartment, putting in your stuff you decide to go check out the closest pub. walking through the quarter, you could only marvel at the sights that lay before you. this was you new home this was your fresh start.

Kol was sitting in the very pub you were just outside of… Kol was sitting in his favorite spot by the door, so he could see everyone who was entering, see if he could find the gem through all the drunks.

you walked in a few moments later and for Kol it felt as though time slowed down… he watched you head to the bar and order a drink. you ordered just a normal vodka and Sprite… you made it a double even, you were not sure how to start over in a new place. 

Kol watches you making sure that no harm comes to you, but indeed there were alot of drunk idiots in the pub that night. you were one of the only gems he has seen walk through that bar that very night. 

at that moment his hearing picked up a conversation between a few of the guys a few tables away , he began to tense up listening to them talk, it made his blood boil… then his thoughts and watchful gaze were interrupted by a hand being placed on his shoulder… 

 rebekah: “chill brother its just me…” 

Kol: “what are you doing here beks?” 

rebekah: “nick sent me to find you, he was worried that you might be causing trouble during this night…” 

kol: “nope im just keeping my eyes peeled for the new and exciting…” 

rebekah: “you mean like that girl, that you keep staring at?” 

Kol nods turning back to stare at you some more, then he realizes that the guys that were talking about your physique before were now heading towards you. 

Rebekah watched the look in her brothers eyes turn from just gazing in love to worried and ready to strike should the need arise… both of them now watching the following events unfold.

 Meat head 1: “hey pretty thing wanna come with me and have some fun?“ 

You sip slowly at your drink before answering. 

YN: “no thank you.“ 

Meat head 2: “your new here arent you? And from the smell of things your a virgin too…”

 This made you go radio silent, you tensed up at the feeling of their hands traveling over your body. This sight made Kol get up off his chair and come barging through their stances. 

 Kol: “leave her alone you stupid muts…" 

You look at Kol his eyes piercing your soul, kol keeps an eye on both those muts as he helps you off the chair and you both start walking towards rebekah… little did you both know that tonight was the first night of the rest of both your lives.

Kol and you run the opposite way of the pub going away from the muts and arriving at a gate surrounded by mass amounts of archetecture… you marvelled at the structure, kols hand tightened round your own.. 

Kol: “come on chica, i have some people who are very anxious to meet you…”

YN: “you kmow if you had approached me sooner i wouldnt have stopped you from touching my leg the way those guys were.”

Kol: “i definately would have done so and made sure no one saw anything…”

YN: “well what do you want to do right now? Any risks you want to take at this precise moment?”

Kol had to think cause yes there were risks he wanted to take but he wanted to try one specific thing at that moment but being a gentlemen he decided to just close the space between the 2 of you. 

The feeling of his skin against your own, the twinkle to his eyes in the moonlight, the way he spoke made you feel week at the knees. But instead of your mind being careful with your thoughts, they started being the exact opposite. 

Kol: “i think ive fallen for you…”

That was the last thing said for a while, cause as he said that last word he kissed you, he had cupped your cheeks and kissed you. In that moment nothing else mattered, in that moment all else seemed useless… 

5 minutes later the kiss broke and both of you took in a gasp of breathing… before another word would be spoken a gust of wind past by the both of you.

YN: “dont let anything happen to me please..”

Kol: “i promise i wont… ill never let you come to harm…”

You both walked inside the gate, the first thing that catches your eye is the architecture… the next thing that catches your attention is the number of people in the room… 

Rebekah: “see, i told you all that it was true…”

Elijah: “so it seems.. what do you make of this Niklaus?”

Niklaus: “i think our brother seems to have found himself someone new.. shall we meet her? Welcome back brother… rebekah told us what happened… you both are very lucky… come forward with her brother, so we may all have a chat…”

Kol and you join them at the table, not knowing what to expect but sitting there you held onto kols hand knowing that whatever the outcome he would not leave your side.

Kol: “i just realized we didnt be properly introduced… im Kol…”

YN: “YN its nice to meet you, all of you actually… im new in town i just moved in today… but kol can you please explain why you called those guys in the pub muts….”

Elijah: “muts are werewolves they are always thinking with their downstairs brain not their brain brain…”

You had stood and moved away from the table slightly  at the mention of werewolves… your brain trying now to make sense of everything that has just been said… 

YN: “werewolves are not supposed to exist… they are not supposed to exist period… i dont suppose there is a way to make more sense of all of this…”

Klaus: “i suppose you should also know that i am part werewolf and part vampire, my brother Elijah is a vampire, my sister rebekah is a vampire, our other sister Freya is a witch and kol is a vampire…”

at that moment you backed up and ran up the stairs and into the first open room you could… you were scared, well that was obvious… you sat on the bed and kicked off your shoes took off your jacket and started trying to breathe… you were not sure of what was happening, the man you now were in love with was a vampire…

something that should not exist and the fact that it did made you concerned, you had never given much thought to the possible existence of the supernatural though having kissed one now opened your eyes to what exists that should not…

a few moments of sitting there later you hear your name being called… you say nothing but instead flop backward on the bed… you let out a long exhale of breath, before turning your head towards the door to see Kol standing there…

Kol: “im sorry love, you shouldnt have found out that way… not about any of this… i had plans to tell you the truth after you had settled in to life in new orleans. i never meant for you to be ambushed like that… truth is your the first girl in a very very long time that has made me feel alive again…”

YN: “Kol tell me the truth, would you have even bothered with me if i had not been in trouble…”

 kol had now come to lay kinda beside you on the bed as he propped himself up on his elbow and smiled. 

Kol: “i would have come up to you as soon as you walked in that door… i wouldnt have let those muts say anything mean or dirty about you, we would have drank and drank till the late hours and partied more in the dirtiest ways possible. Cause from the moment i saw you, my entire world has spun slower like im normal again…”

 YN: “then why would your brother out you all to me like that… does he have no considerstion for feelings?”

  Kol: “nope, he is actually always an ass… but he loves me all the same… now i can think of a few things we can do to brighten up the mood but we need some scotch first..” 

You sat up once he left the bed going to the table in the corner and thats when the words spilt out of your lips so fast that your filter left you entirely. 

YN: “turn me Kol…” 

You had no idea you had even been thinking that till you said it… kol came right back to lay beside you, he knew what you had said and he thought he knew why, but there was still reassurance needed before a decision this big could be fully made.

kol: “are you sure that is what you want?” 

YN: “I came to New Orleans for a fresh start, now finding you, being with you in this moment this is my fresh start… This is where I now belong.”

 Kol: “before I turn you there is something I want to do first, so we do this properly…”

 You kinda look at him confusingly but he gets up and helps you up as well. Kol walks you to the stair case and then tells you to hold on for a moment, then he is back in front of you and down on one knee… 

Kol: “family I invite you to bare witness to this momentous occasion… I’m not sure if any of you heard what me and YN were discussing but she came here for a fresh start, she wants me to turn her she wants a completely fresh start. But I want to do something properly first, she and I shared a moment before I brought her in to meet you guys… we could feel it in our hearts we are meant to be together but i want to do things right by me, her and our family name… so YN akthough we only just met, this is love at first sight and truly happy we shall be if you will do me the incredible honor of marrying me?” 

You smile not looking directly at the ring but at the man holding it, he was your new start, he was your future, he was your soulmate! You hold out your hand and feel the cool metal sliding cross your finger, kol stands up to be face to face level with your eyes!

 YN: “yes!” 

Kol: “Elijah, dear brother, will you do the honor of officiating this momentous ceremony?”

 Elijah was beside you in seconds, he took your hand in his and placed a kiss to the back of it…

 Elijah: “I’m happy my brother has found a eternal love! It will be my highest honor to officiate your ceremony!”

Kol: “i guess we have a wedding to plan…”

YN: “elgance is a must, but we need to set a date…”

rebekah and Klaus are upstairs with you in a few moments… 

Rebekah: “what about we have the wedding in a week… more than enough time to pull something together… omg i get a sister… this is so exciting… alright so i already have several ideas for your wedding and the dress obviously we are going together in the next few days…”

YN: “yes i have several ideas as well infact if we go tomorrow rebekah you can help me carry a few of my bags back here and i can show you my wedding notes…”

Rebekah: “yes of course and Elijah obviously will accompany us to and from the retrieval of your bags so we can both see your notes… of course Kol will also see the notes but that might be after he finishes the errands im gonna send him on…”

Elijah: “naturally of course i will be delighted to grace this magnificant city with my prescence.”

Kol skowls at his sister and then smiles at you…

Kol: “cant wait sis…”

you stood beside kol and smiled, his brother and his sister except for Klaus was warming up rather nicely… Klaus was skeptical as he always was about every change that affected his family.

 Klaus: “brother may I have a few words with you…. Brother to brother. Rebekah can you take the soon to be newest member of our family and get her set up in kols quarters… He will be along after our little chat…” 

Kol smiled as he leaned down to kiss you, he pulled back and released you into the care of his sister. 

Kol: “lead the way Nik…”

 Kol follows Klaus as you are left with Rebekah and Elijah standing on the stairs. 

{~*A/N this is where it’s gonna get a little confusing… It’s gonna be splitting off into 2 separate convos… One between Rebekah and YN. And one between Kol and Klaus… Don’t worry this story will end with a happily eternal after. Back to the story. *~}

———————-

Kol and Klaus go into the lower chambers, so neither side can hear the conversations. Klaus shuts the gate behind him after Kol enters the room and he speeds pinning his brother to the wall…

Klaus: “what the hell is wrong with you? brother falling in love with a human thats risky and completely irrational, what do you think is gonna happen… what happened to staying loyal to the family… though our brother and sister seem to have no regards for what ever is happening between you and this girl… now your marrying her in a week… you need to get your head on straight…”

before klaus could finish Kol throws his brother to the ceiling and lets him fall before shouting at his brother…

Kol: “i love her… Nik i love her… i know your not entirely thrilled with whats happening… but this is how it will be, this is my choice, its my life not yours… just because you have fucked up your life, doesnt mean you get to control ours… you have driven almost every single guy out of our dear sisters life, Elijah doesnt even try cause he is too busy cleaning up after you and your antics… if someone in this family deserves to be happy, it should be me… whether you accept it or not this will happen and YN will be a vampire in a week and if you desire there will be a spot on the guest list just for you… my head is on straight Nik its you that needs to straighten out your head…”

klaus: “you are gonna have to also straighten out your head if you hope to go through with starting a life with this half wit bitch who needs a lesson in manner. or needs to learn whose in charge around here…”

Kol: “no she doesnt, cause we wont be answering to you. we will do what we want when we please and if you want to continue to remain in our lives more specifically in mine, you are gonna have to smarten up and stop trying to control everything and everyone around you… please Nik if you ever were serious about us being brothers then please stop being a class 1 jackass, get your head out of the 16th century and start living in the now… now if you dont mind im gonna go get a bottle of wine from my collection for me and my fiance to drink while we plan our fantastic wedding.”

Kol walks away leaving Klaus alone with his thoughts…  he went to find a nice merlot that would suit the rest of the evening alone that you both would share… he had hoped that when he went upstairs to find you that you and Bekah would be done your conversation…

———————

meanwhile, while Nik and Kol were having their little argument you and Rebekah were having a civilized woman to woman conversation…. going over what was in your brains for ideas for the wedding then this conversation took a sharp turn…

rebekah: “so how did you come to move to new orleans…”

You sat up and leaned your head against the pillow against the headrest as you began to answer.

YN: “i had to get out of my previous city… the person i was living with was abusive and just an over all class 1 jackass… he was not the best person to be roommates with at all… but one night i was sleeping and i woke with a fright as he was towering over me jerking off and he tried to rape me but i hit him over the head with a lamp and i went outside the room called the cops and waited for them to show up.., when they did they arrested him and let me grab a few of my essentials and brought me into protective custody… his hearing went against him he is now in jail and probably will never be let out… but anyway when i got put into protective custody the cops were very clear that i had to go as far away as possible they gave me cash to get far far far away from there and never look back so i went to the airport by police escort, booked a flight to the first place i thought of and ended up here with only my essential belongings… and a few new items.”

Rebekah gave you a hug and smiled… you both then hear humming echoing through the walls… 

Rebekah: “i suppose your wondering how the process of turning you into a vampire will go…”

YN: “kinda ya… i just want to know how it will go so i kinda know what to expect…”

Rebekah: “thats understandable… so the process may sound a bit disgusting but thats just the way things have been done for ages… so once you both are pronounced husband and wife, there will be a few photographs simple but elegent one with each of me nik and elijah several shots of you and Kol and then a family portrait… then during the reception you and Kol will get up to make the speech last, during the last part of the speech Kol will speak… he will then go through this process… in your wine he will have put several or more drops of his blood in there course thats to drown out half the taste… once he toasts you drink the entire glass then you both will breathe it in the excitement and new beginning still new and fresh in your minds. he will kiss you and upon breaking the kiss he will tell you he loves you then snap your neck there by killing you… within 8 hours after you will wake beside Kol who will present you with a blood bag which you will drink entirely maybe wanting another maybe not… but thats basically it from there its learning control and how to use all the tricks.” 

You laid back on the bed and kinda smiled at rebekah, as you both seemingly continued to bond getting along but before you could respond kol was standing in the doorway.

 Rebekah: “dear brother how long have you been standing there?”

Kol: “not long, just long enough to watch you too bonding…”

rebekah: “do you need anything else YN?”

You look at Kol whose just eyeing you up and down..

YN: “nah im good ill see you tomorrow bright and early ish for some head start wedding planning…”

Rebekah gives you a hug as she gets up and heads out the door closing it behind her. Kol takes off his jacket, kicks off his shoes and pours 2 glasses of wine, he hands one to you and both of you take several sips.

Kol: “i never thought ever that id be married in this lifetime or the next… or well any lifetime… im just happy to be starting the next chapter of my forever with an amazing lady such as you.”

 YN: “this move was not in my future at all at the beginning of the year, but now i feel like i can safely fade out of my old life and into my new one with you.”

 Kol takes your wine glass from you and places both yours and his on the nightstand, he then runs his hands over your forearm, tracing every inch of it as he lwans in closer to you..

 Kol: “tomorrow when we are with my sister and dear brother wedding shopping we will also introduce you your new home. Now let us fall into a kiss of lasting slumber till morning light breaks the sky.”

 The making out began while you changed into the shirt that kol gave you to wear for the night, and ended when you both fell asleep in eachothers embrace waking not only to morning light but also to the knocking that was happening on the door. 

 With groans from both of you and adjustments to the bedding, you both greeting the one who walked into the room. It was klaus. 

 Klaus: “ah fantastic your awake…” 

Kol: “we are now brother thank you… now i hope you have a very good reason for this cause we would like to get back to sleep…” 

Klaus: “just came to let you know that the french quarter is home to mardi gras and you know how things get and well also to say that i support this union if it means your happiness brother.”

Kol and you kinda sit up against the headboard as you both stare at klaus.. 

Kol: “are you being serious nik…”

 Klaus: “im being deadly serious. Besides brother i have my own news, i have found a venue for your wedding, a place thats special to our family a place where you both need to go before the reception is begun… brother its timd to show YN the place that only a few years ago you awoke from a coffin…" 

Kol: “eventually but right now we are quite content with being married here in new orleans.. especially during mardi gars. Now nik is that all?”

 Klaus: “yes ill let you both be and ill see you later.”

you and Kol take a few longing stares at eachother before curling back into eachothers arms again and falling back into a peaceful sleep. another several hours to pass before the streets of new orleans become lively enough that the noise catches both your ears. 

this prompts the both of you to get up from the bed and go to stand on the balcony. absolutely certain that it was the start of mardi gras. sure enough down below the streets full of people dressed in bright vicious looking colors and vibrant songs play. 

you and Kol start your day… this kept you busy well the wedding planning did… you learned a bit of the history behind the city and your fiance’s family involvement. you meet a few interesting people along the way. 

you then come to the night before the wedding. you and Kol had just finished going through the lists and making sure you had everything prepared and that the compound was ready for the events that would progress the next day. 

Kol: “attention family and honored friends. thank you all so much for helping us pull this together this past week has been insane and we appreciate everything you all have done. tomorrow we welcome a new Vampire into our little family. tomorrow i will turn my bride giving her a freash new start to life and the release from her past that she craves. i thank you all once more for the help in decorating, planning, and putting this entire event together. we are gonna be very happy together for all eternity. which is why i have a gift for my beautiful bride curtisy of Vincint. i had him make this at the beginning of the week… please say you will wear it always and forever.”

you are handed a small but rectangular box, you open it to reveal a daylight necklace. you smile as you nod your head. 

YN: “always and forever. Lapis lazuli very nice…”

Vincint: “that is your daylight necklace, it will allow you to continue to walk in the sunlight after you becime a vampire. This way Kol and the rsst of us xan continue to help you on your journey for all eternity wuthout that pesky problem of daylight. Congratulations to both of you… to the happy couple!”

 The congratulations and champange flowed, eventually you were taken away by rebekah and kol the same thing by klaus… you and rebekah prepared a couple things to make the getting ready process easier. 

Then you both lay your heads down to rest for the night knowing that the next day would bring happiness and family all in one shot. You closed your eyes excited for the events of the next day!

 The lights were strung high ready to sparkle and shimmer.

 The flowers were fake from the store cause you were very bad at gardening.

 The table cloths were already owned, and made in the 16th dentury… shit thats old.

 The dinner ware same thing old as shit but gold and shiny.

 Kols tux was well only a half tux so he has his navy vest, red dress shirt, and navy pants. And man was he ever gonna be handsome! 

Rebekahs dress was a wine red short dress with sparkles and beading on the bodice.

 Your dress was a sexy backless wine red short dress which you were certain would knock kols socks off.

 Klaus and elijah both wore navy tuxs and the ceremony would begin at 3pm.

your hair would be done last. the first priority was for you to put on a bikini and let rebekah help you get your hair washed and relax like any good mannered maid of honor should. 

Rebekah: “look i get it your nervous. but dont worry, being part of this family means we dont let any member walk alone at all. you will be an excellent vampire. now lean back and relax, we will have you looking sexy and hot for my dear brother in no time. now dont worry about a thing, you will be fine, everything will go as planned. now get into that bikini and get into the bath, ill come in when your ready and ill give you a shoulder massage as well as help you wash your hair. and we can talk about girl stuff and gab and all that fun stuff…”

YN: “thank you Rebekah. you being here with me today is actually a huge relief that i wont have to get myself ready for my own wedding. i didnt have any siblings that i know of nor any friends…. it was a very lonely time back home… now i am actually gonna live with people who i know will always be by my side so thank you for everything!”

Rebekah: “your selcome. now get into that bath before i vamp speed it upon you…”

you take the bikini and the towel going into the bathroom. it was amazing the decor and the view. you could still see and hear the festivities of the people below but you also were occupied with putting on the bikini and getting into the bath. 

first step in was warm, the water was warm, you were smiling as you sunk into the water. you let out a kind of loud sigh as you spoke…

YN: “its safe bekah, come on in girl.”

rebekah comes in and smiles as another lady walks in beside her… 

rebekah: “this is my sister freya. she just arrived from helping with a witch problem out of town. she came in to meet the newest member of the family.  but she is a witch. she helped pick the necklace with Kol for you.”

Freya: “hello YN, im freya. please allow me take away some of your nerves to better help you relax.”

you nod as rebekah comes up behind you to set up to wet down and wash your hair. Freya goes to grab some sage and burns the tip as she mutters a few words, you begin to feel alot more relaxed. 

you feel the stress and nervousness leave your body as Freya comes to put a touching coat of wine red Nail polish on your nails, your hands were for obvious reasons staying out of the water.

YN: “can we deal with my toes once im out of the bath?”

Freya: “of course, cause we can mosturize your feet as well to help with blisters and such too… not to worry girl, we got this. trust me i know how you feel bout my brother. im in that same boat with a lovely lady of my own… of course she wont be attending this ceremony she understands that this is a family matter.”

YN: “i need to get something off my chest…”

Freya mutters a few extra words.

Freya: “we can now speak freely ive sound proofed the room.”

YN: “i never thought in a million years i would ever get married, not to someone as wonderful as Kol. i just wish i hadnt spent all my life alone… for the entire time of my past relationship if you can call it that, i lived in constant fear of each day being my last cause he was an asshole whose idea of being roommates was a secret perverted lie, he told me he was gay and then he started ordering me around like i was his slave, then he had me dress slutty, then he had me dance for him and his drinking buddies. i cried myself to sleep almost every single night. i am just happy to have a future thats bright.”

Freya: “not to worry sis, we will make sure nothing ever happens to you again. now Rebekah go prepare the robe so she can wear it while we do her hair. and make sure the dress is not a pull on, i will finish with her.”

Freya helps you to relax a bit longer, by this point  1 hour had almost gone by, you were so relaxed and caught up in girl chat that you didnt realize what time it was. good thing it wouldnt take long to get you ready. 

Freya handed you a towel as she averted her eyes from you to allow you to wrap into the towel. it was an amzing thing you felt so relaxed. but you still had lots to prep before you could stand by and watch some of the festivities. 

of course with rebekah and Freya from the balcony that would be where you guys would sit drink champagne and listen to the music and deal with whatever comes your way. 

you and Freya walk out of the bathroom and into the bedroom, your mind begins to wander as you go behind the changing screen and put on your strapless bra and your lace panties. this would be your under garments for Kols viewing after everything. 

you come out in a undone robe and sexy lingerie, both Rebekah and Freya make oolalas and sexy eyes at you jokingly of course because they knew you never had any real friends or family before this so they just treated you like family right off the hop. 

Freya: “stylish.. kols gonna flip. now come sit in this chair sis, sideways so your feet are over the arm rest and your hair is easily accessable for rebekah… and try to relax again, just enjoy it enjoy your champagne and dainties. and dont worry your glass will just keep refilling itself. its enchanted!”

You did as instructed, you giggled with both of them, you felt good, you finally felt normal. 

{~*A/N we are almost done our epic tale, i think… we have but 3 more instances to get through. now we venture from freya, rebekah and YN being girls and happy to Kol Elijah and Klaus being men and making sure they forget to play nice entirely. Back to the story.*~}

meanwhile, while you and the ladies were have amazing conversation and excellent champagne. the guys however not so much, elijah was just sitting back while Kol and Klaus were well sparing but for them sparing was arguing in a form. 

Elijah: “niklaus dont hurt Kol he is the one getting hitched in a few hours.”

Klaus: “nah he will heal by then, just mind your own business elijah.”

Elijah: “fine Kol can i ask you some questions while you kick our brothers ass from here to kingdom come.”

Kol: “go for it elijah i will answer them best i can.”

Elijah: “do you want me to write your vows for you or are you just gonna tell me what to write for you?”

Kol: “ill talk you write…”

Elijah: “next question how do you like the ceremony layout?” 

Kol: “it was elegent and simple with the mikelson touch it is exactly how we wanted thank you brother.”

elijah watched as Kol now was charging head on for Klaus… this made elijah kind of flinch when the 2 of them collided. 

Elijah: “niklaus you need to behave for the sake of our family reputation be on your best behavior. in the name of our family do not ruin us niklaus. it will destroy this family. now if you boys will excuse me im gonna go check on the decorations i just got the text from the ladies that they are watching the festivities from the balcony. ill go and see our dear sisters in a moment after the decorations and the set up. i can not stress enough Niklaus do not mess this day up. or i will do something drestic..”

elijah leaves the scene already wearing his tux, looking sharp and spify he goes out to check on the decorations leaving the 2 guys truly alone.

Klaus: “are you sure you want to get married brother? to this human that you have not known long?”

Kol: “its love at first sight. i didnt compel her or anything i just knew. she was the one i wanted to spend my eternity happily with. now either come at me or ill make you regret it. and elijahs right ill even let him do the honors if you wreck my wedding. now go get ready nik… ceremony starts in a few hours and we have male portraits to take…”

Klaus doesnt say anything but instead scowls at his brother before smirking and walks out of the room and back to his so he can get ready. Kol heads back to his room, he gets ready and goes to stand close to the balcony so he can hear your sweet voice.

he then gets a text from you the conversaton though short and sweet went like this: 

this made Kol smile he went on his way to the photos with a huge smile crossing his features. while you were sitting with the girls swooning over the chat. it wasnt vocal or face to face but you could hear his voice say every single word.

the girls were not shy to this heroic deed either. this was how you were beginnined your newest journey through life. this is how you are starting over. this is how your life was gonna be. you were getting married this very day!

you put on your dress and had just finished zipping it up when Elijah knocked on the door. you freya and rebekah turned towards the door to see elijah enter.

Elijah: “all 3 of you ladies look spectacular. but the bride looks absolutely radiant. everything decoration wise is in order, the food for the receptin is being prepared, the place settings are laid out as per your specifications and you are gonna love how dashing the groom looks. he is as radiant as you are sister in law. Freya its a pleasure to see you again, i trust it went well with the witches. rebekah stunning as always. niklaus is in a mood, be warned ladies both Kol and myself have threatned to take drastic action against him should he do anything to disrupt yours and Kols wedding. we will start in 10 minutes.”

You stand to approach elijah…

YN: “thank you for doing everything for this wedding to go off without any issues. elijah i am truly honored to call you brother. now you should go and please tell Kol that i love him.”

Elijah: “of course sister. ill see everyone down in a few moments. places.”

you suddenly were torn away from the sight of the door closing by the aroma of sour puss shots. you freya and rebekah went out onto the balcony overloooking the inside of the compound where you couldnt be seen to listen to the start of the ceremony.

Elijah: “if you will all take your seats we will begin the ceremony immediately.”

everyone sat down, elijah continued.

Elijah: “welcome ladies, gentlemen and honored guests. today it is my highest honor to officiate the wedding of my dear brother Kol and his lady YN. they found their happiness in eachother so today we join our hearts with their own as they join their lives forever. everyone please rise and turn for the approach of the bridal party.”

that was when you freya and rebekah took the shots. you were all smiling as rebekah went down first, then freya went down about 10 seconds after, then elijah spoke again.

Elijah: “now if you all will have your gaze continual fixed on the stairs its time to greet the bride, this is the first glance between the bride and the groom as well for they have not seen one another for 24 hours now. here comes the bride!”

you from behind the pillar and into everyone’s view, no one looked shocked except for Kol. his reaction was one you had asked the photographer specifically to catch. so you could hold it over his head for all eternity. 

Freya had waited at the bottom of the stairs so she could walk with you the rest of the way down the aisle. the second you locked eyes with Kol coming off the stairs both of you were smiling, neither of you could think straight. 

seeing kol standing there looking so handsome in his suit made your knees go weak cause in your eyes he was moi caliente.

kol kept his cool but he wanted to take you right then right there in the middle of the aisle because in his eyes you were sexy beyond compare.

reaching the end of the aisle freya placed your hands in Kols, you handed your  bouquet to rebekah and then nodded at Elijah to continue the ceremony.

Elijah: “My name is Elijah Mikelson it is my highest privilage and honor to preside over this ceremony that shall unite Kol and Yn. should anyone object to this union let them speak now or for eternity let them stay silent.”

no one spoke from the crowd. the surroundings were glimmering, but you and Kol were lost entirely in eachothers gaze.

Elijah: “very well, i understand from the couple that they have prepared their own vows. starting with Yn you may now recite your vows.”

you grip Kols hands in your own as you take a nice deep breath.

YN: “Kol, you changed my life. you spoke one word to me and that was it your accent had me hooked. i fell instantly for you. i stand here today to declare that from now and forever i shall be yours wholy and willingly. yours and yours alone. your the reason why i can have a normal life. your the reason why i can finally feel free from my old life. today i die to be resurrected into this new eternity of firsts with you! i love you Kol Always and Forever!”

Elijah smiled slightly as he spoke once more.

elijah: “Kol dear brother its your turn.”

Kol too took a breath.

Kol: “YN, my darling my light. i feel like ive known you forever. i love your laugh, your smile, your eyes the way they sparkle. i love everything about you. it takes alot of courage to propose marriage but it takes greater courage to say that you want to die and be resurrected into a life that your unfamiliar with for the rest of eternity to be with someone. many of us didnt have a choice, most of us became what we are by force not out of our own free will. Yn made the choice out of her own free will cause she came to New Orleans looking for a fresh start. the choice she made was to be with me and stand by my side for eternity. today i turn you to be like me and in doing so bring you into your new life as your husband above all else Always and Forever will i love you evermore!”

Elijah: “now if Rebekah will give Yn Kols wedding ring its time to exchange the rings.”

Rebekah hands you the ring as Elijah clears his throat to speak again.

Elijah: “say the declaration of love that you were given to speak during this part. this will be your affirmation to everyone here including yourself and Kol that you are ready to become what we are for all eternity. then Kol say the reply and place your ring directly after.”

You slowly start to slide the ring on Kols finger as you begin to speak.

YN: “I YN declare this day to now and forevermore forsake my mortality and exchange it for the thrills of marriage and immortality. Kol i vow to love, honor, cherish and be faithful to you forsaking my mortality and old life always and forever.”

Kol take the ring from Klaus as Elijah cleared his throat as Kol began to speak.

Kol: “i Kol accept your declaration and this day declare that those who dare try to harm or commit treason against my bride shall be executed at the hands of the Mikelsons. from this day and into eternity i Kol vow to love, to cherish, honor, be faithful and protect you forsaking all others for eternity and into forever. i love you Yn Always and Forever.” 

Elijah straighten up and smiled now ready to speak again.

Elijah: “by the power vested in me by the laws of New Orleans i by my highest honor pronounce you Husband and Wife. Kol you may kiss your bride!”

Kol’s hands leave your own to one arm hold you by the waist, the other with your free arm as well fist bumping the air as he Kisses you passionately. surely the photographer caught that absolutely beautiful moment.

you and Kol joined hands breaking the kiss and the crowd applauded louder and louder their applause was turned round by Klaus speaking.

Klaus: “3 cheers for the happy couple…”

the crowd roared at those words. but neither you nor kol cared you both were just happy that this day so far had gone off without a hitch. you were whisked away from the crowd for a few moments alone with your husband. you both went into one of the small rooms upstairs to be alone.

Kol: “finally i get you all to myself for a while.”

YN: “i guess you dont do large parties often.”

Kol: “not often, not since our mother passed. she was the one who threw the parties, i only went to please her. did that really just happen? did i just get married to the most gorgeous woman ive ever met?”

YN: “that depends if it was a dream dont you think we would have woken up by now?”

Kol just laughed as he stood and held his hand out to you.

Kol: “i want to show you something… this is something i had done up for the woman who i would eventually end up with.”

Kol goes to the desk and pulls out a box, the appearance of the box was petite and black with no logos or anything. he comes back to stand beside you he hands you the box.

Kol: “happy wedding day darling!”

you stare at the box for a few moments before opening it. this revealed the mikelson family crest on a bracelet… similar to Kols but more you!

YN: “Kol its beautiful dear thank you! now i have a gift for you but it was kinda hard to decide what to get you, so i had vincint enchant this item with a locator spell, so no matter what life brings us cause i know the family probably have enemies who will at some point or another possibly come after us and i cant loose you so here…”

you go to the corner by the bed and you pull out a small box. you handed it to Kol, you then watched him open it to reveal a set of dog tags. 

Kol: “its beautiful babe! now lets go comence the reception. and bring you into your new life.”

those words said and the 2 of you walked back to the top of the stairs awaiting the announcement. 

Elijah: "ladies and gentlemen may i present to you for the first time Kol and Yn Mikelson!”

you and Kol step out on the stairs, going down you both greet the guests. then you both greet the siblings.

Freya: “you both were absolutely graceful up there.”

Rebekah: “we have another sister, yes!!!!! we will do everything girly when your changed Yn we will show you the best time.”

Elijah: “i hope that you both will enjoy this new found life together. YN im honored to call you now my sister.”

Klaus: “well this party is successfully dull when do we eat.”

Elijah: “niklaus, dont be impatient you must wait for the cooks to be finished what they are doing.”

Klaus: “fine brother if you need me ill be at the bar drinking the stock.”

you and Kol decided to enjoy the cocktail hour with the siblings minus Klaus, then you decide to give elijah the signal once Dinner trays start being put on tables. 

Buffet style dinner, the first dance a tango of sorts something Kol had picked up it was so romantic, a few more photographs, then it was time for speeches, first rebekah, then klaus, then elijah and finally Kol (speaking for you and him).

Kol: “first of all, me and my beautiful bride wish to thank each and every one of you for being here tonight to celebrate with us. second i have a few more thank yous to give. first to my brother Elijah thank you brother for being here today and being ready to perform this ceremony. we are so grateful. second to my sisters Freya and Rebekah, thank you both of you for helping my beautiful bride and accepting this choice, and being here to share in this day. we love you both. third to my brother Nik, who fought back his urges to ruin what is the happiest day of my eternity, thank you for being here today brother i know we have alot of unresolved anger to work on but i know we will resolve it in due time. forth to Vincint whose enchantments helped me and my beautiful bride have wonderful gifts for eachother for this glorious occassion. thank you my friend, we look forward to many more dinners and drinks with you my dear friend. and finally to my bride, YN you changed my life, now with this goblet i change yours. inside it you wont taste anything off but when we toast you have to drink your entire goblet. thats why its only at half. now as you step out of this life and into your eternity with me i promise you wont feel a thing but you will be quarantined with me for a few days after before i take you on the proper honeymoon you deserve. toast to my family.”

everyone began to toast Kol and you turned to face eachother. clinking your goblets, you chug your entire glass then look up at your husband who kisses you but as he breaks the kiss he snaps your neck. you fall limp in his arms. 

Kol then carries you bridal style into your now shared bedroom, knowing he had to stay by your side till you awaken, he had prepared everything, he had bloodbags, he had a change of clothes, he had thought of everything he could possibly think of.

 Kol took off his shoes, your shoes and his coat before he lay beside you knowing that in a few hours yiu would wake. he hoped that you would not spiral if he was the first person you saw coming out of stasis.

Kol (to your still form): “i pray you will see the good out of this after you wake. i love you and ill be right here when you wake up.”

kol faced you and shut his eyes reminiscing on the events that took place that very day. Several hours later he could hear the pulsingnblood through your body awakening, he could feel your fingers beginning to move, intently he watched your form. A few moments later you woke up.

the light hurt to look at, the way your gums hurt, everything all at once made you sit straight up. Kol was in front of you in moments. 

Kol: “hey love, hey its okay. your gonna be okay. what do you remember?”

YN: “i remember our wedding, the reception, the stolen moment after photos, the dance, the toast, the goblet. drinking it and now waking up here with you. did it work? am i?”

Kol: “here drink this do what i do ill drink some with you. but you need this so your gums stop hurting and so your aversion to sunlight subsides. if you do what i do and just keep your gaze on me you will be fine and the transition will be complete.”

Kol hands you a blood bag from the pile he has just put on the bed and he sits in front of you. he takes the tube and uses it like a straw you do the same thing, the pain subsiding as soon as the blood touched your lips.

you went through 10 blood bags before Kol finally got up and put the pile in the garbage.

Kol: “how do you feel now love?”

YN: “no more pain, i feel fantastic. hows the family?”

Kol: “why dont you ask them yourself.”

at that moment the door to your room is opened to reveal Freya, rebekah and Elijah. Freya and Rebekah approach you first pulling you into a 3 way girl hug. this was the one embrace you had been looking forward to.

then you stood as Elijah approached.

Elijah: “how do you feel sister?”

YN: “i feel good, actually Kol said i am doing better than expected. but still wants to keep me here.”

Elijah: “fair enough but from what im seeing you are progressing beautifully. dont stress too much about your progress. niklaus regrets he couldnt be here but he had business to attend to in the south quarter. some witches wanted to speak with him.”

you looked at Kol who nodded to rebekah and freya.

Freya: “come with us sister we are gonna let you see your closet. we are also gonna help you move it into this room but we want you to see it first.”

you go with them, elijah and Kol follow... 

-you discover your new wardrobe.

-Kol and Elijah as well as your sisters now help you to transfer your new wardrobe into your room.

-Klaus returns to the compound with a young girl who he had had an affair with back in Mystic Falls a while ago but just found out is pregnant somehow with his child. 

- you learn how to speed safely, you learn how to use compulsion, you leanr how to use your strength without killing anyone with a hug or a hand shake as well as how to control your blood lust. 

you are standing in yours and Kols room on the balcony in one of the silk sheets you both had recieved as a wedding present after a shower. Kol comes up behind you wraping his arms around your waist from behind.

Kol: “what are you doing out here in that sheet?”

YN: “just admiring this beautfiul city. listening to the calm. seeing the bstle of the night life coming together.”

Kol: “how bout you come to bed so we can properly consumnate our marriage?”

You follow Kol to bed and that was that. you both in a frenzy concummated the marriage and smiled lots.

[somethingisnewunderthesun]

Swift

You could of loved me all my life if I hadn't left you waiting in the cold, I can tell you that Im sorry but you wont believe me baby like you did before.

The stakes were high, the water was rough. But That Love was Ours.

All this time, I never learned to read your mind, I couldn't turn things around, you never gave a warning sign/ you gave sooo many signs.

Ill take your hand and drag you head first, fearless. 

Hey Stephen, why are people always leaving? I think you and I should stay the same.

And I flashback to when we said, Forever & Always.

This is where the feeling sinks in, I dont wanna miss you like this. Come back. Be here. Come Back. Be Here.

You took the time to memorize me, my fears, my hopes and dreams. All those times you didnt leave its been occurring to Id like to hang out with you, for my whole life. I think that its best if we both Stay.

This is me swallowing my pride standing in front of you saying Im sorry for that night. Turns out freedom aint nothing but missing you, wishing i realized what I had when you were mine. If we loved again I swear id love you right. Id go back in time and change it but I cant, so if the chain is on your door, I understand.

Tell myself Its time now, gotta let go, but moving on from her is impossible when I still see it all in my head, Burning Red. Losing her was Blue like I’ve never known. Missing her was Dark Gray all alone. Forgetting her was like trying to know somebody you never met. But loving her was Red.

She cant see the smile Im faking, and my hearts not breaking, cause im not feeling anything at all. And you were wild and crazy, just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated. Got away by some mistake and now. I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain, Its 2am and Im cursing your name, Im so in love that I acted Insane, and thats the way I loved you. Breaking Down and coming undone its a roller coaster kinda rush.

Your sick & tired of my attitude, your feeling like you don’t know me, I tell you that I love you then cut you down. And you need me like a heartbeat, but you know I got a meanstreak, makes you run for cover when I’m around. And hears to me and my temper. You knew that you saw what I was doing to you. Ill tell you why. (Cause I was a fucking clown.)  I could write a book on, how to ruin someone perfect.

Simple complication, miscommunication leads to fall out. Ive never heard silence quite this loud. The story of us looks alot like a tragedy now.

And I feel you forget me like I used to feel you Breathe. Hope Its nice where you are. And I hope the sun shines, and its a beautiful day, and something reminds you youd wished you had stayed. You can plan for a change in the weather and time, but I never planned on you changing your mind.

Marry me Juliet you'll never have to be alone. I Love You and thats all I really know. Ill be the price, and you be the princess. Its a Love story baby just say yes.

And Time, is taking its sweet time erasing you. Cause we had, a beautiful, magic love there. What a sad, beautiful, tragic, love affair. Distance, timing, breakdown, fighting, silence, the train runs off its tracks. Kiss me, try to fix it. Could you just try to listen?? Hang up, give up. For the Life of us we cant get back.

All i am is mean, and a liar, and pathetic, and alone in life, and mean, and mean , and mean, and mean. Ill im ever gonna be is mean. 

Cause I see sparks fly whenever you smile.

3 years gone and Im still reaching even though I know you’re not there. I was playing back a thousand memories baby, thinking bout everything we’ve been through. Maybe ive been going back too much lately when time stood still, and I had you. I flashback to the night when you said you said to me nothings gonna change, not for me & you. Not before I knew how much I had to lose. If your out there, if your somewhere, if your moving on, Ive been waiting for you ever since youve been gone. I just want it back to the way it was before, and I just wanna see you back at my front door. I know that we could work it out somehow, but if this was a movie youd be here by now.

You were a dreamer before I ever let you down. Now here I am on my knees, begging for forgiveness, begging for you. Just like you always wanted. Cause your not my princess. Your gonna find someone someday that might actually treat you well, and its to late for me and my white horse to catch you now.

But we were something dont you think so, and if my wishes came true, it would of been you, persist and resit the temptation to ask you if one thing had been different, would everything be different today? And it would of been sweet, if it coulda been me. But it woulda been fun, if you woulda been the one.

Maybe we got lost in translation, maybe you asked for too much, and maybe this thing was a masterpiece before I tore it all up, but I keep your old hoodie from that very 1st week, cause it reminds me of innocence, and it smells like you. Cause there we are again when I loved you so, back before I lost the one real thing Ive ever known, wind in your hair, i was there i remember it all, down the stairs I was there, I remember it all, It was rare, I was there, I remember it All to well. 

He’ll never know your story like I do. Im dreaming bout the day when you wake up and find that what your looking for has been here the whole time. You say your fine, know you better than that, hey what cha doing with a boy like that?      Cant you see that Im the one who understands you, been here all along so why cant you see, you belong with me.

[sirpibbles-blog]

Quick personal update

It doesn’t have anything to do with the blog so feel free to skip!~

So regarding my whole stalker story! I think I should explain it a bit more for those who are interested. I mean, if anything good comes out of this, it should at least be a story~

Quick background info!: I’m the only girl in an apprentice carpentry class. I’m a fucking tiny (less than 5ft) lil thing. And in that class, a heavy majority of the guys there are neckbeards without the neckbeards. ( If that even makes any sense) And it would be perfectly fine if they were just recluses, minding their own buisiness-type of neckbeards but they aren’t. They’re incels. I catch them speaking their weird sexist, stupid rhetoric all too often. Most just avoid me, which I’m perfectly okay about, but a few like to “show off??” in front of me if you can really call it that. It’s weird and hard to describe, but I think that’s just how incels are.

Anyway!~ that brings us to one in particularly adamant neckbeard named Elijah. At first I thought nothing of him. It’s a class where I’m constantly focused and covered in sawdust. But I’m a friendly person! (or at least I try to be) So on breaks I would talk to some of the dudes and he happened to pick up a few things from our conversations. I would talk about games I played, music, hobbies, ect. (Basically normal generic stuff) And after a few days he would approach me and talk about his own interests which were similar to mine. Although.. who doesn’t like videogames and music…? 

Elijah would tell me that I was some rare gem of a girl, (#notlikeothergirls bullshit). Even though I make my personality especially bland around the people in that class on purpose. So time passes and he gets more and more “close” to me. (by that I mean literally physically gets closer. Like ill be minding my own business, only to be towered on by this dude just watching me)

And he starts getting weird. Like.. you know those kids in elementary school who would want everyone’s attention so they act out by shaking back and forth or holding their head in their hands and hitting themselves? Normally If someone did this I would think that maybe they had a rough day and just needed space.. like most people do. But any time some one would confront him he would tell them to go away, only talking to me. One time I asked him what was wrong and he replied with something along the lines of “I was thinking about you, and about our relationship”. 

SO PRETTY FREAKY.

The next few days he would bring me flowers, jewelry, and arrive to class a half hour early every day to wait for me so he could open the door for me and walk me inside. It seemed really predatory. I love when people are polite and open doors for others, but he gave off serious vibes.

And that leads us to Friday… where he gave me a letter…

Its a heavily doused in cologne, white envelope with the words “TO: Ms. Gorgous (yes he spelled it wrong) FROM: Your Soulmate”.

I took a picture of the note but my camera is really bad and his handwriting is super messy so I’ll type it out too.

oh yeah my name is Emma but I honestly don’t care if you all know that, I mean.. It’s one of the most common names in the world. Anyways~

“Dear Emma, I love you unconditionally. So that means no matter what you become, or believe in I’ll love you for who you are. I want to fulfill all of your hearts desire. Whatever that may be. My main focus is your happyness being full no matter what life brings. Ever since I first talked to you I felt familiar to me. Like I knew you from another life. I need my last breath to be in your arms looking into those sparkling eyes and gracious smile. Whether you take me into your heart and soul as your lover or not I will always love you Emma until the end of time and beyond.” 

“PS. The necklace was made for the one person I love more than anything in the universe you. Also listen to the following songs: How would you feel, I wont give up on us, and I wanna grow old with you, photagraph by Ed Sheeran. I love you beyond words can explain Emma. Just you and me til the end of time.”

The letter smells like a mix between really cheap cologne and grandma’s house. I’m super smell sensitive so every time I open it, I gag.

Keep in mind I’ve only talked to this man about 8 times at most. Very brief talks about generic subjects. And all those typos he made I left in so you could get a real feel for it.

I’m a writer and I can’t make this shit up.

I’m gonna talk to him Monday. There’s no doubt in my mind that he’ll be waiting for me in front of the entrance, just waiting for my reaction. I honestly hope he takes it well. 

Wish me luck!

(Oh and I forgot to mention, he told me one of his favorite hobbies was to dissect frogs and rodents in his basement. He talked about like.. Frankenstein and bringing shit back to life, Idk. I just thought it was a defining character trait you guys might want to know)

[detectivehole]

Go comic feral, i followed this blog for a rEASOn and it's bc i like to hear your random vents and rants and also you reblog cool stuff. But i digress, go comic feral i am hERE for it

fine

PETER PARKER BEING RICH IS STUPID  he didnt even ern what he has himself it was nt even himn he wasnt in his body maybe if i had got to see him start fron nothing to being a cool ceo or whatever id be able to stand it but nooooooo he just GOT is for nothing so it feels stupid like “ha ha what if like tony stark haha” its DUMB and i haven’t read a spider man comic for a long time

deadpool/spiderman crossover comic bad. feels out of character a lot. funny concept and full of funny jokes but as far as characterization its bad in my opinion- was made to capitalize off the hype of the ship and we all know it

don cates should be banned from writing comics bc he fucking sucks and ill never forgive him for what he did/tried to do to venom

deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good dea

the venom movie was a lot of fun but it was very ooc a lot HOWEVER seeing some of the cut scenes and scripts you can see that it used to be actually fairly in character for the comics but a lot of scenes with eddie establishing himself as not actually the most nicest of guys (not that eddie isnt a nice guy deep down but he is a good amount fucked up with a big ol hero complex and a problem with ‘i can do no wrong” mentality sometimes) were cut and considering how the fandom for the movie treats him i can see why the cut those bits out bc i dont think movie goers would have liked him as much wich is a shame bc he is a good guy at the end of the day just fucked up

straight white male comic fans are the worst people in the world and breaking their fingers is a daydream i indulge in 

matt murdock is a himbo

foggy nelson is a good man who deserves better friends

i can tell what deadpool comics someone has read based on how they characterize wade in their fan works and i have a 80% success rate with it. the most common was the daniel way run but now its the spider-man/deadpool crossover series

soulda used miles for the mcu spidey instead of cannibalizing his story for parts like they did. dick move, Disney

mcu bad

i think just the idea of dc’s Red Tool is fucking hilarious but i dont like his character at all

batman and superman should fuck but they wont :/

matt and foggy should to but the comic industry is afraid of making long running characters lgbt bc theyre WEAK

deadpool need a canon bf they cant keep telling us hes pan and not showing us for reals- hell he could just go on one date or be shown having a one night stand or something- something beyond a damn joke

cable gay. no i will not listen to any other opinions.

im excited to read moon knight i have a book waiting i just have to finish my current one

SCUD the disposable assassin is the most underrated comic EVER and i LOVE IT however i think it ended stupid and bad however it went on fucking hiatus for like a decade and then was rapped up really fast so any ending is a godsend

i desperately want a long-form stand alone series abt wanda wilson bc shes the perfect foil for a good Feral Dumbass Woman comic. think abt it; shell sell immediately bc of recognizable brand, and then she can just go on violent stupid adventures without any of the other dp corps. it doenst have to line up with any canon i just want insane lady dp adventure comic. this is an unreasonable dream but mine none the less

i though that agent venom was stupid

tank girl is fucking amazing and i love it i never understand whats going on and i enjoy the confusion

reading early hulk comics feels like watching a weird, poorly produced old black and white sci-fi soap

there needs to be better, more easily accessed, official reading-order guides published and posted on the walls of comic shops everywhere

the 80s and 90s were the best time for marvel comics and no one can tell me otherwise. that was peak comic time

the worst time for comics was the 2000s and early 2010s

sometimes i am shocked by the art that gets the editors pass in comics. some of it is so bad and im not even talking about the disproportionate ladies

the lego marvel and dc movies are way better than the live action movies and im not even being sarcastic

seriously the 2000s made some horrible comics

i feel like committing acts of mass violence every time someone says comics arnt real reading/stories/implies theyre worth less of any value than a novel

i read the first deadpool comic i got so much that the art itself is so ingrained in my mind that people have shown my just the corners of panels and ive identified them correctly

i distinctly remember the first time the woman at the book store stopped asking me for parental permission to buy the comics i was getting (12yos) because i went there so often that she just remembered who i was and that the adult would say its fine

i refuse to talk about comics with people at cons because i am gatekept or flirted with every single time no matter what and there is no in between. and yea its because i have tits. youd think that eventually theyd learn but gross comic men never do and all the others have adopted the same policy as me so the closest i come to positive comic interaction at cons is standing in the same vicinity as another chick, looking at the same section, and the kinda smiling at each other

i think the avengers are boring. really really boring. the x-men are way better

i related to gwenpool too much when she first started and it scared/offended me so i stopped reading for a while until her character developed more and we stooped being so similar

i have spider-man bedding. i picked it out only a few months ago. its good it makes me feel cool in a very uncool way

watching spider-man as a kid made me wanna be a scientist. watching batman as a kid made me want to do martial arts. i ended up failing chemistry and falling on my face a lot instead.

i had a huge venom toy and a huge spiderman toy as a kid and while i did make them fight a lot i also made them hug just as much. i wanted them to be friends

on that note PETER IS MEAN TO THE SYMBIOTE NOW AND HE DONT EVEN HAVE A REASON NO MORE hes just such a dick about criminal reform eddie and the symbiote aint special with this- he says he believes people can be better but he really doesnt show it. he tends to think people are set in their ways and while this makes sense forthe most part considering how much hewas bullied as a kid/adult (that also contributes to his mild “i protect my own” mentality  tho at least he consciously fights that one) it stil pisses me off

i can think way more but i need to sleep i think

[wistfulcynic]

Another Brick In The Wall: Chapter 8

a/n: Effusive thanks to @hollyethecurious for the artwork! I love it so much! Thanks also to everyone for reading, commenting, kudos-ing, and reblogging! I'm so pleased by the way people have been engaging with this story. Love you all xxx

Summary: Emma Swan, sheriff’s daughter, mayor’s niece, quarterback’s girlfriend, is the undisputed princess of Storybrooke High. She is smart and confident and used to getting what she wants. What she wants is Killian Jones, the new boy in school. But Killian is not easily manipulated, and reluctant to allow the dark secrets in his past to touch the girl he is rapidly falling in love with.

Rating: T

Read it on AO3: Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8

Tags for: @darkcolinodonorgasm @jennjenn615 and @resident-of-storybrooke

Chapter 8: 

Killian was out of school for a week, for a “mental health break” he called it with a chuckle, apparently a term he’d gotten from Dr Hopper. He saw the psychiatrist daily during this break and spent the rest of his time at the harbour with Liam, working on their boat, reading, playing his guitar, and talking with his brother about everything that had happened. 

“We’ve hashed it all out in excruciating detail,” he told Emma as they sat together in the boat’s cabin, she working on her college essays while he practiced a new song. “It’s such a relief to be able to really talk to Liam again. There was a time when we had no secrets between us. He showed me all the information he had collected on Milah and her situation. Apparently her divorce is almost finalised and next month she’s starting a job teaching English in Japan.” He smiled. “She’ll like that, a chance to travel. What she always wanted.” 

“Hmmmph,” said Emma, glaring at the screen of her laptop as she typed rapidly. 

“Swan,” he admonished, giving her a mock scowl as he strummed a chord at her. 

Emma slammed her hands down on the keyboard. “Killian, I just don’t know how you can be so forgiving after what she did to you.” 

He set the guitar aside and his expression became serious. “I have to be, don’t you see?” he asked, looking at her intently. “I can’t hold on to my anger or it will eat me alive. I didn’t even realise how angry I was until Dr Hopper helped me see it, and how by not acknowledging it, allowing myself to feel it, and then letting it go, I was only hurting myself. Besides, I did genuinely care about Milah, and I’m glad she’s finally in a place where she can be happy.” 

“Hmmmmph.” Emma concentrated on deleting the gibberish she’d produced by her attack on the keyboard.

“A place that doesn’t include me,” said Killian brightly, picking up the guitar again and plucking out a cheery tune. “That’s good, isn’t it Swan?”

“I suppose so,” she grumbled. “Though I’d still prefer if the place was dark and scary and full of nettles.” He laughed heartily at that and she couldn’t hold back an answering smile. “Hey, I’m nearly done with this, will you read it over and make sure it’s okay? Just check my grammar and punctuation and stuff.”

“Of course, love, though I’m sure it’s already brilliant.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Freed from the weight of his worry and guilt, Killian gradually began to smile more easily, and his witty, teasing nature (“cheeky git,” Liam called him, his voice irritated but with a relief so profound it bordered on joy in his eyes) came more readily to the fore. When he returned to school the following Monday, he moved through the halls with a swagger that Emma had never seen on him before. Unlike the arrogant, bullying one that Neal always had Killian’s evoked a simple self-assurance that she had to concede looked really good on him. Despite how much emotional baggage he still had to work through he clearly wasn’t burdened by shame anymore, and equally clearly did not intend to take any crap from anyone. 

This made itself evident that morning when he shut his locker and turned towards his first class, only to find himself confronted by Felix and Rufio. 

“Really, chaps?” he said, raising an eyebrow at them. “You couldn’t even wait until after school so you could chuck me into the bins, like proper high school bullies?”

This mockery went clean over the other boys’ heads, and they continued to block his path, trying to look intimidating while also trying not to be intimidated by Killian’s calm demeanor and his amused expression. 

Felix, the sligtly cleverer of the two, suspected he was being laughed at but couldn’t put his finger on why. He didn’t like it. 

Bristling, he sneered at Killian. “Bet you think you’ve won,” he snarled. “Now that Neal’s in jail and out of the way. Now you can move in on Emma like you did on that—” he broke off as Killian stepped into his space. There wasn’t much difference in height between them, but somehow Felix had the impression of Killian towering over him, his face calm but his eyes darkly furious, and for once in his life he felt a stab of genuine fear. 

“I’m only going to say this once,” growled Killian in the new, lower register his voice had taken on more often of late, “So you’d better listen carefully. Your mate Neal is a criminal, and not even a good one. He’s in jail because he’s stupid, and that’s nothing to do with me. I have no doubt it’s where he’d always have ended up eventually. Bit of advice: If you’re going to steal confidential information, don’t take pictures of the evidence on your phone, and definitely don’t then show those pictures to the sheriff’s daughter. Neal got what he deserved. I now consider this matter closed, and if you or anyone else—” he raised his voice so that the rapidly assmbling crowd of onlookers could all hear, “—tries to take it any further, you will not care for the repercussions.” 

Felix wasn’t sure what “repercussions” were, but the hint of repressed violence in Killian’s manner made him keen not to find out. He had always been content to follow Neal, less out of respect for the other boy than a simple unwillingness to make a thing out of Neal’s belligerent insistence that he should be the one in charge, but he’d always sensed that there wasn’t much substance underneath Neal’s bluster. Killian however didn’t bluster. He simply stated facts, and Felix could tell that he was not the sort of person to make a threat he couldn’t back up with action. Perhaps it was time to step out of Neal’s shadow, thought Felix, and take over leadership of their little gang. He certainly couldn’t do a worse job of it than Neal had, and escalating a pointless conflict with a guy who looked prepared to fight dirty if necessary was much more Neal’s style than Felix’s. He nodded at Killian, and stepped back. Rufio looked surprised but followed his lead. 

Killian nodded back then transferred his glare to the crowd of onlookers, which had grown considerably in the past thirty seconds and now included Emma and Ruby, he could see out of the corner of his eye. “As for what you may have heard about me,” he said, loudly enough for all to hear. “It’s all true.” He smirked for a moment as a gasp went through the crowd, then his expression hardened. “It’s also no one’s business but mine, and those in whom I choose to confide. This is all I have to say on the subject. Now, if you’ll all excuse me I don’t wish to be late for class.” He slung his satchel over his shoulder and headed down the hall, turning his head briefly to shoot Emma a wink. People moved aside to let him pass and as soon as he had turned the corner furious whispering erupted in his wake. 

Ruby pursed her lips. “I may have underestimated him,” she remarked. 

Emma’s heart was pounding, a familiar occurrence where Killian was concerned, but this time it felt different. She’d been worried about how he would react to the ineveitable curiosity and questions from their classmates, but this smooth handling of a potentially explosive situation instead of calming her fears instead filled her with the wild desire to run after him, to fling herself into his arms and kiss them both breathless. 

“He’s just so wonderful,” she sighed, and Ruby laughed. 

“Down, girl,” she teased. “I’ll grant you this one’s worth your time, unlike the douchemaster general, but remember we’re in school. No one wants to see that.” 

Emma rolled her eyes and gave her friend a shove, but the butterflies continued rhumba-ing around her insides, this time accompanied by an odd, hollow sort of ache as she remembered her resolution not to pursue Killian anymore. She was now all but certain that she loved him, that beyond the hot, tingly sensation she always felt in his presence lay a profound devotion. She would do anything for him, sacrifice anything to give him what he needed, and that terrified her. For the first time in her life Emma felt vulnerable, exposed, as though her chest were torn open and her heart lain bare to the mercies of fate and one gorgeous, troubled boy. She hated it. Even knowing that Killian would never intentionally hurt her was no consolation when the truth was that he could hurt her simply by caring deeply for her as a friend. If that was all she could ever have from him she would take it, she knew, without pushing for more, but it would be a wound on her heart that would never heal. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“He’s a bully,” shrugged Killian at lunchtime, when Emma, this time accompanied by a very inquisitive Ruby, found him in the library. “Bullies are just cowards at their core, and cowards are easy to intimidate. He won’t do anything because he won’t want to call my bluff. I might not be able to back it up but he’ll be too scared to risk finding out.” 

“And what would you have done if he had called your bluff?” inquired Ruby. 

Killian shrugged again. “Probably got the shit kicked out of me.” 

“Would you have, though?” Ruby pressed, watching him through narrowed eyes.

He returned her stare with a look of wide-eyed innocence. “There were two of them to only one of me. Seems inevitable.” 

“Does it?” Ruby’s disbelief was almost palpable, and having fenced with Killian for months now Emma shared her friend’s suspicion that he was deliberately underplaying his fighting skills.

“Let’s hope we never have to find out,” said Killian with a small smile, in a tone of voice that made it clear he would answer no more questions on the subject. “I quite like my face arranged the way it is.” 

“It is a nice face,” said Ruby with a wolfish grin that widened as Killian’s ears turned pink. “But I didn’t come here just to flatter you. Victor asked me to ask you if he could have your phone number.”

“My number?” Killian blinked in surprise. 

“Yeah, there’s some concert in Portland and he doesn’t have anyone to go with and he thought you might be interested.” 

“Um, sure, I guess.” Killian rattled off the number and Ruby sent Victor a text. A minute later his phone buzzed and he looked at it, snorting as he read the message. “Bit of a wanker, your boyfriend,” he remarked to Ruby. 

“I don’t know what that is but I’m somehow sure that Victor is one,” smirked Ruby. “Is that gonna be a problem?”

“Not at all, I’m rather fond of wankers,” said Killian absently as he typed his reply. “My brother is one, after all.” His phone buzzed again almost instantly and he raised an eyebrow at what he read on it. 

“Ems, I think maybe we should leave the boys to their chat,” said Ruby, and as much as she hated to sacrifice free time with Killian, from the way he was fixated on his phone, his expression almost gleeful as he typed rapidly, Emma had to admit she was probably right. 

“Okay,” she said. “See you in class in a few minutes, Killian. And maybe hang out after school?”

“Hmmm? Oh, I have an appointment with Dr Hopper at four, but I can text you when I’m done.”

“Okay.” She smiled at him but his attention was back on his phone, so she followed Ruby out of the library trying not to feel too disgruntled. Killian should have other friends, she told herelf firmly, male ones who shared his interests. That was normal, and he could use some normal in his life right now.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Over the next few weeks, things at school settled back into a routine, albeit one that was markedly different than it had been. Neal had been officially arrested after David’s investigation, charged with burglary, theft, and theft of a medical record, and was facing up to five years in prison. His parents had put up their house as collateral to pay his bail, but weren’t allowing him to return to school. 

“Not much point when he’ll just go straight back to the slammer after he’s sentenced,” said Ruby viciously. “So much for that football scholarship he was so cocky about.”

Emma tried to find some compassion for Neal and what was basically the wreck and ruin of his future, but couldn’t dredge up a single particle of it. He had committed several felonies for no other reason than to stick it to Killian for outsmarting him and for becoming her friend, and he’d committed them flagrantly and with no thought to the consequences. He’d probably thought there wouldn’t be any consequences. Killian was right: Neal deserved everything that was coming to him, if only for being so colossally, arrogantly stupid. 

People still whispered about Killian as he walked through the halls but true to character he paid little attention. He did, however, gradually began to open up more and allow more of himself to show through his defences, willingly participating in classes and talking to people other than Emma and Ruby. By the time finals week arrived had actually made a few friends. 

Killian reflected wryly that in a twisted sort of way Neal had done him a favour. With all his secrets now out on the open he was free to embrace the opportunity for a new life he’d found in Storybrooke. Not that there had been anything particularly wrong with the old life, at least since his father had finally left. He’d been a mean old drunk, Brennan Jones, and by the time he’d been forced to flee his creditors for good, stealing a boat from Bristol harbour and melting into the offshore underworld, his sons had been glad to see the back of him. Killian thought about what he himself had been like back then, before Milah, and even though it had only been about a year since he’d first become involved with her so much had changed both in his circumstances and in himself, he feared that hopeful, enthusiastic boy was lost forever. Who exactly had taken his place was the question Killian had asked himself daily for weeks now, and he still wasn’t sure how to answer it. He’d become so used to holding everything in, to keeping such a tight rein on his thoughts and feelings that letting them out, accepting that it was okay to express them had become almost unbelievably difficult. The only person he felt even remotely comfortable being fully himself with aside from Liam was Emma, whose support and friendship remained unwavering as he bumbled and struggled thorough the reclamation of his life, and he remained intensely grateful for it. 

Only one thing about Emma troubled him-- that she no longer seemed to be interested in anything beyond his friendship. All the little hints and cues she had been giving him since they’d met were suddenly gone, and while he was relieved to be free of the added stress of constantly resisting something that part of him desperately wanted, he couldn’t help wondering if there was a darker motivation for this abrupt about-face. Perhaps, whispered an evil little voice in his head, Emma was actually more disgusted by his past than she let on and was simply too kind to tell him directly. Maybe the thought of him touching her turned her stomach now. He certainly couldn’t blame her if it did.   

“What do you want from your relationship with Emma?” asked Dr Hopper one afternoon, after Killian had finally brought himself to mention the change in her behaviour. “Do you want it to be romantic?”

Killian frowned, struggling to sort through the complex tangle of his feelings about and for Emma. “I don’t want a romantic relationship with anyone,” he said finally. “I still feel too messed up for anything like that. But I— I’m still really attracted to her. I think about her all the time, about how we kissed at her party, and I want to kiss her again pretty much constantly, but then I remember Milah and how I thought I felt about her, and I just—” 

“You don’t trust your judgement.” 

“Yeah.” 

“Killian, it’s important for you to remember that you have a much more equal relationship with Emma than you ever did with Milah.”

“Equal, with Emma?” Killian snorted. “You have met her, right?”

Dr Hopper smiled patiently. “I understand that you feel she’s beyond your reach, and that’s a separate issue, but what I mean by equal is that she’s your age and at your stage of life. With Milah you were constantly struggling to relate to her life and her experiences, and when you couldn’t you attempted to make up for that by offering her the affection and sexual attention she craved. You forced yourself to offer these things even though you didn’t genuinely feel them because you feared the consequences of not offering them. But with Emma there is no need to manufacture anything. She is placing no demands on you and therefore any attraction and affection you feel for her is genuine.”

“But what should I do about it?”

“Why should you have to do anything? You said you’re not ready for a romantic relationship, and that’s fine. Let yourself heal. The process is slow and frustrating, but believe me you are making progress. Let your feelings for Emma and your relationship with her develop at a pace that is comfortable for you. From what you’ve said it sounds like she will still be there when, if, you’re ready for more.” 

“It’s more than likely she no longer wants more. And even if she did, what happens when she meets someone who isn’t so hopelessly fucked up? Then where does that leave me?”

“Why don’t you worry about that if —not when— it happens?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the last day before winter break, Emma nervously approached Killian’s locker and handed him an invitation to her parents’ annual Christmas party addressed to him and Liam. 

“It’s just a thing they do every year for their friends and our neighbours,” she began to ramble as he examined the card, certain he would refuse and wanting to delay that painful moment. “My mom loves to entertain, and my dad says it’s good for building a rapport between law enforcement and the community, and—”

“Swan,” interrupted Killian, giving her that soft, indulgent look that said he knew exactly what she was thinking. “I’m sure we’d love to attend. Thank you for inviting us.” 

The butterflies soared in a grand jeté, and she felt like she was flying with them. “Great,” she said trying to keep her voice calm, “I guess I’ll see you then.”

Her delighted smile made his breath catch, and his answering grin set her heart galloping. Their eyes met and held, and as the end of semester chaos whirled around them they stood a breath apart, swathed in frustrated yearning and brittle tension, the only two people in the world.  

Then the final bell rang, and they leapt apart, Emma smoothing her skirt with shaking hands while Killian ran his own trembling fingers through his hair. 

“So, onion rings at Granny’s?” ventured Emma, wanting to kick herself for making him nervous again, after all her resolutions, hoping desperately he wouldn’t pull away. 

Killian sighed in relief, tinged with a hint of disappointment. Granny’s was safe. “Sounds perfect, love,” he said. 

[gothic-chicanery]

The Diary of Dr. Elena Rosewood

Horror one off story. I’m putting it under a cut

TW for blood, death, and disease

12/14/37

Sent to quarantine, and am currently kicking myself. I tested positive for the disease and the police didn’t listen to my explanations. Now I am without my lab and test instruments, and the data gathered will be strictly qualitative. Damnit.

Of course, this may be a blessing in disguise, as the effects of the vaccine will be able to be seen firsthand, and I’ll have to worry less about my own credibility. Though as a medical doctor who has spent years studying this disease, credibility was never too much of a worry.

I just hope someone takes care of my cats.

No symptoms so far, though that is expected. The incubation period is usually about a week, but this may be altered by the fact that this is a weaker strain that will be easy for my body to fight off. Maybe I will not have any symptoms at all. One can only hope I suppose.

12/16/37

A man leaned into me while I took my daily exercise yesterday, so close that his nose almost touched mine. Dark red sclera showed he was in the later stages of the disease. “We all have it in here,” he growled. “We are all infected.” His breath smelled awful, a mix of metallic and rot, as if someone had shot a deer in a penny factory.

“Yes,” I said slowly. “That is essentially the point of a quarantine.”

I’ve decided to keep mostly to myself from now on.

This story has very little to do with the scientific side of my work, but it is an anecdote that I think would provide quite the cinematic moment when there is a biopic made about me. I mean, the person who discovered a vaccine against the blood plague (though I always hated the sensational nature of that name) will surely get some sort of film recognition.

When I get out, of course, I’ll remove this section. But I believe it is best to be honest to yourself. The rest of the world can get the cool, collected scientist.

Asymptomatic probably still. I thought my sclera looked a little redder, but that may be more easily attributed to confirmation bias or the quality of the mirrors here. It’s a wonder I can see my reflection at all through the graffiti. Wishing I was home. Accurate testing equipment wherefore art thou? My ex, I’m sure, would correct me. Wherefore apparently means why even though it has a where in it. This, ladies and gentlemen, is why you never should date English majors. And they say scientists have sticks up their ass.

12/20/37

Definite redness now. I guess it was too much of a long shot that I wouldn’t end up with anything happening. I can’t decide which looks better, a miraculous recovery, or to never get sick at all. I think this. Looks like I’ve suffered more.

Though of course, this isn’t about me. It’s about all the people that I will be keeping safe from the disease.

12/25/37

Well. Merry Christmas to me. I’m Rudolph the Red-Eyed Fucking Reindeer. Disease taking hold. I think it’ll get worse before it gets better, damn it. It’ll definitely get better though. I’m confident in my own intelligence, if nothing else. I had hoped to be out of here before Christmas, but I guess that’s too much to ask for.

I’ve started tasting blood.  Every meal seems tainted metallic, though that might actually improve the shit they have us eating. It’s all frozen and half rotten, bottom of the barrel kind of stuff. I guess that makes sense, why waste the good food on those of us that are going to die anyway? I mean, I won’t. But for the rest of them, why bother. There is no cure for the blood plague. Even I’ve only managed to come up with a vaccine.

1/3/38

I lost my journal. No, more accurately, it was stolen by the motherfucker from before. More accurately, he stole it, bled on the pages, and then threw it outside the fence. I have no clue why. He’s bad, blood streaming from his eyes and lips. I could barely make out what he was trying to say, every time he tried to speak, blood dribbled out. Not that I cared what he had to say. I’d imagine he only had days left.

My own condition isn’t getting better, though it hasn’t gotten noticeably worse. Small amounts of blood in my mouth, my spit has been slightly tinged pink for the last few days. I calculated the turnaround though. It should be any day now. Any day…

I debated whether or not to write down how I’m writing this, as my journal is no longer here, and decided why not. It’s blood on my wall. I know what you’re thinking, that i’ve likely gone insane, that the blood plague is taking hold. It’s not, I can promise you that. When you look at it, it’s perfect logical.

My top priority is information. I have to record these events so that the process of my vaccine can be documented and studied. As a scientist, I know the most essential thing is data. I need to be able to provide that. I’ve just been forced to use alternative methods.

He would’ve died anyway. There is no cure for the blood plague, and he barely had days left. Something that saves lives is more important than the death of one man, I know it seems macabre but he would’ve died in days. Is it really even a murder when you’re both on death row?

He is.

Was.

I’m not. I’m going to live.

It wasn’t hard, really, to kill him. He wasn’t strong, and it was quite easy to split his head open. The blood just mingled with what was already on the floor and walls, have I mentioned this place has gotten disgusting with all the blood. Dragged him to my room, dipped my finger in, and began writing.

I don’t want this to sound horrific. It’s not. I distanced myself from things, made the matter merely academic. When dissecting something, you don’t contemplate the pathos, you just analyze. That is merely what I’m doing. He would’ve died soon anyway.

1/11/38

The body stinks to high heaven and I can barely get enough blood to write with without a few maggots or flies crawling over my fingers. I need to remain objective but they are truly disgusting.

Blessing in disguise, perhaps, my own eyes have begun dripping. My mouth too, though that’s diluted. I can keep writing. I will document this. I will wait for my body to fight off the vaccine, for immunity to kick in. I will be the one to figure it out I will be known I will be a savior

Just a little longer

[stedebonnit]

can’t get this out of my head

OK so whatever BTS ends maybe I dont really know but then it ends with chloe and rachel together on the Blackwell campus and they take a picture together and then it freezes on the photo and slowly zooms out and Chloe is holding it because she just dug it out of the back of her truck or on her old phone or something and she and max are looking at it and chloe is smiling but max isnt and chloe is like "what's wrong"

And max pauses then says "I was there"

"What?"

"I was there. That day. There was a blackwell campus tour for students who were considering attending. They had just announced Jefferson would be starting in the fall so i begged my parents to let me come."

"OK but why does that-"

"I could go back."

"What?"

"I could go back there."

"I could change everything. I could... I could save rachel."

"Wait but i thought you had to be in the photo.. How would you-"

Max points to a group of people in the background of the photo. Max’s head is just barely visible in the crowd. Chloe closes her mouth, speechless for the first time.

Silence sits with them for a moment before max speaks up again

"I dont know if it would solve anything. We hadn't reunited yet you might not even..."

"Max, i will always believe you."

"The storm would probably still-"

"We've fought the storm once... We can do it again."

They both pause and smile.

"You can finally meet rachel." Chloe says softly. Max smiles and nods, taking Chloe's hand. "That is... If she hadnt already given up on me..."

"She never gave up on you, Chloe. Frank, Jefferson, they were adults who had so much to offer in her eyes."

"But she loved him. Frank I mean. Jefferson too... Before he..."

"But she loved you first. I dont think she ever stopped."

Chloe looks down, pulling her hand away.

"We don't have to... If you don't want..." Max says softly

"No. We have to try, max. Even if it means getting to see you one more time before all of this. If it means you meeting rachel... We have to try." 

Max smiles and takes the photo in both hands, beginning to focus her eyes.

"Wait." Chloe says, breaking Max's concentration. "Before we do this I... I want you to know that having you is enough. I mean, of course I want rachel back with us but... If it doesn't work.. Or even if it does i need you to know that having you is enough for me. And this is as much your decision as it is mine." 

Max smiles softly, once again taking chloes hand. 

"I know." She says.

Before she can say anything else chloe releases maxs hand and reaches to her neck, pulling off her necklace and carefully wrapping it around Max’s hand. 

"For luck." She says softly. Max leans in and softly kisses Chloe. When they finally break apart the only further goodbye they need is a simple nod before max focus once more on the photo, quickly finding herself being pulled through the photo.

***

Max opens her eyes to find herself on the blackwell campus. She's younger, but sporting the same tshirt and jeans pairing as always. Shes in the middle of a crowd of potential students. She quickly recognizes a hopeful looking kate among many unfamiliar faces. Her parents stand on either side of her. Max prepares to break free of the crowd when she notices something tucked in her fingers. She open her hand to find Chloe’s necklace wrapped gently around her fingers.

“Like it’s meant to be…” Max mutters softly to herself. But she doesnt have time to think about this. Max quickly pushes her way through the crowd, breaking out of the tour guides slow droning speech about blackwells history. She looks around briefly before spotting them: two girls, one with shoulder length dirty blonde hair and the other with freshly dyed bright blue, both admiring the photo they had just taken. Laughing. 

It takes max a second to compose herself. Seeing Chloe so happy... Laughing, standing shoulder to shoulder with rachel. Beautiful Rachel. Even more beautiful than she had been in photos. Every aspect of her from the way she dresses to the way she holds herself screams confidence. The way she leans against Chloe protectively as though she would do anything for the blue haired punk. Everything about them screams "More than friends."

Quickly max is able to overcome her shock as she breaks into a run towards them. As soon as shes behind them she reaches up her hand and gently taps Chloe on the shoulder. Chloe huffs as she begins to turn 

"Im allowed on the blackwell campus as long as im in the company of a--- max?!" 

Rachel turns now too, her blonde hair falling from behind her ear. 

"Who... Wait... THE max?" Rachel says, her green eyes squinting in distain. 

"Max Caulfeild, former pirate. Rachel amber, right?" Max says, beaming as she offers her hand. Rachel takes it and offers one confused shake. Its clear that rachel hates her. But it doesnt matter. If anything it makes maxs smile grow. Rachel really did love chloe. Just the way she steps forward, as though shes prepared to take a bullet for her...

Max turns away from rachel and pulls chloe into a tight hug. Chloe hesitates before gently patting max on the back. When she pulls away, chloes confusion only grows. 

"How do you know rachel? And what are you doing here?"

"Campus tour.. Going to Blackwell... Its a long story..." 

Rachel cuts in

"Chloe I thought she never texted you back… how does she know me? Is she stalking us?”

"-she didnt... I dont think she's stalking us..."

"You have to listen. Chloe, rachel, i dont have much time. Its a long story. You know mark Jefferson?"

Rachel lights up momentarily "the photographer? I heard he's coming to blackwell and-"

"-rachel has a crush on him" chloe retorts

"Come on chloe, you know you’re the only i have eyes for." She leans in and kisses chloe. Max feels her stomach drop momentarily. She had suspected rachel and chloe had been more than friends, but chloe had never been willing to talk about it. What if max fixes everything only to be left without chloe?

It doesn’t matter. saving rachel is more important.

"Mark jefferson is insane and dangerous... And...god... i dont know how to explain this to you but... Rachel, mark jefferson is going to kill you. Well, nathan prescott will kill you... Jefferson covers it up. And chloe you wont know this... For a long time. Youll search for her tirelessly... And eventually ill.. Ill come back. Ill come back and help you search and... God, im sorry, im so sorry but we find her body."

"Okay what the HELL is going on here?" Rachel says angrily, pulling Chloe away 

"Wait." Chloe says softly, causing maxs heart to leap. 

"Youre not telling me you believe this insanity." 

"That necklace... Max that's my necklace. Ive worn in every day since rachel gave it to me... I would never give it away unless-"

Max holds up the necklace wrapped around her fingers for both girls to see.

"You gave it to me. Chloe, ive watched you die so many times but i saved you... And I need to save you again. One more time. I need to save you by saving her because.. I know i abandoned you. I was wrong, chloe, but i want to make it right. Because one day you and i will love each other. SO much. With everything we have. And even now, you still love rachel. A long time from now. You never stop loving her just like ill never stop loving you. So please. Let me save you one more time. I can take you both away from here. We can run. To LA, or even back to seattle…it doesn’t matter, but we can get far away from here. My parents have a car, you have a truck, it doesnt matter how we do it. But we can run. The three of us, together. Away from Jefferson, away from the storm and the pain and-" max is tearing up now, she hadnt even noticed taking hold of chloes hand.

"Youre not an actor by chance, are you?" Rachel cuts in, a little bit of her initial protectiveness melting away. 

"Ive never been good at acting." Max says softly.

"I think we should go." Rachel says. Chloes looks up at her

"Really?"

"I have a feeling... Like the feeling i had that first night at the firewalk concert.. Like... Like its…”

"Destiny." Chloe cuts in, grinning.

Max beams up at them. 

"I have to tell you... I wont remember this conversation when its over... Youll have to explain this all to me...but i promise to believe you. Ill always believe you."

Chloe beams and takes both girls hands, the three of them run towards the parking lot and the picture fades.

***

a photo of chloe and david fighting burns and is replaced with A photo featuring max, chloe and rachel in the back of chloes truck. Max is confused as chloe and Rachel explain to her whats happening. 

***

A picture of rachel and jefferson meeting on Blackwell campus burns and is replaced with a picture of the three girls curled up, sleeping in the back seat with a small town surrounding them.

***

Picture of chloe looking at a phone with no replies from max burns and is replaced with a photo of the girls driving by the LA sign

***

A picture of chloe and nathan in the bathroom burns and is replaced with a picture of rachel modeling for a magazine cover 

***

A picture of chloe and max finding rachels body burns and is replaced with a picture of the girls admiring Max’s photos in a gallery

*** 

A picture of max and chloe going up to the lighthouse during the storm burns and is replaced with a picture of max and chloe holding each other while reading a newpaper about the storm.

***

Finally it flashes to chloe, max and rachel in an apartment. Max and rachel are cuddled up on the couch while Chloe cooks food. 

"Listen, i get that youre both the ones bringing in the big bucks but that doesnt mean i dont deserve a cuddle too." Chloe says, placing the bacon onto a plate with eggs and carrying it over to the table in front of the girls. Rachel releases max and taps the spot on the couch beside her. Chloe scoots in closely and rachel kisses her hard. Max curls in and kisses rachels cheek before leaning across her to kiss chloe. 

"Thank you for breakfast, babe. Youre a great housewife." Rachel teases, max laughs. 

"Max you look different are you..."

"Wait, it’s today isnt it?" Rachel cuts in. Chloe looks confused for a moment before it dawns on her

"Mad max, youre back arent you? The real you?" Max nods happily.

"Its about time" rachel says, nudging max teasingly 

"I guess we have a lot of explaining to do.." Chloe says. The scene zooms out on Chloe and rachel speaking to max, laughing. It continues to zoom out to their apartment high up with a view of the ocean and the hollywood sign in the distance. 

The scene fades to black. 

~fin~