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#In fairness it could be worse
screwpinecaprice · 2 years
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I probably drew this while being in a dark place.
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inkskinned · 1 year
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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linterteatime · 2 years
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Another skrunkly scrimblo for the collection
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Insane again thinking about Sonic and Tails
Everyone always talks about the ways in which Tails is dependent on or revolves around Sonic. We talk about the ways in which he's depended on Sonic to save him, the way he likes tagging along on journeys, the way Sonic has inspired him, the way he always maintains Sonic's plane, leaves his door open for him with place to rest and good food to eat
But we rarely talk about the ways in which Sonic is secretly dependent or reliant on Tails
In a large portion of the games, if Tails isn't straight up on the journey alongside him, Sonic has the security that Tails can communicate with him from afar, and Tails usually appears to help out at some point during one of Sonic’s solo journeys. He doesn't have to be without Tails for long
And we see what happens (especially in Sonic Frontiers and Sonic Prime) when Tails is inaccessible. In Frontiers, he wonders where Tails aloud is unprompted, wanting to find him. Sonic's other friends even convince him to bother with the secrets of the starfall islands because doing so may lead him to Tails. He wants to find Tails so Tails can make sense of what's happening. And in Prime, Sonic ends up scrambling without Tails around. Especially in Prime S1 while things make the least sense, he seeks out Tails first (and then later hopes variants other than Nine can fill Tails' role) because he trusts him. He trusts that if Tails is here, then he can just tell Sonic what to do (come up with a plan for him to execute). With Tails around, Sonic doesn’t have to worry about not understanding the situation because Tails can figure it out. Without Tails, Prime!Sonic often shifts between trying to handle things himself to the best of his knowledge while rolling with the punches, and deferring to someone he can trust as a smarter strategizer to tell him what to do (a role Nine fills most notably, but other characters such as Rebel and Shadow fill on the occasion).
Of course there's also the earlier mentioned way in which Tails takes care of Sonic as well. I'm sure Tails isn't Sonic's only friend that he could crash with, but it's Tails who goes to such lengths to open his arms for him. If Sonic wants to crash in an actual house, if he wants to eat his favorite food, if he just wants to hang out, or if he needs help, Tails's home is open to him, accommodating his every need.
In my eyes, Sonic is the one who is surprisingly codependent here, who flounders a bit when everything goes to shit, Tails is nowhere to be found and can't be contacted, and there's no one else that can help him make sense of things. He takes Tails with him on so many journeys, even in games like Colors, where Tails largely follows behind Sonic while Sonic does a lot of the physical work. Tails doesn't need to be "useful" to tag along. He likes having Tails around, he wants Tails around. When Tails can't go with him or it's something Sonic should go alone for, he can always communicate with him and hear his voice from afar. And I'd argue there are more examples than Sonic Prime that may demonstrate Sonic trying to find someone to fill Tails' role the first chance he can get when Tails isn't around and can't be contacted.
The conclusion here is that a lot of people talk about Tails being dependent on Sonic or revolving around him, but they truly are partners. Sonic wants to be around Tails at this point perhaps as much as Tails always wants to be around Sonic. The two are strong together, they fill each other's gaps in ability. They both feel more secure when the other is around, and they rely on each other's presence. They are each a comforting existence to the other in similar and different ways.
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umarthiels · 2 years
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jack seward, quincey morris, arthur holmwood
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beautysnake · 2 months
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thanks to your narilamb gif thing i am debating on selling tiny cute necklace jars that are cotl themed and labeled narilamb spit
I-,,,
Okay
yes
i am an accomplice now
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arthurtaylorlester · 10 months
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so like do you ever think about john doe
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starflungwaddledee · 5 months
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>> start the adventure! << || [masterpost] ||
while starstruck makes her merry way to the @kirbyoctournament, why not keep her company with some questions?
for the next month, as propaganda for the tourney, dream land's favourite little anxious amnesiac will be taking asks directly!
couple of little notes, suggestions, and rules!
though this is hopefully obvious, i don't guarantee i'll get to every ask or interaction! i'll do the best i can, but if i don't make it to yours, it's nothing personal! where possible these will be answered "in character" from tourney!starstruck, though you can still ask me tournament related things too! this is my first time trying "in character" asks, but i want to make one thing really clear: please no text rp. makes me incredibly uncomfortable. for plot consistency, this is set during her Present Timeline, and she knows as much about her own backstory as the average reader. has no idea who This Guy is. she has similarly not yet encountered the star spears or any weapon like them. questions can come from ocs, especially if they're in the tournament! i may not draw your oc in the response though. i probably won't respond to any "how are you" generic type deals because those will get hard to answer pretty much immediately. i am hoping to find some fun personality combos to riff off, so if you have an interesting interaction idea for our ocs, feel free to share! starstruck is Technically Romancable and OCs who are at least 25+ are totally welcome to make an attempt to flirt with her (pspsps evil lesbians especially if you're out there come say hi. any and all wings havers also), but remember she is dense as a pile of bricks. also please no nsfw.
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roxiusagi · 11 months
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Sangcheng week Day 2 - Music
Even with all the effort that Nie-zongzhu put into not cultivating properly with the Nie sabers, he still starts suffering from Qi deviations just like his predecessors, due to accumulated heart demons from the past decade. He vehemently refuses to be treated with the song of clarity for the longest time and only finally relents when he is promised to be held through it and kept safe by his beloved.
(this time i went with the live-action flavour because i never tried that before and it was pretty fun change actually haha)
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ishootthelightsout · 1 month
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Imagine driving the Reagan car 💀
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becomingabeing · 1 year
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Sand, the guy with an illegal plum wine business and who knows how many side hustles to make ends meet, destroying his phone to exact revenge was The Moment
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fairyroses · 2 years
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— SMALLVILLE, “Rogue” (1.09)
+ the relevant ‘TalkVille’ discussions
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arandomhumanperson · 10 months
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Sometimes you can create unique and stylish shoes that you fall in love with and fit the persons vibe completely,
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And sometimes you get Purple Nightmare Sneakers of Pain.
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 months
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...
#i never really thought about a person being a finite thing. you can see the effects of a person after they die. in the unfinished projects.#in the rooms of clutter. in abandoned closets. in pictures and in mermered phrases. and you can see time#chipping away at those things. eroding away the evidance that a person existed. clothes move into other people's closets. projects are boxed#away. and a person becomes confined to photos and memories. and thats existentially terrifying but its not a bad thing. time erodes away all#things. that's how life works. matter and energy transforms.#we arent made to last forever. i dunno. i guess im still just rattled from being home even tho ive been back a week and a half.#and my brain tends to fixate on the wrong things. nearly 27 years of knowing someone eclipsed by a visual sequence lasting less than a day.#bc i just cant get over how scary it would be to die like that. to start losing control of your body. to not be able to feed yourself or get#to the bathroom. to have your mind be overcome by the toxins building up in your mangled and broken body.#and it could have been worse. it could have been a lot worse. but its still not fair. theres no good way to die. i dunno. i guess i just#miss my mom in some abstract way but i find it more viscerally upsetting to think about the people that have to deal with her absence.#it makes me sad that my dad is alone now. i dunno. grief doesnt feel like i thought it would. most of the time i dont even know what im#crying about. its undirected. it doesnt feel like: i miss you. it feels like: youre gone. how can you be gone? why does everything feel the#same? and its not that it doesnt make sense. its that nothings changed. the terror of that.#and im walking around in an acumulation of my dead mother's clothes. and no one knows. theyll never know.#and there's nothing to be done about it. so it goes.#i guess im just sad. and its hard to breathe at the thought of returning to school at the end of August.#unrelated
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thevoidstaredback · 1 month
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2021
Me: I work in a different city almost everyday this month. Can I take the train? It'll save ya gas and money and time
Parents: No
2022
Me: I work in a different city almost everyday this month. To save gas and money, can I take the train?
Parents: No
2023
Me: I work in a different city almost everyday this month. Can I take the train to save gas and money?
Parents: No
2024
Me: I work in a different city almost everyday this month. Can I take the train to save gas and money?
Parents: No
Parents, a week later: Buy a train pass because gas is expensive
Me: Okay, but I don't get paid until Tuesday
Parents, that Tuesday: Don't get a pass; we'll take you to work
Me: Alright, then I'm going to spend this $85 on food and gas
Parents, yesterday: You're taking the train to work tomorrow because gas is expensive
Me, to myself: If you'd actually teach me to drive, we wouldn't be having this problem
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thenewgothicromance · 4 months
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I’m only into niche fandoms now. Blorbo from my fourteenth century poem. Blorbo from my vague collection of psuedo-historical European folklore. Me in 2014 looking for fan art of x-men characters on tumblr < me in 2024 searching the Getty library’s online database of illuminated manuscripts to see if there’s any drawings of my favorite little knight in there.
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