#Loved to see it tho absolutely adorable and brought so much joy to my heart!!

[howtotrainyourhiccup]

bitch i forgot miraculous ladybug was a kids show… so many kids trick or treating ln were dressed as her and I excitedly went “OMG YOU LIKE MIRACULOUS LADYBUG TOO???!!” LMFAOO 😭😭

[nemo-in-wonderland]

So, as I mentioned yesterday night, I decided to share some of the stuff that I had created, back in 2007, for the Naruto Fandom.

Now, please, for the love of all that's holy, be lenient with me, because I was a bebe that just wanted to have fun and create her own little bubble in Konoha, playing with her own ocs and just have fun with different ideas!

here are 10 artworks that I chose from the old pictures I took of my artworks before leaving Italy, back in 2016.

I have to give credit to baby me, because she was more daring and less scared of making mistakes, but I have to be honest, it was much easier when I was doing all this just for myself.

Literally, this artworks have been seen only by my baby brother and my husband, when I met him (hilariously, through Naruto, because he had a Sasuke Pfp on his old Messenger Blog, and I was in full on Shippuuden hyperfixation when I contacted him), so I am a little nervous sharing them all here, in the open.

But they brought me SO MUCH joy, I loved them all SO MUCH, it's not even a joke!

So, here you have Yukaku Onikarasu Kureaki, my Demon Bird Girl, and Sayuri Onitora Kureaki, my Demon Tiger boy.

Sayuri has SUCH a special place in my heart, because he was the very first male character that I tried to draw, and I am still very proud of him to this day. I shipped him with Iruka, SO HARD. Like in my brain, they were OTP, and they still are to this day (tho, in later revisions, he is in a poly relationship with Iruka and Makoto Aoyama, a character from "Love Hina" another manga I absolutely ADORED).

Then you have small Yukaku, who was Sayuri's little sister, around the same age as Naruto, if a tad younger, and who I basically had hooked up with Kankuro, and moved to the Sunagakure, despite her basically being raised in Konoha.

Their whole story is rather complex, because they are siblings raised by different family (Sayuri in the Kumogagure, Yukaku in Konohagakure by Asuma and Kurenai). They were born as regular Shinobi, but because of who their parents were (and especially their mother - the one I portrayed in the last picture along with Tobirama Senju), they were tested upon, and infused with the genes of the Demonic Tiger and Demonic Crow, hence making them both, de facto, Oni.

This is just a very very VEEERY bare bone summary of who they are. As I said in my previous post on my main blog, the lore that I have going on for them is as extensive as the one I have for Assassin's Creed Syndicate, and if you know me, you know how freaking thorough and exhaustive that is.

(please, click on the pictures if you want to see them better!)

So, yeah!

Here you have a small sneak peek of what was going on in my mind during those years! 😂😂

Who knows, I might try to redraw them again, once I have my pen with me.

well, I hope you will like them just as much as I did love them (and still do).

--Nemo

[boysthatgovroomvroom]

Baby Girl {Lando Norris}

So.. Because of @huskyandbeautiful I now have baby fever... This was completely not planned and I'm just writing what comes to mind. Enjoy? I guess?

Lando Norris x Reader

When yours and Landos little girl was born in the end of December you were over the moon. Little Mila was the sunshine of the family and she brought such joy to the two of you. She had Landos curly brown hair and your eyes, always sparkling. And you noticed over time she was an absolute daddy's girl. Of course she loved you, but when the both you were in the room she always wanted to be held by him. Her eyes looking at him full of adoration and love. It was the cutest thing ever. But it seemed like she always knew when you and Lando were having a moment because more than once it was that you two were cuddling on the couch or kissing and she started crying, like she was demanding for Lando. She was the calmest when she was in his arms.

But then the season had begun and your life suddenly became much harder. With Lando gone little Mila was crying more then ever. She missed him even more than you did. Normally you would have traveled with him but you didn't want to strain Mila with long hours on the flight. You and Lando facetimed but it was hard with time differences and trying to let Mila get used to a proper sleep schedule. But you managed.

Now it was July and Mila was over half a year old. This weekend was the British Grand Prix and because it was not far away from home you'd be attending. Lando had been excited for you to come back to the race track and even tho Mila couldn't quite understand it yet, she felt his excitement as well.

Which brought us to now. You were walking to the paddock entrance from the parking lot with Mila on your hip. She looked around, taking in the new surroundings. People were taking pictures of you and fans were waving and making funny faces at your daughter, making her giggle adorably. She really was a sunshine that brightened up everyone's day.

On the way through the paddock you saw Carlos coming up to you with a big smile on his face. He opened his arms and when Mila recognized him she leaned forward reached for him to take her.

"There's my little goddaughter. Come here, little one"

He took Mila from you and she beamed at her godfather. She smashed her hands against his cheeks and squished them together. She was babbling at him like she was telling him a story and he just nodded along while you two got to the Mclaren garage.

When you walked in Landos engineer Will greeted you. He gave you a hug and stroked Milas cheek.

"Hello sunshine. Good to see you. Gonna watch your dad race huh?"

Mila, still smiling as always, gave him a squeal. At the same time she began wiggling around in Carlos arms to get out of his arms. She was feeling that Lando was close. You took her from Carlos because he had to get to his side of the garage. You followed Will who gave you two sets of headsets, one for you and one for Mila.

The garage was busy, like always. People moving around, working on the car or just talking. You could see Lando with his back turned to you and instantly a smile grew on your face. It was good to be back in the garage, watching him do what he had dreamed of doing for years and what he loved doing. Just seeing him like this made the butterflies flutter in your stomach. Mila recognized him too as she reached out for him and let out a squeal to make him notice her.

Lando turned around and his face lit up when he saw his girlfriend and dauther standing in the garage, both with smiles on their faces. He came up to you and crouched down a bit to be face to face with Mila.

"Hey there buttercup. I missed you so much."

He took her from you and peppered kisses over her face. Mila was full on giggling at this point. He hoisted her on his hip and pulled you close with his other arm. He smiled at you and you felt like a teenager again. Your heart started racing and your hands began sweating. What this man did to you.

"I'm so glad you're here. It isn't the same without you."

He then leaned in to kiss you. But Mila, being the daddy's girl that she was, pushed your face away from his. You both laughed and Lando pressed a kiss on her cheek.

"Silly Mila."

[genesisrose74]

Christmas with the Karasuno Boys (HC’s)!!

Part 1: Daichi, Suga, Asahi, Nishinoya, Tanaka, & Ennoshita

Part 2 (Kageyama, Hinata, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Kinoshita, & Narita) here!!

A/n: Tumblr said my word count was too much so I’m splitting this bad boi up into two parts :p Enjoy!!

*****

Daichi

A huge romantic during Christmas, 10/10 quality cliche times spent together

You wanna go ice skating? Hell yeah sweetheart, he will make it the most beautifully romantic thing you’ve ever seen

Like straight out of a holiday postcard type beat

Istg the rink he takes you to looks like a more heartwarming version of Rockefeller Center

He’s a big keeper of tradition when it comes to making plans, but doesn’t mind a bit of nonsense fun when everything falls into place

Which is why you love to bring the team along on adventures because they make everything all the more entertaining

At first he’s confused like ??? You don’t have to do that just if they’ve been pestering you about it

But then he realizes you care as much about them as he does (hint: a hell of a lot) and they’re thus invited along for some stuff

Of course y’all also get some quality time together on dates with just you both

Anyways you and Daichi have talked a lot about traveling and how he was really interested in seeing new places

So as his gift you got him a carved map with a roll of red string and thumbtacks, so that he could plan out all the places he wanted to visit

You know how when Kiyoko found the “Fly” banner for Karasuno and all the boys cried?

Yeah

Like that but with lots more hugging and laughing

“You know you’re gonna have to help with mapping this out, right?”

“Is that an invitation I hear?”

“Oh, that’s a promise”

FJSFJDSK ALEXA PLAY AMERICAN BOY BY ESTELLE���

Please I love him; he is so damn sly and sassy I will die with this headcanon

Sugawara

I swear on everything that Christmas with him is equivalent to a Hallmark movie

It smells like joy and warmth wherever he is, and this season only amplifies it

He is such a cheeseball without even having to try

But it’s in the really endearing and heart-melting way,,, just MMM PERFECT

He’ll take you on a walk through those neighborhoods with those crazy light decorations in the front yard and buy you hot chocolate

If he sees a group of little kids gaping at all the lights, he’ll leave them starry-eyed with stories of magic, reindeer, Santa and so-forth

“You know, I’ve heard that Rudolph’s nose is supposed to be brighter than the world’s most powerful Christmas light”

Good heavens, children absolutely adore this man

Anyways he’ll make it a little game as y’all walk around this beautifully lit neighborhood, both of you with a different assortment of bingo squares printed on paper

First one to bingo chooses a movie to watch after getting back to Suga’s house

Will wrap a big fluffy blanket around you both and pull you into his chest while watching the movie

For his gift, you got a star named after him

It’s because y’all alway go stargazing for dates every month, just to sit out, talk and cuddle

Suga gave you the SOFTEST look after opening your gift and this cute little card you made 🥺

“Lets go try to find my new favorite star”

PLEASE HE IS SO SWEET

“Right now? Koushi it’s 11:30 pm”

“Just for ten minutes, and then I’ll get you home”

So y’all spend the rest of Christmas Eve on his roof, sipping warm tea and attempting to locate Star Suga

Asahi

Cuddle bear alert ‼️‼️

It’s basically hibernation time for him, because he’s not the biggest fan of cold

That’s alright with you though 😌 more coziness for you

Lots of quality moments indoors means more creative dates

A whole day devoted to chill present wrapping? Hell fuckin’ yeah

Nice music, pretty wrapping paper, shiny bows, maybe a little Christmas rom-com playing in the back — the whole shebang

You find out pretty quickly that despite how it sounds, it’s actually quite a satisfying and enjoyable pastime

Practically had to drag him out of your living room to secretly wrap his own gift

As much as he’s the king of timidity and soft™, he can be very playfully stubborn when he’s comfortable, hence why he was such an ass to get out of the room

I have no doubt that Asahi would melt for the most adorable, cheesy shit

So you not only bought him some really reliable headbands for volleyball use, but you also made a little coupon booklet

He can basically cash in paper promises for certain things, like getting to choose the next date idea, picking a movie to watch without any objection, having you make his favorite food, etc.

There’s one that he can exchange for a full out spa day trip, because good heavens he’s a sucker for those

Massage and exfoliation and everything — it makes him feel ✨refreshed✨

He was ecstatic fam, I don’t even know what to say

Like a puppy who just got a bunch of toys and a new backyard to play

Mans cashes in one almost immediately, and at first you’re confused

Like it’s Christmas time bubs, what are we gonna be able to do when most places are closed and it’s the holidays?

Then you read the paper

“Free hug (can be used and renewed <3)”

GIVE HIM HIS DAMN HUGS RIGHT NOW

He uses that one a lot throughout the upcoming days, to the point where he just keeps the paper on him for fun

“You realize you can just ask me silly, you don’t need to keep carrying the coupon around”

“Yeah, but it’s entertaining”

Cute little cheeky bastard

Nishinoya

LOVES LOVES LOVES CHRISTMAS

You know the 12 Days of Christmas? The song??

He gets you a small present EVERY DAY for all 12 days

Not to mention he has a big present that he saves for the actual holiday

Y’all are the type of couple to get ice cream in the middle of winter

Nishi loves his cold snacks any time of year, and you’ve thus picked up a similar taste

He will consistently pester you about what kind of present you got him

Gets pouty when you don’t tell him, but in the back of his mind he’s glad because it would ruin the surprise

Anything you get him instantly becomes his most prized gift tho

It could be a literal rock with googly eyes and he’d put it in a protective glass case for preservation

But of course you get him something better than that because he only deserves the best

He’s got this specific assortment of products to maintain his spiky hair and to make sure it’s healthy, but they’re pretty expensive to buy when he runs out

When he tore open your present’s decorative wrapping to discover a huge basket of basically every hair product he ever needed, he got wide-eyed

There was also a booklet of little notes you’d kept throughout the month that listed all the little things you noticed and adored about your precious boyfriend

He nearly CRIED reading them

“Baby, you didn’t have to do all that for me”

“You act like you don’t deserve all of it and more, Nishi”

Refuses to leave your side after that

Holding your hand, hugging you as tight as he can, etc.

He is head over heels idc idc

Tanaka

Another man who is obsessed with the holiday season and everything that comes with it

He is the biggest sap for this shit istg

Will spend hours trying to get you the best present of all time

And he succeeds exceptionally

Mistletoe? He’s got an ABUNDANCE on hand at any time, just to make sure he can get fair share of his kissies 🥰

His signature beanie appears in full force during winter

Sometimes you’ll pull it over his eyes before giving him a peck on the cheek and dashing off in the school halls

“I’ll see you after school, babe!”

Speech = jumbled + incomprehensible

“Uh hUh, you do that~”

He’s: adorable

I just know that he melts for really sweet and thought-out gifts

Like anything you give him he’ll adore, don’t get me wrong, but the ones done with special care and love are just his kryptonite

He brought you into a massive bear hug and spun you around when he opened a photo book of old pictures taken together, complete with lots of cute messages and anecdotes written alongside them

You and Saeko may have also gone in on another present for him without his knowledge

And on Christmas Eve, you dragged a curious Tanaka into his front yard to the sight of a shiny motorbike

It was Saeko’s old one that she’d held onto for a while, and an old schoolmate offered to fix it up nice in time for the holiday at a discount, so y’all decided to divvy up the lowered price and got it done for Ryu

Sweet boy was taken aback, with his hands clapped over his mouth and everything

Saeko patted him on the back as he stood there in shock, giving her baby brother a sweet smile

“All yours, little bro!”

Ya, Saeko fucking loves you 😌 and so does Tanaka

Overall very lovely, would cry to be loved by the Tanaka siblings

Ennoshita

After spending past Decembers with his fellow second year classmates (namely, the very enthusiastic Noya and Tanaka), he’s grown to know quite a bit about the different holiday events that go on around town

Still, Ennoshita is a pretty simplistic guy and is content with simply spending time with you

So when you recommended going to pick a Christmas tree out for your place together, he’s totally down

As long as he gets to help decorate too ☺️

Y’all end up picking a beauty of a tree ngl

It’s SO TALL

And a super stronk friend — fit for the most heavy duty of ornaments

It takes some damn work to get that bad boi inside and upright after driving back to your house

But like hell did that stop you

Now that it was all set up, sturdy, and given plenty of water, decorations were brought into the equation that same night

No rest until it’s all set up and looking mighty beautiful

Okay maybe some coffee breaks in between, but other than that the grind don’t stop ✋😤

Ennoshita is an expert at making Christmas trees look absolutely immaculate

Idk if it’s because he’s had to deal with cleaning up disorder for a while now?

Looking at you, ya second year loons

He just has the touch, fam

He’ll of course let you have input on which light colors, what type of ornaments, and so on

But honestly it’s really fun seeing him fully concentrated on making your tree the best it can be

He lets you on his shoulders to put on the tree topper 🥺

For his gift, Ennoshita really loves books, so you decided to get him 12 different (hardcover!!) stories — one for each month in a year

Along with a small sticky-note blurb on the covers of each to explain why you chose it, and to give similar title recommendations if he ends up enjoying

He was so surprised with how thoughtful and extensive it was

Loved it so much that he immediately started to read the first one, with you sat in his lap

“Chikara, you realize you’re meant to start this one in January?”

“Shh, I’m getting a head start”

[pinkykitten]

the princess and the villager

- anonymous what up oreostars, if this isn't too specific i was wondering if u could write a one-shot about sokka (atla) noticing he's in love with reader when he sees her playing around with some kids and maybe confessing? i love a fluff lmao

pairing: sokka x female! reader words: 1,691 genre: fluff, comedy, one-shot, romance, requested

a/n: i hope this is what u meant lol, he has been my childhood crush so this ignited a flame again hehe, also pls check out my oc of atla named jia.

“And the beautiful princess was caught by an ugly witch. Since the princess was the most stunning girl in all the land, the witch wanted that beauty for herself. She was going to cook the girl in a stew and eat her all up.”

They all gasped.

“But the villager boy wanted to save the princess so he went after her. He saved the princess and they lived happily ever after. What she doesn’t know is the princess saved the villager boy when she said I do,” Sokka smiled wide as he looked in the distance to see you helping the older folks fish. You were his princess and he was your villager boy. Seeing you at his home made him feel the butterflies in his stomach and his cheeks grow hot. He had always had a crush on you ever since he said hi. He felt like you were the only one that understood him and made him feel like he could do anything. He trusted you with everything. 

In the tent, all the children circled around Sokka as he told his fairytales. It was their favorite time to listen to princesses and princes and dream in their tiny, wild, minds their imaginations. A child raised her hand. Curiosity gleaming in her eyes. 

“Yes?”

With some teeth missing, the little girl said, “Sokka, who is that princess you’re talking about?”

Sokka stumbled over his words. Why was her nervous about this question this little brat asked? It was only a child! 

“That’s because Sokka has a crush,” one boy stuck his tongue out, disgusted. The little girl chuckled, twisting her hair, in love with the romance. 

“No I don’t,” Sokka argued back to a short 5 year old. He was ready to lay hands on a child. “It’s just a story, that’s it.” He stomped his foot.

“Sure,” the little boy rolled his eyes. “I might have been born at night but not last night.”

Sokka eyed him up and down, “you sure about that.”

“Hey guys! What’s going on over here?” You shook from the cold, blowing hot air into your hands. 

The little boy was about to say something but Sokka covered his mouth with a hard slap. His voice was muffled by Sokka’s glove as Sokka chuckled nervously. “The kids were just leaving. These little joy’s.” He gritted his teeth, eyeing the kids. “They are getting a little tired, they may need to take naps.”

All the kids whined and complained. “Well, I have an idea. I was going to say how about I teach the kids how to make the bracelets with those colorful beads. I think they would really like it.”

The kids fist bumped and cheered. “I don’t know, they might eat the beads,” Sokka replied. 

Everyone paused and glared at Sokka. 

“I think they’ll be fine,” you kneeled down in the snow, in front of the little girl. “What do you think?”

The little girl giggled, “I want to do blue because that’s the princess favorite color.”

Sokka almost shouted at the kid but you gave him a questioning look, “what princess? What is she talking about?”

Sokka knew your favorite color was blue and he had told the kids that. I guess they figured out that you were his crush. He needed to think again whenever he spilled the beans about his love for you. “I don’t know,” Sokka pushed the kids out of the tent. “These kids I think have been eating too much fish.”

“You kids go on ahead to the tent, I’ll be with you all in a second,” you warmly smiled. You pulled on Sokka’s sleeve and Sokka felt he was about to melt all the snow there from his body heat. “What’s up with you? You seem so squirmy today.”

“It’s nothing, might be I’m constipated.” Sokka blinked wildly. Why did he say that? He needed to learn to shut his mouth and not say everything that came at the top of his head. 

Suddenly, you bent over, laughing hysterically at his reply. “Sokka I love you so much.” You patted his shoulder. 

Sokka gave a stupid, love-struck grin. It sucked though that it was a I love you but in the friend zone. 

As your beautiful e/c eyes looked into Sokka’s, Sokka couldn’t help but feel such an overwhelming amount of love for you. You were a little wet from the snow and waves and seeing you in that state made Sokka question how could you get even more beautiful. It was something impossible but you made it possible. He compared you to a flower in at all times a flower was beautiful so were you. He chuckled as he saw sprinkles of snow laying atop your head and nose. How could you be so cute?! Sokka pulled you closer and flicked the snow off your head and rubbed it lightly off your nose. Your eyes landed to where his hand was at, cross-eyed, unknown to you. Sokka smiled seeing how adorable you were. You were like his little snow angel. “You got some snow on you.” He brushed it off and tickled your nose. You hated your nose but to Sokka it was perfect. “There we go,” he said as he got the rest off. 

You played with your fingers, trying to look everywhere else except at him. “Thank you.” Your body wiggled from the cold air and you wrapped your arms around your body to keep you warm. “It’s so chilly.”

“Here, I got you,” Sokka brought you to him and embraced you into his warmth. “Is this better?”

You hummed lightly at how soft his furs were and the warmth that held onto you. You closed your eyes, enjoying the feeling. He smelled so heavenly even though Katara can argue with that. She always said how he smelled like he hadn’t taken a shower in years but to you he had his own distinct smell that comforted you. 

“Um Y/N, are we going to do the bracelets?” One child came in, grossed out by your interaction. 

Startled, you kicked Sokka away and ran to the tent, shouting on your way, “who’s ready kids!”

Sokka fell back onto the snow, rubbing his behind. 

The kid laughed, “she got you good.”

“Oh that’s lovely sweetheart,” you praised the young girl as she added different shades of blue to her bracelet. It was such a blessing to you to interact with all the children. They made you laugh, smile, act and think like a kid. You felt you could do anything when you were with them. 

“H-how about mine?” One of the kids lifted his up. “It’s all the colors of poop.”

“Oh,” you had a loss for words. “How pretty.”

A child raised his hand in the air. 

“Yes?”

“I gotta go pee.”

“Oh dear,” you couldn’t help but chuckle. What you didn’t know was far away Sokka couldn’t help but see how you were with the children. He imagined himself if you and him were together. You would be the best mother ever and he day dreamed you with his children and how amazing that life would be. He felt he would be the luckiest guy on earth. How understanding you were with these children and patient made him think about his mother. Your elegance, grace, beauty, and how loving you were reminded him of his mother. He felt if his mother were here right now, she would be proud of him. Seeing you play with the kids and make them smile made him love you even more, if that was possible. He knew what he had to do that day, he just had to do it in a certain, special way. 

Sokka saw you stood up and take one of the kids away, probably he had to go pee. Now was his chance. Sokka sprinted to the kids tent and sat with them. 

“What are you doing Sokka?”

“Alright kids I’m gonna say this once and only once. I want to ask Y/N to be my girlfriend.”

The little girl gasped, “you are going to confess your love to Y/N?”

“Actually, yes, wow you’re good. I need you’re guys help though. Think you can help me?”

The little girl smirked and crossed her arms, “we thought you’d never ask.”

“I feel better.” The boy came running to you. 

“You are too much,” you patted his shoulder as you two made it back to the tent. As you rounded the corner everyone yelled out surprise. 

“What?” They gave you a jump scare. Sokka was standing in the middle of the group of kids. His smile was wide and you looked above him to see a banger with black paint on it. You looked to see that the children must of made this because they had black paint all over them. The little girl ran to you and handed you the bracelet. Your eyes made their way to what it said on the banner and you read it out loud, “Y/N,” the children all started trying to stifle their cute giggles. “I love you with all my heart, will you go on a date with me?”

Your mouth dropped open, shocked. You made your way to Sokka, grabbing his arms. “Did you make this?” 

Sokka put his forehead against yours, “yeah. You’re my girl. I can’t help it, I’d fallen in love with you. You’re so amazing and you’ve made me see how incredible this world can be. When I’m with you, I feel like I can do anything. I am such an idiot for not asking you this earlier but will you be my girlfriend Y/N-” Sokka was cut short because you pulled his furs to you, joining your lips with his. You kissed him passionately, so much that his leg lifted up full of bliss. 

“So is that a yes?” He had on a goofy grin.

You kissed his forehead, “absolutely.”

All the kids groaned, some gagged, the little girl fawned at the love she saw. 

“Wait,” the pee pee boy stopped the celebration. “So you’re saying this whole surprise wasn’t for me?”

a/n: that kid is so me omg, he is such a mood. reading other ppls fanfics tho inspire me and help me to not get writers block so i got some inspiration from my recent readings. 

[morkofday]

2020 – a (content creator) year in review

I decided to make this into a mix of these two games I was (kinda?) tagged into so thank you for @leonzhng and @tiesanjiao ♥ I hope you don’t mind me doing it like this ^^ all the questions were just so interesting that I wanted to try!

(bc of the amount of questions, I’m placing them under a cut so that I don’t flood anyone’s dash) 

Me

(this is the 2020 year in review that hanyi tagged me to ♥ sorry am so late!)

Top 5 Movies you saw this year

wow tbh I didn’t watch many movies this year as I realized yesterday when I was thinking about this for certain reasons. Or at least I feel like I didn’t watch that many? Nothing really stuck with me it seems.

Because of this, I will only mention two: Parasite and The Old Guard. Those were both wonderful in their own ways and I’m very happy I got to watch them both ^^

Top 5 TV shows you watched this year

this one is difficult bc I watched so many (and forgot even more?) but:

The Lost Tomb Reboot (my introduction to DMBJ. this drama stole my heart and helped me through the tough autumn semester!) 

Joy of Life (it’s nuts that this happened during 2020? it feels like it was ages ago)

Kingdom (such a positive surprise and I really hope we get more of this :o I really recommend!)

Detective L (easy, nice aesthetics, amazing costumes. Bai Yu was a delight as Luo Fei)

Sand Sea (I am still baffled by how much I loved this bc I had so many doubts? am happy I did tho)

Bonus: Guardian (bc it has come to stay and the rewatch has been so emotional but so rewarding)

Top 5 songs of 2020

this is a tough one too bc I’ve heard so much new music during 2020 but I will try to put it simply:

Black Swan by BTS (I absolutely adore this song. I listened to it on repeat when it came out at the beginning of the year, I have cried for it a ton, I enjoy every stage I see for it and it’s just a masterpiece. it has also helped a bit with my writing struggles that I’ve felt creeping up on me lately)

Always by By The Coast (an amazing song that always leaves me in my feels. inspires me a lot all the time)

Love me or Leave me by DAY6 (this whole album was a masterpiece and I listened to it on loop for like. two weeks? this was my favorite song on it even if I adored the rest too, especially Zombie)

all of my life by Park Won (listened to this a lot in relation to my xicheng and the wedding I finally got to write for them ;; that’s one good thing that came out of this year tbh)

雨人 by 刘畅 (Liu Chang) (with the Reboot’s ending song, this one is my favorite on that ost. I love Liu Chang’s voice, I loved Liu Sang as a character and as I said, I loved Reboot as a drama. I get super emotional about this ost so I think it defined this year a lot for me)

Top 5 books you read in 2020  

All For The Game -trilogy (listened to these as audiobooks but that counts right?)

The Song of Achilles (as an audiobook too and really adored the reader’s voice)

The Smoke Thieves -series (I really just binge read the two first books in this series and am so excited for the next one!)

Call Down The Hawk (love love love)

Guardian novel (am not very into these novels usually but I was positively surprised this time? it was so cool to finally get the original story and compare it with the drama version)

5 positive things that happened in 2020

joined mdzsnet and met all the amazing ppl there and got to become part of this loving community and :’) I’m so thankful, it’s been a joy

learned more about editing? or started doing it regularly. I still can’t do shit but am having fun learning more all the time and I really hope that maybe the upcoming year I can switch to PS and try out giffing?

went to Halsey’s concert! it was in february so a bit before all the hassle with covid happened over here ;; it was super cool and so nice and I just. I love Halsey

fell into the DMBJ hellhole which am very much enjoying. it’s a great universe and the story is so good and the dramas have been so fun to watch and. it feels like a good continuation to The Untamed somehow haha (also brought me a new friend! you’re amazing ashen!! ♥)

started therapy and it’s been... a journey. but towards something better I think? it’s something I would’ve needed ages ago but it’s better late than never I suppose

My Creations

(this is the other part where ali was being super sweet and mentioned me ♥ thank you for being so awesome!)

1. first creation and most recent creation of 2020: wow it’s been a while since I’ve looked at this horrible creation but here ya go jkdhgk [x]. I’ve come a long way from this (and my xicheng has come a long way from this too). most recent one is this xiaoge edit that I absolutely adore [x]. 

2. one of your favorite creations from 2020: this wwx edit that was part of my agust d2 edit series [x]. I loved to give him blue instead of his typical red. 

3. a new style you tried this year and a gifset edit that uses it: this [x] wwx edit which I don’t know if I like or not but I was playing around with the font and all the effects instead of just normal screenshots + coloring. also I just adore the quote. 

4. a creation to be proud of: I could mention that xiaoge here but in addition, I will also say this wu xie edit for reboot [x]. I managed to capture my vision so well, I was surprised. for cql, this songxiao edit [x]. I loved how it turned out in the end. 

5. a creation that took forever: this wangxian edit [x]. like I’ve said several times, I lost sleep bc of it. I just kept struggling with the third pic and how to place the text there D: 

6. your creation from 2020 that received the most notes: this lwj/wangxian edit [x]. I had many ideas for this edit when I first started making it and I never managed to capture my vision in the way I first intended... the pictures I was supposed to use just never fit quite right sigh. I dunno why it was this one that gained all the notes in the end bc I personally think I have better ones too but am still thankful :’D 

7. a creation you think deserved more notes: as said, dmbj fandom on tumblr is very small so I really want to say the two already mentioned ones (wu xie and xiaoge) and then my pingxie edits [x] [x]. also these wwx edits which I personally am very happy about [x] [x]. and from my agust d2 series, this yun bros one [x].

8. a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it: really just dmbj this year and I’ve already linked all of my creations for that :’D tho I have plans for another pingxie edit and a liu sang edit! oh and maybe I could mention guardian here with this shen wei [x]. I had so much fun while making it (also the quote just haunted me relentlessly until I gave it a moment). 

9. a creation you made that breaks your heart: this must be my easter islanders (lwj and jc) edit [x] that just. awoke many thoughts in me? I’m going to put a link to the version where you can read my ramblings underneath :’D 

10. a ‘simple’ creation that you really love: my creation for the creator (gif?) challenge that was going around! [x] it was simple and nice to do and I loved the result. also, it was nice to work with jl for a change :’) 

11. a favorite creation created by someone else: oh wow ok so this is going to be rough bc I have so many favorites ;; you can look at this post here [x] to see more! 

but to love my two taggers am going to say these [x / x] [x] [x] [x] [x] by hanyi (I always love your edits, the colors you choose, the thoughts you put into them (and your humor too!). there are so many cool things you’ve done that I just stay in awe of! I adore all of it ;; ♥) and these [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] by ali (I love all of your gifsets so much, they have such pretty colors and such good scenes, and I am thankful every day that you make all the amazing dmbj content, pls never stop ;; I should go through all of your creations properly one day! I noticed you have sand sea stuff too and let me scream?) ^^ ♥

12. your favorite content creators and blogs that you appreciate: this is going to be a huge list and I’ve already made my love heard for some but no hurt in doing it again so @i-am-just-a-kiddo @ashenwren @tiesanjiao @kholran @lzswy @englishbunnyrocks @leonzhng @aheartfullofjolllly @yibobibo @inkblue-black @cross-d-a @bloody-bee-tea @fytheuntamed @mdzsnet @lifegoesmon @creeds-eagle @underaswift-sunrise @sarawatsaraleo @lan-xichens @mylastbraincql @wangxianbunnydoodles @manhasetardis @distantsnows @ohsehuns @minmoyu @linglynz @highwarlockkareena @yiqiie @aowyn @alienwlw @wangxiians @kingbadcat @sassyassassy @tytangfei @lanzhannnn @skzmxtp @leoyunxi @yoonqiful @softjeon @rapbabenamjoon @ronan-adam @miyakuli @pavusdorian @arsuf @brolinskeep @gawincaskeyy and so many others! (sorry for all the random ppl on this list that I’ve never even talked to ^^’ just know that you make my dash a wonderful place! ♥) 

I won’t tag anyone separately here but everyone who’s already been tagged or sees this is free to do this (or link me posts if you’ve done these already!) ♥ have a nice day everyone! 

[t-lostinworlds]

Extra (Tom Holland)

A/N: What is this? I have finished something? Me?? posting?? A FIC? WHAT? Is the world actually ending!?!? I think I’m funny but I’m not, clearly. Glad to be out of my writing rot tho aha. Hope you guys like this one!

Pairing: Tom Holland x Singer!Reader

Summary: You get a sweet but very extra surprise on your birthday nearing the end of your show.

Warnings: Fluff and my usual typos

Word Count: 5.5k+

Masterlist in Bio

-:-:-:-:-

The sound of your phone just going off uncontrollably was what woke you up, and you were completely sure that it wasn't your alarm.

You squint your eyes at the bright glare of the screen, a huge contrast to your still dim hotel room. You literally had just woken up hence why the curtains aren't open yet, it's still a bit too early after all.

Flicking the ringer on silent, birthday greetings and messages from friends and families were still flooding through, your phone now vibrating instead of your loud ringtone, giving your ears a break.

As you read through and responded to all of them, you couldn't help but feel a little down after you realized you haven't seen his name yet.

Of course you feel grateful for all the sweet messages everyone has sent you, your heart is melting from all the love. But there's that slight disheartened feeling that you can't seem to shake, slight worry that your boyfriend might have forgotten about your birthday.

You haven't heard from Tom since yesterday morning, which now makes it almost a full day. After he texted you that he was going to be doing a lot of stunts and is probably going to be super busy, he then just disappeared, not even slipping in a text good night. You did let it pass though, because he might have been quite knackered after the shoot.

Message to Tom: Good morning bub <3 Just checking up on you since you haven't read or replied to any of my messages at all. Hope you're okay and haven't injured yourself Thomas. I really miss you a lot and I love you loads x

Your frown could only deepen as you hit send, still no response nor any sign that he's got your messages whatsoever.

Normally, it wouldn't really be a big deal but the last you've seen him in person was three months ago. He was busy shooting the third installment of Spider-Man all while doing a few projects on the side. And you, well, you're touring around the world.

You could be patient and blame it on the time difference why he hasn't greeted yet, but he's just behind a couple hours. Tom has made it a habit of always greeting you at midnight no matter what and where, he's just cliché like that, and it was definitely passed midnight in New York.

God, you sound so much like a whiny and ungrateful brat, but you can't help it, you just miss him so much.

Maybe you've gotten so used to always spending your birthdays with him so the first time that you're celebrating it from different parts of the globe, it does makes you sad.

You did try to make ends meet, but a week before today, he's brought you the news that he can't fly out due to conflicting schedules with some of the actors he's working with, and that it's critical that he's there on the day. To be the leading role of a gigantic movie, asking a few days off is never that simple.

On the other hand, you have a show today and tomorrow, so flying to him isn't exactly ideal either. You understand of course, you are sort of in the same line of work, but still, it doesn't make you feel any less gloomy.

With one big stretch, you placed your phone back on your side table as you slowly got out of bed, opting to go and take a shower to then head down and meet the crew for breakfast.

Maybe you'll hear from him later in the day.

* * *

It was late in the afternoon and still not a single word from Tom.

You were growing worried because it was so unlike him to be very cut off and silent.

Did he lose his phone?

You tried to contact Harry—who's with Tom currently—but he too wasn't responding. Everything was just off and odd altogether, the tiny pit in your stomach only growing bigger the more you worry and think about where your man is.

"Have you heard from Tom?" You asked with furrowed brows the moment Molly, your manager approached you on stage. Your hand found its way to fish your phone out of your pocket to check it for the umpteenth time, but still, no sign of him.

You were finishing up your final soundcheck before you were off to a mini get-together—snacks and drinks included—with some of your fans. It was your alternative to a meet and greet because you'd rather hang out and have real conversations with them than the whole quick snap and go.

She shook her head at you all confused, a slight glimmer in her eyes that you didn't quite catch. "Uh no, why?"

You sighed. Tom doesn't really contact your manager unless its important matters, so you don't even know why you're asking, maybe you've just grown desperate to hear even the smallest thing from him, just anything. "Never mind. Is it time?"

"Yeah, they're all waiting for you."

You simply nodded as you followed her off stage, handing the guitar over to your guy on the way.

Walking through the hallway, you kept your head down, eyes glued to your phone as you respond to more messages from people, but also checking if Tom has come back from ghost town.

You were aimlessly following Molly to wherever room or space they set up the get-together in, just watching her shoes and never looking up from your device. That, until you heard a few shuffling of rushed feet and a door being slammed shut.

"What was that? And what's in here?" You asked, eyes now trained on a door of what looks like another dressing room. Molly continued walking, so you kept following but with your gaze still glued to the door, curios as to what's going on inside because you definitely can hear a bit of ruckus.

"Oh just the staff, that's one of their rooms." She answered casually, not even bothering to give you or the room a glance.

"Is it weird if I just go inside and say thank you? Would that be too... intrusive?" You pondered, halting in your tracks as you contemplated on knocking. You just wanted to extend your gratitude for all their hard work, but you aren't sure if they were comfortable with you suddenly just strolling in.

"It's not weird at all hun, but you've got a schedule." She smiled at you sweetly, nodding her head towards the direction of the get-together.

"Oh right, yeah, let's go."

You gave the door one last look before turning on your heel to follow Molly once again, up until you reached another space covered in curtains. And the moment your bodyguard pulled it open, wide smiles on faces greeted you as they all sang in tune.

"Happy birthday to you!"

You laughed as you shyly shook your head at them. Warmth coated your whole body in an instant as love and pure adoration radiated off of the space, off of your fans.

You did as much as wave your fingers in the air as they sang, serving as a conductor because for the number of years you've been on this earth, you still have no idea what to do when people sing the birthday song to you.

* * *

"I can't thank you guys enough for being here with me tonight. You guys have been so incredible, you always are." You breathed out as your voice echoed throughout the whole arena. You looked at the thousands of people who came tonight to see you perform with a proud grin, their energy never wavering as they sing your songs back to you from each melody to lyric.

Adrenaline was pumping through your veins as you tried to catch your breath, taking the water bottle off of the floor and lifting it up to your lips to have a quick drink.

"Now, give me everything you've got for this last song alright?" You spoke into the mic once you've rehydrated.

"Wait, wait. Don't you guys agree that Y/N is killing it tonight?" Your pianist, Sara, interrupts, the crowd cheering in agreement at her input. "And judging by today's occasion, I think we all owe her a little song." She added, earning a hearty laugh from you as you brought the mic back to your lips.

"You guys don't have to—"

"Happy birthday to you!"

The song was played no matter your protest, Sara leading the crowd as she plays the tune on her keys, the rest of the band following suit.

Your laugh bounced off the walls as you stood there in complete awe. It was a beautiful sight to see, the crowd all singing in unison, lights up in the air as they pour all their heart to the simple yet special song. The song still filling you up with joy and warmth despite having heard it countless of times for the whole day, and the fact that all these people were there for you? It was definitely the icing on the cake.

"Thank you so much you lovely people, y'all are making me emotional. And they say the best way to spend your birthdays is with the people you love and the ones who love you, and they were absolutely right. I'm so blessed to have you guys tonight, because I do love you all very much." You stated fondly the moment they finished with a loud cheer, a hand placed right atop your heart as you feel it grow ten times its size.

"Y/N, we've got another something for you." Sara spoke before you could even get another word out, hand gesturing towards the large screen right behind you.

"Oh god, is this mission make Y/N ugly cry today?" You laughed, turning around just in time too see the tour artwork turning pitch black to then be replaced by a huge countdown.

5... 4... 3... 2... 1...

The crowd roared in delight as Mr. Niall Horan joined with Lewis Capaldi appeared on screen, large pints of Guinness on hand with their arms around each other as they give you their birthday greeting.

"Happy birthday Y/N! But since we're halfway across the world, we'll be there with you in spirit. Also, Lewis and I decided to celebrate anyway so cheers to you and have an amazing day." Niall chuckled as he lifted his beer up. "I'll make sure to have a good drink for you Y/N! We miss ya and we love ya!" Lewis added with a cheeky grin, and you couldn't help but shake your head at the two with a big smile of your own.

You've worked with them both on a few songs, and both were the funniest yet sweetest gentlemen you've met in the industry, especially when you put the two together.

Both of them emptied their glasses as they bid their goodbyes, Niall's loud laugh echoing throughout the arena when Lewis spilled before they disappeared on screen.

The crowd went even louder once Shawn Mendes' pretty face appeared on it next, sporting his usual bright smile as he gave you his short but sweet greeting. "Happy birthday Y/N! Wishing you all the best in life since you deserve all of it! Can't wait to work with you again soon! Have fun on your birthday honey!"

You shook your head in disbelief. An amused smile was plastered on your face, still unable to fathom that a few years ago you were a huge fan of him. And now you can say you've worked with him, even call him a friend. Funny, how the universe works.

Alessia Cara came up next with a smile, wide and bright, you're heart melting to see one of your greatest and closest friends. She's just a pure and kindhearted soul, a rare beauty. "Hey there you lovely and amazing woman! Happy birthday! I miss hanging out with you a lot but I shall see you soon! Keep conquering the world Y/N! I am so proud of how far you've come and you deserve every bit of success that comes your way. Again happy birthday! Have an amazing one and I love you!" She blew you a sweet kiss and waved you goodbye, tears already brimming in your eyes at all the love and appreciation thrown your way.

Next were Zendaya and Jacob Batalon, who you've grown close with through no other person than Tom. Both were clearly on set sitting on directors' chair in their characters' outfits. Both looked a little tired but they still greeted you with wide smiles nonetheless.

"Happy birthday Y/N!" They screamed in unison. "We wished we could be there with you to celebrate your birthday but you already know how these things go." Z pouted, Jacob copying her as well and you couldn't help but giggle. "But soon when we get a break we will catch up and celebrate your birthday." Jacob added with a knowing grin. "Anyway! Duty calls so enjoy your birthday and have great one! We love you!"

Then friends and family came up on screen, ones who you've missed most having been away from them for so long and that's when you felt your heart ache a little. Happy tears were brimming in your eyes as each of them shared their lovely messages, saying how proud they are for how far you've come. And when those words come from the people who you truly care about, it means the absolute world.

The next person to share their video message didn't help with the tears either, a hushed sob escaping your lips the moment you saw his familiar face.

The crowd behind you screamed at the top of their lungs the moment Thomas Stanley Holland appeared on screen, handsome face sporting that sweet and charming smile as he sat in his trailer wearing his Spider-Man suit.

"Hello darling. My love, I'm so gutted that I'm not there so celebrate your birthday with you. If I could teleport myself by your side right now, I would in a heartbeat, but anyway, happy birthday sweetheart!" Tom exclaimed joyfully, grin all beaming and you couldn't help but miss him even more.

"Oh, where do I start? Well, I can start by saying how proud I am of you, so so proud of the gorgeous, powerful, strong and successful woman that you've grown to become. You've worked so hard to get where you are today and it fills me with so much happiness knowing that you're out there traveling the world and doing what you love the most." The crowd cooed at Tom's sweet words, your heart was already melting at the seams as more tears threaten to spill, and he wasn't even done yet.

"You deserve the whole world if not more with how kindhearted and compassionate you are. And gosh you make me feel so happy and loved. I feel so lucky to have someone like you in my life, I can't even begin to describe to you exactly how much, and if I tried? Then we'd be here for hours on end. And lastly—because I'm being called to set right now, if I wasn't I'd be talking about how amazing you are some more—I am truly, madly and deeply in love with you Y/N. You are my world and I hope I make you feel loved every single day, because you truly deserved to be."

"Tom they're waiting for you."

"Yeah, just one more minute." Tom calls out to someone off shot before his eyes landed back on the camera, staring straight at you through the screen with a guilty smile. Guilty because it pains him that he's not there with you. "I love you dearly, and I miss you so much. I'll make it up to you I promise. Once again, happy birthday to my beautiful girl and I shall see you soo—"

All of a sudden the screen went static, Tom's words being cut off as you heard nothing but white noise. Then everything just went black, the whole arena dark as the night as gasps of surprise and screams of panic echoed throughout its walls.

Tell everyone to stay calm Y/N, we're fixing things up.

Your sound guy spoke in your in-ear. You nodded despite the fact that they probably can't see you due to the darkness. Turning back around to the audience, you spoke into the mic. "I'm sorry guys, just technical difficulties. Just stay in your seats in be calm, the lights should be back on in a minute."

And as if on cue, the crowd screamed as the power turned back on. However, after a few seconds, they turned unusually rowdy, too rowdy for it to be only that reason. Slowly you got the feeling it wasn't only because of that, judging by the volume and power of their cheer, and by a few fans pointing at the stage as if they're seeing something you aren't.

For a split second, you met eyes with Molly who was right by the side of the stage. She had that all-knowing grin on her face as she pointed towards something behind you.

Confused, you turned around, jumping in sheer shock when you were met by a hanging, upside-down person dressed in a red and black Lycra suit, face all covered with a mask making the identity of the person pretty much unknown.

Your heart beat quickened as you stumbled back on your feet at the sight of the person, your brain registering it back to a specific boy—one who you saw on screen minutes ago wearing the exact same outfit—even if there was no confirmation as their face wasn't even shown. Your whole body was trembling from surprise, excitement but also worry that it might not be who you think it is under that mask.

Emotions were all over the place as you stared right at upside-down, masked-face of Spider-Man who held a birthday cupcake in hand.

"No, no, stop, please, is this a prank?" You croaked out, shaking your head as tears started to escape your eyes, question a must because you're having a really hard time believing what you're seeing.

It's been a long day, you just really wanted to make sure that what's happening is real and not just a figment of your imagination. You had to make sure that it wasn't the desperation of you missing your boyfriend painting pictures in your head. Not only that, but to really be sure that it's actually him under that mask.

"Guys! Don't even play! Please don't get my hopes up. That's a stunt double right?" You asked into the mic as you looked at your band and the rest of the crew for answers, who gave you nothing but wide smiles. You just feel like it would be too good to be true, and you really don't want to face disappointment if it wasn't him.

On the other hand, out of all the things they could have done to prank you, why would they choose this? It's a bit cruel to prank someone on their birthday now doesn't it? Especially when it involves playing with their emotions?

Unless, it's not a prank at all and you're getting way too ahead of yourself.

Mr. Spider-Man beckons you over, finger pointing at your hand to which you held the mic. With tears already clouding your vision, you moved closer slowly.

Reaching a close enough proximity, you had one hand over your mouth to silence your whimpers as the other lifted the microphone up to where Spider-Man's mouth is supposed to be. And the moment he spoke, you've lost any sense of control over your emotions or your sanity, his voice just too familiar for it to be someone else's.

"Why don't you take off the mask and find out yourself darling?"

You shook your head at the upside down boy as joyful tears streamed down your face, shaking hands lifting up to hook your fingers on the edge of the mask, pulling it down and removing it fully to reveal the face of the man you love.

"You sneaky bastard." You laughed tearfully, Tom only grinning at you all proud, his face now turning redder as the seconds pass by, being upside-down and all.

"Happy birthday sweetheart." He chuckled, offering you the cupcake, which you took gladly, balancing it with the mic on your hand. You were unable to form any more words as you stared at Tom, still unable to believe that it's actually him, and that he's here, in the flesh.

The crowd started to chant the word "kiss" over and over, making you throw your head back in pure laughter.

"We should do the kiss." Tom wriggled his eyes brows at you, mischievous smirk in play and you couldn't stop your eyes from rolling at your boy. But still, you gave in anyway as you cupped his face softly, your heart skipping a beat at the feeling of his warm skin against your palm.

You brushed the tip of your nose with his with a hum, moving closer until there was no space between you two as you captured his lips in yours, all while trying to manage the whole upside-down situation.

Tom sighed in pure satisfaction to finally feel your lips on his after months of being deprived from it, your touch making him feel like he's floating, which says a lot given the fact that he was already hanging mid-air all while being upside-down.

The kiss didn't last long though, too many prying for you two to cherish the moment. The crowd, on the other hand, cheered in amusement at the extremely cliché but sweet gesture, you and Tom giggling between the kiss at the loud support.

"Okay, I'm actually getting dizzy now." Tom laughed once you pulled away, hand gesturing for you to move just a little bit farther, and when you did, he flipped himself right-side-up with ease. A few guys then rushed on stage to help him with the wires, and once they were off, Tom turned to you with a sweet smile, face coated with wholesome contentment to finally see you in person again.

"You're actually here." You whimpered, fresh tears wetting your cheeks some more once he stood right in front of you.

"Aww darling, come here." Tom cooed with a soft chuckle, arms wrapping around your frame as he held you close to his chest, pressing a sweet kiss on top of your head. You couldn't contain your sobs as you buried your face on the crook of his neck, the smell of his perfume filling you up quickly and it only made your grip around him tighten.

You just miss him so damn much, and to actually have him here on your birthday, to be holding him so close after months, it was making every fiber of your being emotional.

"I haven't missed your birthday, not a single one, ever. Why would I start now?" He whispered against your hair, swaying you from side to side in a comforting manner, a soft sigh coming out of you as you felt your heart grow with even more love for this man.

"I still haven't decided if I hate you or love you for doing this." You giggled with tiny sniffles, pulling away to get a proper look at his handsome face, the face that you'll always be glad to see. Hate because he almost gave you a heart attack and for making you worry about him for being gone for a day, and love because, well, he's here now isn't he?

Tom only shot you a wink. "I'll tell you all about it later." He says, hand reaching down to take the microphone from you.

"Hey everyone, I'm Spider-Man." The crowd roared at that, Tom laughing in pure glee, all proud of his choice of words as he slings his arm over your shoulder and pulled you to his side. "I just want to thank you guys for supporting this amazing woman right here. I've been watching the show from the very start and you guys have been incredible."

Tom turned to look at you lovingly, smile coated with delight and adoration, voice layered with nothing but certainty. "I love this woman a lot, so thank you for making her dreams come true and for making her happy."

With just that, you were able to conjure even more tears as you looked at Tom all adoringly with a small pout. The boy stared at you with just as much love, cooing at your reaction as he gave you a soft kiss on the forehead.

How have you managed to get so lucky?

"Right, I'm done crashing your show so take it away my love." Tom finished as he handed the microphone back to you. Giving you one last warm squeeze and a peck on the lips to match, Tom was then waving goodbye to the audience and disappearing side-stage to watch the rest of the show.

Taking in deep long breaths, you turned to the audience with a laugh. "Okay, wow. Mission Ugly Cry is a success then. I haven't see him in months okay I couldn't help the tears."

"I wasn't expecting that at all as you can probably tell by my reaction. How am I supposed to top that now?" You rubbed your temple in feign worry, the audience cheering you in mere support.

You were still sniffling from all the crying along with your throat being little dry. And you were thankful for waterproof mascara otherwise you would've looked even more horrifying.

"God I'm such a mess, can I have some tissues please?" You asked, looking around the crew for help as you attempted to wipe off the tears with your fingers.

Instead of the staff, Tom ran back out with a box of tissues and a bottle of water in hand, making you shake your head in utter hilarity at how corny he is. You couldn't hold back your laughter when he handed you the box of tissues, pulled a couple pieces and held his fingers under your chin as he wiped your tears for you, all gingerly as if he was retouching your make up. After that, he opened up the water bottle to help you drink, then fixed your hair up jokingly and squeezed your nose playfully right after.

Once he was done with, he gave you a chaste kiss on the cheek, waving one last time at the crowd before returning back to side-stage.

"My new assistant everyone." You joked, keeping your eyes on your boyfriend with a grin you can't seem to wipe off. Tom mirrored your expression as he gave you two thumbs up in support for the last song, and with that you turned back to the crowd with a deep, satisfied sigh.

"Right, let's go out on a high note."

* * *

"Absolutely killed it." Tom praised, engulfing you in a warm embrace the moment you got off stage, a soft thank you coming out of you as you squeezed him back.

On your way back to your dressing room, You kept each other close, his arm slung over your shoulder with yours around his waist as you walked through the hallway.

"I'm not leaving your side by the way. I missed you too damn much and I'm not going to waste any second by being a little far from you." Tom shot you his best puppy dog eyes combined with a cute pout, a sweet giggle escaping your lips that made Tom's heart melt ten times over. "Well, I'm not complaining."

It wasn't that long of a walk from the stage to your dressing room but you had time to kill, so you turned to look at your man with a curios glint in your eyes.

"Tell me how you've managed to pull off this extremely over-the-top surprise? I mean, you could've just showed up in my dressing room and I would've cried just as much." You pointed out. Not that you didn't like what he did, you loved what just happened, every second of it, but you cannot deny that what he did was as extra and cliché as one can be.

Tom shrugged with a chuckle, "I know. But I wanted it to be special, you deserve nothing but. And you've got to admit, dangling upside-down in the middle of the stage during your show, all while dressed as Spider-Man is pretty impressive. Plus, we did the kiss. I'd say it's an amazing birthday surprise."

"It is amazing. I just happen to forget how extra you are sometimes." You teased. "I am, but you love me for it." Tom retorted back with a smirk, causing you to roll your eyes with soft laugh.

"Yeah, I do. Thank you so much bub, you always make my birthdays memorable." You sighed, wrapping both your arms around him with a smile full of gratitude. Tom planted another kiss on your forehead, a bright smile on his lips to match yours as he hummed. "Anything for my angel."

"Now, details Holland."

"Right, managed to pull some strings a a week ago and was able to ask few days off, so the whole conflicting schedule wasn't entirely a lie but it wasn't as serious as I made it out to be. Flew out last night right after the shoot. I couldn't handle just lying to you which is why I didn't respond to any of your messages in case I slip up. I'm sorry about that love."

"And then out of nowhere I thought how awesome it would be to pop up as Spider-Man in the middle of your show and do the famous kiss, so I asked Marvel a favor and thank goodness they let me borrow the suit. Called Molly to tell her about my plan, she helped quite a lot. Arrived here earlier this morning, did a test run with the wires and all that while you were still back at the hotel. Changed into the suit to then wait for the time. Oh! And if you actually looked up from your phone earlier down the hall on your way to your get-together, the whole surprise would've been ruined."

You gasped as you smacked his chest lightly. "That was you! I knew something was up." You felt really played, knowing you could've seen him if you did as much as peek up from your phone. But then again, it would've ruined the whole thing, and you really don't want to change anything that has happened today, so you're glad you didn't.

Tom could only laugh at your reaction, giving your pout a sweet peck before continuing. "The video messages were planned a long, long time ago but we made a few edits at the end of my bit to make it dramatic and here we are now."

And just as he said those last words, both of you now stood in front of the door of your dressing room. If there's one thing you always tend to be surprised about Tom, it's his impeccable timing.

"You are something else Thomas." You gushed, referring to today's escapade and just in general. You really are so lucky to have someone like him in your life, so thoughtful, caring, kind and just all around amazing.

You don't really know what came over you but the moment he opened the door to your dressing room and are your way inside, just knowing that you two were finally alone, you grabbed him by the back of his neck and pulled him down, crashing your lips on his as you pushed him back against the door, closing it shut in the process.

Tom chuckled lowly at the sudden change in mood, hands taking home on your waist as he relished the taste of your lips, one he's missed so bad.

The thick fabric of his suit was starting to irritate him for he just wants to feel your skin on his fingertips, especially after so long of not having to touch you. It got on Tom's nerves even more when he felt it grow even tighter than it already is.

And when you started to nibble on his bottom lip as your hands inched down his body slowly, Tom groaned, pushing you away gently, just for a little room to breathe. "Darling, it's very uncomfortable, borderline painful when I get hard in this suit, you know that." He grumbled, brown eyes a shade darker as his grip on your waist tightened.

You giggled, recalling all the times you've teased him whenever you came to visit him on set. "Hmm, let's get you out of it and go back to the hotel then."

Tom's bottom lip got caught between his teeth at your suggestion, your insides churning as he looked at you lustfully, a deep rumble erupting from his chest when he said,

"We definitely should. After all, this isn't the only surprise I have in store for you sweetheart."

-:-:-:-:-

Like & Reblog if you enjoyed and let me know what you think! <3

[cdyssey]

“Lyra’s Jordan” Reaction:

Hello!! I just recently got into the His Dark Materials series, and now that I’m almost done with the The Subtle Knife, I wanted to start the first season of the show! It caught my eye on Tumblr and made me want to start the books in turn. I’ve heard such good things about the series, and I’m keen to see what it does with this gorgeous world of Pullman’s.

DJDJS, nooooo, not the expositional text scrawl. I get it. You have to introduce people to this world, but still.

OH, it’s Asriel, Stelmaria, and Lyra!!!!!

Aughshsh, baby Lyra smiling at the Master. 😭

Lmao, the canon of Asriel literally just dropping his baby off at a college is objectively the funniest thing in the world. The Master is just like, Wtf? What is wrong with you, man? (To which the right answer, ofc, is a lot of things.)

OH, Dafne Keen is already everything I’ve ever wanted in a Lyra adaptation. Playful, witty, adventurous, (currently) carefree. The type of girl who has no qualms playing with a skeleton’s bones.

And I’m also really glad we get to see these shots of Lyra and Roger playing together. It feels like such a real childhood friendship.

Ooooooh, the show’s letting us see what Asriel’s up to even when Lyra’s not around, which I think is a great move. In the book, Asriel really only showed up at the beginning and end, so having some extra content to help flesh out his character is nice.

Whoa! The title credits and score are so pretty. They remind me of the ones from The Crown.

The Librarian’s fond smile at Lyra when she says please is wonderful. And then she yeets out JSJSJSJSJS. Perfect Lyra.

“The retiring room is expressly forbidden!” / “Not for family reunions.” SJSJSJ.

The Master’s hand shaking as he pours the poison into the Tokay. 🥺

They did such a good job capturing Stelmaria’s air of elegance and regality. I love her VA!!!

God @ Asriel pinning Lyra down. You suck. When I was reading the book, I didn’t know what to think of him until this precise moment, which shaded all my impressions of him from there on out.

(Holistically, tho, I actually do love both his and Mrs. Coulter’s characters. They’re both stunningly vile, but Pullman invests them with such interesting nuances that they’re genuinely two of the most electric characters in a series full of electric characters.)

God @ Lyra rubbing her shoulder after Asriel lets her go. Worst. Father. Of. The. Year.

“I’m sure he had a good reason. To be honest with you, if I were him, I would be afraid of me.” / Huh, I don’t remember if these lines were in the book, but the self-awareness here is really interesting. Asriel knows that he’s playing with dangerous fires, and he’s still doing it anyway.

That sweater on Asriel? And that little gray curl in his hair? Hot damn.

A subtle worldbuilding detail that the show was spot on to pay attention to is how all of the Scholars are essentially old men.

Between Asriel and Dr. Malone, Pullman really understands how much of academia runs on asking for grants hahahaha.

OH, MY GOD. IS THAT MA COSTA.

SHE’S SO WARM AND LOVELY AND OH MY GOD. BILLY. HE’S SO SMALL. JESUS.

And the inclusion of this little coming of age ceremony is beautiful. 😭 The Gyptians are so wonderfully communal.

BILLY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭.

Aufh, Asriel carrying a sleeping Lyra to bed. That’s so soft.

Ur still a shitty father, tho.

But you’re a nuanced man, and I appreciate that.

Lyra waking up and smiling gently in realization. Asriel untying her shoes. Oh, my g o d.

“Can I see the man’s head?” / “No, why would I let you do that?” KWEODIDJ.

This Master and Librarian conversation has me tender. They both care for Lyra so much.

Lyra desperately pleading for Asriel to take her with him. 😭😭 And Asriel’s response: “I am sorry, but I just don’t have time for you right now.”

GOD.

“Did it look like this?” / “What?” / “The airship that my parents died in.” / “No. No, it was smaller.” Jesus.

Something that got me from the books, and that gets me here, too, is that the adults in Lyra’s life had had a similar refrain. “A college is no place for a child.” “The North is no place for a child.” And because these are the only paradigms that Lyra knows, whether through experience or imagination, the most consistent lesson that she’s ever been taught is that there is no place where she belongs.

JOHN FAA!! I love him.

And man, I’m really appreciating the way the show is paying close attention to the Gyptians, who are marginalized in their world. The way that they’re organizing to look for Billy just has me feeling some type of way.

OH? Lord Boreal!!??

“That includes her.” IT’S TIME.

I’m not going to lie. The Tumblr gif that got me interested in the series was a set of Ruth Wilson acting her ass off, so I’m ready to be hurt by her in so many more ways than one.

LMAO, this evil theme at her power walk entrance. Perfect.

The golden monkey!! He looks so deceptively cute here.

It is insane how much Dafne and Ruth weirdly favor each other. If you told me that they were really related, I’d actually believe you.

Thinks about how this is the first time Mrs. Coulter has seen her daughter in, like 12 years.

Also, ooooh, the Master in the background is intently monitoring the conversation because he knows how significant it is, and ofc, he’s absolutely wary of Mrs. C.

She’s so soft-spoken here. 😭

AUGH, and her reaching up to briefly stroke Lyra’s cheek.

“You feel utterly alone. And you feel utterly... magnificent.”

Lyra’s wide-eyed adoration of Mrs. C breaks my heart. It only makes the revelation of her true nature all the more awful. Though she doesn’t know it at this point, Lyra looks up to both of her parents, and both of them so completely fail her.

Wow, in the show, is the implication is that Mrs. Coulter gets Roger kidnapped because Lyra talked about him to her??????? Brutal.

OH, GOD. RUTH WILSON’S FACE AT LYRA UNRESTRAINEDLY HUGGING HER FOR THE FIRST TIME. THE SURPRISE, the CONFUSION, the TENDERNESS.

Roger. 😭

Ma Costa sobbing and Tony hugging her oh my g o d. I’m upset. It is no coincidence that this scene almost comes directly on the heels of the Mrs. Coulter/Lyra hug. The juxtaposition is bonechilling. Mrs. Coulter is partaking in the joys of motherhood for the first time, and Ma Costa is contending with the grief of missing a child directly because of everything that Mrs. Coulter is doing.

“Lord Asriel himself brought it to the college when you were just a baby.” Cue the Master and Librarian smiling fondly at their little Lyra, remembering. 🥺

Lyra frantically shrieking for Roger stings. The show did an excellent job of capturing their friendship—honestly, better than the books I would argue.

“BECAUSE YOU’VE BEEN A GOOD AND STRONG MOTHER TO HIM, MAGGIE.” I’m crying a little at this line because my name is Maggie, and so now I love Ma Costa even more if that’s at all possible.

John Faa’s casting is pitch perfect. He’s authoritative and stern but so caring and compassionate at the same time.

In an alternate universe, Mrs. Coulter and Lyra track down the Gobblers would be such a badass plot line.

“We’ll have plenty of time to discuss whenever you wish.” Wow, this line echoes Asriel’s from earlier: “I am sorry, but I just don’t have time for you right now.” But the irony is that they’re both saying nearly the same thing. Mrs. Coulter may say this, but she absolutely doesn’t mean it.

OH, the complexities here!! The monkey noticing that Lyra shoves the alethiometer deeper into her pocket, Pan noticing the monkey growling, and then Mrs. Coulter looking up. Such quick but charged moments.

What a magnificent first episode. I’m already hooked.

[theholycovenantrpg]

CONGRATULATIONS, LIA! YOU’VE BEEN ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF RAUM.

Admin Jen: Where do I even begin, Lia? Where do I even begin. Your app caught me by the heart the exact same way that Raum has gone on to covet and capture hearts of her own. I think she’s an easy character to undermine when you consider her underlying sentimentality, but you brought her to life in her viciousness and softness alike without letting one of them overshadow the other, and it’s exactly what I’ve envisioned for Raum. Your writing sample in particular was an utter joy to read, as it perfectly showcased that duality, and not only that but it also captured so many crucial aspects of Raum, all tied together in one amazing, heart-wrenching scene. Please continue breaking my heart with her -- I’m begging. Please create and send in your account, review the information on our CHECKLIST, and follow everyone on the FOLLOW LIST. Welcome to the Holy Land!

OUT OF CHARACTER

ALIAS | lia

AGE | twenty-two

PRONOUNS  | she/her

ACTIVITY LEVEL  | i’m a full time graduate student, so tuesdays and thursdays i’ll most likely be completely absent. other than that, expect me to pop in throughout the week. i can get kind of distracted ngl thx adhd

TIMEZONE  | pst

TRIGGERS  | REMOVED

HOW DID YOU FIND THE GROUP?  | i think i know the admins from somewhere i don’t rlly remember tho

IN CHARACTER

CHARACTER | raum, raym, räum — "space, room, chamber"

there is no grandiose tale to accompany raum's arrival in hell. there had been no rise and no fall— her state of existence could only be likened to tabula rasa, a blank slate, wholly unaffected by a past that was just out of reach. the sum of her existence had been hell and hell alone.

 lucifer and lucifer alone. he would never fail to remind her of this. the ceaseless parading of this fact, the whispers, the chilling reminders— all in his attempts to compel her into compliance— and appreciation. perhaps he once sought a more extraordinary use for her. perhaps he'd fallen victim to his own ego, an ego so inordinate that it left nearly every crevice and corner of hell untouched. perhaps he'd convinced himself that raum, empty and unaffected, could be fashioned into the quintessential soldier. re-education was often half the battle, so was raum not the ideal starting point? 

while raum held no memories of her prior existence, she'd grown to understand that it was not emptiness that festered inside of her, but absence. she was aware of the memories that she lacked. the knowledge that something was being withheld from raum made all the difference. it gave her something to chase. it allowed her something to fixate on and covet. she knew something had been stolen from her. she was not the vacant expanse that she'd been made out to be.

this was before it all. before heaven. before samael. before eve. before caphriel.

raum— who could lay no claim to an origin, no family, surname, or inheritance— had silently been offered a choice in who she would serve first and foremost— lucifer or herself? 

it was easy to choose herself. if she had nothing at all, she had herself and the lack that existed within her. this much she knew, and what she would carry as lucifer banished her to the outskirts of hell to keep guard. finally— raum discovered something akin to recognition. 

the darkness, the chasm where hell stopped and nothing began— would be an inscrutability that she recognized within herself. for the first time, raum would come to see the darkness as a possibility— as potential. she'd been a canvas stripped away of its imagery, painted over to be made blank, but the job had been executed poorly, and traces of what once existed in bits and fragments just outside of her reach. 

raum, who possessed no right of her own, would invoke her abilities to lay claim to the belongings of others. she began filling herself, the unoccupied room, with any or everything— as long as it was not hers. soon, she would make a collection out of borrowed memories, jewels, and hearts. even the slightest pang of jealously drove raum to action. 

yet, what use was filling an empty room with items that don't belong to you? items that don't have that same familiarity or ownership that comes with the rightful acquisition of something. and most of all— she could never figure out how to obtain what she coveted most of all. the things should could not have became what she desired most.

identity. belonging. purpose. history. 

—nevermind that, though. damien had anointed her in the flames of the new testament. he’d deemed her his vice of envy, and breathed purpose into her hallowed existence. but what of her past? what of the demon who would swallow heaven in its entirety, even if it devoured her in return?

WHAT DREW YOU TO THIS CHARACTER? | where do i even start?!?!? raum was the first character i fell head over heels for. even as i considered different possibilities, i always found myself right back on raum’s bio. she’s absolutely chaotic to her core, and i adore her all the more for it. from the contempt that took hold of her the moment reached hell, to her almost neverending pursuit of what she believes is owed to her. lucifer had done something unforgivable— and that was stripping her of her personhood. this created a gaping chasm, one she would silently resent him for even in his absence. what i find so fascinating about raum is how young of a demon she is how she deals with the insatiable longing festering within her— how jealously and greed exists in every aspect of her world— even in in her relationships with the few beings that she cares about. she is unapologetic of her possessiveness. she is unafraid to make what she wants known, and unafraid to pursue what she wants. she is fiercely loyal, and it is not easy to gain her trust. while some people wear their hearts on their sleeves, raum cuts a piece of it out for every person she comes to love— if they first offer her a piece of their heart in return. she possesses a passion that’s unmatched, emotions that are not regulated nor fully understood. i would love to bring this agent of chaos to the dash.

WHAT FUTURE PLOTS DID YOU HAVE IN MIND FOR THIS CHARACTER? |

from eden / few mortals have captured raum’s attention in the way that evangeline trame has. she is one of the several beings raum covets, and the only other mortal who'd successfully ensnared her attentions— with the first one being eve. nonetheless, raum wants more than anything for. evangeline to become one of her agents of chaos. she reminds the woman that they share more common ground than she may have liked. she also has a sneaking suspicion that the woman might be eve— this is a dynamic i'm very excited to see play out. will it be a game of cat and mouse? cat and cat? she promises evangeline everything she's ever wanted, but how much trust can evangeline put into the jealous demon? how can she prevent herself from falling victim to raum's tempestuous envy? raum is careful not to underestimate a powerful woman, and i'm excited to see how raum's pursuit of evangeline plays out. 

to be alone / samael had been the first being raum intertwined her existence with as. though it is samael who is her foundation— it is caphriel who is her mirror. she shares raum’s deep, inexplicable yearning for something they’d been denied access too, even if they couldn’t be anymore different in that regard. nonetheless, raum would like more than anything than for caphriel to belong to her— in the way samael has professed his belonging. when raum realizes that caphriel has changed him in ways she does not understand, when she realizes that something shared between them, something she is inevitably left out of… well, will derail her sense of self, as dramatic as that is. this is a triangle of chaos that i am excited to explore. will raum succumb to her jealousy, doing everything in her power to drive them apart? or will she come to accept their acquaintance for what it is— embrace it even? this is something i would discuss and plot further with the players, but i’m quite excited for it!

someone new / i want raum to gradually unravel the threads of her existence, but at a cost. what if raum were to discover that her past was not grand in the way that she desires if it does not fufill the emptiness permeating through her? this will be fun to play out on the dash, because there’s no telling when and how a memory will be triggered within her. i saw this as something that would occur sporadically, but eventually i imagine raum growing weary of the unintelligible fragments. she’s already pursued heaven, and who’s to say that she won’t search for answers in other places? perhaps she’ll seek out the priestess for the hundred eyed god, orias, or even caphriel. there’s no telling the lengths she will go to discover herself, and i am excited to play this out, especially as she grows increasingly restless and desperate in her attempts.

ARE YOU COMFORTABLE WITH KILLING OFF YOUR CHARACTER? | yes. my only stipulation is that she learns the truth of her existence beforehand. 

IN DEPTH

DRIVING CHARACTER MOTIVATION | the very absence that raum seeks to eradicate is the entity that operates her in her every waking moment. she wants more than anything to grow into her newly ordained role as vice of envy, but she cannot forsake her past and propel herself to the future like she truly desires. having been so close to heaven once, and now being so far, has only caused her fixation with the angels, and their potential associated tenfold. it is important that the distinction between admiration and fixation are made. between longing coveting. it is not love or hope raum sees when hers eyes linger on an angel for a moment too long. it is some parts greed, and every part jealously. they had what she did not— an entire world that was made without her in mind. what was not to want about that? raum’s adoration in heaven lies in her attraction to what is not hers. the farther the divide between her and the objects of her affection, the more she yearns for it. she is the vice of envy after all— and not an inch of the world will be left unaffected by her plundering.  

Character Traits | 

DEVOTED, PASSIONATE, INQUISITIVE

VINDICTIVE, POSSESSIVE, VOLATILE

In-Character Para Sample | TW DEATH

his hand did not leave the caress of her cheek as he met her forehead with a pillowy kiss. he could feel the entirety of her face turn upwards in delight— a faint blush now visible across her face. eye contact was barely broken, if only for a few moments as if they could not bear the sight of the world without confirmation that the other was there. delight and laughter capitulated through him as she recalled a fond joke, or perhaps a silly memory involving the two of them. nothing else mattered in that moment. not the drizzling rain, or the worn umbrella that was doing a half-assed job at shielding them. nothing mattered when love swelled their entire beings. 

raum watched with a curious expression at first. she was familiarizing herself further with the couple seated directly across from her, through a hardened, yet almost inviting gaze. perhaps raum had not been friendly, but there was something about her curiosity that roused something recognizable in others. perhaps this is why the woman’s eyes lingered on raum’s a moment too long. or perhaps it had been her staring at them for an extended period of time. 

he plants a kiss to her damp palm.

as she routinely twists the rings that line her each and every finger, raum can feel the curiosity gradually drain from her body, leaving something far darker in its wake. lazily, it begins to expand in her veins— outstretching itself like a lazy feline— finding comfort in the absence that occupied her every edge and crevice. it then begins to suffocate nearly every inch of her, twisting her heart and mind— her stomach now heavy and knotted. she draws the cup shakily to pouting, and downturned lips, eyes never drawing themselves away from the couple now in a loving embrace. 

there was no pulling away now, no denying the familiar covetousness that blistered her heart. invisible, excess envy brimmed at each of her edges. soon, raum’s envy would become no longer just a raum problem…

unblinking, she watched as the stranger told a story she could only make out parts of, as she began to center her envy in her core. nothing else in that moment occupied the chasm of her mind. not heaven. not samael. not her eve. not hell. not damien, lucifer— or even caphriel. not the sweat that began pooling at her temples, not the smudging of her lipstick on the brim of the coffee cup.

 it was her and her alone.

her heart, more specifically. raum could sense the goodness within her, the unbridled and unpolluted love. the woman had been sure of herself in ways that she was not. she’d been sure of herself and sure of her love— something raum could never begin to understand. she had been a being created for chaos— not a human free to pursue their heart’s desires. in that very moment, that woman possessed everything raum did not have. her grip on the coffee cup tightened, her lacquered hand offering no mercy to the now empty, suffocating coffee cup. had they’d ever been doubtful in their love? it did not appear so. how foolish of them to put so much stock into something as temporary and fickle as human affections.

but why had it been them? why had raum not been her? her body hummed faintly with something terrible, something wicked— something undetected by the naked human eye.why had that not been her? why had what they had not been hers? questions of why occupied her mind. questions she could no control, questions that threatened to burst from her at any moment. if she’d been human, her heart would’ve surely exploded. no other thoughts allowed her a clear exit from this newest fixation. it would take action to free her from this condition, from this longing that threatened to drive her to the brink of destruction. it would consume her if she did not consume it. if she did not feed it. and raum was never one to be consumed by another. 

as the coffee cup drifted from her palms, and as raum’s eyes drifted shut, she relinquished all control momentarily to her greed…

it was if raum momentarily exited her body and into the body of the woman. she felt everything she felt, even her subtle resistance, but she knew better than to get caught up in the inner workings of a mortal. that was how she tended to lose focus, and suffer the loss of an object. it did not take long to find her vivacious heart. raum wondered if the people she stole from truly understood what was occurring while it happened. she wondered if they truly understood that they’d fallen victim to the vice of envy. how much every object meant to her, despite how disposable she’d treated the people she’d acquired them from.

she’d uncovered her heart. a heart the woman had no intention of parting with, but whose intentions and needs fell on deaf ears. there was only one way to escape raum when she’d reached this point. diverting her focus or utter resistance was difficult for the mere, average mortal. even with all the love in the woman’s heart, even with her not being ready to let go of the man before her, she lost her will to fight at every moment. death had come for her, in ways she did not yet understand, but perhaps she would soon. her love had not been enough to save her. his love had not been enough to save her. 

there’d been no blood in raum’s acquisition, no visible marks left in her wake— only a woman now motionless in the man who’d once caressed her cheeks arms. his pleas, his panic, his perplexion all meant nothing. deep, wounded sobs wracked the entirety of his body, while a foggy, almost drunken haze settled within raum.

her love had not been enough. the temporary high had settled into a residual no. her love had not been enough. it was never enough because it had not her love to have. 

disappointment ushered through her veins. one of the stranger’s sobs had been particularly earth-shattering— not enough to draw attention from the empty expanse, but enough for raum’s eyes to flicker from the shadow that caressed her.

had she ever known that sense of loss? she had no way of knowing whether or not she’d been familiar with an unexpected loss. he’d now resorted to attempting to carry her body around the perimeter, searching for someone— anyone to restore his lost love. he paraded his lover around for a white flag— completely unaware that she’d was the most recent victim to the vice of envy. little had he known, but his pleas were no longer falling upon deaf ears. 

raum, finally rising from the shadows, approached the pleading man, who now was on the floor attempting to resuscitate his love. it was not pity she felt in that moment. if she ever did feel pity, it was immediately replaced with something more rotten, and she could feel the envy bubble within her once more. she was tired, but not exhausted enough for one more acquisition. 

she longed to feel the sense of loss he felt. the recognition that existed in his loss— one that was not present in her lack. though she’d lost her memories, it was difficult to mourn when being unable to pinpoint exactly what she wanted to mourn. how she longed for her sadness to be given direction. how she longed to have a specific entity to pour her grief into.

she drew closer to the man, lowering herself to his level, with his sobs eventually quieting as he met her gaze. 

i can make it all go away.

he was silent for several minutes before turning back to raum with a face sullied by grief. he would accept her offer.

part of her wondered if he wholly understood what he was agreeing to. if he truly understood the entity that hummed before him.

a cold palm extended itself, meeting the outline of his chest, and moments later, he would collapse alongside his love, his heart now entirely in raum’s possession. 

if only he understood that her love would have never been enough, she thinks as she wearily rises to her feet, beginning the trek back home, leaving the bodies to be discovered by someone unexpected.

samael would not believe her when she told him of the two hearts she’d stolen.

Extras | 

(NO GRAVE CAN HOLD MY BODY DOWN / I’LL CRAWL HOME TO HER) » SAMAEL 

in the beginning, there had been raum and raum alone. of course, there’d been lucifer, but she held little regard for her reviver. she had no intention of regarding him as her creator. even when being faced with the illegible chasm of her mind. there was purpose in the absence he continued to instill in her. if she could not remember a life before him— then that meant life was meaningless before him, for what use did she have of a life she knew nothing about? an intangible world that she only knew existed because of the lack it left her with— an emptiness she’d grown so familiar with. it was the void that never abandoned her; it was the absence she learned and grew to understand. it was lucifer’s omission that she could comprehend, far better than raum could even begin to understand another demon, with the shadows coming in a close second. and so, it was never raum and the demons, it was never raum and lucifer because she never belonged to them— not to him. that is why samael would become her fulcrum of time— why she conceptualized her existence as life before him and life with him. before samael, she recalls nothing— nothing of importance for that matter.

 there were the angels, but they were not hers, heaven was not hers, and she’d arrived at no real solution in her pursuit. what she could not have quickly took a back burner to what she was able to acquire. freshly fallen, with an unmistakable sense of shared loss, it would still take raum several months before she eventually materialized as more than a shadow in samael’s vicinity. inquisitorial to an almost meddlesome degree, she had no way of knowing her scrutiny would warp into something more— into something entirely separate from her fixation with heaven. it was with samael that raum would come to understand what it meant to belong to another being. before him, raum only knew what it meant to covet the possessions of others, whether it be material goods, or a sense of wholeness she could not achieve. she knew how to conquer and consume, but not how to give— never how to belong.

 she would joke about stealing his heart, or possibly an eye or two, and samael would remind her how fruitless this pursuit would be, a complete and utter waste of energy when he already belonged to her in his entirety. although, she was free to knock herself out, idiomatically and literally, as that would require a significant amount of her powers, causing an energy shift that made her tired to a humanlike degree. raum would roll her eyes in what had become routine between them, and her stubborn silence would become reminder enough that she belonged to him. 

EVANGELINE » (HONEY, YOU'RE FAMILIAR, LIKE MY MIRROR YEARS AGO) 

from eden did eve's aura rise, and in the crevices of raum's mind she would remain, sheathed in the carefully constructed shadows where memories once ventured. the universe offered her glimpses of something otherworldly— a being so splendid that raum could not comprehend them in her current condition. raum was first met with her divine fragments as she maneuvered through the dark pockets of the mortal realm. was it by chance that raum focused her sights on evangeline? or had their encounter been woven into the stars, as decreed by the cosmos? or was it because everyone who'd been in their way was now dead? no longer was lucifer or god there to regulate their memories for their selfish gains. 

raum knew this— evangeline knew this too. something shared passed between them as their eyes joined. it took only a split second for her to decide against taking anything from her familiar. so much had been taken from them already; she could not bear to see evangeline parting with anything else. not before finding what she was in search of, at least. raum needed the mortal woman as whole as possible— if she wanted to stand a fighting chance at discovering who she really was— whether she’d really been eve. her eve. with each encounter that followed, the mutual ground seemed to increase tenfold. in evangeline, raum recognized a profound chasm; insatiable covetousness left in place of her memories. a desire for something that could not be acquired on a quick whim, something not satisfied with material or capital gain. what raum promised was identity. recognition. this is what she continued to make known to her, through their sporadic encounters— though raum was always cautious about the practiced amount of distance she set forth between them. it allowed her the upper hand, but patience and discipline had never been her strong suits. the more she comes across evangeline, the greater her fixation becomes— as does the urge to unearth what's been kept from her for all these centuries. 

what could it possibly be that neither of us were meant to see? evangeline asks as raum's eyes drink in her bronze visage, reeling in her fascination to momentarily ponder a potential response for the mortal's question. i can't give you a specific reasoning unfortunately, raum utters as she frustratingly scans the fragments of her memories for the 1000th time. but why has always been fairly obvious to me. the knowledge we possessed posed a threat to their power structures. and two powerful men couldn't have that, now could they? a triumphant smirk coasts across raum's curious expression. nevermind them though. most kings get their heads cut off in due time. 

pintrest: https://www.pinterest.com/BLACKISMS/r-a-u-m/

[romanianseba]

Little Princess

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader

Summary: Small car ride with your little family.

Warnings: all the fluff in the world

Word Count: 1,256

A/N: Got inspired by seeing a little girl wearing makeup haha. I love Sebastian so much. He's seriously 'best dad in the world' material.

—

"Daddy, have you seen my makeup today?!" You heard your daughter say from her position on the backseat when you climbed on the passenger seat.

"Wow, sweet pea, you look like a princess!" Sebastian beamed a big smile at her through the rearview mirror from his spot on the driver seat.

"But it's just a little bit." She told her father with her sweet voice.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yes, because I'm so young."

"I see. But you're the prettiest baby girl." Sebastian said with a wide smile across his face, turning a little on his seat to face her.

"Thanks, daddy." Your daughter said with a sweet little voice and you glanced over just in time to see her getting all flushed and wearing a timid smile over her dad's compliment.

Smiling, you felt your heart swell at their exchange.

"Ready?" Sebastian asked and both, you and your daughter, nodded, smiling at him before he started the car and drove it away from the house.

"Do you want you juice now, baby?" You asked, looking back at her.

"Yes, please!" She responded, making grabby hands at you.

Handing her the juice box you told her to be careful and she nodded obediently.

"Isn't she too young for makeup?" Sebastian asked you in a low voice when the car stopped at a stop light, while your daughter drank her juice and absently tried to sing along the lyrics of the song playing on your Spotify playlist.

"Of course she is." You chuckled. "Did you really see any makeup on her tho?"

He chuckled slightly. "Not really. But I'm a man. We tend to not catch on those things."

"Yeah, well, I did put some eyeshadow on her eyelids but is barely there. I knew she would be satisfied with the slightest bit of color. She begged me for days, Sebastian. You have no idea."

He laughed and shook his head in amusement.

"I told her this isn't going to be happen again in a long time tho. And she agreed and understood." You explained.

"Daddy! Do you think Prince Bucky would take me to his castle if I wear makeup?"

You and Sebastian bursted into laughing when you daughter asked enthusiastically.

"Oh, he sure would, princess! But guess what?"

"What?" She questioned with wide and curious eyes.

"He would invite you to his castle even when you're not wearing any makeup, sweet pea."

"Really?" She asked hopefully.

"Of course! You're a princess! With or without makeup."

While she smiled timidly again, Sebastian glanced at you, amused when he realized you kept laughing about your daughter's current obsession. She loved Bucky Barnes and one time, while you were watching Civil War with her, she pointed out Bucky looked like a prince because he has "prince hair!" and since that moment she has referred to Bucky as Prince Bucky much to yours and Sebastian's entertainment. Now Sebastian would make up stories for her about Bucky being a brave hero/prince, saving princesses and having his own enormous castle. She would listen in awe as her father narrated the story, squealing everytime she heard about Bucky's metal arm and she would claim to not be able to sleep without his daddy telling her about the 'Adventures of Prince Bucky'.

"She's so in love with Bucky." You shook your head, still laughing a little bit.

"Just like you." Sebastian reminded you.

"Yeah. But for different reasons." You whispered teasingly.

He looked over at you, quirking an eyebrow. "Are you referring to your metal arm kink now?" He said, making sure only you could hear it.

You hummed, pretending to think about your answer. "Not really, I also love him for his royal appearance." You laughed some more.

"And here finally I was going to ask the Russos if I could bring the arm home but I guess..." He signed and shrugged.

"Please do." You said a little to quickly making him laugh.

"So desperate." He mumbled, a smirk playing on his lips.

"When I visit Prince Bucky in his castle we are gonna drink tea and..." Your daughter started to voice out her thoughts, interrupting your teasing competition and then she made a pause. "Does he like tea?"

You looked back at her and shrugged. "Maybe he does. What do you think?"

"I think... Oh! Daddy is Prince Bucky! He likes tea. Daddy likes tea." She confirmed.

"Yes. Bucky absolutely loves tea." Sebastian confirmed. "He would drink all the tea in the world with you. That would take you your whole lives. Meaning you'll have to stay with daddy forever." He whispered the last part and you smiled fondly at him.

You could already visualize him crying when watching his daughter getting married, or even just by watching her leave for elementary school every morning. He was enamored with her and there was nothing he wouldn't do for her. Watching them bond together everyday was such a blissful experience, something that brought you absolute joy and you wouldn't trade it for anything in the whole wide world. He was enamored with her, and you were enamored with their relationship.

The fit of giggles of your daughter made you come out of your little bubble as you heard her say: "And we would be the Prince and Princess of Tea."

"Yes." Sebastian said, scrunching his nose like he always does when smiling so big. "Look at that yellow bird!" He pointed at the tree in front of the parking spot he was now driving the car in.

You looked up and there was indeed a beautiful, bright yellow, small bird standing on one of the branches of the equally beautiful blooming tree.

"That's mommy's favorite, bug." Sebastian informed your daughter making her look more excitedly at the little animal.

"Ouh! Daddy, It's just like me! It's so little!" She squealed with a bright smile all over her little face.

The smile she got from her father. And that was another thing you were deeply grateful for everyday. Because, when Sebastian wasn't home, you were still able to witness your favorite smile in the world, his room-lighting smile, on your daughter's face.

"Ow. That's a cute one." You commented on the bird, slightly blushing at your husband remembering that little fact about you that you only remember telling him once about.

"You're a cute one." He mumbled.

"Yes, you're a cute one, mommy." Your daughter said from her now standing position between the two front seats and you didn't have enough time to think about how she got out of the security belt by herself before she spoke again. "No! You're a beautiful one. A s-s-stun-...ding one."

"It's stunning, love-bug." Sebastian corrected her kindly between small chuckles.

"Stu-stuuunning. You're stunning momma! Like daddy always says." You chuckled softly as she adorably struggled to get the word right.

Reaching out, you kissed her chubby cheek as she was now leaning over the front seats. "You're precious." You said, squeezing her cheeks.

"Alright my loves, we're here." Sebastian informed, turning off the car and climbing off of it as you started to gather your things.

"When are you going to be Prince Bucky again, daddy?" Your daughter asked, when he opened the back door for her.

"We'll talk about it later, first I want to know why did you get out of the security belt by yourself, lady." He responded, lifting her up and out of the car and you heard her giggling when Sebastian closed the door behind them.

[venus-says]

Aikatsu on Parade! Episodes 14-15

Otome says "POP TYPE RIGHTS!"

I don't really remember why I kept avoiding watching these episodes for the past two weeks, but I'm genuinely happy I did because I had the best time ever watching these two episodes together.

There's not much to say about the two since they were more or less filler and they didn't try anything bold, but much like with its predecessor, on Parade thrives on the more slice-of-live/filler episodes and these two are an excellent example of that. I think on Parade does it even better than Friends because they're not limited to a certain amount of characters so when they want they can put together a good number of interesting idols to interact, have the nostalgia factor play in, and still create a very fun story to just sit down and relax.

And if you're a fan of pop type idols, like I am, these two episodes were an absolute delight.

Episode 14 we had the best Stars unit, Yuzutto Lillie, takeover Ako's tv show having Raki, Honey Cat (!!!), Nina (!!!!), Mikuru (!!!!!!!!!), and even Haruka as support! And gosh this episode was a JOY to watch. Just the fact they brought Nina back was a huge deal breaker to me, I really love her and sadly she didn't get that much time to shine during her season so to me that's amazing. The same can be said about Haruka, I'm not one of her biggest fans but I do think this show has treated her very badly so seeing that they didn't forget she exists somehow brings some peace to my heart. XD

I'm not gonna lie and I'll say that I thought it was a bit weird they brought up Ema's issue with small animals again since to me this was something that she had already got over with, but that isn't a huge problem, the scene was cute, I love that shot they had with her and Ferry so it's all good. Speaking of weird things I also think that the transitions between segments during the show felt a bit awkward at times but I understand that with 3 performances per episode it gets hard to make things feel smooth all the time, again it wasn't a big detriment, I had lots of fun with their segment with the owl and that crazy quiz show that had THE MOST ADORABLE CHIBIS EVER so I'm fine.

Speaking of the performances, I think this is one of the few times where I was okay with the 3 lives format (this applies to episode 15 as well). We got to see You x I again which was something I needed SO BAD after the Let's Find It spam we had in Friends S2, we got to see Nina perform again which is absolutely great seeing she performed only two times in OGkatsu, and I'm always excited to see the best rendition of Animal Carnival being performed (tho I'm not gonna lie I was a bit disappointed they didn't perform in those unit coords they received in the arcade game).

While 14 gave me the most fun, actually 15 was my favorite out of these two.

This was kinda a drama episode with some extra flair to it, it was incredible. I wish we had seen PowaFuwa Dreamin's creation so that this conjunct event didn't feel so detached from everything, but once I got over this it was just a bomb of joy. To begin, they did nostalgia here in a very subtle way, the event happened at the same park where Honey Cat decided to form their unit and Pop'n Popcorn was there to remind us that's a product Otome endorsed before, which I liked a lot I think whatever comes next for Aikatsu they should go by this route whenever they wanna reference past seasons.

We had some top-notch interactions here between each unit that gave another special charm to the episode. Like, Shion went to live like an ear of corn for a day in order to make the popcorn better, it's so absurd it's impossible to not love it! Shion is truly a gem, she deserved so much better. Another very nice thing was seeing the kids inquiring Ako and Kirara on why are they a unit when they seem to hate each other so much, I appreciate a show that has some level of self-consciousness to it and its problems.

also, THEY DIDN'T FORGET BABY PIRATES EXISTS AND THEY PUT THEM HERE EVEN THOUGH THEY DIDN'T NEED TO. T-T (honestly, the life of a Baby Pirates fans is so sad, look at me being so happy with only scraps that they gave us)

But the best thing about this episode was without a doubt the play they came up with, it was so fun and they also showcased the talents of all members of both main units in the production so it was amazing. And of course, the Three Goddesses was amazing. As y'all know I'm not the biggest Pure Palette and Yume fan, but they here acting as superheroes together was perfect. And the performance??? Gosh, that was wonderful, I loved all the effects, the song is pretty good as well, everything there was perfect and I wish we could get more.

As empty as these episodes seemed, they still had good lessons for Raki here which acted as the cherries on top to crown these awesome episodes. In the first we had Raki learning the importance of smiling and wanting to make your audience smile, and in the second we finally saw Raki seeing the value fans have for an idol and this is the thing that made me like episode 15 more than 14. I've mentioned on twitter that Raki had no interactions with fans, all she had was contact so far was with other idols and all she was doing was absorbing experience whenever she went, and I like that the show noticed and mentioned that, of course, this can be just lampshade hanging and the show will move on without touching on this again but these were great episodes and I'm on a very good mood so I wanna be hopeful about it.

And I think that's it for today, as I'm writing this episode 16 has already come out with subs but I haven't watched it yet and since I'm trying to get my schedule back on track I'll release this post as it is and do a separate post for 16. Anyway, what are your thoughts on these episodes? Let me know in the comments. See ya~

[theprettysetterclub]

hi!! can i get a bnha matchup? i dont mind which group of characters, so go crazy with choosing. im pansexual, a little on the taller side (ig thats over 5'6?) im loud and excitable, i like to listen to music so im usually humming or i have headphones in my ears, im literally always hungry so i have snacks on me and i do sometimes share them with others. i like to tell bad jokes that arent funny but people laugh anyway, im kinda touchy? i like to hug people n lean on them (1/2) ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽

i do get awkward when someone initiates the touching tho (if that makes sense??) im the friend in the group that makes sure that everyone gets to talk and will stop someone from talking if they talk over someone else. i am very loyal to my friends and will do anything for them. im blunt n honest when i speak and majority of the times i speak i dont realize that im just rambling my thoughts out and i get laughed at alot but i dont mind bc i like to make people happy (2/2) ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ thnk u!!

omg the lil face,,, everything about these asks is so cute!

i match you with... 

ashido mina! 

✧ listen,,, you guys would be so unbearably wholesome,,, my teeth are rotting just thinking about how sweet you two would be,,, 

✧ most excitable couple! you’re the sort of people that naturally lift the mood of those around you, and i think together you’d create this little whirlwind of joy? your cheeks would always be sore because you can’t help but grin when you’re together. you perpetually feel like your hearts are bursting

✧ i see mina being a big ‘actions’ person, so she’s always bringing you snacks (sometimes, she even makes them for you), recommending you songs, and even just getting you little gifts whenever she comes across something she thinks you’ll like! you guys always end up with a smorgasboard at lunch because you’ve both brought The Most snacks lkdfjslkj 

✧ show her affection and she’ll melt. she’s very attentive and understanding, so she’d know to keep her affection to herself when you first started dating. but she loves it whenever you hug her, or lean your head on her shoulder. poor girl feels like she’s about to explode. she’s quite touchy herself, so you can bet that once you’re comfortable with it, she always has her arms wrapped around you. 

✧ she thinks you’re so funny skljdslk tell her a bad joke and she’ll lose. her. shit. it’s honestly quite affirming, and it’s nice to just,,, keel over laughing with your girlfriend, you know? 

✧ look, this girl absolutely loves listening to you ramble? like she can’t help but just gaze at you so adoringly whenever you’re rambling. she just loves you so much? and somehow, she always manages to get pinker while watching you. it’s incredible.   

�� honestly, she may struggle a bit with your bluntness (her style is just a little different), but she really loves your honesty! she likes knowing how she can improve, and your opinion means a lot to her. she respects anything you have to say, and you’ll often notice that she’s taken any advice you’ve given her. 

✧ oh but she’s always asking you which songs she should choreograph a new dance to! she loves making little dances to your favourites, and she always shows them to you with the biggest smile on her face. she just wants to make you smile, and her heart is honestly so full whenever she hears you laugh. 

✧ you’re just,,, so cute oh my god,,, she’d absolutely adore you, and she’d never let you doubt that! my heart genuinely can’t handle you guys-- 

other matches! 

✧ amajiki tamaki: you sound like sunshine, and tamaki is drawn to that. you can make him smile so easily, even if it’s only small. he finds your humming really comforting? whenever he’s anxious he likes to just lay his head on your shoulder and listen to you hum away. he appreciates that you take the time to listen to him, and give him the time to speak when he needs it,,, he has trouble speaking up for himself, so your attentiveness is a blessing to him. like mina, he loves lostening to you ramble,,, he just sort of watches you with this fond smile on his face. he’s listening to every word, i promise. 

✧ jiro kyoka: obviously, the two of you bond over music! also, i feel like she’s the moonlight to your sunlight, if that makes sense? your energies balance out quite well. she rolls her eyes at your bad jokes, but she honestly finds you quite charming. she values your bluntness and honesty, because she’s the same (and it’s nice to be able to communicate with your partner in a way that’s very natural). she also places great value on your loyalty! your touchiness makes her blush like nothing else though slksdlfkj

[j-ellals]

MERRY CHRISTMAS MERU !  ⋆  (( @solofelt​ )

                                              —   ☆ ☆ ☆   —  

I know, I know, it’s not Christmas anymore. I’m fashionably late, no surprises there. But I thought about it, and I came to the conclusion that New Year’s Eve was the perfect day to post your gift — especially since I know you’ve had it rough recently. I thought that this could perhaps start your year of 2019 on a good note. That, and I’m just really fucking excited to post this drawing AGSJSGSJS.

...Oh damn, where do I start. There are so so so many things I want to write down for you — some I already said, some I haven’t, some I have but don’t remember doing so ( which happens WAY too often; memory, pls do keep up ).

Uhhh FIRST OF ALL, I want to talk about your contribution to this RPC — which is how we met. I wouldn’t be writing this to you if it wasn't for me finding your blog through a promo. Your Gray quickly found his way to my heart — the vast understanding you have of him, the accuracy of your portrayal and your amazing writing & aesthetic making it so that you became, quite fast, one of my favourite usernames to see on my dash. Through you, I became much more attached to his character than I first was. It’s always a joy to write with you, and I hope we can do that more throughout the next year. ♥

AND OUR KIDS, GOD. Together, we built a ship that ( quickly ) rose amongst my favourites. I cannot put into words just how much I ADORE Jellal and Gray and their chemistry. I love exploring all these facets of their bonds, I love exploring their future, I love writing and drawing for them…. but above all, I love that we created this together. Jelray wouldn’t be as wonderful and as close to my heart if it wasn’t for the fact that we wrote them as a team — a good one, might I add.

I’m so, so so glad that we could make them work out on Discord. I love them with all my heart, and I love that you’re just as excited and motivated as I am. It’s amazing. You’re amazing.

     --- NO, SERIOUSLY. YOU REALLY ARE. 

Meru, you’re an amazing writer, a fantastic artist, a wonderful Gray — the only Gray that matters to me — and above all else, you’re an irreplaceable, priceless and remarkable friend.

Over the course of the last eight months, you’ve become my closest online friend, my confident, my safe space. You’re kind, always ready to listen to me rant or scream, you’re understanding, talented, funny, bright and creative. You’re passionate and friendly and accepting. I love talking to you about anything and everything, whether it’s about our muses, our ship, online or irl — and each and every single one of our conversations brings a bright smile on my face.  It’s incredible how easily you cheer me up when I’m feeling down. It’s mindblowing how LUCKY I am to have met you, and everyday I’m thankful for the place you allow me to have in your life.

I also want to talk to you about snow. Snow has been a part of my life in Canada for years, for so long it’s become mundane. You, however, have never gotten the chance to see some — not real one, not in real life.

So to you, I sent pictures of my snow-coated backyard and of snowflakes up close, making me appreciate the beauty of nature’s cold again. With you in mind, I was able to summon the motivation to build a snowman. To show you what it was, I threw myself in the snow to make a snow angel — which I hadn’t done in *years*. To see you admire something I never thought of as exceptional made me find beauty in snow, in snowflakes, in the white winters. Your love for snowy winters was contagious, and it brought back my love for them, which had faded over the years. 

My thankfulness isn’t about the snow, however; this is merely an example. It’s about the place you’ve taken in my life, and the impact you’ve had on it. You made me look at life from a different point of view; you allowed me to find the beauty some everyday things. You’ve given me so much, Meru. You gave me brilliant advice and a shoulder to lean on. You gave me an amazing ship, an amazing writing partner ( spoiler: it’s u ), a precious friend ( spoiler #2: it’s also u ) and hours, days, *months* worth of happiness, of laughter and of INCREDIBLE MEMORIES. You gave me, through your appreciation of my writing and my art, motivation to create and confidence in my abilities like no one has ever done before. *Seriously*, your screaming and keysmashing makes every damn second spent creating something worth the hard work. 

You gave me so much. To know that I can give back even an inkling of the happiness you gave me by bringing even the slightest of smiles upon your face — whether it’s by a bad joke, by creating something or by being myself,,, it makes me so happy??

And can I just add, you’re the first person I feel so comfortable genuinely being myself with? To such extent, without restraint?

To be able to scream and fangirl about my weird special interests without feeling the need to apologize. To be able to confide in my issues and anxiety, to be able to break down and show my weaknesses, to be able to open myself to talk about deep-ass stuff. To be myself, at 100% —— it is incredible to do all that stuff and feel you being so welcoming, so accepting. It’s priceless. It brings tears to my eyes just *writing* this.

Throughout the years, I’ve met many people. Whether it is online or in the flesh, many of them have left their mark upon my life. You, however — I know you’ve left a big one. And while I know that eventually our paths may part ( not soon tho,,, pls ), I will forever remember you, keep you in my memory and be thankful for the amazing presence, friend, confident and writing partner you’ve been throughout my teenagehood.

Because you, Meru, didn’t just become my friend. You became my best one. Distance and age gap be damned, you showed me what a best friend was. Not just the closest kid you hang with in school, no. The real stuff.

You showed me what a real best friend was meant to be, and that spot absolutely belongs to you.

I hope 2019 is good to you. I hope you get some rest and some happiness --- and I hope I can provide some to you as well. 

( *waves a glass of apple juice bc I know you don’t want me getting drunk* )       HERE’S TO ANOTHER YEAR OF FRIENDSHIP.

Merry Christmas, sunshine  ☀️ —— because truly, that’s what you are. You light up my life like a ray of sunlight, you make the clouds part and the flowers bloom.

                                                                  With lots of love, KAAT.❄ *

@solofelt / @w-olfcry

[endwalkr]

this is an ask based thingy but im really in the mood to infodump so im just gonna answer them all under the cut !

Favorite video game?

starting off with the absolute hardest question huh? i can’t possibly name ONE favorite game of mine because i adore my favorites for many different reasons. my overall favorite video game is ffxv or botw. ffxv because it has brought me so much joy for such a long time, and because i have such a connection with the characters. botw because i was actually in the fandom when it first got announced in 2016 so i got to be there when the hype was at an all time high– and finally being able to play the game after waiting for so long was an unforgettable experience. i have more favorite games but ill talk more about them in the ‘’special place in ur heart’’ question.

First console you owned?

my first console wasn’t a console. my friend and i used to play on her nintendo dsi all the time and at one point tiny little me reeeally wanted one of my own so i saved up and got one in [redacted] when i was 7. my first actual console was a wii though, we got that around the same time.

A game that holds a special place in your heart?

ffxv and botw mean the absolute world to me, but super mario galaxy and skyward sword are very important to me too. skyward sword is the game that got me into zelda which got me into anime which got me into final fantasy etc etc etc.  super mario galaxy was the first non-mini game collection and more adventure story-ish game i played. i was so proud when i beat it for the first time and mario was my first ever ‘’fandom’’ :’) 

Favorite video game character?

bro. i cant pick just one so i’ll choose one per game : prompto, ryuji and link. they were all my comfort characters at some point and i projected like crazy onto them. this doesnt mean that i wouldnt absolutely die for noct or zelda. 

Least favorite video game character?

i dont think theres anyone i distinctly dislike? i always talk about hating ardyn but that’s because he’s just a salty bitch. as a character i think he’s a great villain and i rly love him. i honestly always end up liking everyone somehow, maybe there is someone i just forgot about but i cant remember at all. 

Favorite genre?

adventure games, or action rpgs. 

Video game character you’ve had a crush on?

every character ever, but i distinctly remember the moment i fell in love with prompto sjghfkshd i was watching a playthrough of xv in december 2016 because i didnt have a ps4, and the guy got to the scene in galdin quay where the bros learn insomnia fell. i had watched about 6 hours of the game by that time and wasn’t particularly interested in the characters but not uninterested enough to drop it. i hadnt even gotten a good look at the characters faces yet, so when the camera zoomed in on prompto when he said ‘’might not be save for us here!’’ i noticed he had freckles. oh god. oh fuck. oh my god hes fucking cute. oh my god better watch 30 hours of this game now

First video game you remember playing?

wayyy before i got my own gaming systems, my then-best friend had a gamecube in her attic. i was around 5 or 6 at the time. whenever i was over at her house and we didnt know what to do, she’d sometimes propose to play ‘’mario kart’’. important is that we are dutch, and i was a literal child. i thought mario KART meant it was a fucking card game, so i always declined whenever she asked. on one fateful day, i finally gave in and was pleasantly surprised it was in fact not a card game, but a viddy game. so we played mario kart double dash. (…i had never played a video game in my life besides browser flash games and was Very Very bad)

Age you started gaming?

so i played my first video game that i didnt own when i was about 5 or 6. then i got my first supply of games at age 7/8, but i dont really consider that time to be when i started ‘’gaming’’. i’d say that was when i started mario galaxy, so i’ve been playing video games for real (ie. story adventure games with boss battles) for about 6 years now.

Hardest video game you’ve played?

this is gonna sound stupid, but the witcher 3. there’s like 7 difficulties and i played on the EASIEST and still had a hard time, i just couldnt get used to the combat. i had the same problem with assassin’s creed syndicate, but after about 10 hours i actually knew what i was doing, and ive played the witcher longer than that and still am clueless. this is kind of an unpopular opinion but i dont particularly like that game

Video game you’ve spent the most time on?

i guess i am what you’d call a casual gamer; i really like video games but during a normal school week i only game for like 2-6 hours. most of the time i dont play for like 2 weeks if im busy. gaming has kind of taken over my life not because i play so much but because i get so emotionally invested lol i’m currently on summer break and even now im not playing a lot because of exhaustion and executive dysfunction. this derailed slightly but the game i’ve played the most despite my casual gamer status is …. … …. ffxv. surprise, right? the runner up is botw, but xv wins by a landslide. 630+ hours. botw is 350. my main save in ffxv is almost 200 hours i think. damn. i really managed to keep myself entertained with that game… (………i was thinking recently, since the loading screens in xv are so long, how much of this total amount was spent watching screens. i imagine it’s several hours, especially if you fast travel a lot.)

Most embarrassing gaming moment?

many moments in my gaming experience are embarrassing, but a more recent one: i was in xv’s postgame, beating some dungeons on my new save file. i had just finished daurell caverns and hadn’t saved in about 2 hours. (uh oh) i was driving around in the regalia type d and got to the big cliff near lestallum, and remembered someone made a gif of jumping in there so i wanted to try it too. i imagined the game would just put me back on the road, like it does when you crash into something. except it didnt. i got a game over. where was my last save? 2 hours back all the way in hammerhead. yippee.

Scariest video game you’ve played?

i never play horror games, cuz for me games are supposed to be relaxing experiences. no hate towards horror games of course, they just stress me out. the only time ive played horror is when friday the 13th was for free on ps+, and my friends really wanted to play it. (theyre kinda addicted to it now. huh) they had already gotten over the initial fear of having jason chase you, but i was still terrified. i can play the game without getting scared now tho. the horror sound effects just rly freaked me out at first jhsdkghsd

Most memorable gaming moment?

playing breath of the wild for the first time, or beating it for the first time. both experiences were filled to the brim with excitement and nostalgia. seeing botw as a blank slate, a world for you to explore, having no idea where you’re going… that was pretty incredible. now i know every nook and cranny of the map, so i wish i could play it for the first time again. i was so incredibly immersed. beating it was insane. i cried for 30 minutes and the end wasnt even sad, i was just so amazed at the fact that i was really here, playing breath of the wild, it was really real. the fucking main theme in the background (which i cannot for the life of me listen to without crying) didnt help with my emotions sgkdjh

Video game character you wish you could meet in real life?

…………..its prompto again. maybe 2017 me …. was .. kind of a kinnie

PC, Xbox, Playstation, or Nintendo?

i dont care about console wars at all, but i think hardware-wise, pc is the best, because if you have a good pc you can basically do anything. i however do not, so i just play on consoles. ive never particularly liked xbox, so i only play ps4 and nintendo. not the switch though. its kinda petty, but my best friend and i really dont like the switch djghks

Gaming company you’re most loyal to?

none. i used to call myself a nintendo nerd (oh my god…. i m. gonna die) in like 2015 but since the switch came out and since i got a ps4 they kinda lost me. i still like their game series of course, but as a company i don’t care for them. the only reason i see square enix as one of ‘’my’’ gaming companies is because ffxv took up like 70% of my gaming experience, but besides final fantasy i don’t really love them too much either.

If you could only play one video game for the rest of your life, which would you choose?

atm i’m really into ffxiv because theres just so much to do, but that’s just a new, possibly temporary interest. if i had to choose, i’d say botw. maybe i’d say ffxv, but i feel like running around doing nothing in that game isnt very fun, because the world is sorta empty after completing every quest and getting to level 120. in botw, just fucking around on your horse is still really relaxing and nice. 

Do you use strategy guides?

yup. in certain games i try to avoid them but i usually end up stuck or in need of advice. i couldn’t have gotten so many p5 trophies if not for the internet lol

How often do you use cheats?

never, simply because the games i play often do not have cheats. unless im playing the sims and are in need of a motherlode, i dont use them.

Competitive or single player?

single player. im bad at video games and like to do stuff at my own pace. online multiplayer can be fun every now and then in games like mario kart 8 or splatoon, and i also like teamwork stuff like ffxiv or comrades. but ultimately, i prefer playing on my own.

Video game character you want to/have cosplayed?

have never cosplayed, dont have plans to either, but it would be fun to cosplay link. omg. i just remembered i have that fucking chocomoogle shirt… sorry link im gonna slap on some sasuke hair, black jeans and ugly sneakers 

Ever go to a video game convention?

i have not, i have however gone to three (3) video game concerts which is basically the same thing. 

Hardest boss fight you’ve been in?

the hardest bosses for me are usually the ones with a gimmick. you have to use a certain item or tactic to beat them or something. other hard fights for me are when you fight someone with a similar skill set. (in ffxv, this happens twice, once with the iggy-noct sparring match and once against ardyn. somehow, the final boss was easier than getting the prince to eat vegetables.) i don’t know an actual example of THE hardest boss fight ive been in though. at the time, the first bowser battle in mario galaxy was the hardest thing in the universe and i got stuck for like a month. currently, i’m having trouble with the riku-ansem fight in kh1. 

Video game you wish you could burn from your memory?

the zelda cdi games? no, i dont really know. i dont hate a game so much that i’d want to forget about it altogether, but i dont exactly love ocarina of time that much. it hasnt aged well and playing it on the gamecube for the first time in 2015 wasnt a good idea. im sure it was revolutionary at the time, but i cant handle the outdated controls gsdgksjs 

Favorite gaming series?

see, i love ffxv itself more than the entirety of the zelda series, but i dont love ff as a SERIES more than the zelda games. so if were talking series, zelda for sure. i fucking love those games and they mean a lot to me. 

Do you skip tutorials, or find them useful?

i often skip them because i cant pay attention, but then find that i need them anyway. so i usually do skim through them. 

Best online gaming experience?

one really good one happened a few days ago in ffxiv, some guy and i exchanged emotes for like 30 minutes and it ended with us becoming friends on psn :’) ppl dont usually emote back at me in that game so this was really wholesome and nice gjshksdj 

Worst online gaming experience?

i dont really have a worst? theyre more annoying. think try harders in gta online killing you 15 times in a row because they want to show you how good they are or something. magically, online gaming hasnt been too hard on me (mainly because i dont game online that much)

Why do you game?

it brings me joy. it’s a fun way of relaxing, while being stimulated at the same time. games have meant a great deal to me the past 6 years and i wouldnt want to lose them for the world.

[kyunsies]

Mädch darling!!!! 💖💖💖

It's been a minute because I've been having an awful time lately! However!!!!!! I could not sit idly by!!!! So buckle up because I don't know if you're ready for this!!!

First! I love your gifs!!!!! I do!!! They are always so consistently lovely!!! Even if coloring or whatever isn't consistent, the joy I receive from seeing your gifs IS consistent. I'm NEVER annoyed by seeing you post your gifsets. I can always feel the love and joy you put into making them. Especially when you go off in the tags about whoever you happen to be giffing. I love that. I adore seeing you go a little insane about Changkyun (and so does my sister, so that's two, at least).

Secondly! If people are annoyed by your posts or the frequency, that's literally not your fault or your problem in any way, shape or form. It is up to each individual to curate their own experience on Tumblr. It is not your responsibility. Other people's experience on here is not your responsibility. Your blog is Your Space, and you can and will and must do whatever you want with it! Whether your gifs are good (they are) or bad (they aren't), or whether you post too much (not possible) or too little (also not possible), it is not your responsibility or problem if other people are annoyed. I know it can be disheartening if gifs don't get as many notes as you'd hoped, but I want you to know that you at least have one avid fan (actually I can say two fans - my sister also loves seeing your posts).

I hope you know that I LOVE seeing you on my dash. Whether that's gifsets or rb's or text posts or updates or other people's asks (I do read them occasionally), seeing you on my dash always makes me smile, without exception. I do also want to mention I put nearly everything in my queue, so it takes a while for posts to get reblogged sometimes... But! They're there, waiting to be posted.

Anyway!!! I hope your day improves by leaps and bounds today, whether that's by this message or other means (treat yourself? Call a friend? Gif some more?). I really do hope you can continue to do what you love to do without worry! LOL (lots of love) 💖💖💖 dkbtho

hi angel !!!!! i’m sorry i’m getting back to this so late :( i’ve been studying for my second exam of the week tomorrow :’) as always never worry about taking your time replying !!! i’m so sorry to hear you are going through a hard time right now 🥺 everything will end up working it’s way out, okay?

i also want to apologize for …. kinda being a crybaby :/ i’m going to be 100000% honest when i say that even if i were getting 0 notes, i would still be giffing 😭 i love giffing so much and it brings me so much joy . i’m so so proud of the progress i’ve made since the beginning and i’m so grateful for all of my friends who have helped me along the way …. i don’t want to sound like i’m ungrateful or complaining because i understand how annoying that must come across to everyone :( recently i just feel like my content is bothersome ?? idk if that’s the right word but even tho i make gifs because it makes me happy, i also want that happiness to be shared with others too and i just feel like maybe that’s not the case :( tumblr has brought me many great (and honestly some of my worst) online experiences ever and i wouldn’t trade it for a thing . but when you’ve been doing this for a while now, sometimes note count gets in your head and i’ll be the first one to admit it 😭 i try not to think so selfishly about stuff like that because again at the end of the day i absolutely love it, but i think it’s a common thing all content creators feel at some point in their time here …. at least i think?? i hope i’m not the only one …. and it’s hard to talk about that stuff in here bc sometimes ppl take it as “you only care about notes so if you’re unhappy stop doing it” so i try to be as positive as possible, you know?

i can’t help but sometimes think this way, you know? idk i just work really really hard and i want others to hopefully see and share the love that i have in making content ,,,,,,, but again, i also want to thank you so much for even coming here and saying this to me bub 💖 you have a lot going on and you totally didn’t have to take time out of your day to be super supportive, but you did and your kindness is really touching me 🥺 i never want to come across as negative to anyone but some days you are just more down on yourself than others, right? but regardless, thank you for your supportive and sweet words, they really made my heart swell earlier today 🥺 even if tumblr is in shambles (more than it is lol) this gal will still be giffing even if it kills me nsnndnndjd so , just thank you and i love you loads and i hope things will start to look better for you angel !!! have a nice night 💕💓💖💗💘💞💕💓💖💗💘💞💕💓💖💗💘💞

[softmahito]

i want to take care of you (drake x mc)

mc: dhalia cole summary: dhalia haven’t seen drake all day so she decides to check up on him +in this super perfect world both hana and maxwell knows that dhalia is in love with drake and not the prince because they’re bffs and can tell each other anything a/n: requested by a lovely anon ((”I’d love 51 from the ‘more writing prompts’ for Drake x mc”)) this is loosely based on chapter 17 from book one ((thanks for your help @firefly-hwufanficwriter )) and when i say loosely i really mean loosely +this will probably be a little ooc but i need this Drake in my life so just bear with me pls thanks words: 1,4k+                                                                🌸 SEND ME SOME REQUESTS 🌸                                                                            ⭐ MASTERLIST ⭐

Today was one of the most tiring days for Dhalia. Not physically but mentally. She truly didn’t mind doing some manual labour. After some time she learned to quite enjoy it. But today she got stuck at yet another dinner with the royal family. And dealing with King and Queen and trying to look like she’s still interested in the Prince was more exhausting than any physical work she could think of.

But what was absolutely the worst about this whole situation was the fact that this super fancy dinner meant none of her friends was there - almost none to be completely honest - but even tho Hana was there she was sitting almost on the other side of the table so there was no way Dhalia would have a chance to talk to her. So no Hana, no Maxwell and sure as hell no Drake. And she was certain that the lack of interaction with her friends made her so tired. She could bearly stop herself from yawning in the middle of the meal.

And if that wasn’t enough when she thought she was finally free Liam’s parents for some reason insisted she’d join them on the walk. And Dhalia certainly didn’t have much to say so of course she agreed and spent another two and a half hour wandering through the garden area behind the palace. She’d probably spent even more time with them but Maxwell came to her rescue. They drank some coffee together and then she could beyond any doubt head to her room and rest for a while. She laid on her bed and after few minutes she was fast asleep.

When Dhalia woke up the clock on her bedside table was showing 10 p.m. She yawned and was ready to change into her pyjamas and go back to sleep when suddenly Drake popped up in her mind. She didn’t see him today at all. Normally he’s always somewhere near, keeping an eye on her or hanging out with Maxwell. But today there was no sign of him and Dhalia already missed his sarcastic sense of humour and snarky remarks. So she ditched the previous plan and decided to go to his room and just check how he’s doing.

“Where are we sneaking?” Maxwell appeared beside her out of nowhere.

“Oh my god Maxwell! You scared the hell out of me! Where did you even come from?” Dhalia asked with one hand on her heart. “You know what? Actually, I don’t wanna know. And we are not sneaking. I am sneaking into Drake’s room. I haven’t seen him today at all. I’m kind of worried.” She explained.

“No one told you? For real?” Maxwell looked surprised. “Drake’s ill. He spent the whole day in his room. I thought you knew.”

“As you can tell I did not know that. So if you excuse me I’ll now go and see if he needs anything. Thank you very much.”

“Sure thing. And don’t you worry if something happens I’ll cover for you.” He winked at her and started to back up. “Don’t do anything I wouldn't do!” He added smirking.

Dhalia only shook her head and headed to Drake’s room. She was really glad that both Maxwell and Hana knew that Drake and she are something more than friends. She was so scared of telling them the truth but they were really understanding and Maxwell even claimed he kind of knew that there was something between them - in what she didn’t believe at all. But it was reassuring to know that they have her back.

The not-so-good part about it was that she finally would have to tell Liam that she fell for his best friend. She already tried that once but he was too busy and there was no way they could talk in private. At first, she was angry about it but then she realised that maybe she should talk about it with Drake first so later they can both tell Liam what’s going on.

When she stood in front of the doors to Drake’s room a small smile found its way on her face. There was something about this grumpy man that never failed to make her smile. No matter how bad things might be he always brought her joy.

She knocked a few times and when was met with no response she decided to just go inside. She gently opened the door and quietly went inside. At first, she didn’t even notice Drake but when she was walking closer to the bed someone moved there and then she saw him. With a fond smile on her face, she made her way to where Drake was laying. 

His face was a little more pale than usual. His hair was all over the place and his lips were parted a little as soft snores were coming out of his mouth. Dhalia couldn’t help herself but think that he looked just adorable. And she cursed herself for not taking her phone with her.

Sleep was clearly something Drake needed right and Dhalia really didn’t want to disturb him but at the same time, she was just unable to leave. So she took one of Drake’s shirt that was hanging on the chair and as quiet as she could take off her clothes and put on the shirt. Then she laid down beside him. Almost instantly Drake’s arms pulled her closer to him as if he knew that she’s the one laying next to him. 

“Now that is a nice surprise.” He murmured in a hoarse voice placing a light kiss on her neck.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.” Dhalia whispered feeling a little guilty.

“Cole, you can wake me up whenever you want. But shouldn’t you be asleep as well? It’s kinda late.”

“I was going to but I haven’t seen you all day and I just wanted to see how are you and then Maxwell told me that you’re sick so I had to come in case you’d need anything.” She explained as she turned to face him. His eyes were still closed but there was this playful smile on his lips.

“Right now I have everything I need in this bed.” He whispered making Dhalia blush.

“Drake I’m serious.” She chuckled. Before Drake could say anything he turned away from Dhalia and sneezed. “Bless you.”

“You’re here so clearly I've already been blessed.” He stated and reached for a tissue but as he groaned Dhalia figured out that there weren’t any near him.

“You’re impossible when you’re sick you know?” She referred to what he said. “Stay here and I’ll bring you more and maybe some glass of water.” She added.

“You realize you don’t have to do all of this, right?”

“I do, but I want to take care of you. I care about you.” She said simply and a moment later they were cuddling in bed again. “And I missed you today. It was so tiring.”

“Maxwell told me that you had dinner with Liam and his parents. How did it go?”

“Like always. It was really boring and of full of not-so-subtle comments about how I clearly shouldn’t be here.” She rolled her eyes. “And then I spent almost three hours walking in the garden with the royal family until Maxwell came and rescued me. I hadn’t even had time to talk to Hana or Maxwell for that matter.” She sighed. “But luckily it’s over now and there’s nothing to do tomorrow so I can stay all day in bed with you.”

“You sure you want that? I will probably infect you.”

“We have a whole day to catch up on. Plus I’m not scared of flu.” Dhalia said and leaned in to kiss him on the lips.

“Well, then I’m more than happy to spend tomorrow here with you, Cole.”