Tumgik
#NIGHT AFTER NIGHT ILL BE FUCKING YOU RIGHT
ohtobeleah · 2 days
Text
Something that goes without saying is how uncertain Logan really is about sleeping in the same space as another person. Sure, he'll commit to the fun beforehand….The foreplay, the sex, the highs.
But the inevitable act of sleeping beside someone, terrifies him.
We see it in Origin, we see it in Days of Future Past. Sometimes while Logan is sleeping, his claws come out when he feels under duress. Nightmares are a common occurrence for this man, not a night goes by where he isn't waking in the dead of night to the ghost of his past.
And I'd like to think of all the Logans running around the multiverse, that the Worst!Logan has surely been through some things. He's never experienced true rest. Not until he met you.
“I'll sleep on the couch.” Its common at the beginning of whatever the dynamic between the two of you is. Logan ends up back at your cafe, or in your living-room, bathroom, kitchen or bed—but he never stays beside you for longer than a few minutes after. Not because he doesn't crave that intimacy or true human connection, but because the idea of losing you to his own mutation truly scares the ever-living fuck out of him.
But one night, you catch him off-guard. So off guard that Logan doesn't even have a counter proposal ready.
“Ill join you,” You beam, padding down the hallway with your blanket and pillow wrapped in your arms. “Somethings bothing you and with friends like me and Wade, that shits gonna come up eventually,” You ramble. As you sit beside Logan on the lounge he slept on more often than his own bed, he catches a glimpse of a few noticeable scars on your back. Scars where his claws had once accidentally taken over in an otherwise romantic moment between the two of you. “So, get talking pops.”
“Don't call me pops.” Logan sighs as he opens his body up for you to snuggle up against him. “It's nothing I can't handle, didn't anyone ever tell you not to stick your nose where it doesn't belong?”
“Are you trying to tell me that I don't belong here?” You counter quickly, playing Logan’s logic against himself. “Me? Resident of this timeline? Doesn't belong right here next to you?”
“Go fuck yourself,” Logan smiles all the while trying to keep his brooding man mask on. But with you he feels ever atom of his being igniting with desire and unconditional love. “I worry I'll hurt you, while I'm sleeping,” Logan explains as you listen to his heartbeat inside his chest. Snuggled on the lounge in your apartment. “You don't know how much that thought terrifies me.”
“Hmm,” You hum in response. “Perhaps the question you should be asking yourself Lo, is what if the nightmares, what if the fear stops, when you allow yourself to rest with someone you love?” It was a bold word to use, and even though it was rarely, if ever used, there wasn't another word in the English language to describe how Logan felt about you. Or how you felt about him.
And its a thought that's never crossed Logans mind before. He frowns, thinking it over in the late-night silence. You fall asleep there, right with your head on Logans chest as he tru thinks.
Only to wake up in a tangled mess of sheets, with Logan snorning next to you as the early morning sun kisses his golden, aging skin. Its the first night in years he hasn't woken in screaming terror.
“Tell me told you so and I'll turn you into a skewer.” Logan mumbles as you pepper him with kisses across his exposed back.
“I think I'll take my chances with you, Lo,” You chuckle to yourself. “I'll make you some coffee.”
@a-reader-and-a-writer Canon Ilya universe content
Ilya
438 notes · View notes
carringtonsgirl · 2 days
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
PERVY!CHRIS HEADCANNONS
just chris trying to fuck his older brothers gf
REUPLOADED FROM MY OLD ACCOUNT!
a/n: one of these was supposed to be a full fic, but i never wrote it yet.
A/N: MY WORK IS MY WORK. I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION FOR ANYONE TO USE MY WORK AS THEIR OWN OR FOR INSPIRATION.
Tumblr media
PERVY!CHRIS who has always had a thing for justins girlfriend.
it all started after justin had told his brothers about a girl he goes and gets haircuts by. chris would always flirt with her everytime he went to her shop.
PERVY!CHRIS who would always sneak into the kitchen on family vacations in the middle of the night when he knew justins girlfriend was in there.
PERVY!CHRIS who has stolen a few pairs of justins girlfriends panties.
the first encounter was when justin and his girlfriend were staying a few days at marylous and her panties was in the laundry room. chris just couldn't help himself.
PERVY!CHRIS who always listens to her moans outside of justins door.
PERVY!CHRIS who always tries to persuade justins girlfriend into fucking him.
"cmon ma you know you wanna fuck me."
"chris im with your brother we can't."
"we can, i won't tell baby your secret is safe with me."
"i know i get you wetter baby. i can tell how you're clenching your thighs."
"...."
PERVY!CHRIS who always jerks off to her instagram posts.
chris knew it was wrong of him to do but it felt so right. he had his phone in his left hand scrolling through her instagram while he was jerking himself off with his right hand,his tip all red and glistening with precum. "oh fuck jgf the things you do to me." he muttered under his breath as he released white strings of cum all over his stomach.
PERVY!CHRIS who finally gets to fuck justins girlfriend in vegas.
justin went out with matt to go pick up food leaving chris and justins girlfriend alone. they were dumb if they trusted chris alone with her. chris finally got what he had been wanting. he had justins girlfriend all dumb on his cock while shamelessly pounding into her. "for someone who always denies wanting to fuck me you sure are such a dumb cockslut right now." chris chuckled. "such a whore for fucking your fiancés brother." chris slapped her ass as she was moaning his name repeatedly.
PERVY!CHRIS who gets asked if he ever hit the same girl as his brother.
chris was at the power slap event with matt and justin. justin was off getting a drink while this guy was talking to chris about him being a triplet.
"you and your brother ever hit the same girls?"
"no not that one."
"i fucked my older brothers fiancé."
"you wild for that."
"he's lying."
"matt ill show you the tape rightnow."
"...."
Tumblr media
tags: @hoeforchrizz @pvssychicken @riowritesitall @jazzylalalala @delusional-4-fake-people @deareststurns @luvs4matt
212 notes · View notes
bangmechanpls · 1 year
Text
JUNGKOOK’S NEW SINGLE?!??! DOING WHAT RIGHT?!?HOW MANY DAYS A WEEK?!? YOU WHAT AROUND ME!!? AND GIVE YOU WHAT?!?
5 notes · View notes
todayisafridaynight · 4 months
Text
sometimes i get nishiki i really do
#snap chats#like from an outsider perspective it is utterly hilarious watching everything go wrong for him#BUT GIRL NOT ME STOP HAVING THIGNS GO WRONG FOR MEEEEEE WHAT IS ALL THIS#this month its actually one thing after another if i start wearing white everyone needs to be concerned#you guys remember my bullshit roommates yeah well TLDR im getting fined for their messes im going to SCREAM#I HATE IT HEERRRREEE I KNOW IM EVIL BUT CMON#literally had such a silly night last night and now everything sucks again is this life is this what life is#its not its not what life is im just hearing my mom bitching in the other room and im letting her vibes ruin mine#everything going to be ok this is just a hiccup .... a small pinprick in the tapestry of life ....#i am incredibly annoyed though cause this is one of those situations where youve done nothing wrong but youre being shot for it#its just unfair but whatever we ball ..... im putting the hair gel away guys im not slicking my hair back just yet ....#i got a new friend last night so maybe ill just hang with them later and ill remember life is beautiful ..#heh ... jk ... i can remind myself life is beautiful right now ... im gonna go eat some tiramisu ...#jesus christ i really do love italian food what the fuck. pasta / calamari / tiramisu#i dont think calamari is italian but i got it from an italian place w/e we get the picture#its not my fault that italy has good food ... i would just never go there .....#ok bye ima go eat and drink water now. water will remind me how beautiful life is ...
21 notes · View notes
qqqqqqqqqqq0 · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
i did a thing
#crocheting#it was a really shitty day and i don't want to talk about it. i just need to yap#i will probably unknowingly say some borderline deranged traumatizing things further but idk its just the way i am#my existence itself is a major trigger warning so be aware#the only highlight of the day was the (i suppose) wlw couple i saw at the subway while pulling out shit like burdock out of my dress#i won't elaborate on the last piece can i be a little mysterious and less pathetic#so the wlw couple. one girl hugged the arm of the other girl and put the head on her shoulder. i saw that and was like “damn”#if you have a person you can willingly do things like that with you should know i would kill god just to be in your shoes#please cherish it#i didnt really look at them that much but then we got off on the same station and somehow they managed to overtook me#they were right ahead of me still all over each other and then it has striked me#that the girl hugging the arm of the other one was actually disabled and she needed help to walk properly#actually they were faster than me because my legs today are a total mess lol it hurts like hell just to make a step#but this is obviously just a temporary inconvenience and its nowhere near the problem that girl has#i don't compare myself to her in this regard but ive found this parallel kinda poetic#like how i as a relatively healthy individual with no major health issues was envious as fuck of those two#how i was walking in 0.25x with a shit ton of thoughts in my head while she was limping happily with a girl in her hand and smiling#no pity just envy and pure admiration. i want what they have#but im not sure if I deserve it. or actually need it#if i actually had something like that in my hands i don't know whether or not i would crush it into pieces#and then cry over it to the day i die. do you get it. am i too dramatic or too shallow as a person#originally i planned to talk about another thing entirely but this day has crushed my head and heart like a hammer#and now its turned to mush#no i guess it was a mush since long ago. then lets say this day was just crap. or life itself#nothing really happened to me but it reminded me of how helpless i am as a person vs the world and i hate being helpless#maybe ill tell you the story of how i lost the sensation in my fingertips another time when im not that traumatised by life events#(i lost it by saving a damsel in distress after walking out of the night bar a year ago. its a clickbait)
2 notes · View notes
stochastiz · 15 days
Text
tfw it seems like your job genuinely couldn't care less about your wellbeing :)
#the first time i got covid was at my last job and after that i developed the immune suppression and chronic ear infections that have been#ruining me for the past 2 years#then yesterday we found out that the kid i sent home sick friday (who i spent most of the day 1-on-1 with bc they were miserable) tested#positive friday night. but they didn't have an official diagnosis so work refused to tell families there had been a close contact. then this#morning we hear that another of my kids and their parent both tested positive. but those were 'only' home tests so we weren't allowed to#tell families there had been yet another close contact. all of my kids today were boogery and coughing but they don't require test-to-stay#or any isolation for close contacts with 'mild' symptoms. so i have gotten to spend 3 days now with at least 2 positive infants. i'm still#not even fully over the mild cold and subsequent infection i got 2 weeks ago. i tested negative again last night but there's just no way i#actually won't get it even if my home tests say i'm negative.#this is the first week back to school for older siblings. and they didn't warn anyone about a close contact over the long weekend when#i'm sure a bunch of families had gatherings. i'm just so fucking pissed. why tf do you think we're still seeing this shit????#our policies at work are treating covid 'like any other mild illness' so not only are all of my classroom INFANTS all being exposed but also#me and my co-teacher!!! and they don't care at all!!!!!!! there is a solid chance that when i get it it'll be v e r y bad for me#but who gives a shit? i'm just another disabled pos who shouldn't be working if i can't risk getting sick. bc that's how life works right?#i don't have words to explain the level of rage i feel over all of this. i'm so fucking tired of it.#pretty sure i use a different tag every time but#covid#chronically ill#stochastic ramblings
1 note · View note
toytulini · 1 year
Text
god i really went THREE FUCKING YRS without getting sick i was being so goddamn careful but then my parents got smth and foolish me, didnt step up the level of precaution i was taking around them, and lo and behold, im almost definitely sick
#toy txt post#grumping#AS SOON AS I HAVE TO GO BACK TO WORK AND DONT HAVE ANYMORE DAYS OFF TOO. GOD. I GUESS ILL FUCKING ASK TOMORROW#IF THEY WANT ME THERE OR NOT. obviously i will be wearing a mask. just. augh#the annoying part is i WAS taking precautions around my parents. wearing a mask around them. etc.#but foolish me let my door be open cos the room is a little warm. so their air conditioner just blasted all their Sick Air right into my#fucking bedroom ig. i have a hepa filter running all the time but it wasnt enough ig#and like. you know. at night when they were in bed id dare to be unmasked outside my room. my mistake ig#i ate food they made. i was wearing a mask around them but not the best mask i couldve cos that one does hurt my nose after awhile#i was wearing a mask around them but i wasnt likiting contact as much as i shouldve. they kept opening my door and coming into my room#before id gotten up so i couldnt get a mask on in time. etc. see. all on me i shouldve known better/s#idk. just. frustrated. i try to take my silly little precautions in a way that not fucking obtrusive to them#cos god forbid. god forbid i ask them to like. idk. wear a mask if theyre going to come in my room while Actively Sick.#or like. not be All Over The House Coughing. idk. fucking whatever. im the unreasonable one i know. my symptoms are not currently that bad#dont know if its covid#doesnt feel worth bothering to do a rapid test cos i keep hearing theyre not picking up new strains anyway and who fucking knows#idk!#i should try to get a little more sleep ig#feels like ill be okay im just fucking. mad
6 notes · View notes
ryuubff · 1 year
Text
sorry to come out as an army but now i want to draw idol!solomon in jungkook's new music video OUUUUU THE LYRICS AND CINEMATOGRAPHY IS SOMETHING... ESPECIALLY THE EXPLICIT VERSION HELP ME
8 notes · View notes
dragongeek1 · 2 years
Text
well friends I have officially joined the Chronic Pain Club, it’s not great to be here, there’s a chance it’s only temporary but my gut says ‘hmm many doubts’ and I won’t really know for a couple of weeks anyway until my doctors appointment. So. Been navigating that for four days and well we’re navigating at least
#there’s some sort of apollo prophecy dodgeball meme joke here#re me being close to many people w/ chronic pain/illness and being a strong empath#and already using spoon theory periodically for the mental health shite#‘ha ha wow this is so useful I’m glad spoonies consider mental health strugglers part of this too!’ and then I need you to imagine#that very specific TUNK sound a dodgeball makes#those thoughts have been living in my brain this weekend. anyway#mark and di if you happen to see this. TUNK (the dodgeball sound)#maybe it’s more irony than prophecy but as I said the thoughts have been there#I went to urgent care then the er thurs night because I spent an entire workday and over 8 hrs in severe abd pain#and it started on the lower right side so of course worried about appendix/gallbladder/etc#urgent care said yeah go to the er cause no matter what you need diagnostic imaging#and they asked have you ever had ovarian cysts I said no but my mom has (there’s thoughts it can be genetic)#do an ultrasound and sure enough I’ve got em!#and doing some reading up after the fact ‘most are asymptomatic and go away on their own!’ I was like well fuck#I mean that’s great but I’ve already failed the requirements I had STRONG symptoms#ibuprofen didn’t do a thing for the pain. until yesterday the hydrocodone they prescribed was all that would#yesterday experimented with three ibuprofen and that does help thankfully#so yeah needless to say I’m not very optimistic this is a ‘goes away on it’s own’ kinda cyst#but my obgyn is really booked and even squeezing me in/getting me in sooner is two weeks away#which is okay I get it healthcare is a mess#but yeah that means chronic pain for the foreseeable future#¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it is what it is#we’re navigating at least that’s all I can ask for#very glad I have today off because it was a very eventful weekend and I need an additional rest day lmao#but started off with low spoons because didn’t sleep well + pain so we’ll see how today goes#Cassie rambles#chronic pain shite#I have the mental health shite tag. might as well start that one lmao /cries
8 notes · View notes
pookiesatoru · 1 year
Text
this whores new favourite song actually
Tumblr media Tumblr media
3 notes · View notes
hauntingblue · 6 months
Text
And WHERE is the gyojin island road poneglyph
#oh the girls are fighting!!!!#three days and nights??? rookie numbers for ace and jinbe..... the son surpassed the father as always....#teech not sleeping?? lmao yeah he must be a monster shanks... TAKE CARE OF HIM THEN!!!#WHY DIES ROGER SAY FOUR IF THEY SAID THERE ARE THREE. WHAT IS GOING ON#they ARE passing oden arround like a blunt ajdhsksjsjsj edward us not happy about it.... not his oden chan...#oh the breakup.... he is maaaad#WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT BRINGS BACK MEMORIES HAVING KIDS ON BOARD????WHERE IS SHAKKY#shanks and buggy feeling like middle children now ajdhskd#oden left the person that loved him for hus person and now roger only wants him bc of his knowledge... so sad....#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 966#maybe hot take but sanke no binks has annoyed me every time it played since thriller bark bc they played it A LOT in there.....#shanks has hidden the fourth road poneglyph i am sure of it... why do they think there are only three... and roger knows where it is...#ICEBURG!!! FRANKY!!! my theory about his parents may be dead now or maybe not maybe they left him with tom and left#roger is not a real one.... he passed right by tequila wolf and just left.... luffy would never do that...#roger AND oden can hear the beasts???? they are empaths like luffy too....#the king will have a baby.... SEE HOW HE GOT MPREGGERS!!!! I WAS RIGHT!!!#there was one road poneglyph on gyojin island???? WHERE IS IT?? THIS IS THE ONE THATS MISSING????!!!#episode 967#baby hiyori reaching for kappa..... omg....#kinemon already liking momo.... thats his father fr....#roger and oden watching the sunset on wano from the boat.... they fucked after this....#genghis baan 💀💀#omg pedro...... saying he will help roger when he comes... well yes..#roger is so ill... also WHERE IS ROUGE#buggy got sick ajdhajsjj and shanks stayed to take care of him omg.....#JOYBOY LEFT THE TREASURE???? laughtale..... roger wanting to have lived in the same era as joyboy.... well your son did... there is that....#also i still wonder why shirohige didnt get to laughtale.... like he had the means (oden lmao)??? something sinister happened there...#episode 968
1 note · View note
chisungie · 1 year
Text
.
#GRRR >:( searching for utapri content makes me so grrrr !! but also thoroughly impressed#because people will post shit with the song title and group name ex quartet night you're my life#and ill hear it. and ill be like huh? what happened to the VA it sounds kinda diff? why does camus sound like hes struggling..#like ranmarus voice is rougher whats up with that? the mix is also a little- AND THEN I'LL HEAR IT. YOU MOTHERFUCKERS ARE GOOD AT THE VOICE#BUT I CAN RECOGNIZE MY BOYS. THIS IS A FUCKIGN COVER GROUP >:((#i can pick out quartet night cover groups from the real deal ANYDAY. but i wasnt ready so you definitely had me convinced but confused sobs#for starish.. well usually one member gives it away. this camus is fucking good tho ngl. all of them are but- OH THEY ALWAYS DO EXTRA ADLIB#THAT TOO. cover groups r so creative.. oh the mix is so much better when its the official ALSKDJ sORRY IT PLAYED RIGHT AFTER#DUDE AOI SHOTA'S VOICE <3 ID NEVER MIX HIM UP WITH ANYONE !!!! just like ill never EVER GET OTOYA MIXED UP WITH SOMEONE COVERING HIM. NEVER#anyway the point is. its hard enough to find any fucking utapri song when ur not in japan or have a vpn or smn.#and THEN WHEN YOU DO FIND THE SONG ITS A FUCKING COVER GROUP THAT GOT UNCREDITED BC OP THINKS ITS THE OFFICIAL ONE.. NO!#to the cover groups credit tho. theyre always fucking amazing tbh and if i didnt spend multiple years of my life fixating on these voices#then u mightve fooled me. but i did! so u wont fool me :'))#feelsbad tho bc the cover groups/singers get uncredited and the internet just goes on believing that it's the official release.#44597#anyway thats my rant bc i tried to listen to a song i hadnt heard in a while and had to wonder if the singers always sounded so awk.not neg
0 notes
todayisafridaynight · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
whatever og text i had in mind for this post about ko shibasaki looking like sayama in this movie is completely cancelled on account of utsumi (this character)'s first name being kaoru and i only found this out cause i was looking up her name just to be sure when making this post
Tumblr media
like jesus christ i legally have to make this post now
#snap chats#they literally never say her first name in the movie. i think lol LIKE WHEN I FOUND OUT I WAS JUST 'NO FUCKING WAY'#i do have to be tbh and say her face /is/ a little more round than sayama's#and its absolutely predominantly because of how her bangs and wardrobe are so close to sayama's that i think she look like her#BUT I CAAAANT THE WHOLE MOVIE I WAS JUST THINKIN ABOUT SAYAMA... i miss her...#OH RIGHT THE MOVIE THOUGH noooo fuck you this movie was so good it actually made me want to write a summary for it LMAOOO#LIKE I LIKE WRITING SUMMARIES BUT IVE JUST BEEN SO LAZY ABOUT IT WITH THE PAST FEW THINGS IVE SEEN BUT GOD.#ignore the fact i finished this movie two hours ago i was too busy fiddling with a card holder kit but. ill make a post about that next--#THIS MOVIE THOUGH NOOOOO IT WAS SO GOOD //SCREAMS AND YELLS AND DESTROYS A SNOWGLOBE//#god the part where ishigami and yukawa are walking by the homeless and it just lingers on an empty spot.. LIKE I THOUGHT I WAS WACK#CAUSE I WAS LIKE 'hang on wasnt there a guy there last scene' and obviously there was since the shot lingered right#BUUUUTT WHEN IT WAS REVEALED DOWN THE LINE SHUT UPPP I LITERALLY YELLED IM SO GLAD. my roommates arent home..#on god i thought the movie was gonna end with utsumi and fukawa's convo from the beginning#and i was gonna make a gaf about how fukawa was acting irrationally because he was too in love LMAOOO#BUT THEN IT KEPT GOING AND. im so glad it did. ishigami valid tbh#id also cover up and take blame for AND ACTUALLY commit murder for a girl if she said hi to me and made me lunch while i was trying to kms#while fukawa and ishigami were talkin that first night tho i just thought of after the rain.. lol... maybe the mangaka was inspo'd by that.#anyway. this movie was great. it reminded me of sherlock but if it was directed well and actually let you solve the mystery too#CAUSE WHILE I WAS WATCHING THERE WERE POINTS WHERE I TOO WAS JUST 'hang on' AND I JUST POCKETED THE INFO FOR LATER#i kicked and screamed when ishigami was talking abut how he formats his tests LIKE I SAID 'oh you fucking slipped'#when ishigami called and told her he had a white envelope in there bitch i knew it was gonna be the stalker letter i YELLED#LIKE I LIKE HOW THE MOVIE SETS THINGS UP SO ABUNDANTLY. IT'S FUN SEEING IT FIT IN THE MOVIE LATER ON#the twist of there being two bodies was so fun tho cause at the start of the movie i was sure two murders happened the same night#so when it was played off as just one i was like Oh. Ok. im still stumped on how he snuck a body out of the apartment#but yk what one detail is like. whatever in comparison to the rest of the movie being fun to watch#god im running out of tags POINT IS. PLEAAASE watch this movie if you got two hours#ive left some minor warnings on my Watchlist doc but there's nothing. TOO extreme ??#i mean there's an aforementioned suicide attempt but aside from that it's nothing too grotesque. for an rgg fan ig#ok bye i have to ramble about the card holder i got <3
52 notes · View notes
theirtheretheyre · 1 year
Text
ive got jungkooks stupid fucking song stuck in my head. we didnt need to know how much youre fuckin. whore.
1 note · View note
cherienymphe · 1 month
Text
White Lines & White Knights
Tumblr media
Rafe Cameron x Reader
Warnings: NON-CON, DUB-CON, pr*stitution, power imbalance, classism, mentions of death, jealousy, humiliation, revenge p*rn, drug dealer!Rafe, drug use, Pogue!reader
➥ banner by @vase-of-lilies | ➥ divider by @firefly-graphics
Tumblr media
summary: You and Rafe are using each other until you decide that's not what you want anymore, and the spoiled rich kid will do whatever it takes to have his expensive toy back in his bed.
Your door shut behind you with a resounding click, and once in the comfort of your home, you took the time to decompress. You took advantage of your much needed reprieve, the back of your head grazing the wood as you allowed your eyes to fall closed. Your heart was still beating wildly in your chest, and you wondered if a day would come where it ever wouldn’t. After all, this wasn’t exactly “new” anymore…
It had been five months since you buried your mom, five months since you discovered the mountain of debt she’d done an impressive job of hiding from you, and five months since you thought you’d be homeless on the street in less than one. In two weeks, you’d dealt with a loss you didn’t think you’d have to for at least another forty years or so and took on the kind of responsibility you didn’t think you’d have to for at least another three.
Your mom died 152 days ago…
…and you’d started fucking Rafe Cameron less than a month later.
You liked to pretend to not know why you slept with Kildare’s prime rich boy that fateful Saturday night, but you were far more self aware than you wanted to be. Even if you weren’t, it wasn’t exactly some mysterious string of decisions that lead to being tangled up in the sheets with Sarah’s asshole of an older brother. You didn’t need to pay someone to diagnose you.
You were grieving.
It was really just that simple, and the monetary stress on top of that drove you to find comfort in strange drinks and hard drugs. To this day you still didn’t know if Rafe just happened to be at the right place at the right time or if he heard whispers about John B.’s best friend snorting pills and getting shit faced when her usual crowd was looking the other way, but either way, the stuffy Kook clearly saw an opportunity to kill several birds with one stone.
“First two lines are free,” he’d told you that night, the bass of the music downstairs muffled by the expensive walls of some girl’s house.
You remembered how you’d chuckled, drunkenly shaking your head.
“Well, two lines is all I’m doing, I guess,” you’d murmured, throwing your hands up.
Rafe’s smirk had been cruel, a mocking glint in his blue eyes.
“What?” he’d dragged out, head tilted. “Spent all that life insurance money, already?”
Any other time and Rafe’s insensitivity might’ve upset you, but at the time you’d been drunk out of your mind and looking for more ways to forget the sudden absence in your life.
“I can’t imagine why Sarah hates you,” you’d sarcastically replied, approaching the impressive desk and leaning over to inhale a line.
You wiped your nose as you straightened, lashes fluttering as you ignored the feeling of Rafe’s gaze on you.
“I’ll be lucky if I even have a house to live in next week.”
The words had come out slurred, accompanied by a light chuckle, and deep down you’d felt the flutter of stress that you’d been desperately ignoring for weeks. You’d quickly snorted the other line, closing your eyes for a moment.
“Turns out my mom was skilled at hiding more than just illnesses…”
You remembered the silence—from both you and Rafe—and how in that moment you’d allowed yourself a solid four seconds of lingering on the reality of your predicament. In those four seconds, your eyes had watered and your lips had trembled and your throat had tightened, and after those four seconds, you were turning to Rafe with a haughty smile.
“Guess you won’t be finding a new client in me, huh?” you’d wondered with a shrug, finding a seat on the desk.
Rafe’s blue gaze had been unreadable as he eyed you, sitting in the chair at the desk, legs spread as he ran his eyes over you—slowly and in a way you didn’t hate at the time. You hadn’t been able to tell what he was thinking, although looking back, you wondered how it wasn’t so obvious to you then. Maybe because it was just too cruel of a thought, and while it was no secret Rafe was a spoiled asshole, you had never once thought of him as cruel.
Rafe had merely shrugged.
“There’s plenty of fish in the sea,” he’d slowly said, the corner of his pink lips curving upwards just a tad. “Besides…”
You’d watched him stand, rounding the desk to come and tower over you where you sat.
“I like to think of myself as a pretty ethical kind of guy…”
You’d started to snort at that before his gaze met yours again, and you found yourself swallowing whatever you were about to say. You hadn’t done a thing when Rafe reached up to touch your arm, the feel of his finger so light. You hadn’t wanted to acknowledge the way your heart skipped a beat at both his close proximity and the change in atmosphere. You hadn’t been able to ignore—however—the heat that settled in the pit of your stomach.
“...and I’ve been known to meet people halfway. Accept whatever they can offer…”
You remembered your internal conflict that night.
You’d been drunk and high and sad…not stupid. You knew exactly what Rafe was insinuating to you, and you’d struggled with the idea of really sleeping with Rafe Cameron for more drugs. The man was far from unattractive, sure that if drugs weren’t involved you’d still consider sleeping with him. If you’d believed in any of that, you’d imagine that your mom was turning over in her grave. At the time though, you hadn’t been quite sure as to what you believed in, so when he took your silence for consent, leaning in and touching your nose with his…
You hadn’t stopped him when he closed the distance.
You hadn’t even known whose house you were at, only internally apologizing to them for having sex on their expensive desk. You didn’t know if it was the drugs or the alcohol or simply Rafe Cameron, but it was easily the best sex you’d ever had in your life, and at one point you’d really considered how much better it could possibly be to fuck him without the condom.
You had no idea that you’d eventually find out.
Once dressed, you’d walked home with a small bag of pills and a satisfied grin. You knew that your friends would host some kind of intervention if they ever found out, but all you’d been able to focus on was the simple fact that fucking Rafe Cameron for a little coke and pills wasn’t sounding like the worst idea. Of course, if you’d known that you’d eventually start fucking him for your livelihood, you might’ve made different choices that night.
You pressed your hand to your face and pushed away from the door, eager to start the shower and scrub the stench of him off of you. Per routine, you took the money out of your pocket before getting undressed, eyeing the wad of one hundreds that now sat on your nightstand. Two grand was nothing to someone like him, but to someone like you, it made all the difference in the world.
…and Rafe knew that.
He’d known that when he handed you a thousand dollars one night, the coke in your system just starting to hit. You’d looked up at him from where you sat in confusion, hesitantly wrapping your hand around the money as you alternated between eyeing it and eyeing him. You hadn’t known how to feel about it, especially since it had only been moments ago when he was inside of you…and there he was handing you a grand in hundreds.
“Don’t look like that,” Rafe had chuckled, walking to his dresser in search of a shirt. “You know you need the money.”
He wasn’t wrong…and that was the problem.
Unless you hit a lucky streak in life, you’d always need the money, and that was exactly why you were in the predicament you were in—four months later and putting up with the monster that was Rafe Cameron just to keep a roof over your head. The thought brought tears to your eyes, positive now that your mom could see you and was beyond disappointed in you. 
Her disappointment could only be outdone by your own.
You were in a situation that you couldn’t get out of, on the verge of ending this arrangement so many times before asking yourself what better way could you pay your mom’s debts and survive? It wasn’t easy money by far, but it was fast money, and it was the kind of money that would take months to make at whatever low paying job you’d find around Outer Banks. Someone like you rarely got hired at the country club or working for some rich snob who wiped their ass with the kind of money you needed.
Rafe knew this too.
Tears kissed your eyes as you scrubbed your skin raw, wishing that you could scrub away the nasty bruise right along with the sweat and grime. You winced every time you touched it, cursing the blond and feeling one of those moments where you considered blocking him and moving on from this pathetic era in your life for good.
Fucking Rafe Cameron for drugs didn’t seem like a bad idea at the time, fucking him for money seemed like an even better one…until that entitled attitude started to extend to the woman he was paying good money to have access to. You remembered the first time you opposed something he wanted to do, the way in which he ignored you, the way he merely pressed your face into the pillow to shut you up.
It was the first time you felt truly icky about this whole situation.
Not even just icky.
…but afraid.
“I don’t pay you to tell me what you will and won’t do in bed,” he’d chuckled at you like it was the funniest thing he’d ever heard.
You’d still been trembling and wiping mascara from your cheeks.
“I pay you because I want to fuck you,” he’d slowly whispered to you, leaning in. “...and you let me because you don’t want to be sleeping on the beach.”
He’d held your gaze for what felt like too long, impressing upon you the true dynamic of this arrangement, and you remembered the unease that had festered in your gut that day. Maybe all the drugs and alcohol hadn’t allowed you to fully look at this arrangement for what it was and the power imbalance here, but you had for the first time that day, and you hadn’t liked it.
You liked it even less now, wrapping the towel around you and wondering how you were ever going to get out of this predicament you’d put yourself into.
Tumblr media
“My family’s going out of town for the weekend,” the familiar blond mumbled to you as he inhaled a familiar powdery substance off the back of his hand. “Pack a bag when you get home, and I’ll pick you up tomorrow night.”
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at that, huffing instead.
“I can’t spend the whole weekend on Figure 8,” you told him. “I have plans.”
Rafe nodded, and you hated the smile that danced across his lips.
“Okay, uh, be ready at 8, I don’t want-.”
“Rafe, I’m serious,” you cut him off, shrugging. “I can’t stay at your house all weekend.”
You watched him watch you, slowly swiping his tongue between his lips as a frown started to take over. His dirty blond hair kissed his brows, and the longer the silence stretched, the more nervous you grew. You watched as Rafe glanced away, seemingly deep in thought before those baby blues of his rested on you, much colder than they were a few seconds ago.
“What the hell am I paying you for?” he whispered.
The question was rhetorical, and you swallowed.
“Rafe…I’ve barely seen my friends in months. I finally made plans to meet up with them for more than five minutes and-.”
“...and whose fault is that?” he shrugged.
You frowned at him.
“Nobody told you to go off on a bender when your mom kicked the bucket…” you blinked at his callousness. “Maybe you should’ve been finding comfort in your friends instead of drugs and vodka…and me.”
He finished his sentence with a soft—and yet cruel—smile.
“I pay you good money—great money even!—to be available when I want you to be, and unless you’ve found some other rich asshole to open your legs for, which I doubt…be ready tomorrow at 8.”
He was standing, now, looking down at you where you sat on the bed. The harsh reminder of your roles here had you looking away, and Rafe turned away when he rightfully took your silence as confirmation. You stared at the wall for a few moments before turning to stare at his back, thinking to yourself that this couldn’t go on much longer. Whether it took 1 or 5 jobs, you couldn’t keep relying on Rafe Cameron forever.
What was once a weekly occurrence had turned into something entirely other, and it hadn’t bothered you so much when your mother’s death was still so fresh and you were seeking solace in the worst coping mechanisms known to man—including isolation. Now, however, you were waking up to the choices you’d made and you hated the feeling of being inebriated and being surrounded by people you barely knew.
You hated being away from your friends.
“I didn’t even know you’d gotten a job,” John B. said to you hours later, looking disappointed but understanding. “JJ’s gonna be real disappointed. He’s been talking all week about having you try some new weed he got.”
You gave a light laugh at that, a pang in your chest at how much you missed doing stupid shit with them.
“Yeah,” you sadly said. “The world—and bills—doesn’t stop just because my mom died.”
The brunette grew quiet at that, worriedly eyeing you now.
“You doing okay…?”
You sighed at that, looking out over the yard of The Chateau, fiddling with your fingers as you thought of a certain blond.
“I’ve been better, but…I’ve been worse too.”
Your answer was honest, and you briefly wondered what John B. would think if he knew just how bad ‘worse’ had been. You didn’t think any of them would hate you if they knew the full extent of just how far you’d fallen, but you knew they’d have a hard time wrapping their head around it. The drugs and alcohol were one thing, but Rafe Cameron was entirely another. The man was the worst example of a Kook if there was one, representing every bad trait attributed to them.
Your friends would not understand you essentially sacrificing your self respect for money and drugs.
Sometimes you didn’t understand it either. 
Most especially when Rafe had his hands around your neck.
He picked you up at 8 on the dot Friday night—a man of his word if nothing else—and less than a hour later you were bent over his father’s desk as he pounded into you. Your head was hanging off of it, fighting hard to not scrape your nails against the dark mahogany. It wasn’t the first time Rafe fucked you on Ward’s desk, and you doubted that it would be the last time. There’d even been a few rare occasions when he fucked you in the older man’s bed, and you didn’t know what complex the blond had that fueled these decisions, but you weren’t a psychologist so you figured it wasn’t anything to concern yourself with.
Despite the tight grip on your throat, a choked moan managed to escape every time Rafe pushed his cock into you. Sweat made his skin glisten, and you were sure you fared no better. His hair wasn’t so neat, now, and you had the stray thought that you preferred it that way. Rafe being so far from ugly definitely made this arrangement easier to swallow down at times, but other times it just made you angry.
How was it fair that someone seemingly had everything, including the big dick to match?
Rafe walked around like he was God’s gift to the world, possessing one of the most rotten personalities you’d ever had the pleasure of being on the receiving end of, and he seemed to be rewarded with it with everything the average person could only dream about. As if any of that wasn’t enough, you practically rewarded him with even more by essentially telling him he could do whatever he wanted so long as the price was right.
It made you disgusted with yourself at times.
When he pressed a hand to your stomach, hips slowing to a pace that made your breath hitch, you squeezed your eyes shut. In the quiet office, the sound of his cock disappearing between your folds was loud, the wet noise telling you that there’d no doubt be a mess left on Ward’s desk when this was all said and done. You heard Rafe curse, and you didn’t have the energy to lift your head from where it hung off the desk.
“...and to think,” he panted from above you. “You were going to pass this up to sit around with those dirty Pogues.”
At this, you did attempt to sit up, a hand against his chest and one on the desk as he thrusted into you.
“Those ‘dirty Pogues’ are my friends,” you forced out, lashes fluttering. “...and clearly you forget that I’m one too.”
Rafe merely chuckled at that, perfect teeth winking at you as he grinned.
“Yeah, but you’re my dirty Pogue so it’s a little different.”
His words had your frown deepening, disgust filling your chest at the way he talked about you while literally fucking you. Completely turned off, you turned your head away, attempting to separate yourself from him. That haughty laugh reached your ears, and to your dismay, he wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you closer.
“What…?” he lazily drawled. “You don’t like the sound of that?”
“You’re being an asshole, get off of me…”
He jerked his hips against you, making you gasp, and you squirmed in his arms as you fought to get away. Rafe leaned in to harshly nip his teeth at your cheek, his movements growing rough, causing the desk to shake.
“I’ve spent too much money on you to not say whatever the hell I want,” he evenly said. “So, yeah, at this point, I’ll confidently say I practically own you.”
Tears kissed your eyes at the disgusting words, and fed up with your resistance, Rafe merely placed a hand between your breasts before harshly shoving you back down. You winced at the action, but you had no time to fully linger on it as Rafe started to roughly plunge his cock into you, the sound of his skin slapping against yours reaching your ears. He wouldn’t allow you to sit up, both of his hands wrapped around your wrists now as he leaned over you.
This felt too reminiscent of the time he’d pressed your face into the bed, telling you to relax as he pressed the head of his cock just above where your folds were. You recalled the uncomfortable feeling and the tears that stained the pillow as he slowly fucked you in a place no one ever had before. The deja vu of it all had your mind wandering, eyes defocusing as you just waited for it to be over. It seemed like Rafe’s grunts sounded from above you forever, and when he finally came onto your stomach with a low moan, you didn’t move for some time.
You were slow to sit up as he got dressed, trembling as you steaded yourself for what you were about to say.
“I don’t wanna do this anymore.”
The words came out whispered, but in the quiet study, you might as well have yelled them. Rafe didn’t acknowledge you, and you knew it wasn’t because he hadn’t heard you. Frustrated with his refusal to take you seriously, you hopped off of Ward’s desk, angrily grabbing your clothes.
“I’m serious, Rafe. After this weekend…this is done,” you continued, voice firmer, now. “Don’t call me or text me or worry about any more money. I can’t rely on you forever anyway.”
By now, Rafe was actually listening to you, and you avoided his gaze as you got dressed. His silence was loud, and when you were finally decent again, only then did you lift your gaze to glance at him. His visage was unreadable, and after some time, he merely blinked at you.
“If I remember correctly, per your own words, your mom had enough debt ‘to file for bankruptcy’.”
His words made you sharply inhale, and you bit your tongue as he ran his hands through his hair in a poor attempt to tame the damp locks.
“Don’t ruin your life just because you’re pissed at me,” he coldly added.
You crossed your arms over your chest, pulling your lip between your teeth.
“Personal feelings aside, I can’t rely on you forever, Rafe. That’s just the truth. I have to figure something out eventually, and there’s no time like the present,” your voice shook as he fixed you with an unnerving stare. “I miss my friends, and I don’t want to be the sad, damaged girl running to Rafe Cameron just so I don’t feel anything anymore.”
The blond followed your lead, folding his arms over his own chest as he leaned against the wall, staring you down with that annoying crooked smile.
“...and where exactly do you plan to find a job that pays you what I do?”
“There are jobs, Rafe. I’ll find one.”
You didn’t appreciate his tone nor the look he was giving you as he studied you. He was looking down on you, and yes while that wasn’t exactly an unusual occurrence, this time was different. He was looking down his nose like he didn’t believe in you, like he expected you to be crawling back to him in no time, begging him to fuck you again.
After a few moments, that crooked smile curved even more, and you didn’t miss the glint in his eyes.
“Well, I wish you luck…”
His voice didn’t match the words that came out of his mouth, and his gaze most certainly didn’t.
Tumblr media
“I literally called this morning and was told over the phone that you all were hiring...and now I get here, and I’m being told you’re not…?”
You tried to keep the skepticism out of your tone, but your frustration at your predicament was bubbling up and threatening to be unleashed on the lone man before you. The inside of the country club was practically empty—a slow Tuesday—and you briefly glanced around at the two staffers in the whole room. Sure, you could write it off to a slow day that didn’t need a full staff, but something in you told you that it was more than that.
You didn’t believe the man in front of you.
“Look, I don’t know what else to tell you, miss. Whoever you talked to got it wrong. I’m sorry for the miscommunication on our end,” was his only explanation.
You didn’t dare bother to point out that both he and whoever you’d spoken with on the phone sounded damn near identical.
When it became obvious that this conversation was over, you turned away with a small huff, breezing outside to a familiar dark car. Kie was standing by it, arms uncomfortably crossed over her chest, glaringly obvious that she’d rather be anywhere but here despite being from ‘here’.
“Well…?” she wondered as you got closer.
“They’re not hiring,” you mumbled as you slid into the passenger seat.
She joined you inside the vehicle a moment later, a frown on her face.
“...but you called.”
“I know.”
There was a beat of silence before she scoffed, reaching for her door handle.
“If this is because you aren’t some rich snob looking for play money…”
She trailed off when you spoke up.
“No, I don’t…I don’t think it’s that,” you stopped her. “Let’s just go.”
She eyed you for a few moments, frown deepening.
“Are you sure? Y/N, this is like the fourth place you’ve been to today,” she pointed out. “...and I don’t want to add my stress to your stress, but it’s kind of fucked up.”
You didn’t have the heart to tell her that it wasn’t possible for you to be any more stressed than you already were, simply signaling for her to drive. You could feel her eyes periodically landing on you as she did, and you chewed on the inside of your cheek, wondering why the universe had it out for you.
It had been weeks since you’d last seen or talked to Rafe, weeks since you ended your little arrangement, and weeks since you’d had a consistent source of income. It wasn’t a pretty nor respectable way to make money, but you’d been making money nonetheless. However, you couldn’t find it in you to continue sacrificing your self respect to keep sleeping with Rafe Cameron. You’d also been telling the truth when you told him you didn’t want to be this messed up sad thing anymore.
You had long let go of the drugs and cut back on the drinking, and now you’d dropped Rafe too.
You’d had hope…but now it was dwindling.
No one would hire you. In fact, no one had even allowed you far enough to officially apply just to get a foot into an interview. It was always the same. You’d call ahead so you didn’t waste your time, they’d tell you they were looking for people, and then the moment you actually showed up and introduced yourself, it was an entirely different story. It didn’t make any sense to you, and the thought of ever proving Rafe right made you want to be sick.
“How bad is it?” JJ asked you a few days later, the both of you away and isolated in some corner of some guy’s party.
You looked down at the weak drink in your hand, contemplating on whether or not to be honest.
“It’s…manageable.”
A whopper of a lie.
“...then why don’t I believe you? Come on, Y/N, it’s me. I know your mom wasn’t the best when it came to funds, and when she died…” he scoffed. “You weren’t exactly in any shape to march down to anyone’s job and fight for work just to keep things afloat.”
You looked away at that, throat tight.
“I’m honestly shocked you’ve kept it up for this long.”
If only he knew…
You felt his gaze on you as you wondered just how truthful you should be, but you reminded yourself that this was JJ. If he knew the full extent of everything, he’d be likely to rob a bank. Nevermind the fact that it would just make him ask more questions, like how you’d even managed to keep things afloat all this time. You didn’t think you could lie to him, and you didn’t think you could handle being on the receiving end of whatever look JJ would undoubtedly give you if you told him you’d been sleeping with Rafe to pay your bills.
You didn’t know if it was fortunate or unfortunate that the subject of your thoughts walked through the doors to prevent this conversation from continuing. His presence shouldn’t have shocked you—the party was pretty mixed with people from all sides of the island after all—but it still gave you pause, and JJ noticed.
“This asshole,” you heard the blond murmur, rolling his eyes.
You were inclined to agree, and you shrunk in on yourself with your drink, unable to ignore the knowledge that Rafe was at the same party you were at. In the weeks you’d been free of him, you’d had time to really ponder on your dalliance, and while you’d long accepted your hand in your own life choices, it was now hard to ignore Rafe’s own opportunistic choices in the situation. Sure, yes, you fucked him for money…
…but what did it say about him that he was perfectly happy to enter an arrangement in which he kept you off of the streets so long as you opened your legs for him?
If he was a good guy he’d just…keep you off the streets.
Like JJ would if you ever told him the truth.
You’d just decided to stop hiding in the bathroom when you came face to face with the man himself, heart skipping a beat at his presence. He was leaning against the wall next to the door, and you had the sneaking suspicion he hadn’t been waiting for his turn.
“How’s the job search going?” was how he greeted you, and you hadn’t been able to keep the ire off of your face.
He softly laughed to himself at that, nodding.
“I figured you’d look a little something like that.”
“Fuck you,” you breathed, and Rafe frowned, tilting his head to the side.
“You were, remember? And then you stopped…and that’s how you found yourself back at square one,” he reminded you.
The music traveled from downstairs into the dimly lit hallway, and you looked away from him just as he heaved a tired sigh.
“Do I need to apologize for calling you and your friends dirty Pogues? Is that what this is about?” he lazily wondered.
You didn’t dignify that with a response, and when you lifted your gaze, Rafe was rolling his eyes. He fixed you with a look, reaching up to touch your hair with a tsk.
“Come on, Y/N. You need me…”
He leaned in.
“We both know it, and you’re never going to find a job in this town.”
“You don’t know that,” you fired back, slapping his hand away as you took a step away from him.
Almost instantaneously, Rafe’s entire expression morphed, and you swallowed at the shadow that passed over his features. His pink lips pressed together, and those blue eyes hardened in a way you’d never been on the receiving end of. You watched his nostrils flare.
“Oh, trust me, I know.”
The combination of his tone and his expression and his words gave you pause, and your brows pulled together as you stared at him. For a moment, the music in the house faded into the background as Kie’s words came to your mind. ‘It’s kind of messed up’, she’d said, and while you hadn’t given that much thought to the statement then…you certainly were now.
“What did you do?” you shakily asked the blond, skin growing cold.
Rafe didn’t answer right away, and when he did, it was a lie anyway.
“I don’t know what you mean,” was all he said, one brow raised.
You felt tears kiss your eyes, and you felt silly for not putting the pieces together earlier. You didn’t know how, but somehow, Rafe had a hand in your lack of employment. It seemed exactly like something he’d do, but the only thing you couldn’t understand was why. Why do it? Just to see you fail? Just to feel like he’d won?
“Look, this little rebellious act…it’s cute and amusing and all…” he shrugged off with a small smile. “...but it’s silly. We both know you’re just going to end up right back under me.”
“You’re such an asshole,” you hissed, moving past him.
“Yeah, and you knew that when you let me fuck you for drugs on some guy’s desk,” he threw at you, making you flinch and slow down. 
“I was going through things then, Rafe! I didn’t…” you huffed a sigh, turning to glower at him. “I didn’t care about things I most definitely should have. It’s different now.”
You threw your hands up.
“I’m different, now, and I don’t want to keep sacrificing my dignity and self respect just to keep a roof over my head. I don’t want to sleep with someone who views me and anyone like me as beneath him. It disgusts me, and unlike you, I have no interest in sleeping with people who I claim disgust me.”
You watched Rafe’s lip curl over his teeth.
“Yeah, that’s real respectable and noble and all, but I wonder how noble it’ll feel when you’re being evicted,” he spat at you, moving closer. “You’re not getting a job in this town, that I can promise you, so you keep this up for as long as you want to, but we both know how this ends.”
You leaned away from the finger in your face.
“I fucking own you,” he bit out, roughly grabbing your arm and yanking you close despite your resistance. “You named your price, and I paid it-.”
“For a service! Not a person,” you harshly whispered.
Rafe’s chuckle was cold as he stared you down, perfect teeth winking at you.
“You think you’re the only girl in Outer Banks willing to spread her legs for some money? You think I’d have to pay any of them half of what I paid you?” your stomach dropped at his words. “I’ve been a lot more generous than you realize.”
He roughly let you go, practically shoving you away from him, and you stumbled. He eyed you with an expression filled with promise, and when you turned away to finally find your friends and hopefully leave, you descended the stairs on unsteady legs.
Tumblr media
You pushed against Rafe’s arm and chest as he held your chin in a tight grip. The vehicle you were next to hid you both from view, everyone on the beach none the wiser to what was happening in the parking lot. Your feet tripped over one another as he forced you back, trapping you between him and the metal contraption.
“Is that what you came up with? You think that pathetic Pogue is going to pay your bills? Give you a place to stay when that eviction notice is taped to your door?”
“Get…off…of me,” you snarled, finally shoving him away with difficulty.
Your breathing was heavy as you glared at the blond, lips trembling and heart racing at the downright evil glint in his blue eyes. You glanced over his shoulder for any way to get away from him, your frustration growing as he moved closer.
“Color me curious, but is it somehow more dignified to fuck someone like JJ instead of me?”
The jealousy dripping from his every word threw you for a loop, and you weren’t in the right headspace to even linger on how strange that was.
“Not that it’s any of your business, but we’re not like that,” you drunkenly choked out. “I don’t know why you feel like I need to answer to you about my personal choices.”
It had only been thirty minutes ago that you were dancing with your friends. JJ—ever the flirt—had gotten a bit handsy, but it was nothing unusual. He could get handsy with a tree, and you’d merely smiled at the behavior, ignorant to the heated gaze that was hyper focused on you. You hadn’t even realized he’d been following you when you went to get a drink from Hayward’s truck.
“Butt out of my life already. You’ve already done enough,” you hissed at him, moving to get past him when he stopped you.
“We’re not done talking-.”
His words were interrupted by your hand, the sound of the slap echoing in your ears, and he’d just harshly pushed you against the car at your back when a familiar voice interrupted you both.
“Get off of her!”
Kie was suddenly there, helping you in shoving him away, and she looked at Rafe like he’d lost his mind—like she’d bore witness to an even sinister side to him. The blond didn’t seem all that fazed by her presence, barely sparing her a glance as his jaw clenched, his eyes on you. Clearly he felt that whatever he was contemplating wasn’t worth it, because without another word—but not without a final scoff—he made his way back to the party on the beach.
Kie wrapped her arms around you when you started to cry.
“Are you okay? Did he hurt you?”
What a loaded question, and you realized that the truth was just on the edge of your tongue. Unable to stop yourself, you threw your arms around her, collapsing under the weight of all your choices and what had led you to make them.
“Kie,” you started, voice trembling in her ear. “I have to tell you something.”
If she was horrified by the truth, she didn’t show it much. You could tell she was shocked as the words tumbled from your lips, her brown eyes stricken and face draining of color. You didn’t know what bothered her more—the drugs, the prostitution, or that both involved Rafe Cameron. As it turns out, it was none of those things.
“Why didn’t…why didn’t you let us help you?” she tearfully wondered, looking between your eyes. “We know how hard it’s been for you, and we wanted to be there for you, but you…you just disappeared. You barely came around, and John B. heard things, but he didn’t want to believe them.”
She whispered that last part, and your chest ached at the thought of your friends hearing about your out of character behavior but feeling powerless to stop it, accepting it as part of your grief.
“Rafe’s a demented asshole,” she finally spoke on the elephant in the room. “...and we won’t let him win, okay?”
There was conviction in Kie’s voice, the kind of conviction that made you want to believe her, and so you nodded at her words.
She helped you straighten, wiping your face and taking you back to the party, quietly promising you that she wouldn’t say anything about any of this to the guys. She stuck to you for the rest of the night, and a week later, she made good on her promise, her parents shaking your hand as they welcomed you to their staff.
“We could always use the extra hands,” Mrs. Carrera told you one Friday evening. “It gets crazy busy, especially on the weekends.”
All the noise in the restaurant only validated her statement.
You’d been working at The Wreck for a week, and while it was nothing like what Rafe had been paying you, it was a job. It was a means of earning your own money that didn’t involve lowering yourself to the likes of Rafe Cameron. It was grueling, sure, and you sometimes wondered if it was truly worth the money, but then you’d think of the alternative, and you’d decide that it was worth something and that’s what mattered.
You hadn’t been paying that much attention when you approached your last table for the night, looking up from the apron at your waist and stopping in your tracks.
“Hey, I didn’t know you worked here too,” Topper said, a fairly neutral greeting.
Topper may have been just as much of an asshole as his friends, but he at least played nice for the public. Your gaze traveled around the table, quickly looking away when it connected with a familiar blue.
“It’s…a fairly new gig,” you finally said, getting your notepad ready.
“Hey, if you’re going to use your friends for anything, might as well use them to become a productive member of society,” he told you, his tone now making you frown.
Opting to ignore the comment, you asked them what they wanted. You didn’t make eye contact with Rafe when he gave you his order, hand unsteady as you wrote it down. When you left them to go and get their drinks, you weren’t surprised to hear the scrape of a chair behind you. You were focused on rounding the counter, reaching for some clean glasses.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
You didn’t forget your last encounter with the rich blond, tempted to ignore his presence altogether, but you were unfortunate enough to know how Rafe operated. Pausing in your movements, you turned to look at him, not surprised at all by the unhappy look on his face.
“I’m working, Rafe. What does it look like?”
You eyed the way his jaw ticked, finger gently tapping against the counter as he simply…stared you down. You glanced away, realizing that he didn’t have any power over you anymore. No, you weren’t completely out of the woods, but you had a secured source of income, and you’d happily struggle and scrape over sleeping with Rafe ever again.
“Go find some other struggling girl to take advantage of,” you finally said to him, grabbing their drinks and making your way to their table without a backwards glance.
Tumblr media
Working at The Wreck was hard work, and no matter how many shifts you covered and how many tips you got, it was still long and hard work for half the money Rafe had ever paid you. You knew this when Kie came to you about the job, but on the other side of it, you were so beyond grateful for it. You were still stressed, of course, your monetary problems not going away anytime soon, but it was the normal stress of the average working twenty-something.
It wasn’t the kind of worry that came from a violent and abusive lover.
Rafe had been by the restaurant a few times since that day, and each time was more nerve-wracking than the last. Sometimes you served him, sometimes you didn’t, but it didn’t really matter because his gaze always found its way to you either way. On the days when Kie worked too, she’d ask you if you wanted her to do something about him, but you always declined.
After all, what reason would you have her give to her parents for kicking out the son of Ward Cameron who—to their knowledge—hadn’t done anything to warrant it?
Maybe you should’ve listened to Kie though. While you didn’t know if that would’ve changed things, you at least would have felt better about attempting to do something. Perhaps it was the mere sight of watching you work—watching you earn money independent of him—that made him snap, made him drop all pretenses completely. Barring him from the restaurant while you were there might’ve triggered some out of sight, out of mind response. It might’ve forced him to slowly get over whatever this thing was that he had about you.
It might have…
…and it also might not have done shit. Perhaps nothing would’ve changed, and you still would’ve found yourself tearfully staring at Kie’s mom as you took off your apron for the last time.
It was a normal Saturday when the texts and emails came through. The busiest day of the week, the most packed the restaurant ever would be for the next six days, and you’d been placing some fries down in front of some family’s kid when the noise in the restaurant…changed. You hadn’t been able to pinpoint how it changed, but if you did your best, it was like the chatters went from excitement about their food or whatever happened during the week to something else entirely.
One single thing that everyone was talking about.
You weren’t getting paid to mind your patrons’ business, but you started to think differently about that when the people at the table you were next to started to heavily eye you. The whole restaurant was loud with hushed chatter, so you couldn’t hear what they were saying, but the glances between the phones in their hands and you had you frowning.
You were slowly glancing around—realizing that that table wasn’t the only one—when you were yanked by your arm off the floor.
“What are you doing? What’s going on?” you worriedly wondered the moment Kie had you hidden from view.
The look on her face was hard to read, but her parted lips and wide eyes told you that she was horrified. She opened and closed her mouth a few times, seemingly unable to get the words out before slamming it shut, swallowing. The combination of her expression, her silence, and the lack of silence out there had a ball of dread forming deep in your gut.
“Kie,” you softly said. “What…what’s wrong?”
It took her a moment to speak.
“It’s Rafe,” she softly said.
Your confusion only grew, still not quite understanding. 
“What happened? Is he bothering you? Did…he do something to you?” you hesitantly asked, fearful that your former tormentor had turned his sights onto your friend.
“Not to me.”
That simple sentence started to put the pieces together, and you turned your face towards the front of the restaurant, recalling the stares and whispers and listening to the excited chatter. Your skin grew cold, goosebumps erupting all over you, and that dread was long gone. It was instead replaced by nausea.
“He sent everyone something…”
“No,” you heard yourself whisper.
“...a video.”
You turned to her with wide eyes, shaking your head in disbelief. Glancing down, you caught sight of her phone in her hand, and before Kie could stop you, you’d snatched it out of her grip. You moved out of her reach as she extended her arm, desperately trying to protect you, but it was too late.
You felt like you were weighed down by bricks as you stared at the two familiar faces on the screen.
It had to have been taken months ago, during one of the first few times you’d slept with him. You both were in Ward’s bedroom, and you remembered the day all too well, recalling the feel of his palm striking your skin and his voice in your ear before pulling your head down to his lip. Of course, it was that one and not one of the ones where he’d held you down and forced you to take his thrusts.
Your hand was empty, not even realizing when Kie had taken it back, simply staring into space at the memory of what was on that screen.
“Y/N, when my parents find out—and they’re going to find out—they…”
Her words died in the air at the sound of footsteps behind you, and you flinched when you heard a familiar voice call your name. Mrs. Carerra didn’t sound happy, and her expression fared no better when you turned around. You couldn’t stop your tears from spilling over as she gestured for you to follow her further into the back of the restaurant. You knew what was coming, what Kie was trying to prepare you for.
It was what Rafe wanted, after all…and he’d gotten it.
It was hours later when you were sitting with your back against your door, your phone turned off, overwhelmed by the influx of missed calls and messages from your friends. You’d only gotten a glimpse at them before finding your head bent inside of your toilet. Every single one of them bar Kie were shocked, their horror and confusion clear as day through their words. Only Pope had eventually sent a text that asked if you were okay.
…and the truth was that you weren’t.
You were so far from okay.
Rafe had won, he’d gotten exactly what he wanted, and even though Mrs. Carerra had expressed sympathy for your plight—more angry at the situation than anything else—she’d still had no choice but to let you go. Every other business in town valued the Cameron family way too much, and the only place that had been willing to hire you had been swayed by Rafe too in the worst manner possible.
It was well after midnight when your door shook from harsh knocks. You hadn’t moved in hours, just blankly staring at the wall, and you closed your eyes at the sound, positive it was one of your friends. You didn’t have the strength to face them, to answer questions and either break down or pretend you felt far better than you actually did.
You did, however, have the strength to face Rafe, your gaze lifting when his voice met your ears, demanding that you open the door.
His fist was still in the air when you swung it open, looking at him like he was something you’d find on the bottom of your shoes. He looked as put together as ever, completely unfazed by what he’d done. And why wouldn’t he be? This wouldn’t hurt his reputation and success in this town a bit. If nothing else, the video would have even more girls falling at his feet, but for some reason he didn’t seem to want that.
He preferred to force your hand instead.
“What is wrong with you?” you tearfully asked him, throat tight.
He didn’t respond right away, touching his tongue to his lip as his gaze roamed behind you.
“You gonna let me in?”
Your eyes almost popped out of your sockets, and he gave a haughty laugh.
“It’s not like I’ve left you with much of a choice, now, have I?”
He sounded so…proud of himself, and all you could do was cry as he brushed past you. He closed the door for you, noticing that you were struggling to move, and he kept his hand on the wood, his chest grazing your back as he pressed his face into your hair. You heard him deeply inhale, and you squeezed your eyes shut.
“I told you how this would end,” he whispered. “I gave you a chance to be smart about this.”
You went to move away from him, but his other hand shot out to grip your arm.
“You’re the one who made things way more difficult than they needed to be.” he continued. “We had a good thing going…and then you had to go and get sensitive and sentimental.”
When he forced you to face him, you kept your eyes on the collar of his shirt. The silence stretched as you refused to look at him, and you eventually heard Rafe heave a sigh. He let your arm go, and you watched him reach into his pocket, disappointed but not surprised by the roll of one hundred dollar bills he pulled out. When he straightened, he took your hand and placed the money in your palm, clasping your hands together.
A few more tears escaped when his fingers threaded through yours.
“Do you still feel like fighting this?” he quietly asked. “Let me know, right now, because I have all the time—and money—in the world.”
He slowly pulled you closer.
“You don’t.”
You shakily exhaled, reluctantly lifting your gaze to meet his own. You stared at one another for what felt like too long, and when he leaned in, taking your silence as defeat, you let him kiss you. It was a salty kiss, your own tears mixing in, but Rafe didn’t seem to mind, moving his lips against yours with a growing smile. His arm snaked its way around your waist, and the animalistic noise he let out told you just how excited he was to have you back under his thumb.
The couch seemed sufficient enough for him, bringing you both to it as he peeled your clothes off. You shuddered as the air hit your naked skin, thoughtlessly moving closer to his own body heat, and Rafe pressed a kiss to your shoulder as he laid you down. It felt like ages since you’d last slept with him, but you knew that wasn’t why you were trembling.
You were trembling because you finally realized you were sleeping with a monster. Before, Rafe had just been an opportunistic asshole to you. Rich, spoiled, selfish, the list went on, but now he was so much more than that. He was now someone who’d raped you on more than one occasion, and who had proved that he’d do anything to make you completely reliant on no one but him.
How else could he ensure that you’d never leave him? Never have any other choices but him? You’d eventually have to leave Outer Banks one day, you knew that to be true if you ever wanted a life independent of him, but that video could follow you around for the rest of your life, and very probably would.
When Rafe sheathed himself inside of you, stretching you out in a way that was regularly familiar to you, you gasped. The blond wasted no time in adopting a steady pace, fucking you hard against your couch, his fingers pressing into the arm of it. His grunts were soft in your ears, and despite your combined hatred and fear of him, you weren’t able to swallow down the whimpers that escaped your lips too.
You didn’t know what kind of hard on Rafe had for fucking someone he deemed so far beneath him, even more so to go through so much trouble of forcing you right back into his bed. You didn’t understand it one bit, and part of you never wanted to. You didn’t want to understand a thing that went on inside of his head, didn’t want to understand the thought process behind doing what he’d done to you.
His fingers scraped down your thigh before yanking you forward as he sat up some, looking down to where his cock disappeared into you. He was focused on the sight, lips parting as he panted from above you. He didn’t lean back down until your leg was over his shoulder, preventing you from moving much as he used you to chase his high, hips repeatedly curving against yours and forcing you to grip the couch.
“I missed this pussy so much,” he murmured, lips grazing the corner of your mouth as he spoke. “You drive me crazy, you know that?”
You hadn’t before, but you did, now.
When his hand landed on your throat, it didn’t hurt, but his thumb applied just enough pressure to keep you alert.
“I’ll stop calling your friends dirty Pogues if that makes you feel better,” he whispered, a gentle kiss from his lips to yours. “...but you still belong to me.”
2K notes · View notes
yanderenightmare · 8 months
Text
TW: yandere, dubcon themes, size difference
gn reader - fem clothing (babydoll)
Tumblr media
He's considered training you to take care of his morning wood, but the mere thought of waking up to you sucking him off is a good enough dream for him to settle for simply grinding against your ass instead.
You wake up with the warm feeling of his massive hand spread across your chest, a nipple caught between his rough fingers, while his other holds you at the hip, keeping your smaller body snug against him while he humps your rear in soft lolls.
The silk babydoll he put you in the night before is glassy against his chest and feels effortlessly smooth against the bulge in his boxers as he rubs the tent between your asscheeks, groaning at the feel while his cock perks up into a bigger and heavier beast within the confines.
Soon, it becomes painful to keep himself inside, and he lets out a hiss against your ear, slowly and carefully pulling the ill erection out. Blushed an angry red at the mushroomed tip. His veins feel stiff as iron beneath his fingers as he rubs over them carefully. Thick and sturdy, just like actual wood where you feel him bob against your spine - so big you need to swallow thinking about it, feeling yourself grow hotter while something needy awakens between your legs.
You don't want to ask for it because each time you ask for it, you end up taking his load in your mouth while he leaves for work without barely touching you at all. So instead, you pretend you're still sleepy, feeling him pull your nightie up over your hips, suppressing a gasp when his hot meat slaps your bare ass and starts fucking the crack.
His arm weighs down heavily on your waist as he sneaks around to touch between your thighs, giving a chuckle at what he feels.
"Mmh- what's this?" He groans in a groggy mutter, dark and gravely, the words breathed hotly against your neck, making your stomach spur. "Y'dreaming of taking my cock- hm?"
Lifting your thigh, he moves his shaft between them, rubbing it along your sex, fucking the sweet triangular space found there while his other hand moves from your chest to hold your throat. Groaning right at your ear, he makes you cum in his hand before entering you, spilling his hot seed inside you.
You're still fluttering from your orgasm and choking from the sudden intrusion - somewhat prepared for it after last night and an hour of dry-humping - but not entirely, feeling the sting as he settles deeper inside you, kneading your walls and making you bloat with a firm belly bulge. Cum leaking out the edges.
There's still an hour before he needs to get up, so he leaves himself inside your heat to keep warm.
Tumblr media
BNHA – Bakugou, Enji
JJK – Sukuna, Nanami, Geto, Toji
AOT – Erwin, Zeke
HxH – Uvogin
ATSV – Miguel
3K notes · View notes